The Miami Hurricane - Sept. 15, 2014

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The Miami

Vol. 93, Issue 6 | September 15 - September 17, 2014

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HURRICANE

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STUDENT NEWSPAPER OF THE UNIVERSITY OF MIAMI IN CORAL GABLES, FLORIDA, SINCE 1929

NICK GANGEMI // PHOTO EDITOR

FRESHMAN 15: Freshman quarterback Brad Kaaya (No. 15) prepares for a snap during his third game with the Hurricanes. The Canes defeated Arkansas State University 41-20 during Saturday’s game at Sun Life Stadium. Kaaya had a total of 342 yards in this weekend’s game alone, the most by a true freshman in UM history.

ON THE MAP P100 THE CAMPUS TOUR ORGANIZATION IMPLEMENTS NEW, STRICTER RULES PAGE 3

PUT IT DOWN THE MIAMI HURRICANE STAFF COMMENTS ON TEXTING WHILE DRIVING PAGE 5

FALL FASHION EDGE OFFERS TOP TIPS ON HOW TO DRESS TO IMPRESS PAGES 8-9

Canes storm Sun Life Football team’s practices made difference for quarterback

BY NEIL DWYER SENIOR SPORTS WRITER

In the midst of an on-and-off drizzle in the third quarter, Canes quarterback Brad Kaaya threw a rainbow toward wide receiver Phillip Dorsett going long. The pass just flew outside his diving grasp, but by that point it didn’t matter.

Kaaya proved that the third time’s a charm in a 41-20 win at Sun Life Stadium. He went 16/23 and threw for a grand total of 342 yards – the most by a true freshman in UM history – but more importantly, no interceptions.

Coach Al Golden said that this week’s practice is what made the difference for Kaaya.

“I thought his timing was better, his rhythm was better,” he said. “I thought our precision on the routes was better. Obviously we gave him enough time to throw.”

September 15 - September 17, 2014

SEE FOOTBALL, PAGE 10

THE MIAMI HURRICANE

SPORTS

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CAMPUS LIFE

Food vendor serves Mediterranean cuisine Venue features Kosher dining options

BY LAUREN GOODE CONTRIBUTING NEWS WRITER

Eli Benhamou stands outside of the Merrick building every day, tempting passersby with the scent of shawarma spices.

His thick, silver beard, yarmulke and warm eyes are recognizable from the seven years he spent working as the head of Oasis, the on-campus Kosher deli that was displaced this year.

Now, he has welcomed students into the world of the Pita Pad, a new Mediterranean food kiosk located between the Merrick and Ferre buildings.

Benhamou is its supervisor – a man who has worked in the food industry for more than 30 years.

Although the kiosk is tucked away in a Jurassic Park-esque niche of campus, Benhamou believes that the location has been fruitful.

“This spot was the only one left on campus to set up the stand; it wasn’t selected by me,” he said. “Nevertheless, students are constantly passing by and asking what the smell is, inquiring upon what we’re selling.”

What they’re selling is pita and platters – of shawarma, schnitzel (simply called chicken tenders on the menu), and a variety of salads.

These salads include eggplant, red cabbage, hummus, tahini and tabouli.

Prices range from $6.99 for a veggie pita to $14.99 for a chicken tender plate. Also present are potato knishes (these run out fast), muffins, chocolates and candies.

The Pita Pad is Kosher – a religious dietary regiment that Benhamou himself has observed

TALIA HORVATH // CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHER SAVORY SELECTION: New to campus this semester, The Pita Pad serves kosher shawarma and chicken tenders among their other offerings.

his whole life – and is supervised by the Chabad at the University of Miami. Benhamou has gained prior experience with applying Kosher dietary laws in a commercial setting by working as a Kosher rabbi on cruise ships.

Despite the fact that the Pita Pad, like all on-campus dining options, is sponsored by food service company Chartwells, eating at this kiosk feels very personal.

The Pita Pad essentially markets itself with the potent scent wafting from the shawarma grill. The meat rotates on a vertical rotisserie rod and is marinated in 12 spices for 24 hours before portions are stripped for each student.

NEWS BRIEFS

Customers can also select every salad item and sauce that goes into their pita or platter.

Then, the meal is prepared in front of them by Benhamou and his assistant.

Senior Berna Berk, who has eaten at the Pita Pad four times now, said she identifies with the new dining option because of her ancestral origins.

“My family is 100 percent Turkish, and we have a food like shawarma but with a different name in my country,” Berk said. “The Pita Pad tasted like my home-cooked meals and is surprisingly very yummy for on-campus food.”

However, Benhamou emphasized that the Pita Pad is about more than catering to Kosher

AMY SARGEANT // CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHER SENSATIONAL SISTER: Lambda Theta Alpha member Lena Habash performs the sorority’s stroll during the PartyWalk event of National PanHellenic Council Week Friday.

“PUT IT DOWN” SAFETY FAIR The Florida Department of Transportation District Six and the University of Miami are partnering for “Put It Down,” a safety campaign educating students on the risks of using a phone while driving. The annual safety fair returns to educate on the consequences of distracted driving, and how to ensure safely navigating the roads. The

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THE MIAMI HURRICANE

September 15 - September 17, 2014

students on campus or any one specific culture.

Because the food is delivered to campus daily, he says it can be an appealing fresh option for anyone.

“Our motto is to provide fresh and goodtasting food for all students, and we’ve been very successful here thus far,” he said.

This can be seen in Pita Pad’s wider appeal, including for vegetarian students.

Junior Smitha Vasan, ordering a meal at the kiosk, said that she came because she has always liked Mediterranean food and had recently heard about it.

“I’ve been strictly vegetarian for my whole life, so I liked that I was able to order the vegetarian wrap. … I definitely plan on going back,” Vasan said. “It’s hard to find a lot of options on campus that taste good and adhere to my limitations.”

The kiosk opens at 11 a.m. Monday through Friday and closes at 7 p.m. every day except for Friday, when Benhamou closes up shop at 3 p.m. in observance of the Sabbath.

IF YOU GO WHERE: Outside of the Merrick Building WHEN: 11 a.m. to 7 p.m. Monday through Thursday, 11 a.m. to 3 p.m.

Friday PAYMENT: Cash, Credit and Cane Card If you are interested in part-time advertising work for the Pita Pad, email eli.benhamou@gmail.com for more information.

annual safety fair returns to UM from 11 a.m. to 2 p.m. Thursday on the Rock.

Sciences Gallery and Conference Center at the Wesley Foundation House.

IBIS READING SERIES

ICE CREAM PARTY

The Ibis Literary Reading and Performance Series of 2014-2015, sponsored by the College of Arts and Sciences, The English Department the University of Miami Creative Writing Program, will kick off Thursday. A variety of writers and posts from a range of specialties in language, culture, and the narrative have been invited to campus as part of the event. For September, poets Jaswinder Bolina, Neil de la Flor and Oliver de la Paz will be featured. The first Ibis Reading Series will take place at 7 p.m. Thursday at the College of Arts and

In honor of Norm Parsons, executive director of the Patti and Allan Herbert Wellness Center, a “Sweet Goodbye” celebration for his retirement will feature an ice cream party at 7 p.m. on Thursday at the Centre Court of the Wellness Center. Students are invited to indulge in a sweet treat while celebrating the work that Parsons has dedicated to the university for over 30 years.

Emily Dabau may be emailed at edabau@ themiamihurricane.com.

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STUDENT ORGANIZATION

Members gain more responsibility

BY MARLEE LISKER NEWS EDITOR

Senior Seth Furman has been walking backward as a President’s 100 (P100) tour guide since his freshman year.

“The secret is walking on the toes of your feet,” he said. “If you walk on your heels, you’ll fall over; if you walk on your toes, you have complete control of your body. That’s a little P100 trick.”

P100, a group of students who serve as ambassadors and tour guides for the University of Miami, is about more than walking backward.

Despite its name, P100 actually has more than 100 members. This year, the organization is adapting to make the program more competitive in hopes of staying true to its name.

Assistant Director of Admissions Jeffrey Jenkins is one of the admissions officers who works closely with P100.

“Philosophically speaking, we are getting back to what it means to be an ambassador, not just a tour guide, even though that’s a big part of it,” he said.

Jenkins explained the benefits of keeping the organization smaller and more selective.

“We would like to be a strong group of representatives for the university, and I think our selectivity plays into that,” he said. “As with any student organization, we want to feel a sense of purpose, mission and ownership with what we do, and I think having a smaller group helps to contribute to that, at least for us.”

This selectivity will start to play out in the next few months, as some of the 200 applicants who applied this fall will begin the interview process.

In addition to a written application, interested students must also take part in two interviews. One is an oral presentation in front of a group, the other a two-on-one interview with an admissions officer and an advisory board member.

Senior Michelle Chang, who has been on P100 for all three years she was at UM, said

that the interview process helps them pinpoint characteristics necessary to be a member, or a “P.” These qualities include being reliable and comfortable speaking in front of people, having a good work ethic and displaying oneself as approachable and friendly.

“Being a tour guide, you really have to know the information and love UM,” she said.

Recently, each of the ten advisory board members were assigned a specific role. Whereas admissions officers have played a larger role in the past, this change is meant to give students more responsibility within the organization.

Senior Stephanie Schwartz’s role is “points chair,” which means she keeps track of the points P100s earn when they complete a tour, work at open house events or assist with other activities. This point system also works to keep members accountable.

Schwartz said that being a good tour guide is about more than just memorizing facts about the university.

“The tours are a lot of personal experiences and life experience, it’s not always just numbers and facts,” she said. “Usually we try

to stray from that because we want to give people a look inside the life of a student. So, when we pass the lake I’ll talk about the boat burning because it’s my favorite part of homecoming.”

Furman, another member of the advisory board, said that tour captains were assigned for the first time this year. They take attendance before the tour and make sure all the guides are present and mingling with students and parents beforehand.

He also said that each student will be required to give one “special tour,” which is usually composed of a group of students who attend the tour with a school or program, rather than with their parents.

Furman thinks the organization plays an essential role on campus.

“I always tell people that P100 is the most important student organization on campus because if it’s not good, you have no other student organization on campus because no one wants to come here,” he said.

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CAMPUS LIFE

Cloud system opens for campus use More storage services to become available

BY DAVID O’CONNELL CONTRIBUTING NEWS WRITER

This fall, three cloud-based data systems – Box, Google Drive and Microsoft OneDrive – will all be available to students, faculty and staff free of charge. Box is the only to have been released. Google and Microsoft OneDrive will be offered later in the semester.

Cloud storage enables users to store and manage content within a secure online setting, share files, and collaborate with individuals and groups. This eliminates the need for tedious emails between lab partners, classmates and coworkers and allows users to upload, edit and share content simultaneously inside a protected environment.

The cloud rollout is in response to students and faculty’s needs for safe and secure storage

on-the-go, said Cristina Sotolongo, director of communications for UM’s IT department.

Each storage option offers different capabilities.

According to Sotolongo, Box has 25 GB of free space and is recommended for storing secure data because it is highly encrypted, which is converted data to prevent unauthorized access. Google Drive, which is similar to Google Docs, allows users to store information in one place and make edits that are instantly saved.

OneDrive offers a terabyte of space per person, which is helpful for large media files such as films.

While editing files offline, changes made using these systems will immediately sync and be uploaded. Users can recall information almost instantaneously and store information from their hard drive.

The mobile and desktop versions of Box, Google Drive and OneDrive will be available as each system is officially released.

Because of the cloud’s capacity for bulk data storage in a web-accessible format, sensitive information can be backed up at all times without cluttering space on a laptop’s hard drive.

Users’ secure cloud information can then be accessed from any computer with Internet access.

Junior Austin Kallman is “skeptical about the security of the cloud,” citing recent security deficits, such as Heartbleed, which resulted in the theft of secure information from a variety of websites in April.

The Heartbleed bug allows hackers to infiltrate and read the memory of the systems stored using vulnerable versions of the OpenSSL, a commonly used encryption software.

“I will be using the cloud because of its ease and accessibility, but I won’t be uploading any sensitive or personal material,” Kallman said.

Sotolongo said that all the programs offered to the university community take precautions when it comes to privacy.

“All of these services offer end-to-end security that exceeds our own on-premise storage

offerings or consumer counterparts like Dropbox,” she said.

Since users must log in securely with their CaneID and password, UM can maintain a “consistently high standard for password strength, data retention and management across all devices, including mobile,” Sotolongo said.

The University will be encrypting the files during transit, and specifically in the case of Box, the files are also encrypted “at rest” during storage.

More information about these storage solutions and directions to access them will be distributed via UMail.

Students and faculty can use their CaneID and password to access their Box accounts at app.box.com.

Google Drive and Microsoft OneDrive will be released later in the fall semester.

PHOTO BRIEF

Groups convene to remember fallen heroes NEVER FORGET: Students gather in remembrance of the 9/11 attacks. Several student organizations collaborated to hold a 9/11 National Day of Service and Remembrance Thursday. On the Rock during the day, the Zeta Tau Alpha Fraternity collected toiletries and personal hygiene items, The Alpha Delta Pi Sorority sold 9/11 awareness ribbons, and the National Pan-Hellenic Council had a banner for students to write messages of encouragement. After dark, a remembrance service and candlelight vigil were held at the UC. GIANCARLO FALCONI // CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHER

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OPINION speak UP WHAT WOULD YOU DO WITHOUT YOUR PHONE FOR THE DAY?

“Honestly, I don’t really use my phone that much. I live with all the friends I usually hang out with, so I’m always around them.”

NATHAN MORALES FRESHMAN

CHRIS FAMA SOPHOMORE

“I would probably get behind on a lot of work because I use my phone more than my laptop.

And I wouldn’t be able to talk on my phone, so I’d be bored all day.”

“I lost my charger last weekend, so I was without my phone for 24 hours. It was disturbing how attached I was to my phone. I hate it. I hate having to need my phone.”

NICK SIRIO JUNIOR

SPEAK UP ANSWERS ARE EDITED FOR CLARITY, BREVITY AND ACCURACY. COMPILED BY SHERMAN HEWITT

“

If you really think a cell phone is the only source of entertainment available in a car, you haven’t put enough thought into

The Miami

how to best preserve your life.

Founded 1929

The Miami Hurricane, Editorial board

HURRICANE

”

Put down the phone, turn up the volume people at once. But does having your own private universe really sound that bad?

There will always be people trying to sink their fingers into your life, scrambling for chunks of your time. A car provides an incontestable reason to shut them all out.

Even as Florida’s ban goes largely ignored, “I was driving” still serves as a valid, even respectable, excuse for missing a fragment of communication.

Everyone has a list of things they supposedly never have time to do. But in a car, faced with half an hour or an hour of unscheduled time, they sigh, tap their fingers on the steering wheel in frustration, and pour out streams of frivolous messages or browse the Internet when they could be dedicating themselves to the items on that list.

Take advantage of that by dedicating your time in the car to your own needs.

Enjoy your downtime by turning on the radio and singing along. If pop music makes you shudder and cringe, come prepared. Enter the car with a playlist, or CD, of songs you actually like so you don’t have to depend on

BUSINESS OFFICE: 305-284-4401 FAX: 305-284-4404 For advertising rates call 305-284-4401 or fax 305-284-4404.

STAFF EDITORIAL

Imagine you’re trapped in an enclosed space for an extended period of time, performing an activity that, for the most part, requires little conscious engagement.

In your pocket sits a singular source of entertainment.

Using it is not in your best interest, but it’s your only defense against hopeless, soul-sucking boredom, so it’s worth it.

The above scenario describes, for many people, the experience of sitting in a car in slow-moving traffic or on a low-speed drive. But the first anniversary of Florida’s official texting and driving ban, coming up in October, presents a great opportunity to re-evaluate driving habits.

If you really think a cell phone is the only source of entertainment available in a car, you haven’t put enough thought into how to best preserve your life.

A top-down view of a road depicts rows and rows of seemingly independent spheres of existence, like tiny universes. Nowadays, of course, with a data plan, a person can sit inside an automobile and maintain a connection to thousands of

An Associated Collegiate Press Hall of Fame Newspaper

the radio.

You can also apply yourself to learning something new. Download podcasts that will teach you a new language. Listen to RadioLab and learn what makes cities tick. Turn on the news and inform yourself about current events.

Or you can use the time to get caught up on things you have to do anyway. You shouldn’t try to write an English paper against your steering wheel, but there’s a chance you can listen to the audio version of the book assigned for class. If you’re preparing for an oral exam, record yourself going through the presentation and play it back on your car’s sound system.

Nobody likes to be stuck in traffic, but it isn’t usually something in a person’s control. What you can control, however, is how you use that time, and with a bit of thought, you can easily avoid breaking the law and putting yourself, and others, in danger.

Editorials represent the majority view of The Miami Hurricane editorial board.

Hit a musical roadblock? Check out our Concert in the Car playlist on the UBuzz Blog! Find it on themiamihurricane.com.

September 15 - September 17, 2014

EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Alexander Gonzalez

BUSINESS MANAGER Christopher Dalton

MANAGING EDITOR Erika Glass

SALES REPRESENTATIVES Frank Carey Halima Dodo James Hillyer Jordan Llano Paul Spano Rebecca Strickland Zed Zaidi

ART DIRECTOR Sarbani Ghosh PHOTO EDITOR Nick Gangemi ASSISTANT PHOTO EDITOR Hallee Meltzer

MULTIMEDIA EDITOR Erika Jackson

NEWS EDITOR Marlee Lisker

AD DESIGNER Katherine Lee

OPINION EDITOR Alexa Langen

DESIGNERS Emma Deardorff Madeleine Trtan Savannah DeBrosse

EDGE EDITOR Ashley Martinez SPORTS EDITOR Courtney Fiorini

ONLINE EDITOR Lyssa Goldberg

ASSISTANT SPORTS EDITOR Danny New

WEBMASTER Georges Duplessy

ASSISTANT EDITOR Emily Dabau

ADMINISTRATIVE ASSISTANT Isabel Vichot

COPY CHIEF Sherman Hewitt

FACULTY ADVISER Ileana Oroza

COPY EDITORS Monica Sabates Alina Zerpa

FINANCIAL ADVISER Steve Priepke

To reach a member of the staff visit themiamihurricane.com’s contact page. ©2014 University of Miami

The Miami Hurricane is published semi-weekly during the regular academic year and is edited and produced by undergraduate students at the University of Miami. The publication does not necessarily represent the views and opinions of advertisers or the university’s trustees, faculty or administration. Unsigned editorials represent the opinion of The Miami Hurricane’s Editorial Board.

Commentaries, letters and cartoons represent only the views of their respective authors. The newsroom and business office of The Miami Hurricane are located in the Student Activities Center, Student Media Suite 200.

LETTER POLICY The Miami Hurricane encourages all readers to voice their opinions on issues related to the university or in response to any report published in The Miami Hurricane. Letters to the editor may be submitted typed or handwritten to the Student Activities Center, Student Media Suite 200, or mailed to P.O. Box 248132, Coral Gables, Fla., 33124-6922. Letters must be signed with a copy of your Cane Card.

ADVERTISING POLICY The Miami Hurricane’s business office is located at 1330 Miller Drive, Student Activities Center Student Media Suite 200. The Miami Hurricane is published on Mondays and Thursdays during the university’s fall and spring academic terms. Newspapers are distributed for free on the Coral Gables campus, the School of Medicine and off-campus locations.

DEADLINES All ads must be received, cash with copy, in The Miami Hurricane business office, Student Activities Center Student Media Suite 200, by noon Tuesday for Thursday’s issue and noon Friday for Monday’s issue.

SUBSCRIPTIONS The Miami Hurricane is available for subscription at the rate of $50 per year.

AFFILIATIONS The Miami Hurricane is a member of the Associated Collegiate Press, Columbia Scholastic Press Association and Florida College Press Association.

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OPINION

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Private company swoops down on corporate crime otham City Research, a private company that bets against the companies they find to be fraudulent, announced their most recent target this past summer: Let’s Gowex ANDREW SA, a Spanish Wi-Fi LANGEN provider. Within days, ECONOMICS Gowex collapsed enCOLUMNIST tirely and trading has been suspended, making their shares essentially worthless.

Gotham City Research, along with a Chinese firm called Muddy Waters Research, is a new kind of corporate watchdog, one that stands to make a profit off the crime it discovers. Profit will thus act as an incentive to expose wrongdoing, and although this business scheme may be abused by less reputable companies, it will make it much more difficult for companies to evade justice.

G

Gotham City Research (GCR) does not bust other companies to make the world a better place. When GCR discovers evidence of fraud by analyzing another company’s financial documents, it borrows shares of their target from an investment bank. Immediately afterward, they sell the documents in a process called short selling. Then GCR publishes their fraud report on the Internet.

Other investors begin to sell shares of the potentially fraudulent company, out of fear of government intervention and because they know now that their investment is worth less than they initially believed. This sudden surge in sales causes share prices to drop, because there are now more sellers than buyers.

Now, GCR purchases these shares for close to nothing and returns them to the bank they borrowed from. This difference between the price they sold the stock for and what it was bought it for is their profit. Which means if the company goes bankrupt, GCR has doubled its money.

The potentially enormous profit creates an incentive to lie. An investment group may invent misleading information about a company to make money off the downside, called a pump and dump scheme, which is illegal. Although normally done with positive information to increase the price of a share, shorting a stock can be just as profitable.

However, it is unlikely that a company will succeed in artificially deflating a stock’s value. By posting online that another company is committing fraud, it does not mean that investors automatically believe it.

GCR has gained trust from five accurate reports, and all stocks have dropped by 20 percent or more. Moreover, they use almost entirely public information in their analysis, many of their conclusions plainly obvious to anyone willing to do the research. For example, Gowex’s letter to English-speaking investors contained factual errors conspicuously absent from the Spanish version.

GCR presents more than just a novel way for a company to turn a profit: It has the potential to fundamentally change the way corporate responsibility is handled.

Currently, the only groups investigating fraud in the business world are government organizations like the SEC, investigative journalists and, to a much lesser extent, corporate overseer groups like FINRA. These groups are understaffed and ill-equipped to investigate every single company, enabling criminals to keep fraud undiscovered for much longer. Gowex, for instance, had been releasing fraudulent information for eight years before the truth was revealed.

When investigating wrongdoing becomes as profitable as committing it, it will become much harder for corporations to hide the truth from the outside world.

Andrew Langen is a sophomore majoring in economics and mathematics.

COMIC

CAI DUHART // CARTOONIST

Military weapons destroy trust between police officers, public he increased militarization of our police stands at the forefront of the crisis in Ferguson. The New York Times reports that, since 2006, local police departments have received more than 90,000 machine guns from the military, along with some armored vehicles and grenade launchers.

While there are certainly crimes that require police to arm themselves heavily, for the most part, this equipment is unnecessary and employed in completely inappropriate ways.

T

KEVIN CHALEK CONTRIBUTING COLUMNIST

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THE MIAMI HURRICANE

Police may be particularly eager to use this equipment knowing they have limited time to do so. The program that funnels military equipment to local police departments, the 1033 Program, states that the equipment must be used within a year or else it is returned.

In this short period, police cannot develop the necessary experience to handle these weapons and use them carelessly.

Many policemen feel that pointing machine guns at people is the best way to discourage violence. This act of perceived aggression erodes the already collapsing trust built between police and the people they are supposed to be protecting.

Police have also used tear gas inappropriately to disperse Ferguson protestors. Tear gas is forbidden in war because of its status as a chemical weapon, yet legal to use in domestic control

September 15 - September 17, 2014

in America. If it is so dangerous that it is prohibited in warfare, how can it be legal for police departments to use it in a domestic setting? The use of tear gas illustrates how the police of Ferguson view the people they are assigned to protect and serve.

Instead of focusing on individuals trying to incite riots, or the looters who strike local Ferguson shops at night, the police seemed to treat all of Ferguson as one entity that should be dealt with by using military, and paramilitary, action.

It is time to not only evaluate the military weapons police receive, as President Obama has said he will do, but also time to evaluate why police officers carry weapons at all and when they should use them.

Kevin Chalek is a junior majoring in chemistry.

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TV series bands unlikely friends together

BY EMILY DABAU ASSISTANT EDITOR

Charlie

Leo

At first glance, FOX’s new TV series, “Red Band Society” might look like a predictable story of teenagers making the most of their lives despite tough circumstances and life-threatening illnesses.

The dramedy, however, sets itself apart by digging deeper, with an honest approach to the illnesses and relationships each character faces, and a diverse cast that is hard not to love. Based on its pilot, “Red Band Society” has a promising theme of facing adulthood in an unconventional setting.

“Red Band Society” follows the lives of six patients at Ocean Park Hospital in Los Angeles. Twelve-year-old Charlie, who is in a coma at the hospital, narrates. The teenagers at Ocean Park are each there for different reasons – from cancer to eating disorders – but are united and form an unlikely group of friends, as represented by the red hospital bands they each wear.

Academy award-winning actress Octavia Spencer (“The Help”) stars in the series as the “mean” Nurse Jackson, alongside fresh faces like Charlie Rowe, who stars as charming and rebellious Leo, and Brian Bradley (Astro on the “The X Factor”) who plays the role of Leo’s best friend, Dash. Ciara Bravo plays Emma, the girl next door, and Zoe Levin (“Arrested Development”) takes on the role of mean girl cheerleader, Kara.

Each character is different, bringing diverse qualities and personalities to the series. They have complex relationships with each other, as love and friendships develop throughout the time they live together in the hospital.

The show is realistic in the situations faced, and the characters are honest with one another, never sugar-coating what they go through. They are honest about how they feel, about themselves and toward each other.

While they each are given titles from “coma boy” to “popular girl,” as the characters spend more time with each other, situations change, truth is revealed, and they learn more about one another, realizing that appearances can be misleading. The plot and memorable characters make it a show with potential to grow.

“Red Band Society” premieres at 9 p.m. EST Wednesday on FOX.

Nickname: Coma Boy Diagnosis: Coma Biggest Obstacle: Rekindling a relationship with his father after the accident

Nickname: The Rebel Diagnosis: Cancer Biggest Obstacle: Lifting everyone’s spirits, uniting them and putting differences aside as a leader

Jordi

Dash

Nickname: The New Guy Diagnosis: Leg amputee Biggest Obstacle: Learning how to cope from the amputation and continue to do the things he loves

Nickname: The Player Diagnosis: Cystic fibrosis Biggest Obstacle: Figuring out who his true love interest is

Kara

Emma

Nickname: Mean Girl Diagnosis: Heart failure Biggest Obstacle: Caring for others and forming close friendships

Nickname: The Girl Next Floor Diagnosis: Anorexia Biggest Obstacle: Shyness, sensitivity and insecurity about what she eats

German film portrays unconventional coming-of-age story

BY EMMANUEL LAVEAU CONTRIBUTING EDGE WRITER

Though it may sound like it takes place in a moist swamp, this German gross-out sex comedy begins with a zoom in of hemorrhoid scratching and the main character using her snatch as Bounty paper towel. This may leave viewers discouraged from watching the film, but don’t be.

This movie follows queer, zany, off-beat, kooky and whacky teenage Helen (Carla Juri) through her hemorrhoidal trials and parents’ divorce.

Juri’s performance is enchanting. A better Helen could not have been chosen, simply because no one could have played it better than she. Authenticity lies at the heart of who Helen is. Rebellious and free, Helen indulges her full curiosity with little fear.

From turning her vagina into a “living pussy-hygiene experiment” to testing the efficacy of different vegetables in her snatch, Helen’s “sexperiments” will leave an audience’s jaws agape. One of the greatest aspects of this movie is how director David Wnendt manages to maintain Helen’s angelic innocence regardless of her eccentricities.

One particularly poignant scene depicts 8-year-old Helen jumping down a high wall into her mother’s outstretched arms to end up hurting herself when her mother steps aside and lets her hit the pavement. Her mother then tells Helen not to “trust anybody, not even your parents. Better a scraped up knee now than a broken heart later.”

The divorce and breakup of her nuclear family nags at Helen as she sacrifices her health in an attempt to mend her parents’ relationship.

The bulk of the movie takes place in the hospital as a result of an anal fissure –of course– exacerbated by cauliflower-esque hemorrhoids.

Time loses meaning as the screen flashes through Helen’s real or imagined life.

The film embodies the divide that forms between parents and their maturing children.

The scene where Helen greets her soon-to-be best friend at the door isn’t quite kosher, and I’m sure the parents hate it, but it salutes the imminent gain of independence.

Our dear protagonist participates in actions she knows her mother would highly disapprove of, all the while scoffing at how uptight her mother is.

Helen rebels against her mother’s lies in search of her own truth; we never lose the sense of Helen trying to find her way.

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Wnendt’s vision brings “Wetlands” to life as more than just a comedy. Shockingly delightful and delightfully shocking, with the added flavor of romance and teen angst, this film is a must-see and soon-to-be everyone’s favorite film of the year.

Be sure to keep an eye on the rising star that is Juri.

IF YOU GO WHAT: “Wetlands” WHEN: Through Thursday Sept. 18 WHERE: O Cinema Wynwood 90 NW 29th Street Miami, FL For more information, visit o-cinema. org/event/wetlands/

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Breaking down Miami dress codes

BY HALEY WALKER | CONTRIBUTING EDGE WRITER JACK RIEGER | CONTRIBUTING EDGE WRITER

Miami is a city known for its distinct style. Dress codes can vary for one event, which can make it difficult to know what’s appropriate. These unwritten rules can be baffling, which is why we’re here to help. Here are Edge’s suggestions on what to wear for different occasions, from a networking event to a casual night out at the Grove. For more style tips, visit themiamihurricane.polyvore.com.

WEEKEND GIRLS: This flirty ensemble begs for a Friday night out: dress up a bohemian crop and cutoffs with peep-toe heels and a kimono blazer– then add a cutesy, conversation-starter clutch.

The best part is that comfort is not compromised.

GUYS: A weekend party is open to different looks: if you want to be the life of the party, wear a shirt or pant with a bold print. If you want to talk to a few people you know, turn down the volume; this mode allows you to slip in and out of the party.

GAME DAY GUYS: If you’ll be sitting in the general seats of the stadium, dress for comfort. It would also be wise to leave anything easily stained at home.

GIRLS: Cheer on the Canes with a Miami-vibes tee dress and clear tote. Instead of all-over color clashing, add pops of orange with nail polish and strappy sandals.

COCKTAIL PARTY GIRLS: Give the LBD a makeover with a lacey blackand-navy pattern dress. Add a pop of fall color with jewel earrings and a wine-colored lipstick.

GUYS: It’s time for the tie to come out. The tie can have some creativity to it, if so desired. A well-tailored suit will make you look and feel great. A spread collar white shirt can do no wrong and will allow the tie to be the spark of the outfit.

PHOTO ILLUSTRATIONS BY HALLEE MELTZER AND EMMA DEARDORFF

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GARDEN PARTY GIRLS: Soft pastels in a bold pattern keep this upscale look outdoor-appropriate. A structured dress and pointed pumps are perfect for weddings, graduations or a party in the garden. Top this look off with some simple, elegant jewelry.

GUYS: The garden party is more formal than you may think, but still carries a relaxed and light atmosphere. Stick with denim shirts, chambray shirts, short sleeve button-down shirts, shirts with a nice relaxed print, and lightweight chinos, linen, or seersucker pants. Increase the formality of the outfit with nicer shoes, such as suede bucs, derby shoes or nice loafers with heels.

BUSINESS CASUAL GUYS: This term means “no tie.” A light, unconstructed blazer with a button down shirt can work nicely.

Pair with some chinos and suede buc shoes. Jeans are usually a valid option, but use discretion.

GIRLS: Clean-cut pieces with menswear-inspired accessories are both trendy and office-appropriate. If going monochromatic, break it up with subtle shades like burgundy and denim.

SMART CASUAL GIRLS: Perfect for class presentations, casual dates and everyday wear, pair a striped tunic and loose jeans with brightly colored accessories for a look that is interesting, but not overbearing.

GUYS: One step below full business attire, an easy way to transition from business casual is to lose the jeans and increase the seriousness of your shoes. The blazer from business casual easily works here.

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SPORTS 201

receiving yards by Phillip Dorsett

126

kills by Savanah Leaf this season

FOOTBALL FROM COVER

Canes exhibit technique against Arkansas Red Wolves Dorsett finished the afternoon with 201 yards and two touchdowns – far-and-away Kaaya’s favorite target against the Arkansas State Red Wolves.

Dorsett didn’t just have himself a game going into the endzone, he had himself a game with the long ball; when he made plays, he made BIG plays. On his first four catches, he racked up 201 yards.

No FBS receiver has caught for so many yards on a maximum of four catches since 1997.

“When my number’s called, I just execute,” Dorsett said. “I know what plays are coming to me and I work on those plays a lot in practice.”

Miami got off to a roaring start on the second play of their first drive when Dorsett actually caught a rainbow arc from Kaaya and cruised into the east endzone. After the Red Wolves tied it, Miami finished the quarter with two more touchdowns; a flip pass to Duke Johnson and a Kaaya to Clive Walford connection for a 20-7 lead. Michael Badgley missed one of three PAT kicks in the quarter.

With five minutes and three seconds left in the first half and Arkansas State driving to make it a one-score game, the Red Wolves tried a fake punt on fourth and fifth, only for Luke Ferguson to be picked off by Raphael Kirby at Miami’s 31-yard line. Kaaya then led a 69-yard touchdown drive capped

by Gus Edwards’s 27-yard rush to his left and into the endzone.

Although the Red Wolves got a quick seven at the end of the first half and got a hold of whatever momentum they had left by kicking and recovering an onside kick to start the second half, the Canes stuffed them and finished the game with two more touchdowns – a 64-yarder to Dorsett flying down 10

SPORTS

NICK GANGEMI // PHOTO EDITOR SHAKE THEM OFF: Sophomore running back Gus Edwards breaks a tackle during his 27-yard touchdown run. The Canes defeated Arkansas State 41-20 during Saturday’s game at Sun Life Stadium.

Arkansas State’s sideline and a sweet pass to freshman Braxton Berrios between two defenders.

Dorsett said that he always knew the connection from Kaaya would work out.

“I feel like we always had this timing down. We hadn’t really opened up the playbook up like we did today,” Dorsett said. “I wasn’t really worried about the timing because I knew that was going to be there.”

“I think he’s one of the fastest players in college football.,”

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said Kaaya about Dorsett. “With his speed, I don’t see how anyone could cover him on a post-run or a go route. I could throw it as hard as I possibly can and I probably couldn’t overthrow him.”

Defensively, it was a bit of a coming-out party for the Canes, especially for Deon Bush. The junior cornerback finished with six tackles, a sack and a forced fumble. Bush said the defense has improved every game.

“We’re trusting the staff and they’re doing a great job by putting

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us in the right position to make plays,” Bush said. “We’re just executing good. We just got to keep preparing for the next week.”

Golden said that Dorsett’s responded to an injury-filled junior season with a spectacular senior campaign.

“He comes out this summer and had an unbelievable summer,” Golden said. “He’s practicing really well right now, he has great stamina, we’re happy for him. He’s catching the ball really well.”

Golden also put huge emphasis on the personal growth of his squad with a mix of freshmen and veterans.

“We’re not a finished product, not where we want to be yet, but I thought we got better,” Golden said. “If we were looking ahead and weren’t focused, we wouldn’t have thrown it around the way we did… the second and third efforts we got from the running backs were excellent, in addition to what we saw on defense.”

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TENNIS

Women’s tennis team takes victory in Duke invitational Junior Stephanie Wagner wins gold

BY ALEXA PAPPAS CONTRIBUTING SPORTS WRITER

After an eventful summer that included winning the singles bracket in a Gainesville ITA circuit event that led to a No. 9 ranking in the ITA preseason poll, the Hurricanes women’s tennis team walked onto the Cary, North Carolina courts this weekend with confidence.

Three freshmen followed veterans Clementia Riobueno, Monique Albuquerque, and 18-ranked Stephanie Wagner into Duke University’s Fab Four tournament, and they all left with something to brag about.

All-American Riobueno posted one of the most impressive matches, a 6-4, 2-6, 6-3 win over Virginia’s 32nd-ranked Stephanie Nauta.

Riobueno went on to lose to North Carolina’s Haley Carter in the third place round.

The dominant, third-ranked duo of Riobueno and Albuquerque continued their superb teamwork with easy 8-2 and 8-3 wins in the early rounds to go on to win the doubles tournament against Mississippi’s Natalie Suk

and Zalina Khairudinova. This dynamic duo took the double’s bracket Sunday in an 8-5 victory against Ole Miss.

Wagner and true freshman Sinead Lohan played for the third-place match. Wagner, a junior from Amberg, Germany, advanced to the final round of singles play after two commanding, straight-set wins in the first and second rounds. She ousted No. 14 Brianna Morgan of Florida for the Singles Final gold.

Freshman Wendy Zhang started her college career strong, picking up two wins against Furman’s Karlee Bryde in straight sets and North Carolina’s Marika Akkerman 7-6(1), 6-1. The China native would then go on to outduel another Furman Paladin - this time being freshman Ansley Speaks.

By Saturday, the Canes bagged 14 wins, two finals appearances.

The Hurricanes will play in invitationals and regional tournaments until the regular season starts in January. Last season, they went 21-6 in head-to-head matches, including a 10game, month-long win streak that constituted of eight ACC teams.

The Canes will host their next match on Sept. 19 for the Miami Fall Invite.

PHOTO COURTESY HURRICANESPORTS.COM Junior Stephanie Wagner at Duke University’s Fab Four invitational on Saturday. She advanced to the singles final where she defeated Brianna Morgan of the University of Florida to win the Singles Final gold.

NEWS

Football player suspended Defensive end to not play this season

NURTURE YOUR CALLING

BY COURTNEY FIORINI SPORTS EDITOR

The University of Miami has suspended Hurricanes’ No. 98 defensive end Al-Quadin Muhammad.

“Al-Quadin Muhammad is not currently enrolled for the fall semester and will not be participating in athletics,” university spokesperson Margot Winick said.

The university defines suspension as “complete separation from the university.” As a result, Muhammad will no longer participate in football for the duration of his suspension.

Muhammad’s suspension is the result of an individual discipline case; therefore, details cannot be disclosed.

The university has not released any more information, but according to The Miami Herald, the suspension stemmed from a confrontation with his roommate, who was left with a broken nose.

Muhammad is a sophomore and four-star recruit from Irvington, New

want to bring integrative “Ihealth to everyday people. ” Stephen Phipps, ND (2013)

Create a Healthier World

MUHAMMAD

Jersey. The 6-foot-4-inch, 245-pound reserve defensive end played in all 13 games in 2013 as a true freshman.

He totaled eight tackles total, seven solo tackles and two sacks. Both sacks occurred in the 77-7 win against Savannah State on Sept. 21, 2013 at home. Muhammad made two solo tackles against Louisville in the Russell Athletic Bowl.

Muhammad did not play in the first two games this season, retaining eligibility upon his return.

Degrees Include: Ayurvedic Sciences Naturopathic Medicine Cjig^i^dn EhnX]dad\y B^Yl^[Zry

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DEAR V These itty bitty beds leave me hanging

So here’s the big question: How do peeps get the deed done on those skinny little twin beds?

As most college students will learn – and especially our fruitful little freshmen – it is next to impossible to cozy up for some coitus on these narrow cribs. It’s like they gave us the Costco sample of an actual bed.

So, once again, the big question is: How can two people (maybe three, or even two and a half if you’re feeling adventurous) squeeze onto these planks of padding to fulfill their sexual college bucket list?

Well, don’t worry. As always, your dear friend V is here to help.

There are multiple options for this, so I shall provide a few.

First off, the obvious choice is standing. However, if you are like me, you get tired from standing for long periods of time. As an elementary school student, you also looked forward to boring assemblies when you could at least sit for an hour

instead of standing around in gym class.

But still, if you are willing to commit, balancing on two feet is an option. And there’s always the desk for support.

Next, there is the body pillow option. Visit your local Bed, Bath and Beyond and purchase two fulllength body pillows.

Then, place your twin mattress on the f loor, and sandwich it between the two body pillows. This will provide a broader surface for surf boarding and – drumroll – you can’t fall off. You can only roll into a new position.

But but but V, I can’t afford to buy pillows – I’m not one of those rich kids from California.

Have no fear, V is here to steer (not physically).

Instead, next time you head to the heavy-petting haven, put the bed on the f loor, and then stick your bed pads and pillows next to it.

This also works as extra cushion for the pushin’, but is not plagued by the plights of poverty.

Other helpful tips include: putting the bed against the wall, investing in a futon that can slide out, going for a power hour in the shower and getting a sleeping bag that unzips.

If you find any more helpful tips, please Tweet them at me (@dear_v), so I can share them with the world and promote proper passion.

V

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