THE BUREAU OF A LITTLE TOO MUCH LITTLE ROCK February 7, 2018
The Honorable Justice A. Little Bit Court of Hindsight The United States Department of Burnout Little Rock, Arkansas, 72002 To Whom it May Concern: Everybody’s a little messed up, self-destructing little by little. A little lonely. A little too desperate. A little too you go on and on about your problems. A little too Van Gogh on the telephone. A little too you would Amazon Prime your ear to your primary lover. Too fickle. Too Faustian. A little too you would even sell your soul for soul food from Seamless. Even hang your soul on some earrings just to sell it on Pinterest. You’d like to be a little Instafamous. But you’re a little too Craigslistfamous. A little too MyFedLoansfamous. A little too unemployed. A little too sell your shoes to pay off the interest on your student loans. A little baseless. A little too alone. A little Skype date with all seven of your exes. A little swiping left too often. Swiping right too often. Swiping credit cards, too. Swiping a lot these days. Swiping yourself, too. Swiping yourself up and down. Swiping yourself to the bar and back. Home and back. Soulcycle and back. Now you’re becoming a little too Soulcycle. Your soul's a little too cyclical. Swiping yourself to the left. To the right. To the front. Take it back now ya’ll. Slide to the left. Slide to the right. Cha-cha real smooth. A little too smooth. A little too predictable. A little cover up, too often. Now you’re feeling a little flimsy. You’re feeling a little plastic. A little fragile. A little fake. A little displaced, like you’re floating on the surface of your existence. You start saying “existence” a little too often in casual conversations. You start talking about your “life” a little too often. A little too existential. A little too Sartre. Or is Sartre? A little too Gosh how do you even pronounce his name? What is a name? Who am I? You’re a little delicate. A little removed. A little like the top of creme brulee. You’re a little thin. A little vapid. A little wispy. A little communion wafer in the breeze. A little toupee caught in the leaves. So you look for some grounding. Your own serotonin. Some serotonin you can call your own. A little something you can wait for and have faith in. A little like the proverbial cherry on top. Yea, you wanna be a like the little cherry on top. You wanna be a proverb. A little full of yourself. A little too polished. A little less polarizing. But, a little too proverbial. A little too Famousquotes.com. So you go for a little sensation, in the end. A little don’t tell my mom. Something a little experimental. A little bong rip. A little rave. A little series of Tinder dates. A little under 30 in a little under 30 days. Little flings. A little too far flung. A little too sensational in the end. Now you’re at the end of the line. A little Coney Island of the mind. A little Candy Crush of hormones inside your body. A little ferris wheel ride of the soul. A little where-is-feel ride of the soul. A little dopamine. Some mean dope. Dope love, the mean way. Until you start getting a little too titillated, a little too faded, then a little ill, and finally a little ill fated. Until it’s a little too much--little by little by little--it’s a little too much to accept. 1