Latest Seven: Issue 401 2 Dec - 8 Dec

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the city magazine for brighton & hove www.thelatest.co.uk

★ jobs ★ news ★ food ★ listings ★ tv guide ★ 2 – 8 December 2008

FREE WEEKLY

classic christmas st petersburg ballet theatre bring the nutcracker and sleeping beauty to brighton dome this christmas page 11

winter belles win a beauty pamper package for christmas

she’s a punk rocker julie burchill writes exclusively about zillah minx’s documentary lap of luxury lie back and salivate over our exclusive gift guide

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Contents

Welcome

★ latest gifts 4–10

It’s not really Christmas unless you can see a ballet.

Brighton Dome has two shows from St Petersburg Ballet – timeless classics The Nutcracker and Sleeping Beauty.

Latest readers can even get free tickets for children for matinee performances of The Nutcracker; see page 11.

If Christmas is on your mind, we’ve got our biggest gift guide yet in this issue. Turn the page for our seven-page luxury feature, ranging from skincare, champagne and Brighton calendars to fabulous, make-astatement jewellery, such as a Jeremy Hoye ring inspired by the Borneo jungle.

This has got to be one of the best weeks of the year for cinema in Brighton. Check out the film section for full listings for Cinecity, the Brighton film festival, and an exclusive piece by Julie Burchill about appearing in Zillah Minx’s documentary She’s A Punk Rocker UK (p26).

Part of the festival is Dance for Camera, South East Dance’s festival of screen dance films. See stage for our take on Billy Cowie’s new offering The Revery Alone (p28).

There’s great news for the city’s arts scene: Sussex University’s Gardner Centre is to have a multi-million pound refurbishment and reopen.

Find out more in Ralph Miller’s story (p18). Also in news, Phil Mills looks at how the case of a Brighton toddler paved the way for Baby P’s mother and step father to be successfully prosecuted for causing his death (p19).

In health, Zara Baker tries out new beauty salon Beautique Brighton and we have a 25 percent discount for Latest 7 readers and the chance to win a pamper package (p21). Ghyll Manor head chef Alec Mackins is back answering your cookery questions, email him with your Christmas queries (p23).

If you’ve got pre-school children, you’re likely to have heard of Roary the Racing Car. But did you know the character’s creator Dave Jenkins is from Brighton and used to work at Goodwood? Read Zara Baker’s interview with Dave on page 29.

Alabama 3 are playing at Concorde 2 tonight and tomorrow, Jeff Hemmings caught up with Larry Love when he was in Brighton for the festival fringe (p31).

In Latest Gay, I talked to John Hamilton, the chairman of Brighton and Hove (actually) Gay Men’s Chorus about why there’s a need for gay specific choirs, and Will describes going for a sexual health check up (p35).

Alison’s column, Andrew’s food page and the celebrity interview are not in this issue to make way for all our special features, but don’t worry if you’re a fan, they’ll be back next week.

In Latest Homes this week, we’ve got more Christmas shopping ideas (p11) and two agents pick out what they consider to be the most interesting properties on the market (p20 and p37). It’s the last week this year for some of our columnists, who will be taking a few issues off for Christmas but will be back in the new year.

4 Your luxury guide to stylish presents

★ latest listings 25–43 25 Reviews and listings index Nick Cave and Steve Coogan

11 Cover feature St Petersburg Ballet comes to Brighton Dome

★ latest jobs 12-13 12 Want more money or just a change?

26 Film Julie Burchill on being a punk, plus Cinecity Brighton film festival listings

28 Stage Preview of Billy Cowie’s The Revery Alone in the Dance for Camera festival

★ latest upfront 14–17

29 Kids and events

14 Social Diary and competitions:

29 Books

Powder beauty salon and Made 08

15 Bare Cheek: Brighton artists to watch 16 Model City’s Sandra moves to NYC 16 Dani yearns for fame 17 Celeb City: It’s a jungle out there

★ latest news 18–20 18 Gardner Arts to reopen and Sunday

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Roary the Racing Car creator Dave Jenkins interviewed John Davies loves Tom Bale’s new novel

30 Comedy What does Christmas mean for comics?

30 Art Christmas Artists Open Houses

31 Music Alabama 3 are coming to Brighton,

Latest Brighton Download Chart

TOP

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Market under threat

19 Phil Mills on how a Brighton case helped in the Baby P prosecution

plus a post-punk film and Powerplant

33 Clubs and music listings It’s the party season

20 Letters and Sport

★ latest lifestyle 21–24 21 Health: Beautique Brighton reviewed 22 Hotlist: which restaurants deserve your hard-earned pounds, plus Ghyll Manor

34 Gay Listings; Brighton and Hove (actually) Gay Men’s Chorus and Will on health

36 Television Dani’s verdict on the first episodes of I’m A Celebrity… and seven days of sofa surfing TV

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Editorial: editorial@thelatest.co.uk Advertising: lynne@thelatest.co.uk Managing Editor Bill Smith

Production Editor Victoria Nangle

Business Director Angi Mariani

Editor Rachel Pegg

Creative Director Andrew Kay

Assistant Editor Zara Baker

Production Director Fiona McTernan

Website Manager Paul Burgess

Finance Manager Sharon Caple

Music Editor Jeff Hemmings

Designers Rob Burdick Anand Day Peter Knight Steve Sawyer

Art Director Stephen King

Chief Sub Editor Alison Swann

Advertising Director Lynne Edwards

Production Manager Neil Ive

Listings Editor Nick Aldwinckle

Advertising Manager Marie Viviani

Photography Tim Richardson Diana Frangi

Advertising Sales Lucy Kamper Sophie Longhurst

Staff Writers Craig Driver Dani Winch

Administration Claire Peerless

Latest Homes Unit 1, Level 5 North New England House New England Street Brighton BN1 4GH

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Rachel Pegg Latest 7 Editor latest 7 3

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LUXURYGIFTS

Simply the best

_âåâÜç ❆ Gifts ❆ Now is the time of year to splash out on that special someone and make this a Christmas to remember

❆ Affordable luxury Beautyworks are offering pure luxury with over 60 percent off. Choose this Guinot Vital care gift box for only £29.95 (worth over £80). Discounted St Tropez sets also available and gift vouchers for any treatment or value.

Go to www.beautyworks.net/shop.

Beautyworks, Burlington Parade, Portslade, Brighton, BN41 2DJ (free and easy parking).

Call 01273 420198

Art of you

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Give a truly personal present with one of your images made into a piece of art. Big Art use artist quality canvas with a scratch and water-resistant coating, which are handstretched onto sustainable wooden bars. Prices from £15. Gift vouchers available. Free local delivery. Order in December and receive a free £10 gift voucher.

Simply email your images to sales@bigartcanvas or browse their image library at www.bigartcanvas.com. Big Art Canvas, 73 Trafalgar Street, Brighton, BN1 4EB. Call 01273 831113.

For the ultimate stocking filler you can’t beat a piece from Brighton’s premier designer Jeremy Hoye. A unique oneoff Tanzanite pendant from the Kustom collection. This piece, made by the master himself, is totally unique and comes with a numbered certificate. It is 18ct gold set with a triple A Pear shape rare Tanzanite. Over the 15 years Jeremy has been established these pieces have become very collectable.

This piece is priced at £6,175.

Jeremy Hoye, 22a Ship Street, Brighton, BN1 1AD. Call 0845 094 3175

Jungle love Jeremy Hoye has been busy this season, which has seen many aspirational pieces being made available.

This featured ring is from his Kustom collection. This bold piece is inspired by Lava and root formation of trees in the Borneo jungle, the branches reaching up to clasp the 7.02ct oval Tanzanite with the Black Diamonds growing in the shade of the stone. The ultimate Rock’n Roll ring! Priced at £9,975.

Jeremy Hoye, 22a Ship Street, Brighton, BN1 1AD. Call 0845 094 3175

Christmas wrapped up

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Escape the high street and browse through Cardigan’s winter fashion collection.

You’ll find amazing wraps, scarves, hats and gloves and the popular three-in-ones like the one featured here.

With gifts starting from just £25, it’s the chic, affordable, different way to do Christmas this year. Cardigan exclusive three-in-one with flowers £185.

Bring along this advertisement to enter the Christmas draw to win a gorgeous stripy Cardigan wrap worth £165.

Cardigan studio shop, Unit 5 Arundel Mews, 13-18 Arundel Place Brighton, BN2 1GG. Call 01273 671390. Mon-Sat 10am–6pm www.cardigan.ltd.uk

Special skin

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Give the gift for the ultimate in skin and body care to delight on Christmas morning.The perfect gift for a friend, relative and especially for the one you love. A beautiful gift box filled with fabulous products or a gift voucher for a pamper treat.

Beautique Brighton, 14 Ship Street, Brighton, BN1 1AD. Call 01273 711077 www.beautiquebrighton.com

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LUXURYGIFTS

Special silver

Especially for you Louis Roederer Champagne gift sets. Spoil someone special this Christmas with a stunning Louis Roederer gift set from the makers of the world renowned Cristal Champagne. The Gold Gift box contains a 75cl bottle of Brut Premier and the choice of two or four branded flutes.

With prices starting at £55 they make the perfect gift!

The Toast of Brighton & Hove, 40 Church Road, Hove Call 01273 208180. www.toastchampagne.co.uk

❆ Let me entertain you Louis Roederer Ice Bucket Gift Box. This stunning presentation gift box contains a beautiful silver plated ice bucket and a 75cl bottle of Brut Premier champagne. Priced at £120, it’s the perfect gift for those who truly love champagne and entertaining in style!

The Toast of Brighton & Hove, 40 Church Road, Hove Call 01273 208180. www.toastchampagne.co.uk

In the frame

Silver are now stocking Sheila Fleet designs which are a masterful combination of silver and enamel. FSDS is the exclusive stockist in Brighton.

Fiona Stewart Designer Silver, 52 High Street, Rottingdean. Call 01273 806680. www.fsdesignersilver.com

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The ultimate Christmas present is a piece of art from artrepublic. The Bond Street gallery has perfect Christmas gift ideas for that special present. Billy Rainbow is a beautifully printed silkscreen by legendary pop artist Peter Blake and comes hand-signed in an edition of 175.

Available framed at £960 and unframed at £795. artrepublic, 13 Bond Street, Brighton, BN1 1RD. Call 01273 724829 www.artrepublic.com

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Year in the city The last calendar by NL: Brighton and Hove Calendar 2009. Classic images, fun packed and something people actually want for Christmas.

Forteen photographers have images in the 2009 calendar. Over 60 great images at a farewell price of just £5 each. Simply a great present at a bargain price! North Laine Photography Gallery, Upstairs at Snoopers Paradise, 7-8 Kensington Gardens. (brightonphotography.com)

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Precious present

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Gold, frankincense and myrrh? We’re sure you'd rather have gold, diamonds and gemstones. Teeming with rare and unique collections, Baroque Bespoke Jewellery is the place to find a gift that will really impress. Luxurious and opulent jewellery hand-crafted by the finest goldsmiths in the country, these are gifts that will last and be remembered forever. These 18ct gold 'Beehive' rings by Phil Park come in various coloured gemstones and are pave set with diamonds. From £3,095.

Baroque Bespoke Jewellery, 9 Union Street, Brighton, BN1 1HA. Call 01273 777003 www.baroquejewellery.com 6 latest 7

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LUXURYGIFTS

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Sea gifts Enchanting silver seashell jewellery.

Handmade pendants, charms, earrings and bracelets feature in a collection of jewellery that includes an assortment of solid silver seashells and starfish that truly capture the essence of the sea.

Made locally, these beautiful pieces will delight for Christmas.

Seashells-she-sells direct on 07910 011050 or view collection and purchase online at www.seashells-she-sells.co.uk

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French fancy Unique versatile lariat necklaces designed and handmade in England by a small team passionate about their products. Made from semi-precious stones and Venetian glass in a variety of designs to suit all occasions.

Come and visit Pardon My French and bring colour, style and glamour into your everyday life. From £24.

Pardon My French,15 St Georges Road Kemp Town Brighton call 01273 694479 wwwpardonmyfrench.co.uk

Party princess

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Grab the exciting new Chloé Paraty bag.

The Paraty has been seen on everyone from Katie Holmes to Mary-Kate Olsen.

We love the shape and minimal hardware.

Shown here in black and python.

Exclusively at Area £1,795.

Area, 15 Brighton Place, Brighton. BN1 1HJ. Call 01273 732255

View to a thrill 18ct gold and silver jewellery embellished with precious stones by acclaimed designer Sophie Harley. Combining symbols from ancient myths with a contemporary twist, Sophie’s iconic designs have achieved a cult following of exclusive clients.

Commissioned for Casino Royale, these pieces exude an air of ‘Bondesque’ glamour. Items from £320.

Jewel Thief, 26 Dukes Lane, Brighton. BN1 1BG. Call 01273 771044

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Luxury reconstructed Based on themes of chaos and recreation, Kelvin Birk’s jewellery is formed from deconstructed sapphires, rubies, emeralds and other precious stones fused onto silver and gold structures. The result is innovatively designed jewellery, organic in nature yet luxurious in feel. Prices from £210.

Jewel Thief, 26 Dukes Lane, Brighton. BN1 1BG. Call 01273 771044

Gift of relaxation

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Whether it’s chilled out relaxation with a luxury hot stone massage or deep therapeutic work to sort out a painful back, a Natural Balance gift voucher makes an original and thoughtful Christmas gift. Gift vouchers are sent out by 1st class post in one to three days.

Buy online at www.anaturalbalance.co.uk or call 01273 771441.

Natural Balance Therapies, Suite 12, 30 The Drive, Hove, BN3 3JD latest 7 7

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If you are looking for a really special gift, or for a stunning piece of jewellery to set off a great new outfit, come to FSDS for exceptional service and personal shopping advice.

Fiona Stewart Designer Silver, 52 High Street, Rottingdean. www.fsdesignersilver.com Tel 01273 80 66 80

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LUXURYGIFTS

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Honey trap Stunning gold plated bumblebee necklace from UK jewellery designer of the year, Alex Monroe £140. Just one of the pieces available from a variety of beautiful collections in store and online this Christmas.

Silverado, 31 Bond Street, Brighton.

3B Kensington Gardens, Brighton Call 01273 735040. www.silverado.co.uk

Just for you Brass Monkeys has quickly established a reputation for selling beautiful, unusual and affordable handmade jewellery and metalwork.

Colourful earrings from recycled bottle tops sit alongside gemstudded gold cufflinks and silversmithing. Everything on sale is designed and handmade in the UK. Brass Monkeys, 109 Portland Road, Hove, BN3 5DP. Call 01273 725170. www.brassmonkeys.org.uk

Bring out the best Spruce offers the two most luxurious body treatments. The Dr.LeWinn's Cosmetic Lift Facial is the ultimate non-surgical face lift, and functions as a toning masque. Maintaining continual monthly treatments it has been found to help: diminish the appearance of fine lines and wrinkles; refine skin texture; reduce the look of puffy eyes; firm and smooth the skin; fade the look of age spots and sundamaged skin. All for £75.

The Rejuvenation Ritual: The ultimate state of relaxation and wellbeing. The treatment starts with a back cleanse, back massage and scalp massage. Then a deep cleansing facial using Dr.Lewinn's Classic Range, or for men, their brand new men's range, which includes a Recovery Masque, rebalancing your skin, leaving it bright, supple and refreshed. 90 minutes, £90.

Spruce,11 George Street, Brighton, BN2 1RH. Call 01273 696 893 www.sprucegrooming.com

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Soft touch

Beautiful beads

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Exclusive to Spiral Charlotte Borgen and Anna Beads.Handcrafted beads in a huge selection of glass, solid silver, semi-precious stones, sparkly cubic zirconia, and fresh water pearls. Beads start from as little as £5 and the bracelets start at £38, necklaces start from £24. All beads fit Pandora bracelets and most other designers.

Spiral 103 St James’s Street Brighton. Call 01273 667999

❆ ❆ Sensual style Inspired by the Orient, this silver lingerie collection adds a hint of glamour and elegance to your wardrobe this Christmas. Bra £21, G-string £8.50.

Yamamay at 57 Western Road, Brighton, BN1 2HA. Call 01273 727503.

Christmas unwrapped Sparkle this Christmas with the sexy moonlight collection at Yamamay.

Bra £15.55, G-string £8.50. Other models including nightwear, also available.

Yamamay 57 Western Road, Brighton, BN1 2HA. Call 01273 727503.

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Lelo Iris.This gorgeously graceful rechargeable vibrator is skillful and powerful in pleasure performance. Containing two individual and perfectly balanced vibrator engines, the Iris provides the smoothest, silkiest means for deep and sensual intensity intended for those special places. Comes in stunning presentation box, with silky pouch, universal chargers and ability to lock buttons so ideal for travel!

Nua Lifestyle, 59a Ship Street, The Lanes, Brighton, BN1 1AE. Call 01273 774001

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COVERSTORY

Christmas dance Indulge in a Russian dance spectacular for the festive season with the St. Petersburg Ballet theatre The glorious spectacle of Russian ballet is guaranteed to fill you with festive spirit, and this year Brighton Dome is delighted to welcome the wonderful St. Petersburg Ballet Theatre back with another enchanting programme.

In Christmas favourite The Nutcracker we follow Clara into a dream world where she is rescued from the clutches of the Rat King by the handsome Nutcracker prince. Together Clara and the prince journey to the Land of Sweets, where they meet the Sugar Plum Fairy and are entertained by a fantastic parade of dancing confectionery!

Another Tchaikovsky classic, Sleeping Beauty, tells the tale of Princess Aurora, cursed into a hundred year sleep by the wicked Carabosse. Aurora can only be woken by the kiss of a handsome

prince. This timeless tale of fairies, enchantment, romance and good triumphing over evil comes gloriously to life in this spectacular production.

Kids go free!

Free kids’ tickets for the matinee performances of The Nutcracker: Fri 26 Dec 5pm, Sat 27 Dec 2.30pm & Sun 28 Dec 2.30pm.

Two free kids’ tickets per adult.

Children must be accompanied by an adult. Call and quote ‘Latest Free Kids Offer’. Cannot be redeemed against tickets already purchased, subject to availability.

“Many people in the audience were seeing ballet for the first time, and it was clear from the ovation that followed the final curtain that they were thrilled by what they saw“ Dance Magazine, Japan The Nutcracker Tue 23 December 7.30pm, Fri 26 Dec 5pm, Sat 27 Dec 2.30pm & 7.30pm.

Mayor’s Charity Gala Sun 28 Dec 2.30pm Sleeping Beauty Mon 29 Dec 7.30pm, Tue 30 Dec 7.30pm.

Concert Hall, Brighton Dome Tickets for The Nutcracker and Sleeping Beauty are £10, £16, £22, £25.50, £28.50. Premium Seats £32.50. Children half price on top two tickets (excluding premium seats).

Call 01273 709709 or book online at www.brightondome.org

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latest

jobs

Call Marie on 01273 818150 ext 102

109 Western Road, Hove

724000 HARRINGTONS LETTINGS Independent Mortgage Advisor

Brighton

Our clients are a well established four-branch Estate Agency operating across Brighton & Hove who require a CeMap qualified Independent Mortgage Advisor. Our clients require a highly pro-active, professional individual who can demonstrate the ability and techniques to promote and develop the business.

Letting Negotiator

Burgess Hill

Our clients commenced operations in 1983, and through organic growth has become the largest firm of its kind south of London, and the rate of growth is increasing. You will be responsible for selling all company services strongly and ethically to landlords, tenants, and their advisers alike. Full driving licence is required, company car provided along with good earning potential.

everyone has a price on their head

to maximize your potential call us now on:

0845 130 1188 fax 0845 130 1189

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email enquiries@lca-jobs.com

web www.lca-jobs.com

DO YOU THINK THAT YOU ARE THE BEST SALESPERSON? IF SO, THEN APPLY TO ME TODAY! LETTINGS NEGOTIATORS (6 REQUIRED) VARIETY, CHALLENGE, JOB SATISFACTION, RESULTS, REWARDS! OVER ÂŁ25,000 OTE PER ANNUM (COMMISSION ONLY) Harringtons Lettings are currently looking for six full-time Lettings Negotiators on a commission only basis. You will ideally have some experience within the Letting industry but it is not essential. You will be someone who relishes a challenge, thrives under pressure, takes initiative, makes decisions and enjoys dealing with people both face to face and on the phone. You will be supplied with a substantial amount of property to let on a weekly basis and all of the tools to let them with. The position will be on a fully self-employed basis. You will be working 5 days a week 8.30am to 7pm every day. However, THERE ARE LARGE REWARDS AND MONEY TO BE EARNED.

PLEASE CONTACT MARK HARRINGTON AT MARK@HARRINGTONS-PROPERTY.CO.UK OR 01273 724000

hundreds of jobs every week

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CROSSWORD

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solutions on page 35

FULL TIME ADMINISTRATOR/NEGOTIATOR required for exciting launch of Brand Vaughan lettings department Applicants must be: • Highly motivated • Reliable • Well presented, with excellent customer service skills Lettings experience not necessary, however, a good understanding of IT is essential.

Must hold full driving licence Please send CV to lettings@brandvaughan.co.uk or for an informal chat contact Jason Brand on 01273 683111

Cryptic 172

Quick 172 DOWN

ACROSS 1 The swindlers' union (13) 7 Original Latin version with two i's (7) 9 Something to eat about midday and one (5) 10 Foreign drink taken from old building as a memento (8) 11 Engrave part of quiet church (4) 13 The way a flier gets thin (6) 15 Indian father in pain (6) 18 The last place on Earth to find man with big head (4) 19 Hard stuff goes against the island (8) 22 Passageway made of marble (5) 23 Clever cover for company in the red (7) 24 Doctor holds pen in peculiar fashion - straight up (13)

1 Fashionable chap or bird (7) 2 Sound feature with one interruption (5) 3 Key errand that's given out (8) 4 A little thing for one man (4) 5 One joins CID - it has nothing to do with being silly (7) 6 Beethoven's last piece of composition in the Dorian Mode (5) 8 Spy with no head for water (4) 12 Be particular about spice if brought back from Chinese capital (8) 14 Outdoor type given to circumlocution (7) 16 One who chooses unusual role, etc. (7) 17 Eats for party brought back from Foreign Office (4) 18 Wanderer returns painting to politician (5) 20 Former Conservative needs alliance with elderly Liberal leaders to do well (5) 21 Cow-house that's the work of Wren, lacking top or bottom (4)

ACROSS 1 Absorbent material (8-5) 7 Letting by contract (7) 9 Arranges (5) 10 Building (8) 11 Skittles (4) 13 Young bird (6) 15 Said (6) 18 Small lake (4) 19 Go forward (8) 22 Scout group (5) 23 Rock form (7) 24 Alteration (13).

DOWN 1 Be persuaded (7) 2 Hold forth (5) 3 Number (8) 4 Overtake (4) 5 Persevere (7) 6 Cultivated plants (5) 8 Virtuous (4) 12 Grow dull (8) 14 Italian boat (7) 16 Downward progress (7) 17 Amphibian (4) 18 Male name (5) 20 Select part (5) 21 Rafter (4).

To advertise call Marie on 01273 818150 ex 102 109 Western Road, Hove

724000 HARRINGTONS LETTINGS OFFICE JUNIOR / ADMINISTRATOR REQUIRED VARIETY, CHALLENGE, JOB SATISFACTION & PART OF A TEAM! £9K–£12K (DEPENDENT ON EXPERIENCE)

Harringtons Lettings are currently expanding and looking for a full time Office Junior / Administrator for their team of Sales Negotiators. You will ideally have some experience in the Lettings Industry but it is not essential. This is a busy varied role which would suit someone who relishes a challenge. You will be working five days a week 8.30am–7pm in a very busy and industrious office. This is a rewarding job and you’ll never be bored!

PLEASE CONTACT MARK HARRINGTON AT MARK@HARRINGTONS-PROPERTY.CO.UK OR

www.thelatest.co.uk/7

01273 724000 latest 7 13

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LATESTDIARY

COMPETITIONS Stevi, Em (Ophelia Fancy)

latestdiary

MADE08 success

With Tim Richardson Powder night On Thursday 20 November 2008, Powder Beauty hosted a ‘Glamour Night’ with champagne and cakes at their Beauty Boutique at 5 Duke Street, Brighton. Beauty demos ran throughout the evening with mini-manicures, facials, massages and make-up for only £5 on the night with a further 15 percent discount available on products and treatments that were booked on the night. There are a host of other treatments available at Powder Beauty as well a special 15 percent discount for students. Find out more by visiting www.powderbeauty.co.uk

Kate MacEwan (therapist), Kelly Bryant

On Thursday 20 November 2008, set in the beautiful splendour of Brighton’s Corn Exchange, the third year of the Brighton Craft Fair welcomed a name change to MADE08 – Brighton’s Design and Craft Fair and was supported by Latest 7 magazine, Coast Magazine, Barefoot Wine and treacle&co.

Organisers Jon Tutton and artist Sarah Young said, “The change is to reflect our commitment to cuttingedge design, as well as handmade craft, and to distinguish MADE08 from other local craft fairs.” Over 5,000 buyers visit the event each year with work priced between £20 and £1,500. MADE08 was an exciting showcase for the very best in affordable craft, design and applied art and the highest quality event of its type in the south of England. From delicate glassware to vibrant knitted textiles, elegant ceramics to contemporary furniture, it was the perfect opportunity for buyers to view and buy original, top class and often quirky pieces in a friendly and relaxed atmosphere.

Alice Brown, Rachel Kutscher (owner Powder Beauty), Lou Featherstone Amy Smith (Amy Ceramics)

Rachel, Jenny (She Said Boutique)

Sarah Ratty, Natalie Smith (Ciel) Fiona Howard (FiFi), Jon Tutton (Design and Art Fair Organiser)

Chrissie Nicholson-Wild (Curve Couture), Linda Garland with Chiqui, Mistress Dometria

Maggie Scott (Maggie Scott Textiles), Nigel Ryan, Pamela Mullins

IN IT TO WIN IT Win tickets to the ballet See St Petersburg Ballet Theatre in Brighton Win a pair of tickets to see the captivating St Petersburg Ballet Theatre, the popular touring Russian company visiting Brighton this December with their sublime 38piece orchestra. This year the company will be touring Nutcracker, Swan Lake and Sleeping Beauty, all masterpiece titles from Tchaikovsky.

A company of over 100 artists, SPBT is based in the exquisite ‘Officers House’ in St Petersburg. Internationally, they have performed in South Africa, Australia, New Zealand and Japan. Their productions feature spectacular sets, beautiful costumes, and outstanding dancers.

The prize is for a pair of tickets to the ballet of the winner’s choosing, plus merchandise including a DVD and soft toy. The ballet comes to The Dome, Brighton on Tuesday 23 December to Tuesday 30 December (no shows Christmas Eve and Christmas Day). The winner can choose to see The Nutcracker, appearing from Tuesday 23 to Sunday 28 December or Sleeping Beauty, which is on Monday 29 and Tuesday 30 December.

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Answer this question to be in with a chance to win: Who composed the world’s three most famous ballets, Swan Lake, Sleeping Beauty and Nutcracker?

See below for entry details. Entrants must be aged 16 or over.

To win, email: competitions@thelatest.co.uk with the name of the prize you wish to win in the subject box. Leave your answer to the question in the body of the email.

Don’t forget to leave your name, address and telephone number. Alternatively, write to us at the address at the front of the magazine. Closing date for entries: Monday 8 December

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ONLY JOKING!

See more at thelatest.co.uk

Bare cheek What’s not on Brian Mitchell and Joseph Nixon’s thoroughly scurrilous Brighton column

Movers & shakers Who are the hot young things currently making Brighton buzz?

Steve Blackberry (39) Brighton’s leading polymath – writer, composer, performer, organiser of artistic events, and lead singer of ‘Philpott’s Menagerie of Curious’ – there’s nothing that this man cannot do, except buy you a drink. His new venture for 2009, an Amicusportmanteau-horror-film-themed sex club mystery weekend and short story festival is sure to be a hit.

Jez Lemsip (22) The brains behind Radio Doomed, Brighton’s newest and least listened to local radio station.

Despite his father having found most of the money for the venture, sources reveal that he is still likely to be voted off the board at next month’s meeting.

Tara Veryposh (19) Eco-warrior, hunt saboteur, founder member of Plane Stupid, and nineteenth in line to the throne. Due to stand as Green candidate in the next local

election, thereby allowing the Tories to retain their majority.

Gavin Useless (35) White-hot young playwright, acclaimed for his plays about Winston Churchill, Brian Epstein, Edward Hopper, Linda Lovelace, Queen Victoria, Frank Sinatra, Diana Dors, and lots of other famous people who are easy to write plays about since the story and much of the dialogue exists.

Samantha Martin (23) Brighton’s foremost young painter – her St. James’s Street gallery, ‘37,’ is always bustling (with people who have come in to shelter from the rain) and her most recent sequence, ‘Famous People Painted Badly as if the Lack of Technical Skill Constitutes Some Kind of Comment on the Nature of Celebrity’ is a hit with pea-brained Londoners who need something to brighten up the walls of the flats they are frantically trying to offload before the excrement really hits the fan.

Astral Angi

★ Finding truth in the stars★

Film Deja vu-inducing Seth Rogan comedy you'd swear at gunpoint you'd actually seen before were it not for the fact that it's just been released (18) 12.00, 2.30, 4.30, 7.00, 9.00, 10.30 One of the not very good films that the Coen Brothers are seemingly contractually obliged to release between their good ones (15) 2.30, 4.30, 7.00, 9.00, 10.30 Romcom starring Ricky Gervais, because they couldn't get Will Ferrell. Or Jack Black. Or Ben Stiller. Or Owen Wilson. Or Steve Carell. Or Adam Sandler.

Or Eddie Murphy (U) 10.00, 12.00, 2.30, 4.30, 7.00, 9.00 Terence Davies going on and on and on about homosexuality and working class culture and liverpool. Again. (15) Caution: contains scenes that some viewers may find boring.

7.00, 9.00, 10.30

In & Out

Bafflingly excitement-andhumour-free Bond travesty with an unforgiveably pompous title (15) 12.00, 2.30, 4.30, 7.00, 9.00, 10.30, 12.00 Another film in which Michael Sheen turns up as someone from recent history that isn’t as scurrilous or hard-hitting as it likes to think it is (12A) 7.00, 9.00, 10.30

SPECIAL “EVERYMAN” EDITION

IN

OUT

• A.N. Other

• Joe Schmoe

• The Bloke Next Door

• Mr. Average

• John Q. Public

• Fred Bloggs

• John Doe

• Joe Sixpack

• The Man On The Clapham Omnibus

• The Man Down The Pub

Buy the CD Bardsley’s, country music with c-hip s-hop beats at Bardsley’s and Borders NOW!

This week Astral goes for gifts to get and give

BARDSLEY’S

WINNING FISH AND CHIPS 22/23/23A BAKER ST, BRIGHTON BN1 4JN

01273 681256

ARIES (MAR 21–APR 20)

CANCER (JUNE 22–JULY 22)

LIBRA (SEP 23–OCT 22)

CAPRICORN (DEC 21–JAN 19).

On the first day of Christmas Aries gave to me – an inconsolable feeling of deep, deep regret and bitterness. If you feel this too treat yourself to a partridge vol-au-vent.

On the fourth day of Christmas Cancer gave to me – four cauliflowers. In return I booked him in to have his ears waxed, legs waxed and a Bolivian helipad – don’t ask.

On the seventh day of Christmas Libra gave to me – nothing, simply nothing.

I immediately went out of my way to ‘up’ some swans for the occasion.

There is a letter to HRH in the post.

On the tenth day of Christmas Capricorn gave to me – goats cheese, home made and rolled in ashes from the hearth. I leapt around like a Lord in high dudgeon.

TAURUS (APR 21–MAY 21)

LEO (JULY 23–AUG 22)

SCORPIO (OCT 23–NOV 21)

AQUARIUS (JAN 20–FEB 19)

On the second day of Christmas Taurus gave to me – a roll of indescribably inferior sticking tape and a felt tip. Countermand this with some Dove soap and Turtle Wax.

On the fifth day of Christmas Leo gave to me – five cold things, the silly old fool. I replied with the appropriate number of rings but in something far more precious.

On the eighth day of Christmas Scorpio gave to me – a yeast infection which is where the milkmaids will come in handy with a ready supply of natural yoghurt.

On the eleventh day of Christmas Aquarians gave to me – an age of peace and good will. I gave them an album of Beatles hits played by the band of the Scots Guards.

GEMINI (MAY 22–JUNE 21)

VIRGO (AUG 23–SEP 22)

SAGITTARIUS (NOV 22–DEC 20)

PISCES (FEB 20–MAR 20)

On the third day of Christmas Gemini gave to me – reason to doubt my own sanity, seriously Gemini, stop messing about. I consoled myself with a trio of gallic foul.

On the sixth day of Christmas Virgo gave to me – a record token that had expired in 1987. Please resist the urge to goose your Virgo friends at this very special time of the year.

On the ninth day of Christmas Sagittarius gave to me – slippers and a pipe. I returned the favour with a voucher for a pole dancing club – so that should see him off.

On the twelfth day of Christmas Pisces gave to me – 12 pickled gherkins, 11 saucy sachets, 10 tiny whitebait, 9 breaded scampi, 8 calamari, 7 battered sausage, 6… off to Bardsley’s!!!

To talk to Astral Angi please email angi@thelatest.co.uk

latest 7 15

016_LS401_model city/dani

11/26/08

12:18 PM

Page 2

EMOTIONS

STYLE

Model city

Dani’s diary

Sandra Omo is packing her bag and reaching for the stars

Dani is living a life of self-doubt and a growing sense of underachieving

If there is one thing being a model has taught me, it’s how to expect the worst, and then act like it‘s normal. As funny as this may sound, it is the plain truth, even though is not exactly spelt out like this. When you attend castings and auditions, you are expected, or shall I say taught, to hope for the best – the possibility that you might be the one chosen for the job; while at the same time expecting the worst – the possibility that you might not be picked.

In addition, you are expected to take it as it is, and hope for another, thereby starting the process all over again. Hope, expect the worst, and move on. I am dying to know, when does the ‘expecting the worst’ part of it end, if it ever does? Isn’t there a stage that a model can reach and know that it is all ‘hope’ and ‘move on’ without expecting the worst?

What of supermodels, do they go through this as well? Well, I am tempted to think “no“, but due to the nature of the modelling industry, I know the answer is “yes“. The only difference is that supermodels do not have to attend castings and queue up to hear the decision. But the circle remains the same, and the impact greater.

Television and movies are to blame for many of us feeling let down by reality. We are bombarded with images of the perfect relationship, which immediately makes you doubt your own. We are also shown the perfect affair, which in turns makes you suspect your partner. We see perfect homes, perfect families, perfect friends, hair, bodies, teeth, skin and spend the rest of our time trying to achieve these goals that can only be written.

It’s a depressing enough world without the constant reminder that perhaps you haven’t got it quite right, that perhaps your partner is having a secret affair or that you are not in a good relationship at all.

I believe it is this that has made me high maintenance (I wouldn’t call myself that, but I have been called it many times in the past, which is odd considering all the relationships I have been in are ones where I didn’t actually get a choice in anything and just had to agree all the time – how that makes you high maintenance I will never know). But is it really too much to ask for things to be great as opposed to just good?

Photo: Pete Baldrey

“So for this model, no doubt she will become a model, as she dreamed, it is the level of success that she will achieve that is the question” Since there seems to be no rest from this circle for the ordinary model, what should be done? Should models just keep on hoping and expecting the contrary? If this is the case then, why don’t we hope big?

Years ago, I read the story of a model who dropped out of school, sold the house she inherited from her mother in this little town and moved to a huge city to become a model. Everyone thought she was stupid because there was no guarantee. True, but what step in life has an automatic success guarantee? If she sold her house to study, no one would ask why. In fact, they will praise her for it. But then I am dying to know, what is the guarantee that she will rise up to be a success at what she studied? It is the same here. The thing is, when it comes to us human beings, we, first of all, desire to achieve our dreams before we begin to pursue huge success. I desired to be a model before I began to dream about ‘Super-model-hood’ – first things first. So for this model above, no doubt she will become a model, as she dreamed, it is the level of success that she will achieve that is the question. Then at least, she pursued her dreams. Moreover, if models are expected to hope, expect the worst, and then move on, would it not be stupid to hope for peanuts? I mean, I would rather set my hopes high, and even if the worst happens, at least it was all worth it!

Today, I fall in this category. If I must run in this circle, it had better be for the best this industry has to offer. My bags are packed and I have this one way ticket to New York. And as I make another major move to pursue this dream, I am hoping for the best. Am I expecting the worst?

Not at all, there can be no worse in this step. However, there is one thing I know I shall definitely be doing, and that is moving on.

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“This makes life quite hard as I am consistently disappointed by the way things turn out“ I don’t think I am out of line to expect the amazing and mind blowing.

I could never see myself as someone who just settles, my own expectations of my own life have made settling an almost impossible feat. I am constantly restless and unhappy with the way things have turned out and I blame it all on my romantic view of the world (which is peppered with pessimism). My romantic view on the world stretches well past romance. When it comes to anything in life I have a warped Jane Austen view on it.

This does in general make life quite hard as I am made consistently disappointed by the way things turn out.

But, if I was offered the chance to have all those feelings taken away and feel happy with settling I would pass the offer up. Because of the way I am I feel mega highs and mega lows. If I gave up the lows I would have to release the highs and that would be sad. I am not the same as the majority. I never have been and frankly I don’t ever want to be. I think this all eventually stems back to my fear of being forgotten when I die.

I want to do something that will last forever. Just having my own family remember me is not enough because eventually they will lose their memories and at the same time me.

I hate the idea of fading into the background, but it is something I do very well.

This isn’t a moan. This is just fact. It makes me sad to think I am not doing something incredible. And it makes me feel weird that no one else seems to feel that way. How can everyone be so satisfied with everything they have? Do they not want more? Perhaps it is a combination of my age, my overactive imagination and my desire to be anything but average. Who knows.

For comments and chit chat email letters@thelatest.co.uk Collection/delivery ordering service for

IKEA goods Tell us what you want, and we’ll deliver it. Simple as that.

No traffic. No queues. No rows. No hassle.

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017_LS401_celebcity

11/27/08

11:43 AM

Page 1

AROUNDTOWN

sponsored by

Celebcity with Jo Brooks

Hair today It’s prizes all round for top hairdressers, eighties stars are in the jungle and Kelly’s got a hot dress Last Monday (why do all big celeb events happen on a Monday!) I attended a glittering awards ceremony held at the Grosvenor House Hotel in London’s Park Lane, announcing the winners of the 24th British Hairdressing Awards. The biggest event in the hairdressing calendar by far. I travelled by stretch Hummer with the team from the Brighton Trevor Sorbie salon. Travelling with us was one of the salon’s top stylists, Anna Chapman – who is no stranger to winning awards as she picked up last year’s best newcomer award. Anna was nominated again this year for Southern Hairdresser of the Year. Last year’s winner of the Hairdresser of the Year was Angelo Seminara of the Trevor Sorbie Covent Garden salon. Angelo was again up for this award but sadly was pipped to the post by Akin Konizi.

The evening was compered by Graham Norton who held court over two thousand guests from the world of hairdressing, fashion and media.

Entertainment was provided by soul diva and fashionista Mica Paris.

Jungle bunny Before going to press, Hove resident David Van Day was still stuck in the jungle, taking part in I’m A Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here! David (former Dollar singer) Van Day and Timmy Mallett, the presenter of the 1980s show Wacaday, were ‘kidnapped‘ on their way into the jungle as late entrants.

The pair joined other inmates including Martina Navratilova, Simon Webbe, Esther Rantzen and Carly Zucker. David had already had to face his fears of the dark and small spaces by taking part in various Bush Tucker trials, mostly involving the obligatory jungle critters.

Dressed to impress Kelly Brook looked a million dollars last week as she launched her new perfume. Not only did Kelly’s dazzling smile light up the cameras, so did her gold and crystal encrusted dress by Brighton-based designer Suzie Turner, which stunned the snappers. Brook was in London launching her new fragrance ‘Vivacious‘.

The Suzie Turner couture dress was made with real 24-carat gold Holland & Sherry fabric. Suzie is no stranger to dressing the odd celebrity as she also dresses Footballers’ Wives star Suzie Amy.

To comment on any of these stories or send in any news stories email editorial@thelatest.co.uk

Jo Brooks is director of Brighton-based PR company JBPR Ltd, 01273 622555, www.jb-pr.com

latest 7 17

018_LS401_newssummary

28/11/08

2:21 PM

Page 2

LATESTNEWS

news summary

7 days of headlines

The dates were set for the 2009 Labour Party conference. The Government will hold its annual conference in Brighton from Sunday 27 September to Thursday 1 October. The event is expected to bring £10million to the city economy, a boost for the visitor industry which provides 13,000 jobs. About 20,000 people are expected to attend. A secure island will be formed around the Brighton Centre, Grand, Hilton Brighton Metropole and Russell Road car park. Special car park passes will be given to residents and people in the city will have the opportunity to let their homes.

Sussex Police called for changes to the organisation of future Fatboy Slim gigs on Brighton Seafront. Big Beach Boutique 4 took place in Madeira Drive on 27 September and was attended by 22,000 people. Some complained of overcrowding and left early.

Norman Cook has said he would like to stage another gig in 2009.

Fifty people at this year’s event needed medical attention due to alcohol and drugs.

Gardner reopens Gardner Arts Centre is to reopen after a multi million pound refurbishment. Sussex University is to spend £3.8million to £4.8million turning the much-loved venue at its Falmer campus into a flexible auditorium, exhibition gallery, café and three studios.

It was closed in April 2007 after Brighton and Hove City Council withdrew a £30,000 annual grant and the Gardner was unable to meet criteria to attract Arts Council funding.

The Gardner Centre could be refurbished in time for the university's 50th anniversary in 2011-2012.

It will mainly be used for university performances and research, but external theatre groups will be able to use the facilities.

The university said it imagined the venue being used for workshops, conferences and residencies with international performers.

Professor Paul Layzell, deputy vice chancellor, said: “The Gardner building is set to become an exciting and stimulating venue for the exploration, presentation and study of creativity and the creative arts.“

latest 7

NEWS

Stallholders have collected 1,200 signatures against closures of Brighton’s Sunday Market.

The station car park event has suffered a series of cancellations including at short notice on 23 November. Network Rail say access has been required for replacement buses during engineering works. The next market is 7 December, but it will be cancelled the following weekend and further disruption is expected.

Coun Dee Simson, city council cabinet member for community affairs, said: “I’m out of pocket from lost income and I’d hate to see the death of the market. If people go one or two times without it being open, it will put them off”. A Network Rail spokesman said: “Our priorities, when undertaking improvement work, is the safety of the wider community and minimising disruption to passengers’ journeys.” Read more and comment at www.thelatest.co.uk Image credit: Jerry Lebens

Local support

Market protests

Brighton and Hove City Council leader Mary Mears on shopping close to home Starting this month, the council and our partners in the local business community are urging residents to ‘buy local’ to help traders through the looming recession.

Many people may be spending less than usual this Christmas, so we are asking people to try to make their purchases in local shops and businesses, wherever possible.

I know I will be staying away from big shopping centres outside of Brighton and Hove to make sure that my money stays in the city; I hope you can join me.

And if I do shop online, I will be using retailers based in Brighton and Hove, as well as trying to persuade friends and family who live outside the city to do their shopping here; it would be great if you could do the same.

Shopping locally will help boost the city’s economy because your money will help protect local jobs.

Supporting independent traders is particularly helpful as profits from these sorts of businesses are more likely to be re-invested locally.

The council’s ‘buy local’ campaign aims to build on our warmly received ‘recession-relief’ package, announced last month, and should further help local businesses weather the economic turbulence.

Lately national discussions have been dominated by talk of economic woes, but I think it’s important that we try to remain upbeat and remember that festive celebrations with family and friends are just around the corner.

With this in mind, I’m really looking forward to going to the annual Brighton and Hove Primary School Christmas Concert in the Brighton

18 latest 7

Centre on Wednesday. The concert involves a choir of over 1,300 children from over 40 schools across the city. This year is also set to include a special treat – with children from across the city reciting their poems on winter and Christmas, as part of Brighton and Hove’s ‘year of reading’.

It’s always a joy to see how proud and excited the children are to be performing in front of such a large audience. All previous concerts that I’ve been to have been wonderfully produced and I am sure that this year will be even better.

If you would like to comment on these stories please email news@thelatest.co.uk

019_LS401_newsphil

11/26/08

10:26 AM

Page 1

LATESTNEWS Phil Mills explains how the work of Brighton campaigners got justice for tragic Baby P

latest 7

NEWS

“I know the new law, sadly, will never stop these deaths happening but it does mean there will be better justice. And it means John did not die in vain.”

Dr Turner said: “Prior to the change in the law it meant people could get away with murdering children, all they had to do was remain silent or accuse the other person of being responsible, and because the court couldn’t decide which person was culpable, all would be freed.

Baby P Des Turner

Getting justice The successful prosecution of those responsible for Baby P’s death in Haringey is in no small part due to the campaigning of a small band of people in Brighton and Hove.

Without their efforts to change the law five years ago, the boy’s mother, boyfriend and lodger – due to be sentenced on December 15 – would most likely have faced less serious charges of cruelty.

As it is, the three have been found guilty of causing or allowing the death of Baby P, who suffered unspeakable brutality at their hands. The charge carries a 14 year maximum jail term.

John Smith

“It was perverse, but, thankfully, the campaigning has changed all that.”

Mr Bacon agreed: “I’m pleased the loophole was closed but it’s a pity other recommendations were not implemented, such as the sharing of information on children at risk between agencies and use of best practice.

“If a system of protecting children is working successfully in one part of the country it doesn’t mean it will be copied elsewhere.

“It’s a shame that’s not happening and I believe children would be better protected if it was.”

The same loophole allowed another couple to avoid murder convictions, despite being jailed for cruelty after the deaths of three children. The court heard how all three babies had probably been smothered yet the murder trial collapsed.

The baby’s aunt, who knew nothing of the law, stood in the winter rain and cold outside St Peter’s Church, gathering names for a petition demanding the government right this wrong.

John Smith’s aunt Linda Terry, launched the Justice for John campaign and his grandfather, James Sweeney, from Hove, visited John’s grave to tell him of

“The three have been found guilty of causing Baby P’s death thanks to tireless lobbying”

Cool kids

That charge was announced in The Queen’s Speech in 2003 thanks to tireless lobbying following the death of three babies in Brighton and, later, the death of four-year-old John Smith in Southwick – all at the hands of abusers.

The cases exposed a loophole in the law, which said that if it could not be proved who delivered the fatal blow, then all those at the scene at the time could not be convicted of murder.

As a result, murder charges were dropped against John Smith’s adoptive parents who, in the end, were jailed for eight years for cruelty. The boy had 54 injuries on his body and had suffered a catalogue of abuse before his death.

Brighton art students are the coolest in the country – putting Damien Hirst above Leonardo Da Vinci in their list of favourite artists, according to a new survey.

Leading examination board OCR surveyed more than 1,300 GCSE students nationwide, and in Brighton and Hove Hirst's eye-catching creations put the Mona Lisa and Van Gogh's Sunflowers in the shade.

Other artists to score well in the survey included ceramic artist Clarice Cliff (admired the most by 22 percent of Brighton and Hove students) and fashion designer Vivienne Westwood (11 percent).

And more than 44 percent of pupils in Brighton and Hove feel that art as a qualification is undervalued by employers in terms of the skills it can bring, while the same number of the city’s students believe that the skills cultivated in art help develop a more creative approach to other subject areas and ultimately their future careers.

Stuart Lunn, from OCR, said: “The diversity shown by Brighton and Hove’s students in choosing the artist they most admire shows how personal art and design is, and we’ve factored this into OCR’s GCSE Art and Design specification, to allow for such differences in students interests.

“As the course challenges Brighton and Hove's students to deliver thoughtful and imaginative responses to various project briefs...they also develop confidence, independence and a creative approach to problemsolving, all of which are valuable transferable skills.“

the campaign’s progress. He was able to report on its success before his death three years ago.

Many city councillors and residents backed the campaign and two then Home Secretaries, Jack Straw and David Blunkett, were lobbied, thanks to Kemptown MP Dr Des Turner.

Malcolm Bacon, retired Detective Inspector, who investigated both cases, went beyond the call of duty and attended conferences and Home Office seminars to bring out the facts of how many guardians and parents who were literally getting away with murder.

Ms Terry told Latest 7 this week: “Baby P’s case was just appaling but there is some satisfaction that the guilty have been brought to justice thanks to what we did.

latest 7 19

020_LS401_letters/sport

11/26/08

12:35 PM

Page 2

LATEST LETTERS&SPORT

Letters

Send your comments to

Latest Sport

letters@thelatest.co.uk

Round ups and rumblings from the Latest Sports Bunker

Giving birth to change Huge congratulations from everyone at Maternity Worldwide to our dedicated volunteers who recently returned to Brighton after successfully completing a tough sponsored bike ride through Ethiopia.

It’s cheering to know that some Brightonians were in the sunshine for a fortnight, though this was no holiday. They covered around 450km – the distance between Brighton and Manchester – often cycling at high altitudes and went on to visit our largest project in Gimbie, Ethiopia.

Our supporters had the opportunity to see for themselves that the hospital in the Gimbie region really is at the heart of Maternity Worldwide’s work in Ethiopia. Not only does it provide much-needed medical care but it is also a valuable source of potentially life-saving information for the surrounding communities.

In Africa one in 16 women can expect die in pregnancy or childbirth.

In the UK, this figure is one in 4,600.

What is most shocking about these figures is that the vast majority 80 percent - of maternal deaths in Africa are so easily preventable. They tend to be caused by injuries, infections or illnesses that are routinely and cheaply prevented in the UK. It’s amazing to think that a small charity in Brighton could save lives halfway across the world, but it’s true. As our volunteers can now attest, it is just a question of will and dedication.

Maternity Worldwide now has Christmas cards available to order.

Please visit www.maternityworldwide.org Julia Kukiewicz, Maternity Worldwide

It’s just not cricket Andy Winter warns that Twenty20 cricket could destroy Sussex County Cricket Club Sussex cricket has enjoyed unprecedented success over the last five years, winning its first ever County Championship followed by two further titles and winning two one-day competitions. For us faithful supporters, it has been a feast after decades of famine.

But can this success continue? The only thing we can rely on is that we can’t rely on anything that has gone before.

On the field Sussex have lost through injury Mushtaq Ahmed, arguably its greatest ever overseas signing and a unique member of the Sussex family. In the next season or three, solid performers such as Jason Lewry, James Kirtley and Robin Martin-Jenkins will come to the end of their careers. The future of Chris Adams, the club’s most successful captain, is uncertain.

Murray Goodwin is a run-machine, still hungry to score shed-loads of runs, superbly fit and injury-free. He could carry on for another decade.

But his future with Sussex is not certain because of his involvement in one of the Indian cricket leagues.

“It is Twenty20 cricket that may tear the heart out of English cricket and destroy the ‘family’ culture”

Thema’s an inspiration

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Luke Wright

Photograph: Clare Calder

You can also write to: Letters, Latest Homes Ltd, Unit 1, Level 5 North, New England House, New England Street, Brighton BN1 4GH

Sussex will continue to nurture talent and bring exciting young players through from the junior ranks and second team. But it is Twenty20 cricket that may tear the heart out of English cricket and destroy the ‘family‘ culture at Sussex.

Cricket has seen ‘revolutions‘ in the past (professionalism, the oneday game, and the Packer ‘circus‘). These have moved the game forward and enriched the cricketing experience and the finances of the game.

But what has endured and remains the foundation of professional cricket is the first class game and Test Match cricket. For players, these are the ultimate tests of cricketing achievement.

The grotesque $20 million Stanford Series, the Indian leagues, or whatever emerges next, provide lucrative opportunities for a dozen or so individual players from England and this could undermine dressing room coherence. Watch out for players who will miss the opening County Championship fixtures in favour of the Indian leagues.

Sussex appears to have, to date, successfully avoided dressing room conflict, not least due to the culture within the club and the impressive attitudes of Luke Wright and Matt Prior, the two Sussex players in England’s unsuccessful Stanford Series team.

Sussex, as the oldest first class club in the world, has a special role in ensuring the survival and health of the first class game. The County Championship remains the bedrock of a successful England Test team and Sussex continues to develop England players such as Prior, Wright, Adams, Kirtley and Mike Yardy.

The success of Sussex, fundamental to its ethos, is the spirit of the squad, the unity within the club, and the lack of factions among supporters and members. The challenge is to maintain its ‘family‘ ethos.

Photograph: Jon Cochrane

My dear Omo, I really appreciate this piece on this fantastic and gorgeously inspiring lady (Thema Davis, Model City, issue 397).

I am very happy that the almighty God turned things positively for her after the ordeal that she went through. There are so many other people that have one medical condition out there that needs help so desperately. Her message would surely lift them up and restore hope especially in a situation where there seem to be no help in sight. She is a winner and a proof that tough people do out-do tough times.

She is destined to help others and I only wish her all the very best and hoping that she would have the strength to forge ahead and visit as many people that are broken at the moment.

I am also very thrilled that through your interview in Model City, many of us, your admirers, would be encouraged to pass on the message that faith in God is all that we need to sustain our hope in the positives. I appreciate her sincerity and confidence. May God renew her strength always and provide her with all that she desires. Amen.

Thanks for sharing, Thema Davis and my warm love and regards to Omo Sandra Idugs.

You guys are great at Latest 7 magazine!

Dr Enobakhare Iyagbaye, Toronto, Canada

021_LS401_health/suzym

11/27/08

9:51 AM

Page 1

HEALTH

Beautiful people

al Season0% 1 offer: t on all discouns booked sessionfore 31 be ber Decem

Effectively assists with: Public Speaking Panic attacks Exam nerves Self esteem Smoking Phobias Weight management

Zara Baker indulges in pre-party pampering at Beautique Brighton, plus a chance for readers to win!

Beautique Brighton is a haven of luxury in the middle of the bustling lanes. I went along to meet Sarah Asgari, who manages the close-knit team at Beautique. Their treatment list is extensive, and while most customers may pop along for a St Tropez spray tan, massage or waxing, there are plenty of services to draw in clients. All treatments can be arranged in an individual package with some great deals available.

A visit is perfect for the festive party season ahead, with treatments available from top to toe. I was left in the capable hands of Sophie at Beautique, to experience a tailor-made pampering package, starting with the eyes. Well groomed and perfectly-shaped brows can transform the face. A warm waxing treatment was applied to the eyebrows to define their shape and get rid of stragglers you just can’t see with tweezers.

Treatment is quick and results last around four weeks.

A quick way to instant glamour is an eyelash tint that gives the effect of mascara without using any. Ideal for holidays too, a tint means you can skip a step in your daily make-up routine. A patch test is required 24 hours beforehand in case of a reaction. Cream and cotton pads were applied under the eyes to stop the tint reaching the skin. Blue/black tint was applied to the lower lashes and then the top and left to develop for five to 10 minutes. Shades depend on hair colour, the blue/black being the darkest. It is then cleansed away gently with mascaraed eyes as a result that last around four to six weeks.

Beautique also offer an eyelash perm that pumps up lashes for great effect, eradicating the need for false lashes for a night out.

The eyes taken care of, a luxury exfoliation treatment before a spray tan was an instant pick-me-up for tired skin. The Dermalogica product applied smelt gorgeous and natural, and exfoliated the skin ready for the spray tan. Its green aloe vera base means there will be no orange nightmare. The tan develops over eight hours and a healthy glow is the perfect remedy to beat the winter blues.

That, and a luxury OPI manicure while seated on the pink stools at the chic nail bar. A French manicure is traditional and chic and is the perfect look for parties and work. You may be tempted by the fabulous French OPI colours new to Beautique, with deep purples and reds, which are great for winter.

Friends can share the Beautique experience together in their double treatment room: A massage or a pampering facial is a great Christmas present to one another. Another must-have treatment for the party season is the OXYjet facial, eye or lip treatment – the Nora Bode OXYjet at Beautique is exclusive to Beautique in Brighton. Madonna’s a big fan of OXYjet and you can’t deny she looks great for her age. Skin, eyes and lips are boosted without Botox or surgery, as a shot of oxygen smoothes fine lines and boosts collagen.

For all these treatments and more, visit Beautique Brighton, 14 Ship Street, Brighton, 01273 711077, www.beautiquebrighton.com. Now’s the time to treat yourself.

New Year Resolutions

Free initial telephone consultation available London, Brighton, Hove & Forest Row Practices

Starting over Seven Stages of Relationship Breakdown Recovery (Part 2) by Suzy Miller 2 Shock I remember paying for my groceries at the shop, and my hand trembling so much I could hardly hold the money.

Even though you may feel like hiding away and waiting for the world to end, this is a time when sympathetic friends and some self nurturing is really important. Especially at Christmas!

3 Anger

Win a complete pamper package at Beautique Brighton & get 25% discount Latest 7 magazine has teamed up with Beautique Brighton to offer one lucky reader a complete pamper package. All entrants will receive a fantastic 25% discount voucher on the below treatments valid until 31 Jan ‘09 The grand prize includes: eyebrow shaping, eyelash tint, full body exfoliation, St. Tropez spray tan and an OPI file and polish.

Just answer the following question: Which popular spray tan does Beautique Brighton use?

Send your answers to competitions@thelatest.co.uk with ‘Beautique’ in the subject box or write to us at the address at the front of the magazine.

Don’t forget to include your name, contact address and number. Closing date for entries: 9 Jan ‘09. Entrants must be aged 16 or over.

If you would like to comment on this story please email editorial@thelatest.co.uk

I have never known such venom as what poured forth post relationship break up, even a year after the event.

Don’t think that telling your friends what a terrible person your ex was will help – telling them how you feel is great, but negative thoughts will exacerbate your moving through this critical part of the process.

Register on www.sos-village.org by Monday 22 December for free tickets to the Starting Over Show. Give them to a friend who may be in need of information and inspiration to help them start over from relationship breakdown or divorce. The Starting Over Show takes place 15 March 2009 at the Brighton Old Ship Hotel. www.startingovershow.co.uk

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LATESTHOTLIST

latest hot

LIST RESTAURANTS & BARS

RESTAURANTS BRITISH AND MODERN EUROPEAN Bardsley’s Probably Brighton’s most popular fish and chip shop and restaurant with a large loyal clientele. Totally traditional and family-run with all your favourites, but also an excellent blackboard of daily fish specials. They’re open for lunch and dinner Tuesday to Saturday and it’s also a great party venue.

There are massive fish platters and good seasonal seafood. Fish can be fried, grilled or poached, plus there are vegetarian choices.

22–23a Baker Street, Brighton, 01273 681256

The Coach House Friendly restaurant bar in the city centre serving an excellent range of hearty homecooked food, separate evening and lunch menus and always a selection of roasts on Sunday. Great mussels, steaks, soups and a good wine list. In the winter, a central open fire roars. In summer, people soak up the late sun on the pretty terrace.

The warm atmosphere and good value pricing make this a popular local haunt.

59 Middle Street, Brighton, 01273 719000 www.coachhousebrighton.com

The Gallery Restaurant Why not appreciate for yourself the brand new restaurant in the heart of Brighton’s lanes specialising in modern British food all within in a relaxed fine dining environment.

All the food is sourced locally, (where possible) homemade and designed for the seasons by our a la carte head chef who has lead at the Dorchester in London, amongst other leading London restaurants. The restaurant boasts a friendly yet casual environment that offers that little bit more all at very reasonable prices.

28 East Street, Brighton. 01273 773327 www.thegallerybrighton.co.uk

Purus Restaurant Purus is the award-winning 2 AA rosette restaurant, nestled in 40 acres of stunning landscaped gardens at the beautiful 16th century hotel, Ghyll Manor. Head chef, Alec Mackin, formerly of London’s renowned Savile Club, invites you, your friends and family or work colleagues to celebrate in style and make your festivities this season a sparkling success! Whether it be outstanding seasonal three-course lunches, private dining or festive party nights. Prices from £22.50pp.

High Street, Rusper, Horsham, 0845 345 3426, www.ghyllmanor.co.uk

Sevendials Restaurant A smart restaurant in so many ways, excellent food and a sensible variety of menus in chic surroundings. Chef Sam runs a team of food-lovers who deliver time after time, from a simple lunch to a full à la carte dinner. Cooking reflects the seasons rather

See more at thelatest.co.uk than fashion and quality is paramount, with great locally caught fish, game in season and desserts that are a delight, plus a wine list full of treats without being expensive. Make the most of the terrace when the weather is warm or the private dining room for a treat.

1 Buckingham Place, Brighton, 01273 885555, www.sevendialsrestaurant.co.uk

Sam’s of Brighton A brand new restaurant on the Kemp Town restaurant scene. Situated in the famous One Paston Place site, Sam’s offers a more relaxed dining experience. The dishes served are classic yet creative, with a focus on seasonal ingredients. Examples are natural smoked haddock and salmon fish pie with a free-range poached egg or chargrilled Scotch rib-eye steak with proper chips, plum tomato and house butter.

1 Paston Place, Brighton, 01273 676222 www.samsofbrighton.co.uk

CHINESE Gars Restaurant Stunningly refurbished, this old Brighton favourite has attained a new lease of life.

An exciting menu with some great new ideas and a wholly different experience in terms of style and presentation. Smart service, beautiful interiors and a truly chic atmosphere make this one of the city’s top places to be seen. Start downstairs at the bar before rising to the upper dining room and enjoy the glamour of it all. Eat from £10.

19 Prince Albert Street, Brighton 01273 321321 www.gars.co.uk

FRENCH The Arrogant Frog Until 20 November, there is a special twofor-one offer on main courses, Monday to Thursday (the cheapest dish is free).

Christmas day, Christmas party and New Year’s Eve menus are now available. Phone to receive your copy by email and book early to avoid disappointment. Not as expensive as you might think! A tempting à la carte and Xpress lunch is also available all week. A ‘Plat du Jour’, at £9.45 including a drink, is the perfect way to treat yourself without breaking the bank. Children and families always welcome.

119 Church Road, Hove, 01273 721488, www.thearrogantfrog.com

Cocoa Cocoa is the cheeky new French patisserie found just down from Brighton train station on Queen’s Road. “A slice of Paris in the heart of Brighton”. All cakes, pastries, tartines and baguettes are lovingly prepared each morning on the premises by French gourmet pastry chef Julien Plumart.

Front of the house is run by Jana Solfronk serving coffee, cinnamon hot chocolate or homemade lime ice tea, amongst other beverages. Intimate seating overlooking a mural of the roofs of Paris sets an atmosphere both relaxing and bohemian.

For breakfast, lunch or an afternoon “tete a tete”, Cocoa is the choice for discerning Brightonians. As commented by a recent French visitor: ”Cocoa make the best croissant in Brighton, by far better than any I found in Paris.”

48 Queen’s Road, Brighton. 01273 777412

New Steine Bistro Cosy French bistro with regular art exhibitions, creating the perfect setting for the appreciation of traditional home-made French cuisine either with friends or for a romantic night out. A hidden gem in the heart of Kemp Town, and very reasonable too!

Daily evening menu at two courses £10.50, three courses £12.50 on weekdays; and two

Sam’s of Brighton courses £14.50, three courses £16.50 on Friday and Saturday (ONLY LIMITED SPACES AVAILABLE DAILY). À la carte menu Tuesday to Saturday 6-10pm for last orders.

10-11 New Steine, Brighton, 01273 681546 or 695415

L’Églisese L’Église is a traditional French restaurant in Hove offering classic cuisine prepared for contemporary tastes. Offering a fantastic À la Carte menu Tuesday to Sunday together with daily specials like Saucisses de Toulouse, Boeuf Bourguignon and Côte de Bœuf for two. Locally sourced produce include freshly caught fish of the day and an extensive anglo-french farmhouse cheeseboard. There are also a selection of superb French desserts on offer such as Raspberry Millefeuille and Crème Brulée.

Whether enjoying our south facing sun terrace with the 2 course Express lunch menu, Tuesday-Saturday, 12-5pm at £11.95 or relaxing on a Sunday with our delicious French Sunday roast… this is true entente cordiale.

196 Church Road, Hove, 01273 220868, www.legliserestaurant.co.uk, info@legliserestaurant.co.uk

INDIAN Chaula’s “The food of India, not just Indian food.”

New on the scene in Lewes and unlike other Indian restaurants, Chaula’s is renowned for its signature dishes: bhindi kadhi, pista chicken, lamb rajasthani, and many more, and for its distinctive décor and friendly staff. All meals are made fresh to order and every curry has its own distinctively flavoured sauce. There is also a wide variety of vegetarian, vegan and gluten and wheat-free dishes. They have a buffet available 11am-3pm Mon-Sat, alongside a ‘light bites’ menu. It’s definitely a hot favourite with the people of Lewes!

Eastgate House, 6 Eastgate street, Lewes, BN7 2LP, 01273 476707, www.chaulas.co.uk

The Chilli Pickle The Chilli Pickle is a family run Indian bistro in the famous old lanes serving stunning food. Fronted by Brighton chef Alun Sperring, who has recently returned from Jumeirah in Dubai and has spent the last twenty years learning his trade around

the world. The restaurant has a relaxed and informal feel, with an emphasis on authentic Indian and Nepalese dishes using local and organic produce. The daytime menu offers Indian street food, Thalis and Masala Dosa, a selection of beautiful loose teas and cakes and sweetmeats. Dinner is a more refined affair. Feast on a Spiced Tandoor Baked Shoulder of Lamb, Moilly Seafood Pot or Duck Egg Masala to name a few. Paired with a carefully chosen selection of Belgian and micro brewery beers to include original India pale ale.

42 Meeting House Lane, 01273 323824 www.thechillipicklebistro.co.uk

ITALIAN Donatello The flagship venue of this local family-run business serving excellent value Italian food in stylish and spotless surroundings. It is popular with locals in the week but at the weekend it draws an audience from London.

There are brilliant-value meal deals on blackboards outside – two courses £6.95, three £8.95 – as well as à la carte. The haunt of celebs in season from soap stars to politicos. Fun, friendly and fabulous value.

Brighton Place, Brighton, 01273 775477, www.donatello.co.uk

Fat Leo Supposedly the budget branch of the Donatello stable but you’d be hard-pressed to see why. Once again, quality family dining in the Italian mould but a little less expensive. Popular with students and young families, Fat Leo has trendy interiors, including the toilets, and a menu which is utterly affordable with the signature setprice boards proclaiming any two courses £5.95, any three courses £7.95.

16-17 Market Street, Brighton, 01273 325135

SRI LANKAN Moonstone Sri Lankan Restaurant Moonstone is a family run restaurant brimming with authenticity and originality.

From the decorations to the menu everything about it radiates true Sri Lankan style. This gem of a restaurant is the

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LATESTHOTLIST Sawadee Cheer the spirit with a visit to this popular Thai restaurant in the heart of Kemp Town.

At Sawadee you can expect a warm welcome and an informal atmosphere in which to enjoy traditional Thai food from an established team. Each dish is freshly made and the menu offers a range of fiery red and green curries, colourful stir fry dishes, and specialities such as local sea bass drenched in a warming ginger and yellow bean sauce. Try large prawns in golden shredded coconut batter or fruity beancurd with pineapple and red tomatoes. You can choose a lovely crisp white or mellow red wine to accompany your Thai meal and there are three different popular Oriental beers on offer.

Don’t miss the great value set menus starting at £14.95 for a four-course, authentic Thai meal.

Sawadee Thai Restaurant, 87 St James Street, Brighton BN2 1TP, 01273 624233

COFFEE SHOPS Spinelli Coffee

perfect place for a relaxing and enjoyable meal for all the family. Sri Lankan curries are tasty but not necessarily hot! They are distinguished by being light, delicately spicy with an abundance of herbs and a dash of fresh coconut – tantalising to the palette and light to digest. Two courses £9.99 – Sunday to Thursday. They also cater for functions and private parties.

208 Church Road, Hove. 01273 202151 www.moonstonesrilankanrestaurant.co.uk

THAI Chokdee A premium takeaway and informal eaterie next to Hove Station where you can enjoy real Thai cooking. Chokdee serves a variety of popular Thai dishes, including tom yum soup, pad thai (stir-fried noodles) favourite red and green curries and a range of freshly stir-fried dishes, with vegetarian options.

There’s a selection of home-made starters priced from £3.95. A plate of mixed starters is good value at £8.95 and includes chicken satay, Thai fishcakes, mini spring rolls and mee krob noodles. Main courses include a good selection of vegetarian, duck and seafood dishes, and are made to each individual order using authentic Thai ingredients such as holy basil, kaffir lime leaves and galangal, coconut milk and chillis. Chokdee is licensed, with wines, saké and Thai beers. Open Monday to Saturday, for lunch and in the evening.

98 Goldstone Villas, Hove 01273 720370 www.chokdeethai.co.uk

Sabai The Thai word ‘sabai’ means comfortable, relaxed and chilled – precisely the way you’ll feel when you dine or have a drink with us.

Filled with stylish, genuine Thai furnishings, Sabai transports you to the beach bars of Samui or the contemporary restaurants of Bangkok. Browse our extensive menu of unique Sabai dishes, while sampling a cocktail or a bottle of wine from our comprehensive wine list. Try our gastronomic Thai food made with fresh, authentic ingredients – many of which are grown by the family of the restaurant’s owners back in Thailand. Come and enjoy – or as they say in Thailand: “Sanuk”!

165-169 Princes House, Princes Place North St, Brighton, 01273 773030 www.sabai.uk.com, bookings@sabai.uk.com

Spinelli Coffee combines the best of modern Italian café culture with greattasting, high-quality specialty coffee and mouth-watering pastries and savouries. A place where customers are attended to by a dedicated team of the very best baristas, whose driving motivation is to provide the ultimate ‘coffee experience’. Beautiful oak sliding doors look onto a heated outdoor seating area with sea views. Everyone can find a place to sit and sip, get wrapped up in a good book, take advantage of the free Wi-Fi or just relax. Spinelli Coffee is located in the heart of Kemp Town Village, just off the corner of St George’s Road and College Road. Mon-Fri 8am-6pm, Sat 8:30am-6pm, Sun 9am-5pm.

Spinelli Coffee, 24 Garnet House, College Road, Brighton, 01273 818819

Alec Mackins, head chef at Ghyll Manor’s award-winning two AA rosette restaurant, Purus, answers all your culinary questions Dear Alec, I am due to be hosting a dinner party for some friends who have sampled many of my dishes over the years. I’m now at a stage where I’d like to start raising the bar with the menu I create – do you have any dishes that will wow the regular guests at my dinner table? Peter, Saltdean Alec says: Peter, it’s great that you want to raise the bar to make it extra special for your dinner guests. I would recommend taking this process course-by-course, beginning with a starter that looks fantastic and combines new and exciting flavour combinations.

Salmon Riette Ingredients – Serves 4 ❖200g boned salmon fillets ❖1/2 packet of cooked beetroot ❖1/4 a celeriac ❖48 pea shoots (12 per person) ❖1/2 pint whipping cream ❖1 chicken stock cube

❖100ml balsamic vinegar ❖25ml olive oil ❖1/4 bunch of chervil ❖1/4 bunch of chives ❖white chilli powder ❖100g horseradish cream ❖salt and pepper as needed

Moksha Caffe Brighton Moksha is Brighton’s ultimate independent café, with their own blend of locally roasted coffee made by highly trained baristas. They have an excellent range of homemade cakes and sandwiches all made on site with favourites like battenburg, quiches and gluten-free options like pistachio and orange biscotti.

Moksha is not your usual high street coffee shop with its spacious interior and the works of local artists. They are child friendly, have disabled access and free WIFI. Free live music or comedy every Saturday night. Their opening hours are Mon–Fri 8am–7pm, Sat 8am–10pm, Sun 10am–6pm. Located opposite St Peters Church and only a stone’s throw away from Brighton Station.

Moksha Caffe, 4-5 York Place, Brighton, 01273 248890, www.mokshacaffe.com

BARS Koba Bar and Club Koba hosts a happy hour in the front bar between 5-7pm all week. With three bars over three floors and a dedicated team of mixologists, this venue stands as a flagship of quality and has been nominated in the top ten bars/clubs in the UK by The Independent. Good beers, a sensible wine list, and of course, champagne for special occasions (or just for the love of it). The perfect venue for a private party or an atmospheric night out. To book your private party, reserve your guestlist or to run through some ideas please contact: Koba, 135 Western Road, Brighton, 01273 720059, www.kobauk.com

Method Place the salmon on a baking tray, season with salt and pepper and white chilli powder, before drizzling with olive oil.

Put the salmon in a pre-heated oven at 160°c for 10 minutes.

Once cooked, leave the salmon to cool for five minutes.

Roughly chop the salmon, and finely chop the chives and chervil. Place the salmon, chives and chervil in a mixing bowl, add the horseradish cream and mix well.

Place this mixture in the fridge to set a little.

Peel and chop the celeriac and place in a pot. Add the cream, a chicken stock cube and approximately 100ml water. Boil until the celeriac starts to break down. When you are at this point, wait 10-15 minutes for the celeriac to cool – not cold – then blend until it is very fine. You might find you will need to add more water.

Check there is no root on the beetroot before blending to a very fine paste in a food processor with the balsamic vinegar, 25ml olive oil, salt, pepper and sugar to taste.

Assembling the dish Take a teaspoon of the beetroot purée and drag across the plate. Do this two or three times, creating parallel lines. Repeat the process with the celeriac purée. Place a pastry cutter in the centre of the plate and fill with salmon, pushing it down hard. Carefully remove the pastry cutter and decorate with the pea shoots.

To ask Alec a question, email: chef@ghyllmanor.co.uk Celebrate in style with friends or colleagues at Ghyll Manor this Christmas from £22.50pp* Visit ghyllmanor.co.uk for further information *(Not including alcohol)

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01273 687171

musicbar tues 2 dec 7.30pm £5/3

the space with josie long & edmond terakopian

wed 3 dec

we got soul

8pm £6

with the lmb all stars & special guest katie leone

thurs 4 dec

latest garage craze with

8pm £5/£4

long tall shorty + the dirty socials

fri 5 dec 9pm £9

singer songwriters at their best

8pm £2

9pm £6

sat 6 dec 8pm-2.30am £5

xdim a s nners & parties + weddings, civil partnerships, birthdays. call us and book the venue for FREE* *subject to conditions

sweet hove we got soul roy & tony’s with kingsize five club the new chicago rocking blues, foot tapping, hip swing jazz & cabaret swaying blues

now booking

pete & dud

7pm £10 or £20 w/ 2 course dinner

MyFirstDisco! djs & dancing for parents & their toddlers

2.30 – 4.30pm adult and 1 child £2.50

private party book your private party with ruth or angi on 687171

roast n jazz private party

sun 7 dec

three bonzos and a piano + robots

for show & dinner

show 7.30pm

mon 8 dec

apocalipstick spice is back!

tango lessons for all!

8pm £7/£5

a camp musical journey to the end of the world

7.30pm free dancing 9.30 £10 for lesson

members of the 6pm £12.50 or £20 original bonzo dog doo dah band

with sam chara & tom phelan 12.30pm–3.30pm £10 inc lunch

book your party with ruth or angi on 687171

gay tango workshop

thelatest.co.uk/musicbar 14 – 17 manchester street, brighton bn2 1tf. 100 metres up from the pier

check our website for full programme

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latest listings Your weekly guide to what’s on

2 – 8 December

Under review Here’s our round up of recent local shows, plus there’s oodles of reviews online at www.thelatest.co.uk Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds When on form, there’s no better live band in the world than the Bad Seeds. On this night, Hove’s favourite adoptive son and his formidable six-man gang veer tantalisingly close to their creative peak. New album Dig!!! Lazarus Dig!!! is a raucous, bloodied brawl fusing an old school preacher croon with the rusty sound of Cave’s Grinderman project. Live, these songs are just as powerful.

Old staples ‘The Weeping Song’, ‘Stagger Lee’ and ‘Tupelo’ receive majestically messy makeovers as ballads ‘People Ain’t No Good’ and ‘Straight To You’ retain their subtle elegance. Slightly unflattering acoustics prevent a classic Bad Seeds show, but this remains a remarkable night.

Brighton Centre, 23 November ✌✌✌✌ Nick Aldwinckle

One For the Road & Ashes to Ashes In this Pinter double-bill, the personal and political collided to create a menacingly oblique world with a dash of jet black humour.

Sparse staging and lighting expertly enhances both plays. In Road, a death-loving instrument of

an unnamed state interrogates a family for reasons never specified.

Ashes presents a conversation between a man and woman whose relationship keeps shifting and within which there are echoes of sadomasochism and the Holocaust. The staging was slightly static in Ashes; a well placed subtle gesture or movement could have brought the excellent text to life and illuminated some of its mysteries.

Acting was very good throughout but Jonathan Rice stood out as the terrifying interrogator.

Upstairs At Three & Ten, 20 November ✌✌✌✌ Simon Plotkin

Uprising/In Your Rooms – Hofesh Schechter Tribal movements, industrial beats, and strong, primal energy fused neatly to create an all-male dance piece anyone watching will always remember. Everything contemporary dance should be – exciting, energetic and raw – Uprising was cracking with a capital C. In Your Rooms presented a thoughtful work of the subconscious where male and female dancers sprinted across the stage, performing fast, fluid

HOT REVIEW OF THE WEEK Round The Horne Vintage radio comedy live on stage may sound mad but with a cast as strong as this it is a sure fire winner.

Classic scripts and popular characters were revived for a side-achingly funny evening of nostalgia. Unlike the previous show, this time we had a full band and Not the Frazer Haynes Four, a close harmony group who added musical interludes of high musical campery. The cast were brilliant, Robin Sebastian is Kenneth Williams but top marks this time to Sally Grace who played Betty Marsden superbly.

Theatre Royal Brighton, 18 November ✌✌✌✌✌

moves, accompanied by calming, philosophical musings and a brilliant live score. Choreographer (and dancer, composer and musician, no less) Hofesh Schechter is very hot in the contemporary dance world right now and it’s dead easy to see why. Smoking.

Brighton Dome, Concert Hall 18 November ✌✌✌✌ Monica Perdoni

Steve Coogan is Alan Partridge and Other Less Successful Characters Mr Coogan seemed to be on autopilot for the first half of this show – the ‘Less Successful Characters’ – which, on this evidence, aren’t going to become any more successful. I’ve always had a soft spot for Paul and Pauline Calf but they were reduced to innuendo and gypsy jokes, although Pauline’s ‘Marriott Hotel’ was very funny. Partridge was altogether a different beast; reinventing himself as a motivational speaker, impressing on us his life-changing philosophy which came to him after soiling himself in PC World. Brilliant stuff, but you can’t erase the memory of a patchy first half.

Brighton Centre, 21 November ✌✌✌ Simon Plotkin

Ida Maria That belting voice of hers was the highlight for me. The familiar songs got a great reception from the crowd, while lesser known and new ones felt a bit sluggish.

She did say something about being on tour for ever, but they still looked like they were having fun. A breath of grungey rock and roll air from the usually ‘fresh and clean’ indie that comes out of Scandinavia. Ida seems to have blended influences from Blondie amongst others and created raw but pretty pop.

Komedia, 18 November ✌✌✌

Dance for Camera Festival 2008, p28

26 Film Julie Burchill is a punk rocker; listings

28 Stage Dance for Camera Festival 2008; listings

29 Books Why choose book tokens this Xmas; listings

30 Comedy Victoria prepares a Christmas cracker; listings

30 Art Open Houses; listings

31 Music Alabama 3 bring country to the city; listings

33 Clubs Dates for the diary

Rob Burdick

34 Gay Will finds good health is made easy; listings

36 Television Dani hates it but she’s still watching I’m A Celebrity...; listings

Andrew Kay

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FILM www.odeon.co.uk

0871 224 4007 Tuesday 2

Thursday 4

BODY OF LIES (15) 2.30, 5.30, 8.30 CHANGELING (15) 1.30, 5.00, 8.15 FOUR CHRISTMASES (12A) 2.00, 4.30, 7.00, 9.15 GHOST TOWN (12A) 12.45, 5.45 HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL 3 (U) 12.30 MAX PAYNE (15) 3.15, 8.15 MY BEST FRIEND’S GIRL (15) 12.30, 3.00, 5.45 QUANTUM OF SOLACE (12A)2.00, 3.00, 5.00, 6.00, 8.00, 8.45 QUARANTINE (18) 2.15, 4.45, 7.00, 9.15 SOMERSTOWN (12A) 8.15

BODY OF LIES (15) 2.30, 5.30, 8.30 CHANGELING (15) 1.30, 5.00, 8.15 FOUR CHRISTMASES (12A) 2.00, 4.30, 7.00, 9.15 GET SMART (12A) 10.30 GHOST TOWN (12A) 10.40, 12.45, 5.45 HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL 3 (U) 12.30 MAX PAYNE (15) 3.15, 8.15 MY BEST FRIEND’S GIRL (15) 12.30, 3.00, 5.45, 8.15 QUANTUM OF SOLACE (12A)2.00, 3.00, 5.00, 6.00, 8.00, 8.45 QUARANTINE (18) 2.15, 4.45, 7.00, 9.15 SOMERSTOWN (12A) 8.15

Wednesday 3 BODY OF LIES (15) 2.30, 5.30, 8.30 CHANGELING (15) 1.30, 5.00, 8.15 FOUR CHRISTMASES (12A) 2.00, 4.30, 7.00, 9.15 GHOST TOWN (12A) 12.45, 5.45 HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL 3 (U) 12.30 MAX PAYNE (15) 3.15, 8.15 MY BEST FRIEND’S GIRL (15) 12.30, 3.00, 5.45, 8.15 QUANTUM OF SOLACE (12A)2.00, 3.00, 5.00, 6.00, 8.00, 8.45 QUARANTINE (18) 2.15, 4.45, 7.00, 9.15 SOMERSTOWN (12A) 8.15

BODY OF LIES (15) CHANGELING (15) FOUR CHRISTMASES (15) GHOST TOWN (12A) HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL 3 (U) MAX PAYNE (15) MY BEST FRIEND’S GIRL (15) QUANTUM OF SOLACE (12A) QUARANTINE (18) THE SAN FRANCISCO BALLET PRESENTS THE NUTCRACKER (U) TRANSPORTER 3 (15)

www.picturehouses.co.uk

01273 626261 Tuesday 2

Saturday 6

HUNGER (15) 1.30 PARIS (15) 11.00 SEE YOU TOMORROW (15) 6.30 WALTZ WITH BASHIR (18) 4.00, 9.00

I WAS BORN BUT... (18) 6.30 JULIA (2008) (15) 1.30 SALLIS BENNEY: SHE’S A PUNK ROCKER (15) 4.00 WALLIS AND GROMIT: THE CURSE OF THE WERE RABBIT (U) 11.00 WITHNAIL AND I (15) 11.30pm

HUNGER (15) 1.30 PARIS (BIG SCREAM) (15) 11.00 CABINETS OF CURIOUSITY: QUAYS IN CONVERSATION (15) 6.30 WALTZ WITH BASHIR (18) 4.00, 9.00

Thursday 4 HUNGER (15) 1.30 SALLIS BENNEY: BEN RIVERS/NICK COLLINS SCREENINGS (U/C) 8.00 SQUARING THE CIRCLE (PG) 6.30 WALTZ WITH BASHIR (18) 4.00, 9.00

Friday 5 DELTA (18) 6.30 INSTITUTE BENJAMENTA (PG) 11.00 JULIA (2008) (15) 1.00, 8.30 QUIET CHAOS (15) 4.00 SALLIS BENNEY: IAN HELLIWELL (U/C) 7.00

JULIA (2008) (15) 9.30 MILK (18) 6.30pm QUAYS DANCE SHORTS (12A) 12.00 QUIET CHAOS (15) 3.30 SALLIS BENNEY – THE DISAPPEARED (15) 6.00 SUSSEX ON FILM ARCHIVE SHOW (U/C) 4.00 TRICKS (15) 11.00am WHITE CHRISTMAS (U) 1.00

Monday 8 JULIA (2008)(15) 3.00, 9.00 THE BAADER-MEINHOF COMPLEX (18) 12.00, 6.00 CHECK WITH CINEMA TO CONFIRM FILM/TIMES

0871 200 2000 Tuesday 2

Thursday 4

BODY OF LIES (15) 11.50, 2.50, 5.50, 8.50 CHANGELING (15) 1.50, 5.10, 8.30 CHOKE (18) 9.20 FOUR CHRISTMASES (12A) 11.40, 2.10, 4.30, 6.50, 9.10 GHOST TOWN (12A) 12.50, 3.30, 6.10, 8.40 HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL 3 (U) 1.20, 4.00, 6.40 MY BEST FRIEND’S GIRL (15) 1.40, 4.20, 7.00, 9.30 QUANTUM OF SOLACE (12A) 12.00, 1.00, 2.40, 3.40, 5.20, 6.20, 8.00, 9.00

BODY OF LIES (15) 11.50, 2.50, 5.50, 8.50 CHANGELING (15) 1.50, 5.10, 8.30 CHOKE (18) 9.20 FOUR CHRISTMASES (12A) 11.40, 2.10, 4.30, 6.50, 9.10 GHOST TOWN (12A) 12.50, 3.30, 6.10, 8.40 HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL 3 (U) 1.20, 4.00, 6.40 MY BEST FRIEND’S GIRL (15) 1.40, 4.20, 7.00, 9.30 QUANTUM OF SOLACE (12A) 12.00, 1.00, 2.40, 3.40, 5.20, 6.20, 8.00, 9.00

Wednesday 3

Films showing Friday 5–Monday 8 BODY OF LIES (15) CHOKE (18) MY BEST FRIEND’S GIRL (15) CHANGELING (15) FOUR CHRISTMASES (12A) QUANTUM OF SOLACE (12A) TRANSPORTER 3 (15) WHAT JUST HAPPENED (15) CHECK WITH CINEMA TO CONFIRM FILMS/TIMES

www.worthingtheatres.co.uk

01903 206206 Tues 2- Thurs 4 Dec BODY OF LIES (15) 2.00 (Thurs), 8.00 (Tue–Thurs) CHECK WITH CINEMA TO CONFIRM FULL FILM LINE-UP FILM TIMES

26 latest 7

7 Selects

Milk (18) Dir: Gus Van Sant In 1977, Harvey Milk was elected to the San Francisco Board of Supervisors, becoming the first openly gay man to be voted into major public office in America. In 1978 he was shot and killed by a former city supervisor. Van Sant’s new film charts the last eight years

of Milk’s life from his decision to leave New York, to his involvement with the famous Castro Cinema. Sean Penn takes the lead alongside Emile Hirsch and Diego Luna in this excellent biopic. Van Sant on top form at last.

Showing at Duke of York’s Craig Driver

Sunday 7

www.cineworld.co.uk

BODY OF LIES (15) 11.50, 2.50, 5.50, 8.50 CHANGELING (15) 1.50, 5.10, 8.30 CHOKE (18) 9.20 FOUR CHRISTMASES (12A) 11.40, 2.10, 4.30, 6.50, 9.10 GHOST TOWN (12A) 12.50, 3.30, 6.10, 8.40 HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL 3 (U) 1.20, 4.00, 6.40 MY BEST FRIEND’S GIRL (15) 1.40, 4.20, 7.00, 9.30 QUANTUM OF SOLACE (12A) 12.00, 1.00, 2.40, 3.40, 5.20, 6.20, 8.00, 9.00

New releases reviewed

Films showing Friday 5-Monday 8

CHECK WITH CINEMA TO CONFIRM FILM/TIMES

Wednesday 3

L7 lowdown

The Baader-Meinhof Complex (18) Dir: Uli Edel This is a high octane look at Germany in the 1970s: the radicalised children of the Nazi generation lead by Andreas Baader, Ulrike Meinhof and Gudrun Ensslin are fighting a war against what they perceive as the new face of fascism: American imperialism supported by a German establishment predicted on Nazi traditions. Criticised by some for glamorising terrorism this is a slick but obtuse take on a brutal moment in German history.

Showing at Duke of York’s

Cabinets of Curiosity – The Quay Brothers On Screen & In Conversation (PG)

Dir: The Quay Brothers A rare opportunity to see a Quay Brothers selection on the big screen.

The three shorts on display are Street of Crocodiles (1986), Rehearsals for Extinct Anatomies (1989) and The Comb (1990). The trio will be followed by an in-conversation between the Quays themselves and film writer Gareth Evans.

Showing at Duke of York’s

Choke (18)

Director: Clark Gregg Adapted from the novel by and starring testosterone magnet Chuck Palahniuk this is an ingeniously offensive effort.

Sam Rockwell plays Victor Mancini, a medical-school dropout who scams money to pay for his Alzheimer’safflicted mother by pretending to choke on pieces of food in upscale restaurants. In his downtime Victor cruises sexual addiction workshops for action and spends his days working at a colonial theme park.

Showing at Cineworld and Odeon

She’s a Punk Rocker + Q & A (15) Director: Zillah Minx This insightful documentary explores punk from a female perspective.

Featuring interviews from the likes of Caroline Coon, Julie Burchill, Gaye Advert and Poly Styrene the film reassesses the movement from a gonad-free if not occasionally incongruous perspective. The screening will be followed by a Q&A with director and Rubella Ballet lead singer Zillah Minx.

Showing at Sallis Benney Craig Driver

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Punk princess Julie Burchill writes exclusively for Latest 7 about her part in She’s a Punk Rocker UK, a documentary by Zillah Minx When the ever-persuasive Miss Zillah Minx asked me to appear in her excellent documentary She’s A Punk Rocker I was not entirely convinced.

For a start, I think back to the period of my life when I WAS a – shudder – punk rocker as the only time of my life when I knowingly practised hypocrisy: one of my very least favourite vices.

I was a punk of convenience from start to finish. In 1976, when the New Musical Express advertised for a ‘hip young gunslinger’ and I had just turned 17, I realised instinctively that they were looking for some hot young blood to wet-nurse them, as it were, through the upcoming and somewhat problematic (to a bunch of wet, middle class hippies, that is) punk movement. The only music that existed for me was black music and punk was just about the whitest, most sexless and joyless sound I’d ever heard, but I threw away my dancing shoes and grabbed the safety pins PDQ. Thus began my short career as a hypocrite. But when you’re a stroppy, super-bright working class girl who knows that following one’s mater into the cardboard box factory is DEFINITELY not quite what one is dreaming of, you don’t have the luxury of taking decisions at leisure. Unlike the dreary, late-blooming offspring of the middling class, you don’t faff away your Fruit Salad chew days pissing around with ‘uni’ and gap years and sabbaticals until your mid-twenties. You see a ladder coming down from the ‘copter, and you run towards it – as fast as your bondage pants will allow, of course.

I remember a bit of stuff from that time – but very little of it to do with the glory of the actual music. I remember coming home to my scuzzy bedsit in – my dear, how divinely amusing! – ‘Crouch End’, my ears ringing with the latest vile white-thrash cacophony, and dancing round the room to the cleansing balm of the Isley Brothers. I remember vomiting in public for the first time – on Snakebite, on the stairs at the Roxy – and being agreeably pleased that not only was this type of behaviour not held in contempt but actually encouraged! And I remember that, against all odds, I emerged from it in 1979 with the bare bones of a proper career, as a proper writer, that has served me well to this very day. That was the bittersweet irony; that we banged on about us being nihilists and there being No Future, and it turned out that punk was one big stepping stone from the margins to the mainstream; as I write, John Lydon is advertising butter on TV.

Also showing…

A quick look at what’s on this week Changeling (15) Dir: Clint Eastwood Clint Eastwood continues his directorial career with yet another piece of Oscar-bait. Angelina Jolie plays a single mother in 1920s Los Angeles. After her child goes missing and is subsequently returned with one she is certain isn’t hers, she faces a corrupt LAPD and social alienation. Shades of film noir, melodrama and by all accounts a sterling performance from Jolie go to show Eastwood shows no sign of slowing down as he approaches eighty.

Showing at Odeon and Cineworld Choke (18) Dir: Clark Gregg From maverick author Chuck Palahniuk comes the subversively comedic tale of Victor Mancini: con artist, sex addict, angst-filled son, serial restaurant choker... and unsuspecting romantic antihero for our unsettling times.

Showing at Cineworld Four Christmases (12A) Dir: Seth Gordon Reese Witherspoon and Vince Vaughan star

as a couple whose plans for an exotic Christmas are thrown into disarray when the airport becomes fog-bound. Instead, they are forced to attend four family celebrations.

Showing at Odeon and Cineworld Ghost Town (12A) Dir: David Koepp When sociopathic dentist Bertram Pincus, played by Ricky Gervais, has a near-death experience, he finds he can see dead people.

Showing at Odeon and Cineworld High School Musical 3: Senior Year (U) Dir: Kenny Ortega Disney’s musical hit gets its second sequel.

Expect more of the same squeaky clean teens, old-fashioned song and dance routines and tweenie girls swooning over Zac Efron.

Showing at Odeon and Cineworld Max Payne (15) Dir: John Moore Film noir overtones and Matrix-style violence as a perma-frowning Mark Wahlberg avenges the murder of his wife and child.

Showing at Odeon

Needless to say, I found Miss Minx’s film far more diverting than actually living through that dirty old racket. Go and see it; you’ll gasp at Gaye Advert’s ageless beauty, you’ll thrill to Poly Styrene’s timeless piping and no doubt you’ll laugh at my relentlessly silly voice.

And then, if you’re anything like me, you’ll go home and say “Screw it – where DID I put that Isley Brothers CD…?“ She’s A Punk Rocker UK screens as part of Cinecity, the Brighton Film Festival, on Sat 6 Dec at 4pm at Sallis Benney Theatre followed by a Q&A with the film’s director Zillah Minx (lead singer with Rubella Ballet) and Poly Styrene of X-Ray Spex. www.cine-city.co.uk

My Best Friend’s Girl (15) Dir: Howard Deutch When Dustin (Jason Biggs) is dumped by his girlfriend of five weeks (Kate Hudson), he’ll do anything to get her back. Luckily best friend Tank (Dane Cook) is a rebound specialist hired by men to take ex-girlfriends out on bad dates to show their men weren’t so bad after all.

Showing at Odeon and Cineworld Notcalifornia (u/c) Dir: Richard Gregory Brighton has a vibrant surfing community as this documentary sets out to demonstrate. Six years after its initial release, Notcalifornia is

getting its own DVD release with this free screening to mark its launch.

Showing at Walkabout, West St, 7.30pm, 3 Dec Quantum of Solace (12A) Dir: Marc Forster Daniel Craig’s Bond is on a quest for revenge after the death of his love, Vesper Lynd. The trail leads him to sinister environmentalist Dominic Greene (The Diving Bell and the Butterfly’s Mathieu Amalric), who is trying to control a country’s water supply. Judi Dench returns as M while new Bond girls Gemma Arterton and Olga Kurylenko simmer.

Showing at Odeon and Cineworld Quarantine (18) Dir: John Erik Dowdle Hollywood remake of Spanish film REC. TV reporter Angela Vidal is following a fire crew when they respond to a routine call, which turns out to be anything but routine.

The group find themselves trapped in the building when it is put under quarantine.

Showing at Odeon WMD (TBC) Dir: David Holroyd Exclusive screening of this political thriller about an M16 desk officer who discovers holes in the government’s argurment for invading Iraq.

Showing at Sallis Benney Theatre, Sat 6 Dec

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Dancing on the ceiling Ralph Miller takes a sneak preview of Billy Cowie’s The Revery Alone ahead of its world premiere at South East Dance’s Dance for Camera Festival 2008.

The Revery Alone is a seven minute, music and dance installation using a 3D projection of a solo performance by Swiss-Iranian dancer Eleonore Ansari. The performance, recorded on two cameras, is projected onto the ceiling as the audience lies on the floor beneath (like an IMAX cinema with extremely reclined seats). The red/blue anaglyph glasses

STAGELISTINGS

Tuesday 1 to Monday 15 December BRIGHTON DOME

EASTBOURNE: CONGRESS THEATRE

01273 709709 www.brightondome.org Semantic Assembly Presents Kinship & Their Stagehands Two new comedies from Cardinal Newman School. Semantic Assembly Presents Kinship is a play within a play, giving a backstage glimpse at rehearsals. Their Stagehands is a humorous insight into the lives of the people who make the show happen.

• 5 Dec, 7.30pm, £10

01323 412000 www.eastbournetheatres.co.uk Cabaret Discover life is a cabaret with the hit show that premiered on Broadway over 40 years ago. For ages 12+. Contains male nudity.

• 2–6 December, 7.30pm, plus Thu, Fri and Sat matinees 2.30pm, £17.50–£30

THE CAPITOL, HORSHAM 01403 750220 www.thecapitolhorsham.com Elmer Songs and magic for ages 3–5, with Elmer the multi-coloured patchwork elephant.

• 12 Dec–4 Jan, daily except 15, 25 Dec & 1 Jan. £10 adults, £7.50 children, £2.50 babes in arms.

CHICHESTER FESTIVAL THEATRE 01243 781312 www.cft.org.uk A Christmas Carol Chichester Festival Youth Theatre present Charles Dickens’s popular tale.

• 13–28 December, except 14, 19 & 25 December £7.50–£23

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EASTBOURNE: WINTER GARDEN 01323 412000 www.eastbournetheatres.co.uk Johnny Spice Swing Orchestra & Vocalists Ballroom, swing and jive dancing or just sit and enjoy the big band sounds.

• 6 December, 7.30pm, £15.50

THE HAWTH, CRAWLEY 01293 553636 www.hawth.co.uk Sixteen Up An intimate and witty take on the complexities of first love. For ages 14+.

• 2 December, 2pm and 7.45pm, £tbc

NEW VENTURE THEATRE 01273 746118 www.newventure.org.uk The Man Who Was Hamlet The story of

create a 3D holographic effect, tricking your mind into believing that the dancer is actually hanging from the ceiling above you. So convincing is it that I couldn’t help worrying that the elegant and gracious hologram above me might slip out of the projection and fall on top of me.

Ansari’s naked body moves in a slow, graceful but haunting manner, her hands and feet gripping four handles, which both restrict and define her movement. The simple movements are captivating, and seem to be amplified by their dilatoriness. The unclothed figure’s movements are choreographed and have sculptural feel, but on occasion her eyes catch yours and her accusatory expression bring home the human emotion and makes you feel as if you are experiencing the performance live rather than watching a film.

It is a fascinating piece, utilising a challenging medium. The Revery Alone combines the movement of the human body at its most basic and pure level with a complex 3D medium. Being placed below the performance in an almost submissive stance compels you to feel more engaged and even become a part of the experience. Though whether this effect can be sustained with a larger audience remains to be seen.

Composer, choreographer and film-maker Billy Cowie has been working with this medium for the last two years, and his previous installation In the Flesh used similar techniques. Cowie now combines his extensive composing, choreographic and film careers with a position as a principal research fellow at the University of Brighton. He has so composed music for many performers and several BBC Radio projects including an adaptation of Philip Pullman’s Dark Materials trilogy. He is currently working on another 3D projection piece called Ghosts in the Machine.

Other highlights at the three-day festival include Forward Motion, a collection of some of the best and most innovative British screen dance performances; and New York, New Work, a selection of four new international films commissioned by the Experimental Performing Arts and Media Centre in Albany, New York.

For more information visit www.southeastdance.org.uk. Dance for Camera Festival 2008 runs from Friday 5 until Sunday 7 December. Performances and installations take place at the Lighthouse Digital Lounge, 28 Kensington Street, Brighton, BN1 4AJ and The Sallis Benney Theatre, University of Brighton, Grand Parade, Brighton, BN2 0JY. Tickets: www.brightonticketshop.com, 01273 709709 and Box Office: 29 New Road, Brighton, BN1 1UG. The Revery Alone installation will be on display at the Lighthouse from 2-11 December and is open 10am–6pm. Contains nudity. Recommended for over 14s.

Edward de Vere, 17th Earl of Oxford whose life of scandal and tragedy echoes that of Hamlet.

• 2–6 Dec, contacts venue for times/£ It’s A Wonderful Life The story of George – a kind man driven to the point of suicide only to realise the effect he had on others. Based on the uplifting film, presented as a ‘radio play.’

• 13–21 Dec, contacts venue for times/£

WORTHING: CONNAUGHT THEATRE

THEATRE ROYAL

WORTHING: PAVILION THEATRE

08700 606650 www.theambassadors.com/theatreroyal The Wizard of Oz An alternative to the Christmas panto – the spectacular family musical on stage. Follow the yellow brick road!

• 5 Dec–4 Jan, 2.30pm, various show times and prices – please contact the venue for details. No shows 11, 18 & 25 Dec, & 1 Jan

01903 206206 www.worthingtheatres.co.uk Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs Traditional panto telling the popular fairytale story of Snow White. (Pictured) With Mark Little.

• 11 Dec–4 Jan, daily except 17, 25 and 31 Dec. Please contact venue for show times.

UPSTAIRS AT THREE AND TEN 07786 984900 10 Steine Street, Brighton Playing Life One woman show blending theatre and live jazz to tell the story of having the courage to move on from the past.

• 2–3 Dec, 8pm, £tbc Santa Maybe Set in Ireland exploring love and loyalty. Does a husband’s generous gifts express love or merely cover guilt over infidelity?

• 5–8 Dec, 8pm, £tbc Lebenskuenstler Family ties are unravelled in this story of relationships and mathematics – the laws that bind the universe together.

• 15–16 Dec, 8pm, £8/5

01903 206206 www.worthingtheatres.co.uk Jack and the Beanstalk Panto season is here with a traditional show for all to enjoy.

• 5 Dec–4 Jan, various show times and prices – please contact the venue for info.

Daily except 25 Dec and 1 Jan.

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KIDS&EVENTS

Roaring success

BOOKS

Write club

Zara Baker talks to Brighton dad Dave Jenkins, creator of the phenomenal kids show Roary the Racing Car Roary the Racing Car is familiar to most pre-school children. The popularity of the animated show has spawned a spin-off in merchandise that’s certain to grace the Christmas wish list of many a small child, including my godson’s. I was keen to find out more about the creation of Roary and discovered it all began right here in Brighton, an idea of local dad Dave Jenkins.

With a history of working in motorsport at Goodwood and Brands Hatch, Dave, who is Brighton born and bred, made the move to work at popular children’s channel Nickelodeon. “At the time (1999), Nickelodeon had just launched the Nick Jr. Channel and I had a 15month-old son Tom,” Dave says. “Tom didn’t watch a lot of TV but he did love to sit down with his dad and watch the F1 Grand Prix racing on the TV. I started to make up stories about the cars to keep him on the sofa. This went on for a few weeks before I literally had a massive eureka moment; if my son loved the stories I’m sure other kids would love the stories. So I started to jot down the characters and the settings by drawing heavily on my motorsport and kids’ TV experience.”

Roary the Racing Car spent a year in development and come late 2000, Dave had a production concept ready to present to broadcasters and producers.

“Peter Kay has been an immense part of the popularity of the show, especially amongst adults” As Commercial Director for Nickelodeon, Dave gave the channel first option to produce the show, but ultimately it was Chapman Entertainment who went on to develop the show and got Channel Five (Milkshake) and Nickelodeon to commission the series.

There’s a familiar voice for adults, with popular comedian Peter Kay voicing the character of Big Chris on the show. “I think Greg Lynn, the MD of Chapman Entertainment, said ‘who’s the best comedian in the country?’” Dave says about Peter Kay’s involvement. “We all answered Peter Kay. We never thought we’d get Peter involved but as with so many things in life, and unbeknown to us, he was actively looking for the right kids project to get involved with.” A match made in animation heaven, then? “Peter Kay has been an immense part of the popularity of the show, especially amongst adults who watch with their kids.”

When asked about the appeal of Roary for its pre-school audience, Dave responds: “I was very keen for Roary to be a pre-school show with pace, action and thrills and spills. Most pre-school TV is gentle and soothing, but I wanted something that reflected my own experience with my own toddler who was a typical bang and crash boy... my daughter’s been no different!” The brightness and vibrancy of the show teamed with loveable characters is a big part of its appeal. “It also has a brilliant writing team that gently raises issues that are starting to be meaningful to a pre-school audience and their parents.”

Dave left Nickelodeon earlier this year, leaving him free to spend more time with his family and to develop more concepts. “I really needed a break and change of scenery to recharge my batteries.

It was also a big incentive to spend a summer in Brighton with the kids.”

So, what’s next for Roary the Racing Car? A big screen outing? “Perhaps...” Dave replies.

“I think Roary would lend itself to the big screen because it’s got big characters – and there is the world of motorsport personalities to tap into. We’ll have to wait and see.”

Catch Roary the Racing Car daily on Five’s Milkshake! at 7.05am and 4pm on Nick Jr. Visit www.roarytheracingcar.com for all the show info and merchandise available.

For complete listings go to thelatest.co.uk

John Davies finds the ideal gift to buy this Christmas is book tokens as an enticing new read gets a January release Skin and Bones by Tom Bale is published on 1 January 2009. It should be a record year for Christmas book token sales because this book is the one to wait for – a very rare occurrence and one to be celebrated for all kinds of reasons. It’s quite simply the best book I’ve read this year.

Populist thriller – certainly. Amazing page turner – definitely. Brilliant artifice and professional writing at its best – without a shadow of doubt.

When you buy this book – as you will, as millions will, and flock to see the film when it’s made – many will criticise it for being slick or facile. Such criticism is facile itself compared to writing a book as good as this. This is a story where characters come alive as real, separate people, and not two-dimensional stereotypes.

Where conflicting motivations are at play even between two protagonists we find sympathetic.

Where greed, desperation and fear have the tactile quality of dirt and blood. Your heart will hammer in your ribs with the tension. This is as unputdownable as unputdownable gets.

Earlier I used the adjective ‘populist’ advisedly. In Ivan Krastev’s recent article on Eurozine, populism is identified as the new ideology. In Daniele Albertazzi and Duncan McDonnell’s book Twenty-First Century Populism: The Spectre of Western European Democracy (also recommended) populism sets ‘virtuous and homogeneous people against a set of elite and dangerous “others” who are together depicted as depriving (or

BOOKSLISTINGS This week...

Saturday 6 Hammer & Tongue Performance Poetry Masterclass With slam winning performance poets Rosy Carrick and Jonny Fluffypunk.

Brighton Writers’ Centre,10am–4pm, £40/£30 Writing from Memory With Maggie Sawkins. The workshop will take participants through the process of generating stories from their own lives, getting to the truth of a story, writing and editing it.

See all our events listed online at www.thelatest.co.uk

attempting to deprive) the sovereign people of their rights, values, prosperity, identity and voice.’

In Skin and Bones, the two populist protagonists are at the mercy of ruthless elites and vested interest and fight tooth and nail (literally) for their ‘rights, values, prosperity, identity and voice’ etc. The story picks up on the zeitgeist with an edge of terror, in the way that The Full Monty did with humour. All the people involved are in some way troubled or in trouble. The violence is depicted with chilling economy. Bale’s use of telling detail is a masterclass in effective writing.

Bale complicates the story right until the very last moment with breathtaking spirals of plot. The story is told through many different points of view, yet it never feels forced. The whole hangs together with great integrity and narrative force.

The author, Brighton writer Tom Bale, appears to be a reincarnation of David Harrison, whose Sins of the Father was well received a few years ago. As Bale, he has written a spellbinding thriller and a searing revelation of contemporary southern society, fearful of ‘the other’, conservatively protective of neighbourhoods and localities from external, usually commercial, forces, looking over its shoulder longingly to some lost arcadia. It starts with a Hungerford-style massacre in a Sussex village. From the very first line (‘A glance to her left was all it took…’) you’re in the hands of a master storyteller, an assured craftsman.

Third Level Arts Centre, Portsmouth, 12pm–4pm, £25/£20

Coming up...

Saturday 13 December Writing for Competitions With Vanessa Gebbie. Day two of the popular workshop – other class date: Saturday 29 November.

Brighton Writer's Centre, 10am–1pm, £40/30.

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STAND-UP COMEDY

ART

A laughing matter Victoria Nangle comes up with a cracking joke and searches out some festive cheer in this season of goodwill Alright, so it’s December. It’s officially cold, it’s officially getting scarily close to Christmas and I’m allowed to worry now without appearing too much to be the festive worry-wort I am, and it’s officially the season of good cheer.

So where is it then?

With all the best ho, ho, hos in the world, bells jingling like they’re about to get disconnected they’re so jingly, and forced smiles at the ready, as we prepare to embark upon the annual odyssey to meet up with the relatives that time forgot, good cheer there ain’t. Anxious cheer a-plenty but good don’t get started until well after lunch on Christmas Day and that satisfied feeling of ‘we’re over the hump of it’ starts to emerge. That’s not to say that Christmas isn’t fun at all, it’s just bloody exhausting with it. So why not search out some Christmas cheer of our own?

Last year, my Christmas cheer manifested itself in the uncanny knack of turning any joke I tried to write into something fit for a cracker. ‘Which of the armed forces has the best bellys?’ ‘The naval forces.’ That was one of mine. Sorry. But it was quite nice to feel connected in some way to this whirling dirvish that was taking over not only my holiday days but also my TV schedule and my familial expectations.

“As we prepare for the annual odyssey to meet the relatives that time forgot, good cheer there ain’t” A lot of comics write material especially for the Christmas period. Either new stuff or the old faithfuls that they can churn out every year. It’s such a big event that affects us all – simply having an ambition to travel near the end of the month could stop you ignoring the steamroller of a holiday that it is. Many have been marooned in Leeds for an extra day thanks to the ‘hands down’ effect Christmas has on the trains. And so, it’s always good to have something in your material that at least acknowledges that as a comic you’re not living in a vacuum called ‘my set.’

In creating some new festive gags, it gives us the chance to write something new without it having to be an entire section. Just a nod and a wink will suffice, and as such means that I’ve got the freedom to change the gag every time I perform if I so wish. Try out something new.

Something I’ve thought of on my way to the venue. Since all I’ve got is a festive space in my set for this gag, it doesn’t need to lead into the next topic, it doesn’t have to connect to the previous one, leaving a lot of leeway for the development of something better than last year’s cracker efforts.

And so will find the more mainstream comics. If you find yourself in a comedy club, searching out the cheer, check out the new festive gags.

They might be just for you, just for tonight.

☺

Stand-up wisdom: “Any students in? I thought I could smell the Pot Noodle.” Pam Fforde

COMEDYLISTINGS

Thursday 4

Saturday 6

New Act Night This unique and popular show is the starting point for graduates of the highly acclaimed Jill Edwards’ StandUp Comedy Workshops at Komedia.

Talented new comics take to the stage.

Komedia, 7.30pm, £7/5.

Cheeky Devil Xmas Special Get into the ho, ho, ho mood with headline act Zoe Lyons, plus Joe Bor, Matt Rudge, Jane Bostock and compere Paul McCaffrey.

Sanctuary, 8:00pm, £10/8.

Sunday 7 Friday 5 Krater Comedy Club A fantastic line-up to kick-off the Christmas month, with 2008 if.comedy Best Newcomer winner Sarah Millican joining Prerrier winner Reg D Hunter and Gary Delaney. Compered by award-winner Stephen Grant. Komedia, 6.30pm, £12.50/10.

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➧ For full listings go to thelatest.co.uk/7

Bent Double This monthly gay-friendly night features the comic talents of Jo Caulfield headlining, supported by Jen Brister and Chris Neill, not to mention Best Joke of The Edinburgh Festival 2008 winner, compere Zoe Lyons. Komedia, 7.30pm, £10/8.

Serena Sussex – Autumn Walk, 36a Duke Street

Xmas is open Open for the first two weekends in December (Sat 6–Sun 7 and Sat 13–Sun 14), the Open Houses offer a unique selection of art and handmade goods, ideal for discovering perfect gifts for all your friends and family. Over seventy houses offering a cornucopia of unusual and beautiful art and gifts will be open to the public. As well as paintings and sculpture, most houses offer a wide range of ceramics, jewellery, textiles, lighting, furnishings, cards and Christmas decorations.

At many of the houses you can chat to the artists and makers about their work, and buy direct from the artist.

Most houses are open between 12 and 6pm but times may vary, so it is best to check individual brochure listings for details. www.aoh.org.uk

ART LISTINGS NORTH LAINE PHOTOGRAPHY GALLERY Snoopers Paradise, Kensington Gardens, Brighton 01273 628794 Brighton & Hove Calendar The annual calendar exhibition featuring work that depicts Brighton throughout the year, in all its colourful and vibrant glory. Calendar is also for sale at £5.

Mon–Sat 10.15am–5.45pm, Sun 11.15am–15.45pm, until end of Jan 09

BRIGHTON MUSEUM AND ART GALLERY Royal Pavilion Gardens, 01273 292882 Lives Less Photographed: Working Class Life in Brighton, 1860–1935 Exhibition that reveals some rare images of local working class life: the people and the lost areas of Brighton in which they lived.

Until 26 April 2009

DE LA WARR PAVILION Bexhill-on-Sea 01424 229111 The Sublime Image of Destruction Battlefield ‘aftermath’ images with bleak, lyrical and painterly images by Simon Norfolk, Paul Seawright and Broomberg and Chanarin.

Until 4 Jan, Mon–Sun 10am–6pm

CITY COLLEGE Pelham Street, Brighton 01273 667788 Julia Horbaschk: Labour of Love Photograph document of Eastern European immigrants in the UK, which tackles stereotypical representation.

Until 4 Dec

INK_D GALLERY 96 North Road, Brighton, 01273 645299 Chris Kettle: Delusions of Grandeur

Brighton artist who produces contemporary paintings with a classical touch, often coated with tears of varnish and colourful graphic sidelines.

5–24 December, Mon–Sat 10am–6pm

LIGHTHOUSE 28 Kensington Gardens, Brighton 0127 647197 Burrow Me: Laure Prouvost Presented inside an earth-lined burrow, Prouvost’s new film invites the viewer to take part in the story of the inhabitants of an underground lair.

Until 11 Jan, Wed–Sun 11am–5pm

BRIGHTON MEDIA CENTRE 15-17 Middle Street, Brighton Guerilla Art Market Street art, handmade goods, zine collectives and urban art from Brighton, London and beyond, this is a one-weekend-only opportunity to purchase some art-related Xmas goodies.

6 & 7 December, 11am-6pm

PHOENIX GALLERY 10–14 Waterloo Place, Brighton, 01273 603700 Entre-deux New work arising out of a photographic exchange project involving Phoenix Brighton and French partner Diaphane. Part of Brighton Photo Fringe Until 6 Dec, Tues–Sat 11am–5pm

CRANE KALMAN Kensington Gardens, Brighton 01273 697096 Tim Flach: Equus II Tim Flach’s collection of unusual and beautiful studies of horses.

Until 31 December, Mon–Sat 10am–6pm, Sun 10:30am–4:30pm

031_LS401 Music_News

11/25/08

3:05 PM

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latest music ★ artists ★ interviews ★ gigs ★ new releases ★ clubs ★ djs ★ chart ★

NEWS Listen To London Listen To London is a 1981 documentary rerelease about London’s vibrant post-punk music scene. Premiering at Komedia on Saturday 6 December, the film explore the aftermath of punk; new wave and ‘synth’. The film will be followed by a panel discussion and Q&A session, with the filmmakers Steve Sattler and Desmond Horsfield. Author and broadcaster Charlie Gillett will also be on a panel alongside record producer Mick Glossop and band members from The Papers and The Thompson Twins, both featured in the film.

The Papers will also be playing a special oneoff reunion gig at Coalition and there will be a DJ set from Charlie Gillett.

Listen To London, Saturday 6 December, Komedia, 1pm (The Papers at Coalition, 7pm)

Powerplant Led by genre thrashing British percussionist Joby Burgess, Powerplant end their tour of their multimedia piece Import/Export in Brighton. British minimalist Graham Fitkin’s technologically advanced, innovative work Chain Of Command uses the xylosynth with live electronics, motion tracking and live visuals to deliver its global political message while Gabriel Prokofiev’s Import/Export uses items of scrap (Nigerian Fanta bottles, oil drums etc) woven together with live electronics and film, to explore social themes and global resonances.

Powerplant presents Import/Export, Saturday 6 December, Brighton Dome Pavilion Theatre.

Powerplant

Going to Brighton Alabama 3 continue to ply their twisted acid-fried country grooves.

Jeff Hemmings caught up with Larry Love The band formed when Jake Black met Rob Spragg at an acid house party in Peckham and they decided that a fusion of country music with acid house was a musical possibility. And what an inspired idea it was! Every member of the group has an alias by which they are known, the band's founding members adopting the personas ‘Larry Love’(Rob Spragg) and ‘The Very Reverend Dr. D. Wayne Love’ (Jake Black).

If you’re still unsure, you’re not from Alabama and there are more than three of you, correct?

“Yes, that’s pretty goddamned correct,” drawls the inimitable Larry Love backstage at The Parlure Spiegeltent back in May. Apparently you guys can play genuine country and western music, right? “Behind the veneer of stupidity, i.e: a country western techno band fronted by a Welshmen and a Scotsman

pretending they’re from Alabama, I’m proud to say there does lie an integrity of musicianship and hence we’ve always tried to maintain and develop the possibility of stripping the songs down to the country and blues vibe or down to the acid house and dance vibe.”

How do you get that authentic warm vocal twang? Too much smoking? “Not at all, I am a bona fide son of a preacher man. When I was 17/18 I listened to Robert Johnson; I did sell my soul (not sure if it was the devil, it might have been Tom Jones’ Uncle, in the valleys of South Wales).”

You’re known to party very hard. Are things slowing down? “Yes, we’ve totally slowed down.

We tuck ourselves up in our little B&Bs after a gig… What do you think!?”

Alabama 3, Concorde 2, Tue 2 & Wed 3 December

UPCOMING GIGS

Australian Pink Floyd Ridiculously successful tribute act, but with a faintly humorous slant. And, of course, they are very good at it…

Tuesday 28 April, Brighton Centre

If you would like your event listed please email listings@thelatest.co.uk

James 9 December, Dome Mark Lanegan & Isobel Campbell 10 December, De La Warr, Bexhill-on-Sea Blind Boys of Alabama 12 December, Dome Status Quo 12 December, Brighton Centre Maddy Prior 15 December, Hove Centre Stereophonics 16 December, Brighton Centre The Fratellis 17 December, Dome The Damned 21 December, Komedia Sensational Alex Harvey Band 22 Dec, Concorde 2 Bad Manners 23 Dec, Concorde 2 Animal Collective 15 Jan, Concorde 2 Denny Laine 24 Jan, Old Market Teddy Thompson 22 Jan, Concorde 2 Eat Static 24 Jan, Concorde 2 Marillion 28 Jan, Concorde 2

The Streets 28 January, Dome Richard Thompson 31 January, Dome Sharleen Spiteri 5 February, Dome Keane 10 February, Brighton Centre Robyn Hitchcock 16 Feb, Komedia Candi Staton 25 Feb, Old Market Elbow 28 February, Dome Emiliana Torrini 14 March, St Georges Hugh Cornwell 25 March, Concorde 2 The Beat 27 March, Concorde 2 Simply Red 31 March, Brighton Centre The Enemy 8 April, Dome The Prodigy 14 April, Brighton Centre David Byrne 14 April, Dome Australian Pink Floyd 28 April, Brighton Centre Counting Crows 24 May, Brighton Centre

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032_LS401 music_reviews jeff

11/26/08

12:10 PM

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MUSIC REVIEWS A weekly review of local and national releases Brighton indie hopefuls Gloria Cycles release their second single ‘No Zeros’ in the lead up to the release of their debut album. An R’n’B indie sound, simple yet effective, will possibly drive the band to greater things in 2009.

Yes, The Pipettes are cute and wacky and rather good in their knowing retro-kitsch way (concocted by Brighton intellectuals, looking to translate the KLF’s The Manual into further success), but maybe now the joke is over? Last of the originals Rose Elinor Dougall thinks so, having left earlier in the year to pursue solo activities. ‘Another Version of Pop Song’, continues the irony-laden lofty pop idealism of The Pipettes via the KLF, but immerses itself in the warm glow of ‘60s psychedelia beat music. Yes, it’s endearing, but it’s just another song, isn’t it?

There hasn’t been much change to the Tracy Chapman sound over the years, beginning with her breakthrough hit ‘Fast Car’. Fast forward to 2008, and it’s surprising how little success she’s had despite those great beginnings. But there is a hard-core following, particularly among women of certain sexual and political persuasions, but Chapman has never pandered to those, continuing instead to venture down her lonely road of redemption, peace, hope and love.

Brightblack Morning Light have carved out a little niche for their extreme, experimental, hazy and stoned hippy sound à la 1969. Even their name evokes the period when the dream was quickly evaporating under the suffocating fog of the Nixon and incoming Heath administrations. Much better than their too copyist debut album, Motion To Rejoin has at its core the blues, with glorious harmonic singing, brass, flutes and a deeply magical feel throughout. Goes on a bit though. We could do with a change of, um, pace, man…

Amadou & Mariam’s extraordinary Welcome To Mali, isn’t so much an introduction to the music of Mali as an introduction of western influences into the music of Mali – dub, reggae, rock and pop are all in the mix topped off by Mariam’s haunting vocal. The sensational global vibes of the album make this one of the best of 2008.

Jesse Malin is playing Brighton this week, so it’s only fitting to give his new live album, Mercury Retrograde, a listen. Recorded over two nights in New York last December, this perfectly captures an intimate and largely acoustic set of versions of Malin’s very best tunes and some brilliant covers. Malin’s vocal eccentricities at first grate, as does his between-song banter, though given time, this works its way into the listener’s subconscious and refuses to leave.

Another quality live album next, and fey Scots Belle and Sebastian’s The BBC Sessions. Recorded between 1996 and 2001 for shows presented by John Peel, Steve Lamacq and Mark Radcliffe, this is the sound of a band at the peak of their creative powers.

If you were lucky enough to catch Nick Cave’s show a few weeks ago, you may have heard the rumbling rockers Tenebrous Liar supporting.

The sampler of their record Last Stand is a hypnotic, atmospheric dirge both reminiscent of the greats (namely Cave) and fantastically distinctive.

Finally, time for a quick mention to another album sampler: Brighton soul vocalist Alice Russell’s Pot of Gold. A swinging, upbeat, catchy affair, like last week’s BIMMers Mascara, what Russell may lack in originality, she makes up for in ability and a sound both of the moment and vintage.

Brighton Latest Download Chart Top 10

★ 1 Tubba 3 Ply – Gerhard ★ 2 No Sharp Objects – Home 3 Jaybee – Miles to Go 4 N-D-E – Incredible Machine 5 Amongst The Pigeons – Wings Wings Beat 6 Chaos Borne – Watching 7 Frunt, Bak & Nutz – The Rites Of Wolf 8 Jaybee – Sweet Savage 9 Mr Resonate – Say What You Mean 10 Mr Resonate – All That I’m Not It’s another week at the top for the moody dance DJ Tubba 3 Ply and his classy ‘Gerhard’ as the country rockers No Sharp Objects move up to two with ‘Home’.

Electro-funk eccentric Jaybee drops to three and eight as N-D-E’s D’n’B ambience proves a hit at four and further dark dance takes five with ‘Amongst The Pigeons‘.

11 Stupid Kid Lost 12 Chaos Borne The Moment 13 Stupid Kid With You 14 Portslade Girls and Boys 15 The Beautiful Word Golden Box 16 Mr Resonate The Opposite Vibe 17 Amongst The Pigeons Deep Housey 18 The Mojo Fins Always Now 19 Last Days of Lorca Big Green Parcel Machine 20 Monsters Build Mean Robots Chimes Break Through Light...

21 Caramel Jack Curtain 22 129 Die! In Jet Progression 23 Guerrilla Audio Another Life 24 sMs I’m Sorry Dave 25 Dear Jon. On Your Side

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26 R21 Proved You Wrong 27 Caramel Jack We Could Build Skyscrapers 28 Jonny Loves House Care About Your Love 29 The Woo!worths Konichiwa 30 Breakinbear Breeze 31 Guerrilla Audio Cry Wolf 32 Sweet Violentine Eva B 33 Glitters From Billy Holiday 34 Sparker 1000 Days (Now I Want You) 35 The Mystic Wizards The Vulture Song 36 North Laine Crys 37 Millsy Slug Music Power 38 The Winter Club Liar 39 Victoria Ferguson & Ben Ingall Every Time 40 Indigo Star The Pearl

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If you would like your event listed please email listings@thelatest.co.uk

033_LS401_music_listings

11/27/08

8:40 AM

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MUSIC

For complete listings go to thelatest.co.uk/7

MUSIC& CLUBLISTINGS 2 – 8 Dec Tuesday 2 Live Music Alabama 3 The first of a two night stint for Brixton's finest (only?) country-acid-house exporters. Concorde 2, 8pm, £16 Blueprint + Gentlemens Club Prince Albert, 8pm, £tbc Helen Glavin + Dirk Campbell Celtic, jazz, world music.Pelham Hse, Lewes 01273 401973, 7:30pm, £10/7 New Adventures Romantic, orchestral, mournful rock. Engine Rooms, 7:30pm, £6 Bars and clubs Audio Snide. Tight-trousered indie disco.

10pm–2am, £3/2 Brighton Coalition Latin Fever. Latin music to get your juices flowing. 10pm–2am, free.

Digital Glitterati. A classy night for student types. 11pm–3am, £5/3 Pavilion Tavern Guerrilla Rocks. Indie, rock, metal and emo mash-up. 10:30pm–2am, £1-£3 Po Na Na Sweet. Commercial R'n'B, Funky House and Baseline influenced tracks with Juice FM's Mike Panteli. 10pm–3am, £5/3 Tru Bandwagon. Student night with club anthems, old school R’n’B and classic house plus loan bending promos! 10pm–2:30am, £1£3 Water Margin Sessions. Run by students and playing for the students. 11pm–4am, free–£2

Wednesday 3 Live Music Alabama 3 Day two of the dance/country kings’ residency. Concorde 2, 8pm, £16 Everything Everything Manc math-pop-rockers with a slice of funk to boot. Brighton Coalition, 8pm, £tbc.

Fujiya and Miyagi + Hereldeduke + Grasscut Electro, funk and rock night featuring decent locals. Pavilion Theatre, 7:30pm, £9 The Legendary Bee's Mouth Open Mic Bee's Mouth, 9pm, free.

Music Monthly New music showcase.

Bands TBC. The Hope, 8pm, free.

Open Mac Night Open mic for electronic music. Sidewinder, 9pm, free.

Randy Crawford and Joe Sample Jazz favourites collaborate for this special tour.

Brighton Dome, 8pm, £tbc.

We Got Soul: The LMB All Stars + Katie Leone Soul and jazz vocalist who has worked with big names including Lou Reed, Jimmy Page and ABC. Latest Music Bar, 8pm, £6 Bars and clubs Arc Life is Easy. A Mid-week interlude of indie classic new and old, plus floorfillers a plenty.

10pm, free–£1 Audio Supercharged. A leading light in the rising global dubstep movement, Benga brings his sound to the south. 11pm–2:30am, £6/5 Brighton Coalition Club NME. A beerfest for All Stars wearing rock/indie fans with live NME bands and Brighton DJs. 10:30pm–3:30am, free.

Funky Buddha Lounge We Luv ‘90s. Classic 90s anthems from Spice Girls to Soul II Soul.

A dash of mid-week nostalgia with cheap as you like drinks! 90p. Contact venue for details.

Honey Club Contagious. Southern FM's Paul Hilyer plays house & dance. 10:30pm–3am, £3/1 Water Margin Forgive Me Father for I Have Synth’d. Old school revival of ‘80s electro, breakdance, pop and rock. 11pm–3am, £tbc.

Genetics Playing a mixture of intelligent, liquid, neuro and darkside D’n’B. 3am- 6am, free–£2

Thursday 4 Live Music Biff! Bang! Pow! presents: Long Tall Shorty + The Dirty Socials Mod punk theme night.

Latest Music Bar, 8pm, £6/5 John Smith + Flake Brown Folk performer from Devon Prince Albert, 8pm, £8/7 Jolie Holland + Sam Amidon Acclaimed American roots music. Hanbury Club, 8pm, £12.50–£14.50 Kensingtons + Morning Orchestra DJs after bands. Cella (at Sanctuary Café), 9pm, £3

Will Young

Live Music Cafe The best singer songwriters in town. Latest Music Bar, 8:30pm, £2 Open Mic The Hub, Lewes Road, 8:30pm, free.

Samuel Arts Quartet Gypsy jazz. Bee's Mouth, 9pm, free.

Sound Factory Stripped: Wide Eyed Order + Dan Sumner Acoustic showcase. The Providence, 8pm, £1 Will Young Perhaps the only half-decent performer to emerge from TV's Pop Idol.

Brighton Dome, 8pm, £tbc.

Bars and clubs Audio Shameless. Trashy pop anthems and indie classics. 11pm, £2 Brighton Coalition Stick It On. Select your best knock-out trax in a DJ face-off. Could you be a future deck hero? 10:30pm–2am, free.

Digital Thursday Club Presents...Vagabondz.

Taskforce and Hatcha head up the weekend drive. 10pm, £7 The Hope Brap FM. Thursdays are the new Fridays with everything from Downtempo to Techno! 8pm–2am, free.

Ocean Rooms Therapy. Official UBSU Socfed night with stick it on and unadulterated pop.

10:30pm–3am, £3 Po Na Na Secret Discotheque. Return to the 80s. 10pm–3am, £3/2

Friday 5 Live Music Andy Panayi + Mark Nightingale Quartet Brighton Jazz Club event. Komedia, 8pm, £8-12 The Barrelhouse: Rockin 'n' Rhythm 40s swing and jive night. Hanbury Club, 7pm, £9/7 The Diablos Half Brick (Worthing), 7:30pm, £tbc.

Carnival Collective + Los Albertos Latin flavoured collective fusing dub, funk, d’n’b and more. Brighton Coalition, 11pm, £10 Pope Joan + Clowns Local indie rockers who have recently released their debut album.

Engine Rooms, 7:30pm, £4 Rocking Blues Night: Miller Anderson Ex Mott The Hoople, Spencer Davis Group and T Rex man. The Neptune, 8:30pm, free.

Roy and Tony’s Club Live comedy and music night. Latest Music Bar, 7pm, £10, £20 (inc a 2 course dinner).

Sound Factory: Jumping Spiders + The Sixth Row + Catimal Rock night. The Providence, 8pm, £1 Steel City Tour: The Human League + ABC + Heaven 17 New romantics from Sheffield's eighties era hit Brighton. Brighton Centre, 6:30pm, £29.50 Sweet Hove Chicago Upbeat, foot-tapping blues. Latest Music Bar, 9pm, £9 We Got Soul with Kingsize Five Rocking blues and jazzy, dirty swing. Latest Music Bar, 8pm, £6 Welfare Mothers + Hour Hands Prince Albert, 8pm, £tbc.

Bars and clubs 2 One One Lollipop. R'n'B and Hip Hop. 11pm–3am, free before 11.30pm Arc Some Kind of Wonderful. Sixties Night.

11pm–3am, £3 Brighton Coalition Playgroup. 5 hours of music, dancing, comedy, drinking and fullthrottle fiesta with The Cuban Brothers, Django Spears and AK/DK. 10:30pm–4am, £12/10 Concorde 2 Etch with Mr Scruff. Tea enthusiast Mr Scruff returns to the tables plus raw percussive energy in the form of TM Juke & The Jack Baker Trio. 10pm–3:30am, £12 Digital Stonelove. 101% maximum indie rock'n'roll with DJ and bands. 11pm–3am, £4 Engine Rooms Deviant. Hard moshin' rock alternative for eyeliner'd up boys and girls in PVC. 11pm–3am, £5/3 Funky Buddha Lounge Thank Funk It’s Friday.

Start the weekend with Sean Quinn’s party tunes. Feel the magic. 10pm–3am, free–£8 Funky Fish The Funkyfish Club. Soul, funk, old skool, ‘60s and ‘70s tunes. 10pm–3am, £5/3.50 Honey Club HardSouth. Diamond blasting Hard Dance with Ed Real. 11pm–5am, £5–£10

➧ Please check with venue before travelling. See our venue directory for details

and house with guests. 10:30pm–5am, £12/5 New Hero It Is Still 1985. An alternative 80s night full of outrageous tunes! 10pm, £3 Ocean Rooms Ocean Rooms Winter Masquerade Ball. Superstar DJs. 11pm, £tba.

Om Bar and Club Balearic Jukebox - 1st Birthday. Winter sun, eclectic music and the odd cocktail kiss with The Balearic Brothers and Jon Marsh. 9pm–3am, free.

Oxygen Red Hot Spot. DJ DrkHrse playing Upfront and Classic floorfillers. 9pm–2am, free.

Pavilion Tavern Drop Zone. Dark, Heavy, Glam, Alternative Dance and beer to dribble down you 'til you drop! 10:30pm–3am, £2–£4 Volks Psychedelicious. Psytrance upstairs to breaks, funk and chill in the low level of the funky monkey room. 11pm–5am, £7/5 Water Margin Logo. Urban Junkie. Dirty filthy electro breaks from Gorgeous. 10pm–3am, £5

Sunday 7 New Hero Somewhere in the Universe…

Leading alt electro dance party. 10pm, £5/3 Ocean Rooms 12FU. Alternative electro dance floor party. 11pm–4am, £5/3 Oxygen Red Freaky Disko. DJ Pablo playing Disco, House and Party tunes. 9pm–2am, free.

Pavilion Tavern Kick Out The Jams. Rock'n'Roll mayhem sploshed together with beer, indie anthems and punk. 10:30pm–3am, £5/3 Po Na Na Ice Box. Funky house night for a dressed up crowd. 10pm–3am, £5/4 Sidewinder Go Bang! With Ali Broadcast.

Installing a rich soundtrack of Underground Disco, Electro Funk and more. 8pm–2am, free.

Tru Skint. A choice of 3! Playing mainstream funky house, R’n’B and Cheesey disco hits.

10pm–2:30am, free–£3 Volks Krumble. Mutant Jungle, D’n’B, Breakcore, Hardteck, Gabba. 10pm–4am, £6–£8 Water Margin Twisted Disco Love. TDL productions gives you back the love to funk.

11pm, £tbc. B-Side. Tech and filthy electro with Tiger Lily and Paul My Fingah. 2am, £5

Saturday 6 Live Music David Celia Band Alt. country from Toronto.

Pelham Arms, Lewes, 8:30pm, free.

Dreadzone Dub and dance veterans now in their sixteenth year. Komedia, 8:30pm, £12.50 GBH + Peter and the Test Tube Babies + Constant State of Terror + From Plan to Progress Punk veterans.Engine Rooms,7pm, £9 Green Man Festival on Tour: Pete Greenwood and Mary Hampton Folk festival goes on tour. Unitarian Church, 8pm, £tbc.

Jools Holland and his Rhythm and Blues Orchestra TV muso and former Squeeze man plays his annual festive show. Brighton Centre, 7pm, £31.50 Liane Carroll Award-winning jazz vocalist.

De La Warr Pavilion, 8pm, £12 Neville Staple The former Specials’ man is nothing short of a two-tone icon. Concorde 2, 7:30pm, £tbc.

Salter Cane + The Misbegotten + The Sea Will Decide Country. Prince Albert, 8pm, £tbc.

Sound Factory: Utopia Jaded + Three Pistols + Maa Tonic Indie rock night. The Providence, 8pm, £1 Sweetnighter Pyschedelic ‘70s jazz rock.

Hanbury Club, 7pm, £10/7 The Zutons Liverpool's finest indie-pop eccentrics. Brighton Dome, 8pm, £tbc.

Bars and clubs Arc Hold Up. Unpretentious indie night.

10:30pm–4am, £5 Brighton Coalition Junkbox. Brighton’s longest running Electro Tech night. 11pm–4am, £12/10 Concorde 2 Jah Shaka Sound System. King of Dub, Jah Shaka Sound, celebrates the month of December Tribe of Asher. 10pm–4am, £10 Digital The Pussycat Club Winter Wonderland.

A cutting edge soundtrack of Funky Electro and Dirty House from The Audio Pimps, Nippa and Alex Outram. Hedonistic night with snow angels and ice maidens aplenty. 11pm–4am, £12/10 Funky Buddha Lounge Buddha Soul. Disco, funk, house and rare groove from Juice Fm's Mike Panteli. 10pm–3am, £10 Funky Fish The Funkyfish Club. Soul, funk, old skool, ‘60s and ‘70s tunes. 10pm–3am, £5/3.50 Honey Club Sevensins. Big room electro, trance

Live Music An Evening of Brecht and Weill Jazz and tango cabaret rhythms Komedia, 8pm, £8/7 Brighton Philharmonic Orchestra Vaughan Williams, Finzi, Purcell and Britten. Brighton Dome, 2:45pm, £tbc.

Herbie's Jazz Breakfast Pastries, teas, coffees and licensed bar with jazz veteran Herbie Flowers. Ropetackle Centre, 11am, £7/2 Joan As Police Woman The ‘rich yet gritty’ singer-songwriter Joan Wasser, who has worked with Rufus Wainwright and Antony and the Johnsons. Concorde 2, 7:30pm, £12.50 Passion Dance Jazz and world music.

The Neptune, 8:30pm, free.

Roast 'n' Jazz: Terry Seabrook UK Latin jazz and some Sunday roast! Nice. Latest Music Bar, 12:30pm, £10 inc full roast dinner.

Roast and Swing Jazz Duo Bebop, blues and swing jazz guitar. The Bristol Bar, 2pm, free.

Sanctuary Sunday Open mic night. Cella (at Sanctuary Café), 7pm, free.

Scenic Routes Lively European sounds bounce off dark lyrics. Sidewinder, 8pm, free.

Shauna Parker and The Saloon Bar Band Cleveland Pub, 8pm, £tbc.

Soul Sisters Showcase Singing course divas perform at their end of year party. Prince Albert, 7:30pm, £3 Three Bonzos and a Piano Three original members of the madly shambolic Bonzo Dog Doo-Dah Band. Latest Music Bar, 6:30pm, £12.50 (£20 inc dinner) Bars and clubs Arc Irie. Ragga, R'n'B, Hip Hop and UK Garage.

Sundays are the new Fridays! 10pm–3am, £5/3 Honey Club Sundelicious. Knockin' siesta Sundays into the past, Lee Garrett and Salerno play house and soulful beats. 10pm–3am, £2/1 The Open House We Change The Frequency.

All things diverse from Radiohead, Madlib, National Forest and Playgroup. 8pm, free.

Monday 8 Live Music The Bee’s Mouth Jazz Forum House band welcomes performers.Bee’s Mouth, 8:30pm, free.

Bleeding Hearts Club Prince Albert, 8pm, £tbc Caroline Nin A tribute to Marlene Dietrich.

Komedia, 8:30pm, £15/12 Jesse Malin + David Bialenko (Marah) + Damien Drake Great acoustic singersongwriter who’s previously worked with the likes of Bruce Springsteen and Ryan Adams.

Engine Rooms, 7:30pm, £10 Martin Simpson Folk. The Greys, 8:30pm, £tbc.

Tina Dico Popular Danish singer-songwriter.

Hanbury Club, 7pm, £10 Bars and clubs Brighton Coalition Trash Mondays. Filthy student fun. 10:30pm–3am, free.

Funky Buddha Lounge Urban Lounge. DJs Outbreak, Rudeben and Dubl break out the best in Old skool garage, R’n’B, Hip Hop, Bashment and swing. 10:30pm–3am, £3/2 Honey Club Disco Babe. Disco and indie with drinks £1.50 all night. 10:30pm–2:30am, £3/1 Volks Strictly Reggae. Dancehall, bashment, roots and revival. 10pm, £4.50/3.50 Music by Nick Aldwinckle Clubs and Bars by Jaime Pettit

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GAYLISTINGS 2 – 8 December Tuesday 2

Joan As Policewoman Primal Scream Over 20 years rocking and the ‘Scream still kick serious ass, whilst getting the their ‘Rocks Out’ and generally being ‘Loaded’.

Oh, yes, Bobby Gillespie and his bad boys are back in town, and we all must ‘Come Together’.

Tuesday 2 December New Adventures Good looking new outfit with imaginative and grandiose songs. Ones to watch. Educated Animals support.

Tuesday 2 December, Engine Room Fujiya & Miyagi Popular krautrock inspired outfit from Brighton, mixing up can with electronica and funk, and hitting the jackpot on such songs as ‘Ankle Injuries’ and Knickerbocker’. Touring around the world these days, this will be a special hometown gig.

Wednesday 3 December, Pavilion Theatre Jolie Holland Gorgeous country acoustic flavours form this regular performer here in Brighton. There’s almost a Byrdesque quality to to some of her songs, that dwell, as this music often does, on the long hard road. But who can complain when it’s done as beautifully as this?

Thursday 4 December, Hanbury Carnival Collective + Los Albertos Known as the ‘turquoise tribe’, this group of somewhere between 25 and 30 performers mix dub with funk, swing and general party vibes.

A strong latin flavour marks these out from other pseudo-ethnic acts.

Friday 5 December, Coalition The Kingsize Five Boogie-woogie swing from this contemporary band who write their own stuff. Noirish at times, quite feisty at others, the driving jazzy

infected rhythms mash expertly with the witty and gritty observations of band leader Michael Brown. Great to hear a band do their own thing, and not reheat all those standards.

Friday 5 December, Latest Music Bar The Zutons Getting better by the album, this immensely popular Liverpool band are really just an excellent back to basics rhythm’n’blues garage proposition with the leggy sax player adding extra eye-watering candy.

Saturday 6 December, Dome Joan As Policewoman Former lover of Jeff Buckley, and coruscating violinist with the likes of Cave, John, Scissor Sisters and Wainwright, Joan Wasser is a gorgeous and oddly haunting singer of textured acoustic songs.

Sunday 7 December, Concorde 2 Pete Greenwood & Mary Hampton Double header as part of the Green Man Festival on Tour. While Greenwood harks back to Nick Drake mixed with the floaty west coast vibes of the Laurel Canyon set and a splash of Simon & Garfunkel, Brighton’s Mary Hampton makes haunting, poetic music, sometimes traditional arrangements of ancient songs, some newer concoctions.

Saturday 6 December, Unitarian Church Jesse Malin This New York singer songwriter hasn't had quite as much crossover success as his old writing partner Ryan Adams but continues to plough away at the touring circuit regardless. This is quality, accessible acoustic rock that actually compares favourably with Malin's heroes Springsteen and Neil Young.

Monday 8 December, Engine Rooms

Amsterdam Skint or Mint. An evening of Bingo and a brand new interactive game “Skint or Mint“ with cash prizes for grabs! 8pm, free.

Brighton Tavern Brighton Gay Men's Chorus.

Bar Open 12pm, free.

Ghetto Twisted Karaoke. Nothin' from your dad’s collection! Hosted by Mistress Cat. 9:30pm.

Legends Relax – It’s Tuesday. Friendly bar with smoking/sun terrace. Bar open 11am–5am, free.

Marlborough Free Poker Night. Learn and compete. 9pm, free.

Queen’s Arms Skint. Unlimited drinks wristbands for £10 plus guest DJ and karaoke. A credit crunch gem. 8pm–11pm, free.

R-Bar Shoot Me Baby! Get a FREE shot of Corky’s or Sourz with every alcoholic bevvy!

12pm–2am, free.

Revenge Payday Red Crimbo. An LGBT 'knickers in a twist' fundraiser event for THT. 10:30pm–3am, £3/2.

The Aquarium Theatre Bar Josh Mill's Music Night. With Uncle Ben’s quiz from 9pm, free.

The Basement Scene Queen. New night for scene staff and students with DJ lil' Alex.

11pm–4am, free.

Wednesday 3 Ghetto Miss-Shapes. Indie and pop. 9pm, free.

Legends Super Karaoke. New Karaoke & quiz night from 9pm. 11am–5am, free.

Marlborough YouTube Night. 8pm, free.

Prince Regent Swimming Pool Out To Swim South. 8:30pm, £4 per session, £20 annual pass.

R-Bar Cocktail Club. Enjoy the champagne lifestyle on lemonade money! 12pm–2am, free.

Revenge Pop! SEXY. Expect live on stage entertainment and chart pop and R’n’B. 10:30pm–3am, £3/2 NUS. Star Inn Charity Jukebox. 12pm–11pm.

The Basement Play. with DJ Alex Baker spinning all things house. 11pm–4am, free.

Thursday 4 Charles Street Bar Mad Cow. Cheap as Primark Pants. 8pm–11pm, £1 (goes to charity).

Charles Street Club Religion. Two floors of funky house. 10pm, £4/3.

Ghetto Booty Call Monthly. Rockin’ R'n'B nite.

10pm, free b4 11.

Komedia Brighton’s Best. Presenting Brighton's finest musical, comedy and literary talents, alongside fellow Brightonians on film, ranting and raving! 8pm, £12.50.

Marlborough Open Mic Night. 8pm, free.

Queen’s Arms Skint. See Tuesday.

R-Bar I Can’t Wait for the Weekend to Begin!

Funked up, soulful and uplifting house from 9.30pm. Bar open 12pm–2am, free.

Revenge GirlsOnTop. Fabulously trashy weekly lesbian night with ‘deck heroine’ LadyBex and DJ Smiffy. 10:30pm–4am, free b4 11:30 with passes, £4/5 after.

The Basement Box. DJ Jonesy plays chart hit remixes, funky house and dance, 11pm–4am.

Friday 5 Charles Street Bar Fairylea. Classic cheese, trash & oldies. Bar open 11am–midnight, free.

Charles Street Club Curiosity Lite. Pure unadulterated trashy disco pop. 10:30pm–3am, £5/4/3 NUS. Ghetto Popstarz. Playin' indie recent and retro! 10pm, free b4 11.

Legends Pre-Celebration. Pop Sounds. 7pm.

Marlborough Girls Night. 2 floors, lots ‘o’ ladies and guest DJs! 9pm–2am.

Queen’s Arms Pink. Definitive handbag, commercial and camp tunes. 9pm–2am, free.

R-Bar The GirlsOnTop Bar. DJ Smiffy hauls her

34 latest 7

best in trash, pop and party tunes from Girls on Top to R-Bar. 12pm–7am, free.

Revenge X-Factor Finalists. Get in on that XFactor frenzy, with the chance to see the act voted out on Saturday, the following Friday at Revenge. 10:30pm–5am, £5.

Star Inn Return of the Friday Bears Inc. Funky house and pop remixes. 8pm–1am, free.

The Basement Celebration with Dolly Rocket.

Alex Baker plays girly pop & handbag tracks all night long. 11pm–4am, free all night!

Saturday 6 Amsterdam Sun Downers. Enjoy the best beach house music in Brighton. 8pm–2am, free.

Charles Street Club Pussy Party. 11pm–3am, £TBC. Ghetto Wigout. A kitschy, cool night for the seriously unserious. 10pm, £tbc.

Legends Pre-Ignition. 7pm, free.

Marlborough Party. Guest DJs & live music.

9pm–2am, free.

Queen’s Arms Karaoke Party with Kamp Kevin.

Vocalists, comedians and drag (3:30–5:30pm).

Then party with Kamp Kevin til 12:30am! free.

R-Bar Kinky Baby. Kinky Dangerous prep with Dulcie Danger. 9pm–7am, free.

Revenge Kinky Dangerous. 4 top DJs, 2 floors, and 6.5 hours of fun. 10:30pm–4am, £7/3.

Star Inn Bear Essentials. DJ Charlie. Bar Open 12pm–1am, free.

The Aquarium Theatre Bar Cabaret. 9pm.

The Basement Ignition. With the funky house and chart remix sounds of DJ Peter Castle.

11pm–4am, free all night!

The PV at The Jury's Out Saturday Madness.

The best in Brighton duets from 4:30pm, then PV’s house DJs take over! Bar open 12pm, free.

Sunday 7 Amsterdam Sunday Lunch. Traditional roasts (12–5:30pm) with a cabaret twist. Hosted by Connie Conway from 8pm, free.

Ghetto Club Tropicana. Back to the 80s. 10pm.

Komedia Bent Double. Zoe Lyons comperes an evening of camp comedy and frolics. Featuring Barbara Nice, Jen Brister and Chris Neill 7:30pm, £10/8.

Legends Sunday Cabaret and Chill Out. 3:15pm.

Marlborough Yummy Roasts. Delicious roasts 'til they're gone! 12pm, free.

Queen's Arms Cabaret & Karaoke. Top cabaret at 5.30pm followed by the fabulous Betty Swollocks Karaoke Show. 12pm–3am.

The Basement Embrace. Charty tracks provided

by DJ Nick Shepherdson. 11pm–4am, free.

Tru Wild Fruit – Red Party Masked Ball 08.

Support your local community and join Jon Byrne and Neil Duffie, for a fruity red hot party! 10pm3am, £A charitable donation (£5 Min).

Monday 8 Amsterdam The Monday Bar open 11am, free.

Charles Street Club Studio 150. DJs Luke and Ali spin the best party retro tracks. Drinks promos. 10pm–2am, £1.50.

Ghetto Shibby Shabblers. DJs Pookie & Crackwhore. £1.50 pints & vodka mix.

9pm–2am, £3/2.

Latest Music Bar Apocalipstick – A musical journey to the end of the world. Spice is back with a storming new show. Journeying through issues such as Global warming and the credit crunch, expect to laugh, cry, sing and even learn!

8pm, £7/5 conc.

Legends Dave Lynn and Friends. A hysterical night of cabaret, 9:30pm. Bar open 11pm–5am.

Marlborough Trans Night. 9pm, free.

The Basement Back to the ‘80s and ‘90s. Get nostalgic with Steve Lush’s classic floorfillers.

11pm–4am, free.

If you would like your event listed please email listings@thelatest.co.uk

035_LS401 gaynews/will

11/27/08

4:13 PM

Page 1

LATESTGAY

See more at thelatest.co.uk

Brighton’s only weekly gay guide NEWS

Happy harmony Rachel Pegg talks to John Hamilton, chairman of Brighton and Hove (actually) Gay Men’s Chorus, ahead of their Christmas show Why did you set up the chorus three years ago?

I felt there was a need for a fun, safe environment. Of the three gay choruses that are in Brighton, they are all unique. When I was younger I sang in a choir and played a bit of piano and clarinet. I hadn't sung for many years. It was the best decision I've made to start the chorus.

How do you describe the Actually Chorus?

Hardworking, fun and very sociable. We have 40 members, from early 20s to 70. Our repertoire is very far-ranging. We will sing anything from Wagner to Queen’s Bohemian Rhapsody. We are trying to focus more on contemporary and popular classical stuff.

How does Brighton sustain three gay choruses?

There is a large gay population in Brighton and Hove. Our audiences are not just gay audiences, we appeal to the greater public as well. Men, women and children come to see our shows.

Do gay choruses promote a positive message?

You do still have homophobic attacks. This is why it is called a gay chorus, where gay men can go into a safe environment where they’re not going to get abuse. I think it is a little bit different for everyone. I wouldn't go as far as saying we have to fly a flag because we are gay and we are here. I think people need to be reminded that there are issues that affect a lot of people if not in this, then in other countries.

Have you ever been the victim of a homophobic attack?

Where I work in St James’s Street, there is a lot of abuse. I have been attacked while I was working as a doorman. I protected myself. I didn't hit anyone, but I have had training. For the average person walking down the street, for someone to fling you off your feet, it is terrifying.

How do you fund the chorus?

At the moment it is a members society. The board is taking steps to form a community-interest company, which allows us to apply for more funding. We make some money from performances and subs and we always give money to charity.

What do members get out of joining the chorus?

One thing is the educational aspect. Some have musical expertise. The majority don’t. We teach them to sing to quite a high level. We are going to start teaching musical theory so they can take theory exams. We are still looking for members, preferably lower voices. There is a level of commitment expected because you can’t put on a show without it.

The chorus rehearses every Thursday at St Andrew’s Church, Waterloo Street, Hove.

Christmas concert, 23 December, St Andrew's.

Concert with the Pink Singers, 13 December, Royal Academy of Music. www.bhagmc.org or info@bhagmc.org

William Tells Will Harris looks at how easy it is to keep up to date with your sexual health If you’re anything like me, you’ll hate being the last to know something. Yet figures released by the Health Protection Agency for World AIDS Day estimate there are currently as many as 10,000 gay men in the UK who have HIV without realising. Put another way, for every four gay men living with the condition today, one of them will be unaware of their status.

This became evident when, having reached the trouser-dropping part of the proceedings, I realised my nerves had made everything shrink to approximately one-eighth their normal size. “I’m sorry, nurse,” joked a voice in my head, “my genitals appear to have disappeared. I’ll be on my way.”

In the event, I was pleasantly surprised by how painless the

“I was terrified. The hardest mental obstacle to overcome, as with most things in life, was fear of the unknown. Would it hurt?“ It doesn’t surprise me. The first time I went for a sexual health check-up, I almost bottled it at the last minute, and if it hadn’t been for a former flatmate diplomatically terrifying me into thinking I was at death’s door I’d probably still be unaware of my status now. I’ve never known if she sensed I had cold feet or if she was just paying me back for leaving the toilet seat up, but her constant commentary on how awful I looked as we drove to the Claude Nicol clinic gave me the final impetus I needed.

No doubt I did look awful; I was terrified. The hardest mental obstacle to overcome, as with most things in life, was fear of the unknown. Would it hurt? Would I bump into someone I knew?

Would I get a hot doctor and be unable to conceal my ‘excitement’?

As far as the last question was concerned, I needn’t have worried.

By the time I’d bumbled my way through the reception process and sat tensely watching This Morning for 15 minutes: “Today’s phone in,” smiled Fern, “is vasectomy”), I don’t think I could have raised an eyebrow, let alone anything else.

process was. I’d always been told they used a barbed metal umbrella to take samples (which proves a) people are cruel, and b) I am gullible). So when the doctor produced a tiny plastic swab, I felt like all my Christmases had come at once. Looking back, the only unpleasant part of the experience was the dreadful wig balanced on my doctor’s bonce, which my perennially overactive imagination played and replayed falling into my exposed lap as he went about his work (FYI, giggling in a sexual health setting makes you look like a pervert).

Nowadays the process is even easier; tests for HIV can be done with a pin-prick of blood and the results delivered within an hour, and in many clinics other common STIs can be detected from just a urine sample. The sexual health services have made a real effort to ensure we don’t have to be the last to know our status. I think we should too.

To talk to someone about your own risk, call THT direct on 0845 1221200. Details of testing clinics can also be found at www.tht.org.uk.

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DOWN: 1 Chicken 2 Noise 3 Emission 4 Atom 5 Idiotic 6 Ninth 8 Lake 12 Specific 14 Rambler 16 Elector 17 Food 18 Tramp 20 Excel 21 Byre.

Solution to Quick 172 ACROSS: 1 Blotting-paper 7 Leasing 9 Sorts 10 Erection 11 Pins 13 Eaglet 15 Stated 18 Pond 19 Progress 22 Troop 23 Granite 24 Rearrangement.

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036_LS401_TVIntro

11/27/08

5:04 PM

Page 2

latestTV

Dani on TV

She says it how she sees it

Films on TV Michael Keaton, Batman, Friday 5, 9pm, E4

I’m A Celebrity…

Get Me Out of Here!

ITV1, 9pm I have to admit to missing most of the episodes that have appeared on TV. But I have been watching on the ITV catch-up service online.

The main problem with this programme in general is there is absolutely no way you can eat anything at all while watching it. I am watching now in-between writing and I already feel sick. The problem is I cant tell if it is the impending feast of grubs or Kilroy making me queasy.

Everyone is bored and, get this (the most amusing thing ever), acting almost shocked by what they have to do and where they have to live. Seriously guys, did you not realise that before? Where have you been for the past few years to not realise you may have to eat something gross and the fact that you think you are the most attractive person on the planet does not mean you can get out of it.

Did you see the bit where Carly was ‘moisturising’? Have you ever seen anything that ridiculous? And Kilroy certainly enjoyed it. So wrong! Put your boobs away and Kilroy keep your eyes closed!

The guy from Blue had a better go at pretending he hadn’t noticed Carly standing there flashing.

I did feel tremendously sorry for Esther. How hard it must be to have a broken heart and listen to others talk about how theirs are so full. I never really felt anything regarding Esther. She was neither here nor there for me but now I like her. A fair amount.

Nicola celebrates the birthday of her boobs – I think she is the one who is trying the ‘Myleene shower in a bikini the size of a five pence piece.’ I have watched enough episodes online. I feel suitably ill and still can’t stop wondering why people watch this, or even worse, agree to go on the show.

I have learnt three things watching this.

One: There is no way whatsoever I would ever eat anything moving. Two: If you move your shoulders in a certain way when only wearing a bra other people can see down it. And, thirdly, my original thoughts about Kilroy were correct – he is a twat!

So other than the three things above I cannot think of anything else I would gain from watching another squirming second of this show.

At least we know it’s nearly Christmas as this only appears then and I suppose that’s a good thing by association!

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TUESDAY 2 A Simple Plan ★★★✩✩ (1999, BBC1, 11.25pm. Dir Sam Raimi) It seemed simple enough. Two brothers and a friend find a plane that’s crashed with a cockpit full of cash. No one’s looking for the dosh so they decide to hide it and wait. Except patience is never going to be one of those popular virtues with these guys.

A film that earned Billy Bob Thornton an Oscar nomination.

WEDNESDAY 3 Please Sir ★★★✩✩ (1971, Channel 4, 1.30pm. Dir Mark Stuart) The trials and tribulations of late ‘60s school life, taken from the popular TV comedy series of the same name.

Starring John Alderton as the hapless ‘Sir’, surrounded by the familiar antics of class 5C and his fellow teachers.

A classic tale of a ‘cool’ teacher being a hit with his kids. Man.

THURSDAY 4 Inspector Gadget ★★✩✩✩ (1999, ITV2, 8pm. (Dir David Kellogg) Aka: When good cartoons go mediocre! Starring Matthew Broderick as the accident-prone gizmo-laden detective and Rupert Everett as his nemesis Sanford Scolex, the pair get into your average good natured twit versus evil overlyinflated opinion of his own intellect.

FRIDAY 5 Batman ★★★★✩ (1989, E4, 9pm. (Dir Tim Burton) Responsible for the phrase: “Where does he get those wonderful toys?” uttered from the lips of Jack Nicholson’s grotesque Joker, this holds typical Burton Gothic influences. Starring Michael Keaton as the batty loner and Kim Basinger as love interest Vicki Vale.

2 – 8 Dec

Movies on the box this week Lock, Stock And Two Smoking Barrels ★★★★✩ (1998, Sky Movies Indie, 12am.

Dir Guy Ritchie) Mr Madonna’s breakthrough heist movie, with a little help from the ‘geezers’ of London town. Responsible for the launch of Vinnie Jones’ acting career, this is a film of hard men and tall tales as a high stakes card game for Nick Moran, Dexter Fletcher, Jason Statham and Jason Flemyng takes an unexpected turn for the worse. Great fun.

SATURDAY 6 The First Wives Club ★★✩✩✩ (1996, Channel 4, 7.10pm. Dir Hugh Wilson) Just about average comedy about revenge plotted by three fortysomething divorcees – Bette Midler, Goldie Hawn and Diane Keaton – taken to the nth degree. Quite how they managed to get such talented actresses to play such two-dimensional characters is more indicative of the ageism the film claims to protest about.

The Boys From Brazil ★★★★★ (1978, Discovery, 9pm.

Dir Franklin J. Schaffner) Excellent conspiracy drama starring Lawrence Olivier, Gregory Peck and James Mason with a Nazi genetics plot. Steadily paced, this tale of ‘what if’ mixing fact with fiction keeps the tension up and leaves more than one ethical question unanswered.

SUNDAY 7 Silent Cry ★★★✩✩ (2002, Channel 5, 11.05pm.

Dir Julian Richards) Well thought out thriller in which a single mother searches for her stolen baby. The woman refuses to believe doctors when they tell her that that her newborn son died during the night and becomes convinced that he was stolen while she slept. She enlists the help of a sympathetic hospital porter in the search for the child through London’s underworld.

MONDAY 8 Wicker Park ★★★✩✩ (2004, Channel 4, 11.50pm.

Dir Paul McGuigan) Starring Josh Hartnett. Romantic thriller which sees a Chicago advertising executive putting his career and his impending marriage on hold when he sees an old flame in a restaurant. Years earlier she had left him without warning and, with his interest rekindled, he sets about tracking her down.

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9:51 AM

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tuesday 2 Survivors BBC1, 9pm Bit of a slow starter but as with every post-apocalyptic drama, it’s the people you’ve got to feel invested in for it to work. Picked yours yet? Yuppie Arab? Scary (as much as lovely Max Beesley can be scary) violent criminal?

Lady doctor? Or maybe it’s the last surviving member of the government. She turns up here.

Comedy Classics: The New Statesman ITV1, 10.40pm The last in this series focuses on the political satire/outright attack first broadcast in 1987. As the personification of Tory sleaze, central figure Alan B’Stard, played with gusto by Rik Mayall, was the most right-wing Tory who then switched to New Labour. With cast interviews.

Spendaholics BBC3, 7pm Even if you haven’t got a spending habit that sees you haemorrhaging dosh like Elton John, this is still worth a tune in.

Psychological coach Benjamin Fry and lifestyle expert Jay Hunt this week give Essex receptionist Shannon a helping hand with her 26k debt, with tips that might be helpful in the Christmas run-up.

terrestrial

sport

BBC1

BBC2

ITV1

Channel 4

Five

Sky Sports 1

6.00am Breakfast 9.15 Hospital Heroes 10.00 Homes Under The Hammer 11.00 Buy It, Sell It, Bank It? 11.45 Cash In The Attic 12.15pm Bargain Hunt 1.00 BBC News At One 1.30 South East Today 1.45 Doctors 2.15 Diagnosis Murder 3.00 BBC News 3.05 Jakers: The Adventures Of Piggley Winks 3.25 Uncle Max 3.40 Watch My Chops 3.50 The Secret Show 4.05 Raven 4.34 The Owl 4.35 Blue Peter 5.00 Newsround 5.15 The Weakest Link

6.00 – 10am Children’s television 10.00 Something Special 10.15 Get Squiggling 10.30 In The Night Garden 11.00 KS1 Science Clips 11.10 Primary Geography 11.30 The Chronicles Of Narnia 11.45 Watch 12.00pm Open Gardens 12.30 Working Lunch 1.00 Out Of The Blue 1.25 Coast 1.30 Real Rescues 2.00 Gardeners’ World Top Tips 2.30 Nature’s Top 40 3.00 Murder, She Wrote 3.45 Flog It! 4.30 Are You An Egghead?

5.15 Bargain Hunt Famous Finds

6.00am GMTV 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 10.30 This Morning 11.15 ITV News And Weather 11.20 Meridian News And Weather 11.25 This Morning 12.30pm Loose Women 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News And Weather 2.00 House Guest 2.30 Dickinson’s Real Deal 3.15 Spin Star 4.00 Rosemary Shrager’s School For Cooks 5.00 Golden Balls

6.00am The Cubeez 6.10 The Hoobs 6.35 Planet Cook 7.00 Freshly Squeezed 7.25 Everybody Loves Raymond 7.55 Just Shoot Me 8.25 The Class 9.00 Frasier 9.35 Search For Cool 10.35 Teen Trouble 11.30 Battlefront 12.00pm News At Noon 12.35 A Brief History Of Fun 12.50 Supernanny US 1.45 FILM: Dragoon Wells Massacre (1957) 3.25 Countdown 4.15 Deal Or No Deal 5.00 The Paul O’Grady Show

6.00 – 9.00am Children’s television 9.00 The Wright Stuff 10.30 Trisha Goddard 11.30 Zoo Days 12.00pm Britain’s Vanishing Views 12.30 Five News 12.45 Going For Gold 1.45 Neighbours 2.15 Home And Away 2.50 Going For Gold Extra 3.00 FILM: Jack (2004) 5.00 Five News With Matt Barbet 5.30 Neighbours

6.00am Good Morning Sports Fans 6.30 Good Morning Sports Fans 7.00 Good Morning Sports Fans 8.00 UEFA Champions League Weekly 8.30 LIVE International Cricket 12.00pm LIVE International Cricket 5.30 Football Asia 6.00 Revista De La Liga 7.00 Big Fight Countdown 7.30 LIVE Carling Cup Football 10.00 Big Fight Countdown 10.30 International Cricket 12.30am Big Fight Countdown 1.00 Carling Cup Football 2.30 Big Fight Countdown 3.00 World Motor Sport 5.30 Football Asia

6.00 BBC News At Six 6.30 South East Today 7.00 The One Show 7.30 EastEnders At the hospital, Sean and Roxy come face to face with both the joys and the horrors of parenthood. Gold-plated baby sick.

7.57 BBC News; Regional News 8.00 Holby City Linden pulls out all the stops to give a comatose Callie everything she needs to speed her recovery, but has he just made matters worse? More than likely.

This is Holby, not Camberwick Green, where the right thing happens.

9.00 Survivors See highlights.

10.00 BBC News At Ten 10.25 South East Today 10.33 BBC Weather 10.35 Imagine... Heavy Metal In Baghdad Documentary following the struggles of Iraq’s only metal band, Acrassicauda, and tells its own story about the horror of daily life in the war-torn city.

11.25 FILM: A Simple Plan (1999) Starring Bill Paxton, Billy Bob Thornton and Gary Cole. Thriller about three men who find millions of dollars in the wreck of a single-engine plane buried in the deep snow of a Minnesota winter.

1.20am Weatherview 1.25 Sign Zone: See Hear 1.55 Oceans: Sea Of Cortez 2.55 Credit Crash Britain 3.25 Helicopter Heroes 4.55 Joins BBC News

6.00 Eggheads Jeremy Vine hosts a general knowledge quiz.

6.30 Strictly Come Dancing – It Takes Two Claudia is joined by this week’s saved couple.

7.00 Delia Delia Smith shares five recipes that take the stress out of cooking for friends.

7.30 All Over The Shop Business guru Geoff Burch gives Leicester’s small shopkeepers a lesson in basic maths.

8.00 Natural World The gharial, the world’s oldest crocodilian, is on the very edge of extinction. These bizarre fish-eating reptiles were already critically endangered, then last winter they were decimated by a mystery die-off. Reptile expert Rom Whitaker investigates.

9.00 Horizon: Do You Know What Time It Is? Particle physicist Professor Brian Cox asks, ‘What time is it?’ Do we really know what it is that he’s asking? This could go on for a while.

10.00 The Culture Show Michael Sheen talks about his forthcoming role as David Frost in Ron Howard’s film Frost/Nixon.

10.30 Newsnight 11.20 Band Of Brothers Wartime drama series.

12.15am Russia: A Journey With Jonathan Dimbleby 1.15 BBC News 4.00 Vocational Bitesize

6.00 Meridian Tonight 6.30 ITV Evening News; Weather 7.00 Emmerdale Tragedy strikes when Jasmine and Debbie defend themselves against Shane. Nasty ruffian!

8.00 Who Wants To Be A Millionaire? Stupid question.

Obviously the answer is whoever is in charge of those phonelines you call in to try and get to the Fastest Finger round. Millions and millions they’ve got by now.

8.30 I’m A Celebrity... Get Me Out Of Here! After surviving hunger, bugs and each other, one more celebrity must leave jungle life for good and head back to a life of luxury. Regret through gritted teeth.Chin chin!

10.00 News At Ten; Weather 10.40 Comedy Classics: The New Statesman See highlights.

11.40 Guinness Premiership Rugby Craig Doyle presents all the highlights from the seventh round which took place over the weekend.

Champions Wasps were at home to Sale, plus Gloucester v Bristol, Worcester v Newcastle, Northampton v Bath, Leicester v Harlequins and London Irish v Saracens.

12.30am Nightwatch With Steve Scott: Crime 1.25 Loose Women 2.15 The Jeremy Kyle Show 3.10 ITV Nightscreen 5.30 ITV Early Morning News

6.00 The Simpsons 6.30 Hollyoaks Sarah struggles to cope with her feelings towards Zoe after their encounter. Is this some Electra response to her Mum stealing her first boyfriend – stealing her Dad’s girlfriend? All Greek to us.

7.00 Channel 4 News 7.55 The Political Slot: Conservative 8.00 How To Look Good Naked Expert stylist Gok Wan revisits Helen Thompson.

9.00 The Queen’s Coronation: Behind Palace Doors Documentary uncovering the tensions and conflict between the Queen Mother and Prince Philip in the build up to Princess Elizabeth’s coronation.

10.00 Man Hunters: Sex Trips For Girls Two-part documentary exploring the growing trend of British women taking holidays purely for seeking out loving or strictly sexual relationships with young local men.

11.05 Hollyoaks Later Steph and Craig are distraught having discovered Tom is missing.

12.10am 4 Music: Franz Ferdinand: Video Exclusive 12.15 PokerStars.com Poker Tour 1.15 FIVB Beach Volleyball 2.15 FIA GT Championship 2.45 Adrenalin Rush 3.10 KOTV Classics 4.00 Forum: Once Upon A Planet (x3) 5.00 We Are From... (x4)

6.00 Home And Away Ross and Morag leave Summer Bay. Bye! 6.30 Zoo Days The weather continues to wreak havoc at flamingo HQ. Truly.

7.00 Five News At 7 7.30 Highland Emergency The Royal Navy races to save a seriously ill infant; and the Coastguard attempts a dangerous rescue in high seas and gale-force winds.

8.00 Special Forces Heroes This instalment recounts the execution of Operation Barras – dubbed Operation Certain Death by soldiers.

9.00 CSI: Miami While investigating a death at the bottom of a sinkhole, the team discover a tunnel leading to a bank vault. Curiouser and curiouser.

10.00 CSI: NY When Mac and Stella investigate the shooting of a deaf woman, the truth about Lindsay’s traumatic past comes to light. Danny takes on the case of a murdered figure skater, and wonders if the victim was really the killer’s target.

11.00 CSI: NY Danny and Hawkes become immersed in the popular sport of grocery cart races when a player becomes a victim. See, your mother was right when she said not.

12.00am The FBI Files 1.00 NBA Basketball 3.40 Boxing USA 4.45 Motorsport Mundial 5.10 Neighbours 5.35 Home And Away

Sky Sports 2 6.00am LIVE Test Cricket 7.00 Wild Spirits 7.30 H2O Sports International 8.00 Golf 9.00 Big League Weekend 10.30 Soccer AM: The Best Bits 11.30 H2O Sports International 12.00pm Big League Weekend 1.30 H2O Sports International 2.00 IRB Rugby Sevens 5.00 NFL: Total Access 6.00 Motor Sport 7.00 Weston Beach Race 8.00 International Cricket 10.00 Poker Million 12.00am NFL :Total Access 1.00 Bowls

Sky Sports 3 6.00am Aerobics: Oz Style 6.30 Snow Adventures 7.00 WWE Afterburn 8.00 Fishing: Thinking Tackle 9.00 Bowls 11.00 Racing News 11.30 Aerobics: Oz Style 12.00pm Fishing: Thinking Tackle 1.00 NFL: Total Access 2.00 Golf 3.00 NFL 5.00 WWE Smackdown 7.00 Mountain Bike World 7.30 LIVE Greyhound Racing 10.00 Sports Unlimited 11.00 Hyundai A League 11.30 Football Asia 12.00am Revista De La Liga 1.00 Weston Beach Race 2.00 Sports Unlimited

Victoria Nangle

extraterrestrial Sky1

BBC3

BBC4

ITV2

ITV3

E4

More4

Living

2.00pm Law And Order 3.00 Cold Case 4.00 Stargate Atlantis 5.00 The Lion Man (x2) 6.00 Malcolm In The Middle 6.30 Futurama 7.00 The Simpsons (x2) 8.00 Stargate Atlantis 9.00 Ross Kemp On Gangs 10.00 Prison Break 11.00 Drug Wars: DEA. 12.00am Road Wars (x2) 1.50 Caribbean Uncovered

7.00pm Spendaholics. See highlights. 8.00 Dog Borstal 9.00 Last Man Standing 10.00 EastEnders 10.30 Grownups 11.00 Family Guy (x2) 11.45 Clone 12.15am Last Man Standing 1.15 Dog Borstal 2.10 Grownups 2.40 Clone 3.10 Spendaholics 4.10 The Last Millionaire

7.00pm World News 7.30 Versailles Stories 8.00 The Thirties In Colour 9.00 Only Connect 9.30 Flight Of The Conchords Special: One Night Stand 10.00 That Mitchell And Webb Look 10.30 Charlie Brooker’s Screenwipe 11.20 Rather You Than Me 12.20am Only Connect 12.50 Charlie Brooker’s Screenwipe

1.30pm The Jeremy Kyle Show (x2) 3.45 The Ricki Lake Show 4.30 Sally Jessy Raphael 5.15 The Montel Williams Show 6.00 Judge Judy (x2) 7.00 FILM: Hulk (2002) 9.40 Planet’s Funniest Animals 10.00 I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here Now 11.00 FILM: Police Academy 5 (1988) 12.50am Entourage

12.15pm Agatha Christie’s Poirot 1.25 Heartbeat 2.25 Wycliffe 3.35 Kavanagh QC 5.10 Home To Roost 5.45 Heartbeat 6.50 Wycliffe 8.00 The Story Of The Costume Drama 9.00 FILM: Pride & Prejudice (2005) 11.30 Jane Austen’s Emma 1.40am The Story Of The Costume Drama 2.30 Kavanagh QC 3.50 Film File

12.45pm Scrubs (x2) 1.45 One Tree Hill 2.35 The OC 3.30 Gilmore Girls 4.25 Hollyoaks 5.00 Friends (x2) 6.00 Scrubs (x2) 7.00 Hollyoaks 7.30 My Name Is Earl 8.00 Friends (x2) 9.00 Smallville: Superman The Early Years (x2) 11.00 Skins 12.00am The Convention Crasher 1.00 Shameless 2.00 Peep Show

1.10pm Deal Or No Deal 2.00 Hill Street Blues 3.00 Brothers And Sisters(x2) 5.00 Grand Designs Abroad 6.05 Deal Or No Deal 7.00 Property Ladder 8.00 News 8.30 The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 9.00 Come Dine With Me 10.00 We Are Together 11.55 Come Dine With Me 12.55am We Are Together

2.00pm The Doctors Live 3.00 Grey’s Anatomy 4.00 Charmed (x2) 6.00 America’s Next Top Model 7.00 Will And Grace (x2) 8.00 America’s Next Top Model 9.00 New Most Haunted 10.00 Conversations With A Serial Killer 11.00 CSI 12.00am Grey’s Anatomy 1.00 Will And Grace (x2)

G.O.L.D.

Paramount

Discovery

Sci Fi

Sky Movies

Sky Movies

Film4

TCM

4.20pm My Family 5.00 As Time Goes By 5.40 Some Mothers Do ‘Ave ‘Em 6.20 Last Of The Summer Wine (x2) 7.40 Open All Hours 8.20 My Family 9.00 French And Saunders: Titanic Special 10.05 Only Fools And Horses 11.10 The Royle Family 11.50 Little Britain 12.30am French And Saunders: Titanic Special

3.00pm Becker (x2) 4.00 Two And A Half Men (x2) 5.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (x2) 6.00 Frasier (x2) 7.00 The King Of Queens (x2) 8.00 Two And A Half Men (x2) 9.00 South Park 9.30 Scrubs 10.00 Sex And The City (x2) 11.10 Grumpy Old Holidays 11.50 Big Day (x2) 12.50 Frasier (x2) 1.50 Cybill

2.30pm Unsolved Murders 3.00 Deadliest Catch 4.00 Time Team 5.00 Mythbusters 6.00 American Chopper 7.00 How Do They Do It? 7.30 How Stuff’s Made 8.00 Deadliest Catch 9.00 9/11: The Falling Man 10.30 Call 911 11.00 Couples Who Kill 12.00am Deranged Killers 1.00 A Haunting

11.00am Thunderbirds 12.05pm The Lost World 1.00 Quantum Leap 2.00 The Invisible Man 3.00 FILM: Thrill Seekers (1999) 5.00 Thunderbirds 6.05 Angel 7.00 The Invisible Man 8.00 FILM: Dark Storm (2006) 9.40 FILM: Replicant (2001) 11.40 FILM: Bubba Ho-Tep (2002) 1.30am Stephen King’s The Stand

11.25am Louisiana Purchase (1941) 1.10pm White Savage (1943) 2.30 A Medal For Benny (1945) 3.55 Don’t Bother To Knock (1952) 5.20 Charade (1963) 7.20 Louisiana Purchase (1941) 9.00 The Bridges At Toko-Ri (1954) 10.45 The Pawnbroker (1965) 12.45am A Medal For Benny (1945)

9.00am Earth (1998) 10.50 Mo’ Better Blues (1990) 1.00pm 35mm 3.40 Days Of Glory (2005) 5.50 Idlewild (2006) 7.50 Mo’ Better Blues (1990) 10.00 The Big Lebowski (1998) 12.00am Hard Candy (2006) 1.50 Pangea Day Highlights 2.20 The Cook, The Thief, His Wife And Her Lover (1989)

1.00pm Pom Poko (1988) 3.20 Anne Of The Indies (1951) 4.55 The Lady Vanishes (1979) 6.55 In Good Company (2004) 9.00 Bedazzled (2000) Liz Hurley temps Brendan Fraser out of his eternal soul – the cheeky devil.

10.50 Bullitt (1968) 1.05am L.I.E (2001)

7.10am Once A Thief (1965) 9.00 Dressed To Kill (1946) 10.30 King’s Row (1942) 1.00pm Mrs Soffel (1984) 3.00 Hot Millions (1968) 4.55 Ada (1961) 6.50 Logan’s Run (1976) 9.00 Plenty (1985) 11.15 Hysteria (1965) 12.50am The Subterraneans (1960) 2.50 The Power (1968) 5.00 Three Strangers (1946)

Classics

Indie

038_LS401_TV_Wed

11/26/08

9:50 AM

Page 1

wednesday 3 The Home Show Channel 4, 8pm If you can’t afford to move but your home just ain’t matching up to what you need it to do, this might give you some much needed inspiration. Brainchild of architect George Clarke, this adapts your home with the use of extensions redevelopment into what you really, really want. This week a London home gets the biz.

The Devil’s Whore Channel 4, 9pm C4’s cooking with gas tonight with this excellent line-up. Telling the tale of the English Civil War through the eyes of aristocratic Angelica, this is going down a storm. As is the King’s trial as Oliver Cromwell tries him for treason and makes himself the first head of the Republican government. Bye, bye protection.

The Last Millionaire BBC3, 9pm Encouraging the making of money through entrepreneurial means. Nice. And with only three teams left these are the ones to watch do it. This week they hit Naples with the challenge to build businesses around the theme of food and drink.

Originality and ingenuity sparks are flying all over the place!

terrestrial

sport

BBC1

BBC2

ITV1

Channel 4

Five

Sky Sports 1

6.00am Breakfast 9.15 Hospital Heroes 10.00 Homes Under The Hammer 10.30 The State Opening Of Parliament 12.15pm Bargain Hunt 1.00 BBC News At One 1.30 South East Today 1.45 Doctors 2.15 Diagnosis Murder 3.00 BBC News 3.05 Jakers: The Adventures Of Piggley Winks 3.25 Uncle Max 3.40 Watch My Chops 3.50 The Secret Show 4.05 Get 100 4.34 The Owl 4.35 Blue Peter 5.00 Newsround 5.15 The Weakest Link

6.00 – 9.00am Children’s television 9.00 Harry And Toto 9.10 Mama Mirabelle’s Home Movies 9.20 Charlie And Lola 9.30 Finley The Fire Engine 9.45 The Koala Brothers 10.00 Something Special 10.15 Get Squiggling 10.30 In The Night Garden 11.00 Wildlife On Two 11.30 FILM: Doctor In The House (1954) 1.00pm See Hear 1.30 Working Lunch 2.00 Gardeners’ World Top Tips 2.30 Nature’s Top 40 3.00 Murder, She Wrote 3.45 Flog It! 4.30 Step Up To The Plate 5.15 Bargain Hunt Famous Finds 5.55 Queen’s Speech Broadcast 6.00 Eggheads Jeremy Vine hosts a general knowledge quiz.

6.30 Strictly Come Dancing – It Takes Two Claudia takes a peek into the training rooms to find out how the couples are shaping up.

7.00 Top Gear Richard Hammond celebrates the 40th birthday of the Ferrari Daytona by taking one back to its spiritual home on the Riviera before attempting to beat James May and a multi-million pound power boat in a race from Portofino to St Tropez.

8.00 Oceans: Indian Ocean In the first of two episodes in the rich tropical waters of the Indian Ocean, the team explores its remote and pristine underwater worlds.

9.00 Heroes After reuniting Sylar and Elle, Arthur orders them to find Claire and bring her to him. Nathan and Peter Petrelli travel together to Haiti in search of the only man who can stop their father from destroying the world. Can you guess who it is?

9.45 Heroes Unmasked 10.00 Outnumbered Sitcom. The Brockmans attempt to revive 1950s values by banning TV and computers for one whole Sunday.

10.30 Newsnight 11.20 After Rome: Holy War And Conquest This first programme looks at the early history of Islam.

12.20am Long Way Down 1.20 BBC News 4.00 Vocational Bitesize

6.00am GMTV 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 10.30 This Morning 11.15 ITV News And Weather 11.20 Meridian News And Weather 11.25 This Morning 12.30pm Loose Women 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News And Weather 2.00 House Guest 2.30 Dickinson’s Real Deal 3.15 Spin Star 4.00 Rosemary Shrager’s School For Cooks 5.00 Golden Balls

6.00am The Cubeez 6.10 The Hoobs 6.35 Planet Cook 7.00 Freshly Squeezed 7.25 Everybody Loves Raymond 7.55 Just Shoot Me 8.25 The Class 8.55 Frasier 9.35 Leonardo’s Dream Machines 10.35 My Big Gay Prom 11.30 Battlefront 12.00pm News At Noon 12.35 Supernanny US 1.30 FILM: Please Sir! (1971) 3.25 Countdown 4.15 Deal Or No Deal 5.00 The Paul O’Grady Show

6.00 – 9.00am Children’s television 9.00 The Wright Stuff 10.30 Trisha Goddard 11.30 Zoo Days 12.00pm Britain’s Vanishing Views 12.30 Five News 12.45 Going For Gold 1.45 Neighbours 2.15 Home And Away 2.50 Going For Gold Extra 3.15 FILM: Night Scream (1997) 5.00 Five News With Matt Barbet 5.30 Neighbours

6.00 Meridian Tonight 6.30 ITV Evening News; Weather 6.55 Queen’s Speech Broadcast

By The Labour Party 7.00 Emmerdale The Dingles attempt to rescue Aaron from the MacFarlanes. With Dingles, attempting is half the battle done.

7.30 Coronation Street Carla’s wedding results in a horrifying revelation for Maria. Peter’s neglect of Simon incurs Ken’s wrath. ‘Cos he’s Dad of the year, the pious... fellow.

8.30 I’m A Celebrity... Get Me Out Of Here! The end is in sight for this year’s bunch of jungle celebrities, but first one more must swap life in the jungle for life in a luxury hotel.

10.00 News At Ten; Weather 10.40 Numb3rs The bodies of four Asian women are washed up on the shore, and the case becomes even more critical when one of them is found to have a strain of bird flu in her body. So Charlie studies ocean currents to determine where the bodies may have fallen in the water.

11.40 Carling Cup Highlights Jim Rosenthal introduces the best of the action from this week’s quarter-finals.

12.30am Nightwatch With Steve Scott: Emergency 1.25 Quincy, ME 2.20 Loose Women 3.05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 4.00 ITV Nightscreen 5.30 ITV Early Morning News

6.00 The Simpsons 6.30 Hollyoaks A hung-over Louise wakes and surveys the mess from the previous night’s fight with Warren.

7.00 Channel 4 News Including sport and weather.

7.55 The Political Slot: Liberal Democrats Political broadcast by the Liberal Democrats.

8.00 The Home Show See highlights.

9.00 The Devil’s Whore See highlights.

10.10 Desperate Housewives Lynette and Tom uncover the unsettling truth about Porter and Katherine’s secret is unveiled.

11.10 Girls Aloud: Video Exclusive 11.15 Hollyoaks Later When Steph tries to escape, Niall follows in hot pursuit. A drunk Sarah and Zoe take their night back to their B&B, where they cross the lines of friendship. For the late night show only, of course.

12.20am Smirnoff Experience: New York 12.50 4 Music: T-Mobile Transmission: Collaborations 1.10 4Play: The Making Of Monkey 1.25 What About Me? 1.55 FILM: Twisted (2004) 3.40 3 Minute Wonder 3.45 Scrapheap Challenge 4.45 3 Minute Wonder (x2) 4.55 Countdown 5.40 Making It 5.45 The Hoobs

6.00 Home And Away Rachel receives some devastating news.

6.30 Zoo Days Documentary series based at Chester Zoo. 7.00 Five News At 7 7.30 Highland Emergency The RAF fights to rescue two boys who have drifted out to sea; the coastguard is called to help a seriously ill seakayaker; and a team of mountain medics rescues an injured cyclist.

8.00 Combat Chefs Major Lomas organises a high-profile canape evening. Yum. 9.00 Dangerous Adventures For Boys Actor Todd Carty and his 11year-old son James take control of a 109-ton passenger steam train. The duo face fierce heat, back-breaking labour and intense pressure. Malebonding goes telly documnetary. Ah. 10.00 Ant And Dec: Where Did It All Go Right? Documentary charting their rise from child stars to pop stars, from BBC to ITV, from Byker Grove to Saturday Night Takeaway and from little-known actors to Britain’s best-loved TV personalities.

The backlash starts here?

11.05 Police Interceptors Documentary series.

12.05am PartyPoker.com Bad Beats And Killer Moves 1.05 NHL 3.45 FIM Motocross (x2) 5.10 Neighbours 5.35 Home And Away

6.00am Good Morning Sports Fans 9.00 Big Fight Countdown 9.30 Carling Cup Football 11.00 Revista De La Liga 12.00pm Big Fight Countdown 12.30 Carling Cup Football 2.00 Big Fight Countdown 2.30 Hyundai A League 3.00 Carling Cup Football 4.30 Big Fight Countdown 5.00 Revista De La Liga 6.00 European Tour Weekly 6.30 De La Hoya V Pacquiao 24/7 7.00 LIVE Carling Cup Football 10.00 Big Fight Countdown 10.30 You’re On Sky Sports! 11.30 FIFA Futbol Mundial 12.00am De La Hoya V Pacquiao 24/7 12.30 Carling Cup Football 2.00 Poker Million 4.00 De La Hoya V Pacquiao 24/7 4.30 Sports Unlimited 5.30 FIFA Futbol Mundial

6.00 BBC News At Six 6.30 South East Today 7.00 The One Show 7.30 Dom’s On The Case: Dentists Dom Littlewood is shocked to discover that almost half of UK residents have not seen an NHS dentist in the last two years.

7.57 BBC News; Regional News 8.00 Little Dorrit An unwelcome reminder of the old days comes to haunt Mr Dorrit in Venice.

8.30 Wild About Your Garden Nick Knowles attempts to give urban spaces a reverse makeover.

9.00 Rogue Traders Rogue Traders returns with a special episode. Matt and Dan track down gas fitters, electricians and locksmiths accused of ripping off their customers.

10.00 BBC News At Ten 10.25 South East Today 10.33 BBC Weather 10.35 The National Lottery Draws 10.45 Medium Drama series about a suburban housewife who can see the dead and read the minds of others.

11.25 FILM: Maiden Voyage (2004) Starring Caspar Van Dien. Action drama set on board a luxury cruise.

12.50am Weatherview 12.55 Sign Zone: Stephen Fry In America i1.55 The American Future: A History, By Simon Schama 2.55 The People’s Hospital 3.25 Indian Food Made Easy 3.55 Credit Crash Britain 4.25 Joins BBC News

Sky Sports 2 6.00am Aerobics: Oz Style 6.30 Snow Adventures 7.00 WWE Vintage Collection 8.00 Motor Sport 9.00 Snow Adventures 9.30 Mountain Bike World 10.00 Weston Beach Race 11.00 Poker Million 1.00pm Weston Beach Race 2.00 Motor Sport 3.00 Poker Million 5.00 NFL: Total Access 6.00 Trans World Sport 7.00 Total Rugby 7.30 LIVE International Rugby Union 10.00 Trans World Sport 11.00 NFL: Total Access 12.00am Total Rugby 12.30 International Rugby Union 2.00 Trans World Sport 3.00 Total Rugby

Sky Sports 3 9.00am Equestrianism 10.00 Sports Unlimited 11.00 Racing News 11.30 Aerobics: Oz Style 12.00pm Sports Unlimited 1.00 NFL: Total Access 2.00 Snow Adventures 2.30 Mountain Bike World 3.00 Sports Unlimited 4.00 Weston Beach Race 5.00 WWE The Bottom Line 6.00 WWE Afterburn 7.00 Equestrianism 8.00 Tenpin Bowling 9.00 Australasian Safari 10.00 BMX: Road To Beijing 11.00 Tenpin Bowling 12.00am Powerboat P1 Championship: Supersport Review 1.00 Triathlon 2.00 BMX: Road To Beijing 3.00 Australasian Safari Victoria Nangle

extraterrestrial Sky1

BBC3

BBC4

ITV2

ITV3

E4

More4

Living

1.00pm Project Runway 2.00 Law And Order 3.00 Cold Case 4.00 Stargate Atlantis 5.00 The Lion Man (x2) 6.00 Malcolm In The Middle 6.30 Futurama 7.00 The Simpsons (x4) 9.00 Diary Of A Mail Order Bride 10.00 Surviving: Dennis Nilsen 11.00 Britney: For The Record 12.30am Road Wars (x2) 2.25 Stargate SG-1 (x2)

7.00pm Doctor Who 7.45 Doctor Who Confidential 8.00 The Real Hustle: High Stakes (x2) 9.00 The Last Millionaire. See highlights.

10.00 Heroes 10.45 Family Guy (x2) 11.30 Last Man Standing 12.30am The Last Millionaire 1.30 Clone 2.00 The Real Hustle: High Stakes (x2) 3.00 Dog Borstal 3.55 Last Man Standing

7.00pm World News Today 7.30 Nation On Film 8.00 Francesco’s Venice 9.00 Travels With Vasari 10.00 FILM: 36 (2004) 11.45 Travels With Vasari 12.45am Francesco’s Venice 1.45 Vivaldi’s Women 2.45 Travels With Vasari 5.30 Close

3.45pm The Ricki Lake Show 4.30 Sally Jessy Raphael 5.15 The Montel Williams Show 6.00 Judge Judy (x2) 7.00 Smallville 8.00 FILM: Babe: Pig In The City (1998) 9.45 Sugababes: The Hot Desk 10.00 I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here Now 11.00 FILM: Dante’s Peak (1997) 1.10am Coronation Street

12.20pm Agatha Christie’s Poirot 1.25 Heartbeat 2.30 Wycliffe 3.40 Kavanagh QC 5.15 Home To Roost 5.50 Heartbeat 6.50 Wycliffe 8.00 The Story Of The Costume Drama 9.00 Mansfield Park 11.00 Life 12.00am The Story Of The Costume Drama 1.00 Kavanagh QC 2.20 Heartbeat

1.45pm One Tree Hill 2.35 The OC 3.30 Gilmore Girls 4.25 Hollyoaks 5.00 Friends (x2) 6.00 Scrubs (x2) 7.00 Hollyoaks 7.30 My Name Is Earl 8.00 Friends (x2) 9.00 The Big Bang Theory (x2) 10.00 Rude Tube 10.30 Beehive (x2) 11.35 Fonejacker 12.05am The Convention Crasher 1.05 Shameless 2.05 Peep Show

5.00pm Grand Designs 6.05 Deal Or No Deal 7.00 Property Ladder 8.00 News 8.30 The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 9.00 The Ascent Of Money 10.00 Hutch: High Society’s Favourite Gigolo 11.10 Snowdon And Margaret: Inside A Royal Marriage 12.15am Curb Your Enthusiasm (x2)

12.50pm Maury 1.45 The Fix 2.00 The Doctors Live 3.00 Grey’s Anatomy 4.00 Charmed (x2) 6.00 America’s Next Top Model 7.00 Will And Grace (x2) 8.00 Grey’s Anatomy 9.00 Private Practice 10.00 CSI: Miami 11.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 12.00am Grey’s Anatomy 1.00 Will And Grace (X2)

G.O.L.D.

Paramount

Discovery

Sci Fi

Sky Movies

Sky Movies

Film4

TCM

3.45pm My Family 4.25 To The Manor Born 5.05 As Time Goes By 5.40 Some Mothers Do ‘Ave ‘Em 6.20 Last Of The Summer Wine (x2) 7.40 Open All Hours 8.20 My Family 9.00 Only Fools And Horses (x2) 10.50 The Royle Family 11.30 Gimme Gimme Gimme 12.10am Only Fools And Horses (x2)

1.00pm Frasier (x2) 2.00 That 70s Show (x2) 3.00 Becker (x2) 4.00 Two And A Half Men (x2) 5.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (x2 6.00 Frasier (x2) 7.00 The King Of Queens (x2) 8.00 Two And A Half Men (x2) 9.00 Scrubs (x2) 10.00 Sex And The City (x2) 11.15 Grumpy Old Holidays 11.55 Scrubs (x2) 12.55 Frasier

2.30pm Unsolved Murders 3.00 Deadliest Catch 4.00 Time Team 5.00 Mythbusters 6.00 American Chopper 7.00 How Do They Do It? 7.30 How Stuff’s Made 8.00 Deadliest Catch 9.00 Rome 10.00 Egypt’s Top Ten Mysteries 11.00 Couples Who Kill 12.00am Deranged Killers 1.00 A Haunting

1.00pm Quantum Leap 2.00 The Invisible Man 3.00 FILM: Nature Unleashed: Volcano (2004) 5.00 Thunderbirds 6.05 Angel 7.00 The Invisible Man 8.00 FILM: The Haunting Within (2003) 10.00 FILM: What Lies Beneath (2000) 12.30am FILM: Emmanuelle In Space: Queen Of The Galaxy (1994)

2.00pm Johnny Guitar (1954) 4.00 King Kong Vs Godzilla (1962) 5.35 King Kong Escapes (1968) 7.20 The Far Country (1955) 9.00 Lover Come Back (1961) 10.50 Anne Of The Thousand Days (1969) 1.25am The Great Moment (1944) 2.55 King Kong Vs Godzilla (1962)

9.00am The Page Turner (2006) 10.30 A Fish Called Wanda (1988) 12.20pm Jindabyne (2006) 2.30 The Page Turner (2006) 4.00 The Proposition (1998) 6.00 Gloria (1980) 8.10 A Fish Called Wanda (1988) 10.00 Jindabyne (2006) 12.10am Happiness (1999) 2.40 Guy (1996)

1.00pm The Americano (1955) 2.40 The Raid (1954) 4.20 The Barefoot Contessa (1954) 6.50 Bogus (1996) Gerard Depardieu takes the invisible friend route and entertains his designated youngster. 9.00 Silent Hill (2006) 11.20 Asylum (2005) 1.15am Arlington Road (1999)

7.05pm Dinner At Eight (1933) 9.00 Hot Millions (1968) 10.55 Without Love (1945) 1.00pm International Velvet (1978) 3.00 Designing Woman (1957) 5.05 The VIPs (1963) 7.15 Codename: Emerald (1985) 9.00 Coma (1978) 11.00 Ransom (1956) 12.55am Demon Seed (1977) 2.45 Love Me Or Leave Me (1955)

Classics

Indie

039_LS401_TV_Thu

11/27/08

6:00 PM

Page 1

thursday 4 Apparitions BBC1, 9pm Taking a modern twist on possession, Mum’s favourite dishy Martin Shaw takes his dog collar to an abortion clinic, as you do. There he finds a pregnant woman who is possessed by unborn demons. Talk about prenatal depression and being unable to bond! Can he help create a happy family? Sure.

Never Mind The Buzzcocks BBC2, 9pm It doesn’t matter that Simon Amstell has stuck with movement of all of his floppy hair into one big flop in the middle, this is still fun, fun, fun. With regular team captain Phill Jupitus and special guest team captain Dermot O’Leary leading the way in this music quiz that’s more mayhem than quiz, this’ll be a blast.

Without A Trace More4, 10.05pm With an excellent cast including Anthony LaPaglia, Eric Close and Marianne Jean-Baptiste, this FBI show gives a reason for it all to fit within the time frame of the episode. They need to find the person and finding them closes the case. Nuff said. This week, the team searches for a man who worked in a women’s shelter.

terrestrial

sport

BBC1

BBC2

ITV1

Channel 4

Five

Sky Sports 1

6.00am Breakfast 9.15 Hospital Heroes 10.00 Homes Under The Hammer 11.00 Buy It, Sell It, Bank It? 11.45 Cash In The Attic 12.15pm Bargain Hunt 1.00 BBC News At One 1.30 South East Today 1.45 Doctors 2.15 Diagnosis Murder 3.00 BBC News 3.05 Jakers: The Adventures Of Piggley Winks 3.25 Uncle Max 3.40 Watch My Chops 3.50 The Secret Show 4.05 Raven 4.35 Election 5.00 Newsround 5.15 The Weakest Link

6.00 – 10.00am Children’s television 10.00 Something Special 10.15 Get Squiggling 10.30 In The Night Garden 11.00 The Maths Channel 11.10 Primary Geography 11.30 Something Special 11.45 What? Where? When?

Why? 12.00pm The Daily Politics 12.30 Working Lunch 1.00 Out Of The Blue 1.25 Coast 1.30 Real Rescues 2.00 Gardeners’ World Top Tips 2.30 Nature’s Top 40 3.00 Murder, She Wrote 3.45 Flog It! 4.30 Step Up To The Plate 5.15 Bargain Hunt Famous Finds 5.55 Queen’s Speech Response

6.00am GMTV 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 10.30 This Morning 11.15 ITV News And Weather 11.20 Meridian News And Weather 11.25 This Morning 12.30pm Loose Women 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News And Weather 2.00 House Guest 2.30 Dickinson’s Real Deal 3.15 Spin Star 4.00 Rosemary Shrager’s School For Cooks 5.00 Golden Balls

6.10am The Hoobs 6.35 Planet Cook 7.00 Freshly Squeezed 7.25 Everybody Loves Raymond 7.55 Just Shoot Me 8.25 The Class 8.55 Frasier 9.35 Leonardo’s Dream Machines 10.35 My Big Gay Prom 11.30 Battlefront 12.00pm News At Noon 12.35 Grudge Match 12.45 Supernanny US 1.40 FILM: The Sun Shines Bright (1953) 3.25 Countdown 4.15 Deal Or No Deal 5.00 The Paul O’Grady Show

6.00 – 9.00am Children’s television 9.00 The Wright Stuff 10.30 Trisha Goddard 11.30 Zoo Days 12.00pm Britain’s Vanishing Views 12.30 Five News 12.45 Going For Gold 1.45 Neighbours 2.15 Home And Away 2.50 Going For Gold Extra 3.00 FILM: Arthur Conan Doyle’s The Sign Of Four (1983) 5.00 Five News With Matt Barbet 5.30 Neighbours

6.00 BBC News At Six 6.30 South East Today 7.00 The One Show 7.30 EastEnders Events take a darkly unexpected twist when Jack visits Jim in his nursing home. That’s one mixed up muddled up Christmas storyline-coming family.

7.57 BBC News; Regional News 8.00 Little Dorrit Mr Dorrit leaves Amy behind in Venice as he returns to London with newlyweds Fanny and Sparkler, but the high life is not all he had hoped it would be.

8.30 The People’s Hospital Documentary series about life on the wards at Whipps Cross Hospital in London’s East End. Bet it’s got better electrics than Holby – and less money.

9.00 Apparitions See highlights.

10.00 BBC News At Ten 10.25 South East Today 10.33 BBC Weather 10.35 Question Time David Dimbleby chairs the political debate from Newry.

11.35 This Week A political review of the week presented by Andrew Neil and his resident helpers Michael Portillo and Diane Abbott.

12.20am Skiing Weatherview 12.25 Sign Zone: Panorama 12.55 Watchdog 1.25 Countryfile 2.20 An Island Parish 2.50 Credit Crash Britain 3.20 Helicopter Heroes 4.05 Joins BBC News

6.00 Eggheads Jeremy Vine hosts a general knowledge quiz.

6.30 Strictly Come Dancing – It Takes Two Head Judge Len Goodman is back with his dancing masterclass.

7.00 A Woman In Love And War: Vera Brittain Dramatisation of the life of Vera Brittain, a young woman who lived through the First World War, presented by Jo Brand for Remembrance Sunday.

8.00 Oceans: Indian Ocean – Coastal Waters The team explores the coastal waters of the Indian Ocean to discover what happens when the powerful Indian Ocean collides with the edge of a continent.

Big splash!

9.00 Never Mind The Buzzcocks See highlights.

9.30 The Graham Norton Show Graham dedicates the show to the music legend Barry Manilow, with showbiz chat and live performances from the man himself.

10.00 Lead Balloon A near-death experience turns Rick’s frown upside.

A perky Rick appears to annoy the heck out of all and sundry but does wonders for his career.

10.30 Newsnight 11.20 Louis Theroux: Law And Disorder In Philadelphia Repeat of Sunday’s show.

12.30am BBC News 4.00 Blast (x2)

6.00 Meridian Tonight 6.30 ITV Evening News; Weather 6.55 Queen’s Speech Broadcast

By The Conservative Party 7.00 Emmerdale Debbie and Jasmine beg Eli for help.

7.30 Country Ways A film portrait of the villages around Hartfield in Kent, during a week in May. 8.00 Who Wants To Be A Millionaire? Ten hopeful contestants compete to chicken out before they get to the big prize.

8.30 I’m A Celebrity... Get Me Out Of Here! Tensions rise as the series final looms. Time for another champagne craving to be sated.

10.00 News At Ten; Weather 10.40 Angel Of Death: Real Crime Nurse Colin Norris murdered four elderly patients, and attempted to murder another by injecting them with massive doses of insulin. If a suspicious colleague had not stopped him in his tracks, police believe he could have gone on to rival Dr Harold Shipman. Real Crime investigates.

11.40 The Last Word Phil Hornby talks through the big stories.

12.05am Nightwatch With Steve Scott: Emergency 1.00 Motorsport UK 1.25 Quincy, ME 2.20 Loose Women 3.10 The Jeremy Kyle Show 4.05 ITV Nightscreen 5.30 ITV Early Morning News

6.00 The Simpsons 6.30 Hollyoaks Warren returns home from hospital and Louise enjoys taking care of him, until Mandy confesses to their affair. Now, that’s not best friend behaviour, Mands!

7.00 Channel 4 News 7.55 The Political Slot: SNP 8.00 A Place In The Sun: Home Or Away As they prepare to get married, seasoned travellers Neil and Lindsey decide between a new life in Biarritz, Southern France and a home in East Devon close to their friends and family.

9.00 The Fun Police Documentary portraying the work of the Health and Safety Executive and its laboratories in Buxton, profiling the inspectors, consultants and council officials who protect the public from harm.

10.00 Star Stories Comedy series reimagining the bust-ups, love-ins and fall-outs of celebrities. A look at the life and career of Elton John.

10.35 Hollyoaks Later Malachy is furious with Mercedes for having revealed his HIV status to the whole of his local community.

11.40 Lily Allen: Video Exclusive 11.45 Fonejacker Comedy series.

12.15am The Law Of The Playground 12.45 FILM: Breakfast On Pluto (2005) 3.05 FILM: Music Of The Heart (1999) 5.00 Countdown 5.45 The Hoobs

6.00 Home And Away Melody has designs on Geoff. What? Again?!

Are these scriptwriters without a modicum of inspiration?

6.30 Zoo Days Keepers struggle to catch a colony of bats. Should be a new children’s cartoon series – Catch The Bats.

7.00 Five News At 7 7.30 UEFA Cup Football Live football action with coverage of the Group F clash between Aston Villa and Zilina at Villa Park. Martin O’Neill’s side will be looking to secure a place in the knock-out stages at the expense of the Slovakian side.

Presented by Colin Murray with commentary from Dave Woods.

10.00 FILM: Double Team (1997) Starring Jean-Claude Van Damme, Dennis Rodman, Mickey Rourke, Natacha Lindinger, Valeria Cavalli, Paul Freeman and Jay Benedict.

Thriller about a CIA agent who is interned for failing in a mission to kill an international terrorist. Escaping from his island exile, he teams up with a flamboyant arms dealer and together they set out to find the terrorist and rescue the agent’s wife and son. Buddy, buddy, buddy.

12.05am Quiz Call 4.00 V8 Supercars 4.45 Wildlife SOS 5.10 Neighbours 5.35 Home And Away

6.00am Good Morning Sports Fans 9.00 De La Hoya V Pacquiao 24/7 9.30 Carling Cup 11.00 Trans World Sport 12.00pm De La Hoya v Pacquiao 24/7 12.30 Carling Cup Football 2.00 De La Hoya v Pacquiao 24/7 2.30 Futbol Mundial 3.00 Carling Cup 4.30 De La Hoya v Pacquiao 24/7 5.00 FIFA Futbol Mundial 5.30 Carling Cup 6.30 Big Fight Countdown 7.00 LIVE Rugby Union: European Challenge Cup 10.00 Big Fight Countdown 10.30 Carling Cup 11.30 Soccerex 2008 12.00am Big Fight Countdown 12.30 Barclays Premier League World 1.00 LVE NFL 4.30 Big Fight Countdown 5.00 Carling Cup

Sky Sports 2 6.00am Aerobics 6.30 Snow Adventures 7.00 WWE 8.00 Watersports 9.00 Snow Adventures 9.30 Suzuki Swift Cup 10.00 Powerboat 11.00 Triathlon 12.00pm European Tour Weekly 12.30 Tenpin Bowling 1.30 World Motor Sport 4.00 Triathlon 5.00 NFL: Total Access 6.00 ATP Tennis 6.30 Airsports 7.00 Soccerex 7.30 LIVE Winning Post 9.30 Airsports World 10.00 LIVE Sky Poker Five-OO 12.00am European Rugby: Challenge Cup 3.00 Race World 4.00 Soccerex

Sky Sports 3 7.00am Motor Racing 8.00 Equestrianism 9.00 Total Rugby 9.30 International Rugby Union 11.00 Racing News 11.30 Aerobics 12.00pm Watersports World 1.00 NFL: Total Access 2.00 Snow Adventures 2.30 Suzuki Swift Cup 3.00 Australasian Safari 4.00 Tenpin Bowling 5.00 WWE Vintage Collection 6.00 Legends Of Motor Racing 6.30 Equestrianism 7.30 Carling Cup Special 8.30 Barclays Premier League World 9.00 WWE Late Night Raw 11.00 Extreme Championship Wrestling 12.00am Carling Cup Special 1.00 Soccerex 2008 1.30 Barclays Premier League World 2.00 Poker Victoria Nangle

extraterrestrial Sky1

BBC3

BBC4

ITV2

ITV3

E4

More4

Living

2.00pm Law And Order 3.00 Cold Case 4.00 Stargate Atlantis 5.00 The Lion Man (x2) 6.00 Malcolm In The Middle 6.30 Futurama 7.00 The Simpsons (x2) 8.00 Noel’s Are You Smarter Than A Ten-Year-Old? 9.00 Wives 10.00 Bones 11.00 Fringe 12.10am Road Wars (x2) 2.00 Caribbean Uncovered

7.00pm Best Of Top Gear 8.00 Last Man Standing 9.00 How To Rob A Bank 10.00 EastEnders 10.30 The Real Hustle: High Stakes 11.00 Family Guy (x2) 11.45 How To Rob A Bank 12.45am Last Man Standing 1.45 The Real Hustle: High Stakes 2.15 The Last Millionaire 3.10 Filthy Rich And Famous

7.00pm World News Today 7.40 The New Avengers 8.30 Beeching’s Tracks 9.00 Growing Babies 10.00 The Department Store: JT Morgan 11.00 BBC Four Session 12.00am Growing Babies 1.00 FILM: 36 (2004) 2.45 Growing Babies 5.30 Close

3.45pm The Ricki Lake Show 4.30 Sally Jessy Raphael 5.15 The Montel Williams Show 6.00 Judge Judy (x2) 7.00 Smallville 8.00 FILM: Inspector Gadget (1999) 9.35 Planet’s Funniest Animals 10.00 I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here Now 11.00 FILM: Bird On A Wire (1990) 1.15am Entourage Uncovered

11.10am The Casebook Of Sherlock Holmes 12.20pm Agatha Christie’s Poirot 1.25 Heartbeat 2.30 Wycliffe 3.40 Kavanagh QC 5.15 Home To Roost 5.50 Heartbeat 6.50 Wycliffe 8.00 The Story Of The Costume Drama 9.00 Life 10.00 Jane Austen’s Emma 12.20am The Story Of The Costume Drama

12.45pm Scrubs (x2) 1.45 One Tree Hill 2.35 The OC 3.30 Gilmore Girls 4.25 Hollyoaks 5.00 Friends (x2) 6.00 Scrubs (x2) 7.00 Hollyoaks 7.30 My Name Is Earl 8.00 Friends (x2) 9.00 How To Look Good Naked 10.00 Samantha Who? 10.30 FILM: Just Married (2003) 12.30am How To Look Good Naked USA

2.00pm Hill Street Blues 3.00 Brothers And Sisters (x2) 5.00 Grand Designs 6.05 Deal Or No Deal 7.00 Property Ladder 8.00 News 8.30 The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 9.00 Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares 10.05 Without A Trace. See highlights. 11.05 The Closer 12.05am Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares

2.00pm The Doctors Live 3.00 Grey’s Anatomy 4.00 Charmed (x2) 6.00 America’s Next Top Model 7.00 Will And Grace (x2) 8.00 The Underdog Show: Final 9.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 10.00 Grey’s Anatomy 11.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 12.00am Grey’s Anatomy 1.00 Will And Grace (x2)

G.O.L.D.

Paramount

Discovery

Sci Fi

Sky Movies

Sky Movies

Film4

TCM

4.20pm To The Manor Born 5.00 As Time Goes By 5.40 Some Mothers Do ‘Ave ‘Em 6.20 Last Of The Summer Wine (x2) 7.40 Open All Hours 8.20 My Family 9.00 Dinnerladies 9.45 Only Fools And Horses 10.50 The Royle Family 11.30 Gimme Gimme Gimme 12.10am Dinnerladies 12.55 The Royle Family

3.00pm Becker (x2) 4.00 Two And A Half Men (x2) 5.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (x2) 6.00 Frasier (x2) 7.00 The King Of Queens (x2) 8.00 Two And A Half Men (x3) 9.30 Rules Of Engagement 10.00 Sex And The City (x2) 11.15 Grumpy Old Holidays 11.55 Two And A Half Men 12.25am Kitchen Confidential

2.30pm Unsolved Murders 3.00 Deadliest Catch 4.00 Time Team 5.00 Mythbusters 6.00 American Chopper 7.00 How Do They Do It? 7.30 How Stuff’s Made 8.00 Bear Essentials 9.00 FILM: Born With Two Mothers (2005) 10.30 Heist 11.30 Call 911 12.00am Deranged Killers 1.00 A Haunting

3.00pm FILM: Hercules In The Maze Of The Minotaur (1994) 5.00 Thunderbirds 6.05 Angel 7.00 The Invisible Man 8.00 FILM: 10.5: Apocalypse (2004) 10.00 Dead Like Me 11.00 Dead Like Me 12.00am FILM: Emmanuelle’s Private Collection: Sex Goddess (2004) 1.50 Stephen King’s The Stand

1.30pm Road To Utopia (1945) 3.10 Alex Zane’s Guest List 3.40 Robinson Crusoe On Mars (1964) 5.40 The Palm Beach Story (1942) 7.20 Flaming Star (1960) 9.00 Broken Arrow (1950) 10.35 California (1946) 12.25am I’ll Never Forget What’s ‘is Name (1969)

12.50pm The Escapist (2001) 2.30 Letters From Iwo Jima (2006) 4.55 Nina’s Heavenly Delights (2006) 6.35 Nacho Libre (2006) 8.10 The Good German (2005) 10.00 The Counterfeiters (2007) 11.45 Going To Pieces: The Rise And Fall Of The Slasher Film 1.25am I Want You (1998)

1.00pm Anne Of The Indies (1951) 2.35 Only Yesterday (1991) 4.55 Bear Island (1980) 7.10 Catch That Kid (2004) 9.00 The Transporter (2002) Jason Statham runs fast and growls lightly in this action flick. 10.45 Final Destination 2 (2002) 12.30am Dick (1999) 2.25 Pickup On South Street (1953)

11.05am The Unsuspected (1947) 1.00pm It Started With A Kiss (1959) 3.00 Seven Brides For Seven Brothers (1954) 4.50 Little Women (1949) 7.00 The Sunshine Boys (1975) 9.00 Pat Garrett And Billy The Kid (1973) 11.15 Children Of The Damned (1964) 12.55am The Last Run (1971)

Classics

Indie

040_LS401_TV_Fri

11/26/08

9:52 AM

Page 1

friday 5 The 12 Crimes Of Christmas: Tonight ITV1, 8pm It’s a blimmin’ shame when we’re all up to our eyeballs with good cheer and a few rotters come wading in and prick holes in our balloons of delight. To ensure against that the Tonight programme looks at how to avoid the Crimbo crimewave – from dodgy toys to bogus charities.

Have I Got New For You BBC1, 9pm Too busy to watch the week’s news? Never mind. Have it delivered to you in a far more entertaining fashion catching this satirical side-swipe at world affairs and local shenanigans.

With team captains Paul Merton and Ian Hislop joined by panellists Andy Hamilton and Sarah Millican it’ll be grand!

The Story Of The Costume Drama ITV3, 8pm This final episode in the series explores the costume of the epic and adventurous side of period drama, from the sea-faring Hornblower to the battle-bound Sharpe. With stops off at Boudica and King Arthur and interviews with the cast, this is more than stitches and sequins.

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Channel 4

Five

Sky Sports 1

6.00am Breakfast 9.15 Hospital Heroes 10.00 Homes Under The Hammer 11.00 Buy It, Sell It, Bank It? 11.45 Cash In The Attic 12.15pm Bargain Hunt 1.00 BBC News At One 1.30 South East Today 1.45 Doctors 2.15 Diagnosis Murder 3.00 BBC News 3.05 Jakers: The Adventures Of Piggley Winks 3.25 Uncle Max 3.40 Watch My Chops 3.50 The Secret Show 4.05 The Revenge Files Of Alistair Fury 4.35 Dani’s House 5.00 Newsround 5.15 The Weakest Link

6.00 – 10.00am Children’s television 10.00 Something Special 10.15 Get Squiggling 10.30 In The Night Garden 11.00 Fun With Phonics 11.10 Focus 11.20 Focus 11.30 Primary Geography: A Village In Bangladesh 11.40 See You, See Me – Vikings In Scotland 12.00pm The Daily Politics 12.30 Working Lunch 1.00 Out Of The Blue 1.25 Coast 1.30 Real Rescues 2.00 Gardeners’ World Top Tips 2.30 Nature’s Top 40 3.00 Murder, She Wrote 3.45 Flog It! 4.30 Step Up To The Plate 5.15 Bargain Hunt Famous Finds 5.55 Queen’s Speech Response 6.00 Eggheads Quiz.

6.30 Strictly Come Dancing – It Takes Two The Friday panel previews Saturday night’s costumes.

7.00 Price Comparison Sites: Deal Or No Deal? The Money Programme’s Rachel Horne investigates the sites and examines the methods they employ.

7.30 An Island Parish There’s a big shock in store for the islanders as the result of the vote on the Revd. David’s future on Scilly is made public.

8.00 Mastermind Topics are WC Fields, Jonathan Creek, Tacitus and the life and career of Keith Moon.

8.30 Gardeners’ World As BBC Gardener of the Year is celebrating its 10th year this year, some past winners go head to head in a champion of champions battle.

9.00 The Barristers Documentary series following the work of barristers and their young colleagues.

10.00 QI The best bits that couldn’t be squeezed into the past series of this entertaining quiz.

10.30 Newsnight 11.00 Newsnight Review 11.35 The Culture Show Uncut Michael Sheen talks about his forthcoming role as David Frost in Ron Howard’s film Frost/Nixon.

12.20am BBC Four Session 1.20 Star Trek: The Next Generation 2.50 FILM: Hercules In New York (1970)

6.00am GMTV 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 10.30 This Morning 11.15 ITV News And Weather 11.20 Meridian News And Weather 11.25 This Morning 12.30pm Loose Women 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News And Weather 2.00 House Guest 2.30 Dickinson’s Real Deal 3.15 Spin Star 4.00 Rosemary Shrager’s School For Cooks 5.00 Golden Balls

6.10am The Hoobs 6.35 Planet Cook 7.00 Freshly Squeezed 7.25 Everybody Loves Raymond 7.55 Just Shoot Me 8.25 The Class 8.55 Frasier 9.35 We Are Together 11.30 Battlefront 12.00pm News At Noon 12.30 Supernanny US 1.30 FILM: Kidnapped (1971) 3.25 Countdown 4.15 Deal Or No Deal 5.00 The Paul O’Grady Show 6.00 The Simpsons 6.30 Hollyoaks A distraught Louise hides her heartbreak as she cares for Warren, and suggests they both take the time to write their wedding vows.

7.00 Channel 4 News 7.35 Unreported World Southern Thailand is home to one of the most violent conflicts in South East Asia as Islamic extremists wage a murderous campaign against Buddhist teachers.

The programme explains how primary schools have become battlegrounds.

8.00 Come Dine With Me Dinner party reality programme.

9.00 Gordon Ramsay: Cookalong Live Comedian Alan Carr joins Gordo for a curry night featuring a starter of shami lamb kebabs, a main of classic chicken tikka masala and dessert of marinated Bombay oranges.

10.00 The IT Crowd The IT mishaps have further comedic adventures.

10.35 Jimmy Carr Live: Comedian Comedian Jimmy Carr is on stage.

12.15am Star Stories 12.45 4 Music: The Shockwaves Album Chart Show 1.20 Beat Stevie 1.35 The JD Set Presents: Shortwave 1.50 Goalissimo!

2.50 KOTV 3.15 Trans World Sport 4.10 English Masters Beach Volleyball Blackpool 4.35 Freesports On 4 5.00 Countdown 5.45 The Hoobs

6.00 – 9.00am Children’s television 9.00 The Wright Stuff 10.30 Trisha Goddard 11.30 Zoo Days 12.00pm Britain’s Vanishing Views 12.30 Five News 12.45 Going For Gold 1.45 Neighbours 2.15 Home And Away 2.50 Going For Gold Extra 3.10 FILM: The Legend Of Sleepy Hollow (1999) 5.00 Five News With Matt Barbet 5.30 Neighbours

6.00am Good Morning Sports Fans 9.00 Big Fight Countdown 9.30 Carling Cup 10.30 Premier League World 11.00 Soccerex 12.00pm Big Fight Countdown 12.30 Premier League World 1.00 Carling Cup 2.00 Big Fight Countdown 2.30 Soccerex 3.00 Premier League World 3.30 Carling Cup 4.30 Big Fight Countdown 5.00 Premier League World 5.30 Big League Weekend 6.30 De La Hoya v Pacquiao 24/7 7.00 Premier League Preview 7.30 Live Heineken Cup Rugby 10.00 De La Hoya v Pacquiao 24/7 10.30 LIVE Friday Fight Night 12.00am Big League Weekend 1.00 Off The Bar 1.30 Premier League Preview 2.00 De La Hoya v Pacquiao 24/7 2.30 Friday Fight Night 4.00 Big League Weekend 5.00 De La Hoya v Pacquiao 24/7 5.30 Premier League Preview

6.00 BBC News At Six 6.30 South East Today 7.00 The One Show 7.30 A Question Of Sport Sue Barker hosts the sports quiz.

7.57 BBC News; Regional News 8.00 EastEnders Whitney’s guilt threatens to overcome her as Tony’s dark affections begin to shift towards someone else. Horrid weekend hook.

8.30 Parents Of The Band Drama series about a 1980s one-hit wonder who starts managing his son’s new band. Starring Jimmy Nail. Yup, this is what he’s doing nowadays.

9.00 Have I Got News For You See highlights.

9.30 Gavin And Stacey Stacey is getting used to being an Essex wife, but it’s not as exciting as she had hoped. No WAGs in Tesco?

10.00 BBC News At Ten 10.25 South East Today 10.33 BBC Weather 10.35 Live At The Apollo The cream of British stand-up comedy.

11.20 National Lottery EuroMillions Draw 11.25 Not Going Out Tim is worried that he is not manly enough.

11.55 FILM: The Legend II (1993) Starring Jet Li. Action-packed sequel.

1.25am Weatherview 1.30 Sign Zone: James May’s Big Ideas 2.30 Horizon: How Mad Are You? 3.30 Credit Crash Britain 4.00 Helicopter Heroes 4.45 BBC News

6.00 Meridian Tonight 6.30 ITV Evening News; Weather 6.55 Queen’s Speech Broadcast

By The Liberal Democrats By the Liberal Democrats.

7.00 Emmerdale Debbie, Jasmine and Eli struggle to dispose of Shane’s body. They’re not as easy as you might think. Awkward blighters.

7.30 Coronation Street Maria struggles to comprehend the shocking discovery she has made. Woman scorned ahoy! Look out ahead conniving Tony.

8.00 The 12 Crimes Of Christmas: Tonight See highlights.

8.30 I’m A Celebrity... Get Me Out Of Here! They have survived everything the jungle can throw at them, but now the final three must face one last Bushtucker Trial before the viewers vote for this year’s King or Queen of the Jungle!

10.30 TV’s Naughtiest Blunders More televisual cock ups.

11.00 The Late News; Weather 11.45 FILM: Lock Up (1989) Starring Sylvester Stallone and Donald Sutherland. Raw prison drama about an inmate’s violent conflict with a sadistic warden.

1.35am Planet Rock Profiles 2.00 Planet Rock Profiles 2.30 FILM: One Million Years BC (1966) 4.15 ITV Nightscreen 5.30 ITV Early Morning News

6.00 Home And Away Does Nicole have what it takes to be school captain? A cap?

6.30 Zoo Days A hot-headed crocodile shows his displeasure when he is transferred to a new compound.

7.00 Five News At 7 7.30 Demolition Squad The explosives engineers tackle an eightstorey office block in Bradford.

8.00 World’s Strongest Man Super Series Exclusive coverage of the World’s Strongest Man Super Series.

9.00 NCIS The team is called in when a marine’s wife is murdered live on the internet.

10.00 Law And Order: Special Victims Unit The team races against time to locate a kidnapped 18-yearold girl. The case is complicated when they receive a dubious offer of help from a man who claims to have had psychic visions of the missing teenager. The truth is out there.

11.00 Law And Order: Special Victims Unit A woman urges the detectives to charge her daughter’s boyfriend with statutory rape.

When the woman is found dead, the young lovers become prime suspects in her murder.

12.00am Quiz Call 4.00 Wildlife SOS 4.25 The Royal Institution Christmas Lectures 5.10 Neighbours 5.35 Home And Away

Sky Sports 2 6.00am Aerobics 6.30 Snow Adventures 7.00 WWE Raw 9.00 Race World 10.00 European Rugby: Challenge Cup 1.00pm Soccerex 1.30 Airsports World 2.00 NFL 3.30 Snow Adventures 4.00 Airsports World 4.30 Soccerex 5.00 NFL: Total Access 6.00 Snow Adventures 6.30 Gillette World Sport 7.00 Tight Lines 8.00 Big League Weekend 9.00 Off The Bar 9.30 Premier League Preview 10.00 Tight Lines 11.00 NFL: Total Access 12.00am European Rugby: Challenge Cup 2.30 Tight Lines 3.30 Ice Hockey

Sky Sports 3 8.00am Netball 10.00 Legends Of Motor Racing 10.30 Soccerex 11.00 Racing News 11.30 Aerobics 12.00pm Race World 1.00 NFL: Total Access 2.00 Snow Adventures 2.30 ATP Tennis 3.00 Trans World Sport 4.00 Race World 5.00 WWE Raw 7.00 Volvo Ocean Race 7.30 Snow Adventures 8.00 Equestrianism 10.00 WWE Smackdown 12.00am WWE Bottom Line 1.00 Equestrianism 3.00 WWE Smackdown 5.00 Gillette World Sport 5.30 Volvo Ocean Race Victoria Nangle

extraterrestrial Sky1

BBC3

BBC4

ITV2

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Living

1.00pm Project Runway 2.00 Law And Order 3.00 Cold Case 4.00 Stargate Atlantis 5.00 The Lion Man 5.30 Malcolm In The Middle (x2) 6.30 Futurama 7.00 The Simpsons (x4) 9.00 Wayne Rooney’s Street Striker 10.00 Britney: For The Record 11.30 Top 50 Celebrity Meltdowns 1.30am Road Wars

7.00pm Doctor Who 7.55 Doctor Who Confidential 8.00 The Real Hustle: High Stakes (x2) 9.00 Britain’s Missing Top Model 10.00 EastEnders 10.30 Family Guy (x2) 11.20 Summer Heights High 11.50 Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps (x2) 12.45 Grownups 1.15 The Real Hustle: High Stakes

7.00pm World News 7.30 Gergiev Conducts Mahler’s 6th Symphony 9.00 Legends: Nana Mouskouri – The White Rose Of Athens 10.00 Nana Mouskouri At The BBC 11.00 The Nana Mouskouri Show 11.45 Charlie Brooker’s Screenwipe 12.35am The New Avengers 1.30 The Avengers

3.45 The Ricki Lake Show 4.30 Sally Jessy Raphael 5.15 The Montel Williams Show 6.00 Judge Judy 6.30 The X Factor 8.10 The X Factor – The Result 8.40 FILM: Along Came Polly (2004) 10.30 I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here Now 11.30 Ghosthunting With...

I’m A Celebrity 1.30am Coronation Street

1.30pm Heartbeat 2.35 Jeeves And Wooster 3.40 Kavanagh QC 5.15 Home To Roost 5.50 Heartbeat 6.55 Jeeves And Wooster 8.00 The Story Of The Costume Drama. See highlights. 9.00 Northanger Abbey 11.00 Jane Austen...

Behind The Scenes 12.05am The Story Of The Costume Drama

12.45pm Scrubs (x2) 1.45 One Tree Hill 2.35 The OC 3.30 Gilmore Girls 4.25 Hollyoaks 5.00 Friends (x2) 6.00 Scrubs (x2) 7.00 Hollyoaks 7.30 My Name Is Earl 8.00 Friends 8.30 Friends 9.00 FILM: Batman (1989) 11.25 FILM: The Hole (2001) 1.25am Shameless 2.25 Get Your Act Together With Harvey Goldsmith (x2)

1.10pm Deal Or No Deal 2.00 Hill Street Blues 3.00 Brothers And Sisters (x2) 5.00 Grand Designs 6.05 Deal Or No Deal 7.00 Property Ladder 8.00 More4 News 8.30 The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 9.00 FILM: Men Of Honour (2000) 11.20 FILM: Kinsey (2004) 1.35am Millionaires’ Mission

11.55am Maury 12.50pm Maury 1.45 The Fix 2.00 The Doctors Live 3.00 Grey’s Anatomy 4.00 Charmed (x2) 6.00 America’s Next Top Model 7.00 Will And Grace (x2) 8.00 Nothing To Declare (x2) 9.00 CSI 10.00 Criminal Minds 11.00 CSI 12.00am Grey’s Anatomy 1.00 Will And Grace (x2)

G.O.L.D.

Paramount

Discovery

Sci Fi

Sky Movies

Sky Movies

Film4

TCM

5.00pm As Time Goes By 5.40 Some Mothers Do ‘Ave ‘Em 6.20 Last Of The Summer Wine (x2) 7.40 Open All Hours 8.20 My Family 9.00 Blackadder’s Christmas Carol 10.00 Only Fools And Horses 11.00 The Royle Family 11.40 Gimme Gimme Gimme 12.20am Blackadder’s Christmas Carol

2.00pm That 70s Show (x2) 3.00 Becker (x2) 4.00 Two And A Half Men (x2) 5.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (x2) 6.00 Frasier (x2) 7.00 The King Of Queens (x2) 8.00 Two And A Half Men (x2) 9.00 South Park (x2) 10.00 Sex And The City (x2) 11.10 Grumpy Old Holidays 11.50 Kitchen Confidential (x2) 12.50 Frasier (x2)

3.00pm Deadliest Catch 4.00 Time Team 5.00 Mythbusters 6.00 American Chopper 7.00 How Do They Do It? 7.30 How Stuff’s Made 8.00 My Shocking Story 9.00 Heist 10.00 Crime Scene USA: Body Of Evidence (x2) 11.00 Couples Who Kill 12.00am Deranged Killers 1.00 A Haunting

12.05pm The Lost World 1.00 Quantum Leap 2.00 The Invisible Man 3.00 FILM: Rocketman (1997) 5.00 Thunderbirds 6.05 Angel 7.00 The Invisible Man 8.00 Eli Stone 9.00 Sea Of Souls 10.15 FILM: Yeti (2006) 12.05am FILM: Emmanuelle 2000: Emmanuelle’s Sensual Pleasures (2000)

11.25am Lucky Jordan (1942) 12.50pm Rawhide (1951) 2.25 Forty Guns (1957) 3.50 The Great Man’s Lady (1942) 5.25 Lucky Jordan (1942) 6.50 Samson And Delilah (1949) 9.00 The Collector (1965) 11.05 The Night Of The Hunter (1955) 12.45am Seconds (1966) 2.35 The Collector (1965)

1.25pm The Tango Lesson (1997) 3.10 Little Children (2006) 5.30 Sky Movies Preview 6.00 New Police Story (2004) 8.05 The Top 10 Show 8.20 Tenacious D In The Pick Of Destiny (2006) 10.00 Fear And Loathing In Las Vegas (1998) 12.00am Lock, Stock And Two Smoking Barrels (1998)

1.00pm Bear Island (1980) 3.15 Pickup On South Street (1953) 4.50 The Silver Fleet (1943) 6.40 The Family Man (2000) 9.00 Transporter 2 (2004) Jason Statham is moving even more things from one place to another whilst looking buff and action-packed.

10.45 Four Brothers (2005) 12.55am In America (2002)

10.55am Of Human Bondage (1946) 1.00pm The Wreck Of The Mary Deare (1959) 3.00 The Jazz Singer (1980) 5.10 In The Good Old Summertime (1949) 7.05 The Cincinnati Kid (1965) 9.00 Westworld (1973) 10.40 Hit Man (1972) 12.20am The Best House In London (1968) 2.05 Adventures Of Tartu (1943)

Classics

Indie

041_LS401_TV_Sat

11/27/08

3:24 PM

Page 1

saturday 6 Merlin BBC1, 7.25pm Like watching Smallville when you’ve already seen Superman, watching Merlin when you have some idea of Arthurian legend can be both frustrating – they didn’t do that! – and fun as destined rivalries unravel. Like Morgana plotting revenge on King Uther. Should Merlin step in or let the troublesome king depart?

The British Comedy Awards 2008 ITV1, 9.15pm It’s back after a wary hiatus at the wisdom of feeding loads of funny people alcohol and letting them loose on live telly. Hosted

by Angus Deayton and featuring the likes of David Mitchell, James Cordon and Ricky Gervais jostling for Best Comedy Actor Award, this is the cream of Brit comedy.

The 100 Greatest Tearjerkers E4, 9pm Grab the hankies and wrap the duvet around comfortingly when you settle in for the night with tonight’s Jimmy Carr-hosted countdown. The best way to crack the hardest of hearted friends and watch them bawl like a baby. Expect ET going home and Bette Midler on a beach.

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BBC2

ITV1

Channel 4

Five

Sky Sports 1

6.00am Breakfast 10.00 Saturday Kitchen 11.30 Indian Food Made Easy 12.00pm BBC News 12.10 Football Focus 1.00 World Masters Darts 4.30 Final Score 5.15 BBC News 5.30 Regional News And Weather 5.35 Hole In The Wall

6.00am Tikkabilla 6.30 Teletubbies 7.00 Roar 8.00 The Secret Show 8.15 Sportsround 8.30 Gimme A Break 9.00 TMi 10.30 Gina’s Laughing Gear 11.00 The Secret Show 11.15 The Story Of Tracy Beaker 11.45 Eliot Kid 12.00pm Malcolm In The Middle 12.20 Malcolm In The Middle 12.45 Mission Beach USA 1.15 Sound 1.45 Revealed 2.00 Coast 2.10 FILM: The Life And Death Of Colonel Blimp (1943) 4.50 FILM: Rio Lobo (1970)

6.00am GMTV 9.25 Captain Mack 9.40 Emu 9.55 My Parents Are Aliens 10.25 My Life As A Popat 10.55 Finger Tips 11.15 Finger Tips 11.35 Planet Sketch 11.40 Coronation Street Omnibus 1.30pm ITV News And Weather 1.35 Meridian News And Weather 1.40 FILM: Buffalo Bill And The Indians (1976) 4.00 Midsomer Murders

6.10am The Hoobs 6.35 Planet Cook 7.00 Goalissimo!

8.00 The Morning Line 8.55 Orange UnsignedAct 10.00 Friends 10.30 Madagascar 2: T4 Movie Special 11.00 The Month With Miquita 12.05pm Reaper 1.00 101 Challenges 1.45 Channel 4 Racing 3.50 The TV Show 4.25 FILM: Carry On Doctor (1967)

6.05 Strictly Come Dancing Bruce and Tess host the celebrity ballroom dancing competition as the four remaining celebrities compete for the viewers’ votes. On hand as ever to give their expert opinions are judges Len Goodman, Arlene Phillips, Craig Revel Horwood and Bruno Tonioli.

7.25 Merlin See highlights.

8.10 The National Lottery Draws Gethin Jones gives false hope to half the country. It could be you.

8.20 Casualty Hospital drama. Ruth worries that Toby is having trouble coping after his night with Ben, and a chance accident brings a tragic love story to the hospital. No hearts and roses here, unless someone’s heart got mangled by thorns. Ugh. 9.10 Outnumbered Sitcom. Mum and Dad try to negotiate the living hell that is being trapped in a foreign airport with young children. Ben wants to know the Spanish for ‘Can I have a go with your machine gun?’ Not in the phrasebook?

9.40 BBC News 10.00 Match Of The Day Gary Lineker introduces the goals and highlights from the day’s seven Premier League fixtures.

11.20 FILM: Shanghai Noon (2000) Starring Jackie Chan, Owen Wilson, Lucy Liu. Comedy western-cum-martial arts caper.

1.05am Weatherview 1.10 Joins BBC News

6.40 Porridge Classic prison sitcom.

Fletcher gets a permanent job with the pigs on the prison farm.

7.10 Between The Lines: Railways In Fiction And Film: Timeshift Novelist Andrew Martin presents a documentary examining how the train came to shape the work of writers and film-makers.

8.10 After Rome: Holy War And Conquest Boris Johnson travels around Europe to continue his investigation into the early beginnings of what some people now call ‘the clash of civilisations’. Nothing too taxing on the old Mayor-front, then?

9.10 Have I Got A Bit More News For You Extended version of the popular news quiz. Hosted by David Mitchell with guest panellists Andy Hamilton and Sarah Millican.

9.50 Never Mind The Buzzcocks Comedy pop quiz with Simon Amstell, regular team captain Phill Jupitus, guest team captain Dermot O’Leary.

10.20 We Are Family Documentary on chart-topping family pop acts.

11.20 FILM: Merchant Of Venice (2004) Starring Al Pacino, Jeremy Irons, Joseph Fiennes. Michael Radford’s adaptation of Shakespeare’s play.

1.25am FILM: The Million Dollar Hotel (2000) Loosely structured mystery about the murder of a media mogul’s faded rock-star son.

6.00 Meridian News; Weather 6.15 ITV News; Weather 6.30 New You’ve Been Framed!

Harry Hill is our guide to more hilarious camcorder calamities and mobile phone mishaps.

7.00 The X Factor The stakes are high and the tension increases as the four remaining acts sing to impress the nation and secure a place in the X Factor Final. Can you match Diana’s hand movements? Weekend exercise.

8.15 Harry Hill’s TV Burp Harry’s back with another dose of ingenious quips, silly sketches and hilarious clips from the best of the week’s telly.

Who will fight this week, and how will Dean Gaffney feature tenuously?

8.45 The X Factor – The Result The four remaining acts discover the results of the public vote, and learn who will be leaving the competition before the all-important final. Tears before bedtime.

9.15 The British Comedy Awards 2008 See highlights.

10.45 The Big Fight Live Live coverage of Carl Froch’s WBC super-middleweight title fight against Canadian Jean Pascal.

11.50 ITV News And Weather 12.00am Nightwatch With Steve Scott: Mystery 1.00 Nightwatch With Steve Scott 1.50 FILM: Plain Truth (2004) 3.20 ITV Nightscreen 5.30 ITV Early Morning News

6.10 How Clean Is Your House?

Kim and Aggie come to the aid of asthma sufferer Marylyn who says that cleaning exaccerbates her condition. But her house is so filthy, her grandson has never been allowed to stay over. Dirty Grandma!

6.40 Channel 4 News 7.10 FILM: The First Wives Club (1996) Starring Goldie Hawn, Bette Midler, Diane Keaton. Satirical comedy about three former college friends who decide to get even with their philandering husbands.

9.10 The Devil’s Whore The country is in shock and divided as Oliver Cromwell puts the King on trial for treason and becomes the first head of the Republican Government.

10.15 FILM: Along Came A Spider (2001) Starring Morgan Freeman, Monica Potter. Thriller in which a brilliant forensic psychologist and a Secret Service agent team up to hunt down a psychopathic teacher who has abducted the daughter of a US senator. Guns don’t kill people, teachers do?

12.20am 4Music Presents... Kings Of Leon 12.50 The Month With Miquita 1.55 FILM: Whisky (2004) 3.45 Hill Street Blues 4.30 Countdown 5.15 Adrenalin Rush 5.40 Making It 5.45 The Hoobs

6.00am Sunrise 7.00 Harry And His Bucket Full Of Dinosaurs 7.10 Chiro 7.15 Milkshake! Music Box 7.30 Hana’s Helpline 7.45 The Adventures Of Bottle Top Bill And His Best Friend Corky 8.00 Little Princess 8.15 Franny’s Feet 8.30 The Beeps 8.50 The Mr. Men Show 9.05 Rupert Bear 9.20 The Milkshake! Show 9.50 Look! 10.00 The Gadget Show 11.00 World’s Strongest Man Super Series 12.00pm Zoo Days 12.30 FILM: Snow White (2001) 2.20 FILM: Last Of The Dogmen (1995) 4.30 FILM: Contact (1997) 7.00 Five News And Sport 7.15 NCIS A satellite operative inadvertently witnesses a murder whilst spying on a nude sunbather.

On how it’s right to perv.

8.10 NCIS The team is assigned another case when the leg of a missing marine is found in a dumpster in West Virginia.People are usually careful about what happens to their legs. Suspicious behaviour.

9.10 CSI: NY Stella and Flack investigate the death of a drag queen. Meanwhile, Danny and Mac look into the case of a high-powered extreme-sports executive found dead in a salt truck.

10.10 Law And Order: Criminal Intent Goren and Eames suspect an imprisoned white supremacist is behind the shootings of a judge’s family. Doesn’t sound like he has a good record for peace-loving. Could they be on to something?

11.10 The FBI Files Documentary series charting the work of the FBI’s crime lab. This instalment follows efforts to catch seven dangerous criminals who escaped from a highsecurity prison in New Mexico in 1987. Why can’t the tax evaders ever escape? Are the dangerous ones more tenacious?

12.10am Quiz Call 4.15 Wildlife SOS 4.35 The Royal Institution Christmas Lectures (x2)

6.00am Big League Weekend 7.00 Barclays Premier League Preview 7.30 UEFA Champions League Weekly 8.00 Boxing 9.00 Soccer AM 12.00pm Gillette Soccer Saturday 12.30 Live Ford Football Special 3.00 Gillette Soccer Saturday 5.15 Live Football League: Championship 7.25 Boxing 7.55 Big Fight Countdown 8.25 Football First: Game Of The Day 10.15 Football First: Match Choice 11.45 Football First: Match Choice 1.15am Football First: Match Choice 2.45 Football First: Match Choice 4.15 Spanish Football 5.45 Sky Sports Classics

Sky Sports 2 6.00am Triathlon 7.00 Tight Lines 8.00 British Ice Hockey 10.30 Big Fight Countdown 11.00 Boxing 11.30 Friday Fight Night 1.00pm LIVE European Rugby 3.30 LIVE European Rugby 5.30 LIVE European Rugby 7.30 LIVE European Rugby: Challenge Cup 10.00 Gillette World Sport 10.30 Volvo Ocean Race 11.00 NFL: Total Access 12.00am America’s Game 1.00 Spanish Football 2.30 Race World 3.30 Max Power 4.30 NFL: Total Access 5.30 Volvo Ocean Race

Sky Sports 3 6.00am Sports Unlimited 7.00 Gillette World Sport 7.30 Volvo Ocean Race 8.00 Race World 9.00 Sports Unlimited 10.00 WWE Smackdown 12.00pm WWE The Bottom Line 1.00 Max Power 2.00 Friday Fight Night 3.30 Boxing 4.30 WWE Smackdown 6.30 WWE The Bottom Line 7.30 LIVE Premier League Snooker 10.00 Extreme Championship Wrestling 11.00 WWE Late Night Smackdown 12.00am WWE Smackdown 2.00 WWE Late Night Bottom Line 3.00 America’s Game 4.00 Sports Unlimited 5.00 Race World

Victoria Nangle

extraterrestrial Sky1

BBC3

BBC4

ITV2

ITV3

E4

More4

Living

3.00pm FILM: The Librarian: Quest For The Spear (2004) 4.50 Bite Size Brainiac 5.00 The Simpsons (x2) 6.00 Noel’s Are You Smarter Than A Ten-Year-Old? 7.00 Futurama (x2) 8.00 UK Border Force 9.00 Road Wars (x2) 11.00 Street Wars 12.00am Prison Break 1.00 Road Wars 1.50 The Villa 2.40 Mile High (x2)

7.00pm The Real Hustle Las Vegas 7.10 The Real Hustle: High Stakes (x2) 8.10 Top Gear 9.10 FILM: Copycat (1995) 11.10 Family Guy (x2) 11.55 Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps (x2) 12.55 West 10 LDN 1.50 The Last Millionaire 2.50 Two Pints Of Lager And A Packet Of Crisps (x2)

7.00pm Crowdie And Cream 8.00 Tess Of The D’Urbervilles 9.00 Who Is Kurt Wallander? 10.00 Wallander 11.25 Mad Men 12.15am Who Is Kurt Wallander? 1.15 The Hard Sell 1.45 Tess Of The D’Urbervilles 2.45 Who Is Kurt Wallander? 3.45 The Hard Sell 5.30 Close

4.25pm FILM: Hulk (2002) 7.00 Superhuman: Super Strong 8.00 Vernon Kay: The Hot Desk 8.15 Xtra Factor 8.45 Planet’s Funniest Animals 9.15 Xtra Factor Results 10.00 No Heroics 10.30 Keith Lemon: The Hot Desk 10.45 British Comedy Awards 2008 - The Party 11.45 The X Factor 1.00am Xtra Factor

10.00am There’s Something About... Austen 11.00 Jane Austen... Behind The Scenes 12.05pm Jane Austen’s Emma 2.20 FILM: Fiddler On The Roof (1971) 5.50 Inspector Morse 8.00 Agatha Christie’s Poirot 10.15 FILM: Smokey And The Bandit (1977) 12.05am FILM: Fiddler On The Roof (1971)

6.00am Anything Goes 7.30 Our Showbiz Mates 8.30 Fresh Saturday 10.05 Gilmore Girls (x5) 2.30 Hollyoaks Omnibus 5.00 Friends (x2) 6.00 Supernanny (x2) 8.00 Friends (x2) 9.00 The 100 Greatest Tearjerkers. See highlights. 1.10am Friday Night Project 2.15 How To Look Good Naked

9.00am Time Team (x3) 1.10 FILM: The Vikings (1958) 3.30 3 Minute Wonder: Handsworth Conversations (x2) 3.40 Relocation, Relocation (x2) 5.50 Grand Designs Abroad (x3) 9.10 The Unsinkable Titanic 10.45 Pursuit Of Happiness 12.35am FILM: Magnolia (1999) 4.00 Close

2.55pm The Jerry Springer Show (x2) 3.55 Maury 4.50 The Fix 5.00 Home Video Heroes (x2) 6.00 Will And Grace (x2) 7.00 Criminal Minds 8.00 Ghost Whisperer 9.00 Conversations With A Serial Killer 10.00 Masters Of Horror 11.10 CSI 12.10am Charmed 1.05 Blood Ties

G.O.L.D.

Paramount

Discovery

Sci Fi

Sky Movies

Sky Movies

Film4

TCM

1.30pm Only Fools’ Top 40 Moments 3.30 TV’s Greatest Christmas Moments 5.30 Only Fools’ Top 40 Moments 7.30 Morecambe And Wise: The Greatest Moment 9.00 The Vicar Of Dibley 9.55 Porridge 10.35 Jonathan Creek (x2) 12.55am The Vicar Of Dibley 1.45 New Adventures Of Old Christine

5.00pm Everybody Loves Raymond (x2) 6.00 Two And A Half Men (x2) 7.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (x2) 8.00 Two And A Half Men (x2) 9.00 South Park (x2) 10.00 Chris Rock: Bigger And Blacker 11.25 South Park 11.55 Two And A Half Men 12.25am Dave Chappelle: Killin’ Them Softly

3.00pm Crime Museum UK With Martin Kemp (x2) 4.00 Crime Scene USA: Missing Persons Unit (x2) 5.00 My Shocking Story 6.00 Deadliest Catch (x2) 8.00 Chop Shop 9.00 FILM: The Boys From Brazil (1978) 11.30 Crime Museum UK With Martin Kemp 12.00am Unsolved Murders (x2) 1.00 Most Evil

11.30am Star Trek (x2) 1.30 Thunderbirds (x2) 3.40 Quantum Leap (x2) 5.40 V: The Mini Series 7.20 FILM: Thrill Seekers (1999) 9.10 FILM: What Lies Beneath (2000) 11.40 FILM: Emmanuelle 2000: Emmanuelle And The Art Of Love (2000) 1.20am FILM: Nature Unleashed: Volcano (2004)

8.50am The Devil And Miss Jones (1941) 10.25 The Grapes Of Wrath (1940) 12.35pm Sabrina Fair (1954) 4.55 Touch Of Evil (1958) 6.55 Some Like It Hot (1959) 9.00 Romeo And Juliet (1968) 11.20 The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance (1962) 1.30am Arabesque (1966)

9.25am Hollywoodland (2006) 11.35 The Passenger (1975) 1.45pm Best (1999) 3.35 Seven Swords (2005) 5.55 The Proposition (1998) 7.50 Hollywoodland (2006) 10.00 Boys Don’t Cry (1999) 12.05am I Want You (1998) 1.45 The Big Lebowski (1998) 3.50 China’s Hollywood

1.00pm The Family Man (2000) 3.20 Comanche (1956) 5.05 The Wrong Arm Of The Law (1963) 6.55 In Good Company (2004) 9.00 Mean Machine (2001) 10.55 The Hills Have Eyes (2006) Freaky horror film about mutants living in the backwaters of rural America.

1.00am Bamako (2006)

11.10am The Maltese Falcon (1941) 1.00pm Butterfield 8 (1960) 3.00 Whistle Down The Wind (1961) 4.50 Where The Spies Are (1965) 6.55 The Year Of Living Dangerously (1982) 9.00 Poltergeist (1982) 11.05 The Split (1968) 12.45am The Outrage (1964) 2.30 Four Horsemen Of The Apocalypse (1961)

Classics

Indie

042_LS401_TV_Sun

11/27/08

5:34 PM

Page 1

sunday 7 Take That Come To Town ITV1, 8pm Set in a magical venue of the band’s own creation, this spectacular one-off special sees Jason Orange, Mark Owen, Howard Donald and Gary Barlow perform some of their greatest hits along with material from their new album. Could it be magic?

Well it is if you like the Take That boys. Ahhh, bless ‘em.

Louis Theroux: Law And Disorder In Johannesburg BBC2, 9pm Louis Theroux travels to Johannesburg, where the residents find themselves besieged by crime. Despairing of the incapability of the police and the courts to protect them, many have turned to a private security offering protection for a price, but at what cost?

Charlie Brooker’s Screenwipe BBC4, 11.30pm Charlie Brooker takes an irreverent look at all aspects of life on the small screen. In a writers’ special, Brooker is joined by some of the best in the business to talk about how you make a TV programme actually happen. Expect Brooker to take no prisoners. Genius.

terrestrial

sport

BBC1

BBC2

ITV1

Channel 4

Five

Sky Sports 1

6.00am Breakfast 7.35 Match Of The Day 9.00 The Andrew Marr Show 10.00 Christmas Voices 11.00 Countryfile 12.00pm The Politics Show 1.00 ‘Allo ‘Allo! 1.25 Diagnosis Murder 2.10 EastEnders 4.05 Merlin 4.50 Songs Of Praise 5.50 BBC News

6.00am Tikkabilla 6.30 Teletubbies 7.00 Roar 8.00 Mona The Vampire 8.15 What’s New Scooby Doo? 8.35 Bring It On 9.00 Escape From Scorpion Island 10.00 Something For The Weekend 11.30 Rachel’s Favourite Food At Home 12.00pm Animal Park 1.00 Fred Dibnah’s Made In Britain 1.30 World Masters Darts 5.20 One Man And His Dog

6.00am GMTV 9.25 Art Attack 9.50 Prove It! 10.10 Finger Tips 10.30 Finger Tips 10.50 Planet Sketch 10.55 The Championship 11.55 ITV News And Weather 12.00pm Meridian News And Weather 12.05 FILM: Getting There (2002) 1.50 The X Factor 3.05 The X Factor – The Result 3.35 Meridian News And Weather 3.50 FILM: Star Wars: Episode I – The Phantom Menace (1999)

6.10am Planet Cook 6.35 Trans World Sport 7.30 English Masters Beach Volleyball Blackpool 8.00 Adrenalin Rush 8.30 Ironman 8.55 Friends 9.30 Hollyoaks Omnibus 12.00pm Orange UnsignedAct 1.00 Friends 1.35 Relentless 2.25 FILM: See Spot Run (2001) 4.15 The Simpsons 4.45 The Simpsons 5.15 Deal Or No Deal

6.00am Gillette World Sport 6.30 Football First: Match Choice 8.00 Football First: Match Choice 9.30 Sunday Supplement 11.00 Goals On Sunday 1.00pm LIVE Football League: Championship 3.30 LIVE Ford Super Sunday 6.30 Super Sunday: The Last Word 7.00 LIVE Spanish Football 10.00 Ford Football Special 11.30 Super Sunday: The Last Word 12.00am Spanish Football 2.00 Ford Football Special 3.30 Super Sunday: The Last Word 4.00 Spanish Football

6.05 Regional News and Weather Local news and weather.

6.15 Little Dorrit Fanny and Sparkler get married and return with Mr Dorrit to London, leaving Amy behind in Venice. Meanwhile, Arthur invests Doyce and Clennam’s capital in Merdle’s funds.

7.15 Antiques Roadshow Objects include a unique record of a Beatles recording session and a Russian painting.

8.15 Strictly Come Dancing: Results Bruce Forsyth and Tess Daly host the results and a special performance from Barry Manilow.

9.00 Wallander Detective Wallander delves deeper into the mystery of why two girls murdered a cab driver.

10.30 BBC News National and international news, weather.

10.50 Spooks Harry is imprisoned and accused by MI5 of being the Russian mole.

11.50 FILM: Steal (2002) Action thriller in which a group of young and imaginative bank robbers pull off a series of impressive heists using extreme sport skills to escape the police.

1.10am The Sky At Night 1.30 Weatherview 1.35 Sign Zone: Holby City 2.35 Survivors 3.35 Twiggy’s Frock Swap 4.35 Joins BBC News

6.00 Wild China Fascinating documentary series looking at unseen China. This week the spotlight is on the ancient tea-growing cultures, traditional seaweed-thatched villages, bird-filled wetlands, rare white dolphins, snake-infested islands and futuristic cities that jostle along China’s eastern seaboard.

7.00 Long Way Down In Northern Uganda, Ewan and Charley visit their second UNICEF site, where they hear the harrowing stories of former child soldiers. They then race to cross the Rwanda border before it shuts.

8.00 Top Gear The boys invade Greenham Common airbase to ask if the Communists ever made a good car. Plus, Boris Johnson is the Star in a Reasonably Priced Car. 9.00 Louis Theroux: Law And Disorder In Johannesburg See highlights.

10.00 Match Of The Day 2 Adrian Chiles is joined by Lee Dixon and Martin Keown for highlights of day two of Barclays Premier League games.

10.50 The Graham Norton Show Uncut Graham dedicates the show to Barry Manilow.

11.35 Heroes Matt, Hiro and Ando team up together and follow Daphne.

12.20am FILM: Joan Of Arc (1999) 2.50 BBC News 4.30 Inside Sport

6.30 Britannia High Lola is in love with sexy Stefan, the dance mentor – the only problem is that it’s all a fantasy. All hell breaks lose when the gang discover that Lola has been writing about Stefan in her diary.

7.30 Coronation Street Maria uncovers some disturbing facts surrounding Liam’s death.

8.00 Take That Come To Town See highlights.

9.00 I’m A Celebrity... Get Me Out Of Here! Coming Out Programme following all the celebrities from the moment they leave camp and get back into their old celebrity lives.

10.30 ITV News And Weather National and international news and weather.

10.45 The Mariinsky Theatre: The South Bank Show Programme celebrating the 225th anniversary of the Mariinsky Theatre in St Petersburg.

11.45 Britain’s Love Story First in a three-part series telling the story of the revolution in modern love, sex and marriage in Britain over the last 50 years.

12.45am Quincy, ME 1.40 60 Minute Makeover 2.30 Antiques Auction x2 3.20 I Want That House By The Sea 3.45 ITV Nightscreen 5.30 ITV Early Morning News

6.05 Channel 4 News Including sport and weather.

6.20 FILM: Miracle On 34th Street (1994) Starring Richard Attenborough. Christmas fantasy about a young girl who does not believe in Father Christmas.

But when a department store Santa convinces her otherwise, she discovers that miracles really can happen. Remake of the 1947 holiday classic.

8.30 Bring Back... Dallas Justin Lee Collins continues his quest to doorstep former entertainment stars and bring them back into the limelight.

10.00 FILM: Bulletproof Monk (2003) Starring Chow Yun-Fat, Seann William Scott, Jaime King and Karel Roden. Martial arts comedy, based on the comic book strip of the same name, in which a Tibetan monk enlists the help of a pickpocket in order to protect an immortality-giving scroll from a new generation of Nazis.

12.05am Brothers And Sisters 1.05 FILM: Camp (2003) 3.00 Supporting Acts 3.15 Unreported World 3.40 3 Minute Wonder: Where There’s A Will 3.45 Hill Street Blues 4.30 Countdown 5.15 Adrenalin Rush 5.40 Making It 5.45 The Hoobs

6.00am Children’s TV 7.50 Little Princess 8.00 Look! 8.05 Franny’s Feet 8.20 The Beeps 8.40 The Mr. Men Show 8.55 Rupert Bear 9.10 The Milkshake! Show 9.40 Mist: Sheepdog Tales 9.50 Roobarb And Custard Too 10.00 Secrets Of Egypt: Screaming Man 11.00 Dangerous Adventures For Boys 12.00pm Great Ocean Adventures: The Great British Sea Monster 12.50 Zoo Days 1.00 FILM: The Sword And The Rose (1952) 2.45 Five News 3.00 FILM: Steel Magnolias (1989) 5.10 FILM: Home Alone (1990) 7.05 FILM: The Pink Panther (2006) Starring Steve Martin, Kevin Kline, Jean Reno and Beyonce Knowles.

Steve Martin takes over from Peter Sellers as the inept Inspector Clouseau to solve the mystery of a murdered French football coach and retrieve the priceless Pink Panther diamond.

9.00 FILM: Just Cause (1995) Starring Sean Connery, Laurence Fishburne, Kate Capshaw, Blair Underwood, Ed Harris and Ruby Dee. Mystery thriller in which a Harvard law professor reluctantly gets drawn into the case of a young black man on death row in Florida for the rape and murder of a girl. The lawyer uncovers disturbing facts about the conduct of the police in the case, but just when he seems to have enough evidence to ensure the condemned man’s release, events take an unexpected twist.

11.05 FILM: Silent Cry (2002) See film highlights.

12.45am Great Australian Run 1.15 NFL American football 4.20 Now Is The Time: Night Of Combat 5.10 The Royal Institution Christmas Lectures

Sky Sports 2 6.00am Watersports World 7.00 Wild Spirits 7.30 Spanish Football 9.00 LIVE Masters Football 12.00pm Gillette World Sport 12.30 LIVE European Rugby 3.00 LIVE European Rugby 5.00 Gillette World Sport 5.30 NFL: Livewire 6.00 LIVE NFL 9.00 LIVE NFL 12.30am NFL: Top Ten 1.20 LIVE NFL 4.20 Wild Spirits 4.50 Close

Sky Sports 3 6.00am Hockey: European Hockey League 7.00 Squash: PSA Squash Tour 8.00 Squash: PSA Squash Tour 9.00 WWE:Afterburn 10.00 WWE Vintage Collection 11.00 Racing News 11.30 Wild Spirits 12.00pm Premier League Snooker 3.30 Wild Spirits 4.00 NFL: Total Access 5.00 WWE Experience 6.00 Hockey: European Hockey League 7.00 Wild Spirits 7.30 LIVE Premier League Snooker 10.00 WWE Late Night Afterburn 11.00 WWE Vintage Collection 12.00am Masters Football 3.00 Hockey European Hockey League 4.00 Squash: PSA Squash Tour 5.00 Squash: PSA Squash Tour

Alison Swann

extraterrestrial Sky1

BBC3

BBC4

ITV2

ITV3

E4

More4

Living

1.50pm Bite Size Brainiac 2.00 Gladiators: Battle Of The Forces 3.00 Malcolm In The Middle (x3) 4.30 Futurama (x4) 6.30 The Simpsons 7.00 Wayne Rooney’s Street Striker 8.00 The Simpsons (x2) 9.00 Fringe 10.10 FILM: Beverly Hills Cop (1984) 12.15am Bones 1.15 Road Wars (x2) 3.05 The Villa

7.00pm Dog Borstal 8.00 Don’t Tell The Bride 9.00 The Last Millionaire 10.00 Family Guy (x2) 10.45 FILM: Copycat (1995) 12.40am Clone 1.10 The Last Millionaire 2.10 Don’t Tell The Bride 3.05 Filthy Rich And Famous 4.05 Dog Borstal 5.30 Close x

7.00pm Travels With Vasari 8.00 Legends: Nana Mouskouri - The White Rose Of Athens 9.00 Nana Mouskouri At The BBC 10.00 Presenting Nana Mouskouri 10.30 Who Is Kurt Wallander?

11.30 Charlie Brooker’s Screenwipe 12.20am Mark Lawson Talks To John Le Carre

10.40am Emmerdale Omnibus 1.30pm FILM: Babe: Pig In The City (1998) 3.15 Coronation Street Omnibus 5.15 The X Factor 6.30 Superhuman - Giants 7.30 The X Factor - The Result 8.00 Britain Does The Funniest Things 9.00 FILM: Police Academy (1984) 11.00 Coronation Street 11.30 FILM: True Lies (1994)

10.10am Inspector Morse 12.20pm FILM: Smokey And The Bandit (1977) 2.10 Agatha Christie’s Poirot 4.30 FILM: Pride & Prejudice (2005) 6.50 Jeeves And Wooster 8.00 Agatha Christie’s Poirot 9.00 Housewife, 49 11.05 Liverpool One (x2) 1.15 Cagney And Lacey 2.10 P D James - A Certain Justice

12.30pm Roswell (x2) 2.15 Smallville: Superman The Early Years (x2) 4.00 The War At Home (x2) 4.55 Friends (x2) 6.00 Scrubs (x2) 7.00 Ghost Whisperer 8.00 Friends (x2) 9.00 Desperate Housewives (x2) 11.00 Samantha Who? 11.25 Sex And The City 12.25am Frost And Pegg’s Perfect Night In

9.00am Scrapheap Challenge (x4) 1.10pm Location, Location, Location (x5) 4.05 Come Dine With Me (x5) 6.55 Come Dine With Me At Christmas 8.00 Jamie At Home Christmas Special 9.05 100 Greatest Christmas Moments 11.05 Father Ted (x2) 12.10am Deal Or No Deal

2.55pm The Jerry Springer Show (x2) 3.55 Maury 4.50 The Fix 5.00 America’s Next Top Model 6.00 Kyle XY 7.00 Living With... Jade 8.00 Nothing To Declare (x2) 9.00 CSI: Miami 10.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation (x2) 12.00am Charmed 1.00 Blood Ties 2.00 Veronica Mars 3.00 Moonlight 3.55 The Cut

G.O.L.D.

Paramount

Discovery

Sci Fi

Sky Movies

Sky Movies

Film4

TCM

11.30am The Vicar Of Dibley Top 40 1.30pm Blackadder’s Most Cunning Moments 3.30 Morecambe And Wise: The Greatest Moment 5.00 The Vicar Of Dibley Top 40 7.00 Blackadder’s Most Cunning Moments 9.00 My Family 10.00 Jonathan Creek (x2) 12.15am My Family 1.20 Jonathan Creek

9.00am Two And A Half Men (x24) 9.00pm South Park (x2) 10.00 Chris Rock: Never Scared 11.35 Chris Rock: Bigger And Blacker 1.00am Dave Chappelle: Killin’ Them Softly 2.15 The Nathan Caton Show (x2) 2.25 Scrubs 2.55 Two And A Half Men (x7)

12.00pm Unsolved History 1.00 Unsolved History 2.00 My Shocking Story (x3) 5.00 American Chopper 6.00 Chop Shop 7.00 Deadliest Catch 8.00 Bear Grylls: Born Survivor 9.00 FILM: The Boys From Brazil (1978) 11.30 Crime Museum UK With Martin Kemp 12.00am Unsolved Murders (x2) 1.00 Most Evil

1.00pm FILM: Terminal Error (2001) 2.50 FILM: The Great Los Angeles Earthquake (1990) 4.50 Eli Stone 5.50 Thunderbirds 7.00 FILM: Odysseus And The Isle Of Mists (2007) 8.50 FILM: Lost City Raiders (2008) 10.50 Thunderbirds 11.55 FILM: Post Impact (2004) 1.45am Thunderbirds 3.00 Dead Like Me

12.15pm Anne Of The Thousand Days (1969) 2.45 The Poseidon Adventure (1972) 4.45 Billion Dollar Brain (1967) 6.35 Flight Of The Phoenix (1966) 9.00 The Man Who Knew Too Much (1956) 11.05 The Poseidon Adventure (1972) 1.05am A Medal For Benny (1945)

9.00am Away From Her (2006) 10.55 The Top 10 Show 11.10 Idlewild (2006) 1.15pm Hard Eight (1997) 3.00 Love Me If You Dare (2003) 4.40 The Castle (1998) 6.10 The Serpent (2006) 8.15 European Film Awards 2008 10.00 Repo Man (1984) 11.40 Gloria (1980)

1.00pm Bogus (1996) 3.10 Special Inspector (1939) 4.20 Escape To Athena (1979) 6.40 Corrina, Corrina (1994) 9.00 Master And Commander: The Far Side Of The World (2003) 11.35 Lights In The Dusk (2006) 1.10am Love Story (1970) 3.15 Close

7.10am The Fountainhead (1949) 9.10 Clash By Night (1952) 11.10 Night Must Fall (1964) 1.00pm Zigzag (1970) 3.00 Two Loves (1961) 4.55 The Journey (1959) 7.15 Soylent Green (1972) 9.00 The Dirty Dozen (1967) 11.35 Wise Guys (1986) 1.15am Slither (1973) 2.55 Cass Timberlane (1947)

Classics

Indie

043_LS401_TV_Mon

11/27/08

5:53 PM

Page 1

monday 8 The Last Days Of Steam: Time Shift BBC2, 7pm Documentary telling the story of how Britain entered a new age of steam railways after the Second World War. After the war, the destroyed railways of Europe were rebuilt to carry modern trains. Britain, however, built thousands of new steam locomotives.

The Gadget Show Christmas Special Channel 5, 8pm Suzi and Jason review the best gadget gifts for men and women; Dallas offers up some tips on how to bag a bargain when buying Christmas gizmos; and Jon goes on a search for the best high-definition television for his holiday viewing. Good to have someone doing your shopping.

Growing Babies BBC4, 9pm Laverne Antrobus investigates the theory of foetal-maternal conflict, believed by some to be blamed for a wide-range of disorders such as Tourettes, depression and autism. She also meets a scientist who believes he’s found the smoking gun of pre-eclampsia. Fascinating breakthrough science.

terrestrial

sport

BBC1

BBC2

ITV1

Channel 4

Five

Sky Sports 1

6.00am Breakfast 9.15 Hospital Heroes 10.00 Homes Under The Hammer 11.00 Buy It, Sell It, Bank It? 11.45 Cash In The Attic 12.15pm Bargain Hunt 1.00 BBC News At One 1.30 South East Today 1.45 Doctors 2.15 Diagnosis Murder 3.00 BBC News 3.05 Kerwhizz 3.25 Uncle Max 3.40 Watch My Chops 3.50 The Secret Show 4.05 Get 100 4.35 The Sarah Jane Adventures 5.00 Newsround 5.15 The Weakest Link

6.00am Kid’s TV 9.20 Charlie And Lola 9.30 Finley The Fire Engine 9.45 The Koala Brothers 9.55 Fun With Phonics 10.00 Something Special 10.15 Get Squiggling 10.30 In The Night Garden 11.00 Dangermouse 11.10 The Flintstones 11.35 The Flintstones 12.00pm The Daily Politics 12.30 Working Lunch 1.00 Out Of The Blue 1.25 Coast 1.30 Real Rescues 2.00 Gardeners’ World Top Tips 2.30 Nature’s Top 40 3.00 Murder, She Wrote 3.45 Flog It! 4.30 Step Up To The Plate 5.15 Bargain Hunt Famous Finds 6.00 Eggheads Quiz.

6.30 Strictly Come Dancing – It Takes Two Behind the scenes.

7.00 The Last Days Of Steam: Time Shift See highlights.

8.00 University Challenge Queen’s College, Cambridge do battle with the University of Warwick.

8.30 Indian Food Made Easy Anjum meets Jonathan Readman, and his Goan wife, Lorraine.

Jonathan never cooks but every Sunday takes advantage of his Indian connection by enjoying a Goan feast at mother-in-law’s house. Now Jonathan is going to attempt to cook for her and his family himself.

9.00 World War II Behind Closed Doors This fifth episode focuses on the dramatic story of the Red Army’s fight through Eastern Europe in 1944, as well as the behind the scenes history of the most famous Allied conference of the war in the Crimea.

10.00 Have I Got News For You With host David Mitchell, and Andy Hamilton and Sarah Millican.

10.30 Newsnight In-depth investigation and analysis.

11.20 Band Of Brothers Wartime drama series. News arrives that Hitler is dead.

12.15am Ellery Queen 1.05 BBC News

6.00am GMTV 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 10.30 This Morning 11.15 ITV News And Weather 11.20 Meridian News And Weather 11.25 This Morning 12.30pm Loose Women 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News And Weather 2.00 House Guest 2.30 Dickinson’s Real Deal 3.15 Spin Star 4.00 Rosemary Shrager’s School For Cooks 5.00 Golden Balls

6.10am The Hoobs 6.40 Planet Cook 7.00 Freshly Squeezed 7.25 Everybody Loves Raymond 7.55 Everybody Loves Raymond 8.25 The Class 8.55 Fat March USA 9.55 Charmed 10.50 Charmed 11.50 Supporting Acts 12.00pm News At Noon 12.35 A Brief History Of Fun 12.55 Supernanny US 1.50 FILM: The Story Of Robin Hood And His Merrie Men (1952) 3.25 Countdown 4.15 Deal Or No Deal 5.00 The Paul O’Grady Show

6.00 Meridian Tonight Local news and weather.

6.30 ITV Evening News And Weather National and international news, weather.

7.00 Emmerdale Debbie and Jasmine use Shane’s phone.

7.30 Coronation Street Maria is tormented by the circumstances of Liam’s death.

8.00 Airline It’s chaos at the speedy check-in.

8.30 Coronation Street Maria suspects that Liam’s death was no accident. Never!

9.00 Taggart A Polish migrant worker and hotel receptionist are discovered with similar gunshot wounds.

10.00 News At Ten And Weather National and international news and weather.

10.40 Deep Wreck Mysteries Second of a two-part episode looking at the SS Armenian.

11.10 Harry Hill’s TV Burp Harry’s back with the best of the week’s telly.

11.40 UEFA Champions League Weekly The sixth and round of UEFA Champions League group .

12.10am Nightwatch With Steve Scott: Crime 1.05 Nightwatch With Steve Scott: 2.00 Loose Women 2.45 Moving Day 3.40 ITV Nightscreen 5.00 CITVx5 5.55 ITV Early Morning News

6.00 The Simpsons Bart is caught stealing a video game.

6.30 Hollyoaks Louise plots Warren’s downfall as their wedding day approaches.

7.00 Channel 4 News Including sport and weather.

7.55 3 Minute Wonder: Rights Universal Series of documentaries made with Amnesty International to mark the 60th anniversary of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights.

8.00 The Ascent Of Money Landmark series in which Professor Niall Ferguson analyses the story of money and the rise of global finance.

9.00 Catastrophe Tony Robinson investigates the theory that natural disasters and catastrophes have shaped evolution and enabled human life to flourish.

10.00 FILM: A History Of Violence (2005) Crime thriller about a mildmannered restaurant-owner who becomes a reluctant local hero after killing two criminals who tried to rob his business.

11.50 FILM: Wicker Park (2004) See film highlights.

2.05am FILM: Grave Of The Fireflies (1988) 3.40 Titanic’s Ghosts 4.40 Hill Street Blues 5.30 Inuk 5.45 The Hoobs

6.00am Kid’s TV 7.25 The Mr. Men Show 7.35 Little Lodgers 7.40 Make Way For Noddy 7.55 Fifi And The Flowertots 8.10 Peppa Pig 8.20 Thomas & Friends 8.35 Rupert Bear 8.45 Pocoyo 8.55 The Milky And Shake Show 9.00 The Wright Stuff 10.30 Trisha Goddard 11.30 Behind Closed Doors 12.30pm Five News 12.45 Going For Gold 1.45 Neighbours 2.15 Home And Away 2.50 Going For Gold Extra 3.00 FILM: Hart To Hart: Two Harts In 3/4 Time (1996) 5.00 Five News With Matt Barbet 5.30 Neighbours 6.00 Home And Away Bartlett lets Kirsty’s dark secret out of the bag.

6.30 Zoo Days Samara the giraffe, must be anaesthetised for an operation. Getting her to the floor and back on her feet again safely calls for a massive team effort. Will the procedure go smoothly?

7.00 Five News At 7 National and international news.

7.30 Rough Guide To Great Weekend Breaks Julia steers clear of traditional tourist traps to explore the hidden side of Amsterdam; and Toby soaks up the imperial opulence of one of Europe’s most expensive cities – St Petersburg.

8.00 The Gadget Show Christmas Special Suzi and Jason review the best gadget gifts for men and women.

9.00 Sex, Drugs And Rock ‘n’ Roll: The 60s Revealed Documentary series featuring never-before-seen footage of iconic figures from the 1960s.

10.00 FILM: Starship Troopers 2: Hero Of The Federation (2004) .

Sci-fi sequel.

11.55 Police Interceptors: Special Edition Special edition.

12.25am Disorderly Conduct 1.25 NFL American football 4.45 Race And Rally UK 5.10 Neighbours 5.35 Home And Away

6.00am Good Morning Sports Fans 6.30 Good Morning Sports Fans 7.00 Good Morning Sports Fans 8.00 Good Morning Sports Fans 9.00 Ford Football Special 10.30 Super Sunday: The Last Word 11.00 Spanish Football 1.00pm Ford Football Special 3.00 Spanish Football 5.00 Soccer AM: The Best Bits 6.00 Big League Weekend 7.30 LIVE Football League: Championship 10.15 You’re On Sky Sports! 11.15 Big League Weekend 12.45am UEFA Champions League Weekly 1.15 Sky Sports Classics 1.30 Live NFL 5.00 UEFA Champions League Weekly 5.30 Wild Spirits

6.00 BBC News At Six National and international news, weather.

6.30 South East Today Local news and weather.

7.00 The One Show Stories from around the UK. 7.30 Watchdog Latest consumer news and advice.

7.57 BBC News And Regional News Bulletin from the BBC. 8.00 EastEnders Bianca throws Whitney a sixteenth birthday party to remember.

8.30 Panorama Politician Margo MacDonald, suffering from Parkinson’s Disease, uncovers the truth about assisted dying.

9.00 Spooks With the Russians launching a nuclear strike, the only person who can help is the traitor among them.

10.00 BBC News At Ten National and international news, weather.

10.25 South East Today Local news and weather.

10.33 BBC Weather 10.35 A Question Of Sport Sue Barker hosts.

11.05 Inside Sport Gabby Logan’s sports news programme.

11.35 FILM: Shiner (2000) Starring Michael Caine. Downbeat thriller.

1.10am Weatherview 1.15 Sign Zone: Antiques Roadshow 2.15 Little Dorritx2 3.15 Helicopter Heroes 4.00 Joins BBC News

Sky Sports 2 6.00am Aerobics: Oz Style 6.30 Snow Adventures 7.00 WWE The Bottom Line 8.00 Aerobics: Oz Style 8.30 Snow Adventures 9.00 Premier League Snooker 11.30 Hockey: European Hockey League 12.30pm NFL Gameday 2.00 NFL: Top Ten 3.00 European Rugby Special 6.00 H2O Sports International 6.30 Wild Spirits 7.00 IRB Rugby Sevens 10.00 Showjumping: Spruce Meadows Presents 11.00 NFL: Gameday 12.30am NFL: Top Ten 1.30 Big League Weekend 3.00 Soccer AM: The Best Bits 4.00 Golf 5.00 You’re On Sky Sports

Sky Sports 3 6.00am Close 8.00 Masters Football 11.00 Racing News 11.30 Aerobics: Oz Style 12.00pm Volvo Ocean Race 12.30 Snow Adventures 1.00 Masters Football 4.00 Volvo Ocean Race 4.30 Snow Adventures 5.00 WWE Raw 7.00 NFL: Gameday 8.30 NFL: Top Ten 9.30 Irish Showjumping Premier Series 10.00 WWE Late Night Bottom Line 11.00 WWE Late Night Afterburn 12.00am Extreme Championship Wrestling 1.00 WWE Vintage Collection 2.00 WWE Late Night Raw 5.00 H2O Sports International 5.30 Irish Showjumping Premier Series

Alison Swann

extraterrestrial Sky1

BBC3

BBC4

ITV2

ITV3

E4

More4

Living

3.00pm Cold Case 4.00 Stargate Atlantis 5.00 Wayne Rooney’s Street Striker 6.00 Malcolm In The Middle 6.30 Futurama 7.00 The Simpsons (x3) 8.30 Futurama 9.00 Road Wars 10.00 Ben: Diary Of A Heroin Addict 11.00 Street Wars 12.00am Road Wars (x2) 1.50 Caribbean Uncovered

7.00pm The Real Hustle 7.15 Doctor Who Christmas Special 8.30 Clone 9.00 Little Britain 9.30 Summer Heights High 10.00 EastEnders 10.30 How To Rob A Bank 11.30 Family Guy (x2) 12.15am Summer Heights High 12.45 Clone 1.15 Last Man Standing 2.10 How To Rob A Bank 3.10 The Real Hustle

7.00pm World News Today 7.30 The Sky At Night 8.00 The Hard Sell 8.30 Only Connect 9.00 Growing Babies 10.00 Wallander 11.40 Growing Babies 12.40am Only Yesterday: The Carpenters’ Story 1.40 The Carpenters 2.20 The Carpenters: A World Of Music 3.10 The Sky At Night 3.40 Only Connect

3.45pm The Ricki Lake Show 4.30 Sally Jessy Raphael 5.15 The Montel Williams Show 6.00 Judge Judy (x2) 7.00 Smallville 8.00 George Sampson – Living The Dream 8.30 Planet’s Funniest Animals 9.00 FILM: True Lies (1994) 11.50 Coronation Street (x2) 12.50 FILM: Total Recall (1990)

10.40am Jeeves And Wooster 11.50 Heartbeat 12.50pm Inspector Morse 3.00 Jeeves And Wooster 4.05 Agatha Christie’s Poirot 5.15 Home To Roost 5.50 Heartbeat 6.50 Jeeves And Wooster (x2) 9.00 Super Sleuths 10.00 A Touch Of Frost 12.05am The Last Detective 1.35 P D James - A Certain Justice

10.00am One Tree Hill 10.55 The OC 11.50 Gilmore Girls 12.45pm Scrubs (x2) 1.45 One Tree Hill 2.35 The OC 3.30 Gilmore Girls 4.25 Hollyoaks 5.00 Friends (x2) 6.00 Scrubs (x2) 7.00 Hollyoaks 7.30 My Name Is Earl 8.00 Friends (x2) 9.00 FILM: Mean Girls (2004) 11.00 FILM: Batman (1989) 1.25am Shameless

3.00pm Brothers And Sisters (x2) 5.00 Grand Designs 6.05 Deal Or No Deal 7.00 Property Ladder 8.00 News 8.30 The Daily Show With Jon Stewart 9.00 The Home Show 10.00 Grand Designs Revisited 11.05 Without A Trace 12.05am The Closer 1.05 The Home Show 2.10 Grand Designs Revisited

1.45pm The Fix 2.00 The Doctors Live 3.00 Will And Grace (x2) 4.00 Charmed (x2) 6.00 America’s Next Top Model 7.00 Will And Grace (x2) 8.00 Kyle XY 9.00 America’s Next Top Model 10.00 Lipstick Jungle 11.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 12.00am Missing 1.00 Will And Grace (x2)

G.O.L.D.

Paramount

Discovery

Sci Fi

Sky Movies

Sky Movies

Film4

TCM

5.40pm Some Mothers Do ‘Ave ‘Em 6.20 Last Of The Summer Wine (x2) 7.40 Open All Hours 8.20 My Family 9.00 The Royle Family At Christmas 9.40 Only Fools And Horses 10.40 The Royle Family 11.20 Gimme Gimme Gimme 12.00am The Thin Blue Line 12.40 The Royle Family At Christmas

3.00pm Becker (x2) 4.00 Two And A Half Men (x2) 5.00 Everybody Loves Raymond (x2) 6.00 Frasier (x2) 7.00 The King Of Queens (x2) 8.00 Two And A Half Men (x2) 9.00 Rules Of Engagement (x2) 10.00 Sex And The City (x2) 11.10 Coupling 11.50 Courting Alex (x2) 12.50 Frasier (x2) 1.50 Coupling 2.30 Linc’s

2.30pm Unsolved Murders 3.00 Deadliest Catch 4.00 Time Team 5.00 Mythbusters 6.00 American Chopper 7.00 How Do They Do It? 7.30 How Stuff’s Made 8.00 American Chopper (x2) 10.00 Chop Shop 11.00 Couples Who Kill 12.00am Deranged Killers 1.00 A Haunting 2.00 Forensic Detectives

2.00pm The Invisible Man 3.00 FILM: Lost City Raiders (2008) 5.00 Thunderbirds 6.05 Angel 7.00 The Invisible Man 8.00 Medium 9.00 Eli Stone 10.00 FILM: Termination Point (2007) 11.50 FILM: Emmanuelle 2000: Emmanuelle’s Sensual Pleasures (2000) 1.40am Stephen King’s The Stand 2.30 Ghost Stories

12.10pm Broken Lance (1954) 1.50 The Movie Geek 2.20 Lover Come Back (1961) 4.10 Phantom Of The Opera (1962) 5.40 The Lady Eve (1941) 7.20 Here Come The Waves (1944) 9.00 The Adventures Of Robin Hood (1938) 10.45 Broken Lance (1954) 12.30am The Lady Eve (1941)

11.05am Schultze Gets The Blues (2003) 1.00pm Whatever Happened To Harold Smith? (1999) 2.40 The Page Turner (2006) 4.10 Wah-Wah (2006) 5.50 The General (1998) 7.55 New Police Story (2004) 10.00 Hard Candy (2006) 11.45 Warrior King (2005) 1.40am Hana-Bi (1997)

1.00pm The Americano (1955) 2.40 The Silver Fleet (1943) 4.25 Pom Poko (1988) 6.50 One Fine Day (1996) 9.00 Silent Hill (2006) 11.25 Bullitt (1968) 1.40am Asylum (2005) 3.40 Close

9.00am Two Loves (1961) 10.50 The Courtship Of Eddie’s Father (1963) 1.00pm Kim (1950) 3.00 Blossoms In The Dust (1941) 4.50 The Teahouse Of The August Moon (1956) 7.05 Hearts Of The West (1975) 9.00 Reckless (1984) 10.40 The Hunger (1983) 12.25am Cool Breeze (1972) 2.10 Little Caesar (1930)

Classics

Indie