SABOTAGING YOUR SLEEP
6 HABITS EVERYONE SHOULD LET GO OF TODAY Experts agree that relinquishing these common but less-than-ideal tendencies can help you feel emotionally grounded. SHOPPING FOR HAPPINESS
“So much of our energy is spent chasing things we think will make us happy,” says Amy Johnson, Ph.D., author of The Little Book of Big Change. “The next vacation, losing a few pounds — they never lead to lasting happiness.” Teaching a niece how to read, having adventures with friends, working in a garden — intangibles like these give us real warm fuzzies. TRACKING WHO DISAPPOINTS YOU
We all remember who didn’t come to our party. “This ‘injustice collecting’ causes us to see the glass as half empty versus half full,” says Renee Exelbert, Ph.D., a licensed psychologist and a New York University adjunct professor. “Instead, embrace gratitude for those who do show up.” CONSTANTLY CHECKING YOUR PHONE
Put your smartphone facedown when you’re with loved ones. “We simply can’t focus after so much online time; it shortens our attention span,” says Whatley. Try practicing being where you actually are.
COMPARING YOURSELF TO OTHERS
“By learning to focus on ourselves instead of on others, we can decrease our stress and anxiety, increase our happiness and self-esteem and live a more purposeful and authentic life,” Exelbert says.
If you start another episode of Squid Game at 1 a.m. with a hectic morning to come, you’re engaging in what sleep experts call “revenge bedtime procrastination.” People who delay bedtime know it will lead to negative consequences but do it anyway, says Michelle Drerup, Psy.D., a sleep medicine specialist at the Cleveland Clinic. Drerup says she’s had an influx of patients who fail to go to sleep at a healthy hour despite facing zero barriers to doing so. Sound familiar? Try these techniques: 1 Rethink your schedule: Your late-night habits may be fueled by not having enough free time. Take a hard look at your day to work in “me time” long before bed. 2 Set a recurring a.m. alarm: Rather than prioritizing a certain bedtime, focus on waking up at the same time every day so your body’s internal circadian clock will naturally create sleepy feelings at night. 3 Turn off autoplay: Letting go of TV in bed is hard to do, but disabling the autoplay function on Netflix or Hulu can help. 4 Block yourself: A browser extension (such as RescueTime) or an app (like Freedom) can physically kick you off social media feeds or lock you out of your inbox at a certain time. — Erica Sweeney
NOURISHING GRIEVANCES
“Holding on to anger and repressing angry feelings may increase blood pressure and the risk of coronary heart disease,” Exelbert says. To switch gears, start journaling about all that’s going well for you. MANAGING EVERYTHING
Whether you’re dealing with a group project at work or planning a family reunion, it’s easy to fall into the trap of doing most of the work to ensure that the end result is perfect. But it’s time to let other people pick up the slack. “We go through life as if we’re responsible for every outcome we experience,” Johnson says. “We fail to recognize just how much happens effortlessly. Seeing what is working through us, for us, without effort needed, is a giant relief.” Allowing others to shoulder some of the burden will lower your stress, and you may be pleasantly surprised with the outcome — even if it isn’t perfect. JA N / F E B 2 0 2 2 G H
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Take Steps (Literally) to Quit Fighting When someone ticks you off and you respond by lashing out, that’s not healthy for you or your relationship. Walking away and ditching the anger will give you a better perspective and lower the toll on your mental and physical health. It doesn’t mean you have to be happy with the situation — it’s more about taking a breath to process, accepting what’s happened and then trying to calmly problem-solve.