‘FAVA’ 24 May 1951 | 29 July 2014
Shared memories of a man taken from our midst way too soon.
Steven Raymond Steven RaymondFava Fava
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f you were to ask most people the following question, chances are you’d get a few strange looks — followed by “I don’t know, really.” The question: What’s Fava’s first and/or middle name? This, of course, is because to most, Steven Raymond Fava, born 24 May 1951, for generations of young men, was simply Fava. Sure, the Mister was there — but he didn’t care much about titles. He was perfectly fine with just being plain, ole Fava. That’s why the cover says just “Fava.” And without fail, thousands of Oratory students and alums would always just call him that. And they’d call him that well beyond their four to six years at Oratory because for scores of young men, Fava wasn’t just part of life during middle school and/or high school — he was part of their lives, well, forever. Whether it was for dinners at Marco Polo, or The Office, or the Broadway Diner or his apartment on Summit Avenue, Fava didn’t simply disappear from Oratorians’ lives after they went on to college, university or work. He was always part of their lives. And that’s because he was a very special man who never held a job a day in his life. Instead, he lived his vocation — one that at first saw him spend 10 years in the Society of Jesus as a Jesuit scholastic (seminarian for those unfamiliar with Jesuit terms) and for 34 years as an educator at Oratory Preparatory School. Teaching wasn’t a job at all. It was just a way of life for him, one that started at Regis High School in New York, then at St. Peter’s Prep in Jersey City — and then finally and once and for all beginning in September 1980, at Oratory, in Summit.
He liked to let it be known his tenure spanned that of several presidents: Jimmy Carter. Ronald Reagan, George H. W. Bush, Bill Clinton, George W. Bush and Barack Obama. There were numerous headmasters he outlasted, from the Rev. Floyd Rotunno, to the Rev. Paul Manning, to Joe Boland, to the Rev. Kevin Murphy, to Brother Robert J. Wickman, F.S.C., to Tim Lynch, to Marlene Kostka, to Robert Costello. If you gave him an alum’s name, he could tell you what year he graduated. If you asked him a question about Oratory Prep, or its predecessor, Carlton Academy, he could answer it since he was a walking, living encyclopedia of the school’s history — and the school’s archivist. If you asked him a question about the Royal Family, he could answer it without hesitation, because he loved the Royals ... and England ... almost as much as he loved life itself. Fava, simply, was Oratory Prep. There hasn’t been a graduate since the Class of 1980, who didn’t know what Oratory life was like without him. And that legacy will live on until the current class of 2019 finally leaves for bigger things. Imagine that for just a second. Nearly every graduate from the Class of 1981 to the Class of 2019 will have known Fava. That’s a span of nearly 40 years. Only Jack Horan and Walter Crum can top that! When the school’s doors open for the first time in September 2014, it will be the first September since 1979 that a man by the name of Fava isn’t there. What a legacy, indeed. Fava will be missed by so many — from current students and faculty, to alums, to former teachers, to his former Jesuit colleagues to the many friends he had all over the world. He will never, ever be replaced. No one should even try to pick up his legacy, because no matter how hard that person tried, it would be futile. There will never be another Fava anywhere. But how lucky are we, those who knew what a special man he was? Rest in peace, our friend. Rest in peace, “Fava.”
A special word of thanks to all contributors to this remembrance To all those who took the time to write memorial tributes to Steve Fava, a special word of thanks. I hope this e-booklet serves as a lifetime reminder of just how important a man Fava truly was to countless men and women who at one point or another walked through the doors of One Beverly Road, Summit, N.J. May he be forever in our minds and forever in our hearts — for he will be forever missed. — Kevin Canessa Jr.
‘He always treated me the same way ... as an equal’ Bill McCrystal Jr., ’04 and current faculty member
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hether as a 14 year old in his 9th-grade English class, a senior in his AP English course, a colleague for six years, or as a friend, Steve Fava treated me the same way...as an equal. We shared an immense love for learning, but also an affinity for Yankees baseball, The Simpsons, and most importantly, OP. He was a friend to my father and a supporter when my father passed this September.
Fava was and will always be the epitome of what it should mean to be part of Oratory Prep. He was a gentleman, a dedicated educator, and an excellent product of the Jesuit mantra, a man
for others. Yet, he was also a partner in crime, a teller of jokes, a doer of puzzles, a drinker of Scotch, and a “reprimander” of wrong doing. He was everything that a teacher should strive to be. He will be missed, but never, ever forgotten. Vale for now.
Burt P. Sempier Class of 2009
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est in Peace Mr. Fava. A true legend at OP. He taught us all so much, maybe even more so out of class. I’d like to think he passed some of his love of history on to me. All of us who shared a classroom with him or a simple hello in the hallway are lucky to have known, interacted and laughed with the man. His memory will live on in all who knew him.
‘The most blunt, honest & genuine man I’ve ever met’
P.J. Doyle ’07
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o the most blunt, honest and genuine man I’ve ever met, it’s actually near impossible to pick a single fond memory. They all were. I was fortunate enough to have Fava all four years at OP (senior year we had him back to back and we’d walk with him to Newman Hall for English and walk back down for religion). He’s the reason I got to school an hour early
every day, to sit and bullshit over crossword puzzles, Taylor Ham and black coffee ... and the reason I’d stay late some days. He’s the epitome of the phrase “Heroes get remembered, legends never die,” because that’s exactly what he is. The oratory legend of Fava is eternal. Everyone has at least one story — they always will — and that’s what made him special.
The eighth-grade advancement
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he advancement ceremony for the eighth-graders was always one of Steve’s favorite days of the school year. And though he never really admitted why, it was pretty clear. At the end of the ceremony, he would, without fail, with Irene Crum, give to each advancing eighth-grader some form of British currency to keep, a school memento (usually an Oratory Keychain) and that day’s New York Times Crossword Puzzle. It was always fitting that the man who loved England so much, Oratory so much and the New York Times crosswords so much would give each such a gift. He absolutely delighted in it. And, of course, he expected each young man to complete the crossword later that night. Only Fava!
The Mika Brothers ‘He was our favorite reason to be at Oratory during our years as students’
He was our favorite reason to be at Oratory during our years as students. During my family’s time at Oratory he became more than a teacher and a mentor. We considered him our friend.
The Puzzle
IN HIS OWN WORDS
Fava’s 2007 Commencement Address June 2, 2007 — his three paragraph mission statement greeted you upon your arrival at Oratory four, five, or six years ago. It is appropriate at a conclusion to look back at the expectations set out for you at the start. I would like to review one part of this document and two statements which you made a few weeks ago in the survey I asked you to fill out in preparation for this address. A mission statement outlines goals to be achieved, usually within a certain timeframe. Well, unlike a certain leader of the free world, I will not proclaim - “mission accomplished.” None of the components of this document can be achieved totally – they are lifetime pursuits. I want to focus on one “ to develop effective learners.” From your suggestions I want to address two items: You said that you wanted college “ to continue to shape us in knowledge” and “Don’t be so quick to shoot something down just because it is different.” You want to continue to learn and you want an open approach. You said what the mission statement said– you seek to
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continue to develop as effective learners. One character from literature and one from philosophy provide us with good examples of effective learners. You may recall from freshmen English that when we started a new genre (poetry, epic, drama) I always said we have to go back to ancient Greece. I will do so again today. Open to learning. Socrates was told that the Delphic oracle had said that he was the wisest man in Athens. Skeptical as always, he thought that this pronouncement was not correct, but how could the oracle be wrong? He decided to test his own thinking. He questioned, at length, a poet, a politician, and a military man. He found them to be experts in their respective fields. But he also noted that they thought that they were therefore experts in all areas. This was not true. He concluded that he was the wisest man in so far as he knew what he did not know. Such an insight is a key to being an effective learner for life. Your second observation about approaching college dealt with being open to people and ideas and not quickly condemning something just because it is different. In the
poet Tennyson’s dramatic monologue he quotes Odysseus as follows: “Much have I seen and known, cities of men, And manners, climates, councils, governments… I am a part of all that I met” Odysseus clearly was a man with an infinite curiosity, which sometimes cost him. He was open to that which was different. He brought his skills to learn with him, not the baggage of the familiarity of home. A few of you, sometime in freshmen year, said something to the effect “That’s not the way we did that in grammar school.” You were told that you were no longer in grammar school. You all have the skills to be effective learners. You did not necessarily use them all the time, but you have them. I have seen your intellectual growth and your openness to different people and ideas. Be confident of your skills when you start college, but avoid too much baggage. Oratory was a great experience, but you are moving on to a different level. Socrates and Odysseus are good models of how to learn and how to be an effective learner for life. Both were aware that they did not know everything and that different does
not necessarily equal bad or wrong. A final personal note. From alumni contact I know that each of the twenty-seven classes I have had the pleasure of teaching at Oratory wants to think that they have merited all possible superlatives – funniest, smartest, most annoying, most disrespectful, etc. I can say one thing for all of them. For teenagers Oratory students are amongst the most accepting of differences. You actually seem to enjoy diversity. That makes it very possible for you to learn and grow, not only when it is expected or measured, but at all times. I will conclude with a directive that stereotypes myself – perhaps . Carpe diem - you know what that means – but I will add do so Singulari tuo modo - in your own unique manner. God bless you.
‘Steve Fava was Oratory’
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Kevin Canessa Jr. | Former Faculty | 2003-2005 | Fellow St. Peter’s Prep Alum
very single memory I have of Steven Fava is a good memory. I tried to think for a second if there was ever something that happened that I’d rather not remember — and there wasn’t a thing. It’s because the man just brought joy to the lives of everyone he knew. I first knew of Steve Fava in the summer of 2003. My dear friend, and Steve’s former Jesuit friend, Tony Azzarto, S.J., when he found I was going to Oratory to be on the faculty, told me to look up Steve Fava. I never had to. That summer, I was doing a study skills course in the old library. One day, flanked by about 10 alums, in walks Fava, and he introduced himself to me immediately. And from that moment on, he treated me as an equal … not the way “newbies” are often treated by veteran teachers. We instantly became friends. And my life was made better because of him. There are few people in this world who caused me to laugh as much as he did. Sometimes, he didn’t even need to say a word, and he’d have me in pain from laughing so hard. There were times I’d sit in on his English 9 classes because I knew something entertaining would happen. He always saw the laptops at Oratory as a blessing and a curse. The machines as he’d call them. While they were surely a great asset, he hated it when people would go on AIM (yes, AIM) or other websites while he was lecturing. And yet scores of teens did everything they could to ensure he knew they were on sites they weren’t supposed to be on. And he’d yell. And scream. And be pissed for 4 seconds. And then, it was back to business as usual. I could sit here all night and recall countless experiences I had with Steve. But it would just take too long. What I can say is he made my short stay at Oratory two of the best years of my life. Whenever I needed someone to lament to, he was there. Whenever I needed a laugh, he was there. When-
COMMENCEMENT 2005 — From left, Canessa, Matt Farley ’05, Augie Alvarez ’05, Steve Stockl ’05 and Fava, outside Memorial Hall at St. Teresa’s Church, Summit. ever I took a smoke break … he was obviously there. It’s impossible not to think of the NY Times Crossword Puzzle and not think of Steve. It’s impossible not to think of England, and not think of Steve. It’s impossible not to think of Vicki Candon, and not think of Steve, too. It’s impossible not to think of Oratory Prep — and not think of Steve. Because Oratory Prep isn’t the Bain Academic Building. It’s not the whiteboards or Smartboards. It’s not the athletic fields. It’s not “the House.” It’s not baseball games or basketball games. Oratory Prep is what it is because of the people there. So many have come and gone, but when he entered the doors for the first time in 1980, he probably had no idea what an institution he’d become. Steve Fava is and will always be the epitome of Oratory Prep. He was a man who loved to learn. A man who loved his students. A man who loved to share knowledge. A man
who loved England. Steve Fava is, was and always be simply the first thought that comes to mind for generation of men who recall their days at the school. I am so sad because a dear friend is gone. I am more sad there will be young men who never knew Oratory with him. But I know one thing for sure — his mom and dad got an earful when he arrived in Heaven. And I bet he sought out the Queen Mum right away too. Our world has lost a gem, but Heaven is now a better place. Because Steve Fava is there. Rest in peace, my friend and brother. I will miss you more than I can say in words.
God save our gracious Queen! Long live our noble Queen! God save The Queen! Send her victorious, Happy and glorious, Long to reign over us: God save The Queen! — The National Anthem of the UK
The Oratory Prep Mission Statement THE MISSION OF ORATORY PREPARATORY School is to develop young men of faith, intellect, and character through an exceptional college preparatory program rooted in the Roman Catholic tradition. In a spirit of cooperation and collaboration, we prepare them for life beyond the classroom by focusing on the abilities of each individual in order to graduate young men of action who will contribute positively to our communities, Church, nation, and world.
A Jack of All Trades
Positions Fava held during his tenure at Oratory Prep — we probably missed some!
Arch ivist Assistant Headmaster Lit-mag Moderator Principal
Religion Teacher
English Teacher School Historian DRAMATICS Latin Teacher
Headmaster’s Cabinet
English Department Chair FRIEND & BROTHER
THE MACHINE! Fava embraced technology in his years at Oratory
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hat would a tribute to Fava be had it not included some references to “The Machines.” Oh did Steve ever love — and despise — “The Machines,” or, as the rest of the modern world called them ... laptops. He loved being able to use technology in the classroom, but he HATED when his students would go on the laptops when they weren’t supposed to ... and let’s face it, that happened a few times (each day). But the truth is, unlike many veteran teachers, Fava embraced technology. He truly did enjoy the laptops, the Smartboards, Edline and all the other things that were integrated into the classroom over the years. Thing is, he just never knew what to call any of it!
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e estimated that this photo was taken sometime around 1975 or perhaps a little thereafter whilst Steve was a member of the Society of Jesus (the Jesuits). After graduating from St. Peter’s Prep in 1969, Steve went directly to the Novitiate, the earliest stages of Jesuit formation, where he completed his undergraduate studies. Thanks for sharing this, Jack Vander Meulen!
A LIFETIME EDUCATOR
Though few realize it, Fava actually taught at 2 schools that weren’t Oratory
Fava taught at Regis High School, New York City, from 1977-1979 and then at St. Peter’s Prep, Jersey City (his alma mater) during the 1979-1980 school year. After leaving the Jesuits, he arrived at Oratory and remained for 34 years. Oratory was his one and only post-Jesuits interview.
Fava’s love for ‘Law & Order,’ ‘The Simpsons’ and Yankees Baseball was matched by little else
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f you were one of the people who called Steve Fava at night, chances are in the background, you’d be able to hear, from his TV (and did he ever always keep that TV at the highest-possible volume) an episode of “Law & Order,” “The Simpsons” or a Yankees Game with Michael Kay’s voice blaring. Perhaps the funniest aspect of the TV shows he loved was that he rarely, if ever, actually paid attention to what was happening in the shows, because he was usually doing three other things at the same time: Perhaps sipping on an espresso, talking on the phone, grading papers or a host of other possibilities.
But did he ever love Lenny Briscoe’s character on “Law & Order,” as portrayed by Jerry Orbach. And did he ever love to quote from “The Simpsons.” Maybe he really was paying attention after all!
The OP Crosswo I
t really didn’t m gym at 3:30 p.m At some point daily Crossword P Or you’d find st Fava. (Brother Robert when they were d What few knew cheap because he copies he would d So why did he d else, Fava wanted best-possible voc Sure, there were veloped vocabula And of course, t at the head of the to spend time wit That’s the kind seen with the tea hope someone ke Though it’ll nev
ord Puzzle Society
matter what time of the day it was. It could be at 7:30 a.m. in the Oratory Prep cafeteria. The m. The House at noon. The faculty room at 11 a.m. t in the day, as you walked the halls of Oratory Prep, you’d see a copy of The New York Times Puzzle somewhere. tudents trying their best to complete it — sometimes sitting right at the faculty table with
t never liked when students sat at the faculty table, but the faculty never minded it really doing the puzzle). is that Fava spent his own money to subscribe to the printable version — and it wasn’t e made so many copies of it each day (and was honest when the Times asked how many disseminate to the student body). do this every single day for as long as he did? Well, as a teacher of English before all d every student — whether he was in the seventh-grade or the 12th-grade, to have the cabulary. re vocab words in all English classes, but the New York Times’ crossword puzzles deary like very little else could ... especially as it got later on in the week. there was this crew seen here, PJ Doyle, ’07, to Fava’s right, and Doug Zambon, ’07, e table, who, without fail, were there every morning to work on the puzzle — and th Fava. of man he was. Students wanted to sit with him. What kids want to sit and be achers? Fava’s kids did. And they never wavered from that desire. We can only eeps the puzzle tradition going in September 2014. ver be the same again.
The Society of Jesus: fava, s.j. F
rom 1969 to 1980, Steve Fava was Steven R. Fava, S.J., as a member of the Society of Jesus, the Jesuits. Here are some photos of evidence that he was, indeed, a Jesuit, for nearly 11 years. Note the final photo at the bottom right. Steve didn’t just teach with Donna Derise at Oratory. He taught with her when she was Donna Pica, one of the first-ever women teachers at St. Peter’s Prep, as well.
Steve was once much younger ...
First Holy Communion Circa 1959
Left, Steve in the 9th-grade at Prep. Middle, Steve on the Student Council, senior year, at St. Peter’s. Right, Steve’s senior portrait from the 1969 St. Peter’s Prep ‘Petrean’ (yearbook).
Playing the accordian? Who ever knew?
The 1989 ‘Aries’ — The Ye Dedicated to a man who
earbook at Oratory Prep o dedicated his life to OP
‘Recollections of his class ... are why I chose to go to the school’
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James Kukucka, ’09
t has taken me a while to process this news as it is difficult to come to terms with the fact that a man I associate in my head with the phrase “Oratory Prep” has passed. I only had the privilege of having one class with Mr. Fava, English 9 Honors, I believe, but I knew him way before that. Recollections of his class after my pre-matriculation visit to Oratory are why I chose to go to the school. He just exuded a wealth of knowledge, conviction and love of his subject that I had rarely seen in a teacher. He was one of the first teachers I went out of my way in 7th grade to meet. Throughout my high school years he was always available to talk for whatever reason, academic or otherwise, and no matter what I always left his classroom happier than when I walked into it. Most of my fondest memories of the school involve Mr. Fava in some way, shape or form. Thank you Mr. Fava, for being an inspiration to me and to every single student who walks through the doors of Oratory Prep. I think the outpouring of memories in this group is but a small testament to the impact Mr. Fava has had on generations of men’s lives. I think I speak for anybody in this group that we are all better for having known and having been taught by him. Rest in Peace, Steven Fava.
A fascination with the Crown
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h did Fava ever have a fascination with the Crown of England. He was, as they call them, an “Anglophile,” perhaps born improperly in the United States in North Bergen, N.J., when he should have been born somewhere in the United Kingdom — most notably in England. Whenever Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth would appear on the “telly,” Steve would stop whatever it was he was doing — and focus completely on the Queen. He’d often travel to England, too — and whenever there were Oratory students studying there, he’d always make a point of it
to meet them for some sort of British meal at one of London’s finest restaurants. And he’d always pick up the tab, too. When the Queen Mum died, Steve admitted to going into “mourning” over her loss. So somehow, he’s likely sipping on a drink with her now in Heaven.
There is much irony in this 1980 photo of Fava with Mike Gray. At St. Peter’s Prep, Mike was what would be known as a legend. Alums would flock back to St. Peter’s and always visit Mike. Does that sound remotely familiar?
‘... the wisest of men i have ever had the honor of knowing’
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enry David Thoreau wrote, “I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived. I did not wish to live what was not life, living is so dear; nor did I wish to practise resignation, unless it was quite necessary. I wanted to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life…” No man I have known has exemplified this as Steve Fava did. He loved his Poconos properties — first Eagle Lake, then Lake Ariel, because it was his time to withdraw back to the nature that he loved. For all his fascination with technology — always with the new “machines” — he saw them as a means to an end, a way to watch what was happening at the Cornell Ornithological Society, a way to keep in touch with nature. It was no accident that he did not give up the Poconos until he moved from the center of Summit, first to the Villas, and then to the apartment overlooking Briant Park and the brook and animals he watched from this balcony. For 20 years, Steve was a part of my life, first as a teacher, then as a mentor and dear friend. He never ceased to be a teacher to me — he was defined by his curiosity and his desire to share his knowledge. Socrates taught that the wise
‘More than a dozen years after I graduated Oratory I was still learning from Steve.’ man knew the limits of his knowledge. By that measure, Steve was one of the wisest men I have ever had the honor of knowing. He exemplified the Socratic belief — never did he cease to seek to expand what he knew. No topic was verboten — he knew what he knew and believed, but was always willing to both defend and question it. Never did he reject new knowledge because it conflicted with his conceptions. More than a dozen years after I graduated Oratory I was still learning from Steve. “Because I love teaching. I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else,” Robin Williams said in Dead Poets Society — a film, like “The History Boys,” to which Steve was often compared. Every time I had dinner with him, every time we spoke on the phone, I came away a wiser man. Without Steve, I would not be the man I am today. Steve was a consummate educator, a dedicated learner, a compassionate man, and a great friend. The world is poorer for
Chris Daly Class of 2001 his passing. I’m sure he would have some trenchant quote from Shakespeare or Jonathan Swift about all the fuss that has been made for him — as he was also a man of great humility — but I cannot find one more fitting than this from another of his favorites _ Oscar Wilde. “Death must be so beautiful. To lie in the soft brown earth, with the grasses waving above one’s head, and listen to silence. To have no yesterday, and no to-morrow. To forget time, to forget life, to be at peace. You can help me. You can open for me the portals of death’s house, for love is always with you, and love is stronger than death is.” Goodbye Steve, you were the greatest of men and I will miss you for the rest of my life.
‘The heavens ope
en up in sorrow’
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n the day many gathered to pay respects to Steve Fava, something incredible greeted mourners — intense rain. It was as if those in Heaven were sad for those who would no longer have Steve with them on this earth — and also tears of joy that he was with them now in eternal life and eternal glory. As Steve’s dear friend, Vincent Chiumento, said as he prepared to enter Oratory for Steve’s viewing, “The heavens open up in sorrow as we pay our respects to Steven Fava.” It couldn’t have been said more simply or more beautifully. And this building — one that holds so many dear memories — will always be the place we met our dear friend and brother, Steven, and it will always hold a special place in our hearts for that reason — and so many others.
Steve’s
favourite peopl
Here are a few of Steve’s f people. Counter-clockwise Daly and Vince Chiumento; New Hope Lodge in the Wo ven; Steve had a great affe In the background is Steve’ enue, Summit, N.J.
le, places
favourite things, places and from top left, Kings; Chris ; Marco Polo in Summit; the oods, New Hope, Pa.; The Raection for ducks and swans. ’s old residence, Summit Av-
&
things
Indeed, there was more to Steve Fava’s li
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hat can I say further except my friend and confident of the last 44 years is dead and buried? But all that Steve Fava was will live in the hearts and lives of his friends, family, colleagues and most importantly, the students at Oratory Prep in Summit, N.J. Although he spent a good part of his 63 years nurturing and enlightening the students for the last 34 years, there was more to Steve than just his life at Oratory. In many ways he was the brother I never had. I met Steve when I visited the Jesuit Novitiate in Syracuse, N.Y. It was his first year as a novice (he was called a primi then) and he and Michael Frasch, his very close friend in the Jesuits at the time, took me under their wing that weekend. I applied to the Society of Jesus, but was asked to attend Fordham University for a year before I entered. After I graduated high school, I met Steve when he was working in the Higher Achievement Program (HAP) at St. Peter’s Prep under the direction of Fr. John Browning, S.J., a dear and trusted guide for Steve. Even at the age of 20, Steve enjoyed being with students. Now the many Jesuits and lay teachers at St. Peter’s Prep gave Steve a wonderful example of a caring and vibrant educator. That education began Steve’s growth as a true person. He began the journey according to Socrates to know thyself. After I entered the Jesuits, Steve continued to be a guide for me. He often visited the novitiate while I was there and soon I joined him and Michael Frasch at Murray-Weigel Hall, the residence at Fordham University for the next phase of our Jesuit formation. Steve was guest master and in charge of arranging many of the parties we celebrated within the community. He has the trust and respect of our Rector, Fr. Joe Brown, S.J., who previously was Steve’s principal at St. Peter’s Prep. Steve was known on the Fordham campus and often held court at a dive bar across Fordham Road. During his summers Steve worked with Saul Alin-
sky, the founder of community organizing. When not doing that, he served as Guest Master at the Fordham Jesuit’s get-away in Westchester. He loved helping the cook Marie prepare wonderful feasts for his Jesuit brothers. He guided me to be at peace with myself and grow in the love of God and the Society. Upon graduation with his discipline in English and philosophy, Steve was assigned for his next stage to Regis High School. Here his vocation as a teacher began. During the week he worked late into the night preparing his classes. Often, I would drive from Fordham to meet him and Fr. Bob Dahlke, S.J., who lived in the Jesuit Residence and grew to be Steve’s dearest friend throughout his life. We would visit a piano bar called Brandy’s when Saturday night‘s venue was a great guitar player and singer. Often, Hank and Edie, his parents, would join us. The revelry went to the early-morning hours. During this time, there were many Sundays when Steve would join me and other Jesuits when we visited my family for Sunday gravy and meatballs. Our Jesuit lives mirrored each other’s. I went to teach English in Buffalo while Steve preceded me at Regis. We both grew to love teaching and mentored many of our students not only in the classroom but as with excursions
to plays. I decided to leave the Society and Steve decided to take a leave of absence. I moved to Bayonne, N.J., to teach at Marist High School, and a year later, Steve found an apartment in Jersey City and began his illustrious career at Oratory Prep. I eventually left teaching, but Steve truly saw his life as a teacher as a true vocation. Friday nights and many New Year’s Eves were spent at D’Asti’s on Route 22 where he met Robert and Dan. We often went into the Village and until he purchased his place at Eagle Lake, many weekends were spent in New Hope, Pa. So many escapades and dinners were spent at his home. How many times did he have to use knife and fork with the pizza or cut his bacon and sausage into small pieces? And of course, there was the vodka tonic (vodka martini three olives after Labor Day), the red wine and then the bran-
ife than what happened at Oratory Prep
dy followed by scotch and water. If he didn’t finish the scotch, it went into the refrig for the next night. He and Fr. Bob enjoyed many trips around the United States and Europe. Two of his memorable trips were Florence with his mother and Aunt Anna and Greece with Bob. He perfected his driving with a stick shift that summer in Greece. A few summers were spent at Notre Dame and he returned one summer to Oxford. Steve was a true Anglophile. The Queen’s Royal Flag still hangs in his apartment along with memorabilia of the Queen, the Queen Mum and Prince William. One of favorite photographs was Keaton’s “Three Mourning Queens.” It was great to know another person would watch weddings, funerals and the opening of Parliament early in the morning, too. How my heart grieves for myself and
colleagues and friends. I will miss Standing Rib Roast and Yorkshire pudding in the heat of August or his famous lasagna and brasiole. Marco Polo and the Summit diner may have to close because he is now dining at the heavenly banquet. We used to say his mom Edie and my mother Theresa were looking down on us when we shopped whether for food at Kings or the Short Hills Mall. I will miss our annual review of Oratory’s yearbook when Steve would regale me with stories of his former students. I will miss taking two bottles of wine from his wine collection or losing some of mine when he came over. I will miss the curmudgeon side and our theological and politically loud discussions. I will miss his loving bitchiness and those early AM visits to White Castle. Steve was truly part of the very soul of Oratory Prep. We often talked about the Rainbow Coalition or the Oscar Wilde Gang whom he mentored at the school. These 10% needed a confidant and guide in their lives and Steve was there. He helped them face their fears as he helped me so many years ago. I am now so honored to have a painting by Brian Belott of Oscar Wilde and Bosey in my home. It truly reminds me of Steve. His stu-
Vince Chiumento Steve’s oldest friend dents truly loved him. We truly loved him. Yes, Steve was great at academics and his students went on to many prestigious universities. He and Vicki helped guide them to be the best they could be. Yet, that was only a small part of Steve Fava. Chris Daly wrote so eloquently about his relationship with Steve. The Ignatian spirit that was imbedded within him those many years ago during his Thirty Day Retreat, never diminished. He led students not only to know thyself but to do things for the greater glory of God (AMDG). He helped me and his friends and all he met to see God in all things. We are better for Steve Fava in our lives. He loved his cousins and loved making spinach pie at Easter with Joannie. He helped Ken, his oldest friend from his St. Peter’s days, during his rough times and made sure his godchild became alum of Oratory. He was proud his Katherine. Chris Daly was such a good friend to Steve and wrote so eloquently about him. The heavens shine brighter with a new star. Steve enjoyed the love of God and brought me and others to know that too. We can honor our friend, our brother, our colleague t by accepting all people with God’s infinite love. God created us all in his image for nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow — not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. We can embrace all and live in that spirit Steve did when he learned the prayer we all did many years ago as we became a part of the Jesuit family. Take Lord, and receive all my liberty, my memory, my understanding, and my entire will, all that I have and possess. Thou hast given all to me. To Thee, O lord, I return it. All is Thine, dispose of it wholly according to Thy will. Give me Thy love and thy grace, for this is sufficient for me.
‘I wasn’t the best student while at Oratory ... but Fava treated all of his students with the same mature attitude and demeanor, regardless of their academic standing’ Chris Belenski, ’06
I
was never the best student while at Oratory. I spent my four years dancing on the line of academic ineligibility due to grades. Some faculty members let their frustrations play into our daily interactions because of this. When I would step into a class where I wasn’t doing well (which happened a lot), I would hang my head and try to fly under the radar to avoid any negative repercussions from failing a test or forgetting a homework assignment. I never had to worry about these undesirable encounters with Mr. Fava. He treated all of his students with the same mature attitude and demeanor; regardless of their academic standing with the school. I could always count on him to uphold the Golden Rule. I guess you could say he was the first teacher I ever had who treated me like an adult. He handed me my first Oratory detention, which was well deserved as a firm reminder I had broken the Golden Rule. Mr. Fava was undoubtedly an icon of our school. He embodied the values of what an allboys school should instill in their young men. He didn’t educate and inspire us as boys by giving into our growing pains and immaturity. Rather, he was a leader and a mentor to the men who resided at 1 Beverly Road. Far greater than any club, sport or extracurricular activity were the lessons taught to us by Steven Fava, which will echo timelessly throughout the Oratory Prep community.
Fava ‘saw you as who you are, not how you saw yourself’
I
Dan Perrine, ’07
wish I could put into words one experience with that man, but its really impossible. Seeing him on a daily basis, offering a smile, was what made the worst days at OP seem like it was just another day. There was always something about him that when he gave you that smile, he saw you as who you are — not who you saw youself as or how others saw you. At that age, you’re always unsure of how others see you and especially how you see yourself. I have never been great with words, but I
feel like you don’t truly appreciate that Fava smile until you have left OP and you have become a man. It’s amazing how much a person can impact your life without you, or HIM for that matter, ever knowing. I wish I could put into words that feeling of confidence that he’s given me as a man that he gave me when I last spoke to him five years ago.
Fava’s parents, Edith and Frank Fava Jr.
‘Farewell, my friend. This time, you got there first’
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teve and I have had a long relationship with an odd beginning. In Sept of 1965, he began his freshman year at St. Peter’s Prep in Jersey City, as I began my sophomore year. We were students together there for three years, but the odd part of the relationship is that we never knew one another. We finally met when Steve came to Oratory in 1980, and we have worked together here for 34 years. Why here, why so long, and what does it mean? One big reason for being at Oratory is that it is impossible for two guys to be here for three years, one grade level apart, and not know each other. Fr. Floyd Rotunno, our headmaster in the 1980s, began the use to the term “the Oratory family,” and Steve believed deeply in that. His students weren’t commodities to be churned out, they were younger family members. They may have annoyed and angered him from time to time, as family members do, but he loved them all the same. Steve was always a strong voice in favor of the students. He fought any attempts to limit their horizons, whether in the courses they could take of the topics they could discuss. He took the long view, considering the men that they
Jack Horan | Oratory Colleague for 34 years | Fellow St. Peter’s Prep Alum
‘Ad maiorem Dei gloriam inque hominum salutem.’ — St. Ignatius of Loyola
would become. It is heartening to see so many of those men here today to honor and remember him. Indeed, Steve would probably be embarrassed by all the fuss we are making over him now. He would shrug, wave it off, and say “don’t bother.” I’m sorry about the fuss Steve, but, as the actor John
Houseman used to say in a commercial we both enjoyed “he earned it.” As a lifelong teacher, Steve saw teaching as a vocation, not a job. He didn’t just teach students, he taught life, as all his students will attest. Let me go back again to our shared Jesuit roots with a quote from St. Ignatius Loyola that gave the Society of Jesus a motto. Steve taught and lived “ad maiorem Dei gloriam inque hominum salutem,” for the greater glory of God and the salvation of men. I can think of no higher praise to offer. Farewell, my friend, until we meet again. This time, you got there first. Jack Horan delivered these remarks at Steven’s Mass of Christian Burial, which, appropriately, was celebrated in the gym on the Oratory Prep campus. Jack is St. Peter’s Prep Class of ’68 and Steven was Prep ’69.
When the hair was real Brian Belott photos
Steven R. Fava, 63, of Springfield; was teacher at Oratory Prep for 34 years JULY 31, 2014 —
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teven Fava, 63, of Springfield, N.J., died Tuesday, July 29, 2014, at Overlook Medical Center, Summit,
N.J.
Funeral Liturgy will be at 10 a.m. Saturday, Aug. 2, at Oratory Preparatory School, One Beverly Rd., Summit, N.J., followed by interment at St. Teresa of Avila Cemetery, Summit. Visitation is on Friday, Aug. 1, from 4 to 7 p.m. at Oratory Preparatory School. Bizub-Quinlan Funeral Home, Clifton, N.J., is in charge of arrangements. Visit www.bizub.com for driving directions or online condolences. Mr. Fava was a foreign language teacher on the faculty of Oratory Preparatory School in Summit, where he was affiliated since 1980. He earned his bachelor’s degree in English and philosophy from Fordham University and his master’s degree from the University of Notre Dame in English and theology. In 2000, he was chosen as the Newark Archdiocese’s “Teacher of the Year” for recognition by students as their most influ-
ential teacher. Prior to coming to Oratory Prep, he taught at Regis High School and St. Peter’s Prep (while a member of the Society of Jesus, the Jesuits). Over the course of his 34 years of dedicated service, he taught in multiple disciplines (including English and theology), serving most recently in his area of expertise as a Latin teacher. (He was also the school’s assistant headmaster and principal during his time at Oratory). He was able to bring his love of history and literature to his Latin classes, and his vast knowledge in these areas consistently dazzled his many students — as well as making the daily crosswords from The New York Times a feasible challenge. His desire to share his interests (like the crossword puzzles) and knowledge with his students, and to have them leave Oratory as cultured, erudite young men, was perhaps his greatest gift as an educator. His tenure at Oratory was so extensive that he taught the sons of many of his own former students, which he commented on many times as a source of
OBITUARY
pride. Steve so loved Oratory that he devoted countless hours to the organization and preservation of the school’s historical archives, and was the de facto historian of Oratory Prep. He was truly an institution at the school. Mr. Fava was predeceased by his parents, Edith (nee Sacco) and Frank J. Fava Jr. He is survived by his two cousins, Joan Pastorino and Katherine Longo. In lieu of flowers, please consider a contribution to Oratory Preparatory School, One Beverly Road., Summit, N.J. 07901.
A celebration His wake and funeral Mass
of Steve’s Life
Tony Azzarto, S.J., the alumni chaplain at St. Peter’s Prep, was a concelebrant of Steve’s Mass of Christian Burial. Tony and Steve were colleagues, and Tony was Steve’s teacher as a Jesuit scholastic, at Prep.
Walter Crum, Oratory’s director of development & alumni relations, read a remembrance that was written by former Oratory faculty member and Steve’s dear friend, Victoria J. Candon.
Bob Dahlke, S.J., is one of Steve’s oldest friends, and was the celebrant at his Mass of Christian Burial. They came to know each other when Steve was a member of the Society of Jesus (Jesuits) in the 1970s.
This poster of remembrance was on display during Steve’s wake and funeral Mass. It includes many photos of Steven taken during his 34 years of service to the Oratory Prep Community.
Forever With Us
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his final photo came to us courtesy of Chris Pope, Oratory Prep Class of 2014. It is a reminder, of sorts, that wherever we go in our lives, whether it’s to the Poconos of Pennsylvania, the Jersey Shore, the halls of Oratory Prep, St. Peter’s Prep or Regis High School, or the basketball courts, Steven Raymond Fava will live on with us, in spirit, forever. There has never been a man like him before, and there will never be another like him. So many of us have been touched by his life. And every single one of us is better off because Steve was our friend. We will miss you, ole chap — but we will never, ever forget you. Ever.
Steven Raymond Fava
24 May 1951 - 29 July 2014
This tribute, while complete for now, will always remain ‘open’ for additional remarks, photos, remembrances, stories, tales, etc., about Steven R. Fava. If you have anything you’d like to see included in this, please send those items to kevincanessa@gmail.com, and this will be updated and republished. In the interim, please be sure to circulate this to those who might not have access to Facebook and/or those who might not know of its existence.