Brockville 05 34 - final

Page 1

Independently owned & operated

1417 Maplewood Drive New Price $359,900! 2 storey/4 bedrms Breathtaking Home!!

C21burt@ripnet.com

VEHICLE WRAPS

Sales--Service--Installation

Helping You Make The Right Move!

PORTABLE RENTAL SIGNS

SPECIALIZING IN:

Issue 34

Rick Burt C.E.T. Sales Representative Direct: 613-498-7547

116 King Street W., Brockville, On

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Professional Championship Wrestling presents " Labour Day Beat Down". Live Pro Wrestling Saturday, September 1, 2012 at the Iroquois legion (24 Dundas St., Iroquois)

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Try not to become a man of success, but rather try to become a man of value. ~ Albert Einstein

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Empowering Thoughts

Forget about all the reasons why something may not work. You only need to find one good reason why it will.” ~ Dr. Robert Anthony

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A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women’s locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, ‘What’s the matter, haven’t you ever seen a little boy before?’

Every one of us has in him a continent of undiscovered character. Blessed is he who acts the Columbus to his own soul. ~ Unknown

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Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor, catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. ~ Mark Twain

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The Hypochondriac Danny was an extremely nervous patient whose imagination afflicted him with all kinds of misfortunes that never materialized. One afternoon he staggered into the house. He was bent forwards. He tottered to a chair and, still curled into a half-moon shape, dropped into it. ‘Jenny,’ he gasped, ‘it’s happened at last. There was no warning. All of a sudden I found I couldn’t straighten up. I can’t lift my head.’ When the doctor had arrived and looked at Danny, Jenny inquired, ‘Is there any hope, doc?’ ‘Well,’ the GP replied, ‘it would help a great deal if he would undo the third buttonhole of his waistcoat from the top button of his trousers.’

Want A Permanent Front Page Lug Location? Call Jon at McGuffy’s News 613-342-0428 jon@mcguffysnews.com

613-345-1482

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Brockville, On

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Second Beginnings

Start Up Bank Reconciliation Gov’t Remittances

Payroll-ROE’s-T4’s Source Documentation Monthly Financial Statements

Patricia Doucette Owner/Bookkeeper

613-246-6482

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Buy 1 lb. of fudge get 1/2 lb. !FREE! What Do You Want To Reflect?

“In The

Of Brockville”

Guys & Gals Full Service Salon

613-498-9898 Steph Saunders Owner howyouwear@bellnet.ca 165 King St W Brockville

Loving atmosphere Trims Baths Nails

Paula Fairfield 613-345-6220 Owner/operator By appointment only Brockville, On. www.mydoggroomerpawla.com

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Big Screen ~ NHL Package ~ NFL ~ Nascar Sundays

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Monday’s - Pool League 7pm Thurdays - Karaoke Fridays - Live Entertainment 8pm - 12pm

190 King St. W. Brockville 613-498-1566

The FBI Agents True story: FBI agents conducted a “search and seizure” at the Southwood Psychiatric Hospital, which was under investigation for medical insurance fraud. After hours of poring over many rooms of financial records, some sixty FBI agents worked up an appetite. The case agent in charge of the investigation called a local pizza parlor with delivery service to order a quick dinner for his colleagues. The following telephone conversation took place: Agent: Hello. I would like to order 19 large pizzas and 67 cans of soda. Pizza man: And where would you like them delivered? Agent: To the Southwood Psychiatric Hospital. Pizza man: To the psych hospital? Agent: That’s right. I’m an FBI agent. Pizza man: You’re an FBI agent? Agent: Correct. Just about everybody here is. Pizza man: And you’re at the psychiatric hospital? Agent: That’s correct. And make sure you don’t go through the front doors. We have them locked. You’ll have to go around to the back to the service entrance to deliver the pizzas. Pizza man: And you say you’re all FBI agents? Agent: That’s right. How soon can you have them here? Pizza man: And you’re over at Southwood? Agent: That’s right. How soon can you have them here? Pizza man: And everyone at Southwood is an FBI agent? Agent: That’s right. We’ve been here all day and we’re starving. Pizza man: How are you going to pay for this? Agent: I have my check book right here. Pizza man: You're all FBI agents? Agent: That’s right, everyone here is an FBI agent. Can you remember to bring the pizzas and sodas to the service entrance in the rear? We have the front doors locked. Pizza man: I don’t think so. Click.

HAVE A QUESTION? OR WANT A QUOTE? Email the Experts! thetireguy@riversideford.ca

Riverside Ford Sales Ltd Brockville, ON

Looking For Opportunities Look for new opportunities caused by your difficulties! A major earthquake struck Christchurch in February 2011 and caused massive damage in the region. Many businesses were forced to close and others suffered huge financial losses. The future looked difficult and Jamie Tulloch, the owner of E3, knew that if he did nothing his accounting practice would suffer. So Jamie began looking for new opportunities. Realizing that many of his clients would need help making insurance claims to their insurance companies, he offered expert advice that meant his clients could put in accurate and timely business insurance claims. This was useful for his clients and created a brand new source of revenue for his firm. Jamie also saw that thousands of trades people were going to be needed for many years to help rebuild Christchurch. And many of these people would be moving to Christchurch from other areas. So Jamie began running free seminar for trades people showing them how they take maximum advantage of the huge amount of new work that will be around for trades people. Many of these trades people found Jamie’s ideas useful and decided to use his accounting services. So Jamie now had dozens of new trades clients. The end result is that by looking for opportunities in unexpected problems, Jamie has just enjoyed his most successful and profitable year ever in business. Problems and set backs are a normal part of business. The key is what we do with them.

♪ •

The group’s name had numerous inspirations. Stuart Sutcliffe noted that a motorcycle gang in the film, “The Wild One,” was called ‘The Beetles,’ and John Lennon reportedly had a dream in which a man appeared “on a flaming pie,” saying, “You will be Beatles with an ‘a’.” The band members were also influenced by the name of Buddy Holly’s band, the Crickets.

The Beatles holds the top spot of album sales in the US (106 million), followed by Garth Brooks second (92 million), Led Zeppelin (83 million), Elvis Presley (77 million), and the Eagles (65 million). Worldwide The Beatles sold more than 1 billion records.

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Silly Quote

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Music Notes ♫

Sam’s August & September Line-Up:

Aug 24 City Limits Aug 25 4th Annual Sam’s

Sept 7 Whiskey Rocks Sept 14 Blues Highway

tickets boat cruise$35 p.p. (available at bar) Aug 31 Gypsy Moon Sept 21 The Journey Men Sept 1 Absolute Country Sept 28 Gypsy Moon 3-7pm

24 Perth St, Brockville, ON

(613)498 1919

Bizarre Laws Connecticut A pickle cannot actually be a pickle unless it bounces. Delaware It’s illegal to get married on a dare. Washington, D.C. It’s against the law to post a public notice calling someone a coward for refusing to accept a challenge to duel. Why didn’t Beethoven finish the Unfinished Symphony? Answer:

The Beatles

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Now they are about catching up with each other

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Families are like fudge... mostly sweet with a few nuts. •

Contrary to popular belief, the title for “Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds” was prompted by 4-year-old Julian Lennon’s description of a painting he brought home from school, not the drug, LSD. John Lennon has been said to have preferred Elton John’s rendition of the song, and played background guitar and backup vocals on John’s version, credited as “Dr. Winston O’Boogie and his Reggae Guitars.” Paul McCartney wrote “Hey Jude” for Julian Lennon, John’s son.

Call Jon (613) 342 0428 This double size ad is available for your business!


True Colors

Attitude

Statistics about Five

Art hath an enemy called ignorance. ~ Ben Jonson

Former Utah Jazz president, Frank Layden, commenting on a former basketball player, ‘I told him, ‘Son, what is it with you. Is it ignorance or apathy?’ The former player said, ‘Coach, I don’t know and I don’t care.’

Five is an unusual name, especially for an Elephant. With help from her keeper, Five has painted more than 50 works of art. Painting experts even think that her unique contemporary style is worthy of an exhibition. Her masterpieces are in demand and you could buy one at the West Midland Safari Park in Bewdley, Worcestershire. Back to that strange name, Five was one of three African Elephants that were brought to England from an elephant orphanage in South Africa - when she was five years old. She was 14 going on 15 in 2007. Elephant ages and maturity are not unlike humans, thus Five would now be considered a teenager in the elephant world.

Redundant Again protective helmet revert back small speck cold frost

Good Question How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?

I Have Learned I’ve learned that you shouldn’t go through life with a catchers mitt on both hands. You need to be able to throw something back. ~ Age 64

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Be Yourself To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

Descriptive Her voice had that tense, grating quality, like a first-generation thermal paper fax machine that needed a band tightened.

To Be An Astronaut Military service is not necessary to become an astronaut but it may be helpful. About two thirds of the United States Astronaut Corps from the Mercury Program through the Space Shuttle Program have had military backgrounds. Of the men who flew in the Mercury, Gemini, Apollo and Skylab Programs, which branch of the military was most represented?

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Crossword Solution

Open 7 Days a Week!

www.leedscountybooks.ca This area’s #1 supplier of river charts, topographical maps & regional books! Shop Online With Us

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Exhaust ~ Transmission Service We Help Keep Car Repairs Affordable!

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Facts About Ladybugs • •

• • • •

• •

Answer:

Great Summer Reading Titles!

Bumper Sticker

Ladybugs are beetles. There are nearly 5000 different kinds of ladybugs worldwide of which 400 ladybug species live in North America. A female ladybug is usually larger than the male. She will lay more than 1000 eggs in her lifetime. The average life cycle of the average ladybug is between 4 to 6 weeks. Some species can live for up to 2-3 years. As many as 6 generations of ladybugs may hatch in a year. Not all ladybugs are red with black spots. Some are orange or yellow with black spots. The hard wing cover protects the ladybug's fragile wings which are so thin you can see through them. There are special organs on ladybug's feet to help them smell. The ladybug uses it antennae to touch, smell and taste. Ladybugs are carnivores. They are found where there is a high insect pest population. Aphids are their favourite food. They will also feast on spider mites, mealy bugs, and scales. They are a gardener's friend. Ladybugs hibernate in the winter, sometime in people's homes. Ladybugs are not poisonous to humans. They will bite in self defense but won't hurt you.

Quick Quote

Eighty percent of success is showing up. ~Woody Allen

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Roofer

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Don't you hate the awkward moment when you profess your undying hate for a given profession or sport, and someone in your group is a diehard practitioner of said activity? Oops!

The United States Air Force

Awkward Moments

Courtney Sadler Owner 73 King St W Brockville, ON

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ROSEMARY’S OPTICAL SHOP

Rosemary Coleman Owner

• Quality Eyewear • Contact Lenses • Eye Exams Arranged • 24 Years of Experience

Itrix

51 King St. West, Brockville, ON

613 - 498 - 2200 Fax 613 - 498 - 2205

The Canadian Hearing Society • improve communication • improve safety in your home • assistive listening devices • hearing aid batteries

Phone 613-498-3933

TTY 1-877-817-8209

Or visit us at 68 William Street, Suite 205 Brockville, Ontario K6V 0A7

Check out what is happening daily for local community events @ www.mcguffysnewsbrockville.ca

Or submit your event to us to post on-line for FREE!

Aqua Plus Pools

“Your Bridge Over Troubled Water” Contact the Pool Experts today to Maintain your Pool or Spa on a Weekly/Bi-Weekly Maintenance Schedule. Adam Fish

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Professional Service Fireplaces ~ Inserts ~ Heat Pumps

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Owner

6 Beverly Street Spencerville, ON. 613-658-3101 1-888-370-9859 www.thestovestore.net thestovestore@ripnet.com

Brad Sharron, DD 65 George St. Brockville, ON

“Smile WITH CONFIDENCE!”

www.brockvilledentureclinic.com

Christie Aluminum Products

Denture Specialist • Complete - partial dentures • Relines • Repairs • Soft Liners • Implant dentures No Referrals Necessary!

Custom windows that are a perfect fit! An air tight investment! High quality, energy efficient vinyl windows and doors!

Excellent Service for over 14 Years! Dentures made on site = Time+Cost Effective Maximum benefits from the most advanced denture technology

900 Industrial Rd, Prescott Ontario 613-925-5374 (cell) 613-802-2874

A Fresh Perspective I Own It! Building Character Through Accountability Summer is nearly gone. Hard to believe, isn't it? And whether your district starts before or after Labor Day, the new school year is upon us. Parents and their kids are busy buying new school clothes, along with low tech #2 pencils and high-tech netbooks and computers. All to equip a young person—a future adult and leader—to have an outstanding year, no matter their grade. All well and good. But no matter how many tools and toys we send them off with, they will enter a bit of a jungle. Social pressures, academic competition, peers who don't live by the values you've taught your child, teachers and administrators who are fallible. Life. And in life—when humans are involved—we find some common threads. Whether it's in the family, the mom and dad's place of employment, or the world of school, there exists blame, complaining, victim thinking, and procrastination. And a lack of ownership. On the job, while our kids are at school, we "big people" hear and hopefully never make—unaccountable statements such as, "Not my problem!" "Not my job!" and "Not my department!" No ownership. This lack of ownership we see at work is also manifested through Incorrect Questions (IQs): "When will they tell us what's going on?" "Why don't I get paid more?" "Who dropped the ball?" "Why do we have to go through all of this change?" "When is that department going to do its job right?" Ouch! But imagine what our workplace would be like if people asked The Question Behind the Question (QBQ): "What can I do to help out?" "How can I be my best today?" "What can I do to add value?" "How can I practice ownership today?!"

Four Season Family Fitness Your In-Home Fitness Specialist!

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Golden Soles

Wouldn't that be great? To be an accountable person who takes ownership and 50% OFF to work with people who do the same? Well, it can happen. But instead of focusing Summer Footwear on training for adults in this QuickNote, let's allow our imaginations to run wild. & Accessories Picture this: Gift Certificates Middle and high schoolers fully equipped to practice personal accountability 46 King St East, Brockville, On Available taking ownership for their academic, relational, and athletic results! 613-342-7111 cell 613-340-6330 Instead of asking IQs like these: "Why do we have so much homework?" "When will my teachers be more fair?" "Why can't I get a job?" "Who's going to help me get into college?" Youth now learn to ask QBQs like these: Your Business Should STAND OUT! "How can I be a better student?" and it will in your LOCAL McGuffy`s! "What can I do to excel?" "How can I take ownership for all I do?" Call to place YOUR ad TODAY! 613.342.0428 "What can I do to serve others?" Now that would be the definition of "cool," right? DisSenio Freeates cou r’s It can be done. Just like adults on the job, young people can learn to be responnts Estim sible and avoid blaming, complaining, victim thinking, and procrastination. And though it starts at home with mom and dad Parenting the QBQ Way, every school can offer a little help along the way. And here's the tool they need to do so: I Own It! Building Character Through Personal Accountability Practical. New & Old - Drywall/Wood Powerful. Pithy. Not to mention engaging and fun. This ten lesson curriculum can Mike Dowdall, Owner thepainterman3@hotmail.com change young lives today. So please tell your superintendent, principal, and teachers about it because the goal is worthy: Pick up McGuffy’s News Building kids into accountable adults who take ownership for results. Brockville every week! Then someday, in the not too distant future, we'll have workplaces where perAdvertise here and reach sonal accountability abounds! Neat, huh? Lastly, here's a thought purchase I Own It! and donate it to your child's classover 7500 readers weekly room. Budgets are tight, 'ya know! Call Jon Thanks for helping! 613-342-0428

John G. Miller Author of ... ‘QBQ! The Question Behind the Question®’, ‘Flipping the Switch ... Unleash the Power of Personal Accountability’, ‘Outstanding! 47 Ways to Make Your Organization Exceptional’, http://www.qbq.com/ Denver, Colorado, USA 303-286-9900 John@QBQ.com

jon@mcguffysnews.com

Back to School Specials! Quality Refurbished Computers Starting @ $99.00!!


Residential Service

- Local Lines - $24.95 - Business Systems - Network Installation - $17.95 - 2 Lines - all features

voice2net.ca

Local Service Brockville (613) 704-1248 Kingston (613) 777-0355

ROSEMARY’S OPTICAL SHOP

Rosemary Coleman Owner

• Quality Eyewear • Contact Lenses • Eye Exams Arranged • 24 Years of Experience

Itrix

51 King St. West, Brockville, ON

613 - 498 - 2200 Fax 613 - 498 - 2205

The Canadian Hearing Society • improve communication • improve safety in your home • assistive listening devices • hearing aid batteries

Phone 613-498-3933

TTY 1-877-817-8209

Or visit us at 68 William Street, Suite 205 Brockville, Ontario K6V 0A7

Check out what is happening daily for local community events @ www.mcguffysnewsbrockville.ca

Or submit your event to us to post on-line for FREE!

Aqua Plus Pools

“Your Bridge Over Troubled Water” Contact the Pool Experts today to Maintain your Pool or Spa on a Weekly/Bi-Weekly Maintenance Schedule. Adam Fish

Affordable Pricing! Call us for details!

613-340-9556

613-213-1888

DON’T WAIT UNTIL IT’S TOO LATE!

We clean & service:

Professional Service Fireplaces ~ Inserts ~ Heat Pumps

Wood | Pellet | Gas | Propane Stoves

BOOK YOUR APPOINTMENT TODAY!!

Owner

6 Beverly Street Spencerville, ON. 613-658-3101 1-888-370-9859 www.thestovestore.net thestovestore@ripnet.com

Brad Sharron, DD 65 George St. Brockville, ON

“Smile WITH CONFIDENCE!”

www.brockvilledentureclinic.com

Christie Aluminum Products

Denture Specialist • Complete - partial dentures • Relines • Repairs • Soft Liners • Implant dentures No Referrals Necessary!

Custom windows that are a perfect fit! An air tight investment! High quality, energy efficient vinyl windows and doors!

Excellent Service for over 14 Years! Dentures made on site = Time+Cost Effective Maximum benefits from the most advanced denture technology

900 Industrial Rd, Prescott Ontario 613-925-5374 (cell) 613-802-2874

A Fresh Perspective I Own It! Building Character Through Accountability Summer is nearly gone. Hard to believe, isn't it? And whether your district starts before or after Labor Day, the new school year is upon us. Parents and their kids are busy buying new school clothes, along with low tech #2 pencils and high-tech netbooks and computers. All to equip a young person—a future adult and leader—to have an outstanding year, no matter their grade. All well and good. But no matter how many tools and toys we send them off with, they will enter a bit of a jungle. Social pressures, academic competition, peers who don't live by the values you've taught your child, teachers and administrators who are fallible. Life. And in life—when humans are involved—we find some common threads. Whether it's in the family, the mom and dad's place of employment, or the world of school, there exists blame, complaining, victim thinking, and procrastination. And a lack of ownership. On the job, while our kids are at school, we "big people" hear and hopefully never make—unaccountable statements such as, "Not my problem!" "Not my job!" and "Not my department!" No ownership. This lack of ownership we see at work is also manifested through Incorrect Questions (IQs): "When will they tell us what's going on?" "Why don't I get paid more?" "Who dropped the ball?" "Why do we have to go through all of this change?" "When is that department going to do its job right?" Ouch! But imagine what our workplace would be like if people asked The Question Behind the Question (QBQ): "What can I do to help out?" "How can I be my best today?" "What can I do to add value?" "How can I practice ownership today?!"

Four Season Family Fitness Your In-Home Fitness Specialist!

Pre & Post natal fitness Youth with special weight needs Nutrition education FITNESS for families FITNESS bootcamps Group & Individual training

personal training is our specialty

all calls in Canada and USA are free

Business Service

613-345-2110

Katie Ball CSEP-CPT, PFS

Voice over IP Service

www.fourseasonfamilyfitness.com 613-349-2210

Golden Soles

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Art hath an enemy called ignorance. ~ Ben Jonson

Former Utah Jazz president, Frank Layden, commenting on a former basketball player, ‘I told him, ‘Son, what is it with you. Is it ignorance or apathy?’ The former player said, ‘Coach, I don’t know and I don’t care.’

Five is an unusual name, especially for an Elephant. With help from her keeper, Five has painted more than 50 works of art. Painting experts even think that her unique contemporary style is worthy of an exhibition. Her masterpieces are in demand and you could buy one at the West Midland Safari Park in Bewdley, Worcestershire. Back to that strange name, Five was one of three African Elephants that were brought to England from an elephant orphanage in South Africa - when she was five years old. She was 14 going on 15 in 2007. Elephant ages and maturity are not unlike humans, thus Five would now be considered a teenager in the elephant world.

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To Be An Astronaut Military service is not necessary to become an astronaut but it may be helpful. About two thirds of the United States Astronaut Corps from the Mercury Program through the Space Shuttle Program have had military backgrounds. Of the men who flew in the Mercury, Gemini, Apollo and Skylab Programs, which branch of the military was most represented?

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Ladybugs are beetles. There are nearly 5000 different kinds of ladybugs worldwide of which 400 ladybug species live in North America. A female ladybug is usually larger than the male. She will lay more than 1000 eggs in her lifetime. The average life cycle of the average ladybug is between 4 to 6 weeks. Some species can live for up to 2-3 years. As many as 6 generations of ladybugs may hatch in a year. Not all ladybugs are red with black spots. Some are orange or yellow with black spots. The hard wing cover protects the ladybug's fragile wings which are so thin you can see through them. There are special organs on ladybug's feet to help them smell. The ladybug uses it antennae to touch, smell and taste. Ladybugs are carnivores. They are found where there is a high insect pest population. Aphids are their favourite food. They will also feast on spider mites, mealy bugs, and scales. They are a gardener's friend. Ladybugs hibernate in the winter, sometime in people's homes. Ladybugs are not poisonous to humans. They will bite in self defense but won't hurt you.

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The FBI Agents True story: FBI agents conducted a “search and seizure” at the Southwood Psychiatric Hospital, which was under investigation for medical insurance fraud. After hours of poring over many rooms of financial records, some sixty FBI agents worked up an appetite. The case agent in charge of the investigation called a local pizza parlor with delivery service to order a quick dinner for his colleagues. The following telephone conversation took place: Agent: Hello. I would like to order 19 large pizzas and 67 cans of soda. Pizza man: And where would you like them delivered? Agent: To the Southwood Psychiatric Hospital. Pizza man: To the psych hospital? Agent: That’s right. I’m an FBI agent. Pizza man: You’re an FBI agent? Agent: Correct. Just about everybody here is. Pizza man: And you’re at the psychiatric hospital? Agent: That’s correct. And make sure you don’t go through the front doors. We have them locked. You’ll have to go around to the back to the service entrance to deliver the pizzas. Pizza man: And you say you’re all FBI agents? Agent: That’s right. How soon can you have them here? Pizza man: And you’re over at Southwood? Agent: That’s right. How soon can you have them here? Pizza man: And everyone at Southwood is an FBI agent? Agent: That’s right. We’ve been here all day and we’re starving. Pizza man: How are you going to pay for this? Agent: I have my check book right here. Pizza man: You're all FBI agents? Agent: That’s right, everyone here is an FBI agent. Can you remember to bring the pizzas and sodas to the service entrance in the rear? We have the front doors locked. Pizza man: I don’t think so. Click.

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Looking For Opportunities Look for new opportunities caused by your difficulties! A major earthquake struck Christchurch in February 2011 and caused massive damage in the region. Many businesses were forced to close and others suffered huge financial losses. The future looked difficult and Jamie Tulloch, the owner of E3, knew that if he did nothing his accounting practice would suffer. So Jamie began looking for new opportunities. Realizing that many of his clients would need help making insurance claims to their insurance companies, he offered expert advice that meant his clients could put in accurate and timely business insurance claims. This was useful for his clients and created a brand new source of revenue for his firm. Jamie also saw that thousands of trades people were going to be needed for many years to help rebuild Christchurch. And many of these people would be moving to Christchurch from other areas. So Jamie began running free seminar for trades people showing them how they take maximum advantage of the huge amount of new work that will be around for trades people. Many of these trades people found Jamie’s ideas useful and decided to use his accounting services. So Jamie now had dozens of new trades clients. The end result is that by looking for opportunities in unexpected problems, Jamie has just enjoyed his most successful and profitable year ever in business. Problems and set backs are a normal part of business. The key is what we do with them.

♪ •

The group’s name had numerous inspirations. Stuart Sutcliffe noted that a motorcycle gang in the film, “The Wild One,” was called ‘The Beetles,’ and John Lennon reportedly had a dream in which a man appeared “on a flaming pie,” saying, “You will be Beatles with an ‘a’.” The band members were also influenced by the name of Buddy Holly’s band, the Crickets.

The Beatles holds the top spot of album sales in the US (106 million), followed by Garth Brooks second (92 million), Led Zeppelin (83 million), Elvis Presley (77 million), and the Eagles (65 million). Worldwide The Beatles sold more than 1 billion records.

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Contrary to popular belief, the title for “Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds” was prompted by 4-year-old Julian Lennon’s description of a painting he brought home from school, not the drug, LSD. John Lennon has been said to have preferred Elton John’s rendition of the song, and played background guitar and backup vocals on John’s version, credited as “Dr. Winston O’Boogie and his Reggae Guitars.” Paul McCartney wrote “Hey Jude” for Julian Lennon, John’s son.

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Issue 34

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The Hypochondriac Danny was an extremely nervous patient whose imagination afflicted him with all kinds of misfortunes that never materialized. One afternoon he staggered into the house. He was bent forwards. He tottered to a chair and, still curled into a half-moon shape, dropped into it. ‘Jenny,’ he gasped, ‘it’s happened at last. There was no warning. All of a sudden I found I couldn’t straighten up. I can’t lift my head.’ When the doctor had arrived and looked at Danny, Jenny inquired, ‘Is there any hope, doc?’ ‘Well,’ the GP replied, ‘it would help a great deal if he would undo the third buttonhole of his waistcoat from the top button of his trousers.’

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