Kamloops Momma Issue 15 by Kamloops Momma Magazine

October/November 2012

Top 5 Car Seat No-Noâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s

Getting Grounded

And how you can avoid them

(In a Good Way)

Holiday Gift Guide

(p.14)

Finding the Joy

s a kid, Halloween was my very favourite holiday. I’d keep an eye on our tickle trunk year round in hopes of putting together the perfect costume. When Halloween finally arrived, my sister and I would rush home from school, put on our costumes and wait in anticipation of the first trick or treater to arrive at our door, signalling that it was now time for us to go out too. We’d grab our pillowcases and run to our neighbour’s house. They always gave us an advent calendar for Halloween, which, of course, never lasted until December. Then we’d carry on, making sure we went to the houses with the best decorations and trying to remember who gave out the big chocolate bars! Letter from a As our pillowcases neared the top, we’d snicker at the kids Kamloops with little plastic pumpkin baskets, though ours did get pretty Momma heavy! After what seemed like hours and hours - when ‘We ran out of candy’ signs starting appearing on doors - we’d finally head home with our loot. Then we’d dump everything on the living room floor for our mom to inspect: we were not allowed to have a single bite until my mom gave the okay. Then the real fun began: sorting the candy. Yes, I would categorize my candy - by brand, flavour, and size. Then I would systematically eat it until it was gone. You see, I didn’t really have a lot of self-control when it came to treats so, after a week, the only things left were Tootsie Roll Pops and raisins! But once I hit high school, the joy of Halloween began to slip away. Categorizing candy certainly wasn’t cool, nor was eating an entire pillowcase full! It all ended for me in grade 8: I was trick or treating with my friends and the boy I had a crush on drove by. I turned my face in embarrassment, hoping that he didn’t see me. I don’t know if he actually did, but I do know that I never went door to door again. Then in the years that followed, Halloween became about crazy parties and skimpy outfits, neither of which were my very favourite things! Yes, I had grown to dislike the holiday that I had once loved so much. Even meeting my future-husband, whose birthday is Halloween, didn’t change my feelings. Then, as the saying goes, everything changed when I had a baby. I pretty much began planning my daughter’s Halloween costume when she was born. At 5 months old, she was absolutely adorable in a handmade (by my momma!) Tinker Bell costume, while I was Wendy and my Husband, Peter Pan. The joy that I felt this first year with a child has continued to grow, as has my need to come up with ‘family’ costumes! As this holiday approaches each year, I am truly grateful that witnessing a child’s joy can remind us of the childlike sense of wonder we once had. Kids really do make everything (well, most things) better! -- Courtney Charlton, editor To share your ideas and comments, contact us at info@kamloopsmomma.com or find us on Facebook!

On the Cover:

This adorable little guy is enjoying a trip to O’ Keefe Ranch with his photographer momma, Sara. Sara is the owner of Life Unfolding Photography. She does it all and does it all well. From specialized birth photography to boudoir and the less than perfect toddlers. She believes that your photographer should always be evolving and most importantly your session should be a truly fun experience that leaves your and your kids feeling beautiful. www.lifeunfolding.ca

A Look Inside Kamloops Momma...

Dylan

Isabelle, 6

Clara, 5 months

Nathan, 3

Not a Walk in the Park

Moms with Cameras: Who am I?

A mom’s perspective

A year-long course for budding photographers

Getting Grounded...in a good way

The Air They Breathe

Kindness is Contagious

Top 5 Car Seat No-No’s

Teaching Children to Respect Possessions

Simple Ingredients for a Family History

What to Get the Child Who Has Everything

Kindergarten Stole My Grandchild

Let Me Introduce Myself...

Bringing Kamloops’ Sexy Back: Revealed

At the Yoga Loft

A concerned citizen’s perspective It’s Cool to Be Kind Week

And how you can avoid them

The KamloopsParents.com BTDT Squad shares how Dough Art Creations

Gifts that are sure to please A nana’s perspective

The life of a ‘childless momma’ Nicola

Resources:

Isabella, 6

14 Gift Guide 2012 21 Birthday Party Directory 24 Dear Aunty 30 Community Events Calendar

Kamloops Momma is the fun, reliable publication connecting local families to each other and to our community. We provide information about regional events, resources and businesses, as well as articles intended to inspire, enlighten and empower parents and caregivers. As a local resource, we want our community to get involved. We encourage and accept submissions from any person, business, or organization sharing our goal to strengthen our parenting community. Kamloops Momma is published every 2 months and available for free at businesses and resource centres throughout our region. Readers can also download the magazine online and subscribe to have it delivered right to their door. 6

16 Things We Love 23 Notes from a Boho Momma 28 Community Resource Directory

Kamloops Momma Magazine

Published by Courtney Charlton, editor Contact: info@kamloopsmomma.com 778.472.0020

Disclaimer: The publisher will not be responsible for errors or omissions. The opinions and views expressed herein are those of the contributors/writers and do not necessarily reflect the opinions or views of the publisher. All rights reserved. No written or illustrated part of this magazine may be reproduced, except brief quotations in articles or reviews, without permission from the editor and individual authors.

www.kamloopsmomma.com

NOT a Walk in the Park A Mom’s Perspective Photo: Jessica Schlamp Photography By Rebecca Spooner

have long been under the misguided impression that my adorable little brood of children are a joy and wonder to all we meet. All ‘baby-less’ couples we know, Jonathan and I innocently assume that a simple visit from us will soothe all their fears and make them long for a family of their own. But then we visited a friend’s house... I decided to dress all my children and take them to a friend’s goodbye open house. The beginning of the day should have been a clear indicator, but my sleep deprived brain failed to pick up the classic signals and, instead, I persevered. Getting ready is an hour-long endeavour involving stress, palpitations, minor hyperventilation, and a whole lot of sweating. I dressed Malakai and moved on to choosing Caleb’s clothes. As Caleb dressed himself, I went to help Selah, trying to rip the knots of leftover food and gum out of her hair so I could attempt to put it up. After much complaining (on both our parts) I returned to the boys’ bedroom to find Caleb with his pants half on, playing with his cars and watching a show. Trying to maintain my sanity, I turned off the TV, made a few mindless threats about, “we’ll stay home if you don’t hurry up!” (which, by the way, have NO effect whatsoever) and moved on to getting myself ready. For this part, I am slowly learning to shut the bathroom door and lock the chaos out for a few minutes. This morning I remembered this time-saving manoeuvre and was quite proud of myself as I applied many layers of makeup to hide the bags under my eyes and the hormone zits. I walked out of the bathroom feeling somewhat human only to find Caleb yet again half dressed, preoccupied with some thing or another, and Selah and Malakai fighting in the bathroom behind me. Upon returning to the said bathroom, I found my adorable toddler throwing cups, toys, and other items into the toilet and flushing it with grandeur. Selah was screaming in terror, horrified at what her little brother had done, and I was rushing in with my hand down the toilet (freshly

used, I might add) trying to dig out the remains of this small catastrophe. Crises averted. Shutting the bathroom door, a little too forcefully, I go back to the boys’ room and find Caleb has finally dressed himself and we are ready to progress to the second stage of dressing: the front door. Herding my little brood, I go to the front and deal with Malakai’s meltdowns, Caleb running out without his jacket, Selah whining in abandon that she “can’t do it” and myself feeling slightly overwhelmed trying to complete the task in record time - and we still have a 20 minute walk ahead of us! “Deep breath Rebecca, this will pass, just get them outside,” my inner self speaks reason. It sounds so nice and calm, my outer self feels like hitting it with a large baseball bat. Finishing my feat, I make sure I have all my supplies and get the kids into the stroller and begin my walk. I’ll save you every single detail of the day, but suffice it to say we got there in one piece. My kids even made it most of the way through the visit without destroying the house or embarrassing me. I was starting to feel relaxed, proud even of my “good little kids.” And then it happened. The true essence of my life emerged. I sit, I stand, I sit, I stand. Caleb is licking Nanaimo bars off the table, leaving a smear of chocolate all over his little face and stuck fast to the table. Selah is stealing trinkets and putting them in her purse. Malakai is taking toys and throwing them into the toilet. Selah is screaming because her shirt strings on her back made her sure she had a bee on her bum as she went potty! After soothing her and fishing my SECOND item from the depths of toilet (also freshly used), I decide the time has come to leave. I get the kids dressed yet again, boots on, shoes on, socks on, coats on... and Caleb walks through the house leaving a trail of mud. I scolded him and told him to sit on the front step, which he did so well, only he chose the second step, smearing his muddy shoes all over the carpet. Malakai and Selah are eating chips with vigor,

leaving a trail of crumbs all over the landing. All my embarrassed inner-self can think of is “retreat, retreat!” So we do, and as we make the trip back to the safety of my home, which can surely be destroyed no more than it already has... I think to myself, “It’s true, I really am crazy!” 4 kids 5 and under! No wonder everyone looks at us as though we are losing our minds, we really are. And, yet, as I look at my kids asleep in their beds, peaceful and so darned cute, I wouldn’t change it for the world. Do I expect to bring my kids over and “endear” my friends to have kids? No, I think those days of naivety are over. The only testimony that I can give for our insanity is this: Our lives are chaos. Every day is an adventure, often ending with at least some form of bodily fluid on me, kids screaming all day long, and a house that is DESTROYED. And, yet, we choose to have more kids. What greater testimony to family can I have than that? Despite the list of crazy that goes on in my home (you don’t even WANT to know the half of it), we love it. And so it is that I finally let go of my misguided ideas that our kids are a compelling force to have a large family. Instead, when people ask if I am crazy, I will nod and smile in the knowledge that although not everyone understands, I wouldn’t trade my chaos for the world! About Rebecca: I am homeschooling, stay-at-home mother of four young children 5 and under. I am not a ‘super mom.’ I don’t get it all right. I am not up at the break of dawn always looking perfect and holding my world together with my apron strings. No, I fail, I flounder; I try to make it through each day with a semblance of dignity and sanity in tact (some days I even get a shower!). Each day is a new adventure that keeps me laughing, guessing, pulling my hair out, and occasionally climbing my walls… but it is never boring! If you are interested in more stories of my own personal mayhem, check out my blog at http://spoonerclan.blogspot.com Thanks for reading!

Photos (left to right) Adoption Papers by Valoree Bloomfield; Fertility by Katie Cavaletto

Moms with Cameras:

Who am I? By Sara Schriener, Life Unfolding Photography

s a little girl I imagined my life. I dreamed, like my own two young daughters do now, of who I would be. The magical grown up version of myself had four perfect kids who ran around a perfectly groomed yard with their golden retriever. My rock star husband strummed to me on his guitar and my job as a journalist took me around the world. I can still close my eyes and hear my little friends calling out, ‘I get to be rich!’ ‘I get to be I get to be princes Di!’ and, ‘I get to marry Michael Jackson!’ as we set our roles in our imaginary world of playing house. Yes, I am coming up on forty years of age and I am a child of the early eighties. In defence of my six year old self, this was in the days of “Thriller” and before Michael had a nose job. I knew when I asked my ‘Moms’ to create the most difficult assignment yet, a

piece entitled ‘Who Am I,’ it would be a subject they had not likely thought about since they were also young girls imagining who they would become. So many things have changed the course of where we imagined our lives would take us: infertility, illness, jobs, moves, kids, spouses who are real people and not the imaginary ones we created so perfectly in our imaginations, unexpected failures and unexpected success. We play so many different roles for other people, it slowly becomes difficult to recognize our own self in the expectations of the people around us. I knew this assignment would take some serious soul searching and require some raw honesty. It would take guts to really pull it off. Like so many women, motherhood and adulthood are not how I dreamed them. This life, these kids and my husband are

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nothing like I expected. I am not who I imagined I would grow to be. I fell in love with a grown man riding a BMX bike to work. I hold my breathe every morning praying for my chronically sick child to wake up yet, like every other mom, I look forward to my children’s bedtime with great anticipation. My five year old son declares his undying love so many times in a day it is all I can do not to plug my ears with frustration and peel him from my leg. I work too many hours, not writing magnificent pieces exposing government corruption, and trying to avoid the glares coming from the three small sets of eyes watching me from the office doorway. Yet how lucky am I to not be travelling the world; to turn in my seat and make a face so that they run away yelping and screaming. My husband is no rock star but when he finally

Photos (Top left to right) Self Portrait by Jocelyn Gordon; Presentation and Reality by Jill Byrd; Silence by Christina Masse, Looking Back by Sherri Hoffer; Words by Rayne McDonnell

turned over the motor on his 67 Mustang, that had sat in our yard for 15 years, he certainly looked like one. And while I don’t document the world with a pen like I imagined, I do document the world around me through an art form that is always evolving. This life that has unfolded is, with all it’s unexpected paths, filled with kids who laugh and love each other just minutes after declaring they will never speak again. These imperfect kids, one who’s physical internal imperfection is life threatening, are awesome. Not just a little bit, but hugely, truly, awesome. They drive me crazy with frustration and but even more crazy with the knowledge that I can love so incredibly much. I didn’t imagine it this way as a little girl because I didn’t know that the imperfect parts of life are what make us so grateful for the best parts. It is the unexpected turns that

make us stronger women, even those moments we believe we may never come back from. The most frightening moments of my life have been, in retrospect, the most defining in building the woman that I am. The hardest moments are the most important. I am not rich or perfect or a Giller Prize winning writer. I have a sick child who may never get better. My husband looks nothing like Bon Jovi. This morning I wished we had the dog if only to clean up the mess of Cheerios on my kitchen floor. I am impatient and filled with mother’s guilt and loving and kind and generous and selfish and a million imperfect things. I am so many things I never imagined I would be. I am so much more real. The mom’s in my class were honest in a vulnerable way that most of us are not brave enough to be.

None of them are Giller Prize writers. They don’t need to be. In just six months of classes they created images that tell as much about themselves as a written piece; pieces that allow the viewer to find parts of themselves in the image. The work they created made me so proud that I didn’t submit a piece of my own. Their work says it for me: I am a million different things to different people but these images show I am something I never expected to be: a teacher. And these moms? These moms are all artists. Moms with Camera’s is a twelve month class that begins again in February 2013. The class teaches both the technical and artistic aspects of photography. Early registration, $700.00, is available until November 27th. After November 27th registration is $800.00.

The Pond Country Market and Life Unfolding present a FUNdraiser to support Mikayla, who has been living with Type 1 Diabetes for 8 years.

October 24 from 9 am to 4pm 6231 Barnhartvale Rd. Halloween Mini sessions, a pumpkin, hot chocolate, crafts and a Haunted House ALL for $40.00

Profits to benefit the Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation and Mikayla’s Hope for a Cure! Leave the site with your three images on CD. Professional gardeners will be on site teaching free seminars on how to winter your garden. Advertising Feature

Getting Grounded (in a good way)

By Marcia Wilson

Photos by Kelly Funk Photography

y journey to the creation of The Yoga Loft was a process of self reflection, hard work, personal evolution and an amazing array of life experiences. Add in a beautiful studio setting and a passion for creating community and you find The Yoga Loft. Like you, I am a mom. I’ve worn many hats: non-profit Executive Director, occupational therapist, triathlete, outdoor enthusiast, and community builder. Each of these adventures has shaped me. But, ultimately, it’s my role as a mom that keeps me honest. How I show up in my relationships with my husband and my two teenagers is the real test. When I am stressed or tired I become crabby and impatient - or, as I teach kids at our studio, I am not ‘grounded.’ At The Yoga Loft, being ‘grounded’ is a good thing. Grounded means being aware of who we are, how we are showing up in our actions and speech, and how we can shift things when we are having a bad day. Through the practice of yoga, adults and kids learn how to to bring themselves into their most optimal state of being. Tired, bored, sad? Strong poses like warrior and one-handed down dogs help to activate us. Wound up, hyper, overstimulated? Calming poses like ‘Just Breathe,’ ‘Breath of Joy’ and ‘Savasana’ help to calm and regulate our nervous system. Kids who are grounded know when they need calming, focussing, or energizing poses. Parents who are grounded know when when they need a strong and energizing yoga practice, and when they need to relax deeply. Parents and teachers often speak about the challenges kids have dealing with stress and anxiety. Many kids and adults don’t know how to calm themselves, relax, and breathe. In the same way that we need to exercise and physically build our bodies, our generations in particular need to actively learn techniques to destress and calm. People who practice yoga come to the mat for many reasons. My first ventures were very much aligned with my triathlon passion. Yoga gave me strength and flexibility and was the perfect addition to my training. When my work responsibilities expanded and stress levels went up, my yoga shifted to an interest in the stories and philosophies of yoga and ideas about how I could live my life differently. Now in my 40’s, my yoga is very much about honouring hormonal changes and the ongoing challenges of parenting, working, and living my life passionately. My one big lesson from the mat? Yoga keeps you honest. When you find yourself dozing deeply in savasana, you are reminded that you are not getting enough sleep. When you forget to eat lunch and find your after-work practice challenged by energy levels, you are reminded of the importance of eating. When you feel a deep sense of peace at the end of class, you become more aware of ways that you navigate life that invite stress and tension, or peace and calm. The reality? Learning to be grounded takes practice. Learning to draw on inner strength or to relax deeply takes practice. Even learning how to take a calming, full breath takes practice. At the Yoga Loft you will find a wide array of classes 7 days a week - each which can help you and your family find the space and time to get grounded (in a good way). The Yoga Loft is located at 201-409 Seymour Street (4th & Seymour in the old Elks building). Open 7 days a week, you can find all the details about programs at www.youryogaloft.com.

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The Air They Breathe

A Concerned Citizen’s Perspective By Elma Schemenauer n bad-air days in Salt Lake City, Cherise Udell felt like her children were in a windowless room full of chain smokers. That’s why she started the organization Utah Moms for Clean Air. 1 The Moms, along with Utah Physicians for Healthy Environment and others, are suing Kennecott Utah Copper over polluted air from its open-pit mine. The Kennecott mine is 45 km from Salt Lake City. Mine spokesperson Kyle Bennett says it operates according to “established standards.” 2 Yet fugitive dust associated with the mine creates health problems for Salt Lake City residents, especially children. The proposed Ajax open-pit copper mine would be much closer to Kamloops than Kennecott is to Salt Lake City. In fact, half of the Ajax mine would be within city limits. It would be about 1.5 km from the nearest houses and school (Pacific Way Elementary). That’s like from the Royal Inland Hospital to the Red Bridge. The prevailing southwest winds would carry dust from the mine throughout the city and up the north and east valleys. Dr. Judith Naylor is a retired Kamloops paediatrician. She says, “Children are more vulnerable to breathable dust than adults. Dust in the air worsens existing asthma and causes respiratory infections in those not otherwise predisposed to them. It also decreases lung function in children, and over time may permanently reduce it.” KGHM Ajax Mining promises to “develop a dust mitigation plan that meets or exceeds current best management practices.” 3.Unfortunately “best management practices” means only controlling dust as well as other mines do (hopefully better). The level of hazardous materials in our air, water, soil, and locally grown food would inevitably increase. This is borne out by the experiences of other people in communities near openpit mines. Air quality problems could be especially severe in Kamloops because of our particular situation: 1. Our city is downwind and down-slope of the proposed mine. 2. We’re in a valley that is subject to temperature inversions, which trap the air near the surface. 3. This air already contains emissions from the pulp mill and cement plant, and sometimes smoke from forest fires and grass fires. 4. Our climate is dry, which means we have many exposed areas with little or no plant cover. Such areas are dusty and the dust enters the air, as Valleyview residents have said in recent letters to the newspaper. The huge quantities of bedrock that Ajax would mine contain heavy metals: arsenic, cadmium, lead, and others. These would be present at the mine itself and in the wind-blown air. Dr. Kelly Orringer, a former resident of Kamloops, teaches paediatrics at the University of Michigan. She says, “In specific concentrations…heavy metals can cause serious health risks.

Many of them lead to irreversible damage and sometimes death. Children are particularly susceptible to heavy metal illnesses as are pregnant women.” 4 Following are examples of heavy-metal effects: 1. Arsenic is associated with birth defects, cancer, and damage to the nervous system. 2. Cadmium promotes lung cancer and liver damage. 3. Lead slows children’s intellectual development, and interferes with memory and concentration. The Ajax mine promises 580 direct jobs during construction and 380 during operation. 5 That’s about the same number of jobs as were created in Kamloops in only one recent month, August 2012. 6 Daddy or Momma might get one of the mining jobs and make good money. But is it worth it if our city’s children gasp for breath, struggle in school, and strain a health-care system challenged by the loss of doctors who move their families to cleaner, healthier communities? Lillian Kwan teaches grade 3 at Dufferin Elementary, just across Highways 1 and 5 from the proposed mine. She’s been teaching for 35-plus years and notes there are more children with asthma now than in the past. “We live in a pretty toxic environment,” Kwan says. “We don’t need to add more toxins.” Kwan feels the proposed mine would be too close to where too many families live. “Children don’t have a choice in their circumstances,” she says. “It’s up to adults to protect and advocate for them. Parent Advisory Councils could become more involved with this issue. If PACs from Kamloops schools met to discuss concerns, they would be a united voice for our children. Making a presentation to the school board is one avenue through which to share concerns.” So far the public debate on the proposed mine has lacked much of a voice for Kamloops children. The time to express concerns is now, before government officials make a final decision on whether to approve the mine’s application or not. 4 www.stopajaxmine.ca/blog, July 10, 2012 5 Ajax Copper-Gold Project Fact Booklet 6 Kamloops Daily News, Sept. 8, 2012

1 http://blog.utahmomsforcleanair.org/about/ 2 Deseret News, Dec. 19, 2011 3 Ajax Copper-Gold Project Fact Booklet

Kindness is Contagious By Amy-Jean Fournier

indness is contagious. Interior Community Services invites all of Kamloops to embrace the idea of it’s “Cool to be Kind.” The City of Kamloops has proclaimed October 1-6 as Kamloops Cool to Be Kind Week. During this week, the wonderful people of Kamloops are encouraged to perform random acts of kindness; for kindness sake! It’s less about the specific act and rather about the intentional purpose of being kind. There are endless random acts that can be performed and they can be intended for a family member or friend, a co-worker or employee, a child, senior or a complete stranger. Schools and day cares, agencies and organizations along with larger corporations are encouraged to use this week as an opportunity to recognize kindness and pay it forward.

Interior Community Services will be joined with “live on location broadcast” by Radio NL at the North shore A&W on October 1, 2012 to launch the week. Kamloops will be asked to join us in exploring new and exciting ways to practice random acts of kindness. Stories will be reminisced, suggestions will be offered and the many benefits of participating in Cool to be Kind Week will be shared. On Thursday October 4, 2012, staff at Interior Community Services, with the generosity of supporting local businesses, will be hosting a free luncheon and warm clothing donation. If you are an individual or business who would like to contribute to this event or have warm outer wear to donate please contact Amy-Jean Fournier at Interior Community Services, 250-554-3134.

“No kind action ever stops with itself. One kind action leads to another. Good example is followed. A single act of kindness throws out roots in all directions, and the roots spring up and make new trees. The greatest work that kindness does to others is that it makes them kind themselves.”

Top 5 Car Seat No-No’s and How You Can Avoid Them

By Jennifer Harbaruk

“No need to adjust the harness...it always fits perfectly!” EEEKKK! Sometimes it takes all of my strength

as a technician NOT to adjust your babies when I see them in their “buckets!” While many parents are diligent about always loosening harnesses to load and then tightening them EACH TIME, some are not. Please make sure you re-adjust the harness every time babe is placed in their seat. You should be able to just slide two fingers under the straps at your child’s collarbone. Remember, on rear facing seats, straps should originate just below the child’s shoulders at the back. On forward facing seats, they should be at the shoulder or slightly above. The chest clip should always be at armpit level.

“Do I really need to tether my forward facing seat?”

Canadian law states that all forward facing child seats must be tethered. Please, please read the owner’s manual that comes with your vehicle for placement, tips and proper anchoring technique. If your older vehicle does not have a designated anchor, most dealerships will install one for you at no cost. If additional anchors cannot be installed, you will have no choice but to make other transportation arrangements.

“What do you mean I can’t use one anchor from the left and one anchor from the right?!” As technicians,

we see this often. Yes, the best place for your child is in the middle of the back seat. However, in this age of compact, ecoefficient, ‘little’ cars, most only have UAS (Universal Anchoring System) anchors for the left and the right seats. In this case, use your middle seat belt to anchor. When you ‘borrow’ a left and a right (unless your vehicle manual allows it), you change the shift of the seat. Our rule of thumb is no more than 1 inch of slide, side-to-side or front to back. By splitting anchors, you will allow for too much movement.

“But my baby will be cold without his cozy, warm bunting bag!” Nothing should come between baby and

the harness strap! EVER! Bulky bunting bags and snowsuits can compress in a crash and baby may be ejected out of the seat. Dress babe in a warm sleeper, a sweater and booties. Load in seat and adjust the harness accordingly. You can then bundle on top...blankets, an elasticized fleece cover, etc. Older children also shouldn’t wear thick puffy jackets when buckled in a car seat. Fleece jackets are perfect for colder weather, and kids can always put their jackets backwards over their arms until the car heats up.

Can you spot the difference?! The photo above, Eve, age 3.5, is ‘car seat tech-approved.’ The bottom photo, Elliot, age 2.5, might not be!

“This seat was only used twice. So what if it’s expired!” Even though a seat may not be used much,

the average lifespan of a car seat is only about 6 years (see Transport Canada website for lifespan by manufacturer). Materials just tend to wear, so please abide by the suggested expiry dates (usually on a sticker, or printed in the moulded plastic). Using an expired seat may void portions of your car insurance should you be involved in a crash. And, the seat will most definitely not be replaced! Jenn Harbaruk is a Car Seat Passenger Safety Technician and owner of Welcome to the Babyhood. For more information or to set up a car seat check, visit www.welcometothebabyhood.com. * Originally published in the 2012 KM Baby Guide.

GIFT GUIDE 2012

Things We Love... {Holiday Gift Edition} Pirate Sock Monkey by Beneath the Monkey Tree

Why do we love it?

Beneath the Monkey Tree makes traditional sock monkey’s with a twist. The adorable monkeys are custom made so you can get (almost) anything you want, even a pirate monkey with a tutu. They are sure to become your child’s new best friend!

Toddler Toys by Discovery Toys

Why do we love it?

We love, love, love Discovery Toys. They’re so durable (and come with a lifetime warranty), brightly coloured and gender-neutral, create so many opportunities for learning, and are just as fun for adults as they are for kids. Featured here is the Sunshine Market, Giant Pegboard, and Measure Up! cups, which are all fantastic for kids 19 months and older.

beneaththemonkeytree@gmail.com

www.discoverytoys.com/ginadillon.com

Perplexus Twist

Why do we love it?

This 4D maze game will excite and challenge players as they twist and realign the tracks to escape tracks, decoys and cliff-hangers. The toys is not only entertaining, it helps with hand-eye coordination and cognitive development too!

www.TumbleweedToys.com Sahali Mall

Ring Sling by Ladybugz Slings ‘n’ Things Why do we love it? The ring sling

is a great gift for new or expectant mothers. It’s adjustable so, unlike many other slings, sizing is easy. It comes in lots of gorgeous materials, molds comfortably to both baby and wearer, and is good for babies and toddlers from 6-36 lbs. Best of all, they are lovingly made by a local momma! www.LadybugzSlings.com

Gift Basket by Iron Orchid Design

Why do we love it?

Iron Orchid Design is a home decor store that specializes in exceptionally unique new, used, and repurposed items. It’s the vision of two artists and their attention to detail and visual eye is remarkable: even the carefully placed feathers in the basket have glass beads attached to them! This basket has ornamental bird-themed treasures, delicious scented candles and sachets and would be a pleasure for anyone to receive. www.IronOrchidDesign.com 408 Seymour St. 16

SImply Said Book by Creative Memories

Why do we love it?

Looking for the perfect gift for someone who ‘has everything’ buts appreciates sentiment? The simply said books are predesigned themed books that you can easily customize. They come with fun quotes, creative writing prompts, and places for photos. www.mycmsite.com/denises

Fairytale Friendship Puzzle by Melissa & Doug

Why do we love it?

Like all Melissa & Doug products, this 24 piece floor puzzle is high-quality and visually appealing. It’s made of thick, durable pieces that can be wiped clean and it’s great for children ages 3+ to enjoy. The Littlest Toy Shop 34-1800 Tranquille Rd

Momma Bundle by Bunches ‘n’ Bundles

Why do we love it? Bunches ‘n’

Bundles searches for the coolest products from home-based or small businesses and creates custom bundles for every budget and occasion. This ‘momma bundle’ has handmade body scrub, soy candles, local tea, bath bars, dryer balls, a manicure GC and more! It truly is a delight to open, especially because it supports so many small businesses! www.bunchesnbundles.com

Jewellery by Latasia

Why do we love it?

Latasia offers fashion jewellery that’s fun and affordable. Whether you’re looking for something for work, a night on the town, or even your wedding, Latasia has something for you. They even have engravable jewellery for babies!

www.mylatasia.ca/rox-annhaines

Hat by Little Birdie Creations

Why do we love it?

This brimmed knit hat is

beautifully crafted with bamboo-silk yarn. It’s not only cute, it’s hands-down the softest hat we have ever felt and we wish it was adult size! Various sizes, colours, and styles are available. fb/littlebirdiechirps

Do you make or sell something that you think we’ll love? Contact us at info@kamloopsmomma.com for more information on how your product could be featured here! 17

How Do You Teach Your Children to Respect Their Possessions? KamloopsParents.com’s ‘Been There Done That’ Squad tells us how they do it!

Tamara: Tamara:I have to admit that teaching our kids to respect their possessions is often compromised in favour of encouraging them to share. I find that when something becomes too precious, my children are less likely to share it freely with others. Similarly, if they are afraid to break my grandmother’s tea cups they won’t set the table for a spontaneous afternoon family tea party. Who knows if it’s the right thing, but we are a home where books get splashed in the tub, heirloom tea cups get broken and toys get lost and forgotten under beds. But, they share brilliantly when others come to play and they are confident using punch bowls and china.  Gerry: Well, I’ll start with respecting the things given to them and I think that starts with appreciating them. We struggle with this, given that my wife and I both come from broken homes, thus 4 sets of Grandparents. My two girls (age 4 and 7) get more than they need, and I am proud of how they still manage to

show appreciation even at the tail end of Christmas (which for us lasts two weeks); after gift number 20 something. Our 4 year-old has remained grateful from day one, and I think it is the great example her sister gives her. Our seven-year old had some moments. Around age 3-4 where she started tossing things aside, or pointing out how they were not exactly what she wanted or asked for. My response was immediate: I pulled her aside and asked her how she would feel if she made something for me and I pointed out what was wrong with it or threw it on the ground; how would she feel? She got it, she felt bad, was embarrassed, cried, and apologized to her Grandpa. Ever since she is genuinely grateful for what she gets.   Joshua: Easy peasy: if they don’t respect their things, they don’t get them. They will get one warning with a conversation so they understand the situation then if it happens again they lose it. Danica: We have not purposefully taught them to respect their possessions, but the kids seem to have picked it up on their own. I think it is because we have taught them that consequences happen and this extends to possessions. If they don’t take care of their stuff it becomes damaged or lost… and then it is damaged or lost. Also, we have been teaching them how to earn and save their own money, which they have used to purchase their own things. Knowing the value of their things helps them to want to take care of their things. Erin: We aren’t a particularly tidy family, so ‘make sure you pick it up and put it in its place” isn’t likely something you’ll hear us say. However, we do attempt to keep our daughter from destroying things (particularly books), by letting her know that books are special, and then lavishing her with crazy praises for putting them away in a gentle manner.   Krystal: Treasure, cherish, respect, these are all words I have used to convey

to my children what it means to care for something. One thing that we have always had was a ‘special shelf.’ This was a long narrow shelf where my kids could display their most precious possessions. Of course it came pre-stocked by me with a photo of me, their dad and them as a baby and other little trinkets that were ‘special’. Both of my kids seemed to really take to this idea and they have collected things over the years for their special shelf. We often talk about the things, where they came from; I have my own collection of items and each has its own story that I have shared with the kids over the years. It seems as though this has resulted in the kids understanding that everyone has things they treasure and we keep those things safe because they mean a lot to us. Not just things but people, animals, plants and trees too!  Leah: If I witness one of my children mistreating a possession, I explain (make that, lecture) on what they were doing that was jeopardizing the integrity of the item. Then I take it away for a time, kind of like a “time-out” from that possession, and explain that he or she will get it back when I am satisfied that he or she has learned the importance of taking care of a belonging. If it becomes destroyed from carelessness then I don’t replace it.   Angela: I try to pretty much give everything a spot to live. Whether it’s on a dresser, on a shelf, in a basket or a bin, or even parked in the corner of the room - when you’re not using it, it needs to get put away. I try to teach them that taking care of their own things is important because you don’t want something to get damaged or go missing or get thrown out by accident (or on purpose) because you left it lying around (especially if you have babies in the house who tend to like to chew, eat, drool, break, smash anything they can).And yes,” if I have warned you to pick it up more than a few times and you don’t, you probably won’t see it again if I end up picking it up!”

Simple Ingredients for a Family History: Dough Art Creations

hat can 2 cups flour, 1 cup salt, 1 cup water, and a little easy play time create? A Christmas Family History! In my family, our treasures began in 1982 with my one year old daughter crunching up some dough in her little hands as my older niece and nephew cut, shaped, carved and painted. And now I have dough art treasures from grandchildren and grandnieces… and there will be more to come from even newer additions to our family. Who knew that 30 years later these little creations would still be favourites on our tree?

The Method to Long Lasting Dough Art:

To Prepare:

Mix 2 cups flour, 1 cup salt and 1 cup water. Knead for a few minutes. Add water, or more flour if needed, to create a dough that easily forms shapes, but not so dry that it cracks while creating.

To Create:

The options are unlimited: Roll out and use cookie cutters or cutting tools, or build freehand for simple ornaments. Dough Art is durable, so if more complex ornaments, like a Santa and reindeer three dimensional scene strikes your fancy, go for it. To add separate pieces, like the bear’s arms, add a touch of water and insert a toothpick or twisted wire to connect the pieces. Toothpicks are ideal for creating designs, as are screwdrivers, playdough tools, and cloves (which can be left in for 25 years from the looks of Courtney’s ornament!) Poke a hole where you want to add a hanger. Dough will expand during baking, so be sure to have at least a pencil size hole. A better option is a ¾ inch loosely twisted wire, with a loop for ribbon, inserted in the top of the ornament before baking.

To Bake:

Bake at 275 degrees for a minimum of one hour for small pieces, and longer for larger pieces (Up to 3 hours or longer is not unusual). If you notice air bubbles forming, poke with a toothpick. Tap on each piece to test when done. It will sound like knocking on hollow wood when ready. This is the key to durability. Under-cooking will leave moisture inside that will eventually soften and/or mould the creation even years later. Overcooking seldom does any harm.

To Decorate:

Leave plain or paint with acrylics or model paints. Water base tempera paints are not recommended. Use a permanent felt pen or paint to add child’s name and year. Finish with an acrylic spray when paints are dry for extra durability. Ta da! Simple, fun, and treasures to last! Enjoy!

What to Get the Child Who Has EVERYTHING! By Vanessa Gammel hat do I get the kid who has everything? As a toy shop owner, I hear this all of the time. It does seem like kids now have a lot more than I remember having and I’m sure grandparents are shocked by the amount that many children have compared to when they were children. But not to worry. There are choices for ‘the kid who has everything’ that will be fun and different from what he or she may already have.   Science Kit: This is a suggestion I make regularly. Most kids have lots of Lego, Barbies etc. but not a lot of creative learning toys. A good science kit will have components in it that are intriguing enough that they will want to try it and have enough components that they can play with it over and over. There are lots of neat science kits that teach about chemistry, ecoscience, electricity, dinosaurs and all sorts of fun things. Often science kits are complicated and geared to children over 8

One year old A.J.

proudly displays

his favourite toys

years but simple science toys are also great for younger children. A magnifying glass or bug catcher can be really great fun for a preschool aged child.  Craft Supplies: For those rainy days, stickers, paints, sparkles and glue can be very handy. Any parent can attest to the struggle to find something fun and different to do when you are stuck inside due to weather. A gift of new and different craft supplies can spice up a child’s selection and rejuvenate a child’s interest in crafts and give mom something new to pull out of the cupboard. Craft kits that teach children a new skill like a cross-stitch kit or make-your-own soap kit are also very fun. You can find kits that have all of the supplies to make creative things like friendship bracelets, tie-die shirts, and you can even find something practical but fun like paint your own pencil case kits. Blocks: Every toddler and preschool aged child should have a good set of wooden blocks - good old-fashioned wooden blocks. Blocks can be played with on their own and combined as a prop with many other toys like dinky cars, toy animals, dolls – you name it. Lots of folks are hesitant to buy blocks as they think it is too basic and boring. If the adults help build a few structures a few times, before you know it the child will be becoming an architect on his own. Blocks are a toy with immense play value with so much intellectual and physical development promoted when playing with them (but that is a whole other article).  Items in a Collection: Other suggestions are items that will build on a collection. If a child has a play kitchen you could consider buying a neat new toy food set. Does the child collect everything about sharks or dinosaurs? Look for a different product to do with sharks or dinosaurs like a puppet, a book or a game. Lots of young kids love trains – if that is true in your case you can pick up an interesting train or accessory piece to enhance their train set.  Games: Of course a great idea that is fun and excellent for social development is a good game. Don’t feel limited to the basics like Monopoly or Sorry. You can branch out and find interesting games that kids won’t already have. A great thing about games is that they often get families playing together and the TV & video games are off for a while, too. Games like Family Charades in a Box, Yam Slam, Qwirkle or The Settlers of Catan are great games for families with school aged children and are something they probably don’t already have.  And, finally, for the school age child a gift card is always an easy choice. With a gift card they get the excitement of going shopping and picking out something special – and it will be exactly what they want.

Birthday Party Directory

Kindergarten Stole My Granddaughter! A Nana’s Perspective By Janet Whitehead

phy

oney Photogra

Photo: Milk & H

ull time kindergarten. As my oldest grandchild begins her public school education, I’m freaking out. It’s not just the inability to spontaneously have an adventure, an outing, a visit, or a camping trip, though, it’s true, that is playing some havoc. Full time kindergarten triggers some concerns I have that begin at this young age and can have an effect throughout life. This is the life coach talking now, not the Nana.Okay, never mind… it’s both. Will this little one who can so easily go into the ‘zone’ when she plays and creates suddenly learn that that is never okay to ‘not be paying attention’… even though that is her form of meditation, of getting ideas, of processing her day? (Albeit, I do get it, parents - there are times when that can be frustrating for you and there are times when she is simply tuning you out. A teacher of a group of 20+ children, however, seldom has the time to acknowledge the difference, even for those very aware of the value of being in the ‘zone.’) Will this little one who currently has the

time in her day to percolate her thoughts until she feels inspired to talk to a parent or trusted adult about life, concerns, the world around her, her genius ideas - or simply cuddle if that’s what she needsnot have that time? Will she in fact learn that ‘percolating thoughts’- the apparent ‘produce nothing’ time absolutely necessary to think creatively and be creative - is almost always defined as procrastination in the adult world? Will she learn that fitting in to a very large group is the only way to function in this world? Will trying to process the dynamics and rules of a very large group of children have her always feeling like she is on display, and concerned about her every action? Even though her school offers a wonderful variety of creative learning, will that constant awareness of the group dynamics and rules keep her from being able to fully engage in her most unique way? Will story time required by some

“Will the skills she is good at, and the things she is passionate about, be given less priority than the things she is not yet good at, and her strong suits fade because they are not acknowledged?” 22

schools, and some even requiring a notebook for parents to fill out, turn this comforting learning and discovery activity into yet another chore for parents, which then takes away the magic by turning ‘let’s have a story’ to ‘we have to have a story?’ I speak from the experience of coaching parents, and some who are teachers, who have come to recognize how much that school requirement can alter an otherwise ideal family activity. (This is an easy fix… if you can’t change the requirement, you can prevent story time from seeming like a chore now that you are aware how easily that shift can happen.) Will the skills she is good at, and the things she is passionate about, be given less priority than the things she is not yet good at, and her strong suits fade because they are not acknowledged? Will she be introduced to skills long before she is ready and thus make her feel incompetent, but if introduced when she shows her readiness she’d learn quickly and efficiently? How soon will it be before overwhelm becomes an underlying theme for her, the same theme that is playing out for older children and adults that drains energy, keeps people from making good choices, snowballs the thinking that they must do more, produce more, be better, be hard on themselves, fit in, and live up to outrageous expectations of systems, organizations, peers, leaders and the media?

Is it perhaps that overwhelm that builds as children go through their school years that plays a role in how mean children can be to each other? If they soon forget their way of processing their life or simply do not have time, is there a possibility that leads to the reactive rather than responsive behaviors of children with each other? This may sound like I am entirely anti the school system. This is not true. I am, however, a life coach who gets to help people wanting to have a happier healthier life re-look at their uniquely individual ways of successfully making choices and taking actions towards that life. The process always comes back to reconnecting to what they knew worked for them in the past.. often right back to those preschool years. The process reveals the beliefs that have limited them and or kept them stuck in a place they don’t really want to be anymore. And, yes, many of those beliefs are formed through school years… not through bad intentions or bad teachings but, simply, they were trying to comprehend a world without keeping the skills to comprehend it in their empowered and unique way that they were naturally drawn to in their preschool years. The process always includes discovering the value of doing less and finding that time and space to really process thoughts in the way that works for them… often combining the wisdom of the adult with the creativeness and playfulness they knew as a child, or simply learning that ‘doing nothing’ is not always procrastinating, but a way to connect to genius ideas. In our over-structured, over-productive society, the opportunity and the techniques to really connect to who we are and what we want is lost. Yes, it is full time kindergarten that has triggered this article. And full time elementary school with homework to boot. And even the full time workforce. One of my long time careers was in Recreation and Leisure Management. I chose that career because back in the 80’s all the statistics said that our work week would go down to 4 days a week, 6-7 hour days. Yes, it was a prediction that computers would ease our lives and allow more leisure time. I chose that career because I watched how unhappy people were in their work, and I delighted in the opportunity to perhaps not only encourage happier leisure and recreation time, but perhaps encourage people to take their passions and turn those into that 4 day work week. It’s not a big surprise that my passion led to me becoming a life coach. But something went badly wrong in that prediction. Somehow it became expected that people work even harder with unrealistic expectations both as employees, or entrepreneurs and as parents. And now we even have kindergarteners going to school full time. Yes, I’m freaking out.

Notes from a Boho Momma By Amanda Barker

appy Autumn Mamma’s and Papa’s!

Well, I have finally accepted that summer is over and have gotten excited for all things fall, like our yearly visit to Davison Orchard’s to pick a pumpkin, boot shopping that I MUST do every October (for myself), and warming foods like stews with root vegetables that you can only properly eat when it’s chilly outside. As of late I have been making a hearty soup and I was calling it ‘Surprise Soup’ because even I did not know what would be in the soup once it was finished! For my kids, this was not a fun game, so now I pretend I have a plan and call it ‘Soup of da Harvest’(in an accent of course) and then maybe 2 out of 4 of my kids will get excited for dinner . My ‘that is so 2011’ soups were made with chicken or beef stock (not much of a surprise!), but now my not-so-secret base is a mixture of Naam Miso Gravy, water and Bragg All Purpose Soy Seasoning (or Braggs for you hippies out there). The infamous Naam Miso Gravy originated from The Naam; a 24 hour, vegetarian restaurant in Vancouver that is known for its great food and bad service (really). I use Naam Miso Gravy on salad, lamb and potatoes, roasted vegetables and rice, and only recently discovered that it also makes soups and stews taste delicious despite bad planning and loads of swiss chard! The point of all my raving is that I have found an almost identical homemade version of the gravy and I am going to share it with you. Now you too will be able to make ‘Soup of da Harvest’ and turn whatever happens to be in your fridge at 5 o’clock into something delicious.

{ }

Janet L. Whitehead is a Professional Life Coach, and joyful facilitator of ‘Muses for Mommies’ – a course for moms to live inspired lives with less guilt and more fun. www.musingsandmud.com

Miso Gravy 4 tablespoons miso paste 2 cups vegetable broth 2 tablespoons olive or grapeseed oil 1 tablespoon sesame oil 2 tablespoons cider vinegar 2 tablespoons honey or maple syrup for a richer flavour 2 teaspoons Sriracha (the hot sauce with the rooster on the front) 4 cloves garlic, minced 1 tablespoon ginger, minced 2 tablespoons cornstarch (organic if possible) 2 tablespoons cold water

Whisk it all together (except the cornstarch and water) in a saucepan and cook over medium heat until lightly boiling, stirring occasionally. Turn it down to a simmer and mix the cornstarch and water together in a separate bowl. Add the cornstarch and water mixture to the gravy and whisk to blend. If you prefer thicker gravy, add some more of the cornstarch and water mixture. Hope you like it as much as we do! Amanda Barker is a herbalist, doula, CBE, and owner of Ovio Organico skin care and Boho Birth. abarker54@gmail.com.

Dear Aunty...

Answering questions about you and your child’s health

ne week into the school year and my sweet little daughter came home, looked right at me, and said the ‘F-word.’ No, not that F-word. The other one. ‘Fat.’ As in, “does this outfit make me look…?”. She’s six. It seems strange to have the body-image ‘talk’ with a six year old, but it’s amazing what they overhear on the ‘big kids’ playground. For example, did you know that in a survey of adolescents in grades 7-12, 30% of girls reported teasing by peers about their weight 1. Further, 37% of girls in grade nine and 40% in grade ten perceived themselves as too fat. Even among students of normal-weight (based on BMI), 19% believed that they were too fat, and 12% of students reported attempting to lose weight 2. Pressure to conform is by no means limited to girls. Recent research has shown that boys experience a huge amount of pressure from their peers to ‘be a man,’ for example, often with terrible consequences to their self-esteem. However, girls and boys seem to experience different kinds of pressure, with girls more often than boys trying to achieve impossible beauty standards that are produced through much media trickery - photo cropping, airbrushing, composite bodies, and body doubles. As my brilliant friend Saleema Noon, Sex Educator extraordinaire, puts it: “Move over, Webkinz and Polly Pockets, it’s time for sexting, YouTube, low tops and high skirts.” And boy oh boy, is she right. Saleema runs programs in the Lower Mainland area called “iGirl” which help 9-12 year old girls cope with the intense pressure to conform. She leads girls through exercises to help them discover: “I am my own BFF. I think my body’s a beauty. I know the facts of life. I get the ‘net. I have healthy relationships. I am the best I can be. I expect respect”3. Wow. Where was that program 30 years ago when I was a kid?! For children, the influence of other people shifts over time. Up to fifth and sixth grade, parents and siblings tend to be the most influential significant others. In seventh and eighth grade, friends tend to be the most influential. By university, friends, teachers and parents tend to equally influence an individual’s

self-concept (Health Canada, 1996). So what can we do to help inoculate our girls against all the YouTube-ing, sexting, and unrealistic images of beauty they’ll be exposed to by the media, their peers, and their online communities before they start to tune us out completely? One important thing we can do is support programs such as iGirl and our terrific Kamloops Power of Being a Girl conference. I asked one of my favourite community heroes -- social worker, teacher and community activist, Tanya Pawliuk, who has again helped to organize this year’s conference --for more information. See below for all the details on how to get your girls involved, on how to volunteer your time, or how to help sponsor an attendee! By the way, don’t forget to tell all your friends on the Coast to check out Saleema Noon’s amazing website for information on her programs or to book her to come to a lower mainland school: www.saleemanoon.com The Kamloops Community YMCA-YWCA is proud to present the 7th annual Power of Being a Girl Conference(PBG). This one-day conference is designed by girls for girls, and provides participants with the opportunity to explore the challenges of growing up in a fun and empowering way. Our conference traditionally offers 5 workshops (3 for the heart/brain and 2 for the heart/body), and girls are invited to choose the two workshops that most interest them. This year’s workshops include a focus on media busting, the art of relationships, exploring girl transitions through drama, Henna, and Zumba. PBG offers an enriching girl-only environment for participants and volunteers. Girls are invited to participate in the warm and inclusive spirit of sisterhood, and the workshops are sensitive to the needs of teenage girls. They are fun, informative, inspirational, and fearless about addressing the issues that most affect girls locally, nationally, and internationally. The Power of Being a Girl conference is FREE and is taking place at the Kamloops Tournament Capitol Centre on Wednesday, October 17. Sign up soon. Spaces go quickly! There are many opportunities for members of our community to provide support for the Power of Being a Girl Conference, including sponsoring a girl, partnering with the Kamloops YMCAYWCA, or volunteering during the event. If you are interested in any of these opportunities, please contact us at pbg@kamloopsy. org or call Jacquie at 250-374-6162. 1. Eisenberg, M. E. & Neumark-Sztainer, D. (2003). Associations of Weight-Based Teasing and Emotional Well-Being Among Adolescents. Archives of Pediatrics & Adolescent Medicine, 157(6), 733-738. 2. Boyce, W. F., King, M. A. & Roche, J. (2008). Healthy Living and Healthy Weight. In Healthy Settings for Young People in Canada 3. http://www.saleemanoon.com/igirl/ “Aunty” Erin Mitchell is a proud nurse, momma, and owner of Aunty’s House Registered Family Daycare. She is currently working on a degree in child and adolescent psychology through TRU.

Do you have a question for ‘Aunty’ Erin? Contact her at cdnnurse1995@yahoo.ca. 24

Let Me Introduce Myself...

The life of a ‘childless momma’ By April Wainwright

i Kamloops Mommas ...and Dads, too! First, let me just say what an honour and privilege it is for me to write for this wonderful magazine. I have enjoyed reading the wonderfully written parent and child related articles since the magazine began. When I saw that Kamloops Momma was looking for someone to write for a “unique parenting perspective” column, I jumped (meaning I emailed) at the chance to share my unique perspective on parenting. Now, one thing that you may (or may not) notice, which is pretty huge, is that I don’t have kids! You may be thinking “What in the world is a woman doing writing in a momma magazine who has no kids?” and that is totally okay to think that. You see, I thought my “Childless Momma” views would be a very interesting regular column idea. And here I am! My name is April and I am a “Childless Momma,” which basically means that I don’t have the children that I have yearned for since I was about 5 years old. I got married a bit “late..31, to be exact. We tried to have kids for a couple years, then I got very sick. The doctors were cautiously optimistic about my having a baby but, sadly, we have found out since that it will be impossible to have kids. It doesn’t look like adoption is an option, at least for now, neither does foster-parenting. So, it looks that children will not be in our future. To say this is sad is totally an understatement. In the world of Facebook, Pinterest, and other social media, parenting tips, baby bumps, and congratulations for the new parents abound. To be blunt, it hurts. It’s sometimes hard to be happy for those who are experiencing this wonderful addition to their lives. There have been countless times that I have wondered “why not me?”, “what’s wrong with me?”, and “does this mean that I would make a terrible mom?” However, I have learned in the last few months that having kids (just like being married, and other major life events) isn’t better or worse, it’s just different. There are a lot of days that I do quite enjoy my childless life: A full night’s rest, watching TV whenever I want (no fighting over the TV with a 2 yr old who wants to watch Dora, AGAIN!), I only need to worry about buying things for my husband and me, I can sit for HOURS at a coffee shop and read, enjoy grocery shopping alone...the list goes on.  I am not totally without children in my life, however. I have a 17 month old nephew (who’s actually been in the magazine himself), and a 3 month old niece. I also have an 8 yr old niece who lives on the Island. I get to love on my nephew quite a lot (they live fairly close), and I am falling in love with my “little dolly” since meeting her this past summer. Thankfully, I get to “see” her via Facebook, through pictures, etc. I am the oldest of 7 kids, and the 4 “younger” ones were born when I was in my teens/early 20’s, so I have helped take care of them, which I thoroughly enjoyed. I have also enjoyed my friends’ children over the years, and as most recent as this summer, got to enjoy my cousins’ children at our family reunion. I was in baby heaven! I am going to school this year to be a School and Community Support Worker, which will hopefully allow me to work with children in different aspects. I have thought of doing other child-related careers, but I figured that this is the best fit for me at the present time. I am looking forward to working with children in some capacity.  I hope you will enjoy reading my unique and interesting perspective, as much as I know I will enjoy writing it. Are YOU a “Childless Momma”? Please feel free to contact me! aa_wainwright74@hotmail.com

April doesn’t have children of her own, but she adores her niece and nephew, affectionately called Rosebud and Bebop. Photo by Luke Moilliet

Bringing Kamloops’ Sexy Back... One Momma at a Time: Nicola Minion

e asked what your dream photo shoot would be. Here’s what our winner, Nicola, had to say: “I’ve never done a photography shoot before and am turning 40 this year. I’m a full-time working mom of 3 kids and in my ‘spare’ time am a chauffeur, chef, gardener, sports coach, tutor...you get the idea. My kids are 15 (girl), 8 (boy) and 6 (girl). Since my oldest daughter was born, we’ve been told how much we look alike, often that we look more like sisters than mother/ daughter. Because the kids are spread so far apart in ages, my oldest often feels left out because of the demands of the 2 younger. My dream photo shoot would be with my oldest daughter. It would be a treat to myself as I’m turning 40 - to feel beautiful and empowered - but also to share the experience and have the tangible memory with my daughter. As she moves farther into her young adult years, it can sometimes be challenging to feel connected. This would be something we could remember and cherish forever. And, the day will come soon enough that I don’t look like her sister - some proof for those sad days will be pretty cool!”

Nicola and her daughter, Carmen, had an amazing balletinspired shoot. Nicola exclaimed, â&#x20AC;&#x153;My girl is as beautiful inside as she is out and Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m so blessed to have been able to share the experience with her. Best of all, we giggled together!

Thanks so much to our fantastic sponsors: *Kathleen Ferguson Photography (photos) www.kathleenfergusonphotography.ca

250.574.2225

*Evie Beauty (make-up)

www.eviebeauty.com

250.819.0234

*Ailsa Ainscow, Ra Hair Studio (hair) www.rahairstudio.com

250.372.8746

Community Resource Directory Birthday Parties & Events See p. 21 for our Birthday Party Directory

Childcare and Preschool

Papa’s Candy Shop

The sweetest little place...in Sahali Center Mall. Old fashioned candy, custom candy buffets, gift wrapping, and full service candy shop Sahali Mall 259.377.0986 papascandyshop@telus.net

Kamloops Child Development Society Safe and inclusive child care and Sweet Home Cafe

early learning programs www.cdckamloops.com 250.376.2233

River City Gymnastics

Cafe with a staffed kids play area 1380 Hillside Dr 778.471.5579 www.sweethomecafeforyou.com

Gymnastics and mutli-sport facility Health & Wellness 778.471.5767 www.rivercitygymnastics.ca

Children’s Retail Lizzie Bits Baby Co.

Cloth diapers, unique children’s items, high quality children’s consignment 205-450 Lansdowne 250.374.8706 www.lizziebaby.ca

Mulberry Bush

Gently Loved Consignment & New Items 1304 Battle St. 250.374.2501 www3.telus.net/mulberrybush

Peekaboo Beans

Playwear for kids on the grow! Christina Fitzmaurice 250.320.2337 christinaf.stylist@peekaboobeans.com

The Enchanted Teacup

Princess/fairy/character hostess, Dressup theme parties, fun retail, tea retail 410 Tranquille Road 250.376.8327 www.enchantedteacup.com

Tumbleweed Toys

Safe, Sustainable & Inspired toys, games, puzzles and more. Sahali Mall 250.372.3500 www.TumbleweedToys.ca

Family Resources

Fit By Design

Family Friendly Fitness 250.819.0822 www.kamloopsfitbydesign.com

Let’s Move Studio

Yoga - Dance - Wellness letsmove@gmail.com 250.372.9642 www.letsmovestudio.com

Musings and Mud Coaching Studio

Workshops, workbooks, personal coaching with a creative twist. Janet L. Whitehead, certified professional coach janet@musingsandmud.com 250.376.8402 www.musingsandmud.com

Smooth Effects Laser Hair Removal The leader in laser hair removal #8-1390 Hillside Dr. 250.372.2261 www.smootheffects.ca

Child Care Subsidy Program

Vintage-inspired handmade treasure... with a modern twist. 250.819.8478 beneaththemonkeytree@gmail.com

Interior Community Services 250.554.3134

Ministry of Children & Family Services 250.371.3600 Parent Helpline 1.888.603.9100

Food and Beverage Fudge Yeah The Fudge Store With More! 442 Victoria St 778.471.5505 www.fudgeyeah.ca

Nature’s Fare Markets

Organic and Natural Foods Grocer 5-1350 Summit Drive 250.314.9560 www.naturesfare.com

McSew

Jane McMillan, Seamstress & Knitter. Specializing in sleepsacks, infant accessories, knitted/felted accessories and alterations. Tel: 250.828.2309 Mobile: 250.319.8808 McKnit@hotmail.com

Mila by Lifemax

Omega-3 superfood, gluten-free, high in fiber, protein and antioxidants Val Butterfield, Independent Distributor 250.554.8203 milaval77@gmail.com

Moms Helping Moms – work from home

Perfect opportunity for moms and others www.lookaround.ca choiceofwellness@gmail.com

Home Decor Iron Orchid Design

Unique new, used, and repurposed decor 408 Seymour St. 778.471.6696 www.ironorchiddesign.com

Music Kamloops Symphony Music School

Group classes and private instruction for all ages and levels. 250.372.5000 Yoga for You.Yoga for Your Family.Your Yoga Station Plaza #3-510 Lorne St. Community. 201- 409 Seymour Street Medical Services 250.828.6206 250.319.8583 BC Nurse Line 1.866.215.4700 info@youryogaloft.com Royal Inland Hospital 250.374.5111 www.youryogaloft.com

Home-based Sales and Services

Assistance with day care costs 1.888.338.6622

Fashion jewellery, special occasion accessories, sleepwear and loungewear 250.574.4233 inkedroxstarr@shaw.ca www.mylatasia.ca/rox-annhaines

Yoga Loft

Big Brothers Big Sisters

821 Seymour St 250.374.6134

Latasia, Rox-ann Haines

Beneath the Monkey Tree

Bunches ‘n Bundles

Custom gift packages for all occasions featuring items from small local companies 250.318.5368 bunchesandbundles@gmail.com

Creative Memories

Denise Swoboda, Unit Leader Photo-safe scrapbook albums and more! 250.578.8589 deniseswoboda@telus.net www.mycmsite.com/denises

Discovery Toys, Alison Gregory Discovery Toys Team Leader 250.851.2270 aligregory@telus.net discoverytoy.com/aligregory

Walk-in Clinics: Northshore Treatment Centre

700 Tranquille Rd 250.554.4265

Summit Medical Clinic

5 - 1380 Summit Drive 250.374.9800

Kamloops Urgent Care Clinic

#4 - 910 Columbia Street 250-371-4905

Online Resources Access Kamloops

A regularly updated directory connecting people with a variety of not-for-profit resources. www.accesskamloops.org

KamloopsParents.com

The online resource to all things familyfriendly in Kamloops. www.kamloopsparents.com elizabeth@kamloopsparents.com

MakeChildrenFirst.ca

Map of Family & Breastfeeding-friendly businesses in Kamloops 250.554.3134 www.makechildrenfirst.ca

Community Resource Directory Parent-Child Groups Attachment Parenting

2/month - days and locations vary 250-376-4723

Family Tree Drop-in

Mon and Wed 9-4 283 West Victoria St. 250.377.6890

Healthy Beginnings

Tues 9:45-11:45 / Thurs 10:30-12:30 Interior Indian Friendship Society 2355 Parkcrest Ave. 250.554.3134

Kamloops Connexions

Fri 9:30-11:30, 700 Hugh Allen Drive S.W. Community Church 250.828.1114 coffee-connexions@hotmail.com

Kamloops Wiggles and Giggles Adoption Playgroup

Monthly, Deanna, jones_A@telus.net

Next Steps

Fri, 1-2:20, Kamloops Public Health Unit 519 Columbia St. 250.851.7300

StrongStart Programs (during school year)

Bumblebees

Mon, Tues, Thurs, Fri, 8:30-11:30 Wed, 12-2:30 Arthur Hatton Elem. 315 Chestnut Ave., 250.376.7217

Dragon Flies

Mon-Fri, 8:30-11:30 Marion Schilling Elem., 2200 Park Dr. 250.376.2027

Eagles’ Nest

Mon-Fri, 8:45-11:15 South Sahali Elem., 1585 Summit Dr. 250.374.2451

YMCA Child Interactive Centre Mon-Fri 9-12 Southwest Y/CCRR Unit E, 1420 Hugh Allan Dr 250-372-7791

Prenatal and Postpartum Care Birth Matters - Jodi Anderson

Doula and Childbirth Educator birthmatters.doula.prenatal@gmail.com 250.372.3733 250.819.2099

Boho Birth

Doula services & prenatal education Amanda Barker 250.376.8331 bohobirth@gmail.com

Breastfeeding Centre

Drop in breastfeeding info and help Kamloops Health Unit 519 Columbia St 250.851.7300 Mon 1- 4, Thurs 9 - 12

Mighty Oak Midwifery Personal,

professional, woman-centered maternity care. 250.377.8611

www.mightyoakmidwifery.ca

Tiny Blessings Prenatal

Prenatal education focusing on late pregnancy, labor & delivery, breastfeeding, & newborn care. 250-819-0510 www.tinyblessingsprenatal.com

Welcome to the Babyhood

Your resource for child passenger safety and cloth diaper education. Jennifer Harbaruk 250.572.1717 www.welcometothebabyhood.com

Photography Captured Memories Photography

Children • Engagement • Family • Graduation • Maternity • Newborns • Weddings www.captured-memories.ca hrsayers@gmail.com 250.320.6558

Life Unfolding Photography

Photography for all your little wild things Moms with Camera’s facilitator www.lifeunfolding.ca

Kathleen Ferguson Photography

Specialising in gorgeous, modern, contemporary photos, with a vintage twist. 250.574.2225 kate_ferguson@hotmail.com www.kathleenfergusonphotography.ca

Milk & Honey Photography

Lisa DiGeso milkandhoney@mail.com www.milkandhoneyphotography.ca

Sunbeams and Freckles Photography Capturing those intimate, everyday moments that often go undocumented 778.471.2828 Pegsy75@gmail.com

Real Estate and Investments Chelsea Mann, Realtor

Century 21 - Desert Hills Realty 250.571.6666 chelsea@chelseamann.ca www.kamloopshomes.net

Karen Lanoue

Canadian Scholarship Trust Boost your post-secondary education savings by $7200 karen.lanoue@cstresp.com 250.573.2299

Ken Featherstone, Realtor

Royal LePage Westwin Realty Personal Real Estate Corp. 250.374.1461 kenfeathetone@royallepage.ca

Women’s Clothing The Ruby Room

New & Recycled Fashion 265 Victoria Street 250.828.7829

Community Events Calendar

presented by:

Visit www.KamloopsParents.com for a complete, up-to-date calendar of family-friendly events! October 1 (Cont): Kamloops October 6 (Cont): Kamloops Library Tiny Tunes Mondays and Region Farmer’s Market 200 Block St. Paul St., Saturdays 10:15-10:45am (free) 8am – 12pm Oct 2/ Nov 6: Mom’s Morn-

10:15-10:45am (free) October 12: Kamloops Royal Ball Colombo Lodge Kamloops 5:00-8:30pm

October 7: 3rd Annual Oct 13/Nov 10: Home Depot Enduro Bike Race Harper Kids Workshop 10am, ages Mountain ($35/adult, $5 child) 4-12 250.371.4300 (free) Oct 2/ Nov 6: Mom’s Morning Out Mighty Oak Midwife- October 8: Teddy Bear Picnic October 13: Kamloops and Farmer’s Market BC ry, 11am – 1pm (free) Library Lego Club 2:003:00pm (free) October 3 (Cont): Kamloops Wildlife Park 9:30 – 4pm (admission) and Region Farmer’s October 13-14: Fall Highland Market 400 Block Victoria St., October 9 (Cont): Kamloops Dance Competition TCC Library Tiny Tunes By the Wednesdays 8am – 2pm Fieldhouse Light of the Moon Tuesdays October 5-6: Fall Festival October 13 (Cont): North 6:30-7:00pm (free) at Sahali Mall all day. Treats, Kamloops Library Good October 10 (Cont): Kamloops Afternoon Saturday contests, charities and more! Library Tiny Tunes Storytime 1:00-1:30pm (free) Oct 4 (Cont): ShambWednesdays 10:15-10:45am hala Meditation Thurs October 13-28: Kamloops (free) 7:00pm, 433b Lansdowne Heritage Railway’s Ghost October 10 (Cont): North St. kamloopsshambhala.org Train Kamloops Heritage Kamloops Library Rock-a250.376.4224 Railway 7:00-8:10pm ($12-20) Bye-Baby Wednesdays 10:15October 5(Cont): North Oct 15: Int’l Pregnancy and 10:45am (free) Kamloops Library Family Infant Loss Remembrance October 10 (Cont): Kamloops Day info@pregnancycarekamStory Time Fridays 10:15Library Story Dog Program loops.com 10:45am (free) Wednesdays 3:00-4:00pm Oct 6 (Cont): Family FavouOct 15/ Nov 19: Kamloops rites at the Cineplex Odeon (free) Infant and Pregnancy Loss Cineplex Aberdeen, Saturdays October 10: Babywearing 101 Support Group 205-535 Lizzie Bits Baby Co 6- 7pm 11am, ($2.50) Tranquille Rd, 7 – 8:30pm Oct 6 (Cont): Chapters Craft 250.374.8706 250.376.4646 and Storytime Saturdays 11- October 11(Cont): North Oct 19-21 Kamloops Fall Kamloops Library After 12pm 250.377.8468 (free) Home Show Interior Savings October 6: Mini Comic Con School Club Thursdays 3:00- Centre 4:00pm (free) and Art Contest Kamloops October 20: Small Business October 12 (Cont): Kamloops Library 2:00-4:00pm Saturday FInd out more at Library Story Time Fridays www.shopsmallbiz.ca ing Out Mighty Oak Midwifery, 11am – 1pm (free)

October 20: KamloopsParents.com Family Market Calvary Community Church 9:001:00pm ($2)

Have an e vent? Tell us abo ut it and w e’ll put it in our Co mmunity E vents Calendar for FREE! info@kamlo opsmomm a.com Find us on Facebook ! Oct 26: Spooky Halloween Swim Canada Games Aquatic Centre, 6-8pm, 250.828.3655 October 27: Western Canada Theatre Halloween Party Pavilion Theatre 10:00am – 12:00pm (Food Bank donation) October 28: Halloween Skate Memorial Arena 11am – 1pm October 28: Cloth Diapering 101 Lizzie Bits Baby Co 1- 2pm 250.374.8706 November 4: Where the Wild Things Are Pavillion Theatre 11:00am and 2:00pm showings Nov 4: RIH Craft-A- Fair 104pm, Interior Savings Centre Nov 10: Neighbourhood Toy Store Day @ Tumbleweed Toys, Sahali Mall November 12: Max and Ruby in Nutcracker Suite Sagebrush Theatre 6:30pm 250.374.LIVE Nov 16-17: Christmas at the Square Art & Craft Show St. Andrews on the Square, 250.377.4232 November 18: Mo-Vember Skate McArthur Park OLY Arena 11:15 – 1pm November 22: Lights in the Night Christmas Party Downtown Kamloops 4:008:00pm Nov 23: B100 Basics for Babies raising funds for Kamloops Food Bank, 7am -10am, Hotel 540.

November 24: Santa Claus Parade Downtown Kamloops October 20/21: Boo at the Zoo 11:00am 250.372.3242 BC Wildlife Park 5:00-9:00pm Nov 25: SPCA Craft Fair 10Oct 21: The River CKRV 4pm, Kamloops Convention Haunted House A “friendly” Centre, 1250 Rogers Way haunted house, behind Value November 29: WCT’s A Village (free) Christmas Story Sagebrush October 21/26-28: Boo at the Theatre 8:00pm 250.372.3216 Zoo BC Wildlife Park 5:009:00pm