DiGuidoDani Open to Growth 120210

The following speech was delivered by Daniela DiGuido (’11) at morning assembly on December 2, 2010. A Loyola student is becoming more “Open to Growth.”

As a freshman, I used to wonder if I would ever successfully fulfill all five areas

of the Grad-at-Grad before my years at Loyola came to a close. “Loving” and “Academically Excellent”? Sure, I thought, I was both of those. “Religious” and “Committed to Doing Justice”? I have been attending Catholic school for a large majority of my life, so yes, those were both do-able. “Open to Growth,” however, was the characteristic about which I was least confident, and ironically, the one I was asked to reflect upon today.

Prior to entering Loyola, I would have never considered myself to be open,

especially to change and personal growth. I was a shy, timid girl, for whom “change” meant taking the subway by myself to school. As I understand it now, being Open to Growth means establishing my values, expanding on them through experience, and then venturing into situations that would challenge them; as a freshman, I could not imagine ever being able to do that.

The Grad-at-Grad document notes that a graduate who is Open to Growth is one who “explores career and life-style choices within a framework of faith and values.”

More than any of the other statements, that one truly resonates with me. Through my openness to things I had never experienced before coming to Loyola, I have discovered how I want to live out my future by continuing to be a loving Christian, dedicated to service.

When I was younger, my parents enrolled me in both CCD classes and Catholic school. I became very resistant to Catholicism due the harsh ways it was taught to me.

How could God be this “loving” omnipresence preached about in Mass, when all I knew of Him was my failed quiz on the Beatitudes and the detentions I received for coloring pictures of Mary incorrectly? When I was forced to attend Mass, I recall begging God to

reveal Himself to me so I would be able to believe. God never answered, so I just assumed God either did not care or did not exist.

Ms. Baber once told me how she believes the Holy Spirit has challenged her to continue to grow, and how some of those challenges have made her nervous and uncomfortable; I feel like that is a similar journey to mine at Loyola. I would love to say that I walked through the doors of Loyola as a person open to the new concepts Loyola advocated, but I wasn’t. I was just as resistant as ever, and religion never mattered to me until one Mass at the very beginning of sophomore year. I distinctly remember that the homily was about believing in the teachings of Jesus despite the lack of his physical presence among us. I may have been overanalyzing it, but maybe those words were said then for a reason. Maybe God wanted me to believe.

On our freshman retreat I refused to even mention a word about God, but I was a little more willing to discuss my relationship with Him on Sophomore Retreat. Listening to my classmates’ faith journeys made me believe that I was not the only one who constantly questioned my faith. Slowly but surely through Mass, theology classes, and retreats, I began opening up more towards religion and my opinions of God altered daily.

Through the integration of the Examen, it unfortunately did not take long for me to realize that I was an indifferent Christian. I said my prayers, gave up unimportant things for Lent, and did my daily good deed, but none of it was done with emotion. Surely that was not enough.

With my unending need to gain insight as a Christian, I decided to attend the Ignatian Teach-In last month. Besides learning how my passion for helping others was intertwined with Christianity, I finally discovered my love for Catholicism internally. At Mass, I noticed the vigor and spiritual energy encompassing me, and as I looked around, everyone was smiling and singing, including myself! I contemplated how far I had come, not only in my religious endeavors, but through my openness to Catholicism despite my original disdain for it. I discovered that this was who I truly was, a loving, practicing Catholic, who was one the first people to start clapping and singing along to “We Are One

Body” – and I felt like I really was part of that “One Body.” It is remarkable to realize that in only three years my opinions have changed so drastically thanks to the opportunities Loyola put forth for me.

Prior to coming to Loyola, I had never been fond of community service, either.

Growing up in an affluent suburban neighborhood, neither of my parents saw a dire need for me to come in contact with anyone less fortunate than myself, and I made sure I knew the distinct difference between “us” and “them.” In the beginning of freshman year, I didn’t appreciate service and I wasn’t looking forward to my first Brownbaggers. I quickly rushed to distribute my lunches, and the day seemed like more like a Saturday with my friends than a Saturday doing service. On the next Brownbaggers I attended, however, most of my friends were not present. I was very apprehensive, but stayed focused on the tasks in front of me. I remember telling myself “It will be all over soon.”

That day I met a homeless mother who told me about her sick children, one of whom was my younger sister’s age. She spoke briefly about how difficult it is to obtain food for her children when she had depleted all of her money. Although I was nervous that morning, it was that encounter that that sparked my love for working with the less fortunate. I began to realize that these people were not simply faces on television urging us to donate, but real people, with feelings just like my own. Working with the homeless was something I continued doing regularly after this encounter, and as many of you know, I am now a Brownbaggers Leader and a frequent Camden trip participant, and have been for several years.

This year I decided I no longer wanted to work at a soup kitchen as my service placement, and soon enough, I came upon a SNACK application. Working at SNACK, however, incorporated two things I am not fond of – children and the disabled. Despite the fact that I have grown up with a sister with many social disorders, I have always found it very difficult to personally engage with the Autistic and their behavior often frightened me. My constant frustration with children definitely did not make me the #1 babysitter on the block, either. I, however, decided to conquer my fears and open myself up to a new spectrum of service work.

Only a few weeks into volunteering at SNACK, I was already able to call the center my second home. Despite their differences from me resulting from their disorder, I am able to love the children I work with as my own siblings. As a result, I find that I have grown much closer to my own sibling and now consider her one of my best friends.

Without being given the encouragement to extend my boundaries and the opportunity to do service work, I would have never discovered such a passion and desire in myself for helping others.

If there is one thing that I love about the characteristics of the Grad-at-Grad, it is that all of the qualities are intertwined and overlap. By being Open to Growth, I have also become more Religious, more Committed to Doing Justice, and more Loving as well.

Without being given the opportunities that Loyola offered me, I most definitely would not be the same person I am now. Being “open” in the past does not mean, however, that I am a finished project. “Open to Growth” means continuing to apply a positive outlook, taking responsible risks, and being willing to stretch beyond my comfort zone.

Thankfully enough, “Open to Growth” is no longer that abstract concept that I see in the hallways or hear every year at assembly, but something I now live out in my daily life.

Thank you.