KiskinisDespina Religious 041511

The following speech was delivered by Despina Kiskinis (’11) at morning assembly on April 15, 2011.

Grad at Grad Reflection – “A Loyola Student is Becoming More Religious” The Profile of the Graduate at Graduation states that, by graduation, a Jesuit high school student “has an understanding of the variety of the world’s religious traditions.” Throughout my education, I have become more understanding of the world’s religious traditions by attending an Episcopal Grammar School and a Catholic High School, while having a Greek Orthodox faith.

Being raised a Greek Orthodox Christian has been one of the most influential elements in the development of my faith life. Through the guidance of my family members and regular Sunday School classes, I was taught from an early age the importance of maintaining a spiritual relationship with God. My great-grandmother was probably the most “holy” person I have encountered, and I always felt her encouragement to remember to let God and faith into my life.

Since I was brought up so strictly in the Greek Orthodox Church, when I decided I would attend St. Hilda’s and St. Hugh’s Episcopal School in the 6th grade, it presented a challenge for not only me but for my family as well. As part of every school day we attended “chapel” which included a hymn, a prayer, and our daily announcements. The idea of the hymn and prayer caused me great anxiety because I felt that if I participated, I would in some way be disloyal to the Greek Orthodox Church. Feeling extremely out of my element, I asked my mom her perspective, and she told me there was absolutely nothing wrong with praying the Lord’s Prayer with my classmates because we believe in the same God. With my mom’s approval I felt the freedom to recognize not only the differences, but also the similarities between my religion and others.

When I came to Loyola, I no longer had chapel every day, but I soon discovered that as a school community we pray together often. Initially, I was again hesitant to participate in prayer and sing along at Mass, yet as I prepare to graduate, some of my fondest memories throughout my time at Loyola include singing and praying with our community during Mass and at retreats.

I have found myself belting out “Come and Follow Me” not only at Mass, but walking through the halls – and even sometimes while walking down the street! Being included in and

participating in Loyola’s Masses has helped me grow and have a greater appreciation for other religions, while remaining faithful to my Church.

As I have developed into the religious being that I am today, I have learned to extend my connection with God further than Church visits on Sundays and holidays or with school. This year, in particular, has been an ever-evolving spiritual journey of which I have enjoyed every moment. The Grad at Grad document states that a Jesuit high school student is “aware and appreciates that human life is fundamentally spiritual.” Because we are constantly changing and growing as individuals, our faith lives are at different places during different times of our lives.

One who attempts to grow in relationship with God may begin to have questions about God and faith, however questioning should not inflict shame upon a developing believer. I have had periods of questioning this year, but even through those times I always believed and recognized that I had my faith.

The Grad at Grad also says: “By graduation the Jesuit High School student understands

that being fully alive and human necessitates an active relationship with God.” I struggle with allowing myself to feel vulnerable in any relationship, and in a relationship with God one cannot help but to feel out of control. Losing my grandfather and grandmother within the last two years weakened, but at the same time strengthened my relationship with God. Unable to confront these great losses in my life, I found myself turning to God more than ever because I felt as though I was engaging in an honest and confidential conversation in which I could freely express myself. Even though my first few conversations after these losses may have been based upon anger, I came to the conclusion that God had truly blessed me, for I had visited both of my grandparents in Greece and spent quality time with them before their passing; therefore I was able to feel as though I had been there for them. I came to this realization through my experiences on the Kairos retreat.

Kairos could not have come at a more complicated time in my life. I was still struggling

to accept the loss of my grandmother, which made me feel insecure and hesitant to share personal aspects of my life with classmates. I went into the retreat convinced that I would get nothing out of it. Although I had completely closed myself off to the possibility of any positive

experiences on the retreat, the spirit of Kairos, working through a few important individuals, encouraged me to express my true feelings with not only others, but more importantly, with God as well. As soon as I allowed myself to be honest with God, a huge weight was lifted off my chest and I looked forward to further developing my new relationship with God. Because I felt more comfortable in one of the most important relationships I have, I was able to form unforgettable connections with my classmates and continue the rest of senior year with a new perspective. Dr. Meade describes the seniors as being “Kairotic” upon our return from the retreat.

With my new “Kairotic” attitude, I also gained a new appreciation for my prayer class.

In prayer class we closely examined our images of God in order to create a deeper

understanding of our personal relationships with God. Through writing our own prayers, I discovered that strength and vulnerability are of the same essence; one needs the strength to be vulnerable. While each of us may have a unique faith life, we are united under one God who loves each of us. At Loyola especially, we communicate with God together through prayer and song to express our joys or sorrows. Our communal prayer helps us to share our faith lives with each other. Although each of us has an individual, personal relationship with God, ultimately our uniqueness unites us rather than divides us. Even though I know that I have not and will not embark on the exact same spiritual journey as others, our common beliefs create a unique understanding among us.

According to the Grad at Grad, by graduation a student in a Jesuit high school has “experienced the presence of God -- finding God in all things -- in private prayer, on a retreat, in liturgical prayer, and in some other moments of grace.” My experiences in developing my faith this year have greatly been characterized by these four qualities. I always keep in mind that one must always have the courage to feel – to feel strong, weak, loving, or compassionate. Through all my experiences, whether negative or positive, I have been learning to find God in all things and I only hope to continue to do so. Thank you.