September 2012 Metro Christian Living

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SEPTEMBER 2012

Trusting a Gracious God in a Time of Trauma Six Back-to-School Pointers for Back-to-School Parents

Chick-Fil-A Dilemma for Engaging the Culture

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2 SEPTEMBER 2012 â?˜ Metro Christian Living

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contents SEPTEMBER 2012 columns 12 The Way I See It Chick-Fil-A… Dilemma for Engaging the Culture

16 Modern Motherhood The Tale of an Anti-Soccer Mom

20 Education Connection Interview with Todd Mitchell, Headmaster of the Veritas School

22 Outside In The Smell of Football

24 Salt & Light Wellsfest 2012

26 Think Tank Then What?

36 Let’s Get Real Are You Being Fired?

37 Let’s Talk it Over Mirror, Mirror Your Kids

features

28

38 Pastor’s Perspective Trusting a Gracious God in a Time of Trauma

Tyrone Keys

40 Living My Call

A Legacy of Faith, Hope, and Love

Preparing To Be A Mom

46 HomeWorks Help for the Overloaded Life

47 Legal Advice

48

metro ®

Volume 7, Number 3 Publisher: MHS Publications, Inc., Member, M.I.P.A. Editor: Marilyn Tinnin marilyn@metrochristianliving.com Administrative Assistant: Carol Rodgers carol@metrochristianliving.com Art Direction/Graphic Design Sandra K. Goff Graphic Production Assistant Kate Thomas Sales Marilyn Tinnin, Kimberly Stephens, Suzanne Tanner Contributing Writers Ariel Anderton, Kimberly Grace Bowman, Lydia Bolen, Anne Buck, Dr. John Cox, Shawn Dean, Dr. Ligon Duncan, Cathy Haynie, William Howell, Jackson Heart Clinic, Robin O’Bryant, Tammy Thomas, Danny Williams, Martin Willoughby, Andy Wimberly Distribution Assistants Laura Kidder, Randy Fortenberry, Carol Rodgers, Andrea Sabillion, Rachel Schulte, Jerri Strickland, Priscilla Sullivan, Tim Waldon, Bob Whatley

Metro Christian Living 573 Highway 51 North, Suite C Ridgeland, MS 39157 Phone 601-790-9076 • Fax 601-790-9078 www.metrochristianliving.com

Very Important: Care of the Caregiver

48 All in the Family Six Back-to-School Pointers for Back-to-School Parents

departments 11 Healthy Living

37 34

Five Myths of Strength Training

18 The Doctor Is In Young at Heart Gala

34 Food For Thought

43

Back to Busy

42 Christian Commerce Circle 7 with Will Pace

43 Money Matters Measuring SUCCESS

44 Fresh Finds Back-to--School Finds

51 A View From You Comments from our Website

52 Rave Reviews Books, Movies, and Music

What’s Coming Next Month?

Deborah Bryant

➺

6 SEPTEMBER 2012 ❘ Metro Christian Living

in every issue 8 53 54 54

Editor’s Letter Event Calendar Quips & Quotes Ad Directory

Metro Christian Living is committed to encouraging individuals in their daily lives by presenting the faith stories of others and by providing information that will point every person, at every stage of life, to a deeper, authentic, personal, and life-changing encounter with Jesus Christ. Views expressed in Metro Christian Living do not necessarily represent those of the publisher. Every effort has been made by the Metro Christian Living staff to insure accuracy of the publication contents. However, we do not guarantee the accuracy of all information nor the absence of errors and omissions; hence, no responsibility can be or is assumed. All Rights Reserved.

Copyright 2012 by Metro Christian Living, Inc. Scripture taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version, copyright 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of International Bible Society.

Metro Christian Living is published monthly and is available at high traffic locations throughout the metropolitan area. Copies are also available by subscription, $29 for one year. Single issues available for $3 an issue.

POSTMASTER: Send change of address to Metro Christian Living, 573 Highway 51 North, Suite C, Ridgeland, MS 39157.

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CHRISTIAN L E A D E R O F T H E F U T U R E?

WE NEED YOUR HELP TO RECOGNIZE CHRISTIAN STUDENTS who walk in faith, honor the Lord, and lead with their heart.

CHRISTIAN LEADERS OF THE FUTURE is an opportunity for high-school seniors to share their story of faith and leadership. The top finalists are selected by a panel of judges from around the metro area. They will receive a recognition plaque, gifts, and will be featured on the cover of the March 2013 edition of Metro Christian Living. The most outstanding student will receive a scholarship for the college of their choice.

Applications are available at: www. metrochristianliving.com or through your school counselor or youth pastor.

APPLICATIONS MUST BE RECEIVED

BY DECEMBER 7, 2012 For More Information contact Metro Christian Living 601-790-9076 or Carol@metrochristianliving.com

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➺editor’s letter Living It Out…Practically…Every Single Day Suppose a brother or sister is without clothes and daily food. If one of you says to him, “Go, I wish you well; keep warm and well fed,” but does nothing about his physical needs, what good is it? In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead. – James 2:15-16.

I

It was in early December of last year that an email appeared in my inbox one morning from Tyrone Keys. My football IQ is right up there with my Math IQ…which is, to say the least, less than impressive. I do, however, know

Joy can be real only if ❝ people look on their life as a service, and have a definite object in life outside themselves and their personal happiness.

❞

– Leo Tolstoy

what the Super Bowl is. I do know who the Chicago Bears are, and believe it or not, I do recall the 1980 MSU and Alabama football game at Memorial Stadium when the underdog Bulldogs upset the #1 Crimson Tide in a real cliffhanger. Bulldog Tyrone Keys was largely responsible for causing Alabama’s fumble on the goal line in the final seconds of the game. I knew right away that Tyrone was someone I would enjoy talking to.

He was back in Jackson a few weeks later, and when we met for coffee, he shared his story with me. Today as head of All Sports Community Service, an organization he started in Tampa to provide education, nurture, and mentorship to challenged youth, Tyrone has impacted the lives of literally thousands of youth who have defied the odds and the stereotypes that characterize so many at-risk kids of our day. Tyrone articulates his own defining moments and has gone to great lengths to seek out and express his appreciation to adults who invested love, hope, and time in him. With that in mind, the alumni of the All Sports Community Foundation return as professionals in successful careers to serve as mentors to the kids who come after them. You are in for a treat as you get to know Tyrone and sense his great heart for others. His story is a lesson on so many levels—discipleship, stewardship, purpose, generosity, and most of all—what the love of Christ looks like in ordinary everyday living.

Two remarkable Jackson ladies, Peggy Wall and Barbara Hamilton, are writing a book about Tyrone. It would be like leaving out the juiciest part of the Tyrone story if I did not let you in on their story, which we are including as “The Story Behind the Story.”

I don’t know about you, but the daily headlines have stirred deep emotions in my heart and soul this summer. I have felt a grief over the “lostness” of our culture in a way I never have before. On the week of the shootings at the theatre in Denver, I commented to Charles on the way to church that I hoped our minister would say something that morning that would in some way address the sick feeling inside of me, and something that would give real substance to the question I knew I would get from some of my friends who think I am quite strange. “How did God let this happen?” I was not disappointed.

Dr. Ligon Duncan hit the topic head on, and so I asked him to write a piece for us on how we, as Christians, interpret life in light of God’s Word. God is never surprised, and if we knew His word better, I suppose we would be less surprised as well when those calamitous events come out of nowhere and we wonder, “Lord, were you sitting on your hands?” Do not miss “A Pastor’s Perspective,” a new section we plan to bring you regularly.

We live in a shallow culture that tries to reduce every significant aspect of life to either a bumper sticker or a platitude. I want more. I hope our “Pastor’s Perspective” is going to give our readers real meat to consider as we attempt to live “in the world” without being jaded by it.

The school bell has heralded a new year, new beginnings, and for some, fresh anxieties with so much “new.” I do not miss that aspect of parenting, although Charles and I are starting to experience a little of that through the grandchildren. At this stage of life, we are glad we have dogs instead of children! Seriously, however, I wish I could have had Dr. John Cox to help me out a hundred years ago. Do not miss his advice especially for “Back-to-School Parents!”

I love, love, love this issue. I feel pretty certain you are going to love it, too. Let us know what you think! Y

8 SEPTEMBER 2012 ❘ Metro Christian Living

Marilyn H. Tinnin, Publisher and Editor marilyn@metrochristianliving.com

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by TAMMY THOMAS

➺

healthy living

5 Strength Training MYTHS OF

I’ve got to warn you.There are bogus rumors going around about strength training.

The truth is that strength training is one of the absolute best things you can do for your health and appearance.

If you’ve fallen for these five myths, then you’re missing out on tremendous potential results.

Myth 1: Muscle Turns Into Fat Why would anyone want to build muscle if it could morph into fat after a span of disuse? Rest assured that this is a myth of the highest order.

Muscle tissue is muscle tissue. Fat tissue is fat tissue. One will never become the other.

Myth 2: Strength Training Doesn’t Burn Fat On the contrary, muscle mass is your number one ally against fat gains.

A pound of muscle burns 10-20 calories each day, while you’re just living and breathing.

Regular strength training helps you increase your muscle mass, as well as preserve existing muscle mass, turning you into a fat-burning machine.

Myth 3: Lifting Weights Makes Women Bulk Up Yes, strength training increases the amount of muscle on your body; so many women take this to mean that their body will become bodybuilder-esque, which is not quite the look you’re going for.

The truth is that the female body simply doesn’t contain high enough levels of testosterone to produce that level of results without a very focused and dedicated effort.

The tighter, toned figure of a recreational female weight lifter is every bit feminine.

Myth 4: Strength Training Is For Young People Only Ha! That’s a used-up excuse that senior citizens across the globe have shattered.

Assuming that your doctor has given you the okay, you have much to gain from a regular weight lifting routine.

Improved balance and coordination, better strength and flexibility, and a decreased risk of osteoporosis are just the beginning.

Myth 5: Use Light Weight and High Reps to Tone This myth, popularized in the 90’s, that very high repetitions of very light weights would result in a toned physique, has become outdated. These high repetitions will increase your muscular endurance but will not add strength or tone.

We now know that in order to truly challenge your muscles, heavier weights with lower repetitions are a must. Start with an 8-10 repetition range and push your muscles with each set.

Including strength training as a part of your fitness routine is essential for achieving a fit and toned body.

My custom-made fitness programs remove all of the guesswork for you. I know what works, and I make it my mission to see you reach your goals. Y Tammy Thomas is a personal trainer and the owner of MS Fitness Pro, LLC. Contact Tammy at tammy@msfitnesspro.com or call 601-559-5577 to inquire about her boot camps, group training, or personal training. All levels of training available. metrochristianliving.com ❘ SEPTEMBER 2012 11

➺the way i see it

by MARTIN E. WILLOUGHBY, JR.

B

Chick-Fil-A… Dilemma for Engaging the Culture

By the time this article is out, the furor over Chick-fil-A president Dan Cathy’s statement to the Baptist Press will likely have died down, and the media frenzy will have returned to the presidential election. I candidly did not pay

much attention to the hoopla, as I had previously studied Chick-fil-A as a great example of how to operate an effective organization, and I was well aware of the founder’s beliefs. As a business consultant, I have always been impressed by the talents and friendliness of Chick-fil-A’s employees and the precision of the company’s operations. I have interviewed operators of Chick-fil-A franchises and sought the “secret to their success.” Interestingly, the fundamental reason for the company’s success they shared with me was a philosophy of caring for their employees who in turn care for their customers.

Out of curiosity, I went back and read the interview with the Baptist Press which was fairly typical of interviews I have read in the past with the Cathy family. Cathy’s statement in the interview that he was “guilty as charged” regarding the company’s support of the traditional family is what was frequently quoted in the media. Interestingly, he also went on to say, “We are very much supportive of the family -- the biblical definition of the family unit.

We are a family-owned business, a family-led business, and we are married to our first wives. We give God thanks for that.” Probably not realizing the controversy about to come, Cathy concluded by stating, “We intend to stay the course; We know that it might not be popular with everyone, but thank the Lord, we live in a country where we can share our values and operate on biblical principles.”

One of the most influential business books ever written is Jim Collins’ Good to Great. One of the core principles that Collins shares in his book is to “confront the brutal facts.” Collins encourages business leaders to

deal with their present reality. Similarly, I believe it is important for followers of the way of Jesus to consider the present reality in which we live. As Bob Dylan sang, “The times they are a-changin.” However, they often tend to change slowly. Sometimes, so slow that we don’t even realize things have changed until something dramatic wakes us up to the new reality. As I reflect on the Chick-fil-A hysteria, it is interesting because it is clear that we now live in a society that is quite divided about some very important issues and that there is a definite intolerance for leaders who espouse biblical values.

While this uproar was over the traditional family issue, it certainly could have been over the many other values that the Cathy’s have as Christians and how they operate their business. The basic advice from business pundits to the company was to keep the founders’ opinions to themselves and focus on selling chicken sandwiches. From a business perspective, that is probably good advice— they do make a good chicken sandwich!

However, the dilemma that a follower of Jesus has is that we are not called to keep the Good News to ourselves. As I write, the children’s Bible song “This Little Light of Mine” and the lyrics Hide it under a bushel? No! I’m gonna let it shine, echo in my head. Ultimately, we will all have our day of judgment with our Creator, and I don’t think any of us want to be guilty of not letting the love of God shine through us to help a dark and hurting world. The Cathy family has certainly tried to let their light shine and many people have been blessed because of their faithfulness. May your light shine bright and strong! Y Martin E. Willoughby, Jr,. is Chief Operating Officer of Butler Snow Advisory Services, LLC located in Ridgeland. He and his wife, Nicki, have two children, Ally and Trey, and live in Madison.

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➺modern motherhood

by ROBIN O’BRYANT

I

The Tale of an Anti-Soccer Mom

It happens to me on a regular basis. I push my cart into the grocery store, bribing my three-year-old with my iPhone to sit in the seat. I

chat with her as I wander through the produce section trying to find a banana that’s not the same color as the limes, and I’ll bump into a Mommy acquaintance. We are both a mess wearing faded yoga pants with unwashed hair pulled back in a sloppy ponytail. My youngest daughter, Sadie, has dressed herself: kitten rain boots (90 degrees and sunny), hot pink leotard with rhinestones bedazzled around the neck, and one of her sister’s miniskirts hanging off her hips.

“Hey Robin!” Tired Mommy says.

“Hey! How are you? Where are the rest of your kids?” I’ll ask.

“Oh, soccer practice. Gotta be back at the field in a few minutes. Then pick Princess up from dance. Then we have art tomorrow. And karate. And Boy Scouts. And piano lessons,” and on and on and on it goes.

I usually walk away from these conversations feeling guilty.

Thoughts race through my head. My kids don’t do enough. They aren’t going to know how to do any of that. If they decide they want to play soccer when they are 10 years old, they are already going to be six years behind everyone else.

Last year my five-year-old and my seven-year-old daughters took dance. They seemed to enjoy it throughout the year, but when it came recital time, Emma, my five-year-old, balked. Well, actually, she lost her mind. She threw a fit worthy of Toddlers and Tiaras and refused to put on her clothes to go to the dress rehearsal. My husband was out of town on business, so I called upon the Fount of All Wisdom—my mother.

I explained that Emma had lost her mind and was refusing to put on the most elaborate and sparkly costume I had ever seen. I had paid for her to take dance all year, and now she was refusing to dance.

“I feel like I should make her do it. I’m the adult, right? Doesn’t she need to learn to finish what she started?” I asked.

“But she didn’t start it. You did. You signed her up to see if she liked it, and guess what? She doesn’t. Move on. Nobody cares,” my mother said.

I let Emma off the hook. She held my hand and smiled when we dropped her older sister off at the rehearsal. She practically beamed from her seat as her friends danced on stage, and she watched.

I feel guilty because my kids don’t do enough, then, feel guilty when I make them participate.

I came to the point where I had to make a decision for our family. By the time I pick up my kids from school, I have already gone grocery shopping, cooked dinner, put the baby down for a nap, worked at least a few hours from home, done laundry, and picked up around the house. After school, we barely have time to eat dinner and do homework before it’s time to bathe and get in the bed.

I’ve had to decide what my kids will remember of their childhoods.

I am the anti-soccer mom. I believe in building forts and jumping into creeks. I believe in eating popsicles and letting them drip down your elbows—ruining your good shirt. I believe in spraying the trampoline with a water hose and digging in the dirt for worms. I believe in playing hide and seek until the streetlights come on and your Momma has to call you inside more than once. I believe in making my kids take a bath before dinner because they are so dirty, from simply being kids, that they can’t possibly sit at my table. And I believe in sitting at the table and looking them in the eyes every night instead of chauffeuring them all over town to events they show no interest in.

Aubrey and Emma chose not to take dance again this year. Aubrey asked if she could take piano lessons and I agreed. I asked Emma if there was anything new she would like to try. She tucked herself beside me on the couch and slipped her tiny arm around my neck and whispered, “I just wanna be wif you, Momma.” And that is something we can both be good at. Y Robin O’Bryant is mother to three daughters, wife to one husband, and debut author of Ketchup Is A Vegetable And Other Lies Moms Tell Themselves. She shares the drama and hilarity of motherhood in her syndicated family humor column, “Robin’s Chicks” and on her blog by the same name. (www.robinschicks.com)

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➺the doctor is in

by JACKSON HEART CLINIC

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The mission of the Jackson Heart Foundation is to lead the fight against heart disease in our local community through education, prevention, and early detection. “Heart disease affects millions of people. And now our youngest generation is at risk because of childhood obesity. If we can teach them the importance of making healthy decisions regarding nutrition and exercise, then we will help make a difference in the health of our future generations,” says Dr. Clay Hays.

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♥ Heart disease is the leading cause of death for both men and women. ♥ Over the past few years, there has been a 30% reduction in the cardiovascular death rate, but it is slowly rising again. ♥ Every year about 785,000 Americans have a first heart attack. ♥ In the United States, someone has a heart attack every 34 seconds. ♥ In 2010, heart disease cost the United States around $316.4 billion.

The Jackson Heart Foundation is a nonprofit organization that was founded in August 2009. Mississippi is rated among the highest in the nation with incidences of cardiovascular disease. Because of this statistic, we believe it is vital to the health and well-being of our citizens to educate and encourage healthy lifestyles for our families and to increase awareness in the public about heart disease.

Since 2009, the Jackson Heart Foundation has hosted and/or sponsored the following events and programs: HeartBeats of Jackson, The Youngest Loser, an educational garden with the American Heart Association, Baptist HealthTeacher, Fit for Teaching with Paul Lacoste, and local community health fairs.

HeartBeats of Jackson is our annual

cardiovascular screening that is held at the Trade Mart. This event has touched nearly 1,500 lives in Jackson, MS, and healthcare providers have performed tests costing approximately $1,861,500. Screenings include an EKG, ABI, echocardiogram, lipid panel, and a doctor consultation.

The Youngest Loser is a summer program hosted by the Beyond Therapy Pediatric Group of Ridgeland. The focus is to help obese children lose weight in a healthy manner and maintain a healthy, active lifestyle. Resources for health education throughout the school systems in Mississippi are starting to pick back up. We are working with the Baptist Health Foundation to provide a comprehensive online curriculum resource on health education for grades K-12.

The curriculum will be available to 18 counties and 34 school districts. This curriculum meets national and state health education standards, contains cross-curricular information, has access to numerous background resources and is customizable to each school’s needs. As stated earlier, Mississippi leads the nation in obesity and poor health factors.

The goal of the Fit 4 Series with Paul Lacoste is to take Mississippi out of this category. With success of programs like Fit 4 Change and Fit 4 Teaching, state legislators and teachers have lead the way by losing over 10,000 pounds. Another goal of the Fit 4 Teaching is to reach Mississippians that would otherwise not be able to afford and experience the benefits of a fitness program.

In order to continue to host/support these programs the Jackson Heart Foundation will host its second annual Young at Heart Gala on September 29, 2012. How can you help? Come join us for a fun-filled night of entertainment by Meet The Press, an exciting drawdown, and fabulous foods and beverages. To purchase tickets, please contact the Jackson Heart Foundation at 601-718-5172. Y

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➺education connection INTERVIEW WITH

Todd Mitchell, Headmaster of The Veritas School They enjoy singing and chanting and are given opportunities to memorize all types of facts in math, history, grammar, Bible, and Latin. These facts are the basic building blocks inherent in each subject. Logic students (Grades 7-8) like to contradict their elders, they love to argue, they enjoy pointing out our mistakes, and they enjoy challenging discussions with no easy solution.

These students are ripe for instruction and training in formal logic. Rhetoric stage students (Grades 9-12 ) begin to show signs of expression and creativity. These students are anxious to achieve independence and long to express themselves. At The Veritas School, they are taught to communicate eloquently and persuasively through instruction in rhetoric.

With a careful focus on curriculum selection and instruction, classical Christian educators teach “with the grain” of the child so that they inherit the tools to learn on their own.

MCL: Tell us a little about your background, education, and your family.

I grew up in Montgomery, Alabama, and am moving to Jackson from Panama City, Florida.

My wife Tricia and I have six children, four of whom will be attending Veritas this year. I am a graduate of Troy State University, served three years active duty in the Army, and earned a Master’s of Divinity at Mid-America Seminary in Memphis. I have served on the staff of churches in Tennessee, Georgia, and Florida. I served Covenant Christian School of Panama City for three years before I was introduced to The Veritas School. I entered the field of education out of a desire to see my own children educated in a classical Christian school. I am currently working toward a second Master’s Degree in Independent School Administration at Delta State University.

MCL: How do you incorporate your faith into your everyday roles?

Great question! While most of our world is seeking to compartmentalize all areas of life, I believe it is important to integrate our Christian worldview in all areas of learning. This integration is one of the major distinctions of classical Christian education. We begin each day at The Veritas School with “Morning Meeting.”

This is a time that we gather for prayer, worship, and a short devotion from the Bible. The beauty 20 SEPTEMBER 2012 ❘ Metro Christian Living

of The Veritas School is that in every class, every teacher incorporates their faith by connecting the truth of the lesson to the truth of the gospel.

MCL: What inspired you to become the headmaster at The Veritas School?

I believe my family and I were called by God to join The Veritas School. With a similar vision for education and a desire to utilize a classical Christian method of instruction, we believed TVS to be a great fit for the future of our family.

We are joining them to equip a new generation of leaders to think and live biblically.

MCL: What is a classical education?

It is important to note that The Veritas School provides a classical Christian education.

The word classical refers to the methodology, structure, and form of the education, as well as the content of the studies. Most modern education focuses on teaching subjects. While classical educators do teach a variety of subjects, the focus is on teaching students the tools of learning in preparation for further study of subjects after high school. At The Veritas School, we strive to take advantage of the natural inclinations of our students at their respective stages of development to maximize learning. For example, grammar students (K5–Grade 6) find it easy and fun to memorize.

MCL: What makes The Veritas School unique?

The Veritas School has a Christ-centered mission set on developing Christian thinkers and leaders, and we do this using a unique, yet time-tested approach to education. While classical education is unique to Veritas in the Jackson metro area, it is not a fad or the trendy model of the day. America’s forefathers were classically trained and some of the greatest minds in history were brought up in a classical tradition. Researching to discover more about classical Christian education is a worthy investment for any parent desiring the best education possible for their child.

MCL: What are your future plans for The Veritas School?

My future plan for The Veritas School is to stay the course. I desire to partner with parents in raising the next generation of leaders through classical Christian education. Perpetuating this vision will help us to develop Christian thinkers who will lead both culturally and spiritually as they mature.

MCL: Is there anything else you would like to share?

For families interested in learning more about our vision, they can contact the school office to receive a free DISCOVER book on classical Christian education. It is our gift to inquiring parents. Y

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➺outside in

by SHAWN DEAN

The Smell of Football ah…that smell. The smell of an aged-leather football. The first drift of the cool fall air passing by brings with it the aroma of football, and not just any ole football, SEC football. The grills crank up on Saturday, and the chatter goes back and forth as the rivals sink their teeth into the delicate parts. The drummers drum, the boys play, and the girls cheer. It tarries far too long, and it ends in a flash, but at last, it’s here.

“Football is an incredible game.

Sometimes it’s so incredible, it’s unbelievable,” said Tom Landry, legendary coach of the Cowboys.

What makes it that way is that it’s an arena where men can apply every attribute of character and skill to a particular craft. It’s physical, but its physicality is wasted without intellect, its intellect is wasted without the human will, and in the end, all of it is somehow swallowed up by fate and circumstance. But, what makes the game so great for those that play it are the relationships; they’re built on hardship, trial, sweat, and pain. And, when there’s victory, it satisfies.

That concentrated effort to a common goal creates an opportunity for relationship, and the common goal being a good one nurtures deeper relationships.

“Football is a great deal like life in that it teaches that work, sacrifice, perseverance, competitive drive, selflessness, and respect for authority is the price that each and every one of us must pay to achieve any goal that is

A

22 SEPTEMBER 2012 ❘ Metro Christian Living

worthwhile.” Vince Lombardi had it right.

The dynamics of football can be easily compared to the church. Passion for both run to extremes, and zealousness of beliefs separate and divide causing rivalry. Each church waves its banner just as each team wears its colors. Worth is proven in results.

The right way is argued by the fruit it bears.

Denominations don’t strive to be competitive with one another, but the reality is that they are, like it or not, in a competitive situation.

It puzzles me that in this modern era of high productivity, efficiencies of time, and the ability to communicate globally and instantly, that as a church, from my point of view, we’ve not faired very well on the field of play. And, when you add in the caveat that there are more than 50 churches in Madison County, the situation is even more perplexing. I could, with ease, fill the rest of this column with the statistical facts, but I’ll digress.

The question an SEC football teams asks is, “How do we win a national championship with what we have to work with?” The question pastors and churches ask frequently is, “How do we most effectively reach the lost and equip the saved in this era we live in?” For a football team, the destination is clear and specific: a national championship. But for a church, not so clear.

What I mean is, how equipped is equipped and how many lost people are we talking about? Are we looking for 15% growth this year or are we looking to save every single human being in Madison County this year? Based solely on results,

it’s apparent to me that we don’t yet know how to win championships.

When we’re commanded to love our neighbor, to what extreme does that mean and how dirty do we get in the affairs of another?

When we’re called to pray, how many hours or years of prayer are we talking about? What about fasting?

Were I a theologian or philosopher or prophet, maybe I’d have answers suitable, but I’m a regular guy, a layman. He hasn’t called me to full-time ministry in the non-secular world. However, I am called to full-time ministry in my realm of influence and it’s from that approach that I yearn for answers.

The one thing I do feel certain about is that I’ve got to be all in with Jesus and join efforts with the others that are all in. I need to be sure that I’ve weighed the cost and that my family understands it, as much as that’s possible for us. And, maybe the Lord will fill in the blanks to those intimate details.

Coach Lombardi also said, “Once you agree upon the price you and your family must pay for success, it enables you to ignore the minor hurts, the opponent’s pressure and the temporary failures.”

Aah…football and Jesus. Y Shawn Dean is Regional Sales Manager for Airflo Sales, Inc., located in Ridgeland, MS. He and his wife, Laura Beth, have three children, Isabelle, Ann Mabry, and Mary Frances. They live in Madison.

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➺salt & light

by KIMBERLY GRACE BOWMAN

Wellsfest 2012 Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony. – Colossians 3:14

arly fall is a great time in the Jackson, Since the first WellsFest in Mississippi, area to take part in Jackson’s 1984, the annual tradition has first ever festival which celebrates twentybecome a “must-do” item in nine years this September and offers an 2012 Jackson to have fun and help a affordable avenue for family fun. Not only is this a well-needed organization. great recreational event, but WellsFest donates all Created in 1984, Wells proceeds to a particular organization each year. This United Methodist Church’s year, WellsFest will sponsor the Farish Street YMCA in vision for WellFest has been providing an updated and working playground for inner“to help some deserving local city children. service organization, to provide WellsFest was first created in 1984 by Wells WellsFest Art Night is a place where people can have United Methodist Church. Wells United Methodist Tuesday, Sept. 25, at fun and enjoy good music in a drug and alcohol-free Duling Hall, 622 Duling Church organized in 1926 in response to the growth of environment,” and “to show that God’s love can bring Avenue. This event is free the Northwest Jackson area and the lack of a this community together in support of a worthy cause.” and includes refreshments And the vision has continued into what will be the Methodist church. and live music. The Under the leadership of Reverend C.E. Downer, the twenty-ninth WellsFest on September 29, 2012. preview party begins at church began with 76 charter members. After the need WellsFest will feature many different activities for all 5:30 p.m., and the live art for a larger church building became apparent, they ages and especially families. Commencement of events auction at 7 p.m. received permission to congregate at Galloway School “The annual art sale and begins first on Tuesday, September 25 at the WellsFest after appealing to the city. But even larger growth Art Night with the previews beginning at 5:30 p.m. until 7 auction that is a part of prompted the decision to build a permanent church p.m., and with the live auction starting immediately WellsFest will again have building that would house its members. In 1927, the afterwards at 7 p.m. its own venue this year,” ground-breaking ceremony was held at the present-day The main events of the following Saturday will take said Brenda Ferguson, location on the corner of Bailey Avenue and Glendale. place at the Jamie Fowler Boyll Park. Events will begin at chair of this year’s Many donations and help followed as the church was WellsFest.“This way the art 8 a.m. with the 5k Run and Walk (sponsored by Blue under construction. sale and auction are not Cross Blue Shield of Mississippi) and a 1-mile Fun Run at When the suggested name of Glendale Methodist competing with the 9 a.m. Also at 9 a.m., there will be a Pet Parade festival’s music. Having a Church was proposed, the congregation approved it. accompanied by the blessing of the pets. separate event from the And that name would stand for almost 20 years, when The enjoyable tone of WellsFest is set with continuous festival allows art patrons the name would be changed to Wells United live music throughout the day. Children can enjoy and WellsFest supporters to climbing a rock wall, riding ponies, and other fun Methodist Church in honor of the late Pastor J.A. enjoy WellsFest Art Night Wells, who served for 15 years as Pastor of Glendale children’s events. All visitors can also enjoy many activities on Tuesday before the Methodist Church. including a silent auction, various arts and crafts vendor festival, and then come to Since then, Wells United Methodist Church has had booths, a plant sale, plus foods and concessions. One of the festival on Saturday at six other pastors who would each lend to the mission of the best parts is that there is no admission charge. From Jamie Fowler Boyll Park the church of being a place for the community. But and not have to juggle their 8 a.m. until 5:30 p.m., visitors can experience fun and during that time, growth diminished and less people family-friendly activities which exclude no one. The entire love for music and art.” began to join the church. After current Pastor Keith community is welcomed.

Admission to both is free.

Tonkel’s initiation in 1969, growth returned under his For more information about Wells United Methodist vision—which was to be salt and light and welcome Church, visit their website at www.wellschurch.org or call everyone in the community by “seeking opportunities to promote racial 601-353-0658. For further information about WellsFest, visit harmony in the heart of Mississippi.” www.wellsfest.org or call the church’s number above. Y Over the years, Wells United Methodist Church grew in numbers and was expanded along with its growth. In 1984, renovation efforts began.

Kimberly Grace Bowman resides in Florence, Mississippi, and is a And at the same time, a friend to the church proposed to form an event junior in high school through A Beka Academy homeschooling.

Contact her at kimberlygraceb@gmail.com. to increase funds for the project. The church liked the idea, yet they wanted instead to donate the money to benefit another organization.

E

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â&#x17E;şthink tank

by ANDY WIMBERLY

Then What?

everal years ago riding in my car on the way to a golf game, I was listening to an audio tape by teaching pastor John Ortberg. It was obviously several years ago by the fact it was an audio tape, not a CD, iPhone, or iPod. The name of the tape was, It All Goes Back in the Box. Since then

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that message has become a best seller in hardback book form. Pick up a copy.

Toward the end of his talk, he talked about when we reach the level of success that weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve always dreamed ofâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;being the manager of our division, the president of the company, the biggest producer in our firm, have the financial security that weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve dreamed and worked years for, or reached a level of success that puts you as the best of the best. Ortberg then said, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Once you reach that top level, the highest rung on your success ladder; ask yourself a two word question, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Then what?â&#x20AC;?

Personal confession time. For 30 plus years, I wanted to be the number one producer with the financial institution I was associated with. Some years we would be number 40, number 10, and one year was number three. But it wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t number one, and I was never personally satisfied. I was passionately driven to be number one, and pretty much anything that

Speaking as an experienced egomaniac, the sales awards get tarnished, the big fancy offices grow old and cold, and life in pursuit of getting to the top ainâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t all that much fun. got in my way had to be dealt with. Then on the audio in my car that day, the question came as clear, precise and stinging as anything in my life. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Andy, once you have become the #1 producer in your firm, then what?â&#x20AC;?

What is the next rung on your ladder when you have reached the top one?

Once youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve reached your goal, then what? Set higher goals? It was like an addiction for me, no matter how much success, no matter how much money, it was never enough. Someone asked John Rockefeller how much money is enough? His answer, â&#x20AC;&#x153;just a little bit moreâ&#x20AC;?

I remember pulling my car to the side of the road and started thinking about and rehashing the last 20 years. I had given so much effort to my success journey that a lot of damage had been left in my wake. Time with my family, time to keep physically fit, time to just be alone with myself and

time reading my Bible and building a relationship with JESUS. Didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have time for all of that; I was on a mission.

Speaking as an experienced egomaniac, the sales awards get tarnished, the big fancy offices grow old and cold, and life in pursuit of getting to the top ainâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t all that much fun. Once we get there, and when our dream comes true, sometimes they donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t look like the dreams that we wanted when we started.

Quoting Max Lucado: â&#x20AC;&#x153;What we hope will bring life brings limited amountsâ&#x20AC;Śthree fiftyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s worth.â&#x20AC;? We connect with a career; find meaning in family, yet long for something more. As a nine year old on Christmas morning Max assembled a miniature train set, complete flashing lights, battery powered engine and plenty of track. He placed the locomotive on the track and watched in sheer glee as three pounds of pure steel wound its way across his bedroom floor. Around and around and aroundâ&#x20AC;Ś aroundâ&#x20AC;Śand around. After a while he picked it up and turned it in the other direction. It went around and around and around...and around. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Mom, what else did you get me for Christmas?â&#x20AC;?

How about you? What wall is your ladder leaning against? Are you getting bored and tired of watching â&#x20AC;&#x153;your locomotiveâ&#x20AC;? go around and aroundâ&#x20AC;Śand around?

This Monthâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Challenge What are your top four priorities in life? Whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s most important to you: family, business, health, faith, activities, travel or hobbies? Write the top four down in the order of importance. Use the table provided to truthfully answer four questions about each priority. An example is in RED (opposite page).

While doing this exercise, be brutally honest with yourself. You are the only one that will probably ever see it. Each month refer back to this table and update it.

Here comes the fun part. After doing this exercise for a few times, ask yourself the â&#x20AC;&#x153;THEN WHATâ&#x20AC;? question. You will be amazed at the direction, vision, and clarity for your life that will come.

Try it. After all, we are all here for just a short time anyway; letâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s make the most of it for our LORD, our families, and ourselves. Y Wimberly & Associates provides executive coaching and financial advising. They use The Discovery Process TM for clearer thinking to assist people and businesses in transition and in life. andy@thediscoveryprocess.com

Â&#x2018;Â&#x201D;

Â&#x201E;Â&#x2018;Â&#x2014;Â&#x2013; Â&#x2013;Â&#x2018; Â&#x2018;Â&#x17D;Â&#x17D; Â&#x2DC;Â&#x2021;Â&#x201D; Â&#x192;Â?Â&#x2020; Â&#x17D;Â&#x192;Â&#x203A; Â&#x2021;Â&#x192;Â&#x2020;ÇŤ Â&#x2021;Â&#x192;Â&#x201D;Â? Â&#x2013;Â&#x160;Â&#x2021; Â&#x192;Â&#x2C6;Â&#x2021; Â&#x192;Â?Â&#x2020; Â&#x2021;Â&#x2026;Â&#x2014;Â&#x201D;Â&#x2021; Â&#x192;Â&#x203A; Â&#x2013;Â&#x2018; Â&#x192;Â&#x201D;Â? Â&#x2013;Â&#x2018;Â&#x2026;Â? Â&#x192;Â&#x201D;Â?Â&#x2021;Â&#x2013; Â&#x2039;Â?Â?Â&#x2021;Â&#x2020; Â&#x2021;Â&#x2013;Â&#x2014;Â&#x201D;Â?Â&#x2022; Â&#x2039;Â&#x2013;Â&#x160;Â&#x2018;Â&#x2014;Â&#x2013; Â&#x192;Â&#x201D;Â?Â&#x2021;Â&#x2013; Â&#x2039;Â&#x2022;Â? Â&#x2013;Â&#x2018; Â&#x2018;Â&#x2014;Â&#x201D; Â&#x201D;Â&#x2039;Â?Â&#x2026;Â&#x2039;Â&#x2019;Â&#x192;Â&#x17D;Ǥ Â&#x192;Â&#x17D;Â&#x17D; Â&#x2018;Â&#x2122; Â&#x2C6;Â&#x2018;Â&#x201D; Â&#x2018;Â&#x201D;Â&#x2021; Â?Â&#x2C6;Â&#x2018;Â&#x201D;Â?Â&#x192;Â&#x2013;Â&#x2039;Â&#x2018;Â?

Ǥ Ǥ ÇŻ Â&#x2039;Â&#x201D;Â&#x2021; Â&#x2039;Â?Â&#x192;Â?Â&#x2026;Â&#x2039;Â&#x192;Â&#x17D; Â&#x2021;Â&#x201D;Â&#x2DC;Â&#x2039;Â&#x2026;Â&#x2021;Â&#x2022; 1.800.844.3254 26 SEPTEMBER 2012 â?&#x2DC; Metro Christian Living

Top Four Priorities in your life

Reason why it is important to you

What are you doing to grow, protect and maintain this priority?

What further progress do you want to make?

Name one specific action for you to make further progress with this priority

EXAMPLE:

I want my faith to be the center of all I do and think.

Reading the Bible, praying more, and trying to follow what Jesus wants.

Start really following what Jesus wants!

Get an accountability partner next week.

My Faith

metrochristianliving.com â?&#x2DC; SEPTEMBER 2012 27

28 SEPTEMBER 2012 â?&#x2DC; Metro Christian Living

Tyrone Keys A Legacy of Faith, Hope, and Love

by PEGGY WALL AND BARBARA HAMILTON

yrone Keys is not average—not in his size, not in his character, and certainly not in his commitment. A poet once wrote, “The measure of a man is not in his living; the measure of a man can be found in his giving.” And Tyrone has given much. After a career in the NFL, Tyrone founded All Sports Community Service (ASCS), a mentorship and scholarship program in Tampa, Florida. Through ASCS, he has bought into the hopes and dreams of other people and has left a giant handprint etched into the fabric of countless lives. “My ultimate goal in life all along,” he says, “has been to help young people the way my teachers and coaches helped me.”

Tyrone recalls how his call to service was first kindled in 1968. It was the evening of Dr. Martin Luther King’s assassination, and the stories of Dr. King and his speeches ran on television all day long. The words from Dr. King that stuck in eight-year-old Tyrone’s mind were these: “It’s not the color of your skin, but the content of your character,” and “Everyone can be great because everyone can serve.” He wanted to serve.

Tyrone’s first opportunity to serve came when, as a fourth grader, he was selected to be a patrol officer at Dawson Elementary School. He shared a post at the corner of Queens Road and Sunset with another young student named Artis Rouser and the two of them enjoyed the responsibility of helping their fellow students cross the street. To this pair, they were living out Dr. King’s words that “Anyone can be great because everyone can serve.”

Another defining moment for Tyrone occurred during his sixth grade year. The year was 1970, and Jackson schools were being integrated.

Mary Hagan was the first white teacher at all-black Dawson. “She was the first white person I had ever spoken to,” Tyrone remembers. On the first day of school their new teacher told them they were all going to be just fine. She told them it was good to have dreams, and they could accomplish those dreams, for they had talents and abilities and a special purpose in life.

“No teacher had ever told us that before,” Tyrone says, “but we believed her.” Mrs. Hagan planted possibilities in Tyrone’s mind, and he never forgot them.

Mary Hagan displayed such courage as she entered the school each day in the face of adversity and jeers from those who wanted to impede progress. Her gracious resolve made a huge impact on young Tyrone.

He never forgot her scampering around the playground, trying to convince the boys she knew football. “She didn’t know the game,” Tyrone laughs, “but boy, did she know how to connect with her

T

Awards/Achievements

High School All American – Callaway High School, Jackson, Mississippi Keyboardist for “The Super Bowl Shuffle” Super Bowl XX Champions/Chicago Bears Founder, All Sports Community Service, Tampa, Florida Alumnus of the Year, College of Education – Mississippi State University Honoree at the White House for his mentoring program Feature in People Magazine SEC Story of Character Award Recognition by the White House again for mentoring Hall of Fame – Mississippi State University Mississippi Sports Hall of Fame Tampa’s Man of the Year (twice)

students. She was willing to invest love in her students, and that investment has made all the difference in the world to me,” he says.

On the last day of school, Mrs. Hagan recited a poem entitled, “What is Love?” She mentioned in her poem that Love is when one of her students comes to visit. Nearly forty years later, Tyrone reconnected with Mrs. Hagan and shared their story with over 500 educators at the Teacher of the Year Dinner in her hometown of Baton Rouge.

Mentors Other Mary Hagan wasn’t the only teacher to leave a lasting impression on Tyrone. His high school football coach at Callaway, Odell Jenkins, also saw something special in him. Not only did he make sure Tyrone played his best on the field, but he held him accountable for the way he conducted himself off the field as well. Tyrone credits Jenkins with developing in him a true appreciation of character and commitment. “He once told me, ‘Sow a thought . . . reap a word. Sow a word . . . reap an action. Sow an action . . . reap a destiny. Sow a destiny . . . reap a character.’ That advice has influenced the way I’ve tried to structure my life.”

Coach Jenkins was instrumental in Tyrone’s scholarship offer to Mississippi State, and he shared his belief in the importance of mentoring. He told Tyrone his success meant nothing if he didn’t return to help someone else. “I knew what he meant,” Tyrone says, “because he always wanted me to understand that I had a duty to help my fellow students who were struggling. But I had no idea that philosophy would be where I would ultimately find God’s purpose for my life.”

metrochristianliving.com ❘ SEPTEMBER 2012 29

The Keys family: Daughter Chyla, wife Bessie Ruth, Son Tyrone, Jr., and Tyrone

Godly mentors like Mary Hagan and Odell Jenkins encouraged Tyrone to accomplish things that were before, only dreams in a kid’s heart. They planted seeds of love and compassion. They helped him, pushed him, and inspired him. Most of all, they believed in him, and he will be the first to tell you that’s something you can’t put a price tag on.

At Mississippi State, Tyrone did his best to honor the faith and love his family, coaches, and teachers had placed in him, and he was determined to do his best for his team and the university. He was recognized and honored for his outstanding play as a defensive lineman and was selected All-SEC for three years. Later Tyrone would win his most treasured award, the SEC Story of Character Award. But those honors are not what he remembers most.

The greatest and most indelible memory Tyrone has of his college career is the Mississippi State-Alabama game of 1980 when the Crimson Tide, sporting a 22-game winning streak and a national number one ranking, pulled into Memorial Stadium in Jackson. With only twenty-two seconds left in the game, State led 6-3, but Alabama was on State’s fouryard line. When the ball was snapped, Tyrone slammed into the quarterback and jarred the ball loose. State recovered the fumble and preserved one of the greatest upsets ever in collegiate football.

But to Tyrone, what happened after the game completely eclipsed anything that had occurred during it. “The door to our locker room opened, and in walked Bear Bryant. The room grew quiet, and what followed,” Tyrone recalls, “was the greatest example of character and sportsmanship I had ever witnessed. With a thousand fans jeering at him, he walked all the way across the field to congratulate not just our coach, but our team. Now that was class.”

Bear Bryant never knew the impact of his gesture of respect that day, but Tyrone savored the moment and safely tucked it away, determined his life would display the same qualities he had witnessed in that locker room.

the Life Lessons Translating In the spring of 1981 the New York Jets drafted Tyrone, but he opted instead to play in the Canadian Football League. Two years later he was signed by the Chicago Bears. “I felt like I was on top of the world with 30 SEPTEMBER 2012 ❘ Metro Christian Living

the Bears. We were treated like royalty by the people of Chicago and the Bear organization, and quite honestly, we thought we deserved it because we were good—really good.” But on a Monday night the Miami Dolphins soundly defeated the undefeated Bears on national television, and suddenly they weren’t so invincible any more.

After the game, Coach Ditka told the team they could let the defeat eat away at them, or they could use it as a springboard for a great comeback. The decision was theirs. They finished the season without another loss and defeated the New England Patriots 46-10 in the Super Bowl. They even found time to record the rap video, The Super Bowl Shuffle, which helped get their swagger back while entertaining America and raising over $300 thousand dollars for needy families in the Chicago area. (Incidentally, you can view the Shuffle on YouTube. Tyrone is a great keyboardist!)

Tyrone often shares that experience with kids because he believes they need to know that everyone has setbacks. The important thing is what happens next. They can resent them, become angry, blame someone else, or they can make up their minds to turn those negative setbacks into positive comebacks. He adds, “I like to tell them about Peter, who thought he was the most faithful follower of Jesus. Yet, in a moment of weakness, the Bible says Peter denied even knowing Jesus. A setback of gigantic proportions! But he worked at it, turned that mistake around, and became the rock Jesus used to build his church on. What a comeback!”

Tyrone knows that kids need to hear truths like that and understand Peter was not trapped in a black hole...and neither are they. There is a way out, but it’s up to them. Like the Bears, they can completely reverse a devastating setback.

When most players and fans celebrated after the Super Bowl game, Tyrone found himself walking down a street in New Orleans thinking about being a champion at the pinnacle of his career and having done what thousands of players had only dreamed about. But something was missing. “I should have been dancing down that street,” he says, “but there I was just walking...and thinking.” At that moment a thought pierced his mind, A Super Bowl is just a Super Bowl. There is more, much more to life!

“I realized God had just spoken to me and had introduced me to His vision for my life, but I knew if He wanted us to be on the same page, He’d have to give me a clearer picture than that.”

By the next year Tyrone was no longer a Chicago Bear but a Tampa Bay Buccaneer—from the best team in football to the worst—as in a record of 18-1 to a record of 2-14. “I felt a lot like Abraham. God called him to leave his home, his comfort, wealth and security and go to a place he’d never heard of, to people who could offer him nothing.” The only thing Tyrone had to stand on was the seed of faith that had been planted in him years before. At that point, he hoped it was enough.

It was in Tampa that he began to follow in his mother’s footsteps and began teaching in the off season.

His career in Tampa Bay lasted only two seasons before he was traded to San Diego. The scripture Proverbs 19:21 says, “There are many purposes in a man’s heart, but the counsel of the Lord shall stand.” The Lord’s counsel and plan for Tyrone were just beginning to unfold. A career ending injury forced Tyrone’s retirement in 1990. He headed back to Tampa with the feeling God was moving him toward teaching, counseling, and coaching.

“I remembered the coaches I had in high school, and I wanted to be just like them. I wanted to love kids the way they did and be a positive influence on them.”

Front row: Johnnie Ruth Keys, Tyrone Keys (center).

Shelton Keyes.

Back row: MSU Coach Denny Aldridge and Callaway HS Coach Odell Jenkins.

to Mentoring TheHeCall must have done something right, for soon kids

Tyrone is honored by MSU School of Education as Alumnus of the Year.

Left to Right: Coach Randall, Callaway HS Coach Jenkins, Trainer Strat Karratassos, English teacher Mrs. Minchew, mother Johnnie Ruth Keys, and daughter Chyla.

The 1985 Chicago Super Bowl Champs held a 25th reunion at The White House in 2011.

Their first reception was cancelled following the Challenger disaster.

from all over Tampa were seeking his help and advice on how to get to college by way of a scholarship—the only way disadvantaged kids with their background could even think about college. Most were from poor, broken homes, rough neighborhoods, and an Tyrone reunites with his sixth-grade environment where “success” was a strange, unfamiliar teacher, Mrs. Hagan word. The parents were largely uneducated so the kids (center) 40 years had been taught to “settle,” and the cycle of despair later. was never broken but repeated over and over.

One such kid was Albert Perry, an outstanding high school football player in Tampa with the potential of playing big time on the college level. He desperately wanted to play ball and escape his hopeless The Bears celebrate dealership to thank Ulm for his generosity and was told that environment. Tyrone helped the boy with his their victory over New Ulm was in the hospital. Tyrone sat in the showroom and wrote admissions application, made a highlight film of his England in 1985. him a letter of gratitude for showing the three young men that games, and worked to get him a scholarship to Texas people cared about them. Later that week Tyrone got a call from Jerry Southern University. What Tyrone didn’t know was that the boy didn’t Ulm, Jr. He mentioned that his dad had read Tyrone’s letter. He then have a way to get there so he never went. said that his dad had passed away and that the family thought so much On April 25, 1993 at a block party in a housing project, Albert of what Tyrone was doing that in lieu of flowers they asked that all playfully squirted someone with a water gun. That someone pulled a real dealerships in the Southeast, family and friends, send their memorial gun and fired. Albert was struck in the back as he tried to get away. He gifts to Tyrone’s organization. At that time Tyrone did not have a died on the way to the hospital. “Nothing in my life had ever affected foundation, but this action on the part of the Ulm family sparked the me so profoundly,” Tyrone recalls. “What else could I have done? It was interest of many people in the Tampa area. the defining moment in my life when I realized something had to be Tyrone attended the funeral service, and his life has never been the done. I knew the reclaiming of young lives had to start somewhere, so it same. As Jerry Ulm, Jr. gave the eulogy, he spoke about a man who had might as well start with me.” come into his dad’s life that summer, and as he was speaking, Tyrone But Tyrone didn’t know how, and he didn’t know where. God had all felt the atmosphere changing. Jerry began to read a letter, Tyrone’s the answers, so Tyrone knew he had to place his trust in Him for letter. Tyrone realized that the power of love—the love of God and the wisdom and guidance. Jerry Ulm, Sr., owner of Jerry Ulm Dodge in love of others—is what we all must have to fulfill our destiny.

Tampa, heard about Tyrone’s commitment to youth and wanted to help some of the students with summer jobs. The only requirement was that All Sports Community Service they, too, would serve as mentors. Ulm hired three students that Because of the generosity and encouragement of the Ulm family, All summer: T.J. Lewis, who later graduated from Queens College and Sports Community Service, ASCS, was founded in 1993. What Tyrone became a Vice President of Bank of America; Eric Hayes, who has learned on his quest is that everyone is born with a dream and each graduated from the University of Baltimore and became head basketball of us has a distinct design. Tyrone blocked a lot of passes fulfilling a coach in Pasco County, Florida; and Jerald Mack, who later received a childhood dream of success in football, but God had a unique dream or degree from the University of Phoenix and has now provided a group vision to give purpose and meaning to his quest for real and true home for disadvantaged adults in the Tampa area. success. He learned that people have been assigned by God to help Ulm and Tyrone got to know each other. Tyrone saw Ulm’s each other. Who could have known that at the same time Tyrone had a compassion and love, and Ulm saw Tyrone’s. Ulm gave Tyrone a check vision of mentoring at-risk students, Coach Kenneth Muldrow, a coach which became seed money for the mentoring program. Summer ended at Tampa’s Blake High School whom Tyrone had met in 1987, had the and the three students made it safely to college. Tyrone stopped by the

metrochristianliving.com ❘ SEPTEMBER 2012 31

same vision? God brought them together, and ASCS became a hub of the Blake campus.

Longtime friend and college roommate, Mike McEnany, said, “Tyrone finds kids sleeping in cars, and the next thing you know they are graduating from college.” Tyrone has a God-given gift of knowing who to help and how to help. For Tyrone, help began at Dawson Elementary in 1970, then Callaway in 1975, Mississippi State University in 1980 and the Chicago Bears in 1985. Through those years he realized that our dreams will be tested for authenticity to make sure we are up to the task.

We must learn to let the opposition strengthen us, not stop us.

Students of today can reach out and grab hold of a life of great possibilities, but they have to be shown how. At ASCS they are encouraging students by helping them “thrive” not “strive.” Failure should not be normal. Mediocrity should not be acceptable. ASCS wants the young people not only to succeed but also to return to their roots and mentor the next generation. That’s the way it has played out in Tyrone’s life. He has found that real greatness is a matter of integrity, work ethic, treatment of others, right motives, and a level of initiative. It also has to do with a person’s character, contributions, talents, creativity, and discipline. Tyrone believes your character represents who you are every day—not just who you are when you earn a temporary achievement.

Tyrone started out helping three young men get summer jobs. All the while he talked with them about their goals, their dreams and how to reach them. He used the same words, the same methods that Mrs. Hagan and Coach Jenkins used with him. The words and methods worked. Why? Because the words of love, faith, and encouragement are timeless. Tyrone uses those words often when he comes back to the Jackson area in speaking to church and civic groups. He continues to reach out to needy students at Dawson Elementary by providing backpacks and school supplies. Beyond that, his future goal is to replicate the Tampa foundation in Jackson and across America.

From helping three young people, ASCS has now helped over 1,000 students go to college with scholarships totaling over $22 million. Many of the ASCS alumni have given back with scholarship money for the next round of student applicants. The blessing of this approach is that students who never saw college as an option are now college graduates.

Students who came from disadvantaged living environments are now homeowners and business leaders.

Some have even started foundations of their own to help the next generation of students achieve success. In the end, Dr. Martin Luther King echoed the words of Jesus when he said, “ But the greatest among you shall be your servant.” (Matthew 23:11). Jesus often referred to having faith, even if only the size of a mustard seed. Having faith gives us the foundation we need to thrive. He also spoke of the importance of providing fertile soil to nurture the seed of faith. Who does the planting?

We do. Who does the nurturing? We, in partnership with God, do. Who provides the increase, the fruit? He does. What does the fruit provide?

New seeds. The process is simple. God never intended it to be difficult.

And Tyrone also states it simply: “I’ve spent half of my life playing football because someone saw some potential in me, and I’ve spent another 20 years seeking out the potential in others, namely at-risk kids.

To me, these kids represent endless possibilities. Within each one of them there is tremendous power waiting to be unleashed. I’ve found nothing more gratifying than to see a student finally come into his own.

It’s possible for anyone with a big enough dream and a strong faith in God to accomplish unbelievable results.” Can he have an “Amen”? Y To find out more about Tyrone Keys and All Sports Community Service, visit his website: www.allsportscommunity.org or “friend” Tyrone on Facebook at Tyrone P. Keys.

32 SEPTEMBER 2012 ❘ Metro Christian Living

The Story Behind the Story…

by PEGGY WALL AND BARBARA HAMILTON

Taking a 12-hour driving trip from Jackson, Mississippi, to Tampa, Florida, is a family vacation—right? Well, maybe, but not this time. This was a working trip, two authors off to see the wizard. We were following the yellow brick 4-lane highway to Tampa in search of a story. onths ago we met Tyrone Keys, former NFL great, in Jackson, Mississippi—our mutual hometown. Though we enjoy watching football, it is definitely not our point of expertise. So when the subject turned to writing a book about a football player and his foundation, at least it helped that one of us had attended Mississippi State University, Tyrone’s alma mater. As our profession, we write inspirational books. Here we are—two white women preparing to write a story about an African American, 6’7” giant-of-a-man. We laugh and say we spend most of our time talking to his belt buckle. And so we began this 12-month journey with Tyrone. No, let me correct that. He insists the story is not to be about him. We decided to let him think that way while we were, in fact, framing the story around him.

Though his football life began at age 14 at a middle school in Jackson and later continued at Mississippi State University, his notoriety came as a team member of the infamous 1985 Super Bowl Champions, the Chicago Bears.

Following his success with the Bears, Tyrone played for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers and eventually made Tampa his home. Wondering what life had in store for him, Tyrone began teaching at Leto High School in 1992. Ever conscious of the students who were in and out of his classes and on the playing field, Tyrone was able in a unique way to identify the potential in these kids who had basically nothing going for them. They usually came from broken homes, lived at or below the

M

Wright & Ferguson Funeral Home poverty line, and had no idea where their lives could go. College was definitely not on their radar. With a chance meeting in the school hallway or on the school campus, Tyrone’s eyes would meet the eyes of the student and immediately a connection was made. One by one the students were identified, their dreams were outlined, and a plan for their future was started. Using the assistance of other coaches and teachers in the Hillsborough County School System, Tyrone went about finding a way for his mission and a way for the future of the students.

With a little bit of help from other NFL teammates and a couple of local sponsors, Tyrone formed All Sports Community Service (ASCS), a non-profit mentoring program for struggling students. The program was available to male and female students, athletes and non-athletes.

With a keen sense of judgment, Tyrone started identifying students who could participate in the All Sports program..

We made the 12-hour drive to interview a group of former students who had actually managed to escape low-income neighborhoods and the ugliness of their past to find a better future, a better life for themselves through their participation in the All Sports regimen. Their stories were touching, even gripping. And they were all inspiring. The stories are to be incorporated into our upcoming book.

As we listened, we were totally transported to their world—to be more exact, the world from which they had come. We marveled at their strength and determination and were impressed beyond words as they shared their hearts and such sensitive parts of their lives. We were moved to tears, and we were truly blessed.

Since 1993 the All Sports family tree (we refer to it as such because they truly are family) has so many branches that we can hardly count them. Tyrone, however, has done an amazing job of keeping in up with all of his “children”. He says it best, “The key is to have them give back, and to know what it feels like to help someone else who needs help. We help a kid who helps someone else, who helps someone else.

So many of our kids who have been a part of our program have gone to college and then come back and served as mentors to other kids. It’s almost like a snowball effect.”

Each of the young adults who shared their story said they needed guidance and someone to take an interest in them, to believe in them.

They found that person in Tyrone Keys and his All Sports organization.

Each person we interviewed directly attributes his or her success to the efforts of Tyrone and his foundation. The students all agree that without his intervention in their lives and without the scholarships secured for them by the foundation, they could never have completed college and achieved the dreams no one else thought possible. They would never have been in a position to sit across the table from two writers and pull open their hearts to show the battle scars of a twisted childhood and the victory that is possible when someone cares.

We thought we would go to Tampa for a couple of days, visit a couple of schools that participate with Tyrone’s program. We planned to write down a few facts and make a quick trip to tour Raymond James Stadium. We could never have been more wrong. We sat spellbound for two 14-hour days listening as former All Sports mentees told their stories.

We didn’t want to leave them. We wanted to help—any way, anywhere. “Just let us be a part of this amazing organization,” we said.

“You can be,” Keys responded. “Write about the great things the students have done and are doing. Shed some light on them. They are the heroes.” We sat staring at this great man with a huge heart who takes no credit for himself. He gently moves about his life watching those around him, offering what he can to help, and surrounding them with love and a sense of peace. Y

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➺food for thought

“My food,” said Jesus, “is to do the will of Him that sent me, and to finish His work.” – John 4:34

by LYDIA BOLEN

BACK TO BUSY H

ow can it be the start of a new school year already?

Chaotic days of new schedules mean a transition back to the kitchen to prepare easy dishes for families on the go.

Any dish that you can assemble early in the day and cook later is a great start to getting a tasty meal together.

I like to try different shaped pasta for something fun. I especially like the shape of the wagon wheel pasta. This pasta can be turned into a

MAC AND CHEESE 2 cups (8 oz.) dry wagon wheel or rotelle pasta 1 cup frozen shelled edamame (shelled soybeans) (optional) 1 can (12 fl. oz.) evaporated milk 2 cups shredded Monterey Jack cheese or cheddar cheese blend 1/2 teaspoon garlic powder 1/2 teaspoon ground black pepper 1/2 cup cherry or grape tomatoes, cut in half (optional) Cook pasta according to package directions, adding edamame to boiling pasta water for the last two minutes of cooking time. Drain.

Combine evaporated milk, cheese, garlic powder and black pepper in medium saucepan. Cook over medium-low heat, stirring occasionally, until cheese is melted.

Remove from heat.

Add pasta and edamame to cheese sauce; stir until combined. Add tomatoes; stir gently until combined.

fabulous cheesy creation your children will love. Enjoy this Mac and Cheese dish alone or coupled with a main dish.

My children had special favorites they enjoyed while growing up. Two of them were Party Chicken and Meatloaf. Both are easy to prepare ahead of time, so a busy family will have a good comfort meal when they come in from the day. Simply add some sides like green beans, roasted potatoes, or a fresh green salad to complete the meal.

PARTY CHICKEN 5 or 6 1 1 2 1

chicken breasts - boneless, skinless package bacon jar dried beef cans cream of mushroom soup 16-ounce carton sour cream (can use light) White or brown rice (prepared according to directions)

Spray 9”x13” glass dish with cooking spray.

Arrange dried beef on the bottom of the dish.

Place chicken breasts between wax paper and pound to tenderize. Slice each breast in half lengthwise. Wrap each piece of chicken with a strip of uncooked bacon.

In separate bowl, mix together soup and sour cream. Arrange wrapped chicken on top of dried beef. Pour soup/sour cream mixture over all. Cover with foil and bake at 275 degrees for 3 to 3 1/2 hours. Take the foil off the last 20 minutes of cooking. Serve atop white or brown rice.

Can be easily doubled for more servings.

MEATLOAF 1 egg slightly beaten 1 1/2 pounds ground sirloin or any lean beef 1/2 cup plain bread crumbs 1 small onion, chopped (optional) 1 tablespoon horseradish 1 tablespoon ketchup 1 teaspoon salt 1 teaspoon sugar 1 cup milk, scalded Combine egg and meat. Add all other ingredients except milk. Add milk in last. Mix all together by hand. Line a 9”x13” glass dish with aluminum foil. Spray well with cooking spray. Place meat into prepared dish. Shape into a loaf. Use either ketchup or chili sauce to coat the top of the loaf. Place cut bacon pieces on top, if desired. Bake at 350 degrees for at least 1 hour. For well done, cook another 15 to 30 minutes. Y

Remember to make memories through the kitchen—”the heartbeat of the home.”

E-mail me at lbbolen@gmail.com for any questions.

34 SEPTEMBER 2012 ❘ Metro Christian Living

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➺let’s get real

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36 SEPTEMBER 2012 ❘ Metro Christian Living

Are You Being Fired?

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Webster’s Student Dictionary defines “functional” as, “…intended to be useful, rather than simply decorative” (such as pottery).

Are you familiar with McCarty pottery? If you live in Mississippi, I suspect you are. To me, all Mississippi pottery is beautiful but two unique features of McCarty provide an artful expression of God working “hands on” in our everyday lives. McCarty has that neat mud color and it reminds me that out of the dust of the earth, man was created. Also, worked into each piece is the Mississippi River, dark and crooked.

It may be found just inside the opening or on the side. But it’s there. It’s always there. When we see the river, we know the potter.

I want to share what I understood about the process involved in transforming a lump of clay into a finished piece. First, the potter must decide what his clay will become. A plate or bowl for the hungry…a pitcher for the thirsty… perhaps a vase to showcase God’s creation. With great passion and a vision, the potter sets his clay out on his wheel. He often tears the excess away, depending on the vessel’s size and purpose. As his steady hands envelop his work, his eyes remain locked onto the clay from start to finish, guiding every minute stage of its transformation. To reach every area, the potter must send the clay into a spin. As the clay turns, every area is exposed to the potter’s eye.

All the while, pressure and water are applied, softening and creating what was born in the potter’s mind and heart. And finally, there is the last minute chiseling, followed by some time in the fiery furnace!

In 1956, God set me out on His wheel. But time has passed and much has happened in my childhood and in my life. And I don’t mind telling you that I should be just a little more dysfunctional than I am. I would be especially dysfunctional if I had not begged God to keep His hand on my wheel. Nevertheless, I have spent years murmuring about The Process and worse yet—I have allowed others to hijack my wheel and try to shape my life. I’ve dwelled on the pressure and fussed about all of the clay that was taken from me. I have whined about the painful chiseling and the constant disturbing of my wheel and I have wrongly assumed that others have somehow tied God up and dropped Him off in some remote place, unable to get to me again. I was almost a self-declared useless

blob of clay with no value, unfit for the hungry or the thirsty.

But I’m fightin’ mad and I’ve decided I am not gonna take it any more! So I tell myself, “You go, girl!”

Recently, I have turned my face back toward the Lord, my Potter, and now I am really “fired up”! Why? Because I am His workmanship.

His and His alone. I am a sheep in His pasture, a branch on His vine, and a name in His Book of Life. And whatever He began in me, He will finish. He has never looked away or removed His hand from me and the constant pressure has contributed to my strength and His vision for my life. When things seemed to be spinning out of control, His water (His Spirit and His word) washed over me and revived my soul.

Are you just a little dysfunctional too?

Actually, the whole human race is dysfunctional but you know, we are all works in progress. If we are in Christ, we are not destined to be good-for-nothing cracked pots that have been severely damaged by mishandling. His banner over us is love.

If you are broken right now, my heart goes out to you. I hope my few words have brought you encouragement. I know that some of you feel like there is nothing left in your life to lose, because it has all been damaged or torn away.

But God has tracked each piece of you as it fell.

And He has saved all of your pieces. Somehow, He will take your old shattered and broken pieces, soften them and end up with brand new clay to form something really grand.

I have found that it is far better to endure the shaping process than to fight off the hands of God and flee His wheel in rebellion. Because when the heat is finally turned off, we will emerge from the fiery furnace strong and in one piece, and we, too will have a river running through us. Flow, river flow.

But now, O Lord, Thou art our Father, we are the clay, and Thou art our Potter; and all of us are the work of Thy hand. – Isaiah 64:8 Y Anne Buck is married to Brent, her husband of 29 years, and has two grown sons, Chris and David. Anne currently serves as Assistant to the Headmaster at Ben Lippen School, a ministry of Columbia International University in Columbia, SC. She loves to serve the Lord through writing and speaking. Contact her at wbbuck@sc.rr.com

➺

let’s talk it over

by ARIEL ANDERTON

Mirror, Mirror Your Kids

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hat a short summer! And now, the annual scramble back to school. No matter how much you did or

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didn’t prepare, there’s always that jolting adjustment back into the school routine. Even when I make a list so I won’t forget, it seems like something gets left off. Or every time I cross something off, a few more things take its place. Just trying to get it all done feels worthy of an Olympic medal!

Your kids are feeling it too. Even if they already know their classmates, there’s a new teacher with different expectations, a new building to find where all the bathrooms or best break spots are, or just having to get up and ready at that time of the morning they have not seen in a few months.

I bet it can seem like you’re pulling your kids along like added weight -- unless you’re one of the lucky ones with kids who cannot

What I mean by “mirror” is showing them you see what life is like and what it means to them. More than “I understand, but…” wait to get back in class! Letting your kids know about the list and what you need them to do to cooperate likely fills up the time in between dashes to this or that store. Wouldn’t it be nice to bypass the resistance from them, get on the same page, or even have some cooperation? I suggest using mirror moments as a tool in the midst of the bustle.

What I mean by “mirror” is showing them you see what life is like and what it means to them. More than “I understand, but…” or “I know what it’s like, but…” you reflect their current experience to the point where you get the nod of “yeah, that’s right” from them. This doesn’t have to be an emotional soliloquy or a touchy-feely novella, but it does describe the

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emotional piece. It may sound something like, “Having to go to Office Depot means school is any day now, and part of you just doesn’t won’t to go.” Pause. Let the mirror moment have its chance even though I know you want to add “but we have to do it now because…”

Wait for it. Did you get the nod? Or better yet, did they come back and correct you with what it’s actually like for them? Excellent!

Send back another comment with their correction included. Mirror moment success!

(Now, for getting them in the car towards Office Depot.) The more they see you get where they are, the more likely they are to feel understood and valued. Then working with you, the schedule, and the list, won’t be as big a deal.

Did you notice I was trying to mirror your experience in paragraphs one, two, and three?

This is something we all need—daily.

Incorporate these mirror, mirror moments as often as you can throughout the year, and your kids will know that you really know what it’s like to be them. This is a foundational element that will expand your relationship with them, through which other essentials like love, grace, and correction can enter. Y Ariel Anderton, MT, MA, LPC, LMFT is the children & adolescent therapist for Summit Counseling. She and her family have lived in the area six years.

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➺a pastor’s perspective

by LIGON DUNCAN

Trusting a Gracious God in a Time of Trauma hristians are often called to walk by faith, not by sight (2 Corinthians 5:7) in the trials, traumas and tragedies of life. But just how do you “trust in God with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding” (Proverbs 3:5) when your heart is breaking? How do you interpret hard circumstances (what the Puritans called “dark providences”) when troubling questions well up from within: “Why?” “Why Lord?” “Why this? Why now?” Or how do you begin to respond to the queries of the disillusioned, “How does a good God let something like that happen?”

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Thankfully, the Lord has not left us without direction and help in grappling with the heartaches of life. So much of what the Bible teaches is designed to help believers in precisely these kinds of situations.

This past Friday afternoon, I received word that the wife of a friend and colleague had been involved in a bicycle accident, receiving moderate to severe head injuries and a precarious prognosis (from full recovery to severe disabilities to death). As her son wrestled and reflected on this he said: “When the news hit me like a splash of cold water, my mind started running in all sorts of directions. I raced down every trail until the details and implications became too unbearable.

Then I would come back to reality for a brief couple of minutes, before another psychological workout began. As these emotions were swirling, and the blur of encouraging messages, phone calls, and visits continued throughout the day, there was the real sense of the Lord’s goodness despite the circumstances.”

What was it that helped this worried son gain some assurance of the Lord’s good purposes in spite of the situation? It was essentially his recalling and believing the truth that God had spoken to him in the Word, and then bringing that truth to bear on the traumatic circumstances he was facing.

In 1981, Sandy Ford, son of Leighton Ford (well-known Canadian 38 SEPTEMBER 2012 ❘ Metro Christian Living

evangelist and associate of Billy Graham) died in heart surgery.

Leighton said that experience completely changed his life. And as he sought to come to grips with the loss of his 21-year old firstborn son Leighton tells us “I was wrestling to bring my faith and my emotions together.” He knew what he believed. He trusted in the Bible, he trusted in the Word of God, but he had lost his oldest son. And what did he do? He brought God’s Word to bear on his experience.

Instead of saying, ‘This awful experience shows that God doesn’t care or isn’t good or isn’t in control,’ he moved from Scripture to experience. He saw his loss and heartbreak through the lens provided by a gracious and loving and sovereign God in Scripture. And he found peace.

Here’s the principle: we interpret our experience in light of Scripture. God’s word provides us with reading glasses through which we view the world and understand our experience. The Bible is God’s word to us, designed by him to reveal who he is and what he is like, and how we are to think about all of life and experience.

Jesus and his apostles emphasize this all the time in the New Testament. Think of Jesus’ words to the disciples in the Upper Room (on the night he was betrayed, the night before his crucifixion). The disciples were understandably upset. They could find no comfort in

their circumstance or situation. Every time Jesus mentioned to them his impending betrayal and death their hearts sank. Where could comfort be found? Not by looking at their circumstances, to be sure.

Indeed, things were going to get worse at and after the crucifixion. So what did Jesus tell them to do? “Let not your hearts be troubled.

Believe in God; believe also in me” (John 14:1).

But Jesus can give us peace, even in the midst of tribulation. And the source of that peace is the truth about Jesus—who he is and what he has done for us.

Jesus told them that their troubled hearts could find comfort by believing and trusting in God. So, their comfort would come from the truth he had taught them about himself and his Father, and from their trusting in the Father and him. In other words—their comfort came from truth about God and Christ, not from positive circumstances.

Indeed, their circumstances could hardly have been worse, but Jesus explained that by believing the truth and trusting God, they could find peace.

That is precisely what he tells them in John 16:33—”I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.” The world can’t give us lasting peace, because this world is filled with tribulation. But Jesus can give us peace, even in the midst of tribulation.

And the source of that peace is the truth about Jesus—who he is and what he has done for us. And that truth is revealed in the Word of God, the Bible. What did Jesus pray to our Father in Heaven later that night?

“Sanctify them in the truth; your word is truth” (John 17:17).

Friends, when trials come, look to the Word of God, and read your trial in light of the Bible, and “let not your hearts be troubled.” Y Ligon Duncan is the Senior Minister of the historic First Presbyterian Church, Jackson, Mississippi (1837), and the John E. Richards Professor of Systematic and Historical Theology at Reformed Theological Seminary. He is a native of Greenville, South Carolina, a graduate of Furman University (BA History), Covenant Theological Seminary, St. Louis, (MDiv; MA Historical Theology), and the University of Edinburgh, Scotland (PhD). His wife, Anne, is a teacher at Jackson Preparatory School, where she also serves as Director of Community Service.

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➺living my call

by ALI NORTH

PREPARING TO BE A MOM New Beginnings and Letting Go the Past ut one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 3:13-14).

If you are expecting a baby, congratulations! As a Certified Baby Planner and a Christian, I tell you this; the life inside of you is no mistake or work of science. “It” is a baby who was given breath by our Almighty God. “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made: your works are wonderful; I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be” (Psalm 139:13-16).

Pregnancy includes months of preparation for your baby, from taking childbirth classes to decorating the nursery. My job as a Certified Baby Planner is to assist expectant parents in all aspects of getting ready for their baby. However, as a Christian and a mother, I know that the most important place to start in your parenting journey is letting go of past guilt, heartaches, and fears that can keep you from fully enjoying the gift of life you are carrying.

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Letting Go of Guilt To fully enjoy the baby you are expecting, let go of past guilt that Satan is using to steal your joy. Many times we are being weighed down by guilt that we don’t realize still has a hold on us. Acknowledging sin and repenting is a principal of the Christian faith that we must follow.

However, rehashing past discretions that have been forgiven by God is

40 SEPTEMBER 2012 ❘ Metro Christian Living

not. That is a tool from the pit of Hell to keep you from drawing near to a loving Father.

Abortion In the United States, 22% of all pregnancies (excluding miscarriage) end in abortion. Those odds tell me that some readers will have had an abortion before this pregnancy. Although abortion is not honoring to God, He can forgive any sin and truly heal you from the inside out where you will not be held captive by shame any longer. Jesus died to cover every sin that you and I will ever commit. Pray to the Father with confession. “Then I acknowledged my sin to you and did not cover up my iniquity. I said, I will confess my transgressions to the Lord’ and you forgave the guilt of my sin” (Psalm 32:5).

If you have repented and are still struggling, seek help. There are wonderful ministries for post-abortion counseling. If you don’t feel comfortable meeting in person, there are even online options. I volunteer at Westside Pregnancy Clinic in Los Angeles and their Abortion Recovery Program offers online counseling (www.wpclinic.org) from anywhere in the country. It is my personal belief that every lost baby is with our Father and is taken care of in a more beautiful way than we can imagine.

Not Wanting This Baby According to the Alan Gutmacher Institute study of 2006, about one-half of American women experiences unintended pregnancy each year. If you fall into that category, you may have been surprised, (to say the least), by the positive pregnancy test.

First, let me say again, no life is an accident and no baby is a mistake. Of course there is free will in this fallen world, but it takes more than an egg and sperm to create life—it takes the Creator

Himself. In a perfect world, every baby would be welcomed into a house with a picket fence by married parents who have a huge savings account and the perfect relationship, right?

Well, perfection is an illusion for us humans, so that is never the case. Perhaps you are unmarried, out of work, in a rocky marriage, or feel you are just not ready to be a parent. While those are valid reasons to be concerned, Jesus promises us that He can overcome any tough situation.

“In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world” (John 16:33).

My advice is that you pray continually for the Lord to help you to connect with your baby in your womb. He wants us to be the parents He has called us to be, and I know He will honor that prayer. If you have been experiencing thoughts of wanting to lose your baby, confess them, let them go, and rebuke them if they return.

“We take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ” (2 Corinthians 10:5). Do the same with the guilt you feel for not wanting this baby. Don’t allow it to torment you and keep you from the joy of motherhood. God can make all things new.

Fear “For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you,‘Do not fear, I will help you” (Isaiah 41:13).

This verse brings me to tears. I have a tendency toward anxiety, and knowing that God is holding my hand and helping me is such a comfort.

From the moment your baby is conceived, you are a parent. As a friend told me when I was pregnant with my first child, “It is like a huge worry switch flips on!” It is totally normal to have concerns, fears, and doubts. However, God doesn’t want us to have them! For many mothers, though, the most worrisome part of pregnancy is the fear of losing the baby.

Miscarriage is a major concern for most expecting parents, especially in the first trimester, or for those who have previously lost a baby. Unfortunately, I know this fear and this pain well. When my daughter was 17 months old, I had finally weaned her from breastfeeding and was excited to start feeling like myself again—except that I didn’t. A pregnancy test confirmed that Baby number two was forming in my belly. I was shocked and fearful. My husband’s job had been cut to part-time and we couldn’t pay our bills as it was; how could we support two children? My daughter was already keeping me busy around the clock; how could I keep up with another? Didn’t I need a break from pregnancy and breastfeeding? My precious husband was thrilled by the news and reminded me of God’s promises and that we were favored by Him to be blessed with another child. I confessed my doubts and fears and decided right then to embrace and love my baby.

At eight weeks, however, our baby was gone and I was left with a

broken heart and a lot of questions for God. I still cry when I think of the loss and I still don’t understand why it had to happen. Just as His Word says, though, good was brought out of it in concrete ways. “And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God; who have been called according to His purpose” (Romans 8:28).

After the loss, I immediately wanted to get pregnant again, and I did. While I know it was God’s plan, (my infant son is sleeping next to me now), my motives were to replace the lost child. I can tell you that cannot be done. There are no “quick fixes” when it comes to the loss of life, and I had to grieve the baby I lost in order to fully love the new one created. I found it healing to name the baby who had died to make sure that she had her own special identity.

I also had to learn to trust God again and not fear another miscarriage. One of my dear friends gave me a bracelet during my pregnancy that says, “For God did not give us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind” (2 Timothy 1:7).

Though the threat of miscarriage is real, worrying incessantly about it will steal your joy. Almost half of all early miscarriages are because of chromosomal abnormalities that prevent the baby from growing. There is nothing that can be done to prevent the loss. It is inevitable. Lateterm miscarriages are usually due to structural abnormalities of the uterus, but only occur in about one percent of women. Infections, trauma, abnormal attachment of the placenta, uterine fibroids, cervical incompetence, and endocrine disturbances can cause late term loss, as well, but are extremely rare.

Ways to protect against miscarriage include avoiding drugs, tobacco, alcohol, high impact and contact activities, and undercooked or unpasteurized foods.

Above all, pray for protection for your little one and know that God loves that child even more than you do.

So during your pregnancy, “Cast your cares upon the Lord and He will sustain you” (Psalm 55:22). Be freed of your past burdens and prepare the glorious blessing of life, praising the Creator Himself and knowing that God’s plans are the best possible.

“I will exalt and praise your name, for in your faithfulness you have done wonderful things; things planned long ago” (Isaiah 25:1). Y

Ali (Kellogg) North is a native of Madison and was Miss Mississippi 2003 representing Madison County. She now resides in Los Angeles where she is a Certified Baby Planner and owner of Sweet Expectations. She and her husband, Will, are the proud parents of three-year-old Madison Faith and one-year-old Liam.

metrochristianliving.com ❘ SEPTEMBER 2012 41

➺christian commerce Circle Seven with Will Pace rowing up in the small town of Monticello, Mississippi, was more than a point of geography for me. It was the beginning of a sense of place that continues to influence my life four decades later. As one of

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seven children in a close family, I find that family and faith is still central to who I am today. My wife, Kate, and I married twelve years ago, and we have four wonderful children—two boys and two girls, ages 2, 5, 7 and 9. We have enjoyed making our home in Madison.

Small town life offered a different perspective that I value as much in 2012 as I did years ago in childhood. Life moved at a slower pace.

Neighbors knew one another in a way they do not expect to in larger cities. I grew up working at a hardware store where folks came in to visit as much as to buy their supplies, and I always appreciated the warm atmosphere that their store offered.

The Circle Seven Outpost & Provisions concept began in late 2007. I had watched the real estate growth in the Madison area over those makes us tick so to speak: the heartbeat behind a previous 10 years and decided it was time to make working entity of creative, capable people who always my own investment in commercial real estate. The give their best efforts. There’s a real story behind it. idea of a family-style, small business appealed to And like the small town living, we value the visits me. We were fortunate enough to have tenants with customers who become friends. We may sell one lined up for the other half of the building by the of the most exclusive brands in the world everyday, time we completed construction. but we will never lose sight of who we are or where As for why I decided on starting a retail Thomas, Virginia, Allen and Sonnie Pace. we come from. business, I had noticed that no one locally offered The main thing I realize daily is that I cannot do the classic outdoor and lifestyle lines that we now carry, such as Filson, it alone. We opened in 2009—a low-water mark for a business Barbour, Woolrich, and many others. I began contacting those brands, anywhere. Although we are growing every day, I understandably find and the feedback I received was very positive. We decided to move myself worrying and feeling responsible to make the business forward, and now we are selling products through our online store to successful. I do the best job I can each day. The truth is that the single consumers all over the country. most important thing I need to focus on daily is being faithful, We get calls daily from others out of town who do not use the obedient, and trusting in God’s provision, instead of exhausting my computer but prefer to do their business by phone and talk to a sinful, broken, and limited abilities to try to grow a business. knowledgeable person—old school-style. We have a comfortable The challenge always, whether in business or family, is to give our atmosphere at Circle Seven where people seem to feel at home. best efforts toward the ultimate goal. I also seek to be growing in spirit Many people have asked, why we chose the name Circle Seven. As as a loving husband and father. Now, the reality is I fail at it every day, one of seven children, the name Circle Seven was a perfect fit. I get but therein lies the beauty of God’s grace and mercy. There is a peace credit for dreaming up the store concept, but I must admit that I drew that comes within that you definitely won’t find in a spreadsheet or a from the talents of my brothers and sisters, and of course, my parents. I pie chart. Y have always respected their work ethic and how they’ve treated relationships with people all of their lives. Circle Seven represents what Circle Seven is located at 100 Mannsdale Park in Madison.

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money matters

by DANNY WILLIAMS

Measuring SUCCESS

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he past couple of months I have enjoyed watching several great sporting events. They all made me wish I was in Europe for the summer. During July, we

had the Tour de France cycling race. Also during July, we had the British Open Golf Championship, followed by the Olympic Games in London.

These are definitely some “world-class” sporting events, and even if you are not avid fans, it’s often interesting to hear some of the personal interest stories. We have heard about the characteristics of some of the winning participants. Some common ones are discipline, persistence, and personal commitment, just to name a few.

These characteristics remind me of a successful investment strategy.

There are a number of strategies that will help you win the race.

Even though Gabby Douglas, (Olympic gymnast), Ernie Els (professional golfer), and Bradley Wiggins (professional cyclist) may not always win their event, they have been extremely successful in their careers. Like each of these athletes, there are a number of proven training programs they have the choice of adopting; investment managers have a similar choice.

Trend following is one strategy that has worked well over a long period of time. Our firm has chosen this strategy because we believe that it is extremely important to be disciplined in the process. Let’s think about a disciplined approach for a minute. First, let me mention something that ties into this topic that I didn’t know. What is one of the fastest growing vocations in our country? My first thoughts were software, medical or telecommunications; none of these actually. I was surprised to learn that the answer is personal trainers. So my point is that there are a lot of people out there with their ideas on how to prepare an athlete to compete at the highest level. The same choices apply to how someone invests.

Many investors make changes periodically and never achieve their expected returns. They stay with one approach just long enough to get

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frustrated by not doing as well as the market or a strategy that their colleague is achieving. When an athlete picks a trainer or coach, they are making the choice based on what is right for them personally. They have to believe in how they are going to fit in with the approach and be willing to stay the course. There will be times when they may not win the top spot in their respective event, but they don’t keep jumping around from trainer to trainer if they believe in their process and it has been proven to achieve winning results.

We all want to grow the size of our accounts and be winners, and we have to believe in how we go about doing that. What is right for one is not necessarily going to be right for another. Some investors are not going to be able to live through what it takes to win under certain programs. For example, there may be too much volatility and the investor would not be willing to stay the course. The expectations need to be addressed and understood before hiring the trainer or the investment firm. When we look at a string of return numbers, they are often times presented on an annual basis. Guess what? This is not how we live them out in real life. We see information much more frequently and are tempted to make adjustments based on emotions. Of course, this is normal human nature to change courses when things don’t appear to be working as intended.

Discipline, persistence, and personal commitment are important characteristics of a world class athlete and a successful investment strategy. I encourage you to define your goals and expectations of what you want your investment strategy to accomplish and understand the sacrifices that will be part of the selected approach. You have the ability to set yourself apart from your competition when the right decision, for you, is made. Y Danny Williams, CFP®, is a partner with Woodridge Capital, a registered investment advisory company located at 800 Woodlands Parkway, Suite 201, Ridgeland, MS. For more information, call 601-957-6006 or danny.williams@woodridge-capital.com.

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➺homeworks

by CATHY HAYNIE

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Stress dedicates itself to the study of stress and stress management. What I really took away from a quick perusal of their website was that the way to ultimately deal with stress is to prevent it. I generally agree with this premise and encourage it in deeper thought as you contemplate what stresses you. While we can’t always prevent stressful circumstances, we can prepare for them. Here is a brief and light list of helps for stressed and overloaded lives.

1. Jesus calls the weary. The first place relief comes to us from Jesus himself. Come to me all you who are weary, and I will give you rest. – Matthew 11:28. Scripture must be our landing place when we feel overwhelmed or burdened. Our life’s circumstances are never overwhelming to our Heavenly Father!

2. Sunday is your built-in coping mechanism. By setting Sunday apart from the rest of the week, you have a day that is different—to enjoy, to worship, to rest.

3.Take pleasure in small things. We often move through life so fast that we don’t enjoy the beauty of a sunset, relaxing music, the scent of a candle, flowers in a vase, or the feel of a comfortable chair and blanket. When life is pulling you in a million directions, take pleasure in the little things.

4.Take a walk. I’m repeating what I’ve heard a thousand times before when I say that exercise relieves stress. I’m not sure that it is just the exercise itself, but maybe the chance to clear the mind and enjoy being outside. It’s also easy to let go of healthier eating habits amidst overload, so keep your awareness up.

5. Stop trying to do it all. We often think we can tighten our scheduling and organizational belt and then we can manage it all. Sometimes, we need to stop trying to do so much and learn that the word “no” is a great stress reliever! What can you let go of? While organization and scheduling IS helpful, overcrowded schedules and over-committed lives can’t really lead to better organization and timemanagement. Instead, they most often lead to stress and overload.

6. Leave early. This quick fix really does relieve stress. Leaving just five minutes early for work, school, or an appointment takes some of the hurry-up out of your day.

7. Name that attitude. Stress does affect our mood and reaction to others. Stress can leave us distant or short-tempered, and it is important to recognize these in our countenance. Smiles, expressions of gratitude, kind gestures, and gentle answers actually calm us, along with those around us. A willful attention to our mood is important when we are feeling overwhelmed. In so doing, we can fight the time wasters of fear, anxiety, paranoia, and overanalyzing, which can all be overly present amidst stress.

8. Right up there with exercise is fun. As you look over the landscape of your week, be sure there are some down times that bring pleasure and relaxation. Whether it’s hobbies or reading or enjoying time with others, make time for these things. All work and no play does more than make Jack a dull boy, it contributes to his stress!

It is important to find our own balance and ways of taking a deep breath, so to speak, during busy seasons. However, when we are engulfed in overload, we don’t necessarily recognize our options for relief. The time to build in healthy habits is before you’ve had enough. So go ahead, light a candle on your counter, turn on some nice music, and enjoy the life you’ve been blessed to live. Y Cathy Haynie and her husband, Jack, have three teenagers and make their home in Madison. Cathy is the Headmaster of Christ Covenant School and occasionally speaks to groups on Honoring God in the Home and Balancing Work and Home. Contact her at chaynie@ccs.ms

legal advice VERY IMPORTANT: Care of the Caregiver

by WILLIAM B. HOWELL

M

uch has been written through the years about how to care for a person suffering from Alzheimer’s or other forms of dementia, from Parkinson’s disease, or from a disabling stroke.

There is a large volume of information available to assist in these endeavors.

However, what all too frequently is overlooked is the care for the person who is giving the care to the victim of disability: that is, the care of the caregiver.

Almost all of us have known someone who has been a caregiver and who passed away prior to the person for whom they were caring. There are those situations in which a caregiver, while providing care for a loved one, had a stroke or became otherwise incapacitated, themself. What happens under those circumstances?

If the caregiver becomes incapacitated, not only does the family have two people to take care of, they may also not have the proper tools in place to allow them to exercise that caregiving. Specifically, they need an Advance Health-Care Directive for the caregiver, with the HIPAA authorization as a part, in order to allow the medical care to be tended to in an informed manner. There also needs to be, at a minimum, a very well written and quite thorough Durable Power of Attorney, which includes gifting authority.

Even better in many instances is to have a Living Trust, which will allow a chosen person to take care of the caregiver in the event that the caregiver becomes incapacitated, or in the event they pass away. A properly drafted and funded Living Trust will allow the family to avoid having to rely on a power of attorney (which is often not honored), having to go to court for a conservatorship at disability, or having to go through probate at the death of the caregiver.

That second eventuality, that is, the death of the caregiver, also can be

quite problematic. In many instances, the person for whom care is being rendered may be in a nursing home and may be receiving benefits from Medicaid. If that should be the case and the spouse caregiver passes away, the Medicaid recipient may be the beneficiary of the assets owned by the deceased caregiver spouse, resulting in a sudden disqualification for Medicaid benefits which have been paying for nursing home care. This type disaster can be readily avoided with a proper Will or other structure for the caregiver spouse, written in such a way that if the caregiver spouse does pass away then the spouse in the nursing home will not be disqualified for Medicaid benefits. Of course, this type Will must be written with considerable care by an attorney who is familiar with Medicaid planning and the prevention of disqualification.

In short, the care of the caregiver can have as much to do with the providing of attention to the needs of the incapacitated person who is being cared for as it does direct planning for the incapacitated person himself. It is part of an overall plan for the estate and for the long-term care arrangements that should always be in place for any husband and wife where one of the two is in need of assistance and continuing care. It may not be needed today, but what about tomorrow? Preparing for those “what ifs” is what good planning is all about. While it is not possible to anticipate and prepare for every eventuality, those that are not remote in possibility, or that are likely to happen given a person’s health and history, are well worth planning for. It will make you and your family that much more secure, and make taking care of the caregiver that much easier.

Get some advice, do it right, and you can minimize the worry for the entire family. Y

You have worked hard for it.

WHY THROW IT AWAY? We are all living longer. But we are not all going to be in good health, or aware of our families, or both. Then what happens? Someone has to take over. The question is: Will this be someone you chose? And will it be outside of court or in court? The same with the distribution of your assets after you pass away: In court or out of court? The choice is yours. What about protecting your assets from lawsuits, or a child’s inheritance from a divorce? And will most of your hard-earned savings go to the nursing home? Or have you planned? Here are a few ideas for you to consider:

Living Trust – Allows the person you choose to take over for you in the event of your incapacity, without any court involvement. At your death the person you have chosen makes the distribution of your assets the way you have instructed in your Living Trust, and to do so promptly, inexpensively and privately, without going through probate in the court.

Asset Protection – Lawsuits are filed every day. If you get sued, are your assets protected? They can be, and probably should be. Also, the divorce rate has never been higher than it is today. Will your child’s divorce cause them to lose half of what you leave them after you are gone? Not if you plan now. The level of protection (or not) is up to you.

Nursing Home Planning – Don’t qualify for long term care insurance, or can’t fit it in your budget? You don’t have to spend everything that you have in order to become eligible for nursing home benefits. There are legal and ethical ways for you to save well over half of your assets in most cases, even if you are already in the nursing home.

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National Academy of Elder Law Attorneys metrochristianliving.com ❘ SEPTEMBER 2012 47

➺all in the family

by DR. JOHN L. COX

Six Back-to-School Pointers for Back-to-School Parents do a bit of parenting consultation as a psychologist. I counsel kids with behavior problems, ADD, emotional struggles, etc. And, also parents with behavior problems, ADD, emotional struggles, etc. Here are just a few things I find myself reminding parents about during back-to-school time.

I

1

Not everything is going on their resume!

Let’s start by putting school in context. How many parents do I talk to who are scaring the daylights out of their ninth grader who is making a “C” in English? “Don’t you know that the stuff you’re doing now is going on your record for college!” And then the parents wonder why their kid develops an anxiety disorder by their junior year. Chill. Your kid NOT being neurotic is more important than them getting into Vanderbilt. Trust me on this one.

2

Help your kids with homework...

But it’s THEIR homework.

One of my least favorite comments from parents is, “We’ve got a lot of homework to do tonight.” I want to say to the

48 SEPTEMBER 2012 ❘ Metro Christian Living

parent, “What? Are they making you re-do the fifth grade after all these years?” It is okay to help your kids with their homework, but remember—it’s their homework, and you are just nice enough to help.

3

Don’t be afraid of some failure.

How many times have I told parents that the only way to let their child learn to take responsibility for their own schoolwork is to back off, and let their child take responsibility for their own schoolwork? (My job is not rocket science). But what do these parents usually say to my sage wisdom? “If we do that, he’ll just blow off his work and FAIL!” To which I usually reply, “And is that BAD?” Secret of the Universe: The only way that anyone learns anything is by doing it poorly at first. The relatively

small failures kids experience during childhood are good—and are much better than the big failures later. Don’t be afraid of your child’s failures.

4

Let their activities be THEIR activities.

5

Be nice but not weak.

I remember seeing a cartoon of a bunch of parents cheering at a high school football game. The cheer went like this, “We pin all our hopes and dreams, on our children’s high school teams.” I hate to sound like John Rosemond, but “when WE were growing up,” kids just played. We wanted to win and we hated to lose, but now it’s all organized, strategized and “parentized.” Today’s parents are so committed to their children’s success that they get extra coaching, spend summers at pro camps, and make special cookies for the team before each game. I like to remind parents to ask themselves, “WHO are you doing this for?”

6

Don’t freak out more than they do.

Nothing is worse than seeing our children suffer. As we all know, school offers countless reasons for suffering: your child doesn’t make the team (football, cheerleader, lead in the play, etc.); your child doesn’t get asked out (to birthday party, prom, sorority); you get the idea. Well, despite the fact that all of us parents are tormented by our children’s struggles, it is vitally important that (as least as far as our children are aware) we never react more dramatically to their suffering than the child does! How many kids have I seen who didn’t make cheerleader and are of course sad, but their mom is throwing a complete chicken fit: calling the cheerleader sponsor; transferring schools; reminding the child that now they will NEVER get in a sorority! This is not helpful to your child. We need to be able to manage our feelings about the children’s losses better than our children do. One of the reasons many kids don’t share things with their parents is because they know that if they do, they will have two problems instead of one. Not getting cheerleader AND a freaked out mom! Why tell her?

You might notice a theme in many of these reminders: We parents tend to get too “up in our children’s business.” Childhood is preparation for adulthood. The goal is for your child to live their life, with your help. School is their first independent universe. My advice is to help them keep it that way! Y Dr John L. Cox is a clinical psychologist in practice here in Jackson. He works with adults, marriages and children. You can contact him at 601-352-7398. Visit the webpage for Dr. Cox’s upcoming book at www.thebigpictureparent.com

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As the great Patrick Swayze said in the landmark film Roadhouse, “Be nice. Until it’s time to not be nice.” But the point is made. If you are the parent, you can be nice during discipline because you have all the power. And the only reason we yell at them is because something in us doesn’t believe that. For example, if your teen sasses you, leaves the house and drives off, be nice. You have all the power. Just wait until they come back (they always do, they have no power, nor a house and you do) and quietly take their keys. When they can’t find their keys, you can explain (since you have all the power) that they won’t get their keys back for a while because they stormed out last night and left. They will then argue and tantrum. You do not need to participate. Let them be unhappy and think you are unfair. You don’t need them to like you. You have all the power, remember? Only frightened parents yell.

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a view from you Comments this month from our website

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AUGUST 2012

this edition together. Loved reading about Lynn Fitch. You have assembled a terrific team.

– Gayle Henry

R Best Recipes for Summer’s End

Get Savvy on Taxes Technology Used Wisely

First, I’d like to say I LOVE your magazine and LOVE reading it cover to cover when I get it. It’s ALWAYS encouraging and I always am just so inspired when I read it.

– Amanda Wootton

R I thoroughly enjoyed Dr. Nancy New Boyll’s article on technology this month.

She is an inspiration in her service to young people all over the state. We should be proud to have individuals of Nancy’s caliber serving our educational system in the endeavors she undertakes. Thanks!

With the changing environment of business, our faith can be a constant. Metro Christian Living appeals to that mind set and our first month of advertising produced a surprising number of calls. Senior Transitions supports Metro Christian Living as one of our advertising partners.

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R Advertising in Metro Christian Living has been one of the best decisions I’ve made for my new business. I have been very pleased with the number of calls that come straight from the readers of your magazine! As a new business, it is so important to be sure of where your advertising dollars are going . . . it is clear that we made the right choice. Thank you Marilyn & team for consistently producing a fantastic publication, month after month!!

– Mike Davis, Owner, Covenant Caregivers

R Thank you very much for the opportunity to speak with you today. Again, you have a beautiful magazine, beautiful layout, and very warm, encouraging and empowering articles.

– Joseph Parker, American Family Radio

R I was so excited to get to get the MCL. Of course, I read your article first, but could not wait to read Betsy’s. You did a great job putting

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“As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.”

– Joshua 24:15

Thank you SO MUCH for bringing the positive, interesting and inspiring stories through your magazine for these past 10 years (and counting!)

– Lyn Isonhood

R I wanted to introduce you to our organization. I am sure many people reach out to you and offer their stories….this came up yesterday as I was talking with the chairperson of our upcoming event. He asked me if I thought we should get____or____or____to come out to our event. Without hesitation, I said that if I could invite anyone to “know” us better, it would be Metro Christian. Through work I have done in the past, I have come to know each of those folks quite well. But it is Metro Christian that I believe needs to hear about us...I understand that you are by no means obliged to “know” us better...but God is honored when we pray for big things. I look forward to hearing from you.

– Ian MacDonald, Managing Director Restoration Hope

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➺rave reviews BOOK

Unglued Reviewed by Susan E. Richardson

Most of us are uncomfortably familiar with unglued moments: times when raw emotions spill out onto those around us with little provocation, leaving shame and regret in their wake. Some of us may be exploders while others are stuffers. Either group comes unglued when stress hits. In Unglued, Lysa TerKeurst offers direction for overcoming these outbursts.

The path requires allowing God to renew our minds through Scripture and rejecting past labels in our current lives.

Fortunately, the author asks the reader to accept imperfect progress rather than demanding perfection. Like a sculptor chiseling stone, God’s work in us takes time.

Understanding how we may come unglued helps us work through the process. TerKeurst offers four categories: “exploders who shame themselves, exploders who blame others, stuffers who build barriers, and stuffers who collect retaliation rocks.”

Changing the patterns mean changing our focus and identifying the evil desires that underlie our reactions. Keeping our focus on Jesus is key. Being willing to turn away from evil desires robs unglued reactions of their fuel.

These reactions do have a positive side. By paying attention to what triggers a response, we can get at deeper issues we need to bring before God. The goal is to become more like Jesus.

A website offers more resources for those who want to use the book as a study guide. Anyone who has ever had an unglued reaction will find something here to help with the process of developing self-discipline and a Godly character. Y Susan E. Richardson is a writer, critique reader, and former Christian retailer with a passion for meeting people’s needs through the written word. You can reach her through her website www.nextlevelcritiques.com.

52 SEPTEMBER 2012 ❘ Metro Christian Living

MUSIC The New International Commentary on the New Testament

The Epistle to the Hebrews Reviewed by Stuart Kellogg

Gary Cockerill for years has challenged students at Wesley Biblical Seminary in North Jackson so they will be prepared for the pulpit and mission field. He’s now challenging Christians around to world to understand one of the most critical books in the New Testament. Cockerill, the Research Professor of New Testament and Biblical Theology at WBS, just wrote The Epistle to the Hebrews, the latest commentary for the New International Commentary on the New Testament. It’s a break through publication aimed at helping Christians better understand a difficult book.

This commentary replaces the seminal work from the world renowned, late Biblical scholar F.F. Bruce. Cockerill met Dr. Bruce 40 years ago and says he never dreamed he would produce a replacement commentary. Why is a new one needed? “It’s a new analysis and is arranged and crafted to have the biggest impact on readers,” Dr. Cockerill explains. “Readers will see how every passage of Hebrews fits the overall purpose of the book.”

Since writing his doctoral thesis on Hebrews and graduating with his Ph.D. Dr. Cockerill has done much more than teach. In fact, this ordained minister in the Wesleyan Church spent nine years as a missionary to Sierra Leon, in war torn West Africa. He and his wife Rosa have three grown children. The couple touches much of the Metro, living in Clinton, worshiping at Olde Town Community Church (Church of God, Anderson IN) in Ridgeland and working in Jackson. The Epistle to the Hebrews is published by Wm. B. Eerdmans Publishing. Y

Tom Edwards and His Band of Joshes Reviewed by Casey Combest

After 15 years of playing music on the road, Tom Edwards & his band of Joshes have not slowed down. In fact, they have picked up the pace making this year their “most fun year yet”, they collectively feel.

With three recording projects under their belts they have, since the New Year, produced a worship cover EP, an acoustic hymns album and are in the writing stage of their fourth full-length project. “Our hearts are very much driven by leading people in worship & we want to do that by making good art, by being good artists”, says Tom. The line up for the Tom Edwards Band is Tom Edwards, of course, Josh Rosonet, Josh Williams & Josh Myers.

“We want to keep the audiences engaged by using more familiar worship songs, but God is dealing with us as well and as songwriters, I feel we have a lot to bring to the table”, says drummer Josh Myers.

“If a song leads me somewhere I know that I can honestly lead others through that song,” admits Tom, “Getting people to engage in worship with me is almost a matter of survival.”

Tom and the Joshes believe that worship is not about observation, but participation.

Heart, talent, honesty, artistry & a passion for the Church—to get an idea of what all this looks like combined, check them out at tomedwardsband.com or purchase their music on iTunes.com. Y

events calendar September 14-15 Let your creative side show at this year’s Arts on the Square.

Enjoy a weekend filled with music, pottery, jewelry and much more. For more information visit www.canton-mississippi.com.

on 627 E. Silas Brown from 6:30 p.m. – 9:00 p.m. Enjoy delicious food provided by Fresh Cut Catering while supporting a great cause.

Tickets are $50 with proceeds going to support The Center’s ministry for the victims of domestic violence. Call 601-932-4198 for tickets and information.

September 25

MADISON September 20 The Women’s Ministry of First Baptist Church Madison is hosting Friends, Faith and Chocolate with special guest Kelly McCorkle Parkison, a former competitor on CBS’s The Amazing Race, where she and her partner finished in third place. The festivities begin at 6:30 p.m. in the Worship Center with tickets being $5.00. Email any questions or comments to rcourtney53@comcast.net.

The annual Bottom Line for Kids Benefit Dinner and Auction, a program operated by the Southern Christian Services for Children and Youth, will be held at the Country Club of Jackson. Festivities begin at 6:00 p.m. and will feature entertainment, a silent and live auction, and dinner. For ticket information call 601-354-0983.

September 29

The Mississippi Community Center, a nonprofit organization dedicated to the improvement of communities throughout Mississippi, is having their 4th Annual Golf Tournament. Lake Caroline Golf Course in Madison will play host with all proceeds going towards the Children’s Advocacy Center of Madison and Rankin Counties. For additional information visit www.mscec.org.

The 29th WellsFest will be held at Jamie Fowler 2012 Boyll Park on Lakeland Drive with proceeds going to help the Farish Street YMCA improve the children’s playground.

The festivities kick off at 8:00 a.m. with a 5-K run and walk followed by at pet parade beginning at 9:00 a.m. Music takes center stage at 10:00 a.m. and is sure to provide great family entertainment. Admission is free and for additional information call 601-353-0658.

JACKSON

HATTIESBURG

September 7-9

September 4

CelticFest Mississippi is celebrating its 21st anniversary at the Mississippi Agricultural and Forestry Museum with foot stomping music, dance workshops, a children’s area plus a Highland Games demonstration on Saturday. Enjoy the best of Celtic culture in this fun filled family event. For more information visit www.CelticFestMS.org.

Ali Kellogg North will be visiting Forrest General Hospital from 5:00-8:30 p.m. for “Sweet Expectations: Planning for a Baby” seminar. Expectant parents are invited to join to get helpful tips on choosing items for the baby registry, basic baby proofing, finding future childcare and much more. This event is free but registration is required by calling 601-288-4968.

September 28

CRYSTAL SPRINGS September 29

September 20 The Center for Violence Prevention’s Masquerade Party will be held at The South

Rock the Park! 2012 featuring Big Daddy Weave, Ashes Remain, Aaron Shust and more will be held at Chautauqua Park with gates opening at 4:30 p.m. and music beginning at 5:30 p.m. Come be a part of this fun filled family event as we say goodbye to summer.

For additional information go to www.rocktheparkcrystalsprings.com Y

WHAT’S GOING ON

Center for Violence Prevention Domestic violence, defined as emotionally and/or physically controlling an intimate partner, has a way of affecting individuals from all walks of life regardless of race, socioeconomic status, or geographic location. The metro area is home to “The Center,” a Client Assistance Program that provides help and services to women, children, and families of domestic violence.

Supportive services such as emergency housing, food, medical help, therapy, and transportation are provided at The Center, as well as non emergency shelter which supports offsite aid in victim recovery.

While the Jackson Metro area currently makes up a large percentage of The Center’s victims, in 2011 The Client Assistance Program spread to the more rural area where social services were lacking and residential location made assistance a challenge.

With the combined forces of local law enforcement agencies, churches, and hospitals, The Center has been successful in reaching this sometimes forgotten population.

The Center has an outstanding record of service helping both the victims of domestic violence and a Batterer’s Intervention Program which assist in breaking the cycle of violence with the offenders. The Center’s commitment to providing need to the broken is their number one priority and ministry.

One of The Center’s annual fundraisers will be held Thursday, September 20 at The South on E. Silas Brown. The Masquerade Party will begin at 6:30 with sponsorship opportunities available. Monies raised go to train staff, provide emergency housing, medical assistance, therapy and much more. Tickets to the event are $50. For additional information call 601-932-4198.

metrochristianliving.com ❘ SEPTEMBER 2012 53

SEPTEMBER 2012

CANTON

➺quips & quotes

ADVERTISING INDEX ADVERTISER

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54 SEPTEMBER 2012 ❘ Metro Christian Living

“The Holy Scriptures are our letters from home.”

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“For he will give his angels charge of you to guard you in all your ways.”

- Psalm 91:11

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metrochristianliving.com â?&#x2DC; SEPTEMBER 2012 55

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