The Swinging Bridge - March Edition

UNSUNG HEROES

MARK GRAYBILL

A SEMESTER IN REVIEW

CULTURE SHOCK

ADJUSTING AS AN INTERNATIONAL STUDENT

UNDERSTANDING STUDENT SENATE

MESSIAH'S LEGISLATIVE BRANCH

PROFESSORS VS. AI

CHATGPT'S IMPACT ON EDUCATION

THE END OF ART?

HOW AI IS IMPACTING ARTISTS

PAVING THE WAY

FIRST-GEN COLLEGE STUDENTS

LIFE IMITATES ART

DISCUSSING SENSITIVE TOPICS IN CLASS

IN HER HAYDAY

LYDIA SLOCUM OF FEEBLE LITTEL HORSE

ALBUM REVEIWS

MESSIAH'S LIFELONG FAN

MORRIS SHERK

CHRIS HEISEY

MESSIAH'S PRO-BASEBALL PLAYER

SATIRE

MESSIAH UNIVERSITY'S AWARD WINNING STUDENT RUN

EDITOR-IN-CHIEF

ETHAN DYRLI

DESIGN ASSISTANT

AMBER SWAISGOOD

YEARBOOK MANAGER

LILIANA MORA

AUDIO & VISUAL MANAGER TYLER CARUSO

AUDIO & VISUAL ASSISTANT ZACH HINDS

SPORTS & HEALTH EDITOR PJ RIDDELL

STUDENT LIFE EDITOR AJ JEROME

MAGAZINE

DESIGN MANAGER

ALLYSON LYNDAKER

DESIGN ASSISTANT KATE TRIMBLE

CULTURE & ARTS EDITOR MACKENZIE CHRISTIE

THE SWINGING BRIDGE THE PULSE STAFF

DIRECTOR

EMILIE RUSH

MUSIC DIRECTOR

SABRINA STANDFORD

ASSISTANT DIRECTOR

DANIKA JOHNSON

BUSINESS MANAGER DOM LUCYSHYN

WEB MANAGER

ADI MANSOUR

RADIO MANAGER DANIEL LESLIE

SOCIAL MEDIA MANAGER PAM REINOSO

ETHAN DYRLI EDITOR - IN - CHIEF

Dear readers,

As the first signs of spring start to appear, we are excited to present the March issue of The Swinging Bridge magazine. This month's edition features a diverse range of topics, from the impact of AI on art and education to the inspiring story of Morris Sherk, a lifelong fan of Messiah Basketball.

Our cover story this month explores the role of AI in education and its impact on professors. We had the opportunity to speak with ChatGPT, a large language model trained by OpenAI, and gained insight into how AI is transforming the way we learn. The article delves into the benefits and challenges of using AI in education and highlights the importance of finding a balance between the two. We hope this article will spark a thought-provoking conversation among our readers about the future of education and the role of technology in it.

Another topic we are excited to explore this month is the impact of AI on the world of art. In "The End of Art: How AI Is Impacting Artists," we take a deep dive into how AI is changing the way we create and consume art. We examine the ways in which artists are incorporating AI into their work and the implications this has for the future of the art world. This article is a must-read for anyone interested in the intersection of technology and art.

On a different note, we are thrilled to introduce you to Morris Sherk, a Messiah Basketball fan who has been attending games for over 50 years. In "Morris Sherk: Messiah Basketball's Lifelong Fan," we share his inspiring story and highlight the impact he has had on the basketball program. Morris's unwavering support and dedication to the team have made him a beloved figure in the community, and we are honored to share his story with our readers.

As always, we have included a range of other articles and features in this month's issue, including travel tips, book reviews, and recipes. We hope you enjoy reading them as much as we enjoyed putting them together.

Finally, I want to take a moment to thank our team of talented writers, editors, and designers who work tirelessly to produce each issue of The Swinging Bridge magazine. Their hard work and dedication are what make this publication possible, and we are grateful for their contributions.

Thank you for being a loyal reader of The Swinging Bridge. We hope this issue inspires you to think outside the box and explore new ideas.

Best regards,

Ethan Dyrli

Editor’s Note: This piece was drafted by OpenAI’s ChatGPT

Springtime FAvorites

WRITTEN BY SABRINA STANDFORD

DESIGNED BY KATE TRIMBLE

My favorite thing to do around campus during this time is to just be outside - whether it’s hammocking by the breeches or running on the fitness trail. This month’s playlist is an eclectic mix of songs and genres that I think are best played in the warm weather. So use this playlist for whatever fun things you are doing outside.

Every Summertime NIKI

Lovely Day Bill Withers

Can I Call You Tonight / Quarterback Cal in Red

Riptide Vance Joy

Ventura Highway America, George Martin

Someone New Hozier

Still Beating Mac DeMarco

Everywhere Fleetwood Mac

Here Comes Your Man Pixies

Stargazing The Neighborhood

It Gets Better Rex Orange County

Can’t Run Forever Vacation Manor

Club Tropicana Wham!

Tangerine Led Zeppelin

It Ain’t Over ‘Til It’s Over Lenny Kravitz

24 / 7/ 365 Surfaces

Fingers Crossed Coin

Shy HUNNY

MESSIAH'S Mark Graybill HEROES UNSUNG

WRITTEN BY ROSIE SCHIANO DESIGNED BY AMBER SWAISGOOD AND ALLYSON LYNDAKER

“Every day is not a typical day,” for a Messiah University groundskeeper, says Mark Graybill.

To say the least, Messiah University's campus is beautiful and it’s the devoted groundskeepers who make it stay that way.

Graybill is the current Grounds Manager at the university and has been an employee for 15 years. For 12 of those years, he worked in the grounds department by the athletic fields before being promoted to Grounds Manager three years ago.

Graybill oversees nine seasonal employees and seven full-time employees. Together, they manage over 470 acres of property, 300 of which are manicured.

The groundskeepers start the day by clocking in at 6:30 a.m. The first thing done upon arriving on campus is checking their section. Each full-time employee has a section on campus they need to maintain. This includes checking to make sure everything is safe and that no hazards have appeared overnight.

“While we are going through [their sections], it is trash clean up and making sure the general clean up of that section is done,” Graybill said. From there, depending on the season, the groundskeepers have various projects. If it's

the growing season, they have mowing, trimming, and keeping up with the beds, making sure everything is weed free and that the edges on the sidewalk are good.

“We make sure wherever the potential student is, where they are gonna walk, is cleaned up, blown, make sure we don't miss anything,” Graybill said.

The groundskeepers also work on Messiah events. In preparation for these events, they put signs up for open houses, put on their backpack blowers and clean up areas on campus, and set up tents around campus for various events.

The Messiah’s groundskeepers aren't only in charge of keeping your campus beautiful, they are also in charge of keeping our campus and the students safe.

“We are essential personnel,” Graybill said. “If there is a flood, trees down, or snow, we are the first ones called in for the situation.”

If the campus is experiencing unexpected weather, Graybill and his team are the first ones to come in. When it snows, they make sure the walkways are salted. In addition to that, they blow or shovel the snow from the sidewalks to ensure safety for the students and staff.

“Our number one thing is safety,” Graybill said. “Our guys are very specific about making sure when a student is walking across, maybe with their head down in their phone, or the earbuds in, that we are extra sensitive to that so we are making it a safe campus.”

Being a groundskeeper isn’t an easy job to do, but there are some things Messiah students do that make their job a little easier and worth it.

“Our students are phenomenal,” Graybill said. “When I was over on the athletic fields there were so many ‘Thank -yous.’ You feel appreciated here by the student body. The thank-yous go further than what they know when they say it.

Graybill and the other groundskeepers work diligently, priding themselves in togetherness and teamwork. At the end of the day, Graybill’s love of the university shines through.

“I absolutely love my job. I love this university, I love the people we work with, I love the students, I love everything about it,” Graybill said.

PHOTOS BY ZACH HINDS

In the rapidly changing world of health care, skilled nurses with an advanced nursing degree are in high demand. Advance your career as a family nurse practitioner or in nursing leadership with a Doctor of Nursing Practice degree or as a nurse administrator or nurse educator with a Master of Science in Nursing degree from Messiah University.

Messiah’s MSN and DNP degree programs are accredited by the Commission on Collegiate Nursing Education

Our program offers:

• Courses taught by supportive faculty from a Christian faith perspective

• Clinical hours are intentionally planned and assigned to add value to your education

• Deferred tuition option with no out-of-pocket tuition fees

• Small class sizes and personal attention

• Flexible start dates and plans of study

• Online coursework

Messiah University alumni receive a tuition discount.

A SEMESTER IN REVEIW

PHOTOS BY TYLER CARUSO AND ZACH HINDS

Earn your

The Master of Arts in counseling at Messiah University will help you become a skilled counselor, capable of working in a variety of settings. We offer degree tracks in clinical mental health counseling; marriage, couple and family counseling; and school counseling.

All program tracks nationally accredited by CACREP since 2012

• Prepare for professional licensure and certification.

• Designed for busy professionals—the majority of courses are completed online.

• Our post-master’s Certificate of Advanced Graduate Studies (CAGS) in counseling equips those who need to meet state licensing requirements.

• Our faculty are experienced Christian counselors and nationally recognized scholars who take time to mentor students in their education, faith and career.

• No-fee tuition

Predominately online courses; 2-year program completion

messiah.edu/counseling

CULTURE SHOCK

ADJUSTING AS AN INTERNATIONAL STUDENT

WRITTEN BY AJ JEROME

DESIGNED BY AMBER SWAISGOOD

For all students, adjusting to college is challenging, whether you live five minutes away or in another state. But for international students, this transition is even harder. Not only do international students have to adapt to American culture, but they also have to adjust to the specific culture of Messiah University.

Phoebe Lim, a junior nursing major, also has experienced several countries in her life. She has lived in Singapore, Malaysia, and Hong Kong. Lim recalls that her first experience with culture shock happened when she was very young.

“I didn't know that people could freely worship whatever religion they wanted to worship with openness and without fear of persecution,” Lim said. “I had grown up in a country that was deeply oppressive of any form of religion that wasn't ancestral worship, and so I was quite shocked when I went to a church for the first time that wasn't guarded by police, gated, or hidden in a house.”

Joshua Nganga Ndura Kariuki, a sophomore Politics and International Relations major, was born in Lancaster, but his dad is from Nairobi, Kenya and his parents were missionaries in Chad. While growing up, he traveled between the three

places, which made him realize how strange some normal behaviors in America seem.

“I think the one thing that I’ve been noticing more often is that a lot of Americans will smile and say hi even if they don't know you,” Kariuki said. “You could be going in opposite directions and someone will say hi. To me, that’s weird because I don’t know you, you don’t know me.”

Danuta Tachayeni Durai Raj, a senior biopsychology major, is an international student from Malaysia. She shares the same views on American greetings as Kariuki.

“If I was back in Malaysia, I would not typically try to talk to someone on the elevator or a stranger, because that would result in awkwardness,” Durai Raj said. “A lot of people in my culture tend to want to shy away from embarrassment or things that could lead to embarrassment- it's just not normal to just talk to people that you don't know.”

But beyond adjusting to American culture, Messiah as a community has a distinct culture that requires adjustment. This can cause culture shock for students who are not used to the culture here, and even more for international students.

“Messiah's culture feels like the exact antithesis to my own culture, filled with individuality and brazenness,” Lim said. “There is a distinct lack of diversity and cultural inclusion

here that is extremely foreign from my own country, which to this day is still hard to get used to.”

“I don't believe it is genuine sometimes when people ask me how I am, it's more of courtesy or politeness, which is not something I would do back home,” Durai Raj said. “However, on the flip side, I think I have found people here that are genuinely wholesome and lovely. They're very bright, good-natured, and loving towards the community, which I attribute to our Christian values.”

Durai Raj also noted that she had expectations for how American college students would act, but those expectations were proven wrong once she got to Messiah.

“I think that many people at Messiah are super sheltered and don't know things outside of Pennsylvania or America, which isn't a bad thing, but they're just not as exposed or aware as I would've expected college students to be,” Durai Raj said.

Culture shock is a phenomenon that no international student can escape. But with the support of the community here at Messiah, along with friends and family from back home, international students soon find comfort in once shocking differences.

“Things just suddenly felt much better in my second semester cause I was more adjusted,

knew what to expect, and found support in the international community as well as friends from my floor,” Durai Raj said.

“I really needed to go home over the summer just for my mental health and it was so weird cause I kept comparing everything back home and how some things exist in America but not at home. It was some weird reverse culture shock thing and I questioned a lot about why we don't practice some of the good things that America has back home too.”

Whether culture shock is experienced through entering a new country or entering into a new stage of life at Messiah, there are challenges while facing a new situation. But even as international students are faced with things that may make them uncomfortable or uneasy, it pushes them to find spaces in which they can truly find belonging.

UNDERSTANDING STUDENT SENATE

MESSIAH'S LEGISLATIVE BRANCH

WRITTEN BY NATE CASTELLITTO DESIGNED BY AMBER SWAISGOOD

Each semester, a group of student leaders congregate to engage in discourse on the student body’s self-governance and programming. University policies, campus structures, and club budgets are all topics which they consider.

This group, Student Senate, consists of officers from each of Messiah’s fifty-plus chartered and executive clubs, special interest groups, and the Student Government Association’s (SGA) at-large senators and executive cabinet. Unless they’re a representative, however, students might have never heard of Senate, or they’re unaware of its function.

Mireliz Bermudez, Student Body Vice President, has a simple explanation.

“When explaining Senate to somebody, it seems overly complicated, and people have this perception that you need to be formal and there’s a certain language you need to use. It’s really a space for anybody who has concerns about the campus to come and speak,” Bermudez said.

Senate, led by Bermudez, is considered the legislative branch of SGA. Through majority-rule decisions, it has the power to amend SGA governance and recommend institutional changes. While students do not have jurisdiction over those institutional changes, they can pass resolutions based on the student body’s concerns.

“[Senate] has the official vote on proposals, ideas or concepts that are brought to the administration,” Bermudez explained.

Along with Bermudez and the rest of her cabinet, Pauline Deutcheu Tchouako, Student Body President, works to foster a healthy channel of communication between institutional administration and student organizations, who represent the student body.

“Senate is the most official vessel of [student] concerns. Those should be coming in…and passed on to me as President to then go to the administration and say, ‘Here's paragraphs of what students want to see you do,’” Deutcheu Tchouako explained.

To this end, issues which Senate recently tackled include religious tolerance, sustainable operation, and student employee wages. Insights from these conversations, a number of which came through formal resolutions, have made their way into the university’s institutional committees, which in turn advise the administration. Organization leaders were eager to engage in meaningful discourse and bring various student perspectives to the table.

“[This is] why it’s important for our clubs to continue and that they're sustainable for…the institutional side of healthy and cohesive learning and engagement,” Gabrielle Mitchell, Student Body Vice President of Organizations, said. “We have a varied group of people and body of students that we're trying to represent.”

Meanwhile, areas where Senate has immediate prerogative are the extracurricular programming and events which make up student life. As liaison to those clubs, Mitchell, a freshman, gets to work closely with student organizations as they chart and pursue unique, individual goals. With the needs of the student body in mind, they then divide the student activity fund equitably amongst themselves at one of the first Senate meetings each semester.

“The student body is the main [interest] that we are concerned about because they are the ones who will be impacted and growing from programming and events,” Mitchell commented.

Unlike institutional agenda items, of which students are discouraged by a lack of influence, the fruits of their self-governance and

planning can be seen each semester. Mitchell’s Finance and Organizations Committee keeps up with club operations to ensure they are serving their communities to the best of their abilities. After a night of constructive dialogue, some longer than others, representatives are always eager to share their upcoming events with one another at the end of each Senate meeting.

“What I’m always interested in coming into a new year is whether the particular batch of student leaders is going to be more concerned with community or outcomes,” said JP Edmunds, Assistant Director of Student Engagement and SGA advisor.

“It’s not common that you get a group that pursues both…The one thing I think [clubs and organizations] have achieved is that they’ve built a meaningful community during their time here.”

In addition to attending Student Senate, which is open to everyone, students are invited to become an at-large Senator. Senators sit on SGA committees defined by categories of student concerns, who then draft policies and governance amendments on those students’ behalf. Just like organization officers, Senators have voting power, too.

Senate meetings are held Monday nights in the Admissions Center. A semesterly calendar and Senator applications can be found on SGA’s university webpage.

PHOTOS BY TYLER CARUSO

PROFESSORS VS. AI

“The wolf is at the door,” read the New York Post while covering ChatGPT. Since its release, ChatGPT has been a source of excitement and anxiety in the educational landscape. Many see it as the future of writing, but the question has to be asked: could ChatGPT even pass as a student at Messiah?

What is it?

ChatGPT, an AI language processing model developed by OpenAI, is able to respond to prompts from users with original sentences near instantaneously. Even more impressive, these responses sound human.

Nathan Bos is a cognitive psychologist, lecturer at Johns Hopkins University and Principal Collaborative AI Engineer at MITRE. According to Bos, ChatGPT emerged from recent developments in AI research, allowing ChatGPT to scan the mass amounts of text available on the internet, process it contextually, and respond logically.

“One thing we [previously] really never asked language models to do because they were so horrible at it was just produce text,” Bos said of ChatGPT’s predecessors. Now, versions later, ChatGPT has been polished, and could potentially revolutionize writing.

WRITTEN BY ETHAN DYRLI

DESIGNED BY ALLYSON LYNDAKER

CHAT GPT'S IMPACT ON EDUCATION

How did it do?

To test ChatGPT’s writing abilities, assignments were gathered from three Messiah professors from various disciplines: marketing, philosophy, and English. Each of the submitted prompts were run through ChatGPT, then graded by their respective professors.

Keith Quesenberry, associate professor of marketing, has been testing ChatGPT with his students. In doing so, Quesenberry has been impressed by ChatGPT's ability to mimic human writing.

However, when matched up with a situational analysis from his Principles of Marketing class, ChatGPT was less impressive. For starters, ChatGPT struggled with accurately responding to the prompt, missing out on clearly marked word count and content requirements.

While it would often cite what appeared to be correct sources, what the AI was actually doing was pulling information from one source to complete the piece analyzing the audio market, then pulling seemingly relevant sources into its references.

According to Quesenberry, ChatGPT’s solid structure, research, and select paragraphs only got it so far.

“With the missing requirements, sections and overall lack of understanding of the streaming audio market I would have to give this a D,” Quesenberry said.

For its philosophy credit, ChatGPT was put against three prompts from Eric Deitch, adjunct instructor of philosophy. Deitch asked the AI to explain how to evaluate ChatGPT’s effectiveness, to explain philosophy, and the concept

“This changes everything...”

of a soul, each in differing word counts. In many ways, ChatGPT succeeded at its initial goals, gathering information and organizing it into a cohesive piece. Once it started reaching the 400 word mark though, it struggled to go in-depth, often not reaching word counts or relying on repetitive and cliched language.

For the pieces on evaluation and philosophy, ChatGPT played to its organizational strengths and clinched a C and a B, respectively. Still, the last piece failed to land, which Deitch said he would hand back to the student upon submission.

According to Deitch, the prospect of students turning AI-generated pieces isn’t concerning to him. “I know there are some people that [are concerned], but I think it will be very very easy to see,” Deitch said.

Moving into English class, ChatGPT was met with questions from Kerry Hasler-Brooks, Chair of the Department of Language, Literature, and Writing. Hasler-Brooks tasked the AI pupil with a personal essay, close reading, and research paper.

Not surprisingly, ChatGPT failed to connect with the “human elements,” instead performing well with the summary and background of each text. Yet, while again failing to meet word count, its greatest lapse was crafting cohesive writing.“

As a writer, there's almost no synthesis of ideas, synthesis of parts, it's a very fragmented output,” Hasler-Brooks said.

Looking at the gradebook, ChatGPT earned a D- on its personal narrative, a C+ on its

- Keith Quesenberry

close reading, and an offer to come to office hours to discuss its final paper.

All this to say, if you’re planning on using ChatGPT to skip out on a class assignment, you may be out of luck for the time being.

Impacting Education

While ChatGPT may not currently be advanced enough to pass for a human, both Bos and ChatGPT’s developers claim many of its largest problems will soon be fixed. However, even if AI writing bested human abilities, Bos believes that fearing being “replaced” misses the potential of AI.

“You’re not replacing people,” Bos said. “What you’re doing is you’re actually empowering people to do more and better than you were before.”

When considering ChatGPT’s uses in education, Bos and Messiah’s faculty overwhelmingly pointed out its ability to help students research, brainstorm and draft their ideas.

“It has seen so much text, that it can often come up with different twists, different ideas, different variations than an unaided human can,” Bos said.

But don’t let ChatGPT’s grades in the classroom distract from its technological achievements.

“This changes everything,” Quesenberry said. “The way I see it is this is another significant revolution that's going to really shake things up. And it's not going to go away.”

THE END OF ART?

HOW AI IS IMPACTING ARTISTS

WRITTEN BY CIERA CHILDS

DESIGNED BY ALLYSON LYNDAKER

All over social media recently, there has been talk about art made by artificial intelligence—a topic that is both complex and often controversial. While some artists celebrate the immense possibilities, others grapple with creative and ethical questions.

In Japan, Netflix’s use of AI for the background art of a new short film drew backlash from anime workers. In the U.S., artists debated whether an author owns the copyright to a graphic novel made of pictures generated from written prompts. In December, director Guillermo del Toro even slammed animation created with machines as “an insult to life itself.”

So, what exactly is AI Art? In short, it is artwork (visual, audio, or otherwise) generated by a machine learning process—that is, a machine has "learned" some information and used it to generate a new image. Humans may have collected the data or written instructions for the machine to use, but the process of creation is left to the machine.

It’s one thing to hear about all the controversy online, but what do Messiah University's very own art students and professors have to say on the subject, and how does it impact their lives?

Hong Huo, Assistant Professor of Graphic Design and Digital Media, sees AI art as “a matter of human and AI collaboration, that we teach the machine to create a certain type of imagery that looks good, and of course, with the unique computer algorithm, there will be some small surprises.”

In her Digital Imaging class, Huo uses DALL-E 2, an AI art software, to generate a concept drawing project themed “Computer meets Nature.”

“I think one of the best things about AI art that makes me think as an artist is what my hands can do that the machine cannot, and it actually brings more light to the types of work I do—work very closely and intimately with physical materials—which many times, do not involve much of a ‘machine learning,’” Huo said.

On the contrary, students seem to be warier about AI art and how it is being used today, including Evi Sargeant, a freshman Studio Art major.

“AI art loses the maker's ‘fingerprints’ or marksmanship. When a computer makes art, you lose the human behind it. The art becomes a ‘formula,’ rather than an original idea made by a person,” Sargeant said.

Anna Stempel, a sophomore Graphic Design student, believes that AI art has become so mainstream because of its accessibility.

“It’s easy. I think that people who don’t understand the whole process of art and what art is find it to be a cool, easy way to create something,” Stempel said. “Humans are always trying to find the easier way, so with this it cuts time down tremendously –though again, not really the point of art.”

In order to reproduce an image that the human eye would consider art, AI art algorithms are fed thousands of images from work done by human artists, then jumbles those images to produce something new based on text input.

This creates a situation where artists from all over the world are having their art stolen and sold at extremely high prices without receiving any mention of credit or compensation.

This issue has also led to increasing talk surrounding whether AI art will put current artists out of jobs and shrink the market for aspiring artists.

For Willow Rosypal, a junior and aspiring graphic designer, this concept of stolen art is a major concern especially given the battle digital artists already regularly go through for recognition.

“Now that AI art is coming back onto the scene, digital artists, like me, who fought so hard to be accepted by the traditional media artists, and escape the stigma of digital art being worthless, are facing that same persecution again,” Rosypal said.

“Our styles are being stolen, and people are neglecting to support struggling digital art-

ists because they see no financial worth to something that they can make in seconds.”

Despite all the tensions regarding AI art, Huo argues that’s what’s most important is “that artists should see it as an opportunity to collaborate with the machine, and use it in a way that it celebrates diversity in creative expression with respect and dignity to other beings, and keep reflecting about the truth behind our art-making process.”

“It is unpredictable about how advanced the technology will get in the future, but I do believe that the good will always be good, no matter how the technology has changed,” Huo said.

AI generated works provided by Professor Huo

the Way Paving

First Gen College Students

-

WRITTEN BY AJ JEROME

DESIGNED BY AMBER SWAISGOOD

College is a time in a young adult's life when one learns how to become independent, but still can lean on family members and trusted loved ones to help them know what to expect during college. For students who have parents that went to college, it can be easier for them to know how to navigate certain situations such as choosing a college and financial aid. But for first-generation students, choosing to go to college can feel a little overwhelming at times.

Students who have parents that never attended college may have a different sort of pressure placed on them, either externally or

internally. Sophomore Early Education major Sydney Momot felt pressure to attend college because of the way it was talked about in her family.

“It felt like it was the only option that I really had after going to high school,” Momot said. “There was some pressure to be better than my parents were and to do more than they did.”

For sophomore Psychology major Chrislin Daniel, the pressure to attend college was more internal.

“I did face a little pressure,” Daniel said. “But it was also something that I wanted and needed to do for my career path.”

Picking a school and knowing what to look for can also be a challenge for first-generation students. Some, like sophomore Film and Media Arts major Ladai Dansen, turn to recommendations from friends and family, while others choose schools based on programs.

“I chose Messiah because I had friends who went here and they told me how much they loved it,” Dansen said. “I had also never gone to a private Christian school. My deciding factor was the campus itself.”

“I heard good things about their psych program and all the professors I met with seemed like they were very knowledgeable about the subject but also cared about their students enough to work with them and pray for them,” Daniel said. “I also had the chance to attend some multicultural events for prospective students and I could see how tight-knit and familial the program was, which was also something that drew me to Messiah.”

Financial aid is a process that is overwhelming and frustrating for any student. Messiah has multiple offices devoted to financial aid and tries to make applying for aid as easy as possible. However, this process can still be confusing for families who have never gone through the process before.

“My family had some questions and were a bit confused but we either figured it out eventually, asked people we knew, and eventually had to email the financial aid office so that we could get some more clarity,” Momot said.

“Sometimes my family was a little confused on the responses we got to questions, but if we asked another person in the financial aid department we would get a clearer answer,” Daniel said.

Being a first-generation student comes with a different set of challenges for college students. But do these challenges mean that being a first-gen student is a disadvantage?

“To an extent, yes, because the whole process of college applications in the states was so new to my family, and we felt like we were expected to just already know how everything works,” Daniel said. “It was a little frustrating navigating the process without feeling like people were being condescending or judgemental with their answers.”

“I think it definitely can be,” Momot said. “Going through the application process and financial aid with people who have never gone through it was stressful at times because we didn't know what to expect, what the process was like, or who to go to if we needed answers. There is also just a lot of pressure from family to keep going and to get good grades that it can cause a lot of stress on top of the normal college student stress.”

At the end of the day, students want to make those closest to them proud, first-gen or not.

“I felt a sort of pressure once I got to college and started thinking of my younger siblings,” Dansen said. “I wanted them to know it’s okay to want higher education.”

PHOTO CAPTION Pick an arrow to point in the direction of whichever photo you're captioning. Feel free to change the color of the arrow to match the spread - just make sure it's not too light.

TO BE BETTER THAN MY PARENTS WERE "There was some pressure and to do more than they did "

-Sydney Momot

DISCUSSING

SENSITIVE TOPICS IN CLASS

WRITTEN BY MAKENZIE CHRISTIE

MACKENZIE CHRISTIE

DESIGNED BY LILIANA MORA

When we study the arts, we are studying reflections of the world we live in. This is accompanied by a truth that we should all know well by this point – this world we’re living in isn't always easy.

From depictions of sexual violence, drug addiction, abuse, and violence, we are often forced to engage with material that is morally and ethically challenging. Opposite to real life, though, art has the capability to expose us to these ideas in an exploratory and self-contained space.

Kerry Hasler-Brooks, Chair of the Language, Literature, and Writing Department, feels that engaging with difficult concepts in literature is a crucial element of her academic work.

“Rather than asking ‘Can I teach this text,’ I'm more concerned with understanding how best to teach it,” Hasler-Brooks said.

“You want to require a student to step out of themselves so that learning really can happen, but you also have to do it in a way that cares for them, ensuring that they aren’t made to study these ideas in a way that is harmful.”

The case is no different in the art of film. Tara Whitehead is a Communications and Film Professor who left working in Hollywood to pursue a career in education. She believes that there is a fine line between unpacking difficult topics versus showcasing dangerous media.

“I am very intentional in the way we “unpack” certain topics,” Whitehead said. “To be honest, films and television that serve the sole purpose of emotionally manipulating the audience through exploitative narratives don’t always deserve to be unpacked or platformed at all.”

Of course, the introduction of challenging topics into the educational sphere will yield mixed reactions from students.

Vera Manila, a sophomore English major, feels that it is important to present these learning opportunities to students, but they must be critically evaluated before the material enters the classroom.

“I think a big part of learning is being uncomfortable and engaging with things you might not come across otherwise,” Manila said. “But when something can be considered detrimental, then I would begin considering if what a student is gaining from reading the text is worth what it could be costing them.”

Manila expresses that there must also be room for students to opt in and out of specific course material if they feel it may cause them harm.

“I’d never seek to ban a book or class material,” Manila said. “I just think we shouldn’t force students to encoun ter certain material that might be more harmful than helpful to them…The whole conversation raises the question of what is permissible versus helpful to engage with in the classroom.”

Angel Ortiz, a junior Film major, consid ers the most important element of teaching these topics to be the ethical responsibilities of the professor.

“When those topics come up, there are al ways content warnings, it’s never thrown at you unexpectedly. It’s definitely the role of the professor to ethically moderate those conversations to make sure they’re pointed in the right direction.”

Despite the challenges that exist when we attempt to unpack difficult themes, there is immense benefit that can come out of this type of work.

“I think it's really important be cause everyone is able to grow in those conversations: it raises aware ness of difficult topics, and gives peo ple the opportunity to tear down those stigmas,” Ortiz said. “Issues of sexism, racism, mental health, suicide, they’re all real life things that happen to people and need to be talked about.”

Hasler-Brooks agrees with this sentiment, believing it is through challenging material that we grow the most, both as academics and as people.

“I do think it's hard, but I also do not shy away from obviously challenging content…I might actually say I lean into it,” Hasler-Brooks said. “I believe not preparing students to join hard conversations is actually the most detrimental thing we can do to them.”

Ethan Oates, a Junior Broadcasting and Media Production major, takes this idea one step further, arguing that the class conversation should incite action that tackles these topics in real life.

“It's good to talk about these subjects in class, but if no one is actually going to do anything with that new knowledge, then I think that's where a lot of people mess up,” Oates said. “These things need to be more about what we do after we become aware of issues in our world.”

Whitehead seconds this notion, adding that there is a level of spiritual and religious responsibility that accompanies this practice if we are to seek change in the world.

“I do think it’s important to critique culture and how it represents or manipulates viewers thinking about secular and religious norms,” Whitehead said.

“Christian scholars should not eschew controversy. Rather, we should think about how to thoughtfully critique it and engage in solution-based discourse.”

" I do not shy away from obviously challenging content . . .

. . . Not preparing students to join hard conversations is actually the most detrimental thing we can do to them "

-Kerry Hasler-Brooks

lydia slocum feeble li ttle horse

The Pittsburgh-based band feeble little horse was formed by Sebastian Kinsler and Ryan Walchonski in 2021. After adding a third member, Jake Kelley, they recorded their EP "Modern Tourism", which was released in May 2021. The following month, the trio added one final member to their group who would undeniably help in establishing a name for themselves in the underground music scene; Lydia Slocum.

Slocum is a junior Studio Art major here at Messiah University, but her college experience is anything but standard. Balancing two vastly different worlds on her shoulders, Slocum expresses that as she joined feeble little horse, she felt a sense of recognition she failed to experience in her prior environments.

“My dad is an Anglican priest, my mom is the daughter of an Anglican bishop, and my sister went here too… so 17 or 18 years of Christian schooling is all I’ve had,” Slocum said. “The band stuff was the first time I ever had a non-Christian environment, and it was this moment of realizing ‘Oh my god, I finally feel like I fit in.’

“At Messiah, some times I feel weird, and I can tell peo ple make certain assumptions about me because of how I look,” Slocum said. “But when I go to play at shows, suddenly everyone looks like this. Peo ple know who I am, they take pictures with me, and then I come back here to my little campus and my small friend group…it kind of feels like my own Messiah Island.”

The intersection of Slocum’s academic studies and creative projects allow her to expand her horizons in ways she never thought possible. Not only has feeble little horse been signed to the recognized indie label "Saddle Creek" in 2021, but they have also developed their own independent label known as "Unstable Collective".

“I want to do art, I want to design things, and now that we have our label that we made, I can use our platform to do what I'm studying to do. We are going to use "Unstable Collective" to make lots of things, not just music.”

The band’s 2021 album "Hayday" was remixed and rereleased after signing to Saddle Creek. Despite the more deliberate methods the band often adheres to when creating new songs, Slocum describes the creation of "Hayday" to be their most enjoyable and spontaneous creative process yet.

“Hayday as a whole is so special to me because it was so spontaneous, an entirely different creative experience than anything that’s come after that. We just said yes to everything, did it in about three days, and at the end I couldn’t believe it had happened. We’ve definitely made better songs, but it hasn’t been as fun of an experience as that album was.”

For Slocum, the band is more than just noise, lights, and shows. It represents the fulfillment of a purpose that has been in the works for a lifetime, and the overwhelming sense of connection and belonging.

“I’ve had this urgent feeling for a lot of my life that there's something I need to make, and it's worth making and sharing, and I feel like I found the perfect puzzle pieces to do it,” Slocum said. “feeble little horse helped me make something I couldn’t have made on my own, but they couldn’t have made it without me either.”

“Now I’m thinking ‘Finally, I can breathe out’ …I made one thing people can enjoy, and now it’s out in the world.”

PHOTOS BY ZACH HINDS

WRITTEN BY MACKENZIE CHRISTIE DESIGNED BY KATE TRIMBLE of

"The biggest thing I’ve gained from this is the connections I’ve made, and the connections we make possible,"

"With this band, we can make people congregate and feel that sense of community I always felt when I went to shows. You can enjoy being in a crowd, you can feel understood.”

Slocum said.

Slocum is planning on transferring from Messiah to Chatham University in the fall of 2023 to continue her academic studies and musical pursuits. However, as she prepares to leave her “Messiah Island" behind, she recognizes how intimately tied this campus is to her early memories of the band.

“I remember recording songs in a little earbud microphone in my Naugle dorm freshman year," Slocum said. "I was in the Union the first time I ever listened to something Sebastian made. I made our album cover for "Hayday" in my bible night class with Larry Poston, the whole thing.”

“A lot of my memories are so tied to this location, and I think I'll realize that more and more after I leave. It’s going to be a bittersweet departure.”

Though Slocum’s journey through college and young adult life has been somewhat of an unorthodox ride, she feels that the experience has been a dream come true.

“I’ve made so many friends during this journey, everyone has been so supportive…I could never have dreamed of it at all… I'm very grateful for the way things have lined up, honestly I wouldn’t change a thing.”

PHOTO COURTESY OF SADDLE CREEK

HAYDAY 2021 DEBUT ALBUM

Album Reviews

DESIGNED BY ISABELLA KERN

Gloria - Sam Smith

Written by: Emilie Rush

In their fourth album, Sam Smith shines bright with “Gloria,” an ode to the romantic, the heartbroken, the lonely. The eleven track album comes out the gate with “Love Me More” Smith’s somber single released in April 2022 which is now even better in context with the rest of their work.

Smith wails into the mic in “How to Cry” making it a certifiable tearjerker. Four tracks later, Smith throws listeners a delightful bone. A song you can scream in the car, can dance along to; “I’m Not Here To Make Friends” is one of the year’s first musical triumphs.

With “Gloria,” Smith manages to create an emotional supernova with a beautiful balance of genres that proves that not only do they understand their listeners, but also that they’re starting to understand themselves. If you’ve got 33 minutes and want some music to fill your heart up, this one’s for you.

Rating: 7/10

This is Why - Paramore

Written By: Emma Bane

Paramore is back after a six-year sabbatical with their newest album, “This Is Why.” The tracks deliver all the angsty-funky-rock we’d expect from the band, producing a sonic experience that promises plenty of head banging and table dancing. Compared to other Paramore endeavors, though, “This Is Why” falls short of Hayley Williams’ range.

We know the punk rock queen’s voice and lyrical ability to be multifaceted and deep; so why are we left with songs like “C’est Comme Ça” that promise nothing but a laundry list of doctor’s orders? Other songs, like “Figure 8,” equally deliver interesting lyrics and a sound that feels truer to Paramore’s colors. While “This Is Why” isn’t “Brand New Eyes,” maybe it wasn’t meant to be; I appreciate Williams’ ventures into brand-new territory.

Rating: 7/10

Truth Decay- You Me at Six

Written By: Sabrina Standford

You Me at Six comes out with another record attempting a pop-punk revival - “Truth Decay.” This record goes back and forth. Some songs bring me back to the height of bands like All Time Low and Blink-182, while others feature lyrics that I can’t help but cringe at. The record does have a strong start with the hard-hitting banger of “Deep Cuts,” the ode to Gen Z - “God Bless The 90s Kids,” and the angsty heartbreak of “After Love In The After Hours.”

However, towards the middle of the record, all the songs start to blend together with not many defining factors in each track for listeners to differentiate between them. “Truth Decay” won’t be the record that reinstates pop punk, but it does pay a nice homage to the long lost genre.

Rating: 5/10

The Cannonballers- Colony House

Writtten By: Emma Dingus

“Cannonballers,” Colony House’s fourth album, while ambitious, ultimately makes a little splash. The album opens with “Landlocked Surf Rock” which is upbeat and will make you nostalgic for simpler times in the sun. However, it falls short in almost every other aspect, a common theme for the rest of this album. Many of the songs lack a depth to their lyrics and can feel very generic in their messages.

The album doesn’t have much to distinguish itself from the rest of the popular music being made today. But there are some redeeming qualities to this album. The band’s musical talent and versatility are showcased throughout the whole album. Two of my favorites from this album are “Everything” and “One of those Days.” Both of these songs are solid in almost all aspects and serve as a way for the band to show their writing abilities and versatility. Overall, you can see the effort put into “Cannonballers,” but much of it falls short.

Rating: 6.5/10

Desire, I Want To Turn Into You - Caroline Polachek

Written By: Ethan Dyrli

For the unfamiliar, meet Caroline Polachek, member of indie band Chairlift and a prolific songwriter, boasting songwriting credits for artists like Beyonce, Solange, Travis Scott, and Charli XCX. Her latest album, “Desire, I Want To Turn Into You,” is a must listen for 2023. Polachek taps into the best parts of modern pop, synth, drum and bass, combining them with an amalgamation of unique sounds to create a fresh listening experience.

No track on this record sounds the same, and yet they all gel together. Polacheck’s production is bold but intentional. Even the most surprising instrumentation finds its niche in this record, whether it’s the guitar on “Sunset” or the bagpipes on “Blood and Butter.” Tied together by Polachek’s sweet and modulating vocals, “Desire, I Want To Turn Into You” is a kind reminder of what is possible in a single album.

Rating 8/10

WRITTEN BY PJ RIDDELL DESIGN BY LILIANA MORA

one-room schoolhouse. Then there was a music building, but nowhere near as big [as the High Center].”

At “only 96 years old,” Sherk’s appearances on campus are like clockwork. But what makes returning so frequently worth it? One incentive is his love of research.

“I’m interested in research, so I started volunteering [at Messiah] at the archives, three days a week,” Sherk said. “I’ve been doing it for years.”

At nearly every Messiah basketball game at Hitchcock Arena, one seat is occupied by the same man - a man named Morris Sherk. Before Hitchcock, he faithfully showed up at Brubaker auditorium, and before that, it was Alumni Auditorium.

“I haven’t moved around much,” Sherk said of his consistent seating choice. “It’s up at the top, so I have a good view.”

In addition to a good view, the seat allows for interaction with students. For any student attempting to make their way past his top-row seat and up onto the indoor track, Sherk is always sure to jokingly ask if they have a ticket to enter.

“I enjoy humor,” Sherk said.

While his seating choice hasn’t changed much, the landscape of Messiah’s campus certainly has since Sherk was a student here from 1947 to 1949.

“The buildings, none of those buildings existed,” Sherk said. “There was Old Main, and then beside it there was a

Sherk’s love of research began as he spent a 33-year career locally as a ninth grade social studies teacher, while also authoring five books, publishing four. The unpublished book just so happens to be his autobiography, filled with memories of the places and people that came with his time spent at Messiah.

Of those memories, the most prevalent ones include a woman by the name of Janet Lehman, also a Messiah student, who would later become Sherk’s wife.

“She was a wonderful, wonderful woman,” Sherk said. “We met here at Messiah, and we were married in the old Alumni Auditorium.”

But time marches on. Sherk’s wife Janet passed away last spring, and the old Alumni Auditorium was demolished in 1972. Sherk’s memories of his wife, and his time as a student here, remain intact, and reason to keep coming back. Photos of his wife can still be found hanging on the walls of the archives today.

MORRIS SHERK

PHOTOGRAPHY COURTESY OF PJ RIDDELL

When not in the archives, Sherk spends his time on campus occupying that same seat in Hitchcock Arena when the basketball teams take the court - a constant in the midst of changes that come with the passing of time.

While Sherk has been retired now for longer than he was a teacher, loyal attendance at basketball games didn’t start just in retirement. He’s been in the stands since the men’s basketball program began in 1959, and the women’s program in 1979.

“I suppose [I’ve been coming] since they developed a varsity and started playing at other schools,” Sherk said. “I’ve been attending a long time.”

Current women’s basketball head coach Mike Miller can attest to Sherk’s constant support. Sherk and Miller both attended

the same church for a time, and Miller recalls how Sherk and his church community supported the team when he was a player in the early 1980s.

“When my wife and I started attending church at Mechanicsburg Brethren in Christ in 1984…I realized he was in the gym watching me play as a player,” Miller said. “A lot of people from that church were invested in following Messiah men’s basketball.”

Sherk’s support of Messiah basketball isn’t random - he was a forward for Messiah’s varsity team himself during his days as a student.

“When I was [at Messiah], I played basketball, but at that time they didn’t have a varsity that played other schools,” Sherk said. “We would play other pickup teams and maybe some church teams. I enjoyed it, good exercise.”

While the game of college basketball has evolved since Sherk donned a Messiah jersey, his love of the sport, and support for Messiah, remains. The steady success of the women’s basketball team has been particularly impressive to Sherk, playing a big role in bringing him back game after game.

“They’re just good, they’re a good team,” Sherk said. “I just enjoy watching them…if they weren’t very good, maybe I wouldn’t keep coming.”

BASKETBALL

JANET

For Mike Miller, having the support of Sherk as both a player and now as a coach signifies not only their on-court success, but also the faith-focus of the program.

“It’s a tangible reminder that we’re more than just a basketball team, we represent Christ,” Miller said. “People like Morris and his friends, I think that’s why they have embraced us over the years… we need to continue to work hard in maintaining that concept of playing for Christ, and seeing people like Morris in the stands helps us do that.”

PHOTO CAPTION Pick an arrow to point in the direction of whichever photo you're captioning. Feel free to change the color of the arrow to match the spread - just make sure it's not too light.

"They're just good. They're a good team."

-Morris Sherk

ALUMNI AUDITORIUM

MORRIS SHERK'S yearbook portrait from 1948

VARSITY 1949

PHOTOGRAPHY COURTESY OF BRETHREN IN CHRIST ARCHIVES

MILLER 1948

Chris Heisey

Messiah's Pro-Baseball Player

HEISEY PLAYING FOR MESSIAH COLLEGE Photos by Messiah University Athletics

HEISEY PLAYING MINOR-LEAGUE BASEBALL WITH THE CINCINNATI REDS Bill Florence / Shutterstock.com

WRITTEN BY PJ RIDDELL DESIGNED BY AMBER SWAISGOOD

ust across the hall from Hitchcock Arena, Chris Heisey’s red jersey stands out amidst all the other navy and white memorabilia in the hall. While Heisey’s jersey has been in the athletic hallway for some time, it wasn’t until this year that he was officially inducted into Messiah Athletics’ Hall of Honor - 17 years since his final game for Messiah baseball.

His induction recognizes the stellar career he had in Grantham. In three years with the Falcons from 2004 to 2006, Heisey smashed a number of program records, many of which still stand today, such as his record of 23 home runs and a career .405 batting average.

However, it’s not the records that Heisey remembers when he looks back at his playing days here.

“I still have lifelong friends from playing baseball there, it’s where I was playing when my dream of playing professional baseball became a reality,” Heisey said.

Heisey’s career with the Falcons was cut a year short in 2006. His dream came true when he was drafted in his junior year by the Cincinnati Reds in the 17th round of that year’s draft. He’s the first, and remains the only Messiah alum to play in the MLB - a key reason why his Reds jersey sits showcased across from Hitchcock today.

For Heisey, choosing between staying at college or playing professional baseball was simple.

“It wasn’t a super hard decision, but I did feel a little bad leaving the guys I had relationships with,” Heisey said. “The coach, Frank Montgomery at the time…he said ‘Listen, you’ve gotta go.’”

Four years after playing baseball and going to classes at Messiah, Heisey would find himself on the big stage, making his MLB debut in 2010.

Throughout eight years in the MLB, Heisey would play for the Cincinnati Reds, Los Angeles Dodgers, and the Washington Nationals. It was in the Nationals’ 2016 playoff run that Heisey would have what he recalls as the most memorable moment of his career.

“I hit a two-run home run in game five against the Dodgers,” Heisey said. “Just a special moment to finally feel like I got to help my team… the buzz in the crowd when I hit the home run…that’s probably my single best moment where I was most elated on the baseball field for my career.”

Before being scouted by the Reds, Heisey hadn’t considered playing professional baseball a realistic possibility, much less a true career in the MLB. His original plan couldn’t have been much farther from where he ended up.

“In high school, our assistant coach was a second grade teacher,” Heisey said. “He’s the one that turned me on to wanting to possibly do that as a career. I got to shadow him at the elementary school…and just fell in love with being a teacher.”

His teaching aspirations would be the driving force behind choosing to attend Messiah.

“Messiah had a very good education program,” Heisey said. “I was planning on just playing my four years of baseball and that was probably going to be it.”

His background in education still plays a role in his life today, despite never going back to the classroom.

“I don’t have my degree, but [I have] the training center I started with my brother,” Heisey said. “So I get to work with young kids, and share my knowledge of baseball with them, so it’s kind of the best of both worlds.”

Heisey’s training center provides skills training and mentorship for kids as well as older players. Heisey regularly invites Messiah’s

baseball team to train as he aims to be involved in the program that propelled him to his major-league dreams.

“I’m looking to get more involved here at Messiah with the baseball team,” Heisey said during his Hall of Honor induction speech. “I’m excited to see what’s next for the program.”

Current head coach Phill Shallenberger appreciates Heisey’s willingness to give back to the team.

“He cares deeply about Messiah baseball and the guys in it,” Shallenberger said. “He’s had our guys over to his house to hang out… he talks a lot about baseball, but also about being a believer who really wants to impact people, which really helps our guys from a mental side.”

For Heisey, playing for Messiah helped him build his faith, which helped him to stay centered around his Christian faith as he transitioned into Major League Baseball.

“The Christian aspect of Messiah gave me the foundation going into pro baseball to not be ashamed to tell people that I believe in Jesus,” Heisey said.

For his on-field achievements and continued support of the Messiah baseball program, Heisey is now the first and only baseball player inducted into the Hall of Honor.

"I'm so honored to be the first baseball player inducted into the Hall of Honor, and I hope that more will be inducted in the future," Heisey said.

"the buzz in the crowd when I hit the home run...

that's probably my single best moment where I was most elated on the baseball field"

-Chris Heisey

Messiah Cancels Easter Bunny Event

WRITTEN BY ETHAN DYRLI

tired of containing their longing. “3,2,1, go!” was met with freakish screams and a forward force of the crowd reminiscent of the running of the bulls.

Smith has since retired from Messiah, citing “creative differences” and “medical leave.”

Following the event, student journalists caught up with Harold Cunningham, one of the students involved in the hysteria. Cunningham, a self-described “free-thinker,” isn’t quite sure how the event turned so ugly.

“One minute I was scrolling through Instagram looking for more information about the Bunny Hunt, then the next thing I knew I woke up mid-sprint on the green space with a handful of duct tape, jelly beans, and plastic grass,” Cunningham said.

It’s important to note that smirch can also be used to describe the tarnishing of one’s character. For example: “The public health crisis caused by last year’s Easter Bunny Hunt will ‘smirch’ the school’s reputation in the community for years to come.”

“We apologize for our spelling mistake,” said Messiah in an official statement the following morning. “Regardless, we take no responsibility for unruly behavior that took place yesterday. In the future, we plan to both install riot-ready Safety officers at all events, as well as invest in a premium Grammarly account.”

Administration has since denounced the event and those students in attendance, sending each member of the crowd an email placing them on “disciplinary pronation.”

Drinking Allowed in Honor of St.Patrick's Day

WRITTEN BY MACKENZIE CHRISTIE

As the month of March rolls around, faculty and staff have been doing the most to ensure the festive spirit of Saint Patrick's Day is alive and well on our quiet campus. In a groundbreaking administrative move, it has been announced that drinking will be permitted – and encouraged – for the entire month of March to honor our patron saint.

According to sources close to the administration, the decision was made after a thorough study of the benefits of alcohol consumption for college students. The study, which was conducted by the Department of Higher Education and Alcoholics Anonymous, found that drinking can lead to increased emotional awareness, ease of suppressing unwanted memories, and circumstantially enhanced social skills.

To kick off the celebrations, there will be an exciting collaboration between Minds Matter and the Falcon Fitness Center on the importance of alcoholic hydration, organizing a shot-gun race for students to participate in between classes. Giveaway prizes for willing participants will be provided, such as boxed wine and Breathalyzer tests. EMT’s will also be available on the premises for moral support and potential medical evaluations.

The Union Cafe has added a new item to their menu for the month, called The Holy Spirits. Each 32oz drink is complete with a Four Loko, a Monster Energy and one shot of whatever your underpaid student employee chooses to throw in there. Your fate is in their hands.

*The Holy Spirits will be brought back for a limited time during finals week.

DESIGNED BY KATE TRIMBLE

Though some individuals are apprehensive about the new initiative, many faculty members hope to settle their worries, with a few words of encouragement.

One professor (who has chosen to remain anonymous) feels passionately that this celebration is not only in good faith to celebrate the holiday, but is an act of spiritual commitment as well.

“Remember when Jesus did that thing with the water? Biggest reason for me converting, I swear to you. Start drinking at noon and the spirit really starts talking to ya,” he said.

[redacted] refused to elaborate.

In an effort to inspire the masses to join in the celebrations, Flex the Falcon has made the impressive commitment to drinking alone in the center of the athletic field from the hours of 8pm to 3am. His willingness to set an example for the student body is admirable, despite the incoherency of his testimony. Unfortunately, upon waking the following day, Flex requested that his statements be omitted from the records.

Administration would like to make it very clear that though we are paying homage to the beautiful traditions of St. Patrick's day, there will be absolutely no behavior involving kissing one another solely on the basis of their ethnic group, as it remains a strict violation of the code of conduct. Anyone found wearing merchandise reading “Kiss me, I’m Irish” will be forcibly removed from the premises.

Remember to check your Messiah inbox regularly, as there will be an email coming out soon regarding similar festivities planned for the week of April 20th.