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L awrence J ournal -W orld

Saturday, November 14, 2015

Dear Annie: My husband and I were close friends with another couple for 35 years. We took trips with them, attended their parties and invited them to all of our special occasions. About five years ago, the husband left the wife for another woman. He then retired and moved to a town 30 miles away. We still see him on rare occasions. When we do, he makes a point of saying something snarky and belittling to us. He might make fun of what my husband is wearing, criticize our new car or bring up a disagreement he had with me on a trip 17 years ago. We never know how to convey that his comments are hurtful and offensive. Do you have any suggestions on how to handle his behavior? — A Longtime Friend Dear Longtime: This

Annie’s Mailbox

Marcy Sugar and Kathy Mitchell

anniesmailbox@comcast.net

friend must feel guilty about his past behavior because he sounds defensive to us. He may think you are sitting in judgment and believes it makes his behavior more acceptable if he can drag you down to his level. The next time he belittles you, simply ask him politely, “Why do you need to say nasty things to us?” This will alert him that he’s not pulling anything over on you and it will also be a

Get to know the real Brando The 2015 documentary “Listen to Me Marlon” (8 p.m., Showtime, TV-MA) offers an “intimate” portrait in every sense of the word. The most acclaimed actor of his generation, Marlon Brando fiercely guarded his privacy. The star of classic films including “A Streetcar Named Desire,” “On the Waterfront,” “The Godfather” and “Apocalypse Now” went so far as to refuse an Oscar for “The Godfather” and send an unknown Native American w o m a n to offer a speech in his place. He lived for years on an island near Tahiti, preferring splendid isolation to Hollywood celebrity. Unbeknownst to the public, Brando accumulated a mass of confessional audiotapes. Sitting alone with a recorder, he poured out his innermost thoughts about acting, his troubled upbringing, his artistic mother and bullying father, their alcoholism and his inner turmoil. He reflects on his sexual bravado of the 1950s, his film triumphs and film failures, as well as his thoughts on life, death, acting and more. “Listen” marries these extraordinary recordings with a wealth of newsreel footage, TV interviews, news clips and scenes from Brando’s movies — good and bad. The result is as mesmerizing as it is illuminating. It’s a little like meeting the most chronicled movie star for the very first time. Sometimes Brando sounds like he’s talking to a therapist. At other moments it’s like a conversation with a lover. And in some moments his voiceover recalls Col. Kurtz from “Apocalypse Now,” the haunted, hunted madman at the center of the film.

Because the morbidity of “CSI” is so dated, the imported and dubbed French comedy “Spotless” (9 p.m., Esquire) stars Marc-Andre Grondin as a crime-scene cleaner trying to live a normal life with his wife and kids, when his brother (Denis Menochet) returns to embroil him in his life of crime. Tonight’s other highlights

A radio preacher’s reputa-

tion may not survive the revelation of a son born out of wedlock in the 2015 shocker “The Preacher’s Sin” (7 p.m., Lifetime).

Democratic presidential candidates debate in Des Moines, Iowa (8 p.m., CBS).

Lost footage found on a space station offers a horrifying tale on “Doctor Who” (8 p.m., BBC America, TV-PG).

Kelly’s family farm is trashed on “Ash vs Evil Dead” (8 p.m., Starz, TV-MA).

Raiders enter Cornwall on “The Last Kingdom” (9 p.m., BBC America, TV-MA).

Julie feels unsettled on “The Returned” (9 p.m., Sundance, TV-14).

Elizabeth Banks hosts “Saturday Night Live” (10:30 p.m., NBC, TV-14).

reminder to him for next time. He may have an explanation, but more likely, he will claim you misunderstood him. Dear Annie: You printed a letter from “Marie,” who asked where to find assisted living and nursing home facilities for out-of-state relatives. Your suggestion of medicare.gov was good. As a hospice nurse, let me give you more options. 1. The local county Office on Aging is set up to assist in these circumstances. They will send out a caseworker to assess the need and help find the best facility for the elderly person within their means. If there is any danger of neglect — self or otherwise — this agency is able to call in Adult Protective Services, which can expedite placement, if necessary. 2. Most hospice orga-

JACQUELINE BIGAR’S STARS

For Saturday, Nov. 14: This year you often stumble into fun scenarios that you don’t want say “no” to. You know when enough is enough, and you will step back at the appropriate times. If you are single, meeting people is a snap. If you are attached, the two of you love to have a good time. The stars show the kind of day you’ll have: 5-Dynamic; 4-Positive; 3-Average; 2-So-so; 1-Difficult Aries (March 21-April 19) You can’t seem to get into anything that doesn’t involve some fun. Tonight: Take a stand, if need be. Taurus (April 20-May 20) Deal with others directly. Understand what is going on with a loved one. Tonight: Try a new spot. Gemini (May 21-June 20) Friends will seek you out for feedback. You’ll move right in and offer solutions. Tonight: Time with a special person. Cancer (June 21-July 22) You might feel as if you have a lot to do. However, your self-discipline could float right out the window. Tonight: Reach out to someone. Leo (July 23-Aug. 22) You could have a sense of direction that surprises you as well as others. Inspiration comes from a friend. Tonight: You could go till the wee hours. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) Tension remains high,

nizations do not charge for an evaluation of their services. Hospice is not just for those in the immediate dying phase of life. By alleviating symptoms and promoting comfort soon after a determination of a lifelimiting illness, a person usually lives a longer and fuller life in the time he or she has left. Hospices have social workers on staff to help with living arrangements. The best way to avoid this situation is for all of us to complete an advance directive and a living will, and make arrangements for the time when we may be unable to care for ourselves, including filing the legal paperwork. Thank you. — RN in Carlisle, Penn. — Send questions to anniesmailbox@comcast.net, or Annie’s Mailbox, P.O. Box 118190 Chicago, IL 60611.

jacquelinebigar.com

but you’ll find the perfect outlet. Enjoying those around you seems to eliminate stress. Tonight: Tease a loved one. Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22) You might not know which way to go, but don’t feel as though you must make a decision right now. Tonight: Move the action to your place. Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21) Suddenly, you could realize that you are in a special place where you don’t have to worry about budget matters. Tonight: Hang out at home. Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21) Though you don’t often let go and party these days, today will be different. The old you has returned for a little while. Tonight: Make it your treat. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) You have a lot going on behind the scenes. Let others’ imaginations run wild. Tonight: You are the center of attention. Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18) Friends seem to surround you and encourage the loss of self-discipline. Be more spontaneous! Tonight: Not to be found. Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20) All eyes turn to you, as others are looking for suggestions and ideas for what they should do. Tonight: At a favorite place with favorite people. — The astrological forecast should be read for entertainment only.

UNIVERSAL CROSSWORD Universal Crossword Edited by Timothy E. Parker November 14, 2015

ACROSS 1 ___ up (relaxed) 6 One of the two genders 10 Do some bargainhunting 14 More depressed 15 Like some vaccines 16 Teen’s hangout 17 Three new things? 20 “Hold on a ___!” 21 Round flatbread 22 “Full” or “half” wrestling hold 23 Slinking carnivore 25 Docs for Dobermans 26 Dundee hillside 28 Made a pie chart 32 Heart hookup 34 Anjou, e.g. 35 “20/20” airer 38 Two new things? 42 “___ no hooks” 43 Measure of medicine 44 Checks for fingerprints 45 Readies a hard drive 48 Police officer’s patrol

49 Christian the fashion designer 51 Takes a backseat? 53 Northern Mexico state 55 Fast food staple 56 “Amazing Grace” verse ender 59 Three new things 62 Audition reward 63 Less than average tide 64 High abode 65 Raised racehorses 66 Raggedy ___ (some dolls) 67 Leveled, in London DOWN 1 Weakens, as support 2 Skin lotion ingredient 3 Extra fee 4 Hallow conclusion? 5 Window covering 6 Hod ﬁller 7 Song for a diva 8 Washroom, for short 9 Vivacity 10 Put on a happy face 11 Possessed, old-style 12 Butter alternatives 13 Schematic 18 Finger decoration

19 Jimmied 24 Tibet’s Sasquatch 26 Hindu gentleman 27 Fish eggs 29 Sleeper’s breathing problem 30 Dowel 31 Pilgrimage 33 Small country between France and Spain 35 Their job is taxing 36 Software prerelease version 37 Dermatological diagnosis, sometimes 39 “___ gloom of night ...” 40 Sufﬁx with “real” 41 Country hick

45 Deceived 46 Scouting groups 47 Missile “house” 49 Transplant need 50 Fireplace nook 52 Africa’s westernmost capital 53 Balkan native 54 “Black Beauty” author Sewell 55 Scottish family 57 Albanyto-Buffalo canal 58 ___ out a living (just got by) 60 Bear quarters 61 Positive reply

PREVIOUS PUZZLE ANSWER

11/13

MODERN TIMES By Rob Lee

11/14

THAT SCRAMBLED WORD GAME

by David L. Hoyt and Jeff Knurek

Unscramble these four Jumbles, one letter to each square, to form four ordinary words.

NALGC SAFCIO

NARPIS

Yesterday’s

Check out the new, free JUST JUMBLE app

Friend-turned-bully is probably just defensive

| 7A

Now arrange the circled letters to form the surprise answer, as suggested by the above cartoon.

(Answers Monday) Jumbles: STOMP ELDER ACCEPT HAIRDO Answer: The fashion model didn’t like her new competition and thought she — POSED A THREAT

BECKER ON BRIDGE