The McGill Tribune Vol. 24 Issue 3

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M c G ill T rib u n e |

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OP/ED: Time you enjoy wasting is never time wasted

Curiosity delivers. Vol. 24 Issue 3

CAMPUS: Bend that gender, baby, UGE'II back you up

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SPORTS: Wanna impress your boy? Learn sports babble

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Tuesday, September 14, 2004

PUBLI SHED BY THE STUDENTS' SOCI ET Y OF M C G I L L UNI VERSI TY

Chartwells claims one more University fails to live up to promises m a d e last ye a r HEATHER H A Q LAW RENCE P rivate fo o d s e rv ic e p ro v id e r C h a rtw e lls has a d d e d an o th e r cam p us e a te ry to its ev e r-e xp a n d in g ranks. O n S ep tem be r 1, the c o m p a n y assum ed o p e ra tio n o f the M c G ill Bookstore's s eco nd -flo or c a fé fro m the university's D ep artm ent o f Food Services.

"C h a rtw e lls is a n a tio n w id e fo o d s e rv ic e p ro v id e r th a t is b e tte r e q u ip p e d to m a n a g e the c a fé ," said M a n a g e r J ackie M e rse re a u .

This h a n d o v e r de fie s prom ises the university m a d e to the student le a d ­ ers o f the C o a litio n fo r A c tio n on Food

S ervices last M a rc h . The shift in o w n ­ ership is p a rt o f a recent trend in w h ic h fo rm e rly in d e p e n d e n t o r student-run ca fe te ria s ha ve fa lle n u n d e r the m an­ a g e m e n t o f C h a rtw e lls.

Last year, m em bers o f the M c G ill com m un ity fo rm e d C A FS in response to the trend, o rg a n iz in g boycotts a n d a w a re n e ss c a m p a ig n s o n cam pus.

In M a rc h , C A FS led a m ovem ent th at pe rsu a d e d the M c G ill a d m inistra­ tion to d e la y the p la n n e d te n d e rin g o f m a n a g e m e n t contracts fo r 1 6 cam pus cafe teria s. A t the tim e, V ice-P rincipal See CHARTWELLS, page 6.

Making the musée Anglo-franco Ontarian Marc Mayer cultures Montreal J U L IE PETERS C a n a d ia n a r t p la y s a h u g e ro le in d e fin in g o u r fe e lin g s fo r o u r c o u n try . It is tn e a rtis ts w n o fe e l a s e n s e o f th e p la c e w h e r e th e y liv e .

T h e y e x p re s s th e fe e lin g s o f th e ir d a ily life a n d th e ir o w n c u ltu ra l id e n tity . S o it is a p p r o p r ia te th a t th e M u s é e D 'A r t C o n te m p o r a in d e M o n tr é a l is a b o u t to b e ta k e n o v e r b y a n a n g lo - fr a n c o p h o n e — w h a te v ­ e r th a t is.

M a r c M a y e r , th e n e w ly -n a m e d d ir e c to r o f th e A A A C M , w a s b o rn in S u d b u ry , O n ta r io . H e s tu d ie d h is to ­ r y a n d a r t h is to ry a t M c G ill, th e o h -

s o -a n g lo c e n tre o f a n g lo M o n tr e a l.

H o w e v e r, his F re n c h is p e rfe c t, a n d h e v ie w s h is re tu rn to M o n tr e a l a s " a b it o f a h o m e c o m in g ." A re g u la r A A A C M v is ito r b a c k w h e n it w a s o c c u p y in g its m u c h s m a lle r C ité -d u H a v re s p a c e , M a y e r a s se rts , "It w a s h e re , 2 0 y e a rs a g o , th a t m y in te lle c tu a l life b e g a n ."

M a y e r is ta k in g th e A A A C M d ir e c t o r re in s fr o m M a rc e l B ris e b o is , w h o is re tirin g a fte r 1 9 y e a rs a t th e m u se u m 's heTm. H is firs t g o a l is to e x a m in e th e c o lle c tio n s a n d m a k e s u re th e re is n o th in g m iss­ in g . F o r M a y e r , a rt is a b o u t th e p u b lic . H e d o e s n o t w a n t a m u se ­ um to te ll p e o p le w h a t th e y a r e s u p

p o s e d to s e e , b u t ra th e r to in tro ­ d u c e th e m to s o m e o f th e in te re s tin g n e w tre n d s in c o n te m p o r a r y a rt. H e a ls o w a n ts to fo c u s a little m o re o n a d v e rtis in g . B ut th e g r e a t a r t c o lle c ­ tio n s a r e n o t c o n c e iv e d th ro u g h o n e m in d a lo n e . M a y e r w a n ts to f o llo w th e c u ltu r a l n e e d s a n d d e s ire s o f a ll M o n tre a le rs . " If th a t re q u ire s m a k in g s o m e c h a n g e s , th e n s o b e it," h e d e c la re s .

M a y e r h a s w o r k e d w ith c o n ­ te m p o r a r y a r t a ll o v e r th e w o r ld , m o s tly in C a n a d a , th e U n ite d S ta te s a n d E u ro p e . H e h a s re c e n tly

The d e a d lin e fo r registering to vote a n d requesting a n absentee b a llo t if y o u 're a n A m e rican o r Australian citizen is fast a p p ro a c h in g . Turn to p a g e 2 to rea d a b o u t voter recruitment drives taking p la c e on cam pus.

Dem ocrats A b ro a d is a m o n g the groups c lam orin g for y our support.

See N E W D IR E C T O R p a g e 17.

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C A M P U S NEWS

Voter registration d ead line looms for Am erican students Absentee ballot request must be m ailed by tom orrow JAMES GOTOWIEC As v a ry in g d e a d lin e s fo r registering to vote absentee a p p ro a c h , the 1,5 0 0 -p lu s A m e rican s a t M c G ill must d e c id e w he the r they w ill have their say in the N o v e m b e r presidential election.

A c c o rd in g to D em ocrats A b ro a d , an o rg a n i­ za tio n o f D e m ocratic Party m em bers livin g outside the U nited States, A m e rican s resid ing in fo reig n countries should m a il in their Federal Postcard A p p lic a tio n (FPCA) b y to m orro w . The FPCA both registers citizens to vote a n d pro vides absentee ballots.

Though the d e a d lin e fo r re c e ip t o f m ailed-in ab se nte e b a llo t requests varies b y state, som e are as e a rly as O c to b e r 2 . Registering to vote a n d requesting a n abse nte e b a llo t e a rly ensure that absentee votes a re receive d a n d counted.

Emily Zitter-Smith, a Ph.D. student in Islam ic Studies a n d a m em ber o f D em ocrats A b ro a d , said that m any A m e rican s d o n 't e x p e c t the registration d e a d lin e to arrive so early.

"There do e sn 't seem to have been a lo t o f ed u ca tio n a b o u t it," she s a id * "It seems like it w o u ld b e v e ry c o m p lic a te d , w h e n in fa c t it's no t."

To in cre a s e a w a re n e ss , Zitter-Sm ith has aske d th at the M c G ill In tern ationa l Students'

N e tw o rk a le rt m em bers to the d e a d lin e through its listserv.

"M IS N is not a p o litic a l a sso cia tio n ," e m p h a ­ sized President Jason Blank. "H o w ever, w e w e re c o n ta cte d b y a num ber o f p e o p le " a b o u t raising aw a rene ss o f the vote.

A ustralian students livin g overseas a re also g e a rin g up fo r an O c to b e r 9 ge n e ra l electio n.

W h ile vo tin g in A ustralian elections from overseas is not com pulsory, fa ilu re to vote m a y result in rem oval from the electora l enrolm ent rolls.

The tig h t US ra c e b e tw e e n R ep ublican President G e o rg e W . Bush a n d D em ocratic c h a l­ le ng er John Kerry, c o u p le d w ith the razor-thin g a p in the vo tin g results o f the 2 0 0 0 electio n, has led D em ocrats A b ro a d a n d other o rg a n iza tio n s to a rra n g e la rg e voter registration drives all across C a n a d a , in cluding som e on the M c G ill cam pus.

N evertheless, it is d e b a ta b le if students w ill b e m otivated enough to vote.

"The p e rce ive d closeness o f an election does a ffe c t turnout, but not as m uch as p e o p le ty p ic a lly s u p p o s e ," s a id P o litic a l S c ie n c e Professor Elisabeth G id e n g il, c o-director o f a 2 0 0 4 C anadi­ an electio n study. "This is because m a ny p e o p le vote ou t o f a sense o f duty. For those w h o d o n 't feel a strong sense o f duty, w h a t counts is the per­ ce ive d closeness o f the electio n, the costs o f vot­

in g, a n d h o w m uch they ca re a b o u t the ou tcom e ."

G id e n g il speculate d . that y o u n g A m ericans w h o c a re a b o u t w h ic h pa rty w in s the W h ite H ouse w ill vote in the u p co m in g election.

"Presumably, the 2 0 0 0 e x p e rie n ce w ill have e n h a n c e d som e US students' perce ptions that their vote coun ts— a n d if they ca re a b o u t the outcom e, this w ill p ro b a b ly o u tw e ig h the 'co st' o f o b ta in in g an absentee b a llo t," she said.

A p p ly in g to vote absentee do es involve p a p e rw o rk a n d a fe w trips to the post o ffic e , but the process hasn't d issua ded m ost students from registering.

"I d o plan to v o te ,” s a id Em ily V ogel, a U1 M a n a g e m e n t student from W is c o n s in . "I registered to vote b e fore I ca m e [b a c k to M o n tre a l], an d since I a rrive d I sent in m y a p p lic a tio n fo r an ab se nte e b a llo t." ■ - W ith files from Jennifer Jett

The F e d e ra l P ostcard A p p lic a tio n is a v a ila b le o n J in e a t w w w .fv a p .g o v . To fin d o u t w h e n y o u r s ta te s m a il-in re g is tra tio n d e a d lin e is, v isit w w w , overseasvote2004.com / re g d e a d lin e . html.

Visit w w w .a e c .g o v .a u fo r in fo rm a tio n o n v o tin g in th e A u s tra lia n e le c tio n .

What Is the McGill Undergraduate Student Fund?

Though a student referendum in March 2004 we, the undergraduate students, decided to continue the long established tradition of making donations to the University where we need it the most. As a result, the McGill Undergraduate Student Fund (MUSF) combines several fees collected by the Students' Society of McGill University (SSMU) on behalf of various McGill organizations to address three needs on campus: better libraries, more student bursaries and support for campus-wide initiatives.

McGill Alumni donors match the SSMU Bursary and Library Improvement Fund dollars, doubling the impact of student dollars on campus, as well as donate $5,000 towards the SSMU Campus Life Fund! .

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The MUSF donations total $19 per semester which is broke up into its constituent parts as follows:

SSMU Bursary Fund: SSMU Library Improvement Fund: SSMU Campus Life Fund:

$8.50 FT/ $4.25 PT per semester $8.50 FT/ $4.25 PT per semester $2.00 FT/ $J.OO PT per semester

II

B ring yo u r s tu d e n t id !

J

BENJI FELDMAN

"Hey! I have that poster in my room!"

W ell, if it's the same reprint of Vincent Van Gogh's "Starry N ight" tnat you bought from Inaginus, w hat do you expect?

Traveling poster distributor Imaginus held its bi-annual poster sale in the Shatner ballroom for three days last week.

The above poster, entitled "Kiss (Two Girls)" by Tanya Chaikin, is a hot seller every time.

Imaginus faced some aggressive com­ petition, however, from Barewalls.com, an on-line poster com pany whose representa­ tives passed out handbills.

W hat Is an Opt-out?

This is a process by which, if you so choose not to support the above fees, you may choose to have these fees credited back to you on your McGill fee statement.

W hat Do I have to do?

All SSMU members (undergraduate students) are eligible for this opt-out.

This Opt-out is valid for the 2004-2005 academic year (both semesters).

CO TO Room 1203 in the Brown Student Services Building (next to the SSMU offices) between 10am and 4pm: S e p te m b e r 2 0 th

to th e 2 4 th

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the m cgill tribune | 14.9.04 | news

NEWS ANALYSI S

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M o m , Dad. b ro th e r, sister, uncle, a u n t, fa m ily ,

No way out

friends.....HOM E?

Lack o f evacuation procedure in Shatner m ay endanger students with physical disabilities

F riends, going o ut, grades. T .A % profs, rezlife, M o n tre a l.. ..H O M E ?

LISA VARANO

IS CUTTING THE CORD JUST NOT CUTTING IT ? We’re here to listen.

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ne afternoon last semester, students w e re lunching on the usual cafe teria fare o f spring rolls a n d club sand w ich es on the seco nd flo o r o f the Shatner U niversity C entre w h e n a fire alarm w e n t off.

A student w h o uses a m otorized w h e e lc h a ir tried to evacua te b y crossing into the B row n b u ild in g from Shatner. W h a t he discovered has raised questions a b o u t h o w physically d is a b le d p e o p le should evacua te the interconnected build in gs if there is a fire. . . . , “ I tried to use the elevators in the B row n b u ild in g , but they w e re all closed, said the student, w h o asked not to b e id en tified. . . , .

Trap pe d in the b u ild in g , he w a ite d fo r the fire d e pa rtm e nt to arrive. The alarm w a s discovered to b e taise.

Joan W o lfo rth , director o f the O ffic e for Students w ith D isabilities, s a id th at she previously thought the a d jo in in g bu ild in gs ha d separate fire alarm systems, but learned otherw ise.

"A b o u t a y e a r a g o , the tw o bu ild in gs w e re tw in ne d so th a t... w h e n the elevators g o d o w n in Shatner, they also g o d o w n in B row n, w h ic h m eans that the evacua tio n plan o f m o ving from o n e b u ild in g to another, d e p e n d in g on w h ic h on e has the fire, is lost, she said.

O n c e a fire alarm go es off, elevators g o d o w n to the basem ent b y de fau lt because elevator shafts can attract sm oke a n d be co m e da ng erou s if there is an actu al fire.

Four M c G ill students use w heelchairs, w h ile a b o u t six ha ve m obility problem s such as d ifficulty w alkin g^ A n a d d itio n a l 2 0 have vision im pairm ents. A c c o rd in g to W o lfo rth , these students a n d other physically d isa b le d p e o p le a t M c G ill m a y require assistance d u ring an evacuation.

She s a id it is p ro b le m a tic that Shatner, a b u ild in g o w n e d b y the university but rented to the Students Society, is not p ro p e rly e v acua ted w h e n fire alarm s ring, e spe cially consid erin g that the U niversity C entre is a hub o f student activity a n d frequented b y d isa b le d students. " W h a t is d is q u ie tin g ... a b b u t these tw o build in gs is th a t... because the S S M U functions as a separate

-^ T T H h

N ightline 3 9 8 -M A I N (398-6246)

Nowyou made her cry!

This could have been avoided if you were saving money with your Student Passport

*n o te : o n ly o n e b a b y w as h a r m e d in th e m a k in g o f this a d

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Get yours today @ Campus Stores or Online

BENJI FELDM AN

Shatner's d isabled-unfrien dly design could m ean disaster in th e e v e n t of an em ergency.

Ail deals in Student Passport are REUSABLE until next August

entity, not p a rt o f the university, there a p p e a rs to b e no p ro ce du re that has been a d o p te d b y the S S M U ab o u t

11

e v a c u a tio n ," she said . . , . , . v.

S S M U C lubs a n d Services Sam een Shahid, the b u ild in g m a na ge r o f Shatner, a c k n o w le d g e d that the U niversity C en tre lacks p ro p e r fire safety protocol.

"D oes S S M U have a fire evacua tio n procedure? A t the mom ent, no ," she said.

M c G ill Security to ld S S M U G e n e ra l M a n a g e r Pauline G e rv a is that it w ill a p p o in t a fire m arshall tor Shatner, w h o w o u ld b e responsible fo r evacua tin g the b u ild in g , in Septem ber o r O cto be r, said S hahid. S ince this assertion w a s m a de b a ck in June, no discussion has taken pla ce . ' W o lfo rth s a id that university bu ild in gs la ck fire-safe spaces, know n as C o iffu r e refuge areas, w h e re those in need o f evacua tio n assistance ca n safely w a it to b e rescued fo r up to 4 5 minutes.

"M c G ill has not been ve ry g o o d a t either establishing o r including refuge areas that conform to the stipulated requirements in a n y o f its b u ild­ in gs," she said . "S o there a re n 't in fa c t ve ry m a ny places a t M c G ill w h e re ¥ « $hfc wiitcvnM! U* %is»l (■» ;*( you w o u ld have som ething that conform s to the true d e fin ition o f a refuge aar location: a re a ."

H ow ever, the university does m ention d isa b le d p e o p le in its evacua­ SB® SH EM R M K ! WIST

Pierre B a rb e r

tion procedure: " W ith the assistance o f your flo o r searcher(s) a n d a n y other evacua­ tion m onitors, p ro vid e h e lp to those so requiring, [fo r ex a m p le ] persons w ith disa bilities o r injuries," reads the docum ent, a v a ila b le on M c G ill's W e b site. "O n c e outside y our b u ild in g ... a d v is e ... o f a n y matters requiring fur­ ther attention, [that is] p e o p le tra p p e d o r requiring specia l assistance to e v a c u a te ." , University Fire Prevention O ffic e r A lin e Fontaine d e clin e d to com m ent o n this procedure.

Jason Blank, U 3 S o c io lo g y a n d C h e m ica l E ngineering, sits on the Senate subcom m ittee on students w ith disabilities a n d said that the univer­ sity is d ra g g in g its feet on im proving fire safety procedures for d isa b le d pe op le.

"If there’s no interest [from ] students, then this is g o in g to d ra g tore\c er," he said . "These are students like y o u a n d me in this school. If there's a problem , they a re g o in g to b e a t a d isa d v a n ta g e a n d they m a y d ie because of it— this is not a c ce p ta b le . " ■

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CLOTHING - SERVICES

Atlantis 8 free entrances Club Biu 8 free entrances Blue dog 24 free entrances Boodha Bar 8 free entrances Café Campus 24 free entrances Dome 6 free entrances Extreme 6 free entrances Jupiter Room free concerts La Boom 6 free entrances Nexxt 6 free entrances Saphir 48 free entrances Vatican 6 free entrances

Boutique Fly 10% off Cinéma Du Parc free

BARS Cock & Bull Free p*nt w / Pitcher Comedy Nest 2 x 1 Admission Le Swimming 6 free hrs. Pool Peel Pub 2 for 1 60oz p’ tchers Trix 4 sh**ters + 60oz p*tcher for

$15

popcorn + soda Dex 15% off $50 or more Juan E.H. 15% off or 10% off discounted merchandise Movieland 2 for 1 rentals Tadaa 25% off monthly w ireless hi-speed internet plan Tonic free in-chair massage, hand treatment Uniprix 10% off Voyages Campus free cancellation insurance ($30 value) RESTAURANTS Burger King 20% off ail purchases Carlos and Pepes 15% off Dominos 2nd pizza $0.49 Just noodles 10% off, 2 for 1 Tuesday La Iguana Free maragrita w / meal Métro Discounted b**r when buying

large quantities Marché Movenpick 20% off Place Milton free juice w/ breakfast Tiki ming free soda snI meal Subway 2 for 1 6” sub w / drink and 2

for 1 breakfast wrap w/ coffee Second Cup 15% off $5 or more

- ^ “ L u ip m

T im s to m

CLUBS

& Û 0 a m to fcûüpi»

S a r is m la r . H i i f a n * U i 3 * X f e m

w w w .s tu d e n t-p a s s p o rt.c o m

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n e w s j 14.9.04 j the m cgill tribune

new s1

CAMPUS

NEWS

Where everybody knows your nam e

Are you nosy?

Write for news. tribnews@tribune.mcgill.ca

... Okay, m aybe n o t Gert's isn't exactly Montreal's

T e a c h E n g lis h W o r ld w id e !I I F R E E In fo N i g h t I M o n r f a y @ Tfprm, D a y s I n n

hotspot, but proposed changes could liven It up CHRISTINE CULLEN

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McGill Faculty of Arts Internship Office

You are invited to attend an Information Session for:

Th e Faculty of Arts Internship Program

Wednesday, September 29th, 2004 Leacock, Room 232 2:00 p.m. to 4:00 p.m.

Wine and cheese reception to follow r Come and find out about the Arts Internship Program. Hear fellow students talk about the highlights and challenges of their internship experiences, what they learned, and how they plan to apply their experience to their field of study.

All Arts Faculty and Students a re w elcom e.

For more information contact

angfetMmffl®mc3i<cp

Faculty of Arts Internship Office, Peterson Hail, room 314

U .S . C i t i z e n s

Apply for your absentee ballot When: Monday September 13 to September 17, 11-2 Where: Leacock, first floor, near the elevators W hat to bring: your passport or your passport number Information about applying for an absentee ballot can also be found at: www.overseasvote2004.com In most states, absentee ballot applications must be received at least 30 days in advance of the election. Apply now to vote in November!

This ad sponsored by Debbie Moskowitz, David Zuroff, Debra Titone and Robert Vincent.

O n Thursday nights, students line up outside G e rts Pub in the basem ent o f the Shatner University C entre, jockeying fo r a spot on the c ro w d e d guest list.

M o s t other nights, how ever, students have no trouble fin d in g a table.

In M o n tre a l, a c ity know n fo r its nightlife, m ost M c G ill students choose to venture o ff cam pus a n d e n jo y the best the c ity has to offer. Few p la c e the cam ­ pus b a r on their list o f favourite w a te rin g holes.

"There are de fin ite ly better places in M o n tre a l to g o that have a better beer selection," s a id M a tth e w D orreen, U 3 Political S cience a n d A nthrop ology. "It's also fa r from w h e re I live, but if I’m stuck on cam pus, then it's o k a y I guess."

H ow ever, student representatives a n d the staff a t G ert's s a id that the b a r is an im portant p a rt o f university life at M c G ill.

"G ert's is a student a re a ," said A nthon y Di C a rlo , Students' S ociety vicepresident o f operations. " W e k n o w that IW O N A LINK there are bars out in the c ity w ith differ­ S o m e students dislike G ert's' im personal and M o lso n -stu d d ed atm osphere. ent atm ospheres, but this is your b a r— you c a n m ake it w h a t y o u w a n t." out w h a t they w o u ld like to see ha pp en that G ert's is a refuge fo r M c G ill stu­ The pu b's m ost p o p u la r event a t G ert's, s a id Di C a rlo . dents. rem ains Thursday N ig h t Tradition.

S om e o f the ideas in the w orks for " W e can o ffer a m uch safer envi­ "If y o u stay until 3 a m o n a the y e a r in clude h o ld in g m ore them e ronm ent for students to have fu n," he Thursday, the fighting outside G ert's can nights a n d selling b u b b le tea in a d d itio n s a id . " N o b o d y w ill take a d v a n ta g e o f b e q u ite e n jo y a b le ," jo k e d C h a rlie to the usual beer a n d m ixed drinks. O n e yo u here, a n d security w o n 't b e a t you Brackett, U 3 S ociology. possible them e nigh t is M o n d a y N ig h t u p ," som ething Thom as s a id has been Di C a rlo s a id that plans a re under­ Football. know n to ha p p e n in som e M o n tre a l w a y to m ake G ert's m ore a p p e a lin g to " W e have a lot o f screens, a n d bars. students, s p e c ifica lly clubs a n d student w e 'll have the sounds p la y in g in the Both Di C a rlo a n d Thom as a g re e d groups. b a ck g ro u n d ," Di C a rlo said. that students should not lo o k a t G ert's as " W e a re spea king to clubs a n d Bar m a n a g e r Vincent Thom as said be in g just another bar. getting input from student g ro up s" to find "The m oney spent here w ill pro vid e o th e r service s fo r students [th rou gh S S M U ]," s a id Thomas.

O n e reason w h y students m ay choo se to frequent other bars is the limit­ e d beer selection— M o ls o n m onopolizes the menu. But Thom as denies that this has led fe w e r students to co m e to G ert's.

S S M U s e ts u p s a n d w ic h s e r v ic e "Price is a b ig g e r issue fo r stu­ dents," he said , "a n d M o ls o n is the best d e a l."

DAVID M. NATAF Som e students s a id G ert's w o u ld benefit from a m ore tra dition al pu b A n e w student-run c a te rin g atm osphere. s ervice w ill fill the v o id left in stu­ "I think G ert's w o u ld d o better if it ha d the rep o f Thom son H ouse," said dents' stom achs b y Pita Pit's d e p a r­ Paul Butler, U 3 Religious Studies an d ture fro m the b a se m e n t o f the History, w h o suggested having m ore S hatner U niversity C e n tre . beers on tap.

Pita Pit o c c u p ie d a s p a c e in G ert's customers like Butler have G ert's Pub fo r tw o years, d u rin g va rie d vie w s on the role the b a r plays. w h ic h tim e the Students' S ocie ty "It's a p la c e w h e re you can hang c o lle c te d a com m ission. out d u ring the d a y as o p p o se d to a n y "T h e y w e re no t w illin g to other b a r in M o n tre a l, w h e re you can n e g o tia te a t the sam e ra te ," said o n ly ha ng out a t n ig h t," saia D aniel S S M U Vice-President O p e ra tio n s C ostantino, U 3 G e o g ra p h y . "I com e A n th o n y D i C a rlo . "It w a s a d e c i­ here betw een classes a n d ha ng out w ith sion o f bo tto m lin e ." friends."

In its p la c e , S avoir Fare is sell­ A n d it's not o n ly students w h o com e ing s a n d w ich e s from Pita Pit's o ld to G ert's. Barry O 'C o n n e ll, co-producer lo ca tio n . The n e w lunch counter o f next month s pe rform an ce o f the Rocky sells s a n d w ich e s a n d souvlaki for IW O N A LINK H o rror Picture S h o w in the Shatner a b o u t $ 4 , a n increase from Pita University C entre, said the best thing Pit's p rice s. It a lso p ro vid e s c a te rin g she s a id , the s a n d w ic h stand m igh t a b o u t G ert's is its lo ca tio n. . services to the M c G ill com m un ity b e m o re c h a lle n g in g .

"It's g o t a g re a t location, right on a n d residences, a n d supplies the "This is a n extension o f the cam p us," he s a id as he shared a pitch­ c h ild re n a t the S S M U d a y c a re w ith S a v o ir f a r e c a te rin g s e rv ic e ... er o f beer a t the bar, "a n d it's g o t a chill m eals a n d snacks. [a n d ] a n outlet fo r th e O rg a n ic vibe , very relaxed."

S S M U w ill re c e ive the ser­ F o od C o o p , " D i C a rlo said .

B racke tt s u g g e s te d th a t G ert's v ic e 's p ro fits o r losses d ire ctly.

S avoir Fare w ill b e free to "e m b ra ce the dum piness that is the cam ­ C a te rin g m a n a g e r Teresa C o rre ia d e v e lo p its m enu as it pleases. pus bar." s a id she ho pe s the o p e ra tio n w ill " N o o n e g u id e s us o n w h a t "The atm osphere a t G ert's is so b re a k even "as o f next w e e k ." w e should sell a n d h o w w e should neutral, y our night de p e n d s on y o u ," he W h ile the c a te rin g services should said . "You c a n 't have a b a d night o r a s e ll," s a id Di C a rlo , "a s id e from ha ve no p ro b le m turning g o o d night because o f G e rt's." ■ g o ve rn m e n t re g u la tio n s ." ■ — W ith files from Laura S a b a

Pita Pit no more

S S M

U

the m cgill tribune | 14.9.04 | news

B R I E F S

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In form ation , please The Students' S o c ie ty has set up a n in fo rm a tio n kiosk in the lo b b y o f the S hatner U niversity C en tre. Form er S S M U P resid ent A la m A lii c a m ­ p a ig n e d on the id e a as a w a y to he lp students n a v ig a te b u re a u c ra cy a t S S M U , university a n d c ity levels.

D espite its close p ro xim ity to the S S M U o ffic e itself, S S M U representa­ tives a re c o n fid e n t th at the kiosk is a po sitive a d d itio n to the S hatner b u ild ­ in g.

"The kiosk is a n extension o f th e S S M U o ffic e ," s a id A n th o n y Di C a rlo , S S M U vice -p re sid e n t o p e ra ­ tions, "a n d it com es a t n o cost.

Instead o f h a vin g tw o p e o p le a t the fro n t desk, w e put o n e a t the kiosk."

A s ing le S S M U re ce p tio n ist sits a t the silver desk a n d an sw e rs ques­ tions from passing students. It is in ten de d to m a ke S S M U in form ation

a n d c lea nly."

Security o ffic ia ls a re re v ie w in g s urve illan ce c a m e ra fo o ta g e .

—Jennifer Jett

T u rno ver in clubs and services portfolio N a fa y C h o u d h u ry a n d A le x K em eny w e re ele c te d clubs represen­ tatives to the Students' S o c ie ty coun­ c il S unday, fillin g tw o seats left v a c a n t fo llo w in g re sig n a tio n s last w eek.

C lu b s a n d S ervices representa­ tives G o s ia R ad aczynska a n d Safi G e rc h a k resig ned fo r pe rso na l rea­ sons. " M y re s ig n a tio n ... [h a d ] noth­ in g w h a tso e v e r to d o w ith [ViceP resid ent C lu b s a n d S e rv ic e s ] Sam een [S h a h id ] o r a n y other m em ­ b e r o f th e S S M U e x e c ,” s a id R ad aczynska. "I w a s rea lly, lo o k in g

WE’RE LOOKING FOR P A S S IO N A T E P E O P L E

"W h y do I n ever m a k e it to m y 8 :3 0 a m class?"

ea sier fo r students to o b ta in a n d to cut d o w n on c o n g e s tio n in the S S M U o ffic e . " A lo t o f p e o p le a re lost. They ask m e w h e re the cash m a ch in e is o r th ey d o n 't k n o w h o w to fin d the S S M U o ffic e ," s a id A m in a Doherty, U 2 P olitical S cie n ce a n d W o m e n 's Studies, w h o staffs th e in form ation kiosk. "The best question so fa r has be en , 'W h e re is Shatner.?'"

— Elisha S ie g e l

G ert's gets jacked T w o turntables a n d a m ixer have be en stolen from the d e e ja y bo oth in side G ert's Pub. A d e e ja y n o tic e d the theft w he n he a rriv e d fo r the b a r's w e e k ly "Thursday N ig h t T ra d itio n ."

Students' S ocie ty Vice-President O p e ra tio n s A n th o n y Di C a rlo m an­ a g e d to b o rro w re p la c e m e n t e q u ip ­ m ent from a frie n d fo r fre e. The rent­ e d m ixer w a s fully insured, a n d Di C a rlo is filin g insurance c laim s fo r the S S M U -o w n e d turntables a n d nee­ dles.

"To th e best o f m y k n o w le d g e , w e 're not lia b le fo r a n yth in g right no w , but y o u never k n o w w h a t h a p ­ pe ns," he s a id .

S in ce the b o rro w e d e q u ip m e n t m a y n o t b e a v a ila b le long-term , S S M U m a y ha ve to rent o r b u y n e w e q u ip m e n t w h ile w a itin g fo r the insur­ a n c e claim s to b e pro ce ssed .

Di C a rlo s a id the e q u ip m e n t p ro b a b ly d is a p p e a re d o v e r the w eekend.

"From w h a t w e k now , there w a s n o d a m a g e . These p e o p le knew the b u ild in g a n d the a re a . It w a s p la n n e d a n d execute d v e ry neatly

fo rw a rd to w o rk in g w ith them on c o u n c il."

Leon M w o tia , w h o continues to h o ld the third clubs representative seat, s a id th at the resig nation s a n d b y e le c tio n w ill no t ha ve a n e g a tiv e effe ct o n student gro up s. " A lot o f the gru nt w o rk [w a s d o n e ] o ver the sum m er," he s a id . "I e n jo y e d an e xce llent w o rk in g rela­ tio n s h ip w ith G o s ia a n d Safi a n d feel c o n fid e n t th a t I w ill b e a b le to a c h ie v e the g o a ls th at w e set fo r our­ selves, e s p e c ia lly w ith the s u p p o rt o f the n e w c lu b representatives."

M w o tia 's p rio ritie s a re to fo rm a c lu b caucus th a t w ill ho ld representa­ tives a c c o u n ta b le , to assess h o w c lu b s o b ta in fu ll status, a n d to research m eans b y w h ic h clubs can b e co m e m ore self-sufficient. M w o tia s a id th a t n e w revenue stream s, such as a sponsorship p ro g ra m th at is in the w orks, a re m eant to supplem ent S S M U fu n d in g rather than re p la c e it.

"T he se w e re o u r p rio ritie s be ca u se th ey p ro ve d to b e sticking issues in previous y e a rs ," he s a id , "a n d the e xit re p o rt o f the previous c lu b representatives strong ly suggest­ e d w e d e a l w ith those issues as soon as p o ss ib le ."

— D a v id M . N a ta f

C O R R E C T IO N i last w eek's An a rtic le issue in co rre ctly re p o rte d the a g e a n d m id d le in itia l o f Kathleen A n n e C urrier. C urrie r w a s 1 8 y ears o ld . The Tribune regrets the errors.

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Insüfcüde «coaches dmjues ite Mon&éS

www.ircm.qc.ca/en/ admission@ircm.qc.ca (514) 987-5527

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news | 14.9.04 | the m cgill tribune

C A M P U S

C A M P U S

N E W S

Green and healthy

NEW S

Chartwells better equipped to m anage café, says McGill

New bike-share program in the works Continued from cover LAURA SABA The Students' S o c ie ty a n d the M c G ill Environm ental O ffic e a re c o l­ la b o ra tin g on a p la n to p ro v id e a bikeshare system on the d o w n to w n c a m ­ pus.

O n c e b ic y c le stations a re set up a t various lo ca tio ns on cam p us, stu­ dents a n d staff w ill b e a b le to sign a b ic y c le out fo r a ce rta in p e rio d o f tim e so th at they c a n g e t a ro u n d in a n ea sy a n d en vironm en tally-frien dly w a y.

V o y a g e z Futé, a n o t-fo r-p ro fit o rg a n iz a tio n th at pro m o tes g re e n e r tra nsp ort alternatives, w ill p ro v id e the

a ce rta in [d e a d lin e ]."

Friedlaender, w h o c a m p a ig n e d o n the issue last sprin g, hopes to even­ tu a lly e x p a n d the n e tw o rk to in clude lo ca tio n s such S olin H a ll, a student res­ id e n ce n e ar the Lionel-G roulx m etro stop.

"W h e n w e start, w e 'll o n ly have fiv e bikes, but w e 're try in g to g e t to a b o u t 1 0 o r 1 5 o f th em ," he s a id .

H e w o u ld a lso like the system to g ro w to the p o in t th a t a b ic y c le ca n be left a t a n y station as o p p o s e d to exclu­ sive ly the o n e it o rig in a te d from .

F rie d la e n d e r and SSMU E n v iro n m e n ta l C o m m is s io n e r Kim

A d m in is tra tio n a n d F in a n ce M o rty Yalovsky a lso a n n o u n c e d plans to establish a D ining a t M c G ill A d v is o ry C om m ittee to lo ok into food-re lated issues on cam pus.

Students O pposed to the c o rp o ra ­ tiza tio n o f cam pus cafe teria s a re upset b y the c h a n g e in m a n a g e m e n t a t the M c G ill B ookstore café . C AFS m em ber C e lia Kutz said the c a fé c h a n g e d hands "covertly." " N o th in g the a d m in is tra tio n c la im e d has been u p h e ld ," she said . " W e understood that there w e re n 't sup­ posed to b e a n y chan ge s o f ow n e r­ ship fo r o n e year. There is still no com ­ mittee, a n d w e ha ve n't receive d a n y inform ation a b o u t the com m ittee that w a s supp osed to esta blish ed."

Bill P ageau, d ire c to r o f Food S ervices a t M c G ill, s a id m a na ge m en t o f the c a fé w a s h a n d e d to C h a rtw ells fo r p ra c tic a l reasons.

"The m ain focus o f the bookstore is selling books, no t fo o d ," he said .

"This is w h y the c a fé w a s transferred to Food S ervices— because w e a re m ore e x p e rie n ce d in ta kin g c a re o f fo o d ."

M e rse rea u a g re e d .

"Lots o f p e o p le are ta lking a b o u t the 'C h a rtw e lls ta ke o ve r,"' she said , "but it w a s n 't a takeover. M c G ill real­ iz e d it w a s n 't w e ll e q u ip p e d to over­ see fo o d services, so a jo in t d e c i­ s io n — a p a rtn e rs h ip — w a s re a c h e d w ith C h a rtw e lls."

W h ile other cafe teria s, such as th e fo rm e rly E n g in e e rin g

IW O N A LINK

Students claim th at C harw ells sells lo w er quality food a t h ig h er prices.

U n d e rg ra d u a te S ocie ty-ru n G o o d Bytes C a fé , have e x p e rie n ce d p rice increases since b e co m in g C h a rtw ells o p era tio ns, M e rse rea u said that prices w ill not c h a n g e a t the M c G ill B ookstore café . The fo o d menu m ight c h a n g e slightly, she said , but "every­ th ing should stay m ore o r less the sam e" a n d em ployees w ill not b e trans­ ferred to other C h a rtw e lls cafe teria s on cam pus.

The c a fé w ill continue to serve Starbucks coffee.

"A n y tim e a business changes

hands, p e o p le tend to g e t a little fre a ke d o u t," M e rse rea u said , "espe­ c ia lly w ith so m e th in g like c o ffe e , w h e re p e o p le o rd e r the sam e thing e v e ry d a y. But w e a re d o in g our best to m ake a sm ooth transition so w e d o n 't disrupt pe op le's d a ily routines."

But Kutz is c o n c e rn e d a b o u t m ore than fin d in g a g o o d c u p o f joe.

"C h a rtw e lls is not interested in cre a tin g a relationship w ith the com m u­ nity on c a m p u s ," she s a id . "It's interest­ e d in profits a n d cre a tin g a nam e a n d a p re s e n c e ."*

A N G L E S ’

IW O N A LINK

Stealing is w ro n g and hard w o rk , ta k e it easy and just b o rro w a bike. b icycles.

Initially, the p ro je c t w ill involve o n ly five b icycles a n d just o n e station, ou tside the S hatner U niversity C entre.

Students w ill ha ve to b rin g the b icycle s b a c k to the sam e lo ca tio n a fter th ey are through using them.

The system has be en in p la c e a t the M a c d o n a ld cam p us since last year.

D 'S o u z a a re currently lo o k in g fo r sp o n ­ sors in o rd e r to e x p a n d the system as q u ic k ly as possible.

F rie d la e n d e r s a id th a t the b icycle s "w ill not c a rry C o c a -C o la lo g o s o r anyth in g like that. I d o n 't w a n t students [u sin g the bicy cle s ] to b e m o ving a d s ."

Instead, he w o u ld like the s pon­ sors' advertisem ents to a p p e a r on the k e y c h a in s , b ic y c le locks a n d pe rh a p s the b ic y c le s ta lls th em ­ T h e b ic y c le s "will n o t c a r r y C o c a selves.

C o la lo g o s o r a n y th in g lik e th a t. I "A n y th in g th at gets y o u o u t o f cars a n d out d o n 't w a n t stu d e n ts [u s in g th e b ic y ­ o f buses is a g o o d c le s ] to b e m o v in g a d s ." th in g ," s a id M ic h e lle Lee, d ire c to r of — D aniel Friedlaender, G re e n in g M c G ill, w h o VP C om m unity a n d G overm ent ho pe s to c o lla b o ra te on the p ro je c t in the future.

"I think it w ill bene-, fit students in m a n y " W e o rig in a lly w a n te d to b rin g it w a y s ," s a id Friedlaender. "They w ill d o w n to w n as w e ll, bu t w e h a d tro uble g e t p la c e s quicker, it's healthy, a n d they fin d in g a host," s a id Kathleen N g , w o n 't ha ve to p a y fo r tra n sp o rt."

M c G ill en vironm en tal officer. "S S M U N e ith e r N g n o r F rie d la e n d e r has the s p a c e — [S h atn er] is a g o o d belie ve s there is m uch th reat o f the b ic y ­ p la c e fo r a b ike fleet a n d it is h a lfw a y cles b e in g stolen. b e tw e e n both [e n d s] o f the ca m p u s ."

"The bikes a t [M a c d o n a ld c a m ­ S S M U Vice-President C om m u nity pus] a re e a sily id e n tifia b le — b ig a n d a n d G o v e rn m e n t D an iel F rie dlaen de r u g ly," s a id N g . c o m p a re d the system to the w a y a She a d d e d that th ey a re sim ple cam p us lib ra ry w orks. three-speed b icycle s a n d p ro b a b ly not "W h e re v e r the stations a re , som e­ bikes th at p e o p le w o u ld w a n t to steal. o n e w ill b e there to scan y o u r ID c a rd , "T he y're not p re tty — that's p a rt o f o r in this case, w rite it d o w n until w e the p o in t," F rie d la e n d e r s a id . "A n d can be m o re te c h n o lo g ic a lly besides, y o u w o u ld ha ve to sign a a d v a n c e d . You w ill then b e g ive n a hel­ w a iv e r w h e n y o u sign o n e o u t." met a n d a key to a b ik e lock, a n d you The p ro g ra m is set to b e g in in the w ill ha ve to b rin g the b ike b a c k b e fore sprin g a n d w ill run year-ro und . ■

"A chicken in every pot and a Band-Aid on every skinned knee" REBECCA GRABER

O

tta w a — Federal o ffic ia ls have s la p p e d d o w n 'a n e w p ro v in c ia l request fo r health­ c a re cash th at w o u ld cost O tta w a $ 1 3-b il­ lio n a y e a r to shore up M e d ic a re . The request c a m e just tw o d a y s b e fo re prem iers m eet w ith Prime M in is te r Paul M a rtin in O tta w a to n e g o tia te w h a t M r. M a rtin has be en a d ve rtis in g as a h e a lth c a re fix fo r a g e n e ra tio n ." — G lo b e a n d M a il, Saturday, S ep tem be r 1 1.

M a y b e m y hopes w e re to o h ig h , but w h e n I arrive d in C a n a d a three years a g o , I e x p e cte d a bountiful la n d o f spit-shined c lin ics a n d sm iling d o c ­ tors. I ha ve be en m ild ly d is a p p o in te d .

The p ro b le m o f d istribu tion is the thorn in e very pro vince's side : stories o f C a n a d a s la u d e d health­ c a re system em e rg e as m ild ly in fla te d , alm o st myth­ ic a l tales o f w h a t m igh t ha ve be en , a n d w h a t still c o u ld be.

In response, M a rtin — w h o o n ly b e ca m e prim e m inister be ca u se en o u g h signs w e re po sted p ro ­ c la im in g th at Stephen H a rp e r eats b a b ie s to s w a y a s lig h t p o rtio n o f the e le c to ra te — has in tro d u ce d v a g u e p o lic y g o a ls in ten de d to fix the system. The m ost pro m in e n t o f these g o a ls is to red uce w a itin g times.

So M o n s ie u r M a rtin a n d the prem iers w ill b e m eeting to d e b a te , in classic C a n a d ia n fa sh ion , w h o w ill p a y fo r a ll these g ra n d id e a ls o f (ga sp l) a cce ssib le , p o rta b le , universal, c o m p reh ensive a n d p u b lic health care.

Last w e e k e n d , th e p ro v in c e s s u g g e s te d O tta w a p a y $ 1 2 .9 -b illio n pe r year, w ith a $ 4 -b illion im m e d ia te co n trib u tio n a n d a $ 7 . 6 -b illio n sub­ s id iz a tio n o f the p ro vin ce s' y e a rly p re scription drug bill, w ith the re m a in d e r g o in g as e q u a liz a tio n p a y ­ ments to w a rd s the, er, e c o n o m ic a lly s c ra w n y provinces.

This w a s c a te g o ric a lly rejected b y the g o ve rn ­ ment. The feds o ffe re d $ 9 -b illio n o v e r five years, w ith the p o ssib ility o f e q u a liz a tio n paym ents o r in cre ased fu n d in g if the e c o n o m y takes a h it— a real c o n c e rn , since a g ric u ltu re has taken a b e a tin g this year.

The provinces, m e a n w h ile , w o rry th at the feds w ill attach to o m a ny fu n d in g strings in the atte m p t to im p ro ve treatm ent tim e. A la s, m ine eyes fa il to see h o w a n em ph asis on re d u c in g the lengths o f w a its fo r surgery, s p e cia list visits, e tc., c o u ld b e a b a d thing.

But pro vinces a re m ost irked a t the fe d s' refusal to p ic k up the pre scription -dru g ta g . C a n a d a c o u ld red uce costs through bu lk p u rch asing , a n d a n a tio n ­ al p la n w o u ld e q u a liz e access a n d c o v e ra g e th roug ho ut the country.

This sounds d e ce n t to m e — the c h e a p e r y o u g e t y o u r Tylenol 3 from the do ctor, the b ig g e r the p ro fit w h e n y o u p a w n them o ff on y o u r c o d e in e curious friends, no?

Problem is, no thing w ill c h a n g e fo r the ne glect­ e d p a tie n t until both fe d e ra l a n d p ro v in c ia l p o liti­ c ia n s g e t their shit to g e th e r a n d m ake som e serious sacrifices.

A n d lest the p o litic ia n s fo rg e t, a d e a d vote r is o f no he lp to you.

Unless y o u 're in F lo rid a, o f course. ■

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• H ille l M o n tre a l's free a n n u a l S h a b b a t d in n e r d re w m ore than 4 0 0 students to the S hatner ba llro o m o n Friday. • A w {xixlifigt * c a t th at fell a s le e p in a W ashing m a ch in e in E ng la nd sur­ y tti v iv e d a 6 0 -m in u te c yc le a t 4 0 d e g re e s C elsius: H e e s ca p e d *\v% $ cv e& • w ith m ino r injuries a n d a fe w less o f his nine lives. • The iv o n t t .

C a n a d ia n Id o l season fin a le w ill a ir T hursday e v e n in g on CTV. The tw o finalists a re 2 3 -ye a r-o ld Theresa Sokyrka from S askatoon a n d 18-year-old K d la n Porter o f M e d ic in e H at, ette \ A lta . • O n S aturday, A m e rica n s m arked the third a n n ive rsa ry e \tiu fK v o f 9 / 1 1 b y h o ld in g m om ents o f silence a n d re a d in g a lo u d the; nam es o f lo ve d ones lost w h e n h ija c k e d pa sse n g e r plan es y cra sh e d in fo N e w York's W o rld Trade C enter, the Pentagon in W a s h in g to n , D .C ., a n d a f ie ld in Pennsylvania. « T h e a g e n c y 1 b * s< rn th at o w n e d the W T C is suing S au di A ra b ia , a lle g in g th at the i x k / ‘ w hu Saod'.s p ro v id e d . a l-Q a e d a w ith funds to c a rry o u t the ï t x i t i W w I, attacks. The c o m p a n y th at insured the W T C has in itia te d a w k n u t.. la w s u it o f its o w n — a g a in s t the airlin es, c itin g their ne gli­ g e n c e as a m a jo r fa c to r in th e successful execution o f the ‘Vhe mi pwi attacks. • A Tribune e d ito r w ill g iv e a c a n d y b a r to the m i MamxW" U first pe rso n w h o w a lk s info: the e d ito ria l o ffic e (robm 1 1 0 o f the S hatner U niversity C entre) w ith a c orrect­ K m ly co m p le te d c fb s sw o rd (see p a g e 1 0 ). • Fifty-nine: p c * I I*» turn g f * V p e r cent o f C a n a d ia n s b e lie ve th at the te levised i i * y ..t* iu s t * F e d e ra l-P ro v in c ia l H e a lth S um m it fro m s , w 4 s iL m * S ep tem be r 1 3 to 1 5 w ill not am o u n t to a • J id y u m t n y ffW l solution, a c c o rd in g to a p o ll co n d u c te d : : ■ > ■' ■■■ Ipsos-Reid. ■

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O B T A I N P E R M A N E N T R E S ID EN C Y 1 :

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- S tu d e n ts ' S o c ie ty Vice-President U niversity A ffa irs a n d a c tin g President A n d re w B ryan, a d d re ss in g c o u n cillo rs Thursday d u rin g a p re se nta tio n on the various S S M U com m ittees.

The h a n d b o o k in question w as c o n c e iv e d as a five -p a g e docum ent, b u t e x p a n d e d to 6 6 s in g le -s p a ce d pa ge s.

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O A A S A S w w w .ouac.on.ca/om sas/ Ontario Medical School Application Service September 15, 2004 Last day for registering for on-line applications October 1, 2004 Application deadline

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O LSAS w w w .ouac.on.ca/olsas/ Ontario Law School Application Service November 1. 2004 Application deadline— first-year May 2, 2005 Application deadline— upper years

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TEAS w w w .ouac.on.ca/teas/ Teacher Education Application Service December 1, 2004 Application deadline

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opinion

Bilingualism©—the new age-defying treatment

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LISE T R E U T L E R

W h e n the e a g le s a re silent, the pa rrots b e g in to ja bb er.

— W in s to n C h u rc h ill

he s a d p a ssin g o f 18 -ye a r-o ld M c G ill student K athleen A n n e C u rrie r last S a tu rd a y h a d a strong c a m p u s -w id e im p a c t o n students, fa cu l­ ty a n d staff. U nfo rtun ate ly, th e university a d m in is tra tio n d id n o t m a ke the situa tio n a n y e a sie r fo r us. By re le a sin g its statem ent re g a rd in g the d e a th — the ca u se o f w h ic h rem ains u n k n o w n — ne a r­ ly a w e e k afte r the fa ct, the m em bers o f M c G ill a d m in is tra tio n d ire c tly in vo lv e d w ith these c ircu m ­ stances a re m a kin g it h a rd e r fo r e v e ry o n e to ha ve c o m p le te c o n fid e n c e in them if som e thing like this ever h a p p e n s a g a in .

T h e s ta te m e n t, re le a s e d b y th e U n iv e rs ity Relations O ffic e through M c G ill's W e b site late W e d n e s d a y , re a d th a t p re lim in a ry a u to p s y results c o n firm e d ne ith er fo ul p la y n o r m e n in g itis w e re to b la m e . N o m a jo r ca m p u s p u b lic a tio n , in c lu d in g the Tribune, h a d this in fo rm a tio n w h e n th ey w e n t to press last w e e k . In fa ct, c o m m u n ic a tio n b e tw e e n a d m in is ­ tra tive s ta ff a n d the m e d ia w a s so p o o r th a t several

to re a liz e th e ir p o te n tia l a lie n a tio n . W ith red ta p e a n d b u re a u c ra tic d e la y s m oun tin g a t M c G ill, the sec­ o n d Students' S o c ie ty p re sid e n tia l re s ig n a tio n in a y e a r a n d the h a n d lin g o f M s . C urrie r's d e a th , m a n y students a re a lre a d y b e g in n in g th e ir ro a d to dissatis­ fa c tio n w ith th e university; a sentim ent th at should never b e e x p e rie n c e d , let a lo n e this ea rly, in a post­ s e c o n d a ry career.

The issue o f c o m m u n ic a tio n b re a k d o w n is not a n iso la te d o n e . A m e ric a n s w ill lo n g rem em be r the a m o u n t o f tim e it to o k President G e o rg e W . Bush to re sp o n d to the 9 / 1 1 attacks w h e n he first le a rn e d o f them , as w e ll as th e three d a y s it to o k him to arrive a t G ro u n d Z e ro . Form er US President Bill C lin to n , on th e o th e r h a n d , w a s w is e to ad d re ss his co u n try im m e d ia te ly a fte r h e a rin g o f sh o c kin g new s, m ost n o ta b ly in the afterm ath o f the C o lu m b in e H ig h S c h o o l shoo tin gs. T hough he a n d oth e r fro nt men often la ck d e ta ils , p e o p le lo o k to le ad ers to g iv e them s o m e w h a t o f a fe e lin g o f c o m fo rt in sensitive situa­ tions, a n d a b s e n c e o f d e ta il shou ld n o t b e used as a n excuse to re m ain silent. The W ith red ta p e a n d b u re a u c ra tic d e la y s m ount­ a d m in is tra tio n la c k e d s u fficie n t le a d e rsh ip ing a t M c G ill, the s e c o n d S tudents' S o c ie ty p resi­ here a n d if is n o w un de r fire to redeem itself. d e n tia l re s ig n a tio n in a y e a r a n d the h a n d lin g o f It is im p o rta n t to note th a t w e have M s . C u rrie rs d e a th , m a n y students a re a lre a d y seen num erous p o sitive e x a m p le s recen tly b e g in n in g th e ir ro a d to d is s a tis fa c tio n w ith the uni­ set b y the university. O n e o f P rin cipal versity; a sentim ent th a t s h o u ld n eve r b e e x p e ri­ H e a th e r M unroe-B lum 's first acts o n the jo b w a s her infam ous b le n d in g in w ith students e n c e d , let a lo n e this e arly, in a p o s t-s e c o n d a ry a t S no w A P . This is e s p e c ia lly iro n ic ca re e r. b e c a u s e o f he r e x p lic it e m p h a s is on research in lieu o f students, w h e re a s her pre d e ce ss o r w a s o p p o s ite in his th in k in g , in a c cu ra te d e ta ils w e re in c lu d e d in ne w s reports y e t w a s n o tic e a b ly a b se n t a ro u n d ca m p u s. She w a s a cross the country. The university shou ld h a ve d e s ig ­ a ls o a strong c o m fo rt fo r the fa m ily o f M s . C u rrie r n a te d a spokespe rson th a t w a s e a s ily a c c e s s ib le in -upon her d e a th , a lo n g w ith the D ea n o f Students, o rd e r to h a ve b e tte r p u b lic relations w ith the student B ruce S hore. H o w e v e r, it is still upsetting fo r m a ny b o d y . Instead, students liv in g in a n d a ro u n d D o u g la s p e o p le , in c lu d in g the parents o f o th e r students, w h o H a ll w e re a t a loss— not o n ly in a tte m p tin g to d e a l n o d o u b t b e c a m e w o rrie d them selves up o n h e a rin g w ith the tra g e d y , but a ls o in try in g to fig u re o u t w h a t the v a g u e reports, to w itness the d isre sp e ct a n d e x a c tly h a p p e n e d jy s t a fe w steps from th eir do rm un p ro fe ssio n a l w o rk d is p la y e d b y those in c h a rg e . room s.

W ith th e b e n e fit o f h in d sig h t, the a d m in is tra tio n must A s a result, the a d m in is tra tio n has d u g itself into c a re fu lly e x a m in e the events th at tra n sp ire d last w e e k ­ a n a lre a d y d e e p ho le w ith first-year students, w h o a re e n d , a n d ensure th a t its h a n d lin g o f s im ila r situations c o n ta in in g th e ir ra g e a n d co n fu sio n as th e y p re p a re d o e s not m irror the recen t e p is o d e . ■

o rg e t the fa c ia l cream s a n d B otox in jections; y o u w ill g e t lines a n d w rin kle s no m atter w h a t. Instead, focus o n a n e w a g e -d e fy ­ ing treatm ent that w ill ke e p y o u r m e m o ry in tact fo r years to co m e . A fte r a ll, w h a t use is a paper-sm ooth fa c e a t 7 5 if y o u c a n 't rem em ber yo u r frie n d s' nam es o r y o u r o w n address?

H ere in o u r b e lo ve d , b ilin g u a l M o n tre a l w e a re a t a n a d v a n ta ­ ge o u s p o sitio n to stay y o u n g . W ith both English a n d French a t the tips o f ou r tongues, w e c a n e a sily b e co m e b ilin g u a l— the ve ry d e fe n ce a g a in s t m e m o ry loss a n d a g in g m inds. The link b e tw e e n flu­ ent b ilin g u a lism a n d flu id in te llig e n c e — d e fin e d as the a b ility to rem ain fo cu sed on a task d e sp ite ou tside distra ctio n s — has be en o f g re a t interest to scientists in recent years. In W a le s , la n g u a g e m inis­ ter Alun Pugh is p ro m o tin g b ilin g u a l te a c h in g from birth as g iv in g ch il­ dre n a n e d u c a tio n a l a d v a n ta g e ; as th e y,re a ch a d u lth o o d , the a d v a n ­ ta g e continu es in their faster re a ctio n tim es a n d m inim al distra ction .

In C a n a d a , Dr. Ellen B ialystok o f York U niversity has co n d u c te d sev­ era l expe rim e nts in vo lving contro l gro u p s, m o n o lin g u a ls a n d b ilin ­ gu als. In e v e ry case, the b ilin g u a l g ro u p p e rfo rm e d the best.

But w h a t is the link? C o u ld w e not a rg u e that b ilin g u a ls perform better in the experim ents sim p ly be ca use they a re sm arter (hence their a b ility to retain tw o la ng uag es)? N o — there is a co n n e c tio n in the b ra in , a n d size d o e s n 't matter. A n y c h ild , if p ro p e rly e x p o se d a n d raised, c a n b e fluent in m ore than o n e la n g u a g e . N o a m C ho m sky th e o rize d th at a ll c h ildren a re bo rn w ith a n inherent "la n g u a g e a c q u i­ sition d e v ic e th a t e n a b le s them to e a sily a n d ra p id ly m aster a lan­ g u a g e until a g e seven, a t w h ic h p o in t the a b ility fo r la n g u a g e learning be g in s to d e clin e . His theories have be en pro ve n tim e a n d tim e a g a in .

As to w h y bilin g u a lism helps fig h t the m ind's a g in g process, the first th e o ry lies w ith in the b ra in . It m akes sense that the b ra in process­ es used to m a in ta in tw o s e p a ra te la n g u a g e s w o u ld a lso b e used in . m e m o riza tio n a n d con ce n tra tio n . Think o f it this w a y : w ritin g a p a p e r w h ile ig n o rin g y our ro o m m a te s d e a th m etal is qu ite sim ilar to a flu­ ently b ilin g u a l person s p e a kin g o n ly in o n e o f their la n g u a g e s an d no t letting the other slip in o r g e t confused. M a k e sense n o w ?

This is im p o rta n t to us as students, a n d it's im po rtan t n o w . W h ile a t university, take a d v a n ta g e o f the m a n y la n g u a g e courses o ffere d a n d pe rh a p s even b e co m e fluent in o n e . If y o u 're not a native M o n tre a le r, use your tim e here to pe rfect your English, French, or bo th. For C a n a d ia n s , there is a n even g re a te r incentive: q u ic k w it a n d m e m o ry in o ld a g e , but e x p a n d in g c a re e r o p p o rtu n itie s in the ne ar future w ith fluency in both o ffic ia l la n g u a g e s.

They tell you to p lan fo r y our retirem ent b y investing; p la n for your future in its entirety b y sa vin g y our b ra in a n d b e co m in g , o r stayin g, b ilin g u a l W e spend so m uch e n e rg y on A lzheim er's a n d d e m e n tia research, so w h y no t a lso take our o w n pre ve nta tive m eas­ ures? In the future, you w ill thank yourself fo r b e in g a b le to rem em ­ be r y our frie nd s' nam es — a n d for the la rg e am o u n t y o u w ill ha ve as a result o f y our intellect. ■

F

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I buy them for the articles, I swear o u s id le u p to the ca sh re g is te r w ith a sta c k o f m a g a ­ z in e s a n d p la c e them o n the coun ter, c h o re o g ra p h in g y o u r p u rch a s e s o as to m a ke sure y o u r c o p y o f this w e e k's Tim e m a g a z in e a n d th a t o f The N e w Yorker h id e the latest issue o f C o s m o p o lita n . You w a lk tw e n ty b lo c ks w e s t o f y o u r re g u la r n e w ss ta n d to b u y th e latest issue o f P la y b o y th a t y o u k n o w is g o in g to g o u n d e r y o u r b e d b e fo re a n y fe m a le

Y

W h a t yo u re a d says a b s o lu te ly n o th in g a b o u t yo u e x c e p t th a t yo u c a n re a d . N o b o d y is ju d g in g yo u.

N o t the cashier, n ot the o th e r p e o p le in the store, n ot the w o m a n w h o lives across the hall.

sh o u ld ve n tu re in to y o u r ro o m . N e w s w e e k , ho w e ve r, is a llo w e d to re m a in in full v ie w .

W e live in a tim e w h e re w o m e n a re s u p p o s e d to b e sex­ u a lly lib e ra te d a n d e v e ry te le v is io n s h o w w rite s in to the sto-

ry lin e th a t its a ll rig h t to le t guys b e g u ys . So w h y a re w e still h id in g w h a t w e re a d (or lo o k at)?

W e a ll like to th in k w e a re e d u c a te d a n d " a w a re " th a t w o m e n s m a g a z in e s p ro m o te a n u n h e a lth y b o d y im a g e , d is ­ c rim in a te a g a in s t w o m e n w h o d o n o t fit a c e rta in m o u ld a n d b e n e fit o n ly m a jo r c o rp o ra tio n s (as d o m en's, fo r th a t m atter).

W e a ll lo o k a t th e m a g a z in e s , sh a k e o u r h e a d s in d isg u s t a n d in d ig n a n tly tell o u r frie n d s th a t th e y a re d e g ra d in g to w o m e n . Yet s oon as w e a re a lo n e w e q u ic k ly lo o k a ro u n d to see if a n y o n e w e k n o w is a ro u n d a n d then b u y the v e ry sa m e m a g a z in e s .

W o m e n d o n o t w a n t to b e c a u g h t b u y in g these "o ffe n ­ s iv e " w o m e n 's m a g a z in e s , m en d o n o t w a n t to b e c a u g h t p ic k in g u p s p e c ific m en's m a g a z in e s , y e t n o b o d y p ro u d ly d is p la y s the n e w s m a g a z in e s o r lite ra ry re v ie w s th e y buy.

W e seem to ta k e fo r g ra n te d th a t it's a ll rig h t b u t n o t s p e c ia l to b u y e d u c a tio n a l a n d in te lle c tu a l m a g a z in e s bu t still w o rry a b o u t w h a t re a d in g C o s m o o r P la y b o y says a b o u t us.

W h a t e x a c tly d o e s w h a t y o u re a d s a y a b o u t y o u ?

I II b e the first to a d m it to b u y in g hu n d re d s o f fa s h io n m a g a z in e s a n d o n ly o n e issue o f The S c ie n tific A m e ric a n in m y life tim e . The la tte r c a tc h e s the e y e b e c a u s e o f a c o v e r

LA U R A SABA

story, w h e re a s the fa s h io n m a g a z in e s fe n d to b e p u rc h a s e d w ith o u t so m uch as a g la n c e a t w h a t is o n th e cove r. W e d o n 't re a lly c a re w h a t is in the a rtic le s . W e b u y them to lo o k a t th e pictu re s o f e x p e n s iv e dresses o n a irb ru s h e d c e le b ritie s w ith p e rfe c t fig u re s a n d w is h w e w e re o n e o f th em , a ll the w h ile p re te n d in g w e d o n 't.

W e a ls o b u y n e w s m a g a z in e s o r lite ra ry jo u rn a ls y e t d o n o t fe e l the n e e d to d is p la y these p u b lic a tio n s to a n y o n e .

The o n ly ju d g e m e n t y o u 'll g e t fo r b u y in g a n y o f the a b o v e is a n e m p ty b a n k a c c o u n t m o c k in g y o u fro m th e A T M s cre e n . W h a t y o u re a d says a b s o lu te ly n o th in g a b o u t y o u e x c e p t th a t y o u c a n re a d . N o b o d y is ju d g in g y o u . N o t the cash ie r, n o t th e o th e r p e o p le in the store, n o t the w o m a n w h o lives a c ro s s the h a ll.

W e c a n a ll b e n e fit fro m a q u ic k re a lity c h e c k , a n d s to p h id in g o u r s u b s crip tio n s to P la y b o y (e x c e p t m a y b e fro m M o m ). Y our frie n d s w o n 't th in k less o f y o u w h e n th e y see the la test InS tyle o r M a x im sittin g o n y o u r c o ffe e ta b le . But h a ve y o u n o tic e d h o w a n y o n e o f them has y e t to b o rro w a tra sh y m a g a z in e , w h ile y o u r c o p ie s o f The E cono m ist, N a tio n a l G e o g ra p h ic a n d P h o to g ra p h ic te n d to d is a p p e a r b e fo re y o u finish re a d in g them ? ■

The

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IVIcGill Tribune Curiosity delivers.

E d ito r - in - C hief Natalie Fletcher editor@tribune.mcgill.ca M

a n a g in g

the m cgill tribune j 14.9.04 | opinion

Deconstructing the facade

. . .

E dito r s

Katherine Fusler James Scarfone seniored@tribune.mcgill.ca N ew s E ditor s Jennifer Jett Laura Saba Lisa Varano tribnews@tribune.mcgill.ca F eatures E ditor s Liz Allemang Brody Brown features@tribune.mcgill.ca A&E E ditors Daniel Chodos Lise Treutler

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The positive feed back loop o f negativity B R E TT S C H R E W E

b re tt.s c h re w e @ m a il. m cgill. c a t o n e p o in t d u rin g C ity o f C o d , Rocket m akes th e astute o b se rva tio n th a t in the o n g o in g w a r b e tw e e n the forces o f drug k in g p in L'il Z é a n d m o ral c ru sa de r K nockout N e d , fe w , if any, o f the co m b a ta n ts rem em ber fo r w h a t reasons tn ey b e g a n fig h tin g in the first p la c e .

W h a t o rig in a lly b e g in s as a classic e n g a g e m e n t b e tw e e n g o o d a n d evil q u ic k ly de ge n e ra te s into a m aelstrom o f re ve n g e killing s, as e a ch side responds to personal Toss b y e x a c tin g the sam e o r w o rs e up on their adve rsa ries. The d u b io u s le g a c y re m ainin g is the p e rce p tio n o f a pe rm a nen t state o f w a r as n o thing o u t o f the o rd in a ry.

Peering into the not-so-distant reality, d e fe n ce contractors a re n o w c ritic a l to the s ta b ility o f the econ om y. Sales a re drive n b y tw o m a jo r fa cto rs — the c o n tin u e d use o f th eir d e a th -p ro d u c in g p ro d ­ ucts a n d the sustained fe a r o f never h a ving en o u g h to ensure c o m p le te security. D evastated b y the 9 / 1 1 attacks, the A m e ric a n go ve rn m e n t has g o n e o n a three-year w o rld tour o f its latest p ro d u c ­ tio n — re g im e c h a n g e , s ta rrin g the h e re to fo re unknow n pre-em ptive strike a n d p la y in g in various g lo b a l theatres. D espite b e in g o v e rw h e lm in g ly p a n n e d b y a la rg e m a jo rity o f critics, it has d o n e w o n d e rs a t the m ilitary-industrial b o x o ffic e , raking in US $ 4 0 0 b illio n fo r the D ep artm ent o f D efence from a 2 0 0 4 b u d g e t a c h ie v in g re cord deficits. Its

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im pressions g u a ra n te e sequel after sequel, as those w h o ha ve lost their e v e ry d a y lives in the process fo llo w the e x a m p le o f their to rm en tor a n d atte m p t to e x orcise their p a in b y visitin g it upon s om e on e else, just as the A m e rica n s b e fo re them .

H o w e ve r, th e s o la c e g a in e d is a k in to — as B erkeley p o e t June Ja co b s so w e ll put it— "a hit o f c ra c k ." W h ile there is a rush o f satisfaction e ve ry tim e A m e ric a n plan es b o m b the T a lib an, o r troops d ra g S a d d a m Hussein ou t o f the Iraqi la n d sc a p e , th e effects a re transient a n d w e a r o ff o n c e the new s be co m e s o ld . Further, p a in is not a n q lo g o u s to e m o tio n a l hot p o ta to ; it c a n n o t b e rem oved sim ­ p ly b y pa ssin g it o n to another, c o n tra ry to p o p u ­ lar w a rtim e a ctio n s a n d m id d le school b u lly in g .

Rather, it infects e v e rything it touches, w ith de va s­ ta tin g ra m ifica tio n s fo r e v e rything a n d everyon e, from the ra b b it w h o fin a lly d e c id e s to v io le n tly p ro ­ te ct his rig ht to a b o w l o f Trix, to the nation-state th at d e c id e s th at it is tire d o f hosting battles b e tw e e n w o rld p o w e rs a n d a c q u ire s nu clear w eapons.

B re a kin g a n y c yc le in to day's w o rld go es a g a in s t the m ainstream values w e ha ve c o m e to a c c e p t. Fearing th at it w o u ld b e p e rce iv e d as w e a k , A m e ric a has re sp o n d e d w ith a n over­ w h e lm in g s h o w o f m ilita ry fo rc e rather than under­ ta kin g a c ritic a l e xa m in a tio n o f th e factors c re a te d

b y e a rlie r sins it has com m itted. As o p p o s e d to a d m ittin g that it u n w ittin g ly a id e d the resurgence o f m ilitant Islam ic funda m e nta lism b y s u p p ly in g the m u ja h e e d in in 1 9 8 0 s A fg h a n is ta n w ith m ilita ry h a rd w q re — in e ffe c t using them as p a w n s in the C o ld W a r chess g a m e w ith the S ovie ts— it has chosen to con tin u e w ith a m indless w a y o f the s w o rd .

A s it stands, the s ta b ility o f the e c o n o m ic sys­ tem d e p e n d s a g re a t d e a l o n the arm s tra d e a n d conflict-driven g e o p o litic a l c lim a te . For the small p ric e o f o n e ro c ke t-pro pe lle d g re n a d e , o n e can b rin g d o w n a h e lic o p te r o f the m ilita ry that de stro ye d his brother's ho m e thanks to "co lla te ra l d a m a g e " a n d fe el so m e w h a t satisfied. For the p ric e o f an M l A b ra m s tank, o n e c a n flatten the n e ig h b o u rh o o d o f a m ilitant w h o shot d o w n a hel­ ic o p te r a n d a v e n g e those soldiers. C re a te d in the process is a destructive po sitive fe e d b a c k lo o p , g e n e ra tin g a n ete rn a lly unsaturated m arket ea sily e x p lo ite d b y a n e c o n o m ic sector e a g e r to ta p into it, regardless o f the fa c t th a t this m arket d e p e n d s on .hum an destruction a n d the p ro p a g a tio n o f a culture o f fear. U nche cked, this m adness o f a n eye fo r an e y e w ill in d e e d le ave the w h o le w o rld b lin d ; even n o w , as in the turf w a r in a B razilian slum, the reasons the fig h tin g b e g a n in the first p la c e a re b e c o m in g a d im m em ory. ■

arts@tribune.mcgill.ca

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Radically respectable S ports E ditors M o h it Arora

Puritan investors m ake for harmful oxymorons

A n d re w Segal sports@tribune.mcgill.ca

K IM D 'S O U Z A k im .d s o u z a @ m a il.m c g ill.c a

P h o t o E ditor s Yasemin Emory

C o p y E dito r Sam Goffman sam.goffman@mail.mcgill.ca D es ig n E d ito r Lara Bekhazi Benji Feldman Heather Kitty Mak design@tribune.mcgill.ca O

'm not sure w h a t I w a s e x p e c tin g to fin d w h e n I started lo o k in g in to sùstain ab le a n d e th ic a lly respo nsible investing. Still, I w a s surprised to dis­ c o ve r the m ost com m on tra it a m o n g the investing o p tio n s I e n co un tere d is their exclusion o f c o m p a ­ nies th at d e riv e revenue from to b a c c o , a lc o h o l o r g a m b lin g .

I'll a d m it I spent a la rg e p a rt o f m y c h ild h o o d pestering m y fa the r to q u it sm okin g, bu t even to my e n d u rin g n ic o tin e -N a z i m in d , sm okin g, d rin k in g a n d g a m b lin g d o no t seem qu ite the m ost urgent p ro ble m s fo r the e th ica l investor to c o m b a t. N o t in a w o rld w h e re evils like sw e atsho ps a n d c h ild la b o u r still exist. S h o u ld n 't w e m a ke m ore o f an e ffo rt to tra ce the links o f ou r investments to the w o rk in g c o n d itio n s o f th eir supp lie rs' em p lo y e e s in the d e v e lo p in g w o rld ? W h a t a b o u t the environ­ m ental d a m a g e p e rp e tu a te d b y their subsidiaries, not to m ention the in d ig e n o u s p e o p le d e p riv e d o f th eir natural in he ritan ce ? A t first g la n c e , current efforts to w a rd s respo nsible investing c a ll to m ind p u rita n s , w h o m G .K . C h e s te rto n re p u te d ly re p ro a c h e d fo r "p o u rfin g ] righteous in d ig n a tio n in to the w ro n g th ing s."

A t the sam e tim e, how ever, I think theres m o re to th e scree ning o u t o f the to b a c c o a n d sim­ ila r industries than th e m ere m isp la c e d activism o f

I

Iwona Link photo@tribune.mcgill.ca

E dito r Lynne Hsu online@tribune.mcgill.ca n l in e

A d v e r tis in g M a n a g e r Paul Slachta advmgr@ssmu.mcgill.ca A d T ypesetter Shawn Lazare P u b lish er Chad Ronalds

C o l la b o r a t o r s Christine Cullen, Kim D'Souza, José-Pierre Fernandez, Paul Goertzen, James Gotowiec, Rebecca Graber, Emily Harris, Gracia Jalea, Jonathan Klein, Heather Haq Lawrence, Cristina Markham, Dan M cQ uillan, David M .

Nataf, Julie Peters, Melissa Price, Casey Reynolds, Scott Sameroff, Brett Schrewe, Elisha Siesel, Josh W ilner

th e P rohibitions' spiritua l heirs. Just as the a n ti­ sm okin g m ovem ent has a p ro u d h isto ry o f k e e p in g kids from sm oking a n d sham in g the cro oks w h o m a ke m illions o ff o f lung cancer, so to o a re there n o b le r m otives b e h in d m ovem ents to c u rb a lc o h o l a n d g a m b lin g . W h a t's h o rrib le is w h e n extremists c o m e to d o m in a te the m ovem ent. Such puritans, u n a b le to b e a r w h a t A m e ric a n satirist A m b ro se B ie rce c a lle d the "h a u n tin g fe e lin g th at som eone, so m e w h e re , m igh t b e h a p p y ," atte m p t to en fo rce a p a rtic u la r lifestyle o n other p e o p le . A ll to o often th ey harness th e m om entum o f th eir m ovem ent's no b le r insp iration s to en fo rce p a te rn a listic la w s.

W h ile there's a d iffe re n c e b e tw e e n the kind o f d e cisio n s th a t in fo rm e d , health-conscious adults should m ake a n d the kind o f things th at w e should b a n b y la w , the s c a le a t w h ic h the purveyors o f these vices e x p lo it th eir custom ers suggests th at p e rh a p s righteous in d ig n a tio n is w a rra n te d after a ll. A s a frie n d p o in te d o u t to m e, the w o rld w e live in to d a y seem s eons a p a rt from the d a ys w h e n the a v e ra g e p u b k eep er m a d e his livin g selling stuff he b re w e d in his basem ent w h ile e v e ry b o d y sat a ro u n d a n d h a d a g o o d tim e. N o w a d a y s the o w n e rs o f the la rg e c o rp o ra tio n s atte m p tin g to b ra in w a s h us in to b u yin g their p ro d u c t— o r in the ca se o f g a m b lin g , co m p u lsive ly w a g e rin g cash in g a m e s o f c h a n c e — c o u ld n 't c a re less a b o u t h o w

g o o d a tim e w e have as lo n g as it d o e s n 't n e g a ­ tively a ffe c t h o w m uch o f their m e rch an dise w e buy. For th e m ost pa rt, such c o rp o ra tio n s a re much further rem oved fro m the consum er a n d much m ore ruthless.

Perhaps, ultim ately, th e p ro b le m is precisely h o w fa r rem oved w e a re from w h a t w e consum e.

I d o n 't necessarily w a n t to trash g lo b a liz a tio n , but it's c le a r th a t a m a jo r m a la ise o f industrial a n d ost-industrial societies is th at so little o f w h a t w e uy is p ro d u c e d lo c a lly a n d so little o f w h a t w e p ro d u ce is consum ed lo ca lly. If w e consum ed a n d invested lo c a lly w ith the intention o f h e lp in g the lo c a l e c o n o m ic a n d e c o lo g ic a l com m unity, w e p ro b a b ly w o u ld n 't ha ve to ju m p through bureau­ c ra tic ho o p s o f fire to fin d o u t n o w o u r m o ne y is im p a ctin g p e o p le a n d the environm ent.

A n a se e in g as m ost students p ro b a b ly d o n 't ha ve m o ne y to invest fa r a w a y a n y w a y , this sort o f b io re g io n a lis m offers a m uch m ore p ra c tic a l ref­ e re nce as w e strive to m ake w is e r ch o ice s a b o u t both ou r o w n health a n d o u r consum ption selec­ tio n . W e c a n m a ke sure th at puritanism do e s n 't g e t the last w o rd . W e c a n go ve rn ou r o w n habits a n d b e truly sustain ab le a n a s o c ia lly responsible.

A fte r a ll, w o u ld n 't m ost rather d rin k a Fin du M o n d e o r B la nche d e C h a m b ly o v e r som e be er behem oth's s u b p a r b re w ? I k n o w I w o u ld . ■

Letters taste like chocolate. W e like chocolate. Send us letters. Now. oped@tribune.mcgill.ca

^ c kpateh box

Pontifications and the preeminent punctuation mark

learning? To k n o w som ething w e must first know five it. N o w is the tim e to p la y the skeptic.

Forget a b o u t w h a t everyone thinks. W h a t that w e d o n 't k n o w it. It is b y a n d in a n d through d o you think? W e a r w h a t you w a n t, say w h a t this rea lization that w e arrive a t a n a n s w e r— or, h, the traum a of Septem ber. I'll du ck the you w a n t, b e w h a t you w a n t. There is no such better yet, m ore questions.

How-was^our-summer-good-how-wasQ uestions a re lo a d e d w ith inform ation. th ing as a poseur, o n ly som eone la ckin g the con­ o _ yours? script. H ere is the point: It's' a fid e n ce to com m it to himself. Assert yourself, but They a re an a c kn o w le d g e m e n t of a la ck o f infor­ m ation that is itself inform ative. A sking a question n e w year. D on't trip out o f the gates O n e Perdita thoughtfully so.

Felicien is en ou gh. Ensure that M c G ill is not an Be difficult. C a ll a sp a d e a d ia m o n d . N e ve r guides us to w a rd s an answer. But answ ers aren't assume. A lw a ys inquire. Speculate. Interpret. In a lw a ys param ount. D ogm atism represents a con­ a c a d e m ic factory.

W h a t do es this m ean? The la ck o f a direct y our o w n w a y . It is y our jo b to question. It is your viction that no questions need to b e a s k e d — that exp la n a tio n from Franz Ferdinand notw ithstand­ jo b to know , in true Socratic fashion, that you the answ er is there, iro nclad .

B ew a re o f stubborn certainties. Let the ques­ in g, it means this: d o n 't let things run to o sm ooth­ k n o w ve ry little.

N o t k n o w in g is the first step to w a rd s know ­ tion m ark reign suprem e. ■ ly a ro un d here. A v o id asse m b lylin e thinking.

Josh W iln e r is a U 3 P h ilo so p h y student.

N e v e r assume; a lw a y s question. D on 't take for in g. If w e d id n 't first k n o w that w e d id n 't know , g ra nte d. W e ha ve the rest o f our lives to nine-to- h o w w o u ld w e ever g o a b o u t getting to k n o w -

JOSH W ILNER

T r ib u n e O ffices Editorial. Shatner University Centre, Suite 110, 3 4 8 0 McTavish, Montreal Q C Tel: 514.398.6789 Fax. 514.398.1750

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^ i ^ j L T jb

b j T e T r ib ^ n e ^ u b f e a t ^ reserves\he riqht to ed it all c o n tritio n s . Editorials are d e cided upon an d written by the editorial board.

10 opinion | 14.9.04 | the m cgill tribune The Dose

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G hetto rap session: you g o tta live and let live Preaching for my Parrish JOSÉ-PIERRE FERNANDEZ

ost o f us a re a w a re b y n o w o f C a ro ly n Parrish's . c h o ic e o f w o rd s in d e s c rib in g A m e rican s in reg ard s to the issue o f m issile de fe n ce .

In d e e d , the attention g ive n to her fo r the sound-off o v e rs h a d o w s w h a t kind o f per­ son she truly is. In F e brua ry 1 9 9 4 , M s .

Parrish w a s o n e o f the fe w M Ps to sign a pe tition asking the fe d e ra l g o ve rn m e n t to p ro v id e la n d fo r a m e m o rial ho n o u rin g the 3 0 ,0 0 0 - 4 0 , 0 0 0 C a n a d ia n s w h o served fo r the US m ilita ry in V ietnam . She d id this d e sp ite there b e in g v e ry little p o litic a l c a p ­ ital to b e g a in e d .

M

Like M s . Parrish, I to o a m ,s k e p tic a l a b o u t the v ia b ility o f the p ro p o s e d m issile d e fe n ce p ro g ra m . Furtherm ore, a lo n g w ith fo rm e r US S ecretary o f the N a v y Jam es W e b b , US A ir Force Lieutenant-C olonel K aren K w ia tk o w s k i, G e o rg ia N a tio n a l G u a rd B rig a d ie r-G e n e ra l Jam es J. D a v id a n d V ietnam veteran S en ato r C h u ck H a g e l (R -Nebraska), I ha ve do ub ts a b o u t the necessity o f the Iraq w ar. I d o w ish the Toronto-area M P w o u ld ha ve chosen other w o rd s to express her sentim ents, but it w o u ld b e d ish o n o u ra b le to b ra n d her crass w a y s w h e n she has stuck o u t her ne ck for ou r V ietnam veterans.

S im ila rly , R e p re se n ta tiv e C y n th ia M c K in n e y (D -G e o rg ia ) w a s w id e ly d e n o u n c e d fo r refusing to sign a c o n g re s ­ sion al resolution a u th o riz in g the /President to ta ke w h a te v e r a ctio n s d e e m e d neces­ sa ry to respo nd to the 9 / 1 1 attacks. This is also unfair. M s . M c K in n e y s a c rific e d her seat b y -v ig o u ro u s ly seekin g justice fo r the 3 3 US servicem en, k ille d w h e n the; Israeli n a vy a n d a ir fo rc e b o m b e d the USSl Liberty w ith o u t p ro v o c a tio n on June 8 , 1 9 6 7 .

W h e n p e o p le in the p u b lic eye are v ilifie d , w e must rem em ber there is m ore to them than the vilifiers a re te lling us.

José-Pierre F e rn a n d e z is a U 3 H is to ry student

W

E L IS H A S IE G E L

o rd , this is y o u r b o y M a d C a p tio n s , a n d I've be en h e a rin g from m y p e o ­ p le in the G h e tto th a t there's c ra z y ten­ sions b e tw e e n roo m m ate s. C h e c k it, it d o e s n 't h a ve to b e like this. For real, B. N o m ore

Fill the B rita. Fill the B rita. Fill the B rita. Fill the B rita. Fill the Brita.

4 . "A n d I like y o u r bra ssie re a n d there's a p a rty in here. A n d I'm re a d y to ta lk n a u g h ty in

V ero nica's e a r " — O b ie Trice. If y o u r room m ate's d ra m a . I g o t the hook-up fo r a ll m y hom ies w h o g e ttin g som e, d o n 't g o a skin g her w h e re she left tr ip p in ', fo r riz z le . It's "T he G h e tto Ten the m o p-b ucket. D istract y ourself until m o rning C o m m a n d m e n tiz z le s ." R ecog nize. co m e s a ro u n d w h e n y o u c a n w itn ess the w a lk o f 1.

"W a tc h o u t fo r the m e d a llio n m y d sham ia ­ e a n d g e t a ll the d e ta ils. m onds a re w reckle ss. Feels like a m id g e t is 5 . "It a in 't no fun, if the hom ies c a n 't have h a n g in g from m y n e c k la c e "— Ludacris. D o n 't g o n o n e " — S n o o p D o g g . C o o k ie s , w e e d , cra ckers, p ic k in g a ro o m m ie just 'c a u s e he's b a llin g in the fe m in in e pro du cts, c o n d o m s, a n d p o rn a ll fa ll c lu b a n d flosses a d ia m o n d encrusted C a rtie r u n d e r the c a te g o ry o f co m m u n a l items. D o n 't w a tc h . M a k e sure yo u g o t som e s h iz zle in cornb o g a rt th at spliff. m izzle .

6 . "You s a y y o u g o tta m an a n d y o u 're in 2 . "I w a n n a act. b a lle rific like it's a ll te rrific. lo ve . But w h a t's lo ve g o tta d o w ith a little I g o t a c o u p le pa st d u e bills, I w o n 't g e t s p e c if­ m e n a g e ? "— Fat Joe. D o n o t un de r a n y circu m ­ ic " — K an ye W e s t. D o n 't b e a c h e a p b a sta rd . I stances s lee p w ith y o u r room m ate's s ig n ific a n t k n o w y o u 're jo n e sin g fo r th at fresh p a ir o f J orda n other. D o I re a lly ne e d to e x p la in this?

XIXs a t Foot Locker, but y o u g o tta p a y rent b e fo re 7 . "D a n c e , g o rush the s p e a k e r th at y o u b lo w a ll y o u r p a p e r on the hottest gear. bo om s. I'm k illin g y o u r b ra in like a p o isono us 3.

"S he b e a t m e o v e r the h e a d w ith the m u sh ro o m "— V an illa Ice. D o n 't listen to V an illa rem ote co n tro l o p e n e d a ho le , a n d m y w h o le Ice. It'll rot y o u r b ra in . b ra in fell o u t o f m y s k u ll"— Em inem . Fill th e Brita.

8 . " O k a y !!!" — Lil' Jon. So m a y b e your

ro o m m a te leaves c ig a re tte butts in the h a n g in g plan ts o r a lw a y s sm ells like c a n n e d co rn .

Som etim es y o u ha ve to just let things s lid e , p u t in y o u r g o ld fronts a n d say, " O k a y !!!"

9 . " W h y d id o n e s tra w b re a k the cam el's b a c k ? H ere's the secret: there's a m illio n other straw s un de rnea th it " — M o s D ef. A t som e p o in t d u rin g the y e a r yo u a n d y o u r ro o m m a te w ill ha ve a b lo w o u t. Duke it o u t a n d then g o fo r a b e e r a n d m a ke up.

1 0 . "Fuck y o u , y o u ho e, I d o n 't w a n t y o u b a c k " — Eam on. S a y you a n d y o u r ro o m m a te just c a n 't w o rk it out. Y ou 're tire d o f fin d in g d irty socks in the frid g e a n d p u b ic h a ir on the rem ote c o n tro l. If y o u must le a ve , h a ve som e class. Find a n e w te n a n t b e fo re y o u a b s c o n d o r o ffe r to c o v e r the rent until s om e on e else m oves in.

That's it. I'm d o n e . C u t m y m ike o ff. EazyE, ta ke us to the b rid g e . C u z tha b o y z in tha h o o d a re a lw a y s ha rd . Ya c o m e ta lk in ' th at trash w e ll pull y a c o rd . K n o w in ' nuthin' in life bu t tah b e le g it. D o n 't q u o te m e b o y 'c u z I a in 't s a id shit.

Fo'shizzle. ■

Neurotica

Hopelessly devoted to you cristina. m a rk h a m @ m a il. m cgill. ca

rem em ber the w h o le o rd e a l w ith p a in fu l c la ri­ ty. She w a s s ic k — re a lly s ic k — a n d fo r the first tim e, I d id n 't k n o w h o w to he lp her. W ith m y he art in m y throat, I w ra p p e d her in a b la n ke t a n d ran to the S S M U b u ild in g — the o n ly p la c e I c o u ld think to ta ke her. I, burst through the do or, shoved m y w a y to the b e g in n in g o f the line, a n d in a p a n ic k e d v o ic e I w h im p e re d , "D o y o u k n o w h o w to fix a 1 9 9 8 IB M N o te b o o k running W in d o w s 9 8 ? " M y la p to p , o r O p h e lia , as I have na m e d her, has since re co ve re d from her brush w ith d e a th . She, how ever, is not the sole cause o f m y p a n ic a tta c ks — th e y 're a lso b ro u g h t on b y my

I

C R IS T IN A M A R K H A M

Palm Pilot, m y ce ll p h o n e , m y iPod M in i, a n d my d ig ita l toaster (there a re no a n tiq u a te d "kn obs" fo u n d in m y house, as m y toaster has d ig ita l inte­ gers to d e sig n a te the d e sire d b ro w n in g levels!]

A s a c a rd c a rry in g , techno-lust, com p ute r-lovin g, cybe r-ge ek, I c a n e a s ily b e sed u ce d into bu ying a n y shiny n e w g a d g e t as lo ng as it has buttons a n d m a ke s s o m e s o rt o f b e e p in g n o ise .

Evidently, I'm not a lo n e ... on a short w a lk through the G h e tto , I cou n te d seven iPods, four iPod M in is , a B lackBerry, a n d a cell p h o n e so c o ve re d in buttons I a t first aske d m yself w h y this s e e m in g ly no rm a l y o u n g m an w a s ta lk in g into his calculator.

But this lo ve a ffa ir w ith a ll things te ch ie has its d ra w b a c k s — there is no p a in like th at o f a b ro ­ ken g a d g e t. W h e n a d is p la y freezes o r a song skips, o n e w ill attem pt the most rid iculo us cures: " M a y b e if I ta ke out the batteries a n d let it rest," o r "I k n o w I just restarted it, but m a yb e if I restart it a g a in ," o r w o rs e yet, " W h y is this o v erh ea ting ?

I should put it in the fre e ze r!"

•Sadly, that last m o ron ic rem ed y w a s my p a th e tic attem pt to fix m y Palm Pilot. A s the re p a ir fees a re slig htly m ore than m y m onthly fo o d b u d g e t, I'll b e reverting to pen a n d p a pe r. A n d as a rc h a ic as this m a y be, I'm alm o st sure this n o te b o o k isn't e a sily frie d in a p o w e r surge. ■

N o t as apathetic as the rest of 'em, huh? W e commend you. Be a guest columnist.

Send Dispatch Box submissions (max 5 0 0 words) to oped@ tribune.m cgill.ca Across

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1. Science U ndergraduate Society (abbr.)

4 . Has been do ne to fruit o r flowers 9. You need one to be a law yer 12. C erta in minerals 13. Keep y o u r ______ the ground 14. Debtor's abbr.

15. Im portant C a n . treaty 16. Dorothy's friends: M a n , T., C ro w , S. a n d ___ 17. N ecessary in archery 18. Third sail o f a sloop-rigged boat 2 1 . Anger 22 . Released 2 5 . Bothered 29 . A ctor Stanley 3 0 . Bothered 3 2 . N either he nor she 34 . Sometimes follo w s a co m p any nam e 35. ____________Folds Five 3 6 . 2n d person singular 37 . "B a d a b in g " (The Sopranos) 4 2 . Dawson's mom on the W B 4 4 . Jab 4 5 . Lansbury show, "M u rd e r,___ W ro te " 4 8 . Sometimes used as a garnish 4 9 . Presidential ca n d id a te N a d e r 5 0 . O ld e r half o f do u b le cohort d id these courses 5 1 . Sudden longing 52. M usketeer w e a p o n o f ch oice 5 3 . O u r (in S p a n is h ) 5 4 . Authored or perform ed 5 5 . Perot o r G e l 1er 5 6 . Tom Cruise classic: *_______Business"

Dow n 1. C ry 2. Follows crem ation 3. There are seven, nautically 4 . C ra z y state (Fr.) 5 . Singer M a id a 6 . C urtain or M a id e n 7. M editerran ean vo lcano 8. Lawyer's w a y o f recording time 9 . Long a g o ga m e sh ow (plural) 10. Law (Fr.) 11. Brand sold a t Zellers 19. You can order one in a pub 2 0 . W a te r (Fr.) 23 . M is pelled etcetera (abbr.)

2 4 . "I K now W h a t Y o u ___ Last Summer" 25 . Useful w hen ea ting lobster 26 . Present tense o f "w ere" 2 7 . Raving 28 . Precedes sexual or cycle 3 1 . O ne , in G erm an 3 3 . A position on the line o f scrim m age (football) 36 . After "je " an d before "il" 3 8 . N o t younger, but ‘ 3 9 . W o rld W a r I battle 4 0 . Ivory, Dove a n d Zest 4 1 . W o u ld have been put in a co lo n y in the past 4 2 . Slang for food 4 3 . A djective associated w ith lofts 4 6 . Early '9 0 s Robin W illia m s movie 4 7 . N o t difficult 5 3 . M a ritim e prov.

campus

CHATTERBOX

Rex Brynen's rule Poli Sci's Bry's our guy

S I L H O U ETTE

Battling the gender binary The Women's Union's face-lift reveals a fresher UGE beneath A R TS .M C G ILl.C A

If I w eren 't a professor I w ould b e ... a lu m b erja ck. N o , not really. I've a lw a ys e n jo y e d politics,' research, a n d te a c h in g - it's hard to im a g in e d o in g a n yth in g else.

I am most proud o f... m y kids, D a v id a n d C h lo e . In the university realm , h o w ­ ever, I w o u ld have to say m y students, so m a ny o f w h o m seem to g o on to m ake a real positive d iffe re n c e in the w o rld .

Students fault me for... ta lkin g to o fast, pe rha ps, o r g ra d in g to o ha rd. D uring the POLI 4 5 0 civil w a r sim ulation they also tend to bla m e m e fo r everything else to o: b ird m igrations, a d ve rse w eather, insurgent attacks, la ck o f sleep, their o w n

BRODY BROWN hough a rg u a b ly d isa p p o in tin g for the m ore curious, theres no bra-burning, constant gra n o la -ch o m p in g , anarchypre a ch in g , o r m an-bashing g o in g on in Shatner's room 4 3 3 . There is a g o o d d e a l o f un pa cking a n d re o rg a n iz a tio n as a result o f the U nion fo r G e n d e r Em pow erm ent's recent m ove from its coveted form er lo dg ing s.

The U G E m a d e headlines last y e a r as it fo u g h t to shed its W o m e n s U nion m oniker a n d u p da te its nam e a n d mission.

The U nion has been re c o g n iz in g transgendered p e o p le since 1 9 9 8 , w h e n the ladies a d d e d an am endm ent to their consti­ tution extending m em bership privileges to transgendered per­ sons in the M c G ill com m unity. H ow ever, this m inor mention pro ve d insufficient for. the e x p a n d in g collective, spurring the eventual m etam orphosis o f the W o m e n s U nion into the current UGE. W h e n the service's constitutional changes w e re subm itted for a p p ro va l in O c to b e r of 2 0 0 3 , the Students' Society w a s initially reluctant to a c c e p t the transform ation, expressing a num ber o f concerns in cluding issues like the alien ation o f

T

w o m en. , S m aranda G ra jd ie ru , o n e o f the seven w h o signed the service's n e w constitution, insists the UGE's intention w asn t to m a rg in a liz e its o rig in a l base but to "ope n [the] d o o r to more p e o p le " a n d e n co ura ge others to "fig ht as allies.

The n e w constitution highlights the mission to diversify the collective's m em bership a n d in clude transgendered individ ua ls a n d a w id e r ran ge o f races. This a d d s a little variety to the mix, as a ll four o f the current collective m em bers identify as w hite, non-trans w o m e n . C o m b in e d w ith a beha vio ura l c o d e an d harassm ent policy, the changes, G ra jd ie ru says, "m a ke inclusivity som ething ta n g ib le ."

No money, mo' problems W ith the constitution com m otion b e hind them, the U G E has been a b le to be g in fulfilling its n e w m a ndate, though not w ith ou t their share of obstacles. H a v in g been asked to p a ck up a n d m ove d o w n the hall, the U G E ha rdly seems the d a rlin g o f the S S M U services. W h e n pressed to d e scrib e their go als a n d objectives fo r the semester, Sarah M a n n s, U 3 H istory an d W o m e n 's Studies, reveals the collective's fe a r o f not getting enough fin a n cia l b a ck in g . " W ith shaky fu nding , w e d o n 't k n o w w h a t to expect, she explains, c itin g "S S M U a n d their politics o f getting things d o n e " as the cause for the U nion's d e la ye d start-up.

A nother prom ise that rem ains unfulfilled is the conversion o f a n e arb y w ashroo m into a gender-neutral space.

"The barrier-free w a shroo m is essential, G ra jd ie ru insists.

W ith the U nion still m id-m ove, how ever, the SSM U's half

W HAT...

to OO

to

CL nd U

in c ip ie n t p a ra n o ia , etc. . , , M y courses a re popu lar because... o f ra m p a n t m isinform ation, c o u p le d w ith fe a r a n d in tim id a tio n . Plus, they re not a t 8 : 3 0 in the m orning.

A n effective system of governm ent is ... I m a b ig fa n o f d e m o c ra c y as a w a y o f o rg a n iz in g p o litic a l life, a n d o f a to lera nt m ulticultural society w h ic h celebrates

"Headlights!" she screamed, before letting the giris loose.

diversity. _ , , , A n ineffective system of governm ent is ... as som e on e w h o w o rk s o n the M id d le East a n d its vario us repressive regim es, it's e a sy to see h o w a u tho rita rian­ ism stifles d e b a te , deters the em e rg e n c e o f n e w id e a s, a n d ham pers so cio e co n o m ­ ic de ve lo p m e n t. , , , M y biggest pet peeve in the classroom is ... p ro b a b ly som e o t the classroom s themselves (although the d is s e c tio n /a u to p s y tables in S trathcona a re k ind a c o o l,

o f the bathroom p a c t has ye t to co m e to fruition.

D espite the potential fu nding problem s, the U G E does ha ve a set o f de fin ite g o a ls it intends to pursue o n ce success fully relocated. Included in the plans fo r the y e a r is a list o f safer w ashroom s on cam pus, a series o f w orkshops on issues rang in g from sensitivity a n d fem inist th eory tô anti-racism a n d trans issues a n d a n inform ative sticker c a m p a ig n in all w ashroom s to "re n e w our presence o n cam p us," says G ra jd ie ru .

W h e n asked if the UGE's n e w m and ate overlaps w ith the Transgendered A lliance's m ission, G ra jd ie ru points out that unlike the T G A , the U G E is a SSM U service, w ith a b ig g e r b u d g e t as w e ll as a co-op, lib ra ry a n d m ore concrete mission.

But in a fa irly liberal university environm ent, is there real­ ly a need for such a service? Though a w hite, heterosexual, non-transgendered m ale m a y not see them, the U G E identifies g re a t barriers still in need o f dism antling.

"You have to g iv e y our g e nd er for everything. To a p p ly [to M c G ill] y o u ha ve to d e cla re y our 'o ffic ia l' ge nd er," M a n n s explains, m entioning the health centre as just another p lace w h e re an "ultrage nd ered " b in a ry is reinforced.

As for that a n g ry fem inist im a g e , M a n n s says that is som e­ thing the U G E is still "lo o kin g to c h a n g e ." Perhaps w ith all the un pa cking , on e o f the four m ight stum ble across a dusty shrine to G lo ria Steinem. A n d w ith the m oney that kind o f relic m ight g e t on eBay, the U G E w o n 't have to w o rry a b o u t its SSM U funding fo r years to com e. ■ The collective is op e n a n d currently a c c e p tin g n e w mem­ bers. V is its s m u .m c g ill.c a /w u n io n /m a in .h tm l fo r m ore inform a­

m a X-Files sort o f w a y ). ..................... ( iL l n o o I decided to specialize in politics of the M id d le East because... o f the 1 9 8 2 w a r in Lebanon, on w h ic h I w ro te m y u n d e rg ra d honours thesis. I alm ost w ro te it on the Falklands w a r, but m y w ife co rre ctly c o n v in ce d m e th at the South A tlantic d id n 't have a lot o f g ro w th po ten tia l as a to p ic . .

The most integral aspect o f post-conflict reconstruction is... I think the key to post-conflict reconstruction is u n de rsta nd ing th a t there a re a lot o f things th at have to h a p p e n a t the sam e tim e if societies a re to m ake a lasting transition from w a r to p e a c e . H ow ever, if there is an im m e dia te a n d pressing c h a lle n g e it is the d e m o ­ b iliz a tio n a n d reinte gration o f fo rm er com b ata nts. In Iraq, the US v io la te d the car­ d in a l rule o f p e a c e b u ild in g b y s udd en ly te rm in ating the entire Iraqi a rm e d fo r c e s a n d in so d o in g , putting lots o f a rm e d , u n em plo ye d, bitter y o u n g men on to the streets A developing nation that shows g rea t prom ise is ... Turkey, I think, has m a d e im pressive strides in terms o f both e c o n o m ic c h a n g e a n d p o litic a l d e m o cra tiz a tio n .

There are still m a jo r unresolved issues, in clu d in g the c h a lle n g e o f a c c e p tin g Kurdish cultural identity a n d the c o n tin u in g p o w e r o f the m ilitary, but I m hopeful. O n a per­ sonal level, I'm v e ry fo n d o f the Palestinian territories, a n d e s p e cia lly G a z a .

G a z a n s a re g e n e ra lly in c re d ib ly w a rm a n d v ib ra n t de sp ite g re a t adversity, som e­ thing that TV new s o f v io le n c e , terrorism a n d o c c u p a tio n d o e s n 't rea lly capture. I m no t v e ry o p tim istic a b o u t the prospects fo r Palestinian-lsraeli in the next fe w years, h o w e v e r— w h ic h is tra g ic fo r Palestinians a n d Israelis alike.

M y experience as a student a t the University o f C a lg a ry w a s ... m ixed, a ltho ug h I like d m ost o f the de pa rtm e nt. I like d C a lg a ry — the Rockies w e re so A reliable source for political news is... o n e o f the g re a t bo on s o f the Internet a g e is the a b ility to access new s from m a ny d iffe re n t sources a n d perspectives a ro u n d the w o rld . I rea d a d o z e n o r tw o press sources a d a y on-line, w ith the BBC, W a s h in g to n Post, a n d H a 'a re tz a m o n g m y favourites.

M y favourite junk food is... p iz z a . ■ — - ~ A m n i lc>ri ri\/ \ i~7 A lle m a n d

tion.

W H O ...

La Francofête

Francophiles N etw o rk/R é se a u des Francophiles

Speed D ating

M c G ill Speed Dating

Demonstration

W H E N ...

Sept. 2 3 , all da y

W HERE...

Three Bares park, in front o f Arts Bldg

Sept. 2 1 , 6 p m , Sept. 2 8 , 6p m

Private

C o a litio n Against the D eportation o f Palestinian Refugees

Sept. 9 , 6pm

A tw ater Library, 1 2 0 0 Atw ater Ave. (M etro Atwater)

Students for a sugar a d d ictio n cure

Sept. 16 , as long as it takes

Shatner Ballroom

D ance m arathon*

M c G ill Ranchers Association

Sept. 17, 6 :3 0 a m

Lower field

C o w d riv e *

Techie Junkies U nion

Sept. 2 1 , right after X-Files

Leacock basem ent

C om puter p a rty*

M e d ita tio n for a Better Tom orrow

Sept. 18 to Sept. 2 6

Arts steps

M e d ita tio n *

M c G illia n s for Prettier Seafood Displays

Sept. 2 3 , 5pm

C aferam a, Shatner Bldg

Food presentation*

C h e a p C ig s for CEGEP Kids

Sept. 2 5 , all d a y

M e tro Atw ater

C igarette sale*

CONTACT... reseaudesfranco@ yahoo.ca, 3 9 8 -5 1 0 0 sp eed8 .com refugees@ riseup.net, 5 9 1 -3 1 7 1 dancetilldaw n@ hotm ail.com m oooovethatbeast@ ya h o o .ca ch i psa nd bytes@ gma i 1.com peacebegetspeace@ aol .com pa ella palace @ aol.com haveuhadursm oke2day@ yahoo.ca

s

images1 Seeing red I spy, w ith m y b e a d y e y e s ...'' This g a m e is a lw a y s a treat. Unless, o f course, y o u 're c o lo u r b lin d — in w h ic h ca se, this p a g e is p retty u n d e r-w h e lm in g .

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(5 1 4 ) 8 7 7 - 0 0 9 0 3 5 7 3 S t. L au ren t Blvd. <514) 2 8 8 -0 6 0 0 2 3 6 0 N o tre-D am e St. W .

(5 1 4 ) 9 8 3 -1 6 6 6 P la ce V ille-M arie (5 1 4 ) 3 9 4 -0 0 0 0 8 9 8 4 d e l'A cad ie Blvd.

(5 1 4 ) 3 8 7 -9 9 9 9 1201 G r e e n e Ave. (5 1 4 ) 9 3 3 -8 0 0 0 5 1 5 0 Jean -T alo n S t. W .

(5 1 4 ) 341 -2 2 2 1 5 9 5 4 M e tro p o lita n Blvd. E. (5 1 4 ) 2 5 7 -8 8 2 6 6 2 2 4 A St. Ja cq u e s St. W .

(5 1 4 ) 3 6 9 -4 0 0 0 A lexis N ihon P laza (5 1 4 ) 8 6 5 -9 9 4 9 Place V ersailles (5 1 4 ) 3 5 5 -0 0 0 3

THIS IS FREE ROGERS-TO-ROGERS

Les G ale ries d 'A n jo u (5 1 4 ) 3 5 6 -0 3 5 6 R o cklan d C en tre (5 1 4 ) 7 3 5 -4 0 8 6 9 9 7 S t. A n to in e W. (5 1 4 ) 8 6 6 -3 3 2 6 5 0 5 D e M aiso n n eu v e Blvd. W. ( 5 1 4 )8 4 5 - 8 3 5 3 33 3 9 L d e s So u rces Blvd.

(5 1 4 ) 6 8 3 -3 3 3 3 2 7 5 8 St. C harles Blvd.

(5 1 4 ) 4 2 8 -9 0 0 0 8 4 5 7 N ew m an Blvd.

(5 1 4 ) 3 6 8 -4 0 0 0 C arrefo u r A n grig no n (5 1 4 ) 3 6 8 -4 2 3 0

CALLING. THIS IS THE CHANCE

P lace V ertu (5 1 4 ) 7 4 5 -0 7 4 5 2 1 0 0 M arcel-L aurin Blvd.

(5 1 4 ) 8 5 6 - 1 8 8 4 7 4 0 C ô te -V e rtu Blvd.

(5 1 4 ) 78 9 -0 1 0 1 Fairv iew P o in te-C laire ( 5 1 4 )6 9 5 - 1 5 5 4 C o m p le xe D esjard ins (5 1 4 ) 8 4 2 -0 2 8 8 BOUCHERVILLE P ro m e n ad es M on tarviile (4 5 0 ) 4 4 9 -4 9 9 8

TO WIN A NEW M INI. THIS IS

BROSSARD 7 0 0 5 T asch ereau Blvd.. S u ite 150 (4 5 0 ) 926-3111 M ail C ham plain (4 5 0 ) 6 7 1 -3 3 0 0 P lace P o rto b ello (4 5 0 ) 6 7 1 -4 7 4 4 ÇANQIAÇ 8 7 B -4 M arie-V icto rin Blvd. ( 4 5 0 )4 4 4 - 2 1 0 0 CHÂTEAUGÜAY 129 S t. J e a n -B a p tis te Blvd.

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featu re politics the

cleath when convention brokers for collective grief NATALIE FLETCHER ur fa ir institution has recently been an a p p e n d a g e on h e a d lin e s w e w o u ld rather n o t see in n a tio n a l n e w sp a p e rs. O n e o f o u r o w n , K athleen Currier, w a s fo und in her do rm room last w e e k e n d , her university c a re e r a m ere tw o w ee ks o ld , cause o f cleath still un kn ow n. Though d e a th m a y v a ry in m e a n in g d e p e n d in g on in d iv id u a l beliefs a n d lifestyles, w h e n it occurs w ith in a com m un ity like M c O ill its im p a c t o u g h t to b e a p p ro p ria te ly a c k n o w le d g e d a n d assessed. S adly, it seems con­ tusion, fe a r a n d in d iffe re n ce have arisen w h e re reflection a n d a w a re n e ss should have, le avinq m a ny students w ith o u t the p ro p e r m eans to grieve.

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D eath and th e student The m o de rn e q u iva le n t o f g rie v in g has d o n e a w a y w ith trad! tio n a l m o urn ing rituals in fa vo u r o f a m ore c a lc u la tiv e , in h ib ite d a p p ro a c h fo u n d e d on the silent u n de rsta nd ing th at a p p ro p ri­ ate behaviour, h o w e v e r ill-defined, is not o n ly essential but e n fo rc e a b le .

"M o re often, a culture attem pts to m o d e ra te the m ourners fe elings, neither d e n y in g g rie f no r luxuriat­ ing in it, e xp la in s K atherine A shen bu rg in her b o o k The M o u rn e r's D a n c e : W h a t W e D o W h e n P eople D ie (N o rth Point Press, 2 0 0 2 ). The result is a rela­ tionship w ith de ath th a t is rea ctive rather than reflexive, b re e d in g repression rather than co n ­ scious stances on a fa te th at defines hum anness.

In c re a s in g ly in d iv id u a lis tic o u tlo o k s h a v e d e cre a s e d interactions w ith d e a th : b y the tim e th ey hit 2 0 , m a ny C a n a d ia n s ha ve h a d little if a n y expe rien ce s w ith loss.

Students d o n ’t k n o w h o w to d e a l w ith d e a th , asserts John W . H e ilm a n , a professor w ith M c G ills history d e p a rtm e n t w h o recently lost o n e o f his students to a fa ta l c a r 'crash. H e recounts h o w the sense o f insecurity a n d s ta g n a tio n e x p e rie n ce d b y the students classm ates even tua lly b e ca m e a s e e d b e d o f discussion a n d disclosure. S h a rin g m em ories o f their frie n d s life a llo w e d them to see her d e a th as the e n d o f a beautiful sentence" rather than as a p e rva sive interruption.

Its im p o rta n t to share g rie v in g ,” he a d d s . "The w ro n g thing to d o is tre at d e a th like an ob scen ity."

N o news, no m o urning O f course, fo r m any, y o u n g deaths seem a ll the m ore offen sive a n d a re tre ate d as such.

In c o n te m p o ra ry C a n a d ia n culture, d e a th is ty p ic a lly seen as a c c e p ta b le if it com es a t the e n d o f a |on g life a n d ends a p e rio d o f d e te rio ra tio n ," say H e rb e rt C . N o rth c o tt a n d D on na M . W ils o n , authors o f D y in g a n d D eath in C a n a d a (G a ra m o n d , 2 0 0 1 ). "There is a b e lie f th at if life is live d respo nsibly a n d correctly, then things w ill turn o u t w e ll."

S ince it w a s prem ature, C u rrie rs d e a th is p e rce iv e d not o n ly as m ore tra g ic , bu t a lso as m ore ta b o o . D etails surround­ ing the in c id e n t a re u n n e rvin g ly fe w : the results o f the a u to p ­ sy rem ain unknow n a n d w ill likely never b e released p u b ­ licly. This m eans that as a student bo d y, ou r c o lle c tiv e m em ­ o ry o f the event is w ith o u t c ontent a n d thus w ith o u t purpose.

The question rem ains: d o w e d e se rve to k n o w w h a t h a p p e n e d ? If C u rrie rs d e a th w a s s o m e h o w p re v e n ta b le — a s u icid e , a lc o h o l p o is o n in g , dru g o v e rd o s e — w o u ld it not be b e n e fic ia l fo r students to k n o w the facts? Instead, m any U p p e r Residents a re c irc lin g their n e w hom es th inkin g the w orst, no t even k n o w in g th at "suspicious d e a th " is the d e fa u lt term fo r a n y d e a th o c cu rin g ou tside h o sp ita l do ors.

the m cgill tribune | 14.9.04 | feature ] 5 It seems le g a litie s a n d conven tio n a re k e e p in g d e a th fro m in form ing life. C urrier's fa m ily is a llo w e d to w ith h o ld in form ation; M c G ill Security must g o through the fo rm al chan ne ls b e fo re c h e c k in g u p on resi­ dents; M c G ill C o u n s e llin g Services c a n n o t b re a c h c o n fid e n tia lity clauses. A t w h a t p o in t d o e s respect fo r p riv a c y a n d a d h e re n c e to etiquette b e co m e in d iffe re n c e ?

A lo n e in a crow d It's n o secret th at m ystery fuels fear. The threat o f terrorism is an o b vio u s exa m p le .

"If the sam e d a n g e ro u s even t occurs to tw o p o p u la tio n s o f subjects, a n d o n e k now s w h e n it is g o in g to o c cu r a n d the other g ro u p d o e s not k n o w w h e n th at even t is g o in g to. h a p p e n , the latter g ro u p show s m uch m ore stress,” confirm s Karim N a d e r, a professor w ith M c G ill's p s y c h o lo g y de p a rtm e n t. "In o rd e r to c o p e y o u ne ed to k n o w w h a t the d a n g e r is a n d ha ve a w a y that re lia b ly protects y o u from that d a n g e r."

W h e n no form o f p ro te c tio n is a v a ila b le , how ever, c o n fo rm ity pro vid e s a n ich e in w h ic h fe a r ca n b e n e g a te d . " W e seek security b y ty in g in to a system that w ill m eet o u r d e p e n d e n c y needs a n d h e lp us d e n y o u r in trin s ic v u ln e ra b ility ,” e x p la in s R ob ert K astenbaum in his b o o k The P sycholog y o f D eath (Springer, 2 0 0 0 ). Rather than ad d re ss an xièly, w e la b e l it as a w ea kn ess th a t im pe des ou r a b ility to fulfill s o c ia l g o a ls . Still, it is coun terintu itive fo r us to rush to for­ g e t fo r the sake o f co n v e n ie n ce w h e n re c o n c ilin g em otions c a n better serve ou r life ou tlo oks. "The fa te o f c iv iliz a tio n as w e ll as the m aturation o f the in d iv id u a l requires a g re a te r w illin g ­ ness to c o n te m p la te d e a th ."

P hilosophizing death W h ile d e a th c a n serve as a rem in der th a t life should b e c e le b ra te d , it. c a n a lso un de rscore o u r o w n vuln erab ility, m a king us hypersensitive a b o u t the passing o f tim e.

"The w h o le M c G ill com m unity, a n d e s p e c ia lly the students, feels this te rrible ioss, w h ic h a lso confronts e v e ry o n e w ith their o w n fin itu d e ," affirm s G a e lle Fiasse, an assistant professor w ith M c G ill's d e p a rtm e n t o f p h ilo s o p h y a n d fa cu lty o f re ligiou s studies. "In e v e ry d a y life, tim e a p p e a rs to us as a continuum w ith its hectic rhythm , but this p o in t o f rupture m akes us co n fro n t the fu n d a ­ m ental questions th a t w e som etim es try to e s c a p e but a re nevertheless essential be ca u se they also g iv e sense to ou r lives. W h a t m akes m e truly hum an? W h a t a re the im p o rta n t ch o ice s th a t le a d m y d e cisions? If it w e re m y last d a y, h o w w o u ld I like to have live d it?

A c c o rd in g to m a ny W e s te rn thinkers, n o ta b ly the G e rm a n p h ilo so p h e r M a rtin H e id e g g e r, p a rt o f livin g a u th e n tica lly involves the re c o g n itio n o f death's im m inen ce . Such a re a liz a tio n c o n ­ firm s that our life d o e s in d e e d m atter to us a n d th at w e a re respo nsible fo r it. U nfortunately, authen­ ticity often loses o u t to the d a ily g rin d .

"This un d e rsta n d in g o f d e a th is som ething th a t w e ty p ic a lly g iv e e ve ry sign o f repressing o r d e n y in g in o u r e v e ry d a y live s," says Stephen M u lh a ll, an O x fo rd fe llo w w h o sp e c ia liz e s in post K antian ph ilo so ph y. "In a v o id in g th e fa c t th at e a ch o f us has ou r o w n , a n d o n ly ou r o w n , de ath to d ie , [w e ] a v o id the fa c t th at e a ch o f us has ou r o w n , a n d o n ly ou r o w n , life to live .'

The conseq uen ce s o f o v e rlo o k in g the deaths in ou r m idst a re g ra ve . They translate into de se n sitize d attitu de s— think Putin, w h o grossly a n d u n a p o lo g e tic a lly un de restim a te d the num ber o f casualties in the Beslan ho stage crisis; th,ey ro b d e a th o f its m e ta p h ysica l d im e n sio n s— think s uicid e b o m b e rs a n d th eir w e-have-nothing-to-lose attitude; th ey result in e u ph em istic la n g u a g e th at causes us to spea k o b liq u e ly a b o u t o u r o w n m o rta lity — think slum ber room as a substitute fo r fu nera l parlour.

O u r p re o c c u p a tio n w ith a n d a c tiv e ren un cia tio n of d e a th p ro ve th a t it is not m erely a b io lo g ic a l event. Even as strangers w e fe el the s o cia l a n d cultural ram ifica tio ns o f a d e a th in o u r im m e d ia te environm ent. Protocol doused in p o litic a l correctness should not supp lan t g rie v in g . W h a t w e in d iv id u a lly b e lie ve a b o u t de ath is irrelevant; h o w w e express it c o lle c tiv e ly is not. As A shen bu rg rem inds us, "M is e ry loves c o m p a n y for e xce llent rea so ns." ■

CYNICALLY SPEAKING

Not so pretty, cleans up well "A c yn ic is a m an w ho , w hen he smells flo w ­ perpetuate the w o rk o f A m erica's favourite N a z i.

That's right, y o u slaves to inextinguishable trends, ers, looks a ro u n d fo r a coffin. " — H . L. M e n cke n M r. Von Dutch, née Kenneth H o w a rd , w a s a proud a n d cantankerous lover o f the Third Reich. A n d for hy is it that p e o p le w h o d ie suddenly o r in som e reason, a lot o f p e o p le a re w illin g to fork over tra g ic accide nts a re qu ickly p la c e d on the b ig bucks fo r the w hores-for-cash descendants pedestals, regardless o f h o w they con­ o f the h a rd -b o o zin g , violent, p a ra n o id hermit. Still ducted their lives? It seems o n ly the best g ra d e s sur­ missing reasons to rea lly loathe the o ld big o t? O n vive the in divid ua l's passing. W o m a n iz e rs, drug to p o f his delightful personality, a sloshed-as-always ad dicts, adulterers a n d liars are cleansed o f their H o w a rd totaled his c a r in the 19 6 0 s , caus­ sins a n d scrubbed to salvation just in tim e fo r hearty, ing his shotgun-riding w ife to m iscarry dra w n-ou t p u b lic a d o ra tio n . Speeches a re com ­ their unborn baby.. N o w that's posed, monuments erected, a n d airports a n d serv­ rom ance! In a c h arm ing jusE ice roa ds renam ed in a fra ntic effort to m em orialize, before -he c ro a k e d letter, all the w h ile silencing c a n d id criticism . H ere are just crankiness turns into ven­ h a tre d as a fe w o f the m any Frank Sinatras, Strom Thurmonds om ou s a n d S aint Augustines w h o se im m ortalized status are H o w a rd expresses his distaste fo r a land qu estio nab le a t best.

Princess D ia n a — H o w does o n e g o from full o f "n ig g e rs , and be in g a rid icule d bulim ic w h o is o p e n ly resented b y M e x ic a n s the in-law s to an in te rn a tio n a lly c e le b ra te d hum ani­ Jew s"; undoubted­ tarian a n d c a n d id a te fo r sainthood? Luckily for ly a n u n co m fo rt­ D iana's reputation, there w e re several factors a b le p la c e fo r a responsible fo r p ro p e llin g her im a g e into a d ivine man w h o claim s to realm . A d d o n e p a rt loveless m a rriag e a n d messy "have a lw a y s been m arital strife to on e po rtio n o f m ultiple lovers a n d a N a z i" a n d longs steam y affairs, introduce a fe w c o n s p ira cy theories fo r th e " lo g ic " o f a n d g o o d looks, a n d you can g e t the w h o le w o rld Hitler's po licie s. As noninterested. Even the best PR p e o p le co u ld n 't com e N a z is , w e take com fort up w ith a better form ula for differentiating oneself in the id e a o f H o w a rd 's from the scores o f nameless royal fa m ily m embers. he ad likely com busting if he A n d really, w h o is it m ore fun to lavish obscene k n e w h o w m any o f those m aterial­ am ounts o f praise on: the g o o d y g o o d y C a th o lic istic "niggers, M e x ic a n s a n d Jews" M o th e r Teresa w h o d ie d shortly after the British w e re currently overe xp osing his line.

JFK and R eag an — O h the presidents, such b a b e o r the glam orous, tra g ic , em otion al, netw ork­ d ra m a queens in life, a n d such overrated heroes in ing D iana?

Eva Peron — Rags to riches is a p o p u la r sce­ death, f ie chea ted on Jackie, h a d an a d d ic tio n to nario, but w he n the ascent is m a d e b y a w o m a n painkillers, a n d oo ps, in itiate d the em barrassing accused o f skillful social-clim bing, u n brid le d a m b i­ B ay o f Pigs invasion. It has also been insinuated tion a n d m a nipulation o f men, it's a w a rd ^ v o rth y ... that his c ru c ia T W e s t V irg in ia w in in the 1 9 6 0 o r a t least M a d o n n a -p la y in g 7 0 u-in-an-Andrew - D em ocratic prim aries ha d a hetptng ha nd in the L lo y d -W e b b e r-m o v ie -a n d -s u b s e q u e n t-G o ld e n - form ation o f the M a fia . But w ith that sparkling smile, G lob e-w orthy. Peron w a s the 2 0 th century's M a rie firm ba ckside a n d tradem ark p o litician c o if, it's hard Antoinette, the A rge ntinia n H illa ry C linton, d o g g e d to persecute C a m e lo ts m oral foibles. C o m e on, hot b y rumours that she controlled her husband an d p e o p le c a n d o no w ro n g .

W ith the recént passing o f Ronnie, a k a the secretly ran the country. Though her po licie s m ay not have a lw a ys be en the most ethical, her g o o d G ip p e r, w e p la y e d w itness to a round-the-clock fashion sense seem ed to m ake up fo r shady b o o k ­ m e dia frenzy. It o n ly seems a p p ro p ria te that the d a r­ keep ing , intim ida tio n o f the press a n d un a p o lo g e tic ling o f the op ulent '8 0 s receive over-the-top cover­ fa m ily favouritism . As p e o p le w e n t hungry a n d suf­ a g e . For us, how ever, it is hard to think fond fered in squalour, Peron kept her closets full a n d her thoughts o f a man w h o cut $ 4 1 -billion from w e lfa re shoe racks c ro w d e d . Though she m a d e her w a y up program s (yet spent $ 16-m illion on his inauguration from b a d actress to dictator's w ife , her transgres­ cerem onies), consid ered ketchup to b e a v e g e ta b le sions w e re all fa irly p a rd o n a b le after a he roic tussle in the nations subsid ize d school lunch pro gra m an d w ith uterine cancer. A n d fo r pretty po litic a l blondes, ra c k e d up a $ 1 . 5 -trillio n d e fic it w ith his posthum ous a c cla im is p ra ctica lly gu ara nte ed in the R eaganom ic po licie s. W h a t really detracts from his supposed fabulousness, in ou r o p in io n , is his stance coroner's report.

Von Dutch— There a re m any w h o have con­ on the AID S e p id e m ic , w h ic h he refused to tem pt fo r the ubiquitous lin e — "Von Sucks" a n d "Von a c k n o w le d g e until the sixth y e a r o f his presidency.

W

D ouche" d o n 't sound like p e t nam es— but an eq u a l­ ly s iza ble a n d stubborn p o pu lation determ ined to

— Liz A lle m a n g a n d B ro d y B row n

PHO TO S BY YASEM IN EMORY

INDECENT

PROPOSALS

The cult of the afterlife A fe w perspectives on d e a th through the re ligiou s lo o k in g g la s s...

H a re Krishna. You see them d ra p e d in o ra n g e , w ith shiny b a ld he ad s, h a n d in g o u t pa m phlets a n d s p re a d in g g o o d cheer. Born from H ind uism , the Krishnas share m a n y o f the sam e d o c ile ph ilo so p h ie s. They b e lie ve th at y o u r last thought b e fo re d e a th determ ines w h a t sort o f b o d y y o u 'll ta ke in the next life. If y o u s c re w u p ro y a lly in this lifetim e, y o u II p a y fo r it in the next, as re in c a rn a tio n is a fu nda m e nta l H a re p rin c ip le .

This give s "lo w e r s pecie s" a c h a n ce to a d v a n c e a n d re w a rd s g o o d b e h a vio u r this lifetim e w ith a c h a n ce to live o u t their desires in the next.

H m ong . O rig in a tin g in Laos, m a ny H m o n g ha ve im m igrat­ e d from the ru g g e d South P acific to the diverse, c o sm o p o lita n m e trop olis kn o w n a s ... M in n e a p o lis-S t. Paul. The H m o n g b e lie ve th at w h e n o n e o f th eir o w n passes, his o r her soul must

travel b a c k to e v e ry p la c e it has ever live d until it reaches the b u ria l site o f its p la c e n ta . O n ly after the soul is dressed in the p la c e n ta l ja ck e t (does it c o m e in a m edium a n d m a y b e w ith a ho od ?) c a n it travel to b e reunited w ith ancestors a n d reincar­ n a ted . Though the p ro sp e ct o f a transcontinental ro a d trip sounds like fun, the "a re w e there ye t? " fa c to r m akes som e think th at it w ill b e a v e ry lo n g afterlife.

Scientology. Though there a re m a n y po te n tia l fa cto rs at w o rk , w e think th at the pro fession al d o w n fa ll o f G re a s e Lightning him self, John Travolta, c a n b e linked to his proS c ie n to lo g y m antra. B efore jo in in g this self-im provem ent "reli­ g io n " he w a s a d isc o -d a n c in g stud; a fte rw a rd s , he w a s a b ra ze n , d re a d lo c k e d a lie n from the future in B a ttle fie ld Earth. L. Ron H u b b a rd , the cre a to r o f S cien tology, says th at a fter de ath , a s e p a ra tio n o ccu rs b e tw e e n the sp irit a n d the b o d y . The spir­ it takes w ith him "o ld tin cans, rattling chains, b ric-a -b rac an d

other e n e rg y p h e n o m e n a " a n d stashes it in the next bo dy.

H m m m ... sounds like so m e b o d y's a p a c k rat. R em em ber L. Ron, o b je cts a re o n ly m a terial; m em ories a re m a d e o f w ha t's inside.

K ab b a lah . If som eone h a d s a id th at M a d o n n a w o u ld b e co m e a yum m y mummy, w ife a n d author, fe w w o u ld n 't have b e lie v e d them . If som e on e s a id th at she w a s g o in g to b e a d e d ic a te d ka b b a list, the w o rld w o u ld have g o n e into shock. It's the trend th at is so m uch m ore than those tre n d y $ 2 6 string bracelets. K a b b a la h is ba se d o n fo llo w e rs, like the M a te ria l G irl, p la c in g little im p o rta n ce o n m aterial g o o d s . In the afterlife y o u ha ve the thrill o f a tte n d in g yo u r o w n fu nera l. W h a t's even m ore e x citin g is w h e n y o u g e t to w itness yo u r c o ffin b e in g lo w ­ ere d into the g ro u n d , w o rm s en tering yo u r b o d y a n d y our form s lo w ly d e c a y in g . If that isn't en tertainm ent, w e d o n 't k n o w w h a t ic ■ — Liz A lle m a n g

a&e © ance Quatre femmes Quarantaine en Danse-Cité M anic cries and the search for happiness d a n ce d like youVe never seen

T

LISETREUTLER

his is n o t y o u r g ra n d m o th e rs c o tillio n . The scene is sim ple: a n intim ate d a n c e stu d io w ith tw o m usicians, a cellist a n d a pian ist, on eithe r s id e o f a p a le b lue ca n va s b a c k d ro p . The prem ise o f the p e rfo rm a n ce is e q u a lly e a sy to g ra sp : four w o m e n pushing forty. It's like S ex a n d the C ity, minus the sex scenes a n d w itty banter a b o u t shoe obsessions.

H o ld o ff on y o u r im m e d ia te o p in io n s — Q u a ra n ta in e is n o ge n tle ba lle t, no r is it a sim p le tribute to a m onum ental b irth d a y. T hough it be gins w ith a soothin g a c a p e lla s o lo o f " W a ltz in g

It w ill take you through yo u r past a n d tow ards yo u r future.

M a tild a ," the v ib e im m e d ia te ly sw itches to o n e o f m a n ic urgency. There a re fo ur fe m a le da ncers, e q u a l in ta len t a n d energy, e a ch te llin g p ieces o f the story. Their lives a re shrou de d b y th eir up co m ­ ing 4 0 th birthd ays; e a ch w o m a n b e g in s to p a n ic in her o w n w a y , b e it a c tin g n e u ro tic a lly selfassured, hesitating, d re a m in g o f a d a y w h e n men e x p e rie n ce p re g n a n c y o r s im p ly s cre a m in g for ha pp ine ss w h ile c h o k in g on the w o rd .

The them e o f the search fo r ha pp ine ss a n d self-love is th e c o n c e p t o n w h ic h Q u a ra n ta in e is built. A s the a u d ie n c e is taken through the d a ncers' jo urne y o f traum a a n d u n re a liz e d dre am s, e a ch p ie c e — b e it spoken w o rd , a d a n c e s o lo to instru­ m ental m usic, o r d a n c e c o m b in e d w ith lyrics— res­ onates d e e p w ith in . The p e rfo rm a n ce w a rn s a t the start: it w ill ta ke y o u through y o u r p a st a n d to w a rd s y o u r future. If y o u 're n e a rin g the b ig four-oh yo u r­ self, w e ll— Q u a ra n ta in e should b e a m a n d a to ry v ie w in g exp e rie n ce .

O n the strength o f the m o vin g vignettes them ­ selves, Q u a ra n ta in e w o u ld b e a g o rg e o u s pe r­ fo rm a n ce , but the talents o f the d a ncers a n d musi­ c ia n s a d d m ore than m ost c o u ld h o p e for. A n n e Bruce Falconer, Jane M a p p in , M a th ild e M o n n a rd a n d C a ro l Prieur w e a v e th eir in d iv id u a l v ib ra n c ie s to g e th e r to c re a te a fa bulou s te am . The d a n c e is v io le n t a n d ro b o tic o n e m inute a n d c a lm in g ly flu id the next. A d d to this th eir adventurous spirits in tak­ in g o n a p ro je c t w h e re th ey a re re q u ire d to both sing a n d a c t... it seem s a m iracle.

C h a rm a in e LeBlanc's lum inous co m p o sitio n s c re a te a rich ta pestry b e h in d the da ncers, de sp ite b e in g p la y e d on a s ing le c e llo a n d a sin g le p ia n o .

W ith in e a c h s ong is a fa m ilia rly lush sound. You feel like y o u 'v e h e a rd this m usic be fore , but you ha ve n't. S om eh ow , LeBlanc has c o m p o s e d music w e a ll k n o w in s id e — just like w e a ll k n o w w h a t the four w o m e n a re seeking.

D anse-C ité has c re a te d a b rillia n t seasonopener. Q u a ra n ta in e haunts a n d leaves its vie w e rs utterly nonplussed. But like a birth d a y, the run is q u ic k; b lin k a n d it's g o n e . Just d o n 't b lin k fo r Q u a ra n ta in e . ■

HANDS OFF THE C A N V A S

Freaks, geeks and those who just love slash unite!

LISETREUTLER ver be en a Trekkie? N o , scratch that. O n c e y o u 're a Trekkie, y o u 're a lw a y s a Trekkie, a n d the sam e go es fo r m ost other sci-fi classics w ith notorious fa n bases. Trekkies live fo r Star Trek m arathons a n d never cease a rg u in g o ver w he the r V oyager is better than The N e x t G e n e ra tio n , o r w h e th e r the creators should ha ve sim p ly stuck w ith the o rig in a l. X-Philes jo yfu lly unite . in n itpicking e v e ry d e ta il o f The X-Files reruns, but d iv id e w ith d e e p scow ls w h e n the to p ic o f "A re y o u a ship per? " com es up.

G e t a n y o f that? By no w , yo u must a t least understand that cult sci-fi show s have, w e ll, cults o f their o w n , m uch like the D ea d h e a d s, w h o e m erg ed in the 6 0 s to fo llo w their fa vo urite b a n d a n d still exist to day, though in d im inishin g numbers.

The w ritin g o f fa n fic tio n — w h ic h , fo r the un initiated, involves w ritin g fic tio n a l stories a b o u t yo u r fa vo urite chara cte rs /b a n d m e m b e rs /ce le b ritie s a n d often po sting them onlin e fo r all to re a d — has lo ng be en c a su a lly o v e rlo o k e d as a sci-fi nerd activity. (Hey, it g a v e them som ething to d o be tw ee n episodes.) Lately, how ever, there's been no shorta ge o f fa n fic, as it's a ffe c tio n a te ly c a lle d , in a n y genre. You like a b a n d ?

E

C h a n c e s a re y o u 'll fin d som e strange tw ist in their p lo t out in c yb e rsp a c e . Seen Lord o f the Rings o r H a rry Potter? If y o u 're so in c lin e d ... yes, there is m ore fa n fic than this w o rld ever ne e d e d a v a ila b le fo r y o u r re a d in g . A q u ic k sum m ary: s im p ly g o o g le "fa n fic " a n d y o u 'll fin d Lois & C la rk archives, extensive lists o f pe t peeves in fa n fic w ritin g , articles on h o w to a c h ie v e fa m e in y our chosen subject a re a a n d an extrem ely la rg e am o u n t o f a n im e fa n fic, though s o m e h o w it seems to d e fe a t the purpose.

Rest assured, yo u r favourites w ill b e o u t there. But w h e n you fin d them , h o w d o y o u k n o w w h a t to rea d? This, m y frie nd , is

c o m fo rta b le b e d , a n d th ey're both a w e e b it tire d ... y o u g e t the id e a . Slash - rem em ber that term, w he the r y o u 're o ff on the hunt, o r ha ve a lre a d y sto p p e d re a d in g in fear.

But w h y bother w ith fa nfic? Yes, it's com m on , but not in the w a y g o in g to see a film a t C in é m a d u Parc is. It's different, un co nvention al a n d just p la in w e ird a t times, bu t y o u 'd b e sur­ prised h o w m a ny p e o p le secretly a d m it to a t least re a d in g it.

Fanfic, ne w sg ro up s a n d m essage b o a rd s a re a ll w a y s fo r fans to in tera ct w ith e a ch other a n d discuss their latest e s ca p a d e s . It's c re ative w ritin g in a d iffe re n t v e in — entertainm ent that should not

For fanfic w ritiers, slash fic is a w o rld o f its o w n , w h e re m a n y never e n te r— a n d just as m a n y never leave. w h e re the never-ending a n d e ve r-g ro w in g b a n k o f te rm in o lo g y com es in handy. Take "slash," fo r exa m p le . Sim ple punctuation, right? Yes, but fo r fa n fic w riters, slash fic is a w o rld o f its o w n , w h e re m a ny never e n te r— a n d just as m a n y never leave. Think A g e n t M u ld e r a n d Assistant D irector Skinner in ve stiga ting an a b a n d o n e d crim e scene. Instead o f e vid e n ce , they fin d a rather

so e a sily b e dism issed. Love it o r hate it, fa n fic is o n e o f today's guiltiest pleasures. O n b e h a lf o f a ll the fa ndo m s a n d the n o w dev irg in iz e d readers, kudos to the internet fo r p ro v id in g a forum for p ro u d ly nerdy, un in hib ite d w ritin g .

G o a h e a d a n d e xp lo re . Your friends w o n 't la u g h — unless yo u s h o w them y o u r n e w b ie attem pts. ■

the m cgill tribune | 14.9.04 ] a&e ] 7

PREVIEWS

New director of the Musée d'art contem porain

MUSIC. M83— Cabaret Music Hall— 2111 M83. DeadCities, RedSeas&LostGhosts Boulevard St-Laurent— Sept. 15. H aving just released their second album, Dead Cities, Red Seas and Lost Ghosts, the French electronic duo M 8 3 will blow fans a w a y at C ab aret M usic Hall this W ednesd ay. M 8 3 masterfully combines the classic mid-90s techno and dance beats that w e all remember so w ell with com puterized vo ice machines and intermittent guitar. These rhythms evoke images of a warm , fuzzy am biance that will send your mind to the Centaurus g alaxy for which

Continued from front page.

the band is named.

taken a n interest in c o n te m p o ra ry fem inist art,^ n o tab ly Ju d y C h ic a g o 's ic o n ic w o rk , "The D inner Party. H e has sp ent the p a st three y e a r s a t the Brooklyn M u se u m of A rt in N e w Yo rk, w h e re he contributed to the d e v e lo p ­ ment o f the E liza b e th A . S a c k le r C e n te r for Fem inist Art a n d w o rk e d on a n exh ib itio n of Je a n -M ic h e l B a s q u ia ts

MOVIES.

w o rk . r . • S o the question is, h o w is this an g lo -tran co fem inist A m e rica n -O n ta ria n g o in g to rep resent the cultural n e e d s o f the b ilin g u a l c ity o f M o n tre a l in the staun chly French p ro v in c e o f Q u e b e c ? /( "M o n treal h a s its fin g e r on the pu lse o f the w o rld , s a y s M a y e r. T h e c ity is truly c o sm o p o lita n , representing a pletho ra o f cultures that in c lu d e s, o f c o u rse , tourist cu l­ ture. M a y e r p la n s on e m p h a siz in g this intern ation al cul­ ture in the m useum . Restricting c o n te m p o ra ry C a n a d ia n a n d ev e n Q u é b é c o is art w ithin a strictly lo c a l sp h e re is im p o ssib le , he s a y s . B y d e fin itio n , C a n a d ia n art is multicultural, reflecting g lo b a l realities a lb e it in its o w n lo c a l w a y .

A s M a y e r e x p la in s , the h o p e d e riv e d from uniting w o rld a rt is "w h a t m useum s a r e for." W h ile w o rk in g in N e w Yo rk, he w itn e sse d the c o lla p s e o f the Tw in T o w ers on S e p te m b e r 1 1, 2 0 0 1 . T h e d irecto r o f the m useum for w h ic h he w o rk e d c h o se to rem ain o p e n for the d a y . " W e got lo ve letters a fte rw a rd s for it, b e c a u s e p e o p le n e e d e d u s," M a y e r e x p la in s . " O n e w o m a n w ro te this a m a z in g letter. S h e n e e d e d to re co n n e ct w ith th e-w o n d ers o f a ll r a c e s , c re e d s a n d co lo u rs in a w a y that m useum s c a n m a ke p o s sib le . To se e a room full of Islam ic a rt a n d to se e nothing but b eauty, to reconfirm yo u r instincts a b o u t h u m an ity— this w a s a n e xtra o rd in a r­ ily w o n d erfu l th ing."

S o it is w ith intern ation al visio n a n d a n e y e for c o n ­ te m p o ra ry Q u é b é c o is a rt that this multi-cultural a n d multi-cultured m an w ill q u ietly usher in a n e w e ra fo rth e M u s é e d 'A rt C o n te m p o ra in d e M o n tre a l. T h e w o rld is w a tc h in g . ■

Cinéma du Parc— Sept.

Albert Einstein.

COMEDY. O n C B C this Friday, the talent from the Just for Laughs com edy festival will showcase their w a ck y skills in front of a national-crowd. The hilarious lineup of comedians travels to 18 different cities across C a n a d a as part of the Just For Laughs Unleashed... Across Canada tour. Hosted by C an ad ian icon Rick M ercer and featuring some of the best comics this country has to offer, Unleashed will be shown on C B C this Friday at 9 :0 0 p m . So hook up your V CRs for this one (that is, unless you have no friends, and plan on staying hom e... what a sad little life).

ART. The Resonance of the Double— Musée d'Art Contemporain— 185 Rue Ste-Catherine O. Begins Sept. 17. If you happen by the M usée d'Art Contemporain, you have the opportunity to witness The Resonance o f the Double, beginning Friday. As artistic director of O Vertigo, the show's producer, Ginette Laurin, offers the first of six instalments at the M usée. Resonance tells the story of identical twins, through a combinatjon of d an ce, visual arts, live performance and video. Laurin is one of the most renowned figures in the modern dance scene around C a n a d a .

C h e c k out the Preview s Listings on p a g e 17 for the next b ig exhibit a t the A M C M , T h e R e so n a n c e o f the D o u b le .

Stupidity—

14-16. C iném a du Parc offers proud citizens anoth­ er chance to view Albert Nerenberg's amusing doc­ umentary examining the nature of stupidity. W ith a "cast” including such notable liberals as Noam Chomsky and Bill M aher, this film delivers a sharp political angle, w hile at the same time examining the likes of Johnny Knoxville's Jackass. C om e cele­ brate the o n eyea r anniversary of its release by laughing at those whose antics make you look like

MACM.ORG

THEATRE. Jesus Hopped the "A" Train— Geordie Space Theatre— 103-4001 Rue Berri Sept. 15-19. Stephen Adly G uirgis brings us his thought-provoking portrayal of a young man, who becomes incarcerated in an Am erican prison. The protagonist is aw aiting trial for shooting a priest in the buttocks, while his best friend is whisked a w a y into a religious cult. Dubbed "a rewed-up Law & Order" by Hour, this play explores the nether regions of a system about which w e hear a lot, but rarely appreciate in a visceral w ay.

COMEDY. On the Spot Improv— Sept. 14-15 The seven-person ad-lib com edy act known as "O n the Spot Improv" has toured most of the w o rld ... and now they've landed right on our proverbial front door. These am azingly creative stage artists from the beaches of H a w aii have won numerous aw a rd s, including the Just for Laughs W orld Improv Cham pionships. Loosely inspired by the famous gang at W hose Line is it Anyway?, O n the Spot involves a unique flavour of improvisation, including character portrayals and even crow d participation.

They can be seen today and W edn esd ay at C om edy W orks.

MUSIC. Le Swimming— 3643 Boulevard StLaurent— Sept. 19. M oses M ayes and the Funk Family Orchestra, a funk-electronica group from W innipeg that w as featured in the Tribune earlier this month, is playing Le Swimming Sunday evening.

The incredibly fan-friendly and energetic septet, led

by M C G rant Paley, is coming off a well-received perform ance at M ontreal's International J a z z Festival. Their sound combines both recent and 7 0 s style ja z z beats, influenced by an eclectic mix of music icons, from Herbie H ancock to Jamiroquai to the Beastie Boys.

Ph o to

credits : so n icpia ygro u n d . g r ; cin em ath eq ue . b s . c a ; cpaw s . o r g ;

m a c m .o r g ; users .g io ba ln et . c o . uk ; c o m ed yw o rk s . c a ; fauntlet. ucalgary .c a

1 8 a&e | 14.9.04 | the m cgill tribune

^ ^ ilrn The tale of a dirty old man Dishin' the dirt on Charles Bukowski E M ILY H A R R IS "/ don't know how many bottles of beer I have consumed while wait­ ing for things to get better" —An excerpt from "Beer" by Charles Bukowski harles Bukowski w as a lew d, crude and dirty old man. His poetry and autobio­ graphical novels delve into the lowest depths of human existence, focusing on sex, alcohol, fighting, prostitution, horse racing and endless other topics that alw a ys linger outside the boundaries of the Am erican dream. He writes about a reality that few acknow ledge, but many live each and every day.

C

Bukowski: Born Into This is an insightful documentary profiling this American literary icon. Researched and directed by John Dullaghan, the film uses interviews and archival footage to reconstruct the ups and downs of Bukowski's life. After suffering through an abusive childhood, decades of poverty, alcoholism and menial jobs— including 14 years at the United States Postal O ffic e —he eventually rose to become an internationally cele­ brated poet, novelist and underground cult icon. The film's main strength is the massive amount of archived interview footage available of Bukowski himself. He passed a w a y before filming began, so the greatest onscreen moments come from the honest answers he gave in interviews throughout his life.

The Bukowski in this film is a sensitive, emotional and caring person w ho just hap­ pens to drink excessively. After seven years of research and severe reverence of his film's subject, Dullaghan has produced an homage rather than a biography, but there is still entertainment and information to be found. The film acts as a great introduction to Bukowski s work by forefronting his poetry and his own interpretations of his writings; fans of his writings will be equally interested to learn more about the man behind the words.

The films genuinely sweet underlying message echoes the perseverance that Bukowski had in his own life: if you have a dream, keep plugging until you make it a reality. Before hitting fam e, Bukowski wrote hundreds of poems every d a y while working at the post office. He received rejection letters from almost everyone, but in the end, his

YENRA.COM A solitary, pensive mom ent with the notoriously crude Charles Bukowski. perseverance paid off. His epitaph says it all: "Don't try; if you're trying, you're not doing."

Bukowski w a s an icon for those growing up in the 19 6 0 s . Interviews with his friends and fans show how influential his writings have been. Artists and musicians such as Tom W aits, Sean Penn, Harry Dean Stanton and even Bono w ere interviewed for the film— they all discuss how the clear, honest writings of a true working class man shaped their perspectives on life and art.

Dullaghan is a true Bukowski fan. His dedication allows the film to be told entirely by its subject, facts uncontested. Bukowski said it himself: "I am alw a ys the hero of mv sh it."*

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the m cgill tribune | 14.9.04 j a&e 19

u sic

REVIEWS CD— Tessie by the Dropkick Murphys

Addison Groove Project rocks Le Swimming

If you're a fan of the Boston Red Sox, you must be pretty disheartened by the fact that they haven't won the W orld Series in about a million years. The Dropkick Murphys sure are, so with Tessie, they're doing their part to get the Sox on a w in­

Boston band brings high energy and busloads of fans

ning track.

Here's some background: w a y back in the early 1 9 0 0 s , the Red Sox won an impressive five W orld Series over the span of 15 years, spurred on by their diehard fan base, the Red Rooters, w ho used to mock the other team by jokingly bellowing the B ro ad w ay hit "Tessie." This becam e a fan tradition - at least until 1 9 1 8 , when the Rooters fell apart and "Tessie" w a s forgotten. Sadly, they haven't won a W orld Series since.

W ith their rousing updated version of the song, the Dropkick Murphys are hoping to change that. They've reworked the lyrics to relate the history of the song, and added rocking guitar, bagpipe-y goodness, and a handful of Red Sox players singing backup, making a track that's born to be yelled at top volume by a stadium full of drunk­

S C O T T SAM EROFF ot only did Addison G roove Project bring their infectious blend of funky, sax-inflected music to Le Swimming last Friday night, but they also brought a caravan of their ded­ icated and fun-loving fans. Dodging border guards and moose, supporters traveled from the likes of Plattsburgh, N e w York, and Burlington, Vermont, a s w ell as the band's hometown of Boston to party the night a w a y. W hen Addison took the stage around 1 1 pm, the floor w a s alread y overflowing and they wasted no time getting everyone moving with their jazzy, funk-induced

N

rhythms.

This unique blend of complex ja z z and dirty funk w as made possible by Addison's creative instrumental line-up, consist­ ing of Dave Adam s on alto sax and vocals; Ben G roppe on tenor sa x; Andrew Keith on drums; Rob M arscher on keyboards, synthesized bass and vo cals; and Brendan M cG in n on vocals,

en fans.

If you're not so big on sports, there's still something for you on this C D . The band sounds like they're having an awesom e time mixing up traditional Irish strains with thick power chords and gravelly-voiceo yell-along vocals. O n "The Burden," a live acoustic track, they take an unexpectedly laid-back break, focusing on a soft, strummed melod'y and vocals reminiscent of Alice in C hains.

If you like the Red Sox, great, but if not, don't let the basebal scare you a w a y from this short but enjoyable listen.

guitar and trumpet.

The band began performing together in their senior year of high school. N o w , after six years of touring, they have gradually carved out a place for themselves in the thriving US Jam-band scene. Their popularity is based not only on their abil­ ity to play hard-driving party music, but also on their tight and cohesive musicianship that seems almost telepathic at times.

Highlights from the opening set included a rocking ver­ sion of the song "Tryptophan" and a blistering drum solo from Keith that ended in a much-deserved beer break for the band.

The second set opened with an unbelievable version of "G roove in G reen" which highlighted the unique abilities of each of the band's musicians. At the height of the songs jam, M arscher launched into a virtuosic solo that featured him tearing up the bass with his left hand, w hile complementing himself on keyboards with his right hand. Marscher's ability to integrate two different instrumental sounds simultaneously w a s incredible.

Everyone in the band w a s noticeably impressed, to the point that they put down their instruments and started dancing their asses off like the audience. This high-octane playing style w a s main-

—Melissa Price

CD— Matchbook Romance/Motion City Soundtrack split EP

They be jammin' at Le Swimming. tained throughout the rest of the set, and culminated with an unexpected cover of Al Green's "Love and Happiness.

Starting out soulful and jazzy, "f°ve and Happiness quick­ ly picked up tempo, eventually maturing into in a fuil-out frenzy of horns and slinky bass lines. This timeless bedroom classic took on a whole new life, as Addison jammed it into a floor-shaking cli­ max that had everyone going nuts. As an encore, the boys played "Talkin Loud," an ode to the age-old rock 'n' roll dilemma of making enough loot to pay the rent. For a little more than the price of a pint, Addison G roove project put on a hell of a show.

So keep an eye out for their next gig in Montreal. ■

^ ^ ilm

W h o a , it's, lik e ... half-clear, dude! This EP offers quite the challenge: it takes seri ous effort to stop staring at the cool-ass album art and actually get the C D into some sort of playing device. Thankfully, this ridiculously difficult task is imminently worth it - the disc doesn't just sit there anc look pretty, it also holds four solid songs from two of Epitaph's shiny new additions.

M atchbook Romance starts the program with the gentle "In Transi (For You)," which begins as a dreamy lullabye, but soon breaks into o crashing clim ax that half-buries singer A ndrew Jo rdans drifting voice.

The second song, "Playing for Keeps," is a bit unremarkable, but the standard mopey lyrics ("Let me take the Wheel and 11! crash this c a r/D o you have to make this so hard?") arb balanced out by inter esting guitar work. Jordan has a decent but sirmewhat generic voice, he can work a poignant line w ell, but these days, thats a dime c dozen.

Justin Pierre of Motion C ity Soundtrack, however, has a voice thahits you like an ice cube down the spine about 2 0 seconds into "W hen 'You're' Around." Sharp, high and nicely airy, it floats alone beside a glowing guitar bit oyer steady backing strums. And just wher you think he's going to crack on the high notes, he throws some throa into it to roughen it up. Add this to the tangles of guitar, bass anc drums, and you've gotoa couple of interesting, complex pieces of

Those glorious Festival days

music.

PAUL G O ER TZEN rom August 2 6 to September 6 , the Montreal W orld Film Festival graced cinemas on and around rue Ste-Catherine with its huge selection of movies from around the world. For $ 3 0 0 , you could have watched every single film, but since most students don't have that kind of cash, here are three highlights.

This W ay Out is a film about three g a y refugees who fled their homelands for fear of violence due to their sexual orien­ tation. Much of the film is a moving conversation among the three whose home countries of Pakistan, Kenya and Brazil are each intolerant of homosexuality. In Pakistan, for example, homosexual­ ity is a crime punishable by up to 1 0 0 lashings or even death by stoning. Those accused of such "crimes" are disowned by their families and shunned by society in general.

The film begins with pictures and videos of beatings, often to the point of death. Their lucid faces and eyes, captured through the camera's lens, create an eerily intimate atmosphere. Its a stark beginning to an otherwise unremarkable documentary; it w a s a sad story without peace. This W ay Out w a s short and simple essentially just three people telling their stories, whose themes inter­ sected with one another.

"I wanted to tell one story through these collective stories," explained director Jill Burnett.

She, along with the film crew, felt lucky to find three people with the histories she w a s looking for who w ere all located in San Francisco, though everyone she interviewed shared similar stories.

It is important to remember that asylum-seekers are not just local­ ized within San Francisco; there are similar refugees all over C a n a d a and the United States, having fled simply out of fear of

F

being themselves.

Witches in Exile is a documentary by Allison Berg about a modern-day Salem witch hunt in G h a n a . In this poor African coun­ try, women live in fear of withcraft accusations, which mainly arise when any unexplainable death or disaster occurs. O nce accused, women are either sentenced to death or banished to a "witch cam p."

The film spends most of its time interviewing four women at

A

—Melissa Price

S>ne of the more brutal witch cam ps— Kukuo, which resembles the N a z i death camps from W orld W a r II. These women struggle at the hands of vicious male aggressors. "|'m struck dumb and I hate men even more," reflected one anonymous view er after watching Witches in Exile.

However, the film aims to show that these exiled women are still strong and in good humour.

"I think the smiles are as important as the tears, Berg said.

O ur final selection, Beat the Drum, snagged a Golden Zenith at the Festival for Best African Film. The film is about M usa (played by the very talented Junior Singo), a nineyear-old boy who lost his poverty-stricken parents to A ID S. Alone, he goes off to Johannesburg to buy his grandmother a new cow , as her old cow had been slaughtered to appease the ancestors of Musa's parents.

Beat the Drum w as produced and written by W . David M cB rayer. Originally, M cBraver had wanted a South African to write for this film, but he coula not find someone with the right cre­ dentials. So M cBraver himself ended up with the job. At a press conference, he explained his motives for making Beat the Drum.

He had been in Johannesburg filming a documentary about AIDS, and couldn't understand w hy the children begging on the streets w ere not affecting him emotionally. He wanted to create a film to bring him closer to the action.

"Really, the film is not that hopeful," he says. "I [mainly] want­ ed to bring M usa closer."

Unfortunately, his lack of passion is reflected in his film, but director Hickson's splendid shots of the city and stunning opening sequence save the production.

All three of these films pull us out of our comfy cultural para­ digms, showing a very different w a y of life. Living in a society where homosexuality is not a crime is something w e often take for granted. W e forget that just centuries ago women in North Am erica w ere also being erroneously killed for allegedly partici­ pating in witchcraft. W e are mortified when someone w e have even heard of contracts AIDS, but in other countries jh ere is no avoiding it. Allison Berg put it best when she said, "I think that there is no w a y to compare their lives to o u rs."*

BOOK— Around the world in poetry: Notes on Leaving by Laisha Rosnau People get to know each other in fragments. W e gradually collect people's stories, memories, and thoughts, fitting them together until there are enough pieces to make up the substance of a per son. In Laisha Rosnau's first collection ol poems, Notes on Leaving, she presents the reader with these pieces and then turns a w a y to let us sort them out on our own.

Notes on Leaving reads like an abstract autobiography. The poems act as vignettes, offering snapshots of the past or scraps of a relationship. W ith sharp, clear imagery, Rosnau describes small bu! crucial details of the scenes: lake w eeds twisting around ankles, stolen cigarettes, tangled sheets that still hold the scent of people who have left. As a w hole, it forms a collage of the moments that make up a life and the people w ho come and go but alw a ys leave some trace behind.

The themes of transit and transition pervade the writing; the poems span cities, countries and decades, from riding bikes through the O kan ag an Valley to hitching a ride through Australia in a sweaty van. Rosnau's recollection drifts through the places she's lived, stop­ ping here and there to give a disordered sense of a life spent search ing around this world to see what it has to offer. Her voice is consis­ tent throughout, however, so the narrative remains strong and never seems disjointed.

(

Notes on Leaving provides a history of enduring images, which when combined leave you with a sense of a night spent sharing mem­ ories and getting to know someone better. Rosnau has a talent for building a complete atmosphere in a few simple but sacred-sounding words. They are definitely worth a read.

—Melissa Price

sports F O O T B A L L - Redmen

17, S h e r b r o o k e 0

Vert & Or leave seeing Red McGill evens record by blanking Sherbrooke in home opener ADAM MYERS A matchup with a second-year team in front of a boisterous home crowd of 3 ,6 1 2 presented the perfect opportunity for the M cG ill Redmen to get back on track.

The Red 'n' W hite dominated from start to finish on their w a y to a 17-0 win over the listless Sherbrooke Vert & O r on Friday, in the first gam e of the 2 0 0 4 Q uebec University Football League sea­ son at Molson Stadium.

The M cG ill defence in particular managed to avenge a 2 6 0 defeat at the hands of Université de Montréal the previous w e e k. The unit agitated Sherbrooke quarterback M arc-André Tougas all night long, and, more impor­ tantly, w a s able to stuff the run after g iy ing up 3 6 6 yards on the ground against the C arabins.

"In the game against Montreal, w e had some injured players and at some points six of the front seven guys were rookies," Head C o ach Chuck M cM ann said. "W e got some guys back this w eek and they executed w ell."

The defence w as indeed impres­ sive in holding the Vert & O r offence to just 6 2 yards rushing, while using plen­ ty of seven and eight man fronts—a change that also led to six sacks.

"W e rearranged a few things on the defensive front and it allowed me a straight run at the Q B ," noted linebacker Dave Richardson, who wrestled the Sherbrooke pivot to the ground four times in the game.

However, the entire Redmen team w a s firing on all cylinders on this day, as the M cG ill offence finally got on the scoreboard this w eek after an embar­ rassing shutout. Q u arterb ack M att Connell led the drive to the first Redmen points of the season, connecting with

THE

veteran w ide receiver Rob LeBlanc on a SS ^ ard pass play early in the second quarter to put M cG ill up 7-0.

Late in the first half, Sherbrooke coach Alain Lapointe took a page out of Bill Belichick's playbook, conceding a safety when his team w as forced to punt out of the end zone rather than giv­ ing M cG ill excellent field position and a chance at scoring before halftime.

This gave the Redmen a 9-0 lead at the break, with Connell finishing 10 for 14 for 1 5 8 yards. The strong pass­ ing attack also helped set up the run­ ning game, a s second-year tailback M ichael Samman gained 10 5 yards before the break on his w a y to a gamehigh 1 6 0 . Samman credited his offen­ sive line and receivers for their consis­ tent pushes and downfield blocking, which created plenty of room for him to run.

Cantin can lead, too W hen M cG ill cam e out to start the second half, backup quarterback Philippe Cantin w a s under centre, a switch that w as planned from the start, according to M cM ann.

"I want all players on the team to have confidence in both quarterbacks," he said.

And the senior from St-Leonard did not disappoint after a great play by the Redmen special teams. Early in the third quarter, Erik G a la s blocked a Sherbrooke punt, giving M cG ill great field position. Cantin then capped the ensuing 2 9 y a rd drive with a seven yard touchdown run, upping the lead to 1 6 0 . A single by Robert Eeuwes round­ ed out the scoring.

Cantin finished the d a y 5 for 8 for 7 7 yards, including a 39-yard strike to last w eek's leading receiver, A lex M artin. M artin, who w a s banged up

during the gam e, finished with 5 8 yards receiving, w hile LeBlanc led the Redmen with 1 0 8 yards on five catch­ es.

However, despite the positive final score and some impressive personal sta­ tistics, not all w a s perfect for the Redmen. The Sherbrooke defence— who deserves credit for preventing the contest from becoming a b lo w o u tforced two Connell turnovers deep in Vert & O r territory. First, defensive back Sébastien Jalbert picked off a Connell

pass at his own 19, and later he crunched the M cG ill pivot with a bone­ jarring hit, knocking the football loose at the fouryard line. M cM ann attributed the turnovers to inexperience at the quar­ terback position, noting that his signal callers w ere tentative and failed to throw the ball with authority and let their receivers make plays for them.

Nonetheless, the story of the night w a s the improved defensive play of a team that has yet to allo w Sherbrooke to win a single point, having outscored the

RED Z ONE

An open letter to UEFA To Serie A , English Premier League, the Bundesliga, and the rest o f Europe's major football leagues: irst of all, congratulations on the success of your respective leagues. You should be commended for re-igniting the pas­ sion for European football. Take the English Premier League, for example. O n ly 2 0 years ag o , the popularity of English football had reached an all-time low, and now it is the healthiest it has ever been. But although your leagues are suc­ cessful, they are certainly not perfect. In the last 15 years only four clubs have taken home the Premier league title. Does this indicate a level playing field?

In contrast, the N ational Football League has crowned 10 champions. The NFL is constantly praised for designing a league that promotes parity. Conversely, your leagues have no semblance of equality.

In recent years the NFL has eclipsed M ajo r League Baseball as America's national pastime. Baseball, Am erica's pride and joy for over a century, began its fall from grace with the strike-shortened 1 9 9 4 season, and has since continued to feel the impact of big bank accounts on the gam e The Yankees spend exorbitant sums to field the best team money

F

Vert & O r 78 -0 in two all-time meetings.

Guillaum e Roy w a s solid as usual for the Redmen, recording nine solo tackles and forcing a fumble, while defensive tackle Kerwin Clarke account­ ed for two sacks.

The win evened the Redmen's record at 1-1, heading into Saturdays tilt with the lowly Bishop's G aiters, who fell last w eek to Sherbrooke in the Vert & Or's first ever C IS w in. Kickoff is at 1:30pm at Molson Stadiu m .*

can buy, w hereas the Royals, Brewers, and orphaned Expos practically pull change from their couches in order to pay their players. The Yankees will be playing in October, and the Expos may be in W ashington by then. And yet, even baseball has seen 10 champions in tne last d ecad e and a half.

Baseball has tried in recent years to level the playing field by sharing revenue among all clubs. European football does noth­ ing of the sort.

Even player movement is dictated entirely by money. In North Am erica, players move between teams via trades, but in Europe you just buy them from the other team. W hen M ichael O w en shifted from Liverpool to Real M adrid, the Spaniards paid eight million pounds for the rights to the rest of his contract. Is it right that all a team needs to do to be suc­ cessful is to write a cheque? Free ag ency is one thing, but the life of a contract doesn't even have meaning in football any­ more.

Look at poor Everton. They had this local lad by the name of W a y n e Rooney, a talented 18-year-old who m ade a big splash at the Euro C up this summer. After that, he becam e the most coveted footballer on the planet, so mighty M anchester United decided to sw oop down and pluck him tor a cool 2 4

dan

M cQ

u il l a n

million pounds. Everton could use the money a lot more than they could use Rooney, so they had no choice but to sell him.

Is that how you w ant your leagues to w ork? H alf the division is simply a farm system for the contenders?

Do you w ant to hear a cra zy idea that just might make for some competitive football? H o w about w e take the top two or three teams from each league and create a European foot­ ball super league? Not just the Cham pions League, but also an actual year-round schedule of matches between the giants of European football. The bottom teams in the super league would be relegated back to their domestic divisions, and the champions of each national league would compete in a tour­ nament— perhaps the Cham pions League—for a berth in the super league the next year.

Imagine the possibilities. Real M adrid playing at O ld Trafford, A C M ilan paying M o naco a visit, Porto taking a trip to see Bayern M unich. Better yet, imagine Crystal Palace, N um ancia, and Empoli playing in matches they actually have a shot at winning. Football's position in Europe is forever secure, like hockey in this country. But just think of how much better it could be if every match w a s truly meaningful.

Signed, A concerned football fan

S O C C E R

the m cgill tribune | 14.9.04 | sports 21

PREVIEW

Still searching for that elusive CIS gold

O F F T H E B E A T E N PA T H

Say w hat?

Injuries could hold Martlets back in quest for national title

Sports jargon decoded at last

MELANIE MACDONALD For the past number of years, the goal for the M cG ill Martlets soccer team has been to w in the Q uebec Student Sport Federation title, and par­ lay that into a triumphant gold medal victo ry at the national cham pi­ onship— an objective the team has fallen short of in 1 3 trips to the tourna­ ment.

And while that is still the aim this season, H ead C o ach M arc Mounicot is not focusing on the C a n a d ia n Interuniversity Sport cham pionship, instead stressing the need for his team to concentrate on the here and now.

This outlook is especially pertinent because the Martlets have suffered through significant injuries, so Mounicot isn’t sure how the team will shape up during the rest of the season.

A n d, ultimately, the health of the squad's players could determine if the Martlets will win it all or fail to even qualify for the finals.

"W e haven't identified any goals yet because w e've had to deal with so many injuries," said Mounicot. "So it's difficult to assess the strengths and the weaknesses of the team.

"Right now, the big goal is [to] try to g e l everyone back on track regarding Ijiealth," he ad d ed . "This is the first team objective. After that, w e can speawdjeout performance."

Nonetheless, one clear positive the Martlets |have going for them is a strong returning cast of 16 veterans, combined with seven talented new­ comers. However, during the pre-season, the group w a s unable to play a single gam e with a full roster, and five potential starters w ere out of the lineup at various times.

This collection of wounded stars included striker Jen W h ite , midfielders Sarah C h an and Toni Pascale, and defenders Shari Fraser and Stephanie G aty, all of whom have been nursing injuries new and old since training cam p began. As w ell, Q uebec all-star N eena G upta will not be returning this season because of a serious knee injury.

A N D R E W SEG A L

Fry: Hey, I'm starting to get the hang o! this game. Theblerns are loaded, the count's three blerns and two anti-blerns, and the infield blern' rule is in effect. Right? ieela: Except for the word 'blern', that was complete gibberish.

-Futurama

Rookies stand out as replace­ ments

But w hile M ounicot obviously doesn't enjoy having veteran starters on the sidelines, he w a s quick to praise the less-experienced players that have done well in the starting role, namely rookies Catherine Scott, N ad in e Plessis, and M orag Mitchell.

M eanw hile, striker C a rly Dejoie, who joined the team late in the pre-season, performed impressively during the O ld Four Tournament and looks promising up front.

Furthermore, Mounicot can take comfort in the fact that All-Canadian Alanna M aloney is coming back to the team after missing all of last sea­ son. The fifth-year forward led the nation in goals in 2 0 0 2 and will bring experience and leadership to the team. Her presence, along with that of returning stars D an ielle D ay and goalie Kristina Rerusco, have allowed Mounicot to claim that this year's team will be strong.

Impressive pre-season

Based on the success this team experienced during the exhibition schedule, it seem s a s though Mounicot's assertion is fairly accurate.

W h ile the individual veterans have

struggled and faced a number of obstacles, the team as a whole has proven to be extremely competitive.

"W e beat two teams [at the O ld Four Tournament] that will contend for the O ntario championship and that are likely to compete at the national cham pionship," Mounicot noted. "I'm very pleased with this because it seems that both the new and old girls are bringing the same intensity to the field. They simply hate to lose."

In the past, this winning mentality has helped drive the M artlets to impressive performances at the nation­ al level. During the 2 0 0 3 cam paign, the women w ere undefeated (1 1-0-3) in the Q uebec conference, before earning a bronze medal at the C IS championship, which M cG ill hosted.

They also allow ed only three goals during the regular season, tied for sec­ ond best in the nation.

It remains to be seen if a positive attitude will be enough to overcome the injury troubles the team has faced to this point, but Mounicot and C o . will find out shortly. The Martlets take the field to kickoff the regular season on Friday at 6 :0 0 p m , when they host the Université du Q uébec à Montréal at Molson Stadium. ■

IM A G E S

am what you probably think of as the typical sports editor. You know the type: nardcore fan, will watch almost any sport, plays in multiple fantasy leagues, and never had even the slightest shot at playing pro hey, if you can't do, report, right?). , I'm also the type who could drop an astounding number of obscure sports terms in a single conversation, and who would correct you if you improperly used a slang expression even slightly.

Contrast me with M iss Ataloss. Think of her as a typical non-jock girl who likes sports but doesn't have a clue about what the announcer is say­ ing. She follows the wins and losses of her favourite team, but why they win or how they do it are beyond her. . , , Basically, I'm Leela and she's Fry, except that I m male and shes female, and I'm not a one-eyed alien. But as far as sports terms go, the ones M iss A . hears and reads in this paper might as well come from the year 3 0 0 0 .

Yet all is not lost for her—she needn't give up on the sports section for the year. For M iss A . had the brilliant idea to ask her sports editor to ensure that her knowledge of football and hockey jargon is, for lack of a non-sports phrase, up to par. The results of this meeting of the minds fol­ low:

Football

W hen presented with the term split end, the subject brilliantly noted, "This isn't a hair thing, right?" Indeed, given the lack of attention many gridiron stars give to their ap pearance, she's quite astute. Really, though, a split end is the player who lines up on the line of scrimmage (where the ball is placed to start play) several yards a w a y from the nearest offen­ sive lineman, he usually runs forward to catch passes. This is the oppo­ site of the tight end, who lines up right next to, or tight with, the offensive linemen, and often blocks. , .

N ext up w a s the uniquely C an ad ian phrase two-and-out. M iss A . believed this w a s some odd w a y of counting people being knocked out and removed from the field. And while this does happen quite frequent­ ly in football, the twoand-out occurs more regularly, especiaHy when the Redmen offence is involved. A two-and-qut,takes place when a team receives the ball and fails to gain the 10 yards necessary for a first down in its two tries—subsequently, it must punt. . , O ur mystified miss next decided to tackle (pun intended) splitting the uprights. She joked it cam e from macho men w ho cut wood back in log­ ging days, before guessing it referred to a tailback running through the other guys. It sounds logical enough, but uprights actually just refers to the goal posts, so splitting the uprights means to kick the ball right through them on a field goal or point after touchdown.

Finally, M iss A . dealt with rolling out of the pocket, which she thought might be a fancy figure skating move, "like a salchow or some­ thing." However, in reality there's nothing dainty about 3 0 0 pound line­ men, so this wasn't such a good guess. Indeed, the pocket is the area between the two farthest-out offensive linemen, known as the tackles, in which the quarterback stands to get maximum protection while preparing to throw. So rolling out of the pocket involves the quarterback taking the ball from the snap, and running to the right or left, so he is no longer standing between his two tackles. From there, he can run for a gain or try to complete a pass.

Hockey Here, M iss A . had a little more experience from her days as a puck bunny, but'that doesn't mean she still didn't harbour any giant misconcep-

YASEMIN EMORY

Rugby Redmen second team hosted Harvard Saturday on lower field.

tl0nS However, it seems much of her in-depth hockey knowledge is derived from those awful flicks, The Mighty Ducks, D2 and possibly D3.

For instance, she assumed a power play w a s like the flying V ; needless to say, it's not—a power play occurs when one team gets a penal­ ty, so the other team has a five-on-four advantage for two minutes or less, depending on if they score. . .

She then proceeded to guess that a hat trick w a s an assisted goal.

Although she w a s wrong, to her credit, she did use proper terminology, which is alw ays a pluss. Actually, a hat trick os when one player scores three goals in a gam e. She also guessed, albeit after some prompting and clues, that a Gordie Howe hat trick w a s three fights. She turned out to be pretty close—a G o rdie How e hat trick is a goal, an assist and a fight, all in the same gam e. Look for Jarome Iginla to notch one of these from time to time. .

W hen our mystified mistress w a s asked what a one-timer is, ^she clearly had ideas other than hockey on her mind when she replied "The guy who only.scores o nce—ever." E rr... right. A one-timer is a quick shot immediately after receiving a pass, all in one motion.

Mistakes aside, M iss Ataloss w as at least willing to learn what all the sports slang meant—a crucial step to^completing the boyfriend-pleas­ ing indoctrination course. And, she didn't once maxe the cardinal sin of saying the losing team's score first. However, more challenges lie ahead, as basketball and rugby lingo she's even less likely to comprehend aw aits her next w eek. Until then, lets just hope she doesn t pull a Fry and ëmbarrass herself too much. ■

22

sports | 14.9.04 | the m cgill tribune

T W O - P O I N T

C O N V E R S I O N

Kobe and Beckham 's guide to fine dining M O H IT A R O R A The setting: A window-side table for four with a picturesque view, candlelight, and place settings for two elite athletes and their lovely companions.

Enter basketball superstar Kobe Bryant and his wife, Vanessa.

Kobe: Baby, please, your ring looks finel Put a w a y the W index!

Vanessa: O kay, okay, fine. {G ives ring one last rub with chamois.)

Enter English football captain David Beckham and his wife, Victoria, a.k.a. Posh Spice David: Sorry for the delay, mates. You know how women are. Their hair has to be right and all.

Victoria: Ah yes, and your pink-dyed mohawk just screams low maintenance, does it?

Kobe: Uhh... no worries, w e're all here now.

David: So, how w a s the summer? G o anywhere for holidays?

Kobe: Actudfly, I'm still kinda messed up from my vacation last sumrger. I w a s at a resort in C o lo rado , and let's just say I had problems with

one of the staff members. (Vanessa glares unsym­ pathetically at Kobe.)

David: G o o d help is hard to find. I only recently had some trouble with my personal assistant.

Victoria: Actually, it sounded like you had a fine time with M s. Loose, hun.

David: It's Loos, Vic. Her name is Loos.

Victoria: I w asn't talking about her name, David.

Kobe: So David, I heard you went to Portugal this summer.

David: Yes, I w a s there making a bid for a very special cup, but alas, my time there w a s cut short.

Kobe: I know the feeling. I w a s seeking my own holy grail in Detroit, but some bald-headed P. Diddy look-a-like named C haun cey ended up tak­ ing it from me.

Victoria: Vanessa, let's go powder our noses.

M ayb e you can tell me more about that lovely pur­ ple diamond you have. (Kobe starts to sw eat.)

The ladies excuse themselves.

Kobe: Those women and 'powdering their noses'.

David: I know! Vic a lw a ys seems to have white powder on her nose. W h a t kind of weird make­ up is that?

Kobe: W e ll, you know w hat they say. W om en — you can't live with them ... pass the beer nuts.

D avid : Ha h a, right-o old chap !

Kobe: N o , seriously, pass the beer nuts. I'm starve ing.

David moves to slide the bowl over to Kobe, but instead sails it well over his head, just as the ladies arrive.

Vanessa: O h , my G o d !

Victoria: Bloody hell, David? W h a t are you play­ ing at?

David: The ball, er, bowl moved! I sw ear! I'm nor­ mally perfectly accurate! The bowl moved at the last second! That's w h y I sent it high!

Kobe: Ladies, it's okay. I understand, David.

Passing is a lw a ys a bad idea. I should have just grabbed the bowl myself and held onto it all night.

A s Vanessa sits, she begins to riffle through her purse. Suddenly, David's cell phone rings.

David: O h , excuse me. I've gotten a text mes­ sage: "D a v id ... If you want a goal you can score on anytime, call m e ... Vanessa"

Victoria pretends not to see the message, but curs­ es silently.

Victoria: Vanessa, what is it you do, exactly?

Vanessa: W ell, I don't work, but I have many hob­ bies. I'm fascinated with history. Did you know C a lifo rn ia is fam ous for gold-digging?

D avid : O h y e s, you mean m ining, right?

Vanessa: Sure, that too.

MSN.ESPN.GO.COM

The waiter arrives to take their orders.

Vanessa: W o w , look at this! The lobster costs twice as much as everything else. Hmm, I'll have the lobster and a Beck's, please. (W inks at David.)

Victoria: O h, I'll tell you what I want, what I real­ ly, really want. C a n I get some kobe beef? (W inks at Kobe.)

Kobe: I'd really like a nice rack right about now.

W aiter: Rack of lamb, sir?

Kobe: Lamb? Sure, I'll have some of that, too.

David: I'll have the goat. (English football fans everywhere nod their ap p ro val.)__

Minutes later, the food arrives. Oh, what it must be like to be rich. ^ K o b e: So how's M ad rid these d a ys?

David: O h , it's excellent. It's so much easier to. do my job now that I have competent people around me. I can't stand the thogght of being a one-man show. H ow about you? I hear you're staying in Los Angeles?

Kobe: Yeah, I'm pumped. It's so much easier to do my job now that I'm a one-man show. I can't stand the thought of having competent people around me.

Vanessa: Yes, you see, Kobe believes that he can play without a certain seven-foot beast on his side.

(Rolls eyes.)

Victoria: I guess you could sa y L.A. is where two becom e one!

Uncomfortable silence falls over the table.

Everyone quietly finishes their meals Kobe: W ell, I'm satisfied.

Vanessa: O h , you got yours, did you?

David: Er, how did you like your meal, Vic? Victoria: Kobe beef can spice up your life!

David: Anyone for dessert? C o ffee?

Victoria: (Singing quietly, while searching for Kobe's foot with her own) If you w anna be my lo ver...

Kobe: (Startled) Actually, w e have to be up early tomorrow. I'll Settle the bill at the front. Thanks for a great evening, guys. C'm on Vanessa.

Victoria: O h no, don't leave just yet!

Kobe: N o , sorry, w e have an early start tomor­ row. Goodnight guys.

Vanessa: (whispering) W h ere do w e have to be?

Kobe: (whispering) Just play along and I'll buy you another ring.

Vanessa: O h yes, w e have a long d a y ahead of us. Goodnight, David. You too, uhh, Vic. O n the w ay out the door, Kobe gets a text mes­

sage on his cell phone.

"K o b e ...If you're looking for someone to dunk on, call m e ... David." ■

MSN.ESPN.GO.COM

S O C C E R

sports Looking for something to do with all your new-found NHL lockout-induced free time?

PREVIEW

Nationals quest begins and ends a t hom e

W rite for sports. W e feel your pain.

JO S E P H G I L C O F F

sports@tribune.mcgill.ca Com e to our first meeting, M onday at 5 :3 0 in Gerts.

As if losing several key players, learning a new defence, and playing in a tough division weren't enough challeng es for the M c G ill soccer Redmen to face at the start of the regu­ lar season, the team must now cope with a personal tragedy and the injury resulting from it.

Star recruit and recent M cG ill ath­ lete of the w eek Jam ie Scholefield w as involved in a car accident that took the life of his 56year-old father, John, and left Jam ie in the hospital, with his imme­ diate soccer future in question. The team must now deal with the horrible incident and avoid becoming disheart­ ened.

Last season M cG ill compiled a 76-1 record and only missed the playoffs by means of a tiebreaker with Laval, against whom the Redmen had a los­ ing head-to-head record. The team is looking to improve on that record and represent the school as division champi­ on rather than a s host when the nation­ al championship takes place at M cG ill this year. Defender Kyle G raham clear­ ly stated the Redmen s lofty goals.

"It would be tough to host nation­ als without a playoff berth," he said.

"W e have talent enough to w in nation­ als."

To reach such heights, M cG ill will have to account for the void left in goal with the graduation of Dustin

Diedricksen and a defence that has struggled in the team's pre-season matches. Jose Luis Valdez takes over as starting goalkeeper, but lacks the expe­ rience and poise of D iedricksen.

C o ach Adam M a r admitted that goal­ tending is a concern for the Redmen, but is confident in the third7 ear keeper.

"The key is getting more league play experience," he asserted. "Jose will improve as this experience comes."

Though the defence is experi­ enced, it has so far been exposed in exhibition play against top opponents like Yale and Brown. M ar has instituted a zone-like flat-4 alignment in the hopes that it will tighten up the defence, as well as jump-start the offence with a better transition into attack. The defen­ sive unit isn't short on individual talent, led by co-captains G raham and JeanPaul Desjardins and strengthened by the return of standout Derek Tsang after a one-year absence.

Desjardins has been quick to deflect blame from the new defensive scheme for some soft goals allow ed by M cG ill in the pre-season. Some have been off goalkeeper mistakes and oth­ ers w ere just from rust, he explained.

"W e just need to keep on playing and get back in the groove," he said.

W ith the defence still working out some kinks, the offence has to pick up the slack. "This year's team will be a new look for M c G ill," said M ar. "W e will rely on the offence a lot more than

in seasons past."

However, the Redmen were count­ ing on Scholefield to be a major piece in this revitalized offence. He shone in a tough loss to W estern in the gold medal match of the pre-season O ld Four soccer tournament netting the team's only goal as well as potting one of M cG ill's successful penalty kick attempts in the tiebreaker shootout that the Redmen lost 4-3. W h ile he is expected to make a full recovery, his ability to come back emotionally will be a major factor in whether the Redmen can compete in a division packed with talent and led by power­ house Université de Montréal.

If the team does succeed, it will be largely because of its mental tough­ ness and cohesion. M a r listed the team's most remarkable strengths as its chemistry and "never-say-die attitude."

However, this spirit can only take the Redmen so far. The real question is whether the M cG ill squad has the skill to match up with its opponents, and Desjardins believes that they do.

"This is one of the most talented teams w e've had in a w hile," he said.

"O n ce w e get our cohesion down and get things sorted out, things will be fine."

The Redmen hope that the year ends with the joy of victory to erase the bitter struggles they have so far encoun­ tered, on and off the field. ■

QUEBEC

FOOTBALL

TEAM

L

w

the m cgill tribune | 14.9.04 | sports 2 3

STANDINGS T

OTL

BO X SCO RE

PTS

PF

PF

Montreal

2

0

0

0

4 4

50

4

Laval

2

0

0

0

32

5

4

M cG ill

1

1

0

0

17

26

2

Sherbrooke

1

1

0

0

21

34

2

Concordia

0

2

0 ■

0

20

35

0

Bishop's

0

2

0

0

17

36

0

ROUND

Redmen soccer player injured in fatal car accident M cG ill soccer recruit James Scholefield w as hospitalized early W ednesday morning due to injuries suffered in a car accident that took the life of his 5Ô7ear-old father, John. The- accident occurred just after 1:0 0am near the Scholefield family home in Senneville. The younger Scholefield, last week's M cG ill male athlete of the week, w as released from hospital late last week after suffering a lacerated spleen, but is expected to make a full recovery.

SHERBROOKE 0 at McGILL 17 First Quarter (no scoring)

M

INTRAM URAL C O R N ER

Second Quarter KICKOFF

Bad M am m a Jammas ink star goalie

jm

The B ad M am m a Jammas caused rip pies in the men's hockey D division (a .k .a . the DHL] on W ed n esd ay night when they signed star free agent goalie Matt Lyman, who doubles a s executive producer of TV M cG ill, to a o neyear contract.

"W e're really happy with the signing The DHL has gotten really lough in the last few years, so w e needed a goalie who can do the little things, like stop the puck, or even stay on his skates," said BMJ c a p tain and general m anager Mohit Arora

i p

Upcoming G am es Flag football-Division A Up the G ut @ 4thandlongs Sun, Sept 19, 1 :1 5pm Pack of Thieves @ Competitors Sun, Sept 19, 2:15 p m

THE H OR N

W EEKEN D

F O O TB A L L

TRIVIA

C

ft 1. W ho is the only NFL player to rush for 1 ,0 0 0 yards in each of his first 10 seasons?

Third Quarter

2. W hich is the only publicly owned team in the NFL?

M c G —TD P. Cantin 7 run (PAT R. Eeuwes) 2 :4 7

3. W hat Stanford grad ranks second all-time in passing yards?

4 . W h o caught the pass known as the "Immaculate Reception"?

5 . W h o coached the 1 9 7 2 M iami Dolphins to the only undefeated season in NFL history?

—submitted by Jonathan Klein

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Rugby Martlets extend streak to 43 games

M cG ILL—TD R. LeBlanc 3 5 pass from M . Connell (PAT R. Eeuwes) 4 :2 1 M cG ILL—SA FETY (conceded in end zone by A. Chouinard) 1 3 :5 1

o o u d j

M cG ill thumped Sherbrooke 6 0 -0 and Concordia 43 -0 at a Q uebec university women's rugby tournament at M cEwen Field in St-Anne-deBellevue on Sunday, extending their seven year undefeated streak to 4 3 games.

Tess Kelley led the w a y with 3 3 points in the two games on five tries and four conversions.

Julianne Zussman added three tries and five con­ verts, and Laura Belvedere had four tries of her own.

Also chipping in with single tries were Alia Palmer, Valerie Evans, Marie-Josée Blais, and Theresa

Fourth Quarter

Casey.

M c G —S IN G LE 4 5 punt by R. Eeuwes 1 0 :0 3

Rugby Redmen start season with shutout victory

S C O R IN G

BY Q U A R TE R S

M cGill's men took to the pitch for its 124th sea­ son of rugby and got off on the right foot, blanking Sherbrooke 54-0 on Sunday.

M ark Innatowycz paced the Redmen, tallying 1 3 points on two tries and a drop kick goal. Eric Van Sickle and Guillaume Tremblay scored two tries apiece, and Matt Rubin, M ark Bungarten and Chris Knutson added single tries. M ark Eidinger rounded out the scoring with three converts.

Sherbrooke: 0 -0 -0 0 - 0 M cG ill: 0 9 - 8 - 0 - 17 Attendance: 3 ,6 1 2

Redbirds take mercy on John Abbott

REDM EN S O C C E R - Laval @ M cG ill, Tues. Sept. 14, 8pm Molson Stadium The home opener for this year's C IS national championship hosts against the team that edged them for last year's final playoff spot.

There will be a moment of silence before the game and both teams will w e a r black arm bands in memory of the father of M cG ill player Jam ie Scholefield.

The 2 0 0 3 national bronze medalists don't have an automatic berth in the championship this year, and their quest to qualify by winning

§|

the Q S S F begins tonight.

H O C K E Y - W orld C u p , Finland vs. C a n a d a , Tues. Sept. 14, 7pm on C B C The surprising Finns take on the C an ad ian s in w hat will likely be the last game with N HL players for a long time.

FO OTBALL - Bishop's @ M c G ill, Sat. Sept. 18 , 1:30 p m Molson Stadium The Redmen try to get above .5 0 0 for the first time since the end of the 2 0 0 2 season.

REDM EN R U G BY - ETS @ M cG ill, W e d . Sept. 15 , 9pm Forbes Field The home opener for a team on a mission to regain the Q S S F crown, taken from them last year by Bishop's.

G O LF - Ryder C u p , Fri. Sept. 17 thru Sun. Sept. 19 , on TSN The Europeans are going for their fourth C up in their past five tries as they visit M ichigan's O akland Hills Country Club.

MLB - Boston @ N Y Yankees, Sat. Sept. 1 8 , 1 :15pm on FOX Baseball's best rivalry heats up as the teams battle for top spot in the AL East.

MARTLETS S O C C E R - U Q À M @ M cG ill, Fri. Sept. 17, 6pm Molson

NFL - Minnesota @ Philadelphia, M on. Sept. 2 0 , 9pm on A B C Two powerhouses clash in a potential preview of the N F C

Stadium

Cham pionship.

Q U IC K HITS Q: Now that men's rugby has II been given varsity status at McGill, how do you expect the team will III benefit?

A : It means that w e can hope to get funding from M cG ill Athletics, which will go a long w a y . Also, w e are working on a long-term plan that will allo w us to play gam es at Molson Stadium, as soon as this year.

have a first team, second team, and an under-21 squad. The U-21s espe­ cially benefit from this separation, as they play in the C E G E P league, so they get to face equal opposition but practice with the more senior M cG ill teams whenever possible.

A : The outlook for this year's

I

good things will happen. ■ A : W e can do both by splitting the club into three different teams. W e

Ex-Redmen gridiron stars suit up in CFL action A pair of former M cG ill football standouts took to the field in CFL action this past w eek. Samir Chahine, a seven-year CFL veteran, w a s signed by the injury depleted O ttawa Renegades in time to start at offensive guard on Saturday against the BC Lions. There w as only so much help that Chahine could provide, though, as the Renegades dropped a 31-13 decision to the Western division-leading Lions.

O n Sunday, ex-Redmen star John M acdonald w as activated from the Hamilton Tiger-Cats practice roster and stepped back onto his former home field as the Ti-Cats faced off against the CFL powerhouse Montreal Alouettes at Molson Stadium. Montreal w as too much for Hamilton to handle in a decisive 47 -1 8 win, but M acdonald did what he could to limit the dam age, recording a solo tackle in the loss.

Kelley, Richardson gamer athlete of the week honours

Q: What can McGill fans expect to see from the Redmen this year?

Q: The rugby Redmen encour­ team is very good. W e went unde­ feated last year until the final, which age athletes new to rugby to try out w e lost. This year w e hope to finish every season. How are you able to what w e started and get the title that develop talent from scratch yet put escaped us. W ith an y luck, we'll be out a team that competes for the playing in the stadium this year, and Quebec crown every year?

M cG ill's bats cam e alive against John Abbott College, pounding out a 15-1 win on W ednesday.

After five innings, the mercy rule cam e into effect and the game concluded. The mercy rule ends the game when one team has at least a 10-run lead after five innings or later.

The Redbirds had 12 hits, while limiting the Islanders to four. Catcher Zach Schwartz wielded the hottest bat, going 3-for-4 with a pair of doubles, two RBI, and scoring twice. Rightfielder Jonas Pruppas and leftfielder Brandon Dubreuil w ere each 2-for-2 with a run knocked in and three runs, and shortstop John Com eau added two hits.

Starting pitcher Paul O 'Connor threw four strong innings, allowing four hits while striking out seven and walking just one in picking up the w in, which improved the Redbirds' record to 4-1. Simon Ayotte relieved O 'Connor in the fifth inning and struck out two batters.

IWONA LINK

Chris Knutson ♦ Vancouver, BC ♦ U3 Bio-Chemistry ♦ Redmen rugby

Tess Kelley of Beaconsfield, and Dave Richardson of Thornhill, O nt., w ere named M cGill's athletes of the w eek for the period ending Sunday.

Kelley, a 20year-old winger for the Martlet rugby team, totaled 3 3 points in two games this weekend. Kelley scored two tries and two conver­ sions in a 6 0 0 defeat of Sherbrooke, and tallied three more tries and two converts in a 43 -0 win over Concordia.

Richardson, a linebacker on the Redmen foot­ ball team, w a s an unstoppable force in Friday night's win over Sherbrooke at Molson Stadium. Richardson disrupted the Vert & O r offence with six solo tackles, one assist, and four quarterback sacks. Richardson's four sacks were one short of the Q uebec conference single game record.

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September 17