Kansas Monks - Summer 2020

Abbot Ralph Koehler sixth abbot of st. benedict’s abbey

1929-2020

St. Benedict’s Abbey Monastic Horarium

Ple a se join u s for Ma ss or P rayer – here or in your ow n home!

Due to COVID-19 St. Benedict’s Abbey is in a state of lockdown Check our website for updates, we look forward to praying with you in person again soon!

Sunday Vigils (Office of Readings) - 6:30 AM Lauds (Morning Prayer) - 6:45 AM Mass - 10:00 AM Midday Prayer - 12:05 PM Vespers (Evening Prayer) - 5:00 PM Compline (Night Prayer) - 7:30 PM Monday-Saturday Vigils - 5:45 AM Lauds - 6:05 AM Midday Prayer - 11:45 AM Mass - 12:10 PM Vespers Mon-Fri - 5:00 PM Vespers Saturday - 5:45 PM Compline - 7:30 PM Holy Hour for Vocations with Compline Saturday - 7:00 PM

Contents 4 - From the Abbot

Abbot James offers his thoughts to help us embrace reality over the virtual.

6 - The Divine Office

For thousands of years the Church has been united in one voice, praying the Liturgy of the Hours each day – we explore this ancient tradition.

10 - Abbot Ralph

We look back on the life and service of our sixth Father in Christ, Abbot Ralph Koehler, who passed in March.

12 - Saying “Yes”

Br. Karel reflects on professing solemn vows, making a lifelong commitment to monastic life.

14 - His Embrace

Br. Angelus looks back on his journey to the Abbey.

16 - Unexpected Desire

Br. Maximilian Mary found something he did not expect – a desire for celibacy.

18 - From the Novitiate

Br. Jean-Marie and Br. Vladimir share about their first days in the Abbey.

Help us bring Christ to the world.

Stability is central to the life of the monk – this vow keeps us rooted in this place and reminds us that, no matter where we are, our spirituality flows from St. Benedict’s Abbey. Our very lives are sustained by the perpetual prayer of the Abbey.

One of our most important works is sharing the love of Christ with all those whom we serve – you can partner with us to bring Christ to the world by becoming a Partner in Stability. Your monthly support is critical to making our prayer and work possible.

For more information, visit our website:

K A N S A S M O N K S . O R G / S TA B I L I T Y

19 - The Paschal Candle

Br. Karel reflects on the decoration of the Abbey’s Paschal Candle.

20 - All my Desires

How we respond to our ache for Christ during the pandemic.

22 - Silence

Br. Leven reflects on how God speaks to us in silence.

24 - Communion

Fr. Meinrad discusses that which binds us together.

26 - The Cross

If Christ had a trophy case, his Cross would be front and center – Fr. Simon discusses this and more.

28 - The Resurrection

Fr. Jay explains how our very lives are part of salvation

30 - The Abbot’s Table

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We discuss the cancelation of the 2020 Abbot’s Table, our double $200,000 challenge, and more.

th e jo u r n e y What time is it?

In this time of pandemic it has been easy to lose track of time – to lose all sense of when we are. At a time when all seems the same, (indeed, here in the monastery, the only tangible reminder that Sunday has arrived is the change in the timing of our liturugies) when each day runs into the next in this quasi-homogenous manner, we can reflect on the very nature of time itself.

As we planned to highlight at the Abbot’s Table, time is like a river, and we are streaming within it. If we are caught as boats in the current, how do we navigate these waters? What exists at the end of this river?

Christ, fully divine, took on our humanity and dove headlong into this current. While we are, in a sense, caught, he is there, all we need do is welcome him into our boats. No sooner than we are with him, we suddenly find that he has arrived with a rudder, oars, and all that we need to guide us safely on our way. And there are a great many paths, tributaries that we may wind down on the path to the end: some turbulent, some serene, but with Christ as our guide we know that he will remain ever at our side until that end.

This river – this inexorable journey toward the Father – is not an easy path to travel, but in taking on our humanity, God was reaching into time to pull us to himself. Each Mass, each liturgy, is an invitation to step outside of the stream of time – to encounter his divine nature – to hear the Lord just as those who witnessed Christ’s baptism heard the Word of God from beyond time, “this is my beloved Son, with whom I am well pleased.”

It is our hope that in these pages you may encounter Christ in a new way – that in his gaze the true value of time is revealed.

BECAUSE OF YOUR LITTLE FAITH. AMEN, I SAY TO YOU, IF YOU HAVE FAITH THE SIZE OF A MUSTARD SEED, YOU WILL SAY TO THIS MOUNTAIN, ‘MOVE FROM HERE TO THERE,’ AND IT WILL MOVE. NOTHING WILL BE IMPOSSIBLE FOR YOU. - MATTHEW 17:20 Summer 2020

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F r om the A bb ot

Virtual Reality

It has been my experience that when we witness a crisis, or world event, or social distress, we turn to describe what is being experienced. Journalists, television personalities, bloggers, and even monks in monasteries grab onto catchwords that rise out of the discussion of our experience.

The word, it seems to me, that we have been tossing about with much regularity these days of COVID-19, is the word “virtual.” We have virtual Masses, virtual classrooms, virtual meetings, virtual personal interactions, virtual shopping, virtual fundraisers, virtual marathons, virtual-and-thelist-goes-on – most of these are gifts during these difficult times, and some are grace-filled.

a Triduum and Easter like none other we had experienced.

First and foremost, because we were being called to encounter each other in new and different ways, serving each other in profound ways, reaching out to others in ways that might be foreign to what we know. Whether we are in “lockdown,” or bound by a stay-at-home order, or our lives return to something resembling “normal,” we will always be called to encounter the person of Jesus Christ – the human and divine Christ – always in new and exceptional ways; for the one we so earnestly seek is the same Lord and Savior, and we are the same Body of Christ, everywhere called into an encounter with him.

What we are experiencing in these “virtual realities” has been necessary for this time of pandemic. However, virtual can never replace reality, or at least we need to consider the consequences when it does. This is not the beginning of an Orwellian commentary on technology, but rather a lead-in to our monastic community’s experience of this time of “stay-at-home,” and how we tried to allow others to encounter our experience in reality in their homes during the Holy Triduum, Easter Sunday, and beyond. And, “in reality,” our experience is the encounter with Jesus Christ, who is the same yesterday, today, and forever.

That Body of Christ has never made more sense to me than precisely in times like these – times in which the support we provide each other, inside and outside the monastery, highlights the beauty of our lives, the beauty of the life of the Church, and the beauty of the Christian faith we all share. Know that we continue to pray for you each and every day – the constant in our lives – working to reach out to you in new ways as we are doing through technology.

At our weekly Tuesday evening community meeting the day before the stay-at-home order went into effect for the State of Kansas in March, from which we went into “lockdown” at the monastery, I offered to my brothers that it would be

When it became painfully obvious that the word “cancellation” would be used in these times as much as “virtual,” we, as a community of monks, had to think differently. We were challenged by reality to continue to live our lives together as monks; however, we have been called in new ways to share that unity with others. It was in this “new reality” that Fr. Jay Kythe, our Retreat Master,

How could we not share the privilege we continue to have during this time? While it is provided through tech nology, the Body is ever present, forming us in Christ Jesus.

- Abbot James Albers

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Not to us, Lord, not to us but to your name give glory because of your mercy and faithfulness.

- psalm 115:1

and Br. Angelus Atkinson, our Assistant Retreat Master – when all our retreats had been canceled through the summer – offered the idea of taking our annual Holy Week Retreat to the internet. Normally a retreat with 25-or-so Benedictine College students, Fr. Jay and Br. Angelus’ idea was not to have an “online retreat,” but to create a “retreat-in-place” by using the internet. They wanted to create an environment that would be as if we had been personally invited into the retreatants’ homes, into the “reality” of their encounter with Christ. The idea was to help the retreatants create an environment in their own homes, an atmosphere of retreat, so that they could encounter their Lord and Savior in a real way, the One who suffered, died, and rose for them.

It was really this type of experience for many people, including myself. This was made possible because, wherever we were [more than 3,000 participants in over 1,450 households joined us from six continents], the truest reality of encounter was made present, not by means of any virtual retreat conference, or online chat session, or any virtual meetings on Zoom, but by means of the individual parts of the Body of Christ, sharing together as the One Body, putting their trust in God, in the Triune God who took on human flesh, humbling himself, taking on the ultimate image of a servant, the form of a slave. The retreatants were able to make themselves vulnerable to a Savior who would suffer all our human weaknesses but sin, and who would take on that sin, our sin, so that it would ravage his body… that we might live.

Throughout our experience of this pandemic – however it all eventually plays out – we can be sure that God will use each of us and our sacrifices to bring about greater things in his kingdom. We know, for certain, that love will always conquer death. Whether we call these times a crisis, a pandemic, difficult, unprecedented, unique, there is a word given to us which sums up our experience and our encounter. If we allow the virtues, all the gifts of the Holy Spirit, to work through us, especially those virtues of Faith, Hope, and Love, this time has the possibility to be truly a moment of grace.

Bringing The Mass to the multitude As we have been cut off and cloistered, radically changing our (and everyone’s) lives, one great blessing has been witnessing the tremendous outpouring of faith in our social media channels.

We have sought to join in with the faithful by sharing Mass and more with the world. Our brothers share their thoughts on participating in this new new evanglization: Br. Jerome Simpson - Mass & Retreat Video Producer I first started helping with streaming the Mass and events when I saw a confrere overwhelmed; with so much on his plate, I just wanted to help out to allow him to fulfill his other roles in the Liturgies.

When I started recognizing the names of different people watching the Mass and taking part in the retreat, it started to sink in that this was something more. Knowing that people were cut off from their faith communities made me want to work hard and learn all I could to help provide the next best thing to being here with us. Easter is an important time to experience a revitalization of faith for me, and I feel blessed to help others enter into that with me.

It felt empty in the Abbey without our usual friends and students present, but seeing the names on the computer screen and hearing the homilies about being a united faith community reminded me how big the Church is.

Br. Angelus Atkinson - Assistant Retreat Master Each day, each challenge of the retreat was new – we had to live it a day (or an hour) at a time – but what was clear throughout was that we were simply responding to a need in ourselves and others, that we were participating in the work of an Other, from beginning to end. So it was a great joy to be a part of.

Fr. Meinrad Miller - Schola Master & Oblate Director I have enjoyed being able to share my Masses and retreat conference with others. These days of pandemic are trying times for so many of our family, friends and oblates, as there is so much uncertainty. Being able to share our faith reminds us that even in these days, God is with us and never abandons his people.

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What unites us?

During this time of division – social distancing and lack of Masses – this question has been at the forefront of our minds. But we need only look back to the Church in her infancy to know that this time of separation is indeed a small challenge in the history of our Catholic faith. Those first followers of Jesus sought ways to unify themselves through a bond of prayer – for centuries the Jewish people had stopped throughout the day to pray, to unite themselves to one another and to God. We see this continued in the Acts of the Apostles and onward, and those earliest followers of Jesus began to form a new manner of prayer; thus, the Divine Office, today known as the Liturgy of the Hours, was born.

This prayer is constant. As you read this, somewhere in the world, a Liturgy is happening. Right now. This is a reminder both of the immensity of the world, and of the closeness that God desires for each of us. Whenever you pray, you are united to the w hole Body of Christ – together we can pray with and for one another, sanctifying our own lives and the world as a whole.

Whether you are praying the Psalms with your spouse, your whole family, a roommate, or by yourself, St. Benedict wants you to know that you are not alone. There is no such thing as a private recitation of the Office. When we pray, we pray as the whole Church – we, the Church Suffering, together with the angels and saints, with Jesus Christ as our head, are praising the divine presence of God who is always before us.

The Liturgy of the Hours has changed throughout the centuries to suit the needs of the day. This guide offers a broad overview of what the Liturgy of the Hours is, but, really, the best way to learn it is to start praying.

If you’ve never prayed this way before, we recommend starting with a recording of Vespers on our Youtube channel: youtube.com/kansasmonks Further, there are great resources online like Divineoffice.org or the iBreviary app for iPhone or Android th at are great resources.

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THE HOURS OF PRAYER The Liturgy of the Hours is broken into 5 principle parts; each of these sprinkled throughout the day is an invitation to return to God and rest in him. St. Benedict offered a special phrase for this: Opus Dei – the Work of God. It is in this work that we seek to unite ourselves to the whole Church to offer thanks and praise to him who gives us life. While St. Benedict called his own Rule a “little rule for beginners” we hope that this guide will serve as an even smaller set of suggestions to send you on your way.

Vigils

of f ice of r ea din gs In his Rule, St. Benedict encourages us to sleep clothed with a lamp burning, that we might be ever-prepared to rise and praise God. We begin our day with Vigils with the invitatory “Lord, open my lips and my mouth shall declare your praise.” In the monastery this is to be our first utterance – keeping ever silent until we can gather together to pray. We enter into this, the longest hour of prayer, with a spirit of hope. We associate this hour with Christ on Holy Thursday, keeping vigil in the garden, meditating on what is to come.

Lauds

mor ning pr a y er With Lauds we enter into a spirit of praise, offering this new day to our Father in Heaven. St. Benedict dedicated two chapters of his Rule on the praying of Lauds, exhorting us to pray Psalm 67, “May the peoples praise you, O God!” and Psalm 51 “Have mercy on me, God... and from my sin cleanse me.” In these prayers we are prepared for the day as we have praised God and begged for his mercy. Unique to this hour is the Benedictus, the prayer of Zechariah after the birth of John the Baptist – that we may act as John did and “go before the Lord to prepare his ways.” (Luke 1:76)

Midday Prayer

t erc e, s ext , none

Midday prayer once occupied three seperate hours, interspersed throughout the day. Today, they are combined into a single Hour, the shortest of the day consisting of three Psalms, a hymn, and a short reading. It is in this prayer that we bring ourselves back to God to combat our acedia. Though it is short, it is a critical reset, to bend our minds, hearts, and wills back to the Father, that we may continue to serve him as we return to our work; for just as St. Benedict writes in the Rule, “We believe the divine presence is everywhere.” (RB 19:1)

Vespers

evening pr a y e r It starts with a spark, and rises – we begin Vespers singing, “Let my prayer rise like incense before you, O Lord!” In the hymn we meditate on this day of creation and offer our first prayers for protection during the coming night. At the apex of our prayer, the Magnificat is recited that we may echo the fiat of Mary in our lives, “My spirit rejoices in God, my savior... for [he] has done great things for me!” (Luke 1:47,49) Just as Christ instructed “this is how you are to pray” we conclude with the Our Father, a reminder to forgive and ask for forgiveness (RB 13:13).

Compline

nig h t pr ayer

Our day comes to a close, and just as our first utterance was a prayer, so, too, do we return to our silence with another hour of prayer: Compline. It is here that we add the Confiteor to our prayer – though we seek to follow our Lord in all that we do, we recognize that we are prone to sin and must ask for his mercy. We conclude with the Canticle of Simeon, “Lord, now let your servant go in peace,” that we may go to our rest in peace, though ever watchful that we will be prepared to rise in the morning and continue to offer him praise.

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THE PARTS OF PRAYER Each Hour of prayer has a unique form, some repeating Psalms or prayers each day, and others changing, but you can always expect to find Psalms, a hymn, and a reading. A great resource for this are chapters 8-20 of the Rule of St. Benedict (this is only about 10 pages of text, a quick read). While it is easy to “go with the motions” we encourage you to consider each portion of your prayer as you go through it.

Call to Prayer The greeting can be the most important part of any conversation – as we engage the Lord we make the Sign of the Cross – it is easy to gloss over this, rendering it the prayer equivalent of tying one’s shoes – but it is a reminder that all we do is in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. “God, come to my assistance. Lord, make haste to help me.” This call to prayer is itself a call to humility, that we need our God.

Doxology The word doxology come from the Greek doxa, meaning glory, and logos, meaning the word.

Punctuating and sprinkled throughout each of the Hours, we are again reminded to offer praise to the Lord, “Glory to the Father, to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit.” During this portion of prayer we rise to our feet and bow in reverence to the Triune God.

Hymn It has been said that when you sing you pray twice. Each of the Hours of prayer contains a hymn – these songs are an intersection between the human and the divine: hymns composed and performed by us to render praise and thanksgiving to God. Often, when praying with a breviary, you may not know the melody, in which case, replace the hymn with one you know, or simply recite it.

Psalmody The psalmody is the heart of the Liturgy of the Hours – the tradition of praying the Psalms goes back millennia. Jesus himself prayed the Psalms and it is clear how much they formed his character – at the peak of his mission on the Cross the Psalms remained on his lips. These ancient prayers contain every emotion and while the words remain the same they can offer us new insights each time we pray them.

Canticle While some of the Psalms rotate in and out from day to day, the Gospel Canticle remains constant.

In the Benedictus and Magnificat, St. Luke’s Gospel perfectly encapsulates Christian prayer, and we echo the words of Mary and Zechariah each day. These prayers of thanksgiving remind us that as we go forth from our prayer, we should remain ever grateful and keep our mind’s gaze on the Lord.

Closing Prayer At the conclusion of the Office the closing prayer galvinizes us, that we may enter into the next portion of our day with the Lord as our shield and the Gospel as our guide, ever humble that the gift of life flows from our Father in Heaven. The word Amen, just as with the Sign of the Cross, can be easy to speak without thought, but it is our final word as we leave to turn back to God and say, “I believe!”

Marian Hymn At the heart of every family is the mother; so, too, with the Holy Family, and indeed our whole Church, our mother is the heart: Mary. At the close of Compline we sing the Marian Hymn proper to the ligurgical season; and at St. Benedict’s Abbey we sing these hymns after Vespers as well, asking for our Blessed Mother to intercede for our vocational efforts.

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THE PRACTICE OF PRAYER Nothing is easy at the outset, and prayer is no different. While entire books are dedicated to this topic, we hope that these seven P’s for prayer will help you dip your toe into the waters of the Liturgy of the Hours.

Preparation How you prepare to encounter the Lord in prayer depends on the time of day; each Hour requires a different thought. In the morning, while it’s tempting to roll out of bed and begin, try and take a few moments to gather your thoughts and intentions for the day ahead, and seek to prepare for the other Hours of the day in a similar fashion, just sitting in silence preparing to speak to God. For Compline, try and do a true examination of conscience – remembering to recognize both where you have succeeded during the day, and where you can pray for the Lord to help you imrpove and grow.

Pacing It can be easy to blaze through prayers, especially when we have them memorized. Often you’ll hear the Our Father recited at a rate on par with that of an auctioneer. As you pray, try and remember that this is the Word of God – what does it mean for you? When you return to a Psalm you may have prayed dozens, hundreds, or eventually thousands of times, try and find a word or phrase that strikes at the moment, or highlights your own, current experience. As you practice this meditation, you’ll hear the Lord speaking to you in new and profound ways in your prayer.

Posture Our posture says a lot about our intentions and feelings. “Let us stand to sing the psalms in such a way that our minds are in harmony with our voices” (RB 19:7). How you address God is important – as you prepare for prayer consider how you’re sitting (or consider kneeling for a moment). Be sure to stand at the Doxology and bow as you recite, “Glory to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit.” And stand for other portions of the Hours. (For more on posture, watch Br. Leven’s Talk on the Liturgy of the Hours from the Holy Week Retreat).

Place & Pauses Praying can be difficult when you are not in a specifically religious setting. If you can, try and dedicate a space in your home to prayer. At left is a photo submitted by a Holy Week retreatant.

As we mentioned before, the Liturgy of the Hours is broken up into several parts. In between each part, we are given an opportunity to look back, to take a moment to pause and reflect on what we have just prayed – what is God saying to you? It is in silence we can open ourselves up to God, and silence doesn’t just mean not speaking, but listening as well.

Patience & Perseverance Let’s be realistic, very little in this world comes easily, and the Liturgy of the Hours is no different. If you feel distracted, that you are having a hard time getting started, or you’re just not in the mood, we have good news: you are normal! The best way to begin to add the Liturgy of the Hours to your life is a little at a time – if you try and do everything at once, you’re more likely to experience burnout. Try beginning by adding Compline each night and part or all of Morning Prayer. As you become comfortable, try adding more. Always remember, when you’re praying, you’re never alone! We remain, ever united, in Christ.

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Eternal rest grant unto him A b b o t R a l p h K o e h l e r, O S B

Born • January 20, 1929 Professed • July 11, 1956 Ordained • May 31, 1962 Elected A bbo t • N ov e mbe r 2 8 , 1 9 8 0 Died • March 21, 2020 The Right Reverend Ralph Koehler, sixth Abbot of Saint Benedict’s Abbey, died peacefully early Saturday morning, March 21, 2020, the Solemnity of the Passing of our Holy Father Saint Benedict. He had been fortified by the Sacraments of the Church, the Apostolic Pardon, and was surrounded by many of his brother monks at the time of his death.

Abbot Ralph (Wilfred) Koehler was born on January 20, 1929, in Seneca, Kansas, to John Koehler and Helen (Heideman) Koehler. For grade school and high school he attended Sts. Peter and Paul in Seneca, graduating from high school in May 1945. He enrolled at St. Benedict’s College in the fall that same year. He went on to enter formation for the monastic life at St. Benedict’s Abbey, but did not stay at that time.

In 1947 he enlisted in the newly created United States Air Force. He served as an airborne radar technician in the Eighth Air Force based in Roswell, New Mexico. In 1950 he was honorably discharged, having earned the rank of sergeant.

In 1954 he returned to St. Benedict’s College and in July 1955 he entered the novitiate at St. Benedict’s Abbey, receiving the name Ralph. He professed first vows on July 11, 1956. In 1958 he earned a bachelor’s degree in mathematics from St. Benedict’s College.

Having learned Portuguese, Abbot Ralph served the sacramental needs of the people of Brazil for 13 years.

After studying at the Abbey School of Theology, Abbot Ralph was ordained to the priesthood on May 31, 1962. In September of that year he went to the Abbey’s new mission of St. Joseph’s Priory, Mineiros, Goiás, Brazil, along with Father Herbert Hermes, who later would become a Bishop in Brazil. While in Brazil for the next 13 years, Abbot Ralph learned the language of the people, and served as a pastor and Prior. He also helped welcome the Sisters of Mount St. Scholastica Monastery from Atchison, Kansas, when they founded their monastery to serve the people of Mineiros.

In 1975 Abbot Ralph returned to the Abbey. He taught mathematics at Maur Hill Prep School, and served as Director of Camp St. Maur. In 1976 Abbot Brendan Downey asked him to serve as Prior of the Abbey.

Upon the death of Abbot Brendan in 1980, Abbot Ralph was elected sixth Abbot of St. Benedict’s Abbey on November 28, 1980, assuming the role of spiritual father to the community. He was blessed as Abbot on January 4, 1981, by Archbishop Ignatius Strecker of the Archdiocese of Kansas City in Kansas.

During his years as Abbot he guided the community in revising its Liturgy of the Hours.

He also oversaw the renovation of portions the monastery, creating a new infirmary area to care for the monks with healthcare needs.

Upon resigning as Abbot on December 3, 1989, Abbot Ralph began a fruitful career as a pastor, first serving as Administrator of his childhood parish, Sts. Peter and Paul in Seneca. Between 1990 and 2000, he served as Pastor of St. Ann, Effingham, Kansas; St. Louis, Good Intent, Kansas. From 1998 to 2000, he served as Pastor of St. Mary’s, St. Benedict, Kansas; St. Bede, Kelly, Kansas; and St. Patrick’s, Corning, Kansas. From 2000 to 2008 he served as Pastor of St. Ann, Hiawatha, Kansas.

Following the passing of Abbot Brendan Downey, Abbot Ralph Koehler was elected as our sixth Father in Christ on November 28, 1980, and was blessed on January 4, 1981.

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“When you went to confession to him, and experienced the fatherly mercy that came out of him, you could see why he was elected abbot.”

After returning to the Abbey in 2008, Abbot Ralph kept busy with projects around the monastery. He still enjoyed lifelong hobbies of golfing and fishing, and rarely missed a home Benedictine College Ravens’ football game. He enjoyed visiting with family and friends and reminding them, rather hilariously and loudly, that he was “suffering in silence.”

Abbot Ralph was preceded in death by his parents, John and Helen, and by two brothers, James and Ronald, and his sisters Rita Broderick and Mary Lear. He is survived by two sisters, Esther Profitt, and Barbara Buckley, and many nieces and nephews and dear friends.

With the COVID-19 outbreak, the monks celebrated Vespers for the Dead and the Mass of Christian Burial with interment in the Abbey Cemetery with his two surviving sisters present as well as a few nieces and nephews. At a later date the Abbey will celebrate a Memorial Mass for Abbot Ralph open to the public.

Memorials in honor of Abbot Ralph may be sent to St. Benedict’s Abbey using the enclosed envelope.

We commend our brother, Abbot Ralph, to your prayers.

Ab b ot Ral p h’ s C o at of A r ms

e xpl a in ed

The left side of Abbot Ralph Koehler’s coat of arms is that of St. Benedict’s Abbey – a feature of all Abbots’ Coats of Arms.

The crescent moon on a field of blue represents Our Lady of Divine Providence, patroness of St. Benedict’s Abbey. The lower half features a Cross Moline, a cross widely used by St. Benedict and Benedictine monks since the foundation of our order – the eight points on the cross represent the Beatitudes.

Remembering Abbot Ralph excerpts from abbot james’ funeral homily Abbot Ralph suffers in silence no longer.

Rather he shouts the Good News of the Resurrection.

In truth, Abbot Ralph knew the gift of silence, and he knew the importance of human affection and interaction.

His fatherhood to our community came out in that.

I was taking a closer look at Abbot Ralph’s pectoral cross, which depicts episodes of Jesus’ life. As I prayed with these scenes I noticed that most, if not all, of them relate a call into relationship and a call into active discipleship.

As we reflect on the life of Abbot Ralph, I believe the true gift he offered to our community, and all those he ministered to, was the gift of helping us see what God was calling out of us.

Being called into relationship with God, and having something called out of us to share that relationship, we begin to promote the Kingdom of God in which we strive to live. We must allow ourselves to be led – to trust.

We offer our gratitude to God for the work that Abbot Ralph offered in providing for us in the current Divine Office we pray each day.

It was under his guidance that this work came to fruition, a father who had great concern for his sons. “Blessed are those who hear the Word of God and put it into practice.”

Abbot Ralph was a provider: providing our method of prayer, providing for us in a period of transition in the community, providing for our apostolic work, and being one who led by example in rolling up his sleeves and diving into the work himself – a strong farm boy from Nemaha County.

St. Benedict reminds us that the abbot is to teach more by his example than by his words.

Abbot Ralph, we pray for you that you are enjoying the eternal banquet, the eternal and everlasting Eucharist, that you have been called into that eternal relationship with the Father who loves you, and that you are quietly, in joy-filled silence, offering intercession for us.

The right side of the coat of arms is unique to each abbot. The lower half is the Koehler family crest, featuring two six-pointed stars, an eight-pointed star, and a sprawling cross set in a field of blue; the eight-pointed star represents a strong spirituality from birth to death. The upper half is representative of Abbot Ralph, set on a field of red with a plow in remembrance of his patron, Blessed Ralph Milner, a convert to Catholicism and farmer, who was martyred for the Faith on July 7, 1591. The field also features a yellow quill for Abbot Ralph’s service as a teacher.

The coat of arms is surrounded by a black galero and six tassles, indicative of the office of abbot. Atop the coat of arms are a mitre and crozier; together with the pectoral cross and ring (at right) they comprise the articles of the office of abbot.

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Saying “yes” to God’s will THE SOLEMN P R O F E S S I O N O F BR. KAREL SOUKUP, OSB What brought you to St. Benedict’s Abbey?

I grew up in a small town, Lakin, in Southwest Kansas. I discovered St. Benedict’s Abbey almost completely by chance while studying Linguistics at the University of Kansas in 2004.

At that time Benedictine College was a little more than half of the size it is today – and I had no clue there was a college or a monastery up here. One Sunday I was serving Mass at the St. Lawrence Center at KU and Abbot James, then Prior and Vocations Director, showed up out of the blue. He invited me to visit the Abbey. I spent about three weeks here split up over the course of a semester in the Spring of 2005, and I sort of got hooked. I entered in the Fall of 2005 with Br. Leven Harton.

The first time, you discerned that it wasn’t the right time to enter the monastic life; what was it like going back out into the world?

As a novice you don’t take any vows and you’re free to leave whenever you want – I left after about nine months. It was a hard thing to do at the time. Afterward I studied at Mount St. Mary’s Seminary in Emmitsburg, Maryland. After two years I came to the conclusion that diocesan priesthood wasn’t for me. Seminary is supposed to be a temporary situation, the whole point is to get you trained and get you formed and then go off into that pastoral work, but I really enjoyed the camaraderie, the brotherhood at the seminary in a way that disclosed to me that being on my own out at a parish wasn’t going to be a good fit for me.

Leaving the seminary, I had no idea that I would come back to the monastery. I didn’t know what I wanted to do, so I spent a few years living and working odd jobs down around Wichita, Kansas, and it was at that point that I really discovered the need that I had for community life. The life that I was living wasn’t very glamorous, I was working at a grocery store trying to make ends meet, but I realized that the life that I was living was still a very selfish life – it was all centered around me and what I wanted. I knew that I needed something to draw me out of that and that’s where the idea of returning to the monastery first sprouted.

You’ ve become quite the artist, where did you learn your craft?

I grew up in a artistic family, though I don’t know that anyone would consider themselves an artist. My dad paints and does woodworking and my mom does lots of different crafts. I grew up with the mentality that if you want to do something you figure out how to do it and then you do it. Immediately after leaving seminary I was sitting on my parents couch filling out job applications, which you can only do for so long, when I stumbled on a Youtube video about bookbinding. And I was sort of hooked onto this craft with a long tradition of craftsmanship that’s seeing a revival. Coming to the monastery I was encouraged by superiors to continue binding books. I’ve had the opportunity to participate in a few workshops with a local iconographer, Elizabeth Zeller, so I’ve taken up iconography and egg tempera painting in general. I’ve also been taking art courses at Benedictine College and am just trying to hone my skills.

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My vows to the Lord I will fulfill before all his people.

- psalm 116:14

Br. Karel’s profession document illustrated and calligraphed by Br. Karel

Your name is unique, what can you tell us about your patron?

My patron is Blessed Karl of Austria. He was, to me, a really interesting person. He became emperor of Austria-Hungary during World War I – it’s really interesting, being a through and through American, that our enemy during a war was declared Blessed by the Church. One of the most extraordinary things he did (and was ultimately deposed by the Austrian generals for) was to try and broker a secret deal with the French. I thought that was an outstanding example of giving up everything to do what you thought was right. He was generally just a holy man; he died relatively young. The example of really embracing what God has in store for you when it seems that it’s all going wrong, I think is really beautiful.

What was on your mind as you approached your Solemn Profession?

A painting of Blessed Karl of Austria by Br. Karel

My thought, at the time, was that it’s not a big leap to make. The fact of the matter is when I wake up on Monday morning I’m going to do the exact same thing I did on Saturday and Friday and Thursday – whether it’s the week of my profession or really any other week at the Abbey. The process of going into solemn vows, for me, had two main factors: first, the community’s affirmation of what I perceive to be God’s will. Our rector at Seminary explained that God’s will comes to you through the Church.

If you aren’t voted forward to make solemn vows that’s a pretty good indication that it’s not God’s will for you to make solemn vows. Second, as in any lifestyle, there’s always things that attract you and things that grate on you; the question for me was, is it worth it being here? Are the hard things worth enduring for the sake of what is going right? Ultimately the conclusion I came to is “yes.” When I look back on my life and the way this community has formed me over the past five-plus years, and even beyond to my first novitiate fifteen years ago, I look back and say “it’s worth it.”

There are hard things that I have to endure, and sometimes I almost want to run away. But at the end of the day I look back and I say, “God wants me here.” As long as I’m here I know that he is going to take care of me and lead me and that this community is going to form me to be a better man.

This interview has been adapted from an episode of MONKCAST a podcast from the monks of St. Benedict’s Abbey. To listen or download this episode and see all of the photos from Br. Karel’s profession visit kansasmonks.org/karelprofession Follow the monks on social media and be sure to subscribe to MONKCAST on iTunes!

Summer 2020

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Being Embraced

by His love THE FIR S T P R O F E S S I O N O F BR. ANGELUS ATKINSON, OSB What first attracted you to monastic life?

I grew up on a 20 mile long island in Canada, a hundred yards from a small harbor. My brothers and sister and I would run out there practically every day to climb on rotted out docks and boats, collect shells, or just watch the tide. I remember being fascinated by the horizon where the ocean and the sky met and wanting, somehow, to belong to this endless blue expanse.

At some point someone told me about these people called monks whose entire life was taken up by God. This was before I ever visited a monastery but I was immediately attracted because I recognized that their lives were determined by the same desire I experienced looking out onto the ocean horizon: to go out into and belong entirely to the Infinite. This has never left me.

What, in your past, prepared you for the monastic life?

I met a group of friends in college who lived Christianity differently from me. The difference I saw was their freedom in front of the same problems and circumstances I had.

They were not afraid to take seriously all the questions and desires that life provoked in them, and to live these things together. So I began following this friendship in and beyond college and began seeing over the course of years that the more I follow what changes me the more I became free. Now I would describe this experience as stability, obedience, and conversatio morum.

What has surprised you since you entered the postulancy?

The faithfulness of Jesus Christ. Every day without exception. No matter what is happening, no matter how many times I betray myself and forget what I really desire, he invites me to turn to him and beg, incline the ear of my heart, and ask again to see his face. It has been as simple as a line of the psalms in the Hours, a conversation with my superior, seeing the face of a brother in the hallway in silence on his way to prayers, remembering the gaze of a friend, or a Scripture passage during lectio divina.

Whatever the means he uses (and this is a constant surprise too, God’s creativity – he can use the most humble and surprising means) my heart is reawakened and I am returned to myself.

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Listen carefully, my son, to the master’s instructions, and attend to them with the ear of your heart. This is the advice from a father who loves you; welcome it, and faithfully put it into practice.

THE LIFE AND TIMES OF

- rule of st. benedict, prologue:1

BR. ANGELUS ATKINSON, OSB

What are some of your hopes or aspirations for your future as a monk of St. Benedict’s Abbey?

Before I began the journey which led me here I would have had a long list of hopes and aspirations – careers and plans, etc. Every now and then they might pop up but they don’t have the same urgency and seem much less interesting than what is becoming for me something more and more simple. My only hope is to be embraced by his love tomorrow as I have been today, and to be faithful to his presence, through whatever circumstances he gives to us. Perhaps that will involve this or that project but what is important for me is recognizing Who gives this to me and then simply responding. To put it another way, I want to give myself for the human glory of Jesus of Nazareth in this place. I heard of a monk who said on the day of his solemn profession: “I want to give myself as fertilizer for this community.” I hope Christ grows in me a heart that can say this every day.

Could you offer some advice or lessons that you have learned during your monastic formation?

What made a crucial shift in my own prayer life before coming to the Abbey was living a simple rule of life which included doing at least ten minutes of silence every day. This was proposed to me not as a program of self-perfection or self-improvement but as a way of being in front of God, of begging. Five of those ten minutes are spent on the knees. Since coming here the beauty and necessity of living a rule of life as a constant asking for His presence has only grown.

A lesson that Fr. Jay, my Novice Master, really helped us experience is that it’s important to accept the difficulties that surface in silence.

They are given to help us recognize one thing: our need. So even these become a moment to beg, to recognize Who gives me life, to ask for his life today, for the help to be true today. I think one of the most noble figures in the scriptures is the blind man Bartimeus because he has no pretensions but simply knows the truth of his own humanity (being a beggar) and what he desires (“Lord, that I may see.”). Prayer is desire.

Augustine tells us, that when Paul tells us to “Pray without ceasing” he means “Desire unceasingly that life of happiness which is nothing if not eternal, and ask it of him who alone is able to give it.” We can can never separate prayer and silence from life. Rather it is a moment of greater awareness of the truth of all of our day, all of our life.

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Parents: Joseph and Nancy Atkinson

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Hometown: Rockville, Maryland

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College Major: English Literature, with a minor in Latin

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Favorite Saint: Mary

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Favorite Devotion: the Angelus

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Favorite Book: The Religious Sense by Fr. Luigi Giussani

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Reading Now: Czeslaw Milosz’s Collected Poems

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Favorite Movie: Tree of Life - Terrence Malick

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Favorite Food: What’s for lunch

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Favorite Childhood Toy: Legos

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Favorite Place: Here

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Favorite Cereal: Mum’s homemade granola (AKA “Mummy Cereal”)

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Best job I ever had: Teaching middle and high school Latin

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Worst job I ever had: Not “worst” but most difficult- first year of teaching

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You didn’t know: My first visit to the Abbey was a stop on a 4,125 mile motorcycle trip around the eastern half of the U.S.A.

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Best advice I’ve ever received: Never stop verifying.

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An Unexpected Desire THE FIR S T P R O F E S S I O N O F BR. MAXIMILIAN MARY ANDERSON, OSB What first attracted you to monastic life?

What first attracted me to the monastic life was an unexpected desire for the vocation to virginity, for belonging to God in a unique way.

I really didn’t know what that was going to mean concretely for my life, but I knew Br. Leven, Fr. Simon, Fr. Jay, and some of the other monks here.

That was enough to get me to come on my first Come and See retreat here and I kept coming back because I saw a way of life and a way of following Jesus that was attractive to me.

What, in your upbringing, prepared you for the monastic life?

My parents raised me Catholic. I think I can sometimes wrongfully devalue that by trying to focus on the holes in what I received from them. That’s not the point, though.

God gave me to my parents, entrusted them with bringing me up in the Church, and the important thing is that God gave me through them what I could not have given myself, namely life. I received a lot of good things from them over the years, but the faith that they tried to pass on to me for the sake of my eternal life is definitely the best.

What has surprised you since you entered the postulancy?

I was most surprised by how bad I was at being a monk. I had some attitudes and habits that I brought in with me that I kind of expected I was going to need to drop, I was just surprised by how quickly. I will never forget Fr. Jay telling me “you have to stop dabbing.” [It’s a popular dance move]. That was a moment where my immaturity was shown to me in a way that was really fruitful. Fr. Jay’s correction was a gift because it helped me recognize where I was, accept my need to grow, and surrender to the way of life God was leading me to.

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Do not be daunted immediately by fear and run away from the road that leads to salvation.

It is bound to be narrow at the outset.

THE LIFE AND TIMES OF

- rule of st. benedict, prologue: 48

What are some of your hopes or aspirations for your future as a monk of St. Benedict’s Abbey?

I hope I get better at singing. It’s not that I think I’m terrible now, but sometimes my throat hurts a little on the higher notes and I can tell I’m straining. Outside of not experiencing pain, I hope that I grow in my singing because it’s a big part of our celebration of the liturgy. We sing hymns at Morning and Midday Prayer, we sing for Mass, and we sing everything for Vespers. Singing is something that is proper to the liturgy and elevates it beyond regular talking, which is good because the liturgy is not just regular talking. My prayer is helped both in that what I offer is of a higher order than mundane speech and I am struck by the words of the psalms, hymns, and antiphons in a way that I wouldn’t be otherwise.

Could you offer one piece of advice or a lesson that you have learned during your monastic formation?

Keep at it. Santa Teresa de Ávila says to do this with a “muy determinada determinación,” with a tenacious tenacity. This has served me well especially when I am tempted to self-pity. I don’t think that I am alone in that. What I see happen is that when I have a “bad” time in prayer with distractions and whatnot, I come away often desiring more to be with him. The ironic thing is that that’s kind of the whole point of prayer, the expansion of my desire and capacity for God. My recognition of my inability to reach him on my own puts me in the position most conducive to praying: begging for him to come to me and save me. I find when I do that, he always does.

BR. MAXIMILIAN MARY ANDERSON, OSB •

Parents: Joseph and Jeanne Anderson

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Hometown: Gillette, Wyoming

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First Vows: Dec. 8, 2019

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College Major: International Business and Spanish

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Favorite Saint: St. Peter

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Favorite Devotion: The Rosary

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Favorite Book: The Lord of the Rings

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Reading Now: Centered on Christ: A Guide to Monastic Profession

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Favorite Movie: Napoleon Dynamite

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Favorite Food: Mac & Cheese

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Favorite Childhood Toy: Legos

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Favorite Place: Seville, Spain

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Favorite Cereal: Raisin Bran

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Best job I ever had: FOCUS Missionary

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Worst Job I ever had: Ice Cream Server

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You didn’t know: I really like ice skating.

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Best advice I’ve ever received: Do the next right thing.

Summer 2020

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What Changed?

Trusting Providence

by Br. Jean-Marie Hogan

by Br. Vladimir Barrett

The other day a confrere said something that annoyed me.

Afterwards, I went and talked with him about it. We had a great conversation: he was receptive and helpful, and I came away with the sense that we had built up friendship. I’m not sure I could have approached the conversation that way six months ago. This experience prompted me to ask myself the question: what changed?

One thing I have been learning since I came to the monastery is how to pray well. Specifically, St. Benedict suggests lectio divina, prayerful reading of scripture. I have found doing lectio divina well requires listening to God. Some days, I walk through the process of lectio, only to ask myself: Have I actually prayed?

Or have I simply muscled my way through by thinking about God, rather than listening to Him? On the best days, though, I have been surprised by the direction in which God led me. I may have thought I knew where I was going to go during that period of lectio, but he seemed to have something else in mind.

In lectio, I have learned how important it is to have a specific word or resolution at the end. If my resolution is something like, “Today, I am going to trust God more,” then, good as that is, I can’t really ask myself at the end of the day whether I have accomplished it. It’s too vague. Lectio has proven more fruitful when I have a word or phrase that I can come back to.

I have also discovered how to pray during the moments of silence during the Liturgy of the Hours. At first, I was using these times to address God in an unspecified way, but what I have found is that these are opportunities for me to mull over the psalm we have just recited. Sometimes I do this by returning to a specific word or phrase from that psalm, much in the manner of lectio divina.

Another major lesson has been the art of having difficult conversations. Perhaps a brother and I disagree about a topic, but I want him to be able to say what he thinks about it, without being afraid that I might judge him. In this, all the other things that I have been learning about prayer come into play. If I remain in Christ, I will be more able to approach that confrere with a spirit of charity and calm. This is by no means a skill I have perfected, but one that I am still very much in the process of learning.

One of the greatest blessings I’ve received during my novitiate is the growth in my own awareness of and trust in Divine Providence. I still have a long way to go, but the effects of this new mindset are already evident and bearing fruit. My hope and prayer is that, as I continue to grow in this regard, it will lead me to deeper levels of piety wherever my life may take me.

Before joining the Abbey, I found it easy to describe to another person how Divine Providence works and would advise them to entrust themselves to the Lord in all areas of their lives.

However, an honest examination reveals to me that I would lose sight of this ideal in myself all too often. Work, family problems, the ministry I was doing back home, and my own personal failures all weighed heavily on me, and I rarely was able to listen to the voice of the Lord amidst all of the noise coming from these stressors. I’ve noticed that since I have arrived at the Abbey, however, I have been more able to see how the Lord is acting in adverse circumstances, or at least trust that he is doing so without me knowing how.

My vision of living in the Abbey before I joined was perhaps too idyllic, and I imagined it as a perfect peaceful place. Even though this is indeed a peaceful place, the cause isn’t that the monks never have any conflicts, but that the community is truly seeking to see the face of Christ in the person with whom we are experiencing tension. In the Novitiate, we have received formation on this topic, but the best instruction has come from the example of other monks – an example far more influential on me than any class. Learning about surrender to Divine Providence is beautiful, but seeing it lived out is what has really led me to try and open my eyes to how God is manifesting Himself in the brother I’m upset with, in the correction I’m receiving, in the plan I had that isn’t being acted on, in the weather not being ideal, or in any of the other thousands of things that can go wrong or that pull me away from keeping my focus on God throughout my day.

This mindfulness of how God is acting throughout the day – in ways I like and especially in ways I wouldn’t choose for myself – has given me a much deeper sense of peace, unity with my brothers, ability to tolerate the wrongs I feel, and a greater desire to let him work more fully through me.

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Work of your servant’s hands THE DECORATION OF THE PASCHAL CANDLE

by Br. Karel Soukup One of the greatest blessings I have received being switched to carving the wax a member of this community is the opportunity for me and applying shellac tinted to share myself through artistic expression. Of all the with finely ground pigments. I occasions for me to make art, painting our community’s am comfortable and confident paschal candle is by far one of the most privileged. For enough with this technique that me, it represents the clearest opportunity I have to use I can easily create the candle’s my talent in a way that makes a direct decoration during the Triduum. impact on the community’s life, but in My first consideration is a way that frees me from the dangers that the design be fitted to the of pride and vanity. Even though my ritual and reflect the Church’s work is carried in procession through expectations of what a paschal the church and the cantor asks God for candle is. There is little guidance the grace to “sing this candle’s perfect or limitation, but it must have a praises” during the Exsultet, I am cross, with an alpha above and reminded that the candle is not to be omega below and surrounded an object of pride, but rather “a solemn by the numerals of the year. offering, the work of bees and your Next, it must integrate with its servants’ hands.” I am thankful that surroundings in the monastic my contribution is acknowledged and church. To me, that means bold praised, but even more thankful that colors and clean lines with few God is served and I am reduced to an representational or figurative anonymous servant, no more notable elements. The candle’s shape, than an insect. being extreme in the proportion My first opportunity to paint the of its height to its width, and the community’s paschal candle came in distance from which it is usually 2015. I don’t know that anyone in our viewed also dictate that simpler is community had, to that point, thought usually better and easier to read. of the candle as a unique work of art, Sometimes individuals come to but rather simply as a ritual necessity me and relate their interpretation to be ordered out of a catalogue, its of the artwork. Any meaning appearance largely an afterthought. found in the artwork is a But, Fr. Simon was then studying at St. confluence of what the piece is and Meinrad Seminary where he learned who the viewer is. I experience that Br. John Mark Falkenhain paints Paschal Candles from this even as the creator: during their candle. Fr. Simon, expressing 2017-20 by Br. Karel the making of the piece I discover his desire to do the same for our within it meaning I did not know community but unsure of his ability to was there. As I painted last year’s make that commitment, mentioned this to Br. Timothy, candle, a mingling swirl of black and white our sacristan, who then approached me about the idea. punctuated with a central burst of gold, the My techniques have changed over the past six years. phrase “a pillar of cloud by day and a pillar of There was a steep learning curve at the beginning; there fire by night” (cf. Exodus 13:21–22) came to my are virtually no published resources on techniques of mind. That image of God was not a conscious paschal candle decoration. My first attempt was to use consideration as I worked out the design, but a painted-paper appliqué fused into the wax. My first both somehow came from deep within me. test went well, but when the heat gun broke on Holy This year, I explored a tetradic color harmony Saturday morning as I was finishing the final piece, the of warm and cool greens contrasted against project nearly ended in tears. The next year, I was sure oranges and purples. I am waiting for God to to have the work completed before Lent began. I’ve reveal the meaning in that to me.

the

Paschal Candle A S H O RT F I L M B Y B R . K A R E L S O U K U P, O S B

stream it now at kansasmonks.org/paschalcandlefilm Summer 2020

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A ll My Desires A re Know n to Yo u

a se r ie s by t he m onk s of s t. be ne dict ’s a bbe y

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hope

A storm is raging. Where do we turn?

When we first saw the Holy Father standing alone in the center of St. Peter’s Square, preparing to deliver his Extraordinary Urbi et Orbi as the COVID-19 pandemic set in, it was impossible not to be plagued with anxiety – what does this mean for our Church? What does this mean for our world?

Even the disciples, in the very presence of Christ, were terrified of the storm they faced. But as Pope Francis spoke he reminded us that, though we, the modern disciples of Christ, are given to fear and terror by our very nature, we know where we can turn: They had not stopped believing in [Jesus]; in fact, they called on him. But we see how they call on him: “Teacher, do you not care if we perish?” (v. 38). Do you not care: they think that Jesus is not interested in them, does not care about them. One of the things that hurts us and our families most when we hear it said is: “Do you not care about me?” It is a phrase that wounds and unleashes storms in our hearts.

It would have shaken Jesus too. Because he, more than anyone, cares about us. Indeed, once they have called on him, he saves his disciples from their discouragement.

Indeed this pandemic has exposed us: it has exposed our need for the Sacraments – it has exposed our need for community – it has exposed our need for love.

In the Triduum, we enter fully into the mystery, the source and summit of our faith: the Last Supper, Passion, Death, and Resurrection of our Savior. While the whole of the Gospels (and indeed, all of scripture) inform and shape our lives, it is in these days, this annual reliving of Christ’s salvific act from which our Catholic faith flows, that we are renewed. In a time when we were cut off from the sacraments and one another, we were forced to reflect on all of the gifts bestowed upon us by that same Catholic faith.

With this in mind – where do we turn? In seeking an answer, we wanted to delve deeper, seeking to fill that need that had been exposed by this pandemic: what do I desire? There is one who knows, even when we do not: it is our Savior. It cannot be better stated than it was by St. Augustine, “you have made us for yourself, O Lord, and our hearts are restless until they rest in you.”

Indeed we are restless, and this pandemic laid that bare – let us, then, seek to rest in him from whom all good things flow, the triune God who knows, as the title of our retreat is meant to echo, all of my desires.

In the following pages our brothers offer their thoughts and advice on how we can fulfill our desires and overcome our fears – through Christ.

All of the retreat materials and videos are available free online at kansasmonks.org/holyweek2020 These articles are a jumping off point to all of the information that can be found there.

Summer 2020

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Holy Week Retreat-in-Pl ace 2020

Entering the Silence that Changes Me

by Br. Leven Harton A little while back, a book showed up in my monastery mailbox without a note or any kind of explanation. The book was a kind of self-help book, identifying a character defect and offering a program for addressing this defect. Seeing the title, I immediately took offense. I resorted to blaming and accusing a particular person, someone whom I had no good reason (really) to identify as the culprit, and of whose motive (were he the perpetrator) I had no inkling. Fortunately, I discovered the book just before morning prayers and so was forced to enter into the silence and stillness of Vigils and Lauds. And it wasn’t too long, maybe three minutes, after the offices began that I had a moment of grace and asked myself, “Why would someone put this book in your box?

Do you have this character defect?” And, all of the sudden, because I was willing to investigate the matter, I was open to it, a memory came back to me from just a few months before: me going to this very brother I had in mind, having to apologize to him and ask his forgiveness because of the very defect addressed in the book.

This was a wonderful moment for me. Independent of the origins of the book or reasons for its advent, I felt my entrenched anger just begin to collapse in the cold light of the truth about my person—I DO need to work on this negative quality! And the resistance in my heart to simply admitting that I needed to work on a part of myself, perceived

The silence in the Church is palpable – not an appalling silence, yet a silence that pierces...God is revealing to us his plan of salvation, and making present to us the very life he desires to offer us – your situation in this moment is where God is choosing to reveal his love to you.

- Abbot James Albers Holy Thursday Homily

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by another person, it, too, began to melt— very gently, very peacefully. The desire to accuse and blame diminished too and, even though I still had a little bit of a hurt ego, I was able to allow the judgment against me in. I was able to receive it and I felt freer in being able to receive it. But free from what? Probably fear. My anger, I think, had more to do with feeling uncomfortable with being seen as deficient, fear that this weighing of my person was true. To be free from that fear in acceptance was wonderful.

Speaking and teaching are the master’s task; the disciple is to be silent and listen.

This event has brought me back to a key distinction that one of my confreres, Br. Karel, has made. He notes that St. Benedict’s chapter on silence is titled De Taciturnitate, which is often translated as “On Silence.” But that is not a very precise translation. The - Rule of St. word for silence in Latin is Benedict 6:6 silentium. Taciturnitate is better rendered, “restraint of speech,” like someone who is (in English) taciturn. And in that chapter of the Rule you can read, “Speaking and teaching are the master’s task; the disciple is to be silent and listen.” Br. Karel explained that St. Benedict sees silence not as an experience of going out to Walden Pond and fleeing the distractions and noise of others, achieving a “zero” on the decibel scale. Rather, silence in the monastery has to do with me being silent—me not putting myself, my ideas, my noise out there. Silence, as a Benedictine virtue, is not avoiding being bothered—it’s not running from what is bothering me. It’s being still, even if we are being bothered, because we are being bothered.

I was lucky to be forced into this kind of silence at prayers after finding the book in my box. Unable to turn my attention away from prayers and concentrate on all the ways I’d been wronged, I was positioned to sit with what was bothering me. In the early monastic tradition, Abba Moses has a pithy saying that expresses the optimism that I can learn from even painful and bothersome situations: ‘Go, sit in your cell, and your cell will teach you everything.’ Staying in place, in silence, with one’s troubles is not consigning oneself to doom or destruction. At least it does not have to be a defeat.

Fr. Julian Carron, the leader of the movement Communion

Hope deferred makes the heart sick.

- Proverbs 13:12

and Liberation, contributed to a conference in Florence last year. The conference was titled Solitude, the Enemy. He offered these words: Depending on the way we live, solitude can be either a condemnation or a victory. It is a fork in the road... [A] person chooses to either “be alone,” in other words to temporarily separate from people and things in order to discover the meaning of himself, or to “isolate oneself,” closing in on oneself because there is nothing outside of oneself to discover.

The posture of silence is embracing our being alone as an assistance to us, a pathway to receiving. In taking up this tool, we find a way forward, out of our own feelings of defeat.

Receiving the questioning that our lives inevitably mete out to us is not to assume a posture of good “Catholic guilt.” Let me recall my experience after I realized that I had deserved to receive that little book in my box from whomever: I was relieved. My anger dissipated, my fear receded, and the only thing left was a little bit of a sting to my pride, knowing that I was not so holy as I thought. As it turned out, the patient confrontation with this awful realization about myself was less devastating than I had originally anticipated. The discomfort that came to me, through what I had perceived at first to be a judgment against me, was just a phase of engaging reality—it was just part of the total experience.

And it passed in about three minutes. My fear, fortified by my instinctual recoiling from looking at myself in a negative light, was worse than the actual reality. I was not even really angry in that moment, I was more fearful. The rest of that experience, in fact, was a growing acceptance of myself—an acquiescence to being taught by the book that was given to me. So, inhabiting a posture of silence is not a neurotic or scrupulous self-examination that leads us deeper and deeper into our problems, all the while alienating us from God and

from our true self. The practice of a personal silence in the face of reality is a first step toward authentic understanding and wisdom. It leads us to what Fr. Michael Casey has called, “Living in the Truth”—that is, humility. He described it like this: “The fruit of humility is naturalness. Being at home with ourselves. Being ourselves. It begins subtly in the depths of our spirits, but in the course of a lifetime evangelizes all levels of our being until it becomes outward, visible, communicable, (Living in the Truth, 25).” We get to be ourselves in the kind of growth I am talking about.

All of this presumes a real trust in reality, a real trust in God’s nearness to us. Abba Moses did not have this when he first entered the monastic way. An earlier tale from his life goes like this: “It happened that Abba Moses was struggling with the temptation of fornication. Unable to stay any longer in the cell, he went and told Abba Isidore. The old man exhorted him to return to his cell. But he refused, saying, ‘Abba, I cannot.’ Then Abba Isidore took Moses out onto the terrace and said to him, ‘Look towards the west.’ He looked and saw hordes of demons flying about and making a noise before launching an attack. Then Abba Isidore said to him, ‘Look towards the east.’ He turned and saw an innumerable multitude of holy angels shining with glory. Abba Isidore said, ‘See, these are sent by the Lord to the saints to bring them help, while those in the west fight against them. Those who are with us are more in number than they are.’ Then Abba Moses gave thanks to God, plucked up courage, and returned to his cell.”

What gives Abba Moses the courage to live in his cell and to embrace the silence is a recognition of God’s power and nearness. This memory of God’s work in our lives is the foundation for us to accept the silence that can change us.

Retreatant Question: If you experience anxiety, fear, or discouragement in solitude and silence how do you get out of it? Do you have any advice or a specific prayer?

Br. Leven: Take your struggles before God first, but also share your struggles with another person. Each time I recount my own struggles they become more real – I start to gain wisdom just in trying to relate my challenges.

If I am overmatched by reality and challenges I find that I need to be like Abba Moses and seek counsel (even if it means I’m just going to return to my room.) For me, I found relief when I became willing; and there was relief in encountering my own weakness and coming to the truth.

Watch Br. Leven’s talk with Q&A or read the unabridged version at Kansasmonks.org/leventalk Have questions? Email us at info@kasnsasmonks.org Summer 2020

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Holy Week Retreat-in-Pl ace 2020

Communion:

An Ever Present Realit y

by Fr. Meinrad Miller Koinonia: the idea of common ownership. After the disciples, Peter and Andrew, James and John encountered Jesus, they knew that what held them together, what they held in common, was not a fleet of fishing boats. Rather the very life of Jesus, his flesh and blood, ran through their veins.

Behold, I am with you always, until the end of the age.

- Matthew 28:16

From this idea St. Benedict named the kind of monks who follow him as cenobites – those who live the life of Koinonia. What binds us together are not just lofty ideas, but the very life of Jesus fills us with strength. This term, while applied to monks, applies to every Christian.

Today, we are all called to live this communion.

This is why we call the Great Sacrament, the Body and Blood of Christ, Holy Communion.

Pope Benedict XVI in his Easter Vigil Homily in 2011, said this communion is not something that is added later, but was present with God from creation in his covenants.

In this way, communion between God and man does not appear as something extra, something added later to a world already fully created. The Covenant, communion between God and man, is inbuilt at the deepest level of creation.

As I prepared to profess my first vows as a Benedictine monk, on July 11, 1986, Fr. Timothy Fry, long-time chair of the English Department at St. Benedict’s College, and later editor of the monumental RB1980, an edition of the Rule to commemorate St. Benedict’s 1500th birthday in 1980, told me to read Hebrews 11. That text beautifully recounts the faith of the ancients. On the day of my profession, as Fr. Timothy, along with the other monks, welcomed me into the community, he said words to me that I will always cherish, “Remember your covenant.” Over the years the words of Fr. Timothy and Pope Benedict became a key for me: The Covenant, communion between God and man, is inbuilt at the deepest level of creation. The source and summit of that life is the Eucharist.

COVID-19 reminds us that, in every age, it is tempting to forget about God, to think that God has forgotten us. But Jesus’ closing words in Matthew’s Gospel still echo in our hearts: (Mt 28:16) Behold, I am with you always, until the end of the age.

Before Jesus enters Jerusalem to suffer and to die for us, he teaches the disciples three times of his true mission. The first two times he simply says that he will go to Jerusalem, and that 24

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the Son of man will go to Jerusalem, both times predicting his passion, death and resurrection.

But I would like to focus on the third prediction of his passion, from Matthew 20:18-19: Behold, we are going up to Jerusalem, and the Son of Man will be handed over to the chief priests and the scribes, and they will condemn him to death, and hand him over to the Gentiles to be mocked and scourged and crucified, and he will be raised on the third day.

Something radically changes here. No longer is Jesus just speaking of himself, but he is saying that we also will go up with him and share in this greatest event of all human history. We participate, even now, in that one perfect sacrifice of Jesus.

Again recall that Jesus, on Holy Thursday and in each Mass, asks us to enter very deeply into the mystery of his covenant: Then he took a cup, gave thanks, and gave it to them, saying, “Drink from it, all of you, for this is my blood of the covenant, which will be shed on behalf of many for the forgiveness of sins. (Mt 26:27-28) At the Last Supper, Jesus both gives himself to us in the Holy Sacrament of the altar, and he also, in John 13, teaches us about humility and service: He...took off his outer garment...and tied it around his waist. Then he poured water into a basin and began to wash the disciples’ feet and dry them...He came to Simon Peter, who said to him, “Master, are you going to wash my feet?” Jesus answered and said to him, “What I am doing, you do not understand now, but you will understand later.” Peter said to him, “You will never wash my feet.”

In the weariness of our journey, Jesus stoops to wash our feet.

He through whom all things came into being, stoops to wash our feet. He who is God from God, light from light stoops down to wash our feet. Like Peter, it seems impossible that God should even know who I am, let alone wash my feet.

This teaching of Jesus was not lost on Christians through the ages. St. Benedict’s chapter on welcoming guests recalls a beautiful tradition: The abbot shall pour water on the hands of the guests, and the abbot with the entire community shall wash their feet.

After the washing they will recite this verse: God, we have received your mercy in the midst of your temple (Ps 48:10).

When I do something good for another, I think that I am giving God’s mercy. But St. Benedict clearly states that when we have washed the feet of guests, it is we who receive mercy. We are blessed by imitating Christ.

What the Lord’s Supper highlights for us is our entering into Christ’s priestly sacrifice of love. His offering makes us into an offering – his body becomes our body – his blood our blood... we find ourselves in the collision of heaven and earth melded into one Kingdom.

- Abbot James Albers • Holy Thursday Homily

Who do you care for, to whom do you make yourself inferior and last of all? Some cringe at the notion of being inferior and last of all, yet that is precisely what Jesus has done for us in his incarnation, in the washing of the feet, and in his most ignominious passion, suffering, and death.

In John 13:35, Jesus tells us how we will be known as his disciples: This is how all will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.

I find this striking. Jesus does not say people will know you are my disciples because you have the biggest bank account or you have memorized the most Bible verses (although prayerfully reading the Bible does help you to love God and neighbor). Rather, Jesus’ criteria for being known as his disciple is that we have love for one another.

Right now, I ask you to think of someone in your life whom you find difficult to love.

Ask the Lord to give you the grace to love that person, perhaps to either forgive or ask forgiveness of that person.

A key for all of us living in close quarters is a quote from Romans 12:9-10. St. Benedict quotes this twice in his chapter on the good zeal of monks. St. Paul teaches: Let love be sincere; hate what is evil, hold on to what is good; love one another with mutual affection; anticipate one another in showing honor.

Just as Jesus took the initiative to stoop down and wash the feet of the disciples, so

we can anticipate the needs of one another, out of love. Many of you do this by praying together, sharing meals together, working together, keeping in touch with loved ones.

No matter what separates us, we can pray for, and encourage one another, whether they are in the next room in our house, or across the world.

There are many daily tasks that you are doing that can remind you of God’s presence. St. Benedict, in speaking of the kitchen servers, states that such service increases reward and fosters love. Helping cook, clean, do the dishes, respecting those around us, all can be helpful.

Where is Christ? He is present here, in our living together, praying together, hoping and believing together.

What about the pandemic? What about all the questions and the uncertainties?

Be not afraid to allow Christ into your heart today. As we live that covenant and communion with him and one another intensely in these days of Holy week, we will come to understand these words of St. Benedict: What, dear brothers, is more delightful than this voice of the Lord calling to us? See how the Lord in his love shows us the way of life. Clothed then with faith and the performance of good works, let us set out on this way, with the Gospel for our guide, that we may deserve to see him who has called us to his kingdom (1 Thess 2:12).

Retreatant Question: How do you live in communion with others who don’t practice our faith or even hold it in contempt or disdain?

Fr. Meinrad: Everyday we have to have the confidence of those early disciples – before there was fear, but with the coming of the Holy Spirit there is a confidence. It’s not an in your face sort of attitude, but rather a recognition that faith is important, and it’s to be able to share your faith, and how belief in God sustains you. Also, know that you’re not praying alone, but in prayer you are united to the whole Church.

Watch Fr. Meinrad’s talk with Q&A or read the unabridged version at Kansasmonks.org/meinradtalk Have questions? Email us at info@kasnsasmonks.org Summer 2020

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Holy Week Retreat-in-Pl ace 2020

The Joy of Full Surrender

by Fr. Simon Baker

The Death of God on Good Friday is at once the most heinous act ever committed and the most splendid event in the history of the universe. To properly understand Calvary one must, with a contemplative gaze, look at Christ’s suffering, shame, abandonment, persecution, and death while at the same time looking through this event towards its culmination in the Resurrection of Easter Sunday. We cannot skip the unpleasant parts in favor of the glorious ones, nor can we get stuck on Calvary forgetting that the cross is not the final chapter. This was Jesus Christ’s own method, who for “the sake of the joy that lay before him he endured the cross, despising its shame,” (Heb 12: 2). The joy to come gave Jesus the endurance needed to embrace his cross.

Also noted in the above quoted Letter to the Hebrews is the acknowledgment that Jesus despised the shame of the cross. Notice the author does not say he despised its guilt.

A distinction must be made here. Guilt is traditionally understood in the phrase “I did something bad,” whereas shame sounds more like, “I am something bad.” Guilt is associated with one’s actions and behaviors. Shame touches to the core of one’s identity. To be sure, both guilt and shame are very real experiences in the event of the cross, but only one is to be despised. Even though the emotion of guilt generally carries a bad reputation (think of the derisive phrase “Catholic guilt” to indicate how the “oppressive” Catholic Church makes people feel bad for doing what they like) guilt

We must wait in the lonely silence of Good Friday with our eyes fixed on the Cross.

In Eden, a tree brought about our condemnation. On Good Friday another tree – the Cross, the Tree of Life – brings about our redemption.

“Behold the wood of the cross, on which hung the salvation of the world.”

- Abbot James Albers Good Friday Homily

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is actually a healthy person’s response to bad behavior. The complete absence of guilt in a person’s life either means they are as innocent as the Blessed Virgin Mary or, in the words of well-known author and speaker Brené Brown, borderline psychopathic. When we look with faith at our Savior hanging from the cross we should know that our sins hung him there, and this knowledge is what leads us to repentance. The work of the Holy Spirit is to “convict the world in regard to sin and righteousness and condemnation” (Jn 16:8); the sins for which we should feel guilty, the righteousness that comes from belief in Jesus, and the condemnation that comes to those who refuse to repent.

For our sake he made him to be sin who did not know sin.

Truly, “the Lord laid upon - Second him the guilt of us all” Corinthians 5:21 (Is 53:6). But he also laid upon him the shame of us all. In the Garden of Eden we meet our first parents, newly created by God, untouched by sin and evil, “naked and without shame” (Gn 2:25). However, once sin entered the world shame entered as well, both for Adam and Eve and all humanity descending from them. The experience of shame distorts reality and can easily trick its prey into thinking of themselves as too broken, too far gone, for even God to reach. Then we meet Jesus, the new Adam, on the hill of Calvary naked and without shame. In this vision we awaken to the knowledge that even our greatest shame was taken up by him so that absolutely nothing may be out of his redemptive reach.

On the cross, Jesus took up every one of our experiences of sin, of guilt, and of our shame. First, there is the awful shame of abandonment by those who are supposed to love us. “About three o’clock Jesus cried out in a loud voice, “Eli, Eli, lema sabachthani?” which means, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” (Mt 27:46). It is, of course, impossible that God the Father could have actually abandoned Jesus.

However, the Son’s experience of his Father’s abandonment was a very real experience. Jesus had to go to the depths of such an experience of abandonment, because we experience such felt abandonment by God. When we cry out “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me,” we need to have someone to look to in order to know that we are not alone in our suffering and that this experience is not the final word.

The cries of the people, the weapons and torches, the thorns and purple cloak, the bitter wine, that poignant moment between Jesus and his mother, Christ’s pierced side, the flowing of blood and water – all these details paint a lasting picture in our minds, yet these images only begin to scratch the surface of our understanding of the reality of our salvation... to understand how our sin ravaged Christ’s body – that we might have life.

- Abbot James Albers • Good Friday Homily Second, there is the shame of an unwanted identity, a powerful shame trigger. Jesus, the perfect sinless one, “was counted among the transgressors” (Is 53:12), and “for our sake he made him to be sin who did not know sin (2 Cor 5:21 – emphasis added). For a sinless one, there is no unwanted identity more abhorrent than that of a sinner. Jesus, a spotless unblemished lamb, allowed Himself to be identified with sinners to ransom us by his precious blood (1 Pt 1:18-19).

Third, there is the shame of uselessness, of not being good enough.

The cross of Calvary comes after three years of countless miracles, exorcisms, resurrection, and Jesus’ bold proclamation of the Good News such that “never before has anyone spoken like this one” (Jn 7:46). The experience of the cross is seemingly Jesus’ most useless moment. On Calvary he is doing none of the good activity that gained him so many admirers during his apostolic labors. Yet, as the author Frank Sheed says in his work, To Know Christ Jesus, the complete offering of the Son to the Father on the cross is the most active moment of Christ’s priesthood. We are not saved by his teachings or even his miracles. We are saved by his cross.

Fourth, there is the shame of failure. Christ was sent by his Father to accomplish a mission. However, on Calvary all but a handful of his disciples deserted; instead of giving life to others, he loses his own; instead of building a glorious body (of the Church), he wore a lacerated one; instead of leading others to faith, he was denounced and mocked by even a lowly criminal. The image of failure looms large over Christ’s thorn-crowned head. Yet it was precisely the cross of Christ that St. Andrew of Crete calls Christ’s trophy. Rather than a sign of his failure, the cross becomes the literal instrument of victory and the memory of the battle won. If Jesus kept a trophy case of his victories, his cross would feature front and center.

On the cross, Jesus undid the knot tied by our first parents in the garden. Every element of their tying the knot of sin was employed

This is God’s strength: turning to the good everything that happens to us, even the bad things. He brings serenity into our storms, because with God life never dies.

- Pope Francis Extraordinary Urbi et Orbi

by Jesus to untie the knot to set us free. Our sins, our guilt, and our shame are all wiped away by the priestly activity of his cross.

Thus, the cross of Christ is his victory, and it can be our victory too if only we accept it. The requirement of this acceptance is total surrender, to lose our life in order to find it (Mt 10:39).

Surrender does not work in half measures. Anything less than complete surrender will often have the opposite effect than what he desires for us.

Life with Christ is the greatest adventure a person can have.

Adventure is not about planning every small detail of a trip and then executing the itinerary to perfection. That has nothing of the excitement and wonder of adventure. A life of adventure with Christ demands that we trust in him as the best of guides and surrender ourselves completely to following his plan. He will take us to places we could never have imagined. It may not always be fun or pleasant – no adventure can be without the cross – but it will definitely be glorious. “Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. All of us, gazing with unveiled face on the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory (2 Cor 3:17-18).

Retreatant Question: How do I find the Cross of Christ in the midst of my son’s suicide?

Fr. Simon: I’m sorry... There is no pain like that. I would invite you to enter into the experience of Mary. While Christ didn’t commit suicide, he willed his own death; he said “yes” to it. Mary, knowing that Jesus could have done something to prevent the Cross on Calvary, had to willingly watch her Son walk toward death. Ask Mary to walk with you. There’s a beautiful pamphlet by Fr. Chris Alar, MIC, of the Marian Helpers, Divine Mercy After Suicide; in it he points out that God is outside of time, while we are in it. While this is difficult to wrap our minds around, this means we can pray for mercy for both what will happen and what has happened. We have to trust that God can bring good from even the most difficult and confusing of circumstances... I know that God’s mercy is bigger than whatever our sufferings are. Thank you for your question and know that we are praying for you.

Watch Fr. Simon’s full talk with Q&A at Kansasmonks.org/simontalk Have questions? Email us at info@kasnsasmonks.org Summer 2020

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Holy Week Retreat-in-Pl ace 2020

The Resurrection:

A Journey We Must Make

by Fr. Jay Kythe Often we talk about examining a situation “in retrospect.”

What if we viewed the passion and death of the Lord from the point of view of the Resurrection? What would that look like? That would mean that we would have to look at everything that Christ redeemed from the position of victory. This is looking at something from the perspective of Divine Providence, from God’s own point of view. Is this even possible? Only God can reveal this to us, as he did to two disciples on their journey with Jesus on the road to Emmaus (Luke 24). Jesus tells them that “All this had to happen.”

Christ had to suffer and die and rise again, so that we could live, free from the domain and enslavement of sin. Can we say the same thing about all the events of our life—the good, the bad, and the ugly events—that they all had to happen, for reasons greater than what we can imagine, ultimately for our salvation? We must explore our human journey from this angle, from the perspective of Resurrection Victory and the place of Divine Providence. It is a journey we must make!

Clearly the current events of our life are downright ugly.

There is the reality of the pandemic, of sickness and death that generates fear within us. There is also the reality of our struggle with sin. And God inserts Himself into all of

This Abbey Church in which we are gathered is that empty tomb filled with the joy proclaimed in the Exsultet.

This empty tomb is the whole world, and indeed the entire cosmos, created anew by the resurrection of Jesus.

This empty tomb is where all God’s promises through the prophets are realized in us in this night, where God pledges, “…I will give you a new heart and place a new spirit within you…”

This empty tomb is where we were buried with Christ in Baptism, “so that just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might live in newness of life.”

All is different, yet all is the same!

- Abbot James Albers Easter Vigil Homily

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this, into the human reality of brokenness.

God Himself chooses to suffer and to die.

But in order to understand this from the perspective of Resurrection Victory, examine all the beautiful artwork and iconography of the Resurrected Christ, and you will see something incredible: he still has the marks of his wounded flesh on his Resurrected Body! These marks are trophies of victory, marks that sin and death have not had the last word! We may also see him holding—not carrying—His Cross! The instrument of his Passion and Death has become a trophy for Him, showing it to the world to give others hope for a share in that same Resurrected glory. In a way he cries out, “This has not overcome Me!” When we see the Resurrected Christ, we see someone who has made it through the valley of the shadow of death. And when I am asked to walk through it, the Good Shepherd walks before me, with his crook and his staff to comfort me. At that moment I look up at the hands that hold that shepherd’s staff, and they are pierced hands.

This is One I can trust to lead me through difficult times, especially through times such as these.

We are called to keep our eyes on Jesus. Recall the story of Jesus walking on water from Matthew 14. The disciples are frightened when they see Him. In response he says to them, “Take heart, it is I; do not be afraid.” These are encouraging words from Jesus Himself to hold on to during these days of the pandemic, when we may feel fear and anxiety. Even St. Peter had to keep his gaze on Jesus, for when he gets distracted by the wind and the waves, he begins to sink.

There is an important lesson in this for us: All is well when we keep our eyes fixed on God. We must gaze on God, who never ceases to gaze on us. However, it takes only a nanosecond to remove our gaze, and fear (and a whole host of the seven deadly sins) floods our hearts immediately!

These deadly sins are compelling; they grab us and threaten not to let us go. But it also takes only a nanosecond to return to that gaze, for the gaze of God hasn’t left us. Even if the worst should happen, that we will sink under the water and drown, we will still be well. We will remain in his gaze for eternity.

If I stand with Christ in his Resurrection Victory and examine my life and the world, considering all the bad things that have happened and are currently happening, how do I handle the bad memories? I may turn to him and ask, “Was that suffering you went through on that Friday afternoon traumatic for you?” I would think that he would answer, “No. It was not traumatic. It simply was. It is now a memory, perhaps even a bad memory. But it needed to happen for the salvation of the world.”

Thanks be to God that this is the same night in which we receive the Light of Life, the Resurrection Mystery, rather than passing us by, envelopes us and we become one with the Light, running with that Light so that the darkness of death might never overtake us again.

- Abbot James Albers • Easter Vigil Homily

Consider how we often end up nourishing bad memories.

They become traumatic memories because we tell ourselves the ugly stories over and over again. We do the same when we hold grudges. We tell ourselves and anyone who is within earshot that bad story. And it stays bad. It doesn’t have the chance to become just a memory of an experience. This is a distinction we see in the Gospels. The Gospels don’t describe the crucifixion in gory detail. They don’t speak of how he was pierced by nails, bleeding profusely, in agony on the Cross, unable to breathe. Rather they simply state, “and he was crucified.” It is a story of an experience. No details needed.

The pandemic one day will simply just become a story.

A story that is a chapter in a larger story, one that began with Creation and will end with the Book of Revelation. If the Bible were a timeline of human life, somewhere after the last epistle and the Book of Revelation would be our life. We would find ourselves caught up in a larger drama of salvation.

If we could hold on to this concept, we would see that our current state of affairs, including all the ugly deaths that are occurring, are part of something greater, something amazing!

In The Lord of the Rings by J.R.R. Tolkien, two of the main characters, Sam and Frodo, have a realization of this during a dark part of their journey (The Two Towers, Book IV, Chapter VIII: The Stairs of Cirith Ungol). Sam and Frodo have the following conversation (the whole section is worth reading!): ‘Yes, that’s so,’ said Sam. ‘And we shouldn’t be here at all, if we’d known more about it before we started. But I suppose it’s often that way. The brave things in the old tales and songs, Mr. Frodo: adventures, as I used to call them. … Folk seem to have been just landed in them, usually – their paths were laid that way, as you put it. But I expect they had lots of chances, like us, of turning back, only they didn’t. And if they had, we shouldn’t know, because they’d have been forgotten. We hear about those as just went on – and not all to a good end, mind you; at least not to what folk inside a story and not outside it call a good end. … I wonder what sort of a tale we’ve fallen into? … Why, sir, I never thought of that before! … Why, to think of it, we’re in the same tale still! It’s going on.

Don’t the great tales never end?’

‘No, they never end as tales,’ said Frodo. ‘But the people in them come, and go when their part’s ended. Our part will end later – or sooner.’

Christ in Glory by Giotto The same can be said of us. We’re in a story that began tragically, with the Fall. There was a fantastic climactic moment of a Savior-Warrior, God Incarnate, defeating the Enemy! There are many stories that describe the events of the Triduum from the perspective of Divine Providence, from the perspective of Christ’s victory. The Exsultet from the Easter Vigil is one such story. Others are written by Early Church Fathers. My favorite one is the “Ancient Homily on Holy Saturday” (you can find this online easily or in the Liturgy of the Hours).

Seeing our lives as part of this great story of salvation puts everything into perspective. We are learning the art of trustful surrender to his providential will. Here is a challenge to you, a most difficult challenge. “If I had access to all the wisdom and knowledge of God, I would DEMAND that things happen EXACTLY the way they have.” Can I say that about the pandemic? Can I say that about the tragedies that I have experienced? Can I say that about my life? It is indeed a most difficult challenge! But it is a way that I can say, “Yes, Lord, Thy will, not mine, be done.” And it can only be done when I stay with him, in the gaze of his merciful love, and refuse to leave him.

Watch Fr. Jay’s talk with Q&A or read the unabridged version at Kansasmonks.org/jaytalk Have questions? Email us at info@kasnsasmonks.org Summer 2020

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t esen r f p ks o abbey n o m ’s the nedict he t e b . st

s ’ t o b ab ble ta 21

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21 , 20 k 0 1 il r apr nd pa ter en rla ove tion c ven con presenting the lumen vitae medal to sr. irene nowell, osb and dr. scott & kimberly hahn

Time is like a river, it is how we navigate these waters that shapes us, defines us – God has set us on a path, of what was, what is, and what is yet to be – equipped with a one thousand five hundred year legacy of prayer and work, we the monks of St. Benedict’s Abbey have one, simple mission, to glorify God. This was how we planned to address you at the 2020 Abbot’s Table – with a message of gratitude – thanksgiving for making this 1,500-year-old mission of glorifying God a reality. Indeed you are our partners in this mission – you have supported us, you have prayed with us, you have been a part of our family – and for this, we wish to say it again, because we cannot say it enough, thank you!

As we complete this issue of Kansas Monks, the future is not totally certain, but one thing that we do know is that our Lumen Vitae Medal recipients will be present to accept their awards at the 2021 Abbot’s Table. We could not be more excited to celebrate the lives, service, and incredible Christian witness of Sr. Irene Nowell as well as Scott and Kimberly Hahn. These people truly know what it means to run with the light of life and bring the Gospel to bear in our world today!

Many have reached out to ask about our financial well-being with the absence of this great event; while it is a celebration of the service of our honorees and of all of our contributions, both yours and those of my brother monks, to the world, it also serves as the principal fundraiser to support our prayer and work. As the April 2020 event approached we were blessed with not one, but two, $200,000 matching gifts! These incredible donors have stepped forward to help make our prayer and work a reality, and help all of our other friends and benefactors triple their own donations! What an incredible gift! If you are able, I ask that you prayerfully consider a donation toward this challenge match, and share the good work that my brother monks are doing with your friends and family, that they may also partner with us to bring the love of Christ to the world that so desperately needs his grace and love. To make a gift to the $200,000 Challenge, please visit Kansasmonks.org/challenge or return your gift in the enclosed envelope.

Mass 4:00 p.m.

Reception 5:15 p.m.

Program & Dinner 6:30 p.m.

Overland Park Convention Center 6000 College Blvd, Overland Park, KS 66211 kansasmonks.org/abbotstable 913.360.7897 30

Kansas Monks

Further, I invite you to save the new date for Abbot’s Table VIII: April 10, 2021, at the Overland Park Convention Center.

Please know of our prayers for you and for your family, especially during this time of pandemic and social distancing. If you have prayer requests, send them to us at prayers@kansasmonks.org and we will add them to our daily list.

I would also like to invite you to have a Mass offered for a friend or loved one here at the Abbey – in a time when we are not able to welcome you into the Abbey phyically for Mass, we can continue to offer your intentions up in a special way: visit Kansasmonks.org/Mass to request a Mass for any intention.

In Christ,

Abbot James R. Albers, OSB

ONE LEGACY ONE FUTURE P A R TN E R WI T H US T O ME E T T HIS $2 0 0 ,000 CHA LLE NG E

For more than 160 years monks of St. Benedict’s Abbey have staked their lives on the truth of the Gospel; together, we can ensure that this ora et labora, this prayer and work of bettering the world through authentic Christian service and prayer can continue for 160 years more.

We ask you to consider helping us meet this $200,000 challenge and ensure that all we serve might run with the light of life.

LIF T Y O U R I NT E NT I ONS T O G OD IN T HE H O L Y S ACRI FI CE OF T HE MASS

V ISI T KANSASMONKS.ORG/MASS FO R I N F O O R T O RE QUE S T A MASS

thank you to our underwriters

K a ns a s M o n ks

Mike & The re sa Mu r p hy Fami ly Ter r y & Michelle S exton

F o u n d e r ’ s T ab le

Michael R . & Marly s Hav e r ty Fam ily Fou nd ati on

A b b o t’ s T a ble

B ene d ic tine Colle ge John & Tere sa G illc r i s t Fami ly J E D u nn Constr u c ti on Ur y a sz Fam ily Fou nd ati on

P r io r ’ s G u ild

Archdiocese of Kansas City in Kansas L ar r y & Tre sa Bu e s si ng Dr. Pau l & Kare n C amarat a Cou ntr y C lu b B a nk S e an & Ju lie D oher ty Ter r y & Pe g g y D unn E xchang e B ank & Tr u st Frank & L ind a Franko Ku ckelm an Torline Ki rk l and Attor ne y s At L aw Mc Anany C onstr u c ti on MG P Fr ie nd s of the Abb e y Jack & Kathy N e w man O ’Malle y B e v era ge Ke v in and C o c o O’Malle y Rob e r t G . Ro one y Sisters of Mount St. Scholastica Monastery Wad d ell & Re e d Financ i a l Adv i s ors Ro s c o Hal s e y B ob & Jane t W hole y Summer 2020

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St. Benedict’s Abbey Atchison, Kansas 1020 N. 2nd Street, Atchison, KS 66002 Kansas Monks USPS 290-760 Abbey Advancement Office 913.367.7853 kan sa sm o n k s . or g

the

Summer 2020 | Volume 14 | Number 1

Return to Nazareth prayer garden

Additional info, photos, and groundbreaking video at kansasmonks.org/nazareth

“For the last 60 years, the monks have been a part of my life, not just from a religious perspective, but more importantly as friends. For a number of years my wife, Mary Alice (at left, second from right), has been saying “we should put up a roadside chapel somewhere.” During a retreat at the Abbey, I was taking a walk at the east overlook and thought, “this would be a great place for something!” The Gospel of Jesus in the temple struck me at that time and I had an image in my mind of the Holy Family walking down the path on the east lawn. Abbot James brought in architecture students from Benedictine College and they transformed my vision into something beyond my imagination – it was incredible! I look forward to the completion of the project and the dedication in the fall of 2020.” -Mike Easterday (at left, center)