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Ever found yourself in dire need of a wellplaced sob but lacking the necessary waterworks? Fear not! How to Cry Anywhere: An Improvisers Guide is the definitive handbook for shedding strategic tears in any scenario Whether you need a dramatic exit from a tedious wedding, an excuse to leave a childs birthday party before the cake is cut, or a diversion in the grocery store to avoid a persistent kumquat salesperson, this book has you coveredPacked with timehonored techniques like The Shakespearean Sob, The Silent Weep, and The FullBody Collapse, this guide ensures youll have a tear for every occasion Worried about getting caught? Theres even a section on how to convince skeptics that your performance is as genuine as a grandmothers cherished memoir (which, coincidentally, you can claim this book to be in case of emergency)So, grab a monogrammed handkerchief, stare wistfully into the distance, and prepare to master the noble art of the welltimed cry Now go forth, dear reader, and weep with confidence!