The Muse- A Leisure World Publication September 2023

MUSE T H E

A LEISURE WORLD PUBLICATION

WHAT’S INSIDE:

Fine Art

Photography

Poetry

Short Stories Activities

A collection of creativity from Leisure World residents

AUGUST 2023

Dean Troutman

Hello, neighbor!

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Owned by the Leisure World Community Association. Published quarterly.

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Cover: Dean Troutman

Photos: Dave Foley, Tom Hanna, Pam Schmitt, Bob Bennett, Sandy Hunter

Art: Ruth Singer, Dean Troutman

Contributing Writers: Vincent Pollock, Joyce Loland, Bob Bennett, D.P., Mary Ellen (M.E.)

For Advertising Information: 480-307-6058 or sannunziato@lwca.com

WISDOM FOR THE YOUNG

Submitted by DP

A wealthy old lady decided to go on a photo safari in Africa, taking her faithful aged poodle named Cuddles, along for company. One day the poodle started chasing butterflies and before long, Cuddles discovered that he was lost. Wandering about, he noticed a leopard heading rapidly in his direction with the intention of having lunch.

The old poodle thinks, “uh-oh! I’m in deep doo-doo now!” Noticing some bones on the ground close by, he immediately settled down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat. Just as the leopard is about to pounce the old poodle exclaims loudly, “Boy, that was one delicious leopard! I wonder if there are any more around here?

Hearing this, the young leopard halts his attack in mid-strike, with a look of terror on his face he slinks away into the trees. “Whew!” exclaimed the leopard, “that was close! That old poodle nearly had me!”

Meanwhile, a monkey who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figured he could put

this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the leopard. So off he went, but the old poodle saw him heading after the leopard with great speed, and figures that something must be up. The monkey soon caught up with the leopard, spilled the beans and struck a deal for himself with the leopard. The young leopard was furious at being made a fool of said, “here monkey, hop on my back and see what is going to happen to that conniving old canine!”

When the old poodle saw the leopard coming with the monkey on his back he thought “what am I going to do now?”, but instead of running, the sat down with his back to his attackers, pretended he hadn’t seen them yet, and when they got close enough to hear, the old poodle said, “Where is that damn monkey? I sent him off an hour ago to bring me another leopard!”

The wisdom here is: Don’t mess with old farts --- age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill! Bull and brilliance only come with age and experience.

Head to a location you’ve been meaning to photograph or pick somewhere familiar. As you walk, stop and take a unique photo after a predetermined number of steps.

Your favorite number? 30? 100? A mile? It’s all up to your creative freedom.

Even if you are not a professional, it could be a fun brain break or chance to practice your skills. Do this with a friend or do it a few times to compare the different outcomes of the environment you choose.

Share with us for the November Muse Edition! Email your

These pictures were taken July 3rd from my deck. Tom Hanna Manor 696

THE ART OF DANCE THROUGH CLOGGING

Submitted by LW Resident Joyce Loland

Clogging is a true American folk dance whose roots are buried deep in the heart of Appalachia. In the mid1700’s, large numbers of immigrants there brought with them their traditional folk dances. Clogging was born as a melding of these dances. Many clogging steps are reminiscent of the Scottish Highland fling and Irish step-dancing. Others with a distinctly military sound are thought to have come from the Germans.

The word “clog” is Gaelic for “time.” The heel is the timekeeper, with rhythms usually coming on the downbeat. Traditional Appalachian cloggers do a constant “shuffle,” a dragging backsliding forward movement on the weight-bearing foot, while the free foot does something else.

In clogging the dancer’s footwear is used percussively by striking the heel, the toe, or both against a floor or each other to create audible rhythms. Clogging shoes have double taps on the toe and heel that produce a distinctive clicking sound. It was from clogging that tap dancing eventually evolved.

What sets traditional clogging apart from other percussive dance styles is its limited upper body movement, much like Irish step dancing. While tap dancers place significant emphasis on stage presence and arm movements, cloggers focus instead on movements of their feet.

Traditional American clogging is associated with “old-time” music based on fiddle and banjo tunes. Clogging of old was done impromptu—and often solo -- to toe-tapping bluegrass music in Appalachia, but it slowly moved out of the mountains to the flatlands and beyond. In recent years clogging has become popular all across America. Dances are now choreographed, and the steps cued. Although the names of the steps vary somewhat depending on region, cloggers can drop in on dance groups anywhere in the country and feel comfortable dancing together.

Today, precision clogging is the most popular type of clogging in the United States. All the dancers do the same step at the same time. Routines may be done as solos, duets, couples, or trios -- or they may be done in lines where partners are not necessary. Dances are choreographed to a wide variety of popular music, not just bluegrass. Country, pop, Broadway, gospel, novelty and many other songs provide the musical basis for dances.

In recent years competitive clogging has become very popular. The speed with which these dancers compete is literally breath taking –170 beats per minute is an average. Some adjudication is done with the judges’ backs to the dancers as the judges listen for the group’s perfectly synchronized sound.

Whether clogging is done for competition or for pure enjoyment, it is a fun, challenging and healthy activity that the whole family can enjoy. Its rich history and exciting pace make it appealing to all ages.

The Leisure World Cloggers meet for Beginner through Advanced Intermediate clogging classes every Friday from 12:00 – 4:00 in the classroom next to the Fitness Center. All are welcome (and Beginner classes are free!). Or simply come to the classroom on a Friday afternoon and observe the fun dancing activity.

As its popularity continues to spread, clogging enthusiasts may one day be able to stop saying, “Clogging is not a plumbing problem!”

A COLLECTION FROM LW RESIDENT ARTIST: Dean Troutman part 1

Dean and wife Marta move to Leisure World in December 2015 from Branson, MO.

Dean spent seven years working for Boeing in Wichita, KS and 28 years as an educator at the Wichita Area Technical College. Dean has had the opportunity to take classes in many mediums, clay, sculpture, woodcarving, stone carving, oil, graphite, colored pencil, and pastel.

He studied for four winters in graphic arts under Virginia (Tiny) Carlson and three years under Helen Rowles at the Mesa Art Center.

He also worked as a guest woodcarver at Silver Dollar City Theme Park in Branson for 45 summers. Dean is a nationally known woodcarver who has won many awards. His subject is usually related to a western theme.

Check out Novembers Muse Edition for more of Dean’s works!

ARTISTS TO WATCH

Submitted by: Vincent Pollock

Artists to Watch is an award-winning company working directly with independent artists to craft high-quality products that are 100% made in America. Their website gives access to products such as greeting cards, journal sets, vinyl stickers, and wall art. It is a great place for gift ideas, and finding new artists’ works to enjoy. Check it out at artiststowatch.com.

Submitted by L.W. Resident Mary Ellen (M.E.)

POETRY ACTIVITY TO TRY!

Blackout Poetry

Blackout poetry is when you take a written piece of text from a book, newspaper, or magazine and redact words, in order to come up with your very own poetry.

Find a newspaper article, old book, or a magazine that you feel comfortable destroying....er, altering.

Skim the passage and keep your eye out for that eye-catching word that will guide the theme of your poem.

Read the poem in its entirety. Go back and circle

words or short phrases that might relate to your eyecatching word or phrase.

Make your final decisions and black out the rest of the poem! Your poem can be made up of single words or phrases. They can be single words, or they can be read like a story. It’s totally up to you!

This exercise is great for those struggling with writer’s block. Have fun with the words and phrases that really speak to you.

Share with us for the November Muse Edition! Email your work to news@ lwca.com.

I can also help you with retirement investing, annuities, grandkid’s college savings, and long-term care insurance.

NEW RESIDENT JOINS PHOTO CLUB

By Bob Bennett

And why wouldn’t he? Once he saw the 2023/2024 Season Premier video, he was all in! You can watch the video too, by clicking here. Enjoy the show and we’ll see you on October 14th!

Photography has come a long way in a relatively short period of time (see Photography Timeline illustration). We have gone from devices as big as a suitcase to ones that slip in your pocket or purse. We have gone from laborious hours in a dark room with smelly chemicals to advanced AI (artificial intelligence) photo processing software that performs at lightning speed. But photography is bottomless. No one will ever know everything, and that’s what holds us. There will always be one more technique to learn, one more product to try, one more mountain to climb. All in a quest for the perfect image that speaks to our soul.

At the end of the day, it’s not the bow and arrow, it’s the Indian. It’s your artistic imagination. It

takes three things to make an outstanding image: light, background, and moment. Some photos are documentary, “I was there, and I saw this.” But the ones that last in our minds are the ones with the most dramatic “moment.” A photo that pulls us in and leads us to something amazing that we created with our composition. “You don’t take a photograph, you make it.” ― Ansel Adams

“All work and no play make Jack a dull boy,” and at the LW Photography Club, we don’t let that happen. No, we love to go, we love to shoot, we love to learn, we love to share, we love to eat. If you would like to know more about our club, please visit https://www. lwphoto.club/

CITATION:

Bellis, Mary. “Photography Timeline.” ThoughtCo, Aug. 27, 2020, thoughtco.com/photographytimeline-1992306.

NO ONE IS PROMISED TOMORROW...

You are taking the first steps to get this process under way. Many individuals, families and business owners procrastinate this very important area of planning. We are humans and have the gi�t of optimism... Floating down the River of Denial. �e common thing we hear when someone speaks with us is "I know we need this done"... and when it's complete, "I feel so much better". None of us are promised tomorrow. You will be surprised how easy the process is a�ter it's complete. Most of our customers are pleasantly surprised that the cost are much lower than they imagined. Don't let the perceived high cost or lack of time get in your way of planning. I assure you that not planning cost much more time and money than just getting it done.

DRAWING ACTIVITY: One Day, One Theme

Do this activity as a one-time thing or create a journal of your one themes.

Choose a theme and make multiple small drawings/ doodles of things that follow that theme. For example, your theme could be...hats, coffee, road signs, skyscrapers, pastries, a pet, etc. Or perhaps… things that rhyme with cat, things in my purse, things in my neighborhood, things that start with the letter B…etc.

Try to keep the creative flow going by varying the scale, varying your viewpoint, using different drawing techniques, or playing with different medias (ex. Pen, marker, oil pastel, etc.).

Share with us for the November Muse Edition! Email your work to news@lwca.com.

*Example credit: Art from Andy Warhol

Photo credit: LW Resident Sandy Hunter

LOCAL ARIZONA ART MUSEUMS UPCOMING & CURRENT EXHIBITS OR SPECIAL EVENTS

MESA ARTS CENTER: www.mesaartscenter.com

Upcoming & Current Exhibits:

• Día De Los Muertos Festival: Spirits Connect

October 21 - 22, 2023 Saturday- Sunday 10 a.m.5p.m.

HEARD MUSEUM: heard.org

Upcoming & Current Exhibits:

• Arriving Forever into the Present World Through March 3, 2024, Arriving Forever into the Present World will feature works from the Heard Museum’s permanent collection.

• Indeterminate Beauty: Presents a brief yet bold selection of works by influential Kiowa/Caddo artist T.C. Cannon. Through August 2024.

• The North Star Changes: Works by Brenda Mallory Through February 5, 2024, The North Star Changes: Works by Brenda Mallory, features sculptures that the artist has made using reclaimed and found objects, some taking the form of large-scale installations.

PHOENIX ART MUSEUM: phxart.org

Upcoming & Current Exhibits:

• Mission and Legacy: Friends of Mexican Art’s Enduring Impact in the Valley and Beyond February 2023 - December 2023

• Move: The Modern Cut of Geoffrey Beene February 2023 - December 2023

• Fashioning Self: The Photography of Everyday Expression March 2023 - November 2023

• Special-Engagement Exhibition JUAN FRANCISCO

ELSO: POR AMÉRICA May 2023 - September 2023

• Lo Que Es, Es Lo Que Ha Sido/What It Is, Is What Has Been: Selections from the ASU Art Museum’s Cuban Art Collection May 2023 - Sep 2023

• Special Installation Reynier Leyva Novo: Methuselah May 2023 - September 2023

• Migration Stories: Arizona Collects Cuban Art Apr 2023 - Dec 2023

IMAGE CREDIT: Juan Francisco Elso with his artwork Caballo contra colibrí, c. 1987-88. Fondo Magali Lara / Elso Padilla, Centro de Documentación. Arkheia MUAC (UNAM-DiGAV) Photo: Cristina Lobeira.

ASU ART MUSEUM: asuartmuseum.org

Upcoming & Current Exhibits:

• Luis Rivera Jimenez: A Brief Proposal on Race and Cultural Cosplay, from August 19 - December 31, 2023.

• Crafting Resistance August 19, 2023 - Jully 14, 2024.

• “Everything Is a Little Fuzzy,” draws from the museum’s permanent collection. With an eye on dimensions of memory and care, it explores the challenges experienced in a post-pandemic world. July 22 -December 31.

Continues on page 26

LOCAL ARIZONA ART MUSEUMS CONTINUED

CHANDLER MUSEUM: www.chandleraz.gov/explore/ arts-and-culture/chandler-museum

• 1968: A Folsom Redemption, A candid and personal photography exhibition covering a critical juncture in the career of one of the twentieth century’s most beloved performers—Johnny Cash. June 20 - Aug. 13, 2023.

SCOTTSDALE MUSEUM OF CONTEMPORARY ART: smoca.org

• Language in Times of Miscommunication: This exhibition presents artworks that use various forms of language to critically examine the complexities of social reality during times of rampant miscommunication. March 4 – August 27, 2023.

• Phillip K. Smith III: Three Parallels: Southern California artist Phillip K. Smith III creates a sitespecific, commissioned work that highlights changes in perception as related to light, color, time, and space. October 29 – January 14, 2024.

VISION GALLERY: visiongallery.org

Exhibits:

• Art Quilts XXVIII: Breaking Rules, Honoring Tradition: For our 28th annual Art Quilts exhibition, fiber artists from across the country and abroad are invited to submit to this annual exhibition of contemporary art quilts, showcasing some of the finest textile art on display in the Southwestern United States. This exhibition will take place at the Vision Gallery and is expected to draw hundreds of visitors to experience quilting as an art form. November 18, 2023-January 12, 2024.

• Unbound: In this exhibition, artists have, if just for a moment, become unbound from the responsibility of representation and allowed themselves to be not just representatives of their communities, but themselves. August 26 – November 9, 2023.

LOCAL ART RELATED EVENTS

• September 23rd 11:00 a.m. – 1:00 p.m. Free Make and Take: Mini Zines: Express yourself in a miniature zine (short for magazine) using collage, drawing, cartooning, or whatever you like! Vision Gallery in Chandler.

• October 28th 10:00 a.m. – 12:00 p.m. Art Social Jack-o-lantern Luminarias: Get into the fall spirit with these fun ceramics class for beginners! Participants will learn how to make and join pinch pots into closed forms, then shape them into pumpkin luminarias of their own design. All materials included. Vision Gallery in Chandler.

Word Search Short Story

With a writing utensil of choice and paper in hand, throughout your day or on your evening neighborhood stroll, from the world around you find: 10 verbs, 5 adjectives, and 10 nouns. With your newly found words ready, try and come up with a short story utilizing all 25 words.

This exercise is a fun way to think outside the box and get your mind and body in motion.

Share with us for the November Muse Edition! Email your work to news@lwca.com.

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“Just there yesterday getting a cleaning by Lynne! She’s the best! Couldn’t ask for a more comfortable office, dentist and hygienist!”

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We can transition you to a new smile in ONE DAY, if qualified (see images below).

Art by LW Resident Ruth Singer

A COLLECTION FROM LW RESIDENT ARTIST: Dean Troutman part 2

JUST A GIRL

Submitted by L.W. Resident Mary Ellen (M.E.)

When it was time I opened my eyes

To see the world Full of surprise; Heard the words How they rang!

“She’s just a girl”!

So, my brother exclaimed As I was laid Upon the plain Blanket on the bed

“Yep, she’s just a girl”

Later when I began

To walk

I skirted by all kinds of blocks I kept on going

Nothing to stop

Me from coming and going

Until that day

I took a humongous flop

Then I heard those

Echoing words again

She’s just a girl, What do you expect?

The words came

From my brother the pest.

As time went on I wanted to join in on the fun

Basketball seemed such a delight.

My brother told me

I wasn’t the type

To make a basket

Or go down court.

Well, I showed him all right!

I gave his team an awful fright

As I skirted by them left, then right.

Making baskets

Every thought was out of sight. She’s just a girl

My brother cried She has no ability No way-She was just lucky That’s all I can say.

So, the years passed. College came about I decided I wanted to become and astronaut

So, science I pursued, Studied about space Mused-I wanted to live on Mars Or at least reach for the stars.

Oh no, my brother disagreed

She’s only a girl. We have no need For her to pursue such goals

She’ll get married Put just food into bowls For us men to eat

Well, I didn’t quite reach the stars I did join them with some stripes Went out to become A person in the Navy Went out to fight for Country and family.

Then that faithful night

As I was on my watch A frightful lightening sight

Flew over the ship

I could no longer say What happened that following day.

I was flown to my land

There, my brother took Me by the hand

As tears rolled down his face

He cried as he tried my body

To embrace

She’s only a girl

Don’t let her go

I never told her

I loved her so.

Please leave her here

To challenge me.

Oh, dear Lord

Don’t you see She’s only a girl.

I held his hand

As best I could

Knowing, I would leave all behind Another world to climb.

So, I looked down one day

Watched my brother

Holding a bundle

His newborn babe

Exclaiming

“She’s a girl!”

I’m so proud

Smiling down

So was I!

Photos submitted by LW Resident Pam Schmitt

Photo submitted by LW Resident Pam Schmitt

A COLLECTION FROM LW RESIDENT ARTIST: Dean Troutman part 3

ARIZONA SUMMER’S EXTREME WEATHER

Photos created by LW Resident Dave Foley Manor 1065

Exaggeration of a monsoon over downtown Phoenix.

My wife did cook an egg in the sunshine in our front yard.

Violence of a haboob over the desert.

A COLLECTION FROM LW RESIDENT ARTIST: Dean Troutman part 4

The�SaGa oF�

BaD�LiTtLE lErOy

BY DP

Here it was, May had arrived again. Even though it was late in coming, spring was on its way; the snow was all but melted and the geese were returning to the Rock. All over Alaska folks were looking forward to spring, with its warmer temperatures, and everything turning green. Even folks on the rock were starting to get excited. Spring meant O and A projects, overtime Davis-Bacon wages, most everyone was looking forward to spring, that is most everyone except DP.

Now anyone who’s talked to DP long enough to talk about the weather knows DP loves his interior Alaskan winters. He’ll even tell you he was born in Arizona, raised in the American southwest, even spent ten years in Texass. When he headed North it was to get away from big crowds of people, but he found the additional benefit of getting out of the heat except for one or two months of the year. So now, you can’t get him to go south (that’s a curse word to him). The bride is the only one able to get him to go that direction and even she has to do a lot of fast-talking.

So here’s ole DP, he’s normally somewhat cantankerous anyway, but now add on the fact that he just went through his third non-winter (the Rock doesn’t have a winter as far as he is concerned). He’s just completing another rotation, which was a little more stressful than normal (due to certain personalities). He’s looking forward to relaxing with his chainsaw and 4-wheeler on TOS (Time Off Station) getting wood and calming the stress. At the last minute, the bride informs him she has a baby niece that’s getting married. Ole DP is thinking that’s nice, all good girls should get married before they get into trouble. Then the bride tells him the family wants them in attendance as they really want to make sure it’s a memorable event for everyone. That’s a good idea; they could hold the ceremony on the Simpson hill overlook (great view of the Copper River and Wrangle Mountains), and then honeymoon in the trapper cabin. She (the bride) then tells him the wedding is going to be in a castle in Southern Louisiana, you know down by New Orleans. Now it took awhile for that last bit of information to register in DP’s consciousness, but you can imagine the reaction when it did.

Well, as I said before if it’s important enough to the bride, she can usually get DP to go south (at least for a short time). This was one of those times. Now DP was a little more than depressed, but he didn’t want to mess up the bride’s trip. They packed up (including top hat, tails, and spats), got dressed in the new look, and headed to the Anchor town airport. All this time DP was wondering what he could do (others might say what trouble could he get into) besides die of the heat.

The bride had used a travel agent to make the arrangements. They found out you don’t get tickets anymore. They just fax a sheet of data. So, at the airport while DP is dragging luggage (to get it checked in), and sweating in the sixty plus temperature, while dreading the Louisiana heat, the bride attempts to get the boarding passes at one of those computerized kiosks. It wouldn’t give her the tickets. After several tries she went over to a real person who was able to get the boarding passes. So, DP already soaked in sweat hauled the luggage over there while still wondering what he could do in Louisiana except die in the heat. Turned out someone with DP’s name was on a TSA watch list – great way to start a trip.

Finally DP and the bride got through security and it was time to get the flask filled for the flight to Chicago. Would you believe he couldn’t even get his flask filled anywhere? Tell me if that isn’t unfair trade practices when you don’t want to pay in-flight prices. It was going to be one long flight to Chicago packed in like sardines. On that flight two things started going through DP’s mind. The first caused him to make a life-long decision. The second was an old tune that Jerry Reed sang entitled “Amos Moses”. Finally that flight ended.

So here was DP and the bride in O’Hare airport next to the windy city of Chi-town. Now that brought back some memories. You see, DP had lived in a Chicago suburb and worked downtown Chicago the year before he got drafted in the mid 60’s, but that’s another story for another time. Anyway, the bride got them squared away for the hop to New Orleans, or as DP says “Nawlins”. As they were waiting to board the plane he continued to sweat in the heat and remember. That tune came back into his head with the line “huntin alligators in the Louisiana swamp”.

That hop to New Orleans wasn’t near as bad as the previous flight. The Plane wasn’t as crowded and seemed to have more room, the sun was shining and DP started watching outside once they got over the South. That land was so flat he could actually see the Atlantic Ocean from three states inland; of course they were those itty-bitty states of the Deep South, nothing like the real state of Alaska. Anyway, DP was enjoying the view and kept thinking of that song’s line “huntin alligators in the Louisiana swamp.” All of a sudden it hit him – like a bolt of lightning out of the blue. Instead of just dying in the heat, he could rassle an alligator!

The plane came in over Lake Ponchartrain parallel to the causeway to New Orleans, but then DP lost his bearings again as the plane landed. DP and the bride deplaned and walked the mile (well, maybe not quite a mile) to the unsecured area of the airport. That’s where they see Pat and Rusty waiting for them; of course Rusty was almost rolling with laughter at his first sight of DP’s new look.

Now Pat is a fine southern lady as well as the bride’s cousin. She’s a few months older than the bride and likes people and having fun. Rusty on the other hand is about four years younger and to use his own words he is “one of the last river rats and a true coon-ass”. He also has a sense of humor and likes to have fun. He came to Alaska a couple of times and the last time he took a bag full of moose nuggets home and put them in a crystal candy dish. He tells people they are smart pills as they pop one in their mouths. When the people spit them out growling at him he looks at them laughing and says, “Now aren’t you smarter than you were a minute ago? They’re moose nuggets.” But, we are getting side tracked onto another story for another time.

Pat and Rusty hooked up and got married about fourteen years ago. You would be hard pressed to find a finer and more obliging couple. As they were all hugging and greeting DP managed to wheeze (in the high humidity) “where do we get some scuba gear in order to breathe, as I don’t have gills?” After

getting the luggage they finally got into the car’s air-conditioned cab – what a relief, air that was dry enough to breath without gills and was cool enough to not cook your lungs.

Naturally, on the way to their place there was about four years of catching up to do, and a stop for a bite (well, maybe a little more than a bite) to eat. Love that catfish and dirty rice. Then as they were talking about the upcoming wedding and possible activities for the next two weeks DP told Rusty he wanted to “rassle an alligator”.

Since DP and the bride arrived in the middle of the week Rusty had to go to work the next day. Now, Rusty has worked for the Louisiana DOT for close to forty years and has a position inspecting contractors’ work on the highways all over that southern part of Louisiana. Unbeknown to DP, Rusty was working down in one of the bayou areas, and being the obliging kind of guy Rusty is, he was keeping his eyes open for an alligator to rassle DP.

All of a sudden he saw an alligator standing next to the highway waiting for a break in traffic so he could cross to the other side.

Rusty slammed on his breaks and screeched to a stop thinking this is the perfect alligator for DP to rassle, as it was about six feet long. He jumped out of the truck, grabbed a yeller tie-down and with the hooks set up a lasso. He lassoed that old alligator and said, “come on alligator, I’ve got a sourdough that wants to rassle you”.

That old alligator turned back to the water and started grunting and hissing at Rusty as he pulled toward the water. Now, Rusty started listening to that old alligator and being an old river rat he could understand alligator. That alligator was laughing at Rusty and saying: “I’ve heard about them sourdoughs. They’s mean, coldhearted ole cusses. I’m old and tired, and I’ve earned

THE BROWN FAMILY

my peace. If ya’ll want an alligator to rassle that sourdough get yourself a young energetic one. Bein young and dumb as they is, they aint got enough sense not to tangle with a sourdough. Besides they got all that excess strength and energy to waste. So, I’m just gonna go back to my comfortable, peaceful, swamp and rest.” He dug all four claws into the weeds and ground at the water’s edge and started tugging Rusty with him. Rusty finally had to let go of his tie-down or get wet. So, if you ever happen to go by the bayou in that area and see an old alligator with a yeller collar and a yeller leash attached, you can be assured that’s one smart alligator.

Rusty got back in his truck and headed on down the highway. He was a little upset about losing his yeller tie down and being the obliging kind of guy he was, he was depressed about not getting an alligator for DP to rassle. All of a sudden he saw a young alligator in between the opposing traffic lanes ahead. This little guy had gotten halfway across the highway and was now snapping at traffic going in both directions. Naturally, this cheered Rusty up as he pulled to the side of the highway. He knew this one would be dumb enough to rassle an old sourdough.

When there was a break in the traffic that ole river rat ran out to the middle of the highway (that would have been a sight worth taking a picture of) and kicked that little alligator clear off to the shoulder of the road, and then ran back to it. As Rusty was running up to the alligator he told the alligator that he wanted him to rassle an old sourdough. That alligator started running toward Rusty and hissed; “I’m bad little Leroy, and I’m not gonna wait for some ole sourdough, I’m gonna tear me up a river-rat right now”. He then snapped onto Rusty’s boot and wouldn’t let go.

Rusty fought and yelled at Leroy to let go of his boot, but he just couldn’t pry him off. So he finally gave up and slipped out of his boot, and threw the boot

and Leroy into the toolbox in the bed of his truck. He then headed back down the highway with only one boot on. He called home to tell DP he was headed home and would be there in about a half hour with an alligator to rassle.

By the time Rusty got to the house Leroy had given up on the boot – guess he figured it was already dead as it smelled so bad in that confined space. So, Rusty was able to get his boot back and get Leroy out of the truck. Then he introduced Leroy to DP. Now Bad Little Leroy was only about three and a half to four feet long from snout to the tip of his tail (that’s why he was called little). But he was so mean and strong he was definitely bad.

After the introductions, Rusty let Leroy go so the rasslin could commence, but Leroy was still so mad at him he went after the river-rat instead of the sourdough. Finally the rasslin began with Leroy and DP fresh and ready to get to it. Like the start of almost all contests the opponents had to feel each other out to develop some sort of strategy. Right away DP found out Leroy could really cause some pain with his jaws and teeth, but also there were some wicked claws on all four feet and Leroy wasn’t about to rassle with any of his feet tied behind his back. Bad little Leroy had some tricks up his tail even though he was young and dumb. Let’s see what happens if I go limp. Then all of a sudden start spinning like a top and at the same time start clawing for all I’m worth. Since that didn’t break the ole sourdough’s grip and determination let’s try slappin him with my tail and twist to bite one of his hands. Bad little Leroy used every trick he had ever tried before and still couldn’t break free of that ole sourdough. Every time DP would just about pin that feisty little alligator he would come up with another trick. They continued to rassle around trying to wear each other down. The rasslin got so serious that DP even lost his shades. Since there were no rules in this contest there was biting and clawing and kicking along with twisting, spinning and thumping. That’s

about when DP started to get serious and give bad little Leroy a dose of his own tactics and gave Leroy a good bite. But in the ole timer’s wisdom he knew a great place to bite would be right on the spine. Now, that was something little Leroy hadn’t experienced before and it definitely took a lot of fight out of him. They continued on rasslin around rolling around and wearing each other down. For a while Leroy would be on top, and then DP would be on top. Leroy would try to slip out DP’s hold and get away to catch his breath, but DP would catch him by the tip of his tail, so Leroy would twist around snappin to beat all. Leroy finally realized he had met his match. He found out the hard way to be careful who he messed with as all his youth, flexibility, and energy was still no match for the wisdom and perseverance of the old-timer. They rassled and growled and hissed at each other. DP finally got him pinned and started putting poor little Leroy to sleep. Yep, rubbing an alligator’s belly really does calm them down. As Leroy calmed down DP put him into a dog cage which he put halfway into Rusty’s pond.

The idea was to let Little Leroy free in the pond, that way he and Rusty could get to know each other better as Leroy grew. And maybe if DP ever made it back down there some day they could have a rematch. When Pat heard about this idea, it was like setting off a bomb (she was almost as bad as her cousin – the bride). She really got mad and told DP in no uncertain terms that this pond was her skinnydippin pond and she wasn’t about to share it with any gator. There’s no tellin what he’d bite on to. Then a neighbor on the other side of the pond started raising cane, saying that d*@#nd gator would eat his dogs.

Now none of this bothered or convinced DP. But poor Rusty had to live with Pat and also deal with the neighbor periodically. So another plan for Leroy had to be developed. In the meantime DP continued to enjoy the air-conditioning of the Shedteau. That’s what Rusty calls his party/guest house. As he started building it, it was originally to be a shed, but ended up more of a chateau. The bride and others claimed to be enjoying the heat and humidity sitting by the pond. Yah, Right!

Poor Little Leroy had to languish in that cage wanting his freedom for a couple more days until someone could come up with a plan on where to let him go. Finally, on the morning before everybody had to leave to find the castle where the wedding

was to be held, DP and Rusty got up early, while the morning swamp mist was still settled on the pond, they grabbed the cage holding Leroy. They loaded it into the truck and headed down the road about three quarters of a mile to another pond in an unused field. Here they let Leroy out of the cage, but instead of running to the pond he spun around and started chasing Rusty. He was just so mad at Rusty. Leroy blamed him for all of the humiliation and suffering he had to put up with. Rusty finally convinced Leroy to go to the pond as it would be his only. Besides they could go over their problems later if he was right near by. Also if DP makes it back some day they could have a rematch. So Bad Little Leroy headed into the pond. Rusty and DP went to breakfast to discuss how they could have

fun at the wedding the next day without getting into too much trouble. But that’s another story for another time.

Now, one thing a person should remember from this experience -- is to not mess with old f*#ts, as age and treachery will always overcome youth and strength. Cunning and brilliance only come with age and experience.

Oh, that life-long decision made on the flight to Chicago – except for the flights to and from the Rock, DP will only be flying first class from now on, or he won’t be flying.

Yes, Grandpa still has a whole lot more wisdom to pass on, but not now, those are stories for other times.

The End

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