Mississippi Christian Living December 2022

MCL’s

of the Year

the gift every parent wants: peace of mind

Clockwise from top left: Christian Leaders of the Year Matt Nalker, Jonathan Lancaster, Preston Crowe, Angela Carson and Tom Washburn shared their insights on servant leadership. See cover story on page 18.

cover story

18 MCL’s Christian Leaders of the Year What you said about them, and what they’ve learned feature

26 Aaron and Lizzy Sibley Loss, lament, and moving forward

Coming next month

Mike and Amanda Clement on faith, marriage, and making it to Omaha

Aaron and Lizzy Sibley, shown here during their dating years, were not prepared for the loss of their son. But in their grief they’ve found healing through prayer, lament, counseling, and the company of loving believers. See page 26.

Mississippi Christian Living is committed to encouraging individuals in their daily lives by presenting the faith stories of others and by providing information that will point every person, at every stage of life, to a deeper, authentic, personal, and life-changing encounter with Jesus Christ. Views expressed in Mississippi Christian Living do not necessarily represent those of the publisher. Every effort has been made by the Mississippi Christian Living staff to insure accuracy of the publication contents. However, we do not guarantee the accuracy of all information nor the absence of errors and omissions; hence, no responsibility can be or is assumed. All Rights Reserved. Copyright 2022 by MS Christian Living, Inc.

Mississippi Christian Living is published monthly and is available for free at hightraffic locations throughout the tri-county area. Subscriptions are $29 a year.

POSTMASTER: Send change of address to Mississippi Christian Living, P.O. Box 1819, Madison, MS 39130.

He was worth the wait

On Valentine’s Day 2021, I visited the singles life group at Broadmoor Baptist Church in Madison and wound up meeting the man who is now my fiancé.

I didn’t hear a hallelujah chorus as he walked across the room to introduce himself after class. But I had noticed him asking questions that resonated with me during the lesson. And I did remind myself, “You often go for the nerdy types…” Because I am one.

I had not dated a lot, and I would later find out Stephen hadn’t dated at all. We were both in our 30s and had waited a long time. It seemed long to us, anyway.

The more I hung out with the Broadmoor singles, the more I grew interested in Stephen. He was always the one with the follow-up question for whoever was talking. “So what made you decide to do that?” or, “What do you like about (insert job here)?”

I found myself hoping he’d be at the lunches I crashed after church; hoping he’d ask me some of those probing questions. And he did.

In June 2021, Stephen invited me to a design show hosted by Crema, the company he works for. (He’s a web developer and designer.) I didn’t see any other women there from our group. Turns out he had invited some of them, but only because he wasn’t sure I wanted to be singled out. None of them could make it, which was fine by me.

We had some good conversation, and at the end of the night he said, “By the way … if you ever want to hang out … I’m free.”

“Yeah, sure, I’d love to,” I said. Then quietly, “Just let me know.”

The next afternoon, I sent him a message making myself abundantly clear:

“Hey, thanks so much again for inviting me last night! Would love to hang out again over food or a movie or something! … ”

Within 30 minutes, he texted me, and two nights later he officially asked me out. We went on our first date on June 23, 2021, became a couple on July 28, and said “I love you” on September 10. I’d been holding it in for a month.

I would’ve loved to be married within a year. That didn’t happen, for various reasons. Sometimes it’s been frustrating for one or both

of us, and other times we’ve known we weren’t ready. But in the waiting, we’ve gotten to know each other better, while discovering firsthand that we cannot meet each other’s deepest needs. Only God can.

Finally, when we were ready, Stephen got my parents’ blessing, bought the ring, and contrary to his nature, pulled a plan together on the fly during a Thanksgiving trip to Arkansas.

Late in the afternoon on Thanksgiving Day, Stephen and I drove up to Petit Jean State Park, one of my favorite places that also means a lot to both sides of my family. Still, I suspected nothing, as we’d just spent several hours with 30 of my relatives.

Surely both of us were too tired from all the food and socializing to deal with a proposal. Surely we were only going for the sunset.

Instead of a sunset, we encountered a thick gray fleece of fog, which was absolutely gorgeous. Then Stephen tricked me.

He suggested we film a silly slo-mo “hair flip” video, which we’d done before. He told me to stand facing away from him, and then whip around toward him. I kept “practicing” while he got the phone ready, and unbeknownst to me, he was also fishing the ring out of his pocket.

At one point I “whipped around” and he hastily jammed the ring box under his arm. I didn’t notice.

Finally, I said, “OK, tell me when you’re ready.”

“OK,” he said, now filming. “I’m ready.” And he knelt and held out the ring as I whipped around for the final time.

Between my shock, our laughter, and my exclamation of “You’re so sneaky!” we got engaged in the fog.

It’s only been a few days, so things still look a bit foggy. We’ve done zero wedding planning thus far; we might not get married as soon as we’d like (i.e., tomorrow). But I’m willing to wait.

I don’t have a cute segue into a spiritual lesson here — except to say that waiting for God’s best is always, always worth it. I hope y’all enjoy this edition of MCL and have a wonderful Christmas! Y

Katie Eubanks katie@mschristianliving.com

I’m sure I’ll be writing more about Stephen Ginn in the months and years to come!

38 years,

3 steps to keeping the jolly in Christmas

Black Friday has come and gone. Christmas season is in full swing. All the sights, sounds, lights, demands, parties, plans, schedules, shopping, wrapping, declarations, family recipes, recycled fruitcakes, ballgames … Everything that has culminated into the American Christmas experience has now engulfed us. We are in the express lane to December 25.

As a parent of six and a grandparent of nine, the cycle has only grown more robust and complex for me in the last 35 years. And honestly, I love it. I went through a season complaining about “commercialism” and “losing the meaning of Christmas” in my early years, but my wife quickly rescued me from that religious humbug inside of me!

But that doesn’t mean that both fears were not real. In fact, we CAN lose the true meaning of the season and even grow to almost dread it with all of its pulls — but we certainly don’t have to. Here are three things I’ve learned to help me keep Christmas an absolute favorite season:

Embrace the moments

We do many small and often imperceptible things throughout the holidays. Find a way to stop in those moments and enjoy them. Did you stop and get a spiced latte? Sit for five minutes and sip that coffee and chat with someone at the next table. Does your 4-year-old want to find a few decorations on the tree?

Take time to help them find that particular one that makes them so happy. These five-minute interludes in life create moments of oxygen that give everything else meaning.

Value the traditions

Growing up, we had many traditions. As we raised our children, many of those traditions we kept, some we did not, but many more we added. One in particular is sharing a deli sandwich with someone on Christmas Eve. Our first Christmas together, my wife and I had

very little money and just enough to split a roast beef sandwich at Metrocenter Mall. That is our tradition to this day. It reminds us of God’s amazing provision from when we had very little to times of abundance. Name two or three traditions that are important to you, why they are important, and encourage your family to also remember why they are important.

Sweet memories over perfect gifts

In one of my first Christmases buying for the children, I was agonizing over two different toys. Growing frustrated with my OCD analysis of which was better, my wife sighed and noted, “She will not know which one you did not get her.” As silly as it sounds, I realized I was fretting over finding the exact right gift rather than looking forward to playing with my daughter and her new toy or game. I began to envision enjoying the gift with her, and suddenly I could not make the wrong decision.

Let’s keep the jolly in this season, and have a very merry Christmas! Y

Dan Hall is an executive and strategic coach to leaders and executive teams. He also works with organizations on team building, conflict resolution and communication skills. He and his wife, Hazel, have six children and four grandchildren. You can reach him at Dan@OnCourseSolutions.com.

Fabulous Activities ✻ Beautiful Surroundings New Found Friendships ✻ Fine Dining

200 SERENITY LANE, MADISON, MS 39110

sunnybrookestates.net

Sunnybrook Estates is a strictly rental independent living retirement community offering spacious apartment living. Low monthly rates with NO long-term lease or buy in required. Rent includes meals, housekeeping, transportation, activities, on-site movie theatre, central heat and air in each apartment and more!

“ Our first Christmas together, my wife and I had very little money and just enough to split a roast beef sandwich at Metrocenter Mall. (Sharing a deli sandwich on Christmas Eve) is our tradition to this day. It reminds us of God’s amazing provision from when we had very little to times of abundance.”

Mother, you have everything you need

God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work. – 2 Corinthians 9:8, NIV

Motherhood is one of the beloved dreams most women desire. Many hours are spent imagining a picture-perfect life as a mother — hoping for the opportunity to carry life, to give life, and to guide a precious life into adulthood. But is there really such a thing as a picture-perfect life as a mother?

The ideal of motherhood may be a perfect picture, yet the reality of motherhood is more of an abstract creation. It is more like the journey of an artist than that of a scientist, with blazing seasons of drought or days that can change from sunshine to rain as quickly as lightning in a storm. True to the style of an artist, the picture of motherhood is one that can tell a depth of stories.

As a teenager, I came to love abstract art. It was a place where I could create whatever I wanted, and it was still art. I could take a perfect photo and make it whatever my heart imagined it to be. Today, as a mother of two, there are times when I wish I could pick up a paintbrush and create a picture of perfection in my relationship with my children; however, life doesn’t afford me that luxury. Instead, as a Christian believer, I have found that God has given us mothers the tools we need to succeed in every season and in every good work.

The tools God gives us as mothers include prayer. It is in my time of prayer that I am drawn to God, our Heavenly Father, for His comfort, which I find as I pour out my heart’s concerns; I feel the warmth of His power rejuvenate me. God also provides the tools of knowledge, understanding and wisdom as I enjoy reading His words. He reveals His truths in ways that help me navigate situations with my children that I can’t seem to handle on my own.

God knows what we need. As we seek Him and honor Him, there are blessings that open in our lives. God — the Creator of the greatest art, the world — provides opportunities to walk out His words in obedience to Him before my children so that they too can learn of His goodness and the importance of following Him. Even when the picture presented isn’t a

perfect one, on my part or my children’s.

I have come to trust in the Lord God with all my heart because He shows me the direction to go when my heart is overcome with fear of the unknown. I take heart in remembering God knows how to knit things together when our family disagrees, and when our hearts begin breaking due to misunderstanding. It is our God — our matchless Creator – who, true to His Word in 2 Corinthians 9:8, is able to bless you abundantly so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.

Y

Dr. LaTesha W. Thomas is owner and operator of PACE Synervations LLC, which is a private counseling, Christian life coaching and consulting practice; and she works as a full-time social worker with the Mississippi State Department of Health. LaTesha can be found at facebook.com/latesha.thomas.9; on her business Facebook page, PACE Synervations Counseling, Coaching & Consulting; and on YouTube and Instagram as LaTesha W.Thomas. You may also email her at info@pacesynervations.com.

“ I wish I could pick up a paintbrush and create a picture of perfection in my relationship with my children; however, life doesn’t afford me that luxury. Instead, as a Christian believer, I have found that God has given us mothers the tools we need to succeed in every season.”

6 tips for staying healthy during the holidays

The holiday hustle and bustle is in full swing, and for many of us that can feel like a losing battle when it comes to maintaining our health and fitness goals. I personally can think of five gatherings I’ll be attending where the temptation of all my favorite comfort foods will be luring me in.

As someone who has struggled on both ends of the spectrum, from an eating disorder to carelessly binging, I know that neither option brings about healthy results — nor does it glorify our God. Therefore, I have curated six tips that will encourage us to become more mindful, self-controlled and confident over our food choices this holiday season — tips that do not deprive us from enjoying our favorite foods but will carry valuable momentum into the New Year!

1Pray. God loves us so dearly that He gave us a plethora of beautiful foods to enjoy and freedom of choice in those foods; however, they should not be the center of our joy. Pray that the people around our tables will bring us more joy than the foods on our tables. With this mindset we are more focused on the hearts of our people than the food that is offered, which will help us not to overindulge and regret it later.

2

Set yourself and your environment up for success. Volunteer to bring a healthier dish, one that you personally love, so you will gravitate toward this dish instead of ones that will leave you in regret.

3Don’t skip the workout. Whether it’s a brisk walk around the neighborhood or your typical workout session, get your body moving and the endorphins flowing. Those endorphins can subconsciously carry over into your choices when it comes time to eat.

4

Drink your water. A good rule of thumb is to drink a glass of water every hour. I personally love spicing up my water with lemons, cucumbers and orange slices. Add a few to your water and enjoy the added benefits and flavor!

5Develop a game plan. Decide before you go which treat you’re going to allow yourself to enjoy. Have you been thinking about the chocolate pie all day? Then go in knowing you are going to enjoy a piece! Remember we are not depriving ourselves, we are simply learning to practice self-control. Having a plan for what you’ll allow yourself to enjoy, and how much of it, is a great place to start.

6

Focus on the next right choice. I get it. It can be overwhelming. We have to give ourselves grace in this season, but if we can focus on just making the next right choice, it can feel like less of a monster to deal with.

Remember, there will be a lot of things outside our control! Do not let that make you lose sight of what God HAS given you and me the gift of CHOICE over. Food is a gift from God, but it should not become our god; and as always, give yourself GRACE over this holiday season. Let it reveal to you where you can grow in Christ more. Christ meets our weakness with His strength. Y

Jade Whitehurst is a wife, mom, fitness coach and eighth-grade science teacher. You can follow her on Instagram @jadewhitehurst_fit (aka The Faith Fit Mom).

Christmas Time!

There’s excitement in the air! You can feel it everywhere!

Christmas Time is FINALLY here...

Filling our hearts with love and cheer!

There’s expectation in their eyes–As kids look for Santa across the skies! It’s hard to describe the feeling of joy Found on the faces of each girl and boy!

In the churches, the malls, or down the street...

The children are telling everyone they meet, “Santa’s Coming!” they say with a grin! “Yes, Santa Claus is coming again!”

“We’ve been ready for him for weeks, you see...

With the decorations and our Christmas Tree!

Soon, we’ll put out milk and cookies, too!

I wonder what Santa will bring for you!?”

But, when they awaken on Christmas morn–How many remember their Savior was born?

As they take gifts from under the tree; Will they remember Calvary? Will they remember how He died on that Cross, To keep all people from being lost?

Or, that He rose again the Third Day? He paid the price we could not pay!

Because of Jesus, we won’t die in sin; And better yet, HE is coming again!

He’ll take us to a far more wonderful place, Where we’ll see Him daily Face to Face!

So, as you take gifts from under your tree–Remember God’s Gift to you and to me!

The TRUE meaning of Christmas will be very clear! And, best of all; it will last all year!

There’s excitement in the air! You can feel it everywhere! Christmas Time is ALWAYS here...Filling our hearts with love and cheer! There’s expectation in our eyes–As we look for JESUS across the Skies! In the churches, the malls or down the street... His children are telling everyone they meet, “JESUS is coming!!” they say with a grin! “Jesus Christ is coming again!”

“I’ve been ready for Him a while, you see... I’d love to take you to Heaven with me!! Soon He’ll be here! You’ll know it, too!”

I wonder if Jesus is coming for You?!”

Merry CHRISTMAS and a Blessed 2023!

Don’t let fear keep you from serving

Mission Mississippi’s December theme, “Deeper Service,” requires us to examine our hearts and minds to give considerable thought to what it means to serve, just as the believers in Acts 2:44-47. Often, we are willing to give of ourselves if it doesn’t lead to a point of discomfort in our lives. Beliefs, opinions, differences, and even the inability to forgive can cloud our judgment when called to serve others. When this occurs, do we really have a love for service?

Service is looking beyond our own obstacles and needs in order to give meaningful help and support in benefit of another person or group.

The Bible tells us in Matthew 25:40, “And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.” As Christians, we are called to demonstrate a love so clear for one another that it allows those we

encounter to see Christlike characteristics within us.

Each of us has an opportunity to be a part of life-changing moments for others. It requires us to shed the cover of comfort and the cloak of fear. Discomfort and fear can sometimes hinder us from deeper service because of our own insecurities and fear of judgment. As the actor and activist Jesse Williams said in a recent award acceptance speech, “Afraid? OK, do it afraid.” We cannot let any hindrance keep us from doing God’s work. The reward is greater.

In one of my most recent experiences, youth who reside more than 1,000 miles away from the city of Jackson held a fundraiser on behalf of the residents who are facing obstacles due to the ongoing water crisis. They didn’t know what the people they were serving looked like, what the people’s opinions were, or what stance anyone else was taking. These students simply wanted to help. The commitment and dedication of these students showed that they were in fact “people for others.”

When we see how these children are unafraid and willing to help, we know our future is bright with them as leaders. It also serves as a reminder of the Golden Rule: “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”

These acts of generosity and kindness can be defining moments for us as adults. It fills our hearts with joy and gladness to know that there are young people who are great examples of agape love. It teaches us that the best leaders

are better servants, and they lead with love. Love connects us because we are ALL God’s children, no matter what we look like or who we are. The second greatest commandment from God is, “Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself.” – Matthew 22:39. We must always keep this commandment in our hearts and minds.

In true service, be unafraid, be open, be dedicated, and lead with love.

I value my connection with Mission Mississippi. The ministry work being done through them helps us to connect with others to develop and cultivate long-lasting relationships across racial lines. To all our brothers and sisters, take a stand and continue to keep your hope in God’s word. Y

Thomas is executive director of Catholic Charities Inc. of Jackson and is married to Ronnie Thomas. Wanda and Ronnie are members of Greater Pearlie Grove Missionary Baptist Church in Jackson.

Wanda

“ Beliefs, opinions, differences, and even the inability to forgive can cloud our judgment when called to serve ... When this occurs, do we really have a love for service?”

Catholic Charities team members pose for a photo during a back-to-school giveaway where the organization provided children with school supplies, lunch, activities and more.

Early specialization in youth sports: How much is too much?

Sports specialization is the act of participating in and/or training for a single sport year-round. With increasing numbers and popularity of travel leagues for youth sports, sports specialization is becoming more common for young athletes. A growing number of coaches, parents and children believe that to become a superior athlete, they must play one sport from an early age year-round. The pursuit of sports scholarships and professional contracts is a primary factor driving sports specialization at an early age.

What are the effects of sports specialization?

Sports specialization in youth athletes is an evolving health issue. It may lead to physical, mental and psychosocial harm such as injury, illness and burnout. These detrimental effects may result in the athlete lacking the ability or desire to participate in sports as an ongoing lifestyle choice.

Overtraining syndrome, or “burnout,” is the result of repeated, strenuous training sessions without adequate rest to allow for proper recovery. Overtraining syndrome is characterized by a decrease in performance, chronic muscle or joint pain, lack of enthusiasm about practice, and personality changes. Overtraining syndrome could last for several months and could ruin an athlete’s career.

A study by the University of Wisconsin School of Medicine and Public Health included more than 1,500 high-school athletes and found that those who specialized in one sport were twice as likely to report a lower extremity injury as compared to those who played multiple sports.

Is early sports specialization necessary to play college sports?

No! According to a study that analyzed more than 300 NCAA Division I athletes from 19 different sports, 45 percent of athletes played multiple sports until they were 16. Only 17 percent specialized by age 12 or younger, and those were athletes from tennis, swimming and fencing.

On average, team sport athletes specialized at age 15.5, and individual sport athletes specialized at 14. College coaches have also reported that they prefer multiple sport athletes because they perceive them to perform better at the intercollegiate level.

What are the benefits to playing multiple sports?

Participating in multiple sports allows athletes to work different muscle groups and have the chance to take part in activities that target both strength and endurance. It helps to develop overall athleticism and physical literacy. Developing the fundamental movement skills required for all sports is the key to athletic success. Focusing on strength, power, endurance, agility, balance and coordination should be done prior to developing more sport-specific skills.

Recommendations

The National Athletic Trainer’s Association’s official statement was in support of the following recommendations relating to the health and wellbeing of adolescent and young athletes:

Delay specializing in a single sport for as long as possible. Adolescent and young athletes should strive to participate in, or sample, a variety of sports. This recommendation supports general physical fitness, athleticism and reduced risk of injury.

One team at a time. Adolescent and young athletes should participate in one organized sport per season. Many adolescent and young athletes participate or train year-round in a single sport, while competing in other organized sports simultaneously. Total volume of organized sport participation per season is an important risk factor for injury.

Less than eight months per year. Adolescent and young athletes should not play a single sport more than eight months per year.

No more hours/week than age in years. Adolescent and young athletes should not participate in organized sport and/or activity more hours per week than their age (i.e., a 12-year-old athlete should not participate in more than 12 hours per week of organized sport).

Two days of rest per week. Adolescent and young athletes should have a minimum of two days off per week from organized training and competition. Athletes should not participate in other organized team sports, competitions and or/training on rest and recovery days.

Rest and recovery time from organized sport participation. Adolescent and young athletes should spend time away from organized sport and/or activity at the end of each competitive season. This allows for physical and mental recovery, promotes health and wellbeing, and minimizes injury risk and burnout/dropout. Y

Source: National Sports Medicine Institute

Sinners welcome at men’s prayer gathering

Every Tuesday from 6 to 7 p.m., 20 or 30 men from across the metro area meet at Mama Hamil’s in Madison. Some are ex-cons, some are pastors, some are regular guys, and some are multimillionaires. No, the buffet isn’t open for Tuesday supper. These men are there to pray for each other.

The group will start its 14th year in January and was established after local businessowner John Gooch, known by family and friends as Johnny, felt God telling him, “Men need to pray.” John called his friends Jim Palmer and Kenny Crews and asked if they wanted to start a men’s prayer group.

Since that time, 400 to 500 men have attended, whether for one night or many years. But it’s not about the numbers. It’s about Jesus.

In the cave of Adullam

Though the gathering is known as the “Tuesday night men’s prayer group,” John often thinks of it as “the Adullam group,” as in 1 Samuel 22, when David hid from King Saul in the cave of Adullam and “God sent him all the men that were distressed,” John says.

“Sinners are welcome. … We’ve seen men show up so drunk they can’t get out of their car — so we go to their car and get them. We’ve seen marriages restored. Men learn how to treat their wives.”

The group’s focus is prayer and the Bible, but the gathering is not a church, and there is no strict order of worship: Basically, men share prayer requests, which are written down, and then other men pray and speak over those requests.

Sometimes somebody will sing spontaneously.

What is said in the group stays there, and nobody is shamed or condemned. That’s one of the biggest reasons men keep coming, John says.

Every week, the meeting ends with the Lord’s supper.

Seeing the value

Local entrepreneur Mack Robinson was losing sleep over an empty office building when the group founders convinced him to visit the group two years ago. Mack’s building had no tenant and an $18,000 annual property tax.

“When I got into the prayer group and realized that God was going to send a tenant in His own timetable, then I was able to relax and put it into His hands, even though I had held the building for about five years.”

A church occupied the building not long after.

Retiree Terry Williams of Ridgeland hesitantly attended his first meeting eight years ago at the behest of friends. Now it’s one of the highlights of his week.

Two years ago, Terry suggested to his wife that they start praying together every night. “And it’s brought us so much closer,” he says. “If I hadn’t been going to this group, that never would’ve been a suggestion of mine.”

Roddric Bell, who lives in Madison and is a regional director for the U.S. Department of Agriculture, is younger than most of the men in the group. “As a young Christian, we try to

find groups that are likeminded, and try to walk the walk we’re supposed to walk,” he says.

“God was prompting me to participate more in group prayer, because there’s more power in groups, people who are seeking the same thing. … once you get there and prayer is over, the burden is lifted somewhat.”

Pastor Edward Taylor, of Word of Faith Christian Center in Yazoo City, said the following when asked about the difference the group has made in his life:

“I think it’s the value. I see myself as being valuable now. I have already seen that as a pastor, but just to be able to do our part.”

Recently, Pastor Taylor has become one of the ministers whom group leaders ask on a Tuesday night: “Do you have a word for us?”

“Now it’s my turn to go there and be of encouragement to the men. I see why God wanted me to continue to go,” he says.

“(Men) keep coming because it’s a place where they can be real and genuine and share their heart and nobody’s going to make fun of them. Oh, I love that. We don’t make fun of anybody.”

The group contains countless other stories, from organ transplants to the breaking of spiritual bondage. John wants word to spread; he wants the group to have a website and reach more young people. But ultimately, the focus remains the same.

“Jesus said, ‘If I be lifted up, I’ll draw all men to Myself,’” John says. “If we lift Him up, He draws them in.” Y

Men of varying races and backgrounds put their hands together for this photo, taken at one of the prayer gatherings.

Men pray at a Tuesday night prayer gathering at Mama Hamil’s in Madison.

How my daughter’s illness brought me closer to Christ

My God story begins in my early childhood. I was raised by my grandmother, where going to church was a rule to live by. I was baptized during a revival in 1985 at age 12. I accepted Jesus as my Lord and Savior and had a fear of God, but it was not the fear that leads to living for Him; it was fear of His punishment.

At 20 years old I had my first child, Skyler. Later, I found out I was pregnant with my second child in June 1996. This pregnancy led to marriage. I felt like, this is it: God is real, God does love me, and He is a God of second chances. Then I had early contractions at 25 weeks. Our daughter Summer was born weighing 1 pound 8 ounces.

To see her underdeveloped body lying on a small makeshift bed, wrapped in Saran wrap under a light because she was too small for an incubator, gave new meaning to Jeremiah 1:5, “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you.”

I realized the doctors and nurses were caring for Summer as if she was still in my womb. This was nothing shy of a miracle. The doctors and nurses said she was a fighter but gave her only a 10 percent chance of survival.

Summer was released in March weighing 4 pounds, still underdeveloped and with a long journey ahead. She was released with equipment to monitor her, which required my direct attention. I also had a 2-year-old daughter to care for. This was where I had to lean on Jesus.

During a home health visit, a nurse noticed significant growth in Summer’s head measurements. She was rushed in for emergency surgery; she had hydrocephalus.

Summer’s hydrocephalus opened the door to my journey with Christ. One surgery led to another and another. I began to pray more and read the Bible more. I attended church and rededicated my life to Christ. This did not solve my problems but gave me strength to face them.

Then seizures and one thing after another began to take place. At one point Summer was on a ventilator. I gave up hope. I cried out to God to just take her. Somewhere along the way, I realized He was willing to love me and meet me where I was; that He was forgiving and full

of grace. I wanted to know Him more. I decided to fight for Summer through daily time in prayer.

Summer’s surgeries, infections and hospitalizations became the norm; family and friends became few. This is where God and I became friends. I have seen all the faces of God: Abba my Daddy; Jehovah Rapha, the God who heals; Jehovah Jireh, the God who provides; Jehovah Shalom, my Prince of Peace.

In the midst of all this, I was faced with divorce. I truly felt, this is now me and God.

When Summer was about 4, she was developing and getting a sense of normalcy. Then a shunt malfunction put her back in the hospital, and the surgery left her paralyzed and unable to speak.

I vowed to never pray again. Then a lady looked me in the eye and said, “You can’t bargain with God. God wants you and your heart freely.” I began praying again, and I dug deeper in the scriptures to understand sacrifice.

The doctor suggested inpatient therapy, requiring me to be there with Summer. I quit my job and moved in with my mom — not forgetting I had Skyler, who needed to attend school. I dedicated one year to help Summer learn to walk and talk again.

During this time, I began to see individuals and families in worse conditions than ours. I began to have compassion and love people from a genuine space. I took this attitude outside the hospital. This was the greatest opportunity for God to use me.

God led me to begin writing daily devotionals to encourage others, and He prompted me to be the light wherever I go. I took that as my ministry, birthing my #ChallengeYourFlesh Facebook page. I have been encouraging others through God’s Word since about 2006.

Summer has against all odds attended postsecondary school at the University of South Alabama and completed the PASSAGE USA certificate program. I’m so grateful for the journey God has walked me through. He was with me in every valley and on the mountaintop. In every season, He’s been refining me into who I am today. Y

Kim Carter is a follower of Jesus Christ, a mom, an advocate for vulnerable adults, and the founder of ChallengeYourFlesh devotionals. Deepy committed to ministry, she enjoys encouraging others in the race of life through the Word of God, including daily devotionals and monthly pop-up Bible studies in local coffee shops. She also serves in hospitality ministry at Word Alive Church and Communion House.

“

I found out I was pregnant with my second child in June 1996. This pregnancy led to marriage. I felt like, this is it: God is real, God does love me, and He is a God of second chances. Then I had early contractions at 25 weeks.”

Kim Carter (center) with her daughters Summer (left) and Skyler (right).

If you aren’t sure whether you have a relationship with God or where you’ll go when you die, please don’t put this magazine down until you’ve read the following:

✝ THE PROBLEM

For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God. – Romans 3:23

For the wages of sin is death … – Romans 6:23a

The natural result and consequence of our sin is eternal death, or hell (Revelation 20:15), separated from God. This is because God is completely perfect and holy (Matthew 5:48), and His justice demands that sin be punished (Proverbs 11:21).

✝ THE SOLUTION

… but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord. – Romans 6:23b But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. – Romans 5:8

Jesus Christ died in our place on the cross and took on the punishment for all our sins (Isaiah 53:4-6). Then God raised Him from the dead (John 20)!

✝ HOW TO RECEIVE SALVATION

If you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead, you will be saved. – Romans 10:9

Trust in what Jesus has done for you — His death for your sins and His resurrection — and trust Him as Lord.

✝ IS IT FOR ANYONE?

For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved. – Romans 10:13

✝ THE RESULTS

Therefore being justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. – Romans 5:1

For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. – Romans 8:38-39

✝ WHAT TO DO NEXT

So then faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by the word of God. – Romans 10:17

If you decided to trust in Jesus, grow in your faith by reading more of God’s Word in the Bible. We recommend the gospel of John (it comes just after Luke) as a good starting point — or Romans!

Finding a church close to you that teaches faith in Christ is another important step. It’s crucial to spend time with other believers so we can encourage each other in our faith.

If you have questions about anything on this page, please contact us at 601.896.1432, or send us a message on Facebook @MSChristianLiving, Instagram @mschristianmag or Twitter @MSChristLiving.

MCL’s Christian Leaders of the Year

For the fourth year in a row, MCL has taken nominations for Christian Leaders of the Year. This year the five selected leaders met together for a group interview at First Baptist Jackson with MCL Editor Katie Eubanks. The conversation was as impactful as anything you’d hear at a leadership conference! The following is a brief introduction of each Christian Leader of the Year, followed by an excerpt from the group interview, edited for space and clarity. (Listen to the full conversation on the MCL podcast, “A Closer Walk,” available on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Just search “Mississippi Christian Living.”)

COVER STORY by KATIE EUBANKS; photos by STEGALL IMAGERY

From left: Tom Washburn, minister to senior adults at First Baptist Jackson; Matt Nalker, executive director of The Arc Mississippi; Jonathan Lancaster, CFO of We Will Go; Preston Crowe, counseling pastor and director of The Center for Hope and Healing at Broadmoor Baptist Church; and Angela Carson, founder of the Pine Grove Association and Carson Consulting Services.

PART 1: THE LEADERS

ANGELA CARSON

● Founder and executive director of the Canton-based Pine Grove Association, which serves youth, the elderly, the Hispanic community and others.

● Founder and president, Carson Consulting Services, which offers training, consulting and coaching for nonprofits, small businesses and government entities.

● Member, secretary and Sunday school teacher at Priestley Chapel Missionary Baptist Church, Canton.

From her nomination:

“Angela displays love and concern for those in need at all times, but especially when a person needs encouragement, when their spirits are low, and circumstances are difficult. In other words, her leadership enables her to jump aboard the ship with those experiencing hard times and help them ‘ride out the storm.’”

- Verna M. Myers, friend and colleague

JONATHAN LANCASTER

● CFO of We Will Go, a downtown Jackson ministry that engages the community with the love of Christ through education programming, a food pantry and more.

● Member of Redeemer Church, PCA, Jackson.

● Married to Frances, father of Charlie.

From his nomination: “(Jonathan’s) call to action in great crisis (during COVID-19) resulted in tremendous program growth, not loss. We were able to serve more families and students than we’d ever thought was possible.”

- Mariah Pitre, director of education, We Will Go

From another co-worker: “It was very overwhelming for me (when I first started working at We Will Go). Everyone sees you, but do they really see you? And Jonathan, even without saying it, reassured me of that.”

- Ashten Jones, director of engagement, We Will Go

MATT NALKER

● Executive director of The Arc Mississippi, which primarily serves people with intellectual and developmental disabilities but also people who have serious mental illness or who need substance abuse treatment.

● Member of Immaculate Conception Catholic Church, Raymond.

● Married to Lacey, father of Brooke, Logan, Courtney, Lili, Greta and Gage.

From his nomination:

“You will find (Matt) learning about someone’s needs every day in whatever setting they may be in, such as jail, institutions, nursing homes, crisis centers, hospitals, or under a bridge. … he is the personal medical care decider for over 200 mental health persons.

“Matt got a call one day (about) a man experiencing a mental health crisis and who was about to be homeless. As he investigated the options, he learned that many people were falling through cracks in our state’s systems. … Using one man as example, Matt advocated for a ‘buck stops here’ resource that can address crisis in its many forms that is not exclusive to one system or diagnosis. SPOTT was formed. It is now eight years later …. Hundreds of people are helped through this process each year.”

- Dan Hall, friend and colleague

How

Matt got involved in The Arc:

“Our oldest child was born with a profound intellectual disability. So I’m a horticulture major that got involved with human service trying to help find services for my daughter and along the way realized it was a much bigger need out there in the world.”

PRESTON CROWE

● Counseling pastor and director of The Center for Hope and Healing, Broadmoor Baptist Church, Madison.

● President, Global Concern Inc. (GCI), a Mississippi nonprofit that shares the gospel and facilitates sustainable community development in northern Kenya.

● Married to Jennifer, father to Mason, Dawson, Colton, Ashlyn and Bella.

From his nomination:

“With Preston as its president, GCI has now finished two wells with clean water (in) northern Kenya. They are currently working on

piping the clean water closer to the village of Kargi ... Preston meets with the elders on a regular basis and is a strong godly presence in the lives of so many people there. Northern Kenya is truly the ends of the earth and Preston’s leadership to not only the Kenyans, but to those of us that go help serve … is a huge asset.”

- Tracy Ashworth, friend and life group member

TOM WASHBURN

● Minister to senior adults, First Baptist Jackson.

● Married to Dr. Gina Heath.

From his nomination: “Because FBJ does not have regularly scheduled Sunday evening services, which most of us have attended all our lives, Tom and Eva Hart began ‘Classic Sunday Nights,’ which meets in the chapel at 6 on Sunday evenings during summer months especially.” If we had to put somebody out of college, he was already in his mind making the plan for them to come back.

- Martha Stockstill, church member and former co-worker

PART 2: THE CONVERSATION

Katie Eubanks: I’d love to hear what Christian leaders have influenced each of you.

Angela Carson: My mom, just in (my) growing up. In those morning routines, she would have gospel music playing. Her words of encouragement … She’s a retired social worker. She was quiet in nature. She would just be that calm. (She modeled) time with God.

Also my pastor, Rev. Robert McCallum. … He’s my boss but also my pastor. He models treating those who have not treated you as they should. I’ve (also learned from him), ‘Every excuse is a good excuse … but what is it that God wants you to be doing?’

WHERE HOPE GROWS

Congratulations Dr. Preston Crowe!

Preston Crowe is the Counseling Pastor and Director for The Center for Hope and Healing at Broadmoor in Madison, MS. CHH’s mission is to join Christ in His work by bringing the truths of God’s word to bear on current and past situations offering good news, insight, and freedom. Learn about Preston and The Center for Hope and Healing online at chh.ms.

1531 Highland Colony Parkway | Madison MS 39110 Broadmoor.org | 601.898.2345

Congratulations Angela Carson May God Continue to Bless You!

Pastor

“My kids, they inspire me,” Matt says. “The older girls that are in college now will come home late at night and say, ‘Did I miss prayer?’”

Matt Nalker: I would say the parishioners of my church. I’m an Army brat … and we finally settled in Raymond (and attended Immaculate Conception). I still go to church with (those same people) now.

Now I’ve realized, ‘Gosh I’m that old guy that encourages that young couple who comes into the church. … Wow, that’s your role.’

Preston Crowe: I learned a lot from my dad in terms of what it means to be a Christian leader in a business setting. He worked at the same company for over 50 years and taught me a lot about hard work and sticking with something over the long run.

I had back-to-back youth ministers who really impacted me. We lived an hour from New Orleans, so we had seminary students (as youth pastors). Aaron Johnson was ex-military, ex-Green Beret. He was the first one who called something out in me in terms of leadership and believing in me. Gary Cornelius also invested tons in me … I remember Gary calling me one time (and asking), ‘Can you lead tonight?’ I was in maybe ninth grade, 10th grade.

The next one would be my wife’s dad. He was a preacher, and people called him Preacher. He probably taught me more of the grit of ministry.

Tom Washburn: My parents. I don’t know that there’s ever been a day they didn’t pray for me. They are 90 and 91 years old, and every morning they pray, and every night before they go to bed, they sit in these chairs right next to each other and hold hands and pray.

Frank Pollard was pastor here for 25 years. I don’t know that I’ve ever known anybody who loved the Lord and knew how to communicate it as well as he did.

And Dr. (Van “Doc”) Quick. Dr. Quick was my boss at (Mississippi College). For him, student discipline was always redemptive. If we had to put somebody out of college, he was already in his mind making the plan for them to come back.

Jonathan Lancaster: Martin Luther said the job of a Christian cobbler wasn’t to put crosses on all the shoes, but to make the best shoe. Before I was in the role that I’m in now, I worked at United Way of Atlanta, and my boss there, Claire Burke, just really exemplified that and showed me you could have a high standard for work within the space of helping people.

And I would say my dad was the second person. He really challenged me to go for something. It was kind of a leap to come into this role, so he challenged me (to) do it while you can. … It took him till he was in his 40s to go into ministry.

“I have had people accuse me of being patient. I am not. I got trained somewhere along the way,” says Preston (far left).

MN: You said something (Jonathan) that reminded me that as we get older … My kids, they inspire me. My older kids — we’ve always prayed before we went to bed every night. And the older girls that are in college now will come home late at night and say, ‘Did I miss prayer?’

TW: And you know something, Matt, that you said awhile ago about the people in your church. Golly, how the people at First Baptist Church Jackson have inspired me! I’ve worked mostly with senior adults here. And oh my goodness. They keep it real.

PC: They’re prayer warriors, too. I was thinking of Ms. Triplett earlier today, because I interned here at First Baptist for a couple years in college. And I remember her just praying for so many people, and she would catch me in the hallway and say, ‘I prayed for you today,’ and she meant it.

MN: You’re exactly right. In the world of work that we all do on some level, working with folks that are truly in crisis, and you don’t have words, you pray to God that you have words of healing or words of inspiration for folks. But ultimately it comes down to, brother, sister, let’s just pray for a minute that God will intervene — because we don’t have the words to ‘fix’ a situation.

KE: What’s the biggest lesson God has taught each of you about Christian leadership?

MN: Listen more and talk less. My old Army sergeant dad told me when I was 2: ‘You’ve got two ears and one mouth, son.’

TW: The word ‘leadership’ scares me to death. So many people get messed up thinking they’re a leader. … We need to be pointing at the One to follow. You’re going to be really disappointed if you follow me. Follow Jesus.

AC: I’m learning it’s not about me. My pastor has helped me see that. … We signed on to be Christians.

There’ve been times I’ve been called to go and do, and I didn’t want to do it. He’s going to call us sometimes when it’s not convenient. Will we answer the call?

PC: (For me it would be) patience. I have had people accuse me of being patient. I am not. I got trained somewhere along the way.

Congratulations, Matt!

Join Our Fight for Equal Rights for All

Our MISSION

Promote and protect the human rights of people with intellectual and developmental disabilities and actively support their full inclusion and participation in the community throughout their lifetimes.

Our IMPACT

With your help, we are working every day to build a future of inclusive work, play, worship, community, travel, and more. But we can’t do it alone! We need the help of people with I/DD, their families, and allies of the cause.

Visit arcms.org today to help make a difference in the lives of people with disabilities.

704 North President Street • Jackson, MS 39202

Phone: 601.355.0220

COAST OFFICE

3109 Gulf Avenue • Gulfport, MS 39501

Phone: 228.497.1035

arcms.org

I’ve realized, especially through counseling — maybe they have a quick decision to make, and they just need some help with it, but others may have a burden they’ve been carrying for years. I have to be patient to see God work.

We’ve seen that a lot in Africa (through Global Concern) too.

TW: Don’t you find that the change that comes slowly lasts longer?

PC: That is always the case, yes.

JL: Something I say to my team all the time is, we need a higher tolerance for failure. … We don’t try because we’re afraid to fail.

MN: And gosh, what you learn by failing.

PC: I have a handwritten note that I took during some type of a leadership summit I think, and I look at it often: If you wait until you’re 100 percent sure, you’ll always be too late.

KE: This question is for all of you, too: What is your favorite part of your job?

MN: It has to be the next person I get to meet. … They inspire me, they teach me, they make me want to come to work.

JL: I’m a numbers, structures kind of guy … In order to (provide food) for 15,000 people, we’ve got to figure out how to get a truck to get food and coordinate all these things. So I’m always analyzing, how is our thing running? But the exciting thing on the other side of that is the people. So that’s the drive.

“I’m always analyzing, how is our thing running? But the exciting thing on the other side of that is the people (we serve). So that’s the drive,” says Jonathan (center).

I want to raise as much money as I can, I want to be efficient, but the outcome is I want to help as many people as possible.

PC: The first thing that came to mind was the joy of being part of people’s lives who are opening up about things they’ve never shared before. ... The courage I see for them to take that first step.

AC: I would say the flexibility to be able to meet new people, work with new children and learn from them. … And variety. Every day is different, my audience may be different, but I still see and have found

HOW WE HELP

We guide youth and adults towards a healthy lifestyle, good character, compassion, and belonging.

HOW YOU CAN HELP

The community depends on us and we depend on the community to give us the support we always need.

601.955.1132 pinegroveassoc.org

SUNDAYS

Sunday School • 9:00 am Worship • 10:30 am Visit fbcj.org/groups to learn more about groups and how you can get connected.

that there’s an angle of ministry in it. Even with the business. You know, I was criticized early on, ‘You’re not charging for (some of) your services (right now).’ Well, I know but, they need help, right?

Ministry, I just can kind of look back and just see that it’s shown up throughout the journey. And ministry can be fun. It’s not all just the mundane, hard stuff.

TW: I do 40, 50 funerals a year. Even in those hard times, to see people going through the hardest thing in the world, they find fun things to laugh about.

KE: How would y’all encourage somebody who’s wrestling with their calling or self-doubt as a leader?

JL: There’s this big narrative in our culture (that) you’ve got to do this big thing. … I love this other quote, it’s some proverb: When I was young, I set out to change the world … then I got old and realized I should’ve started with myself.

MN: A lot of the people we help, fight us (because they’ve) always been helped. I think for me, I don’t like somebody to help me, because I’ve got a so-called plan. And I’ve realized as I get older and more experienced, that it’s OK to listen to what you say, and part of your plan can be my plan. I don’t have to know everything.

Open up to (receiving) help.

AC: I share this with women at the church: Just try it. Just help somebody. The more you do it, the easier it becomes, and there’s so many rewards in knowing you helped somebody.

PC: If I could speak to a younger version of me, I would say, your calling is to follow the Lord. How that looks might change. … I felt called to ministry before I really knew what that looked like. That was frustrating at first, but now I realize it’s allowed me to make some transitions.

Let God show you how to lead.

TW: And then be so, so careful not to think leadership is more important than loving. Y

“We need a higher tolerance for failure,” Jonathan says. “We don’t try because we’re afraid to fail.”

Aaron and Lizzy Sibley

Loss,

lament,

and moving forward

No matter what you’ve experienced, nothing can prepare you for the loss of a child. “I had never had a lot of bad things happen in my life at all (before we lost our son),” says Lizzy Sibley, a senior auditor at Rabobank who’s married to Aaron, student minister at First Baptist Brandon.

Lizzy and Aaron wed after graduating from Mississippi State, had daughter Ava Grace a year later, then had twins Addie and Aaron Jr. (aka Chipper, as in “chip off the old block”) two years after that. Life was good. The Sibleys were scared when they found out they were having twins — even one child is hard! — but God provided, Aaron says.

Then in May 2021, Chipper drowned in a swimming pool. He was 4 years old.

Last Christmas was terrible, and Lizzy assumed all future Christmases would be the same. But slowly, she and Aaron have gotten help through prayer, counseling, and the company of fellow believers who didn’t ply them with platitudes like “Everything happens for a reason.” As true as that is, it’s rarely helpful in the immediate aftermath of tragedy.

By the grace of God, “I’m actually excited about Christmas this year,” Lizzy says.

The Sibleys have done a lot of healing in the past year and a half. But they had to do a lot of lamenting first.

The life and loudness

The Sibleys were living in Yazoo City when Addie and Chipper were born in December 2016.

“You never think you’re ever going to have twins. It was so bizarre,” Aaron says.

“I was shocked, but right after the shock, I was really excited,” Lizzy says.

The twins made it to 38 weeks, full term, and had zero complications, which “was kind of a fear,” Lizzy says, “especially with a twin pregnancy.”

“From that point forward, being a twin parent became part of who I was,” Aaron says, and Lizzy agrees: She identified as a twin mom.

“Ava Grace was 100 percent the leader. I don’t know if that’s just big sister or her personality,” Aaron says. “Then right on her heels was Chipper. Addie would sit back, like, ‘Oooh, y’all are going to get in so much trouble!’

“Chipper was the life and loudness of our home. Every picture or video of him, he’s making faces, dancing and singing, playing with dinosaurs … ”

The family moved to Vancleave, Mississippi, in 2019. The next two years were a sweet time: “I got closer to my kids,” Aaron says, including during the COVID-19 pandemic, despite the obstacles he faced as a student pastor. He’d pick up the twins every Friday at lunch and take them to a park of their choice to play.

“We’d make a day of it,” he says. “That’s changed how I view my time now.”

Love in the wake of tragedy

On May 23, 2021, Aaron was driving home from a Disciple Now weekend where he had preached. Lizzy and the kids had gone to Arlington, Tennessee, for a cousin’s birthday party.

“Anytime they were gone, I worried,” he says.

From left: Lizzy, Ava Grace, Addie and, Aaron Sibley. The girls are holding a picture of their brother Aaron Sibley Jr., aka Chipper, who drowned at a birthday party on May 23, 2021.

“I was driving home and was on our road, and Lizzy called me.”

“Frantic,” Lizzy recalls. She told him what had happened. Their little boy had died.

Immediately, Satan started throwing accusations at both parents: Aaron should’ve gone to Arlington instead of the DNow. Lizzy should’ve watched more closely.

“I was in such shock that it even happened on my watch. I felt a lot of extreme guilt. I had to receive a lot of counseling for that,” Lizzy says.

“Other parents who have children die in tragic ways feel the same. It’s only natural, because you’re their protector.”

After hearing the news, Aaron drove up to Arlington — but not by himself.

“My boss, Terry, was so good to us. He and his wife came to our house. He prayed with me, and he hugged me like a daddy hugs his son,” Aaron says. “And he wouldn’t let me drive up alone.”

From that moment on, church members joined relatives in rallying around the Sibley family.

“I can’t imagine going through that without those people,” Lizzy says. “Many people came and did yardwork, did our laundry, put goodie bags out, organized things like our pantry … we had my niece and her fiancé go down to Vancleave … I couldn’t go back to (Chipper’s) room … I asked her to put things away till I had time to deal with it.

“Nobody tried to make things OK. They just loved us. They were a model of how the church loves people through tragedy. They loved us the way Christ loves us.”

“Obviously God knew what we were going to walk through,” Aaron says. “And that’s why we were there (with those people).”

Learning to lament

Everybody grieves differently, and some folks delay it.

“Early on, I don’t know that I did an excellent job dealing with my grief,” Aaron says. “I cried the first week, then I flipped a switch. I felt called to preach my son’s funeral. I honestly don’t know how. I’ve never watched it.

Aaron and Lizzy got married eight months after graduating from Mississippi State University.

The many sweet faces of Chipper.

“Then I did another funeral, a wedding, a camp … I didn’t give myself time to grieve. I was telling people God is still good. I think I believed all those things, but I didn’t meditate on it the way I should have.”

By the end of July, “Lizzy and the girls had done a much better job with their grief than I had (with mine).”

Meanwhile, “I actually grieved,” Lizzy says. “I spent a lot of time crying.”

Finally, Aaron sat down and talked with his supervisor and his pastor, who sent him home that very day and connected him with a counselor.

“(Counseling) was one of the key things I did,” Aaron says. “I went for a couple weeks, and then Lizzy started coming with me. He taught us about lament. I think the church as a whole doesn’t always teach that.

“He taught us what lament is, the purpose behind it, and he made us do it.” (“We didn’t want to,” Lizzy adds.)

In essence, to lament as a believer is to go to the Lord “and tell Him boldly what you’re upset about. And maybe you’re upset with Him,” Aaron says, adding that he and Lizzy both were upset with God over Chipper’s death.

“Then you also come back and know the truths of who (God) is. Scripture says He’s good. And you tell Him those truths as well. And you always end with praising Him and submitting to His will,” Aaron says.

“It changed the way I led my family.”

Aaron, Lizzy and their families all grew through that process of lament, and Aaron has pointed others to it as well.

“Over the next few months, I had students go through difficult things, and I would show them this worksheet about lamenting.”

Finding comfort

Early in their grief, the Sibleys kept asking God how He would use Chipper’s death for His glory.

“After reality set in, that (line of thinking) just made us mad,” Lizzy says. “Now I think we’re at a place where we can think like that (again, though) I would gladly take his place.”

Lizzy and Aaron are grateful for their families and the people of First Baptist Church Vancleave, where Aaron was working when Chipper died, for loving them through their loss.

Lizzy and Aaron with (from left) Chipper, Ava Grace and Addie, celebrating Lizzy’s birthday in January 2021.

Addie and Ava Grace hold a blue balloon in honor of their brother.

Aaron agrees: He’s glad he and Lizzy’s story has impacted others, but “I’d really rather have my son right now.”

“My biggest comfort is knowing that God is all-knowing and totally in control of all things, and that little man’s days were numbered to 4 years, 5 months and 17 days. There is a reason for that, and it’s bigger than anything I can conjure up,” Lizzy says.

“I have to hinge myself on that, or my faith would be swept out from underneath me. I don’t know best, but I know He does. I’m a mere person. He’s the One who works everything according to His purpose.”

Her other comforts are knowing that she herself has a purpose — “We all have a purpose as believers, and it keeps you going” — and that she’ll see her little boy again one day.

“While I do not like waiting … it’s not like he’s gone forever.”

Aaron has similar thoughts as he mourns things he won’t experience with Chipper on this side of eternity, such as “baseball, football, hunting, teaching him to tie a tie, teaching him how to shave …

“I also know heaven is unimaginable,” he says. “I wonder what kind of things I’ll get to do with my son there. He won’t ‘need’ us like he did here on earth (but) we know deep down the relationship will be perfect — whatever it may look like.”

Meanwhile, 8-year-old Ava Grace recently accepted Christ, and her new faith has given her even more certainty about her little brother. “(She says) ‘Yes, I will see him again,’” Lizzy says.

Chipper’s twin sister, Addie, “kind of adopted some of his mannerisms and personality (after he passed),” Aaron says.

“She’s come out of her shell,” Lizzy says. “He spoke for her a lot of times.”

“Yeah he did, didn’t he?” Aaron says.

One of the hardest things for Lizzy after Chipper’s death was “coming home without him and (his) big, loud presence,” she says. “But I’m telling you, it’s not quiet now. (When the girls) come home now, it’s a stampede again.”

Leaning on the Lord

This spring, the Sibleys announced they were moving to Brandon, where Aaron serves as student minister at First Baptist Church.

“We just longed to be (closer to) our families,” Aaron says. “Then when (First Baptist) Brandon called, a friend of mine said, ‘Do you think with your longing for your family, maybe God would move you?’”

After praying and seeking wise counsel, Aaron and Lizzy decided to move. “It’s been really good. It’s been a blessing,” Lizzy says.

“It takes a special church and special people to love a family who’s gone through this stuff,” Aaron says. “God has given us good churches.”

Lizzy recently spoke at a small women’s group at FBC Brandon called “Worship in the Waiting,” which ministers to women dealing with infertility, miscarriage and child loss.

Up until very recently, “it was too fresh” to talk about, she says. Even now, she and Aaron aren’t seeking out opportunities to share their story (they did not seek out this article). But they’re open to those opportunities when they arise.

“If (people) could see how we persevered and lamented,” Lizzy says, “could my story keep someone from turning from God?

“I don’t give credit to ourselves at all. … I think He was the one keeping us out of the pit.”

She and Aaron still wrestle with Chipper’s death every day. And like any other humans, “Our first inclinations are almost always to lean on ourselves, or even on other people,” Aaron says. But they have learned to do differently.

“Our first lean should be on the Lord.” Y

MCL’s 2022 Women’s Retreat The best one yet!

In the middle of the COVID-19 pandemic in 2020, we held our first annual Women’s Retreat, where we discussed mental health (something everyone needed help with that year). In 2021, more women attended as COVID restrictions loosened, and we learned about hearing from God. This year, we’ve received the best and most engaged feedback from any of our three retreats.

The 2022 MCL Women’s Retreat was held October 29 at Broadmoor Baptist Church in Madison, with the theme “Sharing Your God Story.” Several women did just that, including Shay Greenwood, who spoke about overcoming obstacles to realize her dreams for her family; Jessica Warren, whose bitter disappointments led her to a deeper understanding of the Father’s love; and three panelists, who discussed ways we can each share our own God stories.

They say people make plans and God laughs, but God was gracious as He sent Allie Murphy to lead worship after singer/songwriter Andi Cotten came down with the flu. Kelly Morgan, who served on our panel last year, emceed the event, and of course we had a delicious lunch — plus yummy cupcakes and small group discussions in the afternoon.

We could not have made this year’s Women’s Retreat our best so far without our sponsors! Our 2022 sponsors were:

Impact Sponsor: Business Communications, Inc. (BCI)

Community Sponsor: Wendy Maxwell, Counselor

Community Sponsor: Pam Anderson, Cruise Planners

Faithful Friends: Musee Bath

Finally, at this year’s Women’s Retreat, Katie announced the first ever MCL Writing Retreat, which will take place Saturday, April 1, at Roosevelt State Park in Morton, Mississippi. If you want more details, please email katie@mschristianliving.com. Y

PARTNERS IN HOPE

St. Dominic’s ministry helps families in need

Partners in Hope, a ministry of St. Dominic’s Hospital in Jackson, has been around since the 1980s, collaborating with St. Dominic’s employees and local organizations to provide gifts and necessities for needy families in the community. Aimee Burrow, manager of volunteer services at St. Dominic’s, and Sister Kelly Boline, a Dominican sister and chaplain in pastoral care at the hospital, recently spoke with MCL contributing writer Anna Claire O’Cain about how faith and teamwork are making a difference in the lives of families.

Anna Claire O’Cain: Can you give me an overview of what Partners in Hope is?

Aimee Burrow: Sister Josephine Therese was actually the president of the hospital. (She) started the program to reach out to some of our patients that were in great need at Christmas time. … It was called Baskets of Hope and it was just a basket with food items and gift items.

At our highest point of participants, we had 70 families … most of them all referred by (St Dominic’s) employees. (When) COVID hit, we had no volunteers here to help us. We were not allowed to have visitors, so families couldn’t come pick things up. We broadened our outreach (and) we changed the name of the program to Partners in Hope. We partnered with the United Way and various shelters in the community, and we collected just as many donations, but we did more of a blanket approach where we supplied items for the shelters ... We’ve done that for the last three years.

This year we are doing more of a hybrid approach of continuing to support shelters but also including some individual families ... Our event will happen December 9 and it is supported by the team members of the hospital, who provide all the donations.

AO: Tell me about the Partners in Hope event.

AB: Because of the confidentiality of the patient, we don’t have a reception-type event. … Also the confidentiality of the fact that they are actually in need. … We literally are meeting them at our loading dock and loading their car up. It is an amazing event. Volunteers help us do this. When you see a car drive away with bicycle handles hanging out the window and boxes up to the brim … It is truly a gift of the season.

AO: What organizations will you partner with this year?

AB: We are really focusing on Stewpot this year because they reached out to us as an organization and they have great need this

year. (Also) Catholic Charities (and) St. Dominic’s Community Health Clinic. The clinic is run by St. Dominic’s Hospital (and) it is next to Stewpot. It is a totally free clinic. It’s been in existence (since) one of our sisters started (the clinic). They provide medical care to the indigent.

(Also) The Refill Jackson Initiative. (They) help (young adults) get back on their feet and find work. We actually hire people from Refill Initiative. Then we are also (partnering with) St. Dominic’s care management closet. One of the things we do every year is when patients come to our hospital — we have quite a few homeless, you know — we try to let them leave with clothing. … And we will also be supporting Hinds Behavioral Health with some gift cards.

AO: How does teamwork play a part in Partners in Hope?

Sister Kelly Boline: Something our team members do so well day in and day out is they collaborate. Whether it’s the nurses and the CNAs (certified nursing assistants) and the housekeepers on a particular floor in the hospital together, whether it’s colleagues out in one of our clinics ... When they gather around Partners in Hope, it’s a common purpose.

No matter how you engage here at St. Dominic’s — no matter what kind of team member you are — you can find a role in Partners in Hope.

AO: How does faith play a role in this project?

KB: There’s a scripture that comes to my mind … ‘Lord, when did we see You hungry, when did we see You naked?’ (Matthew 25:44) Because Christ talked about feeding the hungry, clothing the naked, visiting the sick. So this is a very tangible way to do what Christ is calling us to do. Y

For more information about Partners in Hope, contact Aimee Burrow at 601.200.6739 or visit stdom.com.

Anna Claire O’Cain is a former English teacher and current grad student in the clinical mental health counseling program at Liberty University. She is married to her best friend, J.T., a teacher and youth pastor. Most of all, she is a believer who is passionate about serving God through missions and worship. Through MCL, she now uses her love for writing to serve the Lord in a new way.

’Tis the season to check on senior loved ones

As we celebrate the season with loved ones and friends, spending time together gives us the opportunity not only to catch up with each other but also to check on older family members whom we don’t see every day.

It’s natural for seniors to exhibit physical and cognitive changes as they age. But do you find that your older loved ones are more anxious than usual? Maybe they’re forgetting things like names and important dates or are easily confused. Do they seem overwhelmed or lonely? Are they keeping up with their hygiene, or do they look unkempt? Do you notice they’re struggling physically — unstable on their feet, straining to climb stairs, or have lost or gained a significant amount of weight? Any of these could signal a need for a lifestyle change.

Thankfully, many senior living options exist for older Americans, including all-inclusive Life Plan Communities like St. Catherine’s Village in Madison. Those who enter a Life Plan Community have lifetime access to all levels of care as needed. For instance, an active adult can move into independent living at St. Catherine’s Village and leave major responsibilities such as home repairs and lawn maintenance behind. Then over time, if these individuals require additional assistance, they have a whole continuum of care available to them — from assisted living to memory care to skilled nursing.

Over the long term, a Life Plan Community provides an outstanding value by guaranteeing services at a predetermined rate throughout the resident’s retirement years. It also allows for a smooth transition as a person ages and the level of required care changes. At St. Catherine’s, for example, residents can move from a cozy studio apartment or spacious garden home to Marian Hall to Campbell Cove to Hughes Center, Tuscany or Siena Center … all within the comfort of a familiar setting.

St. Catherine’s was the first Life Plan Community in Mississippi to earn accreditation by CARF-CCAC. This “commitment to excellence” seal signifies that the campus exceeds the standards established by the

only international accrediting body for CCRCs (Continuing Care Retirement Communities).

With unparalleled services and a homelike environment, St. Catherine’s Village is Madison’s preeminent, all-inclusive Life Plan Community — providing seniors the right care at the right time. The gorgeous, gated property is located on 160 picturesque acres.

In the spirit of giving this season, St. Catherine’s is offering a holiday special for Campbell Cove Memory Care. Right now, new residents can lock in 2022 rates and save $3,000 if they move in before the end of the year. One thousand dollars will be discounted from their monthly service fee for the first three months of 2023.

Campbell Cove offers protected, comfortable ambiance and activityfocused care for individuals with Alzheimer’s disease and other forms of dementia. The secure building accommodates 36 residents in three color-coded wings, each with a common living room, dining area and 12 furnished private bedrooms. The residential wings join together in a large multipurpose area with an arts and crafts room, recreation center, country kitchen, and living room.

This thoughtful design minimizes obstacles and emphasizes wayfinding cues and circulation paths to guide people from one place to another. The small yet distinctive “neighborhoods” reinforce familiarity while common areas are available to support family-size gatherings. Outside are secure landscaped patios and a walking garden so residents and their families can enjoy time outdoors in a safeguarded setting. Campbell Cove is licensed as an Alzheimer’s Assisted Living community and has received “Exemplary” recognition for its person-centered programming. Y

For more details on the Campbell Cove holiday special or to learn about St. Catherine’s Village, visit StCatherinesVillage.com or call 601.856.0123 to schedule a tour.

Find peace of mind with exceptional memory care programs at St. Catherine’s Village, where a warm, calming and homelike environment welcomes individuals facing memory challenges at all levels. Right now, new residents can lock in 2022 rates and save $3,000* when they move into Campbell Cove.

(601) 856-0123 www.StCatherinesVillage.com

A ‘birthday’ that changed the world

It was a Saturday, and the relatives had been invited to celebrate my grandson Waylon’s second birthday. I stood outside the front door of his home and waited until he saw me. When he did, he ran to the door, opened it, and greeted me with “Nana! Nana!” while giving me hugs.

Balloons of various sizes, shapes and colors also greeted me. With a loud squeal and hands in the air, Waylon took off running — the balloons dispersed, and he chased them. He was one happy boy!

Have you ever thought about why we celebrate birthdays? When and how did birthday cakes, candles, cards and birthday parties evolve?

Are birthday parties in the Bible?

The word “birthday” is mentioned twice in scripture, first in Genesis 40. Some commentaries believe this birthday celebration was to honor Pharaoh (v. 20) as a god. The second reference is in Matthew 14:1-12, “when Herod’s birthday was celebrated … ” (v. 6).

At both of these “birthday parties,” men were killed. Could it be that these two celebrations demonstrate a selfish pagan mindset?

However, when it comes to the “birthday” of Jesus, there’s no mention of a date or a birthday party. If there are no birthday celebrations mentioned for the King of Kings, and we don’t know the exact day He was born, why do we celebrate His birthday on December 25?

History’s answers

In a John MacArthur sermon entitled “Jesus’ Birth in Bethlehem,” I learned that during the fourth century, the bishop of Rome selected December 25 as Christ’s birthdate — an arbitrary choice, but he had a purpose for doing it in December.

Waylon Leathers celebrates his second birthday (here and below).

His reasoning centered on an annual pagan festival that began before Christ. In the bleak winter, the people held a party anticipating spring — the sun’s return and the new growth of plants and trees. There were parties, gifts, feasting, and decorating their houses with evergreens.

By the fourth century, this festival was called Saturnalia for the god of agriculture, Saturn. The bishop wanted to bring a sanctifying influence into this pagan celebration. He hoped people’s attention would be drawn away from paganism and toward how and why Jesus came.

MacArthur states, “The heathen festivities never missed a beat. They kept on going at the same pace they were always going at. The church, which frowned on them and wanted to change them, finally accepted them and let them be assimilated into the celebration of Christmas so that today Christmas is a conglomeration of all that is distinctively Christian and biblical and all that is distinctively pagan.”

Celebrating Christ’s ‘birthday’

How can you and I make the birthday of Jesus the Messiah different from all the commercialism that Christmas has become?

When I lived in Germany, I loved how they distinguished between the visit of Saint Nicholas and the birth of Jesus. On Christmas Eve, our German neighbors would have a meal, light the candles on the tree, sing “O Tannen Baum,” and open a few presents.

The following day, church bells would ring throughout the community. People went to

church for worship. It was a way to focus attention on the Savior’s birth.

Today, Christ followers have found various ways to separate from the secularism surrounding Christmas. Some have a birthday cake for Jesus, sing “Happy Birthday” and read Luke 2. There might be a special present set aside for Jesus under the tree, or a donation to an organization, or the serving of a meal. What are some ways you celebrate the birth of Jesus?

How should we celebrate our birthdays?

The “birthday parties” mentioned in the Bible were pagan. So what should we as Christ followers do about our own birthdays?

Here are a few thoughts.

◆ Celebrating birthdays provides a time to reflect on the Giver of life. Celebrate the years He has given to you and His faithfulness through those years. Express your gratitude to God because He has created you. You are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139).

◆ Mark the milestones of your life. The essential ages for me are 12, 16, 21, 50 and 65; for the years that follow after, I want to be grateful, flourish, and finish well.

◆ Celebrate your spiritual birthday. Compose a letter of thankfulness to God and note your spiritual mile markers from the past year.

◆ When you send a birthday card to someone, make it personal by sharing a blessing, prayer or scripture.

Happy Birthday, King Jesus! We celebrate who You are, God’s one and only Son. We celebrate Your resurrection. And we look forward to the celebration to come — Your return. Y

Laura Lee Leathers loves to touch lives and encourage others through words and biblical hospitali-tea. She is an award-winning freelance writer, encouragement coach and speaker, and a contributing writer for several newspapers, magazines and online publications. Connect with her at LauraLeeLeathers.com or laura.l.leathers@gmail.com, or join her Facebook group, “Teacups, Mugs, and Friends.”

A TALE OF THE CHRIST

“Behold, a virgin shall conceive, and bear a son, and shall call his name Immanuel.” ISAIAH 7:14B

She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins.

~ MATTHEW 1:21, NIV

Therefore the Lord himself will give you a sign: behold, a virgin shall conceive, and bear a son, and shall call his name Immanuel.

~ ISAIAH 7:14, ASV

While they were there, the time came for the baby to be born, and she gave birth to her firstborn, a son. She wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger, because there was no guest room available for them.

~ LUKE 2:6-7, NIV

Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is the Messiah, the Lord.

~ LUKE 2:11, NIV

The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.

~ JOHN 1:14, NIV

Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.

~ JAMES 1:17, ESV

Glory to God in the highest heaven, and on earth peace to those on whom his favor rests.

~ LUKE 2:14, NIV

For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.

Of the greatness of his government and peace there will be no end.

He will reign on David’s throne and over his kingdom, establishing and upholding it with justice and righteousness from that time on and forever.

The zeal of the LORD Almighty will accomplish this.

~ ISAIAH 9:6-7, NIV

The people rejoiced at the willing response of their leaders, for they had given freely and wholeheartedly to the LORD. David the king also rejoiced greatly.

~ 1 CHRONICLES 29:9, NIV

Thanks be to God for His indescribable gift.

~ 2 CORINTHIANS 9:15, HCSB

For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.

~ JOHN 3:16, KJV

ADVERTISING PARTNERS PAGE

The Arc Mississippi 23

Belhaven University 2

Broadmoor Baptist Church 21

C Spire 3

Canton Christmas Festival 34

Capital Ortho 13

Council House Restaurant & Gift Shop 36

Fireplace Chimney Sweep Solutions 33

First Baptist Jackson 24

Gateway Rescue Mission 35

Global Concern Inc. 22

H.E.A.L. Mississippi ..................................................36

Holy Trinity Anglican Church 36

Jackson Leadership Foundation 24

Joe Ragland, author and attorney 33

LIFE of Mississippi 33

Mama Hamil's...............................................................15

Mascagni Wealth Management 40

Miskelly Furniture 5

Mission Mississippi 12

Mississippi Baptist Seminary & Bible College ............................................................36

The Orchard 15

Palmer Home for Children 21

Pine Grove Association 24

Pine Grove Treatment Center 7

Priestley Chapel Missionary Baptist Church 22

Pro-Life Mississippi 35

Ronald McDonald House

Charities Mississippi 37

Smiles by Design, Dr. Eugene C. Brown, Jr., D.D.S 11

Southern Farm Bureau Life Insurance Company 11

St. Catherine's Village 31

St. Dominic's 39

St. Dominic's Behavioral Health Services 37

Stegall Imagery 22

Sunnybrook Estates 8

We Will Go 33

Wesley Biblical Seminary 25

Half of your healthcare is in the stories you share with us. Because before you’re a patient, you’re a person – and what you’re thinking, feeling, and hoping for can help us to personalize your recovery and improve your outcome.

Let’s Talk...

Have you ever wondered if your investment strategy needs a second opinion? Maybe you have unanswered questions. Maybe you need advice on your retirement plan.

The team at Mascagni Wealth Management might be exactly what you are looking for. We are a Registered Investment Advisor with over 30 years of experience helping Mississippians and their families. Let’s sit down over a cup of coffee and talk about your financial future. Call us today.

205 E. Main Street • Clinton, MS

For an free initial consultation, please call 601-925-8099 or visit mascagniwealth.com

MASCAGNI