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contents OCTOBER 2021 VOLUME 16, NUMBER 4 PUBLISHER
MS Christian Living, Inc. EDITOR
Katie Eubanks katie@mschristianliving.com MANAGING EDITOR
Suzanne Durfey ART/GRAPHIC DESIGN
Jill and David Dale share about their journey through cancer with their son, Campbell, pictured above with his twin sister, Avery. See page 18
columns 8 As I See It How to navigate tragedy with grace From left, Southside Baptist Church staff members Willie Cox, Bell Russell and Jeff Parker say the south Jackson church offers a glimpse of heaven. See page 24.
10 Modern Motherhood Why reliance is better than confidence
12 Health & Wellness Tips for talking with your child about mental health
14 Mission Mississippi Moments Why we need to submit to each other
Sandra Goff SALES
Suzanne Durfey, Ginger Gober, Dorothy Bachus CONTRIBUTING WRITERS
CC Allgood, Barbara Beavers, Mandy Bufkin, Libbo Crosswhite, Dan Hall, Dr. Fred Hall, Laura Lee Leathers, Anna Claire O’Cain, Ginny Owens, Chanda Roby, Molly Staley COVER PHOTOGRAPHY
Stegall Imagery DISTRIBUTION ASSISTANTS
Michelle and Randy Fortenberry, Rachel and Nettie Schulte, Jerri and Sammy Strickland, Rachel and Bob Whatley
16 This Is My Story How I learned to sing in the dark
27 Food for Thought Friends and family faves for fall
28 Lagniappe How a Life Plan Community can offer crucial socialization for seniors
29 The Doctor Is In A recent worship service at Southside Baptist.
Say goodbye to joint pain and live your best life
30 A Cup of Encouragement Why you should keep a hymnal near your Bible
cover story
31 Tough Questions
18 Jill and David Dale
How do I deal with losing loved ones to COVID?
Honoring their ‘Bulldog’
33 Rave Reviews ‘Wounded Sheep: How to Calm a Storm’
feature 24 Southside Baptist Church A glimpse of heaven
33 What’s Going On A new hope for REAL change
in every issue Coming next month Charlotte Waller on faith, family, tea parties, and (staying out of) politics
6 Editor’s Letter 34 Quips & Quotes 34 Advertiser Index
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601.790.9076 mschristianliving.com Mississippi Christian Living is committed to encouraging individuals in their daily lives by presenting the faith stories of others and by providing information that will point every person, at every stage of life, to a deeper, authentic, personal, and life-changing encounter with Jesus Christ. Views expressed in Mississippi Christian Living do not necessarily represent those of the publisher. Every effort has been made by the Mississippi Christian Living staff to insure accuracy of the publication contents. However, we do not guarantee the accuracy of all information nor the absence of errors and omissions; hence, no responsibility can be or is assumed. All Rights Reserved. Copyright 2021 by MS Christian Living, Inc. Mississippi Christian Living is published monthly and is available for free at hightraffic locations throughout the tri-county area. Subscriptions are $29 a year. POSTMASTER: Send change of address to Mississippi Christian Living, P.O. Box 1819, Madison, MS 39130.
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EDITOR’S LETTER
Splinters, sore throats, and hearing from God
S
ometimes the answer to our problem is obvious, but we haven’t paid attention.
CARLI ANN PHOTOGRAPHY
Sometimes we’re so busy worrying, we fail to ask God what to do. I’m preaching to myself here. Over the last month, my cat has died; my dryer has stopped working; there’s been COVID vaccine drama in our government and on social media; I’ve come down with a raw, sore throat (it’s not COVID!); MCL’s regular printer couldn’t print this edition at our regular size, so I had to find another printer; our December photo shoot, which will include five people on the cover, had to be scheduled with less than a week’s notice; I’ve got a women’s retreat to promote and execute (more on that in a minute); and a splinter* has worked its way into the ball of my foot. *An alleged splinter, which I felt but never saw, and which has since left the scene — no thanks to a hilarious home remedy involving taping a piece of ripe banana peel to the affected area. None of these challenges is life-threatening, to my knowledge, except in the literal sense of my cat. I’m about to get a free dryer from my brother, who’s upgrading; I can’t do anything to stop the vaccine fights, so I might as well stop worrying about them; I found another printer for this edition and wrangled five people plus a photographer for the December cover; my throat is slowly improving; and the women’s retreat is truly exciting. So I’m not exactly Job here. In fact, the more times I tell someone, “It seems like it’s been one thing after another,” the more times I hear, “Sometimes life is like that…” In other words, “Welcome to the club, Katie. I’m sorry you got a splinter and had to do your job.” But still, it’s easy to get sucked into worry and frustration, even when my problems don’t amount to a molehill, much less a mountain. I pray about challenges, absolutely, but I always take a while before surrendering them to God and stopping long enough to listen for His answer. This morning, I managed to get up before my alarm (thank you, sore throat!), mostly ignore social media, and read a bit of scripture. I’ve been slowly making my way through Isaiah, my favorite book of the Bible. (And let me just say, if you want to hear from God, read
6 OCTOBER 2021 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
what He has to say to ancient Israel. It’s eerily applicable.) At the end of Isaiah 52, it says that “kings” will “shut their mouths” when they see the returning Messiah; that they will see and consider what they had not known before. Boy, sometimes I need to shut my mouth and look at Jesus. Every time I prioritize the Lord, I remember why I need to. I remember why group chats and social media and (fill in the blank) are fine, but He is supreme. When I stop talking and seek to hear Him, I wind up seeing and considering something I hadn’t thought about before. Suddenly, life’s challenges are surmountable. My “issues” are nothing compared with the glory of Almighty God, who goes before me and behind me. This is why the theme of MCL’s 2021 Fear to Faith Women’s Retreat is “Hearing from God.” We can’t proclaim God’s goodness, share His love, or even get through our workday if we don’t first hear from Him. We are far too quick to speak in His name before listening to what He has to say. The women’s retreat is happening Saturday, October 30, at Broadmoor Baptist Church in Madison, from 9 a.m. to 3 p.m. Ginny Owens, an award-winning singer-songwriter from Jackson, is our keynote speaker and worship leader. The retreat will also feature other speakers and panelists, and we’ll be serving lunch. I am really, really excited to get some women together to hear from the Lord and to talk about what that means. You can find tickets and more information at bit.ly/mclretreat21, or visit our Facebook page at Facebook.com/MSChristianLiving and view the post pinned to the top of the page. If you have a group of 10 or more who want tickets, email me for a discount code! In the meantime, I hope the words in this edition of MCL point you to the One who goes before and behind you, whose name is Wonderful Counselor and Mighty God. Seek to hear from Him, and He will guide you at every turn. Y
Katie Eubanks katie@mschristianliving.com
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AS I SEE IT
by DAN HALL
How to navigate tragedy with grace Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God. – 2 Corinthians 1:3-4
I
always feel honored to be asked to contribute to Mississippi Christian Living magazine. Sometimes I am
assigned the topic, and other times I write what’s on my heart and mind. This month was a little tricky: Its focus includes both racial reconciliation and cancer awareness. So I noodled around with both of those and considered their commonalities. One thing they both share is tragedy. The fact remains that our nation, wherever you think we are today, has been deeply marked by racism. Concurrently, cancer has painfully impacted many lives of those reading this. We have made great strides in race relations but with more remaining. Many have survived cancer and indeed are flourishing. Others have succumbed to its vicious reality. I lost my sister to ovarian cancer 17 years ago, leaving four children and never enjoying her future grandchildren. I have friends of color who tell me they still experience measures of racism. And I found myself in a wheelchair after 52 years of normalcy. When I came to consciousness in the ICU, I immediately thought, “Now what?” Most of us have had to navigate tragedy in our lives: a painful divorce, a lost job, a deep betrayal. Moments in time, specific events, and seasons can mark us for the remainder of our lives.
“
One of the most significant ways I’ve discovered to ‘take back my life’ is to, in fact, lay it down for others. Those days I want to wallow in my pain and the ‘what ifs’ and ‘back befores,’ one of the greatest antibiotics to my heart and mind is to offer comfort and empathy to those similarly impacted.
”
So how do we deal with these experiences? Let me share from Paul’s second letter to the Corinthians the path I’ve chosen:
◼ God meets us in our pain with grace. He is not taken by surprise but already has a healing salve for the wound. Growing up, I was quite active. Regardless of what my boo-boo was, Mom had medicine in the cabinet for it. No matter what we go through, we can have confidence that God has a way to meet us.
◼ Other people have faced the same pain we have. One of the greatest deceptions is to convince us that “no one understands.” No doubt, in the middle of pain, one can feel very alone. In due
time, God often brings us to those with a shared vocabulary around our common wound.
◼ We have the opportunity to be conduits of God’s grace. Paul told the Corinthians to take the comfort they were given during difficulty and offer it to others. A community of folk has experienced the same pain we have, a collection of individuals who have navigated their darkness and tragedy. We have the opportunity to help. One of the most significant ways I’ve discovered to “take back my life” is to, in fact, lay it down for others. Those days I want to wallow in my pain and the “what ifs” and “back befores,” one of the greatest antibiotics to my heart and mind is to offer comfort and empathy to those similarly impacted. Maybe we all could develop a prayer something like this: “Help me, Father, to be a conduit of Your grace as You turn our tragedy to treasure, our pain to purpose, our wounds to wisdom.” Y
Dan Hall is an executive and strategic coach to leaders and executive teams. He also works with organizations on team building, conflict resolution and communication skills. He and his wife, Hazel, have six children and four grandchildren. You can reach him at Dan@OnCourseSolutions.com.
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Ginny Owens Keynote Speaker and Worship Leader mschristianliving.com ❘ OCTOBER 2021 9
MODERN MOTHERHOOD
by LIBBO CROSSWHITE
Why reliance is better than confidence
I
have a short window left to talk candidly about my youngest. He’s
learning to read a lot faster than I anticipated. Russell is evolving into his personality, and it’s interesting to watch, because he is our goofy, fun-loving one who keeps all of us laughing. That is, until any girl comes within 6 feet of him — young, old, dear friend or complete stranger, Russell avoids eye contact, words, or anything close to human communication. In my incessant worry as his mother (honestly, I already feel bad for his wife, I will be such a difficult mother-in-law), I asked him a question one day. It happened when we got into the car after an awkward encounter with one of his female classmates: “Russ, what are you going to do in high school when a girl talks to you? I really don’t think you are going to just be able to avoid girls your whole life.” And he said, as calmly and confidently as he tells me he loves me each night, “Well Mom, I’ll either walk away or I will ask her to marry me. It’s not that hard.” Lord, help me. For real. It’s conversations like this (and my 8-year-old daughter’s sole birthday request of lululemon shorts) that cause me to lose confidence in my ability to handle anything related to motherhood. I’ve mentioned before in this space that I have to guard my heart from becoming a manager instead of a mother. I can find myself being critical of my kids to protect my own self-image, my own desire for others to think I’m a good mom. Shouting “BE KIND!” in an aggressive manner in public, or when my kids are playing with friends, doesn’t necessarily
give a consistent message of kindness. I am a hypocrite (“No you can’t have a coke; it’s bad for you,” as I am on my third of the day), I am self-protecting, and I lose my temper. Why? Ultimately, because left to my own devices and desires, I am ill-equipped to love my kids well. All of us, as sinners, can’t possibly master all the intricacies of motherhood. Because of this, I often find myself in the same
“Reliant prayer puts me in
the right place. It reminds me that my inadequacies have been covered in the blood of Jesus. We have been restored, redeemed, and renewed each day because God made a way for you and me.
”
battle I found myself in during my teenage years: a complete lack of self-confidence. Lying down at night with a list of things I should have done differently that day — it can be the song playing on repeat in my head. As our church has been going through a sermon series covering the power of unlikely heroes, namely Gideon in the book of Judges, I have been reminded repeatedly of God’s goodness in never leaving us on our own, His faithfulness in providing strength when we are
weak, and ultimately His love in pointing us to Himself each day. I was struck recently with one point in the sermon: “God wants us reliant, not confident.” Isn’t this what parenting is all about? Relying on the Father’s protection, His wisdom, His grace when we inevitably get it wrong, His strength when the broken world lets our kids down, His peace when everything around us is anything but peaceful? Reliant prayers, I believe, look different than what I often find myself praying. Reliant prayers are simpler, more powerful, and more the right view of Who actually is in control. Reliant prayer says, “God, help me. God, I need you. God, show Yourself to me. God, guard my children’s hearts and minds today as they learn to seek You. God, You are the Creator and the Sustainer; show me Your way.” Reliant prayer puts me in the right place. It reminds me that my inadequacies have been covered in the blood of Jesus. We have been restored, redeemed, and renewed each day because God made a way for you and me to have an unlikely hero: a baby born in a manger, who became a servant and King who died a death we deserved to bring us eternal life and Hope everlasting when we fall short.
Y Libbo Haskins Crosswhite and her husband, Clay, live in Madison and attend Pinelake. They have one daughter, Mary Thomas, who is 8 years old, and a son, Russell, who is 5 years old. She is the high school guidance counselor at Madison-Ridgeland Academy and can be emailed at lcrosswhite@mrapats.org.
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HEALTH & WELLNESS
by MANDY BUFKIN
Tips for talking with your child about mental health
T
he events of 2020 and 2021 have put a serious strain on everyone’s mental health. Now more than ever, your mental
verbalize what’s going on behind those behaviors. “A cool thing about therapy is (that) I get to use play therapy, which really relaxes them. With a recent client, he told me he was nervous as health is important. People feel isolated by COVID, divided by he arrived. When he came into my office, he saw the balls and fidgets politics, and polarized as a nation. When we aren’t sure how to handle (and) he wasn’t nervous anymore. We started to play and get to know our own mental health needs as adults, it can be a struggle to approach each other. Then, I was able to really start talking our children about their mental health. However, to him about helping him have a better day at it is not a conversation parents can delay. school.” According to the Mississippi Department of Regardless of age, look for any signs of Mental Health, suicide is the third leading cause When your child confides changed behaviors, such as being withdrawn, of death among young people ages 15-24 in in you, try to remain unusually hyperactive, or extremely emotional. Mississippi. With such a staggering statistic, Other signs to look out for may be unexplained parents must know how to approach tough calm (even if you don’t physical illness such as a recurring stomachache topics with their kids. feel calm). Overreacting, or sore throat. These physical symptoms can be a October 10 is World Mental Health Day and sign of hidden anxiety or stress. is a day to bring awareness to this oftenlecturing, or punishing As a parent, make sure to keep an open line stigmatized topic. This day of recognition also your child for sharing their of communication about all areas of your child’s provides an open door to approach the subject. feelings can damage trust life. Always remind them that you are a safe Allyson Young does this daily as a therapist at person and that they can talk to you about how Methodist Children’s Homes of Mississippi. For in the relationship. they are feeling. When your child confides in parents wanting to open the door to a tough you, try to remain calm (even if you don’t feel conversation, she says, “I think teenagers are calm). Overreacting, lecturing, or punishing your pretty real. They know when you are being real child for sharing their feelings can damage trust in the relationship. and honest. For one, they need to know that you care and that you are If you think your child may need to speak with a mental health going to be there for them. That’s there no judgment, and that you’re professional, contact Magnolia Youth Services, specializing in ages 3 to there genuinely to try to help them because you care about them. Being 21, at Methodist Children’s Homes of Mississippi. Contact a teenager is hard. admissions@mchms.org to schedule an appointment. Y “Give them the option to talk to a therapist. I’ve found that most times, they do. They want to talk to someone objective, someone outside of the issue that’s going on, to get some type of relief and understanding. Therapy can also be a great way to help them learn a new skill set, such Mandy Bufkin is a Jackson native and Belhaven University as how to deal with stressful situations. Ultimately, it starts with that alumna. As Director of Development at Methodist Children’s relationship and having a conversation.” Homes of Mississippi, she oversees fundraising, marketing, Of course, not all ages can tell you how they are feeling. “As a volunteers and events. Outside of work, Mandy enjoys (younger) child, it’s a little bit different,” Allyson says. “There may be reading and spending time with her husband, Craig, and son, behavior issues as your red flag, and the child may not be able to yet Ezra, at their home in Jackson.
“
”
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mschristianliving.com ❘ OCTOBER 2021 13
MISSION MISSISSIPPI MOMENTS
by BARBARA BEAVERS
Barbara Beavers (top left in blue and white shirt) and others pray at a prayer breakfast at The Salvation Army in Jackson in 2019.
Why we need to submit to each other
M
ission Mississippi’s theme for 2021 has been Greater Depth: Going Deeper with God and with One Another. When I was assigned the subject of submission, I was reminded of the story of the child who was being corrected by her parents to sit down and be still. Her
response was, “I am sitting down on the outside, but I am standing up on the inside.” There have been many times when I could relate to this, and I know that this attitude toward submission needs to change. I serve a Savior who is more concerned with what is going on inside me than with my outward appearance.
Submitting ourselves in any context in today’s culture is not viewed as a virtue. Selfexaltation and self-love rule the day. “I won’t stand in anyone’s shadow; no one will make me his doormat,” are attitudes that are more preferred than deference, civility, humility or “turning the other cheek,” which are the
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virtues that we are clearly commanded to embrace in the Bible. Our primary reason for what we do and how we treat each other should be “the fear of the Lord.” The way we treat each other is taken seriously by the Lord, and ultimately, we answer to Him for how we do it. The apostle Paul exhorted the church in Corinth to “allow yourself to be defrauded” (1 Corinthians 6:7) before turning to civil authorities to settle disputes in the church. In 2 Corinthians 5:15, he reminded them that Christ died for them so that they should “no longer live for themselves.” In Romans 12:10, Paul instructs us to “be kindly affectionate to one another with brotherly love; in honor preferring one another.” In Philippians 2:3-4, he says, “Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory (pride), but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than themselves. Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others.” Listening to one another and praying with and for one another, like we do in our biweekly Mission Mississippi prayer meetings, enables us to see things from a different
perspective. When I have a conflict with someone of a different opinion, I must deal with my own heart and not let my pride or personal preferences hinder my relationships. The Word of God must rule my actions. If it’s a political issue, I have to deal with His command to “be subject to the higher powers. For there is no power but of God; the powers that be are ordained of God” (Romans 13:1). If it’s a church matter, I must consider the Word of God: “Obey those that have the rule over you and submit yourselves to them, for they watch for your souls and must give account” (Hebrews 13:17). As a spouse, I must deal with submission according to His Word: “Wives, submit to your husbands as unto the Lord” (Ephesians 5:22). (On a personal note, I have been blessed with a husband who is giving his very life to honor and cherish me, often giving up his own comfort and desires to do so.) The good news is that we have a guide and a Good Shepherd who has shown us how to submit. The rule is to “lay our lives down for one another” (John 15:13). All we do in our interactions with one another is done “as unto the Lord.” What we want and need and
“must have” is irrelevant. Some would say, “It just isn’t fair!” and by a self-centered standard, it isn’t. The truth we live by is seen as foolishness to the world. Our guiding principle for our interactions with believers and unbelievers alike is, “Whoever will have his life shall lose it; and whoever will lose his life for My sake shall find it” (Matthew 16:25). Submitting to one another is a heart matter and not always easy, but the rewards are both temporal and eternal. Connecting with others and cultivating new relationships like we can do in Mission Mississippi activities helps us understand and appreciate one another. When we are rooted in the gospel, we are united in purpose. Join us, and to God be the glory! #SubmittingToOneAnother Y
Barbara and Jerry Beavers have been married for almost 50 years. Both retired and serving the Lord in a variety of positions, they have been involved with Mission Mississippi since its beginning.
mschristianliving.com ❘ OCTOBER 2021 15
THIS IS MY STORY
by GINNY OWENS
How I learned to sing in the dark
I
Hear Ginny Owens speak and sing live at our Fear to Faith Women’s Retreat on Saturday, October 30! See bit.ly/mclretreat21 or Katie’s Editor’s Letter on page 6 for details.
16 OCTOBER 2021 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
have loved music ever since I can remember. Melodies and lyrics move my mind and speak to my soul in ways nothing else does. I began plunking out songs on our secondhand upright piano when I was 2, singing my little heart out as I played “Jesus Loves Me” and “God is So Good.” After losing my eyesight a year later due to a degenerative eye condition, God gave me the courage to keep singing these lyrics — and to keep embracing them with a child’s faith. In my new book, “Singing in the Dark,” I approach the Bible as our ultimate songbook, guiding us in worship and in life. The more prominent its songs become in our hearts and minds, the more hope and peace we can experience in our everyday lives. Below is an excerpt that I pray will encourage you to sing hope, no matter what you might be facing. In Philippians 4:6-7, Paul tells us to not be anxious about anything. Instead, he said, take your requests and thankfulness to God, and peace that we can’t even comprehend will surround us and protect our minds in Jesus. Paul didn’t suggest that we not be anxious — he commanded it. Which shows, at the very least, that it’s possible to not be anxious. Why would he command us to do something that is impossible? Paul never said God would answer our worries according to our wishes. But he said, to paraphrase, “Don’t worry; pray.” The key here is bringing those worries to God with gratitude. In the Bible, we often hear of people full of fear about what was happening or devastated by what had happened, yet they recounted God’s faithfulness as they prayed. I have come to love recounting to God how He has been faithful, because it instantly changes my perspective. It’s mind-blowing that the God who spoke to Leah, Moses, and even Adam and Eve, also listens to and speaks to us and cares about our lives. Every night now, I make a gratitude list of at least five things I’m thankful for. No matter what kind of day I’ve had, I start writing as I pray, and I rarely end up with only five things on that list. By the time I get to my requests, I feel a renewed confidence and peace because, as I look back over my day and over the history of God’s faithfulness, I have a sense that even if my circumstances don’t change, He will guide me through, as He has always done.
We learn through Paul’s words to the Philippians that prayer is the place where God’s strength overpowers our weakness, and His faithfulness overcomes our fear. Without prayer, there is no singing in the dark. There’s no joy. No rest from anxiety. But prayer with gratitude enfolds our hearts with peace. In the midst of my most restless hour, as I began to practice what Paul commanded, things began to change. When I wasn’t on the road, I was at my home church, learning to be in community. I learned to forge ahead during the awkward moments of getting to know new people. I learned to keep showing up for small group, no matter how uncomfortable or even outright boring it could feel. And through sharing the lives of others, day in and day out, I gained a sense of grounding, leading to a peace I hadn’t experienced before. I also began to pray differently. I talked to God about everything that was going on, with a renewed belief that He saw and cared and could bring change. New community and a deeper attention to Scripture and prayer led to a bigger view of God and began the evolution of a new, more peaceful me. I started to learn how to fight my tendency to worry. Instead of being dominated by stressful circumstances, I began to train my mind to move in the opposite direction — toward the peace of Christ. Worry and restlessness are constant battles — battles that most of us will face until eternity. And for some of us, medication is a life-changing aid. (Praise God for brilliant scientists.) But God also longs to give us lifealtering, soul-resonating peace through Himself, His Word, prayer, and community with other believers. Excerpted from Singing in the Dark by Ginny Owens and edited for length, © 2021. Used by permission of David C Cook. May not be further reproduced. All rights reserved. Y
Born and raised in Jackson, Ginny Owens is a singer-songwriter, recording artist, author, speaker, and laughter enthusiast. She lives in New York and is in her final year of seminary for a master of biblical studies.
If you aren’t sure whether you have a relationship with God or where you’ll go when you die, please don’t put this magazine down until you’ve read the following:
✝ THE PROBLEM
For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God. – Romans 3:23 For the wages of sin is death… – Romans 6:23a The natural result and consequence of our sin is eternal death, or hell (Revelation 20:15), separated from God. This is because God is completely perfect and holy (Matthew 5:48), and His justice demands that sin be punished (Proverbs 11:21).
✝ THE SOLUTION
…but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord. – Romans 6:23b But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. – Romans 5:8 Jesus Christ died in our place on the cross and took on the punishment for all our sins (Isaiah 53:4-6). Then God raised Him from the dead (John 20)!
✝ HOW TO RECEIVE SALVATION
If you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead, you will be saved. – Romans 10:9
✝ IS IT FOR ANYONE?
Trust in what Jesus has done for you — His death for your sins and His resurrection — and trust Him as Lord.
✝ THE RESULTS
For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved. – Romans 10:13
Therefore being justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. – Romans 5:1 For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. – Romans 8:38-39
✝ WHAT TO DO NEXT
So then faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by the word of God. – Romans 10:17 If you decided to trust in Jesus, grow in your faith by reading more of God’s Word in the Bible. We recommend the gospel of John (it comes just after Luke) as a good starting point — or Romans! Finding a church close to you that teaches faith in Christ is another important step. It’s crucial to spend time with other believers so we can encourage each other in our faith. If you have questions about anything on this page, please contact us at 601.896.1432, or send us a message on Facebook @MSChristianLiving, Instagram @mschristianmag or Twitter @MSChristLiving. mschristianliving.com ❘ OCTOBER 2021 17
COVER STORY
by KATIE EUBANKS
Jill and David Dale Honoring their ‘Bulldog’
“He just had this light about him,” Jill Dale said of her son, Campbell.
E
very September, 12-year-old Avery Dale picks out a birthday cake for a team of nurses at Batson Children’s Hospital in Jackson. The “3C nurses,” as Avery’s mother Jill calls them, took care of Avery’s twin brother, Campbell, during his bout with cancer in 2014 and 2015. “We’ve always kind of let (Avery) lead us in how she wants to honor him,” Jill says. “Campbell touched more people in five years than I ever will,” says his father, David Dale. And Campbell still hasn’t stopped impacting others, even six years after going home to Jesus.
The diagnosis and small graces Clockwise from top left: David, Jill, Stella Grace and Avery Dale.
During Campbell Dale’s cancer journey, he was able to meet the Mississippi State University football and baseball teams, be a “Bulldog for a Day,” and even watch cartoons in then-coach Dan Mullen’s office after undergoing radiation. Campbell made a big impression on everyone he met, Jill says. “He just had this light about him. You were drawn to him.” That included Mullen and MSU baseball player Wes Rea, who was a pallbearer at Campbell’s funeral. Rea is also helping organize a golf tournament happening later this month to benefit the Dales’ Campbell Bulldog Fund for pediatric cancer research. Find out more about the golf tournament and how to donate at Facebook.com/CampbellBulldog.
18 OCTOBER 2021 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
STEGALL IMAGERY
The Campbell Bulldog Fund
Jill and David, both Jackson natives, suffered a miscarriage and struggled to conceive before having twins Avery and Campbell in September 2009. They were born nearly two months early and spent three weeks in the neonatal intensive care unit (NICU). After that, things looked rosy. “They thrived at home, they were best friends, they loved each other,” Jill says. “They had their own language. Half the time, we didn’t know what they were saying.” They were so healthy, they didn’t even get ear infections. Then in February 2014, when the twins were about 4 and a half, the Dales noticed a bulge on Campbell’s abdomen. The bulge wasn’t that noticeable, so they just kept an eye on it over the weekend.
MCL Editor Katie Eubanks, right, interviews Avery, David and Jill Dale.
“My thought from day one was, he’s going to be healed — whether here or in heaven,” David says. Jill’s mentor’s daughter had survived rhabdo years earlier. She was part of that 30 percent. Campbell could be part of that 30 percent too. After coming home from the hospital, Campbell was “back to normal, riding his bike, playing with Avery,” Jill says. “We look back now, and God was in every part of that.” In fact, over the next year and a half, God would show up countless times. For instance, David had seen a man in the elevator at Batson who looked familiar. “It was the guy who married us,” David says. “He was Jill’s youth pastor.” Also, the nurse anesthetist for the surgery turned out to be one of the Dales’ neighbors. From then on, “if she wasn’t there, her friend was there to take care of (Campbell),” Jill says.
“We knew that God was with us every step of the way.” That was an assurance they desperately needed.
Chemo, inflatables and gratitude In their minds, Jill and David thought, “We’re going to beat this.” “You have to (think that way). You’re your child’s advocate,” Jill says. In addition to the chemo, every day for 24 days, Campbell was sedated for full abdominal radiation. He never asked questions — about any of it. “We told him, ‘You’ve got some bo-bo’s on the inside and the doctors are going to take care of it,’” David recalls. Eventually, “he was so used to the hospital and the people, they had this special relationship,” Jill says. “Campbell’s quirky, and (his oncologist, Dr. Anderson Collier) knew that.
PHOTOS BY STEGALL IMAGERY
Early the next week, Campbell got upset and cried when trying to use the bathroom. The bulge got more noticeable. Jill and David took him to the doctor, and a CT scan revealed a mass in his abdomen. “(Someone said) ‘I’ve already called Batson. They’re waiting on you. Go now,’” David recalls. “The world started spinning. We were calling people to get Avery, calling family.” That Thursday at Batson, in a crowded conference room, doctors told the Dales, “We don’t know what it is, but we’ve got to get it.” Campbell’s first surgery happened that Friday. By the time he left the hospital, he’d been diagnosed with stage 4 rhabdomyosarcoma, which has a less than 30 percent survival rate. Doctors gave him a chemo port, and gave his parents a 3-inch-thick binder describing the chemo protocol they’d be following for the next year-plus.
mschristianliving.com ❘ OCTOBER 2021 19
Campbell with MSU baseball player Wes Rea.
Campbell with his oncologist, Dr. Anderson Collier.
Campbell with medical staff after completing radiation. 20 OCTOBER 2021 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
He knew what Campbell could handle (each) day.” After radiation, Campbell was back home — with a radiation “suntan” on his abdomen — and being his normal quirky self. For instance, he was a little OCD and liked things organized. He also had started speech therapy when he got sick. “He couldn’t say the word ‘sister,’” David says, so Campbell called Avery “Shoo.” “I called him ‘Boy,’” Avery adds. After being diagnosed in February 2014, Campbell didn’t slow down till November. Then he started having trouble urinating, David says. “The radiation had basically fried his bladder. He eventually was screaming because he couldn’t go.” Doctors gave him stents to help temporarily, but focused on getting him through chemo before fixing the problem for good. Every six weeks, his scans came back clear. “He once again rocked along,” Jill says. That fall, the Dales went big for the holidays. “We had Halloween (inflatable) blow-ups, we had Christmas blow-ups,” Jill says — all chosen by the twins. “We always said each day we would be thankful that God woke us up and that we could breathe another breath.”
Riding IV poles In April 2015, Campbell got to ring the bell at Batson. He’d finished chemo. Then the Monday after Easter, Dr. Collier called. Campbell’s final scans showed a tiny new spot that had to be removed. “We came in to have surgery, and they said, ‘Not today. We need to have the cardiovascular
doctor here,’” David says. “So we went to New Orleans that weekend.” “We knew if we went into lockdown again with him being immunocompromised (after surgery), we might not get another chance,” Jill explains. Meanwhile, she and David had found out she was pregnant. But before they could go in for Campbell’s surgery, she suffered another miscarriage. Campbell’s ultrasound happened the day after her D&C. “I don’t even know how I did it,” she says. At the end of April 2015, Campbell had his second surgery. Afterward, the Dales had four options: Bring back the drug that had hurt his bladder; try a treatment that had been used on breast cancer, since both it and rhabdo were sarcomas; see if St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital in Memphis had a clinical trial open; or take him home. “We weren’t ready for that (last option),” Jill says. “He wasn’t either,” David adds. They chose the first option and took
Meeting Pluto at Disney World. mschristianliving.com ❘ OCTOBER 2021 21
Campbell looking at the rainbow on the flight home from St. Jude.
Campbell to Batson for chemo infusions once a week for six weeks. Avery’s earliest memories are of being at the hospital with her brother. “When he would have to stay in the hospital at night, I would stay on the red foldout, and we would ride the IV poles (down the hall),” she says. Avery remembers waiting for the hospital playroom to open; getting her and Campbell’s picture made while being hoisted up in the air by football players; and never thinking twice about going straight to the hospital after school. “Even when he came home from the hospital, we’d sleep in the same room,” she says. Shoo and Boy were inseparable.
M&Ms and a Delta rainbow After the six-week treatment, Campbell’s reports came back. Dr. Collier was out, but Jill couldn’t wait: She called the nurse. “(The nurse) started reading off all the new spots, and I said, ‘Wait, I’ve got to write,’” Jill says. She’d been filling a red notebook with prayers, moments from her quiet times with God, and other details of Campbell’s journey. Both of Campbell’s initial spots had returned, and he had more spots on his lungs and back. “I called David, he came home, and we just cried,” Jill says. Even then, David says, “We couldn’t give up, because he felt so well. He was still doing laps through the house. But I knew in my heart … this was not going to be good.” The Dales decided to apply for a clinical trial at St. Jude. It could buy Campbell some time. “God was conforming our desires to His,” Jill says. “We went from, ‘Heal him on Earth,’ to ‘God, not my will but Yours.’” Jill’s sister-in-law’s friend was a nurse 22 OCTOBER 2021 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
practitioner for one of the leading sarcoma doctors at St. Jude. Another small grace. Jill called the man in charge of scheduling, sent him Campbell’s information on a tight deadline — and Campbell was accepted for the clinical trial. “We had prayed, ‘God, show us what to do and when to stop. Shut the doors You don’t want us to go through.’” This door was open. St. Jude staff asked, “Can Campbell swallow a pill?” The Dales said yes — then started training Campbell on how to swallow a pill. They used M&M Minis. He never graduated to regular M&Ms, so Jill and David were a little concerned. In Memphis, when Campbell was given his first capsule, “he drank some water, swallowed (the pill), and said, ‘Where’s my iPad?’” Jill recalls. He was totally unfazed. Another small (big) grace. Campbell went back to St. Jude regularly for checkups, and experienced no ill side effects from treatment. The weekend before the twins were to start school, the Dales noticed another bulge on Campbell’s abdomen. “You try to ignore it,” Jill says. “But by now you know what it looks like.” They wound up spending nine hours in the emergency room, with Campbell in pain. Eventually, the 5-year-old boy looked at one of the doctors and said, “‘Don’t just stand there. Get me something (for the pain),’” David recalls. “I busted out laughing.” “He was such a funny kid,” Jill says. The next morning, the Dales flew back to St. Jude, thanks to a friend of David’s who had a plane. “We thought we’d be (at St. Jude) for a couple weeks,” David says.“Jill took Campbell to the bathroom, and Dr. Frederico looked at me and said, ‘I’m so sorry. There’s nothing else (we can do).’”
On the flight home, in the midst of one of the worst moments of their lives, the Dales received another sign from the God who’d never left them: a rainbow, right in the middle of the Mississippi Delta.
Ready to go home Jill and David focused on making Campbell as comfortable and happy as possible. He underwent 10 days of radiation to take away the pain, David says. They had a Make-A-Wish party at The Country Club of Jackson, and hundreds of people came, including strangers who were praying for Campbell. “We said it was ‘Campbell’s last public appearance,’” Jill says, chuckling. A few days later, they flew to Disney World, where Campbell got to meet his favorite character, Pluto. “We could’ve come home (after that),” Jill says. “He’d always brought (his stuffed) Pluto to the hospital. I’ve never seen a kid smile that big.” Avery says the upstairs of their home still contains “thousands” of her and Campbell’s stuffed animals from Disney. Well, maybe not thousands, but a lot. On September 15, Jill’s birthday, Campbell spoke for the last time. “He was on oxygen (at home),” Jill recalls. “I love you,” she told him. “I love you, Mama.” “Are you ready to go home?” “Yes.” She knew he was talking about heaven. Three days later, David had slept with Campbell downstairs. When Jill came down, David said, “Today’s the day.” “I remember saying, ‘I’m not ready for this,’” Jill recalls. “I said, ‘I don’t want to watch my child die. Why do we have to do this? I can’t do mschristianliving.com ❘ OCTOBER 2021 22
this.’ You’re in denial and panic mode. But then you realize, it’s not by your strength alone. And God will give you what you need for each day to put one foot in front of the other.” At 2:55 p.m. on September 18, 2015, Campbell was taken off oxygen and quietly took his final breath on this side of eternity. One of the first verses he and Avery memorized at preschool is inscribed on his tombstone: “Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of heaven.” “Campbell knew we loved him,” Jill says. “But our greatest joy is that he knew God loved him.”
research and treatment for cancer in adults, but not as much for children. “It shouldn’t be that you can give a 60-yearold five to 10 more years, but you can’t give my kid tomorrow,” Jill says. In 2016, the Dales established the Campbell Bulldog Fund for Childhood Cancer Awareness and Research at the Community Foundation for Mississippi. They’ve raised $100,000 in five years. (See box on page 18 for Mississippi State connection.) “One thing we tell Avery is, ‘This life is not about you, not about us. God has put you here for a purpose,’” Jill says.
Mercy and (Stella) Grace Honoring their ‘Bulldog’ Every September — before buying one birthday cake for Avery and another for Campbell’s 3C nurses — the Dales start wearing blue and gold to bring awareness to childhood cancer. Jill knows that some parents who’ve lost children can’t get involved in “causes,” because it’s just too painful. But “we couldn’t walk away and do nothing. Because there’s another kid just like Campbell … another parent who’s been told, ‘There’s nothing we can do.’” Also, there have been huge advancements in
Jill and David had never planned to have another child. But after Campbell’s death, they thought, “If something happened to us, Avery would be all alone.” They decided that if they got pregnant again, that would be great. When they found out in 2016 that they were expecting, Lamentations 3:22-23 came to mind: “The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.” In February 2017, “Stella Grace came along and rocked our world,” Jill says.
“You see a lot of (Campbell) in her,” David says of Stella Grace. “She likes to line stuff up, like all the chip bags in the pantry. Sometimes I look at her and think, ‘Campbell, are you in there?’”
An ongoing impact “(Campbell) doesn’t even know the impact he had on us (and others), how our life was changed, how Avery’s life has been changed forever,” Jill says. “It was teaching us first of all to let go, because we were always the type to plan out everything. ‘My kids are going to go to this school … ’ But then it was, ‘He woke up today.’ “One thing we don’t say in our house is, ‘Life’s not fair,’” even though they know that’s true, Jill says. They know life’s not fair, but they also know a couple of more important things, more sharply than they could’ve known eight years ago: First, this world is not our permanent home. “There is something greater waiting (for believers),” Jill says. In the meantime, “no matter what happens, God’s going to take care of us.” Y
mschristianliving.com ❘ OCTOBER 2021 23
FEATURE STORY
by ANNA CLAIRE O’CAIN
From left, Outreach Coordinator Willie Cox, Administrative Assistant Bell Russell, and Pastor Jeff Parker at Southside Baptist Church in Jackson.
The church that stayed — and offers a glimpse of heaven
I
magine the day that believers are able to enter the gates of heaven in awe of our Savior’s presence. Picture
strolling the streets of gold and shouting praises to Jesus alongside the rest of His saints. In that beautiful place will be God’s people from all walks of life — from different areas, statuses and races. Then imagine getting to experience a small taste of such love and diversity in Mississippi’s capital city. Jeff Parker, pastor at Southside Baptist Church in south Jackson, describes just such an atmosphere when talking about his church. “I am a missionary at heart,” Jeff explains. “We had come home from Zimbabwe — we had lived in Zimbabwe, Africa, then in England. I’ve always sensed a calling to the African American community.” Jeff says, “‘Southside looks like heaven,’” as his wife, Sheila, often says. He explains, “We tend to look for homogenous people that look like us, act like us, dress like us, (are) educated like us, (are) economically about the same place we are. 24 OCTOBER 2021 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
(But) when you look at a church like Southside and you sit in there and you see the diversity, then you realize, ‘Hey, this is heaven. This is what heaven would look like.’ “You are able to hear the heart of other people that may not come out of the same social circles that you come out of, but you are able to hear the heart and the level of fellowship and understanding you normally wouldn’t have.” By welcoming these differences and obeying God’s call to serve, Pastor Jeff and the members of Southside are able to embrace diversity.
Opening the floodgates Over the years, becoming a racially diverse congregation is something that Pastor Jeff and the Southside staff have been passionate about. “The first thing is, and I have always believed this — I think it always comes down to leadership. I think that if you don’t have diversity in leadership, then you are not going to have diversity in a congregation,” Jeff explains. “What happened was, years and years ago we
had a white staff. I would say the only person that was anything other (than white) was the custodian, who was African American. I felt strongly that diversity needed to be in our pastoral staff.” Jeff shares that church leadership must have a heart for reaching people of all races. “I think sometimes, just like on a mission field, you have to know the heart of people. Whatever the nationality, ethnicity, language or culture.” Desiring to promote diversity and reach the heart of the African American community, Southside hired an African American man as their co-minister of youth. He later went on to serve as associate pastor, then co-pastor. “That began to open the door to children and young people feeling as if when they came into that church, that there was diversity in the leadership,” Jeff says. Children, youth and adults from various areas, statuses and races flooded through the doors. While that original co-pastor no longer serves at Southside, “we are trying to fill (that) position
and hope to at some point in the future,” Jeff says. Southside employs people of color in key positions of leadership and outreach. Embracing diversity in a changing neighborhood does not come without its challenges, though. Jeff explains that many other evangelical churches in the area have moved or shut down entirely. “Churches were exiting, leaving, getting out — I just had a real hard time with that. I felt like that was contrary to the scripture — to the Great Commission.” Jeff continues, “Watching churches leave and walk away from what I believe is a mission field, (all) because of racial transition — the racial makeup changing, economics — for whatever reason, to me it just seemed like … ‘Who’s going to continue to be that voice of truth?’ We just need strong churches in the city.” With a heart burdened for the African American community and a desire to fulfill the Great Commission, Jeff and members of Southside have stayed in south Jackson and continue to make a difference.
‘I just thank God.’ “Everybody just shows love, and they greet you with love,” says Southside staff member Willie Cox, who keeps the church’s ministry going by doing everything from cooking meals to groundskeeping to giving people rides to Wednesday dinner.
Willie describes the atmosphere at Southside: “We have a nice crowd on Sundays. Sunday school starts at 9. We have breakfast for Sunday school, then we have worship at 10.” In explaining his role at Southside, he says, “I do everything,” and chuckles. “I really don’t have a title (the website lists him as Outreach Coordinator), but I do everything. I’m the groundskeeper, I’m the maintenance man, I cook breakfast on Sunday mornings and Wednesday evenings. “Wednesday evenings we have two different types of soup — I help with it. I pick up the people that need a ride. They call me and I will go pick them up in the van, take them back and forth to church. I go out and feed the homeless on Tuesdays and Wednesdays.” As he serves those in need inside and outside of the church walls, Willie recalls a time when he needed a helping hand: “At one time I was on drugs real bad — it has been about 20 years ago —and I came up here to this church and I asked brother Jeff could he get me a bus ticket to Memphis, and he bought me a bus ticket. To me, that saved my life,” Willie says. “I went into a rehab and got out and I prayed and asked the Lord to deliver me, and He did. So I just thank God.” Today, Willie works with Southside as they strive to offer others the same hope he found in Christ many years ago.
‘It happens every day.’ Southside member Bell Russell also works at the church part time and is often the first point of contact for those who reach out for help: “Mostly I am like a part-time administrative assistant. I answer phones, I minister to those who come up and knock at the door — sometimes we have people who come looking for prayer or encouragement. It just depends on who rings the phone or knocks on the door — (we’re) just basically trying to meet the needs of the community,” Bell says.
“Everybody just shows love (at Southside),” said Outreach Coordinator Willie Cox, pictured at far right praying with Pastor Jeff Parker on September 26.
mschristianliving.com ❘ OCTOBER 2021 25
“I think each person individually brings their own form of community, worship and ministry to Southside as a whole,” Administrative Assistant Bell Russell said.
Part of Southside’s ministry is especially dear to her heart: “Counseling — that’s my favorite part. Meeting and talking to and inviting the people in the community to come out and hang out.” One unique ministry at Southside gets the little ones involved: “Every fourth Wednesday, a wonderful leader, Bethany, has this little store. Through the week, the kids can come to church, and they can earn what we call Southside Bucks. Every fourth (Wednesday) night, they get to spend them in the store that she made, and they love it. It’s like kiddie heaven,” Bell says. “It’s probably one of my favorite nights because (of) the look on their faces from all the hard work, learning verses, bringing their Bibles to class, bringing friends to class, remembering, answering questions — there’s a million ways they can earn the Bucks.”
Bell shares some additional ways that she and other Southside members serve their community: “Outside of spreading the Word of God, we have a food pantry that ministers to anybody who’s hungry or down on their luck and in need of food. We have a clothing closet (and) twice a year we have community meals on Thanksgiving and Christmas where we open up the clothing closet and basically ask people to clean it out,” Bell says with a chuckle. “Willie carries sack lunches in and around the community to the homeless. We also have a sack lunch meal where they come and ring the doorbell and get something,” she says. “If you need it, ask for it. It’s just a bunch of people looking to serve God. I think each person individually brings their own form of community, worship and ministry to Southside as a whole. I think that’s what makes it a unique church because we’re not just doing it at Southside.
“We learn it at Southside, then we go out into the community, and we share it with those in the community — whether it is the community of Pelahatchie, or Brandon, or Pearl, or Clinton, or wherever one of our members stays. Southside just doesn’t happen on Wednesdays and Sundays. I feel like it happens every day.” Showing God’s love each day to all people is what the staff and members of Southside Baptist Church aim to do. By overcoming obstacles and serving together, Southside members from south Jackson and the metro area get a small glimpse of what we will all one day experience when we are embraced by the arms of Jesus.
Y For more information about Southside Baptist Church, visit ssbaptistchurch.com or call 601.372.9161.
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FOOD FOR THOUGHT
by CAMILLE MORRIS
Friends and family faves for fall
F
or our October recipes, we called on MCL’s own staff and their families and friends. You probably read about MCL Editor Katie Eubanks’ mentor, Teddie Faye
Raines, in our August issue — but what you might not know is that Raines’ husband is a talented cook! Katie’s been making a deer-sausage variation of Dan Raines’ chili recipe. Also check out a super easy vegetable recipe from the Eubanks clan, and a delicious cake from Managing Editor Suzanne Durfey’s mom! Y
QUICK AND EASY STOVETOP CHILI 1½ 1 2 1½ 2 1 1 1 ¼
PERFECT OVEN-ROASTED BROCCOLI* *And/or cauliflower; both are delicious! 3 heads of broccoli and/or cauliflower, chopped into small crowns (the smaller the better) 2 tablespoons olive oil ½ tablespoon garlic powder 1 teaspoon salt 1 teaspoon black pepper (optional) NOTE: All amounts are approximate!
Preheat oven to 450 degrees. Place half of chopped broccoli and/or cauliflower into a large zip-seal bag. Drizzle half the olive oil into bag (err on the light side; better to add more later if needed). Seal bag and maneuver veggies around so they get a light coating of oil but aren’t soaked. Add more oil and repeat if needed, then complete the same process for remaining veggies. Dump veggies into two large glass pans. Season with garlic powder, salt and pepper. Bake 30 minutes or until veggies reach your desired “done-ness.” This recipe also works for portobello mushrooms, or for carrots sliced thin.
FRESH APPLE CAKE 2 2 3 1 3
cups self-rising flour cups sugar eggs cup canola oil cups Granny Smith apples, peeled and chopped 1 cup pecans, chopped 1 cup white raisins 1 tablespoon vanilla Baker’s spray with flour (like Baker’s Joy) Powdered sugar for garnish if desired
Preheat oven to 300 degrees. Peel, core and chop apples. Combine flour, sugar, eggs and oil, and mix for 5 minutes. Add next four ingredients and mix well. Prepare a tube or bundt pan with baking spray. Pour in cake batter and bake 1½ hours. A toothpick inserted should come out clean when cake is ready. Garnish with powdered sugar if desired. Great warm or at room temperature.
Happy Fall
1 1 ½ ½ to 1
pounds lean ground beef medium onion, chopped cloves garlic (or 1 teaspoon garlic powder) tablespoons light cooking oil rounded tablespoons flour can crushed tomatoes (16-ounce) jar mild, medium or hot chunky salsa teaspoon ground cumin teaspoon crushed red pepper flakes (optional for heat) rounded tablespoon chili powder Salt and black pepper to taste can of your favorite beans, undrained cup black coffee (to cut the sweetness of the tomatoes; coffee can be optional) cup water or beef broth (optional if chili is too thick)
NOTE: After the whole mixture is assembled and cooked, taste the chili and add seasonings as needed.
Crumble beef into a large, thick/cast iron skillet or cooking pot that has the oil, on high heat. Stir while meat browns. Reduce heat to medium, add onion and garlic, and sauté until clear. When meat is brown, and onions and garlic are cooked, add flour and continue stirring until a light roux forms. Be sure flour is cooked enough that there’s no “raw” flour taste. Add tomatoes, salsa, beans and all seasonings. Stir well. Keep the heat up until mixture starts bubbling. Add coffee and water/broth if you plan to use them. (At this point, you could transfer the mixture to a slow cooker on low for 1-2 hours if time permits. Otherwise, continue as directions indicate.) Stir well and reduce heat to low. Let simmer 10-15 minutes, stirring from time to time. The chili is ready to eat, but if time permits, turn heat off and let the chili stand 30 minutes or more. If you do this, turn heat back up a few minutes before serving. This chili is good served with crackers or over corn chips. Can be garnished with chopped onions and shredded cheese. Y mschristianliving.com ❘ OCTOBER 2021 27
LAGNIAPPE
submitted by ST. CATHERINE’S VILLAGE
How a Life Plan Community can offer crucial socialization for seniors
A
s we navigate through the second year of a global healthcare crisis — one that is seeing new COVID-19 variants
threaten the delicate balance we’ve achieved between face-to-face interaction and safety — the toll it’s taking on our seniors remains a concern. Without socialization and stimulation, our physical, cognitive and emotional well-being can deteriorate as we age. That’s why Life Plan Communities that provide these services are taking on more importance than ever.
What is a Life Plan Community? A Life Plan Community, like St. Catherine’s Village in Madison, offers seniors housing with a continuum of care through their various stages of dependence, from independent living to assisted living to skilled nursing and even memory care if needed. An all-inclusive Life Plan Community allows residents to transition from one service level to another while remaining in a familiar environment.
How does a Life Plan Community support senior well-being? Numerous studies have proved that staying socially active supports a senior’s overall well-being by reducing stress and anxiety and lowering the risk of depression, which often stems from isolation. At St. Catherine’s, numerous activities and events are available daily to keep residents engaged with each other. For physical health, the Life Plan Community provides exercise classes and wellness programs. Support groups also are offered, as are chapel services to nurture residents’ spiritual lives.
Is it safe to move into a Life Plan Community now? Yes. St. Catherine’s Village specifically has implemented many additional protocols to help keep residents, staff and family members safe during the pandemic. Even prior to the COVID-19 outbreak, St. Catherine’s adhered to best practices for cleanliness and hygiene, and implemented strict infection-control procedures. Before the start of each flu season, for example, the award-winning community requires not only
its staff be vaccinated, but also contract workers and private duty staff. This has garnered St. Catherine’s a place on the Immunization Action Coalition (IAC) Influenza Vaccination Honor Roll — the only Life Plan Community in the Jackson area to receive this designation.
The right care at the right time. While moving to a senior living community is a thoughtful decision at any time, many people are weighing the pros and cons more carefully now. Only you can determine if a Life Plan Community is the right choice for you or your loved ones. Be sure to do your own research, speak to experts, and tour St. Catherine’s to see firsthand the measures the Life Plan Community has in place to minimize health risks while providing high quality care and much needed social interaction for residents. Y To learn more about St. Catherine’s Village, visit StCatherinesVillage.com or call 601.856.0123 to schedule a tour.
I FOUND
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Find your peace of mind today! 28 OCTOBER 2021 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
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(601) 856-0123 www.StCatherinesVillage.com
THE DOCTOR IS IN
by MOLLY STALEY
Say goodbye to joint pain
W
hen joint pain or discomfort strikes, it can quickly have a negative effect on your life. It can keep you from enjoying your favorite activities, disrupt your sleep, or even cause you to become depressed. If any of this sounds familiar and you’re experiencing ongoing joint pain, don’t be afraid to reach out to an orthopedic doctor. Patients are usually pleased to hear that many bone and joint procedures can be addressed and treated conservatively with physical therapy, injections or medication. If all conservative options have been exhausted and patients are still experiencing significant pain or discomfort, surgery is typically the right answer. Due to advancements in orthopedic surgical procedures over the past decade, many surgeries that used to require a hospital stay can now be done in an outpatient setting. This option is more cost-efficient and convenient for patients and their family members.
“(If) you’re experiencing ongoing joint pain,
don’t be afraid to reach out to an orthopedic doctor. (Many) bone and joint procedures can be addressed and treated conservatively with physical therapy, injections or medication. If all conservative options have been exhausted … surgery is typically the right answer. (Many) surgeries that used to require a hospital stay can now be done in an outpatient setting.
compassionate care. We provide surgical services in a cost-effective manner, and our goal is to make a positive health impact on each patient’s life,” said Burnside. The team at Capital Ortho understands that there is anxiety that comes with visiting a doctor, but their team is fully committed to making the experience as comfortable and easy to understand as possible. “We pride ourselves on a strong physician/patient relationship. From the check-in process to actually seeing the patient, we feel like we form a close bond with the patient as they go through their ailment, their surgery and their recovery,” said Dr. Bradley Kellum, orthopedic surgeon at Capital Ortho, who specializes in the treatment of foot and ankle conditions. “Our goal is to get patients back to living their best life, whether that is playing outdoors with their grandchildren, running a 5K, or throwing the winning touchdown in a football game,” said Bedford. Don’t continue to let joint pain slow you down! No referral is required to schedule an examination with a Capital Ortho physician. Make an appointment for a consultation today at Flowood, Madison, Hazlehurst, Kosciusko or Magee, and get back to living your best life. Y Molly Staley is the marketing consultant for Capital Ortho. She lives in Brandon with her husband and two children.
SAY GOODBYE TO JOINT PAIN &
”
For these reasons, Capital Ortho is proud to say their Flowood campus is home to a full-service surgery center. “Specialty Surgical Center is a state-of-the-art facility catering to the orthopedic needs of patients throughout the state. We offer a variety of orthopedic services, including joint replacement procedures,” said Lea Anna Burnside, surgery center director. “Our patients have the luxury of having all their orthopedic needs met under one roof,” said Capital Ortho CEO Jeff Bedford. “From clinic visits with the doctor to physical therapy or surgery, our physicians walk through the process and communicate with the patient along the way, making sure all questions are answered and the patient is comfortable with the treatment plan.” Having an on-site surgical center and physical therapy clinic allows Capital Ortho to be more hands-on throughout the patient’s experience. Specifically, patients who are candidates for outpatient joint replacement surgery can expect faster recovery times than in the past. Physical therapists begin working with the patient on the day of surgery to develop an exercise plan that will help the patient regain full function of the joint as soon as possible. “Capital Ortho’s staff is dedicated to providing efficient, skilled,
SCHEDULE YOUR APPOINTMENT OR WALK IN TODAY! CAPITALORTHO.COM 601.987.8200
mschristianliving.com ❘ OCTOBER 2021 29
A CUP OF ENCOURAGEMENT
by LAURA LEE LEATHERS
Why you should keep a hymnal near your Bible ears ago, on a Focus on the Family program, I heard Joni Eareckson Tada say that we should keep a hymnal next to our Bibles. Why? Because
Y
with this hymn. How beautiful it is to hear the congregation sing, “Praise God, from whom all blessings flow … ”
theology is found in the hymns and promotes worship. Also, people memorize scripture better when it’s set to music. In my possession I have a collection of 12 hymnals. The oldest is The New Cokesbury Hymnal, copyright 1928, published by The Cokesbury Press. It cost 35 cents at the time of publication. I also have the hymnal from the church I attended as a child. I only use the hymnals when I’m practicing for a church service. Well, it’s time to change that habit! During a recent church service, we sang “Make Me A Channel of Blessing.” Later that day, I started thinking about other hymns that referenced blessings. I wrote down the titles I knew from memory and researched for more. As I looked at my list, I realized I had a short worship service. See if you agree. The following is a synopsis of the hymns. For the words, please use your hymnal or look them up on the Internet.
Hymnology 101
‘Bless His Holy Name’ This is one of the hymns written by Andraé Crouch, 1973. The hymn is based upon Psalm 103:1. The main lyric is, “Bless the Lord, O my soul, and all that is within me, Bless His holy name.” If you were reading Psalm 103, you could begin or end your reading with this hymn. ‘Come, Thou Fount of Every Blessing’ Written by Robert Robinson, the music is from an arrangement from The Sacred Harp by John Drakestone. My favorite lines are, “Tune my heart to sing Thy grace / Streams of mercy, never ceasing / Call for songs of loudest praise.” ‘There Shall Be Showers of Blessing’ The words are by Daniel W. Whittle, music by James McGranahan.
30 OCTOBER 2021 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
It adds so much meaning to the hymn when you know the story behind a particular melody. For example, many people are familiar with the stories behind “Amazing Grace,” “It Is Well with My Soul,” and “A Mighty Fortress Is Our God.” Also, who wrote the words and music? For example, was it Martin Luther, Charles Wesley, Fanny J. Crosby, Keith and Kristyn Getty, or Horatio G. Spafford? When did they write, and what was taking place in history? Robert J. Morgan has written extensively on hymn stories in “Then Sings My Soul,” Books 1 and 2. Another book is “40 Favorite Hymns on the Christian Life” by Leland Ryken. You can also find devotional books based on hymns. Also, I need to inform you that I don’t have a degree in music. I’m not a professional singer or a hymnologist. But I do love to sing and learn about hymns.
Sing of His blessings The hymn is based on Ezekiel 34:26, “I will send down showers in their season — showers of blessings.” ‘Count Your Blessings’ Johnson Oatman, Jr. wrote the words, and the music is by Edwin O. Excell. My favorite verse is number four: “So amid the conflict, whether great or small / Do not be discouraged, God is over all / Count your many blessings, angels will attend / Help and comfort give you to your journey’s end.” ‘Make Me a Channel of Blessing’ Words and music are by Harper G. Smyth. Verse two challenges me with these questions: “Are you burdened for those who are lost? / Have you urged upon those who are straying / The Savior who died on the cross?” ‘Doxology’ Words are by Thomas Ken, and the music is from the Genevan Psalter, 1551 edition, with composition attributed to Louis Bourgeois. Around the world, many church services end
As I sang my “blessing” hymns to the Lord, words like “mercy,” “grace” and “forgiveness” leaped off the page. I also saw a progression: adoration, His faithfulness, renewal, thankfulness, service, and praise (most hymnals categorize by topic). Perhaps this is why the psalmist wrote, “Make a joyful shout to the LORD, all you lands! Serve the LORD with gladness; Come before His presence with singing” (Psalm 100:12, NKJV). It’s time to start on a new habit, a hymnal next to my Bible. Have you got yours? Together, let’s sing of His blessings! Y Baptist Hymnal, Copyright 2008, LifeWay Worship, Nashville, Tennessee, Mike Harland, Project Executive, was the resource for this article.
In this new season of her life, Laura Lee hopes to focus on her three passions: freelance writing, sharing and serving through hospitality, and cultivating Lady Laura’s Garden, a cut-flower farm. You can contact her at LauraLeeLeathers.com.
TOUGH QUESTIONS
by DR. FRED HALL, LPC
How do I deal with losing loved ones to COVID? QUESTION: I have lost my mother to COVID, and several other friends as well. I am finding it so hard to deal with grief. What should I do to get through this? ANSWER: Let me first say I am sorry for your loss and can only imagine how difficult this must be for you. To deal with grief, you need to have a basic understanding of it. Grief refers to thoughts, feelings or behaviors connected to the loss of something important. It could be a person, a relationship or a thing. Bereavement refers to the period of mourning after the death of a loved one. Reactions to grief or bereavement include sadness, loss of appetite, preoccupation with the deceased, or the inability to function. Traditional healing of grief has often been seen through the lens of the Kübler-Ross model, or stages of grief. The five stages — denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance — have their place in understanding the various behaviors of the grieving person. Denial is usually the first stage, and it is a fundamental questioning of, “Did this really happen?” There is shock and disbelief. Anger comes in the form of, “Why me?” or, “Why them?” There is usually an anger against
someone or something, life itself, or God. Bargaining may be a way to put off dealing with the loss by “making a deal” with life or God if the person would not die or somehow come back. Depression is the accompanying sadness and lack of functioning when the reality sets in that the person is gone and no longer coming back. The grieving person may isolate themselves or lose their own will to live. Acceptance, the most desirable stage, is the acceptance of the loss even though there still may be pain involved. Calmness and a sense of normal life activities begin to happen again. Realistically speaking, the stages are not linear but cyclical. Another perhaps more appropriate way of working through grief is to look at and master the tasks of grief or mourning. This includes accepting the reality of the loss, processing the pain of grief, adjusting to the world without the deceased, and finding a way to remember the deceased while moving forward in the world. Accepting the loss of the loved one might
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Dr. Fred Hall is a licensed professional counselor (LPC), supervisor, life and leadership coach and consultant. He works with individuals, couples, families and organizations in training, speaking, consulting and clinical practice. He does clinical work at Cornerstone Counseling in Jackson.
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mean coming to terms both emotionally and mentally. Confronting emotions, even painful ones, means naming them and learning how to cope with them. Adjusting to the world without the deceased might involve internal, external and spiritual adjustments as the grieving person deals with their new reality. Remembering the deceased is a mix of celebrating the person, remembering them, and giving yourself permission to be happy, function, and love again. Think through, pray through, and attempt to ask people to help you deal with your grief and loss. Consult those who are trained in grief and loss, and give yourself time. You will smile and laugh again — hopefully soon. Y
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No other set of books, except the Bible, will prepare the reader for an abundant life NOW and for a glorious ETERNITY better than The Sound of Christmas Music, Hallelujah, Love & War and The Sound of Glorious Marriage Music. These books can be reviewed and purchased at amazon.com. Select Books and type in “by Joe Ragland.”
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ATTY JOE RAGLAND, J.D., LL.M., LL.D.
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Personal Injury Trial Attorney/Workplace Injuries Tel. 601-969-5050 • Info: www.raglandministries.org Click CONTACT to subscribe to Ragland Newsletters mschristianliving.com ❘ OCTOBER 2021 31
Do you see a LEADER when you look in the mirror? HIGH SCHOOL SENIORS: Share your story of faith and leadership for a chance to
receive a scholarship toward college tuition. Applications and instructions are available at MSChristianLiving.com or through school counselors. Application deadline: October 15.
Mississippi Christian Living, in partnership with Belhaven University, will honor our 14th class of Christian Leaders of the Future at an afternoon event on Belhaven’s campus on March 1, 2022. Two interactive back-to-back workshops will be followed by a reception, keynote speaker presentation, and awarding of two $2,000 scholarships.
Deadline O
ctober 15
For more information, email Suzanne Durfey at suzanne@mschristianliving.com or email katie@mschristianliving.com 32 OCTOBER 2021 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
RAVE REVIEWS
by CC ALLGOOD
‘Wounded Sheep: How to Calm a Storm’ “How to Calm a Storm” by Dr. Barbara L. Howard is a quick read that aims to provide a measure of strength and encouragement to anyone going through a personal trial. Dr. Howard uses the metaphor of a storm to walk the reader through a greater understanding of the challenges of life as a Christian, and through that a deeper knowledge of the Lord. Dr. Howard’s tone is straightforward and personal. She uses scriptural references to provide support to her points, and intersperses her own original poetry as part of the journey. In my opinion the book was a quick, easy read, and provided food for thought as I went through my day. It would make a good companion for a Sunday school series or Bible study. It is also something to read when you are struggling with your own storm and want a quick reminder that you are not alone, and that God’s power and grace have the ability to calm even the stormiest of seas. Y
WHAT’S GOING ON
by CHANDA ROBY, ESQ.
A new hope for REAL change
A
fter 23 years, giving away over $1.5 million, helping more than 25 organizations, and supporting rural communities in 12 Mississippi counties, Rural Education and Leadership Christian Foundation, Inc. (REAL) has a different kind of opportunity. This summer, REAL’s board formed the Dolphus and Rosie Weary Administrative Endowment (DRW), named in honor of REAL’s founders, for the purpose of establishing a perpetual resource to support REAL’s staff, so they can concentrate more on the mission of helping rural Christian ministries in Mississippi and less on the urgent need to cover basic operating expenses. When mature enough to draw a usable interest, this endowment will benefit REAL staff and management by supplementing Dolphus and Rosie Weary their fundraising efforts. Fundraising to give away proceeds is a positive nonprofit attribute, but it’s easy to forget that reasonable spending within any nonprofit is needed to adequately offer services to those in need and keep morale high among nonprofit service providers. If nonprofit staff members are in need themselves, cannot make a living wage or cannot afford healthcare, especially during this COVID pandemic, they cannot be effective in wholeheartedly helping others. For REAL, an endowment account for operating expenses could help address those needs. For many nonprofits like REAL, endowments make it possible to carry out their missions in the long term. Because of REAL’s four older endowments, REAL gives away $170,000 to $225,000 in grants and scholarships each year. Those interested in giving can support REAL staff now as they work to carry out the organization’s mission. Below are three ways to give. • By mail: P.O. Box 180059, Richland, MS 39218 • Online: realchristianfoundation.org/donate-now • On Cash App: $REALatWork
Books for hurting believers Wounded Sheep: How to Calm a Storm Sometimes we unknowingly allow the storms of life to wreak havoc in our homes and families. Here you will find how to increase your faith and seek shelter during these trials. Biblical scripture is applied to everyday life issues to achieve victory through Christ Jesus. Howard offers spiritual inspiration and includes unique Christian poetry as a form of understanding and healing.
Wounded Sheep: How to Heal Church Hurt “Have you ever been wounded be friendly fire? I daresay, unless you have been wounded by church hurt, you have not been wounded at all.” When it is the church family injecting deception and mistreatment into your life, it can be difficult to know where to turn. Howard looks at this issue through a biblical lens and offers insight along with Bible stories, poetry, and real experiences to help readers develop an understanding and heal their wounds.
Available online at Amazon and Barnes and Noble. For more information, visit
BarbaraLHoward.com
The message in all memo lines should read “Dolphus and Rosie Weary Administrative Endowment.” Y mschristianliving.com ❘ OCTOBER 2021 33
QUIPS & QUOTES ADVERTISER INDEX
{
CUT OUT THE SCRIPTURES AND QUOTES AND PLACE THEM AROUND YOUR HOME FOR DAILY ENCOURAGEMENT!
✂Spiritual maturity is a journey, not a destination. A growing relationship with God should be your highest priority. ~ Anonymous
}
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Belhaven University...................................................2 C Spire .................................................................................3 Capital Ortho ...............................................................29
There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.
Christian Leaders of the Future....................32 Covenant Caregivers................................................8
~ GALATIANS 3:28, BEREAN STUDY BIBLE
Dr. Barbara L. Howard, Author........................33
Cancer is such a wake-up call to remind us how high the cosmic stakes really are and how short and brief and frail life really is. ~ Joni Eareckson Tada
Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us. ~ ROMANS 3:3-5, NIV
Sometimes the things we can’t change end up changing us.
Fear to Faith Women’s Retreat.........................9
Jesus loves the little children, All the children of the world. Red and yellow, black and white, All are precious in His sight, Jesus loves the little children of the world. ~ Clarence Herbert Woolston
Fireplace Chimney Sweep Solutions ........31 First Presbyterian Day School .......................23 Gateway Rescue Mission ....................................13 Hartfield Academy.....................................................11 Joe Ragland...................................................................31 Lifeline Children’s Services ................................12
All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting people’s sins against them. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation. ~ 2 CORINTHIANS 5:19, NIV
~ Anonymous
Mascagni Wealth Management ...................36 Methodist Children’s Homes of Mississippi.............................................................13 Miskelly Furniture ........................................................5 Pine Grove Treatment Center ............................7 Power Financial Group..........................................10 Sitters, LLC....................................................................26 Smiles By Design, Dr. Eugene Brown, Jr. ..........................................15
Heal me, O LORD, and I shall be healed; save me, and I shall be saved, for you are my praise. ~ JEREMIAH 17:14, ESV
So if all of these trials bring me closer to You / Then I will walk through the fire / If You want me to. ~ Ginny Owens
Southern Farm Bureau Life Insurance Company...............................................11 St. Catherine’s Village ...........................................28 St. Dominic’s ................................................................35
Know your darkness has a purpose. Your trials have a purpose. A purpose to strengthen and deepen you as you write your colorful story. ~ Ginny Owens
34 OCTOBER 2021 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living
Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. ~ DEUTERONOMY 31:6, NIV
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