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SwigChill The strangely narcotic, often unpleasant effects of anti-energy drinks p9

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january 5-12, 2011 SANTACRUZ.COM

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Contents. P OSTS

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CURRENTS

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COVER STORY

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S TA G E , A R T & EVENTS

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B E AT S C A P E CLUB GRID FILM

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ASTR OLOGY

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CLASSIFIEDS

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ON THE COVER Photograph by Sara Sanger

115 Cooper St, Santa Cruz, CA 95060 831.457.9000 (phone) 831.457.5828 (fax) 831.457.8500 (classified) SCW@santacruz.com Santa Cruz Weekly, incorporating Metro Santa Cruz, is available free of charge, limited to one copy per reader. Additional copies of the current issue of Santa Cruz Weekly may be purchased for $1, payable at the Santa Cruz Weekly office in advance. Santa Cruz Weekly may be distributed only by Santa Cruz Weekly’s authorized distributors. No person may, without permission of Metro Publishing, Inc., take more than one copy of each Santa Cruz Weekly issue. Subscriptions: $65/six months, $125/one year. Entire contents Š 2011 Metro Publishing, Inc. All rights reserved. Reproduction in any form prohibited without publisher’s written permission. Unsolicited material should be accompanied by a stamped, self-addressed envelope; Santa Cruz Weekly is not responsible for the return of such submissions.

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Posts. P o ts os t. Messages M eessaggees &

327B=@7/: 327B = =@7/: EDITOR E D I TO R B@/17 6C97:: B@/ 17 6C97:: 6

(thukill@santacruzweekly.com) (thukill@sant tacruzw a eeekly.com) STAFF STA AFF WRITERS WR RITERS B3AA/ ABC/@B B3AA/ ABC/@B (tstuart@santacruzweekly.com) (tstuart@sant tacruzw a eeekly.com) @716/@2 D=< 0CA/19 @ 716/@2 D=< 0C CA/19 (richard@santacruzweekly.com) (richar rd@santtaacruzweeekly.com m) CONTRIBUTING C ONTRIBUTING EDIT E EDITOR OR 16 @7AB7</ E/B3@A 16@7AB7</ E/B3@A POETRY PO ETR RY E EDITOR DITOR @ @=03@B AE/@2 =03@B AE/@2 E EDITORIAL DITORIAL INTERN IN NTERN 9/B3 8/1=0A=< 9/B3 8/1=0A=< C CONTRIBUTORS ONTRIB BUTORS @=0 0@3HA<G @ =0 0@3HA<G

Send letters letteerrs to to Santa Santa Cruz Weekly, Weekly e y, let letters@santacruz.com teerrss@san nttaacruz.com or to to A Attn: ttn: LLetters, eett et ttteeerrs, 115 Co C Cooper ooper e St., Sant San Santaa Cruz, uz 95060. 060. Inclu Include udee cit city ittyy and phone phone numb er or email address. address. Submissions Subm missions mayy be be edit teed ffor oorr length, length cl le leng laritt y or or ffactual ac actual a inac a curacies racies know nown ttoo us s. number edited clarity inaccuracies known us.

3CB6/</A7/ =@ 3CB6/</A7/ =@ 3C>63;7A;3C >63;7A A;IN H IN HIS IS rresponse esponse tto oK Kelly elly L Luker’s uker’s rrecent ecent p photos hotos al-Cruz H atcherry chicks b eing dump ed of C Cal-Cruz Hatchery being dumped at the Buena Buena Vista Vist i a landfill laandff iill (“On (“On Eggshells, Eggshells,� Currents, D ec. 115), 5), Cal-Cruz Cal-Cruz H atchery Currents, Dec. Hatchery president B rian C olllins is quoted as ha avving president Brian Collins having said, ““There’s Th here’s n othing iin n tthere here tthat hat h asn’t said, nothing hasn’t been euthanized pr o erlyy.� H op been properly. Hee is also quoted as having having said, said, “Unfortunately, “Unfortunately, just just like like with with as anything else, else, you you get get desensitized desensitized to to what what anything yo ou do. do.� you The concept concept of of people people euthanizing euthanizing animals animals The while being being desensitized desensitized to to what what they they are are while ontradicttion in terms doing is a ccontradiction terms.. MerriamWebster’s Collegiate Collegiate Dictionary Dictionary defines def ines Webster’s

euthanasia as “the “the act or practice pracctice of killing or p ermitting the death of ho opelessly sick or permitting hopelessly iinjured njured iindividuals ndividuals ((as as p persons ersons o orr d domestic omestic painless way animals) in a rrelatively elatively painle ess w ay ffor or o rreasons easons o off m mercy. ercy.� W Where here iiss tthere here m mercy ercy iin n aan n become act to which one has b ecome desensitized? Itt iiss aabsurd people bsurd tto o ssuppose uppose tthat hat p eople animalss ccare desensitized to killing animal are whether kill die painless tthe he aanimals nimals tthey hey k ill d ie rrelatively elatively p ainless deaths.. A p person bee mer merciful deaths erson ccannot annot b m ciful and nonmerciful, nonmer ciful, sensitized and desensitized, d in tthe he sselfsame elfsame aact. ct. W hen I h ear M r. C ollins When hear Mr. Collins d escribe a rroutine outine dump-truck dump-truck lload oad o is describe off h his so -called un nviable v chicks as “euthanized “eeuthanized so-called unviable pr operlyy,� I don ’t hear euthan nasia. I hear properly, don’t euthanasia. euphemism. David N N.. Ev Evans, anss, SSanta Sant ta Cruz C

From Fr F room m the W Web eeb 0=G1=BB /<2 0=G1=BB /<2 B6@7D3 B 6@7D3 @ IQ QUESTION UESTIO T N whether only ““the the sicklyy or injur red bir ds ar a injured birds aree humanely killed and dump ed d at the landf ill.� One One of the pr rinciple dumped landfill.� principle function ns of a hatcher ne functions hatcheryy is to determin determine the gen gender der of the chicks and destr destroy oy th the he male bir rds which ha ave no use in anim mal birds have animal agricult ture. T hey ccannot annot la ay eggs and don ’t agriculture. They lay don’t mak ood “br oilers.� It It is important important to t note makee go good “broilers.� this pra actice must o ccur whether cconsumers onssumers practice occur pur chasse “c age-free� or simply raise th heir own purchase “cage-free� their chick en ns. IItt is an unac ceptable le vel off cruelt chickens. unacceptable level crueltyy and p eo ople ccan an easily thriv e to people thrivee without eggs b oycott it. boycott Keegan K eeegan

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/@B /@B / >@=2C1 1B7=< >@=2C1B7=< DESIGN D ESIGN D DIRECTOR I R E C TO R 9/@/ 0@=E< 9/@/ 0@= 0 E< PRODUCTION P RODUCTION D DIRECTOR IR RECTOR 6/@@G /::7A=< 6/@@G /::7A=< : GRAPHIC DESIGNER G RAPHIC D ESIGNER B/07 H/@@7<<//: B/07 H/@@7< <<//:

63 A33A B63; 63 A33A B63; E63< B63G¸@3 E 63< B63G¸@3 >33>7<5 >33 3>7<5 PEOPLE PEOPLE E have haave sear seared ed cconsciences onsciences and think about ab out these th hese animals as ““thingsâ€? thingsâ€? to throw throw theyy please please.. Someda Someday God, aaway way orr to do as the ay G od, d hass ccompassion His animals, who ha ompassion on all of H is anim mals, hold accountable creature will hol ld us ac countable ffor or eevery o very cr eaature People ((Hebrews Hebrews w 4:13). P eople need to know the t behind chicken theyy put in their truth b e ehind the chick en the t mouths. Greed alivee and well. mouths s. G reed is aliv Jan J aan Fr Fredericks, reederickss, God’s Creatures Ministry God’’s Cr reatur e rees Minist tr y

EDITORIAL EDITORIAL PRODUCTION P RO D U C T I O N A3/< 53=@53 A3/< 53 3=@53 AD AD DESIGNERS DESIGNERS 83<<G =/B3G 83<<G =/B3G G 27/<</ D/<3G193 27/<</ D/ /<3G193

27A>:/G /2D3@B7A7<5 27A>:/ /G /2D3@B77A7<5 ACCOUNT A CCOUNT EXECUTIVES EXECU UTIVES /:713 1=:0G / :713 1=:0G (alic (alice@santacruz.com) e@santtaacruz.com) 8=13: 8=13:G< ;/1<37: :G< G ;/ /1<37: (jocelyn@santacruz.com) (jocelyn@santtac a ruz.com) 77:/</ @/C16 >/193@ :/</ @/C16 >/193@ (ilana@santacruz.com) (il (ilana@sant @ tac a ruz.com))

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A/<B/ @3A>=<2A A /< <B/ / @3A>=<2A DEAR D EAR Kate: K Si Sinc Sincee you you rreferred effeerred d to me b byy my my (“The Old Cover name (“ “The JJolly olly O ld Saint Trick,� Trrick,�� C over story, Dec. story, D ec. 22), I thought I’d I’d ccomment. ommentt. My lega legal Santaa Claus, al name is Sant Claus, and I’m I’m ma consecrated Christian monk, consecrated bishop and C hristian mon nk, as St. N Nicholas was manyy ccenturies ago.. I b believe holas w as man enturies ago elieve ich Christmas the birth that C h hristmas is the ccelebration elebration of th he bir th Christ, crass,, ccommercial, secular of C hrisst, not the crass ommercial, se ecular spectacle become manyy plac places, sp ectaclle it has b ecome in man e , and es greatest gift givee is lo love, that thee gr eatest gif ft one ccan an giv ove, not presents. pr esents. I ser serve advocate the ve as a vvolunteer olunteer adv ocate ffor or th o he million children U.S. 2 millio on childr en in the U .S. annuallyy who aree abus abused, abandoned, doned, ar sed, neglected, eexploited, xploited, aban homeless through homele ess and institutionalized thr ouggh no fault of their own. Blessings Blessings to all, Santa San nta Claus

SANTACRUZ.COM

january 5-12, 2011

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january 5-12, 2011 SANTACRUZ.COM

Currents. C urrent n s. AB719G A7BC/B AB719G A7BC/B7=< B7=< < Go Gov. v. J Jerry eerrr y Br Brown own ttook ook off office f iice Monday M of the st state ate his pr predecessor edecesssor pr pronounced onounced ‘ungo ‘ungovernable.’ vernable.’

Brown’s Br own’ w s Cho Choice oice How big is How i the ne new w ggovernor overnor willing tto o think? 0G B=; 6/G23< 0G B= ; 6 /G 2 3 <

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RECENTLY RECENTL LY ask asked ked dm myy friend fi d defense attorney Angela Oh, def fense e at torney and Buddhist priest, what B uddhist p riest, w hat sshe he tthought hought ab about out the k karma arm ma of JJerry erry Br Brown. own. S he p aused ffor or o nly a m oment. ““His His She paused only moment. karma, k arma,� sshe he rreplied, eplied, ““is is tto o iinherit nherit tthe he ccollapse ollapse o off sso om many any iinstitutions nstitutions h his is father built.� Infrastru Infrastructure ucture dec decay. ay. Traf Traffic ff ic ccongestion ongestion and dp pollution. ollution. Water More prison sshortages. hortages. M ore p rison iinmates nmates tthan han st state ate univ university ersity studen students. nts. S Since ince B Brown rown rrebelled ebelled aagainst gainst h his is ffather’s ather’s llegacy egacy d during uring h his is ““small small iiss b beautiful� eautiful� p phase, hase, iit’s t’s ttempting empting tto o aaccept ccept Oh’s But O h’s aanalysis. nalysis. B ut tthere here aare re sseveral everal dif differences ffeerences this time time.. First, booming off P Pat F irst, tthe he b ooming rrevenues evenues o at B Brown’s rown’s eera ra aaren’t ren’t likely likely tto o rreturn eturn

anytime ssoon. anytime oon. T The he current current deficit def icit California eestimates stimates ffor or C alifornia rrange ange iin n tthe he to $28 billion range range,, our $20 billion b debt has h doubled in seven seven yyears eears and our ccredit redit rrating ating iiss tthe he w orst of of tthe he h eavily worst heavily populated opu prophecy opheecy p ulated states. states. Brown’s Brown’s old pr of a ccoming oming “era of limits� has come comee true true.. Thee sec second ond dif difference ffeerence is that our productive p roductive iindustrial ndustrial eeconomy conomy h has as b been een outsourced orr aautomated. Brown’s eeither ither o utsourced o utomated. B rown’s ccentral entraal pledge to build a mor moree ener energygyeefficient ff icient eeconomy conomy w with ith 5500,000 00,000 ggreen reen jobs will w b bee incr incredibly edibly dif difficult ff iicult to fu fund. und. F Furthermore, urthermore, ssome ome o off tthe he historic own h istoric sstate tate ccrises rises aare re Brown’s Brown’s o wn rresponsibility, esponsibility, n not ot tthe he llegacy egacy o off h his is off ffather. ather. Brown’s Brown’s iimplementation mplementation o Proposition P roposition 1133 b byy sspending pending tthe he sstate’s tate’s

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surplus ccreated surplus reated aan n iillusion llusion tthat hat tthere here w as n o rrevenue evenue ccrisis. risis. A nd h is h ard-line was no And his hard-line philosophy, aanti-crime nti-crime p hilosophy, beginning beginning with with h is ssupport upport ffor or mandatory mandatory m inimum his minimum sentencing in 1975, eeventually ventually rresulted esulted iin n a prison prison gulag gulag o 50,000 iinmates nmates off 1150,000 more ccosting osting m ore ttax ax dollars dollars tthan han tthe he sstate tate univ ersity ssystem. ystem. university Finally, has Finally, tthe he sstate’s tate’s ffinancial inancial ccrisis risis h as b een iinflamed nf lamed b emocrats. T wo-thirds been byy D Democrats. Two-thirds shortfall of the structural sho ortfall is due to ttax ax ccuts uts eenacted nacted b he sstate tate Legislature Legislature byy tthe during past d uring tthe he p ast 1155 yyears, ears, aaccording ccording tto o tthe he C alifornia Budget Budget P roject. R ecent California Project. Recent breaks, source says, ccorporate orporate ttax ax br eak ks, the sour ce sa ayys, wer “largely back ed b s.� In other weree “largely backed byy D’ D’s. words: Brown’s party. wor ds: Br own’s par ty. To credit, Brown been To his cr edit, Br ow wn has b een holding meetings on ttelevised elevised tteach-ins each-ins aand nd ttown own m eetings o n budget quandary. UCLA tthe he b udget q uandary ry. At At a U CLA fforum orum on his message will o n Dec. Dec. 114, 4, h is m essage tthat hat tthere here w ill be deep proposed his budget d eep ccuts uts p roposed iin nh is January Jaanuary b udget was longtime frugality. w as cconsistent gtime t frugalit y. onsistent with his long wants fairness. But he also w ants fa airness. Remember, Rememb e er, Brown has Catholic B rown h as a C atholic ssensibility ensibility tthat hat on privilege ffrowns rowns o np rivilege and and ostentatious ostentatious who most sstrutting. trutting. ““Those Th hose w ho aare re tthe he m ost privileged back p rivileged have have to to lead� lead� in in cutting cutting b ack budgets perks, hee ssaid, noting hee b udgets aand nd pe rks, h aid, n oting tthat hat h was his own w as ccutting utting h is o wn office offf ice eexpenditures xpenditures byy 2 20 percent. minutes hee b 0 pe rcent. A ffew ew m inutes llater, ater, h upped 255 p percent more. upp ed that ffigure iigure to o2 ercent or mor e. “Theree ar aree limits to inequalit inequality, “Ther y,� he added, because social fabric..� b ecause “it tears at the t so cial fabric In December, Brown In eearly arly D ecember, I aasked sked B rown Steve Glazer when wee m might sspokesman pokesman S teve G lazer w hen w ight hear more h ear m ore about about his his vague vague ccampaign ampaign promise without p romise tto o ““not not rraise aise ttaxes axes w ithout a Glazer only vvote ote of of the the people. people.� G lazer ssaid aid o nly tthat hat Brown’s current educate Br own’s cu ow curr eentt plan plaaan is to educ p ate tthee on magnitude off sstakeholders takeholders o n tthe he ttrue rue m agnitude o tthe he budget budget ccrisis, risis, and and to to propose propose ccuts uts iin n services ser vices in early JJanuary. Don’t get ahead anuary. Don’t of the story, story, he cautioned. cauttioned.

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with n with no o rreview eview o off w whether hether tthey hey ccreate reate ec o onomic beneff its i . He could could call call for fo or economic benefits. rreinstatement ein nstatement of the top inc income ome ttax a ax b racket u nder R onald R eagan, w hich bracket under Ronald Reagan, which might m ight n net et $ $33 b billion illion tto o$ $4 4b billion illion ann nuallyy. He ccould ould rremind emind Californians Califfo orrnians annually. that Proposition was tha at Pr oposition 13 w as meant for for o hom meowners, not as a bonanza bonanza for fo orr bankbank khomeowners, merger me erger con con men. men Such a populist populist agenda a mig ght pass the L egislature and win n vvoter oter might Legislature approval app provval where where needed. Orr h hee could O could get get tough tough with with the the universities, u niversities, demanding demanding greater greater oversight oversight educating and d educ ating the public on the lavish laavish v six-figure six-ff igur i e administrative administrative salaries and nd an perks p errks while students still struggle to ffind ind classes classes small small enough enough in in which which to to bee seen b seen and and heard. heard. And And assuming assuming that that tthe he governor governor genuinely genuinely believes believes his his call call ffor o or “shared “shared sacrifice, sacriff iice,� he will have haave to rereeexamine xaamine his role role in the mind-boggling mind-bogggling pris son buildup of the past three three decades. d ades. dec prison The T he sshadows hadows of of the the past past hang hang heavy heavy over o ver Jerry Jerry Brown, Brown, but but he he is is capable capable off reflecting o ref lecting and and reinventing. reinventing. Here Here iiss my my suggestion: suggestion: He He should should develop develop a California Califfo ornia Quality Quality of Life Liffe Index. Index.. Choose C hoose 10 10 (or (or 20 20 or or 30) 30) quality-of-life quality-of-life measures me easures that already already exist. exist. We We know, kn now, ffor or o example, example l , that th t California Calif liffo ornia i stands sttand d dead ds d d llast ast in in the the ratio ratio of of librarians librarians to to students students nationwide. n ationwide. We We are are 23rd 23rd in in per-pupil per-pupil spending on public schoolchildren. sp e ending schoolchildren n. Add Add aanother nother few few categories categories and and include include them them in an a annual address address by by the governor. goverrnor. Send S end the the Quality Quality of of Life Life Report Report aand nd recommendations recommendations to to legislative legislative ccommittees ommittees for for review review and and action. action. This This would wo ould be be a process process pushing us toward tow ward ourr chosen ou c ose ideals. ideals dea s. IIt’s It t’s ttime ime for for Jerry Jerry Brown Brown to to begin begin making m aking our our institutions institutions accountable accountable ffor or o our quality quality of life liffe more more than our o quantity qua antity of things. things.

Read R eeaad this piec piece ce in n full f at www www.santacruz.com/news. w..santtaacruz.com/ne o ws. T SOME POINT POINT, T, Brown Brown ccould ould llaunch aunch a p opulist populist ampaign ccampaign n aagainst gainst tthe he ON THE BEACH iinstitutionalized nstitutionalized greed greed aand nd avarice avarice that that have have On the Beach iss a report reeport from from Save Save Our Shores Shores thatt rripped ipped o pen $ 19 b illion in in open $19 billion appears week app earrs the ffirst ir irsst w eek of each month aannual nnual ttax ax loopholes loopholes from from egislatture. a supplic ant L supplicant Legislature. He could could point point out that t Pounds P oounds of ttrash rrash collected collectteed bbyy Save Save Our Shor Shores res e fr from rom o bbeach eachh ttax ax breaks breaks h ave a w ay o have way off (26,000) and river riverr (32,000) cleanups since since January Januar a ry 2009. 20 009. b ecoming p ermanen nt, becoming permanent,

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One writer’s immersion in the mystifying world of anti-energy drinks

Drink Up, Power Down

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HE OVERHEAD light is buzzing, and so are the inhabitants of the living room. Pencils, dice and character sheets are strewn everywhere. How long have my friends and I been playing this game of Dungeons and Dragons? Eight hours? Ten? A collection of slain Red Bulls, Rockstars and Monster drinks adds to the increasing body count of goblins, skeletons and giant spiders, and as the quest continues, the dungeon master cracks open yet another energy drink. While this scene may seem a little desperate (and embarrassingly geeky), my friends are not alone in excessive energy-drink consumption. In the last decade, energy drinks have firmly wedged their way into our lives, with regular old caffeine and its regular old buzz taking a back seat to ingredients like taurine, acai and ginseng—and in the case of the original Sparks (RIP) and its next-generation spin-off, Four Loko (soon to be pulled from shelves nationwide), good ol’ devil alcohol. Though the majority of the market share of energy drinks consists of only a handful of varieties, the market experienced growth of 240 percent between 2004 and 2009. According to the Nutrition Business Journal, energy shot sales reached $560 million in 2008. That’s a lot of tiny bottles. ¨

january 5-12, 2011 SANTACRUZ.COM

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1 = D 3 @ A B = @ G j 2 @ 7 < 9 C > > = E 3 @ 2 = E < I have not been immune to this trend. Cheaper and far easier to acquire than, say, methamphetamine, energy drinks are more than able to provide that extra, sometimes much-needed boost a girl seeks. But what about the aftereffects, when stress is sky-high and it’s impossible to relax? Or those endless nights when the clock is ticking the hours away, but the brain is still going at warp speed? Dear readers, a solution has emerged that is fast making its way into the mainstream. Behold the anti-energy drink. This budding microindustry, not unlike its energetic predecessor, features eye-catching logos, bullet-style cans and names like iChill and Dream Water. And while these magic, soporific potions may have different ingredients and ad campaigns from each other, they all make essentially the same claims: a feeling of relaxation, an increase in concentration, a reduction of stress and even a good night’s sleep. While their composition may vary slightly, the majority of relaxation drinks contain at least one of a select few ingredients. Gamma-aminobutyric acid (otherwise known as GABA, not to be confused with GHB) is a neurotransmitter that regulates neuroexcitability throughout the nervous system. And 5-HTP, or 5hydroxytryptophan, is a naturally occurring amino acid sold over the counter as a sleep aid, antidepressant or appetite suppressant. Valerian, a perennial with pink flowers, is used to treat insomnia— it’s what the doctor in Fight Club recommends to Edward Norton’s character to help him sleep at night—and kava roots possess mild sedative properties and are traditionally consumed by Pacific Island cultures. Finally, melatonin is a hormone that may aid sleep but is not to be messed with carelessly. With so many ingredients and effects, I decided to get to the bottom of this anti-energy-drink thing. Were any of them truly effective? Relaxing? Stomachable? Determined to find out, I scouted as many as I could find, hopped on that crazy melatonin train and drank it all the way to the end of the line.

You’re Getting Sleepy My inaugural drink in this experiment is a beverage called Neuro Sleep. Suspended in a sleek orange bottle, it looks more like a lava lamp than a consumable beverage. According

to Neuro Sleep’s website, the drink’s specific combination of melatonin and magnesium “work together to aid in healthy sleep quality and normalize the circadian rhythm.â€? Sounds scientific, right? Feeling a little like Alice in Wonderland as I down the bottle, I’m expecting it to have that familiar vaguely chemical taste of the typical energy drink, a delicate bouquet of citrus and pomegranate with hints of children’s Tylenol. I am pleasantly surprised. Neuro Sleep’s flavor harks back to the “orange-drinkâ€? memories of childhood, somewhere between Tang and Gatorade with a bit of a chalky aftertaste. My initial reaction after downing the bottle is a slight headache, though admittedly it’s probably nothing more than a standard, run-of-the-mill brain freeze. After a while, what can only be described as a warm, fuzzy feeling kicks in, bringing a lazy smile to my face and even goose bumps to my arms. Forty-five minutes later, after a hot shower, I am left with a feeling of relaxation but a trace of nausea and a headache that still won’t subside. The end result isn’t much different than the crash after a few beers or a large Long Island iced tea. While I’m undoubtedly experiencing a mildly relaxing experience, on the whole, it’s also mildly disappointing. Next on the list is Jones Gaba, from the makers of those delightful, brightly colored Jones sodas. Each 12-ounce can of Jones Gaba contains an entire 150 milligrams of the intimidatingly named gamma-aminobutyric acid. While not so much a sleep aid as a relaxation and concentration aid, Jones Gaba promises “focus and clarityâ€? in each obnoxiously energy-drink-sized can. This so-called juice-tea comes in four different flavors: lemon-honey, grapefruit, nectarine and Fuji apple, all of which sound at least slightly unappealing, especially considering I’ve never been a big fan of tea to begin with. But this isn’t about a pleasant taste. That became my mantra, in fact: “It’s about the effects,â€? I chant, as I struggle to finish that 12-ounce can. Upon first opening the can, the drink itself smells strongly and very apple-y, like a Jolly Rancher. The taste is more like watered-down apple juice with a distinctive tealike f lavor. Again, allow me to reiterate that I am not a big tea drinker. Tea makes me gag and always has. Jones Gaba is technically classified as a tea-juice, contains white tea, and, ¨ !

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1 = D 3 @ A B = @ G j 2 @ 7 < 9 C > > = E 3 @ 2 = E < dear Lord, it is no exception. It does manage to give me a fuzzyheaded feeling of relaxation, though, but not exactly what I would describe as “focus� or “clarity.� And while it does make me want to take a nap, I decide to fight the urge to succumb to sleep and indulge in some creative pursuits instead. I have an art project that I’ve been neglecting for a while, and this seems like the perfect opportunity to work on it. After all, creativity and substance abuse go hand in hand, right?

As the elixir begins to take effect I find myself, still in my nightgown, curled up on my bathroom floor, poring over a sample ballot and marveling at what a lovely name Meg Whitman really is. Maybe not. Rather than bursting with inspiration, my project that is supposed to consist of illustrations of people and cats ends up with the people looking a little cubist (but not in the good, Picasso-esque way) and with one of the cats wearing shoes. Ugh. So much for heavy machinery. It seems I can’t even operate a mechanical pencil under the influence of this stuff.

Floored Dream Water ensures users that its ingredients will lull them to sleep and lead to a more refreshed state the next day. On the whole, I find the idea of a good night’s sleep without feeling like a groggy zombie the next day very

appealing. But for my Dream Water trial, I decide to try a bit of an unorthodox, wake-and-bake-style approach. Rather than drinking it right before bed, I drink it first thing in the morning and plan to spend the entire day fighting off its effects, like a character in a Nightmare on Elm Street movie. One, two, Dream Water’s coming for you. While still in my flannel nightgown and bathrobe, I throw back the 2.5ounce shot of snoozeberry-flavored Dream Water and wait for it to kick in. Snoozeberry, it turns out, is not merely a bastardization of Willy Wonka’s “snozzberry� flavor, but a combination of blueberry and pomegranate. The scent is light and subtle, but the flavor is gag-inducingly sweet. The snoozeberries taste like snoozeberries. The bottle’s warning label cautions me not to drive, operate heavy machinery or do “other important tasks� while under the influence of Dream Water. Voting doesn’t count as an important task, right? Under the influence or not, it’s business as usual on Election Day, but as the elixir begins to take effect, it suddenly occurs to me that I haven’t read up on any of the candidates or propositions and have no idea how to vote. It’s then that I find myself, still in my nightgown, curled up on my bathroom floor, poring over a sample ballot and marveling at what a lovely name Meg Whitman really is. Lucky for me, the polling place is only a few blocks from my house, so I’m able to zigzag down the sidewalk and do my civic duty. I am determined to vote for the right candidates, and am not swayed by my doped-up fascination with the name Meg Whitman (like some glorious combination of Leaves of Grass and Little Women). After I get home from voting, I think I eat lunch, but I honestly have no idea. Around 4pm, my eyelids are getting too heavy to fight. I decide to take a quick power nap to wake up feeling “refreshed and energized.� The next thing I know, the room is totally dark and I’m struggling to sit up and squint at the numbers on my alarm clock, which read 7:39pm. What the hell?

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Chillin’ and Illin’ If I thought my experiences thus far were unpleasant, they were only teasers for the main event: Aimee vs. iChill. Monday night finds me staying up way past my bedtime and completely wired. Knowing I need to get to sleep so I can be up early the following morning, now ¨ #

Our specialists’ promise: Your pet will receive the most complete, safe, compassionate and individual care. For more information about board certiďŹ ed specialists, contact your regular veterinarian and visit our website

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1 = D 3 @ A B = @ G j 2 @ 7 < 9 C > > = E 3 @ 2 = E < seems like the perfect opportunity to put one of these drinks to the use for which it was actually meant. According to iChill’s website, it is the world’s first relaxation shot—a dubious honor at best. Its unique blend of melatonin, valerian root and rose hips promises to “help calm the body and mind at the end of a stressful day.� Perfect. Just what I need on this frazzled night. The flavor is called Blissful Berry, and while the scent is most certainly berry, the taste is what can only be described as horrific. It’s sickly sweet berry, but also something else. Something that tastes the way bug spray smells. Just drinking the two-ounce bottle is difficult, like swallowing some terrible green cough syrup that burns the throat and makes the eyes water. Like every other relaxation drink I’ve tried, iChill starts off by giving me a slight headache and a trace of nausea. Similar to my Neuro Sleep trial, I figure I’ll take a shower and be fully ready for bed by the time the drink takes effect. But the shower actually makes the nausea worse, until I’m doubled over and praying to the relaxation-drink gods that I won’t throw up. If that mix of berry and bug spray was bad going down, it would surely be worse coming back up. As luck would have it, I keep my composure and am able to stagger back to my bedroom where I spend the next half an hour lying in bed, listening to my pulse pounding in my ears, feeling the room spinning around me and wondering about the strange pain in my chest. Somewhere in the midst of all this, I am miraculously able to fall asleep. Needless to say, this will be the first and last time the wretched substance known as iChill will pass through these lips. The more of these drinks I sample, the worse they get, and the more I feel like I’m slowly poisoning myself. After trying several containing melatonin, I decide to switch things up and try one emphasizing kava. RZO looks deceptively like an ordinary energy drink: the black 10.5-ounce can is emblazoned with the name of the drink in bright-blue graffiti-style letters, and a small disclaimer at the bottom of the can warns consumers not to drive or operate equipment while taking the product. I’m excited about this one, because according to its website, it’s nothing but orange juice and kava root extract—kind of like a screwdriver, only better. Surely there’ll be no awful chemical taste with this one. Alas. While the taste isn’t exactly chemical, it is most certainly awful. My first thought upon opening the can

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and sniffing the contents is that it has somehow gone bad. Does a canned drink have the ability to go bad? Even holding my nose, squeezing my eyes shut and just chugging isn’t enough to make the liquid nightmare palatable. After getting through about half the can, I promise myself I’ll finish it later and stash it in my fridge. Luckily, I never have the chance. Sometime within the next 24 hours, one of my poor, pitiable housemates drinks the last of my RZO. I take it as a sign. The anti-energy experiment has reached its end.

Thanks But No Thanks Even after all my research, I still cannot figure out why these products exist in the first place. Sure, relaxation and a good night’s sleep are great, but do they really need to be marketed in liquid form? Are energy-drink junkies so far gone that they need to detox with a similar-looking bottle? Perhaps someone simply realized that with the success of energy drinks, an opposite product might result in some backlash profit. The free market abhors a vacuum, after all. I’m beginning to suspect that any drink that promises a good night’s sleep is just as ridiculous as a drink that promises an energy boost or weight loss or a cure for erectile dysfunction. Maybe it works, but probably it’s too good to be true. The drinks I’ve tried have been effective, there’s no doubt about that, but the unpleasant tastes and sometimes scary side effects simply aren’t worth it. As for me, I’ll stick with an extra large helping of Tylenol PM. 0

$ j AB/53 /@B 3D3<BA january 5-12, 2011 A/<B/1@CH 1=; :7AB G=C@ :=1/: 3D3<B 7< B63 1/:3<2/@ Email it to calendar@santacruz.com, fax it to 831.457.5828, or drop it by our office. Events need to be received a week prior to publication and placement cannot be guaranteed.

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4C<5CA 4/7@ Experts will be on hand at the 37th Annual Fungus Fair to give shi-talkies on shroom identification and best foraging practices, plus lectures on the medicinal properties and culinary uses of mushrooms (courtesy of local chefs Jozseph Schultz of India Joze and Damani Thomas of Oswald), along with fungus arts and crafts and hands-on activities for the kids. Friday, Jan. 7, 4–7pm; Saturday–Sunday, Jan. 8–9, 10am-5pm. Tickets $5–$7. Louden Nelson Community Center, 301 Center St., Santa Cruz; 831.684.2275.

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8=</B6/< 4@/<H3< Franzen, who recently graced the cover of Time magazine with a glossy portrait captioned “Great American Novelist,� will read and sign copies of his newest release, Freedom. The author, a part-time local, wrote roughly half of the novel, which topped many a “best-of � list this year, in Santa Cruz. This is a Bookshop Santa Cruz author event. Thursday, Jan. 6, 7pm. Santa Cruz High School, 415 Walnut Ave., Santa Cruz. Tickets are $8 at Bookshop Santa Cruz; 831.423.0900. 6 HVXgZY 9jin ^h V YdXjbZciVgn [ZVijg^c\ ^ciZgk^Zlh l^i] gVWW^h! ?Zl^h] hX^Zci^hih! >hgVZa^ Zck^gdcbZciVa^hih VcY VXi^k^hih Y^hXjhh^c\ i]Z Yjin id Veean ?Zl^h] iZVX]^c\h id dWiV^c^c\ [ddY! jh^c\ cVijgVa gZhdjgXZh! egdiZXi^c\ Vc^bVah VcY i]Z Zck^gdcbZci# 6 kZ\Vc ediajX` l^aa egZXZYZ i]Z [^ab VcY V Y^hXjhh^dc l^i] GVWW^ EVjaV BVgXjh l^aa [daadl# I]j! ?Vc +! +eb# ;gZZ# EaZVhZ GHKE# IZbeaZ 7Zi] :a! (%** EdgiZg <jaX] GY! 6eidh! -(&#((*#(()'#

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I ALWAYS LOVED winter holidays because Dad would take us somewhere we’d never been to do something we’d never done. Wherever we found ourselves, we’d go to a museum. We went to museums of art, history and science to learn about ships, neon and archaeology; we visited raisin museums, roadside museums— what vivid worlds we explored! This holiday I was happy to see so many families keeping the same traditions. The lively “Toy Trainsâ€? exhibit at the Santa Cruz Museum of Art & History was a fine way to bring families through the doors to see the excellent “Association of Clay and Glass Artists of Californiaâ€? exhibition (which officially opens with a reception this Friday). The trains are tucked away now, but children can still delight in the color, whimsy and accessibility of the ceramic and glass art. Parents can explain just how the art is made, thanks to numerous informative text panels. Families were well represented among the masses at San Francisco’s de Young Museum to see the “Post Impressionist Masterpieces from the MusĂŠe d’Orsayâ€? (through Jan. 18). This cleverly edited visit with D/< 5=56, 5/C5C7< 13H/<<3, @=CAA3/C and others shows these artists with their contemporaries in a highly compressed space. This blockbuster requires purchasing tickets for a specific time period (best in advance), then shuffling past the artwork in crowds two deep without time to pause, discuss or reflect. With so little opportunity to engage, I’d rather take kids to the museum’s African Art or Art of the Americas exhibitions, which offer springboards for discussion of the constancy of the human condition regardless of time and place. Alternatively, the neighboring California Academy of Sciences is designed interactively with kids in mind. In Los Angeles, the Museum of Contemporary Art on Grand Avenue is a favorite stop. On this trip I would go there just to sit quietly in a basketball court-size room of @=B69=A and remember a conversation with my daughter when she was little about how Rothko made us feel. MOCA offers an effortless, elucidating walk through the development of contemporary art. Tours are available daily by docents who seem trained to engage a wide range of ages and backgrounds. Not far uptown is the Los Angeles County Museum of Art, the largest museum in the western United States: a network of awkwardly connected buildings housing historic and contemporary art of all cultures as well as a children’s gallery. This time I chose the Broad Contemporary Art Museum, a playground where 8344 9==<A reigns supreme. Next door, “Olmec: Colossal Masterworks of Ancient Mexicoâ€? shows monumental sculpture from Mexico’s Gulf Coast created in the same era as the Valley of the Kings in Egypt. Culture: There’s a lot to talk about. Read more of The Exhibitionist at KUSPorg/exhibitionist. (Maureen Davidson) B63 3F6707B7=<7AB 7A 4C<232 7< >/@B 0G / 5@/<B 4@=; B63 1C:BC@/: 1=C<17: =4 A/<B/ 1@CH 1=C<BG

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Jazz Presenters since 1975

MONDAY, JANUARY 10 • 7 & 9 PM 2011 GRAMMY NOMINEE “BEST LATIN JAZZâ€?

PONCHO SANCHEZ LATIN JAZZ BAND

$25/Adv $28/Door, No Jazztix or Comps Sponsored by Radiology Medical Group

THURSDAY, JANUARY 13 • 7 PM High energy improvisation music with jazz, rock, and blues roots influences

ERIK TELFORD COLLECTIVE $12/Adv $15/Door Jazz & Dinner: $24.60/Adv

FRIDAY, JANUARY 14 • 7 & 9 PM Two master musicians!

DAVID GRISMAN/ MARTIN TAYLOR DUO

$25/Adv $28/Door, No Jazztix or Comps MONDAY, JANUARY 17 • 7 PM

RUDDER

Progressive and fresh voice to hit the music scene since Medeski, Martin and Wood and The Bad Plus $20/Adv $23/Door 1/2 Price Night for Students. Tickets at the door with valid I.D. THURSDAY, JANUARY 20 • 7 PM

JESSE SCHEININ BAND

WITH SPECIAL GUEST BEN FLOCKS $12/Adv $15/Door Jazz & Dinner: $24.60/Adv MONDAY, JANUARY 24 • 7 & 9 PM NEA JAZZ MASTER

BOBBY HUTCHERSON QUARTET 7 pm:$25/Adv $28/Door 9 pm: $20/Adv $23/Door, No Jazztix or Comps

Sponsored by Kyle Goldman Supported in part by the National Endowment for the Arts

SUPPORT JAZZ EDUCATION TUESDAY, JANUARY 25 • 6 – 9 PM EAT, DRINK & BE MERRY! DINE AT SHADOWBROOK & LISTEN TO THE KUUMBWA JAZZ HONOR BAND 1/3rd of all proceeds support Jazz Education Call Shadowbrook for reservations: 475-1511 Be sure to mention you are dining for Kuumbwa Jazz

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legendary Willie Nelson stops by the Catalyst this Friday.

FRIDAY, JANUARY 28 • 7:30 PM

OVERTONE PRESENTED BY DINA EASTWOOD

South African A Cappella Sensations featured on the soundtrack Invictus $12/Adv $15/Door

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MONDAY, JANUARY 31 • 7 PM Vocalist celebrates her gospel roots!

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Taking a page from the John Fahey playbook, Sean Smith is a fingerpicking guitarist of immense technical ability who is not content to reside within the easy feeling of a beautiful melody. He lays a foundation of solid folk-blues fundamentals and then starts wandering around the boundaries of his songs, pushing at the edges to see how far he can take them. A master of unearthing shadowy pockets of grace, noise and melancholy, the San Francisco–based Smith crafts an elegant and extraordinary sound. Crepe Place; $8; 9pm. (Cat Johnson)

Neither Texas cops nor the inevitable pot bust can slow down Willie Nelson, who at the age of 77 is still an inveterate road dog. A titan of American music, Nelson bears claim to one of its most distinctive and nuanced voices, a reedlike instrument that owes as much to Tin Pan Alley as it does to Music Row. Nelson has continually refined and transformed his sound, at times going as far afield as reggae and Dixieland jazz, but gets back to his roots on his latest release, Country Music, a restrained collection of ballads and hard-luck laments. The Catalyst; $69 adv/$76 door; 7:30pm. (Paul M. Davis)

Hailing from the Atlas Mountains of Morocco, Fattah Abbou and Mohamed Aoualou are builders of musical and cultural bridges. As founders of the multicultural world-fusion group Aza, they combine traditional North African instruments such as the oud and bendir with guitars, pennywhistles and horns to create a sound that is at once ancient and futuresque. Rooted deeply in Saharan-African blues styles, Aza is contagious and danceable music that defies categorization and inspires global awareness. Don Quixote’s; $12; 8pm. (CJ)

LIZZ WRIGHT

$25/Adv $28/Door No Jazztix or Comps Sponsored by Carolyn Hyatt and Joe Hyatt Co-sponsored by Smoothjazz.com Dinner served Mondays & Thursdays beginning at 6pm, serving premium wines & microbrewed beers. Snacks & desserts available all other nights. All age venue.

Advance tickets at Logos Books & Records and online at kuumbwajazz.org. Tickets subject to service charge and 5% S.C. City Admissions Tax.

Independently Produced Events SATURDAY, JANUARY 15 • 6 PM

YOUTH RESOURCE BANK BENEFIT CABARET FEATURING: EXTRA LARGE, HONEYMOON & HOUSTON JONES Tickets: $20 Tickets at: Gateways Books, Streetlight Records and online at www.brownpapertickets.com Info: 831-689-9609

320-2 Cedar St • Sa nta C r u z 427-2227

kuumbwajazz.org

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1=<13@BA /<2@3E 07@2 Jan. 29 at Rio Theatre ;/@1G >:/G5@=C<2 Feb. 3 at Moe’s Alley 1/:74=@<7/ 5C7B/@ B@7= Feb. 9 at Don Quixote’s

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B63 1/:74=@<7/ 6=<3G2@=>A Buskers often have a hard time transitioning from the subway station to the stage. What works on the street may not translate to a sweaty rock club, no matter how many similarities there may be between the two venues. The California Honeydrops are the exception to the rule. An Oakland-based five-piece specializing in blues, gospel, New Orleans jazz and early R&B, the California Honeydrops lay down slinky grooves as well-suited for the dance floor as they are the street corner. It’s gritty, authentic stuff honed by playing for the toughest, most disinterested crowds imaginable, and the dues paid are apparent in their high-energy performances. With Harry & the Hitmen. Moe’s Alley; $10; 8pm. (PMD)

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6=CA3 =4 4:=G2 Pink Floyd cover bands may be a dime a dozen, but few of them give whole-hearted attention to both the musical and the visual facets of psych rock’s most beloved act. The seven members of San Francisco’s House of Floyd remedy this oversight by pairing their epic and precise performance

with an ambitious stage show that includes deranged videos, laser lights and, most recently, a giant inf latable pig recalling the cover of the album Animals. The septet’s act, through relentless touring, has become something of a legend in Northern California, and while we’re not saying that someone should show up having consumed a mind-altering substance, we’re not saying they shouldn’t, either. Don Quixote’s; $15; 8pm. (Curtis Cartier)

8=6< D/<23@A:713 Feb. 10 at Crepe Place ABA' Feb. 16 and 17 at Catalyst 0=H A1/55A Feb. 27 at Catalyst /CAB7< :=C<53 :7H/@2A March 26 at Kuumbwa /@:= 5CB6@73 April 13 at Rio Theatre

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Brainchild of multi-instrumentalist Jimmy LaValle, the Album Leaf has been crafting dreamy soundscapes that meld elements of rock, pop, electronic, ambient and experimental music for more than 10 years. Coming of age in the mostly-instrumental post-rock scene of the 1990s, LaValle and his Album Leaf project have inspired countless bands, contributed a solid handful of well-received albums to the musical underground and put many a listener into an otherworldly state with their hauntingly beautiful compositions that have more in common with the rolling seas of emotion or a breathtaking view than the latest hit song. Crepe Place; $12 adv/$15 door; 9pm. (CJ)

Poncho Sanchez grew up taking notes from greats like Tito Puente and later became a protÊgÊ of Latin jazz legend Cal Tjader, remaining a fixture in his band until Tjader’s death in 1982, when he signed a solo record deal. He has made a distinctive amalgam of Latin jazz, swing, bebop and salsa all his own, and has risen to prominence with it: he’s regarded today as one of the great living percussionists. His band’s newest album, Psychedelic Blues, was nominated for the 2011 Best Latin Jazz Album Grammy—if it wins, that will be his second Grammy; the first was for 2000’s Latin Soul. Kuumbwa; $25 adv/$28 door; 7 and 9pm. (Tessa Stuart)

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AB@7<5A /BB/1932 The Infamous Stringdusters bust a catgut at Moe’s Alley.

The members of bluegrass band the Infamous Stringdusters started as backing musicians for both jam bands and mainstream country artists like Dolly Parton and LeeAnn Womack before uniting to create their own music. It’s lucky they did, as their banjo, bass, fiddle and lap steel guitar–laden harmonies bring both expert skill and energetic injection of new ideas to the bluegrass scene. Despite their relatively recent appearance, the Stringdusters are quickly making a name for themselves; their new album, Magic #9, just garnered at Grammy nod for Best Country Instrumental Performance. Moe’s Alley; $10 adv/$12 door; 8pm. (TS)

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-YPKH` 1HU\HY` ‹ AGES 21+ 6WLU +HUJL -SVVY :OV^

WILLIE NELSON

(K] +YZ ‹ +YZ ! W T :OV^ ! W T -YPKH` 1HU\HY` ‹ In the Atrium ‹ AGES 21+ FRIDAY NIGHT FUNCTION: DJ Aspect DJ Tone Sol, Nima Fadavi 56 *6=,9 ‹ W T W T

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Dieselboy

Vital SC welcomes plus Bare also Smash Gordon (K] ID Req. ‹ +YZ W T :OV^ W T

:H[\YKH` 1HU\HY` ‹ In the Atrium ‹ AGES 21+

HUMBOLDT SQUID

Doors to Nowhere also Culo A Boca +YZ ‹ +YZ ! W T :OV^ W T plus

;\LZKH` 1HU\HY` ‹ In the Atrium ‹ AGES 21+

RASTA CRUZ REGGAE TUESDAYZ

with DJs Don-ette & Lion-S + weekly guests DJs Models/Dancers 56 *6=,9 ‹ :OV^ W T

1HU Tribal Seeds Atrium (Ages 16+) 1HU Vital SC: Eliot Lipp (Ages 18+) 1HU The Jacka/ Husalah (Ages 16+) 1HU JFK of MSTRKRFT (Ages 18+) 1HU Vital SC: Datsik (Ages 18+) 1HU Boz Scaggs (Ages 21+) 1HU Railroad Earth (Ages 16+) -LI Dead Kennedys (Ages 16+) -LI Rob Zombie (Ages 16+) -LI BadďŹ sh a Tribute to Sublime (Ages 16+) -LI Trombone Shorty & Orleans Ave. Los Amigos Invisibles (Ages 21+) -LI Ky-Mani Marley (Ages 16+) -LI STS9 (Ages 21+ & 16+) -LI Y & T (Ages 21+) -LI Less Than Jake (Ages 16+) -LI B.B. King (Ages 21+) -LI Pepper (Ages 16+) -LI Streetlight Manifesto (Ages 16+) -LI Robin Trower (Ages 21+) <USLZZ V[OLY^PZL UV[LK HSS ZOV^Z HYL KHUJL ZOV^Z ^P[O SPTP[LK ZLH[PUN Tickets subject to city tax & service charge by phone 866-384-3060 & online

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Film Capsules <3E 1/>A 1=C<B@G AB@=<5

(PG-13; 112 min.) Gwyneth Paltrow stars as washed-up country singer Kelly Canter, who joins forced with an up-and-coming songwriter played by Garrett Hedlund. Together the pair are able to revive Canter’s flagging career, but her newfound fame puts a strain on the relationship with her husband/manager (played by Tim McGraw), tempting him to seek solace in the arms of a young beauty queen (Leighton Meester of TV’s Gossip Girl). (Opens Fri at Santa Cruz 9 and Green Valley.) 4=@07223< >:/<3B

(1956) Trouble on Altair4, where a spaceship has gone missing. The planet is landed on by a cast of science fiction stalwarts, led by Leslie Nielsen, back

when he was one of the stalwartest of the stalwart. In interviews, Nielsen used to point out that this movie paved the way for Star Trek; at least, his performance certainly paved the way for William Shatner’s Capt. Kirk. These space jockeys meet the master of Altair-4 (Walter Pidgeon), who is researching an uncanny planetary force; his beautiful daughter (Anne Francis) is troubling the doctor’s subconscious mind. A gorgeous landmark of 1950s futurism. Though the idea of The Tempest in outer space is a novel one, the Shakespeare play could have been sourced for so much more. Robbie the Robot is everything you want in a mechanical pal, but he’s too sweet to be Caliban, and the Reader’s Digest–level Freudianism dates this film somewhat.

The film took home the Oscar for special effects the year of its release. This week’s screenings are timely; star Anne Francis died earlier this week at age 80; Leslie Nielsen passed away in November. (Plays Sat-Sun 11am at Aptos.) (RvB) 6==2 B= 1=/AB (PG; 140 min.) A feature-length documentary follows four teams as they embark on the longest relay running race in the world. Following the documentary there will a simulcast discussion of running including running experts and champions in the same theater. (Plays Tue 8:30pm at Santa Cruz 9.) :/ >67: :7D3( 2C2/;3: 1=<2C1BA 033B6=D3<

(Unrated; 150 min.) Venezuelan conductor Gustavo Dudamel commands the Los Angeles Philharmonic simulcast from L.A.’s Walt Disney

SHOWTIMES

Concert Hall: John Adams’ Slonimsky’s earbox; Leonard Bernstein’s Symphony no. 1, “Jeremiah,� and Beethoven’s Symphony no. 7. (plays sun 2pm at santa cruz 9.) ;/23 7< 2/53<6/;

(R; 113 min.) Based on the true story of female workers who manned the sewing machines at the Ford assembly plant in Dagenham, England, who walked out in protest of pay discrimination in 1968. Sally Hawkins makes a star turn as the leader of the picket that resulted in the creation of the Equal Pay law that passed in England in 1970. From director Nigel Cole, who previously gave audiences the film Calendar Girls. (Opens Fri at the Nick.) B63 ;3B :7D3 7< 62( ¡:/ 4/<17C::/ 23: E3AB¸ (Unrated; 230 min.)

The Puccini opera, directly translated as “Girl of the

Movie reviews by Traci Hukill, Kate Jacobson, Tessa Stuart and Richard von Busack

West,� is adapted from a play of that name by David Belasco. Set in a California Gold Rush town, the opera tells the story of the virtuous Minnie, beloved by the miners to whom she gives Bible lessons and by the upstanding Sheriff Rance, who falls in love with a dangerous bandit the men have sworn they will bring to justice. (Plays Sat 10am at Santa Cruz 9.) A3/A=< =4 B63 E7B16

(PG-13; 113 min.) A pair of 14th-century knights (Nicolas Cage and Ron Perlman) return from the Crusades only to find their homeland besieged by the Black Plague. Local clergy accuse a young local girl of being the witch responsible for the devastation and charge the knights with transporting her to a monastery where the monks can remove the

Showtimes are for Wednesday, Jan. 5, through Wednesday, Jan. 12, unless otherwise indicated. Programs and showtimes are subject to change without notice.

/>B=A 17<3;/A

122 Rancho Del Mar Center, Aptos 831.688.6541 www.thenick.com 6]e 2] G]c 9\]e — Wed-Thu 2; 4:30; 7; 9:30; Fri-Wed 1:10; 6. :WbbZS 4]QYS`a — Daily 2:50; 5; 7:10; 9:20 plus Sat-Sun 12:40pm. BVS A]QWOZ <Sbe]`Y — Fri-Wed 3:30; 8:30. 4]`PWRRS\ >ZO\Sb — Sat-Sun 11am.

5cZZWdS`¸a B`OdSZa — Wed-Thu 1:10; 3:25; 5:40; 8; 10:15; Fri-Wed 2:20; 4:30; 6:50;

9:05 plus Sat-Sun 11:45am. 6O``g >]bbS` O\R bVS 2SObVZg 6OZZ]ea >O`b — Wed-Thu 3:15; 6:30; 9:35; Fri-

0ZOQY AeO\ — Daily 11:45; 2:10; 4:40; 7:15; 9:45. BO\UZSR — Wed-Thu 11:30; 2; Fri-Wed 11:55; 2:30. BVS B]c`Wab — Fri-Wed 4:55; 7:30; 10. B`]\ :SUOQg — Wed-Thu 4:30; 7:30; 10:15. B`cS 5`Wb — Wed-Thu 11:10; 1:40; 4:15; 7; 9:40; Fri-Wed 11:30; 2; 4:30; 7; 9:40.

Wed 3:15; 6:30; 9:35 plus Fri and Sun 12:05pm. 6]e 2] G]c 9\]e — Wed-Thu 1:15; 4:10; 7:10; 10; Fri-Sat noon; Mon-Wed 2:30. BVS B]c`Wab — Wed-Thu 2:05; 4:45; 7:20; 9:50; Fri-Wed 2:40; 5:10; 7:40; 10:15. (No Sun 2:40; no Tue 2:40; 7:40 or 10:15.) B`]\ :SUOQg !2 — Wed-Thu 1:35; 4:30; 7:30; 10:25; Fri-Wed 1:15; 4:10; 7:10; 9:55. B`cS 5`Wb — Wed-Thu 2:20; 5; 7:40; 10:20; Fri-Wed 2:10; 4:50; 7:30; 10:05 plus FriSun 11:35am. G]UW 0SO` !2 — Wed-Thu 2:10; 4:40; 6:50; 9; Fri-Wed 1:50; 4; 6:45; 9 plus Fri-Sun 11:50am. BVS ;Sb :WdS W\ 62( :O 4O\QWcZZO 2SZ ESab — Sat 10am. : / >VWZVO`[]\WQ :WdS( 2cRO[SZ 1]\RcQba 0SSbV]dS\ — Sun 2pm. 6]]R b] 1]Oab — Tue 8:30pm.

23: ;/@

A1=BBA D/::3G 17<3;/

1124 Pacific Ave., Santa Cruz 831.426.7500 www.thenick.com

226 Mt. Hermon Rd., Scotts Valley 831.438.3260 www.cineluxtheatres.com

BVS 9W\U¸a A^SSQV — Daily 1:40; 3:20; 4:20; 6; 7; 8:30; 9:30; Fri-Wed 1:40; 4:20; 7; 9:30 plus Sat-Sun 11am and 12:40pm. BO\UZSR — Daily 1:20; 4; 6:30; 8:45 plus Sat-Sun 11:10am.

ASOa]\ ]T bVS EWbQV — (Opens Fri) 2:30; 4:55; 7:20; 9:40 plus Fri-Sun 11:55. 0ZOQY AeO\ — Fri-Wed 2:10; 4:30; 7; 9:30 plus Fri-Sun 11:45am. BVS 1V`]\WQZSa ]T <O`\WO( D]gOUS ]T bVS 2Oe\ B`SORS` — Wed-Thu 1:30;

" AB /D3<C3 17<3;/

1475 41st Ave., Capitola 831.479.3504 www.cineluxtheatres.com

<7193:=23=<

Lincoln and Cedar streets, Santa Cruz 831.426.7500 www.thenick.com ;ORS W\ 2OUS\VO[ — (Opens Fri) 1:50; 4:20; 6:50; 9:10 plus Sat-Sun 11:20am. 7 :]dS G]c >VWZZW^ ;]``Wa — Wed-Thu 2:30; 4:50; 6:50; 9:10; Fri-Wed 2:50; 7:10

plus Sat-Sun 12:40pm. % 6]c`a — Wed-Thu 2:40; 4:50; 7:10; 9:20; Fri-Wed 5; 9:20. 0ZOQY AeO\ — Wed-Thu 2; 3; 4:30; 5:30; 7; 7:45; 9:30; 10; Fri-Wed 3; 5:30; 7:45; plus Fri-Sat 10pm and Sat-Sun 11:30am and 12:40pm.

@7D3@4@=<B AB/27C; BE7<

155 S. River St, Santa Cruz 800.326.3264 x1701 www.regmovies.com BVS 4WUVbS` — Daily 4; 6:45; 9:20 plus Fri-Sun 1:15pm. :WbbZS 4]QYS`a — Daily 4:15; 7; 9:30 plus Fri-Sun 1pm.

A/<B/ 1@CH 17<3;/ '

1405 Pacific Ave., Santa Cruz 800.326.3264 x1700 www.regmovies.com 1]c\b`g Ab`]\U — (Opens Fri) 2; 4:35; 7:15; 9:50 plus Fri-Sun 11:30am. ASOa]\ ]T bVS EWbQV — (Opens Fri) 2:50; 5:15; 7:50; 10:10 plus Fri-Sun 12:20pm. 1V`]\WQZSa ]T <O`\WO( D]gOUS ]T bVS 2Oe\ B`SORS` — Wed-Thu 1:45; 4:20; 7;

9:45; Fri-Wed 1:35; 4:20; 7; 9:40.

4:10; 7; 9:40; Fri-Wed 1:30; 4; 6:30; 9 plus Fri-Sun 11am. :WbbZS 4]QYS`a — Daily 1:55; 4:20; 6:45; 9:10 plus Fri-Sun 11:30am. BO\UZSR — Wed-Thu 2:10. BVS B]c`Wab — Wed-Thu 4:45; 7:30; 10. B`]\ :SUOQg — Wed-Thu 1:45; 4:30; 7:20; 10:10. B`cS 5`Wb — Daily 2; 4:40; 7:10; 9:45 plus Fri-Sun 11:20am. G]UW 0SO` !2 — Wed-Thu 1:40; 4; 6:30; 8:45; Fri-Wed 1:55; 4:20; 6:45; 9:10 plus Fri-Sun 11:30 am.

5@33< D/::3G 17<3;/ &

1125 S. Green Valley Rd, Watsonville 831.761.8200 www.greenvalleycinema.com 1]c\b`g Ab`]\U — (Opens Fri) 1:30; 4:15; 7:05; 9:30 plus Sat-Sun 11:05am. ASOa]\ ]T bVS EWbQV — (Opens Fri) 1:05; 3:15; 5:20; 7:20; 9:30 plus Sat-Sun 11am. BVS 1V`]\WQZSa ]T <O`\WO( D]gOUS ]T bVS 2Oe\ B`SORS` — Wed-Thu 1:30; 4:20; 7. BVS 4WUVbS` — Daily 1:30; 4:15; 7:05; 9:30 plus Sat-Sun 11:05. 5cZZWdS`¸a B`OdSZa — Daily 1:15; 3:25; 5:20; 7:15; 9:15 plus Sat-Sun 11am. 6]e 2] G]c 9\]e — Wed-Thu 9:25. :WbbZS 4]QYS`a — Daily 1:05; 3:10; 5:15; 7:25; 9:30 plus Sat-Sun 11am. BVS B]c`Wab — Wed-Thu 1:30; 4:25; 7:10; 9:30. B`]\ :SUOQg !2 — Daily 1:30; 4:20; 7; 9:30 plus Sat-Sun 11am. B`cS 5`Wb — Daily 1:25; 4:30; 7; 9:25 plus Sat-Sun 11:05am. G]UW 0SO` — Daily 1:15; 3:15; 5:15; 7:15; 9:15 plus Sat-Sun 11:15am.

source of her dark powers and end the suffering. Filmed in Austria, Hungary and Croatia. (Opens Fri at Santa Cruz 9, Scotts Valley and Green Valley.)

@3D73EA 0:/19 AE/< (R; 103

min.) Apparently from the annals of the Gotham City Ballet: facing the dual role in a production of Swan Lake, a virginal ballerina (Natalie Portman) cracks. On one side she’s muscled by her heartless, sexually harassing director (a convincing Vincent Cassel); on the other, she’s smothered by her mother (Barbara Hershey). And then a new dancer (Mila Kunis) arrives from San Francisco to inspire sexual panic and precipitate disaster. In the rehearsal scenes, the camera spins around with the dancers, and we hear the scuffing of their feet and their harsh panting, or we watch in close-up as a slipper is stabbed, sliced and stitched into shape. It’s ballet as murderous ordeal. It’s only when the music starts up that Black Swan starts to feel like a great movie, simply because the Tchaikovsky would make us believe anything. Director Darren Aronofsky (The Wrestler) takes this 1940ish plot about a frigid woman going nuts so very seriously that he probably should have done without the borrowings from Cronenberg and De Palma. Terrific color, anyway. (RvB) B63 16@=<71:3A =4 </@<7/( D=G/53 =4 B63 2/E< B@3/23@

(PG; 115 min.) The elder Pevensies, Peter and Susan, are in America. Left behind are two younger children, Lucy (Georgie Henley) and Edmund (Skandar Keynes), who are billeted with their hateful cousin Eustace (Will Poulter). Inundated by an enchanted painting, Lucy, Edmund and Eustace end up bobbing in the sea right next to the Narnian navy vessel containing Prince

Caspian (Ben Barnes). Eventually, seven golden swords have to be rescued and placed on the altar of Aslan. There are times when the Narnia movies are as good as CGI gets. The animators challenge themselves to pose their legions of creatures under high-noon lighting, instead of disguising the flaws with half-shadows or twilight. (Read a full-length review at www.metroactive .com.) (RvB) B63 4756B3@ (R; 114 min.)

David O. Russell’s account of pugilists Micky Ward (Mark Wahlberg) and Dicky Eklund (Christian Bale) is juicy, touchingly acted and rich with atmosphere. Ward, who’s been training all his life with his halfbrother Dicky, is in a career lull as a “stepping-stoneâ€? fighter, used as a boxer for other boxers to leapfrog over. He’s divorced, with a kid; one night he meets a weary bartender, Charlene (Amy Adams), who’s tough enough to fight off Ward’s overprotective family, a gaggle of seven high-haired, sharp-nailed sisters and scary chainsmoking mom Alice (Melissa Leo). All put pressure on Micky to keep Dicky as his trainer. One little problem with the elder half-sibling’s work: he’s a hopeless crack addict. (RvB) 5C::7D3@¸A B@/D3:A

(PG; 85 min.) Whether one is a fan of his or not, most would agree that Jack Black is about as big as he ought to get. The computer effects to make Black vast in the desperately edited Gulliver’s Travels seem like wretched excess. Shipwrecked on the island of Lilliput, Black’s Gulliver meets a race of bite-sized foreigners who imprison him. Subplots include a bromance between Black and a Lilliputian (Jason Segel) with a crush of his own on the kingdom’s princess (Emily Blunt), as well as conflict with a jealous (and unfunny) general, played by Chris O’Dowd). Parts of the script are reasonably faithful to the book; nearly straight from Swift is a passage on the here-unnamed island of Brobdingnag. It’s the film’s comedic highlight maybe because Black is temporarily cut down to size. By the time the directors haul out a giant robot, it’s clear that the most interesting part of this tale went missing. Swift’s satire on the stupidity of wars of religion

j #

A/<B/1@CH 1=; january 5-12, 2011 47:;

is here just a vague antiwar message. The heavy product placement is shoved in by people blind to the implications of what happens when a cargo-bearing colossus arrives on a small island. (RvB) 6=E 2= G=C 9<=E (PG-13; 114

min.) The son of an embattled corporate giant (Paul Rudd) and a professional baseball player (Owen Wilson) both vie for the affection of a professional softball player (Reese Witherspoon) recently cut from the national team and struggling to find new purpose for her life in this fluffy romcom. 7 :=D3 G=C >67::7> ;=@@7A (R; 102 min.)

Jim Carey and Ewan MacGregor are starcrossed lovers in this romantic comedy based on the life of Steven Jay Russell, a convicted con artist who fell in love with fellow inmate Phillip Morris. After Morris was released, Russell escaped from incarceration four times to be reunited with his soul mate. B63 97<5¸A A>3316

(R; 118 min.) Colin Firth gives a deeply affecting portrayal of a shamewracked man born and bred to be a spokesman, yet who is handicapped with a crippling stammer. In the 1930s, Firth is the Duke of York, a family man with two daughters and a wife named Elizabeth (Helena Bonham Carter). The stammering Duke, known to his family as “Bertie,� is the official spare to the heir, next in line to the Prince of Wales. A superlatively cast Guy Pearce embodies this Edward’s upper-class shadiness and monstrous entitlement. The Prince is the love slave of a twice-married American named Simpson; his affair and his indifference to world troubles (“Hitler will sort them out�) are pushing events to a constitutional crisis. The man tapped to solve it is Lionel Logue (Geoffrey Rush), an Australian speech therapist tasked with helping the Duke find his voice on the eve of England’s entry

into World War II. Most of The King’s Speech is an inspired actor’s duel about the conflict between pride and need. Rush’s wit and nimbleness counterpoints this story of majesty, which is almost exactly as tragic as it is comic. (RvB) % 6=C@A (R; 94 min.) 127 Hours is director Danny Boyle’s version of the truelife story of climber Aron Ralston. In spring 2003, Ralston was pinned under a half-ton boulder in a remote Utah canyon; what he did to survive became worldwide news. 127 Hours records an ordeal so singular, Poe couldn’t improve on it. Unfortunately, Boyle (Slumdog Millionaire) tries to blow up the story’s elemental horror through pyrotechnics. He starts with a burst of relentless motion, as in his Trainspotting. Unfortunately, this ADD style has been thoroughly appropriated for sports-drink commercials. James Franco’s visceral acting in the service of this horror story probably should be praised, even if it’s not a pleasure to watch. One would have to be fairly simple-minded to think of this ghastly story as some kind of triumph of the human spirit. (RvB) B63 A=17/: <3BE=@9 (PG-13; 2

hrs.) Fiendishly clever and funny movie about the creation of an Internet monster. As Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg, Jesse Eisenberg gives a master class on recessive acting: he’s beady eyed and covert, with the occasional pit-viper-like sway of a truculent, lowered forehead. It’s the kind of remorseless superiority that can only look comically childish and wounded onscreen. The film shuttles between the present-day deposition of the now arrogantly rich Zuckerberg, as he’s sued by a quartet of burned partners (among them his former best friend Eduardo, played by Andrew Garfield). In flashback, we see his own history—a Jewish student at WASP-ridden

Harvard, a social reject whose grudge-hacking was his entry into fame. Later, Zuckerberg meets the founder of Napster, Sean Parker—played by Justin Timberlake, excellent as a happy wastrel. The Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross score is closer to the sinister Byrne and Eno we loved once than the flowery, love-struck Byrne and Eno in Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps. Fincher regular cinematographer Jeff Cronenweth keeps us oriented by making the walnut-lined tombs of Harvard so different from the lambency of the sun in Palo Alto. Aaron Sorkin’s wild, witty script hands out punishment that goes beyond the financial penalties: this is a comedy in the Balzac sense, a balancing act; the mockery and the disgust for greed matches the essential lightness of the situation. It’s only Facebook, after all. (RvB) B/<5:32 (PG; 153 min.) Directors Nathan Greno and Byron Howard stress the most resonant interpretation of the tale: Rapunzel as a myth for all parts of the world where girls aren’t allowed to run free. The imprisoning witch Gothel is a curvy villainess feeding on the youth and hopes of the girl whom she imprisons. Remodeled as a Disney princess (voiced by Mandy Moore), this Rapunzel is freed by a rakish young thief. Third-act developments take the plot into a different resolution than the Brothers Grimm charted, adding to the surprise of the cartoon. You can see the influences and salute them as they pass: the antique charm of 3D Viewmaster fairy-tale slides, Romanian villages, Utah’s Canyonlands, the floating lanterns of the Japanese Obon festival; the block-headed yobs at the Snuggly Ducky tavern look as if they modeled for Britain’s Spitting Image. As for actual hero Maximus the horse, there hasn’t been such a hilarious steed since Chuck Jones died. (RvB)

B63 B=C@7AB (PG13; 114 min.) Johnny Depp stars as Frank, a hapless American tourist unlucky enough to have been targeted by Elise, a woman with a dangerous past, played by Angelina Jolie. Frank attempts to kindle a romance while Elise attempts to evade her pursuers—a criminal exboyfriend, the gangster he stole from and the agent (Paul Bettany) hot on their trail. B@=< :35/1G (PG; 127 min.) In this highly anticipated remake of the 1982 cult sci-fi flick, wonder programmerturned-hacker Kevin Flynn (Jeff Bridges) must beat a series of computer games from the inside. Featuring a soundtrack composed by legendary electronic duo Daft Punk. B@C3 5@7B (PG-13; 128 min.) Mattie Ross (Hailee Steinfeld), a self-assured 14-yearold, arrives in Fort Smith, Ark., in the early 1880s to track down Tom Cheney (Josh Brolin), the hired hand who murdered her father. The sheriff lists some U.S. marshals who could track him. Mattie chooses Reuben “Rooster� Cogburn (Jeff Bridges): ruthless and dead to fear, if often dead to the world. Mattie offers the marshal a $50 reward to cross into the Choctaw lands to retrieve Cheney. While waiting for his decision, Mattie encounters LaBoeuf (Matt Damon), a fancy, buckskin-covered ranger who is seeking Cheney for a previous murder down in Texas. The three, reluctantly matched, draw closer to the killer but feud along the way. Bridges lulls us with his take on the part, doing things that John Wayne wasn’t capable of as an actor, expressing the desperate underside of a bluff, a rowdier level of buffoonery and a quitter’s despair. The Coens have the bravery to deliver the downbeat coda to this story left out in 1969. It increases the stature of this film, its depth, beauty and sadness. (RvB)

26 |

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& j /AB@=:=5G january 5-12, 2011 A/<B/1@CH 1=;

Astrology Free Will

By Rob Brezsny

For the week of January 5 /@73A (March 21–April 19): “A man may fulfill the object of his existence by asking a question he cannot answer, and attempting a task he cannot achieve,� mused 19th-century author Oliver Wendell Holmes Sr. Advice that wild could just as well have been dispensed by a feral saint living in a cave in the woods. And now I’m passing it on to you, Aries, just in time for the beginning of what may be your wildest year in a decade. In my astrological opinion, you are ready to be a connoisseur of mysteries that purify the mind and nurture the soul . . . a daredevil of the spirit in quest of seemingly impossible dreams . . . a fierce adept of the wisdom of uncertainty who’s in love with unpredictable teachings. B/C@CA (April 20–May 20): What confusing commotion would you like to walk away from and never come back to? What lessons have you learned so well that you’re overdue to graduate from them? What long-term healing process would you like to finish up so you can finally get started on the building phase that your healing will give you the power to carry out? These are excellent questions to ask yourself as you plan your life in the next six months.

53;7<7 (May 21–June 20): The Strait of Gibraltar is the narrow passage between Europe and Africa where the Mediterranean Sea joins the Atlantic Ocean. According to legend, in ancient times the Latin phrase “ne plus ultra� was inscribed in the rock overlooking this gateway. It meant “not further beyond,� and served as a warning to sailors not to venture out to the wild waters past the strait. Eventually, that cautionary advice became irrelevant, of course. With a sturdy vessel, skilled crew, good preparation, and expert knowledge based on the experience of others, venturing out past the “ne plus ultra� point wasn’t dangerous. I hope you’ll take that as your cue in 2011, Gemini.

1/<13@ (June 21–July 22): There were problems with the soccer balls used in the World Cup last year. Many players felt they were difficult to control. Their trajectory was unpredictable. Brazilian forward Luis Fabiano went so far as to say that the ball “doesn’t want to be kicked.� Other players said the balls were poorly made, like those “you buy in a supermarket.� I bring this to your attention as a cautionary metaphor, Cancerian. In 2011 you will be taking part in your equivalent of the World Cup. It will be crucial to have the very best tools and accessories. You can’t afford to play with balls that don’t respond accurately to your skillful means. :3= (July 23–Aug. 22): Biological diversity refers to the variety of life forms in any particular area, while cultural diversity measures the richness of social forms of expression. Then there’s biocultural diversity, which measures both together. Can you guess the places on the planet where biocultural diversity is highest? They’re Indonesia, Malaysia, Melanesia, the Amazon Basin and Central Africa. I would love it if you had a chance to immerse yourself in environments like those in 2011, Leo. If you can’t manage that, find the next best thing. You will thrive by exposing yourself to a kaleidoscopic mix of human types and natural inf luences. D7@5= (Aug. 23–Sept. 22): When I started my rock band World Entertainment War, I was guided by a vision of us having two lead singers, me and another person. Ultimately I chose a woman named Darby Gould as my collaborator. While I have decent skills as a vocalist, her talent is genius-level. I knew that our work together would push me to be at the top of my game and allow me to write ambitious songs that I didn’t have the chops to sing by myself. I’ve always been pleased with how that strategy worked. Would you consider giving yourself a similar challenge in 2011, Virgo? It’ll be the Year of Collaboration for you. Why not put yourself in a position to transcend the limitations you have when operating solely under your own power? :70@/ (Sept. 23–Oct. 22): Africa is cracking open in preparation for the birth of a new ocean. The whole process will take 10 million years, but the first sign occurred in 2005, when a 37-milelong fissure appeared in Ethiopia. Eventually, say geologists, the rift will grow enormous and fill up with seawater. I expect a metaphorically comparable development for you in 2011, Libra: the subtle yet monumental beginning of a new “ocean�

you’ll be enjoying and learning from and dealing with for many years to come.

A1=@>7= (Oct. 23–Nov. 21): In 1967, the U.S. had 31,225 nuclear warheads. But by 2010 it had a mere 5,113. The world’s most militarized nation hopes to scale down to an even more modest 3,000 or so by 2021. In the coming year, Scorpio, I’d love to see you be inspired by that example to begin reducing your own levels of anger and combativeness. You don’t have to do away entirely with your ability to fight everyone who doesn’t agree with you and everything you don’t like; just cut back some. I’m sure that’ll still leave you with plenty of firepower.

A/57BB/@7CA (Nov. 22–Dec. 21): “The heart is forever inexperienced,� said Thoreau. He believed our feeling nature is eternally innocent; that no matter how much we learn about the game of life, sadness or lust or rage or joy hits us as hard the thousandth time as it did in the beginning. But is that really true? Are you as likely to plunge into mind-exploding infatuation with your fourth lover as you were with your first? Are you as susceptible now to having your world turned upside-down by f lash f loods of emotion as you were at age 15? Over the years, haven’t you acquired wisdom about your reactive tendencies, and hasn’t that transformed them? I disagree with Thoreau. I say that for the person who wants to cultivate emotional intelligence, the heart sure as hell better be capable of gaining experience. What do you think, Sagittarius? If you’re aligned with my view, 2011 will educate and ripen your heart as never before. 1/>@71=@< (Dec. 22–Jan. 19): “We have to stumble though so much dirt and humbug before we reach home,� wrote novelist Herman Hesse. “And we have no one to guide us. Our only guide is homesickness.� That’s the bad news, Capricorn. The good news, according to my analysis, is that 2011 could very well be the year that your homesickness drives you all the way home. For best results, keep this tip in mind: To get the full benefit of the homesickness, you shouldn’t suppress it. Only by feeling it deeply, as a burning, grinding ache, will you be able to ride it all the way home.

/?C/@7CA (Jan. 20–Feb. 18): In the past, few dog shows allowed mutts to compete. Pure breeds were prized above all others. That’s changing, though, now that the American Kennel Club has opened up a new category just for mongrels. They won’t be judged by guidelines specific to a particular breed, but rather according to their natural talents. This shift in standards mirrors a comparable development in your world, Aquarius. In 2011, it’ll be easier to find success simply by being your mottled, speckled, variegated self. There’ll be less pressure for you to live up to standards of perfection meant for the pure breeds. >7A13A (Feb. 19–March 20): “All your longings know where to go,� writes poet Nick Piombino, “but you have to tell them to open their eyes.� That’s one of your big assignments in 2010, Pisces: to make sure your longings keep their eyes open. It’s not as easy as it might sound. Sometimes your longings get so entranced by obsessive fantasies—so distracted by the stories that are swirling around in your imagination—that they’re blind to what’s right in front of them. You must speak to your longings tenderly and patiently, as you would a beloved animal, coaxing them to trust that life will bring more interesting and useful blessings than anything fantasy could provide.

6][Se]`Y( AS\R [S O ZWab ]T g]c` b]^ TWdS <Se GSO`¸a `Sa]ZcbW]\a 5] b] @SOZ/ab`]Z]Ug Q][ O\R QZWQY ]\ Âľ3[OWZ @]P Âś Go to @3/:/AB@=:=5G 1=; to check out Rob Brezsny’s Expanded Weekly Audio Horoscopes and Daily Text Message Horoscopes. The audio horoscopes are also available by phone &%% &%! "&&& or 1.900.950.7700

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