Editor’s Perspective
»» Learning to ««
Deal with
Mark Vaughn, CGCS Virginia Turfgrass Journal Editor
A
few Journal issues back, I made mention of some of the things they don’t teach you in turf skool. One of the big essentials (in fact, perhaps THE essential to longevity in this business), but potentially harder to handle than an outbreak of Pythium, is how to deal with DIFFICULT people. Let’s face it — it’s easy to deal with K.O.T.S.S.L.s, those humanoids that go around whistling “Keep on the Sunny Side of Life.” Type A’s or B’s, young or old, male or female, they all seem pretty comfortable in their own skin. Not comfortable to the point of superiority, just comfortable. But what about those who are not? The naysayers — those standing at the ready to shoot down any new idea on the radar. They don’t like the way things are, but they’re not about to change them. The doomsdayers — who insist that if we’d only listened to Chicken Little, we wouldn’t be in this mess. The Playaa’s — those who have watched too many episodes of “Survivor” and think that life is about backstabbing your way to the top. The Pharisees — who DO like the way things are, since they have total control. As a friend of mine once said, “My employers live by the Golden Rule. They have all the gold, so they make all the rules.” The little guys (and gals)
Difficult
PEOPLE — who have no control or influence in their everyday world, so by golly, they’re going to have some in yours. The pretty people — well doggone it, they can’t help it that they’re just BETTER than everyone else. They let us live in their world, but only to serve. The agitators, rabblerousers and instigators — who get their jollies by stirring the pot and watching it boil over. Probably played with gasoline and matches when they were young. The perfectionists (raise your hands along with me) — those who like things to be “just so,” which leads to perpetual disappointment. And finally, there are those who really can’t help it — they’re just nuts. Every golf course has members and every business has customers who fit this category. Some may be certifiable, and some may be like Michael Douglas in Falling Down and have had their limit for the day. Either way, when you cross their path, you’re stepping into the eye of the storm. So, how do you do handle all the non-K.O.T.S.S.L.s? And is it an innate talent, or can it be a learned discipline? To the second question, I would say yes and yes. There’s no question some people are born with the knack for this. I’ve been in meetings (as I’m sure you have) and watched those who are
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masters at this turn a pit of vipers into garden snakes. I’ve seen those who can manage a career at the “difficult club” for twenty years. But, just as some athletes are “born,” others work their butts off on their weaknesses until they become athletes. As a Type A redhead with Irish/ Scot/Welsh blood in his veins, I followed the latter course. Until not too many years ago, my first instinct when challenged was to bow my caveman back and dig in for a good fight. This attitude served me so well that I managed to earn a triple bypass before my 41st birthday. So, again I ask — how do you do it? Since academia won’t tell you, let me pass on what I’ve observed. 1. Find people who are good at it, and learn from them. I’m not talking about the perennial patsies who let everyone walk all over them. I’m talking about people who function in difficult situations regularly and still go home at night with their dignity intact. 2. Go to the bookstore, and start digging. There are many, many books on this subject. Yes, you may have to sort through some drivel, but usually there’s a hidden gem in almost every book. 3. Get your own act together —