West Country Life
Western Daily Press, Saturday December 14 2013
Real wreaths KEEP TRIMMINGS TRADITIONAL
Bristolâ€™s spectacular Family panto! as Dandini
LIZ ROBERTSON as Fairy Godmother
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Martin Hesp on the greatest in society; while Alice Bell remembers the office party
From city high life to rural Somerset, one woman is making tradition so festive
Clare Green looks at the work of Swindon’s Artsite after their best year yet
Happy to have full winter coats at this time of year – sheep at Crowcombe Gate on the Quantock Hills
We chat to Kate Adie and Tom Parker-Bowles; and farmer Irayne Paikin
Alternative Christmas dinners; Cajun seasoning; delicious duck and festive treats
Ned Halley has the pick of the best wines (red and white) for a festive feast
Add some warming colour to your home this winter. Plus, festive wardrobe ideas
Joan Collins; the Boer War; getting children to read; and Riding for the Disabled
The colourful underwater world of the Maldives; plus, travel news and deals
Steve Mellen takes a break at the stunning Gstaad Palace Hotel, in Switzerland
Sue enjoys a winter wander in Crofton; while Martin heads to East Portlemouth
Alan Down rounds off his gardening column for the year with some gift ideas
An oil painting of W H Smith that sold for £28,000; plus, entire store up for sale
Luke Evans on the Great Train Robbery; plus Jimi Mistry on Coronation Street
TV guide Poem & Puzzles Horoscope Where in the West Cover by Fran Stothard
PICTURE: FRAN STOTHARD
40 54 55 56
Roger Evans Seasons change and the months move on. And someone was saying that a relative had died and how long it had taken to get a slot at the crematorium. Anyway, as we are all down to earth country people we note this passing of time and acknowledge that it will, with the fullness of that time, soon be January and February, and these winter months are indeed harvest time for undertakers, and that the obituary column in the local paper will stretch to three pages on occasion. Not that we treat death irreverently, especially untimely death, but it is nonetheless a fact of life and we, all of us are determined to keep on the right side of the grass for as long as we can. The conversation moves on effortlessly to funerals and we hear the story of a local man who died, who was well over 20 stone. In addition to that there were further complications. It was a long way from the altar to the burial site, at his church, up quite a steep bank. Also the graveyard was known to have a very high water table, and to that end it was decided to line the coffin with lead. It was therefore considered prudent to have six bearers. The two strongest were put at the back, the next two at the front, and the smallest in the middle. As the two at the back are with us in the pub, we are fortunate to get a firsthand account. They reckon the coffin was really heavy, as in, they’d never known a coffin like it, but there was worse to come. As they started up the bank more weight came down to their end but, due to the slope, the coffin came off the shoulders of the two bearers in the middle so that those two bearers were, in fact, carrying nothing at all. They reckon it was a close run thing to actually dropping the coffin, feet were slipping on the grass and it was only the fear of dropping it on those feet that kept them going. This was a good story, glasses were refilled but there is still a funeral story to come. It’s a part of the competitive element to these stories. “There used to be a drunk in our village.” This, in fact, would not narrow the individual down too precisely. There would appear to be four or five in every village. Anyway this particular drunk considered himself to be a farm worker but he couldn’t get any work on a farm because his drinking issues made him unreliable and he’d let people down in the past. The only person in the village who seemed to have any sympathy left was the vicar who would give him odd jobs tidying WCL-E01-S2
the churchyard and digging graves. So it comes to pass (a nice turn of phrase within this context) that there was a big funeral, and at the end of the service, the cortege made its way from the church to the newly dug grave, to find at their arrival that the grave was not only about 3ft deep but our drunk was fast asleep in what hole he had thus far excavated. He didn’t get any work off the vicar after that. We’ve always been very lucky around here with regard to security. Up until ten years ago we didn’t even take keys out of cars at night and we only stopped doing that because I discovered that my insurance company wouldn’t pay out on a stolen car if the keys were in it. All that has changed now and petty theft is widespread. The main item to be stolen is diesel. Diesel disappears from farm tanks, vehicles and tractors on a weekly basis. Sometimes the tractor for example, can be parked miles from anywhere and hidden from view, so you wonder just who is about “spotting” these opportunities. I know a farmer who had had his diesel tank emptied on a regular basis no matter how he tried to secure it. In the end he bought a new tank and hid it away from view in another building. For good measure and as an act of revenge, he filled the original tank with water. Within a week the water had gone so he put some more in. “They” have never been back. A group of us were talking about a van driver for an agricultural supply firm. This driver is just about to retire and we’d all known him for years and we were just saying what a good man he was and what a welcome visitor he was to our various farms. So my mind goes back to when the same man did a year as captain of our fourth team at the rugby club. He turned up nonchalantly at the AGM one year but his nonchalance soon evaporated when he was told he had to do a fourth team report on the previous season. Getting up on his back legs and speaking was definitely not his scene and there was no shortage of people to put pressure on him to do so. Eventually, and reluctantly, he got to his feet and ended up making the most memorable AGM speech any of us can remember. He started off hesitantly, “We lost every game before Christmas.” Pause. “After Christmas things took a turn for the worse.” And that was the end of the speech because the whole room was convulsed with laughter.
SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013 WEST COUNTRY LIFE 1
Martin Hesp When you have free rein to write, things you can’t ignore occur. Which is why I start by mentioning Nelson Mandela. And that’s difficult because who cares what I – a little journalist hardly anyone has ever heard of – think about the passing of the great and influential man? As I write these words I’ve just seen a tweet pop up on my screen from another news organisation that says: “Really fascinating – Somerset’s part in the end of apartheid.” You see what I mean… Somehow the media’s determination to connect its own patch with important events elsewhere comes across as… Well, the word is pathetic. What I can do is to say: I wish we had some politicians who had even a smidgen of Mr Mandela’s drive, passion, honesty, dignity, kindliness, thoughtfulness, intelligence and, above all else, humanity. Instead we have buffoons who liken society to a cornflake packet in which only the bright ones rise to the top. I never write about Boris Johnson normally because I have known his family for 40 years and do not want to harm the relationship I have with one member of the clan who is a dear friend. But in this one instance – in the wake of Mandela’s passing and being forced to compare his life with our own sorry folk of influence – the chasm of difference is almost too much to bear. What young Johnson said about greed being good and the “haves” owning a god-given right to rule supreme over the “have-nots” was the very antithesis of everything Mr Mandela stood for. Indeed, it painted a picture of a kind of apartheid in which one class of citizen has more rights than another. Life is not a cornflake packet – it is a multilayered mass of impossible complexity. In our very British sense, this means that a bright person who has the right set of circumstances to start them off in life has a massive head-start on a bright person born in a slum. Eton, Oxbridge and the Bullingdon Club have nothing whatsoever to do with the shaking of cornflake packets, or fair playing fields, or anything else that could be described – as Mr Johnson and his ilk would love to portray – as nature choosing the strongest and fittest. I have known savvy, intelligent people who have been as well educated as the fossil that sits on my desk as a paperweight. One of these was a forester, another was a lorry driver. Both had more natural understanding, native intelligence, weight of character and charisma than all the cabinet ministers I’ve met and interviewed put together. Had Mr Johnson’s shake of the cornflake packet put them into Eton, Oxbridge and the Bullingdon Club, both could easily have been prime ministers. But that was never going to happen, mainly because both men were simply working too hard at the daily drudge to feed their families. Added to that was another reality that is more difficult to put into words – both came from quiet, working-class, rural families which, typical of their kind, fostered no culture of ambition. They were, wisely some would say, content with their lot in life. They were not inclined to shaft other people in reaching out for more. The idea that some greedy moneygrabbing banker is somehow a better member of society than such people is an insult. I am pretty sure what Nelson Mandela would have thought of young Johnson’s extraordinary outpourings – although he’d prob-
ably have merely patted the bumptious boy on his famously scruffy, but carefully coiffured, blonde mane in the manner of an adoring petowner addressing a randy dog. A few years after Mandela became president I spent a month in South Africa and so witnessed what a society looks like when it’s trying to come to terms with the fact that few people have pocketed almost all a nation’s wealth. It wasn’t a pretty sight. It struck me that the country was broken. Had it not been for the genius and the humanity of Mandela, it is certain South Africa would have fallen to bits. Is it too much to ask our politicians to learn a few basic rudiments from his legacy?
2 WEST COUNTRY LIFE SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013
Alice Bell There’s a problem with a radio station holding a Christmas party. It always means the office DJ will be mortally offended if they aren’t picked to provide the music. Well, that and the fact you will never be more than two pints of lager away from an Alan Partridge impression. This party was held at a very swanky hotel, where just one bottle of sparkling water cost more than most of us are paid in a week. Naturally the girls took full advantage of the swank and circumstance though, using it as an excuse to dress up like they expected the men to lay down a red carpet for them. I made the mistake of wearing a dress of blue velvet. I’ve never been serenaded by the same song so many times in just one evening. Tony
COLUMNISTS ONLINE You can enjoy the best of Alice Bell’s and Martin Hesp’s Saturday essays – and our other writers – on the Western Daily Press website westerndailypress.co.uk/wcl
Bennett has a lot to answer for in my opinion. Meanwhile one of the sales girls wore red shoes but she assured us that despite what people may think, she was still definitely wearing knickers. Actually, she proved this too, with a little help from an unfortunate gust of wind as she climbed into her taxi home. The station bigwigs eventually let their DJ play at the party but God knows why because his taste in music is appalling. I think he must have picked his playlist from Now That’s What I Call An Empty Dance Floor. Music to make your suicidal thoughts a reality. Any more of Lisa Stansfield wailing away and most of us would have been on the phone to the Samaritans. After half an hour of tracks that no one paid the blindest bit of attention to, he was reduced to joking: “I knew I should have set up in the bar!” He then hit upon a Michael Jackson song, which gained such a positive reaction that the next dozen songs were also his, and by the time Don’t Stop ’Til You Get Enough started playing, everyone had disappeared again. It was so bad we were actually relieved when “the boss” interrupted to do his little predinner speech, although that’s apparently always an omen of his after-dinner speech. (Yep, we get two for the price of one.) Dinner itself was interesting, as we were all sandwiched together on such a small table nobody dared reach for a napkin lest they were accused of sexual harassment in the workplace. I’d ordered a ham terrine as a starter, which came with what looked like very thin crispy slices of toast. Every time I tried to cut it up, a bit of bread would shoot off my plate like a missile and generally come to land in somebody’s lap. I wasn’t as messy as the new boy in the office though, who’d had so much to drink he didn’t even make the main meal before he was under the table. Admittedly, when it was time to leave, one of my other colleagues had to guide me outside to a taxi like an escort vehicle that travels alongside abnormal loads on the M4. I was slightly unsteady on my enormous stilettos. And giggling like a hyena on crack, I seem to remember. Honestly, what is it about drunk people and finding traffic cones inexplicably hilarious? When you start mistaking people for llamas you know it’s time to have a little lie down. Drunkenness is not the best survival technique. Hallmark definitely needs to start producing Apology cards for drunken people to send their mates the next day. They could just quote Take That on the inside: “Whatever I said, whatever I did, I didn’t mean it.” Or drunks should come with the warning: “May contain actions that some could find offensive.” Maybe even a Spoiler Alert for those inebriated folk who end up telling their partners about that affair, you know, the one they definitely weren’t going to ever let see the light of day.
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©LW SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013 WEST COUNTRY LIFE 3
People Suzanne Savill
The festive tradition of a wreath takes on a particular poignancy when Georgie Newbery ties the willow creation to one of her barn doors. For if Georgie and her husband had not moved to Common Farm, near Wincanton in Somerset, she would never have begun creating her distinctive traditional willow wreaths and her bouquets made from country garden flowers, grown on their own land. “It was a case of finding a way of paying for the rural dream we were living,” explains Georgie, who cultivates flowers including sweet peas, narcissi, dahlias and tulips on seven acres of land, and has a further two acres of wildflowers such as buttercups, cowslips, and ox-eye daisies. The willow used in the Christmas wreaths was planted in 2004 when Georgie and her husband Fabrizio, an artist and antiques dealer, moved into what was then a run-down farmhouse that had not been lived in for some years. “We planted in an attempt to drain the land, which is boggy clay soil. If we’d known we were going to be flower farmers we probably wouldn’t have bought this place,” declares Georgie. “When we moved here the house was full of damp. For the first six months we just had one tap, and if you wanted a bath you had to boil a kettle three or five times. “We camped out in the summer house, sleeping on blow-up mattresses. Luckily it was a nice summer. We only moved into the house because big hunter spiders started coming into the summer house.” It was quite a contrast to the glamorous urban lifestyle that Georgie had previously enjoyed in her career, which included working in Paris for American Vogue, becoming business manager to the designer John Galliano, writing two novels, and working in television production. She left her city life behind and moved to Somerset from London, after coming to spend a weekend with a friend and meeting Fabrizio, whom she later married. The couple now have a seven-year-old son and a four-year-old daughter. “His name is Italian, but he was living in Somerset was working as an antiques dealer and artist. He still does quite a lot of art and did a big sculpture for the last Chelsea Flower Show,” says Georgie. “We bought this house thinking that it could also be used for a business. We had in mind some kind of smallholding, probably something like fruit and veg. “Then someone sent me a bunch of flowers in the post, and it occurred to me that sending British flowers by post was something that we could do as a business, and we would make more money from a sweet pea than from a lettuce leaf. “We’d already been doing gate sales of flowers for a number of years, selling sweet peas at the garden gate, and we were already doing a lot of gardening and had a wildflower patch. “I cut some bouquets and posted them to
friends to see if they arrived in good condition. They did, and so we decided start growing flowers and making and sending our own bouquets. We’re both quite arty people, and I think it’s important to do something that plays to your strengths.” That was back in 2010. Georgie estimates that nowadays, Common Farm Flowers sends out a couple of thousand bouquets a year, as well as making about a hundred Christmas wreaths, and running workshops on diverse subjects including flower farming, willow wreath making, growing your own wedding bouquet, and using social media for business. “I worked out the other day that we grow about 250 different varieties of flowers throughout the year: 15 different roses; 20 different dahlias, 15 types of sweet pea,” says Georgie. “Sweet peas and dahlias are probably our biggest crops, but we also grow all sorts of others, such as cornflowers, anemones, tulips, and daffodils. “We work extremely hard, but I think also we’ve been lucky in hitting a largely untapped market for British-grown cut flowers.” Georgie points out that around £2.5 billion a year is believed to be spent on buying cut flowers in Britain, but most of that business involves imported flowers and benefits countries like Holland and Venezuela. “I think flower growing in this country was affected by the Second World War, when everyone was encouraged to grow food, and by the cuts of branch railway lines by Dr Beeching, which meant it was no longer easy to take a little tray of spring flowers up to London,” says Georgie. “Also many British growers were caught napping by the Dutch in the 1980s. Now the internet has helped to build a new relationship between British flower growers and their customers. We don’t have to use a wholesaler or shops – we can deal directly with our customers.” In addition to growing flowers and making bouquets and willow wreaths – a recent venture prompted by a willow wreath that Fabrizio made for Georgie as a present – Georgie also spends a considerable amount of time marketing Common Farm Flowers. “Marketing what you are doing is essential. I probably spend 70 per cent of the time marketing and the rest growing flowers,” says Georgie, who has put her writing experience to use in her popular blog and Twitter account, and has also got a book deal to write about common farm flowers. She continues: “I’m under no illusions – when people buy flowers from us they are also buying into Somerset. They love the rural lifestyle. “My market is the commuter sitting for an hour on the number 74 bus to Hanover Square in London. They aren’t reading a book or a newspaper, they’re reading their Facebook or
4 WEST COUNTRY LIFE SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013
From top, Emily Morriss makes a hoop for a Christmas wreath at Common Farm Flowers; dried hydrangeas; flowers fresh from the garden next to the coloured ribbons WCL-E01-S2
Clockwise, from left, colourful willows growing ready for the Christmas wreathes; Georgie Newbery making a wreath; collected flowers; a wreath hanging outside; Emily Morriss at work PICTURES: FRAN STOTHARD WCL-E01-S2
their Twitter feed, and reading about what we are doing transports them away from the city.” As she talks, Georgie is deftly making willow wreaths alongside her assistant Emily Morriss, a trained illustrator who joined Common Farm Flowers about a year ago to do an internship and has been working as a fulltime employee since October as business has become increasingly busy. The wreaths they are making are not like the neatly clipped ones that can be found in many shops, but instead have lengths of willow sticking out, bringing to mind the withies that can be seen around the Somerset Levels jutting from reed beds against the backdrop of a vast sky. Georgie explains: “Somerset is a wild part of the country, and this sort of wreath seems far more appropriate. When we’re running workshops on making them we have about 10 people sitting around the table here trying not to poke each other’s eyes out!” She adds: “After the wreath making and Christmas flowers we have a brief hiatus in January and then it is on to Valentine’s day and Mother’s Day, and we get involved with the Fringe at Chelsea Flower Show. And throughout the year we are always busy doing flowers for weddings.” The way in which Common Farm Flowers has flourished seems all the more impressive when Georgie’s mentions that her floristry skills are self-taught. “A lot of people say ‘I can’t’ when it comes to flower arranging, but the truth is they haven’t tried,” she says. “It didn’t occur to me that floristry would be difficult. Mother worked as a florist at The Dorchester hotel in the 1960s, and my mother and my grandmother, and my great-grandmother, all enjoyed gardening. “I have a theory that it is in the genes, and that it may one day be discovered that there is a gardening gene!”
For further information about Common Farm Flowers, go to www.commonfarmflowers.com
SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013 WEST COUNTRY LIFE 5
People Siobhan Stayt
Kate Adie picking up one of her many honorary degrees - this time from the University of Bristol, pictured here in the Wills building, in July last year
Kate Adie is hoping to educate people about the war experiences of those closer to home. And this is all part of the veteran journalist’s latest book, Fighting on the Home Front: The Legacy of Women in World War One. The book tells the stories of very ordinary women who found themselves at the centre of a new type of war. For the first time, those left behind at home found their lives dramatically altered by events taking place overseas. Adie said it was her experiences as a BBC war correspondent that prompted her to look again at a war which she, like everybody, had grown up hearing about. “I have always thought that if you are reporting on a conflict, wherever it is taking place, then you need to report on every part of it,” she said. “You not only need to look at the frontline and the military aspect of war, but at how all people are affected. “The First World War was the first time that
this happened, where ordinary people in Britain were affected. “All other wars before this were hundreds of miles away, so this was the first time that war actually came into people’s homes.” The book looks at the many different ways the role of women changed during the First World War, their desire to contribute to the war effort and the need for them to fill the jobs left by men who went away to fight. Adie’s research saw her travel all over the country to uncover the human stories behind a topic which is already well-documented. She looked through the archives of local newspapers, visited history centres, and was staggered by the depth of detail about the challenges women were facing in a fast-changing world. And one of the biggest things that struck
8 WEST COUNTRY LIFE SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013
her, and one which she hopes will resonate with readers, is how much life has changed over the past 100 years. She said: “It was a very different world back then, the accepted conventions and attitudes of women in work. “And it was a slow process. At the end of the book I do briefly touch on the fact that it was still a long time after the First World War that things began to really change for women. “For example, it wasn’t until the 1980s that a woman was allowed to drive a train.” Adie said the contrast between the attitudes to women in war in the early 20th century and the fact that she, as a female journalist, had been on the frontline covering conflicts just decades later, had not escaped her. She added: “And it is not just my job, but the everyday jobs that women had not been allowed to do. They weren’t allowed to deliver the post, they weren’t allowed to work in a signal box, it is these jobs that we just take for granted now.” With the upcoming anniversary of the Great War, the timing of Adie’s new book is sure to mean a new group of interested readers are likely to pick it up to find out more about such an iconic chapter in the country’s history. And she said looking back to the past was an important part of understanding the present day, especially when wanting to learn more about conflicts. “It was always hugely important to me as a jour nalist,” she said. “You can’t understand why people are fighting, unless you go back decades and look at what happened back then. “You have to know what’s fuelling them.”
Author profile ■ Adie, who grew up in the North East of England, has many links to the West Country having worked as a reporter for BBC Radio Bristol in the 1970s. The 68-year-old now lives in Dorset. ■ Her career with the BBC began as a station assistant at BBC Radio Durham, then a producer for Radio Bristol ■ She was a reporter for regional TV News in Plymouth and Southampton, and joined the national news team in 1976. Her big break was the London Iranian Embassy siege in 1980 ■ Adie was appointed OBE in 1993 and won the Richard Dimbleby Award from Bafta in 1990 ■ She has honorary degrees from many universities, including the University of Bristol and a honorary MA from the University of Bath
Fighting on the Homefront: The Legacy of Women in World War One by Kate Adie, published by Hodder & Stoughton, RRP £20
People Eva Jones
Tom Parker Bowles talking about chips and kebabs? Surely there’s some mistake? But no. It turns out that while the son of the Duchess of Cornwall is normally a fan of rather posher oysters and game in season, he still has nostalgic memories of the student “grub” of his Oxford University days. “I shared a filthy kitchen with two inches of grime on everything, was hopeless at cooking and a classic student who lived off rubbish,” he says cheerfully as he launches the Sacla Student Cookery School. Sacla, the sauce and Italian ingredients company, has set up a scheme where Italian mothers in university towns across the UK give classes in their own homes, teaching students easy ways to cook nutritiously. “It’s such a great idea as most students haven’t got a clue about cooking and it is certainly something I could have done with back then. “I was lucky I did have a few friends who could cook. I also realised that a bottle of wine and a large bowl of spaghetti bolognese was delicious – and seemed to impress the girls. It got me thinking there might be something in the cooking malarkey.” His instinct proved correct. Tom, 38, has since established a hugely successful career around food and cooking. His fourth book, Let’s Eat: Recipes From My Kitchen Notebook was published last year, he’s currently food editor at Esquire magazine and he regularly appears on TV cookery shows. For three years, until 2010, he also copresented Market Kitchen on the Good Food Channel and this year he was a judge on ITV’s home-cooking show, Food, Glorious Food. “I was fascinated by eating from a very young age,” he says. “My mum’s a good cook but it wasn’t about haute cuisine for her. It was just great, simple food using fresh ingredients, often from our garden, that she knew her children would like. “She didn’t teach me to cook but I watched her a lot. Like most mothers when I asked her how she did something she’d just say ‘I put it in the oven’. So I didn’t get many tips from that.” What he did get, in later adult life, is public attention from his family connection to royalty, although this is something he seems chirpily philosophical about. He refers to his stepfather as “Sir”, but not from deference or formality, but reportedly because it’s a nickname from when he was a child and his mother, then Camilla Parker Bowles, would refer to Prince Charles as “Sir” whenever he was coming to visit. “Of course, I get some attention because of my name and the connection but I don’t find it irksome and certainly would never complain about it. In the lottery of life, I was born lucky and I’ve had it good,” says Tom who grew up in Wiltshire and attended Eton before going to Oxford University. “But I certainly don’t think of myself as a celebrity. The idea of that is absolutely horrible. It means people recognise you where you go and if you do something anti-social like picking your nose or something, everyone knows about it. I’d never go on any of those celebrity style programmes either. That’s not for me,” he says firmly. Back to what clearly is for him; his passion for food. Tom is an advocate of ethically-grown and reared food, and champions local British produce. Prince Charles’ role in spearheading the organic food revolution with his brand, Duchy Organics is well known, but Tom doesn’t believe organic should rule to the exclusion of everything else.
“Organic farming is a sustainable system of farming where there’s humane animal practice and husbandry and a minimum amount of pesticides and fertilisers and it’s great when it’s done well,” he says. “But on the other hand, the idea that anything organic is good and anything non-organic is bad is inherently stupid. You can get wonderful food produced at a farm that just hasn’t got all the certification to say it’s organic. “I’m not a fan of lazy labelling or slavishly following things. I think we should all think about taste and flavour, not the stamp on the package and seek out food which makes the taste buds leap for joy and brings a warm glow to the heart.” Making sure his children, Lola, five, and Freddy, three, experience that pleasure is a priority for him. Tom and his wife, fashion journalist, Sara Buys, live in London and Tom says he does most of the cooking at home. “I truly believe mothers do most of the work bringing up children but my area of specialisation is food. I find cooking hugely relaxing and therapeutic so I take charge of that,” he says. He and his family regularly visit his mother in Gloucestershire (“she’s a fantastic grandmother”) and enjoy her signature dish of roast chicken. “I’m obsessed with getting the kids to cook and being excited about food. We make pizzas together and they choose ingredients for other meals. I’d love cookery in schools to get away from the dull home economics approach and be fun and thrilling instead. “You can’t start early enough with cookery. If you did students would know how to cook when they went to uni.” He recalls how Delia Smith tried to tell people how to do the basics and explained in one of her books how to boil an egg. “It was quite right, but she was vilified as though she’d tried to burn the flag. How crazy – it’s exactly the simple steps people need to know.” That said, his own experience of food has been far from simple. For one of his books, A Year of Eating Dangerously, Tom explored the world tasting a range of exotic dishes featuring ingredients such as dog meat and insects. “I developed a real fondness for bee pupae and grasshoppers and discovered wood lice really aren’t that far removed from prawns,” he says. His build doesn’t reflect what seems to be a ceaseless merry-go-round of eating – he’s also a restaurant critic – but the mention of ‘exercise’, is greeted with an expression most of us might adopt if presented with a plate of wood lice. He says: “I hate exercise with a passion. I’m the opposite of lean and mean. I do walk to work occasionally but really I believe it’s far more vital to eat a balanced diet.” He professes not to be troubled by any regrets, saying: “I’m not particularly introspective. At the end of the day, I think good food is the key to health and happiness. “My other beliefs are staying positive and smiling even through the bad times, and having good manners. “I can’t bear people who are rude to waiters for example, it’s despicable to be offhand and rude to people who can’t fight back.”
The Sacla Student Cookery School has free classes in London and Bristol. Students can apply by visiting www.sacla.co.uk
Foodie and restaurant critic Tom Parker Bowles with his ever-so-well-known mum, the Duchess of Cornwall – a ‘fantastic grandmother’ whose signature dish is roast chicken WCL-E01-S2
SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013 WEST COUNTRY LIFE 9
People Tina Rowe
Irayne Paikin, of Todenham Manor Farm, in Gloucestershire, whose sausages, pork and bacon have won praise from the likes of Raymond Blanc and Marco Pierre White
When Irayne Paikin left London she never expected to become a pig and cattle farmer. And not just any pig and cattle farmer either, but one who’s won rave reviews from top chefs, and just five years after starting Todenham Manor Farm, in Gloucestershire, the comments speak for themselves: “Stunning pork belly” is Raymond Blanc’s verdict, while Marco Pierre White says: “My perfect breakfast sausage”. And the run-up to Christmas is proving a busy time for hotel, restaurant and online sales. “When we moved down neither of us knew anything at all about farming and just felt we would be more than happy spending time walking on and admiring our ‘little bit of England’,” says Irayne. But even a cursory knowledge of her past life makes it clear she’s always been a glutton for hard work, with a passion for food, and a gimlet eye for detail. And along with Todenham Manor House, near Moreton-in-Marsh in the North Cotswolds came a farmhouse and farmland… The city folk found themselves drawn to the down-to-earth world and labour linked to the land. Local farmer Barry had kept sheep on some of the land and Irayne and her husband were happy for that to continue. The friendship grew. Irayne reckons a herd of 20 pedigree South Devon cattle appeared: “out of the blue”, but her husband had something to do with it. She takes full responsibility for the pigs, rare breed Saddlebacks, Gloucester Old Spots and Middle Whites. She explains: “I really wanted sausages
made from our own pork. Sausages have a very bad reputation for being full of the worst kind of meat and filler, and although many are indeed like that I wanted to produce a good, honest and delicious sausage. “I grew up with my mother’s amazing food, and loved making cakes when I was a little girl. My mother’s cooking whetted my interest in good food generally. After school I did a hotel management course, which of course did not teach me about cookery, but I did a short Cordon Bleu course and started a catering business and loved going into businesses and cooking for people. “When we first used to come to Gloucestershire it was for weeks or weekends. A couple we knew said they knew a house for sale, but I remember telling my husband it was a ridiculous idea to think of buying it. That was 16 years ago, but we bought this place eight years ago and couldn’t be happier. I always loved planting seeds in the garden as a child. If you like, the seed of watching things grow was planted then. “When we had our first four pigs they were out in the woods which was wonderful for them. It sounds horrible but I was also wondering how to turn them into sausages. Like a twit I had names for them, and after we had produced the sausages and I had the plate in front of me it took me a good 20 minutes before I could bear to taste them. I’ve never named another pig since.” Before Irayne could produce those sausages she had visited the local abattoir, to under-
10 WEST COUNTRY LIFE SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013
PICTURE: MICHAEL SMITH
stand the cycle that the animals would go through. And the ‘Todenham team’ played a crucial role. She and Barry’s wife, Margaret, formulated the sausage recipe, researching casings to make sure they used a kind which is tender and does not force the sausage to shrink in cooking. “I started looking at all sorts of recipes. My husband would come home and find me reading something from the 18th century. We were researching whether to use rusk or breadcrumbs, and we were finding the freshest spices and grinding them ourselves, and still do. I can state what individual spices they contain because I know exactly what has gone into them. Some people simply say ‘spices’. We have rusk and we have to have a little preservative.” Now they produce six or seven sausage flavours, including garam masala and coriander. Margaret soon left her job at a local nursery to be part of the operation full-time. Meanwhile, Irayne continued to hanker after the opportunity to use the beef from that pedigree herd.
Irayne Paikin’s farm also boasts a pedigree beef herd
“The problem was finding where on earth you butcher a 400-kilo beast. Then as luck would have it I found that being married to a structural engineer was a wonderful thing indeed – ‘the husband’ built me a butchery!” Jim the butcher came on board and Irayne started approaching local hotels and restaurants with their products. “We now supply many of them with our meat as well as selling direct to the public,” she says. “We decided to have a small stand at Moreton Show and the manager of the local Budgens came and talked to us and we now supply three Budgens stores. We have a really good relationship with them, it’s lovely when a store supports local food. People have become much more conscious of what they are buying in recent years.” Todenham beef is hung for a minimum of 28 days or as requested, allowing the full flavour to develop. Selling online is an important part of the business, and here again Irayne’s research on the health, ethical and aesthetic aspects of packaging is impressive. The paper she uses comes from managed forests. This year Jim has hand-crafted Christmas Boxes which include traditional pork sausages, home-cured bacon, a gammon joint and a choice of either a topside, rib, sirloin or fillet joint of beef – enough meat for breakfast, lunch and dinner this Christmas. When it comes to animal management Irayne says the philosophy is simple: “Our animals are reared as naturally as possible. Their health and wellbeing is of utmost importance. They eat the best, most nutritious feed we can provide. In the summer months the cattle spend their time outdoors, rotating between the lush fields. In winter they are housed in large airy barns eating silage and cereal grown on the farm. “The pigs live outdoors all year round but in an environment that allows them to root and forage. They are rotated between our many pig pens which allows the ground to rest. They have an excellent balanced and managed diet, and to ensure that our beef is the best it possibly can be, none of the cattle will be sent to the abattoir unless in prime condition and properly finished.” The expertise has been hard-won, and while you can take the girl out of the city, you can’t take the city out of the girl completely. “I still love Selfridges” she says. “I can do Wellies, and the West End.”
SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013 WEST COUNTRY LIFE 11
Picture essay Clare Green
It’s been five years since Swindon artists worked on a remarkable idea. The town’s central Post Office had long since closed and the building faced either more years of being left empty in the economic collapse of 2008, or converted into offices or flats. Instead, Swindon council chiefs offered it to the artists with a deal – if they could renovate it themselves, they could have it as a gallery and studio space. They found it six inches deep in rainwater, gaping holes in the walls, with blocked drains and mould growing up the walls. The 11 artists took up the challenge and threw themselves in to the renovation work. Now, five years on, and Artsite, the co-operative charity they founded to work together, has just celebrated its most successful year yet. When the Oxfam shop across the road became available, they took on that too, and now the whole project is growing way beyond that first damp old post office building. As well as the original project – named “The Post Modern” after its previous incarnation, which houses ten studios and an art gallery, another five studios and a community “window” showcase their work to the world. And the artists themselves are ambassadors of their craft, providing education, encouragement, support and resources to anyone in the town who wants to get into art. The town might have an unfair reputation throughout the country as a cultural vacuum, but it has always been a hotbed of art – from the days of art classes and societies run as part of the social clubs of the old GWR rail works in Victorian times, to the vast public art murals that adorned the ends of terraces in the postwar era.
Next photo essay: Dunster by Candlelight
6 WEST COUNTRY LIFE SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013
minutes to know Robbie Williams A member of Take That and one of Britain’s biggest-selling solo artists, Robbie Williams released his tenth album Swings Both Ways last month, which went straight to the top of the chart. Have you been enjoying yourself lately? I’ve been having some of the best weeks ever. Unbelievable. The sales are just blowing my mind, I can’t believe how this new album has caught people’s attention.
This is the follow-up to Swing When You’re Winning, in 2001, your biggestselling album. Why didn’t you just do another swing record straight after that? I’d get bored. I wasn’t tempted at the time. I don’t think I’ve ever done too many things in a row that are similar.I came back with Reality Killed The Video Star with Trevor Horn,
The sales are going through the roof. How much does that still mean? More than anything, and more than ever. The first time it all took off, there was an intense spotlight which made enjoyment difficult. The thing that I was doing for my living caused all sorts of mad stuff to happen, so I was a bit ungrateful and took it for granted. Now, my life is a lot different. There’s space for me in the world to do whatever I want to, whenever I want to, and I don’t get any grief. Now I’m at a point in my life when I’m very grateful, so it’s really great to have a No 1. Really great.
You do sound very happy these days ... My life is very different, there’s the wife, the baby and it turns out everything I was running away from has turned me into a man. Who knew? Stuff ’s really good, and I can’t believe I’m getting into my 25th year in the business, and I’m still a bit of a force. It’ll be a good Christmas at our house this year.
This album is also a landmark – the 1,00th No 1 album in the UK. Is it significant? It’s a nice bit of synchronicity, and nice that it hasn’t gone unnoticed, but I don’t know what it means, really.
Frank Sinatra’s Songs for Swinging Lovers was the first No 1 in 1956, so it shows the enduring appeal of swing music at least?
Yes. These days, with people taking their clothes off and doing drugs and being cynical in whatever way possible to get attention – and good luck to them, I think there is a market for middle-of-the-road entertainment. It harks back to a simpler time.
Gary’s album was out the week after yours. Do you feel in competition? I’ve always said I want to sell a million-andone records, and I want Gaz to sell a million. I am in competition with everybody, absolutely everybody. When we’re together, we’re best of mates, he’s wishing me the best for this record, I’m wishing him the best for his, and what’s good for us all individually is good for us as Take That. Gaz is a very good friend of mine, and I want him to knock it out of the park when his album comes out, but a few yards shorter than I knock it out of the park. It’s honest. I love him to bits, but I want to sell more.
Is credibility overrated? It is. Credibility doesn’t pay the bills. WCL-E01-S2
SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013 WEST COUNTRY LIFE 7
Food Chris Rundle
When it comes to food you may not think we have a lot to thank the Americans for. They’ve sent us back the hamburger and the frankfurter. These were originally exported from Hamburg and Frankfurt with the waves of Germans who emigrated to the New World. They have got us into the fast food habit. Not a lot to be grateful for, really. But they have also provided us with Cajun seasoning, that deliciously pungent assortment of herbs and spices which first made its appearance here about 30 years ago. Originally designed to enhance the flavours of pretty flavourless American meat, there’s no doubt it can add a new dimension to foods. Cajun seasoning is great with burgers and in savoury pastry, even better when rubbed into meat before barbecuing. Supermarkets sell tiny jars at the usual rip-off herb and spice prices so it’s worth going online for better deals. Or look in a delicatessen for Old Bay seasoning, probably one of the best you can get. Some more ideas this week for party food with the Cajun chicken baps top of the list. These are a real treat if you like your food highly-seasoned without being eye-wateringly hot. The baps are not hard to make as long as you observe the measurements rigorously – and, yes, that does mean weighing out the water. But you’ll be able to serve them to your guests fresh from the oven, and what better treat could there be. Go on – spoil them. It is Christmas, after all.
Cajun cheese straws Ingredients 100g each plain flour and butter, 75g good, strong cheddar, 50g fresh Parmesan, tablespoon semolina, sea salt, heaped tablespoon Cajun seasoning, beaten egg. Method Coarsely grate the cheddar and finely grate the Parmesan. Place the cheddar, half the Parmesan, the flour, butter, seasoning and a pinch of salt in a food processor and whizz together until the mix gathers into a ball. Wrap in cling film and refrigerate for two hours. On a lightly-floured surface roll out to a quarter-inch thickness and cut into strips. Transfer to a baking sheet, brush with beaten egg and dust with the remainder of the Parmesan and the semolina, mixed together, and bake at 190C gas mark 5 for 10-12 minutes or until lightly browned.
Baby potatoes with herbed cream chesse Ingredients. Kilo of baby new potatoes, 175g cream cheese, one garlic clove, tablespoon herbes de Provence whizzed to dust in a spice or coffee grinder, pinch of salt, 10 grindings black pepper, 50g butter. Method Wash and dry the potatoes. Set a roasting pan over a medium flame and melt the butter. Add the potatoes and toss in the butter for a few minutes until lightly browned. Transfer to an oven preheated to 190C gas mark 5 for 20 minutes or until just tender. Place the cheese in a bowl and add the powdered herbs, the garlic passed through a crusher, the salt and the pepper and mix well with a fork. When the potatoes are done allow to cool slightly, make a cut across the top of each one and squeeze gently to open up, insert a teaspoon of the cheese mix into each one and return to the oven for two minutes before serving, warm or cold.
Cajun chicken baps
Ingredients for 12 For the baps: 250g each strong white bread flour and plain white four; one 7g sachet dried yeast; 25g butter; heaped teaspoon salt; 325g hand-hot water. For the filling: four chicken breasts; shredded lettuce; finely sliced shallots; mayonnaise; pickled jalapenos; Cajun seasoning; two limes
Ingredients for 12 Twelve slices white bread, 350g chestnut mushrooms, 50g butter, two tablespoons finely-chopped shallot, tablespoon fresh chopped thyme, one garlic clove, crushed and finely-chopped, generous splash of Madeira, one carton full-fat crème fraiche, sea salt, freshlyground black pepper, two tablespoons fresh grated Parmesan, olive oil. You also need a 12compartment Yorkshire pudding tin.
Method For the baps, place the flours in a deep bowl, mix in the yeast and the salt and rub in the butter. Add the precisely-weighed water, gather together with a scraper, tip on to a lightly-floured surface and start to knead, pulling the dough together and then stretching and turning it over on itself. The dough will be extremely sticky at first but do not add any extra flour. Eventually the dough will form a ball which will be easy to knead. Knead for about five to six minutes then flour well, place in a bowl, cover with a cloth and leave in a warm place such as an airing cupboard for two hours. Tip on to a floured surface and divide into 12 and shape each piece into a fourinch circle. Cover and leave for another hour. After 45 minutes set the oven to 210C gas mark 7 and place an upturned baking sheet on the middle shelf. When ready to cook dust your thumb with flour and firmly make an indentation in the top of each bap, which will stop them rising. Carefully slide the baps, cooking
six at a time, on to the baking sheet and bake for 14 minutes. Place on a wire rack to cool. For the filling, place the chicken breasts in the freezer for an hour, which makes them easier to slice. With the sharpest knife you have got cut each breast horizontally into three or four slices. Place on a board and dust generously with the Cajun seasoning on both sides. Transfer to a foil-lined grill pan and grill for four minutes each side. To assemble the baps, cut almost all the way through the middle, spread good-quality mayonnaise on both sides, add a layer of chopped lettuce and a few pieces of shallot, top with the chicken slices, squeeze lime juice over, add two or three slices of jalapeno and serve immediately.
Cajun seasoning can lift many foods such as chicken, savoury pastry, mushrooms and potatoes, says Chris Rundle
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Clean and finely chop the mushrooms. Melt the butter in a pan and sweat the shallot and garlic with the thyme for three to four minutes. Add the chopped mushrooms, stir to coat, then cook briskly for a minute or two. Add the Madeira and allow to bubble off then away from the heat stir in the crème fraiche. Set over a low heat and cook for a couple of minutes to allow the mixture to thicken slightly. Using a four-inch cutter cut circles from the slices of bread, roll out slightly, and brush with olive oil on each side. Press down well into the tin compartments and divide the mushroom mix between them. Top with grated Parmesan and bake for 15 minutes at 200C gas mark 6. Turn out onto a wire rack to cool. WCL-E01-S2
Eating out David Clensy
Sometimes you just want a pub to be a pub. Not a trendy bar. Not a ‘themed’ experience.
JAMMY JOB Danielle Dawkings with some of the preserves she sells with neighbour and partner Rachel Carson, under the name Mrs Mopps Chutneys and Preserves. Set up 18 months ago, the business, based in Carhampton near Minehead, sells its products at country markets, farm shops and restaurants PICTURE:FRAN FRANSTOTHARD STOTHARD PICTURE:
You know the sort of thing. Real ales. Open fire. Chattering conviviality. A bit of taxidermy on the walls. If it’s that sort of traditional pub you’re looking for – I have found the ideal spot. The Rising Sun is perched on Bowden Hill over the quaint National Trust-owned town of Lacock – far enough away from the period drama backdrop to mean it’s not constantly filled with tourists, but close enough so that once you’ve had your Sunday roast, you can quietly become one, and go for a little wander through Lacock’s charming streets, or around the National Trust-run Lacock Abbey. But be warned, you’re best to book ahead if you’re hoping to eat at the Rising Sun. It may have a large conservatory on the back, and a deceptively reasonable amount of seating in and around the bar, but even in the depths of winter the pub always seems to fill up at lunchtime – especially on a Sunday, when families descend on the place like the “Bisto kids” from the old adverts, having picked up the enticing waft of a Sunday roast on the breeze. Managers Chris and Julie Haslett have clearly done an excellent job of crafting a family pub, with an extensive beer garden for the summer months, boasting impressive views across the Wiltshire countryside, and with a team of friendly bar and waiting staff who welcome you into the pub as though they had known you all their lives. Away from the Sunday rush, the pub’s daily menus are full of local, seasonal produce – with familiar pub grub from sausage and mash (£9.95) to pie of the day (£10.95), offering homemade and unpretentious sustenance. We booked ahead a few days before our visit, and found ourselves rewarded with a cosy table next to a roaring fire. But even in mid-afternoon, the pub was packed with diners, and it was standing room only at the bar – though I was pleased to see that a rough-haired Jack Russell had managed to find himself a perch on a bar stool, and was waiting patiently to be served an ash-tray filled with beer. I presume the canine drinker is a local, as nobody turned a head while this bizarre scene unfolded. Indeed, the man sitting on the neighbouring stool seemed to be having a quiet conversation with him. I only managed to turn my attention away from the sociable little dog when I was handed a menu to examine. The food, like the pair of crackling fires, is hearty. The starters on offer included a homemade leek and potato soup (£4.95) and a homemade Scotch egg (£5.25). There was also a seafood cocktail on offer (£5.50), if you like that sort of thing. The mains seemed just as warm and homely. Roasted topside of beef, served with all the traditional Sunday trimmings (£11.95) looked to be something of a feast, served on enormous plates, piled high with generous portions. The roasted loin of pork (£11.95) and the homemade vegetable quiche (£9.25) also looked tempting, but in the end I fell for the fish and chips (£10), with the cod battered in Mole’s Ale and served with mushy peas and Tartare Sauce, which was – you guessed it, “homemade”. It was, quite possibly, the best battered fish I’ve had in recent years; certainly the best in a pub setting. My little boy clearly thought the same, as he devoured his child’s size portion, before he had time to be diverted by the stuffed
owl in a glass case that was frowning down at us throughout the meal, or even the little dog who was now knocking them back at the bar – and starting to look a bit leery. There was a high-pitched bark, and a brief growl towards the man beside him on the bar stool – who had clearly been jabbering on to him throughout our meal. The dog had clearly had enough, and so descended from the bar stool, gave a silent nod to his fellow bar stool drinkers, and staggered off into the cold afternoon air. Heading home, I imagine, to sleep it off. The big wooden door had slammed shut, fluttering the fires, long before anyone realised he had slipped off without paying his tab.
Venue The Rising Sun, Bowden Hill, Lacock, Wiltshire SN15 2PP Contact 01249 730363 www.therisingsunlacock.co.uk Price range Seafood cocktail starter (£5.50), Roasted loin of pork mains (£11.95), Deserts start around £4
The Rising Sun on Bowden Hill, above the town of Lacock in Wiltshire. It is, according to David Clensy, a proper pub with real ales, open fires and a ‘chattering conviviality’
SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013 WEST COUNTRY LIFE 13
Food Andy Welch
Considering we generally only eat turkey once a year, there’s a lot of fuss made about it. Butcher or supermarket, how big, where to store it? The beastly birds are so massive, they take up half the space in the average fridge or freezer. And then, finally, comes how to cook it. Delia Smith has a tried-and-tested recipe in her seminal Delia Smith’s Christmas, while Jamie Oliver, Heston Blumenthal, Gordon Ramsay and just about every other TV chef you can think of, have all had a go at coming up with their own twist on the traditional dish. Methods vary from brining it for 24 hours beforehand – that’s submerging it in a bucket of salty water flavoured with things like rosemary, garlic and clementine peel – to rubbing garlic and herb butter under the bird’s skin to make it crisp and golden, while the meat underneath – in theory – comes out moist. For all these techniques, though, turkey meat is always much of a muchness. Even a modest-sized bird comes in at about 10lb/ 4.5kg, with whoppers nearing 17lb on sale for larger families, meaning they need so long in the oven that, unless you concentrate on anything but that, it’ll end up dry as a bone. Gordon Ramsay’s take is to joint the bird first, roasting the breasts and legs separately, which dramatically reduces cooking time. That can only be a good thing, but it’s also worth remembering the instructions of Georges Auguste Escoffier, the godfather of French cuisine, who wrote in his 1903 book Le Guide Culinaire: “Roast in a moderate oven”. And that’s it. There are a few golden rules though, like getting the turkey up to room temperature before cooking. It takes a while, so if it’s in the fridge and you’re roasting on Christmas Day morning, take it out the night before. You should try to keep the bird moist too, with a bit of butter on the breast and perhaps some bacon. You could, however, just forgo turkey altogether and eat something else. After all, we only started eating turkey in the 16th century – Henry VIII was the first monarch to eat it as part of his festive feast – with goose and boar very popular before then. There’s an argument for eating whatever you like on Christmas Day, too. If you’d really be happier with steak and chips, why not have that? If you still want a focal point for a big meal but are tempted to break away from tradition, other joints are worth considering. A turkey wellington’s a perfect alternative for those who still want turkey but don’t want the hassle. You could make it a day or two in advance and just cook it on Christmas Day. If you still want poultry, maybe have a couple of chickens, or a cockerel for a stronger flavour and more meat. Guinea fowl, smaller than chickens, are particularly good too. A fore rib of beef is another alternative. This means shifting around some of the side dishes – you can’t serve it without Yorkshire puddings – but it’s worth it. And a cold beef sandwich with a load of mustard on Boxing Day is hard to beat.
Whatever you choose, remember to think about the size of your kitchen and oven space, ease of cooking and, above all, what you’ll actually enjoy. Tradition is important at Christmas, but tasty grub is essential. Here are three ideas for inspiration...
Turkey, brie and cranberry wellington Ingredients for eight Two x 500g blocks all-butter puff pastry; plain flour, for dusting; one egg, beaten For the stuffing: 2tblspns butter; one leek, finely sliced; 100g/4oz gammon, chopped; four sausages, skins removed; five sage leaves, chopped; 85g/3oz fresh breadcrumbs; salt and pepper For the filling: Two turkey breasts; 200g brie, sliced; 4-5tblspns cranberry sauce
For the filling, trim your turkey breasts: you want to create a long tube of meat in the middle of your wellington, similar in shape to a fillet of beef – you can use the trimmings in the stuffing, so don’t worry about wastage. Once you have the correct cylindrical shape, slice a pocket into the breasts, deep enough so that the brie and cranberry sauce will stay inside, but be careful not to cut all the way through. Divide the cranberry sauce and brie between the two turkey breasts, then chill in the fridge while you make the stuffing. For the stuffing, heat the butter in a frying pan and gently cook the leek for about five minutes. Don’t get too much colour on the leeks, you want them soft. Meanwhile, finely chop the turkey trimmings and add to the pan with the gammon. Cook for about five minutes, then remove and allow to cool slightly. Mix with the sausage meat, sage and breadcrumbs, then season. Roll out the first block of pastry on a floured surface to about the thickness of a £1 coin: you want a long, thin shape that’s about 5cm wider than the turkey breast and 5cm longer than the length of the turkey breasts placed end to end. Gently lift this onto a baking sheet and put the turkey breasts on top, followed by the stuffing. Roll out the second block of pastry, brush the edge of the bottom sheet with egg and lay the top one over. Trim edges to neaten, then crimp together. Can be made up to one day in advance and chilled. Heat oven to 200C. Brush the wellington with more beaten egg and, with a sharp knife, score a crisscross pattern, but don’t cut all the way through. Cook for 30 minutes, then cover with foil and cook for another 30-45 minutes. After one hour, check that the middle is hot by inserting a skewer for five seconds – it should feel hot to the touch. Leave to rest for 15 minutes, then slice to serve.
14 WEST COUNTRY LIFE SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013
Traditionally, as a nation, we all go for turkey on Christmas Day but it can be notoriously difficult to cook just right, so why not try some alternatives for your festive table such as, pictured from the top on opposite page, turkey, brie and cranberry wellington; Christmas goose with root veg, sticky pears and bramble gravy; or rare beef with mustard Yorkshires WCL-E01-S2
Rare beef with mustard Yorkshires
Method Remove all the fat from inside the bird and use a skewer to prick the goose skin all over, especially under the wings. If you have time (though not essential), sit the goose in a sink, then slowly and carefully pour over three kettles of boiling water. Dry with kitchen paper, then leave for one hour or so to dry completely. This will help the skin crisp. Heat oven to 200C. Season the goose cavity with salt and pepper and stuff with the oranges, two bay leaves and the thyme. Rub the breast and legs with two tablespoons of oil and season generously with salt. Lay the carrots in the middle of a very large roasting tin. Sit the bird the right way up on top of the carrots. In a bowl, toss the parsnips and turnips with the rest of the oil and bay leaves, then scatter around the goose. Cover the tin with a large piece of foil, scrunching it up at the sides so it’s a tight fit. Place the goose in the oven for one and a half hours. Take the goose out of the oven. Remove the foil and carefully use a baster to suck out most of the fat from the tin into a bowl. Lightly baste the goose and turn the parsnips. Re-cover with foil and roast for another one and a half hours. Suck the fat from the pan again and baste, then increase the heat to 220C. Return to the oven without any foil to brown for a final 30-40 minutes until golden brown. Remove the goose from the oven and transfer to a large board or platter to rest in a warmish place for 30 minutes. Scoop the vegetables out into another roasting tin and keep warm in a low oven. Keep the goose tin to finish making the gravy in. To make the gravy, remove the oranges from the goose using tongs. Pour off all the fat from the roasting tin into a bowl (keep it for your roasties). Scatter the sugar into the tin and stir to scrape off any tasty brown bits. Splash in the vinegar, simmer down until practically dry, then stir in the jelly to dissolve, bubble and cook down. Finally, add the stock and squeeze in the juice from the oranges. Bring everything to the boil, then strain into a jug or small saucepan to reheat later. Peel and halve the pears. Use a teaspoon to scoop out the cores, then cut the pears into quarters. In a bowl, toss the pears in the icing sugar until completely coated. Heat a large frying pan over a high flame and add the pears to the pan. Cook for one minute or so, tossing constantly, until the pears are well caramelised and slightly burnt around the edges. Serve the goose on a platter surrounded by watercress and pear wedges. Serve the slowroasted vegetables in a separate bowl and the gravy in a gravy boat.
Ingredients for eight Four garlic cloves; 2tblspns lemon thyme leaves; 1tblspn black peppercorns; 1tblspn wholegrain mustard; four anchovies; 2tblspns olive oil; 2.7kg rib of beef (ask your butcher for it French-trimmed), at room temperature; 1216 potatoes, peeled and halved or quartered; 4tblspns sunflower oil For the Yorkshires: 175ml full-fat milk; two large eggs and one large egg white; 1tblspn wholegrain mustard; 115g/4oz plain flour; ¼tspn salt; goose fat or sunflower oil
Heat oven to 220C. Using a large pestle and mortar, grind the garlic, thyme, peppercorns, mustard, anchovies and olive oil to a paste. Rub the mixture all over the beef and put in a large roasting tin. Roast for 25 minutes, then turn down the oven to 160C. Remove the pan from the oven, add the potatoes and toss in the fat, adding four tablespoons of sunflower oil. Return to the oven for another 90 minutes for rare; two hours for medium rare. Meanwhile, make the Yorkshires. Make the milk up to 225ml with water. Beat the eggs, egg white, mustard and milk together, then gradually add the flour and quarter of a teaspoon of salt – the batter should be the consistency of thin double cream. Pour into a jug. Take the meat out of the oven, cover and leave to rest, then turn the oven up to 220C. Put one tablespoon of goose fat or oil into each of the eight large Yorkshire pudding tins and heat for 15 minutes in the oven, with the potatoes on a lower shelf. Pour the batter into the tins, then cook for 15-20 minutes, until risen and golden. Serve with horseradish, gravy and your favourite veg.
Christmas goose with root veg, sticky pears and bramble gravy Ingredients for six-eight 4-5kg oven-ready goose, trussed for roasting; two oranges; four bay leaves; a bunch of thyme; 3tblspns sunflower oil; eight medium carrots, peeled but left whole; eight medium parsnips, peeled but left whole; four turnips, peeled and halved; salt and pepper For the bramble gravy: 1tblspn golden caster sugar; 100ml good-quality red wine vinegar; ½ jar bramble jelly (Tiptree does a good one; if you can’t find it, use blackberry jam); 100ml strong chicken stock For the pears: six pears; 2tblspns icing sugar; large bag watercress, to serve
Comfort food Rosa Mashiter We all spend a terrific amount of time and energy on the run-up to Christmas, and it is rare that we manage to please all of the people all of the time with regard to food. Personally I like Christmas dishes on Christmas Day alone – after all you can only eat so much turkey, pudding, cake and mince pies. What usually happens over the festive season is that I find a steady flow of friends dropping in – which I thoroughly enjoy, so I am embarking on a bit of a bake-off...
Earl grey and sultana muffins Ingredients for 12 450ml boiling water; two Earl Grey tea bags; 175g sultanas; 75g melted butter; 335g plain flour; 1tblspn baking powder; 75g caster sugar; 15ml Demerara sugar
Pour the boiling water over the tea bags and allow to infuse for just six minutes. Strain the hot tea onto the sultanas and leave to soak for an hour. Line a muffin tin with 12 paper muffin cases. Strain the tea into a measuring jug and make up to 300ml with some milk if necessary.
In a basin beat the eggs and the melted butter together. Sift the flour and baking powder into a mixing bowl and stir in the caster sugar and sultanas. Add the tea and butter mixtures and stir until blended, taking care not to overmix. Spoon evenly into the muffin cases, then sprinkle each muffin with Demerara sugar. Bake in a preheated oven at 200C (Gas mark 6) for 25 minutes. Allow to cool then serve as is or split and buttered.
remove from the oven and allow to cool on the baking tray then carefully lift each one off, carefully using a palette knife, and place on a wire rack. Break the chocolate up into pieces and put into a small bowl placed over a saucepan of hot water and stir gently until melted. Spread a little of the chocolate over the flat side of the Florentine and leave to set.
Cranberry and chocolate orange florentines
Will go very well with a glass of wine or sherry. 25g butter; 1tbspn caster sugar; generous pinch of sea salt; generous pinch cayenne; 1tspn ground cumin; generous pinch of ground coriander; generous pinch of ground ginger; 300g mixed nuts
Ingredients for 18-20 Line a large baking tray with non-stick baking parchment 40g butter; 75ml double cream; 50g caster sugar; 50g flaked and chopped almonds; 25g chopped mixed peel; 50g chopped dried cranberries; 40g plain flour; 100g bar of plain orange chocolate
Preheat your oven to 180C (Gas mark 4). Put the butter, cream and sugar into a medium sized non-stick saucepan and place over a low heat, stirring until blended together, then slowly bring to the boil and then remove from the heat and add the nuts peel and cranberries. Finally stir in the flour. Drop teaspoons of mixture on to the baking ray leaving plenty of space for the mixture to spread, and flatten each one a little with a palette knife. Bake for 10 to 12 minutes,
Over a medium heat melt the butter in a frying pan. Add the sugar, salt and all the spices together with just a tablespoon of water and cook until bubbling. Add the nuts and cook, stirring all the time, till well coated and the sugar begins to caramelise. Remove from the heat and spread the nuts out on a baking sheet and allow to cool completely.
Foodie treat Mark Taylor If you are choosing duck for the festive season, look out for the Freedom Food label, which indicates a bird sourced from a farm assessed to strict RSPCA standards. Chef, author and broadcaster Valentine Warner is a supporter of Freedom Food ducks and he has created a number of recipes for Christmas, including his own version of the old classic duck à l’orange with watercress. He says: “Christmas in the Warner household is chaos, but the one thing my friends and family can guarantee is ingredients that can be eaten with a clear conscience.” ■ For more recipes, go to: www.freedomfood.co.uk
Duck a l’orange with watercress Ingredients for four One medium size Freedom Food-labelled fatty duck; a little sunflower oil; sea salt; 1tspn dried rosemary; rind of one medium orange and juice of three oranges; black pepper; 250ml red wine; one double-sized thumb of ginger, finely grated; two dessertspoon runny honey; 50g fridge-cold butter
Preheat the oven to 220°C / fan oven 200°C / Gas Mark 7. Put the duck on a rack in a roasting tray (or straight into the bottom of it) and rub all over with a little sunflower oil. Season very generously with salt and plenty of dried rosemary. Roast in the oven for half an hour or so. before checking. The skin should be nice and brown. Pour off any excess fat into a bowl. Turn down the heat to 180°C/ fan oven 160°C / Gas Mark 4 and roast the duck for another hour or so. If not ready, continue to cook for increments of 15 minutes.
Duck a l’orange with watercress While the duck cooks, cut the ends off one of the four oranges. Stand it on a board and cut the rind off in strips vertically, all the way round, taking care to cut only the rind and not the white pith. Stack the slices and slice them lengthways as thinly as you possibly can. Put the rind in a small saucepan and just cover with water. Bring to the boil and tip away the water. Cover again and re-boil for four minutes. Drain and leave to one side. Now squeeze all four oranges. Reserve the pip-free juice for later. When the duck is ready, remove to a carving board to rest, covered with a loose bit of foil and a tea towel. Pour as much of the excess fat from the roasting tray as possible and put the tray back over a medium heat. Stir the wine into the sticky duck juices in the bottom of the tray followed by the orange juice. Squeeze the juice too from the grated ginger. Bring to a very rapid simmer and reduce the gravy until it is barely less than syrupy (reduced by about two thirds). Stir in the honey and orange rind. Whisk in the knobs of butter until the sauce is glossy, creamy looking and thickened, then transfer to a warm jug or bowl. Carve the duck and serve with the sauce. Arrange the duck in the middle of plates and spoon around the sauce. Sautéed potatoes are a fine accompaniment. Serve with the watercress dressed with a little walnut oil, red wine vinegar or lemon juice and some salt.
SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013 WEST COUNTRY LIFE 15
Absolute Corkers Ned Halley
Watering hole The White Hart, Trudoxhill Ned Halley
Make sure you pick the perfect bottle to go with your Christmas dinner this year. Ned Halley has a few ideas whether it’s red or white
Christmas feasts call for classic wines. The reds and whites of Burgundy are perfect. This is because they complement both fish and fowl. And there are countless delectable alternatives to choose from too. I’ve lined up a dozen seasonal favourites.
Louis Latour Bourgogne Pinot Noir 2012 (Waitrose and Majestic £11.99) is what I call a classic red burgundy. This is a young, vigorous wine with a pellucid ruby colour and textbook pinot noir aromas of bright fresh cherries and raspberries. The fruit corresponds fully, flooding the tastebuds with vivid juicy flavours clothed in a firm but gentle grip of tannin. It’s the perfect red wine with fatty, rich and complicated dishes, in particular turkey with all the trimmings, or Boxing Day cold cuts complete with spicy chutneys and pickles. Versatile and distinctive. Arc du Rhone Chateauneuf du Pape 2011, reduced at Waitrose from £20.49 to £13.49 is a dramatically good wine at a dramatically reduced price. I thought it decent value even at the full price when tasting it earlier in the year, so now it looks a proper Christmas bargain. It’s a lovely slinky, nuanced and spicy red in the classic Chateauneuf style, unexpectedly mellow and developed for such a recent (though excellent) vintage. Needs a meaty match. Medici Riccardi Riserva Chianti Classico 2010 at £7.99 from Lidl just has to be my Christmas Chianti choice. It comes in a portentouslooking bottle and has typical cask-aged Chianti character – plummy, defined, coolly minty dark fruit with a textbook dry edge to the poised and elegantly weighted juiciness. Smart wine at a smart price. Barbera d’Asti 2010 at £9.99 from Lidl is a fine expression of this popular Piedmont red. From a small estate charmingly named Alice Bel Colle, it has typical dark blueberry fruit with
plenty of perky bounce and a lick of richness. Lovely match for the turkey. Rioja Campo Aldea Graciano 2008 (Marks & Spencer £12.99) is my pick from a crowded field of brilliant Rioja reds this year. This one, made from graciano grapes in place of the customary tempranillo and garnacha, jangles with juicy blackcurrant richness and smooth creaminess, a blissful marriage of vigour and velvet. It will do justice to any kind of roast from beef to birds of any feather. Kanonkop Kadette 2011, reduced at Sainsbury’s from £9.99 to £8.49, might not be an instinctive Christmas choice, but this is a classic red from one of South Africa’s best-rated estates, the Kanonkop in Stellenbosch, at what seems an unnecessarily reasonable price. It is a delectably savoury blend of indigenous pinotage grapes with cabernet sauvignon and merlot and has a minty lift to the dark fruit with a hint of the cedar note you find in the better kind of claret. A conversation piece, and a fine partner to roast ham.
Louis Latour Viré Clessé 2010 (Wine Rack shop at Henleaze, Bristol £12.49) is a proper white burgundy of true chardonnay character, ripe, creamy and lush (though without any oak contact) with an ideal balance between richness and crisp freshness. Viré Clessé is the newest (1999) appellation in the Maconnais region of southern Burgundy, and one of its most distinctive. A lavish match for all kinds of seasonal treats from shelffish and smoked salmon to the turkey itself. Ladoix Le Clou d’Orge 2010 (£18.99 from Cambridge Wines, Salisbury, and winedirect.com) Ladoix might not be among the best-known of the vineyard appellations of Burgundy’s Cotes
16 WEST COUNTRY LIFE SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013
de Beaune, but judging by this gorgeous white wine it’s a name to look out for. Made by esteemed Burgundy producer Louis Jadot from chardonnay grapes grown in the premier cru vineyard of Le Clou d’Orge, this is an extravagant greeny-gold, oak-matured dry wine with peachy-pineapple aromas and plump, buttery richness counterpointed by apple crispness and a citrus twang at the edge of the flavour. It’s exactly what a fine white burgundy should be and the price, for this sort of quality, is not outrageous. Marimar Estate Acero Chardonnay 2009 at £25.54 online from vintagemarque.com (order by 18 December for Christmas delivery) is a sunny, exotic Californian twist on the white burgundy style. Marimar is the Sonoma County estate of Marimar Torres from the famed Spanish wine dynasty. Acero in the name is Spanish for steel, telling you the wine is made in stainless steel tanks, with no oak contact. But this is by no means a steely wine; it’s gorgeously plush and ripe, racily pure with sweet-citrus highlights, long and lavish in flavour. The maker recommends it with tapas and light dishes. I suggest shellfish. Gossaume Les Sauterelles Touraine Sauvignon Blanc 2012 (£9.95 from Lea & Sandeman – look online for delivery details) is the wine I would most like to drink with smoked salmon this Christmas. Completely new to me, this is Loire Valley sauvignon of extraordinary intensity and interest, abounding with classic grassy-gooseberry white-fruit flavours, wildly tangy savour and stimulating freshness. It’s comparable with Sancerre in style, only more so. Seifried Estate Sweet Agnes Riesling 2012 37.5cl bottle (larger Waitrose branches – or online – at £13.99) is my favourite “pudding wine” from New Zealand. Modelled on the rare and fabulously expensive beerenauslese rieslings of Germany, this is a honeyed white wine of limpid luxuriance, modest alcohol (10.5 per cent) and surpassing balance. It is ambrosially sweet but pristine in its purity of fruit; you’ll detect the classic apple crispness of the Riesling grape and the inimitable racy twang of lime in the natural acidity. A partner, if you must, to the Christmas pudding. Better, though, to savour it chilled as an aperitif with a nut or as a de luxe counterpoint to dried fruit or salty blue cheese.
It has been at the centre of the village of Trudoxhill near Frome since 1625. Probably first a farmhouse, it did time as a smithy before becoming the pub. High days came in the Second World War, when American GIs, stationed nearby, flocked here to jive with Somerset lasses to the racy rhythms of swing music. Lately, this handsome old place has been a bit quieter. It has changed hands too often. “The White Hart has seen many new landlords over the years,” says current owner Graeme Barry on the pub’s website “and we are proud to say we are the longest running at six years”. Yes, Graeme and his partner Crystal took over here way back in 2007. It might sound a brief enough residence, but this landlord has every right to take pride in his staying power. Making a living from a village pub in the current climate is no easy matter. Pop in as we did on a chilly lunchtime last week, and you’ll soon see how he’s doing it. Once through the reassuringly massive old studded oak door, you’re in a cosy, warmly lit interior. It’s darkly panelled with small, deepset windows and a low, beamed ceiling. It feels properly rustic with its exposed stone walls and sense of being low in the ground. It’s a foodie freehouse – home-made pies are a well-known speciality – but that’s proper pub food at proper pub prices. It’s not a gastropub. And it’s a drinker’s pub. Ales on the day included Fir King Good (ho ho ho) from Brains of Cardiff, a December brew, amber, tangy and nourishing, and beautifully kept. Hairy Hooker from Plain Ales of Salisbury was dark and malty with a toasty savour. There was Pot Holer from Cheddar Ales besides. When Mrs Halley dithered over her choice of ales the young woman serving at once offered her a taste – a very good sign of a good pub. We lunched on one of the famous pies, chicken, bacon and leek, plus chips and peas, and ham, egg and chips (what else?) for me. Both cost £7.95. All was excellent. Cracking pub. If you want to see how it’s done, head for the White Hart.
Wine of the Week The Wine Selection Marsanne 2012 at £4.50 from Asda is a classic party dry white. The price is an obvious lure, but this generously coloured, fresh-fruitsalad refresher is a crackingly good wine by any standard.
The White Hart, Trudoxhill, Somerset BA11 5DP. Tel 01373 836324
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THE PERFECT CHRISTMAS PRESENT PLEASE QUOTE ‘WESTERN DAILY PRESS’ WHEN BOOKING WCL-E01-S2
SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013 WEST COUNTRY LIFE 17
Shopping Gabrielle Fagan
We’re all in need of a bit of cheer as cold winds bite and the darkest days set in. Rooms that glow with rich, deep reds and plum berry shades, with a few luxe touches, can make all the difference to our mood. This colour palette is a perennial favourite, and adding even one of these shades via small details is an easy way to update a decor scheme. “Statement home accessories in berry and plum tones create a sumptuous, regal feel in the home at Christmas,” says Abigail Bomford, head of design at Asda. “Use jewellery for the home – rugs, vases, lamps, cushions or throws – perfect for creating an opulent and warm ambience.” These rich tones, which have found favour in our wardrobes, also work well as accent colours on a feature wall, she advises, especially with a neutral colour palette. Interior designer, Joanna Wood, agrees that these jewel shades have the power to enrich decor and conjure drama and atmosphere. “The key to achieving a rich interior scheme without overdoing it, is to get the correct balance of dark ruby and purple colours for the room,” she says.
Best berry buys Dunelm’s a super source for red homeware, especially if you’re on a budget. Get organised with its Rose and Ellis Allexton Collection Red Memo Board, £9.99, ideal for pinning up festive ‘to do’ lists. Cosy bedrooms are essential for relaxing after shopping trips, and it wouldn’t break the bank to indulge in its bright red and white spot pattern, Rose and Ellis Oakley Collection Duvet Cover Set, from £34.99. Plunder the store’s accessories, which includes a Large Ruby Table Lamp, £9.99, Rose Floral Cushion, £6.99, red Knitted Pom Pom Throw, £24.99, and Egyptian Cotton Towels, from 99p. The Velvet Lab’s Fado Oval Stool in red velvet, £189.08, could make a luxurious perch.
“Work towards a smarter, more sophisticated scheme with a focal wall in light berry hues, a safe alternative to black. “If you want to tone down the effect, contrast with pale creams and perhaps russet, cranberry or scarlet reds, in alcoves or a feature wall, in dining rooms. “Natural materials – deep brown leather furniture and deep plum or red cushions and throws – are the key ingredients for a soothing sanctuary.”
The colour purple Embrace your home’s dark side with evocative shades of deep aubergine through to light heather. Ian Bissett, design director at Multiyork, says: “Shades of plum bring interest and depth to a room and will effortlessly ‘pop’ against an understated background. “A statement piece of furniture in a berry colour upholstery is a good investment – choosing a patterned fabric will enliven a plain scheme – as these shades feature strongly in next year’s home collections. “Combine a mix of the shades in accessories to tie the look together, and ensure your home’s on trend all year round.”
Red berry recipe Red is the colour of passion and friendliness and, of course, the signature colour of Christmas, so it’s perfectly suited to warming cold winter rooms. “If you simply use bursts of the colour in room details you’ll ensure you’re not overpowered by the shade,” says Carole Brown, director of marketing at Dunelm. “Complement a red scheme with metallics for a touch of glamour and sophistication.”
Pick of the plums
Snuggle into an Ellingwood Armchair, in Casoria Plum fabric, from £749-£949, Marks & Spencer. Purple’s a key shade at OKA next season and its elegant Nicolai chair, from £449, can be upholstered in a mouth-watering Damson velvet fabric. Oliver Bonas, rapidly gaining a reputation for an uber-stylish range, has a Velvet Button Stool, £285, in a variety of colours including Currant, a deep plum. Add matching Velvet Cushions, £32 each. Laurence Llewelyn-Bowen’s the master of decadence and his Bel Canto bedding, a lavishly patterned collection in plum, from £39, Littlewoods, doesn’t disappoint. Feel free to flirt with the shade. Joanna Wood’s Grape Mohair Throw, £76, could dress up a sofa. Display photographs in Abigail Ahern Edition Designer dark pink marbled photo frames, £15 each, Debenhams. Update a bathroom with plum towels, a six-piece plain dyed towel bale, £12, Isme.
Berry bunch Asda: www.direct.asda.com Debenhams: 08445 616 161/ www.debenhams.com Dunelm: www.dunelm-mill.com Isme: 0844 811 8112/www.isme.com Joanna Wood: 020 7730 5064/ www.joannawood.co.uk Littlewoods: 0870 599 1111/ www.littlewoodsdirect.com Made: 0845 557 6888/www.made.com Marks & Spencer: 0845 302 1234/ www.marksandspencer.com Multiyork: 0845 303 7134/www.multiyork.co.uk Neptune: 01793 427 427/www.neptune.com OKA: 0844 815 7380/www.okadirect.com Oliver Bonas: 020 8974 0110/ www.oliverbonas.com Poundland: www.poundland.co.uk Stuff of Dreams:01280 820 533/ www.stuffofdreams.com Talking Tables: 020 7627 6767/ www.talkingtables.co.uk The Velvet Lab: 01282 471 610/ www.thevelvetlab.com
Cooking & so Much More Come and see our selection of woodburning, gas and electric Esse range cookers on display, also available in oil, and with back boilers to heat your home. We offer a full installation service We also have over 100 woodburning stoves on display along with wicker log baskets, companion sets, coal hods, spark guards, spares and accessories. Sundays Hill, Almondsbury, Bristol BS32 4DS
18 WEST COUNTRY LIFE SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013
From the top, red honeycomb baubles; plum towels set; ruby table lamp; and a dark pink marbled-effect photograph frame WCL-E01-S2
Shopping Lisa Haynes
Hepsey sequin jacket, £198; Cheston crew knit, £89.50; Hilmead skinny velvet jeans, £59.50; Highmoor red tartan shirt, £49.50; Exelby skirt, £59.50; all Jack Wills (www.jackwills.com)
A fashionable Christmas and new year demands a versatile wardrobe. When else in the year are you likely to change from snowman jumper to sequin dress on the same day? But you don’t need to plan entire outfit changes for the December festivities; a few simple tweaks can take a risque get-up to auntie appropriate in no time. Switch effortlessly from desk to dancefloor, or PJs to glad rags, with casualwear upgrade trickery. Look to Santa Claus for inspiration – a statement black belt completes that classic red suit! Try these transition wonders that work around the festive clock.
Office party Streamers and shots might start flowing at 7pm, but you have a full working day at your desk first. The solution? “Transform from working girl to glamour puss by choosing your daytime pieces well in the first place,” advises Annebelle van Tongeren, author of Dress Like A Star. Pick out your favourite party frock, or glam top and separates, and turn down the glamour for daytime with a fluffy sweater layered over the top. Avoid jumpers that shed on to your
Christmas Day It’s the ultimate lazy day but you can still be slouchy and chic on December 25, with some tactical layering. “Use more feminine fabrics for the pieces under neath,” advises van Tongeren. “Silk camis hiding under big knits will transform your look from day to night in seconds.” For present opening, opt for patterned, silky pyjama trousers for a glam take on frumpy flannel PJs. Team with a cami underneath a novelty festive jumper, so you can take your look from daytime Christmas table to after-dark turkey canapes – you shouldn’t be cold with the fire roaring and sherry-induced glow. TWINKLY TRANSFORMER: Move to evening mode with luxe chandelier earrings that rival the baubles on the Christmas tree.
dress underneath and ruin the effect when you unveil. The use of colour can be powerful too,” suggests van Tongeren. “Pick the hue up in your shoes as well and you’ve changed your working look entirely.” TWINKLY TRANSFORMER: Metallic party heels will elevate you to dizzy diva heights.
New Year’s Eve
Happy holidays Feet up by the fire? Not with last-minute presents to buy, then delivery rounds to get through and relatives to see. Straight or skinny jeans will take you from day to night but team with sparkly flat shoes – perfect for pounding pavements, and looking pretty for grandma. If you have a big family gathering, change into a gilt-edged sequin or metallic top to impress your relatives. “The addition of metallics is an easy solution for anything revolving around denim, as it gives a glamorous night-time edge to the versatility of jeans,” says van Tongeren. “You could also add luxe textures, such as velvet and satin trims, to pieces that will work with denim for evening.” TWINKLY TRANSFORMER: A sparkly blazer is ideal for when you want to smarten up some old denim jeans or a pair of chinos.
Marks & Spencer Limited Edition gem embellished shell top, £39.50, top; Office Tinsel glitter loafers, £65; and Martine Wester Cosmic statement medallion earrings, £87
In an ideal world, we would all have hours to perfect our last party look of 2013. In the real world, though, it might be more like 15 minutes flat. If you’ve been on the go all day, stick to a trusty LBD for a fail-safe foundation that you can build your look around, with some wellchosen accessories and outerwear that wows. “Dresses are simple to transform,” assures van Tongeren. “The change of subtle day jewellery to something more sparkly, the addition of a killer coat, and some glamorous high heels replacing your sensible shoes and you are ready to go.” Intensify your make-up with a bold lip or touch of shimmer and finish off your outfit with some arm candy, in the form of a bling watch ready for the big New Year’s Eve countdown. TWINKLY TRANSFORMER: An eye-catching statement necklace will instantly make your dress look dance-floor ready.
SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013 WEST COUNTRY LIFE 19
Books Angela James
How can I encourage my children to read? That is a question I am frequently asked. Yet, as a children’s author, I know that every week there is a wealth of new titles being published with excellent children’s books available in shops and libraries. Therefore, it doesn’t appear to be due to a lack of reading material, so, why the question? Partly, it is due to modern life and new factors competing for our children’s time. As parents and grandparents, we didn’t have to learn computer skills as soon as we started school, or had mobile phones, tablets and social media. These developments are now a part of everyday living. Many children also have extra-curricular activities alongside homework and weekend sports and hobbies. Then, consider children wanting to watch television or play computer games; soon it becomes clear that finding a regular time to encourage our children to read has become increasingly difficult. But even if time is limited, there are still some practical points for parents to help. For example, reading for as little as ten minutes a day really can make a difference. But whether it’s ten minutes or longer, it’s important to make it quality time, with the ‘little and often’ approach rather than one long weekly session. For example, the ‘traditional’ book at bedtime, where parents read to their children every night, creates strong memories of reading for pleasure. Sharing stories and books together is a wonderful gift to give a child. Someone once asked, ‘How long should I keep reading with my children,’ and I answered, ‘For as long as your children continue to enjoy it.’ Once they show signs of moving on, be proud of their reading independence. Keep reading fun. Children vary in their learning abilities, but approaching it with enjoyment develops a positive attitude. One method I use on a one-to-one basis for young readers in schools is to provide glove puppets, so that they choose who they are going to read with. At home, parents can use a favourite toy or character for the same purpose. Other fun reading can be through agerelated children’s magazines on a subject they like; maybe one on super-heroes or a popular television programme. If they are already familiar with the characters, they will begin learning without realising it as they participate in the activities, the colouring pages or short stories.
Make books a part of your lives. Show by example how you appreciate books too. Think back to your own childhood. Ask yourself what ignited your interest in books and see if it could help your own children. Was it a particular author or genre? Or perhaps it was the adventure and escapism as your mind entered the world of books. For me, it was reading about adventures, classic fairy tales and anything with magic. A book was the beginning of a journey. I became an avid reader but wanted to write these kinds of stories as well. It was a childhood dream and might have been left that way, but for one thing. I attended a school in Lydney and during one English lesson the teacher asked us to write about what we could see from the school window. I wrote about the heat of the summer’s afternoon forming a blue haze over the distant Cotswolds. The River Severn was a widening thread of silver-mercury as it unwound its way to the Severn Bridge. The bridge looked like two upright pencils that were linked by cobweb threads and I felt that I could knock it over with one finger. Afterwards, I was asked to read out my essay and then praised for my descriptive skills. The memory of that moment stayed with me. Eventually my childhood ambition became a reality and I became an author writing about the magic and fantasy genre I adored as a child. In my first title The Golden Moonbeam, the hero, Mailliw, receives a black diamond but he doesn’t understand how valuable it is until later in the plot. At the beginning of the second book, The Theft Of The Black Diamond, the diamond is stolen and Mailliw’s friend, Princess Frija, arrives with terrible news. Her father, King Pomidor, has accused their friend, the Guardian of the Winter Mountains, of stealing the black diamond and their countries are now on the brink of war. To prove who the real thief is, they must go to the goblin city of Deep South, home of the vampire cats and dangerous creatures called the Leatherback Clan. I hope that within my books readers will experience adventure and excitement and find that reading is magical in its own right. Just imagine the day your children ask for another book to read – that’s when you will know you conquered the question, ‘How can I encourage my children to read?’
The Theft Of The Black Diamond by Angela James is published by Acorn, priced £6.99
Author Angela James who writes magic and fantasy books aimed at a young audience. She has loved the genre since she was a youngster and hopes her books will encourage children to read for pleasure
Our competition to win a copy of the book Hope Bourne’s Exmoor proved very popular, with 137 entries. The winners chosen at random from those entries are: Paul Swift of Bath; Jennifer Burton of Easton, Somerset; Bernard Bennett of Hereford; Mrs D Hedges of Hanham, Bristol; Eleanor Norman of Cannards Grave, Shepton Mallet, Somerset.
Books reviews Cockroaches by Jo Nesbo is published in hardback by Harvill Secker, priced £18.99 (ebook £7.99) Cockroaches is the second outing for Nesbo’s fractured Norwegian policeman, Harry Hole. Other outings have showed he is a flawed character, but for his fans, this – and his battle against the bottle – is what gives him his charm and fascination. This time, Hole is called on to investigate the murder of the Norwegian ambassador in Bangkok. This classic fastpaced, edge-of-the-seat stuff will thrill Harry Hole addicts, as he battles against time to solve the crime.
20 WEST COUNTRY LIFE SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013
The Language of Dying by Sarah Pinborough is published as a reprint in hardback by Jo Fletcher Books, priced £12.99 (ebook £6.02).
Who is Who? The Philosophy of Doctor Who by Kevin S Decker is published in paperback original by I. B. Tauris, priced £15.99.
More well-known for her horror writing, acclaimed novelist Pinborough returns with a dark, compelling novel about caring for a terminally-ill parent. It reads as a letter to the narrator’s father, who has lung cancer. At times it can make for some uncomfortable reading. But Pinborough’s ability to write so beautifully, even about such a sensitive topic, means you cannot help but read on.
To mark 50 years since everyone’s favourite time traveller first stepped into his Tardis, this is an indepth investigation into what makes Doctor Who tick. Psychology professor Kevin Decker approaches the task from an academic point of view but the tone is lighthearted with a good dollop of humour. Hardcore Doctor Who fans will love it but casual readers may struggle with the detail and intensity. WCL-E01-S2
Books Martin Hesp
The centenary of the beginning of the First World War will be upon us soon. In just over six months’ time war memorials across the West Country will be busy as military personnel, historians, journalists, politicians and families whose loved ones perished in one of the worst conflicts ever fought prepare to remember those who paid the ultimate sacrifice. But before we are swept up in memories of the French trenches and Flanders battlegrounds, a well known West Country poet and writer believes we ought to take time to recall another war that cost this region dear, before its story dwindles into the dusk of time. James Crowden says it is important to remember and try to understand the Boer War before we look back at the much bigger, more ruinous conflict fought on European soil. And, to that end, he has put together a collection of poems, anecdotes and vignettes which look at the language of the South African war and charts the origins and progress of this long forgotten military action. Using contemporary sources from the time, diaries, letters, newspaper reports, verbatim accounts and poems to get a real feel for the war as it unfolded and to show how these cataclysmic events were recorded at the time and why the war had such an impact on public consciousness worldwide. James had two great uncles who fought in the Boer War, one of whom later worked in Somerset at a paper mill at Creech St Michael. He also discovered there were three people in his home village of Winsham, near Chard, who had close connections to the Siege of Ladysmith – one of the most famous incidents in the South African conflict which cost so many British personnel their lives. After uncovering a wealth of new material and photographs including a set of diaries belonging to his grandfather who served in the Coldstream Guards at some important battles – James set about writing From Ladysmith to Archangel – The Language of War – Part One The Boer War 1899-1902. He said: “There is a lot about the war that has great relevance to the West Country – the Devon regiment had one battalion inside the Siege of Ladysmith, and another battalion outside under General Buller, a Devon man, part of the relief force. “One moving excerpt in the book is from a newspaper report describing the two battalions meeting after many months of hard fighting.” He explained: “This is the first volume of a two-part work. The second volume which will come out in 2014 and covers The First World War – and ends up in Archangel in Northern Russia as part of the Russian Civil War when British troops were evacuated in September 1919.” In writing this first volume James says he was amazed to find such a rich cast of well known characters, including Sherlock Holmes author Arthur Conan Doyle, who worked as a doctor in a field hospital during a typhoid outbreak. Rudyard Kipling, gets a mention – he briefly edited a newspaper called The Friend in Bloemfontein. Mohandas – later Mahatma – Gandhi figures too – he acted as stretcher bearer under fire at the Battle of Spion Kop – a costly action about which Winston Churchill was later to write: “Corpses lay here and there. Many of the wounds were of a horrible nature. The splinters and fragments of the shells had torn and mutilated them.” Churchill himself features in the new book – he was captured when an armoured train was
ambushed and he later famously managed to escape. His intrepid aunt Lady Sarah Wilson, who was captured after she’d been asked to leave Mafeking for her own safety by one Colonel Robert Baden-Powell after the Boers threatened to storm the British garrison. Having set off on a madcap adventure in the company of her maid, travelling through the South African countryside, she was finally captured by the enemy – but later returned to the town in exchange for a horse thief being held there. She became the first woman war correspondent, writing a column for the Daily Mail. James discovered that the Dutch-born artist Vincent van Gogh had a third brother, Cornelis, who fought on the Boer side in a Commando unit. He was captured and died in a British Army hospital. The Somerset-based author writes: “The Boer War was in some ways a proxy war and, rather like the Spanish Civil War, had many international followers who served as commandos. “The Boer War was also used as testing ground for weapons and tactics. It paved the way for First World War in much the same way that the Spanish Civil War opened the gates for the Second World War. Many German military advisers and specialists fought on the Boer side and were captured.” James has also looked at the involvement of other European countries in supplying arms and men to help the Boers. “There were searchlights, machine guns, barbed wire, war balloons and mausers, as well as long-range artillery and high explosives. Here were diamond mines, gold mines, towns under siege, set piece battles, snipers, disease, nurses, concentration camps well as a very hard fought guerrilla war,” he said. Perhaps most importantly, James has taken what he describes as an experimental approach to writing military history, laying the book out as if it was poetry to give the language “a chance to breathe”. His aim has been to make military history more accessible to a far wider audience and, in doing so, enable non-military-historians to understand what it was like to be there. In places the author has utilised oral history interviews which he recorded many years ago to reveal the kind of language which they used to convey thoughts and feelings about a war “which should never really have happened.”
From Ladysmith to Archangel – The Language of War – Part One: The Boer War 1899-1902 by James Crowden is published by Flagon Press, priced £18.95 From top: A patrol on horseback in 1899: The 2nd Devons entering Ladysmith in March 1900 and stretcherbearers of the Indian Ambulance Corps, including future leader Mohandas Gandhi (middle row, fifth from left) WCL-E01-S2
SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013 WEST COUNTRY LIFE 21
Books Rosie Inge
Martin and Philippa Willey at the Levels RDA Carriage Driving centre in Butleigh with a copy of the group’s new book, Reflections of the Somerset Levels. Below, some of Stephen Harte’s pictures from the book
There should be an award for charities that operate beyond the pale. Away from the fat wallets and celebrity-studded auctions of London, need looms larger. In rural counties like Somerset, that greater need is not down to greater distances, or because the pain is more acute, but because funding and recognition are so much harder to come by. Compounding the problem are names that seldom roll off the tongue, like Save the Children or Cancer Research do. Somerset Levels Riding for the Disabled Carriage Driving Group (SLRDA) is an unwieldy monster of a title masking dedicated and improbable outreach to a group who, even post-Paralympics, lack public profile, empathy and support. Consider for a moment the broad swathe of disability that runs beneath our radar (often because it is below our sight-line): from accidents that have severed the spinal cords to anti-social conditions like Asperger’s or autism; wasting diseases like multiple sclerosis and the range of psychological problems such as depression which too often grow to permanence through neglect or mis-diagnos-
is. Now imagine the effect that friendly, positive, non-judgemental contact could have on such conditions, and how regular doses of Somerset ozone and scenery could lift the spirits in a bleak, often lonely, life. There is no denying the benefit, or the actual and potential numbers of SLRDA’s clientele; the problems reside in the high fixed costs of anything to do with horses and the challenge of competing for funds in a county which the Government largely ignores. How do you to break the pattern of hand-to-mouth fundraising that has, just about, sustained SLRDA since its inception? Early in 2013, three people sat down and thought big – far beyond the coffee mornings and open days of conventional, rural fundraising. Philippa and Martin Willey were founder members of the charity and knew every client well. Stephen Harte was a friend, a wellknown former architect who had developed a second career as a successful artist in watercolours. They would challenge their volunteers and clients to tell their stories, their
22 WEST COUNTRY LIFE SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013
motivation or experience of the charity; Stephen would illustrate what he saw or read, and the Willeys would edit and produce the results as a limited-edition book for as wide a sale as they could stimulate. Ever since Calendar Girls, there has been a market for left-of-field effort in a good local cause, but Reflections from the Somerset Levels is not in the mainstream of tribute or imitation. Instead of coy photographic titillation, there is the vastness of the Levels conveyed in a bold swash of Impressionist colour; details of tack, stabling and mucking-out interspersed with free-flowing sequences of horse, carriage and driver. Harte’s water colours drip understanding of a subject a world away from the strict draughtsmanship of the architect’s office. There is a surprising level of detail in his stilllives, but it is in the evocation of movement that his brush excels: two horses rolling on their backs in a spontaneous release of energy unconfined; the heads of horse and rider in perfect alignment, anticipating a sharp turn; the painstaking loading of a wheelchair; the high-stepping trot of a well-schooled horse. The foreword by eight-times Champion Jockey Peter Scudamore introduces a text of unabashed amateur enthusiasm. These are not writers but people born to put horse to carriage, or who have learned to love the effort and experience. Small wonder that grammar is an occasional casualty and exclamationmarks sometimes outnumber full stops. Julia, cursed with chronic rheumatoid arthritis since infancy, writes that she began with RDA dressage competition before trying her hand at driving. “I was not disappointed! I made enquiries and went along… I was made welcome and soon felt at home with drivers, helpers and ponies. After a while I was asked to drive Popcorn, a handsome grey pony, at the Windsor Horse Show! Well…we won the class and
came second in the cones section (we went too fast to win!). And we won two years after that! The bug had well and truly bitten!” Gill writes of her son: “Paul has Asperger’s and used to ride an RDA pony but became too big, and when Gram (his grandmother) heard about the carriage driving we went along around seven years ago. “He has become a good driver and won a class at the Windsor Horse Show in May, 2012. Paul met the Duke of Edinburgh who was very funny… Gram came in her wheelchair and watched as Paul was second in one class and first in the other.” When she died “one of his proudest moments was when he was able to drive the carriage with his sister on board behind Gram’s hearse.” These few quotes give a flavour, no more, of the passion that oozes from every page of this compelling book. I loved the stories but I loved the illustrations even more, and that is why I reached in my pocket and urge you to do the same. Writ large and small, on every page, is a connection between subject and artist: a talented man, understanding the difference his art could make. Sales of book from the SLRDA website www.somersetlevelsrda.org. The book will also be on sale in various outlets in Wells and Glastonbury, priced £10.
Reflections from the Somerset Levels by The Somerset Levels RDA Carriage Driving Group, priced £10
Books Sophie Herdman
The telephone rings and a man picks up – this is clearly not Joan Collins. In fact, it’s Percy Gibson. Husband number five. He passes her the phone. “I’m getting a bit of a sore throat so forgive me for being a little croaky,” she says. As ever, Collins is extremely busy, and she’s been struggling to sleep due to the building work going on at her London flat. “It’s hard to find a little nook that one can go into without bumping into someone,” she notes. Among her current projects, there’s a new autobiography Passion For Life, two films, a cameo in TV series Benidorm, a novel, a big secret project (you’d never guess this woman is 80) and she’s due to perform an updated version of her one-woman show next year, which Gibson directs. He is wonderful to work with, she says. And according to her new autobiography (or illustrated memoir, as she’d rather call it), he’s also a wonderful husband. So what does Collins, with her wealth of experience, believe is the key to a happy marriage? “Giving each other space and being best friends,” she states. “Oh – and trying to have separate bathrooms.” Collins is not really one for giving advice, though, and she certainly does not tell her three children how to conduct their relationships. “If someone asks what I think of their boyfriend, I will say, but I don’t arbitrarily go about giving advice. I hate people who do that,” she says. When she wants advice, she turns to her husband, and occasionally her younger sister, writer Jackie Collins – but only “up to a point”. Family is clearly very important to her. The first chapter of Passion For Life is dedicated to the topic (there’s another about her many friends – loyalty, she says, is key to a good friendship). Collins’ mother was a dance teacher, her father an agent for the likes of Shirley Bassey and The Beatles – though she describes him as unemotional. “He wanted me to go to secretarial school, find a good husband, have children and lead a nice, proper life. It wasn’t quite my cup of tea,” she says wryly. He told her she’d be washed up by 23 if she became an actress. “That was rather prevalent then – there was a tremendous amount of ageism with actresses, and I think there still is.” His comments just made her more determined to succeed. “I took some small pleasure in showing him that it didn’t happen the way he thought it would – that I was able to make a living as an actress, which very few actors can do all their life, and write books and support three children,” she says. “I feel I’ve achieved quite an amount in my time.” Her father did give her one good piece of advice, though: No one will ever do anything for you, you have to do it yourself. “He was right there,” she says. “I trusted my financial affairs to people who were supposed to be experts during the time of Dynasty, and they badly let me down. I found myself in very deep trouble with the tax man.” That’s not the only knock-back the actress has experienced during her life. There were four failed marriages, of course, starting with Irish actor Maxwell Reed (whom she married aged 19; it lasted four years), followed by another actor, Anthony Newley, who was unfaithful. Next came American
businessman Ron Kass, who developed a drug addiction, and finally pop singer and playboy Peter Holm, whom she describes in her book as “a mixture of obdurate dullard and calculating sociopath”. This was the shortest marriage, lasting barely two years. Collins also suffered heartache when her daughter Katyana, then aged eight, developed a severe brain trauma and was left fighting for her life in a coma following a car accident. Thankfully, she lived to tell the tale. The actress was once also embroiled in a high-profile legal battle with publishers Random House. Somehow, though, she seems to have remained positive. “I was born with the optimist gene,” she says. High points have been plentiful. She started working professionally in her teens and was quickly signed to Twentieth Century Fox, landing her big Hollywood break with a role in 1955’s Land Of The Pharaohs. Film and TV roles continued throughout the Fifties, Sixties and Seventies, including two films based on novels by her sister – The Stud and The Bitch. From 1981 to 1989, she starred as scheming diva Alexis in Dynasty, which became one of America’s most successful series and earned Collins a Golden Globe. She’s continued working in film and on stage, written a number of books, both fiction and non-fiction, and right now, of course, she’s popping up in Snickers adverts. In 1997, Collins was appointed OBE for her contribution to the arts and charity work. She’s a big fan of the Queen. She said: “She’s the most inspirational woman – becoming queen at the age of 25, she’s never put a foot wrong. She’s absolutely brilliant.” Margaret Thatcher’s another woman she admires. She said: “I like women who have a strong sense of their own identity, who don’t necessarily conform to a standard.” Her first four marriages may not have lasted, but Collins doesn’t see them (well, two of them at least) as complete failures. Without them, she wouldn’t have had her three children – Tara and Alexander, whom she had with Newley, and Katyana, by Kass. She’s looking forward to spending Christmas with them. “Every year, I have a massive tree. I started making my own decorations when the children were small – they’re almost antiques now – so we decorate the tree and the living room,” she says. Her three grandchildren will be there, too. “I enjoy my grandchildren, but do I enjoy being a grandmother? What does that mean? Sitting around making woollen hats for them?” she says, laughing. Indeed, it’s hard to imagine an 80-year-old, who can still do the splits and effortlessly pull off a bodycon dress, doing anything traditionally ‘granny-ish’. “There’s far too much emphasis on age these days,” she states. “It’s becoming ludicrous – everyone’s obsessed with everybody else. I don’t think one should be defined by age.There are people of 50 who look like crones and people of 70 who look brilliant.” Collins has no plans to slow down. “I don’t think I’ll ever do that. I’d be bored stiff. I can’t think of anything more horrendous than getting up and the only thing I have to look forward to is watching TV. No, I’ll always be doing something,” she says. “You know what they say: ‘You’ve got to eat life, or life will eat you’.”
Joan Collins and her daughter, Katyana, five, in 1977, above: Joan in 1963 with husband Anthony Newley at the El Morocco nightclub in New York, after they were married earlier in the day
Passion For Life by Joan Collins is published by Constable, priced £25
SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013 WEST COUNTRY LIFE 23
Travel Hannah Stephenson
Breaking off the beautiful, fragile coral, his flippers create a cloud of debris which muddies the water. Arnie doesn’t even look up at the divers observing his wanton destruction of the reef that everyone else is trying to save. We have just been given a lesson in the dive school on the importance of not touching the coral which provides a vital framework to the eco-balance of this part of the Indian Ocean, yet Arnie gives us a perfect display 10ft down of how not to treat this stunning underwater environment. But then Arnie is a hawksbill turtle, the largest of a group of around eight to make their home on the 300m-long house reef at Baros, a tiny, truly beautiful Robinson Crusoelike island in the Maldives, with five-star facilities and diving to die for. Arnie was simply foraging for food. It’s 40 years since Baros was created, firstly as a hang-out for divers, and later transformed into the high-end luxury paradise it is now, with authentically styled Maldivian bungalows featuring all mod cons and 24-hour butler service. The resort also benefits from its own separate sandbank island, on which you can enjoy a sunrise breakfast, and its own dhoni (a traditional Maldivian boat), on which you can sip Champagne as you watch the sun set. As the third oldest resort in the Maldives, Baros has seen much competition spring up in the last four decades. There are now a reported 102 resort islands in this heavenly hotspot south of India and west of Sri Lanka, and I’m told at least another 20 resorts are in the pipeline. This might seem a drop in the ocean for a territory comprising around 1,190 coral islands forming 26 atolls, the regions of the country, but how much damage is tourism doing? Before guilt sets in, we need to look at the bigger picture. Global warming produces the biggest threat to coral reefs and the Maldives in general, as rising sea levels threaten to engulf the islands, given that the Maldives’ highest natural point is just 2.4m. Yet tourism has, in some ways, helped to preserve much of the marine life which once went unprotected.
Dutchman Ronny Van Dorp, owner of the Baros dive centre, says that in the 17 years he has been there, he has seen shark numbers dip – fisherman would hunt them for shark fin soup, an extravagant delicacy in China – and rise again, following a total ban on shark hunting a few years ago. Now, we see harmless blacktip reef sharks and nurse sharks in the shallows, as well as on the reef. There’s also a ban on the catching of turtles and the sale or export of turtle-shell products, although strangely no ban on the lifting of turtle eggs, which apparently some of the locals like to eat. He says that the increase in tourism hasn’t made the reefs busier, because as numbers have risen, so have the number of resort islands – and divers have simply spread out across a wider area. Diving into those crystal clear waters I witness an aquarium on the house reef, as bicoloured parrotfish mingle with emperor angelfish, stripy Oriental sweetlips share space with jutting-jawed spotted wrasse and bright orange clownfish, indigenous to the Maldives, dip in and out of the flowering corals. Making tourists more eco-aware is all about education, says Ronny. “Diving is stricter now. It’s not irresponsible. We give clear instructions so everyone knows what to do, not to try to touch the fish or coral. We dive in small groups, but some islands may have 10 divers in a group and they are likely to affect the reefs more. Some islands have good reefs, some have bad ones.” Set up in 1979 as one of the first dive centres in the Maldives, Baros was also the first in the Maldives to practise the international Reef Check Programme, educating the public, monitoring reef health and working on solutions to protect healthy reefs and rehabilitate damaged ones. It is now a Padi 5-star Gold Palm Dive Centre. Coral reefs act like a protective seawall for the Maldives, providing breeding and feeding grounds for fish and other marine creatures, but also give us a picture of the health of the sea in general.
Maldivian anemonefish swim among the coral in the Maldives
Travel news Don’t skimp on ski insurance Heavy early snow in the Alps, the inspiration of the 2014 Winter Olympics, a hopeful economy – things are certainly aligning for a bumper ski season this year. Indeed, official figures are already showing the number of holidaymakers planning a trip to the slopes is 5 per cent higher than in 2012/13. But underneath all this good news, lies something a little more worrying. According to research by the Association of British Travel Agents (ABTA), over a third (36 per cent) of Brits taking a winter sports holiday will not bother to purchase specific winter sports insurance. The number jumps to nearly half (47 per cent) with under 35s, the age group keenest on winter sports breaks. Without adequate insurance, skiers and snowboarders risk sky-high medical bills after an accident or injury; treating and bringing a skier back home with a broken leg from
Europe can easily see bills topping £6,000, and possibly 50,000 dollars (£30,500) from the US and Canada. Care in the US health system costs around £1,250 per day. On top of all this, failure to insure means many skiers may also put hundreds of pounds in deposits at risk, if they scrap planned holidays at the last minute. The trend of scrimping on insurance – or ignoring it altogether – is not exclusive to skiers though, it goes right across the travel industry. Earlier this year, ABTA warned earlier that nearly half of 15-24 year olds travel overseas with no cover in place. Peter Hayman, director of specialist travel insurance broker P J Hayman, says the current ease of booking a holiday doesn’t help, “It’s easy nowadays to catch easyJet flights to the slopes, and insurance gets left out of the booking process. And our figures suggest claims are twice as likely from a ski trip as a holiday in the sun though.”
24 WEST COUNTRY LIFE SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013
Return to classical Egypt
Ski accidents are common, but many aren’t insured
Classical Egypt is back on the map for British travellers, following an easing of advice from the Foreign and Commonwealth Office (FCO), who now, once again, permit travel to Cairo, though restrictions do remain on travel along the Nile Valley between Cairo and Luxor. Already, Egyptair has confirmed that weekly, direct scheduled flights ex-Heathrow to Luxor will resume on February 17, with operator Discover Egypt reinstating this service for Nile Cruises and twin centre stays. Philip Breckner of Discover Egypt says: “While it will take time to rebuild confidence, we’ve finalised arrangements for many who have waited for the FCO advice to be lifted.” Seven-night Nile cruises in December with Discover Egypt start at £799 on the five-star Viking Princess, including Egyptair flights ex-Heathrow and Manchester, transfers and full board cruise with 10 guided excursions WCL-E01-S2
Baros offers reef watch courses, in which tourists can help gather data through fish and coral identification, which will be collated and sent to the Reef Check database, as well as manta ray information which is sent to Male, the capital, to assess numbers (mantas are another protected species) and migration patter ns. Some 15 years ago, the El Nino effect – when the temperature of the waters in the Maldives rose above 32C for around two weeks – caused extensive coral bleaching, killing a lot of coral. In response, resorts set up their own coral planting initiatives for regeneration. Baros is among those to offer guests the chance to regenerate the coral, with the help of its experts. In a classroom, marine biologist Verena Wiesbauer-Ali teaches us about the importance of coral in the eco-cycle and how colonies of coral grow poorly on sand, so need moving to grow more successfully. We go out snorkelling in a small group, are shown how to dive down to select the coral for regeneration, choosing bits of coral which have been broken off or are growing poorly but are not completely dead, which are suitable for planting. Wide metal frames, which look like elaborate plant supports, are placed underwater in the shallows while each of us takes what looks like a plastic cable tie and attaches the piece of coral to the frame, repeating the process until it’s full. Each piece is given room to grow and within months you can see the difference. Baros is now offering a donation system, whereby you can sponsor a coral planting frame and the resort will send you an update and picture of its progress as time goes on. As tourism has increased, so have concerns about the rubbish problem, not helped by reports that Thilafushi, known as “Rubbish Island” and purpose-built to be used as a garbage dump by many of the luxury hotels, is full to overflowing. There’s talk of building an underground incinerator to alleviate the problem, but time will tell. Meanwhile, the marine biologists at Baros are doing everything in their power to get the conservation message across to tourists. “Tourism is a hope for the Maldives, not a danger,” says Verena. “I can show you what is alive and what is dead. It gives people the chance to learn how fragile our coral is and how important it is. I’m thrilled to see a turtle every day. If the tourists weren’t here, these animals wouldn’t be protected.”
Travel facts Hannah Stephenson travelled to Male courtesy of Sovereign Luxury Travel. A week at the five-star Baros Maldives costs from £1,599 per person – saving up to £662 – booked through Sovereign Luxury Travel (0843 770 4526, www.sovereign.com). The price includes a free night, return flights from London Gatwick with Emirates, airport lounge access, private transfers and seven nights B&B in a Deluxe Villa, based on two adults sharing a room. Prices based on departures May 2, 2014. For further information, visit www.Baros.com
start from £999 on the five-star Royal Viking. A second week, all-inclusive in a hotel in Luxor starts from £149 or from £299 on the Red Sea Riviera. Visits to Cairo and The Pyramids costs an extra £60 per person. Adventure travel experts Explore has also reopened bookings on ten tours of Egypt in 2014, with eight revised itineraries and two unchanged itineraries for groups and families to see Aswan, Luxor and the Red Sea region. The programme avoids the Nile Valley by replacing an overnight train journey with an evening Cairo-Aswan flight. Ashley Toft, Explore managing director says: “Like the FCO, we are confident that areas of Egypt are safe again for travellers. “From exploring the famous Pyramids, to riding camels through the desert, snorkelling in the Red Sea, visiting ancient temples and cruising the Nile, there is so much to enjoy.” ■ Visit www.discoveregypt.co.uk and www.explore.co.uk
Find the best value ski holidays
Many trips to Egypt are now being offered again
Penny-pinching skiers should head to eastern Europe, Italy and Austria this year, according to a new report on best value ski resorts. The latest Post Office Travel Money Ski Resort Report, produced with leading operator Crystal Ski Holidays, compared prices for ski equipment, lift passes, ski school, meals and drinks in 30 ski resorts (22 in Europe, eight in North America) and found Bansko in Bulgaria and Kranjska Gora in Slovenia were the cheapest holidays, around £274 and £326 respectively, but Italy’s Livigno came in at a bargain-friendly third place (£351) and Austria’s Ellmau (£368) settled at fourth. Prices are rising fastest in Soldeu (Andorra), now up 14 per cent from last season to £432, with Courchevel (France) up 13 per cent to £600. Across the pond though, it’s another story, and prices are down around 20 per cent in both Tremblant (Canada) and Winter Park (USA). WCL-E01-S2
West End treat Superbreak (0871 700 4384) offers two night’s B&B at four-star Park Plaza riverbank Hotel, with top-priced tickets for smash hit Jersey Boys show for £160, throughout December and January. Hotel perfectly placed to see London Eye, Westminster Abbey and Tate Britain, all a short walk away.
Christmas in Cornwall Cornish Cottages (01326 240333) offers seven nights’ self-catering from Dec 21 in Trevalza, a recently renovated 18th-century detached Cornish cob cottage sleeping six in three bedrooms, with open fireplace and beamed ceilings, for total £599, saving £116, about a mile from the village of St Keverne.
EasyJet to Disneyland easyJet.com/holidays (0843 104 1000) offers two-night breaks from £156, incl flights exBristol Feb 10, two nights accommodation and park tickets. Flights also avail ex-Luton, Gatwick, Bristol, Liverpool, Edinburgh, Belfast & Glasgow, with two nights ex-Liverpool Feb 12 from £195 and ex-Luton Jan 19 from £227. Transfers and baggage cost extra, and some payment methods attract a handling fee.
New year & Northern lights in Sweden Simply Northern Lights (01427 700 115) offers a five-night new year getaway to Bjorkliden and Lulea from £1,250, saving over £200. Departing Dec 29, package incl three nights’ half-board in Björkliden, two nights’ B&B in Lulea, transfers and flights from London with SAS. Package incl three nights in cosy chalet for amazing views of the Northern Lights, husky sledding or snowmobile tour before celebrating new year with dinner and live music.
Coaching through Europe Shearings (0844 209 7143) offers Christmas break in Lake Bled from £349, with four nights’ half-board at Hotel Jelovica, excursion to Lake Bled Castle, Christmas lunch with entertainment, and Slovenian folklore evening, with return overnight coach travel departing Dec 22.
Short-haul sun Thomas Cook (0844 412 5970) offers seven nights’ self-catering at four-star Four Views Baiai, Funchal, Madeira from £245, based on three adults sharing and flights exManchester Dec 16; seven nights’ all-incl at four-star Sentido Gold Island in Alanya, Turkey, from £535 (three adults sharing) exGatwick Dec 22.
Concert in Vegas Bon Voyage (0800 316 0194) offers four-night package to see Bruno Mars or the Eagles in concert in Las Vegas for £1059, with return flights ex-Gatwick Feb 13 or 14, champagne limo transfers on arrival, deluxe room at the five-star Caesar’s Palace Hotel.
Sri Lanka Hayes & Jarvis (01293 735831) offers seven nights’ all-incl at three-star Mermaid Hotel & Club, incl transfers and return Emirates flights ex-Gatwick Jan 9 from £849, saving £200, and incl transfers.
SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013 WEST COUNTRY LIFE 25
Walks Sue Gearing
Crofton, Wiltshire. Follow the tow path up the flight of locks on the Kennet and Avon Canal at Crofton to the East of Marlborough on this beautiful circle of contrasts in Wiltshire starting at the pumping station of the Crofton Beam Engine. Then go along the peaceful canal, with fishermen and slow moving longboats for company. Circle round through a quintessential English parkland of Tottenham Park which has an uncertain future at present. Then pass a 19thcentury church in the parkland. There is one section of about 15 minutes on a road but the rest is along the towpath and on good paths and tracks. After much rain there may well be sections of mud and stickiness. Some of the stiles are broken particularly in the park and some not ideal for less agile dogs. Come back after Easter and take time to enjoy the Crofton Steam Shed. Real steam enthusiasts should come on the special steam days.
Start Turn right from the car park and follow the lane for about one fifth of a mile, crossing the railway and reaching Freewarren Bridge over the canal.
1 Canal Cross the bridge and turn right down alongside the canal by one of the locks part of the Crofton flight. The nine locks achieve a total rise/fall of 61ft and were built under the supervision of engineer John Rennie. Water is pumped to the summit at the western end of the locks by the restored Crofton Pumping Station. On this walk we follow half of the flight at the beginning and the rest at the end. Continue up the towpath which should be quite dry and pass more locks. Also pass the brick supports of the old railway which used to cross the canal at this point. After about another mile, having passed under one bridge, come to the start of the Bruce Tunnel on the summit pound of the canal.
2 Tunnel This is the only tunnel on the canal and it is 502 yards long and named after Thomas Brudenell-Bruce, 1st Earl of Ailesbury the local landowner, who, when the canal was being built, would not allow a deep cutting through his land, and insisted on a tunnel instead. At the opening of the tunnel, there is a plaque commemorating its construction between 1806 and 1809. When canal boats were still pulled by horses, the boatmen had to haul boats through the tunnel by hand, pulling on chains that ran along the inside walls. As there is no towpath through the tunnel, you have to go up the path and along the top before dropping down to the other side of the tunnel and come out by a house on to the Savernake Road, with the impressive former Savernake Forest Hotel ahead. This fine Victorian brick hotel was purpose-built by the Marquis of Ailesbury in about 1864 to serve the newly built Savernake station on the Berks & Hants Extension Railway. The line connected Hungerford with Devizes and so left Berkshire for Wiltshire after about two miles and never went anywhere near Hampshire. (For an interesting history of the hotel it is worth looking at the website – just Google ‘Savernake Forest Hotel’). Turn right on the quiet road over a disused railway. Cross the railway and then the disused extension railway and follow the road uphill and then down for about 12-15 minutes to the hamlet of Durley with its ornate brickwork estate houses. Just past the phone box, turn right on the footpath signed to St Katharine’s Church into Tottenham Park.
3 Tottenham Park This estate was all part of the vast forest of Savernake. Tottenham Park has glorious gardens and landscaped parkland with extensive
rides which between 1764 and 1770 were improved and developed by Lancelot “Capability” Brown. Cross a stile and go ahead through the parkland to a large copse of trees. Cross a stile to enter the woodland and go through. Then cross a drive, the Column Ride named after the tall column you can see along the ride to your left. On the right is a good view of Tottenham House. The house, which has more than one hundred rooms belongs to the Trustees of Savernake Estate. Most of the present building, built for the 1st Marquess of Ailesbury, dates from the 1820s. The Ailesbury family lived there – sharing it in the last war with the US Army – until moving out in 1946. It was a prep school until 1994 and after that was leased for ten years to a charity helping unemployed troubled young people, but the work ended due to cuts in government support. David Brudenell-Bruce, Earl of Cardigan (owns 49 per cent and his son Thomas James Brudenell-Bruce, Viscount Savernake owns 51 per cent. Go on and through more woodland and then over a stile and on in the same direction through more open parkland. Reach another clump of trees. The path and stiles through it were in bad condition when I came and most walkers seem to have gone around the righthand side. Then maintain direction across to a great brake of woodland which you access over a broken stile. Keep straight on through and then on up a band of woodland ahead.
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4 Church Eventually reach the flint church of St Katharine’s, Savernake, consecrated in 1861 as a chapel of ease to the mother church of Great Bedwyn. It was dedicated to St Katharine by Maria Caroline, Marchioness of Ailesbury in memory of her Russian mother, Katharine Woronzoff, Dowager Countess of Pembroke. Sadly, the stained glass windows were destroyed by a an accidental explosion at a nearby ammunitions store at the end of the last war. Continue on past the church through woodland and, later, as it opens out on the right, get sweeping views again across the park. Continue until you pass an estate cottage on your left and then carry on, climbing gently.
house on your left, take the track on the right. A larger track joins. Just continue on and go through a stony clearing. Keep straight on ignoring side tracks through an area which may be muddy after rain.
6 Field Reach a hunting gate into a field ahead. Follow the right edge. At the end come on to a track and turn left. This leads down to Crofton Farm and the lane in Crofton. Ahead is the chimney of the pumping station. At the lane, turn left into the hamlet of Crofton and at the bend go round to the right.
7 Level crossing
5 Track junction Reach another estate house at a junction of tracks with Stoke Manor ahead, although invisible at this point. Take the track on the right still in woodland. Soon the track divides – take the left fork passing paddocks and a house on the right. Approach a fence and houses, and turn right on the main track. It soon bends left through mainly beech woodland. Reach a beautiful thatched house on the left. Continue ahead on a smaller path downhill where it may be muddy in parts. At the end of the garden of the thatched
Go over the level crossing and then over the canal. Turn right on the towpath and start the ascent of the flight of locks. Pass a canal information board. Opposite the wpumping station come alongside Wilton Water and pass a footpath which leads uphill to Wilton windmill – a five-floor brick tower mill. But you continue along the canal all the way to Freewarren Bridge. Go up and over the bridge and retrace your steps back to the pumping station car park.
Crofton Pumping Station, 01672 870300
Walks Martin Hesp
You need a lot of dosh to buy just a shed here in East Portlemouth. And even the normally reasonable National Trust charges a whopping £7.50 to park in its local property. Actually, the sign asks for £750, which might be taking the phrase Millionaire’s Row a bit too far. However, the parish of East Portlemouth does offer some of the finest coastal walking in the West Country – a fact which is undoubtedly linked to those high property prices. Its fabulous frontage on the Salcombe estuary is enough to rave about alone – but when you hike around the corner to explore the wondrous coast that stretches south-east towards Prawle Point. Sweeping views, wild heaths, dramatic cliffs, beautiful beaches, hidden coves and general scenic remoteness… What’s not to like? And not a single building imposes along the whole eight-mile length of this wondrous lot – except for one. It’s called Gara Rock and it used to be a well known hotel – now, though, it has been redeveloped to become a complex of luxury apartments and cottages – some of which are for sale and some for rent. There’s also a restaurant which must have one of the best maritime views of any dining establishment in the UK. So imagine my reaction when the Dartmoor-based company called Helpful Holidays asked if I’d like to spend the weekend in one of the Gara Rock apartments it rents out. I did just that and enjoyed a couple of truly fabulous hikes along the amazing coast – starting with this one in bright winter sunshine. However, because Gara Rock is difficult to drive to – and because most readers are a lot more likely to visit Salcombe than they are the lonely littoral between Portlemouth and Prawle with its truly tortuous lanes – I’ve written up the walk as a circular route starting and ending in the busy seaside town. The great thing about doing the walk this way around is that you can call in at the Gara Rock restaurant for refreshment at the halfway – and also that you get a couple of ferry rides thrown in for good measure. Even on winter days there will be a ferry every half hour to take you across the fjord or riverless estuary, otherwise known as Salcombe Harbour, and deposit you in the parish of East Portlemouth. Just above the ferry landing on the far side, a lane weaves its way seawards above the posh shoreline properties to Mill Bay, which must be one of the most pleasant coves within a few hundred yards of any town anywhere. This by the way is the place where you can park for £7.50. But we were walking – and without more ado we were off through the woods and heading for Biddlehead Point where yet another pleasant bay was revealed to us. It’s called Sunny Cove, which was apt it was bathed in golden light the day we passed by. Now we were on the winding path over Rickham Common, and climbing around to Limebury Point where the sun blazed down on the great cliffs of Bolt Head across the other side of The Bar. There used to be a Second World War aerodrome above the fearsome cliffs, and local historian Malcolm Darch told me how he’d once obtained a written account from an airman who was on holiday from his duties during those worrying years when Britain was under siege. The pilot was enjoying the same walk as us when he saw a Lancaster bomber coming out over the cliffs from the airfield. He told Mr Darch it was one of the most terrifying things he’d ever seen: the big plane didn’t have
enough runway so that it came over the cliff edge with its four engines screaming and loosing height as it tried to clear the sea. It made it – just – but the airman did not envy the chaps inside. Up and down goes the trail along the side of Portlemouth Down, in true coast-path rollercoaster tradition. And also typical of Britain’s longest continuous path are the views. They are splendid – at first as you look over your shoulder towards Bolt Head – and then in front of you as the coast stretches south east toward Prawle Point. It’s a jagged bit of England with a series of wonderful names to conjure with: Rudder Cove, Abraham’s Hole, Pig’s Nose and Gammon Head. Eventually we reached the small thatched lookout tower which, looking a bit like a sailless Greek windmill, protrudes from the Gara Rock itself – and is a few yards away from the new complex’s big circular restaurant with its wall-to-wall panoramic windows. But before you pop in for refreshment, I’d suggest following the coast path onward on a little addition to this walk. The trail descends from Gara Rock to a wonderful beach, marked on the OS map as Abraham’s Hole, but known locally as Rickham Sands. This has got to be one of the loveliest beaches in Devon, so well worth the steep descent and eventual ascent. The hillside above is particularly interesting because you will see how it is riddled with ancient field systems. Some are so old they’re thought to date back to the Bronze Age – I’m told you can also see traces of a later Iron Age settlement up in the crags. When you’ve had enough of the beach, retrace your steps back up to the new Gara Rock. The place was originally an observation post (complete with a terrace of cottages) built sometime in the 1840s as the Rickham Coastguard Station – well positioned to observe and warn of external threat, with a vantage point which permitted a clear view of both Salcombe Harbour and the coast up to Prawle Point. In 1909 the place was sold into private hands, turned into holiday accommodation – and by 1936 the “Gara Rock En Pension” was advertised as having many outstanding facilities for the time. It received celebrity visitors such as Maragret Rutherford, Sir Laurence Olivier and Sir John Betjeman. The old hotel became rather tired looking in its dotage and was demolished in 2006 to make way for the new complex where I was lucky enough to stay – and where you can too if you contact Helpful Holidays. The new restaurant does special discounts for groups of walkers – and also has a unique “workbench” system where for various prices you can help yourself to things like soup and bread and salads. Replete walkers have a choice of routes when returning to the ferry at East Portlemouth. There’s a “middle” track which takes you around the edge of the field high above the coast path, to eventually descend through the woods to Mill Bay – or there’s a quicker route down the Rickham Valley, which ends up at the same place. Either will do – and both help complete what in my opinion is one of the best short, circular, coastal walks in the country.
From the top, the ancient field systems near Gara Rock, South Devon – some are so old they’re thought to date back to the Bronze Age; the Salcombe ferry; the original coastguard lookout tower
SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013 WEST COUNTRY LIFE 29
Gardening Alan Down
With just a few shopping days left until Christmas Day, I have some gift ideas for those who are into their gardening. Fortunately, there are still places to shop where you won’t get your shins kicked or your toes stood on and come back to find that you have a parking ticket on the windscreen! Garden centres and retail nurseries are generally much calmer places than the shopping centre and there is an amazing array of original gifts on sale there too. There are masses of gardening books written every year but I want to single out one which is less about gardening and more about what you do with the end results. This is a cook book that puts local, seasonal and ethically sourced food first and it has won a bunch of accolades already. The Ethicurean Cookbook was launched in the Garden Museum in central London in May but this is a West Country book from a Wrington restaurant just over the hill from us here at Cleeve Nursery. It’s full of truly original and inspiring recipes. For wildlife lovers there is now no end of choice. Products made by the Tetbury-based Wildlife World company seem to cover everything. Mini cameras in bird nest boxes, bat, frog, toad, hedgehog homes and every specialised nest box that you could imagine are all there. Even the insects are not left out with plenty of choice of winter shelters and feeders too. Tools are always a popular gift and, judging by Monty Don’s garden shed, you can never have too many. But joking aside, there is something about good quality tools that makes even the most menial job a pleasure. A good pair of secateurs, such as those made by Felco, makes pruning a joy. There are plenty of other well-made secateurs on the market and even some cheap enough to be stocking fillers. A good digging spade and a fork are a must but for those with well-established flower borders the smaller border size would be a better choice. Of course, hand trowels and hand forks have that knack of disappearing. In our garden, the handles get chewed by our dog as soon as you turn your back, so we never get to wear them out. The award-winning Flexi-Spray hose-end watering gadget from Hozelock is a brilliant new gizmo and one that I have become very fond of. It is just so versatile and flexible, and does away with a plethora of other watering devices. And while we are on the subject of watering; the Haws range of watering cans just go on and on. Whether they are last-a-lifetime galvanised steel or made of strong plastic, these are made to last and even pass on to the next generation. For those with a greenhouse or conservatory, perhaps a propagator would be welcome? Orchids have become the number one indoor plant so an orchid product from Taunton-based Growth Technology will help to keep them blooming. These products are now becoming more widely available. Seeds make first-rate stocking
fillers as do plant labels and balls of string. If you are really stumped for ideas, but know that the recipient is in to gardening, then there are two easy solutions. The first is, of course, the National Garden Gift Voucher. This is widely available and widely accepted throughout the country. The second is to make the gift of membership of our premier garden society the Royal Horticultural Society. Membership gives exclusive benefits that include; one-to-one garden advice from RHS experts, free entry to the four RHS gardens (our local is Rosemoor, near Barnstaple, Devon), access to over 140 RHS recommended gardens (of which there are plenty in the West), discounted tickets or privileged access to RHS shows including Chelsea Flower Show. A subscription to a gardening magazine might go down well and be a lasting present. Gardeners World magazine has been voted the best gardening magazine but my favourite is the RHS The Garden monthly magazine. It has certainly improved beyond all measure in recent years and is full of inspiration and informative content. If you love to just wistfully look at others’ beautiful gardens then The English Garden is for you. But if you prefer to keep it local then the Country Gardener magazine with editions for Cotswolds, Somerset, Devon, Dorset and Hampshire is full of excellent articles and is very reasonably priced too.
Alan’s gardening tips for the weekend ■ Prune raspberries, blackberries, loganberries and other hybrid fruits (if you haven’t already done so). Cut out all old stems that bore fruit this year. Cut out any weak spindly shoots and tie in the strong new shoots that are left. Give them a good feed with sulphate of potash. ■ Blackcurrants, if they were not done in the summer, can be pruned. Cut old wood to ground level. Also keep a look out for any swollen buds which are infected with big bud mite and remove them as they can spread the disease Reversion Virus. ■ Prune apples and pears to improve their shape, encourage younger growth, remove disease and to control the amount of fruit bud they have. Don’t prune fan, espalier and cordon-trained trees as these should have been pruned in summer. Also, don’t prune plums, damsons and cherries now either since summer pruning is best for these. ■ Tie splaying branches of conifers in as any snow we get will only make matters worse. Old trees prone to this are better replaced with new improved varieties. ■ Cover your outside tap with an insulation cover. ■ Check that greenhouse heaters are working properly. ■ Move potted “prepared” hy-
30 WEST COUNTRY LIFE SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013
Gardens acinths into warmer rooms to gradually force them into flower in time for Christmas. If they are coming on too fast move them back into the cool again. ■ Plant up amaryllis (hippeastrum) bulbs inside. Use a soil-based compost and water very sparingly to start with. As flowers and leaves appear, give more water.
Alan’s Plant of the Week Hollies At the time of writing there are masses of holly berries on trees but that could change surprisingly quickly. The hedges and woods get stripped of berries and seeds by our native bird population and flocks of fieldfares and redwings from Northern Europe are now digging in too. However, hollies in towns tend to miss this feeding frenzy and can sometimes have berries still on the tree when the next season’s flowers are there too. Perhaps it’s the prevalence of cats that deter them? Not every holly will bear berries but some, such as “Alaska” and “J C van Tol”, are much more likely to produce them than others. Many varieties only produce male flowers so clearly these aren’t going to have berries. But just like the birds and the bees, it is necessary to have these males to pollinate the females. Now you don’t have to have both in your garden and pollinating insects will carry pollen from street to street. If you want to ensure that berries are produced you are best to plant one male tree and as many female varieties as takes your fancy. A few varieties, such as “J C van Tol”, are virtually hermaphrodite having both male and female flowers on the same tree. Consequently planting one of this variety overcomes this little problem. Until Christmas Cleeve has a special 30 per cent off hollies from our own nursery. These are plants 2-3ft-high grown in three-litre pots. The girls we have are green leaf “Alaska”, silver-variegated “Handsworth New Silver” and gold-variegated “Golden King”. The lucky boy is cool and suave-looking silver-variegated “Elegantissima”. And smooth green leaf “J C van Tol”? Well he or she is, as I said earlier, probably both (hermaphrodite)! And to get that 30 per cent off all you need to do is quote ILEX30 at the till. This is part of our celebration of 30 years in business.
Ask Alan Question I want to grow a mistletoe tree in my garden but I can’t find anyone selling one! Can you help? – From Mrs D Barrett
Mistletoe is a tree parasite and will not grow on its own. It needs to grow on a host tree such as an apple or poplar. Birds spread mistletoe by wiping the sticky berries off their beaks onto tree branches, leaving the seeds there to germinate. It takes three years or so for the mistletoe to be noticeable and another year or two before it’s big enough to harvest. Not all plants will produce berries since there are male and female plants. It is unlikely that you will be able to buy a tree with mistletoe already growing on it.
Alan will be back on January 4
Craig Tennock managing director of Cotswold Fir, says Christmas trees aren’t just for Christmas Christmas trees are as much a part of the festive season as turkey and mince pies. Yet their time in the spotlight is brief: put up a few weeks before Christmas and taken down by Twelfth Night. At Cotswold Fir, Christmas trees are more than just a passing interest and the whole year is spent getting them in tip-top condition for their starring role. The process starts thousands of miles away in Georgia where seedling trees are produced from seed by a specialist grower. “Every single one comes from there,” explains Craig Tennock, managing director of Cotswold Fir. “There have been variations on that but that’s the prime.” The firm takes in three-year-old seedlings and starts the long process of growing them on. At a 33-acre site at Primrose Vale in Shurdington, there are rows and rows of trees, some in the ground and others growing in pots, carefully trained against cords to keep them straight and with an automatic watering system in place. At the height of the season, with cut trees brought in from locations in Guildford and Edinburgh, there will be more than 10,000 trees on site. The smallest potted trees are about 2ft-high, while the biggest in 35L pots are more than 7ft. “These are something beautiful,” says Craig, pointing out a particularly magnificent specimen. The firm grows mainly Norway spruce and Nordmann fir and Craig explains that they offer very different characteristics. Norway spruce are fast-growing with the familiar “Christmas scent” and are easy to shape into the traditional shape. “You can shape them fairly simply by cutting them prior to going to market,” explains Craig. In contrast, Nordmann fir are slow-growing, with soft needles that are less likely to drop in a centrally heated home. The disadvantage for the grower is their susceptibility to disease, such as current season needle necrosis, and the fact they need more careful shaping. “They are more expensive to grow,” says Craig. In addition, Cotswold fir also grows some blue spruce and Noble fir, which has a blue tinge to the foliage. Given the time invested in each tree, secondguessing market trends several years into the future is an important part of the business. One development that Craig believes is going to grow is renting potted trees rather than buying them cut. “Rental Claus” is a service that Cotswold Fir has offered for the past five years and it’s gaining in popularity. Trees come in various sizes from 3ft to 7.5ft, with prices ranging from £15 to £35 plus a refundable deposit. The trees are rented out for three weeks and after Christmas go back into the field. “It’s up to us to have a product that survives,” he explains. “If they die, nobody is happy and we don’t want that.”
For more information, visit www.cotswoldfir.com Tips to keep your cut trees in top condition Use a base that holds water Re-cut the trunk before putting into the base Add some sugar to the water Place the tree away from heat, such as a radiator Check the water level regularly
For Good Advice & Excellent Home Grown Plants
Cleeve Nursery’s Alan Down can be contacted at the nursery on 01934 832134. If you would like to ask Alan Down a gardening question, visit www.cleevenursery.co.uk and click on the Ask Us A Question tab. Alan can only answer emailed questions. Visit Alan’s blog at cleevenursery.co.uk/blog You can also follow Alan on Twitter: @AlanEDown
visit your local nursery!
Pictures Holly is Alan’s plant of the week, maim image, but do watch out for those berry-pinching birds; from top, secateurs make an ideal gift; hyacinths can be kept in warmer rooms now; some fruit trees need to be pruned now; grown mistletoe with a host
138 Main Road, Cleeve, BS49 4PW 01934 832134 www.cleevenursery.co.uk WCL-E01-S2
SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013 WEST COUNTRY LIFE 31
Antiques The Holy Grail of Rolex Charterhouse The last Charterhouse auction of the year on Wednesday, December 18, includes a gentleman’s Rolex wristwatch estimated to sell for £10,000. “The December collector’s auction always has a fantastic mix of items, and with Christmas just around the corner, many lots are sold to bidders looking for something just that little bit extra special,” says Richard Bromell. “The auction of nearly 1,000 lots certainly contains a broad selection of pieces including diamond jewellery from £50 – £5,000, including Cartier, along with his and hers Rolex wristwatches, including the rare Submariner.” Possibly a present for the man who has everything, the Rolex Submariner going under the hammer at Charterhouse is rare due to the lettering on its dial. With the word Submariner in red capital letters, this particular series of Rolex was produced only for a few years from the late 1960s into the early 1970s. Now regarded as one of the Holy Grail watches for Rolex collectors, it is estimated at £8,000-£10,000. Viewing for the auction at Charterhouse, The Long Street Salerooms, Sherborne, DT9 3BS is on Monday 16, from 10am-6pm and Tuesday 17, from 10am-5pm. The auction catalogue can also be viewed and downloaded from its website www.charterhouse-auction.com Charterhouse is now accepting for its forthcoming programme of antiques auctions with pictures, books, Beswick and antiques in January closely followed by classic cars and motorcycles in February. For further information regarding these auctions, or to arrange a home visit, contact
Richard Bromell, Partner at Charterhouse, The Long Street Salerooms, Sherborne, Dorset, 01935 812277, or email firstname.lastname@example.org
Signs that market is buoyant Chippenham Lot 104, a Kingsford Beers and Ales Lacock Brewery advertising mirror was a good reflection of the results at The Chippenham Auction Rooms recent Enamel Signs, Toys and Collectors’ sale. Estimated at £100-£150 it came in at a magnificent £1,500 – a sign the advertising and collectors’ market remains buoyant. Items from breweries, old public houses and cigarette companies remained popular throughout the sale. An Isleworth Brewery Ales & Stout/ Wines and Spirits glass advertising sign made an unexpected £400, while a tobacco sign, a rare enamel sign advertising Mick McQuaid, boasting of “The Best Tobacco in the World” made a respectable £480, just over estimate. Cast-iron railway signs were also a surprise on the day with two examples, both valued under £100 coming in at £240 each. A very special replica steam engine that had been built from scratch took over the centre of the room. The Burrell traction engine carried a guide of £5,000 and did not disappoint when it sold for exactly that. A pedal car, modelled in the form of a vintage car that was also expertly made, was sold for £420 and will delight anybody of any age who finds it underneath their Christmas tree.
Final sale to charm collectors The Chippenham Auction Rooms has its final auction of the year on Saturday and, as all antiques and collectables have been in 2013, it is not one to miss. Gold and silver are once again represented with the pick being a fabulous 19th-century silver chalice as well as three charm bracelets, with between 12 and 20 different decorations on each. For those looking for that special Christmas gift, an auction might well be a good alternative to the bustling high street and online market place. Where else would you find a great collection of glass decanters stood next to a large Edwardian dapple grey rocking horse? There will also be 00 and 0 gauge train sets to snap up, ideal for the railway collector. Or perhaps something a little more unusual and ornate might be the perfect gift and in that case look no further than the Tunbridge ware sewing box. Beautifully decorated this has been valued at £200-£300. The Chippenham Auction Rooms will open their doors again in January with some changes to sale days. Auctions will now be split into two with the silver and jewellery being sold on the same day as viewing, Fridays, and the antiques and collectables will be sold as per usual on the Saturday. The first sale of 2014 will be on January 24 and 25. For more information, contact Chippenham Auction Rooms on 01249 444544 or visit www.chippenhamauctionrooms.co.uk
W H Smith sells for £28,000 Chorley’s A Victorian Christmas feeling was certainly present at Chorley’s Prinknash salerooms on November 28. Late 19th and early 20th-century dolls, toys, games and puzzles reached unbelievable prices. The majority had been in the ownership of a single collector, who built up the collection over the past 60 years. It wasn’t long before the saleroom fell silent as bids for a dolls’ house settee and three chairs made out of tin by the English firm Evans & Cartwright topped £3,000, despite their damaged condition. A suite of simulated dolls’ house furniture raced to £450 and a tiny portrait of a lady realised £400. The collection of bisque head and other dolls also achieved satisfactory results; a leather-bodied, bisque-head doll by Simon and Halbig lead the way at £750 but this was eclipsed by a pink teddy ... the Chad Valley Growler which sold for £1,600. A remarkable collection of tinplate toys in almost mint condition provided many sur-
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Main image, right, the portrait of William Henry Smith II sold for £28,000 at Chorley’s; from the top, the rare Rolex Submariner Red, being sold by Charterhouse next week, valued from £8,000 to £10,000; this Lehmann clockwork motorbike sold for £850; a painted and decorated Noah’s Ark, with Mr and Mrs Noah and a large quantity of animals, sold for £500; one of the brewery signs that sold well at Chippenham
prises; clockwork insects and animals in most cases exceeded their pre-sale estimates. A clockwork motorbike “The Echo” raced away and more than doubled its estimate selling for £850. A fascinating tinplate clockwork aeroplane, Bleriot’s monoplane, flew away at £800, doubling its estimate. Among other toys in this outstanding collection was a German Noah’s Ark, with both Mr and Mrs Noah and a large quantity of animals, most of which were damaged, which still realised £500; and the final lot, a much-loved rocking horse made in Gloucester sold for £650. The collection included some charming 19th-century children’s books. Several Kate Greenway Almanacks, always popular, achieved £320 and a collection of tiny books from The Infant’s Library realised £420. Some viewers at Chorley’s saleroom pondered a possible connection with another lot in the auction: might such books have been once available on a W H Smith bookstall in London? William Henry Smith II opened the first of many bookstalls on Euston Station in 1848. A portrait of the grandson of the founder of W H Smith & Sons was pride of place in the saleroom on day two of Chorley’s November sale. With documented provenance, such an important historical subject attracted great interest and the half-length portrait by the celebrated Victorian artist George Richmond was sold, after a battle between room and telephone bidders, for £28,000.
Taste of success for tea service Greenslade Taylor Hunt The final monthly sale of the year at Greenslade Taylor Hunt’s Taunton auction rooms on Thursday December 5 served up a fine selection of strong prices across the board. Top billing went to a late 19th-century Russian silver four-piece tea and coffee service with associated tray that achieved £2,600. This attracted plenty of interest – with three phone bidders among those vying for ownership of the service. A magnificent Edwardian Satinwood serpentine-fronted display cabinet made £1,800, while a Breitling Navitimer Chronograph watch which had seen better days – the glass scratched and with a crack – went for £1,600. The undoubted highlight of the jewellery section was a beautiful carved jade seed pearl and lapis lazuli necklace. The hammer went down at £1,050 to a buyer in the room. Of local interest was a circular wall clock that formerly graced the gallery at Hatch Beauchamp Church, near Taunton. This attractive timepiece was secured by a phone bidder for £480. There was an eclectic range of items on offer at the sale including an African tribal carved ivory figure. Concerted bidding saw the hammer fall at £680. An early 19th-century album of watercolour sketches by Alicia Anne Shring made £340. A buyer in the saleroom secured a pair of George II silver old English pattern basting spoons for £330. Once again demand for Oriental items proved robust. A successful phone bid of £300 procured a Shibayama inlaid hardwood tablescreen, which was decorated with birds and flowers. Three phone bidders joined the fray to own an Art Deco Carlton ware shaped oval dish. This went for £200. Entries are being accepted for the next sale, which takes place on Thursday, January 9. Free valuation mornings are held each Monday morning from 9am at The Octagon Salerooms, East Reach, Taunton. There is plenty of parking on site. For further details contact the salerooms on 01823 332525.
Oils sell well at the Grange H J Pugh & Co The sale at the Grange, at Acton Beauchamp, was directed by of Mrs Shaw–Cooper. The sale consisted of more than 1,000 lots of top quality period and later furniture, many pictures, porcelain, china, silver and brass. There were also over 200 lots being sold outside which consisted of garden ornaments and
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SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013 WEST COUNTRY LIFE 33
Antiques FROM PAGE 33 outside effects. The sale took place on a crisp Saturday morning at 10am, and by the start of the sale there were over 100 online bidders registered and the marque was almost full. The sale started very well with cast-iron garden benches reaching £120, a pair of cast iron canons reaching £610 and a Victorian cast iron table reaching £130. All of the garden ornaments also sold exceptionally well with a pair of bronze Herons making £320, a pair of Bronze Grey hounds made £780 and a pair of Lion ornaments made £520. After the garden ornaments we moved on to the lots inside the house. The pictures and oil paintings all made very strong prices throughout the course of the sale. An oil on canvas – an early tri-coloured setters on moors, in gilt frame made an outstanding £1,200; an oil on canvas – of a racehorse and groom made £380; a watercolour rural scene in gilt frame made £980; an oil on canvas – woodland landscape scene titled In The Dales made £580. As the sale went on the oil paintings continued to reach fantastic prices, the Victorian oil on canvas – Portrait of Lady reached £1,500 and a 19th-century oil on canvas – Parkland scene with sheep – also made £1,500. All the furniture proved to be very popular among the buyers with one of the early lots being the Fruitwood table which made and impressive £1,650, an early 19th-century rosewood drum table with four drawers made £1,600, an Edwardian satinwood suite of twoseater settee and two armchairs made £820; a 19th-century Rosewood with marquetry inlay and gilded brass mounts Bonheur de Jour made £1,120; a fine quality 18th-century mahogany chest on chest reached £1,850; while a
Georgian mahogany serpentine front chest of three drawers made £1,700. One of the top prices of the day was the Georgian mahogany bow front sideboard which reached £2,200. H J Pugh & co are already planning the next furniture auction which is likely to be towards the end of January. If you have any furniture or would like any advice on furniture, contact us on 01531 631122. For details of future sales and catalogues, go to www.hjpugh.com
Toy cars geared up for sale Smiths Smiths’ Antiques and Collectables Sale on December 6 had a festive feel as mulled wine and mince pies were served during viewing. The atmosphere was also jolly on sale day with a crowded saleroom and strong bidding throughout most of the day. The toy section saw lots of internet bidding among toy collectors including keen competition for a large consignment of over 3,000 model cars and car kits, which had come from a house just outside Monmouth. A Corgi Racing Car Transporter in its original box made £130; while a Britain’s lead Machine Gun Corp, in almost new condition, made £240. Top price in the toy section was £780 paid for a beautiful Collinson rocking horse while a charming clockwork Father Christmas made a very seasonal image on the front of the catalogue and sold for £130. Traditional ceramics performed well including a rare Staffordshire group The Red Barn which made £360 despite being in terrible condition. The gruesome group depicts the so called “red barn” where a young girl, Mary Marten, was murdered and buried under the floor by a William Corder in 1827. Understandably this was not a particularly popular group in its day and this, of course, makes it a very rare item for modern collectors. A much more attractive pair of Staffordshire figures depicting children sleeping across a pair of spaniels made £160; while an early Masons Ironstone wine cooler made £600. There was a flurry of private buyers picking up Christmas gifts in the jewellery section, and top price of the day was made when a diamond solitaire ring made £1,550 closely followed by a diamond brooch which made £1,000. A pair of very wearable diamond earrings sold for £740, while a very pretty emerald and diamond bracelet made £800. Smiths next Antiques and Collectables sale is on January 24 and includes a special section for coins. For all enquiries, call 01531 821776 or see Smiths’ website at www.smithsnewentauctions.co.uk. In the meantime Smiths would like to wish all their customers a very merry Christmas.
Entire store to be sold Stroud The closure of one of the most iconic stores in Berkshire has put the spotlight firmly on a Gloucestershire auction house. Edward Jackson opened the doors of his small gentleman’s outfitters’ shop in September 1875 and over the years E Jackson & Sons Ltd went on to become Reading’s oldest family-run department store. Now, almost 140 years on, Jacksons has closed, and virtually the whole interior of the store will be sold by Stroud Auction Rooms on January 4. The first Jacksons shop opened at No 6 High Street but soon outgrew its premises and gradually expanded to embrace the corner of Reading’s Kings Road and High Street – now known as Jacksons Corner. As it became more successful, Jacksons opened branches throughout Berkshire and for many decades the stores were the first port of call for everything from menswear and formal attire to sporting outfits and school uniforms. In later years it also had dance and bowls departments. For well over a century this outstandingly successful business has given a personal service second to none. All receipts were handwritten and there were no tills to clutter the counters. Instead Jacksons operated the last fully working Lamson pneumatic tube system, which whisked payments away in a
34 WEST COUNTRY LIFE SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013
metal carrier to the cash office, which then dispatched customers’ change in the same manner. Four generations of the Jackson family have run the company with the present managing director being the great-grandson of the founder. Now this amazing time-warp has come to the end of its life and all its fixtures, fittings and stock are to be auctioned on the premises. Travelling to Reading to conduct the sale will be two auctioneers from the Stroud saleroom, Mark Rozelaar and David Lord. Stroud Auctions’ owner Nick Bowkett said: Jacksons of Reading was definitely a landmark and will be greatly missed. But we are privileged to have this opportunity to sell the stock and fittings from this amazing store.” For more details ring Stroud Auction Rooms on 01453 873800 or email email@example.com
A delightful watercolour from the Greenslade Taylor Hunt sale, above; the entire Jacksons store, left, will be for sale at Stroud in the new year; along the bottom, from left, a Clockwork Father Christmas, a Corgi Racing Car Transporter and this Collinson Rocking Horse all did well at Smiths earlier this month; an Art Deco Carlton ware shaped oval dish made £200 at Greenslade Taylor Hunt
SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013 WEST COUNTRY LIFE 35
Television Susan Griffin
Jimi Mistry’s new Corrie character Kal quickly makes friends with Dev (Jimmi Harkishin), far left; and helps Nick (Ben Price) – could Kal be a ladies’ man too? ‘I think to a certain extent he is, yes,’ says Mistry
New Corrie recruit Jimi Mistry has always taken pride in his appearance. But he’s the first to admit that he’s really had to up his game at the gym lately, after joining Coronation Street as an athletic ex-squaddietur ned-personal-trainer. “I didn’t want to let myself down. You’ve got to half look the part,” says the dark-haired and affable 40-year-old, laughing. “I’ve always enjoyed going to the gym and I try to keep reasonably fit, but I’ve been putting myself through the paces.” This has consisted of high-intensity training, “which has been great for shedding the pounds”. His efforts have paid off – Mistry’s looking fit and healthy in jeans and a jumper, having already lost 8kg in the build-up to his debut. “I’ve been good on the food front too, cutting out the enjoyable things in the week, but you have to have a cheat day at the weekend.” Despite the gruelling regime, the former EastEnders star, who left Albert Square back in 2000, has had a lot of fun getting back on the soap treadmill. “Coronation Street has always been described as having a family set-up, and as soon as I arrived, everyone was so friendly and helpful. Everyone in the green room sits together, which makes you feel at home really quickly.” The friendly welcome’s gone some way to easing him into the hectic routine. “I’ve never experienced a filming schedule like this one,” says the actor, who uses the two-hour commute from his home in London to Manchester to learn his lines. “I’ve had jobs where I’ve had to commute to
another country, so this feels as local as can be – and I’ve lots of time to learn lines.” He credits his dad for encouraging him to act, and enrol at the Birmingham School Of Speech And Drama. His character, Kal, was introduced to Street residents this week as an old pal of Gary Windass, played by Mikey North. “They were together in the army so there’s obviously some history there. We’ll have to see if they [the script-writers] decide to develop their friendship,” notes Mistry. “Stuart [Blackburn, the soap’s producer] said he wanted me to have fun with it and bring my own ideas to the table, so I think we’re going to feel our way with Kal.” And that includes a question mark over where he’s from. “For me, that’s great, as it means I can be really free with the character. I’ve done so many accents over the years that this was a great opportunity to roll with it,” says the Scarborough-born star, who’s of half-Indian, half-Irish descent. What we do know is that Kal’s been living with family since his wife died, so they could help out with his kids, including a teenage son who’s “being quite demanding”. He soon makes friends with Dev (Jimmi Harkishin), who lost the love of his life, Sunita, recently, in the Rovers fire. “I was quite nervous about coming in, but Jimmi made me feel really at ease. We play around with our scenes together. I think he’s glad to be doing some more light-hearted stuff.”
36 WEST COUNTRY LIFE SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013
Soap matriarch Barbara Knox, who fans know as Rita, was also very welcoming, as was Ben Price who plays Nick Tilsley. “He was maybe the first to come up and introduce himself and said it was great to have me on board,” says Mistry. He and Price share many scenes, as Kal’s helping Nick rehabilitate following his brain injury. “He’s a trainer who will inspire people to be better. He’s quite a funny, cheeky little chap, too,” the actor notes. And a ladies’ man, perhaps? “I think to a certain extent he is, yes,” admits Mistry. He acknowledges that there are already rumours of him and a certain feisty female getting together. “Ha, yes, there was talk the other day about Kal getting with Liz [Beverley Callard]. Anything’s possible! I’ll just see where it takes me.” The timing couldn’t be better for the actor, who’s engaged to his former Strictly Come Dancing partner Flavia Cacace. The pair met while competing together in the hit show in 2010, and Mistry popped the question last New Year’s Eve. “I didn’t plan on it being then, but it turned out that way,” he says, admitting that he understands why relationships develop between dance partners. “It’s quite an intense time, working closely with one other person. You spend hours and hours together learning a new skill,” he says. “Flavia and I had a friendship first and what we have now came after the show. But there
are relationships and there are relationships. I mean, we’re getting married. “For me, it was about meeting the right person, so it could have been on that show or somewhere else.” A date hasn’t been set for the big day yet. “We’re both incredibly busy. I’ve just started here [on Corrie] and Flavia’s in rehearsals and has lots on. But it’ll happen in the near future,” he adds. “I think it will be quite a private affair.” The impending nuptials were part of the reason he wanted to sign the soap contract. “I’ve done many things in my career and I’ve travelled a lot,” says the actor, who’s also appeared in countless movies. “I’m settling down, so this opportunity to act on a regular basis and be rooted is great.” Growing up, Mistry didn’t watch a great deal of TV (“When I was a child I tended to play sport outdoors”), but he did dip in and out of the soaps. “I’ve always had a soft spot for Coronation Street. It’s tragi-comedy balance really suits my approach, and I’ve always had a fondness for the show in that respect. But I never thought there would be an opportunity to be in it!” And the experience hasn’t disappointed. Mistry adds: “All I know is that this is the happiest I’ve been in my work for a long time.”
Behind the Mistry ■ Jimi Mistry was born on January 1, 1973, in Scarborough, Yorkshire, but later moved to Cardiff. ■ He has a 12-year-old daughter from his first marriage to Meg Leonard. They both live in France. ■ Although his father is Indian Hindu, Jimi was brought up a Roman Catholic, like his Irish mother. ■ He cooks to unwind, especially Mediterranean food, and is a self-confessed recipe book addict. ■ In 2009, he released a documentary on Ibiza called And The Beat Goes On, which he wrote and produced.
Jimi Mistry has returned to soapland after 13 years
Coronation Street airs on ITV on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays WCL-E01-S2
Wake up to the benefits of renting at The Hawthorns FINDING a practical solution which matches the quality of your retirement living dream may be easier said than done – and renting may not automatically spring to the top of your list of possible solutions. However, increasing numbers of UK retirees are discovering what their counterparts in America and Australia found out a few years back – that renting your retirement home offers many advantages over continued property ownership. Even more are discovering how you can continue to benefit from both! The Hawthorns Retirement has brought its highly successful American formula for retirement living to the UK at Eastbourne, Clevedon and Braintree. These developments, in a nutshell, offer you continued independent living, none of the worries of home ownership and total flexibility to change your lifestyle at a month’s notice should circumstances dictate. And all this is achieved by renting your retirement home at The Hawthorns. Your monthly rental includes all your many monthly expenses including all your meals and snacks, utility bills, housekeeping, maintenance – even a free mini-bus to take you to the shops and back. If you sit down and calculate what you are spending on all those items living in your own home, the rental fees appears very reasonable indeed. As well as the financial argument, life at The Hawthorns offers the added benefits of security, companionship and the flexibility of handing in just one month’s notice of your decision to leave. Whilst many residents fund this idyllic retirement lifestyle from the proceeds of the sale of their home, many others opt to rent out their own property and fund their new-found lifestyle from the rental income, maintaining their property as part of their estate. Either way, they enjoy to the full the many benefits of renting, namely: •The freedom to live in new areas or change accommodation as desired •The ability to easily move closer to friends or family members •A lifestyle free from property and ground maintenance and the stress of everyday bills •Enjoying the benefits of quality accommodation more suited to their needs with live-in managers. So whilst home ownership may be central to our traditional aspirations, it’s not necessarily central to the great retirement dream. Maybe you should wake up to the benefits of renting!
To f i n d o u t m o r e p l e a s e c a l l : 0 1 2 7 5 7 9 0 0 6 0
or pop in and visit us at: 18-19 Elton Road, Clevedon, North Somerset, BS21 7EH.
Alternatively find us at: www.hawthornsretirement.co.uk WCL-E01-S2
SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013 WEST COUNTRY LIFE 37
Television and radio FILM CHOICE
TOP TV CHOICE
The Duchess Fact-based period drama chronicling the life of Georgiana Spencer, who became the Duchess of Devonshire in 1774 at the age of 17. Adored by the public for her extravagant lifestyle, Spencer endured a troubled marriage to a considerably older husband who expected her to provide him an heir – despite his infidelities, most notably with her best friend. However, scandal followed when she was eventually driven into the arms of young politician Charles Grey. Meticulous production design, resplendent costumes and voluminous, cascading wigs combined with the pomp and pageantry of mid-18th century high society in all its glory, contribute to a feast for the senses. Keira Knightley is on good form and is ably supported by a superb cast. In the background of the location used for Georgiana and Charles’ first kiss is the building used in the 2005 version of Pride & Prejudice (which also starred Knightley) for Mr Darcy’s first proposal. (BBC Two, Sunday, 8.40pm) The Terminator One of the greatest sci-fi movies of all time, James Cameron’s time-travelling masterpiece catapulted a relatively unknown Arnold Schwarzenegger towards Hollywood superstardom. He stars as a violent cyborg sent from the future to kill waitress Sarah Connor, the woman destined to give birth to the saviour of the human race. It may look a bit dated now, but this saga is what all films of the genre should aspire to be – clever, action-packed and loaded with memorable dialogue, including Arnie’s immortal catchphrase: “I’ll be back”. The Austrian is perfectly cast as the emotionless robot killer, but even he’s upstaged by a mesmerising performance from Linda Hamilton, whose slender shoulders carry the hope of survival for the entire human race. OJ Simpson was considered for the role of the Terminator, but the producers thought he was too nice to be considered a cold-blooded killer. (Five, Wednesday, 10pm)
A Night of Heroes – The Military Awards Forget This Morning or Britain’s Got Talent – the highlight of Phillip Schofield and Amanda Holden’s professional year is hosting this annual ceremony. The event takes place at London’s National Maritime Museum and is now in its sixth year. A total of 10 awards are given those who have made outstanding contributions to Britain’s armed services. They have been judged by a panel that includes Jeremy Clarkson, Andy McNab, Holly Willoughby and Lorraine Kelly, with support from four former military chiefs – General Sir Mike Jackson, Admiral Lord West, Field Marshal Lord Guthrie and ACM Sir Peter Squire. Each year senior members of the royal family attend, along with celebrities from the worlds of sport and entertainment – and although no specific names have been announced yet, we’re promised the appearance of some suitably big names. (Monday, ITV, 9pm)
DVD The Conjuring (15) Roger Perron (Ron Livingston) and wife Carolyn (Lili Taylor) arrive at a rundown farmhouse in Harrisville with their five daughters. Eldest child Andrea (Shanley Caswell) sulks about relocating to the middle of nowhere while sisters Christine (Joey King), Nancy (Haley McFarland), Cindy (Mackenzie Foy) and April (Kyla Deaver) excitedly run from musty room to musty room. The family dog Sadie refuses to enter the property and that first night, the clocks all stop at precisely 3.07am. In the coming days, the Perrons experience increasingly violent episodes, which terrify Carolyn and her brood. In desperation, the family turns to renowned paranormal investigators Ed and Lorraine Warren (Patrick Wilson, Vera Farmiga). Based on a true story, The Conjuring steadily cranks up tension. Wilson and Farmiga are solid and the younger actors brilliantly convey the terror. If you forget to check under your bed before going to sleep tonight, you only have yourself to blame.
IN PROFILE Name Hugh Bonneville Best known for Downton Abbey. Early life Born Hugh Richard Bonneville Williams on November 10, 1963, in London. When he was younger he was often mistaken for rugby hero Will Carling. After leaving school with good exam results, he was accepted by Cambridge University, where he was taught theology by Dr Rowan Williams. “Everything he said went completely over my head,” says Bonneville of Williams’s lectures. Career Following a spell on stage, Bonneville made his TV debut in teen sitcom Dodgem. He spent the next few years dividing his time between theatre, TV and film work, having small parts in such projects as The Memoirs of Sherlock Holmes, Cadfael, Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein, Tomorrow Never Dies, Bugs, and Mosley. He had a regular role in sitcom Holding the Baby, but finally became a recognisable face thanks to the movie Notting Hill in 1999. Since then he’s appeared in The Cazalets, Madame Bovary, The Gathering Storm, Tipping the Velvet, Doctor Zhivago, Iris, Daniel Deronda, Twenty Twelve, Doctor Who and Love Again. He won rave reviews for his role in the TV comedy Freezing and Filth: The Mary Whitehouse Story. However, he’s become a superstar on both sides of the Atlantic thanks to his role in Downton Abbey. Trivia His wife Lulu is an artist. They have a son, Felix, and live in West Sussex. Quote “I was once congratulated in Oxford Street for my brilliant portrayal of Mr Darcy, so apparently I looked like Colin Firth when I had curly hair. I reckon I could play him in a biopic.” See The Sarah Millican Television Programme Christmas Special, Wednesday, BBC Two, 10pm,
RADIO Roddy Doyle’s masterpiece, The Commitments, is brought to life by a team of young actors directed on location in Dublin by Jim Sheridan. Jimmy Rabbite is on a mission – he wants to spread the gospel of soul to Dublin. Barrytown is about to become Motown as Jimmy decides to put a band together. The first of Roddy Doyle’s Barrytown series of novels, all of which are being dramatised by Radio 4, it tells the tale of the eponymous working-class band. With Joey “The Lips” Fagan on trumpet, Billy “The Animal” Mooney on drums, Derek “Meatman” Scully on bass, Dean “Good Times” Fay on sax, L. Terence Foster on guitar, James the Soul Surgeon Clifford on piano and – not forgetting the singers – Declan Blanketman Cuffe and The Commitmentettes, this Dublin band brings soul, the working man’s rhythm, to Dublin. (BBC Radio 4, Sunday 3pm)
TV QUIZ ANSWERS 1 August 8, 1963 2 Paddy McGuinness, Christine Bleakley, Holly Willoughby and Phillip Schofield 3 Gwilym Lee 4 PD James 5 Peep Show
38 WEST COUNTRY LIFE SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013
Devon singer Luke Friend takes on Sam Bailey and Nicholas McDonald in the final of the X Factor tonight. Also starring across the weekend’s two shows will be Elton John, One Direction and Katy Perry, as judges Sharon Osborne, Louis Walsh, Gary Barlow and Nicole Scherzinger sign off for another year
1 The BBC will air two films about The Great Train Robbery on Thursday, December 18 and Friday, December 19. What date did the robbery take place? 2 Ant and Dec will be co-hosting Text Santa on ITV on Friday, December 20 with which four other presenters? 3 Midsomer Murders is back for another series on Tuesday, December 24. What's the name of the actor who will play DCI John Barnaby's new side-kick? 4 BBC One will be airing an adaptation of Death Comes To Pemberley from Thursday, December 26. What's the name of the author who wrote it? 5 Cast Your Mind Back... Olivia Colman stars in two dramas over the festive break, The Thirteenth Tale and The 7.39. What programme did she star in with David Mitchell and Robert Webb?
Television Susan Griffin
Roy James, Gordon Goody, Bruce Reynolds, Buster Edwards, Ronnie Biggs and Charlie Wilson star as the nation’s most famous – and indeed favourite – thieves
It’s a bone-chillingly cold day on set and the crew are making it look like summer. This is, after all, the set of A Robber’s Tale and the farm on the outskirts of Leeds is hosting the aftermath of the biggest robbery in the country’s history – the Great Train Robbery, which took place on August 8, 1963. “Apparently, it was the coldest August here in history, so we’re not detracting too far from 1963,” says Luke Evans, who plays chief protagonist Bruce Reynolds. Despite his unremarkable outfit, a blue boiler suit, the Hollywood actor rolls up to the dilapidated farmhouse looking debonair, his dark hair combed in period style. Evans’s costars, Martin Compston and Paul Anderson, have even called him a Cary Grant lookalike, a comment he says he gets often. The 34-year-old Welshman’s demeanour suits his character, given that Bruce Reynolds was regarded as a charismatic figure.
“He was a super-sharp dresser and had his own tailors. Even when everybody else was slovenly dressed, he always had his tie perfectly positioned. He was the whole package.” The film begins with a previous robbery at Heathrow Airport in November 1962, and then shows how Reynolds assembled and led the gang that targeted the August Bank Holiday mail train from Glasgow, running off with £2.6 million (the equivalent of more than £40 million today). “It wasn’t supposed to be that amount of money and, while all the other boys were excited about it, Bruce was thinking, ‘Well this is all well and good, but how are we going to get the money back to London and get it clean?’ He was always one step ahead of the rest of the team.” The drama also details the fall-out from the
coshing of the train driver, Jack Mills, and why, within days of the robbery, the gang’s safe house had to be evacuated and all those involved were forced to go on the run – some, for the rest of their lives. Reynolds fled the UK with his wife and son, but in 1968, the law caught up with him and he was jailed. Years later, he wrote a tell-all book, The Autobiography of a Thief: The Man Behind The Great Train Robbery. “In Bruce’s book, he talks about how much he liked the planning part, guessing what the police would do and thinking of all the contingency plans,” says Evans. “I can imagine them questioning and examining all the areas for hours and hours, because Bruce wasn’t very good at failing. He wanted to be the best and, the only way you can be the best, is if you’re very thorough.” A second film called A Copper’s Tale, detailing the police hunt and starring Jim Broadbent, will air the following night, which Evans says is an inspired idea. “There were some fantastic characters on the police side and, in a way, the robbers mirrored the coppers. Some of them were leaders and some of them were followers, so when it goes out on the screen, people will be able to see the similarities between the both sides.” Evans would have loved the opportunity to meet Reynolds, but he died, aged 81, in February. “He could’ve been many things, because he was very capable in many different fields, but he chose to be a criminal – and he became one of the best,” says the actor, who’d been researching the role for a few months when the death was announced. “It felt like I knew him
slightly,” he adds. “Bruce was a great writer and he was always very adventurous in his ideas, a visionary – and I liked that about him. I saw a bit of myself in the young Bruce.” While he makes it clear that he doesn’t think the robbers should be admired (“At the end of the day, they broke the law,“) he admits that the reaction they got from the general public was intriguing. “People were in a moral dilemma when asked what they thought. They were a bit like: ‘It’s amazing they got away with it, good on them!’ It seemed like they’d done the impossible, so I think it did capture the heart of the nation.” And not only here but across the world. “I went to LA just before I started this and I was on a set talking to American actors, and they’d heard about it, they knew about this story!” remarks Evans, who appeared in the sixth Fast & Furious movie earlier this year. Since graduating from the London Studio Centre, the performing arts college he won a scholarship to, Evans has focused on film, starring in the likes of Clash Of The Titans, Tamara Drewe, The Three Musketeers and Immortals, but having seen the great drama being produced for TV, he says he “wanted to be part of it”. “Then this came along and I thought the script was brilliant,” he says. “There are a lot of fantastic characters and hopefully we do them all justice. “I feel very responsible, even more so now Bruce has passed on. I just want to bring the story that captured everyone’s imagination to life on its 50th anniversary.” A Robber’s Tale airs on BBC One on Wednesday, December 18, and A Copper’s Tale airs on Thursday, December 19
PICKS OF THE WEEK
HISTORY There’s more to it than surfers and tourists, as Cornwall: Walking Through History shows. (Channel 4, Saturday, 8pm)
WEATHER We love to chat about weather, but Britain's Killer Storms gives us more to chew on. (Channel 4, Sunday, 7.30pm)
TRIBUTE Friends and colleagues including Thurston Moore and Debbie Harry remember musician Lou Reed, who died this year.
FOOD Tom Kerridge proves that there’s little better than a heaving table for Christmas (BBC Two, Monday, 8.30pm)
DRAMA The final part in this gripping dramatisation of the disappearance of Lord Lucan. (ITV, Wednesday, 9pm)
FESTIVE Looking at the nation’s obsession with crazy Christmas lights, for charity or just for fun. (Five, Wednesday, 9pm)
SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013 WEST COUNTRY LIFE 39
Saturday television&radio Saturday’s Television Guide TV PICKS
STRICTLY COME DANCING 6.40pm, BBC1
Bruce Forsyth and Tess Daly host the semi-final, in which the twinkletoed celebrities battle it out in the ballroom for a coveted place in next week’s final.
6.00 Breakfast (S,HD). 10.00 Saturday Kitchen Live (S). 11.30 Food & Drink (R,S,HD). 12.00 Football Focus (S,HD). 12.45 Saturday Sportsday (S,HD). 1.00 BBC News; Regional News and Weather (S,HD). 1.15 Gymnastics (S). 4.00 Final Score (S,HD). 5.30 BBC News; Regional News and Weather (S,HD). 5.50 Pointless Celebrities (S,HD). With Graeme Garden, Dan Snow, Susie Dent, and Germaine Greer. Last in the series.
FILM RATINGS ●●●●● Excellent ●●●● Very good ●●● Good ●● Average ● Poor
THE JONATHAN ROSS SHOW 10.05pm, ITV
Manchester United and England legend David Beckham is in the studio for his first TV interview since retiring from football, and Will Ferrell talks about his long-awaited comedy sequel Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues. Leona Lewis spreads some festive cheer performing a Christmas classic.
6.00 This Is BBC Two (S). 6.35 Film: Teacher’s Pet (S) (2004). ●●● 7.45 Film: Anything But Christmas (S,HD) (2012). ●●● 9.15 Film: Animal Farm (S) (1954). ●●●● 10.30 Reel History of Britain (R,S). 11.00 Animal Park (R,S). 12.00 Christmas Kitchen with James Martin (R,S,HD). 2.15 Coast (R,S,HD). 3.10 Doctor Who Mastermind (R,S). 3.40 Weakest Link (R,S). 4.30 Flog It! (R,S,HD). 5.30 Film: Tron (S) (1982). ●●●
THE X FACTOR 8pm, ITV
The three remaining acts head to Wembley Arena to battle it out in the first part of the final, featuring performances by the Killers and Tom Odell. Dermot O’Leary presents.
6.00 Babar and the Adventures of Badou (R,S). 6.10 The Cat in the Hat Knows a Lot About That 6.35 Dino Dan (R,S). 7.00 Canimals (R,S). 7.15 Text Santa (R,S). 7.25 Bookaboo (S). 7.35 Horrid Henry R,S). 7.45 Text Santa (R,S). 7.50 Kick Buttowski – Suburban Daredevil (S). 8.15 Bottom Knocker Street (S). 8.30 Munch Box (S). 9.25 ITV News (S). 9.30 Home of Fabulous Cakes (HD). 10.30 Murder, She Wrote (R,S,HD). 11.25 News 11.30 Film: Columbo: Agenda for Murder (S) (1990). ●● 1.30 Doc Martin (R,S). 2.30 Film: Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (HD) (2004). ●●●● 5.05 Big Christmas Reunion (HD).
THE BIBLE 9pm, Channel 5
Jerusalem is invaded and the Jews are forced once more into exile, while nobleman Daniel disobeys a command not to worship God and is thrown into the lion’s den. The story then moves on to the New Testament, with the Angel Gabriel telling Mary she has been chosen to bear the Son of God.
Channel Channel 4
6.15 The Hoobs (R,S). 6.40 Beach Volleyball (R,S). 7.30 Survival of the Fittest (S). 8.00 The Morning Line (S). 9.00 The American Football Show (S). 10.00 Frasier (R,S). 10.30 Everybody Loves Raymond (R,S). 11.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 11.55 The Simpsons (R,S). 12.25 Heston’s Fantastical Christmas (R,S,HD). 1.30 Channel 4 Racing (S). 4.00 Come Dine with Me (R,S,HD).
Channel Channel 5
6.00 Milkshake!. 10.00 Power Rangers: Megaforce (S,HD). 10.35 Slugterra (S,HD). 11.00 The Great Christmas Toy Giveaway (R,S,HD). 1.05 Inside Hollywood. 1.10 World’s Scariest Weather (R,S,HD). 2.05 Film: Will You Merry Me? (S,HD) (2008). ●● 3.50 Film: The Christmas Heart (S,HD) (2012). ●●● 5.35 Film: Mistletoe Over Manhattan (S,HD) (2011). Christmas fantasy, starring Tricia Helfer and Greg Bryk. ●●
(R) repeat (S) subtitles (HD) highdefinition
6.35 News (S).
7.00 Me, You and Doctor Who: A Culture Show Special (S). 23/32. The enduring appeal and cultural impact of the sci-fi series.
7.00 The Chase: Celebrity Special (S,HD). 11/14. With Arlene Phillips, Diarmuid Gavin, Helen Skelton and Micky Flanagan. Bradley Walsh hosts.
7.05 Marvel’s Agents of SHIELD (R,S,HD). 10/22. Coulson takes the war back to Centipede, and this time he brings in Mike Peterson for some super-soldier support.
7.15 The Real St Nick (S,HD) (2012). Premiere. Romantic comedy, with Torrey DeVitto, Callard Harris, Matt Felker, Kenneth Choi, Roma Maffia and Alix Elizabeth Gitter. ●●●
8.00 Tron: Legacy (S,HD) (2010). See Choices Above. ●●●
8.00 Cornwall: Walking Through History (S). 3/3. Tony Robinson treks along the coastline between Plymouth in Devon and Falmouth, learning about the smuggling trade in Cornwall during the late 18th century. Last in the series.
8.55 5 News Weekend (S,HD).
9.55 The Science of Doctor Who (R,S,HD). Professor Brian Cox examines the science behind the long-running sci-fi series and explores the physics that allows the Doctor to travel through space and time.
8.00 The X Factor (S,HD). 22/22. They wowed the judges at the double auditions, beat the competition at boot camp and made it through nine weeks of live studio rounds. Now, the three remaining acts head to Wembley Arena to battle it out in the first part of the final. At the end of the show, Dermot O’Leary announces the results of the phone-in and the least popular contestant gets the chop. There are also performances by rock band the Killers and Tom Odell. Concludes tomorrow at 7.30pm. See Choices Above.
9.00 Psychopath Night (S). See Choices Above.
9.00 The Bible (S,HD). 3/5. See Choices Above.
6.05 Regional News (S); Weather. 6.15 ITV News and Weather (S). 6.30 New You’ve Been Framed! (S). Toddlers wrestle for a place in a good nursery.
8.20 Atlantis (S,HD). 11/13. Jason helps himself to an abandoned feast, which causes him to start demonstrating some seriously strange behaviour, and it falls to Hercules and Pythagoras to save their friend.
Cornwall: Walking Through … 8pm
9.05 Casualty (S,HD). 18/48. A young couple have a festive holiday they will never forget when they are forced to seek refuge at a farm for the birth of their baby. 9.55 The National Lottery Live (S,HD). Chris Evans reveals the results.
The Chase: Celebrity Special, 7pm
10.05 BBC News; Weather (S,HD). 10.25 Match of the Day (S,HD). Highlights of the latest Premier League fixtures, which included Manchester City v Arsenal at the Etihad Stadium and Newcastle United v Southampton at St James’ Park. Followed by National Lottery Update.
10.55 The Wrong Mans (S). 1/6. A case of mistaken identity catapults two council employees into the middle of a deadly criminal conspiracy. Comedy thriller, with James Corden and Mathew Bayntono.
10.05 The Jonathan Ross Show (S,HD). 10/10. See Choices Above.
6.40 Strictly Come Dancing (S,HD). 23/26. Bruce Forsyth and Tess Daly enter the ballroom once again to host this year’s semi-final, in which the twinkle-toed celebrities will be hoping to pull off their best performances yet as they tackle two dances each. See Choices Above.
The Science of Doctor Who, 9.55pm
11.55 The Football League Show (S). Manish Bhasin presents highlights and all the goals from today’s fixtures in the Championship, League One and League Two, including Leicester City v Burnley.
11.25 The Wrong Mans (S). 2/6. Sam and Phil try to rescue Mr Stevens’ wife. 11.55 The Wrong Mans (S). 3/6. Sam and Phil go on the run.
11.10 ITV News and Weather (S); Weather. 11.25 Take Me Out (R,HD). 8/8. A rugby player, a student, a morris dancer and a security adviser take part. Last in the series.
6 7 8 9
1.05 Weatherview (S). 1.10 BBC News (S,HD).
12.25 Film: Shout at the Devil (S) (1976). A drunken American and an Old Etonian Englishman involved in poaching in Zanzibar find their illicit activities disrupted by the area’s German colonial commissioner. Action adventure, starring Lee Marvin, Roger Moore, Ian Holm and Jean Kent. ●● 2.35 This Is BBC Two (S). Preview of upcoming programmes from BBC Two.
12.50 Jackpot247. Viewers get the chance to participate in live interactive gaming from the comfort of their sofas, with a mix of roulette-wheel spins and lively chat from the presenting team. 3.00 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA (R,S). The host takes his successful talk show stateside. 3.45 ITV Nightscreen (HD). Text-based information service.
40 WEST COUNTRY LIFE SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013
The Bible, 9pm
10.55 Clear and Present Danger (S,HD) (1994). A CIA analyst gets caught up in the Colombian drug trade while trying to track down terrorists responsible for the murder of a close friend of the US president – but his investigations point to illegal activity and corruption at the very top of government. Action thriller, based on Tom Clancy’s novel, with Harrison Ford reprising his role from Patriot Games alongside Willem Dafoe, Anne Archer and James Earl Jones. See Choices Above. ●●●
10.50 Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves (S,HD) (1991). An English nobleman returns home from the crusades to find his father has been murdered and the local people are repressed by the tyrannical rule of the Sheriff of Nottingham. Branded an outlaw, he recruits a group of bandits to fight for justice and protect the downtrodden. Action adventure, starring Kevin Costner, Alan Rickman, Morgan Freeman and Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio. ●●●●
1.35 Stand Up for the Week (R,S,HD). Paul Chowdhry hosts the satirical comedy show. 2.20 Fresh Meat (R,S,HD). The housemates take part in a protest. 3.05 The Silent City. Film by Ruairi Robinson set in a post-apocalyptic landscape. 3.15 Hollyoaks (R,S,HD). Omnibus. 5.25 90210 (S,HD). Naomi and Max host a charity event together.
1.50 SuperCasino. 3.10 Secrets of the Vanishing Sphinx (R,S,HD). 4.00 Wildlife SOS (R,S). 4.20 Make It Big (R,S). 4.50 Roary the Racing Car (R,S). 5.00 Angels of Jarm (R,S). 5.10 Hana’s Helpline (R,S). 5.20 Angels of Jarm (R,S). 5.25 The Funky Valley Show (R,S). 5.40 Roary the Racing Car (R,S). 5.50 Hana’s Helpline (R,S).
PSYCHOPATH NIGHT 9pm, Channel 4
THE XTRA FACTOR 10.05pm, ITV2
Caroline Flack and Matt Richardson present the companion show, getting the first reactions from the contestants and judges following the night’s performances after the first stage of the final. Viewers put their questions directly to the acts and judges via social media.
Documentary going inside the minds of psychopaths, finding out how to spot them and counting down the top 10 mentally deranged movie characters, as selected by experts.
6.00 Coronation Street (HD). 8.15 Emmerdale (HD). 11.10 The X Factor USA (HD). 2.00 Peter Andre: My Life (R,HD). 3.00 The Only Way Is Essexmas (R,HD). 4.05 I’m a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here Now! Trials and Tribulations (R,HD). 5.10 You’ve Been Framed! Christmas (R). 5.40 Film: Johnny English (HD) (2003). ●●●
The Perfect Storm, 7.25pm
7.25 The Perfect Storm (HD) (2000). The skipper of a fishing boat and his crew ignore severe weather warnings and head for a dangerous area of the North Atlantic in search of the last lucrative catch of the season, but end up fighting for survival in the worst storm of the 20th century. Fact-based disaster drama, with George Clooney, Mark Wahlberg, Diane Lane, John C Reilly and Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio. Including FYI Daily. ●●●
10.05 The Xtra Factor (HD). See Choices Above.
6.00 Charmed (R). 6.50 Made in Chelsea (R). 7.45 Prep & Landing (R,HD). 8.10 Prep & Landing (R,HD). 8.40 Rules of Engagement (R,HD). 11.05 Mindy Project (R,HD). 11.35 How I Met Your Mother (R,HD). 12.35 Rules of Engagement (R,HD). 1.30 2 Broke Girls (R,HD). 2.00 Film: Never Been Kissed (HD) (1999). ●●● 4.05 How I Met Your Mother (HD). 5.05 Big Bang Theory (R,HD).
6.00 Luton Airport (R,S). 7.00 Ashley Banjo’s Secret Street Crew (R,S,HD). 8.00 The Fantasy Football Club. 9.00 Game Changers. 10.00 Soccer AM. 12.00 WWE Superstars (HD). 1.00 Micro Monsters with David Attenborough (R,S,HD). 2.30 Harrow (R,S,HD). 3.30 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S). 4.30 Portrait Artist of the Year (R).
Saturday television&radio TRON: LEGACY 8pm, BBC2
CLEAR AND PRESENT DANGER 10.55pm, Channel 4
Premiere. A man searching for his father is sucked into a computer-generated world. Sci-fi adventure, with Jeff Bridges and Garrett Hedlund.
6.00 Sykes. 6.30 The Brittas Empire. 7.00 To the Manor Born. 8.15 dinnerladies. 9.00 Bring Me Morecambe & Wise. 10.00 Bring Me Morecambe & Wise. 11.00 The Two Ronnies Sketchbook. 12.00 Two Ronnies Spectacle. 1.00 The Two Ronnies Spectacle. 2.00 Only Fools and Horses. 3.40 Only Fools and Horses. 4.50 Only Fools and Horses.
Action thriller, with Harrison Ford reprising his role from Patriot Games alongside Willem Dafoe and Anne Archer.
SkySports1 Sky Sports 1
6.00 FIFA Futbol Mundial. 6.30 Ringside (HD). 7.30 Premier League Preview (HD). 8.00 The Fantasy Football Club (HD). 9.00 Game Changers (HD). 10.00 Soccer AM (HD). 12.00 FL72 Live (HD). 2.30 Saturday Team Talk (HD). 3.00 Soccer Saturday (HD). 5.00 Live Saturday Night Football (HD). Hull City v Stoke City (Kick-off 5.30pm).
Last Action Hero, 9pm
Men Behaving Badly, 10pm
6.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,HD). Leonard confronts a bully from his past. 6.30 2 Broke Girls (R,HD).
6.00 All Aboard: East Coast Trains (R,HD). Newcastle Central Station prepares for one of the country’s biggest football matches.
7.00 How I Met Your Mother (R,HD). Barney tells Nora about his relationship with Robin. 7.30 Suburgatory (R,HD).
7.00 Inside RAF Brize Norton (R,S,HD). Emergency crews step in when a Hercules’ landing gear fails.
6.00 The Best of Les Dawson. 6.40 John Le Mesurier: It’s All Been Rather Lovely. A portrait of the prolific actor’s life and career, from his turbulent marriage to Hattie Jacques to his role as Sergeant Wilson in the wartime sitcom Dad’s Army.
8.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,HD). Sheldon is encouraged to feign interest in Amy’s career. 8.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,HD). Comedy, starring Johnny Galecki and Kaley Cuoco.
8.00 The Simpsons (R,S). Bart pulls out all the stops to pass a school exam, determined to avoid the humiliating prospect of being held back a year. 8.30 The Simpsons (R,S). Mrs Krabappel looks for love.
9.00 Die Hard (HD) (1988). New York cop John McClane visits Los Angeles to see his family over the Christmas holiday. Stopping off at his wife’s place of work, he realises armed men have taken over the building and are holding the corporation’s staff to ransom - and only he has the ability to fight back. Action thriller, starring Bruce Willis, Alan Rickman and Bonnie Bedelia. ●●●●●
9.00 Bring Me Morecambe 9.00 Last Action Hero (S) & Wise. Celebrating the (1993). A boy watching comedy duo’s series of an action movie is sketches based around transported into the film plays that Ernie wrote. by a magic ticket and Plus, a look at the movies meets its hero figure, the duo appeared in and who refuses to believe he the actors who guestis a fictional character. starred on their show. Matters take a turn for the worse when the screen villain gets hold of 10.00 Men Behaving Badly. 10.00 SNF – Match Choice the ticket and crosses Tony and Gary try hard (HD). Extended highover into the real world to celebrate Christmas in lights from the Premier where bad guys can win. style, but a glimpse of League, allowing viewers Comedy adventure, how married life might to access the latest round starring Arnold have been with Deborah of top-flight fixtures, Schwarzenegger, Austin and Dorothy underlines which included Chelsea v O’Brien, Charles Dance, F what a terrible time they Crystal Palace, Everton v Murray Abraham and are having. Fulham and West Ham Anthony Quinn. ●●● United v Sunderland.
8.00 Bring Me Morecambe & Wise. A compilation of the comedy duo’s sketches, featuring some of their most famous routines alongside more obscure material.
FL72 Live, 12pm
(HD). Sarah-Jane Mee presents a full re-run of the day’s top Premier League match.
12.10 Fearne and James Blunt (R,HD). The presenter follows the day-to-day life of the singersongwriter. 1.10 The X Factor (R,HD). The three remaining acts battle it out in part one of the final. 2.55 Teleshopping. Buying goods from the comfort of home. 5.55 ITV2 Nightscreen (HD).
12.00 Saturday Reloaded (HD). A round-up of the latest football goals from the top flight, Championship, League One and League Two. 1.00 SNF – Match Choice (HD). Extended highlights from the Premier League. 2.30 SNF – Match Choice (HD). 4.00 SNF – Match Choice (HD). 5.30 FL72 Highlights (HD).
11.30 FL72 Highlights (HD). Leicester City v Burnley. Action from the opening Championship match of the weekend, which took place at the King Power Stadium.
Radio 1 5.00am Rob da Bank 7.00 Gemma Cairney 10.00 Matt Edmondson 1.00pm Huw Stephens 4.00 Radio 1’s Dance Anthems with Danny Howard 7.00 MistaJam. Underground dance music. 9.00 Charlie Sloth 11.00 DJ Target 1.00am Diplo and Friends 3.00 Friction Radio 2 6.00am Anneka Rice 8.00 Sounds of the 60s 10.00 Graham Norton 1.00pm Pick of the Pops 3.00 Dermot O’Leary 6.00 Liza Tarbuck 8.00 Johnnie Walker’s Long-Players 9.00 Johnnie Walker Meets Bruce Springsteen 10.00 Sounds of the 80s Midnight Bob Harris Sunday 3.00 Richard Allinson
12.50 Spartacus: Gods of the Arena (R,S,HD). 2.05 Road Wars (R,S). Police officers combat vehicle crime. 2.30 Caribbean Cops (R,S,HD). 3.20 Nothing to Declare (R,S). 3.45 Nothing to Declare (R,S). 4.10 Dog Patrol (R,S). 4.35 Dog Patrol (R,S). 5.00 Dog Patrol (R,S). 5.30 Dog Patrol (R,S).
Radio 3 7.00am Breakfast 9.00 News 9.03 CD Review 12.15pm Music Matters 1.00 News 1.02 Radio 3 Lunchtime Concert 2.00 Saturday Classics 4.00 Jazz Line-Up 5.00 Jazz Record Requests 6.00 Opera on 3: Live from the Met 9.30 The Wire: Fit to Burst 10.15 Hear and Now – Huddersfield Contemporary Music Festival Midnight Geoffrey Smith’s Jazz 1.00 Through the Night Radio 4 5.30am (LW) Test Match Special 5.30 (FM) News Briefing 5.43 (FM) Prayer for the Day 5.45 (FM) iPM 6.00 (FM) News and Papers 6.07 (FM) Open Country 6.30 (FM) Farming Today This Week 6.57 (FM) Weather
7.00 (FM) Today 9.00 (FM) Saturday Live 10.30 John Clare’s Playlist 11.00 The Week in Westminster 11.30 From Our Own Correspondent Noon News 12.01 (LW) Shipping Forecast 12.04 Money Box 12.30 The News Quiz 12.57 Weather 1.00 News 1.10 Any Questions? 2.00 Any Answers? 2.30 Saturday Drama: Winter Exercise 3.30 Soul Music 4.00 Weekend Woman’s Hour 5.00 Saturday PM 5.30 iPM 5.54 Shipping Forecast 5.57 Weather 6.00 Six O’Clock News 6.15 Loose Ends 7.00 Profile 7.15 Saturday Review. Tom Sutcliffe and guests examine the week’s cultural highlights. 8.00 Archive on 4: The Haunted Apparatus
12.20 The Comic Strip Presents: Private Enterprise. A small-time crook steals a demo tape from a recording studio. 1.05 Men Behaving Badly. Christmas proves to be a time for reflection. 1.50 Gimme Gimme Gimme. Linda and Tom land new jobs. 2.20 Harry Enfield and Chums. 9.00 Classic Serial: James M Cain’s The Butterfly. By James M Cain. A Godfearing farmer is surprised by a visitor to his cabin. 10.00 News and Weather 10.15 The Moral Maze. With Michael Portillo, Melanie Phillips, Kenan Malik and Matthew Taylor. Last in the series. 11.00 Brain of Britain 11.30 A Notebook on Aimé Césaire Midnight News and Weather 12.30 Three for My Baby 12.48 Shipping Forecast 1.00 As BBC World Service 2.00 (LW) Test Match Special 5.20 Shipping Forecast Radio 5 Live 5.00am Morning Reports 6.00 The Ashes: Breakfast 9.00 The Danny Baker Show 11.00 Fighting Talk Noon 5 Live Sport
7.00 Winter Wipeout (R,S). Total Wipeout – with added snow and ice. 8.00 Top Gear (R,S). With Blur bassist Alex James. 9.00 Russell Howard’s Good News (R,S). An edition from 2010. 9.30 Russell Howard’s Good News (R,S). Highlights from the comedian’s 2011 series. 10.00 Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy (S) (2004). Comedy, with Will Ferrell and Christina Applegate. ●●● 11.35 Family Guy (R,S).
12.00 Family Guy (R,S). 12.20 Family Guy (R,S). 12.45 Family Guy (R,S). 1.05 Family Guy (R,S). 1.30 Family Guy (R,S). 1.55 Family Guy (R,S). 2.15 Family Guy (R,S). 2.40 Sweat the Small Stuff (R,S). 3.10 Him & Her: The Wedding (R,S). 8.00 SNF – Game of the Day 3.40 C-Bomb (R,S).
11.00 Gimme Gimme 11.40 The Inbetweeners (R). 11.35 Spartacus: Gods of 11.05 Celebrity Juice: Gimme. Linda and Tom Simon faces a dilemma the Arena (R,S,HD). Christmas Special land new jobs. when his new girlfriend Titus announces a tour(R,HD). Festive edition says she will kiss him nament to determine of the comedy quiz. Last 11.40 Harry Enfield and only if he lets her redethe worth of his stable in the series. Chums. First-ever sign his wardrobe, and of gladiators, and Crixus episode of the sketch Will considers spending becomes embroiled in show. time with a boring date. the politics of the house. 12.15 The Inbetweeners (R). The gang visits a university. 12.50 Rude Tube: Epic Fails (R). 1.55 Rules of Engagement (R,HD). 2.25 The Cleveland Show (R,HD). 2.45 The Cleveland Show (R,HD). 3.10 Bob’s Burgers (R,HD). 3.30 Glee (R,HD). 4.15 Glee (R,HD). 5.00 Ugly Betty (R,HD).
7.00 Frozen Planet (R). What rising temperatures will mean for life in the polar regions. Last in the series. 8.00 Shipwrecks: Britain’s Sunken History (R). The shipwrecks of the Georgian age. 9.00 Borgen. With the general election nearing, the mudslinging begins, and Birgitte fights to keep her integrity and win votes. Drama, with Sidse Babett Knudsen. 10.00 Borgen. The day of the election finally arrives. Last in the series. 11.00 Definitely Dusty (R). Archive performances by Dusty Springfield. 12.00 Dusty Springfield at the BBC (R). 1.00 Dusty (R). 1.25 Sounds of the 70s 2 Rock – The Boys Are Back in Town (R). 1.55 Frozen Planet (R). 2.50 Shipwrecks: Britain’s Sunken History (R).
12.45 5 Live Sport: Premier League Football 2013-14 3.00 5 Live Sport: Premier League Football 2013-14 5.00 Sports Report. Including the classified football results. 6.06 6-0-6. Phone-in on the day’s football action. 8.00 Saturday Edition. Chris Warburton presents news and quirky stories on the web. 10.00 Stephen Nolan. A phone-in on the day’s events. 1.00am Up All Night Classic FM 6.00am More Music Breakfast 9.00 Alan Titchmarsh Noon Nicholas Owen 3.00 Jamie Crick 5.00 Saturday Night at the Movies 7.00 Alex James’s Magical Musical Tour 9.00 The New Releases Show 10.00 Smooth Classics Midnight Bob Jones
SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013 WEST COUNTRY LIFE 41
Sunday’s Television Guide Sunday television&radio SPORTS PERSONALITY OF THE YEAR 2013 7.40pm, BBC1
Gary Lineker, Gabby Logan and Clare Balding present this year’s ceremony live from the First Direct Arena in Leeds.
6.00 Breakfast 7.30 Match of the Day 9.00 The Andrew Marr Show 10.00 Fern Britton Meets Ken Dodd 11.00 Wanted Down Under 11.45 Helicopter Heroes Down Under 12.15 MOTD2 Extra 1.00 BBC News 1.15 Regional Programme 2.15 Bargain Hunt 3.00 Escape to the Country 3.45 Christmas Supermarket Secrets 4.45 Lifeline 4.55 Songs of Praise 5.30 BBC News; Regional News and Weather
FILM RATINGS ●●●●● Excellent ●●●● Very good ●●● Good ●● Average ● Poor
THE GREAT BRITISH SEWING BEE CHRISTMAS SPECIAL 7.40pm, BBC2
Judges Patrick Grant and May Martin reunite with the show’s semi-finalists Stuart, Sandra and Lauren and winner Ann to pool their experience and talents to make everything from Christmas table linen to exquisite tree decorations.
6.00 This Is BBC Two (S). 6.55 Film: The Valley of Gwangi (S) (1968). ●● 8.30 Life in a Cottage Garden with Carol Klein (R,S,HD). 9.00 Life in a Cottage Garden with Carol Klein (R,S,HD). 9.30 Saturday Kitchen Best Bites (S). 11.00 Christmas Kitchen with James Martin (R,S,HD). 12.30 EastEnders (R,S,HD). 2.20 Film: Around the World in 80 Days (S) (1956). Adventure, starring David Niven. ●●●● 5.05 Flog It! (S). 5.55 Ski Sunday (S,HD).
THROUGH THE CHRISTMAS KEYHOLE 9.30pm, ITV
Keith Lemon returns with a festive rummage through the homes of three mystery celebrities, challenging regular panellist Dave Berry and guests to guess their identities.
6.00 CITV 9.25 ITV News (S). 9.30 Storage Hoarders (R,S,HD). 10.30 Sunday Side Up (S,HD). 11.30 Scoop (S). 12.30 News (S). 12.35 Inside the National Trust (S,HD). 1.35 Let’s Do Christmas with Gino & Mel (S). 2.35 Love Your Garden (R,S,HD). The team transforms an overgrown and unloved garden. 3.35 The X Factor (R,S,HD). The three remaining acts battle it out in part one of the final. 5.40 You’ve Been Framed! (R,S).
BRITAIN’S FAVOURITE CHRISTMAS SONGS 9.30pm, Channel 5
A countdown of songs that are guaranteed to make any Christmas party go with a swing. Highlights include the Greg Lake’s I Believe in Father Christmas, the Waitresses’ Christmas Wrapping and the Pogues and Kirsty MacColl’s Fairytale of New York.
Channel Channel 4
6.10 The Hoobs (R,S). 6.35 The American Football Show (R,S). 7.30 Anglesey Sandman Triathlon (R,S). 8.00 Jamie’s Money Saving Meals (R,S,HD). 9.30 Sunday Brunch (S). 12.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 1.30 The Simpsons (R,S). 2.30 Gadget Man (R,S,HD). 3.05 Film: Diary of a Wimpy Kid (S,HD) (2010). ●●● 5.00 Channel 4 News (S). 5.20 Film: Fred Claus (S,HD) (2007). Comedy, starring Vince Vaughn and Paul Giamatti. ●●
Channel Channel 5
6.00 Milkshake!. 10.00 Power Rangers: Super Samurai (S,HD). 10.35 Slugterra (S,HD). 11.00 Inside Hollywood. 11.05 Stop! Police Interceptors (R,S). 12.10 Film: Battle of the Bulbs (S,HD) (2010). ●●● 1.55 Film: A Star for Christmas (S,HD) (2012). ●●● 3.40 Film: The Polar Express (S,HD) (2004). Adventure, with the voice of Tom Hanks. ●●● 5.40 Film: A Christmas Carol: The Musical (S) (2004). Musical, with Kelsey Grammer. ●●●●
6.40 Sports Personality of the Year at 60 (R,S,HD). A look at the history of the ceremony, which has become a sports and broadcasting institution since first being held in 1954.
6.05 Regional News (S); Weather. 6.15 ITV News and Weather (S). 6.30 The Chase: Celebrity Special (S,HD). 12/14.
7.00 Strictly Come Dancing: The Results (S,HD). 24/26. 7.40 Sports Personality of the Year 2013 (S,HD). Gary Lineker, Gabby Logan and Clare Balding present this year’s ceremony live from the First Direct Arena in Leeds, where the successor to Sir Bradley Wiggins will be crowned. The 10 contenders for the main prize are Wimbledon champion Andy Murray, Tour de France victor Chris Froome, America’s Cup sailor Ben Ainslie, athletics gold medallists Mo Farah, Christine Ohuruogu and Hannah Cockroft, England cricketer Ian Bell, British & Irish Lions hero Leigh Halfpenny, record-breaking jockey AP McCoy and US Open golf champion Justin Rose. See Choices Above.
7.40 The Great British Sewing Bee Christmas Special (S,HD). See Choices Above.
10.00 BBC News; Regional News and Weather (S,HD). 10.25 Match of the Day 2 (S,HD). Mark Chapman reviews the day’s Premier League action, featuring Tottenham Hotspur v Liverpool, Aston Villa v Manchester United and Norwich City v Swansea City.
10.20 QI XL (S,HD). 13/16. Extended edition. Comedy writer and performer Victoria Wood and Pointless co-host Richard Osman make their debuts on the comedy quiz, joining standup Jason Manford and regular panellist Alan Davies.
11.35 Adventureland (S,HD) (2009). See Choices Above. ●●●●
11.05 Hebburn (R,S,HD). 5/6. A national newspaper publishes an extract from Jack’s pregnancy diary. 11.35 Never Mind the Buzzcocks (R,S,HD). 12/13. Music quiz.
1.15 Weatherview (S). 1.20 BBC News (S,HD).
12.05 Sign Zone: The Culture Show: Sylvie Guillem – Force of Nature (R,S). A profile of the French ballet dancer. 12.35 Sign Zone: Countryfile (R,S). John Craven visits Jodrell Bank Observatory in Cheshire. 1.30 Sign Zone: Holby City (R,S). Elliot agrees to perform a difficult operation. 2.30 This Is BBC Two (S). Preview of upcoming programmes from BBC Two.
6.00 Countryfile (S,HD). The team is in Cornwall, where Matt Baker visits Prideaux Place stately home.
You’ve Been Framed!, 5.40pm
QI XL, 10.20pm
6 7 8 9
Match of the Day 2, 10.25pm
(R) repeat (S) subtitles (HD) highdefinition
8.40 The Duchess (S,HD) (2008). Fact-based period drama, chronicling the life of Georgiana Spencer who became Duchess of Devonshire in 1774 at the age of 17. Adored by the public for her extravagant lifestyle, Spencer endured a troubled marriage and was eventually driven into the arms of Charles Grey, a senior Whig politician. Starring Keira Knightley, Ralph Fiennes, Dominic Cooper and Charlotte Rampling. See Choices Above. ●●●
42 WEST COUNTRY LIFE SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013
The Abba Years, 12.30am
7.30 The X Factor Results (S,HD). 22/22. With part one of the final behind them, this is the last chance for the two remaining acts to impress the public in the race to become this year’s X Factor winner. The judges offer their comments as usual, but the result is entirely in viewers’ hands, and at the end of the show, Dermot O’Leary reveals which of the potential pop stars will walk away with the prize of a record deal.
7.30 Britain’s Killer Storms (S). The story of five major storms that battered the nation throughout 2012. Each of them carried a deadly threat, from hurricane-force winds to flash flooding, and this programme hears from people who survived them. It combines archive footage with reconstruction and satellite images to piece together how these extreme weather events were formed, what made them unique and the impact they had. See Choices Above.
7.25 Ghost Rider (S,HD) (2007). Motorcycle stuntman Johnny Blaze sells his soul to diabolical Mephistopheles to save the life of his father. His bargain dooms him to pass each night as Ghost Rider, a demonic skeletal biker bound to take evil souls to Hell. However, conflict between Mephistopheles and his son offers Johnny the chance to win back his humanity. Fantasy thriller based on the comicbook, starring Nicolas Cage and Eva Mendes. Edited for violence and flashing images. ●●●
9.30 Through the Christmas Keyhole (S,HD). See Choices Above.
9.00 Homeland (S,HD). 11/12. Carrie infiltrates Tehran to support the mission, but Brody’s loyalty wavers when he is reunited with a familiar face from his past. Meanwhile, as Lockhart’s confirmation looms, Saul considers the possibilities of success and failure.
9.25 5 News Weekend (S,HD). 9.30 Britain’s Favourite Christmas Songs (R,S). A countdown of popular songs that are guaranteed to make any Christmas party go with a swing. Highlights include the Jackson 5’s Santa Claus Is Coming to Town, Greg Lake’s I Believe in Father Christmas, the Waitresses’ Christmas Wrapping and the Pogues and Kirsty MacColl’s Fairytale of New York. Is Mud’s Lonely This Christmas past its sell-by date? Will Jona Lewie ever Stop the Cavalry? And where would any Christmas party be without Slade and their classic anthem Merry Xmas Everybody? But which one will top the nation’s festive chart? Featuring contributions by artists, producers, video directors, composers and journalists, who reveal an insight into the creation of the songs and their accompanying videos. See Choices Above.
10.30 ITV News and Weather (S); Weather. 10.45 Hellboy II: The Golden Army (S,HD) (2008). The demon superhero, aided by a team from the Bureau of Paranormal Research and Defence, leads the fight against renegade elf Prince Nuada who is intent on reawakening an unstoppable robot army and bringing about the demise of mankind. Action fantasy sequel directed by Guillermo del Toro, starring Ron Perlman, Selma Blair, Doug Jones and Luke Goss. ●●●●
10.00 Your Highness (S,HD) (2011). Premiere. Dashing Prince Fabious is the greatest hero in the kingdom, while his younger brother Thadeous is a lazy, selfcentred fool. When the princess Fabious is due to marry is kidnapped by an evil wizard, the two brothers must go on a dangerous quest to rescue her, with a little help from a vengeful warrior woman. Fantasy comedy, with Danny McBride, James Franco and Natalie Portman. ●●
12.50 The Store. 2.50 Motorsport UK (HD). Highlights of the final races of the season from Brands Hatch, including the Formula Ford Championship and Ginetta GT Cup. Commentary by Richard John Neil. 3.40 ITV Nightscreen (HD). Text-based information service. 5.05 The Jeremy Kyle Show: 5 Days of Christmas (R,S). Guests air their differences.
12.05 Alan Carr: Chatty Man (R,S,HD). Guests include Seann Walsh and Michael Buble. 1.00 American Football Live (S). All the action from a match in the NFL, as the race to reach the end-of-season playoffs continues. 4.45 KOTV Boxing Weekly (R,S). Lee Haskins v Jason Booth. 5.15 Countdown (R,S,HD). 5.55 Suburgatory (S,HD).
12.30 The Abba Years (R,S). 1.30 SuperCasino. 3.10 The Gadget Show (R,S,HD). 4.00 Wildlife SOS (R,S). 4.25 Make It Big (R,S). 4.50 Roary the Racing Car (R,S). 5.00 Angels of Jarm (R,S). 5.05 Hana’s Helpline (R,S). 5.20 Angels of Jarm (R,S). 5.25 The Funky Valley Show (R,S). 5.40 Roary the Racing Car (R,S). 5.50 Hana’s Helpline (R,S).
REVOLUTION 10pm, Sky1
Charlie and Monroe make for an impressive double act when they join forces, while Rachel and Gene struggle to pick up the pieces and move on. Aaron and Cynthia have a run-in with Dr Horn, and Neville issues a determined proclamation after receiving a surprise.
Feature-length documentarydrama telling the story of five major storms that battered the nation throughout 2012, hearing from people who survived them.
6.00 Life’s Funniest Moments 6.20 Emmerdale 8.55 Coronation Street 11.20 The X Factor 1.30 The Xtra Factor 2.30 I’m a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here Now! Best of the Bush 3.30 I’m a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here Now! Crown Jewels (R,HD). 4.30 You’ve Been Framed at Christmas (R). 5.30 Film: Two Weeks Notice (HD) (2002). ●●
Land of the Lost, 7.30pm
6.00 Switched 6.25 Charmed 7.10 Prep & Landing 7.35 Prep & Landing 8.00 Rules of Engagement 8.55 How I Met Your Mother 9.55 Hollyoaks (HD). 12.30 Made in Chelsea 1.35 2 Broke Girls (R,HD). 2.00 Big Bang Theory (R,HD). 3.00 The Big Bang Theory: Geekiest Guest Stars (R,HD). (R,HD). 4.55 Film: Dear John (HD) (2010). ●●●●
6.00 Hour of Power 7.00 Harrow 8.00 All Aboard 9.00 Inside RAF Brize Norton 10.00 WWE Superstars 11.00 WWE: Experience 12.00 Micro Monsters with David Attenborough 1.30 Ashley Banjo’s Secret Street Crew 2.30 Frozen Special 3.00 Futurama 5.00 Stephen Fry/Andy Serkis: Face 2 Face 5.30 Simpsons
The Inbetweeners, 10pm
BRITAIN’S KILLER STORMS 7.30pm, Channel 4
ADVENTURELAND 11.35pm, BBC1
Sunday television&radio THE DUCHESS 8.40pm, BBC2
A college graduate falls in love while spending a summer working at a ramshackle amusement park in the 1980s. Comedy, with Kristen Stewart.
6.10 Sykes. 6.40 The Brittas Empire. 7.15 Sykes. 7.55 Bread. 8.35 The Brittas Empire. 9.10 The Best of Les Dawson. 9.45 John Le Mesurier: It’s All Been Rather Lovely. 11.05 Only Fools and Horses. 1.30 Only Fools and Horses. 2.40 Only Fools and Horses. 3.45 Only Fools and Horses. 4.50 Only Fools and Horses.
I’m Alan Partridge, 10.55pm
6.00 The Simpsons (HD). 6.30 Yonderland (S,HD). Debbie is captured and taken to a village inhabited by idiots.
6.00 The Green Green Grass. The Driscoll brothers catch up with Boycie. John Challis and Sue Holderness star.
7.30 Land of the Lost (HD) (2009). An eccentric scientist sets out to prove his debunked theories on interdimensional travel by building a machine to transport him to other universes. Comedy adventure, starring Will Ferrell, Anna Friel and Danny McBride. Including FYI Daily. ●●
7.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,HD). 7.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,HD). Leonard breaks his and Sheldon’s roommate agreement.
7.00 The Simpsons (R,S). Bart does community service. 7.30 The Simpsons (R,S). Marge breaks her leg.
7.05 Ricky Tomlinson: Sitcom Does Christmas. The Royle Family star presents classic Christmas sitcom moments.
8.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,HD). 8.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,HD). Sheldon and Kripke battle it out to get Professor Rothman’s vacant corner office.
8.00 The Simpsons (S). Homer enrols on a fathering enrichment course. 8.30 The Simpsons (S). Groundskeeper Willie is forced to move in with the family.
8.05 The Two Ronnies Spectacle. The threepart documentary concludes with a look at the duo’s musical numbers and the ongoing serial sketches.
9.30 The Xtra Factor (HD). Caroline Flack and Matt Richardson interview the 2013 winner, and get the first reactions from the contestants and judges following the final of the competition.
9.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,HD). Sheldon becomes terrified of getting his hair cut. 9.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,HD). Sheldon is hurt when Professor Proton contacts Leonard. With Jim Parsons.
9.00 Arrow (R,S,HD). Oliver suspects there is more to a Central City police scientist than meets the eye, but is preoccupied by a robbery, and Roy crosses paths with Brother Blood.
9.05 The Vicar of Dibley. Alice suggests an unconventional nativity play starring herself and Hugo as Mary and Joseph, and adds an extra touch of authenticity by going into labour midperformance.
An 18th-century duchess enduring a troubled marriage is driven into the arms of a prominent politician. Fact-based drama, starring Keira Knightley.
Sky Sports 1 SkySports1
6.00 SNF – Match Choice (HD). 7.30 Game Changers (HD). 8.30 FL72 Highlights (HD). 9.00 The Sunday Supplement (HD). 10.30 Goals on Sunday (HD). A review of yesterday’s football action. 12.30 Live Super Sunday (HD). Aston Villa v Manchester United (Kick-off 1.30pm). 3.30 Live Super Sunday (HD). Tottenham Hotspur v Liverpool (Kick-off 4.00pm).
Live Super Sunday, 12.30pm
7.00 Live World PDC Darts Championship (HD). The third evening of the event at the Alexandra Palace in London, where the first-round matches continue in the most prestigious tournament on the calendar. On this day last year, Raymond van Barneveld lit up the tournament with a sensational performance against Michael Smith, as Andy Hamilton, Gary Anderson and Brendan Dolan joined him in progressing through to the second round. Plus, coverage of a preliminary-round fixture.
7.00 Doctor Who: The Ultimate Guide (R,S). Part one of two. An in-depth look at the sci-fi show. 8.00 Great Movie Mistakes 2013 (R,S). A selection of blunders in Hollywood films. 10.00 Family Guy (R,S). Peter tells the story of Christmas – with a twist. 10.25 The Revolution Will Be Televised (S). Dale Maily attends Notting Hill Carnival. Last in the series. 10.55 Family Guy (R,S). The Drunken Clam is turned into an English pub. 11.20 American Dad! (R,S). 11.45 American Dad! (R,S). 12.05 Backchat with Jack Whitehall and His Dad 12.35 The Revolution Will Be Televised 1.05 Film: Metro (S) (1997). ●● 2.55 Snow, Sex and Suspicious Parents (R,S).
7.00 Jet! When Britain Ruled the Skies (R). Two-part documentary examining advances in British aviation in the 1950s and 60s. 8.00 Jet! When Britain Ruled the Skies (R). Part two of two. The development of passenger jets. 9.00 Lou Reed Remembered. The life and career of the rock legend. 10.00 David Bowie – Five Years (R). Exploring five key years in the singer’s career. 11.30 Evidently – John Cooper Clarke (R). A celebration of the punk poet’s life and work. 12.30 Film: Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders from Mars (1973). ●●●● 2.00 The Genius of David Bowie (R). 3.00 Lou Reed Remembered (R).
10.30 The Fast and the 10.00 The Inbetweeners (R). 10.00 Revolution (S,HD). See 10.00 Porridge. Fletch tries desperately to distance Choices Above. Furious: Tokyo Drift Simon faces a dilemma. himself from an escape (HD) (2006). An 10.35 The Inbetweeners (R). plan, convinced it is American teenager is Simon and his girlfriend doomed from the sent to live with his Tara visit her sister at outset. father in Tokyo after a university, so the other brush with the law, but 10.55 I’m Alan Partridge. boys make excuses to soon becomes involved Alan seeks excitement. join them on the trip. in illegal street racing. Comedy, starring Steve Comedy, starring Joe When he ends up owing Coogan. Thomas. money to gangsters, he has to learn to master 11.35 Getting On. Den makes 11.30 Champions League 11.10 Rude Tube: Epic Fails 11.00 Banshee (R,S). Sheriff the Japanese style of an effort to win the Weekly. A look back at (R). Alex Zane counts Lucas Hood displays his driving to win and pay Nurse of the Year title, the matchday six fixtures, down the top 50 video own brand of law back his debts. Action Kim hopes to receive a which included Napoli v clips where things fail to enforcement at an adventure, starring pay rise in her annual Arsenal, Manchester go to plan, featuring a illegal rave organised by Lucas Black, Nathalie assessment, and Pippa’s United v Shakhtar festival-goer who a local drug dealer, while Kelley and Bow Wow. future comes under Donetsk and Barcelona v mistakes a urinal for a Carrie pleads with him Including FYI Daily. ●● scrutiny. Celtic. sink. to leave town.
12.40 The Big Christmas Reunion (R,HD). The bands from The Big Reunion series get together to make a charity Christmas single. 1.40 The Vampire Diaries (R,HD). 2.25 Life’s Funniest Moments (R). 2.50 Teleshopping. 5.50 ITV2 Nightscreen (HD).
12.10 Misfits (R,HD). Final ever episode of the comedy drama. Last in the series. 1.10 The Cleveland Show (R,HD). 1.40 The Cleveland Show (R,HD). 2.10 The Cleveland Show (R,HD). 2.35 Rules of Engagement (R,HD). 2.55 The Mindy Project (R,HD). 3.15 Hollyoaks (R,HD).
Radio 1 5.00am Seani B 7.00 Gemma Cairney 10.00 Matt Edmondson 1.00pm Huw Stephens 4.00 The Official Chart Show with Jameela Jamil 7.00 Dan & Phil 9.00 The Surgery with Aled & Dr Radha 10.00 Annie Mac Midnight BBC Introducing with Jen and Ally 2.00 Monki 4.00 Dev Radio 2 6.00am The Sunday Hour 7.00 Clare Balding 9.00 Steve Wright’s Sunday Love Songs 11.00 Weekend Wogan 1.00pm Elaine Paige on Sunday 3.00 Johnnie Walker’s Sounds of the 70s 5.00 Paul O’Grady 7.00 Sunday Night with Michael Ball 9.00 Clare Teal 11.00 Don Black Midnight Janice Long 2.00 Alex Lester
12.10 Road Wars (R,S). 12.40 Road Wars (R,S). 1.10 Road Wars (R,S,HD). 2.10 Nothing to Declare (R,S). 2.40 Nothing to Declare (R,S). The work of customs officers in Australia. 3.10 Caribbean Cops (R,S,HD). 4.00 Dog Patrol (R,S). 4.30 Dog Patrol (R,S). 5.00 Dog Patrol (R,S). 5.30 Dog Patrol (R,S).
Radio 3 7.00am Breakfast 9.00 News 9.03 Sunday Morning with James Jolly Noon Private Passions 1.00 News 1.02 Lunchtime Concert 2.00 Live in Concert 4.00 Choral Evensong 5.00 Dies Natalis 5.30 Words and Music 6.45 Sunday Feature: Ideas of Germany 7.30 Live in Concert 10.00 Drama on 3: Ghosts 11.25 BBC Proms 2013 12.30am Through the Night Radio 4 5.30am (LW) Test Match Special 5.30 (FM) News 5.43 (FM) Bells on Sunday 5.45 (FM) Profile 6.00 (FM) News 6.05 (FM) Something Understood 6.35 (FM) On Your Farm 6.57 (FM) Weather 7.00 (FM) News 7.07 (FM) Sunday Papers 7.10 (FM) Sunday 7.55
(FM) Radio 4 Appeal 7.57 (FM) Weather 8.00 (FM) News 8.07 (FM) Sunday Papers 8.10 (FM) Sunday Worship 8.48 (FM) A Point of View 8.58 (FM) Tweet of the Day 9.00 (FM) Broadcasting House 10.00 (FM) The Archers 10.30 (LW) The Archers 11.15 Desert Island Discs Noon News 12.01 (LW) Shipping Forecast 12.04 I’m Sorry I Haven’t a Clue 12.30 The Food Programme 12.57 Weather 1.00 The World This Weekend 1.30 Hardeep’s Sunday Lunch 2.00 Gardeners’ Question Time 2.45 The Listening Project 3.00 Classic Serial: Roddy Doyle’s The Commitments 4.00 Open Book 4.30 Poetry Please Special: Edge 5.00 Inside the Fed 5.40 Profile
12.10 The Comic Strip Presents: The Strike. A naive writer’s screenplay chronicling the miners’ strike is snapped up by a ruthless Hollywood producer, who turns it into an action movie starring Al Pacino and Meryl Streep. 1.25 I’m Alan Partridge. 1.55 Getting On. 2.25 dinnerladies. 5.54 Shipping Forecast 5.57 Weather 6.00 News 6.15 Pick of the Week 7.00 The Archers 7.15 Meet David Sedaris 7.45 Modern Welsh Voices 8.00 Feedback 8.30 Last Word 9.00 Money Box 9.26 Radio 4 Appeal 9.30 In Business 9.59 Weather 10.00 The Westminster Hour 11.00 The Film Programme 11.30 Something Understood Midnight News 12.15 Thinking Allowed 12.45 Bells on Sunday 12.48 Shipping Forecast 1.00 As BBC World Service 2.00 (LW) Test Match Special 5.20 Shipping Forecast Radio 5 Live 5.00am Morning Reports 5.30 The Non League Football Show 6.00 The Ashes: Breakfast
12.00 Spanish Football (HD). Osasuna v Real Madrid. 1.00 Spanish Football (HD). Barcelona v Villarreal. 2.00 Football Special (HD). 3.30 Champions League Weekly (HD). A look back at matchday six. 4.00 Football Special (HD). 5.30 Champions League Weekly (HD). 9.00 SportsWeek 10.00 Pienaar’s Politics 11.00 5 Live Investigates Noon 5 Live Sport 12.15 MOTD2 Extra 1.00 5 Live Sport 1.30 5 Live Sport: Premier League Football 2013-14 3.30 5 Live Sport 4.00 5 Live Sport: Premier League Football 2013-14 6.06 6-0-6 7.30 Sports Personality of the Year 10.00 Stephen Nolan 1.00am Up All Night Classic FM 6.00am More Music Breakfast 9.00 Aled Jones Noon Laurence Llewelyn-Bowen 3.00 Charlotte Green’s Culture Club 5.00 The Classic FM Chart 7.00 David Mellor 9.00 Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Classical Music 10.00 Smooth Classics Midnight Bob Jones
SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013 WEST COUNTRY LIFE 43
Monday television&radio Monday’s Television Guide TV PICKS
RIPPER STREET 9pm, BBC1
As death stalks Whitechapel, Reid and Drake face a showdown with Jedediah Shine, while Jackson and his brother seek to profit from the diamond.
6.00 Breakfast (S,HD). 9.15 Heir Hunters (R,S,HD). 10.00 Homes Under the Hammer (R,S,HD). 11.00 Caught Red Handed (R,S,HD). 11.30 Helicopter Heroes (S,HD). 12.15 Bargain Hunt (S,HD). 1.00 BBC News; Weather (S,HD). 1.30 Regional News (S); Weather. 1.45 Perfection (S,HD). 2.30 Escape to the Country (R,S). 3.30 Christmas Kitchen with James Martin (S,HD). 4.15 Flog It! (S,HD). 5.15 Pointless (R,S,HD).
FILM RATINGS ●●●●● Excellent ●●●● Very good ●●● Good ●● Average ● Poor
A NIGHT OF HEROES – THE MILITARY AWARDS 9pm, ITV
Phillip Schofield and Amanda Holden present the ceremony from London’s National Maritime Museum. They are joined by a host of stars from the worlds of film, TV, music and sport, plus senior members of the royal family, to honour the achievements of Britain’s armed forces.
6.00 This Is BBC Two (S). 6.35 Homes Under the Hammer (R,S,HD). 7.35 Helicopter Heroes (R,S,HD). 8.20 Sign Zone: The A to Z of TV Cooking (R,S). 9.05 The House That £100K Built (R,S). 10.05 Britain’s Empty Homes (R,S). 10.35 Click (R,S,HD). 11.00 BBC News (S,HD). 11.30 BBC World News (S,HD). 12.00 Daily Politics (S). 1.00 One Man and His Campervan (R,S,HD). 1.30 Fred Dibnah’s Age of Steam (R,S). 2.00 Cash in the Attic (R,S). 2.45 Madagascar (R,S,HD). 3.45 Cagney & Lacey (R,S). 4.30 Are You Being Served? (R,S). 5.00 ’Allo ’Allo! (R,S). 5.30 Priceless Antiques Roadshow (R,S).
TOM KERRIDGE COOKS CHRISTMAS 8.30pm, BBC2
The chef puts his own spin on festive fare, demonstrating a twist on the traditional roast turkey and preparing a fruity and spicy alternative to Christmas pudding.
6.00 Daybreak (S,HD). 8.30 Lorraine (S). 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,S). 10.30 This Morning (S). 12.30 Let’s Do Christmas with Gino & Mel (S). 1.30 ITV News and Weather (S). 1.55 Regional News (S). 2.00 Peter Andre’s 60 Minute Makeover (S,HD). 3.00 Dickinson’s Real Deal (S,HD). David Dickinson and the antiques dealers visit Carlisle. 3.59 Regional Weather (S). 4.00 Show Me the Telly (S,HD). 5.00 The Chase (R,S,HD).
MONTY HALLS AND THE GHOST SHIP OF THUNDER BAY 9pm, Channel 5
The explorer and his team head to Thunder Bay in Michigan to dive to the almost-intact wreck of grain schooner the Cornelia B Windiate, which sank in Lake Huron in November 1875, leading to the loss of all crew. Last in the series.
Channel Channel 4
6.15 According to Jim (R,S,HD). 7.05 Will & Grace (R,S). 7.55 Everybody Loves Raymond (R,S). 9.00 Frasier (R,S). 10.00 Ruth Watson Means Business! (S,HD). 11.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 12.00 Come Dine with Me (R,S). 2.10 Phil Spencer: Secret Agent (S,HD). 3.10 Countdown (S,HD). 4.00 Deal or No Deal (S,HD). Beat-the-banker game show. 5.00 Four in a Bed (S,HD). 5.30 Come Dine with Me Christmas (S,HD).
Channel Channel 5
6.00 Milkshake!. 9.45 Inside Hollywood (R). 9.50 Paul Merton in Europe (R,S). 10.50 Eddie Stobart: Trucks and Trailers (R,S,HD). 11.50 Charley Boorman’s USA Adventure (R,S,HD). 12.50 5 News Lunchtime (S,HD). 12.55 Neighbours (S,HD). 1.25 Chinese Food in Minutes (R,S). 1.30 Film: Christmas Wishes (S,HD) (2012). ●●● 3.15 Film: Mr St Nick (S) (2002). ●● 5.00 5 News at 5 (S,HD). 5.30 Neighbours (R,S,HD).
The Choir: Sing While You … 9pm
Tales from Northumberland … 8pm
Fresh Meat, 10pm
Thieves and Thugs … 12am
6.00 BBC News (S,HD); Weather. 6.30 Regional News (S); Weather.
6.00 Regional News (S); Weather. 6.30 ITV News and Weather (S).
6.00 The Simpsons (S,HD). 22/23. 6.30 Hollyoaks (S,HD). Sienna becomes dangerously irrational after the disaster at her engagement party.
6.00 The Dog Rescuers (R,S,HD). 1/10. The work of RSPCA officers. 6.30 NewsTalk Live (S,HD).
7.00 The One Show (S,HD). 7.30 Fightback Britain (S,HD). Including the jeweller who took his baseball bat to robbers. Followed by BBC News; Regional News.
6.00 Celebrity Eggheads (S,HD). 6/10. 6.30 Strictly Come Dancing – It Takes Two (S,HD). 56/60. Zoe Ball chats to the dancers eliminated in the semi-final. 7.00 Nigellissima – An Italian Inspired Christmas (R,S,HD). Nigella Lawson prepares dishes for a Christmas party with an Italian twist.
7.00 Emmerdale (S,HD). David tells Priya about his engagement to Alicia. 7.30 Coronation Street (S,HD). Peter and Carla return from their honeymoon.
7.00 News (S). 7.55 4thought.tv (S). Talks on whether people should limit the size of their families.
7.00 World’s Strongest Man 2013: Qualifiers (S,HD). New series. Action from the Giants Live Series event in Melbourne, Australia. Followed by 5 News Update.
8.00 EastEnders (S,HD). Carol puts off going to see the doctor about her discovery. 8.30 The Romanians Are Coming? – Panorama (S,HD). The potential impact of Romanians achieving full UK employment rights next year.
8.00 University Challenge (S,HD). 23/37. Two more teams battle it out for a place in the quarterfinals. 8.30 Tom Kerridge Cooks Christmas (S,HD). See Choices Above.
8.00 Tales from Northumberland with Robson Green (S,HD). 7/8. The actor meets the residents of Howick Hall. 8.30 Coronation Street (S,HD). Tina tries to make Peter jealous, and Brian asks Julie to move to Wales with him.
8.00 Kirstie’s Crafty Christmas (S). See Choices Above.
8.00 The Gadget Show (S,HD). Rachel Riley and Jason Bradbury try to turn RoboJase into a stand-up comedian, Alex Polizzi tests three new mini-tablets and Jon Bentley assesses budget smartphones. Followed by 5 News at 9.
9.00 Ripper Street (S,HD). 8/8. See Choices Above.
9.00 The Choir: Sing While You Work (S,HD). 7/8. Gareth Malone’s four workplace choirs perform gospel and soul songs in front of a panel of judges as they compete for three places in next week’s final.
9.00 A Night of Heroes – The Military Awards (S,HD). See Choices Above.
9.00 Liberty of London (S,HD). 3/3. The department store is gearing up for the most important six weeks of the retail year – the festive season – and managing director Ed Burstell wants the Christmas facade to be as eye-catching as possible. Last in the series.
9.00 Monty Halls and the Ghost Ship of Thunder Bay (S,HD). 4/4. See Choices Above.
6 7 8 9
The One Show, 7pm
10.00 BBC News (S,HD). 10.25 Regional News (S); Weather. 10.35 Have I Got a Bit More News for You (S,HD). 10/11. Martin Clunes chairs the quiz, with Ab Fab star Jennifer Saunders and veteran actor Bernard Cribbins joining Ian Hislop and Paul Merton to have a laugh at this week’s news-makers.
10.00 Never Mind the Buzzcocks (S,HD). 13/13. Johnny Vegas hosts a festive edition, with Brian McFadden, Jessica Hynes, DJ Locksmith and Sara Pascoe joining captains Noel Fielding and Phill Jupitus. Last in the series. 10.30 Newsnight (S,HD). Followed by Weather.
10.30 ITV News and Weather (S).
10.00 Fresh Meat (S,HD). 7/8. The housemates throw Howard a birthday party, but Oregon is keen to hijack the event and turn it into a fundraiser for her campaign to become president of the student union. 10.50 The Inbetweeners (R,S). 1/6. First-ever episode of the comedy, starring Simon Bird.
(R) repeat (S) subtitles (HD) highdefinition
11.20 India: A Dangerous Place to Be a Woman (S,HD). Radha Bedi travels to India to discover what life is like for women in the country and meets the victims of assaults, including a 15-year-old girl who suffered an acid attack.
11.20 Pilgrimage with Simon Reeve (R,S,HD). 2/3. Simon investigates ancient routes and shrines across Europe that are still being used.
11.00 Regional News (S); Weather. 11.05 Cliffhanger (S,HD) (1993). See Choices Above. ●●●●
11.20 The Inbetweeners (R,S). 2/6. The four lads play truant. 11.50 The Inbetweeners (R,S). 3/6. Simon passes his driving test, so the lads decide to take a trip to a theme park.
12.20 The Graham Norton Show (R,S,HD). Graham chats to Hollywood actordirector Ben Stiller about his new movie The Secret Life of Walter Mitty, and Martin Freeman, as The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug is released in cinemas. Chef Jamie Oliver will be joining them on the sofa, and Jessie J provides the music. 1.05 Weatherview (S). 1.10 BBC News (S,HD).
12.20 Sign Zone: Film 2013 (R,S). Reviews of The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug, Peter Jackson’s latest chapter in his Middleearth saga starring Martin Freeman and Ian McKellen, and Israeli drama Fill the Void. 12.50 This Is BBC Two (S). Preview of upcoming programmes from BBC Two. 4.00 BBC Learning Zone.
1.05 Jackpot247. Interactive gaming. 3.00 Champions League Weekly (S,HD). A look back at the matchday six fixtures, which included Napoli v Arsenal, Manchester United v Shakhtar Donetsk and Barcelona v Celtic. 3.25 ITV Nightscreen (HD). Text-based information service. 5.05 The Jeremy Kyle Show: 5 Days of Christmas (R,S).
12.20 The Inbetweeners (R,S). Will finds a girlfriend. 12.50 Film: Conviction (S,HD) (2010). See Choices Above. ●●● 2.35 Nashville (S,HD). Rayna and Juliette are nominated for an award. 3.15 Suburgatory (S,HD). 3.35 Secret Removers (S,HD). 4.30 Deal or No Deal (R,S,HD). 5.25 Countdown (R,S,HD).
44 WEST COUNTRY LIFE SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013
10.00 Deep Blue Sea (HD) (1999). A scientist researching Alzheimer’s disease devises a way to enlarge the brains of killer sharks on an isolated research facility to help develop her theories. However, the experiments result in a marked increase in the creatures’ intelligence, and before long they manage to escape their confinement – with bloody consequences. Thriller, starring Saffron Burrows, Thomas Jane, Stellan Skarsgard, LL Cool J and Samuel L Jackson. ●●●
12.00 Thieves and Thugs: Caught on Camera The use of CCTV to tackle violent crime. 1.00 SuperCasino Live interactive gaming. 3.40 Hatfields & McCoys The two clans come face to face in a gunfight at Grapevine Creek. Last in the series. (R,S). 5.10 Wildlife SOS (R,S). 5.35 Michaela’s Wild Challenge (R,S).
KIRSTIE’S CRAFTY CHRISTMAS 8pm, Channel 4
ARROW 8pm, Sky1
Kirstie Allsopp presents a festive guide to arts and crafts, showing how to create gifts, decorations and treats in next to no time, and visiting a Christmas fair for inspiration.
Oliver does battle with a new foe, in the shape of the Acolyte – but Starling City’s hero comes off worse, having been drugged and left for dead. Felicity comes to the rescue with a cure, but the hallucinatory side-effects force him to confront some demons from the past.
6.00 Emmerdale (R,HD). 6.25 Coronation Street (R,HD). 7.20 You’ve Been Framed! (R). 7.45 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA (R). 8.30 Dinner Date (R,HD). 9.30 Real Housewives of New York City (R,HD). 10.25 Real Housewives of New Jersey (HD). 12.25 Emmerdale (HD). 12.55 Coronation Street (HD). 1.55 Jeremy Kyle Show 4.05 Real Housewives of New Jersey (R,HD).
6.00 Switched (R). 6.25 Ugly Betty (R,HD). 7.10 Charmed (R). 8.00 Glee (HD). 9.00 How I Met Your Mother (R,HD). 9.30 2 Broke Girls (R,HD). 10.00 How I Met Your Mother (R,HD). 11.00 Rules of Engagement (R,HD). 11.30 Charmed (R). 12.30 Hollyoaks (R,HD). 1.00 How I Met Your Mother (R,HD). 2.00 Big Bang Theory (R,HD). 3.00 Rude(ish) Tube. 4.00 Rules of Engagement (R,HD). 5.00 How I Met Your Mother (R,HD).
Sky1 Sky1 6.00 Dog the Bounty Hunter (R,S). 7.00 The Middle (R,S,HD). 8.00 Stargate Atlantis (R,S,HD). 9.00 Hawaii Five-0 (R,S,HD). 10.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S,HD). 12.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S,HD). 2.00 Hawaii Five-0 (R,S,HD). 3.00 Stargate Atlantis (R,S,HD). 4.00 The Simpsons (R,S). 5.00 The Middle (R,S,HD). 5.30 The Middle (R,S,HD).
Monday television&radio CLIFFHANGER 11.05pm, ITV1
CONVICTION 12.50am, Channel 4
Action thriller, starring Sylvester Stallone, John Lithgow, Janine Turner, Michael Rooker, Rex Linn, Caroline Goodall, Leon and Craig Fairbrass.
Gold GOLD 6.10 Sykes. 6.45 The Brittas Empire. 7.15 Ever Decreasing Circles. 7.55 Sykes. 8.30 The Brittas Empire. 9.20 Only Fools and Horses. 11.35 Only Fools and Horses. 12.40 Only Fools and Horses. 1.55 Ricky Tomlinson: Sitcom Does Christmas. 2.55 The Green Green Grass. 4.00 Last of the Summer Wine.
Premiere. Fact-based drama, starring Hilary Swank, Sam Rockwell, Minnie Driver, Peter Gallagher, Melissa Leo, Clea Duvall, Juliette Lewis and Loren Dean.
SkySports1 Sky Sports 1 6.00 Good Morning Sports Fans (HD). 7.00 Good Morning Sports Fans (HD). 8.00 Good Morning Sports Fans (HD). 9.00 Football Special (HD). 10.30 FL72 Highlights (HD). 11.00 Spanish Football (HD). 12.00 World PDC Darts Championship (HD). Highlights of the third evening of the event. 5.00 Soccer AM: The Best Bits (HD).
Knocked Up, 11pm
Made in Chelsea, 10pm
Strike Back: Shadow … 9pm
The Royle Family, 10pm
Live Darts, 7pm
6.00 Dinner Date (R,HD). Londoner Tom hopes to find love. Narrated by Charlotte Hudson.
6.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,HD). Raj’s parents set him up on a blind date. 6.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,HD).
6.00 Yonderland (R,S,HD). Debbie is captured and taken to a village inhabited by idiots. 6.30 The Simpsons (R,S,HD).
6.00 The Two Ronnies Sketchbook. Ronnie Corbett and Ronnie Barker reminisce about their all-time favourite sketches.
7.00 You’ve Been Framed! (R). Comical clips, narrated by Harry Hill. 7.30 You’ve Been Framed! (R).
7.00 Hollyoaks (HD). 7.30 How I Met Your Mother (R,HD). Ted and Barney decide to adopt a child together.
7.00 The Simpsons (R,S). 7.30 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). Marge, Bart and Lisa taste success in the world of food blogging.
7.00 The Vicar of Dibley. Alice suggests an unconventional nativity play. 7.50 Porridge. The inmates plan a Christmas escape.
8.00 The Xtra Factor: Boys All-Time Best and Worst. Stand-out male auditions from The X Factor.
8.00 Geeks. Three magicobsessed lads visit the Greek island of Zante with a trio of female Sherlock fanatics.
8.00 Arrow (S). See Choices Above.
8.45 Only Fools and Horses. Del-Boy finds a new lady friend – only to discover she also has a son. Christmas special from 1982, starring David Jason.
9.00 Peter Andre: My Life (HD). The Australian singer tries to cram in as much work as possible with less than three months remaining before Emily’s due date, heading to Ireland to promote his new fragrances.
9.00 Rude Tube (R). Alex Zane introduces a celebration of the most popular stars to appear in online videos, including Keyboard Cat, Cassetteboy and Bizkit the Sleepwalking Dog.
9.00 Strike Back: Shadow Warfare (S,HD). Stonebridge’s health deteriorates quickly as the deadly neurotoxin takes hold, and is moved to a mysterious research facility – making it harder for Section 20 to get a cure to him.
9.20 Not Going Out. Lee has trouble bonding with his new lodger – but Tim has no such problem and discovers they have a lot in common. Meanwhile, Kate tries to persuade a dog to become a vegetarian. With Lee Mack and Megan Dodds.
6.00 FL72 Review. A roundup of recent matches, featuring all the goals from the Championship, League One and League Two. 7.00 Live World PDC Darts Championship (HD). The fourth evening of the event at the Alexandra Palace in London, where a further four first-round matches take place in the most prestigious tournament on the calendar. This time last year, James Wade marched into the second round with a straight-sets defeat of Peter Hudson, and Mark Webster put 12 months of disappointment behind him with victory over Ian White. Plus, coverage of a preliminary-round fixture.
10.00 Celebrity Juice: Christmas Special (R,HD). Festive edition of the comedy quiz, featuring Kelly Brook, Olly Murs, Peter Andre, Vanessa White, Jason Byrne, Kim Wilde and James Blunt. Last in the series.
7.00 Great Movie Mistakes 2013 (S). 7.30 Top Gear (R,S). 8.30 Snog, Marry, Avoid? Christmas Special (R,S). A festive-themed edition of the makeover show. 9.00 Don’t Tell the Bride: Christmas on the Slopes (S). A wedding ceremony on the Swiss Alps. 10.00 Russell Howard’s Good News (R,S). 10.30 EastEnders (R,S). 11.00 Family Guy (R,S). 11.25 Family Guy (R,S). 11.50 American Dad! (R,S). 12.10 American Dad! 12.30 The Revolution Will Be Televised (R,S). 1.00 Sweat the Small Stuff (R,S). 1.30 Russell Howard’s Good News (R,S). 2.00 Him & Her: The Wedding (R,S). 2.30 The Revolution Will Be Televised (R,S). 3.00 Don’t Tell the Bride: Christmas on the Slopes (R,S).
7.00 Battlefield Britain (R). Boudicca’s revolt against the Romans. 8.00 Whatever Happened to the Likely Lads? (R). Bob wallows in self-pity. 8.30 Only Connect. Victoria Coren Mitchell presents the second semifinal. 9.00 Shipwrecks: Britain’s Sunken History. The development of the “women and children first” protocol. Last in the series. 10.00 Don’t Ever Wipe Tears Without Gloves. 11.00 Patisserie with Michel Roux Jr (R). 12.00 The Joy of (Train) Sets: The Model Railway Story (R). 1.00 Battlefield Britain (R). 2.00 Only Connect (R). 2.30 Whatever Happened to the Likely Lads? (R). 3.00 Shipwrecks: Britain’s Sunken History (R).
10.00 The Royle Family. 10.00 Banshee (R,S). Mr 10.00 Made in Chelsea. Festive comedy from Rabbit offers to leave Jamie refuses to give up 2010. The couch-potato Carrie and her family on his relationship with clan invite neighbours alone if she delivers her Lucy as he returns Joe and Cheryl over for former partner-in-crime heartbroken from South Christmas dinner – but to him and Hood deals Africa, while Binky and they do not bank on the with a mixed martial arts Alex – who grew closer recently deceased Mary fighter who raped a than ever on safari – turning up too. waitress. feel pressured to declare their love for each other.
11.05 The Big Bang Theory 11.00 Knocked Up (HD) (R,HD). Raj’s parents set (2007). An ambitious him up on a blind date. journalist unexpectedly becomes pregnant after 11.35 The Big Bang Theory a one-night stand with a (R,HD). An invitation to directionless layabout. a physics conference Romantic comedy, with causes conflict. Seth Rogen. ●●●●
11.05 Spartacus: Vengeance (R,S,HD). Gladiator Spartacus contemplates taking revenge on the man who condemned his wife to death.
11.15 Harry Enfield and Chums. First-ever episode of the comedy sketch show. 11.55 Not Going Out. Sitcom, starring Lee Mack and Megan Dodds.
1.35 Totally Bonkers Guinness World Records (R,HD). The world’s largest hot dog. Matt Edmondson narrates. 2.00 Life’s Funniest Moments (R). Video clips of hilariously candid moments captured on camera. 2.25 Teleshopping. 5.55 ITV2 Nightscreen (HD).
12.20 Spartacus: Vengeance (R,S,HD). 1.35 Brit Cops: Frontline Crime UK (R,S). 2.35 Road Wars (R,S). 3.00 Brit Cops: Frontline Crime UK (R,S,HD). 4.00 Dog the Bounty Hunter (R,S). 4.30 Dog the Bounty Hunter (R,S). 5.00 Airline (R,S,HD). 5.30 Airline (R,S,HD).
12.35 The Comic Strip Presents: Mr Jolly Lives Next Door. Two would-be male escorts are mistaken for hitmen. 1.30 The Royle Family. The clan gathers for another uneventful Christmas Day. 2.25 Harry Enfield and Chums. First-ever episode of the sketch show.
12.00 2 Broke Girls (R,HD). 12.30 2 Broke Girls (R,HD). 1.00 Suburgatory (R,HD). 1.30 Rules of Engagement (R,HD). 1.55 Rude Tube (R). 2.50 The Cleveland Show (R,HD). 3.10 The Cleveland Show (R,HD). 3.30 Bob’s Burgers (R,HD). 3.55 Glee (R,HD). 4.35 Ugly Betty (R,HD).
Radio 1 6.30am The Radio 1 Breakfast Show with Nick Grimshaw 10.00 Fearne Cotton 12.45pm Newsbeat 1.00 Scott Mills 4.00 Greg James 7.00 Zane’s Hottest 100 9.00 Radio 1’s Stories 10.00 Phil Taggart and Alice Levine Midnight Rock Show with Daniel P Carter 2.00 B.Traits 4.00 Dev Radio 2 5.00am Vanessa Feltz 6.30 Chris Evans 9.30 Ken Bruce Noon Jeremy Vine 2.00 Steve Wright in the Afternoon 5.00 Simon Mayo 7.00 Paul Jones. The best of the current blues scene. 8.00 Jo Whiley. Music and chat. 10.00 The Soul of Tamla Motown 11.00 Russell Davies With Midnight Janice Long 2.00 Alex Lester
Radio 3 6.30am Breakfast 9.00 Essential Classics Noon Composer of the Week 70th Anniversary Special: Louise Farrenc 1.00 News 1.02 Radio 3 Lunchtime Concert 2.00 Afternoon on 3 4.30 In Tune 6.30 Composer of the Week 70th Anniversary Special: Louise Farrenc 7.30 Radio 3 Live in Concert: Temple Winter Festival 10.00 Night Waves 10.45 The Essay: Let There Be Dark 11.00 Jazz on 3 12.30am Through the Night Radio 4 5.30am (LW) Test Match Special 5.30 (FM) News Briefing 5.43 (FM) Prayer for the Day 5.45 (FM) Farming Today 5.58 (FM) Tweet of the Day 6.00 (FM) Today
9.00 (FM) Start the Week 9.45 (LW) Daily Service 9.45 (FM) Book of the Week: Darling Monster 10.00 (LW) Test Match Special 10.00 (FM) Woman’s Hour 10.30 (LW) Woman’s Hour 11.00 David Attenborough: My Life in Sound 11.30 Ed Reardon’s Week Noon News 12.01 (LW) Shipping Forecast 12.04 You and Yours 12.57 Weather 1.00 The World at One 1.45 A Cause for Caroling 2.00 The Archers 2.15 Afternoon Drama: Borgen – Outside the Castle 3.00 Brain of Britain 3.30 The Food Programme 4.00 Derry, Mostar and the Conquest of Happiness 4.30 The Infinite Monkey Cage 5.00 PM 5.54 (LW) Shipping Forecast 5.57 Weather
6.00 Six O’Clock News 6.30 I’m Sorry I Haven’t a Clue 7.00 The Archers 7.15 Front Row 7.45 Roddy Doyle’s The Snapper 8.00 Whatever Happened to Community? Giles Fraser asks whether there are ways of saving the traditional sense of community. Last in the series. 8.30 Crossing Continents. Indonesia’s new health insurance scheme. 9.00 Shared Planet 9.30 Start the Week 9.59 Weather 10.00 The World Tonight 10.45 Book at Bedtime: Aunts Aren’t Gentlemen 11.00 Curlew River 11.30 Today in Parliament Midnight News and Weather 12.30 Book of the Week: Darling Monster 12.48 Shipping Forecast 1.00 As BBC World Service
12.00 SPFL Round-Up (HD). 12.30 FL72 Review. A round-up of recent matches. 1.30 Soccer AM: The Best Bits (HD). Highlights of Saturday’s show. 2.30 SPFL RoundUp (HD). 3.00 FL72 Review. 4.00 Soccer AM: The Best Bits (HD). 5.00 SPFL Round-Up (HD). 5.30 The Fantasy Football Club (HD). 2.00 (LW) Test Match Special 5.20 Shipping Forecast Radio 5 Live 5.00am Morning Reports 5.30 Wake Up to Money 6.00 The Ashes: Breakfast 10.00 Victoria Derbyshire Noon Shelagh Fogarty 2.00 Richard Bacon 4.00 5 Live Drive 7.00 5 Live Sport: The Monday Night Club. Football debate with Mark Chapman. 9.00 The Ashes: The Tuffers and Vaughan Cricket Show 10.30 Phil Williams 1.00am Up All Night Classic FM 6.00am More Music Breakfast 9.00 John Suchet 1.00pm Jamie Crick 5.00 Classic FM Drive 8.00 The Full Works Concert 10.00 Smooth Classics 2.00am Nick Bailey
SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013 WEST COUNTRY LIFE 45
Tuesday television&radio Tuesday’s Television Guide TV PICKS
LAST TANGO IN HALIFAX 9pm, BBC1
Caroline is stunned to learn that Kate is pregnant, and as if that wasn’t enough for her to take, John also has shocking news.
6.00 Breakfast (S,HD). 9.15 Heir Hunters (R,S,HD). 10.00 Homes Under the Hammer (S,HD). 11.00 Caught Red Handed (R,S,HD). 11.30 Helicopter Heroes (S,HD). 12.15 Bargain Hunt (R,S). 1.00 BBC News; Weather (S,HD). 1.30 Regional News (S); Weather. 1.45 Perfection (S,HD). 2.30 Escape to the Country (R,S). 3.30 Christmas Kitchen with James Martin (S,HD). 4.15 Flog It! (R,S,HD). 5.15 Pointless (R,S,HD).
FILM RATINGS ●●●●● Excellent ●●●● Very good ●●● Good ●● Average ● Poor
HEBBURN 10pm, BBC2
Sarah has more than being a new mum to celebrate when she passes her PhD and is offered her dream job in Zurich, leaving her and Jack to decide between her career and family. Vicki wonders if her new boyfriend Lindsay is such a perfect man after all, while a heartbroken Gervaise launches his album at Swayze’s.
6.00 This Is BBC Two 6.35 Homes Under the Hammer 7.35 Helicopter Heroes 8.20 Sign Zone: The A to Z of TV Cooking 9.05 Sign Zone: Antiques Roadshow 10.05 Sign Zone: Britain’s Empty Homes 10.35 HARDtalk 11.00 BBC News 11.30 BBC World News 12.00 Daily Politics 1.00 The Super League Show 2.00 Cash in the Attic 2.45 Madagascar 3.45 Cagney & Lacey 4.30 Are You Being Served? 5.00 ‘Allo ‘Allo! 5.30 Priceless Antiques Roadshow
THE GREAT BRITISH BAKE OFF CHRISTMAS SPECIAL 8pm, BBC2
THE LOCKERBIE BOMBING 11pm, ITV
On December 21, 1988, Pan Am Flight 103 exploded in the skies over Scotland, killing all 259 people on board and a further 11 on the ground in the town of Lockerbie. Twenty-five years after the atrocity, this documentary tells the story of the worst terrorist attack, hearing from eyewitnesses and those affected.
Mary Berry and Paul Hollywood demonstrate how to make a number of festive treats, including stollen and mincemeat streusel.
6.00 Daybreak (S,HD). 8.30 Lorraine (S). 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,S). 10.30 This Morning (S). 12.30 Let’s Do Christmas with Gino & Mel (S). 1.30 ITV News and Weather (S). 1.55 Regional News (S). 2.00 Peter Andre’s 60 Minute Makeover (S,HD). 3.00 Dickinson’s Real Deal (S,HD). From Oldham, Greater Manchester. 3.59 Regional Weather (S). 4.00 Show Me the Telly (S,HD). 5.00 The Chase (R,S,HD).
Channel Channel 4
6.10 According to Jim (R,S,HD). 7.05 Will & Grace (R,S). 7.55 Everybody Loves Raymond (R,S). 8.55 Frasier (R,S). 10.00 Ruth Watson Means Business! (S,HD). 11.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 12.00 Come Dine with Me (R,S,HD). 2.10 Phil Spencer: Secret Agent (S,HD). 3.10 Countdown (S,HD). 4.00 Deal or No Deal (S,HD). High-stakes game show, with Noel Edmonds. 5.00 Four in a Bed (S,HD). 5.30 Come Dine With Me Christmas (S,HD).
Channel Channel 5
6.00 Milkshake!. 9.45 Inside Hollywood. 9.50 Paul Merton in Europe (R,S). 10.45 Inside Hollywood (R). 10.50 Eddie Stobart: Trucks and Trailers. 11.50 Stop! Police Interceptors (R,S). 12.50 5 News Lunchtime. 12.55 Neighbours (S,HD). 1.25 Chinese Food in Minutes (R,S). 1.30 Film: A Star for Christmas (S,HD) (2012). ●●● 3.15 Film: Gifts for Christmas (S,HD) (2010). ●●● 5.00 5 News at 5 (S,HD). 5.30 Neighbours (R,S,HD).
(R) repeat (S) subtitles (HD) highdefinition
6.00 Celebrity Eggheads (S,HD). 7/10. 6.30 Strictly Come Dancing – It Takes Two (S,HD). 57/60. Karen Hardy gives her thoughts on the semi-final choreography. 7.00 The Great British Sewing Bee Christmas Special (R,S,HD). Judges Patrick Grant and May Advice on making gifts and decorations.
6.00 Regional News (S); Weather. 6.30 ITV News and Weather (S).
6.00 The Simpsons (S,HD). 23/23. 6.30 Hollyoaks (S,HD). Nancy comes to blows with Sienna after finding her snooping around her flat.
6.00 The Dog Rescuers (R,S,HD). 2/10. Two Norwich RSPCA officers rescue a dog trapped on a small island. 6.30 NewsTalk Live (S,HD).
7.00 Emmerdale (S,HD). Moira is left unsettled when Zak questions James’s intentions. 7.30 Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire (S,HD) (2005). The adolescent wizard is unexpectedly chosen to represent Hogwarts School in a prestigious magical tournament, despite being legally too young to enter. He joins champions of three magical academies to face deadly monsters in a series of challenges. Meanwhile, the followers of the dreaded Lord Voldemort plot to restore their master to the land of the living. Fourth instalment of the fantasy saga, starring Daniel Radcliffe, Robbie Coltrane, Ralph Fiennes, Michael Gambon, Rupert Grint, Emma Watson, Brendan Gleeson and Robert Pattinson. See Choices Above. ●●●●
7.00 News (S). 7.55 4thought.tv (S). Talks on whether people should limit the size of their families.
7.00 World’s Strongest Man 2013: Qualifiers (S,HD). Action from the Giants Live Series event in Budapest, Hungary. Followed by 5 News Update.
8.00 Location, Location, Location (R,S,HD). 4/5. Kirstie Allsopp and Phil Spencer catch up with two couples who wanted to find family homes they could live in for the rest of their lives.
8.00 Pothole Britain – Drivers Beware! (S,HD). Documentary examining why there is such a big problem with potholes in the nation’s roads. Followed by 5 News at 9.
9.00 Heston’s Great British Food (S). 2/3. Heston Blumenthal discovers the origins of the British roast and serves up beef with all the trimmings to the people who make it possible – butchers and farmers.
9.00 The Mentalist (S,HD). 8/22. See Choices Above.
10.00 Masters of Sex (S,HD). 11&12/12. Double bill. Johnson tries to help DePaul promote her work on women’s health as they travel to a medical conference, while Masters struggles to carry on the study without his partner. Later, his presentation goes down badly, igniting a protest against all his hard work that leaves Johnson struggling with the fallout. Scully tells Margaret the truth about his sexual history and Ethan looks for a new job in California. Last in the series.
10.00 Castle (S,HD). 12/24. Beckett and Castle investigate the apparent suicide of a magicshop owner who was discovered drowned in a water tank used by Harry Houdini in a famous illusion.
12.20 Poker (S). Action from the Pokerstars.com & Monte Carlo Casino Grand Final Super High Roller event. 1.20 KOTV Boxing Weekly (S). 1.45 Beach Volleyball (S). 2.40 Survival of the Fittest (R,S). 3.05 A Place in the Sun: Winter Sun (R,S,HD). 4.00 Suburgatory (S,HD). 4.20 Deal or No Deal (R,S,HD). 5.15 Countdown (R,S,HD).
12.55 SuperCasino. 3.05 Charley Boorman’s USA Adventure (R,S,HD). The actor sets off on the final leg of his journey, attempting to set a world speed record. Last in the series. 3.55 HouseBusters (R,S). 4.20 HouseBusters (R,S). 4.45 Divine Designs (R,S). St Sophia’s Church, London. 5.10 Wildlife SOS (R,S). 5.35 Michaela’s Wild Challenge (R,S).
Masters of Sex, 10pm
7.00 The One Show (S,HD). 7.30 EastEnders (S,HD). Carol spends the afternoon with David – and suggests they get a hotel room. Followed by BBC News; Regional News.
Show Me the Telly, 4pm
6.00 BBC News (S,HD); Weather. 6.30 Regional News (S); Weather.
8.00 Holby City (S,HD). 10/52. Michael puts his career on the line to deal with a heartbreaking case and Gemma makes a mistake that almost costs a patient’s life, forcing her to question her future.
8.00 The Great British Bake Off Christmas Special (S,HD). 16/16. See Choices Above.
9.00 Last Tango in Halifax (S,HD). 5/6. See Choices Above.
9.00 Pilgrimage with Simon Reeve (S,HD). 3/3. Simon travels to the holy city of Jerusalem, where he takes part in the ancient ritual of following the route taken by Jesus as He carried his cross. Last in the series.
10.00 BBC News (S,HD). 10.25 Regional News (S). Followed by National Lottery Update. 10.35 The Matt Lucas Christmas Awards (S,HD). The funnyman hands out awards in bizarre categories.
10.00 Hebburn (S,HD). 6/6. See Choices Above. 10.30 Newsnight (S,HD). Followed by Weather.
10.25 ITV News and Weather (S). 10.55 Regional News (S); Weather.
Pilgrimage with Simon Reeve, 9pm
6 7 8 9
Holby City, 8pm
11.15 Film 2013 (S,HD). 7/7. 11.45 Body Heat (S) (1981). See Choices Above. ●●●●
11.20 The Choir: Sing While You Work (R,S,HD). 7/8. Gareth Malone’s four workplace choirs perform gospel and soul songs in front of a panel of judges as they compete for three places in next week’s final.
11.00 The Lockerbie Bombing (S). See Choices Above.
1.35 Weatherview (S). 1.40 BBC News (S,HD).
12.20 Sign Zone: The Midwives (R,S). Staff at St Mary’s Hospital in Manchester who deal with high-risk pregnancies, including a woman whose baby will need a major operation just 24 hours after being born. 1.20 This Is BBC Two (S). 4.00 BBC Learning Zone: Materials: How They Work. 5.00 The Modern Monarchy (S,HD).
12.00 The Jonathan Ross Show (R,S,HD). David Beckham gives his first TV interview since retiring from football, Will Ferrell talks about Anchorman 2 and Leona Lewis performs a Christmas classic. Last in the series. 1.00 Jackpot247. Interactive gaming. 3.00 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA (S). 3.45 ITV Nightscreen (HD). 5.05 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,S).
46 WEST COUNTRY LIFE SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013
11.00 NCIS (R,S,HD). 23/24. A member of the NCIS team is targeted. 11.55 The Angel of Death: Born to Kill? (R,S,HD). 3/5. A psychological profile of child killer Beverly Allitt.
THE MENTALIST 9pm, Channel 5
Jane seeks solace in a church as he prepares to come faceto-face with Red John, the serial killer who murdered his wife and daughter and who he has spent 10 years tracking down.
THE VAMPIRE DIARIES 9pm, ITV2
Elena and Caroline decide to throw a party at Whitmore College, and Damon devises a useful method of getting Wes to answer his questions. Meanwhile, Jesse needs Caroline’s help. Supernatural drama, starring Nina Dobrev, Paul Wesley, Ian Somerhalder, Steven R McQueen and Katerina Graham.
6.00 Emmerdale 6.25 Coronation Street 7.20 You’ve Been Framed! 7.45 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 8.30 Dinner Date 9.30 The Real Housewives of New York City 10.25 The Real Housewives of New Jersey 12.25 Emmerdale 12.55 Coronation Street 1.55 The Jeremy Kyle Show 4.05 The Xtra Factor: Boys All-Time Best and Worst 5.05 Aladdin
6.00 Switched 6.25 Ugly Betty 7.10 Charmed 8.00 Glee 9.00 How I Met Your Mother 9.30 2 Broke Girls 10.00 Rude(ish) Tube 11.00 Rules of Engagement 11.30 Charmed 12.30 Hollyoaks 1.00 How I Met Your Mother 2.00 The Big Bang Theory 3.00 Rude(ish) Tube. 4.00 Rules of Engagement 5.00 How I Met Your Mother
Sky1 Sky1 6.00 Dog the Bounty Hunter (R,S). 7.00 The Middle (R,S,HD). 8.00 Stargate Atlantis (R,S,HD). 9.00 Hawaii Five-0 (R,S,HD). 10.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S,HD). 1.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S,HD). 2.00 Hawaii Five-0 (R,S,HD). 3.00 Stargate Atlantis (R,S,HD). 4.00 The Simpsons (R,S). 5.00 Futurama (R,S). 5.30 The Middle (R,S,HD).
Tuesday television&radio BODY HEAT 11.45pm, BBC1
HARRY POTTER AND THE GOBLET OF FIRE 7.30pm, ITV
Thriller starring William Hurt, Kathleen Turner, Richard Crenna, Ted Danson, Mickey Rourke, JA Preston, Kim Zimmer, Jane Hallaren and Lanna Saunders.
Gold GOLD 6.05 Ever Decreasing Circles. 6.35 Sykes. 7.05 The Brittas Empire. 7.45 The Good Life. 8.25 To the Manor Born. 9.05 Sykes. 9.40 Last of the Summer Wine. 11.40 The Bleak Old Shop of Stuff. 12.20 The Green Green Grass. 1.00 The Good Life. 1.40 To the Manor Born. 2.15 The Two Ronnies Sketchbook. 3.15 Only Fools and Horses. 3.55 Last of the Summer Wine.
Fourth instalment of the fantasy saga, starring Daniel Radcliffe, Rupert Grint, Emma Watson and Robert Pattinson.
SkySports1 Sky Sports 1 6.00 Good Morning Sports Fans (HD). 7.00 Good Morning Sports Fans (HD). 8.00 Good Morning Sports Fans (HD). 9.00 FL72 Review. 10.00 SPFL Round-Up (HD). 10.30 The Fantasy Football Club (HD). 11.00 Soccer AM: The Best Bits (HD). Highlights of Saturday’s show. 12.00 World PDC Darts Championship (HD). 5.00 Premier League Review (HD).
The Vampire Diaries, 9pm
The IT Crowd, 10pm
Karl Pilkington: The … 9pm
French and … 10.55pm
Live Football, 7.30pm
6.45 Funniest Ever You’ve Been Framed (R). Harry Hill narrates camcorder calamities.
6.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,HD). 6.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,HD). Penny volunteers to nurse Sheldon.
6.00 The Middle (R,S,HD). 6.30 The Simpsons (R,S). Bart is befriended by mobsters.
6.00 Ricky Tomlinson: Sitcom Does Christmas. The Royle Family star presents classic Christmas sitcom moments.
6.00 Revista De La Liga (HD). Highlights from La Liga.
7.30 You’ve Been Framed! (R). Comical clips, narrated by Harry Hill.
7.00 Hollyoaks (HD). 7.30 How I Met Your Mother (R,HD). Lily and Marshall’s housewarming party ends in chaos.
7.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 7.30 The Simpsons (R,S). Blood-curdling tales of terror.
7.00 Keeping Up Appearances. Hyacinth goes on a cruise on the QE2.
8.00 The Xtra Factor: Girls All-Time Best and Worst. The team takes a look back at some of the most memorable female contestants of the past decade.
8.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,HD). Sheldon invites a famous physicist to the flat. 8.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,HD). Sheldon is hurt when Professor Proton contacts Leonard.
8.00 All Aboard: East Coast Trains (S,HD). Staff prepare for the busy Easter weekend, and police have to intervene at Newcastle station to deal with four rowdy passengers.
8.15 Only Fools and Horses. Del gets his hands on a consignment of selfinflating rubber dolls, which turn out to be filled with explosive gas. David Jason and Nicholas Lyndhurst star.
9.00 The Vampire Diaries (HD). See Choices Above.
9.00 Rules of Engagement (HD). Jeff discovers Brenda’s pregnancy is making her incontinent. 9.30 Rules of Engagement (HD). Brenda goes into labour on Jen and Adam’s wedding day, Last in the series.
9.00 Karl Pilkington: The Moaning of Life (S,HD). Karl ends his journey with a look at differing attitudes to death. In Ghana, he attends his first-ever funeral and the accompanying parade.
9.20 Not Going Out. Lee has to leave the flat when he gets a job as a caretaker, prompting Kate to look for new housemates. Meanwhile, Tim tries to revive his relationship with his ex-girlfriend.
7.00 Sportswomen (HD). 7.30 Live Capital One Cup Football (HD). Sunderland v Chelsea (Kick-off 7.45pm). Coverage of the quarterfinal at the Stadium of Light, as the clubs meet for the second time this season. The Blues visited the Black Cats earlier this month for a league fixture, and will be hoping to add to the difficulties facing Sunderland boss Gus Poyet, who first came to prominence in this country while playing for Chelsea in 1997.
10.00 Outnumbered. The 10.00 Revolution (R,S,HD). 10.00 Revista De La Liga 10.00 The IT Crowd (R). Jen Brockmans’ plans for a Charlie and Monroe join (HD). Scott Minto deals with a difficult festive holiday grind to a forces, while Rachel and presents highlights of builder. halt. Gene struggle to pick up the latest La Liga 10.30 The IT Crowd (R). Roy the pieces and move on. 10.55 French and Saunders matches in Spain, and Moss revel in their Aaron and Cynthia have featuring the likes of Easter Special. The masculinity when they a run-in with Dr Horn, Barcelona and Real comedy duo’s own discover a new football and Neville receives a Madrid. version of The Lord of website, but the illusion surprise. the Rings. does not last long. 11.50 Not Going Out. Lee 11.00 The Big Bang Theory 11.00 NCIS: Los Angeles gets a job. (R,HD). Penny appears in (R,S,HD). Deeks goes a musical. Johnny undercover to befriend a Galecki star. female diamond thief being targeted by an 11.30 The Big Bang Theory arms dealer. (R,HD).
11.00 Premier League Review (HD). A look back at recent fixtures in the English Premier League.
12.00 Tricked: Favourite Tricks (R,HD). Magician Ben Hanlin looks back at highlights from the series, including his pranks on the public and his most popular celebrity tricks. 1.00 The Vampire Diaries (R,HD). 1.50 Life’s Funniest Moments (R). 2.15 Teleshopping. 5.45 ITV2 Nightscreen (HD).
12.00 2 Broke Girls (R,HD). 1.00 Rude Tube: Total Stunts (R). The 50 most dangerous stunts on the internet. 2.00 The IT Crowd (R). 2.25 The IT Crowd (R). 2.50 The Cleveland Show (R,HD). 3.10 The Cleveland Show (R,HD). 3.35 Glee (R,HD). 4.20 Ugly Betty (R,HD).
12.00 Capital One Cup Football (HD). 1.00 Football Gold (S). 1.15 Football Gold (S). 1.30 Football Asia (S). 2.00 Revista De La Liga (HD). 3.00 Premier League Review (HD). 4.00 Capital One Cup Football (HD). 5.00 Revista De La Liga (HD). Highlights from La Liga.
10.00 American Pie: The Wedding (HD) (2003). The friends from East Great Falls High reunite to celebrate Jim and Michelle’s forthcoming wedding. Though reluctant to invite Stifler to their big day, the happy couple relent – but regret their decision when he plans a bachelor party on the same evening Jim is due to meet the in-laws. Comedy sequel, with Jason Biggs and Alyson Hannigan. ●●●
Radio 1 6.30am The Radio 1 Breakfast Show with Nick Grimshaw 10.00 Fearne Cotton 12.45pm Newsbeat 1.00 Scott Mills 4.00 Greg James 7.00 Zane’s Hottest 100 9.00 The Review Show with Edith Bowman 10.00 Phil Taggart and Alice Levine Midnight Mike Davies Radio 2 5.00am Vanessa Feltz 6.30 Chris Evans 9.30 Ken Bruce Noon Jeremy Vine 2.00 Steve Wright in the Afternoon 5.00 Simon Mayo 7.00 Jamie Cullum 8.00 Jo Whiley 10.00 The Soul of Stax 11.00 Mark Radcliffe’s Music Club Midnight Janice Long Radio 3 6.30am Breakfast 9.00 Essential Classics Noon Composer of the Week 70th Anniversary Special
12.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S,HD). An unlikely allegiance is formed. 1.00 Brit Cops: Frontline Crime UK (R,S,HD). 2.00 Cop Squad (R,S). 3.00 Brit Cops: Frontline Crime UK (R,S,HD). 4.00 Dog the Bounty Hunter (R,S). 4.30 Dog the Bounty Hunter (R,S). 5.00 Airline (R,S,HD). 5.30 Airline (R,S,HD).
1.00 News 1.02 Radio 3 Lunchtime Concert 2.00 Afternoon on 3 4.30 In Tune 6.30 Composer of the Week 70th Anniversary Special: Louise Farrenc 7.30 Radio 3 Live in Concert: Temple Winter Festival 10.00 Night Waves 10.45 The Essay: Let There Be Dark 11.00 Late Junction 12.30am Through the Night Radio 4 5.30am (LW) Test Match Special 5.30 (FM) News Briefing 5.43 (FM) Prayer for the Day 5.45 (FM) Farming Today 5.58 (FM) Tweet of the Day 6.00 (FM) Today 8.31 (LW) Yesterday in Parliament 9.00 (LW) Test Match Special 9.00 (FM) The Making of the Modern Arab World 9.45 (LW) Daily Service 9.45 (FM) Book of the Week
12.30 The Comic Strip Presents: Didn’t You Kill My Brother? A man with more than 200 university degrees is released from prison, and tries to track down the brother he thinks was responsible for framing him. Comedy, starring Alexei Sayle. 1.30 French and Saunders Easter Special. 2.10 dinnerladies.
10.00 (LW) Test Match Special 10.00 (FM) Woman’s Hour 10.30 (LW) Woman’s Hour 11.00 Shared Planet 11.30 Soul Music Noon News 12.01 (LW) Shipping Forecast 12.04 Call You and Yours 12.57 Weather 1.00 The World at One 1.45 A Cause for Caroling 2.00 The Archers 2.15 Afternoon Drama: Borgen – Outside the Castle 3.00 The Kitchen Cabinet 3.30 The Shared Experience 4.00 Word of Mouth 4.30 Great Lives 5.00 PM 5.54 (LW) Shipping Forecast 6.00 Six O’Clock News 6.30 That Mitchell and Webb Sound 7.00 The Archers 7.15 Front Row 7.45 Roddy Doyle’s The Snapper 8.00 Lines in the Sand 8.40 In Touch
9.00 All in the Mind. Psychologist Claudia Hammond and Harvard University’s Michael Norton investigate why some people believe performing certain rituals before eating makes food taste better. 9.30 The Making of the Modern Arab World. Author Tarek Osman continues his look at the ideas that have shaped the modern Arab world by investigating Arab nationalism. 9.59 Weather 10.00 The World Tonight 10.45 Book at Bedtime: Aunts Aren’t Gentlemen 11.00 The Infinite Monkey Cage 11.30 Today in Parliament Midnight News and Weather 12.30 Book of the Week: Darling Monster 12.48 Shipping
7.00 Winter Wipeout (R,S). 8.00 Gavin & Stacey (R,S). 8.30 Gavin & Stacey (R,S). 9.00 The Call Centre Christmas (S). The staff enjoy a festive atmosphere in Swansea’s third largest call centre. 10.00 Bad Education Christmas Special (S). Mr Fraser appoints Alfie as director for the Christmas production. 10.30 EastEnders (R,S). 11.00 Family Guy (R,S). 11.25 Family Guy (R,S). 11.50 American Dad! (R,S). Stan buys a racehorse to raise money. 12.10 American Dad! (R,S). 12.30 Bad Education Christmas Special (R,S). 1.00 The Call Centre Christmas (R,S). 2.00 The Revolution Will Be Televised (R,S). 2.30 Snow, Sex and Suspicious Parents (R,S). 3.30 Bad Education Christmas Special (R,S).
7.00 Battlefield Britain (R). The Battle of Hastings. 8.00 Orbit: Earth’s Extraordinary Journey (R). 9.00 New Hidden Killers: The Edwardian Home. Part two of two. Mishaps caused by early electrical equipment. 10.00 Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy (R). Smiley gains all the information he needs. 10.40 Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy (R). Smiley tries to flush out the mole. Last in the series. 11.25 Byzantium: A Tale of Three Cities (R). The last centuries of Christian Constantinople. 12.25 Orbit: Earth’s Extraordinary Journey (R). 1.25 Battlefield Britain (R). 2.25 New Hidden Killers: The Edwardian Home (R).
1.00 As BBC World Service 5.20 Shipping Forecast Radio 5 Live 5.00am Morning Reports 5.30 Wake Up to Money 6.00 The Ashes: Breakfast 10.00 Victoria Derbyshire Noon Shelagh Fogarty 2.00 Richard Bacon 4.00 5 Live Drive 7.00 5 Live Sport 7.45 5 Live Sport: League Cup Football 2013-14 10.30 Phil Williams 1.00am Up All Night Classic FM 6.00am More Music Breakfast 9.00 John Suchet 1.00pm Jamie Crick 5.00 Classic FM Drive 8.00 The Full Works Concert 10.00 Smooth Classics. Margherita Taylor presents a selection of music for the late evening and early morning. 2.00am Nick Bailey
SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013 WEST COUNTRY LIFE 47
Wednesday television&radio Wednesday’s Television Guide FOOD & DRINK CHRISTMAS SPECIAL 8pm, BBC2
Michel Roux Jr and Kate Goodman are joined by Mary Berry and Glynn Purnell to create the perfect yuletide feast.
6.00 Breakfast (S,HD). 9.15 Heir Hunters (R,S,HD). 10.00 Homes Under the Hammer (R,S,HD). 11.00 Caught Red Handed (R,S,HD). 11.30 Helicopter Heroes (S,HD). 12.15 Bargain Hunt (R,S). 1.00 BBC News; Weather (S,HD). 1.30 Regional News (S); Weather. 1.45 Perfection (S,HD). 2.30 Escape to the Country (R,S). 3.30 Christmas Kitchen with James Martin (S,HD). 4.15 Flog It! (S,HD). 5.15 Pointless (R,S,HD).
FILM RATINGS ●●●●● Excellent ●●●● Very good ●●● Good ●● Average ● Poor
THE GREAT TRAIN ROBBERY 8pm, BBC1
Two-part drama by Broadchurch writer Chris Chibnall telling the story of the most infamous heist in British history, beginning with the planning and execution of the crime from the perspective of the perpetrators themselves. Luke Evans, Paul Anderson, Martin Compston, Jack Roth and Neil Maskell star.
6.00 This Is BBC Two 6.30 Homes Under the Hammer 7.30 Helicopter Heroes 8.15 Sign Zone: The A to Z of TV Cooking 9.00 Great Continental Railway Journeys 10.00 Ronnie’s Animal Crackers 10.30 See Hear 11.00 BBC News 11.30 Daily Politics 1.00 One Man and His Campervan 1.30 Fred Dibnah’s Age of Steam 2.00 Cash in the Attic 2.45 Madagascar 3.45 Cagney & Lacey 4.30 Are You Being Served? 5.00 ‘Allo ‘Allo! 5.30 Priceless Antiques Roadshow
SURPRISE SURPRISE 8pm, ITV
Britney Spears transforms into a butler at the Savoy, a 91-year-old man joins Torvill and Dean on the ice and Olly Murs performs in the studio. Holly Willoughby presents.
6.00 Daybreak (S,HD). 8.30 Lorraine (S). 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,S). 10.30 This Morning (S). 12.30 Let’s Do Christmas with Gino & Mel (S). 1.30 ITV News and Weather (S). 1.55 Regional News (S). 2.00 Peter Andre’s 60 Minute Makeover (S,HD). 3.00 Dickinson’s Real Deal (S,HD). From Coalville in Leicestershire. 3.59 Regional Weather (S). 4.00 Show Me the Telly (S,HD). 5.00 The Chase (R,S,HD).
LUCAN 9pm, ITV
Conclusion of Jeff Pope’s two-part drama based on the life of flamboyant aristocrat Lord Lucan. With the body of nanny Sandra Rivett in the basement of his family home, Lucan attacks his wife Veronica, but she fights back and alerts the police. Starring Rory Kinnear and Christopher Eccleston.
Channel Channel 4
6.00 The Treacle People (R,S). 6.15 According to Jim (R,S,HD). 7.05 Will & Grace (R,S). 7.55 Everybody Loves Raymond (R,S). 9.00 Frasier (R,S). 10.00 Ruth Watson Means Business! (S,HD). 11.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 12.00 Come Dine with Me (R,S,HD). 2.10 Phil Spencer: Secret Agent (S,HD). 3.10 Countdown (S,HD). 4.00 Deal or No Deal (S,HD). 5.00 Four in a Bed (S,HD). 5.30 Come Dine with Me Christmas (S,HD).
Channel Channel 5
6.00 Milkshake! 9.45 Inside Hollywood. 9.50 Paul Merton in Europe (R,S). 10.50 Eddie Stobart: Trucks and Trailers (R,S,HD). 11.50 Secrets of the Vanishing Sphinx (R,S,HD). 12.50 5 News Lunchtime (S,HD). 12.55 Neighbours (S,HD). 1.25 Chinese Food in Minutes (R,S). 1.30 Film: The Real St Nick (S,HD) (2012). ●●● 3.10 Film: Mrs Santa Claus (S) (1996). ●●● 5.00 5 News at 5 (S,HD). 5.30 Neighbours (R,S,HD).
(R) repeat (S) subtitles (HD) highdefinition
6.00 Celebrity Eggheads (S,HD). 8/10. With Tom O’Connor, Syd Little, Roy Walker, Mick Miller and Johnnie Casson. 6.30 Strictly Come Dancing – It Takes Two (S,HD). 58/60. 7.00 Wartime Farm Christmas Special (R,S,HD). Rural life during the Christmas of 1944.
6.00 Regional News (S); Weather. 6.30 ITV News and Weather (S).
6.00 The Simpsons (R,S). 1/20. With the voice of Lionel Richie. 6.30 Hollyoaks (S,HD). Patrick worries he may have lost Sienna for good.
6.00 The Dog Rescuers (R,S,HD). 3/10. Sara Hughes visits the home of a malnourished dog. 6.30 NewsTalk Live (S,HD).
7.00 Emmerdale (S,HD). Charity is thrown when Jai hands her divorce papers. 7.30 Coronation Street (S,HD). Carla catches Tina and Rob kissing passionately.
7.00 News (S). 7.55 4thought.tv (S). Talks on whether people should limit the size of their families.
7.00 World’s Strongest Man 2013: Qualifiers (S,HD). Action from the Giants Live Series event in Leeds. Followed by 5 News Update.
World’s Strongest Man 2013 … 7pm
Obsessive Compulsive … 8pm
7.00 The One Show (S,HD). The live magazine show featuring topical reports from around the UK and big-name studio guests. Followed by BBC News; Regional News.
Coronation Street, 7.30pm
6.00 BBC News (S,HD); Weather. 6.30 Regional News (S); Weather.
8.00 The Great Train Robbery (S,HD). 1/2.See Choices Above.
8.00 Food & Drink Christmas Special (S). See Choices Above.
8.00 Surprise Surprise (S,HD). See Choices Above.
8.00 Obsessive Compulsive Cleaners (S). 8/8. See Choices Above.
8.00 Excessive Compulsive Collectors (S,HD). Documentary examining the world’s most extreme and unusual collectors, including a woman who has amassed 2,000 pairs of shoes. Followed by 5 News at 9.
9.30 Mrs Brown’s Boys (R,S,HD). 1/2. Agnes faces her busiest Christmas ever, taking on the task of staging a nativity play at the community centre, while Buster and Dermot compete to play Santa in the Grotto. Part two can be seen tomorrow.
9.00 Tudor Monastery Farm (S,HD). 6/6. Ruth Goodman, Peter Ginn and Tom Pinfold bring in the barley and celebrate with a harvest feast, before reflecting on their experiences as they prepare to leave. Last in the series.
9.00 Lucan (S,HD). 2/2. See Choices Above.
9.00 24 Hours in A&E (S,HD). 6/6. Doctors are concerned a 38-year-old woman may be paralysed, while a 19-year-old veterinary student is rushed in after being involved in a headon car crash. Last in the series.
9.00 Britain’s Craziest Christmas Lights (S,HD). See Choices Above.
10.00 The Terminator (S,HD) (1984). A cyborg assassin is sent on a murderous mission back in time to the 20th century, where he wreaks havoc while searching for his intended victim – a woman whose unborn son is destined to lead the human race in a war against machines. However, a soldier has also been sent from the future to protect her. James Cameron’s sci-fi thriller, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Linda Hamilton and Michael Biehn. See Choices Above. ●●●●●
10.00 BBC News (S,HD). 10.25 Regional News (S). Followed by National Lottery Update. 10.35 A Question of Sport (S,HD). 8/36. With Ian Thorpe, Ryan Sidebottom, Tim Visser and Sarah Storey.
10.00 The Sarah Millican Television Programme Christmas Special (R,S,HD). With Hugh Bonneville and Shane Richie. 10.30 Newsnight (S,HD). Presented by Jeremy Paxman. Followed by Weather.
10.30 ITV News and Weather (S).
10.00 Gogglebox (S). 13/13. Weekly TV review programme. Last in the series. 10.45 Jimmy Carr: Being Funny (R,S). The 8 Out of 10 Cats host, known for his slick one-liners and acerbic wit, performs a fast-paced stand-up comedy gig at Birmingham’s Symphony Hall.
6 7 8 9
A Question of Sport, 10.35pm
11.05 The League Cup Show (S,HD). Highlights of the quarter-finals. 11.55 Black Death (S,HD) (2010). Medieval thriller, starring Sean Bean, Eddie Redmayne and Carice van Houten. ●●●
11.20 The Silent War (R,S,HD). 2/2. Part two of two. British, American and Soviet submarine crews reveal how the nuclear arms race took ballistic missiles beneath the Arctic ice and nearly ended in disaster at sea.
11.00 Regional News (S); Weather. 11.10 Smokin’ Aces (S,HD) (2007). See Choices Above. ●●
11.50 Man Down (R,S,HD). 6/6. Brian is nominated for a business award and Dan must quickly find a tuxedo and a date to impress his ex. Comedy, starring Greg Davies, Mike Wozniak, Rik Mayall and Roison Conaty.
1.30 Weatherview (S). 1.35 BBC News (S,HD).
12.20 Sign Zone: See Hear (R,S). Memnos Costi and Ahmed Mudawi’s all-time favourite Christmas-themed sign-songs, plus a chance to see the popular festive drama Grandad, which is featured as a tribute to Hal Draper, who died last year. With voiceover. 12.50 This Is BBC Two (S). Preview of upcoming programmes from BBC Two. 3.50 BBC Learning Zone
1.05 Jackpot247 Interactive gaming. 1.50 Film: Spartacus (S,HD) (1960). A gladiator leads an army of escaped slaves in a rebellion against the Roman state. Stanley Kubrick’s Oscar-winning epic, starring Kirk Douglas, Laurence Olivier and Tony Curtis. ●●●●● 5.00 ITV Nightscreen (HD). Textbased information service. 5.05 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,S).
12.20 Film: A Field in England (S,HD) (2013). Civil War horror, starring Reece Shearsmith and Michael Smiley. ●●● 1.55 Film: Black Narcissus (S,HD) (1947). Drama, starring Deborah Kerr. ●●●●● 3.45 Suburgatory (S,HD). 4.05 Deal or No Deal (R,S,HD). 5.00 Countdown (R,S,HD). 5.45 Baking Mad with Eric Lanlard (R,S,HD).
48 WEST COUNTRY LIFE SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013
12.15 The Big Game (S,HD). Action from the poker game in which amateurs compete alongside world-class professionals and some of the legends of the game. 1.10 SuperCasino 3.05 Myra: Murder, Lies and Manipulation (R,S,HD). 3.55 HouseBusters (R,S). 4.45 Divine Designs (R,S). 5.10 Wildlife SOS (R,S). 5.35 Michaela’s Wild Challenge (R,S).
BRITAIN’S CRAZIEST CHRISTMAS LIGHTS 9pm, Channel 5
OBSESSIVE COMPULSIVE CLEANERS 8pm, Channel 4
Noddy Holder narrates a documentary following four households as they transform their homes into electric winter wonderlands with extensive displays of festive illuminations.
Mother-of-six Alison, 45, spends more than 30 hours a week keeping her five-bedroom Lincolnshire home immaculate. She heads to Waltham Cross in Hertfordshire to help 61-year-old Wild West fan Dusty Rhodes, whose terraced house has not been deepcleaned for more than 10 years.
6.00 Emmerdale 6.25 The Cube 7.20 You’ve Been Framed! (R). 7.45 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 8.30 Dinner Date 9.30 Real Housewives of New York City 10.25 The Xtra Factor: Girls All-Time Best and Worst 11.25 Aladdin 1.00 Emmerdale 1.30 You’ve Been Framed! (R). 2.00 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R). 4.10 The Xtra Factor: Girls All-Time Best and Worst (R). 5.15 Jack and the Beanstalk (R).
6.00 Switched (R). 6.25 Ugly Betty (R,HD). 7.10 Charmed (R). 8.00 Glee 9.00 How I Met Your Mother (R,HD). 9.30 2 Broke Girls (R,HD). 10.00 Rude(ish) Tube (R). 11.00 Rules of Engagement (R,HD). 11.30 Charmed (R). 12.30 Hollyoaks (R,HD). 1.00 How I Met Your Mother (R,HD). 2.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,HD). 3.00 Rude(ish) Tube. 4.00 Rules of Engagement (R,HD). 5.00 How I Met Your Mother (R,HD).
Sky1 Sky1 6.00 Dog the Bounty Hunter (R,S). 6.30 Dog the Bounty Hunter (R,S). 7.00 The Middle (R,S,HD). 8.00 Stargate Atlantis (R,S,HD). 9.00 Hawaii Five-0 (R,S,HD). 10.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S,HD). 2.00 Hawaii Five-0 (R,S,HD). 3.00 Stargate Atlantis (R,S,HD). 4.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 5.00 Futurama (R,S). 5.30 The Middle (R,S,HD).
Wednesday television&radio SMOKIN’ ACES 11.10pm, ITV
THE TERMINATOR 10pm, Channel 5
A Las Vegas magician agrees to become an FBI informant, but finds himself the target of a motley crew of assassins. Crime drama, starring Jeremy Piven.
Gold GOLD 6.00 Sykes 6.30 The Brittas Empire 7.10 Sykes 7.50 The Brittas Empire 8.30 The Bleak Old Shop of Stuff 9.10 The Green Green Grass 9.50 Last of the Summer Wine 11.55 The Green Green Grass 12.35 The Good Life 1.15 To the Manor Born 1.50 Keeping Up Appearances 3.05 Only Fools and Horses 4.15 Last of the Summer Wine.
A cyborg from the future is sent back in time to kill a woman whose unborn son is destined to save the human race. Sci-fi, with Arnold Schwarzenegger.
SkySports1 Sky Sports 1 6.00 Good Morning Sports Fans (HD). 8.00 Football Gold. Everton v Liverpool from the 2000/01 season. 8.15 Football League Gold. Sheffield United v Wolverhampton Wanderers. 8.25 Live Test Cricket (HD). South Africa v India. 4.00 Capital One Cup Football (HD). Sunderland v Chelsea. 5.00 Revista De La Liga (HD). Highlights from La Liga.
The Only Way … 11.15pm
How I Met Your … 7.30pm
One Foot in the … 7.40pm
Live Test Cricket, 8.25am
7.00 You’ve Been Framed! (R). Comical clips, narrated by Harry Hill. 7.30 You’ve Been Framed at Christmas (R).
6.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,HD). 6.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,HD).
6.00 The Middle (R,S,HD). Part one of two. Frankie tries to re-create her childhood summers. 6.30 The Simpsons (R,S).
6.00 The Two Ronnies Sketchbook. Messrs Corbett and Barker reminisce about sketches.
6.00 Football Gold (S). 6.15 Football Gold (S,HD). 6.30 FIFA Futbol Mundial. International football magazine.
8.00 The Xtra Factor: Groups All-Time Best and Worst. Memorable performance by groups competing over the past decade.
7.00 Hollyoaks (HD). A glimmer of hope gives Darren a glimpse of a happier future. 7.30 How I Met Your Mother (R,HD).
7.00 The Simpsons (R,S). The family is stranded in Japan. 7.30 The Simpsons (R,S). Homer becomes an artist.
7.00 Keeping Up Appearances. 7.40 One Foot in the Grave. A face from the past haunts the Meldrews.
9.00 Miss Congeniality (HD) (2000). A feminist FBI agent is sent undercover as a contestant in the Miss United States pageant when the event becomes the target of a terrorist bomb threat. As she is not exactly catwalk material, a veteran British coach is brought on board to oversee her transformation into a glamorous beauty queen. Comedy, starring Sandra Bullock and Michael Caine. ●●●●
8.00 St Trinian’s 2: The Legend of Fritton’s Gold (HD) (2009). The mischievous schoolgirls embark on a hunt for buried treasure after learning their headmistress Miss Fritton is a descendant of pirates. However, they face competition in the form of a dastardly lord eager to locate the loot for himself. Comedy sequel, starring Rupert Everett, Gemma Arterton, Colin Firth and David Tennant. ●●
8.00 Glee (R,S,HD). Blaine tries to pull the New Directions’ strings when he devises a plan to win Nationals, Kurt and his band get their first gig, and Sue reveals the story behind her tracksuit.
8.30 Outnumbered. Christmas special from 2011. The Brockmans plan to escape the festivities by spending Christmas in the sun – but fate intervenes.
9.00 Road Wars (R,S). Police officers use unmarked cars fitted with on-board video cameras, offering an insight into vehicle crime and how it can be prevented. The programme also features footage of dangerous drivers.
9.25 Absolutely Fabulous. A homecoming at the Monsoon household leads to a life-changing experience, raising questions of identity that could involve a certain person owning up to her real age.
7.00 Live Capital One Cup Football (HD). Stoke City v Manchester United (kick-off 7.45pm). Coverage of the quarterfinal at the Britannia Stadium, as the clubs meet for the second time this season. The Red Devils have already beaten Liverpool and Norwich City in the competition this season, and produced a stirring comeback in their league meeting with Mark Hughes’s men at Old Trafford in October, thanks to late goals by Wayne Rooney and Javier Hernandez.
10.00 The Royle Family. The 10.00 Strike Back: Shadow 11.15 The Only Way Is 10.05 Rude Tube: Total family settles down to Warfare (R,S,HD). Essexmas (R,HD). The Stunts (R). Alex Zane watch TV after a hearty Stonebridge’s health gang returns for the presents a countdown Christmas dinner – but deteriorates quickly as annual Christmas special of the 50 most Denise interrupts the the deadly neurotoxin of the reality series as dangerous stunts on the usual banter by going takes hold, and is moved some of Essex’s most internet, including into labour. to a mysterious research glamorous citizens breathtaking pranks, facility – making it prepare for the holiday suicidal leaps and lizard 10.55 Little Britain. Fat harder for Section 20 to season. Ferne and snogging. Fighters welcomes a get a cure to him. Charlie’s reunion is put celebrity addition. to the test, while Mario and Lucy attempt to 11.35 Harry Enfield and 11.05 Made in Chelsea (R). 11.00 Brit Cops (R,S,HD). UK work things out once Chums. With guests Jamie refuses to give up police officers tackle more. Plus, how will Arg Desmond Lynam, Jimmy on his relationship with street crime around the top last year’s Christmas Hill and Martin Clunes. Lucy, while Binky and country. jumper? Alex feel pressured to declare their love for each other.
12.15 The Xtra Factor: Groups All-Time Best and Worst (R). Memorable performance by groups competing over the past decade. 1.20 Totally Bonkers Guinness World Records (R,HD). 1.50 Life’s Funniest Moments (R). 2.20 Teleshopping. 5.50 ITV2 Nightscreen (HD).
12.10 The Big Bang Theory (R,HD). 12.40 The Big Bang Theory (R,HD). 1.10 Suburgatory (R,HD). Dallas questions whether George loves her. Last in the series. 1.40 Geeks (R). 2.35 The Cleveland Show (R,HD). 3.20 Bob’s Burgers (R,HD). 3.40 Glee (R,HD). 4.25 Ugly Betty (R,HD).
Radio 1 6.30am The Radio 1 Breakfast Show with Nick Grimshaw 10.00 Fearne Cotton 12.45pm Newsbeat 1.00 Scott Mills 3.00 The Official Chart Update 4.00 Greg James 7.00 Zane’s Hottest 100 9.00 My Playlist 10.00 Phil Taggart and Alice Levine Midnight Huw Stephens 2.00 Benji B 4.00 Dev Radio 2 5.00am Vanessa Feltz 6.30 Chris Evans 9.30 Ken Bruce Noon Jeremy Vine 2.00 Steve Wright in the Afternoon 5.00 Simon Mayo 7.00 The Folk Show with Mark Radcliffe 8.00 Jo Whiley 10.00 The Soul of Philadelphia International 11.00 Trevor Nelson’s Soul Show Midnight Janice Long 2.00 Alex Lester
12.00 Road Wars (R,S,HD). 2.00 Cop Squad (R,S,HD). Documentary following the work of Cambridgeshire police officers. 3.00 Brit Cops: Frontline Crime UK (R,S,HD). 4.00 Dog the Bounty Hunter (R,S). 4.30 Dog the Bounty Hunter (R,S). 5.00 Airline (R,S,HD). 5.30 Airline (R,S,HD).
Radio 3 6.30am Breakfast 9.00 Essential Classics Noon Composer of the Week 70th Anniversary Special: Louise Farrenc 1.00 News 1.02 Radio 3 Lunchtime Concert 2.00 Afternoon on 3 3.30 Choral Evensong 4.30 In Tune 6.30 Composer of the Week 70th Anniversary Special: Louise Farrenc 7.30 Radio 3 Live in Concert: Temple Winter Festival 10.00 Night Waves 10.45 The Essay: Let There Be Dark 11.00 Late Junction 12.30am Through the Night Radio 4 5.30am News Briefing 5.43 Prayer for the Day 5.45 Farming Today 5.58 Tweet of the Day 6.00 Today 8.31 (LW) Yesterday in Parliament 9.00 Midweek 9.45 (LW) Daily Service
9.45 (FM) Book of the Week: Darling Monster 10.00 Woman’s Hour 11.00 Lives in a Landscape 11.30 Believe It! Noon News 12.01 (LW) Shipping Forecast 12.04 You and Yours 12.57 News and Weather 1.00 The World at One 1.45 A Cause for Caroling 2.00 The Archers 2.15 Afternoon Drama: Borgen – Outside the Castle. By Tommy Bredsted and Joan Rang Christensen. Translated by Joy Wilkinson. 3.00 Money Box Live 3.30 All in the Mind 4.00 Thinking Allowed 4.30 The Media Show 5.00 PM 5.54 (LW) Shipping Forecast 5.57 Weather 6.00 Six O’Clock News 6.30 What Does the K Stand For? 7.00 The Archers 7.15 Front Row
12.10 The Royle Family 1.05 The Great Outdoors Comedy following the antics of a misfit gang of ramblers. Veteran hiker Bob meets his match in technology-loving newcomer Christine. 1.35 Harry Enfield and Chums 2.05 The Comic Strip Presents: Four Men in a Plane 2.40 Rex the Runt. 7.45 Roddy Doyle’s The Snapper 8.00 Whatever Happened to Community? – The Debate 8.45 Pop-Up Ideas. How approaches to cartography have changed over the centuries. 9.00 Frontiers. The link between genes and effective work. Last in the series. 9.30 Midweek. Lively conversation with Libby Purves. 9.59 Weather 10.00 The World Tonight 10.45 Book at Bedtime: Aunts Aren’t Gentlemen. 11.00 Political Animals 11.15 Bird Island 11.30 Today in Parliament Midnight News and Weather 12.30 Book of the Week: Darling Monster 12.48 Shipping Forecast 1.00 As BBC World Service 5.20 Shipping Forecast
7.00 Winter Wipeout (R,S). Winter version of Total Wipeout. 8.00 Great Movie Mistakes 2013 (S). Blunders in Hollywood films. 8.15 Kung Fu Panda Holiday (R,S). Seasonal spin-off from the popular animated film. 8.40 Kung Fu Panda (S) (2008). Animated comedy, with the voice of Jack Black. ●●● 10.00 Backchat with Jack Whitehall and His Dad Christmas Special (S). 10.45 Family Guy (R,S). 11.30 American Dad! (R,S). 12.15 Backchat with Jack Whitehall and His Dad Christmas Special (R,S). 1.00 Bad Education Christmas Special (R,S). 1.30 Don’t Tell the Bride: Christmas on the Slopes (R,S). 2.30 The Revolution Will Be Televised (R,S). 3.00 The Call Centre Christmas (R,S).
7.00 Battlefield Britain (R). Owain Glyndwr’s rebellion against the English. 8.00 The Secret Life of Ice (R). Gabrielle Walker explores the properties of the substance. 9.00 Nigel Slater’s Great British Biscuit. The origins of the humble biscuit. 10.00 Cleopatra: Portrait of a Killer (R). Neil Oliver examines the reign of the Egyptian queen. 11.00 Jet! When Britain Ruled the Skies (R). Part one of two. Exploring advances in aviation in the 1950s and 60s. 12.00 Frozen Planet (R). What rising temperatures will mean for life in the polar regions. Last in the series. 1.00 The Secret Life of Ice (R). 2.00 Battlefield Britain 3.00 Nigel Slater’s Great British Biscuit (R).
10.00 What’s the Story? (HD). Sarah-Jane Mee presents a discussion show focusing on recent sports developments.
11.00 Football Gold (S,HD). Action from Arsenal v Manchester United in the 1999/2000 season. 11.15 Football Gold (S). 11.30 FIFA Futbol Mundial. 12.00 Capital One Cup Football (HD). Stoke City v Manchester United. 1.00 What’s the Story? (HD). 2.00 Football Gold 2.15 Football Gold 2.30 FIFA Futbol Mundial 3.00 What’s the Story? (HD). 4.00 Capital One Cup Football (HD). 5.00 Football Gold 5.30 FIFA Futbol Mundial Radio 5 Live 5.00am Morning Reports 5.30 Wake Up to Money 6.00 5 Live Breakfast 10.00 Victoria Derbyshire Noon Shelagh Fogarty 2.00 Richard Bacon 4.00 5 Live Drive 7.00 5 Live Sport. Mark Chapman presents the day’s sports news. 7.45 5 Live Sport: League Cup Football 2013-14. Stoke City v Manchester United (kick-off 7.45pm). 10.30 Phil Williams. News and sport. 1.00am Up All Night Classic FM 6.00am More Music Breakfast 9.00 John Suchet 1.00pm Jamie Crick 5.00 Classic FM Drive 8.00 The Full Works Concert. Rossini, Mozart, Schubert, Karl Jenkins. 10.00 Smooth Classics 2.00am Nick Bailey
SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013 WEST COUNTRY LIFE 49
Thursday television&radio Thursday’s Television Guide TV PICKS
ALEX POLIZZI’S PERFECT CHRISTMAS 8pm, BBC2
The hotelier presents a guide to entertaining over the festive period, showing how to transform a home into the perfect seasonal environment.
6.00 Breakfast (S,HD). 9.15 Heir Hunters (R,S,HD). 10.00 Homes Under the Hammer (S,HD). 11.00 Caught Red Handed (R,S,HD). 11.30 Helicopter Heroes (S,HD). 12.15 Bargain Hunt (R,S). 1.00 BBC News; Weather (S,HD). 1.30 Regional News (S); Weather. 1.45 Perfection (S,HD). 2.30 Escape to the Country (R,S). 3.30 Christmas Kitchen with James Martin (S,HD). 4.15 Flog It! (S,HD). 5.15 Pointless (R,S,HD).
FILM RATINGS ●●●●● Excellent ●●●● Very good ●●● Good ●● Average ● Poor
GEORGE CLARKE’S AMAZING CHRISTMAS SPACES 8pm, Channel 4
In this festive special, the architect visits a man-made stalactite crystal grotto in Surrey, and meets a small-spaces enthusiast who has rebuilt and renovated a Victorian flat-pack tin chapel in Shropshire to create a magical holiday home.
6.00 This Is BBC Two 6.35 Homes Under the Hammer 7.35 Helicopter Heroes 8.20 Sign Zone: The A to Z of TV Cooking 9.05 Tudor Monastery Farm 10.05 Ronnie’s Animal Crackers 10.35 HARDtalk 11.00 BBC News 11.30 BBC World News 12.00 Lifeline 12.10 Film: College Road Trip (S,HD) (2008). See Choices Above. ● 1.30 Fred Dibnah’s Age of Steam 2.00 Cash in the Attic 2.45 The Truth About Lions 3.45 Cagney & Lacey 4.30 Are You Being Served? 5.00 ’Allo ’Allo! (R,S). 5.30 Priceless Antiques Roadshow (R,S).
LIVE CELEBRITY WHO WANTS TO BE A MILLIONAIRE? 9pm, ITV
As the last-ever edition of the long-running quiz approaches, Chris Tarrant invites stars including Alex Ferguson and Eamonn Holmes.
6.00 Daybreak (S,HD). 8.30 Lorraine (S). 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,S). 10.30 This Morning (S). 12.30 Let’s Do Christmas with Gino & Mel (S). 1.30 ITV News and Weather (S). 1.55 Regional News (S). 2.00 Peter Andre’s 60 Minute Makeover (S,HD). 3.00 Dickinson’s Real Deal (S,HD). Valuing antiques in Matlock, Derbyshire. 3.59 Regional Weather (S). 4.00 Show Me the Telly (S,HD). 5.00 The Chase (R,S,HD).
THE 12 DRINKS OF CHRISTMAS 9pm, BBC2
Comedy actor and Pointless host Alexander Armstrong and his journalist brother-in-law Giles Coren get together to select 12 different drinks for the festive period. Their choices range from the best Christmas Eve cocktail to the wine to serve with lunch, as well as brandy, punch and the ultimate eggnog.
Channel Channel 4
6.10 According to Jim (R,S,HD). 7.05 Will & Grace (R,S). 7.55 Everybody Loves Raymond (R,S). 8.55 Frasier (R,S). 10.00 Ruth Watson Means Business! (S,HD). 11.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 12.00 Come Dine with Me (R,S,HD). 2.10 Phil Spencer: Secret Agent (S,HD). 3.10 Countdown (S,HD). With Richard Madeley in Dictionary Corner. 4.00 Deal or No Deal (S,HD). 5.00 Four in a Bed (S,HD). 5.30 Come Dine with Me Christmas (S,HD).
Channel Channel 5
6.00 Milkshake! 9.45 Inside Hollywood. 9.50 Paul Merton in Europe (R,S). 10.50 Eddie Stobart: Trucks and Trailers (R,S,HD). 11.50 Stobart: Trucks, Trains & Planes (R,S,HD). 12.50 5 News Lunchtime (S,HD). 12.55 Neighbours (S,HD). 1.25 Film: Mistletoe Over Manhattan (S,HD) (2011). ●● 3.15 Film: The Santa Incident (S,HD) (2010). Comedy, starring Greg Germann and Ione Skye. ●●● 5.00 5 News at 5 (S,HD). 5.30 Neighbours (R,S,HD).
Mock the Week – Again, 10pm
George Clarke’s Amazing … 8pm
Person of Interest, 10pm
6.00 BBC News (S,HD); Weather. 6.30 Regional News (S); Weather.
6.00 Regional News (S); Weather. 6.30 ITV News and Weather (S).
6.00 The Simpsons (R,S). 2/20. 6.30 Hollyoaks (S,HD). A glimmer of hope gives Darren a glimpse of a happier future.
6.00 The Dog Rescuers (R,S,HD). 4/10. An RSPCA inspector deals with 20 feral dogs in a Manchester house. 6.30 NewsTalk Live (S,HD).
7.00 The One Show (S,HD). Topical stories from around the UK. 7.30 EastEnders (S,HD). David tries to regain Janine’s trust. Followed by BBC News; Regional News.
6.00 Celebrity Eggheads (S,HD). 9/10. With Suzanne Charlton, Penny Tranter, John Kettley, Jim Bacon and Francis Wilson. 6.30 Strictly Come Dancing – It Takes Two (S,HD). 59/60. 7.00 Hairy Bikers’ Christmas Party (R,S,HD). Si King and Dave Myers plan a festive gettogether, so they search the UK for the best party food they can find.
7.00 Emmerdale (S,HD). 7.30 The Greatest Gift: Tonight (S,HD). Fiona Foster talks to a man who received a heart transplant.
7.00 World’s Strongest Man 2013: Qualifiers (S,HD). Action from the Giants Live Series event in Strefjell, Norway. Followed by 5 News Update.
8.00 The Great Train Robbery (S,HD). 2/2. See Choices Above.
8.00 Alex Polizzi’s Perfect Christmas (S,HD). See Choices Above.
8.00 Emmerdale (S,HD). Charity waits for Jai and Rishi to return to the house and gleefully leaves the bedroom with Ross in tow. 8.30 New You’ve Been Framed! at Christmas (S). Festive foulups with Harry Hill.
8.00 George Clarke’s Amazing Christmas Spaces (S,HD). See Choices Above.
8.00 Stop! Police Interceptors (S). Another selection of memorable moments from the programme about the work of police interception teams in Essex, South Yorkshire, Derbyshire and Cumbria. Last in the series. Followed by 5 News at 9.
9.30 Mrs Brown’s Boys (R,S,HD). 2/2. Having cast herself in the role of the Virgin Mary and with rehearsals in full swing, Agnes vows to make her retelling of the Nativity at the community centre unforgettable.
9.00 The 12 Drinks of Christmas (S,HD). See Choices Above.
9.00 Live Celebrity Who Wants to Be a Millionaire? (S,HD). See Choices Above.
9.00 Educating Yorkshire at Christmas (S). See Choices Above.
9.00 Mobs & Yobs: Caught on Camera (S,HD). 6/6. Nick Wallis examines how CCTV means wrongdoers can no longer hide in a crowd, looking at its use in convicting people involved in the 2011 riots. Last in the series.
6 7 8 9
The Great Train Robbery, 8pm
10.00 BBC News (S,HD). 10.25 Regional News (S); Weather. 10.35 The Royle Family Christmas Special (R,S,HD). The couchpotato clan gathers for another Christmas Day, which sees Barbara proudly handing out her pound-shop presents and Dave coming up with an idea worthy of Dragons’ Den.
10.00 Mock the Week – Again (S). 4/12. An edition of the comedy show from July 2012, with Milton Jones, Ava Vidal and Mark Watson joining regulars Hugh Dennis, Andy Parsons and Chris Addison. Dara O Briain hosts. 10.30 Newsnight (S,HD). Followed by Weather.
(R) repeat (S) subtitles (HD) highdefinition
11.35 This Week (S). Andrew Neil presents the political round-up, joined by Michael Portillo and Alan Johnson for a look at the developments of the past seven days.
11.20 Tudor Monastery Farm (R,S,HD). 6/6. The team brings in the barley and celebrates with a harvest feast. Last in the series.
12.20 Skiing Weatherview (S). 12.25 BBC News (S,HD).
12.20 Sign Zone: The Romanians Are Coming? – Panorama (R,S). Paul Kenyon explores the potential impact of Romanians and Bulgarians achieving full UK employment rights – as well as gaining access to benefits, the NHS and schooling – next year. 12.50 This Is BBC Two (S). Preview of upcoming programmes. 4.00 BBC Learning Zone (S,HD).
50 WEST COUNTRY LIFE SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013
10.00 ITV News at Ten (S). 10.30 Regional News (S); Weather. 10.35 Utopia (S,HD). Bafta-winning director John Pilger presents a documentary detailing the plight of the Aboriginal population in Australia’s poorest region, Utopia. Drawing on extensive archive footage and numerous interviews, he seeks to highlight the abuses suffered by indigenous people from the early days of white settlers to modern times, drawing parallels to South Africa during the apartheid era. 12.35 Jackpot247. Viewers get the chance to participate in live interactive gaming from the comfort of their sofas, with a mix of roulette-wheel spins and lively chat from the presenting team. 3.00 The Greatest Gift: Tonight (R,S,HD). 3.25 ITV Nightscreen (HD). Text-based information service. 5.05 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,S). Guests air their differences.
10.00 What Happens in Kavos (S). 3/3. The documentary follows young tourists experiencing their first holiday without their parents, including a group of girls aiming to make their trip X-rated. Last in the series.
10.00 Person of Interest (S,HD). 9/22. The Machine selects the social security number of a cab driver who is trying to get his family out of Cuba, but a laptop left in his taxi puts his life in danger.
11.00 Gogglebox (R,S). 13/13. Weekly TV review programme. 11.50 Karaoke Nights (HD). The thriving karaoke pub scene in Barry, south Wales.
11.00 Excessive Compulsive Collectors (R,S,HD). Documentary examining the world’s most extreme and unusual collectors.
12.45 24 Hours in A&E (R,S). Doctors are concerned a 38-year-old woman may be paralysed. 1.45 Embarrassing Bodies Special (S,HD). The team presents an edition devoted to cancer. 2.40 One Born Every Minute (R,S,HD). 3.35 A Place in the Sun: Winter Sun (R,S,HD). 4.30 Deal or No Deal (R,S,HD). 5.25 Countdown (R,S,HD).
12.00 SuperCasino. Viewers get the chance to take part in live interactive gaming, with a mix of roulette-wheel spins and lively chat from the presenting team. 3.05 Red Sea Jaws (R,S). 3.55 HouseBusters (R,S). 4.20 HouseBusters (R,S). Life-enhancing changes to a home. 4.45 Great Artists (R,S). 5.10 Nick’s Quest (R,S). 5.35 Wildlife SOS (R,S).
EDUCATING YORKSHIRE AT CHRISTMAS 9pm, Channel 4
THE GREAT TRAIN ROBBERY 8pm, BBC1
A return visit to Thornhill Community Academy to find out how the pupils’ lives have changed since they were first filmed, including Musharaf, who has a new-found confidence.
The police wake to the news of a robbery, but the full extent of the crime and its haul – £2.6million – only becomes evident over the following days. It’s clear the local CID is illequipped to solve a case of such magnitude, so Scotland Yard is called in. Written by Broadchurch creator Chris Chibnall.
6.00 Emmerdale 6.25 Coronation Street 6.55 You’ve Been Framed at Christmas! 7.45 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 8.30 Dinner Date 9.30 The Real Housewives of New York City 10.25 The Xtra Factor: Groups All-Time Best and Worst 11.25 Jack and the Beanstalk 1.00 Emmerdale 1.30 Coronation Street 2.00 The Jeremy Kyle Show 4.10 The Xtra Factor: Groups All-Time Best and Worst 5.15 Cinderella
6.00 Switched 6.25 Ugly Betty 7.10 Charmed 8.00 Glee 9.00 How I Met Your Mother 9.30 2 Broke Girls 10.00 Rude(ish) Tube 11.00 Rules of Engagement 11.30 Charmed 12.30 Hollyoaks 1.00 How I Met Your Mother 2.00 The Big Bang Theory 3.00 Rude(ish) Tube 4.00 Rules of Engagement 5.00 How I Met Your Mother (R,HD).
Sky1 Sky1 6.00 Dog the Bounty Hunter (R,S). 7.00 The Middle (R,S,HD). 8.00 Stargate Atlantis (R,S,HD). 9.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S,HD). 11.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S,HD). 1.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S,HD). 2.00 Hawaii Five-0 (R,S,HD). 3.00 Stargate Atlantis (R,S,HD). 4.00 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 5.00 Futurama (R,S). 5.30 The Middle (R,S,HD).
Thursday television&radio COLLEGE ROAD TRIP 12.10pm, BBC2
AMERICAN PIE PRESENTS BAND CAMP 11pm, ITV2
An overprotective father escorts his daughter on a disastrous road trip across America to attend a college interview. Comedy, with Martin Lawrence.
Gold GOLD 6.15 Sykes 6.45 The Brittas Empire 7.15 Ever Decreasing Circles 7.55 The Green Green Grass 8.35 The Good Life 9.15 To the Manor Born 9.50 Last of the Summer Wine 11.40 The Bleak Old Shop of Stuff 12.20 The Green Green Grass 1.00 Ever Decreasing Circles 1.40 The Two Ronnies Sketchbook 2.40 Keeping Up Appearances 3.20 One Foot in the Grave 4.10 Last of the Summer Wine
A mischievous teenager dreams of becoming a porn film-maker like his big brother. Comedy, with Arielle Kebbel.
SkySports1 Sky Sports 1 6.00 Good Morning Sports Fans (HD). 7.00 Good Morning Sports Fans (HD). 8.00 Football Gold 8.15 Football Gold 8.25 Live Test Cricket (HD). South Africa v India. 4.00 Capital One Cup Football (HD). Stoke City v Manchester United. 5.00 FIFA Futbol Mundial. International football magazine. 5.30 Premier League World (HD). A round-up of the latest news.
Max Payne, 9pm
Live Darts, 7pm
6.45 You’ve Been Framed! Kids Special (R). Harry Hill presents a special collection of kiddiethemed camcorder clips from the archives.
6.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,HD). Leonard decides to change his ways. 6.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,HD).
6.00 The Middle (R,S,HD). 6.30 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). Homer receives marital advice from a movie star.
6.00 Bring Me Morecambe & Wise. Celebrating the duo’s Christmas specials.
7.30 You’ve Been Framed! Christmas (R). Harry Hill narrates a festive selection of camcorder calamities.
7.00 Hollyoaks (HD). Ste urges John Paul to break off his affair with Danny. 7.30 How I Met Your Mother (R,HD).
7.00 The Simpsons (R,S). Marge has a nervous breakdown. 7.30 The Simpsons (R,S). With the voice of Stephen Hawking.
7.00 One Foot in the Grave. Christmas special from 1997, starring Richard Wilson, with a guest appearance by Tim Brooke-Taylor.
8.00 The Xtra Factor: Overs All-Time Best and Worst. Stand out over 25 contestants from the past decade of the talent show. Plus, a look at which have gone on to global success.
8.00 How I Met Your Mother (R,HD). Robin tries to find something that she buried in Central Park. 8.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,HD). Bernadette receives her PhD.
8.00 Inside RAF Brize Norton (S,HD). An urgent medical evacuation flight takes off for Afghanistan.
8.35 Only Fools and Horses. Del and Rodney are sick of Grandad’s cooking and TV circuses, so they put on their glad rags and have a festive night out. Christmas special of the sitcom from 1981.
6.00 Ringside (HD). Boxing magazine, including highlights of recent bouts and interviews with the stars currently causing a stir in the ring. 7.00 Live World PDC Darts Championship (HD). Coverage of the seventh evening of the event at the Alexandra Palace in London, where the concluding four firstround matches take place. This time last year, Michael van Gerwen made a winning start with a defeat of Paul Lim, while Vincent van der Voort, Mark Walsh and Scott Rand brought the first round to a close with victories. Plus, coverage of a preliminary-round fixture.
9.00 MC Hammer’s Big Shot 9.00 Max Payne (HD) (2008). 9.00 Moone Boy (R,S,HD). 9.20 Absolutely Fabulous. Academy (HD). The US A tormented cop Edina signs a French Martin begins his last rap legend offers tips to searches in vain for the movie actress in a bid to week of primary school, budding musicians and man who killed his wife win Saffy’s respect and and becomes a tearaway presents a selection of while also investigating bolster her client list – in a bid to leave his mark videos submitted by the a series of murders but the woman’s talents on the place. public, who attempt a connected to an turn out to be rather 9.30 Road Wars (R,S). Police version of his mega-hit U experimental drug that questionable. Jennifer officers combat vehicle Can’t Touch This. causes nightmarish Saunders, Joanna Lumley crime. hallucinations. However, and Julia Sawalha star. he finds himself pursued 10.00 The Two Ronnies 10.00 Trollied (R,S,HD). 10.00 Celebrity Juice: by a vengeful woman Christmas Sketchbook. Kieran’s girlfriend asks Parallel Juicyverse who thinks he was Another chance to see him a serious question. Part One (HD). Part one involved in the death of Ronnie Barker’s final of two. Keith Lemon her sister. Action thriller, 10.30 Trollied (R,S,HD). Julie screen appearance, in looks back at the show’s conducts interviews for based on the video which he and Ronnie best moments from Leanne’s replacement, game, starring Mark Corbett choose their 2013, and falls into a and Katie informs Kieran Wahlberg, Mila Kunis favourite sketches, songs different dimension in she will not be attending and Beau Bridges. ●● and monologues from which everything is his wedding. their festive shows. reversed. 11.00 Bottom. Richie and Eddie celebrate Christmas. Comedy, with Adrian Edmondson. 11.40 Harry Enfield and Chums. The Terminator invades a period drama.
12.55 The Xtra Factor: Overs AllTime Best and Worst (R). 1.55 Life’s Funniest Moments (R). Video clips of hilariously candid moments captured on camera. 2.15 Teleshopping. Buying goods from the comfort of home. 5.45 ITV2 Nightscreen (HD). Textbased information service.
12.20 I’m Alan Partridge. A chance encounter with Kitchen Planet mogul Dan Moody results in Alan being asked to present the prestigious Norwich Bravery Awards. 1.00 The Comic Strip Presents: Funseekers 1.50 Bottom 2.20 Harry Enfield and Chums
11.00 American Pie Presents 11.00 Rude Tube (R,HD). Alex 11.00 Road Wars (R,S,HD). Zane presents a The Tactical Aid Group Band Camp (HD) countdown of 50 raids a flat. (2005). See Choices internet mash-ups. Above. ●●
12.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,HD). Leonard decides to change his ways. 12.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,HD). 1.00 How I Met Your Mother (R,HD). 1.30 The Cleveland Show (R,HD). 2.00 Rude Tube (R,HD). 2.50 Glee (R,HD). 3.30 Glee (R,HD). 4.15 Ugly Betty (R,HD).
Radio 1 6.30am The Radio 1 Breakfast Show with Nick Grimshaw 10.00 Fearne Cotton 12.45pm Newsbeat 1.00 Scott Mills 4.00 Greg James 7.00 Zane’s Hottest 100 9.00 In New DJs We Trust 10.00 Phil Taggart and Alice Levine Midnight The Residency: Mosca 2.00 Toddla T 4.00 Dev Radio 2 5.00am Vanessa Feltz 6.30 Chris Evans 9.30 Ken Bruce Noon Jeremy Vine 2.00 Steve Wright in the Afternoon 5.00 Simon Mayo 7.00 Bob Harris Country 8.00 Jo Whiley 10.00 The Soul of Atlantic 11.00 Nigel Ogden: The Organist Entertains 11.30 Listen to the Band Midnight Janice Long 2.00 Alex Lester
12.00 Brit Cops: Frontline Crime UK (R,S,HD). The work of police officers in Devon and Cornwall. 1.00 Brit Cops (R,S). 2.00 Cop Squad (R,S). 3.00 Brit Cops (R,S). 4.00 Dog the Bounty Hunter (R,S). 4.30 Dog the Bounty Hunter (R,S). 5.00 Airline (R,S,HD). 5.30 Airline (R,S,HD).
Radio 3 6.30am Breakfast 9.00 Essential Classics Noon Composer of the Week 70th Anniversary Special: Louise Farrenc 1.00 News 1.02 Radio 3 Lunchtime Concert 2.00 Afternoon on 3 4.45 In Tune 6.30 Composer of the Week 70th Anniversary Special: Louise Farrenc 7.30 Radio 3 Live in Concert: Temple Winter Festival 10.00 Night Waves 10.45 The Essay: Let There Be Dark 11.00 Late Junction 12.30am Through the Night Radio 4 5.30am News Briefing 5.43 Prayer for the Day 5.45 Farming Today 5.58 Tweet of the Day 6.00 Today 8.31 (LW) Yesterday in Parliament 9.00 In Our Time 9.45 (LW) Daily Service
9.45 (FM) Book of the Week: Darling Monster 10.00 Woman’s Hour 11.00 Crossing Continents 11.30 The Lost Tapes of Orson Welles Noon News 12.01 (LW) Shipping Forecast 12.04 You and Yours 12.57 Weather 1.00 The World at One 1.45 A Cause for Caroling 2.00 The Archers 2.15 Afternoon Drama: Borgen – Outside the Castle 3.00 Open Country 3.27 Radio 4 Appeal 3.30 Open Book 4.00 The Film Programme 4.30 Inside Science 5.00 PM 5.54 (LW) Shipping Forecast 5.57 Weather 6.00 Six O’Clock News 6.30 The Secret World 7.00 The Archers 7.15 Front Row 7.45 Roddy Doyle’s The Snapper 8.00 Report 8.30 In Business
9.00 Inside Science. Adam Rutherford explores the latest scientific research to make the headlines and how science is evolving and transforming culture. 9.30 In Our Time. Melvyn Bragg and guests discuss the science of complexity theory and its importance in helping to understand the world. 9.59 Weather 10.00 The World Tonight 10.45 Book at Bedtime: Aunts Aren’t Gentlemen 11.00 Alice’s Wunderland. Comedy sketches, by Alice Lowe. 11.30 Today in Parliament Midnight News and Weather 12.30 Book of the Week: Darling Monster 12.48 Shipping Forecast 1.00 As BBC World Service 5.20 Shipping Forecast
7.00 Great Movie Mistakes 2013 (S). 7.15 Atlantis (R,S). Jason’s hunger proves his undoing. 8.00 Don’t Tell the Bride: Christmas on the Slopes (R,S). A wedding ceremony on the Swiss Alps. 9.00 Christmas on Benefits (S). A group of jobseekers are challenged to organise a festive party on a budget. 10.00 Him & Her: The Wedding (S). 10.30 EastEnders (R,S). 11.00 Family Guy (R,S). 11.25 Family Guy (R,S). 11.45 American Dad! 12.10 American Dad! (R,S). 12.30 Him & Her: The Wedding (R,S). 1.00 Christmas on Benefits (R,S). 2.00 Don’t Tell the Bride: Christmas on the Slopes (R,S). 3.00 Snog, Marry, Avoid? Christmas Special (R,S). 3.30 Him & Her: The Wedding (R,S).
7.00 Battlefield Britain (R). 8.00 Ocean Giants (R). The vocal ranges of whales and dolphins. Last in the series. 9.00 Byzantium: A Tale of Three Cities. The transformation of Istanbul in the 20th century. Last in the series. 10.00 New Hidden Killers: The Edwardian Home (R). Part two of two. Mishaps caused by early electrical equipment. 11.00 Shipwrecks: Britain’s Sunken History (R). The development of the ”women and children first” protocol. Last in the series. 12.00 Jet! When Britain Ruled the Skies (R). 1.00 Ocean Giants (R). 2.00 Battlefield Britain (R). How England repelled the Spanish Armada. 3.00 Byzantium: A Tale of Three Cities (R).
12.00 NFL – A Football Life (HD). 1.00 Capital One Cup Football (HD). 2.00 The Rugby Club (HD). 3.00 Football League Gold (HD). 3.15 Football League Gold (HD). 3.30 Ringside (HD). 4.30 Capital One Cup Football (HD). 5.30 Football League Gold (HD). 5.45 Football League Gold (HD). Radio 5 Live 5.00am Morning Reports 5.30 Wake Up to Money 6.00 5 Live Breakfast 10.00 Victoria Derbyshire Noon Shelagh Fogarty 2.00 Richard Bacon 4.00 5 Live Drive 7.00 5 Live Sport 8.00 5 Live Sport: 5 Live Racing. A look ahead to the festive racing period, including the King George VI Chase, which is set to take place at Kempton Park on Boxing Day. 9.00 The Day We Won Wimbledon 10.00 Phil Williams 1.00am Up All Night Classic FM 6.00am More Music Breakfast 9.00 John Suchet 1.00pm Jamie Crick 5.00 Classic FM Drive 8.00 The Full Works Concert 10.00 Smooth Classics 2.00am Bob Jones
SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013 WEST COUNTRY LIFE 51
Fr iday Television television&radio Friday’s Guide TV PICKS
CITIZEN KHAN 8.30pm, BBC1
Mr Khan accidentally dumps his wife’s favourite family heirloom in the mosque’s charity collection, and has to go to extraordinary lengths to retrieve it.
6.00 Breakfast (S,HD). 9.15 Heir Hunters (R,S,HD). 10.00 Homes Under the Hammer (R,S,HD). 11.00 Caught Red Handed (R,S,HD). 11.30 Helicopter Heroes (S,HD). 12.15 Bargain Hunt (S,HD). 1.00 BBC News; Weather (S,HD). 1.30 Regional News (S); Weather. 1.45 Perfection (S,HD). 2.30 Escape to the Country (R,S). 3.30 Christmas Kitchen with James Martin (S,HD). 4.15 Flog It! (S,HD). From Dover. 5.15 Pointless (R,S,HD).
FILM RATINGS ●●●●● Excellent ●●●● Very good ●●● Good ●● Average ● Poor
BIG FAT GYPSY WEDDINGS: CAROLS AND CARAVANS 9pm, Channel 4
A one-off special following the Christmas celebrations of the travelling community. In Queensferry, former Celebrity Big Brother winner Paddy Doherty is preparing for his favourite time of year, decking his trailer in lights and going shopping for gifts.
6.00 This Is BBC Two 6.30 Homes Under the Hammer 7.30 Helicopter Heroes 8.15 Sign Zone: Don’t Panic – The Truth About Population 9.15 Africa 2013: Countdown to the Rains 10.15 Animal Park 11.00 News 11.30 World News (S,HD). 12.00 Film: The Importance of Being Earnest (S) (2002). ●●● 1.30 Fred Dibnah’s Age of Steam (R,S). 2.00 Cash in the Attic (R,S). 2.45 The Truth About Lions (R,S). 3.45 Cagney & Lacey (R,S). 4.30 Are You Being Served? 5.05 ’Allo ’Allo! (R,S). 5.30 Priceless Antiques Roadshow (S).
TEXT SANTA 8pm, ITV
The festive fundraising extravaganza returns for a third year, with presenting duos Ant and Dec, Holly Willoughby and Phillip Schofield, and Paddy McGuinness and Christine Bleakley.
6.00 Daybreak (S,HD). 8.30 Lorraine (S). 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,S). 10.30 This Morning (S). 12.30 Let’s Do Christmas with Gino & Mel (S). 1.30 ITV News and Weather (S). 1.55 Regional News (S). 2.00 Peter Andre’s 60 Minute Makeover (S,HD). 3.00 Dickinson’s Real Deal: Text Santa Christmas Special (S,HD). 3.59 Regional Weather (S). 4.00 Show Me the Telly (S,HD). 5.00 The Chase: Celebrity Special (S,HD).
2013: MOMENTS IN TIME 9pm, BBC2
From the helicopter crash in London in January, to the Bush fires in Tasmania and the Boston Marathon bombing, nonprofessionals took some of the most striking pictures of 2013. This documentary tells the story of 2013 told through images captured by members of the public.
Channel Channel 4
6.10 According to Jim (R,S,HD). 7.00 Will & Grace (R,S). 7.55 Everybody Loves Raymond (R,S). 9.00 Frasier (R,S). 10.00 Ruth Watson Means Business! (S,HD). 11.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,S,HD). 12.00 Come Dine with Me (R,S,HD). 2.10 Phil Spencer: Secret Agent (S,HD). 3.10 Countdown (S,HD). 4.00 Deal or No Deal (S,HD). 5.00 Four in a Bed (S,HD). The winning guest house is announced. 5.30 Come Dine with Me Christmas (S,HD).
Channel Channel 5
6.00 Milkshake! 9.45 Inside Hollywood. 9.50 Paul Merton in Europe (R,S). 10.50 Eddie Stobart: Trucks and Trailers (R,S,HD). 11.50 Pothole Britain – Drivers Beware! (R,S,HD). 12.50 5 News Lunchtime (S,HD). 12.55 Neighbours (S,HD). 1.25 Chinese Food in Minutes (R,S). 1.30 Film: The Christmas Heart (S,HD) (2012). ●●● 3.15 Film: Santa Jr (S,HD) (2002). ●●● 5.00 5 News at 5 (S,HD). 5.30 Neighbours (R,S,HD).
Coronation Street, 7.30pm
Alan Carr: Chatty Man, 10pm
Stobart: Trucks, Trains … 8pm
6.00 BBC News (S,HD); Weather. 6.30 Regional News (S); Weather.
6.00 Regional News (S); Weather. 6.30 ITV News and Weather (S).
6.00 The Simpsons (R,S). 3/20. 6.30 Hollyoaks (S,HD). Ste puts aside his enmity with John Paul and urges him to break off his affair with Danny.
6.00 The Dog Rescuers (R,S,HD). 5/10. RSPCA inspectors find two dogs being kept in atrocious conditions. 6.30 NewsTalk Live (S,HD).
7.00 The One Show (S,HD). 7.30 A Question of Sport (R,S,HD). With Ian Thorpe, Ryan Sidebottom, Tim Visser and Sarah Storey. Followed by BBC News; Regional News.
6.00 Celebrity Eggheads (S,HD). 10/10. 6.30 Strictly Come Dancing – It Takes Two (S,HD). 60/60. A look ahead to the final. Last in the series. 7.30 Christmas University Challenge (S,HD). 1/10. New series. Distinguished graduates of the University of Reading and Emmanuel College, Cambridge.
7.00 Emmerdale (S,HD). Declan heads into the woods alone with a shotgun. 7.30 Coronation Street (S,HD). Kylie is asked to leave after turning up drunk to Max’s nativity play.
7.00 World’s Strongest Man 2013: Qualifiers (S,HD). James Richardson presents action from the Giants Live Series event in Gateshead. Followed by 5 News Update.
8.00 EastEnders (S,HD). Emotions run high when David and Janine visit Pat’s grave. 8.30 Citizen Khan (S). 7/7. See Choices Above.
8.00 Mastermind (S,HD). 17/31. Specialist subjects include heavyweight boxing and the novels of Peter Carey. 8.30 Kangaroo Dundee (S,HD). 4/6. Brolga hits a snag while trying to build Rocky the wallaby a habitat from scratch.
8.00 Stobart: Trucks, Trains & Planes (S,HD). See Choices Above. Followed by 5 News at 9.
9.00 Have I Got 2013 News for You (S,HD). 11/11. A compilation of highlights from this year’s editions of the satirical current affairs quiz. Last in the series. 9.30 Live at the Apollo (S,HD). 5/6. Comedy sets by Jack Whitehall, Katherine Ryan and Rich Hall.
9.00 2013: Moments in Time (S). See Choices Above.
9.00 Big Fat Gypsy Weddings: Carols and Caravans (S,HD). See Choices Above.
10.00 BBC News (S,HD). 10.25 Regional News (S). Followed by National Lottery Update. 10.35 The Graham Norton Show (S,HD). 10/20. Graham chats to stage and screen actress Julie Walters, Luther star Idris Elba, comedy favourite Miranda Hart and rapper Tinie Tempah.
10.00 QI (R,S,HD). 17/18. Stephen Fry presents a festive special of the comedy quiz from 2011, with actor and explorer Brian Blessed and comedians Sean Lock and Ross Noble joining regular panellist Alan Davies to answer questions on the theme of ice. 10.30 Newsnight (S,HD).
8.00 Text Santa (S,HD). The festive fundraising extravaganza returns for a third year, with the evening’s presenting duos – Ant and Dec, Holly Willoughby and Phillip Schofield, and Paddy McGuinness and Christine Bleakley – joined by a host of celebrities to raise money for six deserving causes. The stars of Coronation Street perform Fairytale of Weatherfield, featuring Shane MacGowan of the Pogues, and characters from Emmerdale appear in a sketch with a Text Santa twist. There’s also a oneoff edition of Take Me Out featuring singletons all over the age of 50, and the Big Reunion bands – Blue, Atomic Kitten, 5ive, Honeyz, B*Witched, 911 and Liberty X – perform their charity single, a cover of Wizzard’s hit I Wish It Could Be Christmas Everyday, leading to a spectacular grand finale. See Choices Above.
8.00 Gordon Ramsay’s Festive Home Cooking (S). See Choices Above.
6 7 8 9
9.00 Eraser (S,HD) (1996). An arms industry executive is placed in danger after she exposes evidence of illegal deals by an international corporation. The authorities respond by assigning her to the custody of a government agent who specialises in helping federal witnesses disappear from the system. However, when the operative is framed for murder, he is forced to balance his duties with efforts to clear his own name. Action thriller, starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, James Caan, Vanessa L Williams and James Coburn. ●●
(R) repeat (S) subtitles (HD) highdefinition
11.25 The Matt Lucas Christmas Awards (R,S,HD). The funnyman hosts a festive edition of the light-hearted awards ceremony, inviting Jo Brand, Alan Davies and Rhod Gilbert to make the nominations in several silly categories.
11.00 Weather (S). 11.05 Tamara Drewe (S,HD) (2010). See Choices Above. ●●●●
11.00 ITV News and Weather (S). 11.30 Regional News (S); Weather. 11.45 Text Santa Highlights (S). The best bits from this evening’s charity appeal, in which the stars of Corrie performed Fairytale of Weatherfield.
11.05 Stand Up for the Week (S,HD). 8/8. Paul Chowdhry hosts the satirical comedy show. Last in the series. 11.55 Gogglebox (R,S). 13/13. Weekly TV review programme. Last in the series.
11.15 Mobs & Yobs: Caught on Camera (R,S,HD). 6/6. Nick Wallis examines how CCTV and helicopter cameras mean wrongdoers can no longer hide in a crowd. Last in the series.
12.05 Film: Virus (S) (1999). See Choices Above. ●● 1.35 Weatherview (S). 1.40 BBC News (S,HD).
12.50 Sign Zone: Me, You and Doctor Who: A Culture Show Special (R,S). Matthew Sweet examines the enduring appeal and cultural impact of the longrunning sci-fi series, with contributions by Matt Smith, Mark Ravenhill and Ken Livingstone. 1.50 Sign Zone: An Adventure in Space and Time (R,S). 3.20 This Is BBC Two (S).
1.05 Jackpot247. 3.00 Film: Murder, She Wrote: The Last Free Man (S) (2001). Jessica Fletcher uncovers home truths about her own family while investigating the death of a slave. Mystery based on the TV series, starring Angela Lansbury in a dual role, alongside Phylicia Rashad, Michael Jace and David Ogden Stiers. ●● 4.30 ITV Nightscreen (HD).
12.40 Film: Barney’s Version (S,HD) (2010). Premiere. Drama, with Paul Giamatti, Dustin Hoffman and Rosamund Pike. ●●●● 2.50 The Big C: Hereafter (S,HD). 3.50 Don’t Trust the B**** in Apartment 23 (S,HD). The girls ask out the same guy. 4.10 90210 (R,S,HD). 4.55 Deal or No Deal (R,S,HD). 5.50 The Treacle People (R,S).
12.15 SuperCasino Viewers get the chance to take part in live interactive gaming, with a mix of roulette-wheel spins and lively chat from the presenting team. 3.05 Monty Halls and the Ghost Ship of Thunder Bay (R,S,HD). 3.55 Motorsport Mundial (HD). 4.20 House Doctor (R,S). 4.45 Great Artists (R,S). 5.10 Nick’s Quest (R,S). 5.35 Wildlife SOS (R,S).
52 WEST COUNTRY LIFE SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013
10.00 Alan Carr: Chatty Man (S,HD). 17/18. The host is joined by guests including American pop superstar Katy Perry, who chats and performs her new single Unconditionally live in the studio.
GORDON RAMSAY’S FESTIVE HOME COOKING 8pm, Channel 4 The chef prepares some of his favourite seasonal food, including eggs Benedict, beef fillet with salsa verde, and smoky pulled pork with chipotle mayonnaise.
STOBART: TRUCKS, TRAINS & PLANES 8pm, Channel 5
Biomass trucker Tim Fox is due to give a talk to firefighters at Penrith Community Fire Station, but they are called out to an emergency, while a rail crew has to deal with subsidence threatening to submerge a length of track. Meanwhile, Ashley Maddocks has a last-minute lorry load of drinks to deliver.
6.00 Emmerdale 6.55 You’ve Been Framed at Christmas 7.45 Jeremy Kyle Show USA 8.30 Real Housewives of New York City 10.25 Xtra Factor: Overs All-Time Best and Worst 11.25 Cinderella 1.00 Emmerdale 2.00 Jeremy Kyle Show (R). 4.10 Xtra Factor: Overs All-Time Best and Worst (R). 5.10 Film: The Iron Giant (HD) (1999). ●●●●●
6.00 Switched 6.25 Ugly Betty 7.10 Charmed 8.00 Glee 9.00 Prep & Landing: Naughty v Nice 9.30 2 Broke Girls 10.00 Rude(ish) Tube 11.00 Rules of Engagement 11.30 Charmed 12.30 Hollyoaks 1.00 How I Met Your Mother 2.00 The Big Bang Theory 3.00 Rude(ish) Tube. 4.00 Rules of Engagement 5.00 How I Met Your Mother (R,HD).
Sky1 Sky1 6.00 Dog the Bounty Hunter (R,S). 7.00 The Middle (R,S,HD). 8.00 Stargate Atlantis (R,S,HD). 9.00 Hawaii Five-0 (R,S,HD). 10.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S,HD). 12.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S,HD). 1.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (R,S,HD). 2.00 Road Wars (R,S). 3.00 A Very JLS Christmas. 4.30 The Simpsons (R,S,HD). 5.00 Futurama (R,S). 5.30 The Middle (R,S,HD).
Friday television&radio VIRUS 12.05am, BBC1
TAMARA DREWE 11.05pm, BBC2
A salvage tug crew boards an abandoned Russian vessel and encounters a deadly alien life form composed of pure energy. Thriller, with Jamie Lee Curtis.
Gold GOLD 6.00 Sykes 6.30 Bread 7.00 The Brittas Empire 7.40 Ever Decreasing Circles 8.20 The Bleak Old Shop of Stuff 8.55 The Green Green Grass 9.35 Last of the Summer Wine 11.20 The Bleak Old Shop of Stuff 12.00 The Green Green Grass 12.40 Ever Decreasing Circles 1.20 To the Manor Born 2.00 One Foot in the Grave 3.35 Last of the Summer Wine 5.15 Only Fools and Horses
A journalist returns to the sleepy village where she grew up, becoming an object of obsession for every man in the neighbourhood. Comedy, with Gemma Arterton.
SkySports1 Sky Sports 1 6.00 Good Morning Sports Fans (HD). 7.00 Good Morning Sports Fans (HD). 8.00 Football Gold 8.15 Football Gold Liverpool v Manchester United from the 1996/97 season. 8.25 Live Test Cricket (HD). South Africa v India. 4.00 Ringside (HD). Boxing magazine. 5.00 Capital One Cup Football (HD). A review of the competition’s quarter-finals.
Die Hard, 9pm
The Fantasy Football … 6pm
6.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,HD). 6.30 The Big Bang Theory (R,HD). Penny agrees to a date with Leonard.
6.00 The Middle (R,S,HD). 6.30 The Simpsons (R,S). Featuring the guest voice of James Earl Jones.
6.00 The Two Ronnies Christmas Sketchbook The duo’s favourite songs and sketches from their festive shows.
6.00 The Fantasy Football Club (HD). John Fendley and Paul Merson present a discussion on key fantasy football issues.
7.00 You’ve Been Framed! (R). Comical clips, narrated by Harry Hill. 7.30 You’ve Been Framed at Christmas! (R).
7.00 Hollyoaks (HD). 7.30 How I Met Your Mother (R,HD). Barney tries to persuade Quinn to leave her job as a stripper.
7.00 The Simpsons (R,S). Homer offers to donate a kidney to Grampa. 7.30 The Simpsons (R,HD). Featuring music by Sigur Ros.
7.25 Harry Hill’s Christmas TV Burp The bigcollared comedian takes a sideways look at festive TV offerings. 7.55 dinnerladies
8.00 The Xtra Factor: Judges All-Time Best and Worst A look at the judges’ best and worst behaviour.
8.00 The Big Bang Theory (R,HD). Bernadette receives her PhD. 8.30 How I Met Your Mother (R,HD). Robin tries to find something that she buried in Central Park.
8.00 Yonderland (R,S,HD). Debbie brings some much-needed common sense to a village inhabited by idiots. 8.30 The Simpsons (R,S). Three Halloweenthemed tales.
8.40 Only Fools and Horses Rodney dates an artist who turns out to be the daughter of the Duke of Maylebury. Del sees the chance for the Trotter family to marry into the aristocracy, and disastrously gatecrashes a party at the Duke’s country estate. Christmas special from 1986, starring David Jason and Nicholas Lyndhurst.
7.00 Live World PDC Darts Championship (HD). Coverage of the eighth evening of the event at the Alexandra Palace in London, where the second round gets under way with three matches. This time last year, Phil Taylor came from a set down to defeat Dutch youngster Jerry Hendriks, while Robert Thornton knocked out Paul Nicholson in a suddendeath leg.
American Pie … 11.10pm
7.00 Great Movie Mistakes 2013 (S). 7.15 Doctor Who (R,S). 8.00 The Call Centre Christmas (R,S). The staff enjoy a festive atmosphere in Swansea’s third largest call centre. 9.00 Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy (S) (2004). Newsroom comedy, starring Will Ferrell. ●●● 10.30 EastEnders (R,S). Emotions run high when David and Janine visit Pat’s grave. 11.00 Family Guy (R,S). 11.25 Family Guy (R,S). 11.45 Family Guy (R,S). 12.10 Family Guy (R,S). 12.30 American Dad! (R,S). 1.15 Backchat with Jack Whitehall and His Dad Christmas Special (R,S). 2.00 Bad Education Christmas Special (R,S). 2.30 Him & Her: The Wedding (R,S). 3.00 The Revolution Will Be Televised (R,S). 3.30 Bad Education Christmas Special (R,S).
7.00 Top of the Pops: A Christmas Cracker (R). A selection of festive hits from yesteryear. 7.10 Proms on Four: John Wilson’s Hollywood Rhapsody (R). A concert of film scores and movie theme songs. 9.00 Legends (R). Celebration of Roy Orbison’s life and career. 10.00 The Andy Williams Christmas Show (R). Compilation of highlights from the crooner’s seasonal specials. 10.30 Duets: The Andy Williams Show (R). Featuring Bing Crosby, Ray Charles and Johnny Mathis. 11.30 Duets at the BBC (R). 12.30 Legends (R). 1.30 The Andy Williams Christmas Show (R). 2.00 Duets: The Andy Williams Show (R). 3.00 Duets at the BBC (R).
9.00 Die Hard (HD) (1988). 9.00 The Fast and the 9.00 Glee (S). Festive episode New York cop John Furious: Tokyo Drift of the musical comedy. McClane visits Los (HD) (2003). An Rachel, Kurt and Santana Angeles to see his family American teenager is get jobs as Santa’s elves over the Christmas sent to live with his at a New York mall, while holiday. Stopping off at father in Tokyo after a the members of New his wife’s place of work, brush with the law, but Directions audition for a he realises armed men soon becomes involved living Nativity. have taken over the in illegal street racing. building and are holding When he ends up owing the corporation’s staff to money to gangsters, he 10.00 Knowing Me, ransom – and only he has 10.00 Karl Pilkington: The has to learn to master Knowing Yule – With Moaning of Life the ability to fight back. the Japanese style of Alan Partridge The (R,S,HD). Karl ends his Action thriller, starring driving to win and pay chat show host throws a journey with a look at Bruce Willis, Alan back his debts. Action seasonal house party, set differing attitudes to Rickman and Bonnie adventure, starring Lucas in an exact replica of his death. In Ghana, he Bedelia. ●●●●● Black, Nathalie Kelley Norwich home, where attends his first-ever and Bow Wow. Including guests include a crossfuneral and the FYI Daily ●● dressing celebrity chef. accompanying parade. 11.10 American Pie 11.00 Bottom The grubby duo 11.00 Premier League 11.40 The Big Bang Theory 11.00 Cop Squad (R,S). The Presents: The Naked steal a car and discover (R,HD). Penny finds out work of police officers in Preview (HD). A look Mile (HD) (2006). the tickets for the Leonard’s family never Cambridgeshire. ahead to the weekend’s Comedy, starring John unfortunate owner’s celebrated his birthdays, fixtures. White, Eugene Levy and honeymoon inside. so she enlists Sheldon’s 11.30 Football League Gold Steve Talley. Including help to organise a 11.40 Harry Enfield and 11.45 Football League Gold FYI Daily. ●● surprise party. Chums
1.15 Celebrity Juice: Parallel Juicyverse Part One (R,HD). 2.10 The Only Way Is Essexmas 3.00 MC Hammer’s Big Shot Academy 3.50 Film: Land of the Lost (HD) (2009). ●● 5.25 Totally Bonkers Guinness World Records 5.50 Conor Maynard: The Hot Desk 5.55 Nightscreen
12.10 The Big Bang Theory (R,HD). 12.40 PhoneShop (R,HD). 1.15 Facejacker (R,HD). 1.50 Noel Fielding’s Luxury Comedy 2.15 Chris Moyles’ Christmas Quiz Night (R,HD). 3.00 Meet the Parents (R,HD). 3.50 The Cleveland Show (R,HD). 4.15 Glee 4.55 Ugly Betty (R,HD).
Radio 1 6.30am The Radio 1 Breakfast Show with Nick Grimshaw 10.00 Fearne Cotton 12.45pm Newsbeat 1.00 Scott Mills 4.00 Greg James 6.00 Radio 1’s Dance Anthems with Greg James 7.00 Annie Mac 9.00 Pete Tong 11.00 Skream and Benga 1.00am Radio 1’s Essential Mix 3.00 Annie Nightingale Radio 2 5.00am Vanessa Feltz 6.30 Chris Evans 9.30 Ken Bruce Noon Jeremy Vine 2.00 Steve Wright in the Afternoon 5.00 Simon Mayo 7.00 Desmond Carrington: The Music Goes Round 8.00 Friday Night Is Music Night 10.00 The Radio 2 Arts Show with Claudia Winkleman Midnight Huey
12.00 Cop Squad (R,S). 1.00 Cop Squad (R,S). 2.00 Road Wars (R,S,HD). A surprise discovery is made on the M5. 3.00 Brit Cops: Frontline Crime UK (R,S,HD). 4.00 Dog the Bounty Hunter (R,S). 4.30 Dog the Bounty Hunter (R,S). 5.00 Airline (R,S,HD). 5.30 Airline (R,S,HD).
Morgan 3.00 Richard Allinson Radio 3 6.30am Breakfast 9.00 Essential Classics Noon Composer of the Week 70th Anniversary Special: Louise Farrenc 1.00 News 1.02 Radio 3 Lunchtime Concert 2.00 Afternoon on 3 4.30 In Tune 6.00 Composer of the Week 70th Anniversary Special: Louise Farrenc 7.00 Radio 3 Live in Concert: Temple Winter Festival. The BBC Singers, St James’s Baroque and conductor David Hill are joined by soloists Ruby Hughes, David Allsopp, Robin Tritschler and Neal Davies in Handel’s oratorio Messiah. 10.00 The Verb 10.45 The Essay: Let There Be Dark 11.00 World on 3 1.00am Through the Night
12.15 Knowing Me, Knowing Yule – With Alan Partridge Christmas special of the spoof chat show from 1995. 1.10 The Comic Strip Presents: Four Men in a Plane Squabbling sales professionals fly to a conference. 1.50 Bottom. 2.20 Harry Enfield and Chums.
Radio 4 5.30am News Briefing 5.43 Prayer for the Day 5.45 Farming Today 5.58 Tweet of the Day 6.00 Today 8.31 (LW) Yesterday in Parliament 9.00 Desert Island Discs 9.45 (LW) Act of Worship 9.45 (FM) Book of the Week: Darling Monster 10.00 Woman’s Hour 11.00 Maths and Magic 11.30 On the Rocks Noon News 12.01 (LW) Shipping Forecast 12.04 You and Yours 12.52 The Listening Project 12.57 Weather 1.00 The World at One 1.45 A Cause for Caroling 2.00 The Archers 2.15 Afternoon Drama: Borgen – Outside the Castle 3.00 Gardeners’ Question Time 3.45 Saki 4.00 Last Word 4.30 More or Less 4.56 The Listening Project 5.00
PM 5.54 (LW) Shipping Forecast 5.57 Weather 6.00 Six O’Clock News 6.30 The News Quiz 7.00 The Archers. Rosa speaks her mind. 7.15 Front Row. With guest Colin Firth. 7.45 (LW) Roddy Doyle’s The Snapper. Dramatised by Eugene O’Brien. 7.45 (FM) Roddy Doyle’s The Snapper 8.00 Any Questions? Political discussion, chaired by Jonathan Dimbleby. 8.50 A Point of View 9.00 A Cause for Caroling. The development of the Christmas carol tradition. 9.59 Weather 10.00 The World Tonight 10.45 Book at Bedtime: Aunts Aren’t Gentlemen. By PG Wodehouse. 11.00 Great Lives 11.30 Today in Parliament
12.00 The Fantasy Football Club (HD). A discussion on key fantasy football issues. 1.00 World PDC Darts Championship (HD). The start of the second round. 5.00 Darts Gold. Phil Taylor v Michael van Gerwen. 5.15 Darts Gold 5.30 Football League Gold 5.45 Football League Gold 11.55 The Listening Project Midnight News and Weather 12.30 Book of the Week: Darling Monster 12.48 Shipping Forecast 1.00 As BBC World Service 5.20 Shipping Forecast Radio 5 Live 5.00am Morning Reports 5.30 Wake Up to Money 6.00 5 Live Breakfast 10.00 Victoria Derbyshire Noon Shelagh Fogarty 2.00 Kermode and Mayo’s Film Review 4.00 5 Live Drive 7.00 5 Live Sport 10.00 Stephen Nolan 1.00am Up All Night Classic FM 6.00am More Music Breakfast 9.00 John Suchet 1.00pm Jamie Crick 5.00 Classic FM Drive 8.00 The Full Works Concert 10.00 Smooth Classics 2.00am Bob Jones
SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013 WEST COUNTRY LIFE 53
Puzzles and poetry
poem David Prowse
A VANISHING WORLD As a child, when the rain brought a closure to play And even the rabbits had fled, I simply adjourned for diversions elsewhere In the dark, dingy walls of the shed.
We can read about history, memorise dates But there's much facts, alone, can conceal, We can look at the pictures and hear it described But touching it renders it real.
It was known as the tractor house when we were grand But the name didn't give it its due, It was there before tractors, so ancient, in fact, That I doubt it had ever been new.
That shed held the keys to a vanishing world In more than one aspect of truth For just as elusive is the freedom to play And the vanishing wonders of youth. For book enquiries, including Call of the Wild, call 01752 600366.
Bits of old binders and reapers and rakes, A seed-drill still freckled with corn And yokes and horse-collars and shafts from a cart To which the old yeomen were born.
Now they were sources of play for a child Like the millstone that stood in the yard, Serving no useful purpose yet fiercely retained With a stubborn, nostalgic regard.
19 20 22
I'd heard old ones reflect on the way it had been Without tractors to lighten the load With a strange sort of fondness, a reluctance to part With the relics of yesterday's mode.
I didn't know why until absence and age Brought a longing for links that would last When I'd pray that the shed would remain like a shrine In which to recapture the past.
1 When the three guests arrived DOWN
1 A bird of prey has nested at the front of a of our village just outside steepled building in our village just outside Axminster (10) of Axminster (10)
1 When the three guests arrived at the large they looked around for hotelassistance in Portishead,(4) they looked around for assistance 2 I had (4) an affair with Reg – we’d
up half of open arable land 8 Exactly of Theale is made up of(3) open arable (3) 9 Iland experienced hatred at a top
2 I had an affair with Reg – we’d met whilst near around Great near Torrington (5,7) (5,7) travelling Great Torrington
9 I experienced hatred at a top institution in by a discriminatory system (9) Plymouth, caused by a discriminatory 10 I (9) live in Rowde – I’m strangesystem
3 I got this item of furniture Ikea right Ikea right in thefrom centre of in the centre of Cirencester, and I took an Cirencester, and I took an hour hourputting putting itittogether! (5) (5) together!
front of a steepled building in
institution in Plymouth, caused looking and something of an
chess Bob Jones
54 WEST COUNTRY LIFE SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013
at the large hotel in Portishead,
met whilst travelling around
3 I got this item of furniture from
oddball 10 I live in Rowde(6) – I’m strangelooking and something 11 Tim,of anaoddball top(6) doctor from
A van two customers 44A van ran ran into into two customers in front of in front of the post office the post office just outside of Pewsey (6)just
11 Tim, top doctor fromcultivated Edithmead, has a ina which he’s a neat front garden in which he’s cultivated a neat of(5) shrubs (5) line ofline shrubs
55I hear you you want want to visitto Penny Char- in I hear visitinPenny mouth to have a chat get up date with Charmouth toand have a tochat and the gossip (5,2)to date with the gossip get up
Edithmead, has a front garden
Knight 1-0 M Richards. 16 C Strong ½-½ D R Jenkins. Cor nwall’s previous match, against Hampshire, resembled a comedy of errors. A combination of illness and misunderstandings led to members arriving without any chess clocks, and their opponents turned up so late they would have been defaulted had there been any clocks. Eventually, some clocks were acquired locally and after lengthy negotiations between the two captains a match was played over 12 boards, which Cornwall won 75. However, it took several weeks of protracted discussion before the result was finally agreed by all parties. The details were as follows (Cornwall names first): 1 M Hassall v D Tunks (did not play). 2 J Menadue 1-0 T Davis. 3 R Kneebone 01 D Fowler. 4 S Bartlett ½-½ G Jones. 5 D Saqui 1-0 C Priest. 6 L Retallick ½-½ A Manning. 7 T Slade ½-½ Miss G Moore. 8 G Healey 1-0 B Kocan. 9 C Sellwood ½-½ S Le Fevre. 10 G Trudeau 0-1 J Young. 11 J Nicholas 1-0 R Ashmore. 12 R Smith 1-0 J Barnett. 13 D Lucas 0-1 S Murphy. Cor nwall’s website has recently been upgraded (cornwallchess.org.uk), and on it one can read, among other things, a fuller report on the match by the new match captain, Professor David Jenkins, together with his amusing and erudite Cornish chess adaptation of Henry V’s call to arms at the Battle of Agincourt, as imagined by Shakespeare. As Cornwall are doing so well lately, it must be working. Devon had better beware when they meet at Saltash in January. In last week’s ending, White wins by force: i.e. 1.Rf8+ KxR. 2.Qf7 mate. Here is a new two-mover by David Howard of East Harptree.
1 A bird of prey has nested at the ACROSS
8 Exactly half of Theale is made
Somerset has been in all-conquering form in recent years, but recently failed to overcome Cornwall, securing an 8-8 draw. The Cornish lost on the top four boards by 31 and the same on the bottom four boards, but scored six of the eight points available on boards 5-12, to level things up. The details were (Somerset names first): 1 J Rudd 1-0 M Hassall. 2 P Chaplin ½-½ J Menadue. 3 D Littlejohns 1-0 M Csuri. 4 M Richardt ½-½ S Bartlett. 5 B Morris 0-1 D Saqui. 6 C Purry ½-½ L Retallick. 7 A Footner 0-1 G Healey. 8 D Painter-Ko 0-1 T Slade. 9 J Fewkes 1-0 C Sellwood. 10 G Jepps 0-1 G Trudeau. 11 A Champion ½-½ J Nicholas. 12 M Baker 0-1 J Wilman. 13 D Freeman 1-0 R Smith. 14 N Senior ½-½ D J Jenkins. 15 R
wx 625 D
In its shadowy corners, on a dust-covered floor Stood the clutter of muscular toil, A latter-day testament long-since bequeathed By antiquity's sons of the soil.
13 I got my hat from a large
right by the riverside 13 I gotmarket my hat from a large market right by in the riverside in the centre of Charminster (6) the centre of Charminster (6) 15 After Oscar from Purton went to
15 After Oscar from Purton went to this top this top university, we all saw university, we all saw an extraordinary iman extraordinary improvement provement in him (6)
outside of Pewsey (6)
(5,2) 6 After head teacher James left our primary 6 After head Iteacher James left school in Dunster, struggled to make the our primary school in Dunster, I necessary adaptation to the change (12) struggled
in him (6)
7 Mynecessary three dogs needed to be taken to for a the adaptation walk, so I walked them around my village change (12) near Coleford (4,3)
hadn’t been served anything to
taken for loyal a walk, so I walked 12 They are very and committed at our top notch in Aust – I’ve been conthemchurch around my village near verted! (7) Coleford (4,3)
1717 Three hours hours after my after friends my first arrived Three friends at thisfirst café right in theat centre Llandaff, arrived thisofcafé right in they still beenof served anything to eat! thehadn’t centre Llandaff, they still (5)
eat! (5) through Balwest, a terribly 18 Whilst driving 18 car Whilst through large pulleddriving out in front of me (6)Balwest, a terribly large car pulled out in
21 My front nan gotof in me her car (6)and travelled to her final destination: agot villageinnear St Columb 21 My nan her car and Major (9)
travelled to her final destination: a village near St 22 Rob, a team leader from Loxbeare, Columb Major (9) (3) drowned in a river in Devon 22 Rob, a team leader from 23 After just three months livingininaTrigon Loxbeare, drowned river in last year, we moved to a place near LaunDevon (3) ceston (10) 23 After just three months living in Trigon last year, we moved to a place near Launceston (10)
7 My three dogs needed to be
12 They are very loyal and 14 I took my American friend to the large our pondcommitted just outside of at Exeter (7) top notch church in Aust – I’ve been converted!Rex (7)in Treen is someone 16 Unfortunately whoIdoes not yet their own home (6) to 14 took myown American friend the large pond just outside of 19 I Exeter needed a (7) piece of wood to fit into a mortise, so I got Saul, a leading carpenter 16 RexoneinforTreen fromUnfortunately Launceston, to make me (5) is someone who does not yet own their home 20 You can own see this centre(6) forward from Calne works out a – he looks of very trim (4) 19 I needed piece wood to fit into a mortise, so I got Saul, a leading carpenter from Launceston, to make one for me (5) 20 You can see this centre forward from Calne works out – he looks very trim (4)
Solutions on Page 56 WCL-E01-S2
Stars Claire Petulengro
cryptic crossword Cryptic ACROSS
ACROSS DOWN 9 Irritatingly, it reminds you of your fall from grace (4,5) 9 off Irritatingly, it reminds Had arrived, 10 Head and tear after the1supporter (8)it would youinof the your old fall from clearly be seen (6,2) 12 Shrewd way (4) 13 In “Cat s”, perhaps, or in another show grace (4,5) 2 Is lying back on the you may see them 10 Head off and(6) tear seat prepared to have 14 Give itafter back the (8) balance isa at zero(6) the and supporter snooze again12(7)Shrewd in the old 3 Find five hundred is a 15 Even when late? (4,5) way (4) hundred too many (8) 17 Says no more and finishes dressing (7,2) 13 about In Cats, perhaps, or (7)4 Trundle along on the 18 Talk a large dish another show you offspringstreet 20 Made in tea for the said (6) as you walk (6) may see them (6) that you’re 5 Notlate? obstructing 21 A pointed reminder (4) other 14 there Give it was back no and report the road users, being fair 24 Why on the shooting?balance (8) is at zero (8) 26 Unable to get of time ac- and again (7) away from the 6 topic Present commodation? (8)late? (4,5) 15 Even when again with words of 28 With make a mess consolation of it (4) (5,5) 17 hard-wood, Says no more and 29 I get taken advantage of and you think it’s finishes dressing (7,2) 7 Continue to try to get funny? (6) 18 Talk about a large been playing the TV working (5,2) 31 Smacked for having with 8 Tries to find out if the scissors?dish (7) (7) 20 Made for thehigh said with a sauce cutlerysonbeen 34 Game that’stea really it (9) 36 Stopping packing turning offspring (6) the cases and returned (6) it on (9)21 A pointed reminder 11 Hot and irritable (7) 38 Left inthat “To us Iran is terribly (7) youre late? (4) 16 illiberal” Theyre young? 39 The going south get moderately 24 masses Why there was no Rubbish! (6) hot sun (6) report on the shoot19 Wrong girl, for a start 40 Turn round, love, and you’ll see it’s iriing? (8) (5) descent (4) UnableEnglish, to get awaywith handouts 20 Saving for to get choco41 A 26 big ship, from late? (3) everybody (8)the topic of accommodation? 22 Photograph 42 Taking people such(8) as ourselves in is carrying really (6,3) 28wrong With hard-wood, in a little animal (3-2) make a mess of it (4) 23 She has the Eastern DOWN 29 I get taken advantage rival beaten (6) of and you think its 25 Recovered con1 Had arrived, it would clearly be seen (6,2) funny? (6) sciousness before the 2 Is lying back on the seat prepared to have a 31 (6) Smacked for having others landed (4,2,4) snooze been playing with 26 Pop too (3) 3 Find five hundred is a hundred too up, many (8) scissors? Half-listen the 4 Trundle along (7) on the street27 as you walkto(6) Game thats other really road users, Bachbeing composition 5 Not34obstructing fair (8) high with a sauce on having wine (7) 6 Presentit time (9) and again with 30words Being of leftconis rather solation 36 (5,5) Stopping packing the frightening (8) 7 Continue to and tryturning to getit the TV (5,2) cases 31 working Luxury commodity 8 Tries to find out if the cutlery’s been reon (9) brought only if theres turned (6) 38 and Leftirritable in To us Iran money over (8) 11 Hot (7)is terribly illiberal (7) 32 Hanging on to the 16 They’re young? Rubbish! (6) 39 The masses darn fish! (8) 19 Wrong girl, for agoing start (5) 20 Savingsouth to get get chocolate? moderately (3) 33 Stealing a sheet to 22 Photograph carrying in a littleput round the sick (7) hot sun (6) animal 40 (3-2) Turn round, love, and 35 The maids awfully 23 She has the (6)to ones peryoull seeEastern its irides-rival beaten young, 25 Recovered consciousness before the cent (4) turbation (6) others landed (4,2,4) 41 up, A big 36 Shuts up about one 26 Pop tooship, (3) English, with handouts having rights (6) 27 Half-listen to the for Bach composition everybody 37 A mischievous little having wine (7) (8) 42 Taking such 30 Being left ispeople rather frighteningscamp (8) and his antics 31 Luxury as commodity ourselves in is brought only (6) if there’s money over really(8) wrong (6,3) 32 Hanging on to the darn fish! (8) 33 Stealing a sheet to put round the sick (7) 35 The maid’s awfully young, to one’s perturbation (6) 36 Shuts up about one having rights (6) 37 A mischievous little scamp and his antics (6)
10 11 13
An emotive week makes it easy for you to break down and cry. Phone calls regarding your career can help you to ensure you make the right decision. You’ll get time to do your work now and show you are right to be selfish. Ring now for a message from Mars.
A great week to do a deal and to shape your life. Building or repair work, changes to where you live and investing in your appearance all help. Say how you feel before a certain person gets fed up with waiting. Ring now. We need to talk.
Quickcrossword Crossword quick ACROSS ACROSS 9 Like an uncle (9)
Work and play cross paths this week. You can ask questions normally deemed inappropriate. Your ruling planet Mars pushes you to ask for something you want temporarily rather than permanently. Make this clear sooner rather than later. Ring now.
10 Parlour game (8) 912 Like an (4) uncle (9) Weak 13Parlour Writing desk (6) (8) 10 game 14Weak Venetian 12 (4) boat (7) 15Writing Expressionless (9) 13 desk (6) 17Venetian Unprincipled moneylender, informally (4,5) 14 boat (7) 18 Level of command (7) 15 Expressionless (9) 20 Street entertainer (6) 17 21Unprincipled Travel permit (4)moneylender, informally (4,5) 24 Sample (8) 26Level Radical (8) (7) 18 of change command 28Street Simpleentertainer (4) 20 (6) 29Travel Paper permit handkerchief 21 (4) (6) 31 Non-professional (7) 24 (8) informally (2,3,4) 34Sample In difficulty, 26 (8) 36Radical Floodedchange (9) 28 38Simple Descent(4) (7) 29 handkerchief (6) 39Paper Live (6) 40Non-professional Continent (4) 31 (7) 41InLarge parrot (8) 34 difficulty, informally (2,3,4) 42 Singing voice (9) 36 Flooded (9) 38 Descent (7) 39 Live (6) 40 Continent (4) 41 Large parrot (8) 42 Singing voice (9)
By now you will have found out who you can trust and which signs have been feeding you a pack of lies. You’ll be able to see what needs to be done. New flirtations make your life a more interesting place to be. Ring now to hear what I see for your career. The stars push you into rash decisions and if you’re not careful you’re going to be creating a lot of mess. Damage limitation means saying what’s really on your mind. You’ll see fireworks, but you’ll also find respect. Ring me and I’ll show you your future.
Why is it that you’re telling everyone but the person involved how you feel? Stand tall and tell it like it is. This week, you’re fine tuning your life and communication is key to everyone finding time. Ring now to gain the energy Saturn is offering.
DOWN 1 DOWN Gemstone (8) 2 Root vegetable (6) 3 1 Gemstone Reference (8)(8) 4 2 Root Light vegetable wind (6) (6) 5 3 Reference Qualms (8) (8) 6 4 Light Asian country (10) wind (6) 7 5 Qualms Stain (7) (8) 8 Spanish woman (6) country 116 Asian Thieving bird (7) (10) (7)(6) 167 Stain Comfort woman 198 Spanish Expectations (5) (6) 2011 Thieving Proscribe (3)bird (7) 2216 Comfort Angry (5) (6) 2319 Expectations Risk (6) (5) 25 Type of property (10) 20 Proscribe (3) 26 Employ (3) 2722 Angry Readable(5) (7) 3023 Risk Better (6) (8) 25 Type of 31 Plentiful (8)property (10) 3226 Employ Heating device (3) (8) 3327 Readable Comments (7) (7) 3530 Better Sinew (6)(8) 36 Small creature (6) 3731 Plentiful Scuffle (6) (8) 32 Heating device (8) 33 Comments (7) 35 Sinew (6) 36 Small creature (6) 37 Scuffle (6)
With a really naughty influence from Mercury you could well be getting up to everything and anything behind closed doors. Plans for Christmas need to be run by all of those they would involve. Call to hear how I favour the instant attractions. You may have to rely on others to get jobs done. Although you won’t like the feeling of helplessness, it will offer you the chance to show you can work as a team. A younger person will be acting on all of your advice, so think before you speak please. The written word really shapes your life this week. Many of your sign will be taking their career and their home life to a new level. Your element of fire could see you casting judgement on new faces too soon. Careful, you could be ruining your prospects. Problems you would normally be able to sort out with both eyes shut are blown out of proportion. Don’t lose your cool, this testing time can show to those around you how good you are at mediating. Give me a call to tie up the past issue still on your mind.
Solutions on Page 56
You feel as if the past has come back to haunt you, but you’re wrong. It’s just reminding you how strong you are. Contacts and even legal dealings can go well for you even though you won’t realise it until later. The truth is you’re finding closure at last Aquarius. You find yourself being invited to places to which you’d normally decline an invitation. Open your mind. You’ve needed to blow away the cobwebs for some time and new faces are sure to make you appreciate all you have even more than you did before.
SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013 WEST COUNTRY LIFE 55
Where in the West?
Can you name and locate these five well-known West Country landmarks, as seen by Fran Stothard and Clare Green? Solutions below.
Across: 1 Hawkchurch, 8 Lea, 9 Apartheid, 10 Weirdo, 11 Hedge, 13 Trilby, 15 Upturn, 17 Unfed, 18 Estate, 21 Carnanton, 22 Exe, 23 Werrington. Down 1 Help, 2 Weare Giffard, 3 Chair, 4 Upavon, 5 Catch Up, 6 Readjustment, 7 Edge End, 12 Staunch, 14 Budlake, 16 Renter, 19 Tenon, 20 Lean.
1 A bridge in Puzzlewood, in the Forest of Dean. 2 Looking over a shoulder of the Willow Man beside the M5 near Bridgwater, Somerset. 3 The war memorial in Chippenham, Wiltshire. 4 The Millennium Square planetarium in Bristol. 5 The Holy Thorn in Wearyall Hill, near Glastonbury.
Across: 9, Hair shirt 10, Adhe-rent 12, Wise 13, Act-or-s 14, Rest-O-re 15, Dead level 17, Buttons up 18, P-L-atter 20, Brewed (brood) 21, Spur 24, Silencer 26, Dwelling 28, H-ash 29, Am-used 31, Clipped 34, Bad-mint-on 36, Cessa-ti-on 38, Insu-L-ar 39, S-warm-s 40, O-pal (rev) 41, Large-SS-E 42, Mortal-s-in Down: 1, Showed up 2, Si-esta 3, D-is-C-over 4, St-roll 5, Pass-able 6, There there 7, Press on 8, Snoops (rev) 11, Peppery 16, Litter 19, A-miss 20, Bar 22, P-in-up 23, E-lvira 25, Came to rest 26, Dad (rev) 27, Chab-lis(ten) 30, Sinister 31, Cash-mere 32, Dang-ling 33, P-ill-age 35, Disma-Y 36, Cla-I-ms 37, Impish
Across: 9, Avuncular 10, Charades 12, Puny 13, Bureau 14, Gondola 15, Impassive 17, Loan shark 18, Echelon 20, Busker 21, Visa 24, Specimen 26, Upheaval 28, Easy 29, Tissue 31, Amateur 34, In the soup 36, Inundated 38, Lineage 39, Reside 40, Asia 41, Cockatoo 42, Contralto Down: 1, Sapphire 2, Turnip 3, Allusion 4, Breeze 5, Scruples 6, Bangladesh 7, Tarnish 8, Senora 11, Jackdaw 16, Solace 19, Hopes 20, Ban 22, Irate 23, Hazard 25, Maisonette 26, Use 27, Legible 30, Superior 31, Abundant 32, Radiator 33, Remarks 35, Tendon 36, Insect 37, Tussle
56 WEST COUNTRY LIFE SATURDAY DECEMBER 14 2013
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West Country Life Magazine, Western Daily Press. Feeling festive. Real wreaths. Keep trimmings traditional.