Carolina Blitz, Fall 2022

Carolina Blitz Fall 2022

Drive Shack | Raleigh, NC October 27, 2022

CAROLINAS CHAPTER Carolina Blitz | Fall 2022 | 1

With all the freedom to move beyond the surface of your meeting destination. Deeply connect to signature experiences that leave lasting impressions.

Fully embrace the feeling of coming together in a place rich with intelligence, creativity and expertise.

Jump into Raleigh, N.C. 2 | Carolina Blitz | Fall 2022

visitRaleigh.com/meetings

In This Issue FEATURES Meet the Member. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 11 MPI-CC Annual Award Winners . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 17 Dissolving Our Limiting Boxes . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 18

IN EVERY ISSUE Our Annual Sponsors. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 3 President’s Message . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 5 Our Members . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 6 Monthly Meeting Planner . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 8 MPI-CC Board & Committee Chairs. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 9 Look Who We Spotted . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .12

Carolina Blitz | Fall 2022 | 1

Carolina Blitz The Carolina Blitz is the official publication of the Carolinas Chapter of Meeting Professionals International and is published quarterly. All contributions, articles, and photographs should be submitted to Publications Committee Chair/Editor one week after the meeting. Send to Cathy Mauldin, CMP - CathyMauldin@gmail.com EDITORIAL AND NEWSLETTER COMMITTEE VP of Marketing and Communications Nicole Filippo, CMP • Elon University Editor Cathy Mauldin, CMP • DESA, Inc. Onsite at CDM Smith Contributing Writers Brandon Crumpton, Key Signature Entertainment; Christine Irwin, CMP, The Management Company; Mitch Savoie Hill, CPC, SavHill Consulting, LLC; Rachel Whitten, Greenville-Pitt County CVB Photographer Tesh Parekh - IWP Photography Proofreaders Christine Irwin, CMP, The Management Office; Nancy Lowe, CMP, NC Medical Society; Peggy Anderson, CMP; Teresa Palmieri, Sheraton Imperial Hotel RaleighDurham Airport; Jake O’Dare, Aloft Greenville Downtown; Stephanie Trimble, GCT Chauffeured Services Publisher Christine Irwin, CMP • The Management Office 704-377-5648 • Fax 704-333-6927 • Christine@themanagementoffice.com Advertising Christine Irwin, CMP • The Management Office • 704-377-5648 Design Kistin Creative Studio • 704-724-9188 • kistincreative.com MPI-CC Web Site: www.mpi.org/carolinas

Work has never looked so

Plan your next event at our newly renovated facility and you’ll find all the amenities you need for a new way of doing business.

ADVERTISING RATES AND DEADLINES AD SIZE FREQUENCY MEMBER RATE Quarter Page 1X $220 (3 1/2”W x 4 3/4”H) 3X $200/issue 6X $160/issue Half Page Horizontal 1X $420 (7 1/4”W x 4 3/4”H) 3X $400/issue 6X $360/issue Half Page Vertical 1X $420 (3 1/2”W x 9 1/2”H) 3X $400/issue 6X $360/issue Full Page 1X $640 (8 1/2”W x 11”H) 3X $620/issue 6X $580/issue Full Page Insert 1X $700/issue 3X $680/issue 6X $640/issue (Produced and provided by advertiser)

NON-MEMBER RATE $290 $270/issue $230/issue $550 $530/issue $490/issue $550 $530/issue $490/issue $840 $820/issue $780/issue $910/issue $890/issue $850/issue

There are four issues of the Carolina Blitz published yearly.

January, March, June, and September NOTE: Rates are published as of January 2011, and are subject to change without notice. All published rates are net non-commissionable. Any cost incurred by the BLITZ for art that is not fully press ready (e.g. reductions, halftones) will be billed to the advertiser, or art that is not press ready may be refused.

DUE DATE: Due by the 15th of the month prior to publication. Artwork is due to the publisher within 10 days after deadline for space reservations.

203 S Front Street New Bern, NC (252) 637-1551 www.RiverfrontConventionCenter.com 2 | Carolina Blitz | Fall 2022

SEND MATERIALS TO: Christine Irwin, CMP, The Management Office, 1307 West Morehead St, Suite 207, Charlotte, NC 28208 Christine@TheManagementOffice.com • Fax: 704-333-6927 For more advertising information contact Christine Irwin, CMP, at Christine@TheManagementOffice.com or 704-377-5648 Visit our website at www.mpi.org/carolinas for additional advertising and sponsorship opportunities!

THANK YOU

TO OUR ANNUAL SPONSORS We Appreciate Your Support!

Platinum Sponsors

Diamond Sponsors

Gold Sponsors

Silver Sponsors

Convention Center & Visitors Bureau

Carolina Blitz | Fall 2022 | 3

Our Latest Expansion

is a Work of Art

Centrally located in North Carolina, Winston-Salem is a welcoming meeting destination with a history committed to reinvention and innovation. Named one of the South’s Best Cities on the Rise by Southern Living, Winston-Salem boasts the recently expanded 150,000-square-foot Benton Convention Center in the heart of our vibrant, walkable downtown. Elevate your next event in Benton South’s reimagined meeting space featuring the 24,000-square-foot Gallery Ballroom. Winston-Salem will have you looking forward to playing, meeting, and staying in our hip and historic city.

5,300 HOTEL ROOMS

100+ DOWNTOWN

UP TO $3,000 IN

1, 200 Downtown

Restaurants & Shops

Meeting Incentives

Create your next meeting masterpiece at VisitWinstonSalem.com 4 | Carolina Blitz | Fall 2022

President’s Message Building Trust in Changing Times

Brandon Crumpton Key Signature Entertainment MPI-CC President

I sincerely thank you for accepting me as your new president. So far you have heard me speak about how our chapter and its members are resilient and know how to move forward. At the July meeting I shared that my focus this year is on you our members and what direction our chapter needs to start heading in to meet the needs of meeting and event professionals in a post-COVID world. I’m sure you’ve already noticed a few changes this year. We’re going from six meetings a year to four. We’re going to try a one-day meeting in October. These are necessary changes we need to try to help keep our chapter together structurally and financially. What I mean by this is that members are looking for something different now.

We are also still slowly and successfully pulling ourselves out of the financial setback that 2020 created for our chapter. What that all means is that we have to start thinking differently. It’s very easy to just set back into our old ways, but growth will be hindered by this. Growth comes from being uncomfortable, and I’m sure you’ve all heard this before. Our natural instinct is to stick with what we know, but that may not be what takes us to the next stage of evolution in our chapter or industry. It’s also ok to step aside and let others lead. I definitely do not have all of the answers, so I put trust and support in our board of directors to make the decisions for our meetings and chapter. I also know and accept that we won’t get everything right and that is ok. We’re going to try a few things and see what works. It’s all about learning and processing what you, our members, need from us. I’m just asking for you all to be a little ok with a few changes just to see where it takes us. Also, to remind myself and each other that being uncomfortable during change is a good thing.

We are going to do our best to keep our members up-to-date with what the chapter is working on. We’re going to receive your feedback and adjust accordingly. We’re going to invite you to participate in this journey of experiments and change. We’re going to show the same care for our chapter as previous leaders and boards. We’re going to need your support and trust that we are all working in your best interest.

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Our Members

Deanna Haines (ISC)2 deanna0319@gmail.com Krystle Hammac University of North Carolina, Charlotte khammac@uncc.edu

Welcome New Members!

Membership Engagement would like to welcome all of our new members who have joined us recently. Please plug in to the chapter, volunteer and engage! We welcome your questions and will connect you with an ambassador once you have registered for your first meeting. However, if you would like an ambassador before you attend your first meeting, just let us know. We are here to help and make sure you are right where you would like to be with your membership!

Please reach out to Rachel Whitten, Vice President of Membership Engagement at RWhitten@greenvillenc.gov. We look forward to hearing from you and meeting you soon!

Please welcome the following new members from the March 1, 2022 – August 31, 2022 period.

Lola Balulis Jones, CMP Wild Dunes Resort lola.jones@ destinationhotels.com Felicia Anderson felicia.m.anderson@ knights.ucf.edu Fernanda Araujo Relias fernandaccaraujo@gmail.com Robin Bridgers Hilton Head/Bluffton Chamber of Commerce rbridgers@hiltonheadisland.org Richard Brooks Renaissance Asheville Downtown Hotel richard.brooks@ windsorhospitality.com Katie Brown Pinehurst Resort & Country Club katie.brown@pinehurst.com Amy Bruns, CMP, HMCC Conference Navigators abruns@triad.rr.com

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Meredith Carli Ensemble IQ meredith.carli@gmail.com Melinda Cole Greensboro-High Point Marriott Airport melinda.cole@marriott.com Anthie Constantinidis, CMP Pinehurst Resort & Country Club anthie.constantinidis@ pinehurst.com Sandra DeCastro sdecastro@1edtech.org Laurie Dolan JW Marriott Desert Ridge Resort & Spa Laurie.Dolan@ marriott.com Lizzie Fletcher The American Board of Anesthesiology, Inc. lizzie.fletcher@theaba.org

Laura Jackson Pinehurst Resort & Country Club laura.jackson@pinehurst.com Casey James The Beaufort Inn events@beaufortinn.com Katie Kathman Steak 48 katie@steak48.com Kristen Kelley Pinehurst Resort & Country Club kristen.kelley@pinehurst.com

Brenda France Kingston Plantation, A Hilton & Embassy Suites Resort brenda.france@hilton.com Meghan Gamble Charlotte Regional Visitors Authority meghan.gamble@crva.com Ashley Gehringer Marriott at Research Triangle Park ashley.gehringer@ marriott.com Christopher Giles J Street Productions cgiles@jstreetproductions.com

Jessica Kern Great Wolf Resorts, Inc. jkern@greatwolf.com Kristina Kijanka kristina.kijanka@ omnihotels.com Arieana Koonce Parker Poe Adams & Bernstein arieanakoonce@parkerpoe.com Amanda Law Lenovo alaw1@lenovo.com Ronald Leedy Aloft Raleigh Durham Airport/ Brier Creek a Narsi Hotel ron.leedy@narsi.com

Margo Ginsberg Duke University margo.ginsberg@duke.edu

Christine McCullough Pinehurst Resort & Country Club christine.mccullough@ pinehurst.com

Teresa Goins Guilford Technical Community College stlockleargoins@gtcc.edu

Lauren McKendrie, MTA WBL Foundation ljoyner329@yahoo.com DeAna Miller Experian Deana.miller@experian.com

Karen Miller Miller Marketing Communications, Inc. kemiller@mmciglobal.com

Lena Sanok Hampton Inn & Suites Charlotte/ SouthPark at Phillips Place lena.sanok@hilton.com

Asyia Mitchell amitchell@aligntech.com

Ivanna Simmons apexanalytix isimmons@apexanalytix.com

Ayshen Montiel Twin City Quarter ayshen.montiel@ twincityquarter.com Avery Myrick Pinehurst Resort & Country Club avery.myrick@pinehurst.com Nate Nicholson Millstone Event Services nate@millstoneevents.net

20 Years

LaTosha Smith Durham Bulls Baseball Club lsmith8@lenovo.com

Theresa Vance Ashworth College thressav@yahoo.com

Jessica Roberts, TMP Mt. Airy Tourism Jroberts@visitmayberry.com

Kimberly Vaquilar Bledsoe NCSU Poole College of Management kbledsoe07@gmail.com

Denise Ryan, CSP, MBA FireStar Speaking deniseryan@firestarspeaking.com

25 Years

Sally Slater, CASE Visit Fayetteville sslater@visitfayettevillenc.com

LaTonya Richardson UUA lrichardson@uua.org

Brittany Ruebesam Raleigh Marriott Crabtree Valley Hotel brittany.ruebesam@ marriott.com

Peggy Anderson, CMP Anderson & Company

Ava Pope

Anne Strickland YCC anne@teamycc.com

Alyssa Romano Graylyn International Conference Center aromano@graylyn.com

30 Years

Kaycee Sinclair HPN Global kayceesinclairmason@gmail.com

Laura Payne, CMP laura.payne1969@gmail.com

Star Robertson DoubleTree by Hilton Asheville Downtown star.robertson@ parkshotels.com

Anniversaries

Greensboro Area Convention & Visitors Bureau

Molly Johnson, CMP-Fellow Wilmington & Beaches CVB Tarshi McCoy, CMP, CHSP, TMP New Bern Riverfront Convention Center Erin Mellen Charleston Convention & Group Services, Inc. Randy Smith, CMP Visit Charlotte

15 Years Krista Bartlett Omni Hotels & Resorts Yolanda Hamer, CMP BCD M&E Onsite at Cisco Systems

Kristin Walker Elon University kwalker19@elon.edu

10 Years

Kendyl Warren Hickory Metro Convention & Visitors Bureau kendyl@hickorymetro.com

5 Years

Cheryl Williams (ISC)2 chwilliams@isc2.org Melisa Wolfe Marriott Marquis San Diego Marina melisa.wolfe@marriott.com

Jeanette Blackman Greenville Convention Center

Shannon Groff Discover Durham Naomi Love, CMM, CED Stanford University Sarah Nardi, CMP NC REALTORS® Debora Perlini, CMP BASF Corporation Donna Socola BASF Corporation

Rachel Whitten Visit Greenville NC VP of Member Engagement

Jamie Walker, CMP, IOM North Carolina Rural Water Association

Carolina Blitz | Fall 2022 | 7

Monthly Meeting Planner October 12, 2022 Virtual New Member Lunch’n Learn

March 15, 2023 Virtual New Member Lunch’n Learn

October 27-28, 2022 Fall 2022 Chapter Meeting Drive Shack Raleigh, NC

March 29-30, 2023 Global Meetings Industry Day and MPI-CC Tradeshow Charlotte, NC Venue coming soon!

December 9, 2022 DEI Coffee Chat Raleigh, NC Venue coming soon!

January 18, 2023 Virtual New Member Lunch’n Learn

Reminder: Deadline for submissions for the next Carolina Blitz is Friday, December 16, 2022. Please submit any articles or photographs to be considered for publication to Editor-In-Chief Cathy Mauldin, CMP, at cathymauldin@gmail.com.

Photo by 2hmedia on unsplash

February 5-6, 2023 Annual Meeting Hilton Myrtle Beach Myrtle Beach, SC

June 1, 2023 Awards Gala and Board Installation The Stockroom at 230 Raleigh, NC

8 | Carolina Blitz | Fall 2022

MPI-CC 2022-2023 Board of Directors and Committees Leadership

President Brandon Crumpton Key Signature Entertainment brandon@keysignatureonline.com

President-Elect Najauna White, CMP, CDE Miles Partnership Najauna.white@gmail.com

Immediate Past President Ricardo Hicks Tech Factory Productions rhicks@techfactoryproductions.com

Leadership & Volunteer Development Chair Alyce Kelly, CHSP The Beaufort Hotel Alyce.Kelly@concordhotels.com

Director of Diversity, Equity & Inclusion Mitch Savoie Hill, CPC SavHill Consulting LLC Mitch@savhillconsulting.com

Awards Committee Chair Molly Johnson, CMP Wilmington & Beaches CVB mjohnson@ wilmingtonandbeaches.com Chapter Administrator Christine Irwin, CMP The Management Office Christine@ themanagementoffice.com

Communications VP of Marketing and Communications Nicole Filippo, CMP Elon University nfilippo@elon.edu

Publications Committee Chair Cathy Mauldin, CMP DESA, Inc. Onsite at CDM Smith cathymauldin@gmail.com

Social Media Committee Chair Melanie Mason, CMP Melanie.mason35@gmail.com

Education Committee Lena Sanok Hampton Inn and Suites Charlotte/SouthPark at Phillips Place Lena.Sanok@Hilton.com

Professional Certifications Committee Co-Chair Jessica Garrett, CMP Cisco jegarret@cisco.com

Education VP of Program Development Cathy Carpenter Visit Mooresville cathy@visitmooresville.com

Professional Certifications Committee Co-Chair Tessa Barrier, CMP MHI TBarrier@mhi.org

Finance VP of Finance Seth Macchi Live Events Media Group (LEMG) seth.m@lemg.live

Tradeshow Committee Chair Chair Needed

Auction Committee Nicole Keshler Visit Raleigh Nkeshler@visitraleigh.com

Member Engagement VP of Member Engagement Rachel Whitten Visit Greenville NC RWhitten@greenvillenc.gov

Chapter Ambassadors CVB Connect Planner Connect Due to Renew Volunteer Cancellations Volunteer

Carolina Blitz | Fall 2022 | 9

Meet over cocktails ...or spreadsheets.

YOU’RE WELCOME.

more than just Meetings Connect. Collaborate. Cultivate.

You’re welcome to work hard and play hard in Greensboro.

VISITGREENSBORONC.COM

Sarah Davis Jones, CMP, TMP Director of Sales & Marketing Sarah@hickorymetro.com 828.322.1335 VisitHickoryMetro.com

@visithickorymetro

Meet at a spot that has been launching businesses for more than 300 years.

While our hotel may be new, our location has been a hub for thriving businesses for as long as we can remember. Originally a fishing ground for American Indians, it became a center for the Menhaden fishing industry after the Civil War. Today, our site continues to inspire business with expansive waterfront views, natural light, luxurious accommodations and tempting cuisine. Stimulate your business at Beaufort Hotel.

Where your Outer Banks adventure begins.

2440 Lennoxville Road | Beaufort, NC 28516 | (252) 728-3000 | BeaufortHoteINC.com

10 | Carolina Blitz | Fall 2022

Meet the Member Jenna Light | Parks Hospitality Group Where do you currently work and how long have you been there?

I currently work for Parks Hospitality Group as an Area Group Sales Manager, servicing four Hilton hotels in the Raleigh-Cary area - Hilton Garden Inn Raleigh-Cary, DoubleTree by Hilton Raleigh-Cary, Homewood Suites by Hilton Raleigh-Cary I-40 and the TRU by Hilton RaleighDurham Airport. My 4-year anniversary is this October!

I can’t believe it.

Tell me about your position and the organization you are with.

With my position, I manage all incoming corporate and (Social, Military, Educational, Religious, and Fraternal) SMERF group leads. I started with Parks Hospitality Group four years ago as Sales Coordinator and have been promoted twice since then, now taking on the role as Area Group Sales Manager. Parks Hospitality Group is an award-winning hotel development and management company based in Raleigh, NC. My favorite thing about Parks is that it is a smaller company, with a corporate team that truly cares about their property level team members. After their support for the past two trying years during COVID, I couldn’t be more confident in being a part of this company.

What are your hobbies?

Why did you join MPI Carolinas Chapter?

I joined MPI in hopes of enhancing my network, learning to be a better leader and giving back to the industry that I love! Everyone could not have been more welcoming! I look forward to continuing to grow in the organization.

What advice would you give someone interested in pursuing a career in our industry?

I would say to absolutely go for it! I feel so lucky to have chosen this path and to be a part of this industry. My biggest piece of advice to people in the hospitality industry is to always go the extra mile. Finding a way to “wow” a customer is so rewarding.

What is your ideal vacation/vacation spot?

Somewhere tropical! My favorite local beach town is Salter Path, NC. My family has been visiting there since before I was born. It feels like a second home.

Finding a way to “wow” a customer is so rewarding.

Going to the beach, hanging out with my 8-year-old Black Lab named Remy and exploring local new food spots.

Rachel Whitten Visit Greenville NC VP of Member Engagement

Carolina Blitz | Fall 2022 | 11

Look Who We Spotted

12 | Carolina Blitz | Fall 2022

at the May and July Meetings

Photos by IWP Photography Carolina Blitz | Fall 2022 | 13

Calling All Writers!

Do you dream of being a published author?

If so, the Blitz is looking for you! While we’re not the Wall Street Journal, getting published in the Blitz is a great way to share your ideas with fellow MPI-CC members and earn points toward your CMP certification. The Blitz is always accepting original articles and great topic ideas. To submit your articles or ideas, CathyMauldin@gmail.com or submit via our website at www.mpi.org/carolinas.

Volunteers are the heart of our organization.

Help make a difference in our chapter and shape its future. Volunteering on a committee is a great way to elevate your membership, engage with fellow planners and suppliers, develop your leadership skills, and learn new professional skills.

Following a $200M modernization, Memphis’ Renasant Convention Center is open and ready to host your group for boutique, affordable meetings featuring flexible space, natural light and Mississippi River views ... all in the legendary home of blues, soul and rock ‘n’ roll.

Following a $200M modernization, Memphis’ R E N A SA N TC O N V E N T I O N C E N T E R .C O M

Renasant Convention Center is open and ready to Following $200M modernization, Memphis’ host your agroup for boutique, affordable meetings

Renasant Center is open to featuring Convention flexible space, natural lightand andready Mississippi host your group boutique, affordable River views ... allfor in the legendary home ofmeetings blues,

BEST CUSTOMER SERVICE & ON-SITE SUPPORT

featuring flexible space, natural light and Mississippi soul and rock ‘n’ roll.

River views ... all in the legendary home of blues, soul and rock ‘n’ roll.

R E N A SA N TC O N V E N T I O N C E N T E R .C O M

E XH I B ITOR MAGAZ I N E , 2022

R E N A SA N TC O N V E N T I O N C E N T E R .C O M

14 | Carolina Blitz | Fall 2022

BEST CUSTOMER SERVICE & ON-SITE SUPPORT BEST CUSTOMER SERVICE

E XH I B ITOR MAGAZ I N E , 2022

Visit mpi.org/Carolinas or email Rachel Whitten, Leadership & Volunteer Development Chair, at RWhitten@greenvillenc.gov for more information on getting involved.

Photo by monstera on pexels

please contact Cathy Mauldin, CMP, at

Meet the New Kingston LEG ENDARY

M EETINGS

AHE AD

After a $65 million update, Kingston Resorts, located along Myrtle Beach’s beautiful Grand Strand, has taken meetings to the next level. Hilton Myrtle Beach Resort, the luxurious 387-room oceanfront destination, and Embassy Suites by Hilton, with 255 oceanfront suites, propel Kingston’s legacy as the premier beach destination. Enjoy stunning new dining spaces, Seaside Vista event space and Black Drum Brewing. Relax at oceanfront pools, Currents Waterpark, Spa33 and 78Fitness. Kingston Resorts offers 100,000+ SF of meeting space and an award-winning event team that delivers exceptional experiences for groups from 10 to 2,000. Myrtle Beach. Only Better.

843.449.5000 | KingstonResorts.com MYRTLE BEACH, SC

Carolina Blitz | Fall 2022 | 15

TRANQUILITY MEET S

Morning Commute

THERE’S MORE TO US

JOHN POOLE 704.456.7968 • johnpoole@explorecabarrus.com

ExploreCabarrus.com

Meet in a place where even a trip to the office becomes an unforgettable journey. Find your path at Kiawah Island Golf Resort.

844.958.0670 MeetatKiawah.com

16 | Carolina Blitz | Fall 2022

SOUTH CAROLINA

Welcome The Gastonia Conference Center, located in the revitalized downtown and adjacent to the boutique Esquire Hotel, is a state-of-the-art facility providing 30,000 square feet of tech-savvy space accommodating groups of up to 450 and located only minutes from the Charlotte Douglas International Airport.

GoGastonNC.org

CONGRATULATIONS to the MPI-CC Annual Award Winners The 2022 MPI Carolinas Chapter Annual Awards were presented during the chapter’s May meeting at Harrah’s Cherokee Casino Resort. The 2020 annual awards were also presented at this meeting since the 2020 annual meeting was canceled due to the pandemic.

Planner of the Year Cathy Mauldin, CMP (CDM Smith) DESA, Inc.

President’s Award Cathy Mauldin, CMP (CDM Smith) DESA, Inc.

Corey D Bizzell Award of Excellence Rachel Whitten, CMP Visit Greenville NC

Tomorrow’s Leader Rachel Whitten, CMP Visit Greenville NC

Supplier of the Year Tarshi McCoy, CMP, CHSP, TMP New Bern Riverfront Convention Center

Hall of Fame Nicole Keshler Visit Raleigh

Volunteer of the Year Melanie Mason, CMP EnsembleIQ

Chapter Event of the Year Marriott Raleigh Crabtree Valley September 2021 Chapter Meeting

Nicole Filippo, CMP Elon University VP of Marketing and Communications

Carolina Blitz | Fall 2022 | 17

DISSOLVING

Mitch Savoie Hill, CPC SavHill Consulting, LLC (Based on her TEDx Talk, “Which Box Do I Check?)

18 | Carolina Blitz | Fall 2022

Photo by Mae Mu on unsplash

Our Limiting Boxes

Boxes. We put people and ourselves in limiting boxes every day or try to. These boxes act as shortcuts to thinking or digging deep and getting to know the people around us, our teams, clients, etc., thus creating a spirit of separation and non-inclusion.

They say that people will have a solid impression of who you are within the first seven seconds of meeting.

Seven Seconds!

had heard it before - if you spoke Spanish, you were labeled “Spanish.” It is akin to labeling an English-speaking person “British.”

But did you know that a more recent series of experiments

by Princeton psychologists revealed that all it takes is a tenth of a second to form an impression of a stranger from their face? A tenth of a second?!

My colleague came to me as her first point of reference because I was one of the only servers at the restaurant who spoke Spanish. How could a “Spanish” person not know who Selena was? Didn’t I listen to that kind of music?

So that means that you see my face, and within a tenth of a second, you have told yourself a story about me, about who I am.

The assumption that I would be able to comment on Selena was incredibly annoying. It hit a nerve in me that had been pulsing for years. I was just as American as she was! I was born in the USA, brought up with MTV and American radio.

I played Led Zeppelin and Guns N’ Roses on my guitar. A Metallica poster hung on my wall.

As a leadership coach, of course, I encourage my executive clients to be aware of how they are showing up, putting their very best faces forward. I understand how image affects business. I don’t make the rules, but I will certainly help my clients succeed within those rules.

But what about the assumptions people make based on things you can’t control, such as your race, gender, body type, physical ability challenges, or where you are from?

I remember the day the Latin pop star Selena died. I was working as a waitress at a theme restaurant in NYC. I wore Levi’s 501 blue jeans and t-shirts as my uniform—very rock ‘n’ roll. Rock ‘n’ roll was what I was all about.

The day Selena died, a fellow waitress approached me, “Did you hear about Selena? What do you think?” She was eager for my commentary.

My response shocked her, “Who is Selena?”

I had never heard of her. I did not immerse myself in the daily news, a survival habit I adopted early in life.

The red-headed waitress looked at me in shock and disbelief.

“Selena! The Spanish pop star?”

Ahhh, Spanish- a very common and erroneous label. Selena was Mexican American, not Spanish. Oh, I’m sure there were Spanish roots in her family history, but she was not from Spain. She didn’t even speak Spanish until she was prompted to do so for the purpose of her music career. I

I was nineteen and reeling in my own cultural crisis. Why couldn’t I just be American like everyone else who grew up like me? Well, because the truth was that they did not grow up like me – in Little Havana, Miami – almost a country of its own. Even in Little Havana, being white was considered being “Americana.”

When I was a teenager listening to rock music and watching TV, the women celebrated in music videos were blonde with

How many times in a day do you find yourself making snap judgments, putting someone in a box, ignoring that there is a whole story to each person that we do not know unless we dig deeper?

Carolina Blitz | Fall 2022 | 19

How To Have An Uncomfortable Conversation

long feathery hair and skinny hips. Even the Telemundo soap opera stars looked like this. Women who looked like me were considered ugly. At least that is the message that was constantly piped through the media and even in my family. My great-grandmother was black – Afro-Cuban. I inherited her curly hair and voluptuous hips. As a child, I was told those things were curses; my curly hair was referred to as “Pelo malo” (bad hair).

I felt ugly. I felt that my Afro-Cuban roots were considered inferior. Furthermore, I was not able to easily identify with any one thing – not Black, not totally White, not really Cuban, and not American enough.

Many of my clients ask, “But how do you have an uncomfortable conversation?”

Here is how: 1. With grace 2. With genuine interest and attention 3. With the intention of learning something new 4. With the use of openended, non-threatening questions 5. With a childlike curiosity and wonder It sometimes takes a lot of coaching, but it can be done successfully if you know those basic steps. If you are asking the right questions and focusing on the person in front of you, their experiences, likes, and dislikes, you will then start to truly understand that you cannot put anyone in a box and therefore stop offering “boxed” solutions or services.

20 | Carolina Blitz | Fall 2022

How many times in a day do you find yourself making snap judgments, putting someone in a box, ignoring that there is a whole story to each person that we do not know unless we dig deeper?

Have you ever felt boxed in by one of these many things you can’t control?

We all have at one point or another.

To this day, I hate filling out government paperwork where they ask, am I: Black, White, Hispanic, and one added recently – White (Non-Hispanic) – Why do they have to call that one out specifically? I don’t see Black (Non-Hispanic).

What if, like many first-generation Americans born of immigrant parents, I am all of those and none of those?

In life, this boxed mentality is the basis of teams not cooperating well, miscommunications, failed expectations, failed businesses, and in the worst-case scenario, war.

In hospitality and meeting planning, understanding the stories behind the people you serve is the basis of successful execution of stellar service. We must understand our client’s needs, wants, and intricate backgrounds to provide an exceptional experience. That is how we stand apart.

But how? How do we ask deep and sometimes uncomfortable questions to get to know the person in front of us?

How do we expand our limited views due to our conscious or unconscious biases (and we ALL have them)?

That is a great question and a great place to start.

When I coach leaders and teams on engaging their clients and teammates, I spend some time first getting them

to understand the basics of genuine engagement – being present, connecting, and communicating. It is the only way to truly enter into a discussion and to have deep, if uncomfortable, conversations that lead to expanding our cultural and emotional intelligence.

Debate vs. Discussion When I facilitate DEI roundtables and “real talks,” I begin by clarifying the importance of being willing to have a beginner’s mind, ready to be vulnerable and to have a discussion, not a debate. A debate is Win/Lose, while a discussion is Win/Win.

The point is that there is no easy, quick-fix route to understanding the people around you, in your team, or on your client list.

You have to take the time and have those deep conversations.

Labels One way we put someone in a box is by labeling them, tokenizing them. It is another shortcut to doing the more profound work.

I once had a colleague ask me, “Well then, what is the best way to approach you to ask for the Latina’s perspective?”

To which I replied: “Well, you can’t. You see, you won’t get the Latina’s perspective from me. You will only get Mitch’s perspective.”

My perspective may or may not be similar to other firstgeneration Latinas like me, but I am ME, complete with my own unique experiences, education, adversities, likes, and dislikes. You cannot put a label on me and expect me to speak for a whole group. I can only speak for myself. If you want to see if there is a shared perspective, you can talk to many Latinas, watch movies directed by Latinas, and read some books authored by Latinas. Maybe then you will start to see the similarities. Most people don’t want to do that much work. It is easier to go for the quick answer.

The point is that there is no easy, quick-fix route to understanding the people around you, in your team, or on your client list.

You have to take the time and have those deep conversations.

If you feel unclear, ask more questions – go deeper. The more questions you ask, the more you will learn. This understanding will lead you to develop great ideas and creative solutions.

I was having a conversation about this very subject with a diverse group of friends during a Game Night. The White American male in the group asked, “Why do we have to have all these specific labels anyway?

Why can’t we just treat everyone with respect?”

I said, “Hey! That’s exactly what my TEDx Talk is about!”

To which he replied, apathetically, “It doesn’t matter.

People just won’t learn. How do you even get them to listen?”

I looked at my good friend tenderly and said, “That’s a great question! The answer is by continuing to engage in conversations like this among diverse friends, family, and corporate settings.”

Perhaps I am an optimist. I am also a coach who has seen the positive effects of good coaching and deep, facilitated conversations. I know it is happening. Plenty of people are listening and are willing to learn.

The boxes will only dissolve when people can see beyond the labels and understand the bigger story. Keep telling your stories. Keep educating those who are open to learning. Keep asking deep questions and expanding your cultural and emotional intelligence. The results will be invaluable!

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Nominate a Member Volunteer Do You Know a Volunteer of the Quarter?

We have so many active members who deserve recognition for their efforts! If you know of someone who is going above and beyond, share their name and volunteer accomplishments with us so we can give them a shout out. This person can be a committee chair or member or even a brand new MPI-CC member who has already started to shine. The Volunteer of the Quarter Award is given Please send your nomination to Molly Johnson, CMP at mjohnson@wilmingtonandbeaches.com.

Wonderfully eclectic meeting spaces served with a side of fun

Cathy Carpenter, Director of Sales | 980-447-0666 | cathy@visitmooresville.com 22 | Carolina Blitz | Fall 2022

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four times a year and nominations are accepted all the time!

SPACES DESIGNED TO MAKE AN IMPACT

CaesarsMeansBusiness.com | 855-633-8238

Carolina Blitz | Fall 2022 | 23

24 | Carolina Blitz | Fall 2022