Keys Woman - Fall/Winter 22

OMAN KEYS W FOR KEYS WOMEN BY KEYS WOMEN

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UNDER 40 WOMEN TO WATCH

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KEYS WEEKLY | VOLUME 4 | NO 6 | FALL/WINTER 2022

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To another installment of Keys Woman. We’re glad you’re here, all of you, of all ages, Boomers to Zoomers and everyone in between.

In this, our Generations issue, we wanted to highlight the differences among us, as well as the threads that bind us all together as women. Perhaps a little more togetherness and cohesion wouldn’t be a bad thing in light of today’s divided society.

It’s easy for some of the younger among us to roll their eyes and toss a dismissive, “OK, Boomer,” over the shoulder as they huff away and return their attention to the phone. And it’s equally easy for the older generations to shake their heads in disapproval and mutter, “Damn coddled millennials,” at the kid with blue hair, earbuds and a phone-bent neck.

But that’s not productive. We as women are better than that. There’s enough animosity and dismissiveness in this country today. Let’s not let the generation gap further divide us. If ever there was a time and a need for strength and unity among women, it is now.

In this issue, Erin Stover Sickmen attempts to start a conversation, not an argument, about the overturning of Roe v.

Wade and its implications.

And in case you’ve never been sure where you fall in terms of generational identity — Boomer, Gen X, Millennial or Gen Z, we’ve sorted that out for you as well, with a rundown of some of the events and traits that define each generation.

As usual, we’ve spotlighted three (OK, four) wildly impressive women to watch, all of them under 40. We have a dentist from Puerto Rico, a political lobbyist, a digital strategist and a real estate pro who’s constantly on the run.

Chris McNulty brings us an astrological look at the Chiron’s place and role in our lives, and Alex Rickert brings us a hilarious take on a company retreat that got a little out of hand last month.

Creative Director Stephanie Mitchell compiled this issue’s playlist, providing a soundtrack of songs from women throughout the decades. Our in-house fitness expert and social media strategist Maison Benitez offers tips for starting the day with a positive outlook, and Annie Briening, COO of our sister company, Overseas Media Group, details the attraction and marketing potential of Instagram walls, which are popping up throughout the Florida Keys.

Settle in with this issue and join us as we celebrate our strengths together.

— Mandy Miles

4 | Keys Woman

IN-STOCK INVENTORY • IMMEDIATE DELIVERY

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Women leading the Keys for over 6 decades. www.KeysRealEstate.com © 2022 BHH Affiliates, LLC. An independently owned and operated franchisee of BHH Affiliates, LLC. Berkshire Hathaway HomeServices and the Berkshire Hathaway HomeServices symbol are registered service marks of Columbia Insurance Company, a Berkshire Hathaway affiliate. Equal Housing Opportunity.

WHO WE ARE Publisher Britt Myers britt@keysweekly.com Managing Partner Jason Koler jason@keysweekly.com Creative Director Stephanie Mitchell stephanie@keysweekly.com Art/Design Irene de Bruijn irene@keysweekly.com Editor Mandy Miles mandy@keysweekly.com Director of Sales Manuela Carrillo Mobley manuela@keysweekly.com Account Executives Stephanie Mitchell stephanie@keysweekly.com Patti Childress patti@keysweekly.com Jill Miranda Baker jill@keysweekly.com Staff Writers Jim McCarthy jim@keysweekly.com Alex Rickert alex@keysweekly.com Production Manager Anneke Patterson anneke@keysweekly.com Art/Design Javier Reyes javier@keysweekly.com Travis Cready travis@keysweekly.com Executive Administrator Char Hruska char@keysweekly.com Contributors Maison Benitez, Annie Briening, Kirby Myers, Christopher McNulty, Karen Newfield, Erin Stover Sickmen.

Published MMXXII Key West 5450 MacDonald Ave. No. 5 Key West, FL 33040 305-453-6928 Marathon 9709 Overseas Hwy. Marathon, FL 33050 305-743-0844 Upper Keys 91760 Overseas Hwy. Tavernier, FL 33070 305-363-2957

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04

LETTER from the editor ........................

08

ON THE DANCE FLOOR Dance your way through the decades .....................

12

GEN WHAT? Generations explained, finally .....................

16

DIGITAL MEMORIES So that’s what an Insta wall is ........................

20

SWEATER WEATHER Cozy fall recipes

24

THAT EXPLAINS IT A deep dive into your birth sign ........................

28

HIT YOUR RESET BUTTON Take time to check in with YOU ........................

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CLASSIC READS Some things never change, or do they? ........................

34

FIERCE. FABULOUS. And under 40 ........................

44

1973 A conversation starter ........................

48

WOULD YOU RATHER? Getting to know you better .......................

50

FASHION’S FIT PROBLEM Who cares what the tag says ........................

52

HAVE THE TALK Topics to cover before you take the leap ........................ fall/winter 2022 | 7

YOUNG OR OLD, DANCING HAS NO AGE LIMIT

Welcome to the soundtrack for our “Generations” issue of Keys Woman.

As we were brainstorming ideas for this Fall/Winter edition, we kept coming back to the same thread — women of all different ages and backgrounds who have made unmistakable impressions on all of us. The 20-something hype girl in the office never lets you talk down to yourself.

The 46-year-old is comfortable with and confident in her middle-aged self. Then there’s the older, wiser women in our world — moms, aunts, grandmothers — whose timeless advice has inevitably proven true, despite our repeated attempts to ignore it in our younger years. These women comprise our own “greatest hits” collection.

Our playlist reflects these influences, featuring classic favorites and contemporary hits by women whose voices have pumped us up and put our broken hearts back together.

We all have a voice inside screaming at the top of her lungs, reminding us, every day, just how amazing we really are. Let’s stop muting that voice. Let that woman loose as we peruse these songs and stories. Dance around the kitchen and get your groove on with us.

Cheers to all the fierce, fabulous women who make us proud to be female every damn day.

Keys Weekly women’s playlist

8 | Keys Woman

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BY MANDY MILES

BACK IN MY Millennials are turning 40? When did that happen? When did the generation that got participation trophies, and not chicken pox become real adults? More importantly, which young people are the older generations supposed to complain about these days? Have you ever noticed that life was always tougher, “back in my day?” And that “kids today” always have it easy, in the eyes of anyone older?

The Greatest Generation, Baby Boomers, Generation X, Millennial and Gen Z. Our generational identity is as much a part of us as our zodiac sign. I’m a proud Gen X’er as surely as I am a Taurus. The named generations — birth years, time spans, current ages and defining characteristics — it all sounds so official, like something we would’ve highlighted in a textbook to memorize for a test. “ Baby Boomers: ‘46 to ‘64, Gen X: ‘65 to ‘80….” and so on.

But that’s not the case, not at all.

There’s really no definitive separation between the generations. Experts emphasize that the divisions are blurred and there’s plenty of overlap.

No one stamped “Gen X” on my birth certificate back in 1976. We’re not issued membership cards for our own generation.

Rather, these trends and timelines are evaluated and assigned in hindsight, once sociologists step back a bit and view us all

12 | Keys Woman

with a more wide-angle lens in relation to global events, political priorities, economics and other influences.

But who decides when a new generation begins? What are the main differences among Baby Boomers, Gen Xers, Millennials and Gen Z? And who decides what to call us? (By the way, the name Gen X had nothing to do with our predilection for club drugs.)

The term “The Greatest Generation,” applied to those who fought in World War II, didn’t come into use until 1998, when Tom Brokaw wrote a book about them and called it “The Greatest Generation.”

The emergence of the term Baby Boomers was more clearly data-driven given the quantifiable spike in births following World War II. And my fellow Gen Xers apparently can thank Canadian writer Douglas Coupland for our label. He was born at the tail end of the Baby Boom in 1961 and as an older adult began chronicling the lives of the 20-somethings coming up behind him.

His 1991 book, “Generation X: Tales for an Accelerated Culture,” was seen as an accurate representation of that era’s youth, and “without knowing it, Coupland permanently named Gen X,” writes Kyle Cagle in a Forbes article. The terms Gen Y (aka Millennials) and Gen Z simply followed suit.

WE KNOW WHAT WE’RE CALLED, BUT WHAT ARE WE ALL ABOUT? THE GREATEST GENERATION: This generation’s childhood started with economic success and inventions such as the radio and telephone. Then came the Great Depression and a decade of struggle, followed by the attack on Pearl Harbor, when millions of men eagerly enlisted to fight for their country in World War II. In their absence, women rose to the occasion, supporting their country and their families by taking jobs in factories, becoming nurses and working in auxiliary miliary positions.

This generation also created post-war America — and most of the Baby Boomers who populated it.

SILENT GENERATION: The generation’s “silent” behavior has been attributed to the difficult times in which they were born, as well as their coming of age during McCarthyism. Though the Silent Generation is known for traditionalist behavior and a desire to work within the system rather than to change it, many not-so-silent and untraditional members of this generation shaped the world in significant ways, writes Robert Smith for familysearch.org.

DAY… THE GREATEST GENERATION 1901 to 1924 (currently in their late 90s and 100s) SILENT GENERATION 1925 to 1945 (currently 77 to 97 years old) BABY BOOMERS 1946 to 1964 (currently 58 to 76 years old) GEN X 1965 to 1980 (currently 42 to 57 years old) GEN Y AKA MILLENNIALS 1981 to 1996 (currently 26 to 41 years old) GEN Z 1997 to 2012 (currently 10 to 25 years old)

Note: Experts emphasize that the above time spans are not definitive cutoff points, but rather guides, with significant overlap and blurred distinctions.

BABY BOOMERS: The Boomers weren’t just a population boom, but part of one of the largest growth periods in U.S. history. They’re now mostly well into retirement age. They came of age during the Summer of Love, the Civil Rights Movement and the Vietnam War. They then turned their attention to the workplace, Wall Streets and politics. They remain a large percentage of the population, but are quickly becoming outnumbered by the younger and more tech-savvy generations.

GEN X: Among Gen X, Gen Y and Gen Z, Gen X had the most in-person fun, states a generational blog by Shutterstock. Children of the ‘80s went to record stores, movies, malls and concerts.

“Prior to the internet, when questionable decisions weren’t saved online forever, staying present wasn’t something one had to remind themselves to do,” Shutterstock states. But Gen Xers were often overshadowed by their parents, who typically are part of the much larger Baby Boomer generation.

Gen Xers more or less created the PC, networking and the infrastructure of the Internet. Gen Xers remember when cassette tapes replaced albums.

GEN Y (AKA MILLENNIALS): Gen Y grew up listening to CDs that evolved into music streaming services. Millennials largely created the World Wide Web as we know it, and the mobile web. Millennials got a taste of Gen X’s social freedom in the early 2000s, but “once Instagram hit the scene in 2010, all bets were off. Millennials became the generation that took pictures at brunch and relied on influencers to make purchase recommendations,” states Shutterstock.

Despite being highly educated in relation to previous generations, a national recession hindered the start of Generation Y’s career aspects. Generation Y is known for its tech-savviness, having grown up with much of the technology we know today.

GEN Z: ​​For Gen Z, all options are on the table, including who they love. Twenty percent of Gen Zers identify as LGBTQ, and they’re less likely than prior generations to make marriage and family their top priority.

Although Gen Z grew tired of staying home over the last two pandemic years, they’re still not as socially (or sexually) active as previous generations, states Shutterstock.

“They often rely on screen time activities like streaming services, TikTok, and online shopping to keep them entertained.”

They’re also more likely to click on a video or image than a passage of text. fall/winter 2022 | 13

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STRIKE A POSE

Olive Morada helps itself — and its online presence — by including a hashtag and the artist’s identity in its mural.

82245 Overseas Hwy., Islamorada, Mile Marker 82.

16 | Keys Woman

INSTAGRAM WALLS ARE MEMORY MAKERS — AND MARKETING TOOLS

Did you ever think that before you embark on your latest vacation or getaway you would Google, “Where are the most Instagrammable spots in…?”

Yes, Instagram Walls (mural walls, colorful walls, texture walls) are now (and have been) a thing.

When visiting a new place, finding these eclectic, beautiful backdrops can be a great way to explore different neighborhoods and the local art that makes a destination interesting. In the Florida Keys, our “neighborhoods” are a little different. We have the luxury of a 110-mile chain of islands to explore and find amazing “Instagrammable” locations created by local artists and business owners. A few stops at picturesque places along the Keys are a perfect way to break up the drive while hitting your bucket list spots in the Keys.

Now, thanks to social media, these walls not only serve as backdrops for selfies, fashion and travel photos, but are also a catalyst that can help propel a business’s digital and social media presence. Let the online influencers (and the selfie takers) do the work for you. When they pose for a photo in front of your place, they post their image online, showing your location to all their followers while pulling in likes and engagement for you. And it all happens right outside your door.

As a business owner, where should you start? First, make sure the site’s appearance reflects whatever style or vibe you want to convey to the online world.

THE VIBE: A mural or graffiti art offers a custom look.

Consider commissioning a local artist, student, gallery or arts consortium to create something that highlights your business, while offering value and aesthetics for visitors who will be snapping the photos. The best examples also connect with your community at large. #HASHTAGS: Thanks to hashtags, selfie takers can selfsort pictures from your business right from their phones. Consider including a suggested hashtag on your Instagram wall.

It will remind visitors to include it in their post, and will help future visitors find you.

LOCATION TAGS: An Instagram tag is a specific location based on latitude and longitude of where your brand physically lives. Locations are displayed at the top of every Instagram post once they’re published, right underneath the username or the brand. Location tags are another great way to sort images and posts — and to show precisely where they were taken so others can easily find the same location when they happen to visit the Florida Keys.

The Florida Keys in general and its Overseas Highway specifically offers plenty of places and walls to capture your visit and make shareable memories. Here are a few suggestions for your next frame-worthy photo op in the Keys:

The mural at Aqua Nightclub in Key West appears in countless vacation photos — so does the artist’s name and business, thanks to her social media handle.

ANNIE BRIENING/Overseas Media Group

1

2

KEY WEST • Aqua Bar & Nightclub 711 Duval St., Key West (1) • The Reach Resort 1435 Simonton St. Key West (2)

3

MARATHON • Marathon Veterinary Hospital, 5001 Overseas Hwy., MM 50 (3) • Keys Cable Park at Grassy Flats 59300 Overseas Hwy. MM 59 (4) UPPER KEYS • History of Diving Museum, 82990 Overseas Hwy., Islamorada, MM 82 (5)

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Annie Briening is COO of Overseas Media Group, a locally owned digital marketing agency. Visit OMG at overseasmediagroup.com

5

fall/winter 2022 | 17

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BY STEPHANIE MITCHELL & ANNIE BRIENING

a f l fal

Even in the Florida Keys you can feel the seasons start to change. Although we never get the extreme temperature drops the rest of the country experiences, we still enjoy the cooler months that we’ve earned after enduring the relentless humidity, powerful storms and even stronger sunshine.

That being said, pumpkins do start to appear — even in the tropics — and the cozy comfort ingredients of fall become kitchen staples. Open your windows, enjoy the cool ocean breeze and dive into these delicious dishes.

SWEET POTATO GOAT CHEESE PUFFS 2 medium sweet potatoes, peeled & chopped 1 oz. goat cheese 1 Tbsp rosemary, minced & divided 1 bundle of fresh sage, minced 1 cup parmesan cheese grated & divided 1 Tbsp milk 1 Tbsp butter 1 egg 3/4 cup breadcrumbs salt & pepper to taste honey parchment paper Directions Preheat oven to 425 degrees.

Bring a large pot of salted water to a boil, cook potatoes for 15 min. or until tender. Drain and place cooked potatoes in a large bowl.

Add goat cheese, butter, milk, 1/2 cup of parmesan, 1/2 teaspoon rosemary and salt & pepper to taste. Mash together. Refrigerate for 20 min.

Line a baking sheet with parchment paper.

In a small bowl, beat the egg.

In a shallow bowl, combine breadcrumbs, remaining parmesan cheese, remaining rosemary, salt & pepper.

Roll potato mixture into small balls (about the size of a ping pong ball.)

Coat balls in egg and transfer to breadcrumb mixture, rolling around until completely coated. Place on baking sheet.

Spritz balls with olive oil or baking spray and bake for 15 min. Turn oven to high broil and bake for 5 more minutes until golden brown and crispy.

Drizzle with honey to serve and top with minced fresh sage.

20 | Keys Woman

DIRTY CHAI ESPRESSO MARTINI Ingredients (Chai honey syrup) 1/2 cup honey 4 bags chai tea 1 teaspoon vanilla extract Ingredients (Martini) 1-2 Tbsp of Chai syrup 2 oz. vodka 1 ½ oz. Kahlúa 1 ½ oz. espresso 1 oz. canned coconut milk Grated nutmeg for garnish (optional)

Directions Make the chai honey syrup ahead and let chill.

In a medium pot, bring 1/2 cup water to a boil. Remove from heat.

Add the chai tea bags, cover and steep 10 mins.

Remove the tea bags and add the honey. Bring to a boil over high heat. Boil 3-5 mins., then remove from the heat. Stir in the vanilla.

Let cool. Makes enough for about 6 martinis.

In a cocktail shaker, combine 1-2 tablespoons chai syrup, vodka, Kahlua, espresso and coconut milk.

Add ice and shake vigorously.

Strain into the prepared glass.

Garnish with grated nutmeg.

s e it r o v a FALL FLAVOR SALAD

Ingredients (salad) 1 Tbsp olive oil 2 medium sweet potatoes, peeled and diced into 1/2-inch cubes Sea salt and freshly ground black pepper 5 oz. arugula 1 avocado, thinly sliced 1/2 cup crumbled goat cheese (or gorgonzola) 1/2 cup chopped walnuts, lightly toasted 1/3 cup dried cranberries Ingredients (dressing) 3 Tbsp olive oil 1 Tbsp lemon juice 1 teaspoon Dijon mustard 1 small clove garlic, pressed or minced 1/2 teaspoon sea salt 1/4 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper Directions Roast potatoes: Heat oven to 400°F. Spread the diced sweet potatoes on a medium baking sheet. Drizzle with olive oil, and toss until the sweet potatoes are evenly coated. Season the sweet potatoes generously with salt and pepper.

Bake for about 30 mins., or until potatoes are tender, lightly browned and the edges begin to caramelize. Remove from the oven and set aside.

Dressing: Whisk all ingredients together in a bowl until combined. Use immediately or refrigerate in a sealed container for up to 3 days.

Salad assembly: Once the sweet potatoes are ready, add them to a large serving bowl along with the arugula, avocado, goat cheese, nuts and cranberries. Drizzle with the dressing and toss until combined.

Serve immediately.

MR. MITCHELL’S BUTTERNUT SQUASH SOUP Ingredients 1 butternut squash 1 large onion 1 finely chopped carrot 2 sticks chopped celery 5 garlic cloves 1 Tbsp finely chopped ginger 1/2 stick of butter Olive oil 1 cup heavy cream 1 32 oz. container of chicken stock Canadian maple syrup Salt and pepper Fresh or dry rosemary Pumpkin seeds Directions Cut squash in half and remove seeds, then chop into cubes, brush cubes with olive oil and place on a baking sheet with parchment paper.

Bake at 350 degrees for 30 mins. or until soft.

In a medium pot over medium heat, add 1/2 of the butter (1/4 stick) plus the garlic, ginger, onions, carrots and celery. Heat for 10 mins., stirring occasionally. Add chicken stock and simmer for another 10 mins.

Add stock and squash to blender and blend until creamy and smooth.

Place mixture in pot and heat on medium for 20 mins. (May need to do it in 2 batches, 1/2 stock, 1/2 squash).

Add cream, salt and pepper to taste and heat for another 10 mins.

Ladle into bowls and drizzle with maple syrup. Garnish with a sprig of rosemary and pumpkin seeds.

fall/winter 2022 | 21

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BY CHRIS McNULTY

THE ASTROLOGY OF CHIRON, THE WOUNDED HEALER: FROM STRUGGLE

COMES STRENGTH

Way out in our solar system, careening between the orbital paths of Saturn and Uranus, there flies a small comet-like object we have carefully named Chiron. With a diameter roughly the distance between Key West and Miami, Chiron is tiny compared to the colossal objects moving through outer space.

Despite its diminutive size, however, Chiron has a deep and wide-ranging interpretation in astrology: The Wounded Healer.

When I refer to Chiron in a birth-chart reading and drop the phrase, “wounded healer,” most of my clients are excitedly curious about what this distant object has to say about their own psychic makeup and life experience. Something about the wounded healer resonates deeply with folks, I think because we are all wounded in some capacity, whether from childhood trauma, an awareness of society’s ills, profound environmental degradation or other pains.

The location of Chiron in your birth chart — meaning its place in the sky relative to the time and position of your birth — has much to tell about the paradoxical nature of your core, existential wound and your greatest gift as an arbiter of healing. Chiron represents a deep personal vulnerability, a persistent feeling of inadequacy in a particular area of your life experience.

24 | Keys Woman

To use myself as an example, Chiron falls in the sign of Gemini in my chart, and I have always had a visceral, sweaty-palmed fear of public speaking, feeling as if my voice and ideas are inconsequential at best and laughable at worst. Over the years, however, when I have pushed through the tightness in my chest and dry throat and shared my questions and thoughts with others, I have learned that my input and methods of articulation often have a helpful and positive impact on those around me. This is how Chiron operates in our psyche: to teach us that the way to our greatest gifts is through our most tender insecurities and traumas.

In Greek mythology, Chiron was a wise centaur, a creature that was half-human and half-horse. He was the son of the Titan Cronus, giving him immortality. He was a great warrior, teacher, and healer.

One version of his story tells us that, in a kerfuffle, Hercules accidentally shot Chiron in the thigh with a poisoned arrow. Unable to heal the wound and destined to be in pain forever due to his immortality, Chiron decided to sacrifice himself to help another tortured immortal. Chiron asked Zeus if he could exchange his immortality to free Prometheus, the Titan whom Zeus had sentenced to having his liver eaten out by an eagle every day, forever, because Prometheus stole fire from the gods and gifted it to humans. Zeus agreed, and Chiron was honored for his sacrifice by being placed among the stars in the constellation Sagittarius (or Centaurus, depending on who you ask).

CHIRON THROUGH THE SIGNS Your core wound and greatest gift for healing has to do with themes of:

This myth carries with it a method for understanding and working with your own Chiron placement. The constancy and incurability of your core wound is a deep lesson - focusing your energy trying to fix something that is inherently unfixable is a waste of your precious energy. Rather, by learning to live with this consistent vulnerability frees you to redirect your healing energy outwards. Ultimately, learning to love this vulnerability and make it sacred empowers you to support others struggling with similar pains.

In order to find your Chiron placement, you can use a free birth chart website like astro.com or astro-charts.com. The glyph or symbol for Chiron looks like a K with a circle at the bottom, or a key pointing upwards. Alternatively, you can simply find the sign your Chiron is in using the Chiron sign tables on cafeastrology.com. There are many factors that go into interpreting Chiron, including the house, sign, and any planetary angles related to it, but here is a description of Chiron through the signs that can help you get started.

Aries: individuality, self-esteem, courage, confidence, anger, aggression Taurus: material needs, sensory pleasures, stubbornness, inertia Gemini: intellect, communication, social anxiety, sociability Cancer: nurturing and being nurtured, home, emotional stability Leo: being seen, creative output, affirmations, being a center Virgo: being of service, feeling needed, ability to focus, preparation Libra: social justice, balance and counterbalance, relationships Scorpio: truth and lies, deep emotions and unconscious needs, taboo Sagittarius: faith and belief, ego, inspiration Capricorn: success, ethical concerns, authority Aquarius: being an outsider, radical ideas, renegade impulses Pisces: escapism, isolation, emotional flux, visionary

Astrologically, getting to know the lessons that Chiron has to offer is a process of confronting fear and pain in order to emerge empowered. As Brené Brown says, “We can’t rise strong when we’re on the run.”

fall/winter 2022 | 25

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BY MAISON BENITEZ

TAKE CARE OF YOU You have the opportunity to take small steps every day to take care of yourself. You have the power to set the direction of your day as soon as you wake up. You can decide if you’re going to have a positive mindset or if your first thought at the sound of the alarm will be, “Ugh, is it already time to get up?”

If you start your day with a negative thought, consider the tone that sets for the rest of your day. Starting your day with healthy habits will set you up for success. Journaling, limiting screen time first thing in the morning, and planning my movement of the day are three habits that help me.

JOURNALING: This is a great way to get any overwhelming thoughts on paper and out of your mind. It’s a good way to rid yourself of mental clutter. Write down your word of the day, daily affirmations, what you’re grateful for, movement of the day… the list goes on. There are plenty of prompts available online to get you started. Choose the ones that will benefit you the most. Start with a goal of journaling daily for one week and then you’ll discover a habit is forming. A habit that allows you to take a few minutes out of your hectic day for YOU. LIMIT SCREEN TIME: We’re all glued to our phone and/or computer screens all day. But we can control what we see when we first wake up. If emails and oth-

28 | Keys Woman

SET YOURSELF UP FOR SUCCESS er messages demanding your attention are the first thing you see, your mind is instantly thrown into a state of stress thinking about your obligations for the day and how you will manage it all. Instead, take a few minutes or even that first hour for yourself. Enjoy your morning routine and give your mind a break before taking on the day.

PLAN YOUR WORKOUTS: Whether it’s the night before or the morning of, making a plan to take care of your physical

health makes it less daunting. It doesn’t have to be a crazy ambitious plan, either.

A walk with the dog or a bike ride around the neighborhood are great. You can also sign up for workout classes, write out a workout, or find one online. Having a plan will help keep you accountable, get that movement in, and help maintain consistency.

SELF-CARE TIPS

As the seasons change, so too can we. (Granted, seasonal shifts are more subtle in our sunny island chain, but still serve as a reminder that nothing lasts forever.)

As the days grow shorter and the breeze gets cooler, take a few moments to take care of you.

Hit your reset button — physically, emotionally, socially, and professionally. Slow down and regroup. Relax, breathe and enjoy the cool relief of fall in the Florida Keys — before the chaos of the holidays replaces the cling of humidity.

Consider the following gentle suggestion to easily up your selfcare game — because taking care of yourself is always in season.

TAKE A DAY OFF AND STAY IN YOUR PJ’S.

BE SOMEONE’S CHEERLEADER, OR BE YOUR OWN CHEERLEADER.

COOK SOMETHING FROM SCRATCH.

MAY WE KNOW THEM MAY WE RAISE THEM MAY WE BE THEM

PLAY ON THE SWINGS.

CALL A LONG-DISTANCE FRIEND FOR A “HAPPY HOUR” CHAT WRITE DOWN YOUR HOPES FOR THE COMING YEAR.

HERE'S TO STRONG WOMEN

MAKE A CUP OF TEA AND READ AN ENTIRE MAGAZINE.

TELL SOMEONE YOU LOVE THEM OUT OF THE BLUE. CELEBRATE SMALL VICTORIES. SNUGGLE UP FOR A SCARY MOVIE — THEN LAUGH IT OFF WITH A CLASSIC LIKE “CADDYSHACK.” SLOW DOWN

SCROLL THROUGH FAVORITE PHOTOS — ON YOUR PHONE AND IN OLD-FASHIONED ALBUMS. LOSE YOURSELF IN A SHADY SPOT AND A GOOD BOOK.

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BY KAREN NEWFIELD

CLASSIC TWIST Few authors are more beloved than Jane Austen, the English novelist who dared to explore the dependence of women on marriage in the early 19th century. Revisit an old favorite or check out modern retellings — these witty, compelling reads capture the hearts and minds of women everywhere.

THE CLASSIC

SENSE AND SENSIBILITY Anonymously published in 1811, Austen’s first novel follows the three Dashwood sisters and their recently widowed mother as they find themselves poor by rules of inheritance. While Elinor quietly falls in love with a sensible match, the emotional Marianne proclaims her passion for the dashing unsuitable John Willoughby. Through their opposing temperaments towards love, the sisters yearn for happiness in a society where status and money prevail.

THE RETELL

LADIES OF THE HOUSE

By Lauren Edmonson Eldest daughter of a senator, Daisy Richardson does her best to manage the maze of Washington politics. She and her feisty sister Wallis have spent their lives dutifully shaking hands and smiling. Their mother Cricket, masterful dinner host, expects them to maintain their social standing at all times. When their father dies in the arms of his mistress, sorrow quickly turns to media scandal. Daisy clings to her friend (secret crush) Atlas. As a journalist, he is determined to get the dirt while protecting Daisy. These women must join forces to save their family and their futures.

30 | Keys Woman

THE CLASSIC

PRIDE & PREJUDICE In the distinguished Bennet household live five lovely daughters. There is one misfortune, no son. Hence, no heir.

Mrs. Bennet is desperate to marry her daughters and secure their family’s financial future. The Bennet’s lives are turned upside down as they proceed through the busy season of balls, teas and social gatherings. Everything changes when the wealthy Mr. Bingley arrives, followed by his best friend Mr. Darcy. As this tale of love and values unfolds during class conscious 18th century England, the girls must learn the tricky art of following their hearts.

THE RETELL

UNMARRIAGEABLE

By Soniah Kamal When Bark Binat falls out of his brother’s graces, this wealthy Pakistani family loses everything. He moves his wife and five daughters to the town of Dilipabad. Jena and Alys, the eldest sisters, teach English Literature at the British School and mother spends every waking moment trying to find them husbands.

When they are invited to the biggest wedding of the year, she convinces the girls this is their last chance for marriage. In Pakistani culture, where marriage and position are the highest priority, this wellloved classic merges past and present, laughing all the way to the altar.

THE CLASSIC PERSUASION Living with her pretentious family on the edge of bankruptcy, Anne Elliott is a 27-year-old woman who abandoned her one true love. When the handsome Frederick and Anne were engaged, she was sadly persuaded by friends and family to end that relationship due to his social class — or lack thereof. Living with that regret, the two fortuitously meet again eight years later. Still single, they cannot deny their intense chemistry remains intact. An intimate portrait of a woman considered past her prime may have a second chance at happiness.

THE RETELL

BY THE BOOK

By Julia Sonneborn Anne Corey, an English professor at a small prestigious college in California will do whatever it takes to receive tenure. Currently on track and determined to get her book published, Anne’s plan begins to unravel when her devastatingly handsome ex-fiance (first love) Adam Martinez shows up as the new college president. Preoccupied with her ailing father, obnoxious, overbearing sister and the new (very sexy) writer-in-residence, Anne has to work hard to remain focused and stay out of trouble. This remake has plenty of twists to keep you wondering if Anne will end up with her true love.

THE CLASSIC EMMA Enchanting, clever and overly self confident, Emma Woodhouse is a restless young woman in the fictional little town of Highbury. After her governess marries she is left on her own. In this satire of social class, marriage, wealth and the loneliness of growing up, Emma survives a journey of misguided mismatches and romantic mishaps to finally learn that love was right in front of her all along.

THE RETELL IF I COULD WRITE A BOOK

By Karen M. Cox Set in horse country Kentucky, Emma leaves her small women’s college to return home and care for her father after his stroke. Her sister is married with small children and her aunt has sacrificed her young life caring for Emma’s family. It is up to Emma to fill the place in their family home and community. Beautiful, smart and loved by all, this sweet mini saga turns romance when George Knightley, the most eligible bachelor in town watches Emma grow into the woman he always dreamed she’d become. Emma remake with a charming southern drawl.

fall/winter 2022 | 31

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ANNUAL ZONTA ABC WALK/RUN NOVEMBER 5 AT HIGGS BEACH Zonta Club of Key West is excited to host the 30th Annual ABC (Awareness Breast Cancer) 10K and 5K Walk/Run on Saturday, November 5 at Higgs Beach. This event raises money to cover mammograms and other diagnostic and preventive screenings for women in the Lower Keys who otherwise cannot afford them.

Join the hundreds of runners and walkers for this year’s events by registering now at tinyurl.com/abc30th

fall/winter 2022 | 33

The women to watch WOMEN MAKE IT WORK. THEY JUGGLE JOBS, FAMILY, FINANCE AND FITNESS. AND THESE FOUR ARE DOING IT ALL BEFORE THEIR 40TH BIRTHDAY. WATCH WHAT HAPPENS.

34 | Keys Woman

THE ONE LOBBYING FOR A BETTER FLORIDA KEYS

Add eighth-generation Floridian and Keys native Kate DeLoach to the list of heavy hitters in Tallahassee. DeLoach is an avid runner, adventurer and admirer of the island’s salt air. But DeLoach, a lobbyist, also plays a key role when it comes to highlighting complex issues facing the Florida Keys to state leaders and advancing solutions for a better island life.

The Tavernier resident’s experience in government goes back many years to when she served as an aide to then-State Rep. Holly Raschein for six years. Her time in government opened the doors to relationships with an array of individuals and organizations from the local, state and federal levels. Today, as a lobbyist with The Southern Group, she’s guiding the priorities of her clients, which include organizations like the Florida Keys Aqueduct Authority, Mote Marine Laboratory, Monroe County Schools and Truman Little White House Foundation, to name a few. From environmental policy and housing for first responders in Key West, to simply bringing organizations back the much-needed bread, DeLoach works to ensure Tallahassee isn’t forgetting the southernmost district.

When she’s not roaming the state capitol’s halls, DeLoach spends time with her husband, John. She enjoys reading, Florida Keys history and fishing. DeLoach also devotes time to the community as a member of the Mariners Hospital Board, Florida Keys History & Discovery Foundation, Good Health Clinic and Monroe County Preservation Commission.

BY JIM McCARTHY

We tapped DeLoach for a little interview to give us some insight into what makes her tick, what keeps her grounded and what people might not know about her.

What would your theme song be? “Eye of the Tiger.”

What superpower would you choose? To fly.

What calms your mind after a long day? A cup of tea and some light meditation.

What show did you last binge watch? The Office. It will never not be funny.

What three things would you have to bring with you if you were stranded on a deserted island? Flint, knife and a mosquito net. (We watch too much “Man vs. Wild”.)

What’s your go-to birthday dinner? A delicious broiled Florida lobster tail.

Morning person or a night owl? In yet another sign of my increasing age, I must admit I am now a morning person. Running at sunrise is the most incredible way to start the day.

What makes you laugh, no matter what? My husband John and our cats, Porkchop and Pickle.

Best piece of advice you’ve been given? Be kind, work hard and try your best to do good.

Who is the most inspirational person in your life? Definitely my dad. He’s a force and the true definition of a renaissance man. More than anything, he’s curious, and always ready to see a new place or go on a new adventure.

Favorite smell? Ohh, that’s tough. After being in Tallahassee for weeks in committee and session, the smell of sea air when you hit Jewfish Creek bridge is the most wonderful smell in the world.

Would you rather be trapped in a building with no way out or lost at sea? Lost at sea? Maybe you could be found eventually?

What item do you already have too many of but can’t help but keep buying? Kino sandals. I can’t stop.

Puppies or kittens? Both?

Most badass moment in your life so far? Another really tough one! There is nothing that makes you feel more badass than successfully getting something funded in the budget for a client or passing a piece of legislation.

What’s the last lie you told? See above (my mind is never calm, ha!).

Best compliment you’ve ever received? That I’m too “nice.”

I haven’t found that makes me any less effective.

What’s your favorite word? I’m a lobbyist, so my favorite word is “yes.”

What word makes your skin crawl? The word that makes my skin crawl is “no.”

fall/winter 2022 | 35

THE ONE WHO KEEPS THINGS MOVING

Jessica Borraccino is a go-getter, in every sense of the word. The mother of two is a marathon runner and superstar realtor, all while managing more vacation rental properties than we can keep track of. Her drive to achieve new professional heights comes through even over the phone – when we asked her what her least favorite word was, she blew right past the usual suspect (“moist”), telling Keys Weekly she HATES to be called “unresponsive.”

Borraccino moved to the Keys in 2011, initially landing a job at Dynasty Marine for a year before earning her real estate license and wading into the vacation rental industry. Along the way, she met her husband Nick at a birthday party, and the couple now have two little ones: Isla (5) and Benny (1). Her hard work immediately began paying dividends, as she received Coldwell Banker’s Rising Star Award and the Middle and Lower Keys Association of Realtors Rookie of the Year in 2014.

But for all her professional success, we know that career alone does not define a person. So naturally, we had some totally “professional” questions for one of the Middle Keys’ premier realtors.

36 | Keys Woman

BY ALEX RICKERT

What was the last show you binge watched? “Yellowstone” with my husband. I don’t really watch TV, but honestly, it’s good.

What would your theme song be? “Heartache on the Dance Floor” by Jon Pardi What is your go-to birthday dinner? Hideaway Cafe Are you a morning person or a night owl? Morning person. I have a 1-year-old, so I’m usually up between 5 and 7 a.m. depending on him.

What makes you laugh no matter what? My husband’s stupid jokes. He always says “that’s what she said,” and it doesn’t matter if it’s stupid. It’s funny.

What calms your mind after a long day? Running. I usually do the Key West half-marathon and run around Marathon, and I did the Keys 100 this year.

If you were stranded on a deserted island, what three things would you have to bring? Water, my phone and my Chapstick.

What’s the best piece of advice you’ve ever been given?

Brian Schmitt always tells me, “You’re still breathing, you’re still alive,” whenever things get hard. That keeps me going.

Who is the most inspirational woman in your life? My grandma. She’s self-made and self-sufficient, and just really a happy, go-for-it person.

What’s your favorite smell? I love the smell of Christmas trees. It reminds me of home (Sedalia, Missouri).

What’s one item that you already have too many of, but you can’t stop buying? Running shoes. I love Hokas or On Clouds.

What is the most badass moment in your life so far?

Finishing the Keys 100 and doing my first half-marathon were pretty amazing. Professionally, just hitting milestones that I set for myself in terms of gross rents collected.

What’s the last lie you told? I told somebody recently that they were doing a really great job when they weren’t. That was today.

What was the best compliment you ever received? Honestly, I just love whenever people say I go above and beyond and are appreciative of what I do professionally, because I really do put my whole heart into everything I do at work.

What’s your favorite word? My favorite word I really can’t say, because it’s a bad word. But I would say my favorite word is “awesome.” I use it all the time.

What word makes your skin crawl? I hate the word “unresponsive.” I would never wish that word upon my worst enemy.

fall/winter 2022 | 37

THE ONE WHO’S ALWAYS SMILING

Dr. Natalia Vazquez DMD is quick to admit she knew nothing about Key West before her husband received orders from the Navy to move here in 2014.

“I honestly didn’t even know that Florida had keys,” said Vazquez, a dentist who joined Doc Guzman Family Dentistry in early 2015. Although unfamiliar with Key West, Vazquez immediately felt at home in the warm weather, tropical waters and close-knit community, given its similarities to her native Puerto Rico.

“I grew up fishing, diving and boating,” she said. “I just love the community here, and the fact that you always see people you know. And I love the safety and security of this town and at The Basilica School for my daughters. That’s one thing that wasn’t always guaranteed in Puerto Rico.”

Not only did she grow up on one island and settle on another, but Vazquez and her family also spent a few years on a much different island on the other side of the world — Japan.

“We were stationed there from 2011 to 2014, which was quite an experience,” she said.

38 | Keys Woman

Upon arriving in Key West, Vazquez and her husband, who had been a dentist in the Navy, attended a seminar for continuing education at a local hotel conference room, where she met Dr. Hector Guzman.

“He said, ‘I haven’t seen you guys at these things before. Are you currently working anywhere? And do you want a job?’”

Vazquez still had to pass her Florida board certification exams, and so joined Guzman’s practice as an assistant in January 2015. She passed her state exams later that year and began practicing. When her husband, Oscar Rodriguez, finished his navy career, he, too, joined Guzman’s practice.

In addition to her family dentistry clients, Vazquez steps out of her comfort zone a few days a month to provide dental services to inmates at the jail on Stock Island.

“I had never set foot in a jail before, and now I have a contract to provide dental work there,” she said, adding that she doesn’t want to know her patients’ charges. “I never look at the sheriff’s office website, where the mugshots are posted.”

The jail job offers Vazquez a poignant reminder of how many people struggle in the Florida Keys, how many are uninsured and have never been to a dentist regularly.

“Sadly, most of what I do there are extractions, because some people have such poor dental health, but because the jail population is so transient, there’s no time for extended treatment programs. I know I’ll only see someone once before they’re either released or sentenced to state prison.”

We wanted to get to know a bit more about Natalia, so we asked her a few more fun questions....

BY MANDY MILES

What would your theme song be? “Sunday Morning” by Maroon 5 What superpower would you choose? Time travel What calms your mind after a long day? A shower and a good nap.

What show did you last binge watch? “Partner Track” on Netflix What three things would you have to bring with you if you were stranded on a deserted island? A big hat, a harpoon and snorkeling gear What’s your go-to birthday dinner? Italian food, pasta Morning person or a night owl? Morning person What makes you laugh, no matter what? Farts Best piece of advice you’ve been given? If it’s out of your hands, it deserves freedom from your mind, too.

Who is the most inspirational person in your life?

My father, Rafael A. Vázquez Ortiz. Nothing worried him, nothing stopped him.

Favorite smell? Cinnamon Would you rather be trapped in a building with no way out or lost at sea? Lost at sea What item do you already have too many of but can’t help but keep buying? Purses and plants Puppies or kittens? Puppies Most badass moment in your life so far? Still working on it, but hiking the Huayhuash Mountain range of Peru for 8 days straight came pretty close.

What’s the last lie you told? I’m going to eat less ice cream.

Best compliment you’ve ever received? “You are blindly kind.”

What’s your favorite word? Maybe What word makes your skin crawl? Cockroach

fall/winter 2022 | 39

THE ONE WHO GIVES US HOPE FOR THE FUTURE

When the women of the Keys Weekly were tossing around ideas of women to watch under 40, one of the first names that came to mind was Maison Benitez. Not only is she under 40, but she’s under 25 and is more accomplished and professional than many people twice her age. But….

Maison works in our office, and we didn’t want to appear as if we’re playing favorites. But we also didn’t want Maison’s job to work against her, so we’ve included her here as an honorable mention.

Maison doesn’t work for the Keys Weekly, but rather for our sister company, Overseas Media Group (OMG), a digital marketing agency that offers website development, digital advertising and social media. Maison was the first social media manager and digital strategist hired by OMG’s COO Annie Briening, and the one Annie wants to clone as the company continues to grow.

“I manage our social media accounts at OMG, meaning I create content; I develop strategy, meet with clients regularly and post to all their social media accounts,” she said. “This was my dream job. I had started doing social media for a gym I worked at in North Carolina when I was 15 and I loved it.”

She joined OMG when she was still 19 and finishing her bachelor’s degree in communications. “I was working full time and a full-time student, finishing my degree online at Florida International University,” she said.

But Maison’s personal ambition started long before she joined OMG. She had graduated high school with an associate’s degree. It was a five-year program that she finished in 4 ½ years.

40 | Keys Woman

She moved to Key West in December 2019 and interned with the nonprofit Reef Relief, where she handled their social media as well. In May 2020, she took a job at FYT Key West, where she met Briening, who works out there.

“My parents were talking about moving to Fort Myers, and I knew I couldn’t afford to live in Key West with just my gym job.

When Annie interviewed me for OMG, it seemed a perfect fit.”

The company’s social media clients include local construction companies, restaurants and resorts. “All of our clients are Keys--based, so we’re more familiar with them and the surrounding community,” she said.

She’s engaged to Damien Sellers and is planning her wedding for January 2023.

(Oh, and did we mention that Maison is also a certified personal trainer? We’re exhausted just writing about her, but we did have just a few more questions....)

BY MANDY MILES

What would your theme song be? “You Say” by Lauren Daigle What superpower would you choose? Teleportation What calms your mind after a long day? Working out on my porch with good music.

What show did you last binge watch? “Stranger Things” What three things would you have to bring with you if you were stranded on a deserted island? A book, water, and a knife.

What’s your go-to birthday dinner? Italian food or steak.

Morning person or a night owl? Morning person What makes you laugh, no matter what? Impersonations or being tickled.

Best piece of advice you’ve been given? When people tell you who they are, believe them. Surround yourself with people who free up their time to see you, not only see you on their free time.

Who is the most inspirational person in your life and why? Both of my parents. They have taught me great life les-

sons of being a hard worker and have been examples of what a loving relationship looks like. I am still constantly learning from them and go to them for advice when needed.

Favorite smell? Warm vanilla or baking sweets in the oven.

Would you rather be trapped in a building with no way out or lost at sea? Lost at sea What item do you already have too many of, but can’t help but keep buying? Workout clothes Puppies or kittens? Puppies Most badass moment in your life so far? Receiving my bachelor’s degree at 20 years old.

What’s the last lie you told? Saying “I’m good” when asked if I need help.

Best compliment you’ve ever received? That I’m mature for my age or well beyond my age What’s your favorite word? Empowerment. Intentional.

Gratitude.

What word makes your skin crawl? Roaches

fall/winter 2022 | 41

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THE WORLD HAS BECOME A DIFFICULT PLACE FOR DIFFICULT DECISIONS. OR MAYBE IT ALWAYS WAS AND WE WERE JUST ABLE TO PERIODICALLY IGNORE THAT FACT WHEN CONVENIENCE AND PRIVILEGE ALLOWED. THROUGHOUT THE COURSE OF ANYONE’S LIFE THOUGH, THE TIME TO IGNORE THAT FACT DISAPPEARS WHEN THE CONVERSATION TURNS PERSONAL. WHETHER IT’S RACE, RELIGION, ORIENTATION, LEGAL RIGHTS OR STATE-SANCTIONED ACCESS TO RESOURCES, THE NEED TO FIGHT RATHER THAN CONVERSE BECOMES REAL WHEN THE CONVERSATION HITS HOME.

CONVERSATIONS AND CONFLICT 44 | Keys Woman

This past June, millions of women across the country felt the time for conversation subsiding when The Supreme Court overturned the original 1973 Roe v. Wade ruling that guaranteed federal access to abortion. Emotions erupted on both sides of the argument with opponents of the decision fearing a loss of federal legislative rights, and on a more personal level, loss of access to medical resources that for many had, until that point, been available their entire lifetimes. Proponents of the rollback argued on the basis of ensuring proper legality and setting precedence for the potential limiting of federal oversight into such laws, essentially pushing more power to the states.

The case carried a note from Supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito, citing that the decision “concerns the constitutional right of abortion and no other right.” Justice Clarence Thomas immediately contradicted Alito’s words with his own, stating that indeed, the same legal rationale behind the decision could be applied unilaterally with regards to decisions such as the legalization of gay marriage, the decriminilization of homosexuality, and the right to access contraceptives. He continued that, “for that reason, in future cases, we should reconsider all” precedents.

And right here is the moment where open conversation is so desperately needed and yet, is in remarkably short supply. So much of what we’re all addressing as Americans at this moment in time comes down to basic humanity, or rather a human-ness. Most adults can carry on a civil conversation with another adult assuming the topic stays in a safe zone that doesn’t allow for much difference of opinion, say, an impending hurricane. We can all agree that hurricanes are bad news and we should probably fill our cars with

gas and board up our windows. Easy enough. When that same conversation jumps to the next level, though, whether to evacuate, most people can still manage to have a constructive conversation regardless of their personal decision.

Provided, of course, that everyone has access to the same resources (money, a car, somewhere to go), we are content to make our own choices and get on our way…or not. Jump that up a level to a mandatory evacuation. People have lost their autonomous choice, and some are going to be upset about that.

Most can see though that it’s a decision based on protecting the greater good, or at its coldest and most calculated level, a decision based on the metric that determines how many rescue workers’ lives will be endangered and how many resources will be sacrificed by the city or state. But no one ever has to discuss a hurricane in which people are forced to stay. Let’s imagine that a Category 4 is roaring our way and suddenly an order is issued and a blockade is placed.

Even if the powers that be argued that we placed ourselves in such a position by choosing to live in a susceptible area, it wouldn’t go over well. Conversations turn to fights when we need to protect ourselves and our loved ones.

Concepts of legal precedence and the mechanisms of Constitutional law fall by the wayside when the rights that drive our entire lives are put on the table.

When bodies and marriages are up for consideration, the world tilts and feels a little less safe. As a woman, who has been legally married to another woman for over a decade (at the state level prior to the 2015 federal ruling), I can personally say that, as much as I enjoy legal and legislative semantics, that game is of no interest to me when it directly affects my well-being and that of my family. I would be happy to have endless the-

oretical conversations about marriage or about LGBTQ history. Fascinating.

Harmless. Informative. Thought-provoking. All things that a conversation should be. What I am not interested in is mounting a defense of my right to share tax and medical implications or parental rights with my spouse.

Perhaps the federal legal structure supporting gay marriage isn’t perfect. But, it serves as course-correction where it was needed. Perhaps Roe v.

Wade should never have followed the legal path it did. Same for Brown v. Board of Education. Or Loving v. Virginia. I’ll concede a point to Thomas (something I never thought I’d do), but with a major caveat. Yes, the federal government, or more specifically, nine individuals representing the whole of our diverse country, should not have to decide cases affecting personal rights. But, we live in an imperfect world, and in a country with a skeletal system built during much simpler times.

Issues arise when conversations stop and conflict starts. Conflict starts when people are threatened. When people are threatened, they turn to a more powerful entity for help. I personally want to feel protected by my government and commend decisions, like Loving v. Virginia, that we now see, with the benefit of hindsight to have been made in the best interest of humanity and in response to those who fought when they needed, and asked that higher entity for help. That, that is the purpose and importance of such rulings.

fall/winter 2022 | 45

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fall/winter 2022 | 47

Would y

BY ALEX RICKERT

CONNECTING WITH FRIENDS… ON A WHOLE DIFFERENT LEV 48 | Keys Woman

you rather...

…

VEL

I’VE GOT A QUESTION FOR YOU

Would you rather have every stoplight you ever come to for the rest of your life be red when you first get there, or turn into a loaf of bread for 24 hours every year?

Yes, that’s a serious question.

A few weeks ago, the Keys Weekly Media Group held its annual company retreat out on Pigeon Key. After a fantastic day of swimming, jet skiing and absolutely no alcoholic beverages**, six of us found ourselves at the end of the island’s dock late into the night.

I had brought along a game I used to play with my old coworkers, but part of me was hesitant to break it out. For context, this is a card game we used to play in our spare time that poses absurd hypothetical questions to its players.

I have watched it inspire hysterical screaming matches among friends over questions like the one that began this article.

At the risk of blatantly advertising a risqué – that’s putting it lightly – product, let’s just say the card game is perfectly summarized by its tagline: “Questions as (expletive) up as you are.” Let me be abundantly clear: the scenarios posed by this game are *wildly* inappropriate – I could only print about 10% of them, at best, in this magazine – and violate all social conventions about equality, political correctness and the like. I am NOT officially endorsing them.

But as the six of us on that dock with filthy senses of humor could tell you, they were also hilarious. You know you’ve got something good on your hands when two grown adults get out of bed on their nearby boat to rejoin the group after overhearing a few spirited debates.

For the next few hours, we laughed until we could barely breathe as we took turns commenting on ridiculous propositions, ranging from crimes we’d commit if we knew we’d never get caught, to our willingness to belittle fellow humans publicly for sums of money. We even found out which of us was the least opposed to bestiality, specifically with a goat.

It was irreverent, it was hysterical, and it was just plain fun. For the first time in I can’t even remember how long, the six of us sat together and barely touched our phones. And let me tell you, that does NOT happen for six media people. That one night alone sparked a group text thread that kept the camaraderie going to this day, and in the strangest of ways I feel like I know my coworkers so much better just from those few hours.

Nights like those remind me of the importance of taking the time to unplug, spend time in nature, and share genuine laughs with the people you share your life with. In a results-oriented world, sometimes our relationships with fantastic people in our lives can be constrained to narrow one-dimensional entities, and it’s on us to broaden those channels – even in the most ridiculous of ways.

It’s something I would encourage everyone reading this to do. Grab a friend and try an activity you’ve never done before. Invite that coworker or classmate to an after-hours event. Do something, anything, out of the box. No phones, just human connection.

I guarantee you won’t regret it. **this is a load of crap fall/winter 2022 | 49

NUMBERS DO LIE

IN FASHION

BY KIRBY MYERS

“What size are you?”

Wait, don’t answer that. The number means nothing.

And I don’t mean that in the, “You’re only as old as you feel,” sort of way. I mean that in the fashion world, sizing is shockingly subjective.

Whether it’s an exclusive high-end fashion house or a big box chain store, any brand can decide what its “real sizing” is. Sizing between brands — and even within the same brand — has become inconsistent to a degree that truly astonishes me.

I’d heard of vanity sizing, sure, but not until I opened a resale boutique a couple years ago did I fully understand its reality and implications. (Vanity sizing is the phenomenon by which clothing of the same numerical size has become bigger in physical size over time.)

Sizing is not determined by some agreed-upon industry standard, but rather by some company executives deciding how big a “size 2” will be that season.

The U.S. did institute standard clothing sizes based on various measurements back in 1958, according to a 2016 Time.com article by Eliana Dockterman.

“But by 1983, that standard had fallen by the wayside. And experts argue it would fail now too, for the same reason: there is no “standard” U.S. body type,” Dockterman writes.

“The rise of so-called vanity sizing has rendered most labels meaningless,” the article states.

50 | Keys Woman

“As Americans have grown physically larger, brands have shifted their metrics to make shoppers feel skinnier — so much so that a women’s size 12 in 1958 is now a size 6. Those numbers are even more confusing given that a pair of size 6 jeans can vary in the waistband by as much as 6 inches, according to one estimate.”

The inconsistency is an irresponsible and misleading marketing ploy that creates unrealistic expectations and harsh judgments among women.

My inventory of “pre-loved” items includes literally hundreds of different designers, styles, cuts and sizes.

One day, I looked at two different pairs of pants I had pulled for a social media photo shoot. One was a size 6 and one was a 10. Did they feel or fit differently? NOPE. And here’s the kicker: Both pants were the same brand. What the hell? No wonder we’re so messed up about body image.

So what can we do as women and consumers?

First, learn to eyeball clothes to determine which garments you’ll try on. It will take practice but is worth the time and effort. Fun Fact: Shorts, skirts or any bottoms are the easiest to judge for fit — wrap the waistband around your neck and if the ends just touch, they’ll likely work.

Don’t shop by size, but by fit. I promise, the number on that tag means nothing, but it can certainly mess with our heads.

Next, when you find something that fits well and feels good, BUY IT. If you’re bothered by the number on the tag, cut that bitch off, right there at the register. A number is not confidence; it is B.S. And it does not determine your worth.

I will probably struggle on some level with self image until the day I die, as will many women I know.

But there are some things we can do to minimize the doubt and insecurity that’s been so lucratively packaged into our adolescent minds and seamlessly swept into our adulthood: Shop for our bodies, NOT for the size. Try on clothes that LOOK like they are your size, clothes that feel good and FIT WELL. This small change will do wonders for your confidence.

You’ll find you have more shopping options and a much happier closet.

Let’s change the way we look at sizing, kick insecurities to the curb and be the confident women we were born to be.

Be kind to yourself. Give grace. Breathe. And buy the damn dress (in whatever size fits).

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fall/winter 2022 | 51

REL A T SHIPIONE DIT ION

The things we do

WEEKLY STAFF

We’ve all been there. We’ve met our dream person, fallen head over heels, madly in love and replaced our real besties with the new fling. We get it, love is grand.

But before you make some huge leap of faith (whatever that looks like in your world) here are some tough questions and conversation starters that could make or break your future together.

How deeply in debt ARE you?

What’s with the action figures in your bedroom?

Wait, you’re serious, your mom still does your laundry?

So really, dogs, not kids?

HOW MANY TIMES HAVE YOU BEEN MARRIED?

Are you, or have you ever been, a LARPer?

What is that smell?

When/if your elderly parents need to be cared for, will they move in with you/us?

When was the last time you were tested for STDs?

What are your thoughts on a prenup?

Any crazy baby mamas I need to know about?

You weren’t joking about couch surfing professionally?

DO YOU EVER SEE YOURSELF GETTING MARRIED?

DID YOU JUST SAY YOU’VE NEVER VOTED?

Is “Nightmare Before Christmas” a Halloween or Christmas movie? Seriously, this is important.

52 | Keys Woman

Do you have to attend any court-ordered meetings?

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THERE'S SOMETHING ABOUT MARY Integrity. Vision. Success. For Islamorada.

THE PRIORITIES. THE COMMITMENT. TAX-AND-SPEND MENTALITY MUST END FIGHT FOR THE HEALTH AND SURVIVAL OF FLORIDA BAY FINALIZE THE FILLS, AND GET IT RIGHT ADDRESS WORKFORCE HOUSING, GO AFTER ILLEGAL VACATION RENTALS MAKE TRAFFIC IMPACTS A KEY COMPONENT OF EVERY DECISION FOCUS ON SOLUTIONS FOR THE PEOPLE OF ISLAMORADA AND FUTURE GENERATIONS

MARY BARLEY WHERE I COME FROM. The environment is Islamorada’s economy. The Everglades provide us with our drinking water and Florida Bay with the freshwater it needs to survive. The combination drives our region's $20+ billion tourist economy and makes us the sportfishing capital of the world. Too often these ties are left out of the conversation at Village Hall. That changes on Day One. I love my adopted hometown and will bring a sharp mind, pragmatic discipline, and eyes for the future to the Village Council.

Paid by Mary Barley for Islamorada Village Council, Seat 2.

Mary

fall/winter 2022 | 55

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