
Don’t rock the cradle
The grandparent learning curve
Don’t rock the cradle
The grandparent learning curve
Better online systems for older Kiwis A 20-20 guide to healthy vision Retirement Villages Act under review
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This issue of Plusliving examines the government’s slow-motion review of the 20-year-old Retirement Villages Act, which is bringing a range of elder rights issues into the spotlight.
We also delve into the science of anticipation, discussing how looking forward keeps you moving forward, and investigate grandparent etiquette, which is all about finding the balance between being helpful and overstepping boundaries.
You’ll find pieces on simple methods to relieve stress and restore a sense of calm, outdated apps and technology, and what you need to know about emergencies and money.
There’s also information on reconnecting through technology, eye health, the truth about turmeric, great recipes, good reads, mind games and much more.
Enjoy.
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Welcome to Plusliving – the magazine dedicated to living well and ageing gracefully in modern society. Aimed at the 50+ age group, you’ll find articles covering all aspects of contemporary life, including physical health and wellbeing, mental health and acuity, home life, working life and finances, technology, travel, self-improvement and more. Our aim is to provide information anyone can use, on any given day, so you can get more out of life.
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By Jamie Quinn
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By Ben O’Connell
Though the government’s slow review of the 20-year-old Retirement Villages Act is set to roll over to the next parliamentary term in 2027, its presence in the Beehive has brought cases of substandard elder rights and living conditions into the foreground.
The Ministry of Housing and Urban Development received more than 11,000 submissions when the review process began in August 2023. From them, three key areas were identified.
“These areas include updating the Act to bring it in line with sector best practice, strengthening transparency such as introducing a plain language version of the Code of Practice, and looking at changes to increase protections for residents, for example, restricting operators from passing on insurance excesses to residents if the damage was not their fault,” Associate Minister for Housing Tama Potaka says.
“The objectives of the review remain the same, including ensuring adequate consumer protection, balancing the rights and responsibilities of operators and residents, and ensuring the ongoing viability of the sector,” he says.
Under the Retirement Villages Code of Practice 2008, Metlifecare would be responsible for fixing the problem as it was initially caused by the concrete beyond the woman’s villa. In the end, the resident fought the charge. However, the operator only paid half the repair cost, and the resident reluctantly paid the rest.
“New Zealand’s population is ageing, and it’s essential we have a range of housing options available for older people,” Seniors Minister Casey Costello says.
“Retirement villages play an important role in this mix, and around two-thirds of them also provide aged care facilities, so we need to continue the review and to get it right.”
One such case is Rolleston’s Boulevard Village, which was the subject of media coverage by The Press and Stuff at the start of this year. The Retirement Village (RV) Residents Association supports 12,500 residents nationwide. It told media that it received more complaints about the Canterbury retirement village than any other entity, including major providers such as Ryman Healthcare.
Chief executive Nigel Matthews told Stuff that between April and September 2023, The Boulevard “had approximately 60 residents at the time, but had three times the average number of complaints. On a per head basis, they had approximately six times the number of formal complaints to the village complaint average.”
He says that complainant stories like those from The Boulevard are all too common. He says the current complaints process must change as it doesn’t give residents the ability to address their issues adequately and is unfairly weighted in the operator’s favour.
He shared his frustrations with Stuff that he keeps getting complaints about The Boulevard two years on. “It’s the lack of progress … and the repeated nature of the complaints which border on bullying, victimisation, harassment, breaches, privacy and a lack of a natural justice occurring."
Consumer NZ and the RV Residents Association are concerned retirement villages are ignoring Commerce Commission warnings about unfair resident contract terms and call for the ComCom to take further action. Following complaints, the ComCom warned village operators of potential Fair Trading Act breaches.
One potential case is retirement village operators charging residents for the maintenance and repairs of chattels or fixtures within their units despite residents not having ownership rights over their units.
“Even though residents don’t own the units, chattels or fixtures, they’re often responsible for the cost of maintenance, repairs and replacement of everything from heat pumps and blinds to light switches and power sockets,” Consumer NZ chief executive Jon Duffy says.
“We think that’s completely unfair. Responsibility for repairing, replacing and maintaining operator-owned fixtures and chattels should fall on the retirement village.”
Di Sinclair is RV Residents’ national vice president and complaints coordinator. She says the organisation receives ongoing complaints from Metlifecare residents about these bills.
Metlifecare currently owns and operates 43 retirement villages nationwide. “In one case, an elderly woman was charged $562 for a draft strip to close up a gap between her garage door and some uneven concrete outside.”
She says that under the Retirement Villages Code of Practice 2008, Metlifecare would be responsible for fixing the problem as it was initially caused by the concrete beyond the woman’s villa. In the end, the resident fought the charge. However, the operator only paid half the repair cost, and the resident reluctantly paid the rest.
“The operator must keep the building and equipment in good working order. A garage door, particularly one attached to a unit, is part of that obligation,” she says. “Residents are afraid of repercussions if they ‘make a fuss’, and they often feel they don’t have the emotional or physical strength to get into conflict with village management. It's not fair that they have to rely on advocates to enforce their rights,” she says.
The New Zealand Labour Party says the National Government is treading water on the review. “Timelines for review set by this Government are unacceptable and will leave residents in the lurch for years,” Labour seniors spokesperson Ingrid Leary says.
“Nearly all the background work has been done. Leaving any changes to the Act to the next parliamentary term will see many of the current residents passed on, time is on no one’s side. Delays will only benefit the operators, not the residents.”
RV Residents say progress is “pleasing but slow”. "As our population grows and ages, residents need to have choices, their assets need to be better protected, and the industry must be able to provide affordable options,” says Carol Shepherd of the RV Residents Council.
"Specifically, the Council is pleased the Government has decided to look at options for incentivising or requiring early capital repayments when residents move out of a village.
“This has been a big issue for residents. They quite rightly want their capital returned to them or their families quickly, and interest should be paid as well if the process takes too long.”
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By Jamie Quinn
Let’s talk about our eye health. It’s something we often take for granted until issues start cropping up. Just like the rest of our body, our eyes need care and attention to keep them functioning well.
Maintaining eye health is easier than you might think and crucial for ensuring a high quality of life. Regular eye checks are nonnegotiable. These checks assess your vision and can also catch early signs of conditions that could lead to vision loss, such as glaucoma, age-related macular degeneration, and cataracts.
But maintaining eye health isn’t just about seeing your optometrist regularly. It’s also about taking proactive steps at home and in your daily routine. For instance, if you’re glued to screens for most of the day, make sure to follow the 20-20-20 rule: every 20 minutes, look at something 20 feet away for at least 20 seconds. This simple habit helps reduce eye strain and fatigue.
What you eat matters when it comes to eye health. Nutrients like vitamin C, vitamin E, zinc, and omega-3 fatty acids are known for their eye health benefits. Foods rich in these nutrients can help ward off age-related vision problems. For example, leafy greens like spinach and kale, seafood such as salmon and tuna, and nuts, beans, and eggs are great choices to incorporate into your diet.
Let’s not forget about the mighty carrot. Rich in beta-carotene, a type of vitamin A, carrots can help maintain healthy vision. While eating carrots won’t give you night vision, the right amount of vitamin A ensures the proper functioning of the retina and other parts of the eye. Awareness of the warning signs that indicate potential eye health issues is crucial. Here are a few symptoms that should prompt a visit to your optometrist:
If you experience ongoing discomfort or pain in your eyes, don’t dismiss it. This could be a sign of infection or other serious conditions.
While sometimes it can be as harmless as fatigue or allergies, persistent redness could also indicate conjunctivitis or glaucoma.
Maintaining eye health is easier than you might think and crucial for ensuring a high quality of life. Regular eye checks are non-negotiable.
Any sudden or gradual change in your vision should be taken seriously. Blurred vision could be a symptom of a number of eye conditions, including macular degeneration.
Seeing floaters or flashes in your vision can be normal, but a sudden increase in these could signify a retinal detachment, which requires immediate medical attention.
If you find yourself suddenly squinting in moderate indoor light or sunlight, it could indicate an underlying eye issue.
Catching these signs early and consulting with a healthcare professional can mean the difference betweensimple treatment and significant intervention.
Taking care of your eyes might not always be at the top of your mind, but it’s as important as any other part of your health routine. Regular checks, proper nutrition, and being vigilant about warning signs are key to maintaining good eye health. So, when was your last eye exam? If you’re struggling to remember, it might be time to schedule one!
Hearing is more than just sound – it’s about our connection to the world around us.
It’s the laughter shared with family, the conversation over coffee with a friend, and the moments that bring us together. When hearing becomes difficult, those connections can fade, affecting relationships, confidence, and overall well-being.
At Lisa Keen Audiology, we believe hearing health is essential for living a vibrant, engaged life. As an independent, locally owned clinic, we provide truly personalised care – free from the influence of large multinational manufacturers or chains. This independence allows us to offer unbiased advice and access to a wide range of hearing aid brands and devices, ensuring the best solution for each individual.
Lisa Keen has over 30 years of audiology experience in both New Zealand and the United States, working in hospitals, ENT clinics, and private practices. Since 2008, she has called
Large multinational manufacturers and retailers own more than 80% of hearing clinics in New Zealand.1 We’re not one of them. Personalised, unbiased advice Choice of multiple brands Make an informed decision
1 www.consumer.org.nz/articles/the-high-cost-of-hearingloss-how-the-unregulated-audiology-industry-is-failing-kiwis
New Plymouth home, serving the local community with expert hearing care since opening her own clinic in 2015.
As we age, prioritising hearing health helps keep us socially active and mentally sharp. Research links untreated hearing loss to cognitive decline, isolation, and a reduced quality of life – but modern hearing solutions are more advanced and discreet than ever. With the right support, you can continue to enjoy the sounds that matter most.
If you have concerns about your hearing, take the first step today. Call (06) 757 8380 or visit keenaudiology.nz to book an appointment. Come hear what you’ve been missing.
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Stress and anxiety are common challenges in today’s fast-paced world, but there are several simple strategies that can help alleviate these feelings and restore a sense of calm.
One of the most straightforward ways to relax is through deep breathing exercises. By inhaling deeply through your nose, holding your breath for a few seconds, and then exhaling slowly through your mouth, you activate your body’s relaxation response. This helps lower your heart rate and eases tension, allowing you to regain composure in moments of stress.
In addition to deep breathing, physical activity can significantly reduce stress. Whether it's a brisk walk, yoga, or simple stretching, exercise is an excellent way to release pent-up tension.
When you engage in physical activity, your brain releases endorphins, the "feel-good" chemicals that improve mood and promote relaxation. Even a short burst of movement can provide a much-needed break from anxious thoughts and help clear your mind.
Mindfulness meditation is another powerful tool for managing anxiety. Taking just a few minutes each day to practice mindfulness can create a sense of peace in the midst of stress.
By focusing on your breathing and observing your thoughts without judgment, you allow yourself to step out of the cycle of anxious thinking and return to the present moment. This practice helps promote emotional balance and mental clarity, especially during challenging times.
Sometimes, simply talking to a friend or family member can also make a big difference. Social connections provide emotional support, reduce feelings of isolation, and help you gain perspective on stressful situations. Sharing your feelings can create a sense of relief and help you process your emotions in a healthy way.
Lastly, it’s important to consider your lifestyle choices. Limiting stimulants like excessive caffeine, alcohol, or nicotine can reduce feelings of restlessness and anxiety.
‘Taking care of yourself,’ information sourced from the New Zealand College of Clinical Psychologists
These substances can heighten stress, so moderating your intake can help you maintain a more balanced mood throughout the day.
By incorporating some simple techniques into your routine, you can develop healthier ways to manage stress and anxiety, allowing for a greater sense of calm and well-being in your daily life.
Routines – ‘Familiarity is comforting'
• Keep your normal activities
• Treasure familiar things
Stay connected - 'We need each other'
• Stay in touch with family and friends
• Take moments to give others your full attention
• Listen to and answer children's questions simply
• Be brave for each other
• Ask for and accept help
Save your energy - 'Keep it for important things'
• Lower expectations of yourself and others
• Take breaks and lighten your workload
• Be tolerant of yourself and others
• Lots of things can wait
• Children may act younger – that’s OK for awhile
Lifestyle - 'Balance is healthy'
• Stay active, e.g. go for a walk
• Relax – take a break
• Limit alcohol
• Try to get enough sleep
• Try to eat well
• Do something nice for yourself
Safety - 'Protect yourself in every way'
• Limit exposure to earthquake news
• You are not helpless - remember the things you do well
• Take care of your spiritual and emotional health
• It is OK to be emotional
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By Ben O’Connell
It’s the yellow-orange spice that could. Turmeric has been used for thousands of years and is revered in some online wellness communities, but there is a concerning amount of misinformation surrounding the spice. So, what is the truth about turmeric?
To cut to the chase, more research is needed to determine its long-term medical benefits. Turmeric is widely promoted for its potential health benefits, including reduced inflammation, alleviated joint pain, and support for brain function. Although some studies point to positive effects, the research overall remains inconclusive.
Turmeric’s active compound is curcumin. It has poor natural absorption, so without proper formulation, it is excreted and unused by the body. To enhance absorption, it is commonly paired with black pepper, which contains piperine —a compound that slows down the breakdown of curcumin. Fat also aids in dissolving curcumin, helping it reach the bloodstream, which is why traditional cooking methods often use turmeric with oil.
Many studies focus on high doses of isolated curcumin rather than whole turmeric, making its effectiveness in a regular diet unclear. Researchers remain sceptical because past studies have only tested on cell tissue or animals, never humans. Its popularity in traditional medicine, particularly in Ayurveda and Chinese medicine, is not entirely backed by modern science.
Those interested in turmeric lattes and supplements should exercise caution, as the composition of these products can vary.
Some commercial turmeric powders contain heavy metals, such as lead, or artificial dyes to enhance their colour. Others may be bulked up with fillers like cassava starch or rye flour, which can be problematic for those with gluten sensitivities. Some supplements focus solely on curcumin, some don’t. Whole turmeric provides a broader range of active ingredients, while curcumin extracts isolate just one.
Though turmeric is generally safe when consumed in food, high doses from supplements can cause digestive issues such as nausea, bloating, and diarrhoea. Some people may also experience headaches or dizziness. Curcumin can interact with certain medications, including blood thinners, diabetes medications, and some chemotherapy treatments. Pregnant women and those with gallbladder disease should seek medical advice before taking turmeric supplements. As with any natural product, caution is necessary, as natural does not always mean risk-free.
There’s no harm in using turmeric as most of us do. Turmeric’s earthy, slightly spicy flavour makes it a versatile ingredient beyond curries. It can be added to smoothies, scrambled eggs, or brewed into turmeric tea. Golden milk, a warm drink made with turmeric, milk, and spices, is a popular option. Fermented turmeric products, including probiotic drinks, are gaining popularity for their benefits to digestive health.
Ultimately, turmeric offers potential benefits, particularly as an anti-inflammatory agent, but scientific findings remain mixed. No official guidelines have been established, and challenges related to absorption persist in pharmaceutical applications. If you enjoy its flavour, incorporating it into meals can be a nutritious addition. However, for significant medical benefits, it is essential to stay informed, consult healthcare professionals when necessary, and incorporate turmeric into a balanced diet.
Many studies focus on high doses of isolated curcumin rather than whole turmeric, making its effectiveness in a regular diet unclear.
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Serves 10
By Jamie Quinn
Chicken rissoles made in the air fryer are crispy on the outside, tender inside, and lower in fat—plus, they’re delicious.
With hidden zucchini and cheesy flavour, they’re sure to become a family favourite, perfect for days when pan-frying feels like a chore.
Ingredients
• 500g chicken mince
• ½ cup Panko breadcrumbs
• ½ cup grated parmesan
• 3 shallots, finely chopped
• 2 garlic cloves, minced
• 1 egg, beaten
• 1 zucchini, grated
• Honey mustard sauce for serving
Serves 4
This vibrant broccoli slaw combines crisp veggies, crunchy almonds, and sweet cranberries for a deliciously fresh side dish.
Method
1. Combine mince, breadcrumbs, parmesan, shallot, garlic and egg in a large bowl. Squeeze excess liquid from the zucchini and add to the bowl. Season with salt and pepper to taste, and mix until well combined.
2. Shape 1/4 cup of the mixture into ten balls. Place them on a lightly oiled tray and gently press them into rounds.
3. Spray the rissoles and air fryer basket with oil. Cook at 180°C for 10 minutes or until golden and cooked through.
Serving suggestion: Serve with honey mustard sauce and sides of your choice. Enjoy!
Ingredients
• 3 cups broccoli stems, julienned
• 2 cups broccoli florets
• 1 cup carrots, julienned
• 1 cup red cabbage, thinly sliced
• ¼ cup red onion, thinly sliced
• ½ cup toasted sliced almonds
• 1/3 cup dried cranberries
• 1 cup coleslaw dressing
Method
1. In a large bowl, mix the broccoli stems, florets, carrots, cabbage, onion, almonds, and cranberries.
2. Drizzle with ¾ of the dressing and toss until evenly coated, adding more dressing if needed.
Serving suggestion: Top with more almonds and cranberries, then serve. Enjoy!
Serves 4
This creamy mushroom risotto is a comforting, flavourful dish made with savoury mushrooms and a touch of parmesan.
Simple yet elegant, it’s the perfect recipe for a cosy dinner or a special occasion.
• 8 cups chicken or vegetable broth
• 1 tbsp extra virgin olive oil
• 1 onion, chopped
• 2 garlic cloves, minced
• 500g white mushrooms, sliced
• 1 tsp fresh thyme
• 2 cups arborio rice
• ½ cup white wine
• 1 cup parmesan, grated
• 2 tbsp fresh parsley, chopped
1. In a medium saucepan, bring chicken broth to a simmer over medium heat, then reduce to low.
2. In a large pot, heat oil over medium heat. Sauté the onion, stirring often, until translucent. Add one tablespoon of butter garlic, mushrooms, and thyme. Cook until mushrooms are soft and golden; season with salt and pepper to taste. Remove the mixture from the pot.
3. Melt the remaining tablespoon of butter in the pot and add the arborio rice, stirring quickly to coat. Cook for about 2 minutes until the rice smells slightly toasty, then stir in the wine and cook until mostly absorbed.
4. Add 1 cup of hot broth with a ladle, stirring often until the liquid is mostly absorbed. Continue adding the broth, 1 cup at a time, allowing the rice to absorb each addition before adding more. Stir frequently, cooking until the risotto is creamy and al dente (you may not need all the broth).
5. Return the mushroom mixture to the pot with the risotto.
6. Stir in parmesan cheese, then garnish with parsley.
Serving suggestion: Serve hot Enjoy!
Serves 1
This quick
and easy microwave mug cake
is the perfect single-serve treat for chocolate lovers
.
Ready in just minutes, it’s rich, fluffy, and delicious!
• 4 tbsp self-raising flour
• 4 tbsp caster sugar
• 2 tbsp cocoa powder
• 1 egg
• 3 tbsp milk
• 3 tbsp vegetable oil
• ¼ tsp vanilla essence
• 2 tbsp chocolate chips
1. Combine self-raising flour, caster sugar, and cocoa powder in a large mug to prevent overflowing in the microwave. Mix well.
2. Add the egg and mix in as well as possible.
3. Add milk, oil and vanilla essence, mix until smooth, then fold in chocolate chips.
4. Place the mug in the centre of the microwave and cook on high for 1½–2 minutes, or until the cake has risen and feels firm to the touch.
Serving suggestion:
Allow to cool for a minute before adding your favourite toppings (optional). Enjoy!
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The Ockham New Zealand Book Awards are the nation’s premier literary honours for books written by Kiwis. These are some of the books that took out the top spots in 2024.
Lioness by Emily Perkins
JANN MEDLICOTT ACORN PRIZE FOR FICTION
From humble beginnings, Therese has let herself grow used to a life of luxury after marrying into an empire-building family. But when rumours of corruption gather around her husband's latest development, the social opprobrium is shocking, the fallout swift, and Therese begins to look at her privileged and insular world with new eyes.
by Grace Yee Chinese Fish
MARY AND PETER BIGGS AWARD FOR POETRY
Chinese Fish is a family saga that spans the 1960s through to the 1980s. Narrated in multiple voices and laced with archival fragments and scholarly interjections, it offers an intimate glimpse into the lives of women and girls in a community that has historically been characterised as both a ‘yellow peril’ menace and an exotic ‘model minority’.
Don Binney: Flight Path by Gregory O’Brien
BOOKSELLERS AOTEAROA AWARD FOR ILLUSTRATED NON-FICTION
A richly illustrated account of the life and work of one of New Zealand’s most iconic artists: painter, printmaker, teacher, writer and ornithologist, Don Binney (1940–2012), a mercurial presence on the New Zealand cultural scene from the time of his meteoric rise to fame in the early 1960s.
by Damon Salesa An Indigenous Ocean: Pacific Essays
GENERAL NON-FICTION AWARD
Histories of our Pacific world are richly rendered in these essays by Damon Salesa. From the first Indigenous civilisations that flourished in Oceania to the colonial encounters of the nineteenth century, and on to the complex contemporary relationships between New Zealand and the Pacific, Salesa offers new perspectives on this vast ocean – its people, its cultures, its pasts and its future.
Te Rautakitahi o Tuhoe ki Orakau by Tā Pou Temara (Ngāi Tūhoe)
MŪRAU O TE TUHI – MĀORI LANGUAGE AWARD
Te Rautakitahi o Tūhoe ki Ōrākau is an account of Tūhoe involvement in the battle of Ōrākau in the New Zealand wars by Sir William Te Rangiua ‘Pou’ Temara. Written in te reo Māori and based on oral sources, Tā Pou asks the big questions about the Tūhoe men and women who went to fight with Ngāti Maniapoto at Ōrākau. Who were they? Why did they go and what did they do there? What was the nature of their alliance with Ngāti Maniapoto?
By Jamie Quinn
Becoming
a
grandparent is one of life’s greatest joys, but it also comes with a learning curve.
While your excitement and love for the new baby are endless, there’s a fine balance to strike between being helpful and overstepping boundaries. Grandparent etiquette is about respecting the parents’ wishes, offering support without taking over, and being mindful of the new family dynamic.
One of the most important things to remember is that this isn’t your baby, and this experience isn’t about you. It may sound obvious, but the temptation to offer unsolicited advice or revert to the way things were done when you raised your own children can be strong. Parenting trends, medical advice, and societal expectations have changed over the years, and it’s important to respect the choices the parents make for their child. If they ask for your input, share it in a gentle, supportive and non-judgmental way, but try not to take it personally if they choose a different approach.
One of the most important things to remember is that this isn’t your baby, and this experience isn’t about you. It may sound obvious, but the temptation to offer unsolicited advice or revert to the way things were done when you raised your own children can be strong.
Parenting trends, medical advice, and societal expectations have changed over the years, and it’s important to respect the choices the parents make for their child. If they ask for your input, share it in a gentle, supportive and non-judgmental way, but try not to take it personally if they choose a different approach.
Visiting the new baby is an exciting moment, but timing and consideration matter. While you may want to rush to the hospital or the new parents’ home the minute the baby is born, it’s important to follow their lead. Some parents may welcome visitors right away, while others might need time to rest and adjust.
Some things to consider before visiting:
• The new mother is still recovering from giving birth and needs to rest and recover
• The new mother might want privacy as she tries to establish breastfeeding. This can be a very difficult, painful and vulnerable time for some new mothers
• The new parents may want privacy as they get settled with the baby and get used to caring for their newborn
• The new parents might be concerned about visitors bringing germs.
Always ask before dropping by, and be understanding if they say no. This is not a personal attack, this is a decision the new parents have made for their new baby and for themselves. When you do visit, keep it short and be mindful of their energy levels. Newborns are exhausting, and even the most well-intentioned guests can be overwhelming.
Holding the baby is a special experience, but be patient and wait for an invitation. Parents may be nervous about germs, overstimulation, or simply need more time to settle into their new routine. If you do get the opportunity to hold your grandchild, make sure your hands are clean, avoid wearing strong fragrances, and pay attention to any cues from the baby or parents that it’s time to hand them back.
Respecting the parents’ choices is crucial. Whether it’s about feeding, sleep schedules, or vaccinations, it’s their turn to make the decisions. If they choose to breastfeed, avoid making comments about bottle feeding. If they have specific sleep routines, honour them instead of suggesting alternatives. Even if you did things differently, refrain from saying, “Well, in my day…” as it can come across as dismissive. Instead, try saying, “I love seeing how you’re raising them,” which acknowledges their parenting efforts while keeping the conversation positive.
Offering help can be a game-changer for new parents, but how you offer it matters. Rather than insisting on taking over baby duties, focus on practical tasks that lighten their load. Doing the dishes, cooking a meal, folding laundry, or running errands can be more helpful than holding the baby while exhausted parents do chores. A simple “What can I do to help?” goes a long way, and respecting their answer—whether they accept or decline—shows that you genuinely care about their needs.
Social media is another area where grandparent etiquette is essential. The excitement of welcoming a new grandchild can make it tempting to share photos and updates, but always get the parent’s permission first. Some families prefer to keep their baby’s life private, while others have specific rules about when and how photos can be shared. A quick text to check before posting ensures that you’re respecting their boundaries.
Gifts are a wonderful way to express your love, but be mindful of the parents’ preferences. Some may appreciate gifts like diapers, onesies, or baby gear, while others might have a specific registry they’d like you to follow.
Oversized stuffed animals or extravagant items may not always be welcome, so checking in before purchasing ensures your gift is truly appreciated. If they have a minimalist approach, consider more practical gifts, such as contributing to a savings account or offering a meal service.
One of the most valuable things you can give is emotional support. Parenting is overwhelming, and a kind word, encouragement, or simply listening without judgment can make a huge difference. If the parents are struggling, reassure them that they’re doing a great job. If they need space, give it to them without taking it personally. Your role is to be a source of comfort and reassurance, not stress.
Boundaries work both ways, and it’s okay to set your own as well. If you feel like you’re being asked to babysit more than you can handle or if there are family dynamics that feel overwhelming, communicate openly and kindly. Being a grandparent is an honour, not an obligation, nor is it an entitlement. Honest and respectful conversations with the parents help create a healthy and positive relationship for everyone.
As the baby grows, your role will evolve. There will be new milestones, new challenges, and new opportunities to bond. Being adaptable, respectful, and loving is what truly makes a grandparent invaluable. By creating a relationship that is built on trust, respect, and, most importantly, love, you can hope to be in your grandchild's life to watch them grow and thrive.
One of the most valuable things you can give is emotional support. Parenting is overwhelming, and a kind word, encouragement, or simply listening without judgment can make a huge difference.
By Jamie Quinn
Do you have shoe boxes full of photos and family memories collecting dust in the garage? Scrapbooking could be your answer to free up storage space and beautifully preserve your precious memories. It’s a fun and creative way to combine crafts and memory-keeping.
Here’s a step-by-step guide to help you get started.
Scrapbook album: Choose an album size that suits your project, the most common sizes are 12x12 inches or 8.5x11 inches. Albums with protective sleeves will help preserve your work.
Paper: Stock up on acid-free papers to avoid damaging your photos over time. These come in countless colours and patterns.
Adhesives: Use photo-safe adhesives like glue dots, double-sided tape, or photo corners to secure your items without damaging them.
Scissors and trimmers: Precision cutting tools are essential for shaping and sizing your materials.
Pens and markers: Acid-free pens or markers are perfect for adding handwritten notes or embellishments.
Embellishments: These can include stickers, buttons, ribbons, stamps, and more to decorate your pages.
Gather the photos and items you want to include in your scrapbook. It helps to organise them chronologically or thematically, depending on your chosen theme. Remember, not every photo needs to be included—select those that best tell your story.
Before you start glueing things down, lay out your pages loosely to get a feel for the design. Arrange your photos and embellishments on the page without adhering them to experiment with different
layouts. Think about balance and composition and how you can use papers and decorations to frame and highlight your photos.
Once you’re happy with a layout, start glueing down your elements. Work one page at a time to maintain focus and coherence. Add decorative papers as backgrounds, then layer photos and embellishments. Use pens to add captions, dates, or anecdotes that give more context to your photos.
This is where you can really personalise your scrapbook. Use embellishments sparingly to enhance your story without overwhelming your photos. Stickers, die-cuts, ribbons, and other decorative items can add texture and interest to your pages.
Keep it simple: Especially when you're starting, it's easy to get overwhelmed by the possibilities. Focus on the basics and expand your techniques as you grow more comfortable.
Document the details: Don’t forget to write down the stories behind the photos. These annotations will be invaluable to anyone looking through the scrapbooks later on.
Enjoy the process: Scrapbooking is not just about the end product but also about enjoying the creative process.
Take your time and savour the act of preserving your memories!
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Many
financial experts advise paying off your mortgage as quickly as possible. If you have extra income or savings,
you'll often hear the same advice—reduce your mortgage. In theory, this is sound guidance.
But what about building an emergency fund? There are strong reasons for this, and too often it’s overlooked in New Zealand. Having an emergency fund allows you to weather financial crises or tough situations, keeping creditors, like banks, at bay.
Borrowing money is easy when times are good, but nearly impossible during difficult times, such as if you lose your job, are unable to work, or fall ill. As the saying goes: “A bank is an institution that lends you an umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back when it starts raining.”
For these reasons, building an emergency fund is a smart move.
We protect ourselves from various risks through insurance—life, fire, and general policies—but insurance premiums are often "dead" money that doesn’t offer returns. Additionally, insurances don’t always cover the specific emergencies that arise. On the other hand, an emergency fund is an asset. Even if you never need to use it, the money remains yours.
A general rule of thumb is to have three to six months' worth of income. But the key is not to overcomplicate it. Any amount is better than none. Starting is the most important step.
Borrowing money is easy when times are good, but nearly impossible during difficult times, such as if you lose your job, are unable to work,
An emergency fund must be liquid—it needs to be easily accessible. There’s little use in having an emergency fund if you can’t access it quickly, ideally within two weeks.
If your cash flow allows, set up an automatic payment to contribute to the fund monthly. Alternatively, include contributions in your cash flow planning. As always, balance between repaying debt and meeting everyday expenses is crucial.
Don’t keep your emergency fund in the same bank where you have your mortgage. If you miss a payment, the bank could transfer funds between your accounts without your consent. Avoid locking the money in illiquid assets, like rental properties, beach houses, or commercial buildings, as it could take months or even years to access those funds. It’s also unwise to invest it all in shares, since the market might be down when you need the money. None of these assets are suitable for an emergency fund.
Ideally, you’ll never need to dip into your emergency fund, so it should be invested conservatively. A diversified, low-risk portfolio, including a portion of overseas investments, is a good choice. This way, the fund can grow over time and, if unused, contribute to your retirement savings.
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Colin Bogue
ï 022 136 4931
¾ PO Box 372 Hawera 4640
º colin@futurelife4u.co.nz
Ô www.futurelife4u.co.nz
In 2022, Matariki was officially recognised as a public holiday in New Zealand, marking the first time an Indigenous celebration was acknowledged nationwide this way. The holiday is observed on Fridays closest to the Tangaroa lunar phase, usually falling between late June and mid-July; this year, it is the 20th of June.
Matariki is the Māori name for the cluster of stars also known internationally as Pleiades. Its rising in the middle of winter –usually around late June or early July – signals the beginning of the Māori lunar new year. For many iwi, (tribes), the appearance of Matariki in the pre-dawn sky marks a time to acknowledge those who have passed away in the previous year, to give thanks for the harvest, and to look forward to the promise of the year ahead.
One of the deeper aspects of Matariki is its role as a time of remembrance. It is a time to mourn and honour loved ones who have passed, to talk about them, and to release their spirits to the stars. This reflection is woven into many whanau and community events held across the country, often incorporating waiata (songs), karakia (prayers), and telling stories.
In 2022, Matariki was officially recognised as a public holiday in New Zealand, marking the first time an Indigenous celebration was acknowledged nationwide this way.
Matariki is also a celebration of life and togetherness. Whanau gather to share kai (food), stories, and time with each other. Food plays a big part in Matariki gatherings, especially traditional food such as a hangi.
Celebrating the present through connection and kai
Matariki is also a celebration of life and togetherness. Whānau gather to share kai, (food), stories, and time with each other. Food plays a big part in Matariki gatherings, especially traditional food such as a hangi. These meals are about gratitude – acknowledging the harvest, the earth’s generosity, and the people who help sustain us.
Events, fireworks, light shows, cultural performances, and school activities now also mark the season, mixing traditional customs with modern celebrations. The public holiday has helped reinforce the importance of Māori culture and the recognition of indigenous knowledge in our national identity.
Matariki is also a time for goal-setting, renewal, and hope. As the stars return to the sky, so does the opportunity to make plans, set intentions, and look forward to the future. In many traditions, the brightness and clarity of the Matariki stars were read to forecast the year, guiding planting, hunting, and fishing.
Matariki, the Māori New Year, is a uniquely Aotearoa celebration that brings together memory, reflection, celebration, and hope. Traditionally marked by the reappearance of the Matariki star cluster in the winter sky, the holiday gives all New Zealanders the opportunity – Māori and non-Māori alike – to pause, honour the past, celebrate the present, and plan for the future.
Retirement can be seen as the finish line – an end to the daily grind and the start of some well-earned free time and rest. But the truth is, retirement isn’t only about what you’re leaving behind, but also what lies ahead. Having things to look forward to can make all the difference in how fulfilling, healthy, and happy you will feel moving into this new period.
After decades of routine and structure, moving into retirement can feel a bit like stepping into the unknown. While the freedom and flexibility are certainly perks, they can also perhaps leave a bit of a void. This is where the power of anticipation comes in. Whether it is a weekly coffee with friends, an international holiday, a volunteer role, or even a class to learn a new hobby, having something on the calendar can give a sense of structure and purpose.
Studies show that people who regularly look forward to events or experiences tend to have better mental health and a more optimistic outlook on life. A 2016 study published in Emotion (an American Psychological Association Journal) found that anticipating positive events can activate the same neural circuits linked to happiness as the actual experience itself. In other words, just looking forward to something enjoyable can boost your mood and reduce stress levels.
Social scientist Dan Buettner’s Blue Zones research, studying the world’s longest-living people, also found similar results. In communities where residents often live past the age of 100, such as Okinawa in Japan, older adults often refer to “ikigai,” a Japanese concept meaning “a reason to get up in the morning.”
This sense of purpose often revolves around planning for future events, social get-togethers or meaningful tasks, highlighting the life-extending power of positive anticipation.
Retirement opens the door to rediscovering old passions or learning new ones. From painting to tennis, gardening to geography, there are endless opportunities to grow, learn, and connect. These don’t just have to be leisure activities – they can also be opportunities to open yourself up to new communities, mental stimulation and self-expression. Planning trips, joining clubs or groups, or even having annual goals can help with motivation.
Retirement can be seen as the finish line – an end to the daily grind and the start of some well-earned free time and rest.
But the truth is, retirement isn’t only about what you’re leaving behind, but also what lies ahead.
Social interaction plays a massive role, too. Setting up regular catch-ups with family, neighbours, or new friends helps keep you grounded and stops the feeling of loneliness, a known risk factor for cognitive decline and physical health problems. Having shared plans helps strengthen those social bonds, keeping the mind and heart engaged.
Retirement shouldn’t be more than just an end; it should also be the start of a new, exciting period of your life. A time to take control of your time, fill your days with things and people you love, and build a new life that is rich in experiences and connection. Having things to look forward to adds colour and share to the weeks and months ahead, making each day feel not only full but purposeful.
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The old saying ‘use it or lose it’ applies as equally to mental acuity as it does to physical wellbeing, and more so as we age.
With people progressively living longer lives, it is increasingly important to look after our mental health.
So here are some activities for the mind… brain food for improving your state of mind.
ANSWERS:
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As more everyday tasks – from booking appointments to banking – go digital, a large part of the population is being left behind.
For many older adults, technology has great potential: the ability to connect with family, access services more easily, and stay independent for longer.
A PhD researcher at the University of Auckland’s Centre for CoCreated Ageing Research, Melanie Stowell is working to develop better systems – ones that are accessible, empathetic, and empowering for older users.
Originally from the US, Stowell came to New Zealand two years ago to take up a fellowship. Her work in testing sensor technology for younger people that detects anxiety and offering support made her curious about other population groups, like older people who might benefit from similar technologies.
Her research recently profiled in Scoop, aims to find how technology can be developed to better meet the needs of older generations, so it becomes a useful tool for improving mental health, rather than causing them distress and isolation.
“We generally under-estimate the importance of considering older people when we develop new technologies.”
Stowell’s project involves interviews with older people, all who engage with technology and their experiences. Some are relatively comfortable with smartphones, email, and online services. But most are struggling to keep up with ongoing updates and changes, and even those who feel capable are frustrated.
This is a recurring issue Stowell hears in her research. It is not that older adults are incapable of using technology, but they are actually often skilled in using technologies like fax machines and analogue phones that younger generations don’t know how to use.
Apps and technological systems are constantly changing and evolving with updates. These shifts may seem minor to some, but for someone who spent weeks learning how to work their life online, even small changes can knock their confidence.
The language of digital platforms can also be a roadblock. Many systems use tech jargon or overly complex instructions, leaving some users confused or worried about making a costly mistake. This can make people hesitant to engage further.
Ironically, many tools are designed to make life easier, but can unintentionally make it harder for older people to stay connected. Online banking, e-prescriptions, and booking systems have replaced physical alternatives in many places.
“Online banking is stressful for some older people and there are not many store-front banks they can go to anymore” Stowell says. “That’s one example where going online is often a requirement, not an option, and we need to keep in mind the people who are locked out when it happens.”
For those who struggle with digital access or literacy, this means losing access to basic services or having to rely on others for help.
This growing digital dependence is particularly hard for people who are living alone or individuals with cognitive or physical impairments. Stowell’s research reveals that these shifts are creating a type of digital exclusion that puts already vulnerable people at greater risk of isolation, “and the longer people are in retirement, the less confident and comfortable they seem to feel.”
Many older adults say they’d be more willing to use new technologies if they had someone to walk them through the process slowly, step-by-step. However, with companies
PhD researcher at the University of Auckland’s Centre for Co-Created Ageing Research, Melanie Stowell is working to develop better systems –ones that are accessible, empathetic, and empowering for older users.
increasingly moving to online-only help desks and chatbots, that vital human connection is disappearing.
“They don’t want a chatbot,” Stowell explains. “They want to talk to someone and work through it together.”
This preference isn’t about ease – it’s also about confidence. Knowing that support is available and feeling respected while learning can make a real difference.
Another barrier to digital engagement is fear, specifically the fear of being scammed. Stowell says themes emerging from her research so far include widespread concerns about scams, feeling excluded from social media platforms that they originally thought promised connection, and the desire for in-person tech support.
Local initiatives like Digital Seniors are already making a difference. Launched in the Wairarapa and having expanded across the country, Digital Seniors offers personalised, community-based coaching for older adults.
“I have observed the work being done at Digital Seniors, which teaches older people how to use technology, and the right support makes all the difference.”
The programme offers one-on-one coaching and has weekly social learning spaces in places such as libraries and community
halls. Whether it is learning to set up a phone, use Zoom, pay a bill online, or send an email, Digital Seniors creates a safe space for learning.
“All it takes sometimes is someone patient and willing to take them through the steps, rather than doing it for them, which sends the message the person might not be capable.”
New Zealand’s ageing population is growing fast. Stats NZ has reported that the number of people aged 65 years or older living is likely to hit one million by 2028, with this number continuing to increase over the next 50 years.
Creating user-friendly systems and supporting community-based learning are key parts of the solution. But maybe the biggest shift needs to happen in how we think about ageing and tech. Older adults are not incapable; they are learners, contributors, users, and innovators in their own right.
The rapid pace of technological advancements means that tools and apps we once thought indispensable are now being replaced with newer, more integrated solutions.
From navigation and photo editing to fitness tracking and shopping, recent innovations are making our digital lives more seamless and efficient.
As technology continues to evolve, we can only imagine what the next wave of advancements will bring and which current apps and tools will soon be obsolete. The key takeaway? Stay adaptable, embrace new technologies, and enjoy the convenience they bring.
From messaging apps to navigation services, here’s a look at some of the more recent changes in the tech world, focusing on apps and services that have been replaced or significantly improved in just a few short years.
Not long ago, standalone GPS devices like Garmin and TomTom were the go-to solutions for in-car navigation. But with the rise of smartphones, apps like Google Maps and Waze took over, offering not only turn-by-turn directions but also real-time traffic updates, alternate routes, and even crowd-sourced data on road conditions. Today, physical GPS devices have become largely obsolete, and smartphones equipped with these apps have become the standard.
Photo editing apps like Snapseed, VSCO, and Adobe Lightroom were once essential tools for improving images before sharing them on social media. But with the rise of AI-powered filters and editing tools within platforms like Instagram, TikTok, and even Snapchat, the need for third-party photo editing apps has diminished. These social media platforms now provide advanced photo manipulation tools that are intuitive, quick, and integrated directly into the app experience.
In the past, ride-hailing apps like Uber and Lyft revolutionized the way we travelled. But in recent years, many cities have integrated ride-hailing with other forms of transportation, such as scooters, bikes, and even public transit. Apps like Uber and Lyft have evolved to include all-in-one transportation options, with users now able to book not only a ride but also a scooter or bike for short trips.
In the early 2010s, apps like WhatsApp, Facebook Messenger, and Skype dominated messaging, providing quick and easy communication for users worldwide. But today, apps like Slack and Microsoft Teams are overtaking traditional messaging platforms, particularly in the professional and collaborative workspaces. These all-in-one platforms combine instant messaging, video calls, file sharing, and project management tools in one space, making them indispensable for both businesses and individuals who need more than just a messaging app. For personal communication, messaging apps are now being integrated with social networks and other services, further reducing the need for standalone messaging platforms.
Fitness apps like MyFitnessPal and RunKeeper were once the go-to for tracking workouts, meals, and overall fitness goals. However, modern smartphones now offer built-in fitness tracking and health apps like Apple Health and Google Fit. These apps integrate seamlessly with wearable devices, such as the Apple Watch or Fitbit, to provide a comprehensive look at your daily activity, health metrics, and progress without the need for third-party fitness apps.
While apps like eBay, Amazon, and Walmart were once essential for shopping online, the integration of shopping features into social media apps has changed the game. Platforms like Instagram and Facebook now offer native shopping experiences, where users can purchase products directly from posts and ads. The growing trend of “social commerce” has made it easier for brands and retailers to connect with customers, bypassing the need for standalone shopping apps.
Music streaming apps like Pandora, Spotify, and Apple Music were once the go-to platforms for discovering and listening to music on-demand. However, as technology continues to evolve, many smart home devices, such as Amazon Echo and Google Home, now integrate multiple streaming services directly into their platforms. Voice assistants allow users to stream music seamlessly from various services without needing to open a specific app. Additionally, services like YouTube and even TikTok now offer music discovery, blending social media with music streaming and reducing the need for dedicated apps.
In the past, apps like Flipboard and Google News were popular for curating and aggregating news stories. However, with the rise of AI-powered personalized feeds on platforms like Facebook, Twitter, and even LinkedIn, many users now get their news directly from these social networks. The algorithms behind these platforms tailor news content based on your interests, searches, and connections, making standalone news apps less essential for many.
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The Property Council, whose members are some of New Zealand’s largest property developers, owners and investors, has come out in support of the government’s Build to Rent tax exemption boost.
Property Council New Zealand chief executive, Leonie Freeman, says the initiative could mark a key turning point towards unlocking the potential of Build to Rent.
“Our members share the government’s view that enabling Build to Rent will provide warm, dry rental homes that offer Kiwis long-term security of tenure.
“It is encouraging to see that the government has listened to our sector and acknowledged Build to Rent as a unique property asset class.
“The government’s announcement is a major step towards boosting New Zealand’s emerging Build to Rent sector.
“Build to Rent will transform the experience of renting in New Zealand.
“Property Council research shows that our members stand poised to deliver over 25,000 Build to Rent homes in the next decade, with the right policy settings.
“Build to Rent refers to multi-unit residential developments, typically located in city centres within walking distance of key transport links.
“These developments are professionally managed, with brilliant amenities available onsite, offering residents bespoke lifestyle options for as long as they want to stay.
“By enabling Build to Rent, the property sector will be able to deliver thousands of new high-quality, high-density rental houses, supporting New Zealand’s urban intensification and climate ambitions.
“Kiwis will hopefully soon have many choices to access to a warm, dry and climate friendly Build to Rent home.
“Over the past 18 months, the Property Council has been working closely with the government to highlight the untapped potential of Build to Rent and explain the legislative actions required to enable it.
“As part of this, we have collaboratively resolved the unintended consequences of last year’s interest deductibility changes.
“While the announcement has been a fantastic step in the right direction, there are a few remaining speedbumps to truly unlock the concept.
“For Build to Rent to flourish, access to large institutional investment via the overseas investment act and commercial depreciation is also required.
“The Property Council looks forward to continuing our engagement with the government to support the roll out of the world’s fastest growing residential sector in Aotearoa.”
Our team is committed to delivering an exceptional level of customer service. We provide a boutique style of property management with the backing and benefits of the larger Quinovic Group. So if your aim is to make your investment more rewarding, leave your property with us.
P 06 759 0012
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By Jen Baird, former chief chief executive of the Real Estate Institute of New Zealand
Your home is often your largest personal asset, so selling it can be both exciting and stressful at the same time.
That’s why having an agent that you can trust to help you achieve the best price and conditions possible for your home – all while being transparent and ensuring all parties are comfortable and aware of the processes, will make a big difference.
Certain attributes differentiate a great agent from a good agent. We recommend that you look for agents who demonstrate a great deal of professionalism, local knowledge and have a good reputation.
Look for someone who understands the kind of people who will be interested in your home. This will help with the marketing of your home and communicating the benefits of your property to potential buyers.
Local agents often have a network of potential buyers that they have been working with or regularly communicate with, who are ready and able to provide the best price for your home.
Great real estate agents are well connected, therefore asking family and friends if they know an agent they would recommend is a great start; referrals are often the best way to find an agent with a proven track-record, and not just someone who knows how to say the right things at the right time.
When asking for recommendations, remember to ask what factors their recommendation is based on. Did they get the level of communication they wanted? Did they think the agent used the marketing spend effectively? Did they manage any challenges through the process well?
Great real estate agents are well connected, therefore asking family and friends if they know an agent they would recommend is a great start; referrals are often the best way to find an agent with a proven track-record, and not just someone who knows how to say the right things at the right time.
Agents are usually more than happy to come to your property, share their knowledge and talk you through your options for selling. We recommend meeting a few agents before you choose who to work with.
Try visiting open homes they are hosting to understand how they present their vendor’s property. This will help you get a feel for how they will work to get the best for your property.
Take a look online and see how agents are using social media and digital marketing to increase coverage for the properties they are selling, and therefore see what you could expect for your home. Many agents will also use advanced technology to help market and sell your home, which can often reach a broader audience, for example:
• Virtual Reality tours or 3D walkthroughs are one of the options that increase the accessibility of an open home to a wider range of potential purchasers in the first instance, particularly out of town buyers
• Augmented Reality is another option that can help potential purchasers rework the layout of furniture in the home, so they can better picture themselves and their belongings in the home.
Try not to select an agent based solely on their commission fee, but it is important to understand what the fees are. While these do vary by agency, our advice is to choose an agent you trust and whose previous work gives you confidence.
Great agents can achieve a better price for your property by understanding the best strategies according to different market conditions.
At the end of the day, the person you choose is going to be a big part of your life while you sell your home, so it is important that you feel comfortable with them and that you can trust them to get the job done.
Professional!
We brought a home Renee was selling, we found her professional and communicative throughout the entire process. We think she has a bright future as one of New Plymouth's top agents! We would ABSOLUTELY use her again when selling a home, she really is sensational!
Raylene & Stuart – Buyer
Friendly and Professional-Highly recommended!
Renee was very helpful and showed incredible knowledge while assisting our agent in selling our home. Renee had impeccable communication and was prompt in getting us over the line with her clients purchasing our home. She was quick and efficient with a friendly yet professional approach. We would highly recommend Renee!
Benjamin & Amie – Seller
I believe real estate is about relationships, as to me it is more than just a transaction. I like to build connections with my clients as I understand that buying or selling a home is a significant life event. It can be exciting but also stressful at times. This is why I like to find out all about your journey of why you are looking to buy or sell a property. I can then help guide you through the journey and help you reach that final destination of happiness in your new home. Whether you are looking to buy, sell or invest, I’m committed to being your trusted advisor and advocate every step of the way.
You may ask why you should choose to work with me? That is a great question. I’ve been selling real estate in Taranaki for many years, mostly in central and South Taranaki areas. Having sold hundreds of properties, I possess an in-depth understanding of the market and have a keen eye for opportunities. Whether you're looking to downsize or upsize your
home, are a seasoned investor, or looking to make a move into your first home, I can ensure your real estate journey is seamless, successful, and enjoyable.
My past customers tell me that they love the way I use cutting-edge marketing techniques to showcase their properties to the widest possible audience. They enjoy my personal approach of taking the time to understand their unique needs and tailor solutions that best suited their goals.
I have also won many real estate awards, both locally and nationally. This is due to my personal core values of, sheer determination, communication being key, and going the extra mile for my clients.
Give me a call and let’s make a plan to get your property goals achieved today.
By Ben O’Connell
Younger generations increasingly prefer texting and voice notes over traditional phone calls, a shift that can seem confusing to older people. This change has a name: telephobia, the anxiety associated with making or receiving calls.
Phone anxiety stems from social fears, like being judged, feeling caught off guard, or struggling to read body language. Phone calls can feel like performances, adding pressure, especially when they’re unexpected. In contrast, text-based communication offers control and time to reflect, making it a more comfortable and honest medium for many.
Raised in a digital world, younger people often view phone calls as intrusive or outdated. Early experiences with calls, or a lack thereof, can shape long-term comfort levels. This isn’t to say they’re incapable of meaningful conversation. In fact,
Phone anxiety stems from social fears, like being judged, feeling caught off guard, or struggling to read body language.
a thoughtful message or voice note can carry just as much emotional depth as spoken words.
There’s also a darker side to calls: many recall experiences of verbal abuse over the phone. And despite advances in digital communication, phone calls remain unavoidable for tasks like job interviews or service cancellations. Their perceived urgency adds further stress.
Auckland University of Technology’s Dr Lena Waizenegger explains that millennials and Gen Zs often prefer texting because it’s efficient and less disruptive. She recommends texting before calling to avoid catching someone off guard.
The bottom line is that bridging this generational divide requires empathy. Younger people aren’t being rude; they’re navigating communication differently. Meeting each other halfway can help everyone feel more heard and connected, regardless of age or platform.
By Gillian Boyes, Chief Executive, Funeral Directors Association of New Zealand
At many funerals these days, you’ll see a photo tribute or hear specially chosen music that reflects the person who has died.
But have you ever thought about the photos or music you’d want, or want for a loved one? Preparing these details can be a gentle way of beginning the planning for a final farewell and has the added bonus of helping you re-live many happy memories as you begin the sorting process.
If you’ve been wondering how to start here’s some more ideas to talk about with your family.
Think about where you’d like your funeral to take place - Chapels and churches are still popular but increasingly people are opting for highly personalised approaches.
Has a certain sport or interest been a big part of your life? Perhaps your funeral could be at your sports club or the club rooms of your interest group.
Love your garden, the beach, your local park? You could have a special ceremony there (your funeral director will let you know of any local council requirements). Your cultural traditions may dictate the venue. Funeral directors can work within those requirements too.
Your venue might dictate whether you have a funeral (with the body present) or a memorial (with ashes). Both options offer the opportunity for your family and friends to gather and remember which is a key part of their grieving process.
While there are other options too such as burial at sea or donating your body to science, burial on land and cremation remain the most popular choices for most New Zealanders.
If you prefer a burial, some councils allow you to pre-purchase a burial plot which can help you avoid ever increasing cemetery charges.
Consider your casket choice - Caskets these days come in the widest possible varieties. Prefer something simple? An MDF, or plain casket your family can decorate themselves might be for you.
Want to think sustainably? Solid wood options might befit you, or consider a felted wool or wicket casket which might also reflect a love of nature. Shrouds are another option particularly for natural burials. Casket makers can also offer bespoke options including beautifully carved coffins and couches, or special wraps with your favourite image or colour. Yes we’ve even seen a donut themed casket.
Many people find it reassuring to know a deceased body is treated with the highest respect and care at a funeral home. You might have other questions you’d love to ask, so look out for local open days at funeral homes. People find these absolutely fascinating and taking away some of the mysteries about what goes on can also take away the fear.
Get your paperwork in order - A really important gift you can give to your family is having your paperwork in one place. This includes your will but also details that’ll help them close off bank accounts, utilities and even social media. Make sure that if you’ve organised a funeral pre-payment that details of that are included with that paperwork. We’ve sometimes had to follow-up and refund families who had no idea mum or dad had already paid.
A final paperwork tip is to make sure your immediate next-ofkin details are included with your important papers – these are important for death registration.
with your family about
for them - Remember that while you might not want a fuss, your funeral is a time for your family and friends to grieve for you. Coming together, hugging, looking at those wonderful photos or listening to the songs you loved will help them as they come to terms with living without you.
Writing down what you decide, or asking your local funeral home to capture the details in their system so they don’t get mislaid will mean that when the time comes, your special people are left with peace, not decisions.
Hardings Funerals was established in 1913 and operated by the Harding family for three generations, spanning 107 years. Now owned by Kelly and Shaun Judkins, the firm continues the Hardings legacy of meticulous attention to detail, upheld by their dedicated team. They believe their profession is among the most challenging, yet also one of the most rewarding.
At Hardings Funerals, our qualified funeral directors and embalmers provide personal care for you and your loved one every step of the way.
Navigating Grief
They can also facilitate meetings with clergy or celebrants, enabling you to share stories that help create a highly personalised funeral service.
Planning Resources
The death of someone close initiates an inevitable journey called grief. This journey is unique for each individual, with no way to avoid it. Recognizing this, we assist you in navigating your personal pathway, offering guidance and support to help you reach the destination you need by curating the right funeral for you and your loved one.
Comprehensive Funeral Services
During times of loss, the funeral directors at Hardings Funerals guide your family through every aspect of the funeral, ensuring a celebration of life that aligns with your wishes, providing personal assistance at every step. Your funeral director will handle all arrangements, allowing you to focus on more important matters, such as spending time with family and friends and taking care of yourself.
By reviewing our planning guide, you can consider various options and provide details before our meeting. Additionally, we offer a free guide for planning and selecting music, poetry, and readings, which includes ideas for a beautiful and meaningful funeral. Please ask your funeral director for a copy.
Professional Affiliations
Demonstrating our commitment to the industry and adherence to the highest standards, we are proud members of the Funeral Directors Association of New Zealand and the New Zealand Embalmers Association.
At Headstone Warehouse, we understand that a memorial is more than just stone — it’s a tribute to a life well-lived, a story to be remembered for generations.
With two convenient locations in Taranaki, Coronation Ave, New Plymouth, and High Street, Hawera—we are here to support you every step of the way.
As the only dedicated stonemason company in Taranaki that is a proud member of the New Zealand Master Monumental Mason Association, we bring craftsmanship, care, and expertise to every piece we create. Your wishes and ideas will be thoughtfully shaped into a lasting tribute that becomes part of your family’s history.
Led by Shaun and Kelly Judkins, our experienced team takes care of every aspect of headstone design, ensuring that each memorial meets cemetery bylaws while also being safe, durable, and truly personal.
With a warehouse stocked with over 2,000 headstones, you’ll have plenty of options to find the perfect tribute for your loved one.
And if you’re looking for something even more unique, we can work with you to design a completely bespoke piece that reflects their life and legacy.
Choosing a memorial can feel overwhelming, but we’re here to guide you with care, experience, and patience. From selecting the stone and shape to crafting the perfect inscription, we’ll walk you through the process, never rushing, but always making sure everything is completed in time for any special occasion you may have.
At Headstone Warehouse, our philosophy is simple: nothing is too much trouble. Every detail matters, and we take great care to ensure everything is just right.
Every life has a story, and we know how important that story is to you. Let’s create something beautiful together—a story set in stone.
Now in her fourth term, Barbara brings experience, enthusiasm, drive and direction to her role as MP for Taranaki-King Country and Deputy Speaker of the House of Representatives.
With her lengthy career in dairy farming, and agribusiness, Barbara is a former board member of DairyNZ, Primary ITO, Taratahi, Dairy Women’s Network and NZ Young Farmers. She was 2012’s Dairy Woman of the Year and made a Fellow of the NZ Institute of Directors in 2014. Barbara has a Strategic Leadership MBA, is a past scholarship recipient of the Food & Agribusiness Market Experience (FAME) and, in 2023, gained her Postgraduate Certificate in Public Policy from the Victoria University of Wellington. She is a judge of the Rural Games Trust awards.
Barbara is a strategic thinker, who enjoys a challenge, and is well regarded in the
agricultural and agribusiness communities. She believes in continuous personal and professional growth and welcomes opportunities to learn from those around her.
Having lived most of her life in Taranaki, she understands the contribution of NZ’s leading resources region. And, as she travels one of the largest electorates in the country, knows only too well the necessity for well-developed and maintained transport routes; routes rural communities and urban centres need to conduct business efficiently and effectively across the nation. She is a passionate advocate for rural health and community services.
Married to Louis, she is mum to three children — two sons and a daughter — and grandmother to six. Barbara is an avid tramper and whenever possible she and Louis set off and explore New Zealand’s stunning geography, much of which is local.
I’ve always wanted to be able to give more back to the communities I’ve moved in and those beyond. Being an MP allows me to do that in so many rewarding ways. “ ”
Inglewood Office
06 756 6032
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