Volume 22 Issue 8: Discovery

MARS’ H I L L

DISCOVERY VO LUM E 22

ISSUE 8

F EB . 7/ 18

FROM THE EDITOR

MARS’ H I L L MARS’ HILL Mars’ Hill is a student publication of Trinity Western University, floated with funds raised by the Student Association. Mars’ Hill seeks to be a professional and relevant student publication, reflecting and challenging the TWU community, while intentionally addressing local, national and international issues.

MISSION TO MARS The mission of Mars’ Hill, as the official student newspaper of Trinity Western University, is to inform and entertain its readers, cultivate awareness of issues concerning the TWU community and provide a forum for purposeful, constructive discussion among its members in accordance with the Community Covenant, Statement of Faith, and Core Values of the University.

EDITORIAL POLICY Mars’ Hill encourages submissions and letters to the Editor. Mars’ Hill reserves the right to edit submissions for style, brevity and compatibility with the Mission, Statement of Faith, the Community Community Covenant, and the Core Values of the University.

Anonymous authorship of any material may be granted at the discretion of the Editor-in-Chief.

Opinions expressed in Mars’ Hill belong to the individual authors and do not necessarily reflect those of the editorial board, Trinity Western University, its officials or its Student Association.

CONTRIBUTORS Garth Lester Kelsey Morris Jesse Mara Nathan Stein Hannah Ahrendt Abby Pernsteiner Sarah Looby Emma Dykstra Charlotte Elson Tori Ahrendt Madison Powers Robbie Carlson Danica Steenkamp Andrew Richmond Joe Red

I first got satellite television when I was 13.

Before that, we had channels two (local news), five (national news) and 21 (national news in French).

Then came channel 1520. The Discovery Channel. Thus began the summer after grade seven filled with Mythbusters, How It’s Made, and of course, Shark Week. My preteen self was also oddly obsessed with Deadliest Catch and Cash Cab, with pirate-esque crab hunters and a trivia-driven taxi. I would get home from track and field practice at night, grab some popcorn and race downstairs to watch the latest show. Sometimes, I would flip to its sister station, TLC, and watch Little People, Big World or dream about some dress in Say Yes to the Dress.

Discovery was life.

What was it about these shows that kept me watching? I don’t doubt curiosity and boredom were two factors (and the pure treat of having a brand new television) that played into my devotion. Beyond that, it was the notion that this channel was feeding me something I had never known before. I mean, that’s what a TV is supposed to do, right?

It was the fact that, after the ever obvious desire to promote science, technology, mechanics and history, I was left walking away with a nugget of information that I could then share.

7600 Glover Rd, Langley, BC, V2Y 1Y1 604-513-2109

I had, in fact, “discovered”. Good work, channel 1520, you succeeded.

I unearthed facts about the way tennis rackets were made, and in my 13-year-old mind, I was smarter for it. I learned that crabbers sleep atrocious hours and that the best time of year to catch Alaskan king crab is during the start of fall and mid-winter. These nearly-useless facts were never truly put to the test, but they made me feel like I had a sort of unexpected secret weapon. I had an ability, some undeveloped sense of science facts.

Now, as a media and communication major, I laugh a bit when I think of this, but nonetheless it was an adoption of these facts that I was being convinced of. After watching one of these shows, I would also deliver the learned facts to my family periodically and sporadically throughout the week. I was sold out for the show.

While self discovery is a topic on its own, it deserves some merit in this conversation of the intake of knowledge. Radical transformation in self discovery comes when you learn a new way of doing something. You’ve discovered, you’ve stripped yourself of everything that you knew before, and you adopt a complete view of something. In other words, you’re sold out.

beneficial and positive information, but discovering and living into something in our lives is a very different thing. This comes in the form of believing facts that are not true, things that the enemy feeds us that are not of Christ. We believe these lies and walk in less-than-sold out days. I’m a culprit of it more than I’d like to admit.

I get into a groove of living a life that lacks everything that God designed it to be, and my less-than-sold-out life starts to feel good. It starts to be my regular, and it isn’t until I realize the lies I’ve believed that my regular is now less-than-sold-out. My discovery quickly turned tolerable, and my hunger suppressed with the idea that I’m not out to learn how to grow with Him anyways, which is a complete and total lie. He is asking us to discover Him, His goodness, His creation, and not simply to go along with it, but to discover what it looks like around us and for us and through us. My discovery is not meant to be the same as yours.

In that sense, are you sold out to what you’ve discovered? And, is what you’ve discovered good?

Until next time, Katie

Watching the Discovery Channel never hurt and it was almost always

marshill@gmail.com www.marshill.ca

STUDENT MEDIA ADVISOR Loranne Brown

This issue brought to you by Norma, Tori’s fave library Brooke’s calming uke song, played by Tori No flying f**** given Alex making baby noises

THE TEAM

ALEX GUST

Managing Editor

BROOKE PATTYN Layout Editor

TORI AHRENDT Visual Editor

JAMISON DERKSEN Sports Editor

NIKI MARA

Academy Editor

JOEL REDEKOP

Arts & Culture Editor

SABINE HENDERSON MAYA JUSMAN Humour Editor

Illustration Editor

HANNAH DEVRIES Chief Copy Editor

MADISON POWERS Photo Editor

What is your deepest, darkest secret?

BAILEY MARTENS Web Editor

DAYNA SLUSAR

Social Media Manager

CHRISALEEN CIRO News Editor

RYAN SCHAFFRICK Advertising and Finance Manager

DE-CLASSIFIEDS

Note to self: two people getting to know each other is bonding, not bondage. Never making that mistake again.

If I was a wizard I would go to an aquarium and say “ACCIO FISH” and watch chaos ensue “Squeeee!!! #socute #porgnation” -Kevin Schut’s Policy on Porgs, MCOM 111 The Gust Siblings.

It’s clear that one scored all the looks (Hint: it’s not Alex - sorry bud) – My mom says I’m handsome. – Alex Hey Abi Mattam, why are you SO cute?

PSA If you are one of those people who spends ten minutes editing your papers at the TWUSA printing computers, I don’t like you How long am I supposed to be cooking these tide pods? https://tinyurl.com/2fcpre6 Leg so hot, hot hot leg, leg so hot you fry an egg.

To the guy who keeps airdropping memes to my laptop in class: Can we be friends?

Apparently this first year class is the loudest incoming class yet. Can confirm ALL Fraser apartments!

This paper is terrible lol

Becca and Alex for cutest couple

ATTENTION: I need a list of Trinity stereotypes for something I’m working on!

Please submit any and all Trinity stereotypes you know of to 778-961-0652

*prof is taking attendance* Me: well wrap me in wrapping paper and put a bow on my head because I am PRESENT Prof: ...

Class: ...

Why are the Declassifieds still the called the Declassifieds? Classified ads have lost or almost lost all their cultural relevance, I advocate for the change to “TWUtter”, since this is what the section reads like. -L Why does Cam Thiessen still write articles for the newspaper What does twusa even do?

Come see Mr.Big. Nyssa looks hot Korean Sam is funny. You should get to know him.

I think the gov is just concerned about Christians being prejudiced against gay ppl. We are told that being gay is wrong. How can it not make us prejudiced and discriminative against gay ppl?

Sometimes I am so tempted to call professors by their first name Linda the cafeteria lady is the nicest lady I’ve ever met.

There is nothing wrong about having mental illness. It’s okay to be sick. It’s not our fault.

Jenna Vanderpol is the best I cleaned my toilet with coke and it worked better than any other toilet bowl cleaners.

It’s crazy how people look so much older after winter breaks “I wonder what Socrates would think about Townsend evaluating... σοφία” :) Clarke

COMMUNITY CORNER

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Mars’ Hill editors reserve the right to edit or reject submissions based on content and/or length. A printed submission does not necessarily reflect an endorsement of any kind, nor does it necessarily reflect the opinions of Mars’ Hill staff, the student association, or that of the University. In fact, probably not.

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Kenny is a 9/10, would date.

Why is Daniel Agüero not in the Himnal?

3

Correction from Issue 7: In The Bitcoin Divide, full versions of the articles can be found in the paper, and a brief description of Bitcoin by Declan White can be found online at marshill.ca

In this issue ...

#ffraser #fskidmore will there be a new coach movie this year? #zachfriesen my declassified has gotten into the paper for 7 issues in a row this does wonders for my self-esteem Sleeping through class costs me about 90 cents a minute, and about $82 a class. Expensive nap. #ididthemath #countsheepnotmoney WANTED: a partner in matchmaking who will romp with me through the back forty on Valentine’s Day chucking rose petals at couples. <3 “A brooch is like a brioche like a bun, yknow, a brioche brooch, bro.” -Spartans, on brooches.

To the person who bragged about watching Phineas and Ferb: You said you watched “all 229 episodes”. What about the full-length movie, Phineas and Ferb: Across the 2nd Dimension?Or the Avengers tie in special?

You sprout lies, fellow cartoon enthusiast. Lieeessss.

When someone writes an article about Trump that doesn’t bash him and you want to cry at its beauty because you thought every Trinity person hated your president but then it is declared irrelevent by everyone you know just because it supports Trump, unwittingly supporting the writer’s point that liberals don’t listen to any opinion but their own. (run on sentence) What do you do then?

You write a declassified!

“Erin Turko left the group” – Erin Turko

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10 14 15

WHEN THE HEADLINES FORGET: THE FENTANYL CRISIS News DISCOVERY II Feature ONE WAY FLIGHT Arts & Culture IT’S A PASSION PROJECT AND A PROFESSION Areopagitica

4 IT'S NEVER AS EASY AS 123

NEWS CHRISALEEN CIRO chrisaleen.ciro@gmail.com

ANONYMOUS “Sexual Orientation and Gender Identity 123” or “SOGI” is a program that was created in response to the changes in the BC Human Rights Code, which prohibits discrimination against individuals regardless of sexual orientation or position on the gender spectrum. The program will be implemented in schools from kindergarten to grade nine, and will centre around inclusivity, respect, and representation for LGBQT+ peoples.

The purpose of the program is to alleviate fear and advocate for sexual and gender minorities in an effort to mitigate the stigma surrounding members of the LGBTQ+ community, as well as to decrease bullying in BC schools. The program provides education on topics of health, identity, and positive relationships.

While most accept the overall themes of the program—the focus on respect and love of all students—the content itself is vehemently contested.

Many parents have a deep concern about the program, believing that their children are being exposed to material entirely inappropriate to their level of maturity. In order to more fully under-

GARTH LESTER Recently, our campus celebrated Missions Week, which included themed chapel messages and an exhibition of various missions organizations. Missions Week brought to mind my experience, almost a year ago, when I served as a team member of the Vancouver: Hope trip with Global Projects during the 2017 spring reading break. During that time, the fentanyl crisis was still a “hot topic” and still making occasional headlines.

On my trip to the Downtown Eastside (DTES), we met with numerous organizations united in serving the community that faced daily challenges that few of us could even imagine. In our dialogue with these organizations and the people who lived in the DTES, it was clear that the fentanyl crisis was more than a

stand the controversy, it is helpful to take a closer look at the specifics of the program, and what it looks like within the classroom.

In a nutshell, the program discusses physical development, health, identity formation, and relationship management with topics that range from anti-bullying, sexual orientation, gender spectrum, and sexual decision making.

More specifically, kindergarten and grade one students will learn about how families differ, why bullying is unacceptable, and the proper anatomical terms for private parts. Second grade students will continue to develop communication skills, demonstrate respectful behaviours, and consider diverse perspectives by learning about body image, self-esteem, cultural heritage, and family.

Higher level students will dive further into the psychology of the issue. For instance, grade four and five students will study the physical and emotional changes that occur during puberty, as well as social changes—how their feelings, relationships, and even sexual preferences might change throughout puberty. Lastly, eighth and ninth grade students will focus on issues of identity, relationships, the implications of bully-

headline; it was a hellish reality defined by terror and desperation. That week opened my eyes to the brutal world in which so many live, but I am sorry to say that—as so many of us do after being exposed to the tragic realities—I forgot.

I forgot about the organizations working tirelessly to fight a seemingly insurmountable battle; I forgot about the promises that I made to myself to do more; but most regretfully, I forgot about the dynamic community that could teach even Trinity about their favourite buzzword. For those of you who do not know the situation too well or, like me, forgot, here are some facts for context.

According to the BC Coroners Service, from 2002 to 2016 there were 973 recorded fentanyl related deaths. From January to October 2017 alone there were 999; Fraser Health (the area in

ing and discrimination, sexual decision making, STDs, and different relationships.

Parents assert that these sexual concepts are irrelevant and inappropriate, and that introducing them into the classroom will lead to immature behaviour and confusion. Many teachers and educators respond in defense of SOGI by arguing that media increasingly exposes and “educates” children on these same issues.

Furthermore, others contest the program, which strives for diversity, for imposing one particular way to think about such issues with little room for differing perspectives. Many argue the curriculum itself demonstrates that there are many ways to consider these issues, which schools should honour before they dismiss parent’s complaints as biased or hateful.

Additionally, while parental disagreements with the above classroom practices range from calling it necessary to grotesquely indoctrinating, some educators are rejecting the curriculum on entirely different grounds.

While there is indeed support for anti-bullying strategies and the respect and protection of LGBTQ+ students,

which Trinity is located), reported 324 of these. Fentanyl is a pain medication that is about 50 to 100 times more powerful than heroin, which is substituted in narcotics for cost efficiency because less volume is needed, but it is far easier to overdose on and get fentanyl poisoning as a result.

Despite their differences, all of the organizations my team met with on our DTES trip said this: the primary reason that individuals use heroin is because they had all been exposed to significant trauma and heroin is an effective pain medication. This means that the fentanyl crisis is killing people in our literal neighbourhood who are living lives defined by trauma, so that someone can make a larger profit.

And yet, no one is talking about it anymore.

“im vegan” – Nate Kara

there are many that argue that SOGI is not diverse enough. Some educators contend that while advocating for acceptance and diversity of sexualities and gender identities are necessary, SOGI has inadvertently constrained such topics in finite descriptions that do not encompass room for the individuality of student nature.

Furthermore, some educators argue that the primary focus on the diversity of LGBTQ+ is, in itself, very narrow. There are many marginalized people in Canada who continue to live without adequate representation in education and continue to fight for individual rights and respect. While SOGI’s emphasis on respect and tolerance is something needed based on extreme reactions to the program, the content itself is limited when considering Canada’s true diversity.

Therefore, many educators and parents have begun to argue for space in the curriculum for each teacher to acknowledge and emphasize the diversity found among their students. In order to reconcile these two seemingly conflicting goals - respecting diversity and acknowledging the developmental state of students - teachers and parents need to collaborate to adapt SOGI to their particular classroom.

We forget. I recognize the incredible work of our ministry volunteers like Streetlight and Night Shift, but still the voices of those experiencing the injustice go unheard.

I’m not claiming that other issues are less relevant, and I’m certainly not claiming to know how to solve the problem, in fact I mostly just have questions.

What would happen if we didn’t only pay attention to the trending stories on social media? What would happen if we weren’t reliant on news stations to care about injustices? And what if, as critically-thinking academics, we were interested in actively researching and supporting solutions to real problems in the real world in order to love our neighbour, truly, as ourselves?

EMBRACING DIVERSITY: NO SUCH THING AS A ONE TRAC MIND CHRISALEEN CIRO On Friday, February 2nd, the Trinity Refugee Awareness Campaign celebrated one year since its official launch. From the very beginning, the organization, under Jordan Koslowsky’s leadership, had an ambitious goal: to mobilize the Trinity community to make a difference in the lives of refugees. TRAC’s clean and professional aesthetic takes over the campus every “TRAC Tuesday,” as students are invited to participate either by purchasing or proudly displaying their merchandise. It is hard to believe that an institution which exerts such a defining influence over Trinity culture has only been around for a year.

Jordan’s initiative seems to be a testament to the experiences and training provided by the Global Projects program. His trip to Israel and Palestine brought him very close to the crisis, and inspired him to leverage his position and citizenship in the West to serve others.

TRAC also maintains a close connection to local organizations such as the Mennonite Central Committee. Its settlement committee worked closely with TRAC to bring the family from the Congo, and Jordan had the opportunity to intern with the organization over the summer.

Like MCC, and other NGOs of a similar model, TRAC occupies a unique political position. By nature members insert value-laden judgements into political and sovereign conflicts; “We recognize that the blessings we have are not our own, and due to the value of every human life we seek to enrich the lives of those suffering.” However, their website insists that they remain open to volunteers regardless of their political affiliations, as long as they agree to serve according to TRAC’s values.

Awareness As TRAC itself grows in awareness of the crisis, the organization must come to terms with the fact that this is a global issue. Terminology like “The Refugee Crisis” inclines individuals to associate this issue with specific conflicts isolated in specific regions, such as Syria. Unfortunately, this tendency ignores the reality that nearly every continent has a refugee crisis.

“We hope that we can magnify the voices and stories of the 65.6 million people that are displaced around the world rather than speaking for them. These people are just that: people.”

As TRAC looks to the future, the organization is forced to acknowledge that several other issues have taken over the headlines. TRAC has also recently brought on a new Director of Communications, as the current director is graduating this year.

LOVE and Logistics TRAC’s core team is a testament to the empowered Trinity community; however, as the organization expands and looks to the future, some logistical challenges begin to arise.

The fact that TRAC is run by students poses several logistical complications— students are subject to deadlines and busy schedules. Arguably, however, we have more disposable time and energy than we will ever have.

TRAC currently works in partnership with Trinity’s LOVE ministries. LOVE (Local Outreach Volunteering and Evangelism) ministries, under the supervision of Peter Woekel, provides opportunities for students to volunteer with local organizations in the community. TRAC’s team, lead by Volunteer Coordinators Andrea Rodríguez and Sarah Kazanows-

ki, participates by sending volunteers from the Trinity community to serve at the Middle Eastern Friendship centre. A previous Mars’ Hill article discussed the centre’s work, and TRAC’s vision for their partnership. TRAC is currently advertising for the position of volunteer coordinator, as Andrea intends to diversify her roles and responsibilities within the organization.

Creative Ventures When TRAC first began, its most ambitious goal was to raise the funds and gather the resources necessary to settle a family here in Canada. At the end of August, they were successful. Just a few short days before O-day, the family arrived in Canada after a long journey from the Congo.

Jordan commented on their experience: “It is so easy for me to think that it is strange that they’ve never used a toaster, eaten pizza, seen snow, heard of hockey, or seen a domesticated dog.

But, have you ever eaten ugali, spoken Swahili, or navigated the rainy season?

With this perspective, it’s not just the individual experiences that are unique; it is the combination and the sheer enormity of a complete life change.” Members of TRAC all testify to the family’s faith and fortitude despite their experience.

As the settlement project comes to a close, TRAC continues to provide opportunities for students and members of the community to donate. The primary ongoing project is a scholarship for a refugee student to come to Trinity. The vision to “share inspiration” protects the innately human right to contribute, innovate, pursue self-improvement and answer God’s call. TRAC is also hopeful that through this effort, the Trinity community will be challenged to be a more comprehensive representation of the image of Christ.

“I don’t have a butt, it’s just an all-consuming void” – Connor Thiessen

5

Currently, only one per cent of refugees gain a post-secondary education: “Stop and think about that,” said Jordan. “Think about why you are attending university, the doors it opens, and the community and experiences that have impacted you. This opportunity is only made possible to 1% of people that have been forced from home because of circumstances that they likely did nothing to deserve.”

Also, TRAC intends to “share tastes” by publishing a cookbook. In addition to preserving traditions and stories, the cookbook will facilitate cultural exchange between interested Canadians and refugees.

Pursuing Belonging in Diversity As TRAC grows in its capacity to serve refugees from around the world, the vision must expand to accommodate diverse needs and specific concerns.

Jordan has this to say in regards to this issue: “The challenge with serving such a diverse body of people is that everyone views the world differently and handles circumstances differently. That said, the greatest joy in serving such a large diversity of people is the same: that everyone views the world differently and handles circumstances differently. This variance specifically makes it difficult to discern how to best communicate and love a person that may seem so different than yourself, but it also provides such an incredible opportunity to learn and broaden your perspectives on people and the world.”

Essentially, while distinct communities have nuanced needs, unique individuals also innovate diverse solutions. Over the past year, TRAC has demonstrated its ability to find and empower remarkable individuals who are capable of innovating and implementing creative solutions.

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SUMMERTIME, AND SOME SAY OUR LIVIN'S IN JEOPARDY CHRISALEEN CIRO

Even as second semester gets underway, Trinity students are already thinking ahead to summer jobs. However, recent action by Justin Trudeau’s government may make the job search more complicated. Every year, Canadian students depend on the Summer Student Jobs Program to create jobs to finance their schooling. While 67,000 new jobs were added to the program in 2017, it does not necessarily follow that opportunities will be expanded for students of Trinity.

In the past, Trinity students have benefited from the program by working for churches to run day-camps, serving at camp, or performing basic administrative tasks for other Christian organizations.

Organizations apply to participate in the program, and are rated based on a points system. Small business, charity organizations, and NGOs can apply for funding to hire students for the summer.

This evaluative system is based on federal priorities such as Syrian refugee resettlement projects, or hiring refugee or indigenous students.

100 days in office by announcing he was doubling the annual budget of 107.3 million. Liberals celebrate the fact that the program received 30 percent more applications from organizations.

H o w e v e r, despite his best efforts, and doubled spending, the 2016 numbers stayed

consistent from 2015.

The program caused controversy again when it was announced that funding would be denied to organizations which could not agree to specific ideological claims.

According to Labour Minister, Patty Hajdu, who ordered a review of the p r o -

Mr. Trudeau’s passion for the jobs program is well established.

In 2016, he marked

ROE V. WADE AND SHALOM

KEEKPEEP STOP STOP

ABORTION ABORTIONABORTION ABORTION

L E L EL G A G AL

KELSEY MORRIS This past January, I saw the beginning of yet another year that is likely to be riddled with controversy, distrust, and political polarization across our globalized world. In January, the U.S. government shut down for nearly 72 hours, North American Free Trade Agreement, and soberly faced the first anniversary of the inauguration of President Donald Trump. Just two days prior, American men and women participated in the 2018 Women’s March, accompanied by sister rallies across the globe – for the second year in a row.

We’ve witnessed it. We’ve seen the elections, divisive politics, scandals, hashtag movements, and marches. We’re angry and emboldened; we’re scared and heartbroken. And we’re exhausted.

But this month, following such a tumultuous start to this new year, we aren’t allowed to be complacent.

NOW NOW

This January also marks the anniversaries of the Roe v. Wade and R v. Morgentaler decisions of the United States and Canada, respectively. Forty-five years ago, the decision of the American Supreme Court to decriminalize abortion reverberated around the Western world.

Thirty years ago, Canada’s Supreme Court faced a similar question of abortion constitutionality, and responded by striking down the section of the Criminal Code which had previously restricted the procedure.

While the issue of abortion has not seen any sort of resolution among citizens or politicians since these massively impactful decisions, the current climate of world politics – American politics in particular – requires our increasing awareness and revisitation to the issue’s prevalence in Canada, North America, and around the world.

According to the Guttmacher Institute, 30 states introduced legislation restrict

ing abortion during 2017. Over the past three decades policy makers developed several creative strategies to restrict abortion, while avoiding criminalization.

With Vice President Mike Pence at his side, President Donald Trump rewarded his evangelical voters by approving such legislation, cutting funding to abortion clinics, and tightening the reins on abortion access.

Additionally, since his election to office, legislators across 19 states have adopted 63 new restrictions on abortion, including new stipulations making prenatal ultrasounds a mandatory prerequisite to the abortion procedure.

Due to this increasing political focus on abortion, the issue has once again found purchase in our contemporary discourse. Unsurprisingly, the tone of these discussions is one of hostility and divisiveness; as women across the world marched this past month, the beautiful movement was partially undermined by a fundamental difference between pro-

“Nate Kara isn’t a vegan” – Drew Eliason

gram, “Applicants will be required to attest that both the job and the employer’s core mandate respect individual human rights in Canada.” Essentially, the review found it was necessary to cut off funding to pro-life, and non-LGBTQ+ affirming groups, regardless of whether these ideologies had any influence on the organization’s mandate or programming.

This action disproportionately affects religious institutions, including churches, which may impact job prospects for the average Trinity student.

However, critics of the new direction for the program have disputed the notion that this action was not partisan, because abortion rights’ groups will still receive funding. Leaders from 90 Christian, Muslim and Jewish groups wrote to Justin Trudeau challenging him to acknowledge “diversity of beliefs and values.” It would seem that some Members of Parliament, and the media, agree. MP Brad Trost argues: “That’s discrimination. Canadians are allowed to have different political views than the government of the day and they shouldn’t have their funding cut off because they disagree with the government.”

life and pro-choice feminists. During the march, pro-choice feminists were seen waving signs explicitly, stating that feminists aren’t legitimate feminists. Clearly, then, abortion continues to be not only a moral or religious issue, but one of a deeply political and social nature.

Over the last several decades since the landmark decisions of the American and Canadian Supreme Courts, the prochoice and pro-life movements have both aligned with and diverged from feminists throughout our modern world.

The jury of modern, liberal feminists is still deliberating on how the rights to privacy and autonomy intersect with the right to life. Fortunately, though, a verdict is not what we need right now – we need Christ.

We are in desperate need of unity, relationship, and strength, even in the face of issues that are deeply moral and religious, as well as political. Relevant Magazine’s Katie Bergman reiterates that there are forces of change that extend far beyond politics: “After all, we are ultimately responsible for loving and nurturing human souls. The government will work toward liberty of its citizens.

The church must work toward Shalom.”

On the anniversaries of Roe v. Wade, of President Trump’s shocking inauguration, of the iconic Women’s March of 2017, and of R v. Morgentaler, we are urged to acknowledge our agency. With this recognition comes a profound obligation. In facing such arduous realities, we cultivate dignity, responsibility, and authentic humanity. And we just might find the rarest of contemporary commodities – hope.

THE BIG PICTURE, BROKEN DOWN JESSE MARA

7 ACADEMY NIKI MARA nicolemara@mytwu.ca

When I was five years old, my parents decided to spend some time doing missionary work in Medellin, Colombia. Without any pressing matters at the time, my two younger brothers and I agreed to go with. We soon found ourselves in a picturesque mountainous region where my parents ministered in a small church and did social care work in town.

One of my first experiences in Colombia included malevolent fire ants. I was viciously attacked by these evil ants, which seemed to materialize out of nowhere.

Their venomous bites sent me screaming in frenzied circles until my dad could catch up with me, strip my clothes off and wipe the vicious biting creatures from my skin. I would later watch with vengeful glee as my dad poured gasoline into the entrance of the fire ant nest. As the nest lit up in flames, a wicked smile simultaneously lit up on my face as I beheld the demise of my enemies.

I have plenty of positive memories, too: picking coffee beans in our backyard, collecting ripe mangoes from our tree, running through the banana groves with the neighbor’s kids who lived a little higher up the mountain, and worship service in our small church.

Then there were the streets of central Medellin. Here I was faced with a new picture of humanity, and it was a shock to my young

mind. The noisy, crowded streets were lined with repulsive people in various states of decay. Some were missing limbs; some were suffering t h e effects of leprosy (Hansen’s disease); some were children just older than I was.

Two feelings welled in my mind: revulsion and compassion. I remember thinking of the Bible stories my parents had read me.

I knew what Jesus would do if He were there. He would help these people. He would comfort them.

I remember the first time my mom handed me some money and told me to give it, along with a gospel tract, to one of these unfortunates. I froze. I stared at the filthy, bedraggled man in front of me.

He only smiled back, his remaining blackened teeth doubling his repulsiveness. But I remember his eyes: they were sincere and kind. Somehow, I found the courage to give him our offering (or maybe my mom just pushed me forward). I remember the look of gratitude on the old man’s face.

He was as human as me. But why did he exist in such a deplorable state? How did he end up here?

At the tender age of five, I was presented the task of processing these disturbing events; and it is here, I believe, that I began my journey in philosophy.

As I grew older and as we traveled to other places of service—Mexico, U.S., Russia, Ukraine—a sense of responsibility was incumbent upon m e .

I began to see it as my duty to take an active part in equalizi n g global society, a.k.a. changing the world. At least my part of the world. So, along with creating and playing music and teaching English to pay the bills, I made a career of mission work. And I have no regrets.

However, charity does not neces-

sarily have to be far from home.

Yes, Jesus was a “foreign missionary” because He left His heavenly country, but really, He became human: a Jewish human who grew up in Nazareth. He was a local boy, and in His short ministry, He stayed local. So, local or global, both are vital.

Jesus, it seemed, was quite concerned about the social equality in His part of the world.

H e was worried that people might not make it home safely after his wilderness sermon, so He made sure they had sufficient nutrition. He was concerned about a woman who had been caught committing a crime which condemned her to immediate death. Jesus never hesitated to take the time to associate with and heal filthy beggars, sinful prostitutes and traitorous tax collectors.

He also taught theory. One such lesson, was about a beggar named Lazarus, possibly not even a Jew. He was admitted to Paradise and was lovingly embraced by Father Abraham, while a local businessman, whose principal crime, in God’s eyes, was a lack of compassion for the poor, was admitted, upon death, to a place of rather intense suffering. Abraham, speaking from Paradise, made an interesting comment to the formerly wealthy man: “Sorry, the tables have been turned and it’s Lazarus’ turn to have it good. Too bad you didn’t participate in social care when you had the chance. You had the means, the time, and the opportunity, but you didn’t have compassion. You really blew it.”

This example is only one of many where a person of power and means pursues a hedonistic lifestyle. However, could we be the bearers of God’s justice in a diseased global society? It sounds grandiose, but apparently this is the case. I believe that those of

“I shot the sheriff” – Daniel Flowers

us who have been educated in Christ’s teachings are called to be an equalizing force. It seems it is our duty (and burden) to equalize, as much as we are able, and to use our unique talents. How much good are we really doing?

Well, take heed of this verse: “The way you treat the most unfortunate people in your society is the way you treat me.” —Jesus (Matt. 25) Jesus, who led an exemplary life

and promised to come back to this world to restore peace, hopes that we, as His children, will pick up where He left off.

Where we choose to work is not important. Every society, including Canada, needs our service.

Everyone who identifies themselves as “Christian” can be a missionary for life, every church can be a mission centre, every Christian school or university can be a training facility.

If the mandates recorded in the gospels are relevant, then three questions seem equally relevant: When can we start? (Now).

Where can we start? (Wherever you are reading this article). Who can we help? (The closest person to you—probably, in your case, a fellow student or maybe a professor). Start there, the rest of the world can wait.

8

TAKING IMPROV COMEDY SERIOUSLY NATHAN STEIN

A few years ago, I met a fellow classmate in an improv comedy class in Vancouver who told me she was there because it was “better than therapy.” As a psychology student, I found those three words incredibly curious.

What reason could she have had to believe that an improv class would benefit her more than therapy?

My experiences with therapy had been positive enough to motivate me to work toward becoming a practitioner myself, so I was immediately inspired to understand what had made her experience with improv contrast so powerfully with her experience of therapy—exactly what did improv do for her that therapy did not? This question of the common ground between improv comedy and mental health persists for me, but the topic’s significance has deepened in recent years as improv-based therapies, for a variety of psychological disorders, have actually emerged amidst the educational offerings of certain comedy clubs.

It may be difficult to understand how improv comedy could ever be an appropriate tool for therapy without first defining exactly what improv is. Generally speaking, improv has been defined as “any theatrical performance occurring without a script.” More specifically, improv serves as the abbreviation for improvisation as both a skill and a family of performance formats (i.e. improvisational theatre, improvisational comedy, theatresports, etc.) with a shared history and mechanism. Improv, in the former sense, may be used in scripted acting and comedy, (for example, Harrison Ford’s famous “I know” from The Empire Strikes Back), but an otherwise scripted performance still

does not qualify as “improv” in the latter sense. To qualify as such, a performance must be entirely unscripted, deriving solely from the spontaneity of the performers—no prior planning, forethought, or rehearsal. To demonstrate integrity to this premise, improvisers incorporate audience suggestions at various points throughout a show, typically as inspiration for scenes.

This provides the opportunity for the audience to test the performers’ purported spontaneity, and imbues the performance with its most compelling quality— risk. Working with each suggestion, rising to each challenge, is where improv derives its magic.

Improv was not originally conceived as a form of comedy by its pioneers in the 1950s, but rather as a new form of theatre that was liberated from the structures of conventional theatre. As such, it was never intended to produce gags and jokes (produced much more reliably in forms of comedy like stand-up and sketch that adhere to the conventions of scripted theatre), but rather to tell stories that might never take shape beyond the moment of pure spontaneity. It did not take long, however, to discover that laughter was a remarkably consistent feature of improvised storytelling, often occurring independently of any gag or joke. Today, improv is still used on occasion to tell dramatic stories, although the clear comic tendency of improv has solidified improv comedy as its most ubiquitous form.

The Second City comedy club in Chicago—think Tina Fey, Amy Poehler, Stephen Colbert, and Bill Murray— has been adapting the principles of improv for ther-

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“I actually don’t like TWUSA coffee” – Cheyanne Makelki

apy for about a decade. They offer programs that leverage the mental health benefits of improv for seniors, those on the autism spectrum, and—through their flagship Improv For Anxiety program—those with social anxiety.

The Second City collaborated with mental health professionals to design Improv For Anxiety as a clinical intervention that would integrate easily with cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT). Participants learn to manage social anxiety symptoms and reduce avoidance behaviours using skills derived from improv, which foster recognized therapeutic dimensions like group cohesiveness, play, exposure, and humour. The Second City recognizes the theoretical links between these concepts and their analogues in the fundamentals of improvised performance, which form the theoretical basis for improv therapy. Psychologists have similarly drawn parallels between improv and foundational change agents like empathy and unconditional positive regards, which combines with positive media attention and increasing numbers of imitation programs at other comedy clubs to suggest a positive review for existing iterations of improv therapy.

Improv For Anxiety is just one example of a field that has rapidly expanded over the last decade, encompassing much more than just therapy. Referred to by some as applied improv, this field is interested in the indirect personal and social benefits of learning improv. Improvisers are remarkably creative in exploring these avenues and as a result, principles, ideas, and techniques derived from the practice of improv are applied to such diverse fields as business, social work, and education. Improv helped businesses to deconstruct traditional “hero-leader” thinking and improve group collaboration. In social work, improv lent itself as a framework for navigating novel circumstances that inevitably arise with clients.

Finally, as an educational tool, it helped promote undergraduate students’ psychological resilience, enhance sales training, facilitate micro-skills training for counsellors, and improve the quality of doctor-patient interactions in medical settings.

The spirit of applied improv is everyday life and ordinary people, which stems from one of improv’s basic assumptions: anyone can improvise. In fact, improv classes are generally more concerned with unlearning faulty predispositions and attitudes than learning new ones. Improvisers generally don’t see themselves as having skills that others don’t have, but as having re-educated themselves in such a way as to be comfortable using skills that everyone has, but most inhibit. This re-education is fundamental to the practice of improv comedy, and applied improv sees the value of that re-education in non-performance contexts. All this considered, it may just be time that you took a more serious interest in improv comedy yourself.

10

OF THE HECKING COOLEST ANIMALS IN THE OCEAN

1

BASKING SHARK

HANNAH AHRENDT

Oceans. I know you’ve heard of them.

Those vast bodies of water stretch out far beyond what the eye can see. Your imagination conjures images of calm waves crashing lightly against the shores of the beach in the summertime. That serene, beautiful sunset on a nice day causes waves to flicker with the glow of a thousand dazzling rays as they rush endlessly towards the land only to dive back again and again, forever engaged in a delicate dance that scoffs at the progressive machinations of time. But these majestic waves belie something far deadlier than is immediately apparent. Yes, below the surface of the sparkly waters await bloodthirsty jellyfish whose yearning for human flesh is never quite satiated. Yes indeed, the oceans are undoubtedly dangerous, unfathomably deep, and unquestionably dope. Join me as we explore my latest discoveries about the top ten hecking coolest animals in the ocean.

2

YETI CRAB Discovered in 2005 in Pacific-Antarctic hydrothermal vents, yeti crabs are part of phylum Arthropoda and subphylum Crustacea with scientific name Kiwa hirsuta. The yeti crab is so named for its hairy legs, which are unusually large for a crab. Scientists have not yet figured out the purpose of the hair on the legs, though it is speculated that bacteria housed in them may help detoxify poisonous materials from the hydrothermal vents. Although they are thought to be blind by nature, they are carnivores, and are able to hunt and kill their prey.

5

IMMORTAL JELLYFISH The immortal jellyfish is just as cool as its name suggests. And yes, it is biologically immortal.

Belonging to phylum Cnidaria and class Hydrozoa, it has the unique ability of being able to return to a polyp stage after reaching sexual maturity in the medusa stage. This essentially means that the organism can return to childhood and has no maximum life-span.

8

DUMBO OCTOPUS The Dumbo octopus’ name originates from the similarity of their appearance to the Disney character Dumbo.

These little guys are typically 20-30 cm long and live around 400-4800m below the surface of the ocean, making them the deepest living octopus.

They are umbrella-shaped and have an ear-like fin above each eye. They belong to the genus Grimpoteuthis.

9

The largest shark known to man, right after the whale shark. The basking shark is of the phylum Chordata and the class Chondrichthyes. It’s scientific name is Cetorhinus maximus. Not much is known about the behaviour of the basking shark, except that it is quite indifferent to humans. It prefers colder climates, though it has been found as far south as the equator. The basking shark feeds by opening its one meter-wide mouth, peacefully patrolling the waters, and filtering out zooplankton while expelling the water out of its gills.

3

COMB JELLY T h o u g h they’re called “jellies,” these creatures aren’t true jellyfish.

Instead, they belong to the phylum Ctenophora. Comb jellies are named for the eight rows of fused cilia that run across their bodies called combs. They use the cilia to swim and are the largest animals that do this. The cilia scatter light when they move, creating a rainbow effect that is often mistaken for bioluminescence. Though they have a pair of tentacles, they lack the cnidocytes (stinging cells) that Cnidarians (jellyfish, anemones, etc.) possess. Instead they have colloblasts which function similarly, but release a glue-like substance instead of venom. Their tentacles are used to catch prey.

4

6

BLUE DRAGON SEA SLUG The blue dragon sea slug’s scientific name, Glaucus atlanticus, sounds just as awesome as its common name. These sea slugs, also known as nudibranchs, float upside down just under the surface of the water. Their blue underside camouflages them from predators in the air and their silver backside causes them to blend in with the brightness of the sky seen from below. They feed on hydrozoans, including the highly poisonous Portuguese Man o’ War, but aren’t affected by the venom. Instead, they store the cnidocytes, (cells that aid in capturing prey), and use them as a defense against predators when attacked.

9

GOBLIN SHARK Goblin sharks are perhaps the creepiest looking sharks in existence, and when you’re talking about sharks, that’s saying something. It is best known for its prominent snout and protruding jaws. With a maximum of 53 rows of top teeth and 62 rows of bottom teeth, it earns its common name. They are unskilled swimmers and must move slowly towards their prey to avoid detection. As a result, their jaws have the ability to slide forward as they bite, allowing them to catch their prey. As the only living member of the ancient Mitsukurinidae family, it is often called a “living fossil.”

“I think Cal Townsend is wrong” – Tobin Voth

VAMPIRE SQUID Despite their name, vampire squid feed on detritus called “marine snow,” not blood. They belong to phylum Mollusca and class Cephalopoda with scientific name Vampyroteuthis infernalis.

It lives in what is known as the “oxygen minimum zone” deep in the ocean and can breathe normally even when oxygen levels are at three per cent. If intensely threatened, they eject a cloud of sticky bioluminescent mucus that serves to daze predators while they escape. Few animals have such a fabulous exit strategy.

7

SPOOKFISH These fish, also known as barreleye, are from the family Opisthoproctidae. The name “barreleye” comes from the unusual shape of their eyes, which are long and tubular. They are typically pointed upwards, though they can rotate to be directed forwards. Their dome-shaped head is transparent while the rest of their body is a darkbrown colour. They live in anywhere from 100-900m below the ocean’s surface.

10

BLOBFISH The Blobfish, scientific name Psychrolutes microporos, is also known as fathead. It is aptly named as it is known for its whitish colour, flattened head, fleshy snout, and wide mouth. It’s body is firm and gelatinous which allows it to withstand the pressure of the abyssal zone in which it resides. The Blobfish is thought to be a predator that relies mostly on ambush and eats whatever passes within reach.

10

DISCOVERY // DEFINED

RYAN NATWICK

Discovery isn’t easy, certainly not; but at the same time, it isn’t very hard. Merriam-Webster defines the word “discover” as to: “find (something or someone) unexpectedly or in the course of a search.” That means that when you lose your phone and spend 20 “ THEY MAY NOT minutes looking for it only to find HAVE KNOWN THAT it in your pocket, that you have, by THEY WOULD END UP definition, made a discovery.

IN THE PLACE THAT THEY DID, BUT THEY Congratulations, people will now PUT IN THE WORK and forever talk about the great TIME AND TIME AGAIN. “ discoveries of: Nicolaus Copernicus, who discovered the universe is heliocentric; Sir Isaac Newton, who discovered gravity; Christopher Columbus, who discovered the Americas, and you (the reader) who discovered that your phone was in fact in your pocket.

All joking aside, you contain the same ability to discover that these historic individuals had. Discovery is just one type of success that can easily become popularized, but what I am going to address in this article are the key things you need to be successful in whatever field you strive for, whether that is discovery in sports, business, or raising a family. It is simple, you just need to start working towards that goal, but you do actually have to do it and that is the hard part.

When I first started to workout, there was this common expression that “the hardest part of any workout is showing up.” The idea here is that once you are able to commit to doing something and you take that first step, the rest of the process seems easier. This first step is the very step that is proving to be the hardest. A recent study done out of San Diego State University found that younger people have a decreased appreciation for putting in the work. The study showed that around 40% of the people studied would prefer to not work as hard, which was juxtaposed with adults born in the 70’s, which only had 25% who would prefer to not work as hard. This shows that there has been a decreased value placed on putting in the work.

Although this study specifically focused on how people felt about having a job, it is easy to see that the implications far exceed just the workplace. We are currently living in a world where people do not want to put in the work to get results; you can’t turn on a TV without seeing an advertisement that helps you: lose weight quickly, clean something with less effort, or make you money instantaneously without doing any work. In short, we have come to a place where we want things without putting in the work to get them.

So then, with this lack of motivation established, how do we move on? That is one of the many difficulties with this whole issue. In short, one needs to simply do it. It is a very binary situation where either someone is taking that first step towards their goal, or they are not. But saying this, is giving a “what” answer to a “how” question. Unfortunately, there is not one straightforward answer. There is as many solutions as there are people and because of that, everyone must be able to look inside of themselves and recognize what motivation they need to be successful. People who are intrinsically motivated will need to find what about intrinsic motivation motivates them, and operate out of that motivation. People who are extrinsically motivated need to be able to set up systems that will enable them to work toward an achievement.

What comes after the first step? Success, right? Wrong. Well, probably wrong. I suppose that you might be one of those lucky individuals who succeeds at anything they want because of what seems to be sheer talent that they were born with, but if you aren’t one of those people, it is okay. You, like me, are in the majority. Most people aren’t capable of picking up any skill very quickly unless they have talent in a related field.

“I ate my twin in the womb” – Maria Jimenez

11

So, what comes next after the first step? Practice. There is that famous saying that says, “It takes ten thousand hours to master a skill,” but ten thousand hours is approximately 466 days. So, if you want to become successful you need to commit about one and a third years of time in your life to mastering whatever you want to become good at. That may seem like a stretch to some of you and rightfully so; that’s a lot of time. Looking at such a large number to reach is often daunting and discouraging. Instead, you should focus on 20 hours. Josh Kaufman, a famous entrepreneur, did a study which looked at how long it took for the average individual to learn any given skill and he found that it would take, on average, 20 hours of practice for someone to become proficient at a new skill. Now, there is a very big difference between proficient and someone who has mastered any given talent (approximately 9,980 hours), but you don’t become a master without first becoming proficient.

Looking back at the people who were mentioned earlier, you will see that none of them simply appeared as a discoverer, they had to put in hours upon hours of work to become good at what they did before their discovery was made. Nicolaus Copernicus was educated extensively in Poland as a child and continued his education in Italy. He worked for years as a mathematician and as an astrologist. It was only after doing multiple different studies of the habits of the solar system, that he was able to conclude that the Milky Way was heliocentric. This is a similar story to that of Sir Isaac Newtons. He was educated for many years, attended Cambridge, taught at Cambridge, and developed many different aspects of mathematics. He used these different stepping stones that he was able to lay as a foundation for his basis in physics.

Now, I know that Christopher Columbus was not actually the first person to find the Americas and that there are a whole lot of other problems with his (un)ethical behavior, but he is often referred to as the one finding the Americas, and for that reason I have decided to look at him.

When we look at what lead to Columbus making his trip to the Americas, we realize that he had been sailing since he was ten. That means that before he set off in 1492, he had been sailing for 41 years. I am going to go out on a limb and suggest that by the time he had sailed that famous voyage, he had over ten thousand hours of experience sailing.

I raise the question again: what is the difference between you and those famous individuals who discovered great things? Well, they did something. They were able to take those first steps that are the hardest to take. They were able to motivate themselves to start towards a goal and then they continued.

They may not have known that they would end up in the place that they did, but they put in the work time and time again. After becoming proficient at what they did, they kept working, kept getting better, and eventually, because of all that work, they did something historic which people still look back at and refer to as a turning point in history.

I wish that there was some simple answer, or faster way of getting better at the things that we aspire towards, but it doesn’t seem like there is. Like all things that are worth it, you need to be willing to sacrifice. Sacrifice the time, sacrifice the energy, sacrifice experiences, and someday it might pay off. It is important to note that it is really only a might. In the end, there is uncertainty in the whole situation because nothing is guaranteed. You could put nine thousand hours into basketball, but before your career can really take off, you break a leg in a car accident and can never play again. Or, you could be attempting to translate the Bible into different languages which it hasn’t been done before, but part way through one of the translations, you get a concussion and lose the ability “ AFTER BECOMING PROFICIENT AT WHAT to remember key words. UnfortuTHEY DID, THEY KEPT WORKING, KEPT nately, there is no real sure shot GETTING BETTER, AND EVENTUALLY, BEway to become successful, but the CAUSE OF ALL THAT WORK, THEY DID only way to heavily increase your SOMETHING HISTORIC WHICH PEOPLE chances of success, is by getting STILL LOOK BACK AT AND REFER TO AS A out there, putting in the work, and TURNING POINT IN HISTORY. “ just doing it.

“I am a Soviet spy” – Niki Mara

12 ARTS & CULTURE JOEL REDEKOP jsaredkop@gmail.com

ABBY PERNSTEINER Few things are more powerful than the hatred a fan feels for a bad adaptation of a beloved work. The rage is so powerful as to create an almost hedonistic addiction to the righteous indignation at the Hollywood schmucks that dared trample your precious favourites and transform them into watered down blandness that “totally misses the point.”

I have experienced this particular brand of fury at multiple points in my life, but the first and perhaps most potent to date, was my reaction to M. Night Shyamalan’s film adaptation of the popular television show Avatar: The Last Airbender. Hundreds upon hundreds of internet think-pieces have been written on the lackluster acting, horrendous writing and atrocious pacing, and I will not waste your time by reiterating it.

If you have seen the movie, you know too well the joyless wasteland this film created out of a creative and complex fantasy world. If you have not, no impassioned rhetoric can convey to you the depths of loathing I (and many others) have for this movie.

But, however unlikely it seems, it marked a turning point in my life, and could easily be considered the impetus for my coming of age.

The movie is so bad it achieved a water cooler conversation status among fans of the original show.

Once two fans spot one another, the conversation inevitably turns to articulating exactly how and why the film failed all of Western civilization. True, it’s essentially

HOW THE LAST

airbender

CHANGED MY LIFE

(NO I’M NOT KIDDING)

the same conversation repeated ad infinitum, but its cleansing and good for the soul.

During one such conversation, I was pointed towards an online review by an internet critic I had heard of once or twice before, but not watched. I found it both immensely funny and quite incisive about things I hadn’t even noticed.

I ended up watching more of his videos. It was still funny, but it was the first time I had ever interacted with any kind of film criticism. I began to realize the field went well beyond “bad acting,” “bad writing,” and “bad effects.” There was an entire world I had not previously been aware of: editing, cinematography, directing, the use of visuals versus of dialogue. These were all things I had ignored or taken for granted, but once these things were pointed out to me, I couldn’t avoid thinking about it. It was an experience akin to Neo taking the red pill in The Matrix (if The Matrix had zero stakes and if instead of joining a cyberpunk revolution, Neo just turned into someone kind of insufferable to watch movies with).

I was always interested in literary criticism, and this was a fascinating extension of that for me. I was hungry for more. I found Lindsay Ellis, Kyle Kallgren of Brows Held High, and Dan Olson of Folding Ideas. To these reviewers, movies were not simply something you watched to kill two hours. Films are cultural artifacts, crafted by teams of dedicated people to communicate a truth to an audience. Admittedly, sometimes it ia poor truth. Sometimes it is a poor truth poorly communicated.

But it is always worth the time to listen to what the filmmakers are trying to say.

Narratives are not simply something to be consumed, but dissected and really thought about.

Once you start dissecting fictional narratives, the next natural step is to start dissecting the narratives around you, or at least it was for me. Politics came into my field of interest, by the suggestions leading me along the chain.

Feminism. Psychology. Animation. History.

All of this, because of a single movie I hated with a white hot passion.

Ultimately, I think this is the true power of the media. One thing leads to another, leads to another, leads to another. In the age of “YouTube Recommends,” predictive algorithms and “Customers Also Viewed,” there has never been a better time to discover, explore and learn.

Stories, whether told through the page or the screen, matter, not only for the personal enjoyment they can bring, but because they introduce you to a wider world.

All storytelling is built on the founda-

tion of those who came before. Batman is in many ways a modernization of Zorro. Jane Eyre was inspired by Emma.

Old myths weave through today’s stories, whether explicitly or subtextually. Even your favorite YouTuber is likely standing on the shoulders of those who came before them. And of course, it is still possible to enjoy stories without knowing their precursors.

But, there is a certain richness that is added to the experience of consuming media when you can understand what it is derived from. When you’re watching a movie and suddenly pick up on references, whether to a book, the director’s earlier work, or another film... that’s the moment you shift from a passive consumer of media to an engaged critic of it. You begin to see movies, television, and literature not as a giant pile of independently produced works, but an interconnected web, each inspiring the other. Some take ideas and reproduce them for a different audience with a different worldview. Others critique previous creators’ work.

Of course, there’s nothing wrong with a little passive consumption now and again. One can watch and enjoy The Lion King without knowing that it borrows elements from both Hamlet and Henry IV. But there is value to engaging with the narratives that surround you. Stories teach us about ourselves.

They let us experience things we might otherwise never know. They instruct, dramatize, create empathy, demand thought, and, even if only in some small way, leave the reader or viewer changed after. They allow us to encounter new ideas and explore them thoroughly. Whether or not you accept the idea is up to you, but it will invite you to dive in and see what can be seen.

Read the people your favourite authors loved. Watch the movies your favourite directors watched. Find critics you like and follow where they point you. There are many, many stories to be discovered.

“I’m Catholic.” – Joey Schweitzer

13

WHO ARE YOU? SARAH LOOBY

“We’re All in this Together” were the profound lyrics of my childhood. High School Musical, with its elitist jocks, beautiful couples, and memorable music, formed what my eleven-year-oldself thought school to be like. This, you must understand, comes from the perspective of an impressionable homeschooler.

Yet sadly, high school turned out to be much less musically inclined with power couples that were not so quirkily paired; instead, the academic beauties and the basketball beasts steered in separate directions.

High School Musical had something right, and in a way, I see it more in university than I did in high school. The jocks, the artists, the musicians, the nerds, the science students, and the dancers all with their groups, their people, and their identities on which they build their labels. It is why Spartan athletes date each other, and why the commuters grow close bonds. We identify

with people like and near us.

I was born, raised, and encouraged to live, breathe music. I discovered my identity in twisting musical lines, and the quirky yet accepting fellow musicians.

On leaving this music infused realm, I felt the need to redefine who I was.

This idea of “who I am” or “discovering myself” is pretty common around Trinity.

We all want to be a part of Troy or Gabriella’s squad.

The

being a Spartan athlete, an academic, in the humanities or sciences, one of the elite religious majors, or an international or third country kid, these groups mold, shape, and form us as we discover who we are when a part of these select community.

Yet, what if self-discovery was not the be-all and end-all of who we are? Here lies the challenge: did God call us to self-discovery or self-inquiry? I define inquiry as looking into our self to see what needs to be changed and trans-

formed. The only way to do this though, is to look first to God, and then with His focus and His plan, look back at “me.”

Self-inquiry turns our eyes to God—to ask for His plan—and then turn those eyes inward focused—to ask how does His plan change our lives?

“I surrender all” is a beloved Christian phrase. With this line we vow to lay down our lives, our identities, and follow God. It is a promise—yet as with our focus on discovering our identities, we forget that who we are is first and foremost in Christ. Period. If we know God, then our “self-discovery” is over.

Our identity is no longer founded in our ethnicity, our social group, or our religious background.

We are Children of God, and as such, we must surrender ourselves— with all the titles and labels we have picked up along the way. As we are “All in This Together,” let’s strip them down, pull them apart, and start anew with the foundation being: I am a Child of God.

idea of being in a community gives us a sense of security. From

THE GREATEST SHOWMAN: MASTERPIECE OR MENDACITY? EMMA DYKSTRA As of January 25th, 2018, 20th Century Fox’s new musical masterpiece The Greatest Showman has grossed over 117 million dollars in Canada and the United States alone. The film does not fail to excite and enamour anyone who gets the chance to see it. Loosely based off the life story of American showman Phineas Taylor Barnum, it tells the story of his journey in creating the Barnum and Bailey Circus. He creates a family of freaks and outcasts, with whom he produces a dazzling show for the world to see. By gathering this group of people with odd appearances, Barnum creates a setting where lives are transformed.

But who really was P.T. Barnum? A story like this just seems too good to be true.

While the movie shows Barnum to be a brilliant businessman and entertainer, in reality, he was more a “master of promotion and spin.” Barnum used people with deformities and created stories about them to draw the crowds in.

For example, Barnum adopted a dwarf known as Zip the Pinhead, who had microcephaly (a disease which makes the head smaller in proportion to the rest of the body). Barnum labeled him as “The What is It,” dressed him in a furry suit, put him in a cage with other monkeys, and ordered him to screech and rattle the bars like his caged companions.

Barnum told his customers that he was the missing link between humans and monkeys, discovered in Africa.

This wasn’t the only person to suffer from his storytelling. Barnum purchased and partially paralyzed an African-American

woman, Joice Heth, even after slavery had been abolished in New York state. He then put her on display as George Washington’s 161-year-old wet nurse. When she died, he hosted a live autopsy where people could pay 50 cents to see her opened up.

The Greatest Showman has messages that are encouraging at a first glance. But one should question why this film is loosely based on a man that does not have much to be celebrated for. In the film, Barnum says to Tom Thumb, “Everyone is special, no one is like anyone else. That’s the point of my show.” In reality, Barnum’s show was not meant to encourage and lift up the outcasts, but to instead, put them on

“joeys catholic” – Jared La Mar

display to make an extra buck.

Unfortunately, this kind of romanticized storytelling is all too common in Hollywood. Often, the real story is dolled up to become more appealing to audiences, dismissing the unpleasant facts that also contribute to the tale. For example, Maria Von Trapp admits in an autobiography that she didn’t love her husband at all when she married him, something we fail to see in another celebrated musical, The Sound of Music. Does this mean we can’t enjoy movies like The Greatest Showman?

Yes and no. We can appreciate the lessons they share and the magic they create, but we should seriously question why Hollywood chooses to ignore what should be considered important details of the actual lives they portray on screen.

14

ONE WAY FLIGHT

CHARLOTTE ELSON

For as long as I can remember, I have wanted to run away.

One of my earliest escapes was my Highland dancing classes. I was sitting in the changeroom before my last recital, and even though I was excited for my final dance, I asked my mom if we could leave. I felt my kilt swinging around my legs as I ran down the hallway of the studio, knowing my teacher and dance pals would never see me again. No one would know where I had gone. No one in my new Highland dance-free life would know about my past as a dancer, unless I wanted them to.

The suburb I grew up in was close enough to Toronto that I could take myself there, and with every opportunity I got, I went into the city. I felt the most alive and the most like myself as a face in the crowd, just one more person walking down the street, with a complete history no one knew, a history that could be rewritten in the endless glass buildings and strangers who could be new friends. So after graduating from university and feeling mostly directionless, I turned to the one thing I always wanted to do. The greatest

escape I could make. A one-way flight. With an aunt and uncle living in North London, and a British citizenship in my back pocket, I booked a one-way flight to London.

A friend – whose brutal honesty I sometimes hate – told me, “You’re trying to run away. And guess what, it’s not going to work. You’re going to have the same problems you have here; you’re going to be the same person there that you are here. You can’t run away from yourself.” He’s completely wrong, I thought, that’s BS. I’m not trying to run away from myself or any problems I have. Still, his words echoed through my mind, staying as much as thoughtful encouragement I received from others.

Maybe it defeats the romanticism of running away when you plan it for six months. But it means I got to take down my life like posters on a dorm room wall, one piece at a time.

I went through every bit of my old schoolwork, old photos, and the things under my bed, watching as all the mementos and detritus from all 22 years of my life reduced into smaller and smaller piles. I wrote my resignation emails to my bosses at work. I filled my calendar with last hangouts with friends. I bought rolls of film and a weekend bag. I sold

things on Kijiji and donated bags of clothing. I gave my best friend my record player and set it up in his tiny apartment with my speakers. I burned all my candles down to the wick and drank all my fancy tea. I took my entire life savings out of the bank. One morning, I woke up in my childhood bedroom, naked save for eight boxes at the foot of my bed, and three packed suitcases. It was time.

Twenty days since I stepped off my one-way flight and into the unknown, there’s been a lot of surprising discoveries. Even though two countries may speak the same language, they can do it very differently. Haggis is actually delicious. The buzz of giving your number to a total stranger. The sweet warmth of hearing a song of a small unknown band I love playing in a tiny pub at the train station in an English seaside town, 5079 km from home.

Ever since the first day I woke up in London, I have had a feeling I cannot quite describe. Half of it is freedom.

Pure freedom, as if it’s bottled and I’ve been drinking it every morning.

But the other half is something else.

Different than the satisfaction from any other running away I’ve ever done. I feel like I can truly breathe

“I am Sarah Wright” – Hannah Stover

and become whoever I am supposed to be, maybe for the first time ever.

Far from those who love me, no one is expecting me to be anyone other than the changeling human I am right now. It’s as if I crossed a threshold, and my past has fallen away like dust. The anxieties at the forefront of my mind have become paper thin, wrinkling as they get caught in the wind and blown away from the front row of my mind. My happiness here is rooted in peace, even though so much is unknown. It’s something that feels subtle and lasting, like an undercurrent around me rather than a neon light beaming THIS IS HAPPINESS. You can’t run away from yourself. But you can give yourself the space to become someone else. I don’t know what I will be doing in a month, or who I’ll be doing it with, but I know one thing for sure. There is absolutely so much out there to be discovered, far more that we get to thinking in the drudgery of daily life and in our own hang-ups and anxieties.

In humans, in places, in cultures, in food, in drinks, in yourself. And maybe you don’t even need to run away to find it.vv

AREOPAGITICA

15

What is this page all about?

Things that are accessible to all students, resources for students on campus, evaluating them as well, a place to write whatever you need to/want to regarding issues with campus, addressing problems, etc.

TORI AHRENDT MADISON POWERS

“Oh my goodness, you can DRAW?!”

If you are anyone of artistic ability, (or anyone who is a compulsive doodler), you have heard this phrase before and I’m sure you know what this phrase heralds. The blonde haired girl that was pointing her tiny finger at grade five me had shrieked this phrase confidently in my direction and I remember gaining a little cluster of people who came to see the Garfield and Odie related doodle I had created. Their praising comments soon turned to them asking for favours, as they piled request after request onto me.

I’m sure anyone of any artistic medium has felt this way before. It’s that shocking transition from, “Wow I love what you do,” to, “Omigosh do something for me,” which leaves the artist feeling confused and taken advantage of. Sure, you are a student and you do not have any developed credentials to speak of as you are still learning your craft, but it is not OK for people to assume they can trade friendly comments for a drawing or praising remarks for a story. “But Tori,” you are probably

asking, “you just said I am a student who has no credentials, so how do I reach a place where I can ask for compensation for what I do?!” Well young grasshopper, do I have some information for you! All of these things are discoveries I’ve made as someone who has been floating in the design department for the past year and a half.

POINT 1: Ask for compensation.

Like seriously. Ask. Remember that lovely anecdote from the start of this article? About my grade five self and my overwhelming art experience?

Well, being a kid who knew no better, I boldly declared that if anyone wanted anything from me they would have to pay me. And guess what, I got paid a whopping two dollars to draw a certain blonde girl some Garfield and Odie sketches. I was a kid, so I didn’t think and just asked and I think more of us need to have that mindset. Also, compensation does not always mean cold hard cash. It could just be something as simple as a friend taking you out to lunch, but at least it sets a precedent that you want compensation for what you do.

POINT 2: But Tori, my art isn’t good enough for me to charge for it! 100 % baloney (unless you are Jamison Derksen). I know a lot of you

young’uns (and old’uns, to be fair) like to bring yourself down a peg because you can’t draw like her or perform like him, but WHO CARES! Someone designed that ugly carpet from the 70s your grandma has in her apartment and they got paid, so why the heck can’t you?! Paint is not cheap and your time is not worthless, so don’t treat it like it is, or else other people will too!

POINT 3: Know your industry. Know how much student artists charge for their time, look up how much a videographer gets paid per hour, and look into how much newspapers pay per word. Then, when you do broach the topic of payment, you have a decent idea of how much you should charge. Also, be prepared to explain why you charge what you charge.

People will not understand why you want to be paid $500 for one photoshoot if you don’t express to them that it will take at least 25 hours of work to put everything together.

POINT 4: Build a brand. Any business starts with having a solid brand base that represents who they are and what they do, so why should art be any different? If you are an artist, in any capacity, you are a business owner by extension as your work is your commodity. Whether you cre-

“I cheated the last time I played Monopoly” – Andrew Kimball

ate paintings or act on Broadway, you need a brand. Make a logo, business cards, and a strong portfolio that highlights your abilities.

If you are an artist, make a website that showcases your art. If you are an actor, get a friend to video tape some of your acting and list all the productions you have been in. If you are a writer, create a blog or website to highlight your breakthrough works or published pieces. If you have something to show that showcases your ability, you become that much more hireable.

While I say all of this, I will note that if you are a beginning artist or someone trying to get more experience or exposure in your industry, it is OK to take on roles that are unpaid. But, do remember to move on from those positions after at least a year, or else the employer might be taking advantage of you. As creative people, it’s part of our responsibility to educate our friends to NOT take advantage of us and other creative people, and it is imperative that we do not ignore this prevalent issue.

Many people do not intend to take advantage of artistic people, but they just do not recognize that what creators do is both a passion project and a profession.

16 SPORTS

LET’S TALK

JAMISON DERKSEN jamison.derksen@mytwu.ca

JAMISON DERKSEN I’ve been sitting in Twins Coffee all afternoon, seeing a variety people filing in and out while I take down cappuccino after cappuccino. Many simply come in alone, and leave right away, whereas others sit down and stay for a while. I have no idea what is going on in their heads. Yes, some look happier than others, but many are simply needing their caffeine fix. Unfortunately, mental illness is one of those things that many people seem to think they need to hide from others and keep to themselves.

If you walk into the David E. Enarson building on campus, and make your way to the gymnasium, you will notice a blue bulletin board with a few handwritten messages on it. Included in these textmessage-shaped boxes are phrases such as “YOU ARE NOT ALONE,” “You were given life because you are strong enough to live it,” and “EXERCISE IS GOOD FOR MENTAL HEALTH!” Issues in mental health affects countless people, and athletes are no different.

January 31st was “Bell Let’s Talk” day, which is aimed at reducing the stigma towards mental illness in society. On “Let’s Talk” day each year, Bell donates five cents each time one of their “Let’s Talk” videos is viewed on social media, every time the hashtag #bellletstalk is used on Twitter, each text and phone call made, and each time one of their themed Snapchat filters or Facebook photo frames are used.

As a result of the initiative, Bell has donated over $86.5 million since 2011 (and added another $6.92 million to that total this year!) to help people battling mental health issues, through various programs focused on as-

sisting individuals, or paying for people to have access to individual help.

Mental illness is a massive issue in society today, and it is only amplified within the world of sport. Athletes are normal people that happen to be good at playing a sport. Just because they perform at an elite level on the field or court, does not mean that they have it all together beyond that. Yes, the poster claiming that exercise was beneficial for one’s mental health was correct, but sweating is not a panacea for mental health problems.

‘perfect,’ it can be the source of a lot of insecurity and shame.

It is so important to stress that having these struggles does not make you weak, but by acknowledging that there are so many other athletes fighting the same battles, we can come alongside each other.”

“I’d say it’s kind of a taboo topic within a competitive athletic environment, just because I think discussing it may be falsely perceived as a sign of weakness.

As athletes, we are told to embody traits such as strength, resilience, ultra-confidence and ruthlessness,” Spartan soccer player Aidan Moore said when I asked him about mental health within athletics.

Sports are not like your studies. You can fail a project or midterm and virtually keep it a secret from most people except the professor. As an athlete, your performance is constantly measured and the results are

“The constantly intense and aggressive environment in combination with the time-consuming lifestyle of being a student-athlete makes it hard for an athlete struggling with a mental illness, as they have to suppress the way they’re feeling in order to keep up.”

If you have ever been on a sports team, I am sure you can relate. Wanting to put on a brave front and acting like you have it all together because what is important in that context is simply on-field performance.

Spartan track and field athlete Sophie Pauls added: “What people might not understand is that with so much pressure in athletics to perform and be

can revolve mainly around our sport. It is easy to put significant amounts of pressure on ourselves and neglect the repercussions of that pressure.”

“As an athlete, I appreciate the willingness of others offering to talk, and show support. On the team, and off the team. We never know how others are doing unless we offer and present an environment of vulnerability and encouragement. I see a hockey team as a place where the guys have an opportunity to get to know one another, and present a space where each player can feel comfortable being real and seeking the help they might need.”

easily accessible f o r anyone who wants to know them. Of course these athletes are competitors, and want to do their best, but if their value is constantly measured by their athletic performance, it can seriously wear on an individual.

Spartan hockey player Lincoln Nikkel also added some input on the “Bell Let’s Talk” subject. “I see significant value in spreading awareness to athletes around the world. For many athletes, their lives

“vegans will rule everywhere north of the equator” – Nate Kara

This campus should be a safe space where people feel like they can share their mental health struggles. Some people just need someone to ask how they are really doing and have a caring, listening ear. Mental illness can be tricky to understand if you do not experience it much yourself. But, that does not mean you can just ignore it and simply tell people to get help and let the professionals deal with it.

Simply being there for someone who needs to talk about it can be more helpful than you know. If we can provide a safe environment where we can openly talk about our internal struggles and respond to each other with love, then we can truly connect with one another. Sophie called that being a “united team.”

17

THE ROAD TO THREE ROBBIE CARLSON Rome was not built in a day. Kobe did not become the G.O.A.T. overnight. Dwight Schrute did not become assistant to the regional manager after a week of working at Dunder Mifflin. Furthermore, the Spartans Men’s Volleyball team did not become back-to-back national champs without hard work. The men are 19-1 right now, possessing the best record in Canada. It has not always been smooth sailing for the Spartans this year though, as they suffered a tough loss to the well-seasoned, veteran packed, Brandon Bobcats squad.

As the Spartans trailed late in the fifth set, Spartans middle Pearce Eshenko recalls the lapse in concentration from the team. “Emotions were running high, and we were focused too heavily on the guys across the net rather than staying focused on our own game.” The loss left the Spartans in shambles, wondering what happened. The loss remains their only blemish on their near perfect

record. Since then, they have been on a journey of self-discovery, posting a 12 game win streak dating back to mid-November. The team has no intentions of slowing down as they approach some stiff competition in their closing regular season matches.

S e c o n d string setter, Maddux Greaves, when asked about the team dynamics this season, responded, “I really like the fellas this year.” He credits a lot of personal growth to the strong support his dorm has given him this semester.

The Spartans can attribute much of their success to rising stars such as Eric Loeppky, Jacob Kern, and Jesse Elser; who

SPARTAN STATS 68-54 W vs MacEwan (Feb. 3)

Needless to say, the men are anticipating another deep playoff push, as they look to threepeat as national champions, last accomplished when the Winnipeg Wesmen won four consecutively from 1971-74.

Discovery has been a theme for the Spartans men’s volleyball team this season, as they have come together and found their identity as a team.

They are comfortable with each other, even sporting matching mullets on (and off!) the court. Opposing teams have really struggled to contain a dynamic of-

fense that seems to shred defenses on a nightly basis. The combination of Eshenko’s block-read discipline, along with Loeppky and Jackson Howe’s lethal execution of the “40 bik,“ a play that leaves teams struggling to come up with any viable counter attack. Not to mention all you have to do is look down the Spartans’ bench to find Kaden Gamache and Maddox Greaves, one of the deadliest double-subs Canada West has seen in decades.

Come out and witness for yourself the red-hot Spartans as they face conference and crosstown rivals, the UBC Thunderbirds, on home court this Friday, Feb. 9th at 8 p.m.

Support your two graduating seniors Schreimer and Mark Antoniuk as they play their last regular season home game at the Langley Events Center.

Be a part of the best university sport atmosphere in the conference, and cheer on our Spartans.

Bring the noise. #weareallspartans

MEN’S BASKETBALL Recent 81-74 W vs TRU (Jan. 27) 97-88 W vs MacEwan (Feb. 2)

WOMEN’S BASKETBALL Recent

have been lights-out as of late, not to mention Adam Schreimer - who has his eyes on setting the Canada West alltime assists record in the coming weeks.

The Spartans finished the regular season with a 16-4 record. They have an upcoming bye week during which their first playoff opponent will be decided.

107-101 L vs MacEwan (Feb. 3)

MEN’S VOLLEYBALL The Spartans are 19-1 so far in the regular season, and are currently 1st in the Canada West standings.

They have clinched a playoff spot.

Recent 3-1 W vs Calgary (Feb. 3)

Upcoming

The Spartans finished the regular season with a 3-17 record, and unfortunately did not make the playoffs.

vs TBA (Feb. 15-18)

Upcoming

WOMEN’S VOLLEYBALL

vs UBC (8:00PM, Feb. 9) and at UBC (6:30PM, Feb. 10) at TRU (7:45PM, Feb. 16) and (6:45PM, Feb. 17)

Recent

The Spartans are 13-7 so far in the regular season, and are currently 4th in the Canada West standings.

3-2 L vs Calgary (Feb. 3)

Upcoming

Upcoming

WOMEN’S TRACK AND FIELD Triple Jump

Shannon, Noort, Smart, Konrad 3rd (9:44.71)

4 x 800m

Rachel Jerome - 3rd (7.85)

60m

Grace Konrad - 3rd (2:28.28)

400m

Claire Noort - 3rd (2:28.28) Jennifer Shannon - 9th (2:30.52

800m

Mikaela Smart - 7th (5:11.87)

Mile

Mowa Adeleye - 2nd (8.87)

60m Hurdles

Maryschuk, Pauls, Piercy, Konrad 8th (4:20.00)

Recent 5-3 L vs Simon Fraser (Feb. 3)

vs UBC (6:00PM, Feb. 9) and at UBC (5:00PM, Feb. 10) at TRU (6:00PM, Feb. 16) and (5:00PM, Feb. 17)

Mowa Adeleye - 5th (11.65m) Alleyah Hinds - 8th (11.27m)

MEN’S HOCKEY

The Spartans are 16-4 so far in the season , and 1st in the BCIHL.

vs Eastern Wash. (7:00PM, Feb. 9) at Aldergrove Comm. Arena MEN’S TRACK AND FIELD Maxime Leveille - 1st (4.90m) Nathan Dunford - 2nd (4.75m) David Boyd - 2nd (4.75m)

Pole Vault

Denzel Brown - 2nd (14.79m)

Triple Jump

Ben Tjernagel - 6th (24.03)

200m

Aidan Kits - 2nd (1:23.70)

600m

Marshall, Neufeld, Lam, de Jong 1st (7:50.07)

4 x 800m

Paul Buckingham - 7th (2:03.49)

800m

4 x 400m

Mile

Sophie Pauls - 6th (1.45m) Jamie Wiens - 7th (J1.45m) Katie Maryschuk - 7th (J1.45m)

James Lam - 1st (4:15.68) Levi Neufeld - 2nd (4:16.44) Adam Marshall - 6th (4:25.03)

High Jump

David Boyd - 7th (8.74)

60m Hurdles

Madison Evans - 3rd (J3.70m) Emma Li - 8th (J3.60M) Kirsten Dunford - 10th (J3.45m)

Pole Vault

Marshall, Lam, Neufeld, de Jong 2nd (3:29.11) Tjernagel, Buckingham, Gin, Kits 7th (3:35.29)

4 x 400m

Rachel Jerome - 1st (5.51m) Jordyn Piercy - 6th (5.12m)

Long Jump

Chris Weiss - 3rd (4339pts) Dominic Luccock - 5th (4203pts)

Heptathalon

Cougar Indoor (Feb. 2-3)

Cougar Indoor (Feb. 2-3)

Upcoming

Upcoming

Husky Classic (Seattle, Wa.) Feb. 9-10 UW Open (Seattle, Wa.) Feb. 11 Spartan Pole Vault Classic (David E. Enarson Gym) Feb. 17

Husky Classic (Seattle, Wa.) Feb. 9-10 UW Open (Seattle, Wa.) Feb. 11 Spartan Pole Vault Classic (David E. Enarson Gym) Feb. 17

“World War 3” – Joey Schweitzer

18 HUMOUR SABINE HENDERSON hendersonsabine@gmail.com ANDREW RICHMOND Link to article: www.sheknows.com/parenting/articles/845009/50-edgy-boy-names Are you concerned about fostering your unborn male children’s masculinity? Do you want their name to be the name of a hero? Are you scarred by the fact that your parents named you something unoriginal and unmasculine, and are consumed by the thought that you might unknowingly make the same mistake and condemn your children to the same fate? Fear not! Everyday hero Kim Grundy comes to the rescue with her article: 50 Edgy Boy Names That Are Just the Right Amount of Cool. In one quick read, your perspective of boy names will be totally shifted, and you will ascend into a new personal era of enlightenment.

Your future sons will be empowered, being given the gift of never needing to question their masculinity again.

DANICA STEENKAMP

JOEL’s

HOT TAKE

Grundy begins by saying “[a]dding an X or Z to a name instantly ups its cool factor.” While a bold statement like that may leave you skeptical of the article’s integrity, upon further reading it is revealed that not only does Grundy preach dogma, but those who do not follow under her benevolent guidance are effectively strangling any chance their future sons may have at achieving any hint of masculinity in their feeble bodies. Grundy provides the reader with several classic names containing the two sacred letters, such as Pax, Zaccai, and Blaze (for all you future parents who are avid medical marijuana users). She also recommends taking a common, sickly, decrepit name such as Simon and changing it to the name of a champion: Ximon. The possibilities are immeasurable. Soon the human race will be teeming with an elite class of hyper-masculine leaders with names that are worthy of them.

Be prepared for Zenxamin, Xebaztian, Branxon, and Jazon to lead our planet to a new dawn of the hyper-masculine world we crave as a society.

After such strong points and arguments, one might think that Grundy would slow the pace of her article and give the reader a chance to think about these revolutionary ideas. That is not the case with Kim Grundy, however. She quickly drives to her next set of names: destination names. What better way to bring out the masculinity and edginess in your child than to name him after “a place he’ll love to visit someday?” Grundy gives several strong examples of such names, including Egypt and Phoenix, but Grundy’s examples do not give the reader a glimpse into the immense potential of this category of name. Imagine how proud you will be as a parent when you move your son Trinity Western University into his first dorm room…imagine the wonder on Back Forty’s face as he takes his first steps into the wilderness of Trinity’s backyard. Imagine the pride you will experience as Fort Pub takes a sip of his first P49 Craft Lager.

Grundy has unlocked an entire world of potential with this set of names; parents are only limited by their imaginations when naming their future edgy boys.

Grundy’s already impeccable and informative article graces its readers with even more options for their children’s names. Give your child an allegorical name, naming him after a trait you hope he will possess someday. Kim Grundy suggests names such as Happy, Lucky, and Liberty, but there are also much edgier, more masculine options such as Self-Discipline, Faithfulness, or even Incredibly Attractive! She also suggests combining the names of you and your spouse, but use caution with this particular type of name. It is strongly discouraged for partners whose names are Freida and Chuck, Betty and Mitch, or Andrea and Ross.

The reader is bombarded with so many good ideas that employ the utmost of edgy that they may give up all hope and end up naming their future sons something dinky like Chad or Sam. Such is the tragedy of perfection in the world of edginess and masculinity.

ON IS WATER WET Over the past month or so, the question of whether water is wet or not has been making its way around the Instagrams and I’m writing to set the record straight. This may be appearing in the humour section, but believe you me, I’m dead serious about my grammar and don’t think for a minute that I’m fooling around when I say that water is not wet. Don’t challenge me on this; you’re asking for a fight.

[For context, Joel is pacing around the room right now, orating this article. Really fired up over here] Water makes things wet. Ask yourself – when have you ever described water as wet? That’s right. Never. The table may be wet because of a spill. The pavement might be wet because of rain. It is not a quality of water; rather, water imbues this quality onto other objects.

And yes, you are wet if you are in water.

The water is not wet, but you are wet, because water covers your skin. If you jump into a pool clothed, you will immediately declare your clothing as wet.

Oh yeah, and the swimming pool is not wet, though the walls of the swimming pool are.

[Joel doubles over, exhausted, but at ease. He knows that he is right]

[Joel punches a wall and lets out a warrior’s scream]

“I make Katrina pay for things for me because she gets to do laundry at my house for free” – Martin Garcia

19

WEEKLY POLL BROOKE PATTYN

This week, we polled the community and found out some pretty mediocre stuff. Do most people own Blundstones?

Turns out from the people surveyed, a majority do not own a pair of Blundstones even if it seems literally everyone on campus is wearing them.

But you’re probably thinking, “Seriously Mars’ Hill, Blundstones? Can you not come up with some more controversial topics like last year with the Community Covenant survey?” Of course we can! But you are a part of the process too. Mars’ Hill is a student newspaper so if the contributors that come forward do not present the content you would like to read about, we can’t publish it.

Trinity’s campus is known for its brand names and honestly, at first glance you would think people on campus are more concerned with the type of boots they’re wearing than actual issues that need to be discussed. The fact that someone thought these were good questions to poll the Trinity community with is sad.

It goes to show how superficial the people of our community can be and brings to light the shallowness of the campus and its members (I am not saying everyone on campus is superficial and shallow). I’m not going to quote

HOW MANY TIMES HAVE YOU BEEN ON A HIKE IN THE PAST YEAR?

scripture at you but seriously Trinity? You’re better than this. Since coming here, I’ve met some of the most judgemental and superficial people I have ever encountered. And I can tell you, that should not have been my impression of a CHRISTIAN campus. C’mon people. Pretty sure the brand of shoes you’re wearing is not all that important in the grand scheme of things.

Now you’re probably asking what the whole point of this blurb was. Well 1) it’s to call you all out on your shallow nature, have a heart and some common sense and start bringing up issues that matter to you, and 2) Have a problem with something we wrote about? Have an issue you think is worth discussing?

WRITE TO US. Write an article, write a letter to the editor.

Grow up and don’t just submit a dinky declassified. We want your serious feedback and we can’t take you seriously when it’s phrased as an immature declassified and ends with “lol”. Like really?

In short, figure out how to be less shallow, find a little bit of depth within your soul and share it with the world. Have a little heart and talk about things that actually matter and have nothing to do with what brand you have on your feet.

Because honestly, no one gives a flying f*** if you’re in on the latest trends with your overpriced sandals or boots.

(for at least an hour) 11+ 12.8% (22)

1-5 50.6% (87)

6-10 15.1% (26)

0 21.5% (37)

HOW MANY TIMES DO YOU VISIT FORT LANGLEY, ON AVERAGE, IN A WEEK? 4-7 2.9% (5)

7+ 2.3% (4)

I live in Fort Langley 4.7% (8)

1-3 65.5% (112)

0 24.6% (42)

DO YOU OWN A PAIR OF BLUNDSTONES? Yes 32.6% (56)

No 67.4% (116)

Have a problem with something we’ve published?

Want to respond to something someone’s written?

Comments? Questions? Criticisms?

SEND US A LETTER TO THE EDITOR AT MARSHILL@GMAIL.COM Your response letter may be published in the paper at our discretion.

You may choose to be published anonymously

Trinity Western University

SHUTTLE Sunday Mornings | Fall & Spring Semesters 11:30am pick up | 1:30pm drop off Mattson Building Traffic Circle lwchurch.ca “I’m actually straight” – Chase Moloney

Monica Sophia Rawlek Elizondo

ALEX’S ANNEX

Chavez Acuña Calderon

Year: Time is a social construct Age: See above

THE Height: At least 4 feet SHEVANGELIST Hometown: Williams Lake,

BC. But my citizenship is in heaven

Major: Philosophy (re: Answers to year and age) Favourite song?

“September” by Earth Wind and Fire Idea of a perfect date?

September 21, 2024 (The day I plan to get married and my first dance will be to “September” by Earth Wind and Fire) How would you win their parents over?

My dope rapping skills and my blue tracksuit

DE-CLASSIFIEDS

PA R T 2

#needhelp #inlovewithmyra #likeheadoverboots #iamgoinginsane #replysoon #didntknowiwasgay Reason #1625227 that it’s amazing to live on Northwest: no fire alarms waking you up in the middle of the night. Well rested nuns are the happiest ones.

Riddle me this; which came first, Mars’ Hill’s lowered standards or its immature articles?

Technically, Seal Kap was named after the little foil-plastic covering that went over the old, glass milk jugs of our grandparents’ era. The “seal kap” was apparently invented by the dairy farmer that once resided in this noble building. Seal Kap now houses the Religious Studies Department, and serves as the “Shekhinah” of God on campus. Enter ye with humility...

Maybe we should have two newspapers? One for and by upper class men and this one for childish freshmen... please?

Biggest deal breaker?

He doesn’t like The Greatest Showman

Do you know Daniel Erkau?

More like Daniel ErkWOW #therealreasontodoSBA

Good age to get married?

However old I’ll be on September 21, 2024

Is it just me or does Levi Friesen looks like Phineas and Nate Rhea looks like Ferb?

What skill will you pass on to your future children?

My dope rapping skills What type of animal represents you?

A 90’s Dad Your favourite band?

Earth Wind and Fire (specifically the song “September” if I haven’t made that point clear) What theme do you envision for your wedding?

Disco How do you plan to take family photos?

Google “awkward family photos pugs.” It’s the second result - just like that Top quality in a future mate?

He loves the Lord Jesus with all his heart (disco music too, but most importantly, Jesus) Favourite action movie?

The Mystery of Sleep documentary on Netflix

Linden, 18, men’s soccer, Land and food major (Anthropology), VERY SINGLE! P.s. Interested girls: he’s in the west coast collegium all the time @thomaskasteel margarine is better than butter Cal Townsend is fake news - Cal Townsend Just letting you know that I’m the guy who eats the end pieces of the bread at the caf. You’re welcome.

“Why I’ve Been Struggling With Christianity” lacks depth of its analysis of faith centred issues and reflects the “pop” theology culture of TWU well; that is to say, a lack of world experiences. #bubble DID ANYONE READ THE GOSH DARN TEXTBOOK??

LIKE SERIOUSLY, THE PROF IS LITERALLY TEACHING THE READING Cory Mcnulty! OH yea.... he’s cool. Definitely a really cool and interesting dude.

Did anyone else know ‘sophomore’ means ‘wise fool’? I think this explains a lot... #secondyear MH 16/17 polls: Serious inquiry into the nature and attitudes of the TWU community regarding controversial and hot-button items at play on campus MH 17/18 polls: How Many Pairs of Blundstones Do You Own? LOL my study break will be watching videos on youtube of otters doing cute things #motivation #entertainment

Favorite Bible verse?

“But I wish everyone were single, just as I am. Yet each person has a special gift from God, of one kind or another.”

(1 Corinthians 7:7)

Dirk + Katie #dirtie #goforcoffee

What does love mean to you?

His screen saver is the photo of the second result when googling “Awkward family photos pugs”

If your name is pronounced Kay-Leb and you inhabit the collegium.. you are fine #dancewithme

Favorite romantic movie?

The Greatest Showman because it’s the greatest show ever man (please note: the intentional pun)

Recently realized that our window is not a one way mirror; contemplating lifestyle adjustments such as not returning to the room to change after showering or maybe just closing the curtain.

I find it annoying how professors equate homework with employment; tuition and a pay cheque are to vastly different transactions Dirk DeWaal is a great catch, but doesn’t like to bite too often :( To whoever put a sticky note covered in ketchup on my door: Why?

“Nate Kara is my idol” – Paul Curtis