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contents

staff EDITORIAL

DEC. 8-14, 2011 » VOL. 19, NO. 11

Editor Scott Dickensheets sdickensheets@lvcitylife.com 477-3882 A&E Editor Mike Prevatt mprevatt@lvcitylife.com 477-3810 News Editor Kristy Totten ktotten@lvcitylife.com 477-3809 Staff Writers Amy Kingsley akingsley@lvcitylife.com 477-3843 Max Plenke mplenke@lvcitylife.com 477-3831

p16

Interns Maggie Dyer Ashton Hall Contributing Writers Phillip Booth, Colin Boyd, Rob Brezsny, Ryan Foley, Gigi Generaux, Tod Goldberg, Jack Johnson, Matt Kelemen, Jenessa Kenway, George Knapp, Heidi Kyser, Al Mancini, Michaelangelo Matos, David McKee, Chip Mosher, Alissa Nutting, M.T. Richards, Lissa Townsend Rodgers, Anthony Springer, Dan Weiss

p21

p14 NEWS

4 CITYPICKS 8 SLANT

12

9 SOCRATES IN SODOM Questions answered! 10 KNAPPSTER Bankers, anger — and Occupy

ART Designer Maureen Adamo madamo@lvcitylife.com 477-3848

NOTES FROM THE GROUND

A homeless man has been sending us dispatches about life on the streets. A few excerpts.

12 THE WEEK 14 Not a gift guide, a give guide: What to donate to

Contributing photographers & illustrators Jeferson Applegate, Andrew DeGraff, Stephanie Gonzales, Bill Hughes, Todd Lussier, Aaron McKinney, Saeed Rahbaran

charities this holiday season

BUSINESS

16 A&E

21 STAGE Can our critic quell his dislike of Michael Jackson long enough to enjoy the new MJ Cirque show? 22 ART The organic and the artificial come together in an exhibit of exciting artwork

23 DINING Bread & Butter: good food, good community

24 CRAWL Repeal!

25 CALENDAR

31 FREE WILL ASTROLOGY

32 CLASSIFIEDS

Director of Magazines Kelly Travis ktravis@reviewjournal.com 383-0365

Cover photo courtesy Bobbie Hemlock

CITYLIFE

Classified Sales Manager Marguerite Jones mjones@reviewjournal.com 380-4510

1111 W. Bonanza Road, Las Vegas, NV 89106 Editorial fax: 702.477.3899 Advertising fax: 702.383.0389 Classified fax: 702.383.0326 Classified e-mail: classads@lvcitylife.com

Freelance submissions are welcomed and, on occasion, read by editors. Send materials to Editor Scott Dickensheets at sdickensheets@lvcitylife.com or A&E Editor Mike Prevatt at mprevatt@lvcitylife.com. If you’d like to list an event in our paper, send an e-mail to listings@lvcitylife.com. Avoid faxes because that’s sooo 1987. Please keep in mind our listings are a service for our readers, newsprint’s expensive and we can’t fit everything. Photographs should be clearly labeled and might be returned if a self-addressed, stamped envelope is included.

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42 ON THE SCENE Test day at The Center

Las Vegas CityLife

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DECEMBER 8, 2011 | CITYLIFE

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PICKS WEEK OF THE

Puscifer

[GET SCROOGE OUT OF YOUR SYSTEM] FRIDAY-SUNDAY, DEC. 9-11

One Christmas Carol

[WATCH THE FALL CONCERT CALENDAR CLOSE] THURSDAY-SUNDAY, DEC. 8-11

Before the chill F

orget the bone-cold weather for a second. The real chill is ahead: A dearth of noteworthy concert alternatives. But hold the despair for one week. We’ve got one final blowout of interesting shows to hopefully tide us over until local venues lasso in those acts brave enough to tour through the winter. David Bazan: The former Pedro the Lion lead man — now striking it out on his own, with two albums already under his belt — returns to Las Vegas nearly two years after his last Beauty Bar show. Though his famous indignation toward religion has been toned down a bit in recent material,don’t expect any diminished sentiment from Bazan, who peppers his sets with improvised Q&A sessions a la Shellac. (With Rusty Maples. Dec. 8, Beauty Bar, $10-$12.) Peter Murphy: Here’s another legendary band founder-cum-solo artist

4 CITYLIFE | DECEMBER 8, 2011

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who’s no stranger to Las Vegas. The ex-Bauhaus singer knows the vast sea of Goth-friendly music fans come out to support its favorite artists, just as it did for Murphy during his June 2008 visit to the House of Blues. This time, he hits the Joint — upgraded from what was initially a Body English gig — in support of this year’s well-received Ninth. (With She Wants Revenge and Hussle Club, Dec. 10, The Joint, $35.) Puscifer: This show is for anyone who thinks Maynard James Keenan is only the brooding, mercurial, elusive singer of Tool. Here, he indulges his vampier, more baroque artistic tendencies … as well as his comedic ones, as Puscifer shows tend to feature variety-show-like vignettes that highlight the lighter side you never thought he had.(With Carina Round.Dec.10,The Pearl,$35-$45.) X: Fans of the revered L.A.-based punk band ought not to miss this one. All four original band members — singer Exene Cervenka, singer/bassist John Doe, guitarist Billy Zoom and drummer DJ Bonebrake — have reunited, postscripting its fall tour celebrating X’s essential Los Angeles album with its traditional “X-Mas Rock ‘n’ Roll Revival” tour. (With Sean Wheeler & Zander Schloss and Black Tibetans. Dec. 18, House of Blues, $25-$28.) And if alternative rock isn’t your thing, there’s always the y’all-ternative: Outlaw icon Merle Haggard, a necessary antidote to all the “new” country poisoning Las Vegas this week. (Dec. 8-9. Golden Nugget, $75.90-$192.50.) MIKE PREVATT

Talkaboutrange.This weekend, one actor will perform all 32 different roles in A Christmas Carol, from the chainrattling ghost of Marley to the benevolent tyke Tiny Tim. Kellan Baker will also play Scrooge, the object of spiritual transformation who anchors Charles Dickens’ Christmas classic. Usually A Christmas Carol is a big-budget affair with a cast of dozens. If Baker pulls it off, this production will be a powerhouse of a different sort. The set consists of three chairs. The cast consists of him. Thankfully, the script is still Dickens, who already proved that one man can capture more than 30 different characters. Amy Kingsley. Friday-Saturday, 7:30 p.m., Sunday, 2 p.m.; BackStage Theater at CSN, 3200 E. Cheyenne Ave., 651-5483, $10.


[MADE YOU LOOK!] FRIDAY-SUNDAY, DEC. 9-11

The Art of Pee-Wee Herman

Enter the doors of Blackbird Studios and just to your left is breakfast — Pee Wee Herman’s breakfast, to be exact, with the fried-egg eyes, strawberry nose and bacon lips atop a pancake face. It not only spurs the nostalgia for anyone that grew up with the TV shows and films of the world’s most famous overgrown kid, but whets the appetite for an expansive, multi-space exhibit in tribute to Pee Wee. He’s a loner, a rebel, and the muse for countless local artists — including some younger ones from Las Vegas Academy — exhibiting multimedia homages to the 1980s star and his memorable co-stars and props. We can only imagine Pee Wee being flattered by the inspired and comprehensive nature of this group show — flattered enough to finally bring his popular Broadway stage show to Las Vegas, maybe? We certainly hope so! Mike Prevatt. Friday,6 p.m.-12 a.m.,Saturday,1-6 p.m.,Sunday,1-5 p.m.,and by appointment; Blackbird Studios, 1551 S. Commerce Street, #A, 742-6241, free.

[BE A GOOD NEIGHBOR] SATURDAY, DEC. 10

Santa in the Circle The complaints are totally unoriginal, yet you hear them all the time. Vegas lacks community. I don’t know my neighbors. Nevadans are rude. My mother never wanted me. OK, not that one. But the first three? All the time. And, it’s true in some cases. But what has the whiny crowd ever done to change things? Have they ever, say, initiated eye contact? Block partied? Lent some sugar? Probably not. Downtowners can change that this weekend during a holiday gathering at Huntridge Circle Park where people’ll be able to — gasp! — meet their strange next-door dwellers and spread the holiday cheer. On Saturday afternoon, neighbors are encouraged to walk or bike over for baked goods, hot cocoa and cider and photo opps with Santa. If you’re feeling really nice, bring a dish to share. Kristy Totten. 2-4 p.m.; Huntridge Circle Park, North Maryland Parkway and Franklin Avenue, call 277-4566 or e-mail mclary121@gmail.com for more info, free.

[DO THE RIGHT THING] THURSDAY-SUNDAY, DEC. 8-11

Films That Feed

Don’t make us go all Jacob Marley on your ass and try to scare you into a little holiday generosity — especially when you can attend this socially conscious film festival instead. Two cans of food (which will be donated to Three Square) or a new, unwrapped toy (Toys for Tots) will buy your admission into this series of excellent documentaries. There’s Phyllis and Harold, filmmaker Cindy Kleine’s searingly candid portrait of her parents and the ups and downs of their 55-year marriage. In Dirt: The Phyllis and Harold Movie, Jamie Lee Curtis narrates a look at the mysteries and global importance of soil — one look at the trailer (at www.filmsthatfeed.com) and you’ll see it’s not as dust-dry as you think. Plus, there are films about overcoming disease, about the aftermath of war and more. Check ’em out — remember, mankind is your business! Scott Dickensheets. 7 p.m. each day, plus 4 p.m. on Sunday, Dec. 11; Theatre 7, 1406 S. Third St., see www.filmsthatfeed.com for schedule details.

Thursday, December 8 and Friday, December 9 Shows at 9:00 p.m.

Treasure Island Theatre Tickets: 702.894.7722

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DECEMBER 8, 2011 | CITYLIFE

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FEEDBACK I AM NOT A FAKE

In a recentish Crawl piece about drinking like a tourist on Fremont Street, Lissa Townsend Rodgers noted, in passing, the celebrity impersonators who work the area. She refered to one as “the fake Rick James,” reasoning that someone who performs as Rick James but is not, in fact, Rick James, could be referred to as such. Not according to the performer himself, who took “fake” to be a slur on his professionalism: I WAS DIRECTED by a friend to pick up a copy of CityLife issued Nov.10.I read the article that had a photo of me and an Elvis taken in February.The [article] in the Nov.10 issue was a put-down,an insult and defamation of character that one could be sued for.I am not a FAKE. According to Webster,a fake = by any sort of deception; to practice deception; anything or anyone not genuine — fraud,shame,false — to deceive. Being a tribute artist is not a fraud.Being an actor,playing a part or a person’s life in a movie is called acting.Is the Legends show or Diva show fake? Tribute = to pay or show gratitude,respect,honor or praise.Actor = a person who acts in plays,movies,etc — a doer. The article written by Lissa Townsend Rodgers is a defamation of my character. I am not a fake, as she put it. I have been an entertainer all of my life, touring and performing with different bands aross the U.S. I have won the “Be a Legend” singing contest twice, as Rick James and Stevie Wonder. I have sung on Channel 13, I have been interviewed on radio in Las Vegas for my performances. I’ve performed at Bugsy’s, Chocies Pub, Stratosphere, etc. Why would this writer brand me in your paper as a fake? She did not do her research. I demand an apology. GP Entertainer (FROM THE MAILBOX)

PROTESTING THE PROTESTER Last week, staff writer Amy Kingsley compared the welfare mothers protest of the early ’70s to the ongoing Occupy movement. This reader wasn’t impressed with the welfare mother we quoted:

WHAT A WASTE of a life, of food, water and air, if the biggest accomplishment of your life is begging successfully for more handouts. I bet her kids are big successes, as well. Mike McD

(FROM THE WEBSITE)

6 CITYLIFE | DECEMBER 8, 2011

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NV ENERGY UNPLUGGED

In last week’s Damned Pundit, columnist Hugh Jackson deconstructed NV Energy’s latest rate-increase proposal. Some reaction:

GOOD REASON why hundreds of thousands of consumer owned solar PV rooftops are needed in Nevada. Cutting our local utility monopoly out of the energy picture for our children’s future is a good thing. Plugging an electric vehicle into a solar charger will also help to cut them out of the energy picture. It might do some good to do a search on Wall Street, the BLM and the lack of solar PV farm permits in Nevada. Ralph

(FROM THE WEBSITE)

HUGH JACKSON writes “... the company’s decision-makers always have to be such dicks about everything.” Now, that was a juvenile comment, Mr. Jackson. You lost your entire argument on that immature insult. Arthur Throckmorton

(FROM THE WEBSITE)

Editor’s note: Really, his entire argument? So now our energy monopoly isn’t trying to “lift an extra $249 million out of our pockets”? It isn’t attempting to slyly build in unnecessary interest to our future payments? These developments aren’t being met with approving silence by Republicans?

RADIO, RADIO

Last week, Mike Prevatt, in analyzing playlist changes at KXTE 107.5-FM, compared it to a legendary Los Angeles radio station:

WOW, to say KXTE is like KROQ. That’s a HUGE compliment. I’ll have to have a listen. KROQ formed my music taste back in the early ’80s. Still, terrestrial radio is so blasé. Satellite radio is where it’s at! Walt Dittrich

(FROM FACEBOOK)

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SLANT

WE THINK Summary of recent events AND THE FREMONT STREET REGULARS VOMITED HELLO! Jen McCabe, of the website HabitLabs.com, told the Sun — as part of its ongoing stenography of Zappos and Tony Hseih’s influence on downtown — that she is moving her operation from Seattle to Las Vegas “to be downtown as they build this healthy-habit community.” AS OPPOSED TO USING IT TO DESCRIBE A SAD CLUTCH OF TENTS IN AN OUT-OF-THEWAY PARKING LOT Occupy LV,a splinter cell of Occupy Las Vegas, wants to trademark the phrase“Occupy Las Vegas.” The move was prompted by a video-game ad that paired the phrase“Occupy Las Vegas”with an image of a gun.If trademarking seems a little at odds with the movement’s anti-corporate philosophy, occupier Mary Underwood said it“is just a bulwark against people using the term in sketchy ways.” IF ADDITIONAL STAPLING HAD BEEN REQUIRED, HE’D BE LOOKING AT DEATH ROW North Las Vegan Robert Walker is facing a $1 million fine and 20 years in prison for ... causing the Golden Nugget extra paperwork? By allegedly lying when he told the casino he wasn’t gambling on behalf of someone else, Walker opened himself to charges of, to quote the Sun, “causing a domestic financial institution to file an inaccurate currency transaction report.”

SOURCES: REVIEW-JOURNAL , SUN , VEGAS INC.

8 CITYLIFE | DECEMBER 8, 2011

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DO THE (GRIM) MATH

Every figure above represents a teacher who might lose his or her job, pending the outcome of arbitration between the school district and the teachers union — as many as 750. Regardless of which side has a better case, that would be an epic brain-drain from a district that doesn’t need it. From students who don’t need it. Here’s hoping arbitration can thread this difficult needle.

GRPAHIC: MAUREEN ADAMO

WHICHEVER; WHAT’S IMPORTANT, CITY OFFICIALS INSIST, IS THAT SOMEONE USED THE PHRASE ‘GET AS FAR AS HE DID’ IN RELATION TO HENDERSON On a 4-0 vote, the Henderson City Council approved the hiring of Josh Reid — yes, one of those Reids — as city attorney, a $199,000-a-year job. Because the position’s requirements were lowered — not to accommodate Reid, officials insist, but to encourage more applicants — some residents smell a rat. Especially since Sen. Harry Reid lobbied on his son’s behalf. (As did powerful figures who backed other applicants.) Asked one Henderson resident,“Did Josh Reid get as far as he did because he’s Harry’s son, or was he really qualified?”


COLUMN

SOCRATES in SODOM

INVITES YOU AND A GUEST TO A SPECIAL ADVANCE SCREENING

BY CHIP MOSHER

Nightmares before Christmas The old Socratic windbag here receives lots of letters seeking advice this time of year. Here is a sample of the scary clutter in my mailbox: TO SOCRATES IN SODOM: As you know, God told me to run for president. But God didn’t tell me there would be nasty jezebels making all these unfounded, nasty sexual allegations about me. For the sake of God, my country and family, I had to drop out of the Republican primary. Do you think I can still get an ambassadorship to Ubeki-beki-bekistan-stan or wherever? — HERMAN CAIN

I WANNA KNOW WHO YOUR TAILOR IS, HERMAN CAIN, SO I CAN GET HOT BABES TO MAKE SEXUAL ALLEGATIONS AGAINST ME. Dear HC: First, I wanna know who your terrific tailor is, so I can get hot babes to make sexual allegations about me. Second, according to the women in my life, President Obama was elected because of his “booty,” and JFK because he was such a man-whore. Why deny anything? Nonetheless, Ubekibeki-wherever might be a good place to chill for a while. God told me that women there are very friendly AND discreet (wink, wink). Keep the faith, my peeps! DEAR SOCRATES: I remember the story about a cocktail waitress slipping in a wet parking garage,and your gubernatorial candidate, Jim Gibbons,while trying to help,accidentally copped a feel from her.Nevada understood his dilemma and elected him governor anyway. Well,I slipped in a shower one day,where someone reportedly witnessed my penis inadvertently“violating”the ass of a young boy I

was horsing around with.And for this I’m stuck with a bum rap.Do you think I’ll get a fair trial? — JERRY SANDUSKY, FORMER PENN STATE ASSISTANT FOOTBALL COACH Dear JS: A man is innocent until proven guilty. If you are found guilty, though, don’t be surprised if someone in the prison shower slips, while horsing around, and inadvertently “violates” your brain through your eyeball with a No. 2 pencil. MISTER SOCRATIC SCUMBUCKET: We are three Amish freedom-fighters from Ohio. We have traveled here in buggies to turn Vegas into an Amish Paradise. We will cut off the beards of all those people making the electricity that lights up this city so sinfully bright. Then we will cut off the beards of the people in that Mormon cult. Then we will cut off your beard, or if you don’t have a beard, your pubic hair, because you believe children should attend that den of iniquity called public high school. Viva la Jakob Ammann! —THREE AMISH AMIGOS Dear TAA: Ah, more hairy terrorism. Just what the world needs. MY BRUTHA EDUCATOR: I just wanted you to know I’ll be putting on blackface and dressing up as black Santa for all the black kids at my academy this year. What do you think? — ANDRE AGASSI Dear AA: Maybe you should pass out Little Black Sambo dolls as gifts while you’re at it. One bit of advice: I wouldn’t let any Amish guys with scissors catch me wearing a Santa beard if I were you. Happy holidays, dear disturbed readers! Ho-ho-ho! CHIP MOSHER teaches in the Clark Clownish School District.

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Please note: Passes received through this promotion do not guarantee you a seat at the theatre. Seating is on a first come, first served basis, except for members of the reviewing press. Theatre is overbooked to ensure a full house. No admittance once screening has begun. All federal, state and local regulations apply. A recipient of tickets assumes any and all risks related to use of ticket, and accepts any restrictions required by ticket provider. Paramount Pictures, Las Vegas City Life and their affiliates accept no responsibility or liability in connection with any loss or accident incurred in connection with use of a prize. Tickets cannot be exchanged, transferred or redeemed for cash, in whole or in part. We are not responsible if, for any reason, recipient is unable to use his/her ticket in whole or in part. All federal and local taxes are the responsibility of the winner. Void where prohibited by law. No purchase necessary. Participating sponsors, their employees and family members and their agencies are not eligible. NO PHONE CALLS! Screening will be held Tuesday, December 13.

IN THEATRES DECEMBER 16 YoungAdultMovie.com

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DECEMBER 8, 2011 | CITYLIFE

9


SLANT COLUMN

KNAPPSTER

BY GEORGE KNAPP

Bankers, anger — and Occupy

A

fter spending six weeks investigating the causes of the foreclosure crisis that has rolled over Nevada, I’ve developed some pretty strong feelings about Wall Street bankers. It is no stretch to say the economic calamity that still has our state in a death grip — as reflected in figures putting us at or near the top in home foreclosures, unemployment, bankruptcies and suicides — is almost entirely the fault of greedy bastards on Wall Street, and the federal regulators who looked the other way. There are those who will tell you this trouble was caused by do-gooders who forced

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10 CITYLIFE | DECEMBER 8, 2011

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banks to give home loans to poor people. There is an old-fashioned term for that line of reasoning: crock of shit. The government did encourage loans to people who otherwise would not have qualified. But there was no requirement that banks write bad loans. There was no requirement that lenders create financial Frankensteins in the form of bundled mortgages — most of them bad mortgages — that were sold as securities, falsely rated as secure investments. There was no requirement they sell these to the tune of trillions of dollars, that they lie to their clients, that they bet against their own

investment advice or that they conceal their It happened to my photog, Matt Adams. treachery with an ocean of fraudulent docuTwice. He needed footage for a project we ments designed to confuse any regulator who are working on, one that will reflect some of might have looked, though none did. the anger I’ve expressed here. Matt explained Bankers did pretty well for themselves. this to the folks who approached him at the They raked in hundreds of billions in bocampsite near UNLV. It did not matter. They nuses, knowing full well a reckoning was just were not going to let him shoot. Every time around the corner. the camera was set, one protester put a sign We regular folks got screwed. Millions in front of the lens. During another attempt, a of jobs vanished. 401(k)’s became 201(k)’s. crazy, booze-soaked knucklehead brandishFamilies once able to afford their monthly ing a stick kept coming at him. There were payments had to surrender everything. Close accusations that all TV people are lackeys of to 170,000 Nevada homeowners have been a corrupt system. Others complained we are foreclosed upon. Let that number sink in. working for the Zionists or other cabals. Nearly 170,000. Most of them got creamed I understand why people are angry. So am I. even though they played by the rules. A group as loose as this, though, needs at least Oh, and to top it off, we got to pay huna measure of focus. A policy for dealing with dreds of billions to bail out the banks that the media … especially sympathetic media caused the trouble. Those banks are right … would make some sense, though the mesback at the trough, raking in bonuses while sages I have sent to those identified as leaders lobbying to relax already-weak regulations. of Occupy LV have never gotten a reply. It is in this context I have tried to view the Economics professor Robert Reich thinks Occupy movement. there are many who want to regress to the The complaint I hear most often is the Gilded Age, when corporate robber barons movement doesn’t have a central, defined made all the decisions and social Darwinmessage. But I think it is ism was the paradigm of easy to express what the the day — every man for IT DOESN’T movement wants: fairness. himself. When I look at the A system in which the rules piss-poor oversight by the HELP THAT SO that apply to us also apply to SEC and the Fed, entities MANY NUTBALLS bankers. I think a lot of the that could have prevented HAVE ATTACHED anger expressed in the 70 the economic holocaust, THEMSELVES TO or so cities where Occupy I see what Reich is saying. folks are active — including Every president back to THE MOVEMENT. Las Vegas — stems from the Reagan has blood on his mess created by Wall Street. hands because they all took That said, I think the loads of dough from Wall Occupy folks — at least the ones here — have Street, and all had a hand in deregulating, done a crappy job of focusing their message privatizing and setting the bankers free. Free and communicating it. It doesn’t help that to steal, that is. so many nutballs have attached themselves The only encouraging news I have seen to the movement. I know, it’s supposed to be has come from the state level, including the loose, decentralized, open to all. If it is going announcement this week that the attorneys to remain that way, then I think it is doomed. general of Nevada and California will work In the newsroom, we get feeds from TV together to put some of these dirty bastards stations all over the country. Many of the in prison. It’s a good thing we have folks like videos show reporters and photographers our AG, Catherine Cortez Masto, working on on the front lines, getting beaten up and octhis stuff, because the federal AG wants to casionally arrested. The coverage has been cut a deal that would give every banker a Get generally — but not exclusively — supportive, Out of Jail Free card. in my view. But you wouldn’t know that from But I suspect if Ms. Masto ventured near the nasty encounters journalists have almost an Occupy event, she would receive the same daily at Occupy sites, including Las Vegas. treatment newspeople have received. If the Photographers have been roughed up, spat movement is going to survive and prosper, it on, cursed at and prevented from doing their needs to figure out who its enemy is. jobs because some overzealous protesters are GEORGE KNAPP is a Peabody Award-winning disgusted by the fact they have jobs at all. I am investigative reporter for KLAS Channel 8. Reach him at not making this up. gknapp@klastv.com.


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DECEMBER 8, 2011 | CITYLIFE

11


THE WEEK

FILE: BILL HUGHES

“Many nights I reside at the Catholic Charities overnight shelter ... some nights I am out under the stars.” (This file photo does not depict the author.)

Man on the street

A first-hand account of life in the homeless corridor

12 CITYLIFE | DECEMBER 8, 2011

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Editor’s note: For the last few weeks, a homeless man we’ll call “Dave” has been sending us dispatches from the so-called Corridor of Hope. We’ve excerpted them here. If some of his stories are hard to confirm independently, together they present a vivid picture of the texture of life in the homeless community.

I

am relatively new to Vegas. Came to town in the summer to get an overhaul on my 55-year-old heart, which was misfiring. Out of Sunrise Hospital I was dumped, so to say, at the Catholic Charities overnight shelter. I am not new to the homeless situation. From resort towns like coastal San Luis Obispo, Calif., to redneck Kingman, Ariz., for 10 years, on and off, I have lived the life of a fringe citizen. Being a newcomer here

allows me to be just a fly on the sidewalk, an observer of the action without being stepped on or noticed, a dirtbag detective incognito who sees, hears and feels the vibes of the poor people on the corridor. A HOMELESS PERSON’S THANKSGIVING PRAYER ... “I hate being a cockroach when turkey is served,” she said. She was our spokesperson.


This gal managed a fast-food restaurant for many years. Living in a Las Vegas tent ghetto with no running water or toilets — we know this feeling. We’re called filthy beggars, sociopaths, derelicts, loiterers, vermin, antisocial, vagrants, lowlifes, roaches. We are every breed: white, brown, red, yellow, black; and every creed: I heard a vagabond Buddhist chant, “Om mani padme um” at the Salvation Army Day Center. My friend Asia greets me every morning with “Namaste!” What we all share is need. A need for food, to feed our addictions, to stay dry and warm during winter, to talk and be in common with our pals. A need for safety and security, a desire to feel significant. For me, in my 50s, one of my needs is to understand how a divorce, plus bankruptcy, a heart attack and a depressive crash landed me at the intersection of Grief and Despair, on skid row — er, the Corridor of Hope. I don’t feel too hopeful sometimes. I have three college degrees, have been successful in corporate America, and now I’m down on the ground like a bug. November 25.No reason for us cockroaches to go hungry. We all need nourishment. Why not dine well with one of the many churches that will offer us a meal? “But I am not a cockroach to be exterminated!,” she says as she gulps more Hurricane Beer. “I’m a human being and thankful I am not in jail.” I USED TO KNOW THE BINIONS Many nights I reside at the Catholic Charities overnight shelter near Main Street and Las Vegas Boulevard with 300 others (some nights I am out under the stars). Once you get in, it’s a lock-down facility, bunks are jail castoffs, no windows, toilets are stainless steel and bomb-proof (no M-80 will blow these crappers off the wall). We line up for our beds all day long — yes, many indigent spend the entire day just sitting on Foremaster Lane, waiting to be given a ticket in. What do these people do all day? Talk about how great a gambler they are and how well they knew the Binion family. Depending on our status, we are in one of three lines for intake: 1) medical — seizures, psych cases who want to kill people or faint at any time, wheelchairs; 2) regulars; 3) newcomers. Upon entry, all of us are breathalyzed for alcohol, but no other drug test is administered. Think about it. In a room about as big as a

basketball court filled with every kind of Tom, Dick and Harriet in drag, from millionaires who speak no Spanish to migrants who speak no English, there is a dynamic — dynamite — ready to explode. Put a redneck KKK type in a bed next to a vato and see what happens. “I’m not sleeping next to a taco-bender! And get that black off my row!” Yes, racism still exists. This doesn’t happen all the time, but you get the picture. THE PEANUT BUTTER AND JELLY SANDWICH REVOLT One night, all inmates are in and assigned bunks, showers are finished by 8 for most

them to open their van doors for sack lunches. Then Grits shows up and parks behind the line, and it is elbows and asses to turn 180 degrees and bum rush his truck. If you are claustrophobic and do not like chaos in motion, stay out of the way. I’m in the middle of the mayhem. I get to the truck and there are a dozen arms stretched over my shoulders, wanting their meal in white Styrofoam boxes, everyone screaming, “Me next!” I get right to the truck and the server says, “No more.” CORRIDOR OF HOPE — OR DOPE “Hey, Joe, how soon can you get me a dozen

THERE IS A GAWDAWFUL AMOUNT OF HUSTLE ON THESE STREETS. people (showers carry on till 9:30 but by then the water is lukewarm at best) — then come the sandwiches, PB&J. A big guy walks up, is handed one, he squishes the bread, studies the meal and goes off the Richter Scale with a temper tantrum from hell: “This is a goddamn lousy excuse for a snack!” He throws it down, stomps on it so hard the bread blows out all over the linoleum floor. He threatens the floor manager with a lifeending statement and is 86’d. He complies; Metro is not called this time. Lights out by 10, although there is always the insomniac who shuffles his deck of cards a hundred times before laying out his solitaire hand. A NORMAL SATURDAY A normal Saturday morning for me and my pals is to venture up to “The Field” on the corners of A Street and McWilliams. Be there by 6:30 a.m. for coffee and bowls of rice and vegetables, plus a very hot sauce. Again, when 200 homeless are gathered, hungry and agitated, anything can happen. More Saturday morning frenzy across the street from Salvation Army: At 9ish, stand in (another!) long line for the eggs-and-grits church man who usually shows up about then. One morning he doesn’t show, the next church group comes up and we get ready for

Xani bars? What’s the cost?” There is very little hope down here on these streets. But there is a lot of narco trafficking. Visit the Corridor Pharmacy, where Lortabs, Oxycontin and Codeine are sold with no prescription. There is a gawdawful amount of hustle on these streets. If you are a customer and need crack cocaine, there’s a salesperson who will supply the goods. The Corridor of Hope logo is a political deception for the local media that is as good as any David Copperfield trick. Let the cops make their arrests, but keep the press away from this ongoing crime scene, or the busts may go national and hurt the gambling business. This vice activity is cruel and harmful to the local mothers and children, who way too often have dads who are part of the illicit activity. Just yesterday I watched a pot buy at lunch time near the Salvation Army entrance. The perp had a baggie of buds worth more than a thousand dollars. I saw this transaction as if I was part of it. There was no care for the “Keystone Kop” (a behind-the-back title for security) who was also in sight of the deal but distracted, watching the commotion of a sandwich giveaway across the street. The seller, though covert, acted in total immunity. I see things like this every day. To be fair to SA and CC security, they know

what they are capable of. At the CC’s overnight shelter on Foremaster Lane, night floor marshals Omar and Jimmy are very eyes- and hands-on, keeping riffraff gone. I know of a half-dozen narco dealers who are 86’d from the properties — come around and so will Metro. This is the way it should be. ‘THERE IS A LOT OF PATHOLOGY DOWN HERE’ Pathology: the study of the origin and progress of disease. My friend is a psychiatrist who sometimes ventures onto Las Vegas’ skid row “to have a gander.” I’ll call him Sigmund. Sig is a down-to-earth guy and very much willing to be in “the mud, the blood and the beer,” to quote Johnny Cash, to observe human nature. He likes me because I have a college degree, have taken anatomy and physiology courses in college and once was an EMT. Between us we are cultural geographers with an emphasis in anthropology. That sounds academic. Just thinking about the Catholic Charities overnight shelter on Foremaster Lane makes my skin crawl: bed bugs, “no see ’em” insects, and last night, a bunk-over neighbor had a serious case of sleep apnea. If you have never experienced someone who wakes up bolt upright, thinking they are drowning or being asphyxiated, you’ve missed one of the most bizarre pathological events. Every 15 minutes or so: snoring, silence, no breathing, panic for air, then a gasp like inhaling a hurricane that reverberates through the entire floor. At one overnight place, epileptics are a dime a dozen. This has Sigmund and I perplexed — why so many seizure patients who fall off their beds and flop on the floor? Also prevalent is Tourettes Syndrome — folks with facial tics who act out in weird ways, with offthe-wall sayings like, “Your mom is a whore and fathered my horse.” I’ve met sick criminals on Owens Avenue walking to Salvation Army. How about the pyromaniac who loves to set fires, sitting on the sidewalk at Owens and Main? There are quite a number of prostitutes and their pimps cruising between Salvation Army and the tent ghettos up there and Catholic Charities and the shanties in the field by the cemetery. Murders, rapists, dirtbag anarchists — even professional gamblers (“I am the best bookmaker in the world!” “So are all of us, that is why we are here!”), we all occupy the corridor. a

DECEMBER 8, 2011 | CITYLIFE

13


THE WEEK

Dear Santa A gift guide for those who need gifts most veryone wants a tablet. iPads, Kindles, Androids, Playbooks — if it has a screen, it’s on a wish list.But what if you can’t afford an app, much less a tablet, and don’t even have a place to plug it in? Many of our neighbors have hit hard times in the last few years. Think YOUR of them when GENEROSITY you’re stuffing your loved ones’ MAY KEEP A stockings with PERSON OR gadgets. After all, ANIMAL OFF this isn’t just the season for mindTHE STREET. less consumption — the holidays also inspire generosity. Or at least they should. Don’t satisfy that urge by unloading your pocket change on the next disheveled person with a cardboard sign. Advocate Linda Lera-Randle El says there are better ways to make sure the homeless are warm and fed this holiday season. “If you want to make sure they’re getting

PHOTOS: BILL HUGHES

E

BY AMY KINGSLEY

Adopting a pet at Christmas instead of buying one keeps a furry friend off the streets.

Gloves, scarves, hats and lip balm provide protection from the elements when the homeless can’t escape the cold.

something to eat, give them coupon books to somewhere nearby,” she says. Cash is nice, but an addict might not spend it on food. Blanket drives also crop up with the onset of cold weather. But blankets aren’t the most practical gift for someone living on the street, where camping is banned. Ditto for tents,

ANOTHER REASON, IF YOU NEEDED ONE, TO HOIST AN ASS JUICE

GET THIS You’re not gonna believe what we heard this week

Sometime on or near Dec. 15, the Double Down Saloon will serve its 1 millionth shot of Ass Juice, its secret-recipe signature drink. “The lucky millionth drunk will be cheered with a toast and given an array of prizes, including a snowboard, free tattoos and an all-expense-paid trip to Las Vegas,” says P Moss, the bar’s owner. The mounting tally of Ass Juice sales is updated daily on the bar’s Facebook page. When it becomes clear the millionth shot will almost surely be sold the next day, the Double Down will announce that anyone who orders Ass Juice that day will receive a raffle ticket; once the lucky shot is sold, 10 tickets will be drawn for additional prizes. We know what you’re thinking: P Moss, how did Ass Juice come about? “We started serving Ass Juice in 1993, when a liquor company promotion for a Jager knockoff went so wrong I couldn’t even give the stuff away. It tasted so rancid even bums refused to drink it. So I put up a sign calling it Ass Juice and it sold out almost immediately. I started making my own Ass Juice, and the rest is history.” The bar recently came out with a special Ass Juice toilet shot glass, complete, Moss says, “with a surprise inside.” SCOTT DICKENSHEETS

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sleeping bags, foam pads and other outdoorsy accoutrements. The homeless need nice, heavy jackets — the kind that hunters use — with lots of pockets. Hand-warmers are nice, as are scarves, gloves, knit caps, face-warmers, thick socks and good shoes. And the home-

OCCUPY THE WATER BONG

There’s more unrest at Area 99, the airport-adjacent headquarters of Occupy Las Vegas. As more homeless move in, leaders are wondering what to do about drugs and theft at the asphalt campsite. A very vocal faction of pot proponents shot down a proposal to allow random tent searches by Occupy security. The group’s grab-bag politics aren’t helping. About a dozen active Occupiers have adopted the repeal of marijuana laws as their top issue, according to Johnathan Abbinett. Keeping the camp orderly and sober is a little further down the list. AMY KINGSLEY

less also need things to protect exposed skin, like Chapstick, Vaseline and sun block. Of course, the best way to keep someone warm is to get them inside. Some people will always end up on the street, Lera-Randle El says, but there are organizations that work hard to provide shelter for anyone who will take it. Lera-Randle El’s group, Straight from the Streets, is one. So are the Salvation Army, Catholic Charities and the Shade Tree shelter for women and children. The money you give to those organizations will help keep people safe and warm this winter. In other words, give that pocket change to the Salvation Army bell ringer, not the pan handler. The homeless aren’t the only ones in need. Leslie Carmine, director of communications for Catholic Charities, says the organization has seen a 25 percent increase in the number of first-time clients. People who have never needed help before are suddenly showing up at its offices. Many have homes but can’t afford fixings for a holiday meal. “It’s kind of scary to see all these people showing up for the first time,” Carmine said. “But at least we are here to help them.” Catholic Charities also serves seniors, a group that’s often forgotten in a holiday season that’s geared toward kids. Old folks who can’t leave their homes often want a stack of blank holiday cards with stamped envelopes so they can keep in touch with loved ones. There are plenty of toy drives this season for kids in need. They also need coats and shoes. But if you really want to make a kid’s holiday, consider adopting a teen from the Nevada Partnership for Homeless Youth. At an age where most kids are whining for cars and video-game consoles, these kids’ wish

NO FREE RIDES

The Designated Drivers Foundation lost $20,000 in state funding this year that used to pay for free rides during the holidays. Fortunately, State Farm pledged $10,000 toward the program, and the group is trying to raise the rest with yard sales. They had several of them during the last month, and they’ll hold another near the end of the year, said Designated Drivers CEO Billie Smith. Hopefully they can move enough used floor lamps and baby clothes and Ab Scissors to revive the program for New Year’s Eve. Because a car accident and a night in jail is a bad way to start the year. AMY KINGSLEY


lists include things like knitting supplies, jobs and new socks. There are other agencies in town with their own needs for the holiday season. Three Square is accepting donations of food and money, and will help you organize a holiday food drive. Shade Tree is always accepting supplies for women and children, including diapers, formula, feminine products, toys, pacifiers, vampire books for teen girls and body spray for the boys. If you want a more personal relationship with the recipients of your holiday gifts, you can Adopt-a-Family through HELP of Southern Nevada. Need is high and supply is short. The agency had to hustle to get enough turkeys for its Thanksgiving program. They’ll probably need more at Christmas, too. Gift cards may make awful presents for immediate family members, but they’re great for families in need. Here’s another awful gift: pets. Children may beg for a dog, and then turn out to be terrible owners. A fluffy baby animal from the pet store may have a poor quality, puppy-mill heritage, with all the vet bills and behavioral problems that go along with it. So why not take a trial run and make an animal’s holiday season? Foreclosed Upon Pets needs foster families for abandoned cats and dogs. You can keep the animal, or give it to another owner if it doesn’t work out. Your generosity may keep another person or animal off the street this winter. And that should warm your heart. Tablets can do a lot of things, but they still don’t have an app for that.

VENI, VIDI, VIRTUAL Two writers conquer a digital scavenger hunt on the Strip BY SARAH JANE WOODALL

AS A SELF-EMPLOYED HACK with an aversion to having a “real” job, I’m constantly on the lookout for money-making schemes. From eating competitions to focus groups, if I can make a buck without having to sign a W-2, I’m there. So you can imagine my delight when I learned Downy fabric softener was sponsoring a scavenger hunt on the Strip — with a $20,000 grand prize! A fellow writer from a rival publication proposed we join forces. This guy — we’ll call him “Rick” — is classic Type-A: cocky, driven, MENSA. Out of all of his 50,000 Facebook friends, he chose me as a teammate because of my game-show pedigree (Jeopardy! and Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?) and fiercely competitive nature. So on Saturday, we set aside our differences in the name of taking Downy for $20,000. We knew we’d need a solid strategy to win, butDownykeptatightlidonthedetails,leaving ustospeculateastowhatinformationwemight needcomegameday.MyType-Ateammateinsisted on meeting at Starbucks for a last-minute cramming session the night before, boning up on Vegas history and all things Downy. Whatever! As he banged away at his MacBook, muttering about Roman gods and the Rat Pack, I poured a healthy slug of peppermint schnapps into my hot cocoa and cultivated the Zen-like

FACEBOOK QUESTION OF THE WEEK

WE SPRINTED FROM PLACE TO PLACE, FRETTING AND BICKERING AND WORKING UP A SWEAT.

After downloading the SCVNGR mobile app and waiting for the countdown,we dashed out to the street and commenced a frenzied, two-hour dash from hotel to hotel — from the Venetian to MGM, and then from New YorkNew York to Treasure Island, a total distance of more than three miles. The game entailed completing as many challenges as possible in the allotted time — but in the event of a tie, the fastest team would win. So we hustled. Barreling down the sidewalk in my completely impractical Uggs, the tables turned: Now I went all Type-A, urging my wheezing

LISTEN TO THE CHILDREN

Complete this sentence: The Occupy movement is ...

... in trouble because the Senate passed the new bill indefinitely suspending habeas corpus. (Sylvia Annexstein) ...backwards.WhileIsupporttheideas,I don’t see what substantial results will come from the loitering. Occupying a job or a school would set a much better example to a future generation, I think. All this is doing is extending the feelings of entitlement to our kids and teaching them that when they don’t have money they should go complain tosomebodyelseaboutitandavoidinfluencingchange the right way. People need to stop whining about rich people and realize there’s an entrepreneur in all of us. Invent and innovate instead of spending energy on destruction. (Kane Churko) ... cold. (Kaity Mohler Jones)

buzz that hasn’t failed me yet. On competition day, we sized up the other 500 contestants who’d signed up for the free event: a daunting crowd, but neither of us recognized anyone … which suggested they were outof-towners who wouldn’t know the ins-andouts of the Strip and its various bridges and shortcuts. Advantage: us! Having navigated the boulevard for years, Rick and I are extraordinarily adept at weaving through throngs of drunken tourists. So far, so good.

teammate (who was hampered by a pair of illfitting, testicle-chafing jeans) to hurry up. The challenges were things like, Go to the North Pole window display at Sugar Factory. Count the elves, and subtract from the number of gifts, and enter the result into the app. We sprinted from place to place, fretting and bickering and working up quite a sweat. By the end I was exhausted, but not too tired to poke fun at MENSA Boy, who waited for the results in tense agony. Trying to lighten the mood, I noted the beautiful sunny weather: “Hey, even if we don’t win, at least we got a great workout ... and had fun!” “Fun? Fun?!”To some people,second place is nothing more than first loser. But considering second prize in this scavenger hunt was nothing more than a free night at the Bellagio, I was inclined to side with my teammate. Now I was nervous. As it happened, we had nothing to worry about. Author and actress Amy Sedaris, who hosted the game, announced the winners at the post-game reception inside the Bank nightclub. We won! For running up and down the Strip like crazed idiots for two hours, we had earned a cool $10,000 apiece. After the hollering and whooping died down, all was well between my teammate and I. His strengths made up for my weaknesses, and vice versa; we made a pretty good team. Now, if I can just convince him to try The Amazing Race ...

...about raising awareness of the monetary inequality in American society and the misdistribution of tax dollars (i.e., bank bailouts). They’ve done that. I’m aware. Now, will you tent-pitching fucks do something about it instead of just complaining? Because if you don’t, you’re just human awareness ribbons. Let’s get productive, people. (TJ Fogarty) ... an admittedly diffuse, fledgling, rumble-before-the-storm response. And anyone who dismisses it with “invent and innovate,” “entrepreneur in all of us” rhetoric is, along with being terrifyingly out-of-touch, certainly a good little mouthpiece for the astonishingly wealthy plutocrats who’ve brought us the far more streamlined Fuck You American Peasants Movement. (Dave Surratt)

If a tiny cop knocks on your door next Nevada Day, don’t be alarmed. He’s only looking for toilet paper. Recently, the Foothills Montessori School in Henderson held an essay contest entitled, “If I were mayor ...” in which students dreamed up ways to improve the city. Fifth-graders Isabella Mitchell and Miranda Derossi had winning ideas, including community-supported agriculture, a charitable costume holiday and a way to keep the jobless on the streets. Isabella writes: “If I was mayor of Henderson, I would build a city garden. People who want a plot can pay for their share. I would also make a day called Hallohelp, the day after Halloween on November 1st ... where kids dress up like a civil servant in the community (example: police, fireman or even a doctor). Kids would go door to door and collect toiletries, blankets and canned foods. The collection would be donated to the needy.” Miranda writes: “... Are people losing jobs? Not a problem! I would hire a conglomeration of citizens who had lost their jobs to help clean our city and recycle or trash any loose garbage they found in the streets. I would budget my money wisely, and donate a generous amount for a shelter to keep homeless people and animals off our roads ... Henderson forever!” KRISTY TOTTEN a

DECEMBER 8, 2011 | CITYLIFE

15


MUSIC

Zach Ryan, new band in tow, gets to the heart of the matter — his heart

PHOTO: STEPHANIE GONZALES

Zach Ryan, center, and Aly Una

GETTING PERSONAL BY MAX PLENKE

There’s a directly correlative relationship between Zach Ryan’s music and his clothing. We’ve seen him in Beatles/Bowie buttonedup suits and a shaven face during his tenure with The Rooks. We watched as ’70s power

16 CITYLIFE | DECEMBER 8, 2011

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pop started sinking its teeth in, turning him ragged-faced and wife-beater-donned. And on a recent Thursday morning, as he tries to fit his Jolly Pale Giant body onto a couch at The Beat coffeehouse, we catch him in all black Western wear, an outfit you’d expect of a posse member in a Clint Eastwood flick. It

“I wanted to write something that mattered more to me.” ZACH RYAN

marks a noticeably twangier, southern rock sound as Zach Ryan, until recently known as Zach Ryan and the Rouge, brings Americana to his set lists and closet. “I got tired of trying to write straight pop songs,” Ryan says, trying to shake his eye bags with a small coffee. “I wanted to write some-

thing that mattered more to me. I found myself explaining songs as being written from a hypothetical standpoint. But I don’t want to write fromahypotheticalstandpointanymore.These songs directly correlate with my life or past.” The progression to a more honest, Springsteenian sound was almost inevitable. The


dude already had the cowboy boots and a love of Bob Dylan, and the ’70s rock of The Rooks made his style too heavy to be some tambourine man. At his Bunkhouse show two days after the coffeeshop chat, he’s practically undergoing a Springsteen possession onstage, his song “Wake Up Call” fitting The Boss’ “I’m Going Down” vibe, just with Rhodes keyboard riff complements. It feels like Americana, the kind of music found on the stereo of someone you’d call a ramblin’ man (Ryan’s song “Terrible Town,” especially). In fact, the band’s upcoming E.P., Terrible Town, follows the ramblin’ theme, however subtly. There are three songs about Ryan’s current home, Las Vegas, in a literal sense. Another is about his old home in small-town Oregon. He closes with a love song — a sort of emotional home (whether or not he’d phrase it that way). “I’ve always stayed single and always have friends who are busy, so I’m alone a lot,” he says about the album’s concept. “I think I was focusing on that more, noticing it more when I wrote these songs. It’s about the past and where my life is going.” At the Bunkhouse, he’s wearing that same posse ensemble, but without the sleepyeyes.Nowhe’sgrinning,spitting up pieces of his heart onto the microphone with every strumming chorus. He’s optimistic. For the past month, he and his bandmates — Ali Una on bass, Dan Conway on drums, Steve Ardri on keys — have spent every nonwork waking moment putting together their five-track debut to the sonic universe, opting out of engineering their musical blemishes, instead spending that time to nail the track better. It’s harder work, takes more self-scrutiny and risks getting sloppy, since Ryan wants this album finished for Christmas. Tonight you can see that effort coming to fruition in meticulously rehearsed songs. Onstage, Ryan looks like a kid with a crush. And maybe that’s what he has for this band, and how comfortable he feels in front of them. “It’s like dating,” he says. “You have to go through a lot of players to find who works for you. I’ve been dating for a while, and now I have a band I like. There’s a really good feeling when we’re all together.”

Dr. Feelgood’s temporary home WATCH THE THRONE TOUR THIS WEEKEND, two pillars of rap music take the stage together as part of the Watch the Throne Tour. We looked to Jay-Z and Kanye West’s separate but equally inspiring literary projects (Jay-Z’s memoir, Decoded, and Kanye’s real-time memoir, @kanyewest) for their takes on... Careers JAY: “I couldn’t even think about wanting to be something else; I wouldn’t let myself visualize another life. But I wrote because I couldn’t stop. It was a release, a mental exercise, a way of keeping sane.” KANYE:“Office clothes are the shit.” Apprehension JAY: “Fear is a waste of time.” KANYE: “I KNOW IT’S COLD AS FUK OUT THERE ... THE GRASS FEEL LIKE CONCRETE” Communication JAY: “We change people through conversation, not through censorship.” KANYE: “Avatar on the 13 foot screen ....wuuuuu uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut!!!!!” The pitfalls of being rich JAY: “[T]hetruthisyoudon’tneedsomeexternal demon to take control of you to turn you into a raging, money-obsessed sociopath, you only need to let loose the demons you already have inside of you.” KANYE: “Furpillowsarehardtoactuallysleepon.” Being a rapper JAY:“Rappers,asaclass,arenotengagedinanythingcriminal.They’remusicians.Somerappersand friends of rappers commit crimes. Some bus drivers commit crimes. Some accountants commit crimes. But there aren’t task forces devoted to bus drivers or accountants. Bus drivers don’t have to work under the preemptive suspicion of law enforcement. The difference is obvious, of course: Rappers are young black men telling stories that the police, among others, don’t want to hear.” KANYE: “I just threw some kazoo on this bitch.”

Finally: a hard-rock residency at the Hard Rock venue

M

otley Crüe confirmed last week it’ll hole up in the Hard Rock Hotel for a three-week, 12-show residency beginning Feb. 3. “It’s going to be just overthe-top craziness,” said Crüe frontman and Vegas resident Vince Neil during a Wednesday teleconference. “Since it’s a stationary show … we can do all kinds of stuff that we’ve only really dreamed about.” As far as those dreams go, the guys didn’t get specific, besides repeating keywords like CRAZY and NAKED and THE CRÜE — though they definitely won’t have jugglers onstage (deal-breaker). The cool part here is that, whether you’re a Crüe fan or not, this is the first hard rock residency to hit Las Vegas — and we aren’t counting Steel Panther or Santana. “Doing a residency is just pretty much a dream come true,” Neil said. “I think it really opens the doors for other bands.” As of press time, the band hadn’t confirmed nor denied plans to extend the residency beyond the initial three weeks. It certainly doesn’t mean Motley Crüe will slow down. In fact, when asked if they’re following the historical “grab a residency/do nothing else” road map used by other present and past headliner residents, they finally got a little sensitive. “No! Where have you been?” Neil demanded. “I think [we’re] at our peak and this is just a creative experience for us … it [has] nothing to do with any kind of popularity.” And good for them. We’ll believe it when the next album comes out. MAX PLENKE

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DECEMBER 8, 2011 | CITYLIFE

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FILM CINELIST Recommended. Compiled by CityLife staff. Send event information to: Mike Prevatt at listings@lvcitylife.com. SUBMISSIONS MUST BE RECEIVED BY 5 P.M. ON THE THURSDAY PRIOR TO PUBLICATION, AND EVENTS MUST BE OPEN TO THE PUBLIC. PLEASE INCLUDE NAME, PHONE NUMBER AND ADDRESS OF THE EVENT. EVENTS ARE SUBJECT TO LAST-MINUTE CHANGES. PLEASE CALL CONTACT NUMBERS TO CONFIRM DETAILS.

NEW RELEASES GAINSBOURG: A HEROIC LIFE (NR, 122 mins) The

story of Jewish singer-songwriter Serge Gainsbourg (Eric Elmosnino), from his childhood in Nazioccupied Paris to his eventual pop superstardom. Village Square THE GREATEST MIRACLE 3D (PG, 70 mins) Faith in Catholicism is tested and upheld in the case of three church members. Opens wide. LADIES VS. RICKY BAHL (NR) Conman Ricky Bahl (Ranveer Singh) meets his match when the women he conned out of their money meet and form an alliance to get him back. Indian. Village Square MOZART’S SISTER (NR, 120 mins) Maria Anna Mozart (Marie Feret), the older sister of Wolfgang, confronts the social order as she nears marrying age and is no longer allowed to carry out her violin prodigy destiny. Village Square

TOWN SQUARE 18 I-15 I-15 & & 215 215 (LV (LV BLVD. BLVD. EXIT) EXIT) Voted Best of Las Vegas 2011 by Review-Journal Readers

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ravereserved NOW AVAILABLE! Get Your Holiday Gift Cards Now! see box office or ravecinemas.com

$6 TUESDAYS all shows, all times* $6 EARLYBIRD 1st matinees before 2pm* *upcharges apply

Showtimes for Friday 12/9 ONLY THE SITTER RESERvEd 21YRS+ (R) 8:45p, 10:55p NEW YEAR’S EvE 21YRS+ (PG-13) 8:15p, 9:45p GREATEST MIRACLE 3d (PG) 11:30a, 1:55p, 4:05p, 6:00p, 8:00p NEW YEAR’S EvE (PG-13) 10:40a, 12:05p, 1:20p, 2:45p, 4:00p, 5:35p, 7:00p, 8:35p, 10:00p, 11:20p THE SITTER (R) 10:50a, 11:45a, 1:00p, 2:00p, 3:10p, 4:15p, 5:25p, 6:30p, 7:40p, 9:20p, 10:05p, 11:25p, 11:59p THE dESCENdANTS (R) 10:45a, 11:25a, 2:05p, 4:50p, 7:30p, 10:35p HUGO 3d (PG) 1:25p, 4:25p, 7:15p, 10:10p HUGO (PG) 2:55p, 5:50p, 8:40p, 11:30p ARTHUR CHRISTMAS (PG) 10:45a, 1:10p, 3:35p, 6:45p, 9:10p MUPPETS (PG) 11:15a, 2:30p, 5:15p, 8:10p, 10:45p HAPPY FEET (PG) 12:55p, 3:20p, 6:35p, 8:55p TWILIGHT BREAKING dAWN PART 1 (PG-13) 10:55a, 12:45p, 1:45p, 3:45p, 4:35p, 6:40p, 7:35p, 9:25p, 10:25p, 11:59p J EdGAR (R) 11:10a IMMORTALS 3d (R) 12:25p, 3:05p, 5:45p, 8:30p, 11:10p JACK ANd JILL (PG) 11:50a, 2:15p, 4:40p, 7:05p, 11:30p A vERY HAROLd ANd KUMAR 3d CHRISTMAS (R) 6:30p, 11:15p TOWER HEIST (PG-13) 11:55a, 2:25p, 5:10p, 7:55p, 10:30p PUSS IN BOOTS (PG) 11:20a, 1:35p, 4:20p LIKE CRAZY (PG-13) 12:20p, 2:35p, 4:55p, 7:20p, 9:50p, 11:59p *Denotes special engagement (no passes)

Group Sales & Events Call 866-878-7068 ravecinemas.com

18 CITYLIFE | DECEMBER 8, 2011

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GAINSBOURG : “This didn’t work on Elton John.” (Screens at Village Square) NEW YEAR’S EVE (PG-13, 118 mins) Lives inter-

twine in romance and heartbreak on a New Year’s Eve in New York City. We’ll stick to the Vegas version, thank you. Opens wide. THE SITTER (R, 81 mins) An unqualified babysitter (Jonah Hill) winds up taking the kids he’s supposed to watch to New York City. Opens wide.

NOW PLAYING

50/50 (R, 99 mins) More of a comedy than a dramedy, this Jonathan Levine cancer film doesn’t hit you over the head with the preciousness of most movies on the topic. It has some mesmerizing sequences, and the understated, naturally likable acting of Joseph Gordon-Levitt. (MK: 09.29.11) Tropicana ANONYMOUS (PG-13, 130 mins) Set in the Elizabethan Era, a long unanswered question is posed: Who actually wrote the work credited to William Shakespeare? The answer might be among the lustful actions, greedy scheming, and illicit actions that occurred on- and offstage. Village Square, Colonnade ARTHUR CHRISTMAS (PG, 100 mins) Arthur (voice by James McAvoy) rushes to deliver gifts to a young girl his father, Santa Claus, forgot on his Christmas Eve route. THE DESCENDANTS (R, 115 mins) Hawaiian attorney and narrator Matt (soulfully played by George Clooney) must repeatedly break the news his wife (Patricia Hastie) is never going to wake up from her coma, as well as oversee the sale of 30,000 acres of pristine land that’s been in the family since the 1860s. Alexander Payne’s naturalist style and combination of setting and casting sets his film apart. It’s his best yet. (MK: 12.01.11) Village Square, Green Valley Ranch

DOLPHIN TALE (PG, 113 mins) A true story about

a dolphin named Winter who loses her tail in a crab trap. But when rescued, she benefits from care that could also help countless other people. Tropicana HAPPY FEET 2 (PG, 99 mins) Little emperor penguin, Erik (voiced by Ava Acres), can’t dance (like his father) or fly (like the cool, new penguin in town), but that won’t stop him from trying to save his fellow webbed-feet when their environment is threatened. THE HELP (PG-13, 137 mins) Skeeter (Emma Stone), Aibileen (Viola Davis) and Minny (Octavia Spencer) form a daring friendship in Mississippi during the 1960s. The Help gives off a scent of Spielbergian sisterhood sappiness from a mile away. But new director Tate Taylor gives it the right touch. And the cast gels as an ensemble brings the film to life without letting its themes overshadow its characters. (MK: 08.11.11) Tropicana HUGO (PG, 127 mins) Young Hugo (Asa Butterfield) works in a Parisian train depot, where he befriends toy salesman — and landmark filmmaker — Georges Melies (Ben Kingsley). Soon, the narrative stops cold and film-appreciation class begins. Martin Scorsese’s fantastical 3D picture is as close to his heart as anything he’s directed. (MK: 11.24.11) IDES OF MARCH (R, 101 mins) A governor (George Clooney, who also directs) is a populist presidential candidate guided by Paul Zara (Philip Seymour Hoffman) and a press spokesman (Ryan Gosling), who makes that one small compromise that threatens his career and the campaign. This political thriller has slight overtones of classic Shakespearean plays and references to many political headlines, causing the storyline to blur at times. MK (10.07.11) Suncoast IMMORTALS (R, 110 mins) King Hyperion (Mickey Rourke) and his army search for the invincible bow that will assist him in overthrowing the Gods on

Mount Olympus. But Theseus (Henry Cavill) vows to avenge his mother’s death caused by the evil king, leading to a battle of epic proportions. IN TIME (PG-13 109 mins) A futuristic Robin Hood-type tale where time is money, literally. Will Sallas (Timberlake) tries to tip the unfair scales of wealth more towards the working class and out of the hands of the fat cats. The metaphor is a little heavy-handed, but the metaphor is, pardon the pun, timely. (CB: 10.27.11) J. EDGAR (R, 137 mins ) About the FBI mastermind’s rise to power, his Electra complex and his greatest fears. In the hands of Clint Eastwood and with the appalling casting of Leonardo DiCaprio as Hoover, the mission fails. A far more linear narrative might’ve saved the film. (MK: 11.10.11) JACK AND JILL (PG, 93 mins) Jack (Adam Sandler) hates Thanksgiving because that’s when his twin sister Jill (also Sandler) comes to visit. This time her stay is extended to appease Al Pacino (playing himself), who has gained feelings for her. LIKE CRAZY (PG-13, 89 mins) A younger and more dramatic (500) Days of Summer, Like Crazy begins and ends with the lovers themselves. A relationship between Jacob (Anton Yelchin) and Anna (Felicity Jones) blossoms unlike any other, until an expired visa sends Anna back to her native England. Like Crazy is so good where a movie like this really matters that the title is ultimately forgivable. (CB: 11.24.11) Rave Town Square MARTHA MARCY MAY MARLENE (R, 120 mins) Fragile and paranoid Martha (Elizabeth Olsen) ditches a cult for good old-fashioned family life, but has trouble distinguishing dream from reality, empowerment from mental enslavement. There have been few narratives that have fallen as frustratingly flat as writer/director Sean Durkin’s story, and the “you decide how it ends” ending cheats the audience. (MK: 11.10.11) Suncoast MIDNIGHT IN PARIS (PG-13, 100 mins) Gil (Owen Wilson) and fiancee Inez (Rachel McAdams) discover the art scene of Paris while struggling with notions of “what-if” in this charming but meaningless romantic comedy. (KC: 06.09.11) Colonnade MONEYBALL (PG-13, 133 mins) Based on a true story, Billy Beane (Brad Pitt), uses an unorthodox statistical approach to forming a baseball team for the Oakland A’s 2002 season. Moneyball doesn’t use the typical rah-rah sports narrative. But Beane is a fantastically well-written role, giving Pitt one of the best opportunities to show what he can do. (CB: 09.22.11) Village Square THE MUPPETS (PG, 98 mins) Director James Bobin and screenwriters Nicholas Stoller and Jason Segel (who also stars here) too great care to honor the legacy of the late Jim Henson’s famous television/movie puppets, while still devising a concept fresh enough to warrant their reappearance: Fans try and reunite the Muppets so they may save their decrepit studio, which leads to a big benefit show. Energetic, enthusiastic and consistently entertaining. (MP: 11.24.11)


INVITES YOU AND A GUEST TO THE BIGGEST ACTION FILM OF THE SEASON!

CENTURY SOUTH POINT

9777 Las Vegas Blvd. at Silverado Ranch Rd • Exp Code 989#

CERTIFIED • FIRST MATINEE SHOWTIME (7 DAYS A WEEK) $7.00 • ADULT MATINEES BEFORE 6PM $8.00

NEW YEAR’S EVE - XD (XD Premium Applies) [PG13] 135 420 705 950 THE SITTER - XD (XD Premium Applies) [R] 1200 210 420 630 840 1050 ARTHUR CHRISTMAS - REAL D 3D ($3.25 SURCHARGE) [PG] 210 700 HUGO - REAL D 3D ($3.25 SURCHARGE) [PG]115 405 710 1005 IMMORTALS - REAL D 3D ($3.25 SURCHARGE) [R] i 1205 240 515 750 1035 NEW YEAR’S EVE [PG13]1240 230 325 515 610 800 855 1045 THE SITTER [R] i105 315 525 735 945 ARTHUR CHRISTMAS [PG]1145 435 925 HAPPY FEET TWO [PG]1230 255 520 745 1015

HUGO [PG]1150 245 540 835 J. EDGAR [R] i1130AM JACK AND JILL [PG]1135 150 410 625 840 1055 THE MUPPETS [PG]1210 250 530 810 1050 THE DESCENDANTS [R] i1215 255 535 815 1055 TOWER HEIST [PG13]1155 235 505 740 1010 TWILIGHT SAGA: BREAKING DAWN[PG13] 1140 100 225 345 510 630 755 915 1040

CENTURY 16 SANTA FE STATION

4949 North Rancho Dr • Exp Code 986#

CERTIFIED • FIRST MATINEE SHOWTIME (7 DAYS A WEEK) $7.00 • ADULT MATINEES BEFORE 6PM $8.00

ARTHUR CHRISTMAS - REAL D 3D ($3.25 SURCHARGE) [PG] 1135 205 435 700 935 HUGO - REAL D 3D ($3.25 SURCHARGE) [PG] 150 445 740 1035 NEW YEAR’S EVE [PG13] 1050 1145 1240 135 230 325 420 515 615 705 800 905 950 1045 THE SITTER [R] i1045 1155 100 205 315 425 530 645 745 900 1000 ARTHUR CHRISTMAS [PG]1235 305 535 805 1030 HAPPY FEET TWO [PG]1205 235 505 730 955

HUGO [PG]1055AM IMMORTALS [R] i1115 150 440 720 1005 J. EDGAR [R] i940PM JACK AND JILL[PG]1140 210 430 650 925 PUSS IN BOOTS [PG]1210 230 500 725 THE MUPPETS [PG]1105 145 420 655 930 TOWER HEIST [PG13]1130 200 435 715 945 TWILIGHT SAGA: BREAKING DAWN [PG13] 1100 1200 155 255 445 545 735 835 1025

CENTURY 18 ORLEANS

4500 West Tropicana Blvd. • Exp Code 946#

CERTIFIED • FIRST MATINEE SHOWTIME (7 DAYS A WEEK) $7.00 • ADULT MATINEES BEFORE 6PM $8.00

HUGO - REAL D 3D ($3.25 SURCHARGE) [PG]1135 240 540 835

IN TIME [PG13]720 1000

IMMORTALS - REAL D 3D ($3.25 SURCHARGE) [R] i

J. EDGAR [R] i1225 335 650 955

1255 345 625 910

JACK AND JILL [PG]1240 305 525 750 1010

NEW YEAR’S EVE [PG13]1130 1245 215 330 500 620 745 905 1030 THE SITTER [R] i1130 1235 140 245 350 455 600 705 810 915 1020 ARTHUR CHRISTMAS [PG]1140 205 430 655 920

PUSS IN BOOTS [PG]1200 230 450 THE MUPPETS [PG]1150 105 225 340 505 615 740 855 1015

HAPPY FEET TWO[PG]1155 220 445 715 945

TOWER HEIST [PG13]1210 240 515 755 1025

HUGO [PG]110 410 710 1005

TWILIGHT SAGA: BREAKING DAWN [PG13]

IMMORTALS [R] i1145 235 510 755 1030

1205 130 250 415 535 700 820 950

CENTURY 18 SAM’S TOWN

5111 Boulder Highway, In The Casino • Exp Code 945#

CERTIFIED • FIRST MATINEE SHOWTIME (7 DAYS A WEEK) $7.00 • ADULT MATINEES BEFORE 6PM $8.00

THE GREATEST MIRACLE - REAL D 3D ($3.25 SURCHARGE) [PG] 1135 140 345 550 755 1000 ARTHUR CHRISTMAS - REAL D 3D ($3.25 SURCHARGE) [PG] 1135 115 205 435 705 845 935 PUSS IN BOOTS - REAL D 3D ($3.25 SURCHARGE) [PG] 1205 225 445 705 925 THE SITTER [R] i1130 1235 110 140 245 320 350 455 530 600 705 740 810 915 950 1020

CENTURY 12 HENDERSON

TO BE ENTERED FOR A CHANCE TO WIN A PASS FOR TWO, VISIT

LVCITYLIFE.COM

Screening will be held Thursday, December 15 at Regal Red Rock, 7pm THIS FILM IS RATED PG-13. Some Material May Be Inappropriate For Children Under 13. Please note: Passes received through this promotion do not guarantee you a seat at the theatre. Seating is on a first come, first served basis, except for members of the reviewing press. Theatre is overbooked to ensure a full house. No admittance once screening has begun. All federal, state and local regulations apply. A recipient of tickets assumes any and all risks related to use of ticket, and accepts any restrictions required by ticket provider. Paramount Pictures, Las Vegas City Life and their affiliates accept no responsibility or liability in connection with any loss or accident incurred in connection with use of a prize. Tickets cannot be exchanged, transferred or redeemed for cash, in whole or in part. We are not responsible if, for any reason, recipient is unable to use his/her ticket in whole or in part. All federal and local taxes are the responsibility of the winner. Void where prohibited by law. No purchase necessary. Participating sponsors, their employees and family members and their agencies are not eligible. NO PHONE CALLS!

IN THEATERS DECEMBER 16 www.MissionImpossible.com

851 S. Boulder HWY at Greenway Rd • Exp Code 958# CERTIFIED • ADULT MATINEES DAILY

HAPPY FEET TWO [PG]1135 205 435 705 935 IMMORTALS [R] i1140 215 450 725 1000 J. EDGAR [R] i700 1005 JACK AND JILL [PG]1200 220 440 710 930 THE MUPPETS [PG]1205 135 245 415 525 805 TWILIGHT SAGA: BREAKING DAWN [PG13] 1145 120 245 410 535 700 825 950

HUGO - REAL D 3D ($3.25 SURCHARGE) [PG]200 730 ARTHUR CHRISTMAS - REAL D 3D ($3.25 SURCHARGE) [PG] 100 330 605 830 HUGO [PG]1100 430 955 NEW YEAR’S EVE [PG13]1105 150 435 720 1005 THE SITTER [R] i1055 105 315 530 740 1000 ARTHUR CHRISTMAS [PG]1120 145 420 650 925

CENTURY SUNCOAST 16

THE DESCENDANTS [R] i1200 235 510 745 1030 ARTHUR CHRISTMAS [PG]1225 255 345 525 615 755 1025 J. EDGAR [R] i1250 355 700 1005 PUSS IN BOOTS [PG]1240 300 520 740 1000 REAL STEEL [PG13]1235 335 635 935 TOWER HEIST [PG13]1130 215 500 745 1030 TWILIGHT SAGA: BREAKING DAWN [PG13]1130 1200 1240 120 150 220 250 330 410 440 510 540 620 700 730 800 830 910 950 1020

9090 Alta Dr. & Rampart in the Suncoast Resort • Exp Code 947#

CERTIFIED • FIRST MATINEE SHOWTIME (7 DAYS A WEEK) $7.00 • ADULT MATINEES BEFORE 6PM $8.00

HUGO - REAL D 3D ($3.25 SURCHARGE) [PG]1130 225 525 815

IMMORTALS [R] i1135 210 445 720 955

LIKE CRAZY [PG13]1200 215 435 705 920

JACK AND JILL [PG]

NEW YEAR’S EVE [PG13]

1145 1255 205 315 425 535 645 755 905 1015

1130 1230 130 230 330 430 530 630 730 830 930 1030

MARTHA MARCY MAY MARLENE [R] i1215 245 515 745 1010

COURAGEOUS [PG13]1220 410 710 1005

THE IDES OF MARCH [R] i1205 235 500 725 950

HAPPY FEET TWO [PG]1140 220 450 715 945

THE MUPPETS [PG]1150 110 230 350 510 630 750 910 1030

HUGO [PG]100 400 700 1000

TIMES VALID FOR 12/09/2011 ONLY.

THE WAY [PG13]1210 320 650 935

i ID Required

◆ NO PASSES

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DECEMBER 8, 2011 | CITYLIFE

19


N O W P L AY I N G MY WEEK WITH MARILYN (R, 99 mins) The cam-

era loves Michelle Williams as Marilyn Monroe in nearly every scene here, which details the filming of Laurence Olivier’s The Prince and the Showgirl in 1956, as remembered by youthful third assistant director Colin Clark (Eddie Redmayne). She demonstrates complete immersion in Monroe’s physicality, most effectively when she greets the public and instantly turns on “Marilyn.” Award nominations, coming up. (MK: 11.24.11) Green Valley Ranch PARANORMAL ACTIVITY 3 (R, 84 mins) Two sisters befriend a dark spirit in their home, in the horror franchise’s prequel. Texas Station, Tropicana PUSS IN BOOTS (PG, 90 mins) Before his life with Shrek, the flamboyant Puss (Antonio Banderas)

was framed for a crime by that ne’er-do-well Humpty Dumpty (Zach Galifiankis). REAL STEEL (PG-13 127 mins) Charlie (Hugh Jackman) used to be a boxer, but the new sport of robot fighting has taken him out of the ring. Once his son joins him in an effort to make a true contender, Charlie might just have a spot in the boxing world again. Village Square, Colonnade RISE OF THE PLANET OF THE APES (PG-13, 110 mins) After a scientist Will Rodman (James Franco) fails at curing his father (John Lithgow) of Alzheimer’s disease, he becomes the keeper of a chimp that’s been exposed to experimental drugs and is dangerously intelligent. Surprisingly inspired by 1972’s Conquest of the Planet of the Apes — but don’t expect another sequel. (MK: 08.04.11) Tropicana

THE SKIN I LIVE IN (R, 117 mins) A brilliant creepster of a plastic surgeon (Antonio Banderas) invents indestructible fake skin and tries it out on a tortured hottie (Elena Amaya). The plot points may not be too surprising, but the novelty and sensitivity with which director/writer Pedro Almodovar presents them pull the viewer in like a tractor beam and don’t let go. (MK: 11.10.11) Village Square THE SMURFS (PG, 100 mins) Fleeing from an evil wizard’s clutches, the Smurfs fall out of the magical world and into New York’s Central Park. Tropicana TOWER HEIST (PG-13, 104 mins) After losing everything to billionaire Arthur Shaw’s (Alan Alda) financial scheme, Josh Kovacs (Ben Stiller) and his crew plan revenge. With Eddie Murphy, Casey Affleck and Matthew Broderick. THE TWILIGHT SAGA: BREAKING DAWN — PART 1 (PG-13, 117 mins) Newlyweds Bella and Edward

make a baby, but the troublesome little vamperson threatens Bella’s health and peeves the wolves and the vampire coven before it’s even born. A VERY HAROLD AND KUMAR 3D CHRISTMAS (R, 90 mins) After years of growing apart, stoners Harold (John Cho) and Kumar (Kal Penn) get together for the holidays in New York. Texas Station, Boulder Station THE WAY (NR 115 mins) An American doctor travels to France to recover the remains of his son. He then decides to finish the journey his son started: to The Camino de Santiago, as a way of honoring him. Suncoast

SPECIAL SCREENINGS DEAD RINGERS (R, 116 mins) Identical twins with

THE THING (R) 11:55, 2:20, 4:45, 7:20, 9:50 PARANORMAL ACTIVITY 3 (R) 12:30, 2:40, 4:55, 7:10, 9:20 ABDUCTION (PG-13) 12:00, 2:30, 5:00, 7:30, 10:00 DOLPHIN TALE (PG) 1:00, 3:45, 7:00, 9:35 50/50 (R) 7:40, 10:05 THE HELP (PG-13) 12:20, 6:40 RISE OF THE PLANET OF THE APES (PG-13) 3:30, 9:55 THE SMURFS (PG) 12:10, 2:50, 5:15

personality differences (both played by Jeremy Irons) fight over the same gal. Monday, 8p. The SciFi Center, 900 E. Karen Ave., Suite D-202, 7924335, www.thescificenter.com. Free. DR. WHO NIGHT (NR) Episodes from the BBC television show, chronicling the adventures of the

eccentric time-traveling alien and his friends. Friday, 8p. The Sci-Fi Center, 900 E. Karen Ave., Suite D202, 792-4335, www.thescificenter.com. $5 FILMS THAT FEED (NR) Festival featuring socially and environmentally conscious programming, benefitting Three Square and Toys For Tots. Thursday-Sunday, 7p, Sunday, 4p. Theatre 7, 1406 S. Third St., see www.filmsthatfeed.com for schedule details. Admission: two canned food items or an unwrapped toy. HUMANS VS. ZOMBIES (NR, 105 mins) Viruses. Zombies. Bedlam. What else were you expecting? Saturday, 8p. The Sci-Fi Center, 900 E. Karen Ave., Suite D-202, 792-4335, www.thescificenter.com. $5 THE KEEPER OF THE KEYS (NR) Premiere of inspirational movie featuring cameos of renowned self-help authors. Thursday, 7p. The Plaza Showroom, 1 Main St., www.eventbee.com/v/ thekeeperofthekeys. $75-$200. THE MET: LIVE IN HD: FAUST (NR, 260 mins) It’s Faust and the devil ... in the early 20th century. An opera conducted by Yannick Nézet-Séguin. Saturday, 9:55a. See www.fathomevents.com for ticket and location info. $16-$24. MIRACLE ON 34TH STREET (NR, 94 mins) The fight to prove Kris Kringle’s identity goes to court. Tuesday, 1p. Clark County Library, 1401 E. Flamingo Road, 507-3400. Free. MONDAY MOVIES (NR) Comedy features presented on a big screen. Monday, 9p. Freakin’ Frog, 4700 S. Maryland Parkway. 597-9702. THE NUTCRACKER (NR) The famous holiday-time tale of the toys, as performed by the New York City Ballet. Tuesday, 7:30p. See www.fathomevents.com for ticket and location info. $16-$20. VEGAS FRIGHT NIGHT: THE BEAST OF YUCCA FLATS (NR) A bad movie plus in-house entertain-

ment with the Vamp Girls. Saturday, 11p. The Sci-Fi Center, 900 E. Karen Ave., Suite D-202, 792-4335, www.thescificenter.com. $5

Information for December 9th through December 15th

24-Hour Info: 702-438-3456

Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol opens at 9PM on 12/15 ! Tix On Sale now online & at our Box Office THE TWILIGHT SAGA: BREAKING DAWN PART 1 (PG–13) 11:30 2:05 4:45 7:30 10:15 Join us on Tuesday Dec 13th at 7pm for a special 1 night event of George Balanchine's The Nutcracker Live from New York. Tickets on sale now HAPPY FEET TWO(PG) 11:45 2:05 4:20 6:45 9:15 IMMORTALS 3D (R) DBox Motion Seating 11:30 2:00 online and at our box office. 4:30 7:00 9:30 11:59 THE GREATEST MIRACLE 3D (NR) 11:00 1:00 JACK AND JILL(PG) 12:45 3:00 5:20 7:45 10:00 11:59 1:55 3:00 5:00 7:15 9:30 NEW YEAR'S EVE (PG–13) 11:00 12:00 1:35 2:35 TOWER HEIST (PG–13) 11:30 2:00 4:30 7:00 9:30 4:20 5:20 7:00 8:00 9:35 10:35 11:55 PUSS IN BOOTS (PG) 12:00 THE SITTER (R) 11:45 12:30 2:15 3:00 4:45 5:30 7:15 PUSS IN BOOTS 3D (PG) 2:15 4:30 7:00 9:15 7:45 9:40 10:15 11:59

NYC BALLET PRESENTS GEORGE ARTHUR CHRISTMAS (PG) 12:15 ARTHUR CHRISTMAS 3D(PG) 2:45 5:15 7:30 9:45 BALANCHINE'S THE NUTCRACKER LIVE (NR) THE MUPPETS (PG) 11:35 2:00 4:30 7:00 9:30 11:55 Advance Tickets Available MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE -- GHOST THE TWILIGHT SAGA: BREAKING DAWN PART 1 (PG–13) 11:00 1:35 4:15 7:00 9:30 11:59 PROTOCOL (PG–13) Advance Tickets Available

20 CITYLIFE | DECEMBER 8, 2011

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STAGE

LVLT’s Dead Man’s Cell Phone fails to connect BY DAVID MCKEE

Sorry, wrong number When something is described as “quirky,” run like hell. Sarah Ruhl’s 2006 black comedy Dead Man’s Cell Phone (Las Vegas Little Theatre) is quirkiness squared. Setting: a Manhattan café. Gordon (Geo Nikols), man of mystery, has just kicked the bucket. His mobile phone rings. Jean (Ariana Miner), an annoying ditz,arbitrarily decides to answer it. That random act of nosiness proceeds toenmeshherinGordon’soddballfamily, his furtive philandering and equally clandestine criminal enterprise. (You might say he’s in the import/export industry … if Third World cadavers are your notion of “commodities.”) Jean invents corny deathbed utterances and confides phony “personal” details in a misguided attempt to bring closure — another contemporary obsession — to Gordon’s loved ones.

Ruhl’s play tackles — about as subtly as a Clay Matthews quarterback sack — her fear of cell phones, iPods and pretty much anything on “the Internets.” In a culture where inkand-paper letter-writing is a lost art, in which we can befriend people we’ve never met and never will, and where virtual strangers (pun intended) share intimacies online, Ruhl’s point is welltaken. But her ramshackle whimsy, including an 11th-hour swerve into international intrigue and the afterlife, is too precious to endure. And when romance blossoms amidst stationery samples, Cell Phone devolves into a big-ass Hallmark Moment.

DEAD MAN’S CELL PHONE ThursdaySaturday, 8 p.m., Sunday, 2 p.m., through Dec. 18; Las Vegas Little Theatre, 3920 Schiff Drive, 362-7996, $10-$15.

COURTESY: OSA IMAGES

COURTESY: SUSANNAH SMITHERMAN

Cast members from Dead Man’s Cell Phone

In LVLT’s production, talented people try to wrestle Ruhl’s strained plot conceits and ponderous philosophizing into something resembling life,without avail. TJ Larsen’s set, an artistic collage of abstract forms, is not only versatile, its pastel tones mirror the mezzotint coloration of Ruhl’s writing (muted comedy,mutedcharacterization,muted metaphysics). Strong visual statements are also made by Erin Marie Sullivan’s costuming and by her choreography of the climactic umbrella ballet. The symphonic weave of Thomas Chratska’s intricate and well-chosen soundtrack,andlyrical,quasi-Expressionist illumination by Deven Ceriotti, round out the deluxe production values. But the meticulous framing of Ruth Pe Palileo’s staging is undone by her tortoise-powered direction, filled with arid pauses where laughs go to die. Cell Phone snoozes along, beset by awkward pacing and rampant miscasting. Even the reliable slo-mofight-sequence gag flops. Palileo’s best comedic trope is her handling of Ruhl’s frequent scene changes. Cell Phone probably owed its offBroadway success to Mary-Louise Parker, whose stoner drawl and spacey rhythms seem foreordained for Jean. Poker-faced Miner — who brought almost too much personality to Mrs. Lovett in RagTag’s recent Sweeney Todd — is an enigma. Jean’s surreal journey ultimately seems an odyssey in cluelessness. Nikols’ Gordon, businesslike and sexily menacing, gives Cell Phone a reboot when he returns as a ghost in Act II. Too bad he has no interaction with Marlena Shapiro’s comparably dangerous Other Woman: They’re a match made in Hades. Costumed like a Christmas tree, Sue McNulty (playing Gordon’s mother) orates at the other actors instead of communicating with them. As the gentle love interest, Mick Axelrod’s understatement borders on somnolence. At least he’s not the only element in Dead Man’s Cell Phone to require recharging.

HOW I LEARNED TO STOP WORRYING AND LOVE IMMORTAL

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hil Spector made the song “Be My Baby.” Roman Polanski directed the film Rosemary’s Baby. I enjoyed both those cultural classics recently,and thought nothing of the crimes for which those two men were convicted — just as I put the allegations of child abuse against Michael Jackson aside before I took in Cirque du Soleil’s new production celebrating his artistry,Immortal. Truthfully, I had to put more than that out of my mind before my notebook and I entered the Mandalay Bay Events Center on Dec. 3, the Las Vegas debut of the show, which will tour arenas worldwide before settling into the resort’s smaller showroom in early 2013. There was no way I was going to give it a fair shake, much less enjoy the show, if I brought with me all the issues I have with the so-called King of Pop. I normally believe a critic should take certain biases with him when evaluating a creative work. It is his informed judgments, emotional instincts and time-refined tastes that help earn and develop his pedigree. But every artist whose new work the writer is to grade deserves a clean slate. I’ve adapted this philosophy into my criticism. It’s how I’ve praised artists whose previous work failed to impressed me, and how I’ve delivered negative verdicts against my favorite artists. The jury may never have sent Michael Jackson to jail. But in my courtroom, he’s guilty of many things: a shoddy postThriller creative output that went from Bad to worse; blaming the media for exposing problems of his own making; and gross megalomania that erased damn near all the charm he exhibited as a child performer. (And if I could indict the general population for its overzealous mourning of dead celebrities — especially Jackson — it would be a record-quick deliberation.) And yet, despite hints of all those things surfacing during the 120-minute Immortal, I was able to suspend belief — which is to say, I shelved the realities of Jackson and my feelings toward him, and put myself in a position where I could be sucked into the fantasy of the show, if it could manage that. And it did. Sure, I cringed during certain segments, where the performers couldn’t match the energy of the music, the flow stumbled and the emotional manipulation went over the line. But overall, I found myself getting swept into the spectacle, and I appreciated most of how Cirque and show director/writer Jamie King visually interpreted and arranged Jackson’s music — including some of the material I disliked. I’ll cop to feeling weird about liking Immortal, given my strong feelings against Jackson. But just as I don’t apologize for those opinions, I’m not sorry I enjoyed his Cirque show. MIKE PREVATT READ THE FULL REVIEW of Immortal at www.lasvegascitylife.com. a

DECEMBER 8, 2011 | CITYLIFE

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ART

Shaping water, building trees An exhibit explores the intersection of the organic and the manmade

COURTESY: BOBBIE HEMLOCK

BY JENESSA KENWAY

W

hether extending the thoughts of twigs or capturing the elusive shape of water, artist Mark BaughSasaki’s work fluctuates between natural and industrial. It pulls upon the rhythmical nature elements of Andy Goldsworthy and robust industrialist sculptural influences such as Richard Serra and David Smith to create new, hybridized landscapes. Entering the Pop Up Art House gallery, you areimmediatelystruckbytheinstallationpiece “Oasis,” a “river” composed of chunks of reclaimed asphalt and bits of rusted pipe, which meanders the length of the space. Complete with small foot bridges, the piece resembles an apocalyptic Japanese water garden. (Ironically, the asphalt came from the recent renovation of

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PUAH’s parking lot, transforming industrial detritus into an artistic landscape, correlating perfectly with the concept of the exhibit.) A tented enclosure in the center of the space shelters a video projection of water flowing across a white surface that has been sculpted to conform to the streambed captured in the video. A freeze-frame pause at the end of the loop stills the pleasant gurgling, breaking the illusion, provoking contemplation of the water’s passage in the past tense, enhanced by the sprawl of dry asphalt without. The viewer is left to confront the notion that as much as water sculpts the surface of the natural world, technological interventions by humanity alters the pathways of water, forcing changes within the natural environment and its inhabitants both large and small. The other works in the exhibit continue to explore the intersection between technology and nature. In a piece titled “Strange Attrac-

tion,” rocks of various sizes are suspended within flowing iron rods, seemingly caught in the current of an invisible river or maybe the gravitational pull of atomic elements within a chemical structure. Lining the gallery’s left wall are “Illuminated Landscapes,” a series of large photos. Skipping from stone to stone, the artist painted the gushing water of streams and creeks with the beam of a hand-held max light,for a lengthy 16 minutes of exposure, intent upon “capturing the shape of water.” Gazing at the dark,ethereal waterscapesyoucanalmostseethephantomof the artist darting in and out of the shadows. The adjacent piece, “Hybrid Interactions” swarms with activity, iron rods twisting and winding in and out, curving around the knotted hub of a tree; the work deliberately wavers between parasitic or symbiotic relationship between constructed and natural materials. In “Inhabitant,” Baugh-Sasaki strategically

attaches pointed iron prosthetics to the thin, spindly fingers of a fallen tree limb. The “bionic branch,” separated from its original host, finds a new existence with the aid of technology. The artist couples small tree fragments with iron appendages in several more pieces. This joining is strongly reminiscent of an archeologist finding fossils and attempting to fabricate the missing components to offer a picture of the whole organism. Taken to its conclusion, one might see these works as visions of a distant Blade Runner-like society forced to imagine whole trees from a few fragments. Ultimately, these works dramatically illustrate the link between the industrial and the natural landscape, and the continuously evolving interaction of the two. TRANSFIGURED LANDS Thursday-Saturday, Tuesday-Wednesday, 11 a.m.-2 p.m. and by appointment, through Jan. 14; Pop Up Art House, 730 W. Sunset Road, www.thepopuparthouse.com, free.


DINING

PHOTO: TODD LUSSIER

Chef Chris Herrin of Bread and Butter.

Rising pastry chef Chris Herrin’s Bread & Butter is more than just a bakery — it’s a neighborhood meeting point BY AL MANCINI

Gather around the oven

I

n an age of celebrity chefs, the path to superstar status generally runs through highprofile mega-restaurants. So it’s rare you see a young chef with talent and a serious résumé get off that path to open a small neighborhood restaurant. That’s why I’m so in love with Bread & Butter. Chris Herrin is a rising-star pastry chef. He spent two years at Bellagio’s Le Cirque and Circo and two more at Andre’s before helping open Bouchon in The Venetian. After seven years helming that celebrated bakery, he quit last September, intending to open his own bakery attached to a Metro Pizza outlet. When that building underwent foreclosure, he opened a food truck called Lulu’s On The Move, before locating a space in Henderson to open Bread & Butter.

The restaurant is a converted Big Apple Bagels. (Herrin did all of the renovations himself, along with family and friends.) It has a homey feel, with a handful of tables inside and out, handmade light fixtures and an antique window separating the dining area from a hallway to the restrooms. There’s a bakery section in front that sells a mouth-watering assortment of pastries, bread and bagels from 7 a.m. to 4 p.m. And Herrin and his crew offer a handful of breakfast items, salads and sandwiches from 7 a.m. to 2 p.m. Breakfast options (available all day) include corn flakes with fruit ($4.25), sourdough waffles with fresh jam, syrup and honey butter ($7.50), and an egg pizza with potatoes, peppers, caramelized onions and mozzarella ($8.50). Among the sandwiches you’ll find eggplant grilled cheese made with goat cheese and smoked mozzarella,

asparagustomatosauceandarugulapesto($8.50)anda muffaletta made with ham capicola, salami, mortadella,fourcheeses,giardinieraandolivespread($8.50).For beverage choices, Herrin offers 37 gourmet root beers (if you ask for a pedestrian Barq’s, it’s free!) as well as RC Cola and Mexican Coke (made with cane sugar). Bread & Butter doesn’t offer dinner. But every Wednesday, Ben’s BBQ and Smokehouse sets up its truck in front of the store from 5-8 p.m. and serves customers in the restaurant. It offers a choice of chicken, tri-tip or pork with pretzel bread, mac and cheese and veggies, for $14.95. And Herrin is reaching out to local chefs to use the space during the evening hours for surprise “pop-up” dinners. (So far he’s hosted one, featuring former Sloppi Jo’s Food Truck operator Jolene Mannina and former Estiatorio Milos executive chef Josh Smith.) I first visited Bread & Butter on a weekday afternoon. The place was packed with young mothers whose children were excitedly writing on a chalkboard by the door, local businesspeople on their lunch break and a few seniors stocking up on baked goods. I was there for the pastries. But I decided to have lunch, as well: a pastrami sandwich on a pretzel roll with sautéed cabbage, Swiss and Thousand Island dressing, accompanied by a large salad of fresh mixed greens and tomatoes ($8.50). The excellent sandwich featured some of the best pastrami I’ve ever eaten, provided by Ben’s BBQ. I left with a boxed assortment of pastries ($1-$4). Each and every one of them was amazing! I returned with my wife on a Wednesday night near the end of dinner service. The place was emptying out, with only one couple watching TV in the corner and a child from the nearby karate school enjoying a meal with his father. But Herrin told me they’d served about 50 meals that night. My wife’s pork loin dinner was tender and smoked to perfection. The pretzel bread and the side dishes were also good. But my massive half chicken was incredibly tough, almost to the point of being inedible. That,however,was the only negative thing I encountered over the course of my two visits. Based on my limited sampling, Bread & Butter seems like an above-average sandwich shop. As a bakery, it’s exceptional. But the place really shines as a neighborhood gathering point. The staff seems to know nearly every customer. Regulars are encouraged to leave their coffee mugs in a rack on the wall. If you donate a magazine to the “library,” you get a free cup of coffee.And the artwork in the ladies room was done for free by a customer responding to a comment by Herrin on Facebook. In a very short time, the chef has become an integral part of his community — something much more rare and valuable than celebrity. BREAD & BUTTER 10940 S. Eastern Ave., 675-3300. Read more about the Las Vegas dining scene on Al Mancini’s blog, www.almancini.net. a

WHAT DOESN’T KILL YOU ... Someday, after whatever finally kills me finally kills me, the coroner will drop his bloody gloves into the tray and tell his recording device, “… but he didn’t have much time left, anyway.” He will be talking about this burger. I mean, look at the Mobster Burger’s ingredients: a one-third-pound Angus patty, topped with cheese, pastrami — I put that in italics so you’d know you heard me right — and I’m not sure what else. After the pastrami, I stopped looking. Tomato, maybe? Available at an unassuming joint called Chicago Hot Dogs, it’s less a menu item than a challenge — no, a dare. You don’t know lunch, it says. Maybe you should eat a salad, it says. It’s damn fine, too, though it sounds like it would be a meat clash. Earthy beef vs. streetwise pastrami, chunky vs. grainy. But in fact they complement each other, and too soon it’s gone. Oh: mustard. I remember mustard. Still, the Mobster is clearly a bad idea on a bun, an arterial trainload of life-shortening stuff you don’t need — fat, calories — so I’d advise you to think very carefully before eating one of these large, juicy, freakishly good fellas. SCOTT DICKENSHEETS Chicago Hot Dog 1078 N. Rancho Blvd., 647-3647

DECEMBER 8, 2011 | CITYLIFE

23


CRAWL

ROCKIN’ THE SUBURBS

1crazyhappyhour.com

Gin punch sits barside at RM Seafood.

PHOTO: TODD LUSSIER

Evan and Hal Savar know cheap food and booze is the great unifier. They also know there’s great art being created downtown, and not getting to the hands of collectors who are too wary of First Friday to hit Main Street. “I feel like First Friday is a little overwhelming,” Evan says.“My mom has [high-society art collector] friends, but they live in places like Eagle Heights.” That’s why they’ve come up with One Crazy Happy Hour, a themed, currently weekly, (hopefully) soon-to-be-daily event that showcases downtown musicians and artists in suburban venues. Evan calls this the baby steps to getting suburban collectors familiar with that’s happening in the Arts District before they brave the First Friday waves of stale beer and mobs of teens. The first event already had success: Thanks to local art and music (and $2 well drinks/$20 BBQ for three), 150 people showed up to last week’s kick-off. We’re usually first in line to make fun of our Summerlin neighbors. But we can’t scoff at an Eagle Heights family putting up a Casey Weldon and taking down that oil painting of a horse grazing in a field. MAX PLENKE

Celebrating the end of the Prohibition Era is a classy affair, especially at the re-conceptualized Mob Bar BY LISSA TOWNSEND RODGERS

Remember the Repeal!

D

oes anyone remember Prohibition? No … didn’t think so. It was a dark time in our nation’s history, those unlucky 13 years when it was as though everyone in America was underage. For the 18th Amendment had

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outlawed the production, distribution and sale of “intoxicating liquors.” The “Noble Experiment” was intended to rescue America from drunkeness and vice and instead spawned organized crime, government corruption and, unsurprisingly, even more boozing. Then, on a winter’s day in 1933, Presi-

dent Franklin D. Roosevelt signed the for the soft opening of Mob Bar (201 21st Amendment,neutralizing the 18th N. Third St., 384-2764). I somehow and restoring a citizen’s right to have a doubt the mob really celebrated repeal goddamn beer after a hard day’s work. day that much: Illegal booze was a Soisthetaleofourgreatnationalholmajor revenue-generator for their oriday. What holiday? Why, Repeal Day. ganization. Although by then they had Dec. 5 of every year.And you missed the developed that business into an empire party. Parties. At the Repeal Day happy of drugs, prostitution and loan-sharkhour in RM Seafood (3930 Las Vegas ing. Mob Bar was formerly known as Blvd. South, 632-9300), Sidebar, now with some the staff was tricked out changes to décor and in period attire: Sequins playlist but ace bartender IT WAS A and marcelled hair for the Jerry is, thankfully, still DARK TIME ladies, vests and ties for crafting the cocktails. IN OUR the gentlemen. Patrons in The mod glass bulb fixcostume got discounts on tures have been changed NATION’S the evening’s celebratory out for bejeweled and HISTORY. cocktails, so there were bedazzled chandeliers, some fedoras and fringe the walls and upholstery in the house. Fortunately, redone in deeper tones my less-glamorous and a luminous, largerGrapes of Wrath/They Shoot Horses than-life portrait of Rita Hayworth in Don’t They? look also qualified. all her Gilda glory adorns the room. The gin punch was served from an Almost as lovely was the sound of ice oh-so-apropos vintage silver tureen rattling in a cocktail shaker: I passed up into elegant champagne glasses like the Clara Bow for the house specialty, the ones out of which Jean Harlow used theless-evocativelydubbedRegular.But to drink. A pink-tinted concoction of don’t let the common name deceive: It’s Plymouth gin, it’s sweet but not cloya blend of Woodford Reserve Bourbon, ing, with a faintly illicit kick — perhaps Cherry Heering liqueur and vermouth reminiscent of slipping into the secret that tastes like a red velvet Manhattan. door of a speakeasy, but the color also More flapper-fringed waitresses walked reminded me of a punch made of Koolby bearing plates of mini-meatballs and Aid and a stolen bottle from mom and tiny caprese salads as Billie Holiday dad’s liquor cabinet … and that’s as crooned in the background. Given the close as folks born after the Hoover adholiday, I also sampled the Volstead ministration can get to bootlegging. Act, named for the bit of legislation that The other unique libation was brought Prohibition into being — again, the Bee’s Knees, blending Spicebox belying its moniker. How could anyWhisky and lemon over ice — a Dorothing so rosy and Martini & Rossi and thy Parker/F. Scott Fizgerald-style Dragonfruit in a champagne flute with cocktail, sophisticated and graceful, fresh thyme be named after something with a surprisingly sharp finish. With so …tyrannical? its minimalist industrial chic design, So, Repeal Day. Don’t you like the the RM space isn’t retro, but the layout idea? Think about it: St. Patrick’s Day, and the lighting bring warmth to the New Year’s Eve, Halloween have been room, as does the universally charmco-opted by amateurs on a drunken ing staff. And, of course, there’s the idiot sloshfest. OK, St. Patrick’s Day lovely assortment of bottles behind has always been a drunken idiot sloshthe bar, where chef Rick Moonen’s fest, but the other two … hell, who taste for quality seafood appears in its even wants to go out among that mass echt-top-shelf liquor version. Pappy of salarymen on a bender, elbows at Van Winkle, Johnnie Walker Blue and the bar and puke breath in your face? golds and grandes I didn’t even know Stay in and wait for Repeal Day: a existed: How better to commemorate civilized, adult holiday, where we the nation’s liberation from bathtub drink good liquor, wear fine feathers rotgut and toxic moonshine? and appreciate our pleasures and the Repeal Day also provided an occasion freedom to enjoy them.


MUSIC CALENDAR

[DEC. 8 TO 14] HOUSE OF BLUES

Gary Allan (11p, $44-$64) THE JOINT @ HARD ROCK HOTEL

Peter Murphy, She Wants Revenge, Hussle Club (8p, $35) THE LOUNGE

Cash’d Out (10p, free) MGM GRAND GARDEN ARENA

Andrea Bocelli (8p, $75-$400) MOTOR CITY CAFE

Mister Caine, The Solid Suns (9p, free) OVATION @ GREEN VALLEY RANCH

Otherwise (9:30p, free) THE PEARL

Puscifer, Carina Round (9p, $35-$45) VAMP’D

Las Vegas Kiss (10p, free) YAYO TACO

Parker Roads, Two Point Suspicion (8p, free)

SUNDAY

DEC. 11 HARD ROCK CAFE

X: Dec. 11 at House of Blues Recommended. Send event information to: Mike Prevatt at listings@lvcitylife.com. SUBMISSIONS MUST BE RECEIVED BY 5 P.M. ON THE THURSDAY PRIOR TO PUBLICATION, AND EVENTS MUST BE OPEN TO THE PUBLIC. PLEASE INCLUDE NAME, PHONE NUMBER AND ADDRESS OF THE EVENT. EVENTS ARE SUBJECT TO LAST-MINUTE CHANGES. PLEASE CALL CONTACT NUMBERS TO CONFIRM DETAILS.

THURSDAY

DEC. 8

BEAUTY BAR

THE LOUNGE

Merle Haggard (10p, $55)

NICHOLAS J. HORN THEATRE @ CSN CHEYENNE CAMPUS

THE HILTON

Winter Choral Concert (7:30p, $5-$8)

Project 143: Sandy Hackett, Lisa Dawn Miller, Oliver Miller (7:30p, $20)

VAMP’D

The Dirty Panties, The Quitters, The Tinglerz, others (10p, unwrapped toy)

HOUSE OF BLUES

BOOK & STAGE @ THE COSMOPOLITAN

Underground Rebels (9:30p, free)

FRIDAY

DEC. 9

MOTOR CITY CAFE

Odd Man Out (8p,free) BUNKHOUSE

DVIR, Vile Child, Amarex (10p, $5) CHEYENNE SALOON

Substance, Double Barrel Diplomacy (8p, $10)

HOUSE OF BLUES

CHROME SHOWROOM @ SANTA FE STATION

THE JOINT

Holiday Havoc 2011: Rise Against, A Day to Remember, Middle Class Rut (7p, $95.50-$146)

MGM GRAND GARDEN ARENA

BOOK & STAGE @ THE COSMOPOLITAN

HARD ROCK CAFE

Chris Young (11p, $15)

Cash’d Out (10p, free)

Eve 6 (8p, $25)

BOULDER DAM BREWING CO.

Fashawn, Freddie Gibbs (8p, $22-$25)

THE LOUNGE

Watch the Throne: Jay-Z, Kanye West (7: 30p, $59.50-$250)

DOUBLE DOWN SALOON

Merle Haggard (10p, $55)

Gary Allan (11p, $44-$64)

ACCESS SHOWROOM @ ALIANTE

Krys Wright (10:30p, free)

GOLDEN NUGGET

SATURDAY

Cash’d Out (10p, free)

David Bazan, Rusty Maples (10p, $10$12) Ghost Town Hangmen, Tony T & The Pendletons (10p, free)

GOLDEN NUGGET

Joe Nichols, Greg Bates (7:30p, $29$49) DOUBLE DOWN SALOON

The Fat Dukes of Fuck, The Seriouslys, IDFI, others (10p, free)

Trapkey, Take the Lead, Hyperions Horizon (9p, free) TOMMY ROCKERS

DEC. 10

BEAUTY BAR

Krys Wright (10:30p, free)

BOULDER DAM BREWING CO.

Just Three Guys (8p, free)

Recycled Percussion, Love Vendetta (7p, $15) HOUSE OF BLUES

X, Sean Wheeler & Zander Schloss, Black Tibetans (8p, $25-$28)

TUESDAY

DEC. 13 ARTEMUS W. HAM CONCERT HALL @ UNLV

Hyde Park Middle School Band (6p, free)

YAYO TACO

BUNKHOUSE

Daniel Hart (12a, free)

CHEYENNE SALOON

WEDNESDAY

Whiskey Rebels (10p, cover) Severed Corpse (5p, cover) CHROME SHOWROOM @ SANTA FE STATION

DEC. 14

BOOK & STAGE @ THE COSMOPOLITAN

Terraplane Sun (10p, free)

Passion Nouveau (9:30p, free)

Joe Nichols, Greg Bates (7:30p, $29$49)

CHEYENNE SALOON

VAMP’D

DOUBLE DOWN SALOON

HARD ROCK CAFE

Jack and the B-Fish, Black Beans & Hippie Liver, The Solid Suns (10p, free) VEIL PAVILION @ SILVERTON

Uncle Cracker (9:30p, $25) YAYO TACO

Early Graves (8p, free)

The Love Me Nots, The Fremonts, Bold Rush Burlesque, others (10p, free)

FREAKIN’ FROG

Fallen Stars (8p, free) GOLD MINE TAVERN

HB Surround Sound, Burning Agrestic, Stereo High (8p, free) HARD ROCK CAFE

Vault’d (8p, cover)

Rev Theory, Otherwise (8p, $9.23- $15, or $10 with new unwrapped toy) LVCS

Wayne Static, Systemec & Hard 8 (7:30p, $17-$20) THE ROYAL HOUSE

The Matthew Banks Band, Feel, Tinnitus (10p, free)

David Cook (7p, $25-$40) a

DECEMBER 8, 2011 | CITYLIFE

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LISTINGS Recommended. Send event information to: Mike Prevatt at listings@lvcitylife.com. SUBMISSIONS MUST BE RECEIVED BY 5 P.M. ON THE THURSDAY PRIOR TO PUBLICATION, AND EVENTS MUST BE OPEN TO THE PUBLIC. PLEASE INCLUDE NAME, PHONE NUMBER AND ADDRESS OF THE EVENT. EVENTS ARE SUBJECT TO LAST-MINUTE CHANGES. PLEASE CALL CONTACT NUMBERS TO CONFIRM DETAILS.

LIVE MUSIC 3740 S. Nellis Blvd., 436-7600. Thu: Blues with John Zito Band, 11p, free. Every 3rd Sat: Blues with John Zito Band, 10p. ARTIFICE 1025 S. First St., 489-6339 or www.artificebar.com. Open Thu-Wed, 5p-1a. BAR+BISTRO COURTYARD Arts Factory, 107 E. Charleston Blvd, 202-6060, www.barbistroaf.com. BEAUTY BAR 517 Fremont St., 598-1965, www.thebeautybar.com. Thu-Sat: Local and touring bands, 9p, free unless noted. BIKINI BAR 3355 Spring Mountain Road, 4855401. Tue: Rockin’ Blues and Classic rock with The Blues Storm Nation, 9p, free. BLACK DOOR BAR AND GRILL 4640 Paradise Road, 369-9279. Wed: Live music. BLUE MARTINI Town Square, 6593 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 948-6438, www.bluemartinilounge.com. Thu: Nova jazz, 7p; Mundo Vacio 11p. Fri- Sat: Live music, 8p. Mon: Gibson artist showcase and jam ACES & ALES

night, 8p. Tue: I’m With the Band-Pop Star karaoke with Venus Rising featuring Blue’s Got Talent, 10p. Wed: Ladies Night with special guest, 8p. BOOMERS BAR 3200 Sirius Ave., 368-1863, www.myspace.com/boomerslv. Fri-Sat: Live music, 10p, $5 unless noted. Mon: Open blues jam session with host band Four Until Late, 9p, free. BOOTLEGGER BISTRO 7700 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 736-4939, www.bootleggerlasvegas.com. Live music nightly. Tue-Thu: Gus Mancuso, 6:30p. Second and fourth Wed: Jerry Lopez and friends, 10p. Fri-Sat: Live music, 9:30p. Mon: Open mic with Kelly Clinton, 9p. All shows free. BOULDER DAM BREWING CO. 453 Nevada Highway, Boulder City. 243-2739, www.boulderdambre wing.com. Thu-Sat: Live music. BOULDER STATION 4111 Boulder Highway, 4327777, www.boulderstation.com. Kixx Bar: Thu, Sat: Van De Guzman, 7p. The Railhead: Thu: Swing with Jerry Tiffe, 2p. First and third Thu: Boulder Blues series, 8p, $5. Fri: La Nueva Live Mix, 10p, men $5. Sat: Yellow Brick Road, 10p, free. Sun: Latin night, Noche Nortena featuring El Moreno Carrillo Y Su Banda Tierra Sagrada, 9p, $5 ladies, $10 men. BRASS LOUNGE 425 Fremont St., 382-3531, ww w.hennesseyslasvegas.com. Thu: Cigar social, live R&B with Pitty Pat Guidry Band, 8p, free. Fri: Party Monster, body art, live music and DJ Lady Fingers, 9p, $5. Mon: Acoustic happy hour, 6p. Tue: Local song writers showcase, 8p, free. Wed: Ladies Night Wine Down, live acoustic with Bud Mickel, 8p, free. BUNKHOUSE SALOON 124 S. 11th St., 384-4536. www.bunkhouselv.com. Thu-Sat: Local and tour-

ing bands, 9p, free unless noted. Wed: Wednesday Night Hype hip hop show, 9p. Tue: Blues jam with Lipz and Bunkhouse blues band, 10p. CHEYENNE SALOON 3103 N. Rancho Drive, 6454139. Wed-Sat: Live music, 9p. Sun: Live music, 6p. Cover varies. CHOICES PUB AND SHOWROOM 6720 W. Cheyenne Ave., 547-3747, www.choicespub.com. FriSat: Live music, 9p, free. Tue: The Chicago Blues Busters, 8p, free. Wed: The GP Entertainer Tribute Artists Show, 8p, $5. THE COSMOPOLITAN 3708 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 698-7000. Book and Stage: Touring and local acts, 10p and midnight, free. COUNT’S VAMP’D 6750 W. Sahara Ave., 2208849, www.vampdvegas.com. Thu: Local music, 10p. Fri-Sat: Live music, 10p. Wed: John Zito Band, 9p, free. DOUBLE DOWN SALOON 4640 Paradise Road, 7915775. Tue: Unique Massive, 11:59p. E-STRING BAR AND GRILL 2031 E. Sunset Road, 437-8764, www.estringlive.com. Sat: Real Old School Jazz, 2p, $10. Mon: Jazz, 7:30p, $10. Tue: The Ryan Whyte Maloney Band, 8:30p, $10. Wed: Blues night, 8:30p. FREAKIN’ FROG 4700 Maryland Parkway, 5979702, www.freakinmusic.com. Thu: Singers and songwriters, 9:30p. Sat: Live music, 9:30p. Tue: Freakin’ Jazz Jam, 9:30p. Skip Martin and Niles Rivers hosts JamCast, 10:30p. All shows free. GOLD COAST 4000 W. Flamingo Road, 367-7111, www.goldcoastcasino.com. Lounge: Tue-Thu: Gold

Coast Classics, 2p. Fri: Variety Caval Code, 2p. TueSun: Live music, 7:30p-1:30a. Fri: Live music, 9-2: 30a. Sat: Latin. $10. GOLD MINE TAVERN 23 S. Water St., Henderson, 478-8289, www.thegoldminetavern.com. ThuSat: Live music, 9p, free. GREEN VALLEY RANCH RESORT 2300 Paseo Verde Parkway, 617-7777, www.greenvalleyranchr esort.com. Lobby Bar: Fri: Jeremy Cornwell 8:30p. Sat: Ryan Calhoun, 8:30p. Ovation Lounge: Thu: Rotating acts, 8p, free. Third Thu: The Guilty Pleasures, 8p. Fri: Yellow Brick Road, 10p. 2nd, 4th Fri: Strung Out acoustic sessions, 6p. Sun: Zowie Bowie The Vegas Show, 6p, $10. THE GRIFFIN 511 Fremont St., 382-0577. Wed: Live music, 10p. HOUSE OF BLUES Mandalay Bay 3950 Las Vegas Boulevard South, 632-7600, www.hob.com/ lasvegas. Courtyard: Thu: Acoustic Strip, acoustic showcase hosted by Michael Soli, 8p, free, all ages. Fri-Sat: Live blues, 9p, free. Sat: Azul Latin night, 11p, 21+, free. Sun: Gospel Brunch and music, 10a1p. Adults, $37; kids, $17. Motown, Rhythm and Blues: Ronnie Rose Band, 8p, free, all ages. Mon: Live blues, 8p, free. Tue: Alternative Tuesdays, rotating bands, all ages, 8p, free. Wed: Nothin’ But The Blues, all ages, 8p, free. Crossroads: Thu: Kalleton, music by AJ El Kallejero, 10p, free. Sun: Hana Hou Sundaze, live Island Reggae bands, 10p, $5. ITALIAN AMERICAN SOCIAL CLUB 2333 E. Sahara, 457-3866. Thu: Throwback Thursdays. Swanky Supper Club Experience, 6p, $10. LAS VEGAS ROCK N ROLL CANTINA 3190 W. Saha-

FIELD SALES REP$ Join Us... Join the Excitement!

RAT CORPO S T R O ES ADO R W HIRING: ELDOR N IS O

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Kings, 4p. All shows free. 2411 W. Sahara Ave., 367-2411. Jack’s Irish Pub: Thu: Wild Celts, 7p. Fri: Darby O’Gill and the Little People, 9p. Sat: Finnegan’s Wake with the rock o’ the Irish from 9p. Showroom: Sat: Sante Fe and the Fat City Horns, 12a. Tue: Jerry Tiffe, 2p. PALMS LOUNGE 4321 W. Flamingo Road, 9427777, www.palms.com. Sun: Franky Perez, 10p, free. Mon: Santa Fe and the Fat City Horns, 10:30p, $7. Tue: Frankie Moreno with guests, 10p, $7. RED ROCK CASINO 11011 W. Charleston Blvd., 797-7777, www.redrocklasvegas.com. Onyx Bar: Tue-Thu: Toto Zara, 7p. Fri-Sat: Toto Zara, 9p, free. Rocks Lounge: Thu: Acoustic jam, 8p. Fri: Zowie Bowie, 10p. Sat: Party on the Rocks concert series, 9p, $30. Franky Perez, 10p. Sun: Jazz with The StePALACE STATION

PETER MURPHY: Dec. 10 at The Joint

MUSICVENUES The Aruba 1215 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 383-3100 Beauty Bar 517 Fremont St., 598-1965 Book & Stage The Cosmopolitan, 3708 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 698-7000 Boomers 3200 N. Sirius Ave., 3681863 Boulder Dam Brewing Co. 453 Nevada Hwy, Boulder City, Nev., 979-3976 The Box Office 1129 S. Casino Center Blvd., 388-1515 The Bunkhouse Saloon 124 S. 11th St., 384-4536 Charleston Heights Arts Center 800 S. Brush St., 229-1012

Cheyenne Saloon 3103N.RanchoDrive,6454139 Crown Theater Rio, 3700 W. Flamingo Road, 733-8229 Double Down Saloon 4640 Paradise Road, 791-5775 Freakin’ Frog 4700 Maryland Parkway, 597-9702 Griffin 511 Fremont St., 382-0577 Hard Rock Cafe 3771 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 650-8590 House of Blues Mandalay Bay, 3950 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 6327600 The Joint Hard Rock Hotel, 4455 Paradise Road, 693-5066

ra Ave, 368-3010. Sat: “Alchemy” goth-industrial night with DJ Grenadier, 10p, free. LVCS 425 Fremont St., 382-3531, www.lvsaloon.net. Thu: Local and loud, 10p, free. Fri-Sat: Live music, 10p, free. Sun: The Funtastics: King Vs. Cash, 50s rockabilly band, 9pm, free. Mon: Surf City with The Swank Bastards, 8p, free. Tue: Hip Hop Roots hosted by HighDro and Jay R Beatbox, 10p, free. Wed: Jamboree hosted by The Vagabonds, 8p, free. MANDARIN ORIENTAL Mandarin Bar, 3752 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 590-8888. Thu: Chandler Judkins Quartet, 7p. Fri: The Definitive Trio, 10p. Sat: “Trio Caribe,” 10p. Wed: Brian Czach Jazz Trio, 7p. MCMULLAN’S IRISH PUB 4650 W. Tropicana Ave., 247-7000, www.mcmullansirishpub.com. Fri: Live music, 9p. Sat: John Windsor, 8p. Sun: Irish McSessions, 6:30p. Wed: Darby O’Gill and The Little People, 10p.

Las Vegas Country Saloon 425FremontSt.,382-3531 Las Vegas Hilton 3000 Paradise Road, 7325755 Mandalay Bay Events Center 3950 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 632-7580 MGM Grand Garden Arena 3799 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 891-7777 Orleans Arena 4500 W. Tropicana Ave., 284-7777 The Pearl The Palms, 4321 W. Flamingo Road, 944-3200 Planet Hollywood Theatre for the Performing Arts 3667 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 785-5055

The Railhead Boulder Station, 4111 Boulder Highway, 432-7777 Star of the Desert Arena Primm Valley Resorts, 31900 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 386-7867 Vamp’d 6750 W. Sahara Ave., 2208849 Winchester Cultural Center 3130 S. McLeod Drive, 455-7340 Yayo Taco 4632 S. Maryland Parkway, 262-0201 Zia Record Exchange, East 4225 S. Eastern Ave., 735-4942, all ages Zia Record Exchange, West 4503 W. Sahara Ave., 233-4942, all ages

1121 S. Decatur Blvd., Suite 120, 8704440, www.myspace.com/meatheadsbar. Fri-Sat: Live music 10p. MONEY PLAYS 4755 W. Flamingo Road, 3681828, www.myspace.com/moneyplayslv. Thu: Open mic acoustic jam with Anne Donohue, 9:30p. Sat: Live music, 10p. MOTOR CITY CAFE 4080 Paradise Road, Ste. 8, 307-1731. MURPHY’S LAW TAVERN 1590 E. Flamingo Road, 697-0529, www.murphyslawtavern.com. Fri-Sat: Live music, 7p, free. ORLEANS HOTEL AND CASINO 4500 W. Tropicana Ave., 365-7111. Brendan’s Irish Pub: Wed: Sixties Mania, 8p. Thu: Killian’s Angels, 8p. FriSat: Killian’s Angels, 9p. Bourbon Street Cabaret Lounge: Thu-Fri, Sun: San Fernando Band, 9p. Tue: Crush, 9p. Wed: Sounds of Detroit, with The Nite

ven Lee Group featuring Rocco Barbato, 7p. Mon: Dian Diaz, 8p. RÍ RÁ Mandalay Place 3930 Las Vegas Blvd South, 632-7771, www.rira.com/rira/las_vegas.html. Live music nightly, 8:30p. Fri-Sat: Ri Ra Live, 11:30p. THE RIVIERA 2901 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 7345110, www.rivierahotel.com. Queen Victoria Pub: Sun: Acoustic Open Jam, 8p. Tue: Jamaica Me Crazy with Bonafide, 8p, free for locals. ROCK ‘N ROLL WINE TASTING ROOM & SOUND BAR M Resort 12300 Las Vegas Blvd. South,

99 Convention Center Drive, 5632795. Thu: Speakeasy Nights with Michael Spadoni and live jazz artists, 6:30p. Sun: Sunday Sermon, open mic hosted by Bryan Todd and Ryan Pardey, 9p. Mon: Soundcheck Monday with live bands, 9p.

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DECEMBER 8, 2011 | CITYLIFE

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LIVE MUSIC 1301 W. Sunset Road, 547-7777, www.sunsetstation.com. Club Madrid: 500-seat showroom. Fri: Sin City Sinners, 9p. Sat: Nawgahyde, 9p. Rosalita’s Cantina: Fri-Sat: Shawn Eiferman, acoustic power duo, 6p. TEXAS STATION 2101 Texas Star Lane, 631-1000, www.texasstation.com. A-Bar: Thu: Justin Mather, 5:30p. Fri-Sat: Darrin Michaels, jazz, 7p. Sun: Darrin Michaels, 5:30p. Martini Ranch: Wed: Sideshow 5:30p. Fri: Betsy Holm, 6p. Sat: Kelly Christian, 5: 00p. South Padre Lounge: Thu: La Nueva 103.5 Live Mix with Jesus Chuy Espiricueta, Latin night, 9p, ladies $5 after 11p, men $10. Fri: Latin with Hermanos Padillas, 9p, ladies $5, men $10. Sat: Escencia Colombiana, 10p, $5-$10.

SUNSET STATION

28 CITYLIFE | DECEMBER 8, 2011

4632 S. Maryland Parkway, 262-0201, www.facebook.com/yayo.taco. Live music nightly. Mon: Cumbia and dancing, DJ Que Curado, 5p-11p. Tue: Jazz, 7p. Fri: Music and comedy monthly, 8p. First Sat: Music and poetry. Second Sat: Acoustic in association with Pet Rescue Project, 12p.

YAYO TACO

a

DJS/NIGHTCLUBS 4633 Paradise Road, 7910100, www.piranhavegas.com. Thu-Wed, 10p. Thu: “Steam,” house, dance and hip-hop with DJs Chris Adams and Vago, locals free. Fri: “Frequency,” rotating resident DJs and CoCo Vegas drag show, locals free before 1:30a and $5 after. Sat: “Society,” dance, top 40 with DJs Vago, Mikey Swift and

8 1/2 AND PIRANHA

guests, locals free before 1:30a and $5 after. Sun: “El Deseo,” Latin, top 40, house music with DJs Auner and Vago, $5. Mon: “Mansion,” top 40 and dance with DJs Scott K and Exile, locals free. Tue: “La Noche,” Latin dance music with DJs Vago and Exile, free. Wed: “Mix,” dance, top 40 and hip-hop with DJ Majesty, free. ARTISAN HOTEL 1501 W. Sahara Ave., 214-4000. Thu, Wed: saxophonist Martin Mancuso, 5:30p. Fri: “Shake and Pop” with DJ Mike Attack, Justin Baule and others. Sat: afterhours with residents DJ Mike Attack, Steller and others, spinning electro, house/ progressive, techno, tech, 2a. ARTIFICE 1025 S. First St., 489-6339 or www.artificebar.com. Open Thu-Wed, 5p-1a. Fri: “Free Flow Fridays” with Gables and Doodle, 10p. Sun: “Black and White,” with Doug De Nada and Rex Dart, 9p. Tue: “So You Think You Can DJ?” 10p. THE BANK Bellagio, 3600 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 693-8300. Thu: DJ Eddie McDonald; house, hiphop, soul. Fri-Sat: DJ David Christian; mash-up, house. Sun: “Industry Sundays” with DJ Karma; hip-hop, mash-up, house. 10:30p-4a. THE BEATLES REVOLUTION LOUNGE Mirage, 3400 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 692-8383. www.th ebeatlesrevolutionlounge.com. Thu: “Throwback Thursdays,” with DJ Earwaxxx. Fri: “Chick!,” DJ G Minor. Sat: “Celebrity Saturdays” with DJ Trenz; hip-hop, R&B, top 40. Sun: “Closet Sundays” gayfriendly dance party. Mon: “Le Maison,” Cirque du Soleil cast after-party with DJs Shane Thomas and Sarah Fab, mashups to start, house to close. Wed: “Rocket,” Industry night with DJ Spair. BEAUTY BAR 517 Fremont St., 598-1965, www.thebeautybar.com. DJs nightly; most events 10p. Tue: “Nickel F**king Beer Night,” with DJs Biz: E, MNSTR, DJ Creeps AKA DJ Cristo, 10p, $5. 1st Fridays: “The Get Back” funky soul dance party with DJ John Doe and special guests. 4th Saturdays: “Say What?!” featuring DJs and bands, 10p. BLUE MARTINI Town Square, 6593 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 948-6438. Thu: “Noches Azul Latin Thursdays,” 10p. Fri: “Undisputed Grooves” house/ electronic party with DJ Damien Jay, 11p. Sat: “Ultimate Saturdays,” 11p. Mon: “Manic Mondaze,” 8p12a; “Industry Night,” 12a. Tue: “Top 40 Tuesday,” 9p. Wed: “True Blue Ladies,” 11p. BOND The Cosmopolitan, 3708 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 698-7000. DJs nightly. THE CHANDELIER The Cosmopolitan, 3708 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 698-7000. DJs daily. . CHATEAU Paris, 3655 Las Vegas Blvd. South. 7767770 or www.ChateauNightclubLV.com. Open FriSun, Tue, 10p. Tue: Industry night. $20-$30; local ladies free. CROWN NIGHTCLUB Rio, 3700 W. Flamingo Road, 733-8229. Thu: top 40, hip-hop, dance. $20-$30. Fri: “Ladies Night,” hip-hop, R&B, 10:30p, $20. Sat: “Sinful Saturday,” with DJ Dre Dae, Hip Hop and R&B, 10:30p. $30. Wed: Latin Libido Night, 10: 30p. $15-$20. DOWNTOWN COCKTAIL ROOM 111 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 880-3696, www.downtownlv.net. DJs spin house, lounge, downtempo, house, funk and classics, Thu-Sun, Tue, 10p. Thu: “LoDown Thursdays” with Lenny Alfonzo. Fri: “Friday Night Social” with Carlos Sanchez. Sat: “Saturday Night Vibe” with

Douglas Gibbs. Wed: DJ Rob Alahn. Bill’s Gamblin’ Hall, 3595 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 737-0555, www.drais.net. Thu-Mon. After hours party spot, 1a-dawn. DUE FORNI 3555 Town Center Drive, 586-6500 or www.dueforni.com. Thu: “Music and Wine” with DJ Douglas Gibbs and guest DJs spinning, 9p, free. FREEZONE 610 E. Naples Road, 794-2310, www.freezonelv.com. Thu: “Boyz Night,” 8p. “Naked Frat Party,” 9:30p. Fri: Martini social, 5p-9p. Queens of Las Vegas drag show, 10p. Sat: Queens of Las Vegas drag show, 10p. Tue: “Ladies Night” with wet T-shirt contest, 8p. Wed: “Gone Wild With Talent.” THE GALLERY Planet Hollywood, 3500 South Las Vegas Blvd., 818-3700 and www.gallerylv.com. Wed-Sat, 10p. Cover varies. Wed: “Gallery Wednesdays” industry party; locals free. GHOSTBAR Palms, 4321 W. Flamingo Road, 9389999, www.n9negroup.com. Thu-Wed, 9p. Fri: DJ Tino Sanchez, 9p. DJ Five, 12a. Sat: DJ OB-ONE, 9p. DJ Tino Sanchez, 12a. Sun: “Ghostbar Sundays” house night, 10p. Mon: DJ Ikon, 10p. Tue: DJ OB-ONE, 9p. DJ Five, 12a. Wed: “Snitch Wednesdays” with DJ 88, 10p. DJ Tino Sanchez, 12:30a. GOODTIMES 1775 E. Tropicana Ave., 736-9494. Open daily. Thu: “Sinabar,” hip-hop, dance, pop, 10p. Fri: “Vaquero Fridays,” Latin., 10p. Sat: “Noches Calientes,” Latin, 10p. Sun: “Fuego Latino,” Latin, 10p. THE GRIFFIN 511 Fremont St., 382-0577. Mon-Sat, 5p-4a. Sun, 9p-4a. Fri: DJ Rex Dart, 10p. Sat: DJ Aurajin, 10p. HAZE Aria, 3730 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 6938300. Thu-Sat, 10:30p-4a. HOUSE OF BLUES Mandalay Bay, 632-7600, www.hob.com/lasvegas. HUNTRIDGE TAVERN 1122 E. Charleston Blvd., 384-7377. Sat: DJ Lucky LaRue’s ’50s Rock-NRhythm Revue, 12a. INSERT COINS 512 Fremont St., 477-2525, www.insertcoinslv.com. Thu, Mon-Wed, 4p-4a. Fri, 4p-6a. Sat, 12p-6a. Sun, 12p-4a. Free (except for special events). DJs nightly. Mon: “I Heart Downtown,” electronic music, 10p. KRAVE Planet Hollywood Resort, 3667 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 836-0830, www.kravelasvegas.com. Thu: “TEMPTation THURSTdaze” with DJ Javier Alba, 11p. Fri: “Flesh,” with VJ Alpyne in the main room. “sKizoFrenia” in the lounge with DJ RustRyu and friends. Sat: “Candy Bar” girls’ party in the Lounge. Main room: DJ Morningstar and friends. Sun: SINdaze, 11p. Mon: “Meat Market.” Wed: “WTF? Wednesdays” with DJ Earwaxxx, 11p. LAVO Palazzo, 3325 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 7911818. Open Fri-Wed. Sun: DJ Vice. Tue: DJ Five, industry night. Wed: “Old School Wednesdays” with guests. LAX Luxor, 3900 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 2624LAX. Fri-Sat, Wed. Fri: DJ Hope. Sat: DJ Casanova. Wed: Industry night with DJ Casanova; hip-hop, house. MANDARIN BAR Mandarin Oriental, 3752 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 590-8888. Thu, Sun-Wed, 5p-1a. FriSat, 5p-2a. Thu: Lady dK, 7p. Fri-Sat: DJ DDouble, 10p. MARQUEE NIGHTCLUB AND DAYCLUB The Cosmo-

DRAI’S


Gold” with DJs Tino, Albert Gruve; ‘70s-’90s mash-up. Mon: DJ Whoman. Tue: “Tuesday Night Live”; alternative. Wed: “Soled Out” old-school hip-hop with DJs Big D and Mr. Levon James. XS Encore, 3131 Las Vegas Boulevard. South, 7705350. Fri-Mon, 10p. Fri: DJ Pizzo. Sat, Mon: DJ Create. Sun: “Night Swim” poolside party with DJ Warren Peace.

STAGE

THEATER

800 S. Brush St., 229-6383. Rainbow Compnay Youth Theatre Presents “Oliver!” Dec. 9, 10 at 7p and Dec 11 at 2p, $3-$7. COLLEGE OF SOUTHERN NEVADA 3200 E. Cheyenne Ave., 651-5483. One Christmas Carol Dec. 9-11. Fri-Sat, 7:30p, Sun 2p. $8-$10. INSURGO THEATER The Plaza, 1 Main St., 8835500. Motherfuppets, Fri., 12:30a, $15 LAS VEGAS ACADEMY 315 S. Seventh St., 800585-3737, www.lvacademytheatre.org. Touched. Dec. 8-10, 7p LAS VEGAS LITTLE THEATRE 3920 Schiff Drive, 362-7996, www.lvlt.org. Dead Man’s Cell Phone, Thu-Sat, 8p, Sun, 2p, through Dec. 18, $10-$15. LAS VEGAS SHAKESPEARE COMPANY 4675 W. Flamingo Road, Suite 2, 896-9517, www.lvshakes.com. Shakespeare Workshop. ONYX THEATRE The Rack, 953 E. Sahara Ave., Suite 16, 732-7225, www.onyxtheatre.com. Improv Vegas S.E.T., every Mon., 7:30 p.m., $10. The Santaland Diaries, Thu-Sat, 8p, Sun, 5p, through Dec. 11, $20. Santa Claus vs. The Martians, Fri and Sat, 11:30p, Dec 9 through 23. $10 STARBRIGHT THEATRE 2215 Thomas Ryan Blvd., 240-1301. Home for the Holidays, Dec 9-10, 7p, Dec 11, 2p, $8. UNLV 4505 S. Maryland Parkway, 895-2787, www.pac.unlv.edu. A Christmas Carol, Dec 9-10, 8p, $20-$30 CHARLESTON HEIGHTS ARTS CENTER

$79.50. Thu, Sun-Wed: Exxtreme Comedy Show, Wheels Parise, 9p, $39.50. Comedy in the King’s Room, Thu-Sat, 7:30p, $39.50. HARMON THEATER Planet Hollywood Resort, 3663 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 836-0836, www.harmontheater.com. The Amazing Johnathan, Thu-Sat, Tue-Wed, 9p, $59.95-$69.95. Naughty Boys Hypnosis Show, Fri-Sat, Mon-Wed, 9p, $47.97-$67.97. Singing impressionist Larry G. Jones, Fri-Sat, Mon-Wed, 7p, $45-$69. Hypnosis Unleashed, Fri-Wed, 9p, $45.94. THE IMPROV Harrah’s, 3475 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 369-5223. Mac King Comedy Magic Show, Thu-Sun, Tue-Wed, 1p, 3p, $29.95. Defending the Caveman, daily, 7p, Sun-Mon, 3p, $39.95-$64.95. Improv, Tue-Sun, 8:30p, 10:30p, $29.05-$44.95; Allan Harvey, Ronnie Schell, Chris Mancini, Dec 6-

11. Gary Valentine, Mike Burton, Nick Rutherford, Dec 13-18 LOUIE ANDERSON THEATER Palace Station, 2411 W. Sahara Ave., 495-4248. Louie LOL, Tue-Sat, 8: 30p, $49.95-$99.95. Bonkerz Comedy All Stars, Fri, 8:30p, $34.95. Marty Allen, Dec 10-11, 4p, $49.95-$99.95. MEATHEADS BAR 1121 S. Decatur Blvd., Suite 120, 870-4440. Mange Comedy open mic comedy hosted by Tawdri Hipburn, Tue, 9p-11p. NEON VENUS ART THEATER 1404 Third St., 7872481. Improv Audition Challenge, Sat, 8p, $10. For info, call 625-3456. ONYX THEATRE The Rack, 953 E. Sahara Ave., Suite 16, 732-7225, www.onyxtheatre.com. Mon: S.E.T. Improv, 8p, $10. THE PALMS LOUNGE 4321 W. Flamingo Road, 944-

COMEDY

375 E. Harmon Ave. Just Serendipity Improv, Fridays and Saturdays. 7p, $30 AMERICAN HERITAGE ACADEMY 6126 S. Sandhill Road, 949-5614. Las Vegas Improvisation Players, Fri., Nov. 18, 7 p.m., $10 BIG AL’S COMEDY CLUB Orleans, 4500 W. Tropicana Ave. 365-7075. Thu-Sat, 7:30p, Fri-Sat, 9: 30p. Open mic, Sun, 9p. BRAD GARRETT’S COMEDY CLUB Tropicana, 3801 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 739-2417. Sun-Sat. 8p. Fri. & Sat. 10p. CHOICES PUB 6720 W. Cheyenne Ave., 547-3747. First, Third Fri: The Future Icons of Comedy hosted by Louie Muhammad, 8p, $5. 3rd Thu: The G Spot female comedy show, 8p, $5. COZY’S COMEDY CORNER Buzz BBQ, 9640 W. Tropicana Ave., 489-2800. Fri: 8p, $5. 7121 Craig Road, 294-2899. Sat: 7:30p, $5. CROWN NIGHTCLUB Rio, 3700 W. Flamingo Road, 252-7777. Sat: Crown Comedy Jam, 9p, $39.50ALEXIS PARK

BUSINESS PRESS

LAS VEGAS

politan, 3708 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 333-9000. Nightclub: Thu-Fri, Mon, 10p; Sat, 9:30p. Fri-Sat: house/trance. Mon: industry night, open format. Dayclub: Daily, 10a-6p, opens April 9. MOON/PLAYBOY CLUB Palms, 942-7777. Moon: Thu-Sun, Tue, 11p. 2nd Sat: “Awesome Party” with DJ Clinton Sparks. Tue: “Bang!” and locals-oriented Satellite Bar with DJs. Playboy Club: Thu-Wed, 9p. NORTH FORTY BBQ SALOON & DANCEHALL 5990 Centennial Center Blvd., 309-6015. Open daily. PURE Caesars Palace, 3570 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 212-8806. Open Thu-Sat, Tue, 10p. RA SUSHI BAR Fashion Show Mall, 3200 Las Vegas Blvd. South, Ste. 1132, 696-0008, www.rasushi.com. RAIN Palms, 4321 W. Flamingo Road, 940-RAIN, www.n9negroup.com. Fri-Sat. “Perfecto” trance/ house party with Paul Oakenfold and friends. ROK VEGAS New York-New York, 3790 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 800-689-1797. Thu-Sun, Wed, 10p5a. ROYAL HOUSE 99 Convention Center Drive, 5632795. Fri: Tino’s Masquerade House Party with DJ Bad Beat. Wed: It’s a Woman’s World, with DJ Matt Lindsey. RPM NIGHTCLUB Tropicana, 3801 Las Vegas Blvd. South. Fri-Sat, Wed, 10:30p. Dec. 30: grand opening. Dec. 10: Club Nikki closing party. SAVILLE ROW Luxor, 3900 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 222-1500. Private, public events; open daily. Wed: “The Cut” underground party. SHOTZ 4601 W. Sahara Ave., 221-4266. Fri: DJ Theory spins hip-hop, funk, soul, reggae and house, 11pm. STONEY’S ROCKIN’ COUNTRY 9151 Las Vegas Blvd. South, Ste. 300, 435-2855. Open daily. STUDIO 54 MGM Grand, 3799 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 891-7254, www.studio54lv.com. Thu-Sat, Tue-Wed, 10p. SURRENDER Encore, 3130 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 770-7300 or www.surrendernightclub.com. Open Fri-Sat, Wed, 10:30p. Fri: “Aoki’s House” with Steve Aoki. Wed: “Surrender Your Wednesdays” industry night. Every 4th Wed: Lil Jon. $30-$40. TABÚ MGM Grand, 3799 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 891-7183. Fri-Mon, 10p. TAO Venetian, 3355 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 3888588. Nightclub: Thu-Sat, 10p-5a. Lounge, daily, 5p-close. Thu: “Worship” with DJ Five. Fri: DJ Reach. Sat: DJ Vice. TRYST Wynn, 3131 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 800591-6423. Open Thu-Sun, 10p. Thu-Fri: DJ Big Dee. Sat: DJ Pizzo. VANGUARD LOUNGE 516 Fremont St., 868-7800. Open Thu-Sat, Mon-Wed. Thu: K(Squared), Kid Funk and Kid Conrad, 10p. Every 3rd Thu: “Soulkitchen” house party with Edgar Reyes and guests. Fri: DJ McKenzie, DJ 88, 8p. Sat: DJ Soxxi, 10p. Wed: DJ Pookie, 10p. VANITY Hard Rock Hotel, 4455 Paradise Road, 693-5555. Thu-Sun, 10p. VOODOO LOUNGE Rio, 3700 W. Flamingo Road, 777-6875. Thu: “Voodoo Rising” industry night with DJs Whoman, L1, Michael Toast. Fri: DJs Inferno, L1; hip-hop, house, rock. Sat: “Carnal Carnival” with DJ Jeff G; house, rock, top 40. Sun: “Solid

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C O M E DY 3200. Thu-Fri: Playboy Comedy, Thu, 10p; Fri, 10p; Sat: 8p, 10p. $39.99. Dustin Ybarra, Dec 8-10. ROYAL HOTEL 99 Convention Center Drive, 7844712. Rock ‘n’ Roll Comedy Show, Fri-Sat, 9p, $30.95-$49.13. Comedy Live, with Michael Wheels Parise, Thu, Sun-Wed, 9p, $39. THEATRE7 1406 S. 3rd St., 568-9663 and www.theatre7lv.com. The Will Edwards Show, every 2nd, 4th Wed, 7p, $10.

ART 755 E. Flamingo Road, 794-5151, www.atomictestingmuseum.org. Mon-

ATOMIC TESTING MUSEUM

Sat, 10a-5p; Sun, 12-5p. Building Atomic Vegas, ongoing. $12, $9 seniors 65+, locals and students with ID. BELLAGIO GALLERY OF FINE ART 3600 Las Vegas Blvd. South, 693-7871. A Sense of Place: Landscapes from Monet to Hockney, through January, 2012. Sun-Tue, Thu, 10a-6p. Wed, Fri-Sat, 10a-7p. $15, discounts for NV residents, seniors, students and military, free for children 12 and younger. Every Wednesday is locals night, $8 discount with I.D. BIG SPRINGS GALLERY Springs Preserve, 333 S. Valley View Blvd., 822-7700, www.springspreserve.org. Daily, 10a-6p. Trophy Hunter, sculptures by Bryan Christiansen, through Jan 22. CHARLESTON HEIGHTS ART CENTER 800 S. Brush St., 229-1012. Thu-Fri, Wed, 12:30p-9p, Sat,

Get in, get out, get a great deal.

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FREE WILL ASTROLOGY BY ROB BREZSNY

L E O (JULY 23-AUG. 22)

A R I E S (MARCH 21-APRIL 19)

What’s the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen in your life? To answer that question is your first assignment. It’s OK if you can’t decide between the three or four most beautiful things. What’s important is to keep visions of those amazements dancing in the back of your mind for the next few days. Play with them in your imagination. Feel the feelings they rouse in you as you muse about the delights they have given you. Regard them as beacons that will attract other ravishing marvels into your sphere. Now here’s your second assignment: Be alert for and go hunting for a new “most beautiful thing.”

At Chow.com, food critic L. Nightshade gathered “The 78 Most Annoying Words to Read in a Restaurant Review.” Among the worst offenders: “meltingly tender,” “yummilicious,” “crazy delicious,” “orgasmic,” “I have seen God,” “symphony of flavors” and “party in your mouth.” I understand the reluctance of any serious wordsmith to resort to such predictable language in crafting an appraisal of restaurant fare, but I don’t mind borrowing it to hint at your immediate future. What you experience may be more like a “party in your head” than a “party in your mouth,” and “crazy delicious” may describe events and adventures rather than flavors, per se. But I think you’re in for a yummilicious time.

V I R G O (AUG. 23-SEPT. 22)

“Not to dream boldly may turn out to be irresponsible,” said educator George Leonard. I certainly think that will be true for you in the coming months, Taurus. In my astrological opinion, you have a sacred duty not only to yourself, but also to the people you care about, to use your imagination more aggressively and expressively as you contemplate what might lie ahead for you. You simply cannot afford to remain safely ensconced within your comfort zone, shielded from the big ideas and tempting fantasies that have started calling and calling and calling to you.

In “Nan You’re a Window Shopper,” British recording artist Lily Allen sings, “The bottom feels so much better than the top.” She means it ironically; the person she’s describing in the song is neurotic and insecure. But in using that declaration as a theme for your horoscope this week — the bottom feels so much better than the top — I mean it sincerely. What you have imagined as being high, superior or uppermost may turn out to be mediocre, illusory, or undesirable. Conversely, a state of affairs that you once considered to be low, beneath your notice, or not valuable could become rather interesting. And if you truly open your mind to the possibilities, it may even evolve into something that’s quite useful.

G E M I N I (MAY 21-JUNE 20)

L I B R A (SEPT. 23-OCT. 22)

TA U R U S (APRIL 20-MAY 20)

Researchers at the University of Oregon claim that in certain circumstances, they can make water flow uphill (tinyurl.com/UphillFlow). I’m not qualified to evaluate their evidence, but I do know that in the coming week you will have the power to accomplish the metaphorical equivalent of what they say they did. Don’t squander this magic on trivial matters, please, Gemini. Use it to facilitate a transformation that’s important to your long-term well-being.

C A N C E R (JUNE 21-JULY 22)

“Dear Rob: Is there any way to access your horoscope archives going back to 1943? I’m writing a novel about World War II and need to see your astrological writings from back then. — Creative Cancerian.” Dear Creative: To be honest, I wasn’t writing horoscopes back in 1943, since I wasn’t anywhere near being born yet. On the other hand, I give you permission to make stuff up for your novel and say I wrote it back in 1943. Most of you Cancerians have good imaginations about the past, and you’re currently going through a phase when that talent is amplified. While you’re tinkering with my history, have fun with yours, too. This is an excellent time for members of your tribe to breath new life and fresh spin into a whole slew of your own personal memories.

Emily Rubin invited authors to write about a specific theme for a literary reading she organized in New York last September: stains. “What is your favorite stain?” she asked prospective participants, enticing them to imagine a stain as a good thing, or at least as an interesting twist. Included in her own list were chocolate, candle wax, lipstick, grass, mud, wine and tomato sauce. What are yours, Libra? This would be an excellent time to sing the praises of your best-loved or most provocative blotches, splotches and smirches — and have fun stirring up some new ones.

S C O R P I O (OCT. 23-NOV. 21)

Mickey Mouse is a Scorpio, born November 18, 1928. Bugs Bunny is a Leo, coming into the world on July 27, 1940. In their long and storied careers, these two iconic cartoon heroes have made only one joint appearance. It was in the film Who Framed Roger Rabbit. They got equal billing and spoke the same number of words. I’m predicting that a comparable event will soon take place in your world, Scorpio: a conjunction of two stars, a blend of two strong flavors, or a coming together of iconic elements that have never before mixed. Sounds like you’re in for a splashy time.

S A G I T TA R I U S (NOV. 22-DEC. 21)

Harvey Ball was a commercial artist who dreamed up the iconic image of the smiley face. He whipped it out in 10 minutes one day in 1963. Unfortunately for him, he didn’t trademark or copyright his creation, and as a result made only $45 from it, even as it became an archetypal image used millions of times all over the world. Keep his story in the back of your mind during the coming weeks, Sagittarius. I have a feeling you will be coming up with some innovative moves or original stuff, and I would be sad if you didn’t get proper credit and recognition for your work.

C A P R I C O R N (DEC. 22-JAN. 19)

There are 501 possible solutions to your current dilemma. At least ten of them would bring you a modicum of peace, a bit of relief and a touch of satisfaction. Most of the rest wouldn’t feel fantastic, but would at least allow you to mostly put the angst behind you and move on with your life. But only one of those potential fixes can generate a purgative and purifying success that will extract the greatest possible learning from the situation and give you access to all of the motivational energy it has to offer. Be very choosy.

A Q U A R I U S (JAN. 20-FEB. 18)

The quality of your consciousness is the single most influential thing about you. It’s the source of the primary impact you make on other human beings. It changes every situation you interact with, sometimes subtly and other times dramatically. So here’s my first question: How would you characterize the quality of your consciousness? The answer is complicated, of course. But there must be eight to 10 words that capture the essence of the vibes you beam out wherever you go. Now comes my second question: Are you satisfied with the way you contribute to life on earth with the quality of your consciousness? It’s an excellent time to contemplate these primal matters.

P I S C E S (FEB. 19-MARCH 20)

Some martial artists unleash a sharp percussive shout as they strike a blow or make a dramatic move — a battle cry that helps channel their will into an explosive,concise expression of force.The Japanese term for this is“kiai.” A few women’s tennis players invoke a similar sound as they smack the ball with their racquet.Maria Sharapova holds the record for loudest shriek at 105 decibels.The coming weeks would be an excellent time for you to call on your own version of kiai,Pisces.As you raise your game to the next level,it would make perfect sense for you to get your entire body involved in exerting some powerful,highly-focused master strokes.

Go to RealAstrology.com to check out Rob Brezsny’s EXPANDED WEEKLY AUDIO HOROSCOPES and DAILY TEXT MESSAGE HOROSCOPES. The audio horoscopes are also available by phone at 1-877-873-4888 or 1-900-950-7700.

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1 Drum from India 6 In a bygone time 9 Lithuania, once: abbr. 12 Erotic diarist Nin 13 Camera output, slangily 14 Bridge material 16 Demand that Kissinger squeal like a pig? 18 What things could always be 19 Judged 20 Joint 21 Melville character 23 Learn about all things rosy-colored? 25 Lean and muscular 27 Put in one’s piehole 28 Body part that may be “on the line” 29 Time Warner launch of 1996 30 Gross-looking delicacy 32 Where 16-across, 23-across, 46-across and 55-across all got their work done 38 Finds work for 39 Hill of the Clarence Thomas scandal 41 Cash cow, so to speak 44 Holy folk, for short 45 Shellfish considered an aphrodisiac 46 Do the nasty with Jeter?

50 Flour measurements 51 Rapper’s greeting 52 Japanese historical period that ended in 1868 54 Creed lead singer Scott ___ 55 Ice skating area that’s totally green? 58 Conversational switch 59 Title for a Khan 60 Singer Cruz 61 Noise 62 Printer’s measures 63 “I put a spell ___...”

17 One of many for “Mad Men” 20 Put off 21 Cameraman’s certification, for short 22 Help breaking into a puzzle 24 “Save the ___ ” (breast cancer awareness phrase) 26 Ability to say clever things 30 One’s homies 31 Mimic 33 Show up 34 Put (down) 35 Like duos Dharma & Greg or Mike & Molly 36 In a traditional way 37 Rung 40 “___ Poetica” 41 Deep hole 42 Played the horn 43 “The Karate Kid” guy who catches flies with chopsticks 44 Online call service 45 “All right, I get it already!” 47 “___ intended” 48 Sit on the throne 49 Krabappel and Ferber 53 Kitchen gadget and cookware company 55 Singer Corinne Bailey ___ 56 Mark Tatulli comic strip 57 Former “Survivor” contestant ___-Man Chan

DOWN

1 Concept embodying yin and yang 2 Folk singer DiFranco 3 Biker’s headwear: var. 4 Favor over other options 5 Tennis legend Arthur 6 It may cause snoring 7 Braces (for) 8 Acne-fighting brand 9 Bend down low 10 Novak Djokovic’s country 11 Varnish ingredients 14 Said some bad words 15 Shallot relatives

©2011 Jonesin’ Crosswords (editor@jonesincrosswords.com)

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Kaidoku Each of the 26 letters of the alphabet is represented in this grid by a number between 1 and 26. Using letter frequency, word-pattern recognition, and the numbers as your guides, fill in the grid with well-known English words (HINT: since a Q is always followed by a U, try hunting down the Q first). Only lowercase, unhyphenated words are allowed in kaidoku, so you won’t see anything like STOCKHOLM or LONG-LOST in here (but you might see AFGHAN, since it has an uncapitalized meaning, too). Now stop wasting my precious time and SOLVE!!

5 2 4 8 5 8 9 7 3 1 4 6 8 2 6 8 9 7 1 3 9 6 5 6 4 9 6 3

S TANDARD S UDOKU

To solve the Sudoku, each row, column and 3x3 box must contain each of the numbers 1 to 9 once and only once.

©2011 Psycho Sudoku

Film Solution to last week’s Psycho Sudoku

9 1 3 7 2 4 6 5 8

6 2 4 1 5 8 9 3 7

5 7 8 6 9 3 2 4 1

8 3 6 2 7 5 1 9 4

1 9 5 8 4 6 3 7 2

7 4 2 9 3 1 8 6 5

4 8 9 5 6 2 7 1 3

2 5 7 3 1 9 4 8 6

3 6 1 4 8 7 5 2 9

Solution to last week’s Standard Sudoku

a

DECEMBER 8, 2011 | CITYLIFE

35


CITYLIFE Las Vegas

Here’s How it works: Answer an ad: 1. Note the

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men seekinG Women

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I’M MISSING IN YOUR LIFE SBM, 38, 6’ 1”, 180 lbs, spiritually, mentally and physically attractive, seeks woman, 29-50, who’s financially secure, and one the same wave length to share experiences together. 341298

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NONEST MAN TRU LOVE AWAITS YOU SBF, 43, 5’8”, slim build, light brown eyes, light- WM, 57, honest, seeking an honest, faithful small skinned, short haircut, I work in the medical field, woman, 45-60, for love and a serious relationship. 341291 N/S, seeks an honest single man, 65-80, who apSEEKING VERY TALL WOMAN preciates life and a good woman. Please no drama SWM, 43, 5’5”, very outgoing, caring, N/S, likes or games. 339837 bowling, movies, concerts, seeks tall WF, 28-42, N/S, for friendship first possible LTR. 336090 A WALK ON THE PARK SBF, 36, 5’ 6”, slim build, N/S, professional worker, LOOK NO FURTHER seeks a nice, honest man, 35-50, N/S, for friend- SHM, 45, 5’7’’, medium build, nice looks, cleanship, dating, possible LTR. Please be respectful and shaven, wants to meet a SF, 30-45, who likes movies, fine dining and more. 336322 kind. 341268

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%

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ARE YOU OUT THERE? HOT-LOOKING WOMAN SWF, 21, 5’8”, 195lbs, brown hair, crystal blue eyes, SWM, 47, smoker, no children, looking for an interesting SH/WF, 23-38, for friendship possibly leading smoker, loves partying, going out, gambling, boat- to more. 336533 ing, animals, fishing, seeks a nice guy, to share LOVE IS A GAMBLE freindship, maybe more. 335795 SM, 43, 5’ 7”, shaved head, green eyes, half Mexican, half Italian, N/S, seeks a kind, sweet woman, 18+, N/S, any race, to go out and have fun, companionship, leading to possible LTR. 341104

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men seekinG men LET’S MEET SWM, 52, neat, clean, seeks man, 65-75, for a variety of interests. Please call. 338316

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36 CITYLIFE | DECEMBER 8, 2011

a

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Free Ads: Free ads placed in this section are not guaranteedto run every week. Be sure to renew your ad frequently to keep it fresh. Guidelines: Personals are for adults 18 or over seeking monogamous relationships. To ensure your safety, carefully screen all responses and have first meetings occur in a public place. This publication reserves the right to edit, revise, or reject any advertisement at any time at its sole discretion and assumes no responsibility for the content of or replies to any ad. Not all ads have corresponding voice messages. To review our complete guidelines, call (800) 252-0920 1201

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Women seekinG Women HOLLA BACK! SBF, 20, smoker, seeks bi-woman, 23-40, please be very feminine, no studs, for friendship, companionship and maybe more. Race is not an issue. 341328

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Free Ads: Free ads placed in this section are not guaranteed- to run every week. Be sure to renew your ad frequently to keep it fresh. Guidelines: Personals are for adults 18 or over seeking monogamous relationships. To ensure your safety, carefully screen all responses and have first meetings occur in a public place. This publication reserves the right to edit, revise, or reject any advertisement at any time at its sole discretion and assumes no responsibility for the content of or replies to any ad. Not all ads have corresponding voice messages. To review our complete guidelines, call (800) 252-0920

PRACTICE YOUR KICKS SWM, 32, 6’, 170lbs, seeking cheerleading type girls for ball busting and foot worship. Demanding personality a plus. %7820

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DECEMBER 8, 2011 | CITYLIFE

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B Y D A N S AVA G E

I’M A HAPPILY MARRIED WOMAN. Ihaveagreatsex lifewithmyhusbandofmanyyears.He’shelpedmediscover thingsIdidn’tknowaboutmyselfsexually.Theproblem:Three yearsago,myfirstlovecontactedmeafter23years.Hewas marriedatthetime,althoughhedidn’twanttobe,andtoldme heneverstoppedlovingme.Wehavebeenhavingsexye-chats eversince.Myloving,GGGhusbandsaysIcanhelpmyold flameoutifIwish.Whatwouldyoudointhissituation? Chick With 2 Dicks

members who made me miserable? WhatwouldturnmeonifIcouldgetfreeofthewhole fucked-upsystem?AmIaskingquestionsthatshouldn’tbe asked?ShouldIjustenjoythefactI’mturnedonbyhumiliation andseeksafeandsanesituationstoactoutmyfantasies? Having A Rough Day THERE ARE PEOPLE who do not shareyour craycrayfundy/ biblestudylife experiences, HARD, who are nevertheless turnedon bythe exactsame thingsyou are.Human beings are primates,our culturesandsocieties involve allsorts ofovert and covert power dynamics, and almostall humans wind up eroticizingthose power dynamicstogreater or lesser extents. Someof useroticize them in subtleways(pleasure taken in “servicing”a partner, a desiretobe held down, a mildfootfetish),othersmorebaroquely (elaborateD/s scenarios complete withprops,costumes, and clearly definedroles), but power,as agrossoldmanonceobserved, is the ultimate aphrodisiac. Even if we could determine your kinks were shaped by your upbringing, HARD, the shit that turns you on is still going to turn you on. And if your kinks are a “fuck you” to the preachers, prudes and family members who made you miserable —that’s a “fuck you” they earned. Let them have it. (I mean it: Take pictures. Mail ’em to that preacher.) And remember: There are people out there having vanilla, hetero, missionary intercourse in unhealthy, abusive relationships, HARD. You can explore your sexuality in healthy or unhealthy ways, just like vanilla breeders can explore their sexualities in healthy or unhealthy ways, but you can’t escape who you are and what turns you on. (Here’s some great advice for gay guys just beginning to explore BDSM: tinyurl.com/bensten.)

WHAT WOULD I DO? Besides thank my lucky stars, kiss my loving, GGG husband, and fuck the shit out of the other guy? A few things, CW2D. ThisParticularSomeonesayshe’sstillinlovewithyou, CW2D.That’snice.AreyoustillinlovewithTPS?Ifnot,what happensiffuckingTPSreignitesdormantfeelingsforTPSthat, oh,threeyears(!)oftextingandsextinghaven’t?Evenifyou don’tfeelanymorestronglyforTPSafterfuckinghim,CW2D, whatifTPSdecidesyoureallyaretheone-and-onlyloveofhis lifeandheabsolutely,positivelyhastohaveyoualltohimself? TPSisn’tsomerando,asthekidssay.Youtwoshareahistory,CW2D,andTPScouldpresent—orbecome—athreatto thestabilityofyourhappy,GGGmarriage.Socouldacomplete strangeryoumetonthestreetoronline,ofcourse,buttheemotionalstakesandpotentialforcomplicationsaremuch,much higherwithTPSthantheywouldbewithsomeotherdude. So before you do TPS, CW2D, you need to think brainhard about these issues and discuss them at length with your husband. And if you decide to go ahead with it after hashing this shit out with your husband, CW2D, be clear with TPS about what it is you want. If all you’re interested in is a friendship, some affection and a little non-cyber sex for old time’s sake — if leaving your husband, or being poly, is out of the quesREADING YOUR COLUMN mademeasupporterofthe tion — TPS needs to know that before you “help him out.” LGBTcommunity.Igetyourbackinformalpoliticaldebatesand (A note to everyone already composing angry e-mails drunkenbardiscussions.TheLGBTcommunitydeservesequal about the qualified “go for it” I gave to CW2D: Yes, yes: rights,justlikeanyothergroupofcitizens.Period.However,I Every couple you know who’s ever had a three-way or OK’d mustprotestKateBornstein’scommentsinarecentcolumn. a fling wound up divorced. And that may be true — of the Shesaidsex-positiveheterosexualswhosupporttheLBGTcomcouples whose three-ways and flings you know about. You munity—guyslikemeandFRAUD—arenot“straight”men, know lots of couples who’ve had three-ways and flings who but“queerheterosexual”men. aren’t divorced, but you don’t know you know them. Most Sometimes it’s hard for me to get people who are not gay married couples want to be perceived as monogamous even to support LGBT equality because they’re — especially! — when they’re not. So your afraid someone will call their straightness friends who aren’t divorcing as the result of Dan Savage’s sex-advice column appears in more into question. Don’t make it harder. a disastrous fling, affair, swinging experithan 70 newspapers in ence, three-way, etc., aren’t going to tell you Liberal And Straight the United States, Canada about all the successful flings, affairs, etc., and Europe. Write him at they’ve enjoyed.) BEING A BIG OL’ QUEER myself, LAS, I mail@savagelove.net viewed Kate’s suggestion as a compliment. I AM 22, standing in a bookstore on Castro But your point is well taken, everyone gets Street — this is many years ago, just after I dropped out of to choose his or her own label, and you’re straight in my book. Bible college and hitchhiked to San Francisco — looking at a gay BDSM magazine for the first time in my life, trying to DID YOU MAKE AN “IT GETS BETTER” VIDEO? If you hide my erection, reading a story about a Master who makes identify as LGBT, are 18 years of age or older and made or his naked slave carry to his Master’s friends a six-pack of beer appeared in an “It Gets Better” video, science wants to hear that’s hanging from a rope that’s tied to his nuts. To my horfrom you about experiences. If you have 15–20 minutes to ror, I shoot a load in my pants without touching myself. spare, please take this survey: http://z.umn.edu/itgetsbetter. My problem: A bit older now, I’m still very much that boy in the bookstore. The things that turn me on are what ARE YOU MARRIED? Have you had successful flings, afmy own mind — still brainwashed by Southern Baptists fairs, swinging experiences and three-ways your friends and — deems “bad.” I tell myself it’s OK to embrace my “kinks.” family members will never know about? Send me an e-mail, I tell myself to stop analyzing why I’m turned on by forcedshare your story, and I’ll publish it in an upcoming column. exhibitionistic-sex-slave fantasies and just accept them. The problem is I perceive my fantasies as reactionary: They exist FIND THE SAVAGE LOVECAST by definition in reaction to my upbringing. What is my hard(THE WEEKLY PODCAST) EVERY TUESDAY on but a big “fuck you” to the preachers, prudes and family AT THESTRANGER.COM/SAVAGE.

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ANYTIME APPLIANCE REPAIR We buy/Repair all brands. Dryers, stoves, refrigerators & more! $15 Svc Call. 702-726-1415 APPLIANCES-BUY- SELL-REPAIR Wash/Dry, Stove, Fridge & D.Washer. $25 service call. 742-2531. 2103 N. Decatur Blvd

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RE Announcements & Services RE Loans/Mortgages Age Restricted Housing Condos/Townhomes High Rise-Mid Rise Homes for Sale Up to $100K Homes for Sale $101-$150K Homes for Sale $151-$200K Homes for Sale $201-$300K Homes for Sale $301-$400K Homes for Sale $401-$500K Homes for Sale $501-$1M Mfg/Mobile Homes for Sale Mobile Home Lots Sale/Rent RV Lots Sale/Rent Open Houses Homes Wanted Mfg/Mobile Homes Wanted Out of Town Homes Commercial Property Income Property Industrial Property Investment Property Out of Town Property Ranches & Farms Re Wanted/Exchange Recreational Property TimeShare/Vacation Sales Vacant Land & Lots Warehouse Space Water Rights

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This publication assumes no liability for the results or consequences of any contracts, communications or relations arising from or relating in any way to any advertisement in this publication.

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Why Walk? You can find just the right 2nd car for your family in the Classified pages of this week’s City Life a

DECEMBER 8, 2011 | CITYLIFE

41


ONTHESCENE

Test day BY MIKE PREVATT

42 CITYLIFE | DECEMBER 8, 2011

a

what I’m reading lately — I realize I could not be a more boring test client. I ask her if they’ll be drawing blood for the syphilis test. She looks at me a little funny and says it’s not needed. Anyone else might have been elated. But I’m a little taken aback. In previous years, SNHD and The Center campaigned hard to get gay men to test regularly for all STDs — especially syphilis, which has seen noteworthy outbreaks in Las Vegas (and other major cities) in the past 10 years.I was receiving conflicting messages.“Are you sure?”I ask.“But I’ve had [enter sex act here]! As recently as [enter month here]!” She explains: “If you don’t have symptoms after [samesexact]in[samemonth],youshouldbeintheclear. And frankly, we just can’t afford to keep testing lowrisk clients. But we can do the rapid HIV test.” Twenty minutes later, I get my negative reading and I leave. But now the only health I’m concerned about is that of SNHD’s HIV/STD testing program. Is the recession threatening this vital service for Las Vegans? A few days later, I call SNHD and recount my experience. Was I asking too much to also be tested for other STDs? Is money running out over there? In short, no and no. According to Marlo Tonge, communicable disease supervisor at SNHD’s Office of HIV/ AIDS and STD, it’s not a matter of pushing testing as it is assessing risk. “I think the message is the same,but we’ve individualized it,” she says. “We try to notassumeeveryoneisrisky.” Previously, they favored testing everyone for everything. But while there’s been no official funding reduction yet, it’s expected, and so the previous policy isn’t fiscally responsible anymore.Now,SNHD screens the client to determine their risk factor, just as they did me. “If theyhaverisk,wewanttotestthemandencourage them to do other things,” says Tonge. SNHD views its relationship with The Center as synergistic, and its goals for that relationship has exceeded expectations. Tonge proudly says both SNHD and The Center have reduced the stigma of and the barriers to getting tested. She also sounds pleased when she says 70 people tested on Dec. 1. Hopefully those 69 other people were as pleased with their results as I was mine. And hopefully all of us will remember HIV and AIDS on the other 364 days of the year.

PHOTO: ISTOCKPHOTO.COM / THINKSTOCK

IT’S BUSIER THAN USUAL at The Gay and Lesbian Community Center of Southern Nevada. I’m surprised. Conventional wisdom and statistics remind us the gay community has become dangerously complacent about the HIV virus and the disease it can cause, AIDS. But The Center and its patrons are taking it very seriously. Every seat in the main commons area is taken. Furthermore, manned tables with pamphlets, information, condoms and related paraphernalia surround the visitors. It’s Dec. 1, World AIDS Day. It’s also a Thursday, one of the SHE BREAKS two weekdays the facility offers HIV and STD testing, conUP THE ducted by Southern Nevada Health District workers. Many QUESTIONS members of the gay community (and others) take advantage ABOUT DOING of the service because — unlike the other SNHD ANAL WITH sites that offer testing — there are no fees. It’s also anonymous and quick. A rapid HIV test OTHER ONES screens your blood with a finger stick ABOUT WHAT and 15-20 minutes later, a staff I’M READING member calls your number and you discover your status. LATELY. While the test-takers wait to be called into the testing room or receive their results, The Center’s volunteers field calls (“The wait’s longer than usual. Make sure you’ve got an hour.”), greet newcomers and explain the relevance of the day, either with short speeches or videos played on the TV. You’d expect to feel uncomfortable waiting to get tested for HIV and sexually transmitted diseases along with so many people. But the mood at the Center is lively, buzzing, casual and warm. Even one of the Sin Sity Sisters — those naughty, makeup-caked males in nun drag who (A) preach HIV advocacy and safer sex and (B) enjoy paddling patrons at gay bars — works the room. The discomfort actually starts once your number’s been called and the Health District worker begins interrogating about your personal details and sex life. She asks you about how much you’re getting laid, blow jobs (my words, not hers), butt sex (her words — just kidding!), the frequency with which you use protection and whether you’ve noticed any weird symptoms or sores. Near the end of the interrogation — which she’s nice about, even breaking up the questions about doing anal with other ones about


DECEMBER 8, 2011 | CITYLIFE

43


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Out on a metal limb  

Organic meets artificial in a smart new exhibit. Also in this issue: Stories from the homeless corridor, written by someone who lives there....

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