Adam Kozak
A NERDY
7:45 8:45 Valentine’s Day 9:50 When someone says “nerd,” 11:25 you think of someone who dresses up like Captain Kirk and speaks in Klingon, or someone who always carries an extra Atari 2600 controller in their pocket in case of gamer emergency. Generally, they are people who are too wrapped up in their own world to be among us normal people (who know that it’s all about Jersey Shore and Modern Warfare 3). Most importantly, come Valentine’s Day, they are the people who stand at the end of the gym talking about nerdy things, stare at girls creepily and cry themselves to sleep. Well, news flash. That’s not how it works with us (mostly). As a member of the nerd herd who desperately grips that last piece of normalness, I am going to clear up the issue of nerd’s Valentine’s Day once and for all. Here’s what really goes on in Geek Castle on World -1. Okay, so we do let out some water through the eyes. But hey, we have that right. We are anime people after all, and what’s an anime if a main character doesn’t cry at some point? At least we cry in the night when no one’s around and we leave it at that, all right? We’re not sob stories at Valentine’s Day; we just happen to interpret it differently. So what for you is Valentine’s Day, to us is “Awkward Silence Day.” Don’t judge, eat fudge.
10
Wake up to video game music. Get to school and realize it’s Valentine’s Day. Buy candy at Bear’s Den and promptly run to class. Sigh with relief that you can avoid an awkward in-class conversation about Valentine’s Day.
11:35 11:45
Meet up with nerd buddies and talk about nerdy things and give out candies.
11:55
Awkward silence ends with someone bringing up love and such, conveniently interrupted with an invitation to your house for a nerd party, to which everyone agrees without objection.
Get randomly interrupted by someone who loves Valentine’s much more than you; they wish everyone a good day without giving candy.
Rest of the day... Walk home with nerd buddies, conversapunctuated by awkward silence and 3:05 tion evil looks at the poor guy who mentions Valentine’s Day AGAIN.
3:15
Plop down in front of television to play Marvel vs. Capcom 3, Super Smash Bros., etc.
5:30
Awesome “Valentine’s Day” dinner (as announced by parents) spent in awkward silence (hating parents right now)
6:45 8:30 9:00 11:00
Sit down in front of TV again to watch anime. Say goodbye to friends. Go to bed. Wake up, cry.