January 2012 midnightwriters.webs.com midnight.writers2013@gmail.com
Ask Aphro & Dite
Musings of Hades
Athena’s Corner
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I’d like to start off this new year by apologizing to my darling wife, Persephone, for kidnapping her 3,500 years ago. Not that I haven’t already apologized to her (loads of times), this is just the first public declaration. And before Demeter tries to get supporters for her side, please note that Persephone was not as clueless as you think about the Underworldian binding clause when she ate those pomegranate seeds. (So there.) I’m pretty sure you all know about the whole seasons thing, so – oh, you don’t? Well, I’ve already explained it a million times, what’s another telling or two. Persephone ate pomegranate seeds, food of the Underworld, so she was bound permanently to my kingdom. But of course Demeter’s never quite grasped the concept of letting go of your child once she’s, oh, I don’t know, a hundred or so years old. She had a hissy fit with starving mankind, so Zeus had to mediate and decree that Persephone would stay one month with me for each seed she ate and the rest of the year with her mother. Persephone ate six seeds, so those six months are autumn and winter when she’s with me, and the rest spring and summer when she’s with Demeter, who has even worse temper tantrums than Zeus. And that’s saying something. Moving on. By the time you read this, my New Year’s Resolutions will be a bit late, but here you go: I promise to be nicer to Demeter if she meets me halfway, I’ll expand the Fields of Asphodel so that it’s not so overcrowded, and… well, I suppose someone ought to do something about that crisis in Greece.
Chomp: Carl Hiaasen, March 2012 Wahoo Cray and his father are animal wranglers who need a little money – which is why they accept an offer to work with Derek Badger, a man who thinks he wants to act with live animals in the swamps of Florida. Derek’s antics keep the Crays on their toes, keeping the reader gasping with laughter, until Wahoo’s friend runs away from home and hides out with the Crays, causing her crazy drunk father to appear and create even more chaos. Carl Hiaasen is an amazing writer, best know for his book Hoot, but his other books (Flush and Scat) are just as amazing and hilarious. Oh, and for those of you who obsess about reading books in order like I do, the books are all completely unrelated and you can read them in any order. Highly recommended for a good laugh!
Dear Aphro, This creepy girl with lots of issues is trying to add me as a contact. What do I do? Sincerely, Creeped Dear Creeped, If you know her and actually want to talk to her then accept her! But if you decide to ignore the request, that’s cool, too. If she keeps adding you even though you’ve already clearly told her no, then get help, because those are the genuinely creepy people. Love, Aphro <3 Dear Aphro, Me and my girlfriend never have any time alone. Please find me a solution. We’re always either too busy to see each other or something comes up, like her mom sending her brother down. And her brother is extremely intimidating and armed to the teeth with nerf weaponry. Sincerely, Wishing For Miracles Dear Wishing For Miracles, My advice is: get your license. Fast. Like, faster than humanly possible. Then you can be the one to drive you two lovebirds on dates as opposed to waiting for rides. Also, her brother sounds dangerous. Beware. Love, Aphro <3 Dear Aphrodite, Whenever somebody asks when I sleep, I reply without hesitation, “English class,” then realize I’m embarrassing myself and lie about sleeping for two hours. I never did this in middle school. Now I might as well make myself more comfortable by bringing a sleeping bag and a pillow. But as much as I love sleeping during class, (sleep is my best friend, second Continued Online
The Girl in the Steel Corset: Kady Cross, 2011 Finley may act like a kind, rather meek Victorian girl, but this bland exterior hides a dark and menacing secret. When Griffin discovers Finley, he is intrigued and takes her to his mansion, where she discovers that she is not as unusual as she thought. This book is a wonderful mix of action, steampunk, and romance that promises a thrilling ride. Fun and dark at the same time, very similar to Cassandra Clare’s Infernal Devices series in that way – and a great read!
Special thanks to Sra. Steele and acknowledgement to Hades, Athena, Hippolyta, and Hermes.