Mississippi Christian Living April 2020

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APRIL 2020

y p p a H ! r e t s Ea The Bates family

‘We are God’s adopted kids’

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contents APRIL 2020

®

Volume 14, Number 10 Publisher MS Christian Living, Inc. Editor Katie Eubanks katie@mschristianliving.com Associate Editor Suzanne Durfey

columns 8 As I See It COVID-19: Apocalypse, panic, or reset?

11 Mission Mississippi Moments Commit your work to the Lord, together!

12 Modern Motherhood The gift of time

14 Health & Wellness Helping the whole person in Haiti

17 This Is My Story KYLE HANCOCK

From prisoner to reformer

Levi Bates (front) with his family. From left: Cliff, Owen, Amy and Ellis. Amy and Cliff were “completely done” having kids before God called them to adopt Levi, they said.

cover story 18 ‘We’re God’s adopted kids’

30 Food for Thought Cooking and coping Laborchex — Mercy and truth in the workplace

32 Tough Questions with Barb I’m too frustrated with my child to enjoy parenting

33 Money Matters Are you financially literate?

in every issue

26 Devon and Jacqueline Loggins Loving kids at Methodist Children’s Homes

6 Editor’s Letter 34 Quips & Quotes 34 Advertiser Index

Coming Next Month Jill Ford, state legislator from Madison County, on her God story

➺

CONNECT WITH US: twitter.com/MSChristLiving facebook.com/MSChristianLiving 4

APRIL 2020 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living

Sales Suzanne Durfey, Ginger Gober, Megan Manuel Contributing Writers Felicia Bowens, Stan Buckley, Libbo Crosswhite, Dan Hall, Barbara Martin, Carolyn McLemore, Ricky Rayborn, Pauline Rogers, Kurt Vande Streek Cover Photography Stegall Imagery Distribution Assistants Avery Cahee, Kathryn Dyksterhouse, Randy Fortenberry, Walton Gresham, Rachel Schulte, Jerri Strickland, Bob Whatley

31 Christian Commerce

Amy and Cliff Bates on adoption, family and faith

feature

Art/Graphic Design Sandra Goff

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➺editor’s letter

Pray, keep your distance, and don’t panic

A

T PRESS TIME, Mississippi had reported

20 deaths and 900+ cases of the COVID19 coronavirus, and the global death toll had topped 40,000. This is cause for prayer, concern, and — for mercy’s sake, if you haven’t done this already — lifestyle change.

A lot of folks have to work outside the home, even during a pandemic, in order to get by. And God only knows where we’d be without our medical professionals right now.

But if that’s not you, and if you’re not practicing as much social distancing as possible, I hope this column will provide a loving, socially distant smack in your face.

COVID-19 is not the Black Plague. I personally do not feel threatened by it. But if we who are healthy don’t slow the spread of this virus, it will kill the elderly and others. Period.

Don’t call yourself a Christian and endanger your neighbors with your recklessness.

OK, I’ll be nicer for the rest of the column, I promise! Here’s the other way we can be productive in this crisis: We can pray. I know I need to do it more.

If we believe in the sovereign Lord, His Word tells us how to respond to COVID-19, whether we think it’s His judgment or just His way of getting our attention (or both!): “If I shut up heaven that there be no rain, or if I command the locusts to devour the land, or if I send pestilence among my people; if my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.” – 2 Chronicles 7:13–14 If we don’t think we need to seek God’s help with COVID-19, we are deluding ourselves. I think the news and social media have shown that we cannot handle this on our own.

Of course I often learn that lesson the hard way, whether it’s about a virus or my own internal struggles. I met with some friends in a writing group just before self-quarantining started, and I wound up writing the following. It was God’s way of reminding me for the umpteenth time to give up my self-reliance and trust Him: Often when I have too much free time, my mind wanders into the proverbial woods and explores every diversion from every trail until I struggle to find my way back.

Or rather, it’s the same trail, the same questions, leading me like gumdrops to the same house made of sweet self-sufficiency that will not stand — where the evil one awaits his opportunity.

But here’s the thing: If I’m Gretel, I have a Hansel — a better older Brother than in any fairytale — and He walks with me. In fact, one day He gave Himself to be fattened up with my misdeeds and fed to the enemy in the dark of those woods; but then He came back, and He huffed and He puffed, and His Holy Spirit blew down the house of lies on which I’d fed.

Sometimes I still go there, half-expecting the candy house to stand before me. I neglect the feast God offers, and I fear that my coming to His table isn’t enough. I start striving, and I follow those gumdrops into the dark.

But every time I get there, I find the enemy small, toothless and shivering. I find the house of lies melted and gone. My hand finds my older Brother’s, and I turn around.

If God is our Father, Jesus Christ is our ultimate older Brother: interceding on our behalf, dying in our place to pay for our sin, and coming back to life to give us new life. (And unlike the older brother in the prodigal son parable, Jesus is overjoyed when we return to Him and the Father.)

Our Christian Leaders of the Future Class of 2020! See more photos on our Facebook page.

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APRIL 2020 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living

If you haven’t received Jesus as Savior — or if you’ve been trusting in yourself instead of His provision — turn around, beg Him for help, and get out of those woods. He will not fail to run to your side.

A few other COVID-19 thoughts: Please call and check on your elderly neighbors and those with poor access to resources. Also, order a delivery lunch on Sundays if you can, spend the same amount you would eating out after church, and tip double! Our food service workers need it.

Must-reads: • Dan Hall’s column on COVID-19 and how we can respond (page 8).

• Libbo Crosswhite’s column on how we should take advantage of our extra time during #QuarantineLife (page 12).

• Our cover story on Amy and Cliff Bates and their adoption journey (page 18). Y

Katie Eubanks katie@mschristianliving.com

Katie with Christian Leaders scholarship winners Miles Johnson, left, and Annah Jane Kyser, who will each be awarded $2,000.

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➺as i see it

by DAN HALL

Apocalypse, panic, or reset?

“I

’ve been to a world’s fair and two county picnics and haven’t seen anything like this!” goes one of my

favorite quotes from one of my favorite people, Bobby Thompson. I’ve used it as my own since the first time I heard him say it in 1983. It describes that internal “Oh, wow … This is blowing my mind!”

I am not alone when I say that as I watch the global crisis unfolding in front of us, I’m stunned. But in all honesty, it’s not the COVID-19 pandemic that has stunned me. Rather, it’s the reaction that is, truly, completely baffling to me. I believe we have seen excessively worse situations that have created significantly less response. For some reason, this has taken on legs of its own.

In the movie “Men in Black,” Agent K (Tommy Lee Jones) is explaining to Agent J (Will Smith) why the government doesn’t simply admit the presence of aliens: Smith: “Why don’t we just tell them?

People are smart.”

Jones: “The person is smart, but people are dumb, panicky, dangerous animals.”

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APRIL 2020 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living

Wise individuals get swept up into groupthink and mob mentality. I believe we are seeing a lot of that now. Regardless of my view of the seriousness or insignificance of this outbreak, the collective panic is real, resulting in a devastating global impact.

So how do we, as believers, respond? Let me tackle three large questions.

What is real?

1. The panic is real.

There are varying degrees of opinion regarding this outbreak, from “This is the next great plague” to “Oh, brother!” I have friends who haven’t opened their door in three weeks, and I have friends who still left on a cruise.

Within my own family, my six grown children (five of them with their own children) are divided between those who lean toward the “next plague” narrative and those who feel, “This is way overblown.”

What is undeniable is that EVERYONE is being impacted by the global panic regardless of whether they themselves are panicking.

2. The severity of the virus is real.

While neither a medical specialist nor an epidemiologist, I presently have a contract with the Mississippi State Department of Health. My specific area of responsibility includes both the Office of Emergency Preparedness and Response (which mobilizes during any health crisis and emergency, from pandemics to hurricanes) as well as the Division of Epidemiology. This has allowed me a front row seat to what’s happening in Mississippi.

According to TIME magazine, the CDC estimates that up to 42.9 million people got sick during the 2018-2019 flu season. Of those 42.9 million, 647,000 were hospitalized and 61,200 died (https://time.com/5610878/2018-2019-fluseason/). That’s a mortality rate significantly less than 1 percent of those estimated to be sick, and 9 percent of those hospitalized.

The qualities of COVID-19 that make it a significantly greater challenge than the “regular” flu are: 1) how long it can exist outside the host, therefore lengthening how contagious it can be even if you’re not around someone who is sick; 2) its exponential impact

on the elderly and the autoimmunity deficiency population; 3) the severity of its symptoms in those who do experience it; and 4) the woefully inadequate capacity of healthcare facilities and supplies for the level and length of treatment needed to serve the more severely affected.

The Imperial College in the UK put out a report anticipating the spread and impact of the virus both in Great Britain and in the United States (https://doi.org/10.25561/77482).

Seeking to present an objective, rational report, their findings and recommendations can scare the bejeebers out of you! The lingering effects of the virus may take up to 12 months to run its course. They do believe that with some of the more intense measures like self-quarantine, moving education to online for a season, and social distancing, the contagion is significantly lowered and shortened.

3. The economic impact is real.

Without boring you to death with the details, the global economic system is a complicated web of companies producing, consumers buying, and investors investing in stock markets operating based on an algorithm of all of it together. Bottom line: If one stick in this pile is significantly altered, the whole thing can go up in flames.

So the economic breakdown goes something like this: China’s productivity dropped because of all the sick people, which means businesses cannot make things they can sell with those Chinese goods, which means those businesses cannot make money, so investors giving money to those companies pull out their cash, leaving the businesses without cash flow, so they lay off people. Those people don’t have money to buy things, exasperating back around to the start of the cycle … thus starts the death spiral.

That’s what has happened. At the point of this writing (two weeks before publication), the last three years of gains have been wiped out in

the stock market. The likelihood that will recover anytime soon is slim.

Are there any silver linings?

Back to the beginning of this article: What has stunned me the most has been the global reaction. But it has also got me thinking: “What’s really going on? What’s God doing in all of this?”

First, I believe there is a global “reset” going on. As a student of the stock market, I personally believe it was way overheated. Many of our attempts to “protect our money and way of life” weren’t always good monetary policy. This reset will have positive long-term benefit.

Second, we are being forced to do things differently. But it’s creating innumerable opportunities. Videoconferencing and the internet have allowed me to continue to serve my clients, do my school and even serve my church. Once we pull our head out of the fear

and chaos, we discover new possibilities and open new opportunities. This has been a great time for our family to spend more time together, to knock out some projects and to talk about life itself.

Finally, I believe this reset will expose both our greed and our fragility. Jesus warned us in Matthew 6:24, “You cannot serve God and money.” I enjoy many of the things I do because I live in a culture that affords me those luxuries.

But we always run a danger of falling in love with the blessing and forgetting the Blesser.

This is a great time for us to realign our hearts and find our joy and confidence, not in our 401(k)s or growing bank accounts or wonderful vacations … as wonderful as those may feel … but in Christ Himself.

I’ve seen many churches more engaged with their people and their community than I’ve ever noticed before. I’ve heard many who feel this may be a spiritual turning point. I can’t disagree.

mschristianliving.com ❘ APRIL 2020 9

“I believe we have seen excessively worse situations that have created significantly less response. For some reason, this has taken on legs of its own.”

So, what do we do?

I’ve read quite a few opinion pieces, commentaries and other collective points of perspective. Some border on stupidity: “Build a bunker, buy gold and hide” to “Don’t worry about it.” If you’re in any leadership role (business owner, pastor, parent, educator, etc.), finding the balance between your personal opinion and the collective response is a challenge. Here is my checklist I’ve tried to follow:

1. Stay calm. The self-defeating nature of

panic requires someone to stand still while everyone is running in circles. Being frenetic does not facilitate anything productive. In fact, it feeds into its own frenzy. Whether you choose to sit by a body of water to pray or think, journal, go for a run or simply relax with a cup of coffee, slow your heart rate. Paul told his spiritual son Timothy, “Keep your head in all situations.”

2. Educate yourself. I am not, by nature, a

researcher. I want headlines and bottom lines. But when something this large occurs, we must educate ourselves. The internet and cable television often feed group-think in chaos, but they can also be valuable tools of information to the diligent and insightful seeker. Don’t just listen to your favorite cable station and believe you have a bead on things. Listen to people with whom you may even disagree and look for articles from reputable sources.

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APRIL 2020 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living

3. Use wisdom. I was scheduled to be in

Central America the last two weeks of March for alternative treatment for my underlying health issues. While I am in the high-risk group, I’ve not been concerned about this virus. Granted, I’m probably in denial. However, I AM terrified of getting quarantined in a developing nation! Only slightly less is the terror I feel of being quarantined on a military base after returning. The logistics of taking care of a quadriplegic my size and with my personality are daunting! I canceled the trip, not out of fear of coronavirus, but out of the reality that, regardless of my health, I cannot control whether somebody on my plane will test positive, resulting in me being stuck with personnel arguing over “who’s gonna take care of the crippled guy over there?” Wash your hands, and practice the discipline of social distancing, elbow bumps and other recommendations by our leaders and experts.

4. Serve others. I’ve been so moved by

stories of younger people going grocery shopping for older people and their families, in their neighborhoods or in their churches. I hear stories of people just wanting to call and check on others. We’ve all seen the videos of people on their balconies in apartment complexes leading in yoga exercises or songs. These types of crises allow us the opportunity to show Christ’s love to others in very tangible and existential ways. Let’s look for those opportunities!

5. Pull on your faith. One of my favorite

phrases in scripture is Paul’s exhortation to the church at Colossae: “Let the peace of Christ rule your hearts.” That word “rule” can also be translated into our English word “umpire.” If I’m willing to stay calm, I am more capable of hearing His guidance in my heart. Further, if I start down the road that’s not correct, I’ll hear Him warn me by shouting, “Foul,” allowing me to correct course.

In the last hundred years, we’ve emerged from two World Wars, the Spanish flu, the Cold War, ISIS, the Patriots winning six Super Bowls, and the Cowboys’ Jerry Jones (well, it’s yet to be seen if we can survive him!). Go back 500 years, and it’s even more daunting. Three thousand years? We ain’t got nothing on those folks!

It will be ugly for a little while, but it’s not the end. As people of faith, we have the added comfort of one of my favorite scriptures, Psalm 46, which begins: “God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.

Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging.” Y Dan Hall is an executive and strategic coach to leaders and executive teams. He also works with organizations on team building, conflict resolution and communication skills.

He and his wife, Hazel, have six children and four grandchildren.You can reach him at Dan@OnCourseSolutions.com.

➺

mission mississippi moments

by FELICIA BOWENS

Commit your work to the Lord, together!

S

ince joining the staff at Mission Mississippi, I have been

privileged to experience firsthand the work of this great organization in its efforts to encourage and demonstrate grace in the body of Christ across racial lines — from attending the weekly prayer breakfast gatherings across the Jackson metro, to participating in Generation Next meetings, to engaging with fellow Christians at the Living Reconciled Celebration, to joining Christians in prayer for our state legislators at the Legislative Prayer Breakfast. If we have learned one thing, it is that only TOGETHER are we able to connect and cultivate relationships despite racial boundaries to advance the kingdom of God. In thinking about togetherness, consider for a moment the acronym TEAM — Together Everyone Achieves More. In this acronym, the word “together” is fundamental to a TEAM being able to achieve anything. The same is true for the body of Christ: When we come together and work together as God’s children, we can more effectively accomplish the work of the Father.

Togetherness is defined as “the pleasant feeling of being united with other people in friendship and understanding.” And so, when we as Christians can come together across racial lines to cultivate intentional, loving relationships that are built on trust, respect and truth, we not only strengthen but unify the body of Christ as a whole. “For just as each of us has

one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we, though many, form one body, and each member belongs to all the others.”

(Romans 12:4) It is with TOGETHERNESS in mind that Mission Mississippi has launched an exciting yearlong social media campaign, “Together,” to amplify the message of living reconciled (2 Corinthians 5:12-21) and to unite the church.

Over the next 12 months, Mission Mississippi will unveil a new theme and scripture for each month. These themes and scriptures are intended to promote

togetherness and foster meaningful dialogue in the body. The campaign will be loaded with facts, reminders, encouragement and opportunities for YOU to join the conversation through various social media channels. You can be a part of the dialogue by visiting Mission Mississippi’s Facebook, Twitter and Instagram platforms.

For the month of April, the theme is Work Together, and the key verse is Proverbs 16:3 — “Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established.” During the month of April, Mission Mississippi wants to motivate you to join other Christians across racial lines to work together in brotherly and sisterly love. When we pray together, love together, listen together and work together, God is in the midst. Jesus states in Matthew 18:30 that “where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them.”

In the insightful words of Henry Ford, “Coming together is a beginning, keeping together is progress, working together is success.” Let us work together as brothers and sisters in Christ to fulfill the Great Commission.

Y Felicia Bowens is executive assistant to the president of Mission Mississippi. She lives in Byram with her son, attends Kingdom Empowerment Center, and is a member of the Metropolitan Women’s Ministry.

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601.856.5660 Serving Metro Jackson and Hattiesburg mschristianliving.com ❘ APRIL 2020 11

➺modern motherhood

by LIBBO CROSSWHITE

The gift of time

T

hat day when evening came, he said to his disciples, “Let us go over to the other side.” Leaving the crowd

behind, they took him along, just as he was, in the boat. There were also other boats with him. A furious squall came up, and the waves broke over the boat, so that it was nearly swamped. Jesus was in the stern, sleeping on a cushion. The disciples woke him and said to him, “Teacher, don’t you care if we drown?”

He got up, rebuked the wind and said to the waves, “Quiet! Be still!” Then the wind died down and it was completely calm.

He said to his disciples, “Why are you so afraid? Do you still have no faith?” – Mark 4:35-40 As I sit here during my all-too-brief alone time during newly mandated nap time, I am at a loss for words and having difficulty placing my current emotions. I want so badly for fear not to reign in our current state. The truth of the matter is that when/if you read this month’s article, it will be sometime around April 1 — a day that quite honestly seems a lifetime away at this point, day four of my 14-day selfimposed quarantine.

I’m a homeschool mom now — something I never would have thought I would be. I also cook and clean my house out of boredom.

This is for sure an alternate universe from my life four days ago.

It’s no secret that COVID-19 has somewhat dominated our actions and conversations over the last couple weeks. Honestly, I wept after my church livestreamed their service on March 15 and got teary-eyed on a conference call with my coworkers earlier. I miss everything already.

And yet, I am reminded that so many times when I laid my head down at night after an impossibly long day full of tasks, errands, practices, homework and activities, I would whisper, “I just wish everything could slow down.”

The fact of the matter is, everything has slowed down. And I mean EVERYTHING. So often in the fourth nine weeks of the school year, I am overwhelmed and exhausted with all of the events that occur. I talk with senior parents often who speak to the fact that they just wish time would slow down. They want to be able to soak up the last few weeks with their senior, but their schedule simply does not allow for that.

And now. It does.

I’m not belittling the real danger that many Americans are in. I am also aware of the fact that by the time this article publishes, new and different difficulties have probably reared their heads. However, the same Jesus who calmed the sea for the disciples can and will do that for us now in these uncertain storms. It was the message our preacher preached on Sunday, and one that I desperately need to continue to remind myself of: “Quiet. Be still!”

Now, more than ever, God has given us that chance. The chance to take the time to have our kindergartner read to us, and more than once. The mid-morning snuggles that take place because the alarm clock is not sounding, and the car isn’t already cranked before anyone is dressed or ready. We are in uncharted territory in terms of time — for the first time in my seven years of motherhood, I

have an abundance of it. No meetings, no obligations, just time.

I pray that I continue to keep that the focus of my heart in the days ahead. Thank you, Lord, for time. For time with myself in Your Word to remind me that fear is not the outflow of my heart in this moment, and time making up games to play with my family on hour two of what seems like 40 in the day. My comforts and obligations have been for the most part stripped away; however, the truth still remains: God is able. God is in control. God has ordained this time, in the joy and in the suffering, for His ultimate glory. Y

Libbo Haskins Crosswhite and her husband, Clay, live in Madison and attend Pinelake. They have one daughter, Mary Thomas, who is 6 years old, and a son, Russell, who is 4 years old. She is the high school guidance counselor at MadisonRidgeland Academy and can be emailed at lcrosswhite@mrapats.org.

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APRIL 2020 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living

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➺health &wellness

by STAN BUCKLEY

Helping the whole person in Haiti

A

t But God Ministries (BGM), we consider education, nutrition and medical care to be part of the health and wellness of the whole person. For example, education is

necessary so that people can know the proper food to eat and the proper way to keep their homes in good sanitary condition. Proper nutrition is essential for a person to become strong and healthy and to keep from getting sick. Medical care is necessary for those times when a person becomes sick.

Our Ridgeland-based organization places a special emphasis on the physical health and wellness of people. In Haiti, we have two medical clinics and one Inpatient Malnutrition Center. At these locations, we see some of the poorest and sickest people in the world.

Our second annual Food for Life event on July 30 will be used to fund our Malnutrition Center in Haiti and our two medical clinics in Haiti. In a short period of time, our Malnutrition Center has treated more than 200 children for up to seven weeks at a time. These children come to us severely malnourished and in need of more care than an outpatient facility can provide. We provide round-the-clock care with our full-time nurses and nannies. In addition, we have a Haitian pediatrician who checks on the patients every week.

The patients at our Malnutrition Center are usually between a few months and 9 years old. We give them proper nutrition as well as a great deal of love and kindness. In addition, we have a room where the mothers can stay. These mothers take classes where they are taught

proper ways to care for their children. Often when the mother and child first arrive, they are not bonding well. After a few days or weeks, they are inseparable.

We have a full-time Canadian nurse named Jaimie who lives at the Malnutrition Center and gives oversight to this ministry. Jaimie was born in Haiti 24 years ago. Her mom died a short while after giving birth. Jaimie’s father already had one other child, and now his wife was dead. He decided to allow a Canadian missionary couple to adopt Jaimie. As a result, Jaimie grew up in Canada and graduated from nursing school there.

A few years ago, Jaimie became more curious about her birth parents and was able to meet her Haitian family members. Then she moved to Haiti to use her nursing background to help the people of her original country. After living and working in Haiti for a number of months, Jaimie was ready to make a move, and she came to work at BGM. An added bonus of the Malnutrition Center is that 15 Haitian people have full-time jobs, including nurses, nannies, cooks, cleaning personnel and security guards.

Our two medical clinics in Haiti treat thousands of patients who would otherwise not have access to medical care. Our full-time Haitian doctors and nurses treat the patients. The lab at one of the clinics is able to test patients’ blood and confirm the diagnoses of the doctors. The technicians in our two pharmacies dispense the needed medicine. Our full-time American Nurse Practitioner missionary, Tony West, gives oversight to our clinics in Haiti.

At our two medical clinics, we treat patients for a variety of sicknesses and accidents including: hypertension, diabetes, STDs, parasites, respiratory illnesses, burns, coughs, colds and fractures.

In addition, we often host dental clinics where we perform countless extractions.

Some patients will walk five or six hours from high in the mountains to come to our clinics. Often, patients arrive outside the clinic at 3 in the morning to secure a place in line.

Whenever we have visiting American medical teams, we conduct mobile medical clinics in which we travel to remote locations and set up a temporary medical clinic in a village church. Thereafter, we treat patients all day long and then travel to a different remote village the next day.

Starting in June, we will start a mobile medical unit high in the mountains of Haiti near the border with the Dominican Republic. We have hired a full-time Haitian doctor, Haitian nurse, and Haitian assistant. This mobile medical unit will travel to four villages each week to provide much needed medical care as well as the good news of the gospel.

To purchase a ticket to the Food for Life event on July 30 or to make a donation to the medical work in Haiti, please visit butgodministries.com/food-for-life. Y

Stan Buckley is the founder and executive director of But God Ministries (BGM), with operations in Haiti and the Mississippi Delta. He is also a former attorney and the former senior pastor of First Baptist Church of Jackson. Stan has been married to Jewell since 1989, and they have twin sons (1993) and a daughter (1996).

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APRIL 2020 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living

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If you aren’t sure whether you have a relationship with God or where you’ll go when you die, please don’t put this magazine down until you’ve read the following:

✝ THE PROBLEM For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God. – Romans 3:23 For the wages of sin is death… – Romans 6:23a The natural result and consequence of our sin is eternal death, or hell (Revelation 20:15), separated from God. This is because God is completely perfect and holy (Matthew 5:48), and His justice demands that sin be punished (Proverbs 11:21).

✝ THE SOLUTION

…but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord. – Romans 6:23b But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. – Romans 5:8 Jesus Christ died in our place on the cross and took on the punishment for all our sins (Isaiah 53:4-6). Then God raised Him from the dead (John 20)!

✝ HOW TO RECEIVE SALVATION

If you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead, you will be saved. – Romans 10:9

✝ IS IT FOR ANYONE?

Trust in what Jesus has done for you — His death for your sins and His resurrection — and trust Him as Lord.

✝ THE RESULTS

For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved. – Romans 10:13

Therefore being justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. – Romans 5:1 For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. – Romans 8:38-39

✝ WHAT TO DO NEXT

So then faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by the word of God. – Romans 10:17

If you decided to trust in Jesus, grow in your faith by reading more of God’s Word in the Bible. We recommend the gospel of John (it comes just after Luke) as a good starting point — or Romans!

Finding a church close to you that teaches faith in Christ is another important step. It’s crucial to spend time with other believers so we can encourage each other in our faith.

If you have questions about anything on this page, please contact us at 601.896.1432, or send us a message on Facebook @MSChristianLiving, Instagram @mschristianmag or Twitter @MSChristLiving.

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APRIL 2020 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living

➺

this is my story

by PAULINE ROGERS

From prisoner to reformer

I

grew up in rural Vancleave on the Mississippi Gulf Coast as a chubby girl with low self-esteem, the oldest of 11 siblings. My first experience in a courtroom was at the age of 9, testifying about my father’s death, which I’d witnessed at the hands of my mother in self-defense. I’d helped her put him in the car, and he’d died en route to the hospital.

After my father’s death, my mother became a workaholic and was rarely around. We were with my grandmother and mom’s baby sister most of the time. My grandmother, a devout Christian, instilled in me that the older was responsible for the younger. I took this literally.

We were poor and didn’t always have sufficiency. I would look at funeral announcements in the newspaper. I would dress up my siblings and take them to the church, not to grieve but to get to the repast, where we could always get food.

It wasn’t long after that I began stealing simple things to help provide for me and my family’s needs and desires. I stole from department stores, dollar stores, grocery stores, outlet malls … anything within walking distance.

I was 11 the first time I was caught. The police officer pulled me aside, explained that I shouldn’t steal, paid for the stolen goods, drove me home and gave me $7. But that didn’t teach me a lesson. I was arrested several more times after that without serious consequences.

However, in my late 20s, I was looking at a sixyear sentence with the state, and life as a habitual offender with the federal government.

Sitting in a county jail before I went to prison, I met a volunteer who introduced me to Jesus. That turned everything around: I was the same me, but I felt new. I repented and asked Jesus into my heart. Although locked up, I felt free.

By the time I got to the Central Mississippi Correctional Facility, scared and not knowing anything about prison besides what I’d seen on television, I was intent on practicing good behavior and coming home.

Wendy Hatcher, the first female chaplain hired by the Mississippi Department of Corrections, said she noticed something special about me after I attended several of her Bible studies. I liked her a lot. I felt like I could trust her. She was intelligent and able to assist me in a lot of things.

She hired me to work for her. I helped her with standard assistant tasks like paperwork; however, she also let me assist with more

years, both male and female, and housed two men and hundreds of women, with 31 years of zero recidivism.

I once was an abused, lost girl with low selfesteem; now I’m the director of a ministry that reaches out to families like me. I can only say that my life is one of amazing transformation and amazing grace. I felt like an old, dirty, crusty, trampled penny on the ground that no one wanted to pick up. But one person saw value in that penny, picked it up, cleaned it up and added more pennies to it. Now I’m picking up more pennies, as the pennies are reflective of every person I meet. Y

Pauline and Frederick Rogers.

nuanced duties, like ministering to other prisoners. If there was a death in an inmate’s family, Wendy would take me with her to meet with the prisoner to comfort them, while educating me at the same time.

I served three years of a six-year term.

When I was released in 1987, Wendy let me live with her in Brandon. While living with Wendy over the next four years, I was hired by an OB-GYN named Dr. Beverly McMillan — a special events speaker whom I’d met when I was in prison. Her office administrator, Patricia McNulty, hired me to work as a maid in Dr. McMillan’s office. After I proved myself, my responsibilities grew, and I worked there for the next 27 years.

I married my husband, Frederick, two years after he was released from almost 16 years of incarceration. We started our own ministry to others coming out of prison because of the needs we’d witnessed firsthand. Our 501(c)(3) is the Reaching and Educating for Community Hope (RECH) Foundation, with the Wendy Hatcher Transitional Home and three other transitional homes on a 27-acre reentry campus; the MORE (Mississippi Offender Reentry Establishment) training initiative; plus several other ministries under the RECH umbrella.

I wanted to name a home after Wendy Hatcher to honor her impact on my life.

We have assisted thousands over the

Pauline Rogers is the founder and executive director of the Reaching & Educating for Community Hope (RECH) Foundation. She lives in Jackson with her husband, Frederick. They are very active in their local community and at New Horizon Church International. She has one son and two grandchildren. She is a criminal justice reform activist, advocate and consultant for Clergy for Prison Reform.

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From left: Owen, Levi, Cliff, Amy and Ellis Bates at home in Ridgeland.

‘We’re God’s adopted kids’ How Amy and Cliff Bates went from ‘easy street’ to mixed-race adoption

by KATIE EUBANKS

S

even-year-old Levi Bates appears, for a second, at the front door of the house — he’s a flash of pink buttondown, blue jeans, brown skin and dimpled smile — and turns and darts away.

Now he’s chunking small basketballs into an arcade-style hoop. Yes, it’s set up right there in the front foyer. And yes, he is showing out.

His mother, Amy, laughs. She doesn’t seem to mind the big hunk of plastic interrupting her décor. After all, boys live here.

A couple years ago at the beach, another child asked Levi, “Why are you so brown and your family is white?”

“Because God painted me this way,” Levi replied.

That is both the complete truth and the tip of the iceberg.

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APRIL 2020 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living

‘That’s youth right there’ Amy and Cliff Bates met in the mid-’90s at the University of Mississippi, when Amy was a junior.

“When I met Cliff, he was not a believer, and I was not living like one,” Amy says. (“I certainly contributed to that,” Cliff adds.) When Amy graduated, she broke up with him, moved to Nashville, got involved in a church and rekindled her faith.

“I continued to write him letters, and sent him scriptures, how to be a Christian … I prayed for him the whole time,” she says.

“Eight months after we broke up, he called me on the landline ... He said, ‘I wanted to ask Jesus into my heart, and I wanted to be with you when I did it.’ He drove four hours each way (to do that).”

“That’s youth right there,” Cliff says.

They didn’t get back together immediately — “I wanted to see if (his faith) was real,” Amy says — but she soon saw conviction in him where there’d been none before. By 1999 they were engaged, and in 2000 they were married.

They settled in the Jackson area. Amy started out as a kindergarten teacher, and later became a stay-at-home mom as they had two sons: Ellis in 2003, Owen in 2005. Cliff was a real estate developer. Life was good.

And “we were completely done (having kids),” Cliff says.

‘We weren’t getting any younger’ But they went on mission trips. They saw poverty and hopelessness. Then, they were asked for a favor: Would they host a few boys

KYLE HANCOCK STEGALL IMAGERY

From left: Owen, Levi and Ellis Bates.

STEGALL IMAGERY

from the African Children’s Choir while they were in town? Another family had to cancel.

“Sometimes our ‘no’ is someone else’s yes,’ ” Amy says. “During that time (when we kept the boys), God started whispering the word ‘adoption’ to my heart. (But) I didn’t want to say anything to (Cliff) until I was sure.”

She prayed for a month, and then one evening she went and sat down beside her husband. “I couldn’t even get the words out. I

was crying,” she says. (“I had no idea what she was about to say,” Cliff recalls.)

Finally, Amy told him, “I don’t know if God’s asking us to adopt, but He’s definitely asking us to pray about adoption.”

Cliff had felt a bit of a tug in that direction as well. They prayed about it for a year. “It was the first time in our marriage where we had had to really come together and pray for something major,” Amy says.

Throughout that year, God kept putting adoption in front of them, whether in the form of a sermon or actual adoptive parents.

Then one day, “I had been journaling in the morning and asking for clear confirmation,” Amy says. “And it came from our oldest son, Ellis. I was just making breakfast. The boys had no idea we were praying about this. Ellis was reading Tim Tebow’s book ‘Through My Eyes,’ and he (told me that) Tim Tebow’s parents taught him the importance of caring

for orphans and widows, like it says in James (1:27).”

Around that same time, Cliff says, “it became clear that if we said no, it would be clear disobedience (to God’s will for our lives).

And, we weren’t getting any younger.”

‘Speechless’ God gave them a longing for another child.

But they were also scared. “We’re human,” Amy says.

“I had a dream one night that I was in an orphanage, and I felt all this fear. I was overwhelmed. At that time, we didn’t know if we were going to adopt internationally or domestically, and I was afraid of doing the wrong thing. And at 4 a.m. God wakes me up from that dream with the loudest whisper that repeated over and over: ‘Perfect love casts out fear.’ From then on, I had no fear.”

The Bateses decided to say yes to wherever

mschristianliving.com ❘ APRIL 2020 19

STEGALL IMAGERY

Amy points to a scripture that has been meaningful to her and Cliff. One of their favorite verses is Psalm 115:1, which begins, “Not to us, LORD, not to us but to your name be the glory.”

Ellis wrote this paper in school about his favorite “character,” Tim Tebow, and how Tim’s words inspired the adoption of Ellis’ little brother Levi.

Amy and Cliff bought blue balloons to surprise Ellis and Owen with the news they were getting a baby brother.

Amy’s first photo with Levi, in Augusta, Georgia.

Daddy’s little buddy.

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APRIL 2020 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living

Ellis, left, and Owen meet Levi for the first time.

God led them. As they sought the Lord (and Google), they initially felt called to Honduras.

They even put down a large hunk of money toward adoption there. They requested not to be matched with an infant.

While waiting to be matched, they were asked to foster a local baby who was biracial.

The birth mother ultimately decided to keep her child – but now Amy and Cliff felt redirected. Once again, they consulted Google.

They found a domestic adoption agency that had an urgent need for couples to adopt mixed-race babies. The agency said that after the Bateses completed their home study, they’d have a baby in less than six months.

“Six months turned into two weeks,” Cliff says. In summer 2012, the agency told them about a biracial baby boy about to be born in Augusta, Georgia. Cliff and Amy prepared to leave Jackson at any moment.

That night, “at 3:30 (a.m.) I had woken up and been praying for (the baby),” Amy says. He was born shortly thereafter, and at 5 a.m., she and Cliff started the 10-hour drive to Augusta.

When they got to hold Levi at the hospital, it was “instant love,” they both say. Amy didn’t bother wiping away the happy tears for her first-ever photo with her new son.

The Lord also gave her and Cliff the opportunity to love on Levi’s birth mother.

“The agency had cautioned us about how much of our faith we share (with the birth parents), because we don’t know where they stand,” Amy says. “(But) the Lord gave (me and

Spring Banquet & Silent Auction Thursday, May 7th New Horizon Church Jackson, MS Auction 5:00 - 6:30 PM Banquet 6:30 - 8:00 PM “It was the first time we had had to really come together and pray about something major,” Amy says of the decision to adopt.

the birth mom) an instant connection.”

After taking Levi to another room to bond with him for a couple hours, Amy and Cliff returned and found the birth mother sitting in a rocking chair. She asked them to pray for her.

“Cliff went immediately and stood behind her and put his hands on her shoulders, and I got to kneel in front of her and put her head on my shoulder, and tell her how precious she was to Jesus, and how much He loves her,” Amy says. “She said no one had ever told her that before.

“There aren’t many times I’m speechless in life, but we were speechless after that.”

Cliff and Amy had to stay in Georgia for 10 days in case the birth parents changed their minds. But “we didn’t feel any anxiety at all,” Cliff says.

“It wasn’t necessarily that she wouldn’t change her mind, but we just trusted God’s plan (regardless),” Amy says. “(When) we went to do the paperwork with the social worker and the birth parents, we got to pray in a circle with Levi right there. … We never thought about the birth parent being a major part of our time there, but it was.”

The Bateses also have the freedom to

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contact the birth parents later, thanks to a semi-open adoption.

Oh, and all that money Cliff and Amy had put toward the Honduran adoption? That money offset the costs for another adoptive family.

“God went before us and behind us … and He provided for that family as well,” Amy says.

‘We’re God’s adopted kids’ Just like that, in July 2012, the Bateses were a family of five.

The hardest part about being adoptive parents, Amy says, “has been trying to communicate to Levi, in language that he understands, about being adopted and what that means.

“We were counseled before we adopted to be open with him from the beginning, so it is all he will know, but when he’s your son and you look into those eyes and that face you love so much, it is a difficult thing to explain.”

What about the easy part?

Cliff says that before adopting, he wondered if he’d be able to love an adopted child as much as he loved Ellis and Owen. But there’s no question that, “in our eyes, there’s no difference,” Cliff says. “God completely

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Pastor Ken Murphy, center, of Pinelake Madison, prays over the Bates family at Levi’s baby dedication in September 2012.

Levi and Owen.

From left: Owen, Levi and Ellis.

Levi, pictured with Ellis, has always loved swim time with his family.

From left: Ellis, Levi and Owen.

From left: Cliff, Owen, Levi, Amy and Ellis.

KYLE HANCOCK

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APRIL 2020 â?˜ Mississippi Christian Living

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Cliff wondered if he’d be able to love an adopted child as much as his biological sons, but “God completely covers that,” he says. “I don’t look at Levi and think the word ‘adoption.’”

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covers that. I don’t look at (Levi) and think the sonship, they do see the difference in his skin opened to “the reality of what people (of color) word ‘adoption.’ ” color. They celebrate that difference. They also have to deal with. … It’s something we have to Amy agrees wholeheartedly and says know it will prove challenging. prepare for, and prepare (Levi) for, upfront.” becoming Levi’s mother has helped her see “Having Levi has opened our eyes to how That includes getting pulled over by police. how much God loves His children in Christ. much we still have to grow in (terms of race Before adopting Levi, Cliff and Amy could hear When a person puts their trust in Jesus, God relations),” Amy says. “I had this Pollyanna about officer-involved shootings and give law adopts him or her into His family. Just as Amy approach (before). I thought it wasn’t that enforcement the benefit of the doubt. But now, and Cliff love Levi as much as they love their complicated or bad anymore. God has they have a child of color. They can no longer other boys, God loves every believer as afford not to take it seriously. much as He loves His only begotten Son. “I have had friends say, ‘We’ve got to “Levi was 4 months old. I was just teach our white children what to do staring at him, and out of the blue, God when they’re pulled over, because says (to me), ‘Don’t you understand? I they’ll model it for (Levi if he’s with love you like (I love) Jesus.’ And that’s in them),’ ” Amy says.

His Word, in John 17:26. Mind-blowing.

She’s grateful for the racial diversity We’re God’s adopted kids.” present at Jackson Academy, where all Ellis and Owen are 16 and 14. Ellis three boys attend. “It’s important for us plays baseball and basketball, and that Levi knows how to navigate black Owen performs in show choir (when culture,” she says. there’s not a coronavirus pandemic on However, she and Cliff don’t the loose). They tease their little brother; necessarily hammer on race and play basketball with him in the foyer; put adoption at every meal. him in gentle headlocks.

“We don’t talk about it unless (Levi) Ellis, whose reading material asks. We’re always open if he has confirmed for Amy that she and Cliff questions, but we don’t want to always should adopt, says he was very excited have adoption at the forefront.” to get a new baby brother, and now he can’t imagine life without Levi. The best ‘We wouldn’t change a thing’ part is knowing that God chose him for Amy and Cliff hope there’s their family, Ellis says. somebody out there who will read this Owen says he was not nervous about story, realize it’s not too late to adopt, the adoption at all, and now he doesn’t and persist even when it gets hard. even see Levi as an adopted brother, Because it will. but just a brother. Owen also loves “But we wouldn’t change a thing,” having someone else to mess around Cliff says. “We wouldn’t want to go back with when he gets bored (which has to to that easy place.” be so true now, during “What we have gained and what our #QuarantineLife!). kids have gained is — we can’t put it What about Levi himself? As Amy into words,” Amy says. said, he’s too young to understand many The Bateses take scripture’s of the implications of his adoption. For admonition “to visit the fatherless and now, his actions — those of a young boy widows in their affliction” very seriously Amy says she’s grateful for the racial diversity present at Jackson who’s more than comfortable in his home Academy, where Levi and his brothers attend.

— but they want to be clear, they don’t — speak volumes. He bounces off the believe God calls everyone to adopt. He walls (more accurately, the couch) during just calls us all “to look for ways we can brought some sweet friendships into my life this interview. When the photographer lets him love the most vulnerable,” Amy says. that have shown me (the truth). go barefoot for the cover shoot, Levi yells, And if He does call you to adopt?

“I have learned that to say we are “YAAAYYY!” “He will lead you each step of the way,” she ‘colorblind’ is not kind. I’ve learned that When asked to name his favorite thing to says. “You will not miss God or miss the child do with his family, Levi said making s’mores in through Levi. To say we’re colorblind is like He has for you, because as you walk in saying, ‘I don’t see who God has created you to obedience, He will open the right doors. the fire pit at night. He also enjoys the pool: be.’ Kids do see color. They’re not colorblind.

During a follow-up call with Amy, Levi can be “I think about Joseph, Jesus’ adoptive father.

Levi knows his birth father is African-American After he did what God said, then God gave heard in the background, urging the rest of and his birth mom is white.” the family in play. him the next step. We get so caught up in Amy says she and Cliff now are advocates needing the whole picture, but God doesn’t for racial healing and reconciliation. “We feel ‘We can no longer stay silent’ work that way. We are called to walk by faith, like we can no longer stay silent.”

While Cliff and Amy don’t see Levi as any not by sight.” Y Cliff says he and Amy’s eyes have been different than their older boys in terms of

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APRIL 2020 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living

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➺feature

by KATIE EUBANKS

Equally yoked Devon and Jacqueline Loggins fulfill their calling at Methodist Children’s Homes of Mississippi

D

evon and Jacqueline Loggins met in prison — well, sort of.

He likes to joke about it. “It’s the security answer for all my passwords: ‘Where did you meet your spouse?’”

They both were social workers at D. Ray James Prison in Folkston, Georgia.

“Maybe on the second day, I walked past this lady,” Devon says. “I never saw her face, just the back of her. She was standing at a table doing something. And the Holy Spirit in me just went, ‘Wow.’ “When you work in prisons, you can either date your coworkers, and your career will probably go downhill — or you can just marry your coworker. That’s what we did.”

Jacqueline says she and Devon were “equally yoked,” and not just spiritually.

“We speak the same trauma language (because of our work),” she says. “When people get married, they talk about having a lot in common, but (with us it’s) across the board. Our families, our degrees…”

They had another thing in common, too: They weren’t sure they saw themselves staying in prison work. “(Devon) was the one who initially focused on children (when we thought about changing careers),” Jacqueline says. “We were serving young men coming into prison at 17. It wasn’t 30 (years old) anymore. (We thought) ‘There’s got to be a way we can reach them at an earlier point’ … Even before delinquency.”

Besides wanting to reach young people earlier in their lives, Devon also just wanted to work somewhere else, he says.

“When I first started working in prisons, I was excited. You could tell people what you did, and they’d be super interested in it. And I was making a lot of money. But I was miserable. Now I know it’s because it wasn’t my calling,” he says.

Something that would shake up any kid Looking at inmates’ records, Devon says, “they all either had childhood trauma or had been in foster care.”

He and Jacqueline both could relate, in different ways.

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APRIL 2020 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living

“When people get married, they talk about having a lot in common, but (with us it’s) across the board,” said Jacqueline Loggins, right, of herself and her husband, Devon. The Logginses minister to children at Methodist Children’s Homes — she as a therapist and volunteer, he as CEO.

Devon is quick to say he was never abused or neglected as a child. “In fact, I was the spoiled baby,” he says. But as a 7-year-old growing up near Kilmichael with nine older siblings, he did go through something that would shake up any kid: “I found out that my mother and father were really my grandparents, and that those nine older siblings were my aunts and uncles — except one was my mom. I remember moving back to Chicago with (my mom) and butting heads, because I saw her as my sister.”

Jacqueline had four sisters and one brother.

For five years, she was in foster care — but only with her brother and one sister. Nobody was willing to take all six siblings together.

“There was always in the back of my mind, ‘Where are they? Are they safe?’” she says.

“I became maternalized, taking care of my younger sister and brother. And trying to be obedient so nothing would happen to split us apart! It changes your whole life.”

She and Devon didn’t know it, but their experiences were preparing them to make an impact on hundreds of children in the future.

‘The kids everybody else says “no” to’ Devon started working at The Methodist Home for Children & Youth in Macon, Georgia, as a therapist, “and the Lord kept promoting me,” he says.

“I fell in love with that organization. I loved helping staff members, team members, figure out how to deal with people in crisis.”

While he was at the Methodist home, Jacqueline worked in the field of domestic violence. When the opportunity came for Devon to move to Methodist Children’s Homes of Mississippi (MCH), Jacqueline supported his desire to be closer to his family in the Magnolia State. That was seven years ago.

Today, they each have found their calling: Devon is CEO of MCH, while Jacqueline teaches social work at Jackson State University and sees clients as a therapist, both privately and through MCH. The Logginses’ house is on site at the agency, on a road that winds through trees dripping with Spanish moss. (The whole campus is 186 acres.)

“His calling is working with the employees (at MCH). Mine is working with children,” she says. “I focus on sexual abuse, child maltreatment, physical abuse, and children in foster care.”

MCH serves more than 150 children per year in three main service areas: group homes on campus (which can serve up to 40 kids total); therapeutic foster care in the community; and a community mental health center.

The agency has also submitted a proposal to the state Department of Mental Health for a permanency assessment center, which would allow kids to stay at MCH for 60 days while getting a comprehensive assessment of their needs — i.e., where they should be placed.

This on-campus center would also assess underage survivors of human trafficking.

Why is that last part relevant? Well, last year, MCH served six children who were survivors of sex trafficking. Let that sink in.

“About 65 percent of (the children we serve) have significant histories of running away,” Devon says. “Thirty percent have significant histories of substance abuse. Forty percent have significant histories of physical abuse. Eighty percent or more are simply in our care due to neglect, which is failure (of the parents) to provide for basic needs — food, shelter, medical, dental.”

And, “one hundred percent (of the kids we serve) have a mental health diagnosis. And that’s what makes (our foster care) therapeutic,” Devon says. “I would advocate that all kids in foster care receive therapeutic treatment.”

The average age for a kid entering MCH

Devon Loggins, left, with Christopher, a Methodist Children’s Homes alumnus who joined the U.S. Army and “adopted” Devon and Jacqueline.

“We don’t believe in changing kids. We believe in that old adage of planting seeds.

And the Lord waters the seeds. Many times we don’t see it. The average stay (at MCH) is six to nine months.”

“But to reach that one (child) makes you feel good,” Jacqueline says.

A prime example: A young man named Chris who grew up in an MCH group home and, at 18, joined the military. He’s now two years into his service and stationed at Fort Hood, Texas.

“He got his driver’s license after joining the military, he bought a car, and he just drove here from Fort Hood the other day and is staying with us while he’s on leave,” Devon says.

“I’m proud to say he adopted us,” Jacqueline says. “He calls me Mom. He woke me up this morning and said, ‘I’m hungry, Mom.’ ” “That’s when (what we do) counts, is when they leave the system and enter the real world,” Devon says. “We think we know everything at that age, and we don’t.”

A lot of MCH kids have “adopted” the Logginses. So many, in fact, that keeping up with all of them is tough, Jacqueline says.

“You know how they change phones all the time,” Devon adds. “But you’re embarrassed to say, ‘Who is this?’ (when they call).”

Devon and Jacqueline also have three grown children of their own: Christina, an attorney; Danielle, a restaurant manager; and Jordan, an officer with the Jackson Police Department.

‘How do you want to be remembered?’

Jacqueline Loggins, center, with she and Devon’s daughters, Christina (left) and Danielle.

programs is 15 years old. The average number of prior placements in foster homes, group homes or the like? Also 15. So a 15-year-old child could enter MCH with 15 previous “homes” under their belt.

“We take the kids everybody else says ‘no’ to,” Jacqueline says.

Devon confirms: “That’s our reputation.

Sometimes that hurts us. Our data sometimes is not the best. (But) if we don’t (take those kids), from our experience in the criminal justice system, they will be the kids kicking in your front door or robbing you or hurting you,” he says.

Devon quotes psychologist Urie Bronfenbrenner: “Every child needs at least one adult that is irrationally crazy about him or her.”

Only one Person is irrationally crazy about every child.

“We know the love of Jesus Christ is unconditional,” Devon says. “And research shows there’s so many things you can try to do to heal from childhood trauma. But the only thing that will help is a healthy relationship. And that relationship starts with a relationship with the Lord.”

Devon recites another quote, this one the MCH mission statement: “Through Jesus Christ, Methodist Children’s Homes brings hope and healing to hurting children in Mississippi.”

On our own, we can’t do anything. But those first three words, ‘Through Jesus Christ … ‘ MCH shows the love of Christ not only via social services, but personal touches as well.

Most kids keep their bags packed long after they arrive — they’re used to being shuffled around — but Jacqueline and another volunteer will decorate and paint bedrooms in mschristianliving.com ❘ APRIL 2020 27

How you can help MCH • Pray. “We always need prayer, including for things the kids don’t tell us,” Devon says.

• Volunteer your time. And before you say you have nothing to teach a child, think outside the box, Jacqueline says. “It could be anything — arts, music, makeup.”

• Give. “We always need financial support,” Devon says.

“The new (Mississippi) tax credit offers 100 percent back (on your donation), up to $1,000. Not that people give for that reason, but it’s a good way to give. And if you make that a recurring donation, you can just give it right back every year.”

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APRIL 2020 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living

Devon and Jacqueline Loggins, back, with their godchildren Aiden, left, and Aubrey.

advance to make them feel like home.

“It isn’t sterile,” Jacqueline says. “If it’s a girl’s room, we make sure there’s lots of fluffy stuff and pinks. Lewis Furniture in Clinton has donated so much.” (“They know us because my wife also likes

to shop there,” Devon deadpans as Jacqueline smiles with glee.)

Devon says the Jackson community has helped make MCH a productive and powerful experience for the kids. Volunteers come in and lead weekly Bible studies. Bank representatives teach financial literacy.

Therapists, including Jacqueline, provide counseling for the children at no cost.

Eventually, children leave the MCH group homes or age out of MCH’s therapeutic foster care. The question is, what will they take with them from their experience? What will they say as adults when they look back?

Devon hopes they remember MCH as a place where they experienced the love of God. He takes each and every MCH alumnus who’s “adopted” him to heart. Knowing that kids are watching him makes him want to be a better person, he says.

“My old CEO said to me, and this has always stuck with me: ‘Devon, how do you want to be remembered?’” Y

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➺food for thought

by SUNNY HOLLIDAY

Cooking and coping he hosts of MPB Think Radio’s “Deep South Dining” started a timely Facebook group a few weeks ago called Cooking and Coping, and the name certainly fits. Here are a few recipes from one group member that might just help you cope with being cooped up at home. Y

T

SAUSAGE AND SUN-DRIED TOMATO PASTA 1 1 2 8–10 3 ⅛ ⅛ 1 1 ¼

box of your favorite noodles (I like bow tie or penne) pound ground sausage pints heavy whipping cream sun-dried tomatoes (in oil) tablespoons tomato basil pesto teaspoon crushed red pepper flakes teaspoon garlic powder (or freshly minced) teaspoon salt and pepper (or to taste) teaspoon Cavender’s seasoning cup shredded Parmesan cheese

Brown sausage on stovetop, remove from heat and drain.

Chop sun-dried tomatoes and lightly toast in a sauté pan on stovetop for 3-5 minutes, stirring frequently. Remove from heat once toasted.

In a saucepan, pour in heavy whipping cream and bring to boil. Once it starts boiling, add red pepper flakes, garlic, salt, pepper and Cavender’s. Continue to boil on medium 10-12 minutes, stirring occasionally so it doesn’t overflow. Next, add tomato basil pesto and stir. Add browned sausage and toasted sun-dried tomatoes and stir.

Reduce heat to medium low and continue to simmer another 10-12 minutes, stirring occasionally. Sauce will continue to thicken. If sauce gets too thick, add a teaspoon of boiling water from noodles.

While sauce is simmering, boil noodles according to box directions. (I like to add a dash of extra virgin olive oil and salt to my boiling water before adding noodles.)

Drain noodles. Return to pan, and spoon sauce onto noodles. Mix until all noodles are coated in sauce. Serve hot. Sprinkle with Parmesan cheese.

Optional: Serve with bread and salad.

POUND CAKE (This is my grandmother’s recipe.)

2 sticks softened butter ½ cup shortening 3 cups granulated sugar 5 eggs 1½ teaspoons lemon extract 3 cups flour 1 (7.5-ounce can) 7 Up or Sprite Cream butter and shortening. Add sugar and mix until fluffy. Add eggs, one at a time, and mix well. Add lemon extract and flour, then mix again. Fold in 7 Up. Batter will be thin.

Grease a Bundt pan and lightly dust with flour. Pour batter into pan and bake at 350 degrees for 38-43 minutes.

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APRIL 2020 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living

BEEF ENCHILADAS 1 12 1 1 1

pound of ground round flour tortillas cup shredded cheddar cheese packet taco seasoning (or make your own) (10-ounce) can Las Palmas enchilada sauce

Brown ground round. Once browned, remove from pan and blot with paper towels to remove excess grease. Wipe grease out of pan with paper towel. Mix ⅔ cup water with taco seasoning, then pour into pan. Once the mixture is bubbly, return meat to pan. Stir well, reduce to low heat, and simmer 2-3 minutes.

Open enchilada sauce and coat the bottom of a casserole dish or glass pan.

Enchilada assembly: Spoon 2 tablespoons of meat into each tortilla, sprinkle cheese, roll up like a soft taco, then place seam-side down in casserole dish.

Continue until you have used all the meat. You should now have a full pan of rolled tortillas.

Lightly spoon remainder of sauce over the top and brush the sides so every part of the tortilla is covered with sauce, but don’t pour too much sauce (or enchiladas will be soggy). Top with remaining shredded cheese.

Bake at 350 for 10-12 minutes, or until sauce is bubbly and cheese on top is melted.

Sunny Holliday lives in Jackson with her husband and four-legged “child,” a Jack Russell terrier/corgi mix named Cotton. Sunny owns and operates an interior design business, Sunny Holliday Design, and enjoys cooking, volunteering, decorating and spending time with family. She is also a member of the Junior League of Jackson.

➺

christian commerce

by RICKY RAYBORN

Mercy and truth in the workplace Safe hiring and safe retention in faith-based organizations “All the paths of the Lord are mercy and truth to such as keep His covenant and His testimonies.” – Psalm 25:10

W

hen one thinks of the many thousands of nonprofit and/or faith-based organizations in our country, at first glance, one could be

tempted to think they are immune to legal problems related to negligent hiring or negligent retention.

Think again. Just ask the Boy Scouts of America or the Catholic church, as well as numerous other Christian mainline Protestant and non-denominational faith organizations: Negligent screening, negligent ongoing retention policies, and faulty accountability structures have produced horrific consequences. In a world where original sin continues to be alive and active, so are its consequences, and faith-based organizations are not exempt from this reality.

This reality can pose a hard question: How do faith-based organizations and their leaders live the gospel truths of charity, of being non-judgmental, of being inclusive and merciful, while protecting their assets — the most important being the young and the vulnerable they seek to serve in Christ?

Answer: Truth and mercy, inseparable goods in the eyes of the Lord, must be practiced with faithful diligence. Through diligent screening of potential hires and volunteers, a business or organization protects the truth and shows mercy to the weak and vulnerable they serve. Or as the psalmist sings, “All the paths of the Lord are mercy and truth to such as keep his covenant and His testimonies” (Psalm 25:10). And we are assured, “By mercy and truth iniquity is purged: and by the fear of the Lord men depart from evil” (Proverbs 16:6).

Faith-based organizations that serve children and youth have the obligation to exercise “due diligence.” By performing background checks on volunteers, your ministry is putting up a safeguard. Offer peace of mind to discerning parents by knowing your ministry is proactively protecting children.

Since its conception, Laborchex Inc. has been a positive force in the effort to help companies, nonprofits and faith-based organizations avoid the pitfalls of negligent hiring and negligent retentions by providing background checks

before and during employment. Here are some key concepts and maxims to keep in mind when discussing safe hiring and safe retention in faithbased organizations:

◼ When a job brings an employee into

contact with the public in a special relationship, the employer has a duty to conduct an investigation into the employee’s work experience, background, character and qualifications.

◼ From childcare volunteers and janitors

to administrators and pastors, unlawful and reprehensible acts by any of these people can cause terrible harm to faithbased organizations and significantly diminish their community standing.

◼ Faith-based organizations might also be liable if they retain employees who commit wrongs against other people if they know, or should know, that the employee does these things. Each organization has a duty to protect people from the harmful recurring behavior of an employee.

◼ Volunteers make up the backbone of

many faith-driven organizations. If you check the background of anyone, it should be volunteers and daycare workers. They are often responsible for the most precious item in our church: our children. These persons should have clear criminal records and valid driving records, since there will be times when they might drive church or personal vehicles with children aboard.

◼ Salaried employees: These include

teachers, secretaries, accounts receivable/payable workers, etc. In addition to knowing intimate personal details about members of the congregation (such as addresses and social security/checking account numbers), these workers are often entrusted with the handling of church funds, including credit cards, investment accounts and more. In addition to checking criminal records and driving records, when appropriate, previous employment and education should be verified. Employment credit reports should be obtained for applicants who will handle money or funds.

◼ From janitors and kitchen workers to

bus drivers and maintenance personnel, this category of workers requires careful screening. In addition to working with church property, these workers also have direct contact with children, and even know when a parishioner’s car is unattended. Criminal records and driving records should be checked.

Finally, drug testing would be a good idea for all employees and volunteers. Y Ricky Rayborn is president of Laborchex, a Mississippi-based company providing employment screening and drug testing services nationwide to a range of employers, from small businesses to Fortune 500 corporations. For more information, call 1-800-880-0366 or visit laborchex.com.

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➺tough questions with barb

by BARBARA MARTIN, LPC, LMFT

I’m too frustrated with my child to enjoy parenting QUESTION: It seems I am constantly frustrated with my child. I want to enjoy them, but my child’s ongoing disobedience is making this difficult. Suggestions?

B

uilding a relationship with your child, while at the same time trying to put up limits and discipline them so they will be successful adult, is indeed a challenge. As the mother of three now-

adult boys, when they were young, I well remember the exhaustion I felt in trying to be the best mom I could be, and fearing I was not doing a good enough job. Gary Landreth gives some parenting advice I wish I’d had then: “Focus on the doughnut and not the hole of the doughnut.”

How often do parents simply take time to know their child? What are their likes, fears, reasons for anger? What makes them sad, and what is it like to simply be them? How often, as parents, do we judge, interrogate, correct or simply stay in a teaching mode with our children rather than learning who they are as separate individuals from us?

I remember asking my boys as adults what I missed when they were young. My oldest said that I missed the fact that he was struggling in school, not because he was lazy but because he had ADD. My fears for him overruled me taking time to know what was going on inside of him.

My middle child said that my focus was on him being perfect in every way, so I missed understanding that he was not perfect, and showing grace in that.

My youngest said I interrogated him too much, so he feared telling me things that might have been good for him to talk about.

Instead, he feared the possible inquisition that might happen if he shared that with which he was dealing.

My curiosity about what my sons were dealing with would have been a gift in their life, but my own parenting fears and expectations kept me from expressing that well. I might have been more effective if I had 32

APRIL 2020 ❘ Mississippi Christian Living

realized the importance of focusing on the “doughnut,” the person of my child, rather than on what I thought was missing. I am not at all saying that discipline and training are not valuable, but at times I wonder if this becomes the main thing we do rather than trying to understand who our child is.

I remember hearing about a little boy who was 3 years old. A new little sister had just been born. She had pretty severe colic, so she cried often. His parents were stretched thin, trying to deal with a crying baby, their own jobs and a 3-year-old boy. They noticed he seemed to be regressing in two areas: 1) He had been potty trained early but was wetting his pants again and would stand right in front of the toilet to have a bowel movement. This was not something he had struggled with before, so they were concerned. 2) He was also not obeying as well as before. He knew the rule not to cross the street without an adult holding his hand, but he would dash across the street on his own. I asked how he was doing with his new sister. He seemed okay, they agreed, but if he got mad or appeared sad, they told him he needed to put on a smile because they were all going through a difficult time; he needed to help them manage.

What do you think might have been going

on with this little boy? He was not doing as he was told, but there were reasons he was reacting to all of these changes in this way.

His parents were doing the best they could, but somehow, they were missing the fact that their son had emotions he was dealing with, and correction alone was not solving them.

This is where the idea of emotional coaching can help. For example, “Hey son, I can see you feel sad right now. But when you are sad, you can’t run across the street without an adult. Let’s think together about other things you can do when you feel sad.”

When a parent does this, the child feels valued and known; his emotions are accepted. At the same time, he learns there are limits to behavior even when feelings are strong. Empathy is given for sadness, but also guidance in learning how to deal with strong emotions. Y

Barbara Martin, LPC, LMFT, is an adjunct professor at Reformed Theological Seminary in Jackson and the emotional care consultant for Mission to North America, a branch of the Presbyterian Church in America (PCA). She has a private practice in Ridgeland, has been married to Hal for 45 years, and has three sons and five grandchildren.

➺

money matters

by CAROLYN MCLEMORE, CRPC®, and KURT VANDE STREEK

Are you financially literate?

T

here are events throughout history that are so significant, they serve to remind us how fragile life really is. For

example, most American adults remember exactly where they were when news surfaced that the Twin Towers were attacked on the morning of September 11, 2001. Today, we are facing the Coronavirus (COVID-19) pandemic. As believers, we know and trust that God is fully in control despite how unsettling this situation may seem. “Be still and know that I am God.” – Psalm 46:10.

One ramification, however, of global events like the two mentioned above is that financial markets do not like them — hence the very swift and severe pullback experienced over the past few weeks. In addition to focusing on the physical and emotional health of our families, friends and neighbors, moments like this also remind us of the importance of financial health — a national initiative highlighted each April in the United States with National Financial Literacy Month.

Are you new to the concept of financial literacy? Financial literacy is the ability to understand and effectively apply various financial skills — including personal financial management, budgeting and investing.

Reflect for a moment if you will. Can you think of someone who had a lot of money and lost it, or someone who has never been able to financially get ahead because of poor money choices? Our hunch is it took less than five seconds to visualize a person.

Unfortunately, most people are not taught the fundamental principles of personal finance at an early age — so they find out these principles the hard way. The majority of colleges and universities still don’t offer courses in basic money management skills, and most students entering college did not benefit from financial literacy courses in high school. There’s good news, though! Organizations like the Mississippi Council on Economic Education (MCEE), and experienced financial advisors, are working to fill the “gaps” in financial education.

What are the primary ways to achieve financial literacy? They’re the same seven habits we recently shared to improve your financial health:

1. Create and track a budget monthly 2. Start funding your emergency savings 3. Develop a plan to eliminate your debt 4. Automate your retirement savings 5. Review your insurance needs annually 6. Establish a comprehensive estate plan 7. Talk with your family about money matters regularly

To comment on the important fourth habit, automating your retirement savings: The general population is familiar with the concept of investing, but are you aware that you can align your personal values with your investments?

For example, do you have a deep care and concern about climate change? If so, there’s an investment for that. Or are you opposed to industries like tobacco, gambling, and/or pornography? There are investments that can filter those industries out too. The concept of aligning your values with your investments is called values-based investing and, truth is, too few financial advisors are discussing this opportunity. We hope that changes, and we’re proud to offer valuesbased financial planning and investing with every one of our interested clients.

Before implementing the suggestions listed above, or if you’re interested in learning more about values-based financial planning and investing, consider seeking counsel from an experienced financial professional. Our team at Trustmark Financial Services would be glad to come alongside you in this endeavor, and can be reached at 769.209.4684 or 601.208.6029. Y Carolyn McLemore is a financial consultant and first vice president with Trustmark Financial Services. She and her husband, Gary, live in Brandon and are active members of First Baptist Church of Fannin. Kurt Vande Streek is a financial consultant with Trustmark Financial Services. He and his wife, Mary Ellen, live in Jackson with their two children and are active members of Redeemer Church, PCA.

mschristianliving.com ❘ APRIL 2020 33

➺quips & quotes ✂

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