FREE MAY 2011
A Special Delivery
10 HABITS
MOTHER’S DAY FOR A NEW MOM
FOR EVERY WORKING MOM
BUSY MOM’S GUIDE TO PLANNING MEALS
Motherhood One Size Does NOT Fit All
See what everyone is talking about! ✻ Fabulous Activities ✻ Beautiful Surroundings ✻ New Found Friendships ✻ Fine Dining Sunnybrook Estates is a strictly rental independent living retirement community offering spacious apartment living. Low monthly rates with NO long-term lease or buy in required. Rent includes meals, housekeeping, transportation, activities, on-site movie theatre, central heat & air in each apartment and more!
To inquire about Sunnybrook Estates
CALL 601-856-4050 2 4 8 L O C U S T L A N E • M A D I S O N , M S 3 9 11 0 2 MAY 2011 ❘ Metro Christian Living
positively caring. positively enriching. positively life-starting. positively great.
contents MAY 2011
metro ®
columns 24 HomeWorks Help for working moms
25 Modern Motherhood Froggy faith
28 Let’s Talk it Over Mad about mom
30 The Way I See It Guard your heart
31 All in the Family Kids! Here’s what your mom REALLY wants for Mother’s Day!
34 Legal Advice Role reversal: When the child becomes the parent
departments 11 Let’s Get Real Mother’s tender touch
13 From the Readers What’s the best advice your mom every gave you?
feature
20
Volume 5, Number 12 Publisher: MHS Publications, Inc., Member, M.I.P.A. Editor: Marilyn Tinnin marilyn@metrochristianliving.com Associate Editor: Christi B. Steckel christi@metrochristianliving.com Administrative Assistant: Carol Rodgers carol@metrochristianliving.com Art Direction/Graphic Design Sandra K. Goff Graphic Production Assistant Kate Thomas Sales Marilyn Tinnin, Christi B. Steckel, Heather May, Jen Sampson Contributing Writers: Lydia Bolen, Yvette Edwards Cook, John L. Cox, Susan Deaver, Cathy Haynie, William B. Howell, Molly Meeks, Bryce Mott, Robin O’Bryant, Walter Redden, Susan E. Richardson, Martin E. Willoughby Jr., Cover Photography Stegall Imagery Distribution Assistants: Laura Blackledge, Kim Roberts, Carol Rodgers, Rachel Schulte, Jerri Strickland, Priscilla Sullivan, Tim Waldon, Bob Whatley
15 Special Delivery Mother’s Day for a new mom
Motherhood
16 Christian Commerce Center
One Size Does NOT Fit All
Wright & Ferguson Funeral Home
36
17 Our Daily Bread How do you keep the faith?
19 This Is My Story Our miracle baby
32 26
11
26 Food For Thought Celebrate: Food and famly How to plan meals
29 Welcome Home Spring cleaning tips
32 Fresh Finds 35 Event Collage Jackson Prep Senior Service Day
36 Rave Reviews Books, movies and music
in every issue What’s Coming Next Month? Martin Willioughby A Father’s Priority
➺
4 MAY 2011 ❘ Metro Christian Living
6 37 38 38
Editor’s Letter Event Calendar Quips & Quotes Ad Directory
Metro Christian Living is committed to encouraging individuals in their daily lives by presenting the faith stories of others and by providing information that will point every person, at every stage of life, to a deeper, authentic, personal, and life changing encounter with Jesus Christ. Views expressed in Metro Christian Living do not necessarily represent those of the publisher. Every effort has been made by the Metro Christian Living staff to insure accuracy of the publication contents. However, we do not guarantee the accuracy of all information nor the absence of errors and omissions; hence, no responsibility can be or is assumed. All Rights Reserved. Copyright 2008 by Metro Christian Living, Inc. Scripture taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version, copyright 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of International Bible Society.
Metro Christian Living is published monthly and is available at high traffic locations throughout the metropolitan area. Copies are also available by subscription, $29 for one year. Single issues available for $3 an issue. POSTMASTER: Send change of address to Metro Christian Living, 573 Highway 51 North, Suite C, Ridgeland, MS 39157, phone number 601-790-9076.
M I P A Mississippi Independent Publishers' Alliance
'>HH>HH>EE>.G69>I>DC SINCE 1978 M I S K E L LY S . C O M
MISKELLY FURNITURE - PEARL 101 AIRPORT ROAD PEARL, MS 39208
ROOMSTORE - PEARL 4113 HWY 80 EAST PEARL, MS 39208
MISKELLY FURNITURE - MADISON 233 GRANDVIEW BLVD. MADISON, MS 39110
SLEEPSTORE - RIDGELAND 1000 HIGHLAND COLONY PKWY RIDGELAND, MS 39157
SLEEPSTORE - FLOWOOD 722 MACKENZIE LANE FLOWOOD, MS 39232
601.898.1994 (RENAISSANCE CENTER)
601.939.6288 (NEXT TO DICK’S SPORTING GOODS)
601.939.6288 • 888.939.6288
601.939.5303
601.853.6233
(NEXT TO JACKSON AIRPORT)
(NEXT TO JACKSON AIRPORT)
(NEXT TO MALCO THEATER)
➺editor’s letter Being a Mother is…a Personal Journey
M
To be on a journey ❝ with the Lord is to have the freedom to savor what he brings your way— and to see it all as a gift
❞
– Paula Rinehart
y first child was born on April 3, 1975. Like most first babies, he arrived after a very long labor—red, wrinkled, swollen—not so cute to a bystander, but he was the most wonderful gorgeous creature my eyes had ever seen. I considered him extraordinary in
every way. Five weeks later I celebrated my very first Mother’s Day. It was a huge day from my perspective. I even recall the Sunday sermon that day. Eager to become the best mother I possibly could, I was slightly uncomfortable as the lesson unfolded. The scripture was I Samuel I, the story of Hannah, the barren woman who wanted to be a mother more than anything else. She promised to give her son to God should He bless her with a baby—and He did—and she kept her promise delivering Baby Samuel to the high priest in the temple when he was little more than a toddler. I couldn’t imagine being asked to give up my son. Dr. Patterson’s point was that we should never love a gift from God more than we love the Giver Himself. I realized that finding the balance in my new role would prove more difficult than I had ever dreamed. I think it is the sheer thrill of being a vehicle in God’s amazing plan of procreation that makes it so easy to idolize our very own precious miracle. I have found, too, that I am just as tempted to make idols of my grandchildren…some lessons we have to learn again and again. The ties that bind us to our children—and grandchildren—are solid, fierce, sacrificial and impossible to sever. Those little people have a power over us that we seldom allow any other human being to have. They bring incredible joy but they have just as much ability to inflict incredible pain. It is dangerous to love anyone so much, isn’t it? I have often quoted Elizabeth Stone who said, “Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body.” But it is also in the parent child relationship, more than any other, that we come close to comprehending God’s boundless love for us. It is surely because we are created in His image that we can know the reality of such a powerful form of love. The comforting words of Romans 8:38-39 ring true: “For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.” As Paul reminds us in I Corinthians 13, Love never ends. I can’t wait for you to meet the mothers in this issue. One size truly does not fit all. I hope you are as moved as I have been by each story. There have been unique broken places for all of them, but each dear mom says with certainty that she has found God’s grace sufficient. (2 Corinthians 12:9). I love what Stephanie Bell Flynt says about living with an unpredictable disease. “MS is both the best and the worst thing that has ever happened to me.” Nobody could say that unless they have indeed come face to face with God’s sort of “upside down kingdom’ where He is able to take the impossible and redeem or restore. Metro Christian Living’s Christi Steckel is celebrating her very first Mother’s Day as mom to Chloe Anne who arrived on March 29. Take a peek at this precious bundle of joy and read her mom’s reflections in “Special Delivery.” Enjoy. We have loved putting this together and we hope you enjoy reading. I haven’t done a great job in Christi’s absence with Facebook or my blog, but I am going to do better. Visit us! Y
From Marilyn’s Bookshelf A Cord of Three Strands By Sara W. Berry and Tricia J. Robbins
Based on a true story, three women grapple with hurts, baggage, rebellion and unfulfilled dreams. Their lives intersect in a way only God could orchestrate, and the greatest failure and grief gives way to joy, forgiveness, and life beyond all they could ask, think, or imagine. God’s grace is everywhere in this story. Available on Amazon or at www.bethelroadpublications.com
6 MAY 2011 ❘ Metro Christian Living
Marilyn H. Tinnin, Publisher and Editor marilyn@metrochristianliving.com
+RQRU'XW\ /HDGHUVKLS
U LR Q H 6 S H U 3 Q R V N F D V Q R WL &RQJUDWXOD (DJOH6FRXWV
&$57(5%$51(77 0<(56&$53(17(5 -2+1)5(< -$<)8//(5 (//,277*8)),1 3+,/,3/$1( /8.(/29( 1$7+$10&1$,5 &2'<0<(56 -$&.7$</25 %(1-$0,17+20$6
*!#+3/. 02%0!2!4/29 3#(//, WWWJACKSONPREPNET *ACKSON 0REPARATORY 3CHOOL ADMITS STUDENTS OF ANY RACE COLOR AND NATIONAL OR ETHNIC ORIGIN
.OT PICTURED 0HILIP ,ANE
Odyssey Nurses have the HEART of Hospice
Celebrating National Nurses Week MAY 6-12, 2011 Here’s what our patients’ families are saying about our nurses: (quotes taken from our family satisfaction surveys) “ My dad’s nurse was great.”
➧
“They would laugh with you or cry with you.”
➧
“She was wonderful to me throughout the days of my daddy dying.”
➧
➧
“The nurses were great, a real class act.”
It takes a special person to be a hospice nurse. Interested in joining the team? Please visit www.gentiva.com to apply. 2001 Airport Road N, Suite 304 • Flowood, MS 39232
601-939-9288 metrochristianliving.com ❘ MAY 2011 9
Pack for Success! Clinton Public Schools In Clinton, we give our full attention to the formative elementary school years. Educational programs foster the academic, social and emotional growth of all children. Our dedicated teachers encourage students to make discoveries RQWKHLURZQSURYLGLQJWKHPZLWKWKHFRQÂżGHQFH they need to progress to higher levels of learning. Come see for yourself. For more information, please visit our website.
www.clintonms.org
Backyard Spa...ahh...
LANDSCAPE & MAINTENANCE County Line Rd at Pear Orchard, Ridgeland, MS
Over 55 years of service
WWWCALLAWAYSONLINECOM s 601-957-1731 10 MAY 2011 â?˜ Metro Christian Living
by WALTER REDDEN
➺
let’s get real
Mother’s TENDER TOUCH I can still hear the joyous timbre of her voice as she would sashay through the house humming her favorite hymn. Mother was also a home missionary. She did not take special courses nor did she ever receive a certificate designating her as a home missionary; but she was a missionary in our home. Some women have a space called a “sewing room.” Mother had a card table, loads of reference/study books and her Bible in her study. She taught a ladies’ Bible class for many years and, before the Bible class began at her church, Mother was the church pianist. She was not a great musician but much more than a joyful noise maker, singing (as I might) in a monotone voice. Mother was so well prepared each Sunday. The ladies would come out of Bible study laughing and smiling as each took her regular pew seat at church. Her appreciation was awarded by a lovely plaque. One thing Mother pulled out of her child psychology bag is now indelible in my mind. The method of teaching me a beautiful poem, when I was a child, is a cherished possession. The poem was placed in the corner of the mirror of our medicine cabinet. Mother never made mention of the poem. She never ever called the poem to my attention. Facing the
mirror each day, as I learned to shave, the glint of the poem is now a rather large part of me— and it is as follows:
{ }
M
other was a teacher for a halfcentury. One’s ties to the “good old days” never really disappear.
The Secret
“I met God in the morning when my day was at its best, and His presence came like sunrise, like a glory in my breast.
All day long the presence lingered, all day long HE stayed with me, And we sailed in perfect calmness o’er a very troubled sea.
So I think I know the secret, learned from many a troubled way, You must seek HIM in the morning if you want HIM through the day.” – Ralph Cushman
Walter Redden is a husband, father, grandfather and Air Force Veteran. He lives in Jackson.
metrochristianliving.com ❘ MAY 2011 11
HE A LT HC A R E f o r w o m e n b y w o m e n. • Obstetrics • Gynecology • Incontinence Testing • Infertility • Ultrasound • Bone Density • Laser for Vein & Hair Removal • Skin Rejuvenation • Digital Mammography
EAST LAKELAND OB - GYN ASSOCIATES , PA
601.936.1400 800.273.6716 The Suites at River Oaks 1020 River Oaks Drive Suite 320 Jackson, MS 39232
E A R LY DETECTION SAVES LIVES
Standing, L-R: Donna G. Breeland, M.D.; Natasha N. Hardeman, M.D.; Shani K. Meck, M.D.; Freda McKissic Bush, M.D. Seated, L-R: Mary W. (Katie) Sartin, CFNP; Temeka L. Johnson, M.D.; Missy Jackson McMinn, M.D; Rhonda Sullivan-Ford, M.D.; Sharon K. Brown, CFNP Beverly A. McMillan, M.D., Emeritus
12 MAY 2011 ❘ Metro Christian Living
➺
from our readers This month MCL asked our readers,
“WHAT’S THE BEST ADVICE YOUR MOTHER EVERY GAVE YOU?”
I am grateful for my mother’s wisdom and particularly remember her saying, “the best gift you can give your children is to love their Daddy.” – Cathy Haynie ﱦﱤ
Don’t put anything in writing that you don’t want to have held against you later. This was before e-mail and Internet and Mom was waaaay ahead of her time! – Serena Torkelson ﱦﱤ
To put God first in everything that I do. – Kristen Ley ﱦﱤ
Read!
– Susan Richardson
Simple and reliable has always been a good way to go.
ﱦﱤ
If you look around you will always find someone taller, shorter, skinnier, fatter, smarter, dumber, richer, and poorer than you.. so don’t look around at everybody else, just be you! – Heather May ﱦﱤ
Your glass is always half-full–never half-empty. – Susan Deaver ﱦﱤ
Just be your ole sweet self! Also, be good everywhere you go, ‘cause you’re gonna run into somebody you know OR somebody who knows me! – Rhonda Walker Parker
At Regions, we know our customers want a banking experience that’s personal, helpful and secure. And when you bank with us, that’s exactly what you’ll get. We’re dedicated to sound banking practices that are effective in any environment – so you can reach for your goals with more peace of mind. Most of all, we’re dedicated to putting you first. Come see what over 8 million customers across 16 states have already discovered – with Regions, it’s time to expect more.
ﱦﱤ
Everyone has obstacles to overcome and that overcoming adversity is what makes one a better and stronger person. Learn to recognize that everyone is struggling with something (even those who seem to have it all together), so he or she should be treated with understanding. Another way of thinking about that is to realize that God is blessing us and molding us in ways that we don’t understand when times seem difficult. – Martin E. Willoughby, Jr.
1.800.regions | regions.com © 2011 Regions Bank.
metrochristianliving.com ❘ MAY 2011 13
O! How Cute
GIFT MARKET
Take a look at the difference a Christ-centered education can make! Learn more at our new website www.christcovenantschool.net
Where you’ll see how cute graduating really can be DOWNTOWN BRANDON 601-825-5080
PEARL
601-939-5082
752 Pear Orchard Road Ridgeland, Mississippi 39157
601-978-2272 Preschool-Middle School
Promise Kids of Christ Convenant Sch
providing all of your life insurance needs
Because life insurance isn’t for the people who die— It’s for the people they leave behind.
Southern Farm Bureau Life Insurance Company P.O. Box 78 Jackson, MS 39205 (601) 981-7422 • sfbli.com 14 MAY 2011 ❘ Metro Christian Living
by CHRISTI B. STECKEL
➺
special delivery
Mother’s Day
B EYOND Y OUR B EST .
FOR A NEW MOM
W
hat do you call someone who is happy to change a full diaper, sleeps in 2.5 hour intervals and whose heart grows bigger by the ounce? A new mom. That is my current title since giving birth to the sweetest little girl I know, my daughter Chloe Anne. On March 29th my husband and I had our weekly doctor appointment. Everything seemed to be routine until the doctor asked us to sit in her office. We hadn’t been in there before so we knew something was up. The doctor came in and simply said, “You’re going to have a baby today.” My immediate response? Tears. I mean sure you can say, “You need to get a haircut today,” but the whole “You’re going to have a baby today—” Now, that is life changing! We gathered our emotions and left the room to call our parents and begin our new journey. Hours later we welcomed a petite package that took our breath away. She was beautiful, perfect and sweet. Her parents were overwhelmed, stunned and joyful. We had done this. We created this little person! What a blessing. What an honor. What a responsibility. In the weeks since, the reality has set in that this little girl is completely and solely dependent on us to feed her, bath her, clothe her and ultimately just love her. That reality has also influenced my faith. I have learned I must whole-heartedly trust the Lord to take care of me in the same way; to simply, “Let Go and Let God”. Pre-baby my prayers were me-focused, “I want, I need, Lord give me, provide this...” I was missing the point. I don’t know best. I’m really an infant who needs provision and guidance. Now, during the quiet moments in the middle of the night when my only concern is providing nutrition for this little girl, I sit and listen. I don’t voice my thoughts or needs. I don’t think about the uncertainty of the future or let my mind wander. For the first time, this multi-tasker, overly organized new
mom does nothing. I’m allowing my spiritual walk to mimic my new lifestyle; steady and peaceful. It’s a wonderful thing. Even changing diapers that are colors of the rainbow are wonderful! I adore watching her raise her arms high to embrace her new world. I love when she gives me a secret side smile and throws me her pirate eye to make sure she isn’t missing anything. She is already showing signs of waking up like her mom…not pleasant, but she’s quickly soothed by food…also like her mom! Sure each day seems to take on a repeated routine, but I wouldn’t change anything because I know this time will go by quickly. Before I know it she’ll be raising those arms to hug me as she heads off to college…oh I can’t go there. For now, I continue to catch myself staring at this beautiful miracle and tears begin to form (hey, hormones happen). Chloe has become my world. Her whimpers make my heart jump and her cries make it break. No book or class could have prepared me for this new role as Mom. It’s challenging, yet rewarding. She makes me so proud and she’s not even six weeks old yet! Who knew someone so tiny could make your heart so big? This month I celebrate my first Mother’s Day. Before I’ve always thought of it as a day to show thanks to my own mother, but now I’m the mom and I realize I’m the one who is thankful. I get to be Chloe’s mom! Her daddy and I have a big job ahead of us, but we’re ready for the assignment of our lives. We pray over her throughout the day, that her soul will be filled with the grace of our Lord. That she will have a heart of service, love unconditionally, and live with eternal compassion. As I hold the precious prize I sit in awe of the Lord’s gift on this special Mother’s Day. Y Christi B. Steckel is the Associate Editor of Metro Christian Living.
Excel beyond your highest goals. At Belhaven University, you will find yourself in a place where top-rated faculty and a nurturing environment converge to bring you to your best … then propel you beyond what you believe is achievable. Nationally recognized academics. Vibrant campus life. Christ-centered worldview. The faith-affirming support to become more. Aim for excellence from God’s perspective. Visit Belhaven University … your place to discover your purpose.
belhaven.edu Schedule a personal visit to Belhaven University or attend our next Discover Day on April 15.
metrochristianliving.com ❘ MAY 2011 15
➺christian commerce corner by CHRISTI B. STECKEL
ELLIS WRIGHT
Wright & Ferguson Funeral Home What are your keys to a successful business? My Grandfather and my father always said to conduct business with people on a higher plane. That has always stuck with me and I believe it is the key to being successful.
Established in 1923, Wright & Ferguson is Jackson’s oldest and most experienced funeral home. Operated with by family values and faith, Wright & Ferguson is dedicated to providing quality service and value to metro area families. MCL caught up with Ellis Wright and asked him about the family business.
16 MAY 2011 ❘ Metro Christian Living
How do you employ your Christian faith in the workplace? This is probably best answered in the first question. I also try and take opportunities to discuss my faith with others. I have also had the opportunity to see great faith exhibited by families and I try and share these experiences. What type of influence do you hope to make in the business community? I would hope that I would leave a strong Christian influence, but I like Paul sometimes do what I don’t want to do and what I do is not what I want.
What is the most important part of your job? Building relationships. It is key for people to know you, to trust you and to believe in you. What has been your role over the years as business man and son? My family continues to manage the business so my role has changed some, but most of what we did as a family owned business we still do today and that is to build those relationships and to try and provide service that goes beyond expectations. Ellis Wright has been married to Jamie Roberts Wright for almost 32 years. They have three children;Lori Stringer (Eric) 29, Michael Wright 26, and John Wright, II 21. Ellis attended Ole Miss and graduated from Dallas Institute for Mortuary Science. His son Michael has now joined the funeral home as 4th generation. You can reach Wright & Ferguson at 601-352-3632. Y
by SUSAN DEAVER
âžş
our daily bread
How Do You Keep The
FAITH? T
his column is for sharing our faith with other readers. Sharing with and serving others changes us and reminds us that our time on earth is about much more than our own needs. To share your story or favorite scripture, please e-mail us at info@metrochristianliving.com.
Melanie Hanlin I am absolutely amazed how personal the Lord is. At a time in my life when I felt as though my world had crumpled around my feet, He stood right there to keep me strong and assured me that He was in control of my situation. In 2004, after almost sixteen years of marriage, I found myself facing a divorce— how could this be happening? At the time, my daughter was fourteen and already struggling as a teenager to find her place and to belong. The only thing I knew to do was to keep on keeping on...and don’t look back. At every turn, during the long months that ensued before the divorce became final in 2007, the Lord was right there to strengthen me when I needed strength and calm me when I needed to be calmed. From the very beginning I prayed, for direction and wisdom, and most of all for help to be the mother I needed to be for my daughter through this rough time. Now fast forward 4 years later – my daughter and I are stronger in our faith, because we know where true strength comes from and this trial has actually made us better as opposed to bitter.
Natalie Hanlin When I heard my Dad say the word “divorce,� the only question going through my mind was, “How could this happen to me?� After a few months, I realized that this situation was the result of bad choices and God would have to help me with this test. I was fourteen years old, and a thousand questions raced through my mind. Even now, some of those questions do not have answers. Since that time, God has allowed me to help other young people in my youth group who have faced the same obstacles. Not only has this trial made me a stronger person, but it has also made my Mother and me closer than ever. More importantly, I have a much closer relationship with God and I know that He will take care of me no matter what comes my way. When I am in a situation I don’t understand, I know He is in control and is working for my good. I know I can trust Him.
0 8980 8980 8980
Melanie and Natalie Hanlin are mother and daughter. They live in Byram and are members of the First Pentecostal Church in Byram. Y
Chapman's FLORIST AT C O L L E G E C R O S S I N G
“Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves.� – Romans 12:10
0 8980 8980 8980 +Z\(6WH‡3HDUO06 ‡ ZZZFKDSPDQVIORULVWFRP <RXFDQILQGXVRQ)DFHERRN metrochristianliving.com � MAY 2011 17
We’ve got great gifts for Moms and Grads! LifeWay Exclusive
$9.99 SALE
Believing God’s Word Day by Day
Dear Graduate
Save 33% Beth Moore
Save 50%
Charles R. Swindoll Imitation Leather 005442877 Reg. $19.99
10
HB 005150985 Reg. $14.99
$
off
YOUR TOTAL PURCHASE OF $35 OR MORE VALID 5/65/21/11
ONLY $9.99
2011 Plush Owl LifeWay Exclusive 005431051
Valid at the Jackson, Miss., LifeWay Christian Store only. One coupon per customer. Coupon must be presented and relinquished at time of purchase. Cannot be combined with any other discounts, including coupons, Savings Cards, Bonus Bucks, and LifeWay Rewards. Available on in-stock items only. Cannot be applied to the following: gift cards, church supplies and programs, NAMB, WMU, Convention Press, LifeWay-branded products, Living Proof Ministries, Bargain Buys, prior purchases, Willow Tree® products, LOGOs & BibleWorks Software, Specialty Imprints, textbooks, robes, pre-sell offers, and homeschool products.
C12039
$9.99 SALE
Jackson, Miss., LifeWay Christian Store
Located in the Ridgewood Court Shopping Center OFYUUP#FTU#VZt601.977.9676
JINGLE COINSpreferred. J I N G L E C O I N G I F T C E RT I F I C AT E S . W i t h o v e r 4 6 s h o p s & r e s t a u r a n t s t o c h o o s e f r o m , i t ’s t h e P E R F E C T G I F T f o r a n y o n e . M O T H E R ’ S D AY GRADUATION WEDDINGS B I R T H D AY S F A T H E R ’ S D AY
18 MAY 2011 ❘ Metro Christian Living
I-55 North at Northside Drive, Exit 100 www.highlandvillagems.com www.facebook.com/highlandvillagems twitter.com/HVMississippi Shops open Mon-Sat 10A-6P Restaurant hours may vary
by YVETTE EDWARDS COOK
➺
this is my story
Our Miracle Baby hip and I were thrilled to learn on December 31, 2008, that I was pregnant with our second child. It was to be anything but a normal pregnancy. God was going to test our faith and dependence on Him in a way we had never been tested before. From the very beginning, I was anxious about this pregnancy. At my first appointment, it was confirmed that I was pregnant, but there was no heartbeat. After waiting a week for another sonogram, a heartbeat was detected and we breathed a sigh of relief. At my routine twenty week sonogram, it was discovered that our baby had a condition called CDH (Congenital Diaphragmatic Hernia). This means there was a hole in the diaphragm that never fully closed during development. The stomach was developing in the chest cavity. My doctor recommended we see a specialist and proceed from there. The specialist spotted a cleft lip in addition to the hernia and gave us a less than 5% chance of survival. In his opinion, a decision to terminate, given this diagnosis, might be in everyone’s best interest and no one could fault us if we made this decision. We left the doctor’s office devastated but firm in our resolve that this was God’s child no matter the outcome. We immediately wanted to know boy or girl and name our baby because in the womb could be our only chance to know him. So began the prayers for John Tucker Cook. We were referred to Cincinnati Children’s Hospital. Our odds got a little better—about 40%. We were given a plan of action and made our move to Cincinnati, Ohio, in July. On August 31, 2009, John Tucker entered the world with 5 1/2 organs in his chest cavity (stomach, large and small intestine, spleen, liver and part of the left kidney). It was now time for him to begin the fight for his life. We had committed this child to God from the very beginning and as much as anyone can in this type of situation, were prepared for whatever the outcome God intended. As expected, John Tucker had good days and bad days. We praised God for the good times and felt the complete peace of being so close to Him when John Tucker had setbacks. Each day at rounds, we would ask the doctors specific things for which we needed to pray. We felt like they were looking at us as if we truly didn’t understand the enormity of the situation, “one of the sickest babies at Children’s when he arrived”. On the contrary, we wanted them to understand we had
C
Yvette, John Tucker, Wen and Chip Cook.
faith in what they were doing, but the ultimate faith in what God was doing! Once his numbers were in the required range, surgery was scheduled immediately. The next day, September 18th, he had his repair surgery. I loved what one of my friends wrote on our Care pages that morning, “Imagine the number of angels being summoned to Children’s Hospital this morning on behalf of John Tucker.” Wow, what a visual! Surgery went well and he did great. John Tucker was weaned off the ventilator and put on oxygen thru a nasal cannula. This too was removed after only one day. He went to room air and has never looked back. The next big step was teaching him the concept of suck, swallow, and breathe. Many of these kids have an aversion to things in and around their mouth. It’s no wonder. For weeks, there were 3 tubes going down his throat— ventilator in one nostril, feeding tube in the other, and the replogle used to suction going through the mouth. Needless to say, we were so proud of him and how he did with the bottle. At the time of discharge, he was taking the majority of his feeding from the bottle alone. On day 78 of life, we were discharged to home and he has sailed ever since. With each passing day, we realize more and more that even as severe as he was, he is atypical of CDH babies. Our prayer is that God would be honored above all else on our journey. He continues to bless us and we are so proud to have been given the privilege of raising John Tucker. We wouldn’t have chosen this path, but now would not change a thing for the Truth that we have learned along the way. We are humbled by the grace and mercy God, our Father, has shown us. Y Yvette Cook is a Madison resident and the mother of two precious boys. She is a certified professional tennis instructor and enjoys outdoor activities with her boys in her spare time. metrochristianliving.com ❘ MAY 2011 19
Motherhood One Size Does NOT Fit All by MARILYN TINNIN and ROBIN O’BRYANT
Metro Christian Living cheers for mothers this month. Meet a few of our favorite leading ladies whose diverse journeys as mothers inspire us and honor the God who gave them the privilege of being someone’s mom!
————
Stephanie Hopkins Age: 30 Church Affiliation Pilgrim Rest Missionary Baptist Church Madison
A
s a young single mother, Stephanie juggles being a full-time mom to Andrew, a 7th grader at Olde Town Middle School in Ridgeland and being a full-time Senior Corporate Communication Specialist at Southern Farm Bureau Life Insurance Company. Before the school year began, she realized the whirl of extra-curricular activities was about to accelerate. Andrew is involved in most everything from band to crosscountry, football, basketball and baseball. Like most moms, she wants to be there when her son dons a uniform of any kind! “At the beginning of the school year, I prayed that the Lord would allow me to be there for all of my son’s activities without interference.” Interference could come in the form of a crisis at work or an unexpected meeting that she could not miss. Amazingly, there were no interferences this past year!
20 MAY 2011 ❘ Metro Christian Living
Stephanie considers herself fortunate in her job situation explaining, “I’ve been blessed to have a job that I love and an employer that emphasizes the importance of family.” For Stephanie there has never been a period in her motherhood journey when she was without a challenge of one kind or the other, but at this stage of the game as her son moves from childhood to adolescence she says the challenges are more intense. “I want my Christian walk to be very influential when it comes to my son.” She says she is always in all ways concerned about how she is perceived by him. Take for example the issue of dating. It is a serious concern for her because any date for her is a potential father to her son and that sets the standards very very high! “As a young parent, I try my best to relate and be very understanding of this stage of life. I know I don’t have all the answers to life’s challenges, but I want my son to know who to look towards if those challenges become overwhelming…God.” Stephanie does not have to look too far for inspiration in her daily walk with the Lord. Her own mother, Linda, has been a consistent strong role model for her daughter. “By observing how she handles situations and how she looks to the Lord in all the decisions she makes, she inspires me to do the same,” Stephanie says. “As a child she preached Romans 8:28 to us.” (All things work together for good to those who love God and are called according to His purpose). “Good or bad, I know that in the end, God will be glorified.” And that is exactly her desire wherever the journey takes her. Being the bread-winner, the career lady, the mom, and the spiritual leader is a lot for a 30 year-old, but Stephanie quotes one of her favorite scriptures and smiles. “For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.” (2 Timothy 1:7) Methinks Andrew is going to be just fine.
Stephanie Bell Flynt Age: 48 Church Affiliation Pinelake Church
I
t’s hard to believe that the very young and pretty girl who comes into our homes as the familiar WLBT Noon Anchor and Medical Matters reporter is “Mom” to four sons, ages 22, 17, 14, and 12. It’s even harder to believe that behind that ready smile and upbeat personality is a person who battles Multiple Sclerosis (MS). Stephanie Bell Flynt’s life story sounds idyllic as she describes growing up in Gloster, one of four children in a close-knit family. She describes “a kind of peace that practically raises you in the Lord…To us, it really was God’s country and we were God’s children living in His land.” After graduation from MSU in 1984, she moved to Jackson, married her husband Mike, and they established their early priorities (1 to find a church home and (2 to start a family. Four sons later, she and Mike refer to their family as “the tribe.” Stephanie says, “One of God’s biggest blessings to me as a mother, is my husband, who is an outstanding father. In addition to that, Mike has consciously made every effort to enhance the joy of motherhood for me. Such love makes motherhood a full-bodied experience for me, and my love for my husband and my children absolutely over-flows from my soul.” With a demanding but fulfilling career in broadcast news, Stephanie
seemed to have it all – the precious family and the perfect job. Then came a diagnosis of MS in 2004, something she describes as “both the worst and best thing that’s ever happened to me. My initial reaction to being diagnosed with MS was relief. Finally, I knew what had been wrong all these years of going from doctor to doctor. Shortly after that, though, fear sat in my soul like a plague. I became consumed by the ‘what if’s.” Stephanie took a step back and knew it was time to dig in deeper to the faith she had always claimed she professed. She began to look up passages to reinforce her “head knowledge.” Even though so many of those passages were familiar, she “hadn’t fully embraced them in my heart.” Ultimately she came to describe fear as a “stride breaker,” interfering with her walk with the Lord. Prayer and more prayer. Scripture and more scripture. One of her key verses became Psalm 56: 3, 4: “When I am afraid, I will trust in you. In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I will not be afraid. What can mortal man do to me?” Such an intentional endeavor on her part meant that the burden that was fear finally lifted. There is a spiritual depth that Stephanie might not have discovered apart from having to lean hard on God’s strength in her weakness. “For me the diagnosis of MS has given me a confidence in my faith that I didn’t have before,” she says. “I used to be very sensitive about how others viewed me in my faith. My faith and my strength are built on God’s word. It is now my relationship with Christ that matters most to me. It’s a bond that is ours alone, one that can’t be inspected or violated by anyone filled with darkness.” How has her illness affected her children? Stephanie says that one of her first thoughts upon hearing her diagnosis was “What will they think?” Would she be in a wheel chair or would she walk with a cane? Would her children be stigmatized by her disease? “I way over-thought this one,” she says. Her children don’t know any difference. A reporter once asked one of her sons what it was like to have a mom with MS. He said it is no big deal. “She’s just a mom, like anybody else’s mom.” Stephanie is also a mom who lives in the moment and says, “I am enjoying every little and big thing that makes my husband and children happy.” “If you truly put your trust in God and His plan for your life, not your plan, but His, you can go about the business of doing what God put you on this earth to do.” And that is precisely what Stephanie Bell Flynt does each and every day.
————
Shirley Windham Age: 58 Church Affiliation First Presbyterian Church Jackson
W
hen Shirley Windham was busy raising three little girls, she was the quintessential seamstress, housekeeper, chauffeur, tutor, plumber, hair stylist, and cook. Whether she was whipping up a meal or hand sewing with lace and entredeux, Shirley’s imagination and creativity have always defined everything she did. She was never bored as a stay-at-home mom and she delighted in introducing
Bunny, Mary Kelly, and Erin to the joys of great books and great music. “There never was any doubt in my mind or heart that the Lord had made me primarily to be a wife and mother,” she says. “And the sweet part about that now is that my role has generally shifted to that of encourager, counselor, friend and prayer partner for my three daughters as they wife and mother.” Her daughters have blessed Shirley and husband Mark with seven grandchildren. Just as Shirley was intentional about the way she parented, she is just as intentional about her role as “Grammy.” “No one really talks about preparing for grandparenthood. Now that I have nearly ten years of experience it’s becoming clearer to me that I’ve been given great opportunity to help my seven grandchildren learn to be faithful to honor and obey their parents.” Somehow she keeps that thought always in the back of her mind even as she and the grandchildren are up to such antics as sitting in the middle of the kitchen floor with a big bowl of strawberries and a can of Redi-Whip laughing as they squirt “big hair” on the berries just before devouring them. Like most grandmothers, she is thankful to be a part of their lives. What does she want her legacy to them to be? “If I had to choose one message to send to them it would be this from Deuteronomy 29:19,20 as God uses Moses to tell the children of Israel: ‘I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing; therefore, choose life, that both you and your metrochristianliving.com ❘ MAY 2011 21
descendents may live, that you may love the Lord your God, that you may obey His voice, and that you may cling to Him, for He is your life and the length of your days, that you may dwell in the land that he swore to your fathers.’ I want my grandchildren one day to meet me in heaven so that we’ll together see the King of Glory dwelling in the land He promised our fathers.” Shirley has long been a serious student of scripture. That knowledge opened the way to extending her mothering skills into her church community. As part of a team of her peers, she teaches the weekly MOMS bible study. Started over 30 years ago, an average of 150 young mothers meet together to study books of the bible as well as topics that rotate through marriage, parenting, and discipleship. This has been an unexpected lagniappe for her and she calls it a “joy and a privilege to be
invited into the life of another believer” as a friend and mentor. Just this past year, this grandmother who babysits regularly, still sews original couture for her granddaughters, and spends one day a week working on her lesson for the Moms study, began a blog, Runs with Scissors, (www.swrunswithscissors.blogspot.com) which has become a ministry of sorts. With everything from book reviews, ideas for sewing or cooking projects, and summaries of some of the MOMS lessons, the blog has become an opportunity to encourage young moms as well as to cause someone to consider the life and work of Christ in a very nonthreatening way. Slowing down and preparing for the golden years? No way. As long as God gives her breath, Shirley Windham, Mother Extraordinaire is going to be serving her King.
————
SashaClarke Age: 40 Church Affiliation Pear Orchard Presbyterian Ridgeland
F
or Sasha Clark life has been a series of major adjustments. She was a Russian physician who met her husband Joel, when he was admitted to the Moscow hospital where Sasha practiced neuro radiology. She was 26. He was 42. They fell in love. She spoke little English. He spoke little Russian although he did learn his proposal speech in Russian! Her father was a high government official in the Communist Party. Although his father had been an Orthodox priest, Sasha’s father embraced Atheism and desired the same for his family. Sasha had a devout Christian maternal grandmother who, from the time Sasha was a little girl, had made it her mission to take Sasha to church, to read scripture with her, and to pray with her. All through medical school when her professors ridiculed Christian belief, she embraced her grandmother’s faith in her heart knowing she could not do it publicly. Two weeks after they met, Joel asked Sasha to marry him. She was smitten with this American. It was unheard of, to apply and get a Visa the same day, but she did. Joel had a friend in the Radiology Department at UMC who invited Sasha to Jackson as part of an exchange program. Sasha credits Joel, who was a strong and outspoken Christian, for helping her “get where she needed to be” in her relationship with the Lord. He was also instrumental in her Atheist father coming to faith in Christ a few years later. The Clarkes were married for four years when their son Daniel was born. It had been a difficult pregnancy and there was a short-lived sigh of relief when he arrived simply because they had wanted a baby from the beginning of their marriage. Several hours later the doctors told the Clarkes that their son had a heart defect and it was quite serious. At five months Sasha and Joel handed their son over to a team of doctors at
22 MAY 2011 ❘ Metro Christian Living
Philadelphia Children’s Hospital. Sasha remembers this as a milestone in her faith journey. In many ways she was angry with God who had uprooted her from everything familiar, planted her in a new culture, finally given her a baby and then allowed him to be so fragile that his life was in jeopardy. But she prayed. As she prayed harder than she had ever prayed before on the morning of Daniel’s surgery, she relinquished her son to whatever God ordained but prayed that if God saw fit to spare Daniel He would make the surgery brief as she had read much about the length of such surgery causing brain damage. The hours passed and Sasha’s sense of peace began to give way to angst and doubt and fear. Joel’s faith did not wane. He was the calm steady presence. At last the word came. Daniel had come through the surgery, and, by the way, the surgery had been brief although no one had come to tell the Clarkes it was over. God’s faithfulness overwhelmed Sasha as she held her baby boy. Today, at age 10, you would never know Daniel had had a sick day in his life. Baby John was born five years later and life was good, but the economy was not. Then Joel’s father, who had lived with Joel and Sasha for several years and who had been such a role model for both of them passed away. Joel was devastated, overwhelmed and slipped into a depression that seemed to engulf every part of him. On December 18, 2009, he drove to his store on Lakeland Drive and took his life. Who can completely explain how depression works. For Sasha, she knows that Joel’s relationship with Christ was real…real enough to have moved her to a new level of relationship with God, real enough to have caused both her mother and her father to profess Christ in their communist country. She had many questions, but not about Joel’s faith or his destination. When the fog lifted she faced her future and the future of her sons. This brave lady thought about returning to Russia but ultimately decided to stay right where she is. She also thought about re-entering the medical field, but she says, “God shut every door.” She has reopened Joel’s store on Lakeland Drive and it is now Joel Clarke and Sons…sons who are ten and five but whom Sasha feels need to know the field their father and grandfather so loved. Being a jeweler was more than just a job for them. They knew their customers and delighted in sharing the happiest moments of life with them. And for Sasha these days, her joy is in her relationship with the Lord, the fellowship of her very supportive church family, and in the realization that she gets to be MOM to Daniel and John. She will likely have a few questions for God when she gets to the Pearly Gates one day, but in the meantime, she has a full heart and a certain faith in His ability to meet her at the point of her need.
Quiana Franks Age: 32 Church Affiliation Westminster Presbyterian Greenwood, Mississippi
Q
uiana Franks grew up in Tchula, Mississippi, in a single parent home where she was sexually abused by her brother from the time she was six-years-old until her early teens. As many children who are abused do, she became sexually active at an early age and became pregnant at thirteen. By the young age of fourteen Quiana was a mother. She finished high school with honors but Quiana wasn’t happy. After high school she started living on the edge. Her body was covered in piercings and she carried a gun. She moved to Atlanta to live with her boyfriend who happened to be a married man. Even though she was pursuing all the wrong things, her life seemed to be moving along just fine until several events transpired within ten short days that brought her to her knees. She lost her job, then, an argument with her boyfriend escalated and Quiana found herself in Cook County Jail for three days. Quiana headed back to the Delta to spend some time with her mother and child. As soon as she got home her car was repossessed. She had no car, no job and no life left in Atlanta. Everything in her life seemed broken and after finding her way back to Georgia to collect her things, she found herself alone on her bed, with a loaded gun in her hand. Life had been hard and Quiana could see no reason to live. She hated
her life and the pain it had caused her. “This,” she says, “is where God stepped in. Jesus massaged my heart that night and took away my desire to end my life. I cried myself to sleep. I woke up the next morning with the gun in my hand and I was glad I hadn’t killed myself. I still hated my life, but I no longer wanted to end it. God had taken that from me.” She sat on her bed the next morning, she lifted her head to the heavens and prayed, “God if you are real, I’ll hang with you. I’m going to give you a chance to show me you are real. If you don’t, that’s it. I’m ending it.” Quiana went home to her mother and daughter. She purchased a Bible she could read and understand and dove in. “I couldn’t believe what I was reading! I would read a passage and think, ‘Is this in everybody’s Bible?’” God began to come alive to her. She found herself being drawn deeper and deeper into his Word and had a hard time putting it down. After a year of filling herself with The Word, she was discovered by YoungLife, a non-denominational youth group for teens. YoungLife is predominantly in white suburban areas but they were looking for someone to help them reach the urban youth of the Delta and Quiana was a perfect fit. She spent the next nine years on staff with YoungLife and began working with kids who were exactly where she once was. She even had the opportunity to lead her brother, her abuser, to the Lord. God had completely transformed her life. After being a single mom for almost a decade, Quiana married her husband Paul two years ago. They own their own business and her daughter is now 17-years-old, an excellent student and exceptional athlete. Last year Quiana changed her status with YoungLife from “Staff” to “Volunteer.” Instead of leading a YoungLife group, she is pioneering a YoungLives group in Greenwood. YoungLives is a branch of Young Life, designed specifically for mentoring teen moms. Quiana’s goal with YoungLives is to show these girls that life doesn’t end with an unplanned pregnancy. Quiana and her team of mentor moms are committing to walking beside these girls, to guide them through motherhood, and to hopefully keep them from making the same detours she made. For more information about YoungLives you can contact Quiana at deltaurban@aol.com or write to YoungLives Greenwood PO Box 337 Greenwood, MS 38935. Y
————
◗ Featuring the new multifocal contact lenses for distance and near vision
OPTOMETRIST
◗ Diagnosis and treatment of ocular disease ◗ Comprehensive eye examinations with glasses prescription
601-991-3939 Tuesday–Friday 9 am - 6 pm Monday and Saturday 9 am - 5 pm
◗ We welcome hard to fit contact lens patients $20 fit rebate on your eye exam and/or fitting fee with the purchase of (2) 6-packs of Air Optix Night & Day Aqua contact lens. Additional quantity purchase rebate can be combined with fit rebate $30 on (4) 6-packs of Air Optix Night & Day Aqua contact lenses.
WE ACCEPT ALWAYS VISION, DAVIS VISION, TRICARE, MEDICARE, AND WINSOR Located in North Park Mall next to Dillard’s for Men metrochristianliving.com ❘ MAY 2011 23
➺homeworks by CATHY HAYNIE
10 HABITS
FOR EVERY WORKING MOM Balancing your family, your home, and your job is a constant challenge. Habits like these can make a real difference in not only your effectiveness, but also your peace of mind.
When you walk through the door at the end of the day say, “hello,” not, “who made this mess?!” – Julie Morgenstern
1.
Refine your family’s evening routine to set the stage for smoother mornings. Packing lunches and book bags, laying out clothes, reviewing tomorrow’s schedule, making dinner decisions for tomorrow’s evening meal, and even getting small tasks done toward tomorrow’s breakfast are all deal makers for a better morning. Setting up the coffee pot may be the extent of your current routine but going so far as to fill the blender for a breakfast smoothy or filling a tea kettle for a cup of hot cereal saves you valuable time in the morning. Make it your goal to do everything tonight that can be done for tomorrow.
2.
Use a crock-pot. There are so many reasons to develop this habit— no one ever said at 5:00pm, “I think I’ll use my crock-pot to cook a roast for supper tonight.” Using a crock-pot provides the discipline of making dinner decisions early. It also gives you a little perk when you walk through the door at the end of the day, the aroma of dinner! That end of the day time is probably not your best time of day, so why wait to make your plans for dinner?
6.
Adopt one system to track your calendar, contacts, and to do list. Having several calendars and different systems for home and work is not very effective. Technology makes it easier than ever to sync home and work schedules, and you can press print if you want it on a family bulletin board!
7.
Have one home to work bag. A first grade teacher friend called it the “there and back again bag.” Organizing one bag helps simplify things and assures you’ll have what you need. Changing book bags often led my then third grader to forgotten homework or no pencils for class. The same applies to adults. Stick with the same one for long periods of time and you’ll have what you need. Take it a step further by keeping permanent items in one part of the bag—things that always stay in there— pens, a calculator, note pad, an umbrella. Designate another part of the bag for in and out items like files or your lunch.
8.
3.
Be an early riser. Pushing the snooze button till the last possible minute is sure to set you up for a rushed morning. Getting up before your children and in time for a cup of coffee, a quiet time, or a morning walk is a better approach and helps you achieve more goals than just a less rushed morning.
Engage in a little night work. When you work outside of the home, evenings can’t be all about relaxing. Taking the time to do a load of laundry, get ready for tomorrow, or straighten up the house are just part of your reality. Setting a little time aside for just that is helpful. If you have work tasks to complete, like grading papers or preparing for a meeting, set aside adequate time and pair it with something relaxing, like music or hot tea. Not isolating yourself from your family while you engage in a little night work is also important.
4.
9.
5.
10.
Rethink your errands. Rather than making Saturdays your day to do errands in already crowded stores and parking lots, try small changes like one errand a day, a lunch hour dedicated to errands, or utilizing services like a mail order pharmacy and dry cleaning delivery.
Relax your standards. If you are striving for perfection in your home, it’s time for a reality check. Such pressure results in nothing but stress and strained relationships. So there are shoes on the floor and glasses in the sink, the sheets haven’t been changed in two weeks, and who knows when the oven was last cleaned, but are you enjoying your family, your home, your marriage, and your work? Do what you can but realize that lowering the bar just a bit can make life much more enjoyable for everyone, even you.
Take all the help you can get. Whether it’s kids helping with chores, outside help with housework or yard work, or just a drive through pharmacy, find little helps and big helps along the way. A working mom cannot do everything on her own. Whether you have a heart-to-heart with those you love or commit financially to some form of help, any help is progress. Use time off strategically. If you get a one day vacation from work, use it for rejuvenation. Sleep later, see a movie, or do something you enjoy and can’t normally do on a workday. If you have more than one day off from work, try saving time to catch up your to do list. Whether you cook meals ahead or clean out a closet, a couple of days off from work can be both rejuvenating and effective for managing your home.
Y
Cathy Haynie and her husband Jack have three children and live in Madison. Cathy is the Headmaster of Christ Covenant School in Ridgeland. She occasionally speaks to groups on Honoring God in the Home, Managing the Busy Life, and Balancing Work and Home. Contact her at chaynie@christcovenantschool.net. 24 MAY 2011 ❘ Metro Christian Living
modern motherhood by ROBIN O’BRYANT
Froggy FAITH NO PRAYER TOO SMALL When Aubrey was four-years-old, she caught the tiniest frog right outside our front door. We put the penny-sized frog in a Mason jar and poked holes in the lid. I wondered if we could keep him alive for twenty-four hours. Aubrey’s class was learning about the letter “F” and the following day was ‘Show and Tell’. If we could keep this frog alive Aubrey would be the most popular kid in her class and I could secure my Mother of the Year nomination. I wanted to help her become the “it girl” in her class but I was wary of my ability to sustain his little life for an entire twenty-four hours. “Aubrey, we are going to have to let him go. He’ll die without food.” “But MOMMA! I will feed him!” “Honey, I don’t even know what he eats…” “He eats BUGS, Momma! And his name is Fred.” She sighed at my ignorance. Obviously frogs eat bugs, but I had no idea where I was supposed to find bugs small enough to feed Fred. The average housefly was half his size. As the day went on, Aubrey pushed Fred and his Mason jar in her baby doll stroller, spun him around in our office chair, and I even found her hiding under the sheets in her bed with the jar unscrewed “tickling his belly.” We have never had pets and Aubrey was overjoyed to have something to be in charge of. After a particularly precarious jump from her bed to her sister’s bed with Fred’s jar clutched under her arm, I thought he was a goner. He was still, very still. Too still. “Aubrey, you have to be SO careful, he is just a tiny little guy and you scared him!” She didn’t miss a beat. She peered into the jar and quoted 2 Timothy 1:7, “God hasssth not given you a ssthpirit of fear but power, love and a sssthound mind! God is with you, do not be afraid!!” (We say this verse at night sometimes when she is scared.) “Momma he’s moving!” Thank you, Jesus. The next morning we woke up to find Fred belly up in his jar with his arms and legs stretched out…not so good. “Shhh, he is sleeping!” Aubrey hissed at me. Fred had entered into his eternal slumber and I couldn’t let her take a dead frog to school. Fred’s Froggy Funeral, while alliterative, didn’t seem like a great 4K event. “Aubrey, Fred is…um, well, he’s not sleeping. Fred is dead. He is in froggy heaven with Jesus.” “OH NO!” She gasped, slapping her hands to her cheeks. I started making suggestions of other things she could take for show and tell that also began with the letter “F.” But she wasn’t convinced. “Mommy, I REALLY wanted to take my tiny little frog!” “If you hurry and get dressed, we can look for another one. But listen,
we probably won’t find a frog. You’d better pray that God helps you find one.” I didn’t really think God cared about her having a frog, but was trying to tell her that it was highly unlikely. Aubrey clasped her hands together. “God will you PLEASE help me find a new frog?” She paused before yelling, “Thank you! He said, YES Momma!” Once Aubrey and Emma were ready for school we marched outside to look for a frog the size of a fingernail. We searched the front yard with no luck, while I continued to make suggestions of other things she could take for show and tell. “But Momma, I REALLY want to take my tiny frog!” I sighed, and we soldiered on to the back yard. I was getting antsy, we only had five minutes before we needed to be in the car on our way to school. When suddenly, I saw a frog that made Fred look morbidly obese. I screamed, “There’s one Aubrey, get it!” I don’t touch frogs. She grabbed him in her fist and shouted, “YESSS! Thank you JESUS!” We placed Junior in the recently vacated Mason jar and ran to the car. I buckled them into their seats, and as I was backing out of the driveway, Aubrey pressed her face against the jar and whispered, “I’m sthorry your friend died!” When I think back on this story, I am reminded that there is no event in our lives insignificant enough to take to the Lord. I told Aubrey to pray as another way of saying, “Fat chance, kid.” She prayed because she believed he really cared and expected an answer. I want faith like that. Y Robin O’Bryant is a wife, stay-at-home-mother to three daughters, author, humor columnist and speaker. She thanks God for the days she is successfully able to multi-task. Read her blog at www.robinschicks.com or contact her via email at robinschicks@gmail.com.
MAINE’S BEST KEPT SECRET!! 3 BR, 2.5 bath furnished LOG HOME nestled on 20 private wooded acres on a 500 ACRE LAKE in Mid MAINE! Great for 4 seasons as YOUR home away from home! Snow Sled, White Water Raft, Moose Watch, Hike Appalachian Trail, or relax in front of the fireplace and read! PLENTY of room for 2 or 3 COUPLES to SHARE! Delta, Northwest, or Continental Airlines (or American if you fly into Boston & drive up to Bangor)
$1200.00/week or $1500.00 for 10 days
www.cabininmaine.net – password’s baxter P.S. It’s only 2 hours from BAH HAHBAH, and Acadia National Park. That’s a great day trip, and has great FRESH lobster!! metrochristianliving.com ❘ MAY 2011 25
➺food for thought by LYDIA BOLEN
CELEBRATE! Food and Family “My food,” said Jesus, “is to do the will of Him that sent me, and to finish His work.”
The month of May is filled with many family centered events such as Mother’s Day, Graduations, and end of the spring celebrations. Are you planning a special meal for Friends and family this month? I have an easy menu that you can plan in advance so you Can enjoy that special day with loved ones!
– John 4:34
CHEESY SHRIMP AND GRITS CASSEROLE This recipe can be made the day before and is a classic Southern dish with a twist. 1 1/2 pounds fresh shrimp, cooked and peeled 4 cups chicken broth (I boil my own or purchase already boiled) 1/2 teaspoon salt 1 (10 ounce) can diced tomatoes and green 1 cup regular grits chilies, drained 1 cup shredded sharp cheese, divided (4 ozs.) 1 cup shredded Monterey Jack cheese (4 ozs.) 1/4 teaspoon salt 1/4 teaspoon pepper 2 tablespoons butter Bacon; several pieces cooked crisp and crumbled 6 green onions, chopped Tabasco to pass at the table…(optional) 1 red pepper, chopped 2 cloves garlic, minced Bring 4 cups chicken broth and 1/2 teaspoon salt to a boil in a large saucepan; stir in grits. Cover, reduce heat, and simmer 20 minutes. Stir together grits, 3/4 cup Cheddar cheese, and Monterey Jack cheese. Melt butter in a large skillet over medium heat; add green onions, red pepper, and garlic; sauté 5 minutes. Stir together green onion mixture, grits mixture, shrimp, and next 3 ingredients. Pour into a lightly greased 2-quart baking dish. Sprinkle top with remaining 1/4 cup shredded Cheddar cheese and crumbled bacon. Bake at 350 degrees for 30 to 45 minutes.
MIXED CITRUS GREEN SALAD (adapted from Cooking Light, March 2010) 1 cup red seedless grapes, halved 2 ( 5-ounce) bags mixed salad greens 1 ( 11-ounce) can mandarin oranges, drained 1 (8-ounce) can pineapple chunks, drained 1 ( 8-ounce) can red grapefruit, drained 7 tablespoons Orange-Poppy Seed Dressing ( recipe follows) 21 walnut halves, toasted Combine first 5 ingredients in a blender; process until blended. Add poppy seeds; pulse once. Cover and refrigerate. Yield: 1 cup plus 2 tablespoons
ORANGE-POPPY SEED DRESSING 1/2 cup fresh orange juice 1/4 cup honey 1/4 cup canola oil 2 tablespoons champagne vinegar 1/8 teaspoon salt 1 teaspoon poppy seeds Combine first 5 ingredients in a blender; process until blended. Add poppy seeds; pulse once. Cover and refrigerate. Yield: 1 cup plus 2 tablespoons.
WHITE CHOCOLATE CHIP POUND CAKE 1 box yellow butter cake mix 1 ( 8 ounce) carton sour cream 1 large box instant White Chocolate pudding 1 1/2 cups white chocolate morsals
1/2 cup oil 1/2 cup water 4 eggs Baker’s Joy spray
With electic mixer, mix together cake mix, pudding, oil, water, and eggs. Mix well and add Sour cream and white chocolate. Mix until well blended. Spray Bundt pan very well with Baker’s Joy. Pour batter into pan and bake at 350 degrees for 55 minutes. Insert cake tester to test for doneness. Allow to cool 10 minutes or more before removing cake from pan. Turn onto a cake stand for presentation and sprinkle with powdered sugar.
26 MAY 2011 ❘ Metro Christian Living
How to PLAN Meals
F
amily meal planning is a tough job for busy Moms these days. If you plan ahead, you can have “healthy meals” for your family that are much easier on the pocketbook than a drive-thru window! These kitchen management tips should help you get started:
•
Get into your refrigerator, freezer, and pantry, and totally CLEAN OUT.
•
With a clean pantry now, you can stock with items that you will need often. You will always have something on hand to prepare! Side note: if you have a membership at Sam’s, enjoy the re-stocking of freezer and pantry in one shopping trip.
Wright & Ferguson Funeral Home Parkway Memorial Cemetery
JACKSON
RIDGELAND
CLINTON
RAYMOND
• A beginner goal: Plan a weekly menu. Take a moment. Look at your weekly family schedule. What evenings will you be gone? What evenings will the entire family be home? Having this on paper is a good step towards stress-free meal planning.
• •
A good menu plan saves money, saves time, and improves nutrition! Get family members in on menu planning. When you serve food your family likes, you avoid waste. Make a collection of economical, nutritious recipes family members love, and serve them often. Keep a rotation of everyone’s favorites.
• Have ready resources of family meals. Keep favorite recipes in order. Recipes can be put in colorful folders and labeled…such as meats, desserts, vegetables, salads, etc.
•
Some family-friendly resources I enjoy are food blogs. Here are my go-to ones I like: pioneerwoman.com, ourbestbites.com, mommiecooks.com, simplyrecipes.com, plainchicken.blogspot.com, mealsmatter.org, mommyskitchen.com, savorysweetlife.com
Serving Jackson Area Families With Dignity and Compassion for Over 75 Years WITH: Traditional Funeral Packages Cremation Options Mississippi’s Most Prestigious Perpetual-Care Cemetery Prearrangement Welcome
601.352.3632
Some of these food blogs even have step by step tutorials of how to prepare a dish. Don’t forget to check with your relatives for their alltime favorites to add to your files!
• • •
When making a casserole, make two. Eat one, freeze one for later. Schedule in times for the family to eat leftovers. Break out the slow cooker! Many recipes are available with these cookers on food blogs and cookbooks. The slow cooker saves time.
•
Prep ahead! For a more involved meal, try doing prep work, such as grating or chopping the day before. Store in baggies. Prep veggies after a grocery run. Go ahead and wash and bag up your veggies and lettuces.
•
Try new recipes. It will make meal planning fun. It will help keep your family’s health in check.
•
Very important: Serve meals at the family table. Keep the conversations positive. Use the dinner table to enjoy your family. A fun game to do at the table is to and ask each family member their “high point” of their day. You can learn a lot about each other by asking this question.
•
Family meal planning has great benefits. Tweak your busy schedule, plan ahead, be resourceful with recipes, and you will find healthy meal planning will work for you and your family!
I found this quote from Julia Child on one of my favorite food blogs.
“You don’t have to cook fancy or complicated masterpieces—just good food from fresh ingredients.” Good wisdom when planning healthy meals for loved ones! Y
Remember to make memories through the kitchen...“the heartbeat of the home”. Go to my blog at www.lydiasapron.blogspot.com or email me at lbbolen@gmail.com. metrochristianliving.com ❘ MAY 2011 27
something
special
➺let’s talk it over by MOLLY MEEKS
Mad About Mom! periods of time. In other words, the children feel like they can never “get it right” ending up trapped in a continual, yet pointless battle, to please and seek approval, attention and love. When you grow up, get married and have a life and hope and beauty. Perhaps that is why family of your own, a very common feeling is a May is the month chosen for Mother’s Day—a sense that you are always serving two masters. national holiday to celebrate our mothers and You may be simultaneously trying to be the their contributions to family and society. On perfect child and the perfect partner. This is an this holiday we express appreciation and impossible task. affection to our mothers for what they have And then there is the guilt! After all, the given us the other 364 days of the year—being Bible tells us to honor our father and mother. our life-givers, nurturers, providing Our histories can mislead us into feeling unconditional love, affection, and support. disrespectful for setting boundaries with our But what if this wasn’t your story? parents. Yelling at your parents would be What if your childhood, adolescence and disrespectful. Making choices and setting even adult relationship with your mother was boundaries are actually solid foundations for life draining rather than life-giving? healthy relationships. It is What if you thought this healthy to occasionally say no, was normal and took full to refuse to stay in a situation responsibility for not being What if your where you are being treated able to live up to your rudely, and to feel free to mother’s expectations? childhood, weigh mom’s input, yet How do you feel in adolescence and ultimately make your own church on Mother’s Day decisions. It is not even Sunday if you can even force even adult disrespectful when mom pulls yourself to attend? relationship with the guilt card and you Of course mothers aren’t respond with, “I’m sorry you perfect. We all have good your mother was feel that way”! days and bad days, but in life draining rather The assumption that these cases the mothers were everyone who has a baby is so caught up in their own than life-giving? automatically a “good mom” is lives that they were unable to unrealistic. If you recognize empathize or make yourself or your mother in this meaningful connections with article then do some more research. You may their children. They were emotionally want to talk with a counselor to get a fresh unavailable, had a narcissistic style of relating perspective and support as you begin to shift and maybe even fit the criteria for Narcissistic your focus from trying to keep mom happy to Personality Disorder. Since children assume investing in having healthier relationships with that the way their moms parent is “right”, this your spouse, your children and/or your friends. relationship pattern becomes deeply ingrained On Mother’s Day do something special and take and affects our psyches. The outcome is often care of yourself. Give yourself permission to an adult child who suffers from chronic live the life God intended for you. This is the depression, low self esteem, generalized rage at the world (often repressed), chronic anxiety and best way to begin the process of healing, forgiveness, resolution and peace. But you still a failure to fulfill his potential. might not be able to spend much time with So why do you take responsibility for mom’s mom! Y behavior? Why do you feel guilty if she is unhappy? Unfortunately narcissists are very successful at convincing their children and later, Molly Meeks is a Licensed Professional Counselor with Summit Counseling. the adult children, that they are at fault for She specializes in working with everything that goes wrong in mom’s life. They are convinced that they are no good and that no caregivers, older adults, grief, depression and anxiety. She is married matter what they do, they can never please and has three teenaged daughters. their parents, except maybe for very short
ay! What a marvelous month! May is often filled with beautiful weather, blooming flowers and singing birds. May is full of
M for
Mom
28 MAY 2011 ❘ Metro Christian Living
by BRYCE MOTT
âžş
welcome home SPRING
CLEANING TIPS is a great time to do a strong deep cleaning of your Spring entire home or business.
During the winter, family members, children, and pets are confined indoors for longer periods of time and dirt accumulates more quickly. Spring cleaning is meant to go beyond regular housecleaning to eliminate that accumulated dirt and freshen your home for a fresh season.
BEFORE
Hard Surface Floors and Grout: The first step to cleaning hard surface floors such as tile and stone floors is to sweep or vacuum to remove loose dirt, dust, and pet hair. Soil accumulates everywhere. Germs, viruses, dirt, grime, mold, mildew and bad odors start to accumulate in what we call “Micro-layers� on your tile/stone floors and fill the micro pores in the grout joints as you mop and or Swiffer your floors. What can home/business owners do to keep floor clean:
Âť First, have good walk-off mats at the entry to your home or business. Inside and outside. Keep them clean and vacuumed.
Have You Fixed Your Dirt Crawl Space Yet? Get Rid of That Damp, Musty Smell in Your Home!
The earth in your dirt crawl space is the major source of moisture in your home! This moisture is carried up into your house from [OLUH[\YHS\W^HYKHPYĂ…V^JYLH[LKMYVTYPZPUNOLH[ The CleanSpaceÂŽ Crawl Space Encapsulation System is the answer!
www.mscrawlspace.com
Call Today!
601-898-0891
$GLYLVLRQRI(QHUJ\,QVXODWLRQ,QF‡5L[RQ6LPPRQV2ZQHU
Âť Use mild cleaners for maintenance, avoid bleaching your tile and gout, it will break the grout down and ruin your floor.
AFTER In addition to regular cleaning, spring cleaning tasks may include:
Âť Dusting corners, ceilings, and walls, including photo frames and artwork
Âť Cleaning windows, window screens, and window treatments
Âť Scrubbing the fronts and insides of cupboards and drawers
Âť Cleaning and defrosting the fridge and freezer
Âť Cleaning ceiling fans, light fixtures, and vents
Âť Organizing closets, desks, and drawers Âť Cleaning the oven, microwave, and dishwasher
Âť Shampooing rugs, carpets, and upholstery The last area of cleaning will be your floors. By the time you reach the floors, you will have added dust and debris from other area cleaning, so always work by sweeping or vacuuming before mopping, scrubbing or shampooing.
Âť Use two buckets for mopping, one for cleaner and one for rinsing. Change the rinse water frequently to avoid contamination.
Âť Have a good cleaning and maintenance plan with your professional Tile and Grout Cleaning Company.
The tile, carpet areas, kitchen, bathrooms, outside entry ways and sidewalks all need to be emptied of its soil load, so over time with proper maintenance your home remains perpetually clean. This holds true to every house, restaurant, hotel gym, spa, hospital, doctor’s office, school and university and just about every occupied space on the planet. Our powerful truck-mounted cleaning system uses heat, a specialized cleaning solution, and vacuum power to remove the dirt that business/home owners can’t. So when the question is asked “do I really need a thorough tile and grout cleaning or carpet cleaning�, call Written In Stone Tile & Grout Restoration at 601-260-5650 for a free estimate. Y Bryce P. Mott is the owner and manager of Written In Stone LLC. Visit their site www.stonetileandgroutrestoration.com metrochristianliving.com � MAY 2011 29
Summit Recovery Ministries
➺the way i see it by MARTIN E. WILLOUGHBY, JR.
GUARD
INTENSIVE COUNSELING PROGRAMS (ICP)
YOUR HEART
For individuals and families from a Christian perspective • • • • • • • • • •
Behavioral Problems Anger Management Depression/Dealing with Loss Self-Esteem Social & Life Skills/Problem-Solving Skills/Goal Setting/Communication Skills Family Dynamics/Emotional Healing Assertiveness Training Drug/Alcohol Abuse/Dependency Eating Disorders/Self Harm Pornography/Sexual Addiction/Sexual Identity
601.949.1949 www.counselingministry.com
Venable GLASS SERVICES
• • • • • • • • • • • •
Auto Glass Windshields replaced in shop or mobile Rock repairs Heavy equipment Glass Shower Doors Mirrors cut to size Window & Picture Frame Glass Insulated Glass Table & Desk Tops Commercial Store Fronts and Doors Patio & Sliding Doors Plexi Glass
RIDGELAND 660 Highway 51 Ridgeland, MS 39157
601-605-4443 BRANDON 209 Woodgate Dr. South Brandon, MS 39042
601-824-4405 www.venableglass.com 30 MAY 2011 ❘ Metro Christian Living
ne of my favorite activities in life is the message has been generally consistent. “daddy-daughter” dates with Ally, With smartphones, and now the iPad and my 10 year old. I savor this time, as I similar devices, we can literally feast ourselves on fear that her hormones will be kicking in soon, as much information and imagery as we can and she will not dare be seen in public with me. possibly stand. Even though we are often On one of our recent dates, we went to see the educated about what food we put in our bodies, movie Soul Surfer based on the true story of we don’t talk much about what we “ingest” Bethany Hamilton. She was an up and coming 13 through our senses. In Psalms 101:3 David says, year old competitive surfer who lost her arm in a “I will set before my eyes no vile thing.” The shark attack. Her tragedy captured the world’s wisdom of Proverbs also teaches us to, “guard attention, as well as her heroic comeback to surf your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.” When again. Today, she is a 21 year old we consume media, we are shaping professional surfer who our thoughts and views of the continues to inspire people world. I believe that just as it’s with her courage and important to be knowledgeable perseverance. While it is an about what we eat so that we As our society encouraging and uplifting wise choices, we similarly continues to move make story, I took particular note of need to educate ourselves about away from the the Christian aspects of this what we consume with our minds. film. Bethany’s own faith is the How do we do this? For anchoring of the bedrock of her strength, and movies, we can utilize resources relationships of she is bold in proclaiming that such as www.previewonline.org. civic and church fact. Instead of erasing this These type sites provide in depth important aspect of her life, description of what we are life, our values the movie honestly portrayed actually exposing ourselves to in and thought life her as a person of faith. the movies we watch. We can also There is an age old debate are now shaped make sure we are reading classic about whether, “art imitates books that have stood the test of by the world of life or life imitates art.” I have time. We can view art and the media. also heard the argument that imagery that have inspired people today, “art has begun to define for centuries. We can be uplifted our reality and meaning.” In by music that speaks to our soul. other words, as our society We can read magazines that continues to move away from the anchoring of inspire us to be better people like Metro the relationships of civic and church life, our Christian Living! God gave us the arts as a values and thought life are now shaped by the blessing. Unfortunately, many people utilize the world of the media. We turn to the television, arts and media to manipulate us for their own movies, and internet to define for us what we personal or financial gain. As Christians, let’s be should care about, what our ethics should be, and people who create great art and media for the even what we should wear. Instead of sorting world to enjoy. Further, let’s make sure in this through these important life issues and working world of unlimited alternatives, that we take the them out in community, we are now bombarded time to “guard our hearts” and make wise choices with images that mold our subconscious in ways with our media consumption. Y that we probably don’t even know. Images are powerful communicators of messages. There is a Martin E. Willoughby Jr. is an reason that our churches used to have elaborate attorney/business consultant with stain glass images to portray the messages of the Willoughby Law Group, PLLC, located Gospel. Today, we have replaced these stain glass in Ridgeland. He and his wife Nicki images with jumbo screens. While the medium have two children, Ally and Trey, and has changed for these Gospel images, at least live in Madison.
O
all in the family by DR JOHN L. COX
Kids! Here’s What Your Mom REALLY Wants for Mother’s Day! hat’s right gang, it’s Dr. John with this year’s gift giving guide for Mother’s Day. I know that you are all probably stumped at what to give Mom on yet another Mother’s Day. Here’s your big chance. I’m going to tell you a little about moms and help you get clued in to what she might REALLY want on her special day.
T
1. If you throw stuff on the floor someone has to pick it up. I know I’m throwing a lot of heavy complicated stuff at you, but yes, if you throw stuff on the floor, it doesn’t just magically walk itself to the dirty clothes hamper. SOMEONE has to pick it up. You know how one of your favorite phrases is “That’s not fair!” Well, if YOU throw stuff on the floor and SOMEONE ELSE has to pick it up, that’s not fair! One of the greatest Mother’s Day gifts you can give your mom is to clean up the messes you make. She’s not your maid. Clean up your own messes. 2. Don’t make her have to tell you stuff twice. I know that this is counterintuitive. It goes against everything in your kid nature. I mean why do stuff the first time she tells you. She’s gonna say it again anyway, right? (One time my mom told me to do something, “And I’m NOT going to tell you again!” To which I replied, “Well, thank goodness!” Bad idea.) Here’s the reason to do stuff the first time. She gets tired of telling you. And it makes her feel like she doesn’t matter if you ignore her. Besides, parenting experts like me usually tell her to put you in time-out or take away your X-Box if you don’t do it the first time. What’s the fun in that? 3. Realize that when she says “No” she still loves you. I remember being a kid. I swear I do. Television was in black and white in those days. (That’s why old shows like Andy Griffith are in black and white. The world didn’t get colorized till the early 1960’s). Anyway, I remember being a kid and I remember that one of my least favorite words to hear from my parents was “No.” And I believe that my parents were the only parents who said it…just like yours. ALL my other friends got to do EVERYTHING, and I NEVER got to do ANYTHING…just like you. Stinks doesn’t it? Well here is the secret of the universe. Even when she says “NO” she still loves you. You know how when she takes you out to get pizza and then to a movie and then to get ice cream, but then says that you can’t get a DSI game that it feels like the WHOLE day was a piece of
garbage…that you are the most horribly abused victim child in the universe? The truth is that you got a lot of really great stuff that day, but just didn’t get ONE thing that you wanted. See, she still loves you. If she said YES to everything you wanted you’d end up being a really spoiled fat kid who pulled the wings off of flies. “No” means that you have to learn to deal with the same kind of “can’t have everything that you want” that everyone else does. But she still loves you.
4. She has a life apart from you. Again…I know it’s unbelievable. This Mother Unit whose sole purpose in life is to meet all of your needs has a life that doesn’t involve you, but yes, it’s true. She has a husband and friends (not just playgroup friends) and a hobby (hopefully) and her bible study and…yes…that means you have a babysitter and maybe dad…instead of her. You need to get used to this. She needs to have a life apart from you. As we have said before, she loves you, but you need to let her be HER too. If all she did was YOU, she’d be pretty limited as a person. Moms need to be more than MOMS and that’s dad’s responsibility in a lot of ways, but you need to let that be OK. 5. Moms aren’t perfect, but neither are you. You might not believe this, but your mom wishes she was the perfect mom. I talk to moms a lot and they all feel this way. (I think that at your birth they were all given a complimentary subscription to Fretful Mother magazine or something). They wish they could meet all your needs and always be fair and never yell at you. But, as you know, she sometimes messes up. Do you want to know why? Well, I’ll tell you. It’s because she is a person too. You know how you goof up stuff a lot? You spill your smoothie in the mini-van; you get all shot up in Metal Gear Solid; you hit your brother. Well, she’ll mess up too. And it’s important that you know that she still loves you. She’s just a person, like you. Besides, if she was the perfect mom and never goofed up, you would not know what to do with the real world when you grow up because it’s messed up all the time. So final Mother’s Day gift for 2011…Give her a break! Believe it or not, Mom’s are human too! Y Dr. John L. Cox is a clinical psychologist in private practice in Jackson. He also serves as the Visiting Director of Spiritual Development at Intown Presbyterian Church in Atlanta, Georgia. To contact Dr. Cox, please call 601-352-7398.
metrochristianliving.com ❘ MAY 2011 31
➺fresh finds 1
2
3 4
6
7
5
1. MADISON FIREPLACE & PATIO Ceramic firepots starting at $21 and up. Metal outside chairs, retro look. $99 each. Peacock Pillow for $48
2. APPLE ANNIE’S Painted, distressed wooden frames with plaque, small $29.95, large 38.95
32 MAY 2011 ❘ Metro Christian Living
3. O! HOW CUTE Paintings of birds and crosses; Art by Susan. $30 and up.
4. PERSNICKETY Vintage bead Jolt earrings. Starting at $30 and up. Hand-painted original ceramics by the Mustard Seed. $30 to $60
5. FRESH-WAY Mesh wreaths for $39.95. Comes in all different colors and combinations.
6. GAIL PITTMAN Bird Planter in Solid Glazed Coral $25 8 inch Trumpet Vases in Whisper Blue, Apple Green, and French Cream $35.
7. MONKEY CHARMS Ivory and Chocolate Glass Pearl Necklace with Silver and Copper Initial Pendant: $14.99
{ 5th grade baking for math }
1;/> YFPJX
HFPJ
the
First Presbyterian Day School
.ORTH 3TATE 3TREET s *ACKSON -3 s s FPDSORG
FRESH-WAY P R O D U C E
MAKE YOUR MOTHER’S YARD BEAUTIFUL AT FRESH-WAY FLOWERS, PLANTS, AND HERBS
DECORATIVE POTS AND CHIMINEA HANGING FERNS AND PINE STRAW
WROUGHT IRON DÉCOR
WE CONTINUE TO CARRY THE BEST IN PRODUCE!
FRESH VEGETABLES AND FRUIT
JAMS AND DRESSINGS
FROZEN AND BLANCHED VEGETABLES
CANNED VEGETABLES AND FRUITS
2089 Lakeland Dr., Jackson, MS www.tinninimports.com
4/;7:G=E<32/<2=>3@/B32Â’3AB/0:7A632 '&' $' =:21/<B=<@=/2Â’@7253:/<2;A $ '#$!% % metrochristianliving.com â?˜ MAY 2011 33
➺legal advice by WILLIAM B. HOWELL
Role Reversal: When the Child Becomes the Parent e all have our image of ourselves in relation to our parents. It is probably one of obedience and respect. We were taught not to talk back and not to ask unnecessary questions, but to obey. That situation was acceptable and enforceable when we were much younger, but now that we have matured, are in our middle years, and our parents have truly become elders, that picture no longer applies. Our parents may be becoming forgetful, or becoming infirm physically, which leads in some cases to a fearfulness of things that in prior years would have given them no concern. These are very real changes, and they have to be addressed in the relationship of parent and child. In order to make the life of the parent better and to make the life of the child easier, we often cling to that old relationship pattern, but we do so at our peril. Make certain that, as you need to take over for your parent, you have the actual authority. Many people rely upon a skimpy one-or-two-page power of attorney and think that will do the job. There are several omissions that will make such a document faulty and hobble your ability to do things on behalf of your parent. Specifically, if there is real estate involved, and most particularly
W
if it is homestead real property, you need to have the actual legal description of the property and the specific authority to sell or otherwise deal with the real estate set out within the power of attorney, and the power of attorney needs to be recorded at the courthouse. Recording is always a wise thing to do under any circumstances, because you may need multiple “true” copies of the power of attorney. It is much easier to get an attested copy from the Chancery Clerk’s office than it is to keep track of countless originals. Also, there is the question about how to go about canceling a power of attorney if there are multiple originals circulating, whereas it is easy to cancel a filed power of attorney at the Chancery Clerk’s office by filing a simple revocation of the power of attorney, thereby putting everyone on notice. Of course, our parents, ourselves, and just about everyone else need an Advance HealthCare Directive to be able to specify what it is that we do and do not want done for our care from a medical standpoint, particularly in the latter stages of life. This is a most useful document, but one that, strangely, many people do not have. It is easy to obtain and, again, should be recorded and copies given out to the
persons who are involved, including your physician and decision makers. And don’t forget the HIPAA authorization. Finally, ask about and learn about in detail your parents’ finances. This applies regardless of how wealthy or how impecunious they may be. Knowledge of their financial situation is crucial when you are the one going to be called upon to make the decisions regarding possible nursing home placement, independent living, or other arrangements. There is no substitute for knowledge, and the biggest impediment to gaining that knowledge is the child’s own reluctance and fear of being perceived by the parent as prying, when all the child is attempting to do is to gain the necessary knowledge to provide meaningful assistance in seeing to the care of the parent. They usually will understand this unless the parent is into advanced paranoia, in which case this inquiry should have been done a long time ago. It is imperative that you have a handle on the financial aspect.Y William B. Howell is a member of the National Academy of Elder Law Attorneys and practices law in Ridgeland.
You have worked hard for it. WHY THROW IT AWAY? We are all living longer. But we are not all going to be in good health, or aware of our families, or both. Then what happens? Someone has to take over. The question is: Will this be someone you chose? And will it be outside of court or in court? The same with the distribution of your assets after you pass away: In court or out of court? The choice is yours. What about protecting your assets from lawsuits, or a child’s inheritance from a divorce? And will most of your hard-earned savings go to the nursing home? Or have you planned? Here are a few ideas for you to consider:
Living Trust – Allows the person you choose to take over for you in the event of your incapacity, without any court involvement. At your death the person you have chosen makes the distribution of your assets the way you have instructed in your Living Trust, and to do so promptly, inexpensively and privately, without going through probate in the court.
Asset Protection – Lawsuits are filed every day. If you get sued, are your assets protected? They can be, and probably should be. Also, the divorce rate has never been higher than it is today. Will your child’s divorce cause them to lose half of what you leave them after you are gone? Not if you plan now. The level of protection (or not) is up to you. Nursing Home Planning – Don’t qualify for long term care insurance, or can’t fit it in your budget? You don’t have to spend everything that you have in order to become eligible for nursing home benefits. There are legal and ethical ways for you to save well over half of your assets in most cases, even if you are already in the nursing home. Hear Mr. Howell on the radio
Tuesdays 8:35 am WJNT NewsTalk 1180 34 MAY 2011 ❘ Metro Christian Living
THE LAW FIRM OF
WILLIAM B. HOWELL, LTD. 406 Orchard Park • Ridgeland, Mississippi (601) 978-1700 or (800) 839-7857
National Academy of Elder Law Attorneys
event collage by TAY MORGAN and ANN COGGIN
Jackson Prep Senior Service Day On Wednesday, April 6th the Jackson Prep senior class inaugurated what they hope will become a tradition for years to come, Senior Service Day 2011. This particular senior class and their families wanted to do something to give back as a class, keep the service mindset in the forefront, and start a new tradition at Prep. They planned and funded the first Jackson Prep Senior Service Project. Families of the senior class generously contributed all the funds for this project in honor of fellow class members and the faculty at Jackson Prep. The students chose Stop Hunger Now because it is both a worthy organization and a project which involved the work of every single member of the senior class. The students worked hard all day long on Senior Service day packaging, weighing, sealing and boxing food products to feed hungry school children through out the world. The Jackson Prep senior class families raised enough funds to package over 40,000 meals on senior service day at Jackson Prep. More photos can be seen at www.jacksonprep.net under “recent photos.”
Y
Austin Terry, Elliot Guffin, Gary Dye, Will Heidelberg, James Coggin
Student Leaders Britt Buchanan, Wyeth Silber, Frances Phillips, Luke Love, Meggie Morgan, Eleanor Anthony and not pictured James Coggin Seniors working hard on the assembly line, weighing and sealing packages.
Louis Lampton opening another bag of rice.
Packing boxes Noah Killibrew and Taylor Donald
L to R: Marshall Furrh, Daniel Phyfer, Myers Carpenter, Jack Stewart Jennings, Benjamin Thomas
Laura Lee Smith, Meggie Morgan, Kendall Garraway
L to R: Mary Margaret Gunn, Claire Ellison, Sarah Burrow
metrochristianliving.com ❘ MAY 2011 35
➺rave reviews BOOKS
CD & ARTIST PROFILE
A Tailor-Made Bride Reviewed by Susan E. Richardson Hannah Richards never believes her dream of having her own dressmaking shop will come true until an eccentric client opens the way for her. She moves to Coventry, Texas with everything she needs to begin her business. On arrival she meets Jericho “J. T.” Tucker, a livery owner who believes fashion leads to vanity but whose kindness touches her. As Hannah settles into town and reaches out to her new neighbors, Jericho finds his preconceived ideas about her challenged. His past won’t let him believe a woman can be stylish and help others dress well without being shallow. The true test arrives when Hannah helps his sister Cordelia with her appearance to attract a beau. Both Hannah and Jericho must look to Scripture for truth about beauty before they can decide what to do about their attraction. In the meantime, someone seems to be trying to drive Hannah from town. In A Tailor-Made Bride, author Karen Witemeyer treats a potentially acrimonious situation with understated wit. Humor lightens the work throughout without making the message seem trivial or sinking to the level of burlesque. Strongly defined characters on all levels also strengthen the story. Anyone who loves either romance or historical fiction will enjoy this title. The author handled the historical aspect well in addition to creating a nicely crafted romance. If your mother loves fiction, consider A Tailor-Made Bride as a gift this Mother’s Day. Y Susan E. Richardson is a writer, critique reader, and former Christian retailer with a passion for meeting people’s needs through the written word. You can reach her through her website www.nextlevelcritiques.com.
36 MAY 2011 ❘ Metro Christian Living
In The Shadow Of Thy Wing Reviewed by Marilyn Tinnin
J
ackson native and recent Mississippi College graduate Mary Margaret May released her first CD this past November. In The Shadow of Thy Wing is a collection of twelve of the worlds’ most loved traditional hymns. They just happen to be some Mary Margaret’s personal favorites as well. She calls them “the songs I have grown up with.” Mary Margaret is a classical crossover soprano whose warm voice wraps itself around the lyrics in a tender and intimate way. This is a worship experience for the listener. There is a hard to describe quality that comes through in each selection— it’s more than technical mastery, although it is technically masterful. The musical mix is obviously very fine, thanks to her Nashville producer, Larry Hall, but it’s that certain something of Mary Margaret’s that reveals her passion for both the words she sings and the gospel itself. That is what makes this album so special. Mary Margaret began to study voice in junior high school. She had never
considered singing until her parents invited a lunch guest one Sunday who just happened to be a voice teacher. Winona Costello was simply making friends with Mary Margaret and her sister Madeline as she lead them over to the piano and
“We have to go through pain if we want to become like Christ.”
enticed them to sing along. She immediately recognized that Mary Margaret had a gift. Lessons soon began. Mary Margaret credits Winona with pushing her to believe she could be a vocal major. “I am not aggressive at anything except singing,” she laughs. Confident, but winsome, she is continuing her studies toward a masters in performing arts and pedagogy at Mississippi College where she studies
voice with Dr. Kristen Johnson. Her second album will be released in late fall. The title song is “I Asked the Lord.” The words were written by John Newton in 1779 and deal with the question, “Why do we have to go through pain?” Mary Margaret built this collection around her own struggles with that question and arrived at the answer, “We have to go through pain if we want to become like Christ.” Other songs in this collection will carry the message of God’s ability to get us through the tough times and comfort us no matter what comes. Younger sister Madeline is credited with being the chief collaborator in helping Mary Margaret choose the hymns and songs around selected themes and scripture. Locally, you can find In The Shadow Of Thy Wing at Lemuria and Bebop. It’s also available on I-tunes, Pandora and Amazon. And expect to hear lots more from this young lady! Y
events calendar May 5 The National Day of Prayer: From cities, counties, and communities to the seats of government in Mississippi and across America, thousands will bow their heads to gather in corporate prayer on this 60th annual National Day of Prayer. Throughout the state there will be prayer breakfasts, prayer walks, prayer gatherings at city halls, churches, parks, schools, and the state capitol. Please contact the national website at www.nationaldayofprayer.org to find a prayer event. May 6
It’s that time of the year again to pack the picnic basket and join the Mississippi Symphony Orchestra for their 30th anniversary of Pepsi Pops on the Ross Barnett Reservoir. Enjoy classics, patriotic marches and movie themes plus a fireworks show to end the night. For more information call 601-960-1565. May 7
The Alabama-Mississippi Chapter of the National Multiple Sclerosis (MS) will hold Walk MS beginning at 9:00 a.m. with check-in at 8:00 a.m. at Barnes & Noble at Renaissance. Come be a part of this opportunity to raise money for a worthwhile cause. To participate or volunteer call 601-856-5831. May 7
Arts Center on 4908 Ridgewood Road. Tickets begin at $25 and can be purchased online at www.japac.net.
Legacy Renewal Revival MAY 12 and 13
May 8 Are you fresh out of ideas for that perfect gift for your mom on Mother’s Day? The Jackson Zoo has the answer. The zoo is offering an all-day pass for mom to enjoy on her special day. For more information call 601-352-2580. May 24-June 5 Straight from the Old Testament Joseph & the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat will be presented at our very own New Stage Theatre. This familiar musical tells the remarkable story of Joseph and his brothers and will be sure to entertain the entire family. For more information call 601-948-3533.
MADISON May 10 Annandale Golf Course in Madison will be host to the 4th annual Sonny Fountain Memorial Golf Tournament for Kids. Registration and lunch begin at 11:00 a.m. and tee time is at 12:00 p.m. Money raised will go directly to support the programs of Southern Christian Services for Children and Youth, Inc. For more information call 601-354-0983.
VICKSBURG April 29-May 8 Vicksburg Theatre Guild will be presenting “Fast Food”- a fun filled adventure that takes a look at the behind the scenes events that occur during a stage performance. For ticket and show times call 601-636-0471.
CANTON
Jackson Academy’s Signature Artist series presents Jars of Clay at their Performing
WHAT’S GOING ON?
May 12 Get your walking shoes on and your alarm clock set! The Canton Flea Market is coming to town for their biannual visit. Over 1000 artist and craftsman will converge in historic Canton for a day of shopping and strolling! Y
First Baptist Church Jackson That “old time religion” is making its way to Jackson this spring with one of the most inspirational preachers n the South scheduled to lead a two-day revival in Jackson’s First Baptist Church. Dr. David Uth, pastor of the First Baptist church of Orlando, Florida, will be leading worship services. Joining Uth as music leader will be Dr. Jim Whitmire, Worship Pastor at the First Baptist Church, Jacksonville, Florida. Services will be held on Thursday, May 12 at 2:00 p.m. and 6:30 p.m., and at 10:00 a.m. on Friday. Mr. Glenn Shows, Family/Adult Consultant for the Mississippi Baptist Convention Board said, “Churches in surrounding areas of our state are already preparing to provide bus transportation to the revival for their members, senior adults, in particular.” The Mississippi Baptist Convention Board is sponsoring the revival. The Legacy Revival Choir will be composed of members of various Baptist adult choirs, mainly senior adult choirs in the state. Eva Hart, music ministry associate at First Baptist Church said, “We have been overwhelmed by the enthusiastic response we have had from the churches and their wanting to be involved in the choir. We are also planning to have an orchestra at all three services. These volunteer instrumentalists will accompany the choir and congregation in worship.” Anyone interested in participating in the choir should contact Mrs. Hart at 601 949 1951. Mr. Edd Brashier, Associate Minister of Music and Orchestra at First Baptist will be in charge of the orchestra. His contact number is 601-949-1959. “Music is such an integral part of worship. Dr. Whitmire was Minister of Music at Bellevue Baptist Church in Memphis, Tennessee for many years. We are very fortunate to have him as our music leader. We are going to be singing the old hymns and are anticipating an outstanding worship experience,” stated Hart. Washburn stated, “We have labeled these services as a Legacy Renewal Revival, to bring us all back to our ‘roots.’ Under God’s leadership, we feel that Dr. Uth and Dr. Whitmire can help us all, not only Baptists, but other denominations as well, to be re-awakened to God’s plan for us as Christians. Y metrochristianliving.com ❘ MAY 2011 37
MAY 2011
JACKSON
➺quips & quotes
ADVERTISING INDEX
}
{
Cut out the scriptures and quotes and place them around your home for daily encouragement!
✂ “Blessed are those whose transgressions are forgiven, whose sins are covered. Blessed is the one whose sin the Lord will never count against them.”
“Then Jesus declared,“I, the one speaking to you—I am he.” – John 4:26
– Romans 4:7-8
“But Ruth replied,“Don’t urge me to leave you or to turn back from you.Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God” – Ruth 1:16
“When you come to the place in your life where you make your difficult circumstances your friend and not your enemy, you find the secret of how it can be well with your soul even when it’s not well with your circumstances.”
“Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body”
– Jennifer Rothschild
– Elizabeth Stone
“You don’t really understand human nature unless you know why a child on a merry-go-round will wave at his parents every time around—and why his parents will always wave back.” – William D. Tammeus
“Finish, then, thy new creation; pure and spotless let us be; Let us see Thy great salvation, perfectly restored in Thee; Changed from glory into glory,‘til in heaven we take our place; ‘Til we cast our crowns before Thee, lost in wonder, love and praise.” – “Love Divine, All Loves Excelling” Charles Wesley
“Sin is strong and fleet of foot, outrunning everything.” – Homer
“Great relief and satisfaction can come from seeking God’s priorities for us in each season, discerning what is “best” in the midst of many noble opportunities, and pouring our most excellent energies into those things.” – Beth Moore
NORTH STATE ANIMAL & BIRD HOSPITAL 5208 North State Street • Jackson, MS 39206
601-982-8261 Dr. Adrian Whittington Dr. Jeb Cade Dr. Melissa McLendon OFFICE HOURS: Monday-Friday: 7:30 am - 6:00 pm Saturday: 8:00 am - 12:00 pm Sunday: Boarding only 5:00 pm - 6:00 pm
Boarding & Grooming Services Available
38 MAY 2011 ❘ Metro Christian Living
ADVERTISER
PAGE
Belhaven University......................................15 Belhaven Graduate & Online Program .......18 Brenda Travis Sitter Service .........................38 Central Mississippi Medical Center ...............3 Callaway’s Yard & Garden............................10 Carr, Riggs, & Ingram, LLC ..........................18 Chapman’s Florist.........................................17 Christ Covenant School ...............................14 Clinton Chamber of Commerce ..................10 Dr. Charles McMasters.................................23 East Lakeland OBGYN.................................12 Energy Insulation..........................................29 Environment Masters ...................................39 Eye Care Professionals.................................40 Farm Bureau Insurance ................................14 First Presbyterian Day School......................33 Fresh-Way Produce ......................................33 Grantham Poole CPAs .................................14 Highland Village ...........................................18 Icing on the Cake.........................................29 Jackson Academy School ..............................2 Jackson Preparatory School...........................7 Joel Clarke & Sons Jewelry .........................28 Kitchens Outside..........................................19 Lifeway Christian Stores...............................18 Madison Fireplace & Patio ..........................27 Maine’s Best Kept Secret.............................25 Miskelly Furniture ...........................................5 Newk’s ..........................................................31 North State Animal Hospital........................38 O! How Cute Gift Market ............................14 Odyssey Hospice............................................9 Persnickety Kitchens ....................................11 Regions.........................................................13 Sitters, LLC ...................................................28 Smoothie King..............................................33 Star 93.5 .......................................................39 Stegall Imagery ............................................35 Summit Counseling......................................30 Sunnybrook Estates........................................2 Tinnin Imports ..............................................33 Trio Skin & Body Clinic...................................8 Twin Lakes Camp .........................................12 Venable Glass...............................................30 William B. Howell .........................................34 Woman’s Hospital ........................................16 Wright & Ferguson Funeral Home ..............27 Written in Stone, LLC...................................17 For more information on our advertisers visit www.metrochristianliving.com
Not too cold. Not too hot.
Just right. To keep your family cool in the summer and warm in the winter, rely on Environment Masters – inside experts on the most comfortable homes in metro Jackson. Family owned since 1957, we’re committed to saving you money and serving you with excellence. In fact, we earned the 2010 Angie’s List® Customer Service Award. Call us to make sure your home air conditioner is operating at peak efficiency. Or, ask about the benefits you can enjoy with a new high-efficiency Lennox® system, including lower energy costs and cleaner, more comfortable living. The deadline for pre-summer savings is June 3, 2011, so hurry! You may miss out on a rebate of up to $1,000 – big savings to combine with your additional 2011 federal tax credit up to $500 – on a qualified, high-efficiency system. Call today. Now, call us for your home plumbing needs, too! Seven days a week.
Environment MASTERS Residential
601.353.4681 • www.environmentmasters.com
*Restrictions apply to limited-time $1,000 rebate; Offer expires June 3, 2011. 2011 federal tax credit available only on TXDOL¿HGKLJKHI¿FLHQF\V\VWHPV
June 11th @ Veterans Memorial Stadium
presented by...
on visit... i t a m r o f n i t e For tick www.star93fm.com metrochristianliving.com ❘ MAY 2011 39
If there is one word that most defines the mission of Metro Christian Living®, it is "authentic". We want to present authentic faith in such...
