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1134 Georgia St. Harriman, TN 37748

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RoaneReader FREE

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December 2016

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VOLUME 24

NUMBER 2

7,500

Little River - A Serial ............... 28 By Rachel Holbrook

Precious Memories ................. 2 By Kay Christopher

Penny Pinchers ......................... 13 Money saving hints and tips

Bible Beat .............................. 8 & 9 Quizzes, puzzles, facts

Seen and Heard .......................... 2 By our readers

Entertainment ............................ 4 Trivia, facts, movie mistakes

Writer's Page ............................ 18 Our readers submitted writings

Aunt Hattie ............................... 12 Hurry-up recipes

According to the Almanac ......... 5 When to do what

Never Loose Money .................. 14 By Bob Tonachio

Obituaries ................................... 7 Monthly

Fun & Facts for Kids only ....... 26 And Adults

Business Directory .................... 31 Contact info for local businesses

Can You Find MeÂż ................... 22

FIND THE CLOSEST ROANE READER pg.31 and @

www.roanereader.com/findone Pick one up before they are all gone!

By The Phantom

Pets Page ................................... 23 Tips for your pets


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2 The Roane Reader

SEEN & HEARD IN ROANE COUNTY

www.roanereader.com

Sensible New Years Resolutions

I will stop considering other people's feelings when they so obviousBy O.I. Seenya ly don't consider mine - if that unwashed fellow sits next to me again, • A fox spotted on Queen St. in I'll tell him he stinks! Harriman. I will not bore my boss by with the same excuse for taking leaves. I • A lady pulling around to the will think of some more excuses. drive-thru at a local fast food I will do less laundry and use more deodorant. restaurant, pulling up to a trash can, thinking she was at Assure my lawyer that I will never again show up drunk at a custody hearing. the speaker. • A young child, looking at I will try to figure out why I *really* need nine e-mail addresses. his baby brother, telling him I resolve to work with neglected children -- my own. that God must have dropped I will spend less than one hour a day on the Internet. This, of course, him from Heaven. will be hard to estimate since I'm not a clock watcher. • A lady, standing in an eleva- I will not hang around girls - they think you love them and that tor, complaining because it stinks. was so slow, then realizing she I will answer my snail mail with the same enthusiasm with which I had not hit the floor number answer my e-mail. button. When I hear a funny joke I will not reply, "LOL... LOL!"

Happy Birthday

I will find out why the correspondence course on "Mail Fraud" that I purchased never showed up.

Justin Christopher

Start buying lottery tickets at a luckier store. Always replace the gas nozzle before driving away from the pump.

Dec. 27th

I will keep an extra safe distance when driving behind police cars.

9:00am to 4:30pm Mon - Fri The income tax brackets for 2016 are only slightly wider than for 2015 because of mild inflation during the 12-month period from Sept. 2014 through Aug. 2015 that's used to figure the adjustments. Tax rates do not change. PERSONAL TAXES

Marrieds: lf taxable income is

The tax is

Singles: If taxable income is

The tax is

Not more than $18,550 Over $18,550 but not more than $75,300 Over $75,300 but not more than $151,900 Over $151,900 but not more than $231,450 Over $231,450 but not more than $413,350 Over $413,350 but not more than $466,950 Over $466,950 Not more than $9,275 Over $9,275 but not more than $37,650 Over $37,650 but not more than $91,150 Over $91,150 but not more than $190,150 Over $190,150 but not more than $413,350 Over $413,350 but not more than $415,050 Over $415,050

Household Heads: If taxable income is Not more than $13,250 Over $13,250 but not more than $50,400 Over $50,400 but not more than $130,150 Over $130,150 but not more than $210,800 Over $210,800 but not more than $413,350 Over $413,350 but not more than $441,000 Over $441,000

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Precious Memories By: Kay Christopher

The Best Gift I Ever Gave

My sister, Sandra Stout and I were best friends. I didn’t realize this until we were grown, but we were always together growing up and I was like her shadow. One special memory I have is playing paper dolls with her. We had saved up our money and bought some Lennon Sisters paper dolls. We played for hundreds of hours with them, so much, in fact, they were bent, and faded out so bad you could hardly stand them up. After we were grown and had kids of our own, and after Ebay was discovered, I found two new, complete sets of the Lennon Sisters paper dolls on line! I ordered both sets. When they arrived I opened them and a lifetime of memories came flooding back. I remembered all those happy hours with Sandra. I wrapped the paper dolls up to give them to her for Christmas. I remember thinking this was a silly gift for a grown woman, and later told her I had her a gift for Christmas and added that she would probably throw it at me after she opened it. She said the present I got her was the best present she had ever gotten. We both cried over the phone at how happy I was to have given them to her, and how happy she was to receive them. Such a simple gift, but the memories of playing with those paper dolls and imagining we were them was unforgettable.

Happy Birthday

Darrell Fink Dec. 5th

The first penny candy to be wrapped in America was the Tootsie Roll in 1896

10% of taxable income $1,855.00 + 15% of excess over $18,550 $10,361.50 + 25% of excess over $75,300 $29,517.50 + 28% of excess over $151,900 $51,791.50 + 33% of excess over $231,450 $111,818.50 + 35% of excess over $413,350 $130,578.50 + 39.6% of excess over $466,950

10% of taxable income $1,325.00 + 15% of excess over $13,250 $6,897.50 + 25% of excess over $50,400 $26,835.00 + 28% of excess over $130,150 $49,417.00 + 33% of excess over $210.800 $116,258.50 + 35% of excess over $413,350 $125,936.00 + 39.6% of excess over $441,000

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10% of taxable income $927.50 + 15% of excess over $9,275 $5,183.75 + 25% of excess over $37,650 $18,558.75 + 28% of excess over $91,150 $46,278.75 + 33% of excess over $190,150 $119,934.75 + 35% of excess over $413,350 $120,529.75 + 39.6% of excess over $415,050

The tax is

December 2016

www.msw-law.com

The Roane Reader is a monthly publication and a privately owned partnership. Our address is 1134 Georgia St. Harriman, TN 37748. We welcome letters to the editor. The letters should be signed with address and phone number (for verification only.) We reserve the right to edit for grammar and clarity.


December 2016

Phone: 865-882-9340

Why do we have daylight saving time? When Daylight Saving ends it means we gain back an hour of sleep but lose an hour of daylight, but have you ever wondered why we have daylight saving time? Daylight Saving started during World War I to help save energy. The assumption was – the more daylight from the extra hour in the evening, the less electricity and resources used…but whether it saves energy or not remains uncertain. This is because the extra hour in the evening – starting the second Sunday of March – may lead to more air conditioning or heating in the evening and more electricity in the darker mornings. Another effect of Daylight Saving argued is the potential increase in gas because of the extra hour, but conclusions for both remain mixed. A 2008 study by the Department of Energy found that Daylight Saving helped save energy. The national average of electricity saved during Daylight Saving time was 0.5 percent per day. The report also found that “Changes in national traffic volume and motor gasoline consumption for passenger vehicles in 2007 could not be attributed to EDST (daylight saving).” But another study by Matthew Kotchen and Laura Grant found the exact opposite in Indiana. Previously some of Indiana did not observe daylight saving, but it 2006 that all changed. The study found a one percent increase in residential electricity from Daylight Saving. ‘That increase estimates a $9 million per year increase in electricity bills for Indiana households,’ according to the study. The report also estimates “social costs of increased pollution emissions between $1.7 to $5.5 million per year.” Joeal Tucker is the owner of the Tick Tock Shop in Columbus. He repairs watches and clocks and would prefer if Columbus did not participate in Daylight Saving. “Well it’d keep from having to turn the clocks up or down or whatever and get used to sleeping right, but I would like it to stay one way.” Tucker typically does not change the clocks in his shop, but says people trying to change the clocks time from daylight saving can be problematic. He says when some people try to adjust the time on the clock, they can some time cause major damage by trying to move the hour hand back. The solution: “Always turn the hand forward never backwards because if you do, it’ll mess up the head on it. But if you have a pendulum clock, just stop the pendulum and let it catch up with the time and then start the pendulum back up and it’ll be right.” Each U.S. state and territory has the right to choose to participate or ignore daylight saving. This is why most of Arizona, Hawaii, Puerto Rico and the Virgin Islands don’t have to worry about falling back or springing forward and also why they don’t have to worry about adjusting their clocks.

THIS COUNTRY IS FULL OF PEOPLE WHO WILL STAND IN LINE ALL NIGHT FOR A GIFT, BUT WON’T STAND FOR THE PLEDGE OF ALLEGIANCE.

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Most Popular Baby Names in 2016 Girls

1. OLIVIA 2. AMELIA 3. CHARLOTTE 4. AVA 5. ISLA 6. ARABELLA 7. AURORA 8. ADELINE 9. ISABELLA 10. MIA

Boys 1. EZRA 2. ASHER 3. ATTICUS 4. DECLAN 5. OLIVER 6. MILO 7. SILAS 8. LEVI 9. WYATT 10. HENRY

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Christmastime Facts Christmas trees are evergreen trees, usually either a fir tree, pine tree or spruce tree. It is believed that decorating Christmas trees originated in 16th century Germany when Christians would bring decorated trees into their homes. Some people say the Christmas season officially begins when Santa arrives at the end of the Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade. Did you ever wonder where X-Mas came from? X means Christ in Greek so to shorten the word Christmas we sometimes use X-Mas. In 1836 Alabama became the first state in the US to declare Christmas a legal holiday. Oklahoma became the last state to declare Christmas a legal holiday in 1907. In June of 1870 Christmas became a federal holiday in the US. Christmas trees were first decorated with foods such as apples, nuts and dates. In the 18th century Christmas trees began being decorated with candles. Electric Christmas tree lights were first used in 1895. Did you know that giving presents were once banned by the Catholic Church. It was believed that gift giving was connected to paganism. If you received all the gifts from the song “The Twelve Days of Christmas” you would have 364 presents.

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Mistletoe is especially interesting botanically because it is a partial parasite (a "hemiparasite"). As a parasitic plant, it grows on the branches or trunk of a tree and actually sends out roots that penetrate into the tree and take up nutrients. But mistletoe is also capable for growing on its own; like other plants it can produce its own food by photosynthesis. Mistletoe, however, is more commonly found growing as a parasitic plant. There are two types of mistletoe. The mistletoe that is commonly used as a Christmas decoration (Phoradendron flavescens) is native to North America and grows as a parasite on trees in the west as also in those growing in a line down the east from New Jersey to Florida. The other type of mistletoe, Viscum album, is of European origin. The European mistletoe is a green shrub with small, yellow flowers and white, sticky berries which are considered poisonous. It’s commonly seen on apple but only rarely on oak trees. The rarer oak mistletoe was greatly venerated by the ancient Celts and Germans and used as a ceremonial plant by early Europeans. The Greeks and earlier peoples thought that it had mystical powers and down through the centuries it became associated with many folklore customs.

Kissing under the mistletoe Kissing under the mistletoe is first found associated with the Greek festival of Saturnalia and later with primitive marriage rites. They probably originated from two beliefs. One belief was that it has power to bestow fertility. It was also believed that the dung from which the mistletoe would also possess "life-giving" power. In Scandinavia, mistletoe was considered a plant of peace, under which enemies could declare a truce or warring spouses kiss and make-up. Later, the eighteenth-century English credited with a certain magical appeal called a kissing ball.

Addicts/Alcoholics

are NOT bad people or losers who deserve whatever happens to them. They are SICK people who need help and actually have families that love them. If you can’t help them at least don’t hurt them. Instead of judging them PRAY FOR THEM.

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December 2016

Celebrities Who Left Hollywood For God

When God called, they listened. These born-again celebrities walked away from mainstream Hollywood to focus on their faith in God. As their faith grew stronger, so did their desire to change their music, their acting choices, their reputations and the way they carried themselves in their personal lives. Here are seven celebrities who left Hollywood for God. Chris Tucker The popular actor and comedian was on a role in the mid ‘90s through the early 2000s, starring in the popular Friday and Rush Hour franchises. However, after doing the film Money Talks, he became a born-again Christian in an effort to grow closer in his relationship with God, and made the choice to stop appearing in such vulgar roles. In recent years, he has let go of foul, language with his stand up tours being free of profanity. He even declared he wouldn’t sign on for any Friday sequels as Smokey because he had become born again. Though he didn’t disappear from the world of acting completely, appearing more recently in the Academy-Award nominated film Silver Linings Playbook, he is seen very little compared to what we saw at the height of his acting career. Kirk Cameron After years of being an atheist, the Grown Pains actor was born-again at age 17. After this transformation during his run on the popular sitcom, he asked for lines to be removed from his script for his TV character that weren’t in line with his faith. Once the show ended, he let go of mainstream Hollywood and fell in love with evangelism. He has received some backlash for comments he made on the Piers Morgan Show around the topic of homosexuality, but he has never retracted those statements. Angus T. Jones Recognized by most as the little boy from Two and a Half Men, the child star grew distant from the show once his faith began to transform. In a YouTube clip in 2012, he called the show “filth” and abandoned the show to work with the World Harvest Outreach Church in Houston. He said later in an interview that while working on the show, he felt like a paid hypocrite and it was difficult to be be part of something that was making light of topics in the world that were problems for many people. Today, he wants to continue to come into light because he knows that’s where the healing is. Montell Jordan The singer, popularly known for the ‘90s anthem “This Is How We Do It” put his music career on pause and began trying to reconnect with his faith with his family after the Lord spoke to him and said he needed to lay that life down. They became members of Victory World Church in Atlanta and he was transformed by his experience. Since joining the church, he became a Worship Minister and released the gospel album "Shake Heaven". Vanity Vanity, Prince’s female protégé, was the lead singer of Vanity 6, popularly known for their hit “Nasty Girl” and racy performances. She also appeared in a number of movies including The Last Dragon and Never Too Young To Die opposite John Stamos. But after years of crack cocaine addiction in the late ‘80s, and almost dying from its effects, she found God and was born-again. She said in an interview, “With the devil breathing down my neck, trying desperately to snatch and strangle me for hell, I repented.” She is an evangelist today, and goes by her real name, Denise Matthews. Michelle Williams While the Destiny’s Child singer didn’t abandon the music industry entirely, Gospel is now her focus, moving back to her church roots. She said in an interview that while some people will do Gospel when their career fails, she chose to do it at the height of the popularity of Destiny’s Child. “ I didn’t want to do it because it was a fad. I wanted to do it because it’s in me. It’s in my heart,” she said.

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The Judge said to the defendant, "I thought I told you I never wanted to see you in here again." "Your Honor," the criminal said, "that's what I tried to tell the police, but they wouldn't listen."


December 2016

Phone: 865-882-9340

according to the almanac December 2016 Temperature 56 (8 above avg.) Precipitation 5" (avg.) Dec 1-9: A few showers, warm; Dec 10-12: Rainy, cool; Dec 13-19: Sunny, warm; Dec 20-26: Showers, mild; Dec 27-31: Rain, then, sunny, cold.

Best Days To.... Wean animals or children.........................15,19,24 Start projects............................................................30 Slaughter Livestock....................................23,24,25 Set posts or pour concrete.........1, 2, 3, 28, 29, 30 Quit smoking...............................................15,19,.24 Prune to encourage growth ...................16,17,18 Prune to discourage growth....................19,20 Potty train children....................................15,19,24 Plant below ground crops..................23,24,25 Plant above ground crops...............................9,10 Have Dental care.........................................19,20 Harvest below ground crops...................19,20 Harvest above ground crops........................10,11 Destroy pests and weeds.........................8,9 Cut Hay...................................................................8,9 Cut hair to encourage growth ..................6,7 Cut hair to discourage growth................21,22 Castrate animals.........................................4,5,31 Can, pickle, or make sauerkraut..15,23,24,25 Breed animals..............................................23,24,25 Begin diet to lose weight.........................15,19,24 Begin diet to gain weight...............................7,11

December Birthstone Turquoise

Cultures around the world have admired the distinct color of turquoise since ancient times. The earliest evidence comes from ancient Egyptian tombs, which contain elaborate turquoise jewelry dating back to 3000 BC. Egyptians set turquoise in gold necklaces and rings, used it as inlay and carved it into scarabs. Most notably, King Tut’s iconic burial mask was extravagantly adorned with turquoise.

“Those who are capable of tyranny are capable of perjury to sustain it.” ― Lysander Spooner

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5 The Roane Reader

Girls Just Want to Have Fun! Star or Angel Atop Your Christmas Tree? Many women are finding out just how much fun shooting handguns The two most common Christmas Tree Toppers are the star and the angel. To the Christian faith, the star symbolizes the Star of Bethlehem and the angel symbolizes the host of angels in the Nativity story. The Star of Bethlehem, also called the Christmas Star, is the star that led the wise men, or magi, to Bethlehem and revealed the birth of Jesus. The magi followed the star, which stopped above the location where Jesus was born. The angel symbolizes the host of angels, angel of the Lord, or heavenly host from the Nativity.

Happy Birthday

Arnis Ames

can be. But they are intimidated when they walk into gun ranges because of the way the smell, look, and are treated. This is no longer "a mans world" when it comes to handguns! Family Fun Indoor Range and Shooting for Women Alliance understand this all to well. Under their direction Women of a Different Caliber will be hosting Girls just want to have fun. This is being held the second and fourth Tuesday of each month starting in June! The time will be from 5pm - 9pm. Range fee will be $5 per girl (ages 12 and up). Your first target is free. Additional targets are $1 each. Girls can also get a 1 hour private lesson for a $50 donation. Pre registration is required for private lessons. This is a great time for your ladies groups, co-workers, mom and daughter fun, or simply with your besties. There will be a safety course for those 12 to16 years of age so be sure to arrange your times now. This is ladies only...no men allowed! But do not worry guys...we got you covered. Every Friday night from 5pm-9pm is date night at the range! Range fees are $5 per person. What better date could you have? So ladies call (865) 248-8277 to make your lane reservation ASAP as space is limited.

Dec. 30th

WISE MEN STILL SEEK HIM! Emmanuel MESSIAH

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6 The Roane Reader

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December 2016

Tribute: Submit your Memorials, Dedications or just lift up those you love - FREE

Happy Anniversary Jim and Clara Miles 12 years Dec. 4th

To my husband: you are the man I have ever dreamed of. God must have sent you to me from heaven above. When I have been sick, you have been there. When I have needed prayer, you have been there, on every hour. When I need someone to talk to you’re there. When I need someone to walk with, you’re there. When I need someone to help clean house, you’re there. When I need someone to help me cook, you’re there. When I need someone to help do laundry, you’re there. When I get up of the morning you’re there. When I lay down at night, you’re there. You always put the finishing touch on everything that I do. I just want you to know that I really love you so I plan on spending many many more years with you.

Happy Birthday

To a Special Daddy at Christmas

If I could have one Christmas wish, one dream That would come true, I would pray to God with all my heart just to see and speak to you. A thousand words won’t bring you back, I know because I’ve tried, and neither will a million tears, I know because I’ve cried. You left behind a broken heart and precious memories too, But I never wanted memories Daddy, I only wanted you.

To my precious Daddy: Clifton Matheson December 17th From your Daughter: Kay Andrew Happy Birthday hope you have a great day.

Kelly Denise Guldin

In Loving Memory Of

Cole Heide

May 1st 1983 to September 16th 2003

Merry Christmas in Heaven Cole TO ALL PARENTS

“I’ll lend you, for a little while, a child of mine,� He said, “For you to love while he lives, and mourn when he is dead. “It may be six or seven years, or twenty, or three, “But will you, ‘til I call him back, take care of him for me? “He’ ll bring his charms to gladden you, and shall his stay be brief, “You’ll have his lovely memories as solace for your grief. “I cannot promise he will stay, as all from Earth return, “But there are lessons taught down there I want this child to learn, “I looked the wide world over in my search for teachers true, “And from the throngs that crowd life’s lanes, I have selected you. “Now will you give him all your love--not think the labor vain, “Nor hate me when I come to call to take him back again.� “I fancied that I heard them say, ‘Dear Lord, thy will be done.’ “For all the joy this child shall bring, the risk of grief we’ll run. “We’ll shower him with tenderness and love him while we may, “And for the happiness we’ve known, forever grateful stay. “And should the angels call for him much sooner than we planned, “We’ll brave the bitter grief that comes, and try to understand.�

Sadly missed by: Mom (Jill), Aunt Joni, Uncle Mike, Cousins Barrett, Jericka, (Grand) Johnny, (Nin) Darla and all who loved you.

Happy Birthday

Betty Sampson

REWARD FOR SAFE RETURN OR INFO LEADING TO SAFE RETURN - - NO QUESTIONS ASKED "Keeper" Last seen Harriman, TN October 12 @ 7: 45AM 16 - 18 inches tall, tan/white beagle mix. Neutered Male. White socks, Right front leg white. White tip tail dark eye brows.

'21Âś7&+$6(7$.(3,&,)3266,%/($1'&$//

December 16th Wonderful Lady, Friend, Mother & Sister.

Love you so much. Brad, Bernice, Edna & David Happy Birthday

Irene Petrosky

December 25th Very Merry Christmas & Blessed New Year

Love Your Favorite Sister Robert & Linda Cox Wartburg, TN


Phone: 865-882-9340

December 2016

Obituaries

Oct. 24th “Doc” Moore, 94, Kingston Oct. 25th Betty J. Halliburton, Rockwood Oct. 26th “Troubles” Butler, 68, Harriman Sherry Cross Fleming, 50, Kingston Oct. 28th Georgia Mullins, 88, Rockwood Oct. 31st

Nov. 11th James (J D) Hallcox, 93, Kingston Joyce Leffew, 83, Rockwood Boyd E. Edgemon, 92, Ten Mile Nov. 15th Kathy McElhaney, 61, Ten Mile Jessie M. Reed Sr., 91, Oliver Spgs Perry Lee Carroll, 66, Oliver Spgs Letha Lou Shelley, 82, Oliver Spgs Macil Ballard Pierce, 89, Rockwood Charles “Gunny” Maples, 71, Harriman Nov. 16th Virginia Inman Mee, 69, Rockwood Carolyn L. Phillips, 70, Midtown James E. Dean, 91, Harriman Nov. 17th Nov. 2nd ”Ms. Polly” Tinnell, 88, Kingston Franklin D. Goss, 76, Harriman John Burris, 79, Coalfield Kimberly D. Pace, 52, Kingston Lillie M. Daugherty, 95, Rockwood James “Buddy” Godsey, 69, Rockwood Jo Ann Simerly, 81, Rockwood Nov. 19th Nov. 3rd Joyce “Jodie” Futrell, 49, Harriman Ray Poland, 85, Midtown Irene W. Rogers, 86, Kingston Nov. 4th Nov. 20th George Galyon, Jr. 70, Ten Mile Freddie Seavers Jr. 70, Oliver Spgs Nov. 6th Pauline Marshall McGill, 76, Kingston Dorothy Nash, 102, Rockwood Nov. 22nd Nov. 7th Lorell Joseph, 73, Oakdale “JoAnne” Hovater, 81 Harriman Nov. 23rd Nov. 8th Jean Armstrong, 85, Kingston Thomas R. Paxton, 87, Harriman Tracy Smith, Jr., 44, Kingston John “Moose” Pugh, 51, Rockwood Eileen Manzano, 91, Oliver Spgs Nov. 9th "Jim" Ray Goad, 68, Oliver Spgs Jerry Hamby, 68, Rockwood Nov. 25th Nov. 10th Ruth Parks Renfro, 90, Kingston Billy Hamilton, 81, Kingston Judy Caroline Miles, 70, Rockwood Rita D. Story Manning, 80, Dyllis Joseph Bohannon, 83, Crab Orchard

Have Faith

A climber fell off a cliff, and as he tumbled down, he caught hold of a small branch wedged in the rock. “Help! Is there anybody up there?” he shouted. A majestic voice boomed through the gorge: “I will help you, my son, but first you must have faith in me.” “Yes, yes, I trust you!” cried the man. “Let go of the branch,” boomed the voice. There was a long pause, and the man shouted up again, “is there anyone else up there I could talk to?”

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7 The Roane Reader

Happy Birthday Our Long Liberal Nightmare Is Over At Least For Four Years in Heaven

Carol Brock Lemons Dec. 13th

“I love St. Jude’s Hospital. Please help support them”. (Kayden Christopher)

Happy Birthday

Mildred Miles Dec. 30th

just some reflections on the election by: Jerry Lemons

Socialists and leftists are howling like scalded dogs. There is wailing and gnashing of teeth. Rosie O'Donnell, Barbra Streisand, Gloria Steinham, Whoopie Goldberg and Stephen King have vowed to leave the U.S. and reside in China. Criminal illegal aliens, Muslim terrorists, fem-nazies, the ultra leftist press and media, pampered and spoiled college students and Black Lives Matter are having conniption fits and crying jags. Planned Parenthood, the ACLU, National Public Radio, Jane Fonda, Megan Kelly and the Washington Post have vowed to hold their breath till they're blue in the face. Bill and Hillary Clinton, Hussein Obama, Harry Reid, Nancy Pelosi, Governor Jerry Brown, Bruce Springsteen and Quentin Tarantino have suffered from hot flashes and are being sedated. Homosexuals and males who believe they're females have dug holes to bury their heads. The Southern Poverty Law Center, the American Federation of Teachers, industrial magnates and undemocratic fascists are having temper tantrums and messing in their pants. Proponents of NAFTA, ObamaCare, open borders, globalization, animal rights and the environment over people are contemplating joining monasteries and nunneries. After eight years the tide has finally turned. Eight years of minority rule, a reign of perversion, is over. The majority is now in control. The leftists/socialists/pervos that have ruled this country for the past eight years are broken, scattered, exploded. They are wandering aimlessly like the walking dead, scratching their heads, crying for mama, and wondering what went wrong. What happened on November 8, 2016 is not just a movement. It is a revolution. Both the Democrat and Republican parties have been put on notice. The radical socialists, leftists, perverted, elitist, cronies have been put on notice. The majority now rules. America has shaken off the ones who have been intent on making it a socialistic third-world country. Democracy now reigns supreme.

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Bible Quest

How many years were the Israelites in bondage in Egypt? When they heard of the adversity that had befallen Job, how many of his friends came to comfort him? Who is the only woman mentioned in Paul’s letter to Philemon? What part of the day did Christ embark on the boat from which He calmed the waters? The Bible says Jesus had four brothers. What were their names? After his epiphany, how long did Paul spend in Arabia before beginning his ministry? How many troops did Sennacherib lose at the siege of Jerusalem? Who was the father of John the Baptist? How many demons came out of Mary called Magdalene? When the multitude came out to be baptized, how did John the Baptist characterize them?

Bible Quest Answers

(Exodus 12:40-41) (Job 2:11) (Philemon 2) (Mark 4:35)

(Mark 6:3/Matthew 13:55) (Luke 8:2) (Galatians 1:18 (Luke 3:7) (2 Kings 19:35) (Luke 3:2)

Bible Facts

The Bible was written over a 1600 year period by approximately 40 men. The time of the writing was from 1500 BC to AD 100. While the Bible is 1 book, it contain 66 smaller books. The books of the Old Testament were written before the birth of Jesus Christ and the New Testament covers the life of Christ and beyond. Each of the books, except 5, are divided into chapters and verses. The 5 which aren’t divided by chapters are Obadiah, Philemon, 2 John, 3 John, and Jude. These are short books which only have verse divisions. Chapters were introduced to the Bible in 1238 by Cardinal Hugo de S. Caro. Verse divisions were not added until 1551 by Robertus Stephanus.

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December 2016

Bible Beat

Be Ready for Jesus, Matthew 24:37-44

Look out your window. Jesus is coming. Jesus is in everyone you meet. He is in your parents. He is in your neighbor. He is in your mail carrier. Everyone who helps you was sent by Jesus Christ. Ask Jesus to forgive you when you hurt others. Ask Jesus every morning to help you do good things for those around you. Then you will be ready when Jesus comes for you. Then you will go to heaven with him.

Across 2. approached 4. builder of ark 7. at what time 10. land for playing baseball 12. and for this reason 14. pair 17. got ready 20. entire 22. used to be 23. existed 24. has to 26. happening in the future 27. not working 31. crunching 33. went away 35. also 36. opposite of down 37. those people 39. in no way 40. remain 41. rhymes with could Down 1. toted 3. male person

4. time of darkness 5. robbed 6. overflow of water 8. went inside 9. in front of 11. got something done 13. await

Happy Birthday

Alicia Christopher

15. understood 16. ruler over a slave 18. too 19. sipping 21. allowed 22. opposite of men 25. male child 28. sole

29. taking in food 30. up to a certain time 32. more than one day 33. head person in charge 34. opposite of in 38. used to own

What are the Three Gifts? While participating in a church Christmas pageant many years past, I had the good fortune to be chosen as the narrator. Each rehearsal went off well and then on the night of the show, I, in a loud and penetrating voice, announced the gifts of the Magi as “gold, Frankenstein, and myrrh.”

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December 2016

Be Ready for Jesus, Matthew 24:37-44 You do not know when Jesus will come for you. You do not know when you will die. However, you must be ready for Jesus all the time. Love God and love your neighbor as yourself every day of your life. Forgive yourself and forgive others. Then you will be ready for Jesus. Y D N I N T O H A D G R I N D I N G T O M O T W K T P E X P E C T D A Y S W U A N B H H O T S O N T G U N T I L O S N E R I O O H P M Z D R I N K I N G E L H O C U B I A L S O M K U W H E N A E O K H S M E Y H A V E K N O W N T T F U E A E A F W C F Q U W O M E N H I T R N I W R C I C T B E F O R E Y I N H O U T E R A L W O T H O S E Z W S G E A L L R Y M L O L N C A R R I E D U N S U U E I E L U O R X P W A S B E P T M U S T N S E L R I T R Q Q M N D D E G N K A G C T D D Q R E Y V A T X F R I I Y R T H E Y N O T P Q Q S S K I E V G N K S T A W A K E A O A T U N E D I H A K C O M I N G V R H Y E R O L U N T T H E R E F O R E E P Q R E A D N G I J T A K E N F Y H D Y P L U H F L O O D M D I D Y M I L L S T A Y Z all also ark awake before broken came carried coming days did drinking eating entered expect

field flood giving grinding had have hour house into known left let Lord man marrying

master mill must night Noah not one out prepared son stay sure taken therefore they

thief this those too two until up was were when which will women would you

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Bible Beat

Christmas Shopping

It was just before Christmas and the magistrate was in a happy mood. He asked the prisoner who was in the dock, ‘What are you charged with?’ The prisoner replied, ‘Doing my Christmas shopping too early.’ ‘That’s no crime’, said the magistrate. ‘Just how early were you doing this shopping?’ ‘Before the shop opened’, answered the prisoner.

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Bible Trivia 1.In what city was Jesus born? 2.How many books are in the New Testament? 3.What type of insect did John the Baptist eat in the desert? 4.Who were the first apostles called to follow Jesus? 5.How many people did Jesus feed with five loaves of bread and two fish? 6.After Jesus was arrested, which apostle disowned him three times? 7.Who recognized Jesus as the Messiah when he was presented at the Temple as a baby? 8.Who asked Pilate for Jesus’ body after the crucifixion? 9.Paul was shipwrecked on what island? 10.What is the shortest book in the New Testament?

Trivia Answers

Bethlehem For unto you is born 27 this day in the city of Locusts Peter and Andrew David a Saviour, which about 5000 men is Christ the Lord. Luke 2:11 The Christmas Train

Peter Simeon Joseph of Arimathea Malta 2 John

The pastor was out Christmas shopping for his family when he saw a great train set display in the high-end toy store. After 10 minutes of rapt watching, he told the sales woman, “I’ll take it.” “Your son will really like it,” she beamed. The pastor thought a moment and said, “In that case, I’ll take two.”

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December 2016

Parking Lot Etiquette

Spread your Christmas Cheer! Often, in our hurry to get into the store to pick up a few things before heading home, or in the throes of holiday shopping, we disregard courtesy and respect for other drivers looking for that perfect parking space. It is regrettable that in our hurried up lifestyles, common etiquette is seldom observed, but if you would like to ponder parking lot etiquette, here are some steps you can take. Waiting for a parking space Use your turn signal. Signaling to others when reaching a desired parking spot will reduce unnecessary confusion in the parking lot. It is often thought that when two cars reach a parking spot at the same time from opposite directions, the one that turns their turn signal on first, claims the spot. Park only in designated spaces. Parking along the curb, with the exception of loading zones, or for loading a heavy item or helping a less mobile individual with their load is annoying and often dangerous. Do not block other parking space seekers while you wait for a space to open up near the store entrance. The drivers in the cars behind you may be finished with their errands, and are ready to head for work or home. If the person is already pulling out, that's one thing. But if you're sitting there while they walk to the car, waiting while they put their bags in the car, etc. you'll be trying the patience of every other car behind you, especially if they can't go around you. Parking accurately in car spaces Center your vehicle in its parking space. Overhanging the stripes will tend to crowd the driver who parks in the adjacent space, and frequently leads to door dings in the paint of cars. Know how to Park a Truck or Large Vehicle neatly if you have one, or if your vehicle is large in relation to your local parking spaces because they are too small. Pull your vehicle all the way into the space. This makes it easier for other drivers to see past your car when they are backing out of adjacent spaces, and also gives the widest possible driving lane between spaces. This can be particularly helpful when shoppers pushing loaded carts are sharing the driving lane with moving vehicles. The exception would be a very small compact or sub-compact vehicle. With small cars such as a Mini Cooper or Smart, parking so that the back end of your car is equal with the cars beside you lets drivers know that the space is occupied and does not give the false impression that the parking spot is vacant. Don't pull too far forward If you drive a small car (Honda Fit, Smart Car, KIA Rio, etc.) do not pull so far forward that your car cannot be seen as a person drives down the lane, looking for a spot. Pull into the spot, out of the lane of traffic, but not so far that your car is unable to be seen from the lane. You may be saving yourself damage from someone who sees the "open" space and pulls in a BIT too quickly. Never force your car into a space. In crowded, busy parking lots, special compact car spaces are becoming more common. Standard parking spaces are generally 9 feet (2.7 m) wide while compact car spaces are only 7 feet (2.1 m) wide. Obviously, a large SUV or Pickup will not fit easily in a compact car space, and quite simply put, they are not supposed to. Things to watch out for in parking lots Watch for drivers backing out of blind spots. Small cars parked between larger vehicles like vans and SUVs often have to back blindly out of their spaces, so be alert and give them a break. If you are walking past a car in this situation, pause for a moment and guide the driver out of the tight spot if you are able. Observe the legal aspects of driving in a parking lot. You are not likely to be pulled over by the police, but there are laws regarding operating a motor vehicle in a public parking lot, just as there are on the highway. Here are some things to watch for. •Posted speed limits. Many large parking lots do have posted speed limits, these are for the safety of pedestrians and other drivers, please note and obey them. •One Way signs and markings. In parking lots with diagonal spaces, individual lanes may be one way, most often marked with a directional arrow painted on the pavement at the end of each lane. Even if the lane is not marked, you may be safe to assume the lane is one way if the diagonal spaces are oriented in the same direction on both sides. •Stop and Yield signs. These serve the same purpose in parking lots they serve on city streets, allowing the right-of-way to a vehicle driving in a certain lane or direction, and should be obeyed. •Handicapped and elderly spaces. Handicapped parking spaces are generally clearly marked with signs and special striping, and are wider than regular spaces to accommodate wheel chairs. They are located near disabled ramps, usually very close to the business's entrance. If you do not require the use of these spaces, and do not have a permit, park somewhere else. •Pedestrian crosswalks. These are common near the main entrances and exits of most large businesses, for the safety of pedestrians returning to their cars. They are usually marked with diagonal white or yellow stripes, and often also are marked with a pedestrian crossing or stop sign. •Turn signals. Using turn signals gives other drivers an idea what your intentions are, use them in a timely manner to indicate what you are doing.

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Kay Christopher and Justin Stout


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December 2016

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The Legend of the Christmas Stocking The most popular legend about why stockings are hung at Christmas goes something like this: A recently widowed man and father of three girls was having a tough time making ends meet. Even though his daughters were beautiful, he worried that their impoverished status would make it impossible for them to marry. St. Nicholas was wandering through the town where the man lived and heard villagers discussing that family’s plight. He wanted to help but knew the man would refuse any kind of charity directly. Instead, one night, he slid down the chimney of the family’s house and filled the girls’ recently laundered stockings, which happened to be drying by the fire, with gold coins. And then he disappeared. The girls awoke in the morning, overjoyed upon discovering the bounty. Because of St. Nick’s generosity, the daughters were now eligible to wed and their father could rest easy that they wouldn’t fall into lonely despair. Whew! While obviously far-fetched, this tale of unknown origin and date is most widely referenced when it comes to the history of the Christmas stocking.

Santa Pulls An All-Nighter He may know when you are sleeping, but the only way for Santa to get the job done is to stay up all night on December 24th -- and that can lead to some serious health concerns. Studies have suggested that drowsy driving is as dangerous as drunk driving. "You could imagine poor Santa being impaired as someone who is legally drunk," says Michael Decker, Ph.D., an associate professor at Georgia State University and spokesman for the American Academy of Sleep Medicine -- just think of the multiple reindeer pileups that could ensue. And even when he's parked on the rooftops, sleep deprivation can cause judgment to become fuzzier, meaning the wrong presents are bound to be traveling down the wrong chimneys. What's worse is that sleep loss has a cumulative effect, and Santa has been working hard, likely cutting back on sleep, for the entire month preceding Christmas. "As people lose sleep, they have problems responding quickly to specific objects," Decker explains. "You could just imagine the things that would happen if you respond later than you need to ... it's easy to fly over the house or miss the roof." Once the night is over, Decker recommends that Santa get some extra sleep to restore his deficit -- and while he's at it, he may want to be evaluated for sleep apnea, as obesity is a risk factor.

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December 2016

Aunt Hattie's "Hurry-Up" Recipes

Household Hints Don't procrastinate -- start cleaning now. Our 7-Day Cleaning Plan maps out a few major tasks to accomplish daily, so all that's left the day your guests arrive is a handful of last-minute touch-ups. Day 1 - Turn do-it-yourself tasks into a do-it-ourselves effort -gather family members, go over the plan, and assign chores. Remember: many hands make light work. Day 2 - Wash windows and vacuum window screens. Damp-mop baseboards. Launder and press window and shower curtains. Launder bedspreads if needed. Day 3 - Deep-clean bathrooms and medicine cabinets. Straighten bedrooms; remove clutter and donate or store out of sight. Day 4 - Straighten coat closet, making room for guests' coats. Add extra hangers if needed. Wash throw rugs; set aside so they are nice and fluffy for party day. Day 5 - Clean range or stove top, surfaces, and grates. Clean out the refrigerator, making room for party foods; dust top of refrigerator. Wipe down all large and small appliances. Wipe down kitchen cabinets. Take recycling to recycling bins or facilities. Day 6 - Sweep entryway, polish the doorknob, and decorate the entry with seasonal touches. Dust all surfaces, including bookshelves, photo frames, and art. Don't forget the ceiling fans. Clean kitchen sink and dish drainer. Day 7 - Time to party! Here are a few day-of touch-ups: Clean trash receptacles and add fresh liners. Wipe down any dirty areas in the bathroom using household cleaner and paper towels. Wipe down bathroom mirrors and counters. Wipe down floors with a damp towel. Put toilet bowl cleaner in the toilets; brush. Hang fresh towels and put out fresh hand soap. Damp-mop the kitchen floor, vacuum carpets and mop wood floors. Fluff sofa cushions and pillows. Decorate with special touches, such as flowers or candles.

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HATTIE SHILLINGS Merry Christmas!

Christmas Cream Cheese Cookies

3 oz cream cheese 1 teaspoon vanilla 1 cup butter 2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour 1 egg yolk optional food coloring and sprinkles 1 cup sugar Preheat oven for 325. In a large bowl cream the butter, sugar and cream cheese. Add egg yolk and vanilla. Add flour a little at a time and mix until well blended. Knead dough into a ball. Optional: You can separate dough and add a couple drops of food coloring to get colorful Christmas Cookies. Roll out dough and use cookie cutters to make shapes, add dough to a cookie press, or drop spoonfuls of dough on cookie sheet. Use un-greased cookie sheet. Add sugar sprinkles before baking. Bake for 10-15 minutes. Cookies will remain light in color. They will be a little darker on the bottom.

Apple Pie Gingerbread Cookies Apple Pie Cake Filling optional egg Gingerbread man cookie cutter, sprinkles Pillsbury Pie Crust Roll out the Pillsbury Pie Crust. Use Gingerbread cookie cutters to make shapes. The shapes need to be in pairs. Separate the shapes into pairs. Spoon a little of the apple pie filling in the middle of one gingerbread man. Use the second gingerbread man to cover the one with the filling. Repeat with each pair of gingerbread men. Using your fingers go around the edges of the gingerbread man pushing together so no pie filling can come out. Optional: brush egg white over gingerbread man and add sprinkles. Bake for 20 minutes until pie crust is lightly brown.

Chocolate Reindeer Cookies

1 cup butter 1 cup sugar 3 cups flour 1/3 cup unsweetened coca powder 1 teaspoon vanilla 1 teaspoon baking soda

3 eggs 1/2 teaspoon salt small pretzel shape pretzels (for antlers about 70) M&M’s red gum drops

In a large bowl beat butter and sugar until creamy. Add in coca powder,baking soda, and salt. Beat in egg and vanilla. Add in flour a little at a time. Keep mixing until well blended. On a light floured surface roll dough into circles or reindeer face shape (circular on top, slightly pointed on bottom) Add one pretzel to the top side of each circle, M&M’s as eyes and red gum drops as the nose. Bake for 9 minutes or until edges are firm.

Happy Birthday

Ryder Taylor Dec. 17th

Great After Christmas Idea!

When younger kids begin to get bored with their toys, put some of the toys away for a few weeks, then bring them back out. Alternate the toys every few weeks and the kids think they have something new to play with.

If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.

NOTICE

Some of our recipes, hints and articles are submitted by our readers and we take no responsibility for their accuracy or consequences.

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Easy, inexpensive crafts for Christmas Decorating Take clear vases or bottles, fill them with water, and add holiday-colored food coloring—a few drops will do. Then line the bottles up in a row, or decorate with floating candles for a festive touch. Plain dry branches from your yard—whether from green firs or bare deciduous trees—make excellent decorations when you spray with silver or gold paint. Hang, or tuck in a vase to decorate an entryway or dining room. Plus, add ornaments to the branches for an instant Christmas tree. Spray paint artificial trees (big or small) with white paint for a clean, sophisticated decoration. By folding a magazine page over page, you can turn it into a cute, cheap Christmas magazine craft. Trim with tinsel and ornaments left over from your holiday decorating, or spray gold or silver. Grab your favorite hot chocolate brand and toppings, a clear mug or mason jar, and start layering. Keep a few stashed in the guest room for visitors who stay with you during the holidays. All they need to do is add hot water and enjoy! These are great gifts that you can decorate differently each time. Paint your plastic bulbs with chalkboard paint, let dry, then start drawing your holiday decorations on them. Take a clear ornament, add clear floor wax inside, pour in glitter of your choice, shake and enjoy! Dip pine cones in gold paint (either partially or all of the way) or use a mixture of water, glue, and glitter for a sparkling effect. Place on side tables or use to fill baskets and bowls. Put some simple odds and ends to good use for this easy craft. Get an empty, clean can and glue candy canes around it. Tie with a red ribbon, and fill with artificial (or real) poinsettias, or Christmas candy. Reuse old bulbs by spray painting them a Christmas color. Gold or silver are beautiful on them. The paint on most older glass ornaments will peel off if you soak them in water for a few minutes. Then let them dry and fill with feathers, twigs, small candies, or yarn. Let your imagination run wild on this one.

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Renew Your Couch Has your sofa seen better days? Saggy cushions are probably to blame. But no need to rush out for a brand-new couch—just revive what you’ve got. Unzip the covers, then perk up cushion backs by adding polyester fiber stuffing, and wrap quilt batting around the original seat cushions to add some oomph. Hammer decorative nails along the edges of your couch seams to create a trim that makes a cheap sofa look expensive. To get the job done faster, buy a long strip from a craft store instead of attaching individual nails. A fabric skirt at the bottom of a couch can make even a classic couch look dated. Give your sofa’s legs some attention by getting rid of the skirt. Pull out the staples underneath, then attach the rest of the fabric underneath to keep it streamlined. For a no-sew seat upgrade, just wrap each cushion with a large piece of fabric, tucking the excess underneath to hold it in place. If you need quick cover for the whole sofa, skip the pricey slipcover and drape a large sheet, throw or blanket over the whole piece of furniture for a comfy upgrade. Switching out the legs can breathe new life into a sofa that’s in otherwise good condition. Simply lay the couch on its back, remove the old legs, and screw on the new ones. For an even bigger pop, stick with the old legs, but paint them a bright color to kick things up.

13 The Roane Reader

Penny Pinchers For plastic use WD-40 and let it soak on the item for a couple minutes to remove stickers easily. For metal use nail polish remover on a cotton ball and let soak in for a couple minutes to remove stickers easily. For wood use vegetable oil and let it soak in for thirty minutes. Scrape off sticker with a Teflon scraper. To clean greasy, grimy hands pour some olive oil over them and rub oil into hands. Take some paper towels and wipe off the gook. If they aren't clean yet, simply repeat the process until are. Then to remove the olive oil run some very warm water over your hands and dry hands with a paper towel. Make a hand cleaning paste by mixing corn meal and apple cider vinegar. Mix 10 drops lemon oil, 2 Tbsp. lemon juice, and 1/4 cup olive oil. Keep in a capped bottle and use to dust with. Use a soft clean cloth. Erasers can be used to erase scuff marks on floors. Put a thumb tack on the leg that is uneven to stop the wobbling. Permanent marker on appliances/counter tops (like store receipt BLUE!) Use rubbing alcohol on a paper towel. Candles will last a lot longer if placed in the freezer for at least 3 hours prior to burning. Generally, lipstick can be removed from washable clothing with isopropyl rubbing alcohol. Use two hand towels; put one down and place the lipstick stain face down on it. Dab the back of the stain with the other towel, which has been dipped into the alcohol. Repeat until stain is gone. If there’s any residue, use a pre-spotter or stain remover before laundering and let air dry to be sure the stain is gone. Lipsticks today have newer formulas, such as long-lasting or those with a lot of gloss. Several treatments may be needed to remove these stains. Suddenly you notice a stain, but it really isn’t a mystery because it probably was there when the garment was put away or actually laundered, but did not come out totally. These stains frequently are from a light-colored liquid, such as a clear soft drink or white wine that contains sugar. If you’ve tried all of the normal spot-and-stain removers without success, give this a try: If the garment is white or light colored, use three-percent hydrogen peroxide on a cotton swab to dab at the stain. Allow it to set for several hours because it acts as a milder, slower bleaching agent.

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December 2016

People are finally showing some curiosity about the annuity option for retirement planning. I’ve been writing about life annuities for many years, but it was only after a seminar a few weeks ago that investors began asking a lot of questions about how these solid generators of guaranteed income-for-life Bob Tonachio work! Some of the most thought-provoking questions have been gathered up with answers supplied by insurers and other knowledgeable advisers.

How are annuities taxed? There are a few types of non-registered annuities… These annuities are taxed quite advantageously, and they’re widely accessible to individuals. Payments in a prescribed annuity are considered to be a blend of your own capital being paid back to you and interest. Tax is paid on the interest portion, says J.N., assistant vice-president of tax, retirement and estate planning services at Manulife. The formula used to calculate the taxable amount in an annuity payment includes a projected lifespan for the annuity buyer. Longer lifespan expectations will come into play in 2017, and that will result in more tax payable. Even so, J.N. points out that not even 10 per cent of the payments from the annuity would be taxable under 2017 rules for a 65-year-old male. “It’s not quite as good as it was, but it’s still very tax-effective,” he says. How are insurance agents and advisers compensated for selling annuities versus other products? A financial adviser and managing director at Vancouver’s Rogers Financial Group, says he would get a commission of roughly 2.5 per cent on money clients use to buy an annuity. By comparison, he says advisers and their firms could make more than that over just a few years on a fee-based account in which the client pays 1 per cent of assets. “Annuities don’t pay agents or advisors quite as well as other investment strategies” Usually a fixed annuity would not charge the client’s funds a commission. What age is best to buy an annuity? Most advisors suggests 60 and up. Why so late? Because the later you buy, the shorter the period of time the insurer selling an annuity expects to have to pay you. As a result, payments are higher than they would be if you bought at a younger age. “The older you are, the better it is.“and if you’re a man, it’s even better because your life expectancy is not as high as a woman’s.” How can I compare annuity rates? Part of the reason why annuities have somewhat limited popularity is that it’s extremely difficult to compare payouts from various insurers. You may be able to find an insurance company that offers an online annuity calculator for its own products. But comparing that payout with those from other companies based on your particular needs is hard to do on the Internet without having to supply your name and personal information. An independent agent who represents as many as 30 different companies directly… usually will be able to show you who offers the highest rates. Where can one buy them? Advisers licensed in your state of residence to sell insurance products offer them, and so do agents working directly for life insurance companies. The insurance arms of major banks may also sell annuities. Is there a do-it-yourself annuity that you can buy yourself? No. “Annuities are sold through a licensed, financial adviser,” says Kimberly Ezell, Robert James’s vice-president of Administration and Guaranteed Retirement Products. “There’s nothing that you can do yourself to bypass the licensed adviser.” Why do annuity rates vary so much between insurers? Insurers use the following factors to set returns on annuities: Age, gender, how much the client is putting in, interest rates and the company’s own financial position. It’s the latter variable that may explain why some companies are paying notably more than others at any given time. “Sometimes certain companies that don’t specialize in annuities decide they want to be aggressive on annuities, and sometimes they don’t,” Mrs. Ezell says. “There are lots of companies out there that would rather be pushing segregated funds because they think they can make more money with them. ”A company’s changing needs can alter its pricing on certain annuities over a short period of time. Mrs. Ezell says that not too long ago we got a quote for a 74-year-old client on a $250,000 an index annuity with annual payments of $21,000. When we checked again a month later, the quoted payment from the same company had fallen by $1,000 per year. We usually do not have this experience with quality companies offering guaranteed lifetime income accounts. The current offerings on Guaranteed Lifetime Income Accounts… 10% Bonus Interest day one and 6% minimum, guaranteed growth rate… Income guaranteed for both husband and wife for life! Bob Tonachio is President and CEO of Robert James & Associates, Inc. He may be contacted at 865-376-4925. He has been specializing in guaranteed annuity products for retirement accounts for over 30 years.


December 2016

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Reindeer Facts

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Little old lady

Reindeer are also known as Caribou. In Europe they are called George the preacher, in his Reindeer all the time. America we called them Caribou in the wild Sunday sermon, used "Forgive Your Enemies" as his subject. and when domesticated we call them Reindeer. After a long sermon, he asked Scientific Name: Rangifer Tarasndus. how many were willing to Reindeer live in the Northern parts of North America including forgive their enemies. About Canada and Alaska also in Europe, Russia and Greenland. Lets us half held up their hands. not forget with Santa at the North Pole. Not satisfied he ranted and They live on tundras. A tundra is a vast flat, treeless Arctic Region. raved for another twenty minutes and repeated his question. This Reindeer are herbivores meaning they are plant eaters. time he received a response They eat lichen a type of moss, grass and plants. of about 80 percent. Still dissatisA reindeer can live up to 15 years in the wild. fied, he lectured for another A reindeer mostly has different shades of brown soft fur with white 15 minutes and repeated his fur on their neck and parts of their back. Their fur may also be gray question. With all thoughts now on Sunday dinner, all responded or a rust like color. except one elderly lady in the They can weigh anywhere between 240-700 pounds. rear. Reindeer are usually 4-5 ft tall not including their antlers. Their "Mrs. Jones, why are you antlers are 3ft tall! not willing to forgive your eneDid you know that reindeer are the only deer in which both male and mies?" "I don't have any." "Mrs. Jones, that is very unusual. How females grow antlers. They shed their antlers in the winter. old are you?" "Ninety-three." Reindeer antlers are actually rubbery, living masses of blood and "Mrs. Jones, please come down marrow when they are growing. The antlers grown until around in front and tell the congregation August, then the bone begins to harden. how a person can live to be nineLike a humans fingerprint no two reindeer antlers are exactly the ty-three, and not have an enemy same. in the world." Reindeer migrate, during the winter reindeer’s migrate South. The little sweetheart of a lady During the summer they migrate North. The trip is 1,200 miles tottered down the aisle, very round trip. That is one of the world’s largest migrations. slowly turned around and said: Their hooves are used to dig for food in the snow. The outer edges "It's easy ... I just outlived them of their hooves are sharp while help them walk on ice and rocks. all ...

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What A Grandmother Is: (According to some first graders)

A grandmother is a lady who has no children of her own, so she likes other people's little girls. A Grandfather is a man grandmother. He goes for walks with the boys, and they talk about fishing and tractors and like that. Grandmas don't have to do anything excerpt be there. They're old, so they shouldn't play hard or run. It is enough if they drive us to market where the pretend horse is and have lots of dimes ready. Or if they take us for walks, they should slow down past pretty leaves and caterpillars. They should never, ever say "Hurry Up". Usually they are fat, but not too fat to tie kids' shoes. They wear glasses, funny underwear and can take off their teeth and gums. It is better if they don't typewrite, or play cards except with us. They don't have to be smart, only answer questions like why dogs hate cats and how come God isn't married. They don't talk baby talk like visitors do, because it is hard to understand. When they read to us they don't skip or mind if it is the same story again. Everybody should try to have one, especially if you don't have a TV, because grandmas are the only grownups who have got time.

Office Holiday Memo

To: All Employees From: Management Subject: Office conduct during the Christmas season Effective immediately, employees should keep in mind the following guidelines in compliance with FROLIC (the Federal Revelry Office and Leisure Industry Council). Running aluminum foil through the paper shredder to make tinsel is discouraged. Playing Jingle Bells on the push-button phone is forbidden (it runs up an incredible long distance bill) Work requests are not to be filed under “Bah humbug.” Company cars are not to be used to go over the river and through the woods to Grandma’s house. Seven Signs Your Police Reindeer’s have an ankle tendon which rubs over a bone causing Partner Needs a Vacation All fruitcake is to be eaten BEFORE July 25. a clicking sound when they walk. That clicking sound helps the 7. Every Tuesday he insists it's Egg nog will NOT be dispensed in vending machines. reindeer keep track of each other especially when they can’t see in In spite of all this, the staff is encouraged to have a Happy Holiday. his turn to be the siren. bad weather. 6. He wants you to call him Did you know that reindeer can run 50 miles per hour! "Judge Dredd", and he insists that all suspects should be A male reindeer is called a Buck. executed right there on the spot. A female reindeer is called a Doe 5. He talks to himself. Half of A baby reindeer is called a Fawn him is the "good cop", and the A mother usually gives birth to one fawn a year but sometimes two other half is the "bad cop". 4. He keeps asking you if his are born. bullet proof vest makes him look A fawn is usually 10-11 pounds when born. CLEANING UP? fat. A reindeer’s milk has more fat than cow’s milk. 3. He is exchanging donut WE HAVE DUMPSTER --------------------------------------------------------------------------------- recipes with complete strangers. RENTALS AVAILABLE 2. He wants to hear less talk Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great and more music on the police king from history. Spades - King David; Clubs - Alexan- channel. der the Great; Hearts -Charlemagne; and Diamonds - 1. He keeps handcuffing himself by accident!! Julius Caesar.

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The Broom The little boy was helping his mom around the house, and he left the broom on the back porch. His mother was cleaning up the kitchen when she realized that her broom was missing. She asked the little boy about the broom and he told her where it was. She then asked him to please go get it. The little boy informed his mom that he was afraid of the dark and didn’t want to go out to get the broom. His mother smiled and said “The Lord is out there too, don’t be afraid.” The little boy opened the back door a little and said “Lord if you’re out there, please hand me the broom.”

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December 2016

Amazing Bible Facts

There are many books written about and by various religions. But the Bible is the only one which includes the actual words of God. Those who believe the Bible also believe that God inspired various people through the years to write down His actual words for mankind. The Bible says more than 3,000 times “thus saith the Lord.” And the words which follow are quotes from God. There were several secular historians who wrote about the events of the New Testament at the same time the Bible was being written. Josephus is the most well-known of them. He was a Jewish historian. Tacitus was a Roman historian who would have no benefit from not telling the truth. Both these men, as well as others, can be used to back up the historical accuracy of the Bible. There are historical discoveries regularly coming to light that continue to support the accuracy of the Bible. Merrill Unger, who compiled a Bible dictionary wrote, “Old Testament archeology has rediscovered whole nations, resurrected important peoples, and in a most astonishing manner filled in historical gaps, adding immeasurably to the knowledge of Biblical backgrounds.”

The Inn is Full A Jewish lady named Mrs. Rosenberg many years ago was stranded late one night at a fashionable resort – one that did not admit Jews. The desk clerk looked down at his book and said, “Sorry, no room. The hotel is full.” The Jewish lady said, “But your sign says that you have vacancies.” The desk clerk stammered and then said curtly, “You know that we do not admit Jews. Now if you will try the other side of town…” Mrs. Rosenberg stiffened noticeable and said, “I’ll have you know I converted to your religion.” The desk clerk said, “Oh, yeah, let me give you a little test. How was Jesus born?” Mrs. Rosenberg replied, “He was born to a virgin named Mary in a little town called Bethlehem.” “Very good,” replied the hotel clerk. “Tell me more.” Mrs. Rosenberg replied, “He was born in a manger.” “That’s right,” said the hotel clerk. “And why was he born in a manger?” Mrs. Rosenberg said loudly, “Because a jerk like you in the hotel wouldn’t give a Jewish lady a room for the night!”

Confused Did you hear about the dyslexic agnostic insomniac? He would stay up all night wondering about the existence of doG.

A Letter to God

A Sunday school teacher challenged her children to take some time on Sunday afternoon to write a letter to God. They were to bring their letter back the following Sunday. One little boy wrote, “Dear God, We had a good time at church today. Wish you could have been there.”


December 2016

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Blackout Survival Tips

ARE YOU PREPARED? A brief power outage might mean that you have to depend upon a flashlight to find your way to the bathroom at night and throw out the milk that spoiled in the refrigerator. It's an event that is annoying and inconvenient, but readily endurable, since after all, you know the electricity is coming back in a few hours. A prolonged, massive failure of the electrical grid, in contrast, could be a dire, life-threatening situation. While the odds of a long-term, nationwide blackout are remote, experts advise taking steps to prepare for a number of disaster scenarios that might leave you without power for an extended period of time. Here are some tips. SUPPLIES Assemble multiple caches of disaster supplies. The Federal Emergency Management Agency recommends that you keep food, water and other essential supplies in different locations, so that you wont be caught without them no matter where you are. In your home, FEMA recommends keeping a two-week ration of food, water, and other supplies (such as batteries) that you would need in a disaster. Additionally, you should keep a grab and go container of food and water and a pair of comfortable walking shoes at your workplace, in case you need to hike a lengthy distance to get home during an outage. Finally, you should keep another cache of supplies in your car trunk, including food, water, first aid supplies, flares and jumper cables. WATER IS CRITICAL Make sure you have enough water. Humans need clean potable water to survive, not just for drinking, but for cooking and bathing as well. FEMA recommends that you count upon needing at least a gallon of water per person for each day of an emergency. WATER STORAGE AND PURIFICATION Ideally, you should either buy commercially bottled water or food-grade plastic water storage containers from a military surplus or camping supply store, which you can fill on your own. If you decide to economize, you can use plastic soda bottles, but be sure to scrub them thoroughly beforehand with dish-washing soap and sanitize them with household bleach. Fill the containers with tap water and seal them tightly. Store the water in a cool dark place. If you want to take things a step further, survival-expert James Wesley Rawles recommends that you acquire equipment that will enable you to purify water from streams and other bodies of water, such as an ultraviolet purification wand and a ceramic filter designed to remove pathogens and impurities. If you buy one of the ultraviolet light units, be sure to also stock up on the particular type of batteries that it requires. FOOD PREPARATION Choose survival foods that will be usable in an emergency situation. Remember that in the event of a blackout, you won't be able to rely upon your refrigerator, electric range, or microwave oven. So, think about storing prepared, packaged, or canned foods that will last a long time. Also consider long-lasting staples—beans, for example—that you can prepare on a camp stove without electricity. FOOD STORAGE You'll want to store your main food supply at home in tightly closed plastic or metal containers to protect it from pests and extend its shelf life. When you fill the containers, mark the date on them, and remember to replace your food supplies if you don't use them in six months. LIGHT SOURCES Make sure you can see in the dark. The official blog of insurance giant Allstate reminds you that it's important to stock multiple sources of light, including flashlights, headlamps, and lanterns. Make sure you have an ample supply of batteries for your light sources. STAYING WARM The face of Uncle Be prepared for surviving in cold weather. Sam, the fictional If an outage occurs in the winter, you can use blankets or even bubble wrap to insulate windows. personification ESCAPE ROUTE of the United Plan an escape route, in case you need one.

Did You Know That... The word "limelight" that is used in theatre to refer to the performers on the stage originated because before electricity was available lime was burned in a lamp, which created a white light that was directed at the performers.

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Dec. 24th

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Gods Only Son

Luke 1:26-38 by: Katie Bailey Randolph

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The Roane Reader proudly presents THE WRITER'S PAGE

Christmas

God sent the angel Gabriel to a city of Galilee, to speak to a virgin named Mary, by: Donna Kay Reynolds the wife of Joseph, to be. A time of joy laughter love The angel said unto her, "God highly favors thee. We need to give thanks above Blessed art thou among women thou Mary of Galilee. As family and friends gather near Behold thou shalt conceive in thy womb to stand under the mistletoe with someone dear and bring forth God's own Son, Lights are lined up and down the streets and thou shalt call His name Jesus Bands march in parades giving drum beats that God's will might be done. Children placing decorations on their trees And behold, thy cousin Elizabeth, We tell the story of the shepherds and three Kings she hath also conceived a son." As pages are turned from the Bible on the table Now Gabriel had told Zacharias We tell from the pages of Baby Jesus in "his name shall be called John." a manger in the stable So Mary said to the angel, "Behold the handmaid of the Lord. Let it be unto me according to Thy word." John came fist to make ready Dec. 16th a people prepared for the Lord by: Katie Bailey Randolph But Jesus came to die for us according to God's Eleven days before election, isn't that a coincidence? own word. The number 11 in God's Word means "judgment" While Jesus walked upon this earth Will Hillary finally pay for her sins? many miracles He performed The Word of God tells us "be sure, your sins will find you out"; But they knew Him not as Savior, Mr, Comey, do your job! The Son of God was scorned. You know she sold this country out! He gave His life upon the cross that we might be set free. Then took His place at God's right hand by: Gary Spreacker and intercedes for you and me. John 6:20

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Edna Andrew

HiLIARy

It Is I. Be Not Afraid

Jerry’s Used Furniture Furniture - Appliances & Gift Items WE BUY GOOD USED FURNITURE ONE PIECE OR ENTIRE ROOMS

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When the storms of life o'er take you; It is I. Be not afraid. Fear not, for I have redeemed you; It is I. Be not afraid. When thou passest through the waters, I'm with you. Be not afraid. It is I, your Lord and Savior. Why should you then be afraid? To the end I will be with you; It is I. Be not afraid. Thou art mine: by name I've called you; It is I. Be not afraid. When you walk through fires of trouble, I'm with you. Be not afraid. Trust in Me. I'm God Almighty. I'm able. Be not afraid. Jesus Christ is my Salvation: Trusting Him, I'm not afraid. Who is he that would condemn me? Of whom shall I be afraid? It is He that doth comfort me: Calls to me, "Be not afraid." It is He, my Lord and Savior. Why should I then be afraid?

December 2016

What is Christmas? by: Judy Reid

Christmas is the birth of Christ Mary’s little son The sweetest babe there ever was Since time had first begun It marked the promise God had made When Eden’s doors were closed. One day a Savior would be sent The time was not disclosed It also is a time for love That seems to fill the air People smile mere easily And try to show they care Those who do not know the Lord Need only look around To see His love at work in us….. We stand on holy ground Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly As in all wisdom you teach and admonish One another, singing psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs with gratitude In your hearts to God. Colossians 3:16

Its not about the Gifts by: Judy Reid

It’s not about the gifts we give or gifts that we receive It’s about the way we live, How deeply we believe There are no frosty snowmen, No reindeer flying high, But the star above Christ manager Still shines brightly in the sky It’s not about tinseled tree, A decorated door; It’s about the joy within us When we worship and adore It’s about the Christmas carols That set our hearts a glow, The hugs we share with loved ones beneath the mistletoe It’s not about Santa and his elves Although these things are nice It’s giving gifts of kindness Not bought at any price It’s about things we share with others, The web of love we weave It’s not about the gifts we give or the gifts that we receive.


December 2016

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Prayers for Baby Kayden --------------------------Kayden goes to his pediatrician every month, to St. Judes affiliate in Johnson City every month, he has a home nurse visit weekly, and has to go to St. Judes in Memphis every 3 months. Although the brain tumor has shrunk, it’s still there. Please continue to pray for Kayden and for God to completely heal him.

Kayden Christopher is receiving his chemo orally and is presently doing good. The latest MRI shows the tumor has shrunk even more. The tumor is still inoperable, and he has lost some of his hearing because of the chemo. Kayden’s website is: Prayers for Baby Kayden

If you wish to send any mail to Kayden or contribute to his fund, he has an account at Enrichment Federal Credit Union He also has a Go Fund Me account. His address is: Kayden Christopher 197 Shady Dr. Harriman, TN 37748

We know God can heal Kayden, and with your prayers, maybe God will intervene and perform more miracles on Baby Kayden.

The Dreaded IRS A little boy wanted $100 badly and prayed for two weeks but nothing happened. Then he decided to write a letter to the Lord requesting the $100. When the local postal authorities received the letter addressed to the Lord, USA, they decided to send it to the IRS. The agent who opened the letter was so impressed, touched, and amused that he sent the little boy a $5.00 bill, thinking this would appear to be a lot of money to a little boy. The little boy was delighted with the $5.00, and sat down to write a thank-you note to the Lord. It said: Dear Lord, Thank you very much for sending me the money. However, I noticed that for some reason you had to send it through the IRS and as usual, those jerks deducted $95.

In a very early draft of Raiders of the Lost Ark, Indiana Jones carried brass knuckles instead of a bullwhip.

A GREAT PLEASURE IN LIFE IS DOING WHAT PEOPLE SAY YOU CANNOT DO. - WALTER BAGEHOT

Nationally Certified as a Consumer Bankruptcy Specialist

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December 2016

What They Did in the Colosseum

Say what you will about violence in American football, but the Coliseum of ancient Rome may have been the single most barbaric sporting venue in human history. Some of the showdowns witnessed there were so ferocious that historians still talk about them today.

Torture was entertainment

One show played out the torture of Prometheus by having a criminal nailed to a cross with his stomach cut open. A bear was then released to finish him off. Another criminal thought he got off easy. Cast as Orpheus taming the beasts, he was sent in with a lyre and ordered to play it for an arena full of animals. These were tame animals that wouldn’t hurt him—at first. Watching a man walk around not getting murdered was too boring for the Roman audiences, so they deviated from the source material a bit. Halfway through the show, a starved bear was sent in to kill Orpheus.

Animals From Every Corner Of The World

The games were the best place to see animals. The first giraffe ever to set foot in Europe was displayed there. It had been captured by Julius Caesar and was dragged into the arena with a chain around its neck. The crowd was impressed by its exoticness but not so much by the animal. Of course, this was Rome, so just showing off animals wasn’t enough. Exotic animals—including elephants, rhinoceroses, hippos, and giraffes—were pitted against one another in combat. Other times, hunters would be set loose to slaughter the animals for the amusement of the crowd. According to one source, Nero managed to get an elephant to walk on a tightrope for the delight of the audience, although we don’t know the technical details of how his people pulled it off. So many animals from so many places were brought in that it created its own ecosystem. At least 684 unique species of plants have been found there, birthed from the droppings of animals from every corner of the globe.

A Free-For-All Animal Slaughter

In AD 281, Emperor Probus had his people plant trees in the Circus Maximus until it looked like a forest. Then he invited the city to the circus for an event that would never be matched. Instead of being stuck sitting in the bleachers, the people were invited to walk into the arena itself. There, a horde of herbivores was let loose. A thousand ostriches, a thousand stags, and a thousand boars were released into the crowd—along with a scattered slew of whatever animals they had on hand. The entire audience was allowed to run wild with the animals, free to hunt them any way they chose—and they could take home whatever they killed.

Women Murdering Each Other

It wasn’t always just men in the arena—women were sent in, too. One show started with a woman dressed as Venus standing before Emperor Titus and declaring, “It is not enough that warrior Mars serves you in unconquered arms, Caesar. Venus herself serves you, too.” This was more than just a ceremony; it was a signal to the audience. Today, they wouldn’t just see men beating each other senseless. They would see women kill each other, too. Titus’s brother, Domitian, was really into the idea. When Domitian took over, he had more women fight than any other emperor. Unlike the men, these women were usually untrained, beating each other or being pitted against dwarfs in savage, desperate battles. The men loved it. “What sense of shame can be found in a woman wearing a helmet,” one Roman wrote, “who shuns femininity and loves brute force!”

Heckler Gets Disemboweled Widely cited as one of Rome’s most ruthless emperors, Domitian’s (51-96 CE) sadism was greatly appeased by the Coliseum, which he endowed with lavish improvements and expanded seating. He approached the games with deadly seriousness, as one unfortunate citizen learned. After the man jeered a favorite gladiator, Domitian had him dragged into the center of the arena and thrown to a gang of ravenous dogs, which swiftly tore him limb from limb. A Live Naval Battle

There are about four confirmed times in history when the Coliseum was filled with water to stage a full-scale naval battle. These were incredible technical displays. Crewed by condemned prisoners, full fleets of ships were put inside and would battle for the amusement of the crowds. The first was staged by Julius Caesar, and it included 4,000 oarsmen and 2,000 fighters aboard full-size ships. It was so popular that people were trampled to death trying to get a good view. That was just a small show, though. They got bigger and bigger until Claudius set the record by having 100 ships and 19,000 soldiers fight in a massive artificial sea. His show almost didn’t happen. At first, the prisoners aboard the ships refused to fight. Claudius sent in his imperial guard to demonstrate exactly what would happen to the prisoners if they didn’t die for the entertainment of his audience. Then the show began.

Happy Birthday

Donald Strange Dec. 11th

GARY’S TIRE

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Daryl Leehaug Dec. 26th

I went to the museum where they had all the heads and arms from the statues that are in all the other museums. -- Steven Wright

The site where the Parthenon was built had to be cleared of hundreds of dinosaur bones (then called giants’ bones) before construction could begin.


December 2016

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A Soldier’s Christmas T'was the night before Christmas, he lived all alone, in a one bedroom house, made of plaster and stone. I had come down the chimney, with presents to give, and to see just who, in this home, did live. I looked all about, a strange sight I did see, no tinsel, no presents, not even a tree. no stocking by mantle, just boots filled with sand, on the wall hung pictures, of far distant lands. With medals and badges, awards of all kinds, a sober thought, came through my mind. for this house was different, it was dark and dreary, I found the home of a soldier, once I could see clearly. The soldier lay sleeping, silent, alone, curled up on the floor, in this one bedroom home. the face was so gentle, the room in disorder, not how I pictured, a true US Soldier. Was this the hero, of whom I'd just read? curled up on a poncho, the floor for a bed? I realized the families, that I saw this night, owed their lives to these soldiers, who were willing to fight. Soon round the world, the children would play, and grownups would celebrate, a bright Christmas day. they all enjoyed freedom, each month of the year, because of the soldiers, like the one lying here. I couldn't help wonder, how many lay alone, on a cold Christmas eve, in a land far from home. the very thought brought, a tear to my eye, I dropped to my knees, and started to cry. The soldier awakened, and I heard a rough voice, "Santa don't cry, this life is my choice; I fight for freedom, I don't ask for more, this is my life, my country, my corps.."

Happy Birthday A.J. Burkhardt

The soldier rolled over, and drifted to sleep, I couldn't control it, I continued to weep. I kept watch for hours, so silent and still, and we both shivered, from the cold night's chill.

Dec. 27th

I did not want to leave, on that cold, dark, night, this guardian of honor, so willing to fight. then the soldier rolled over, with a voice soft and pure, whispered, "carry on Santa, it's Christmas day, all is secure." One look at my watch, and I knew he was right. "Merry Christmas my friend, and to all a good night."

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If I Had Another Shot At Life

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Christmas Trivia

Santa Claus is also known as St. Nickolas, Father Christmas, GrandI would have invited friends over father Frost and Kris Kringle. to dinner even if the carpet was Santa Claus was born in 270 AD. That means he is over 1,000 years stained, or the sofa faded. old. It’s the magic of Christmas that keeps him alive and well. I would have eaten the popcorn According to the poem “A Visit from St. Nicholas” written by in the ‘good’ living room and Clement Moore in 1823 Santa is described as a jolly old elf with worried much less about the dirt cheeks like roses, his nose like a cherry and a little round belly that when someone wanted to light a shook when he laughed like a bowl full of jelly. fire in the fireplace. Santa has a white beard, a red suit with white cuffs, a white collar I would have taken the time to and a black belt. He also wears a red hat with white trim and wears listen to my grandfather ramble black boots. about his youth. It is believed that Santa’s elves work all year long in Santa’s workI would have shared more of shop making toys for children all over the world. the responsibility carried by my Santa Claus is believed to bring gifts to all the good boys and girls husband. I would never have insisted the while they are sleeping on Christmas Eve (December 24th).

car windows be rolled up on a Throughout the year Santa Claus keeps 2 lists of girls and boys, a summer day because my hair had good list and a naughty list. just been teased and sprayed. Children on the naughty list are believed to receive coal for ChristI would have sat on the lawn mas with my grass stains. So how does Santa deliver all those presents in one night? Santa I would have cried and laughed actually has almost two days to deliver the presents. How? While less while watching television in one part of the world it is day, in another part of the world it is and more while watching life. night. For example when it is 12:30PM (daytime) in New York it is I would never have bought 1:30AM (nighttime) in China. Santa will travel through 3 different anything just because it was time zones on Christmas Eve. This gives him more time to deliver practical, wouldn’t show soil, or presents. was guaranteed to last a lifetime. Santa will visit over 90 million homes on Christmas Eve. So to Instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I’d have cherished every moment and realized that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle. When my kids kissed me impetuously, I would never have said, “Later. Now go get washed up for dinner.” There would have been more “I love you’s” and more “I’m sorry’s.” But mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute, look at it and really see it…live it and never give it back. STOP SWEATING THE SMALL STUFF!!! Don’t worry about who doesn’t like you, who has more, or who’s doing what. Instead, let’s cherish the relationships we have with those who do love us.

Happy Birthday

Arlene Daughtery Dec. 25th

deliver all the presents how fast does his sleigh have to go?

Santa’s sleigh travels at the speed of light. That is about 186,282.4 miles per second or 671 million miles per hour! Santa has 8 reindeer Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner and Blitzen. (And, Rudolph, of course)

“AS IS”

“AS IS” seems to mean - not in the best shape. Yet Jesus Loves, - Calls, - and Desires your life "AS IS" He is Willing to Trade your broken heart for a New Transformed Life. Already Paid in full, by His Sacrificial Death, Just accept His Gift for you. Have you heard and believed that you must be a "Good Person" first? Jesus Accepted a thief on the cross, all the thief did was ask. He truly Loves you - Just as you are. ( "AS IS" ) He can make any changes needed. Don't be foolish as to which path to follow. Jesus can be trusted. -- See Acts 2:21 & Romans 10:13 -YOU ARE WELCOMED TO COME JOIN US AT ROCKWOOD VILLAGE (2nd floor) Friday at 7pm JESUS LOVES YOU == "Just as You Are"


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December 2016

THE PHANTOM (Can You Find Me¿)

Santa’s Elves Ever wonder about Santa’s Elves? Who are these helpers to Santa, what do they like to eat, where do they live? For the answers to these questions and more check out these facts about Santa’s elves below! •Santa’s Elves are small magical creatures that help Santa throughout the year. •Elves are also known as Santa’s helpers and Santa’s Magical Elves. •The Elves live in the North Pole with Santa and Mrs. Claus.

Find this place and WIN a years subscription to The Roane Reader Go to www.roanereader.com/thephantom PLEASE PROVIDE YOUR NAME, ADDRESS, EMAIL(optional) and PHONE NUMBER. ANSWERS MUST BE VERY SPECIFIC!! Entries that fail to provide all this information will not qualify!

•Did you know that even though it’s always cold and there is always snow at the North Pole the Elves never get cold! Their elf clothing keep them warm and cozy. •The Elves live in tiny colorful cottage houses throughout the North Pole. •Elves decorate their houses with Christmas lights all year round. They also decorate with candies and gingerbread. •All of Santa’s Elves are under 4ft tall. •They have pointy ears and rosy cheeks. Their hair can be a variety of colors. •Santa’s Elves come from all different ethnic backgrounds to represent all the different children from around the world. •Elves have many jobs at the North Pole. Many of them work in Santa’s workshop making toys, some take care of Santa’s Reindeer and others bake cookies and make candies. There are schools for Elf children so some Elves are teachers. One of the biggest jobs at the North Pole for an elf is working in the mail department. The Elves go through all Santa’s letters from children and make sure that each and every one is read by Santa. On Christmas Eve Santa’s elves also help prepare Santa’s sleigh for his long journey ahead. Some elves are chosen to ride with Santa to deliver presents. •Elves favorite things to eat are cookies and candies. Mrs. Claus looks after the elves to make sure they also eat fruits and vegetables. •Elves make toys throughout the entire year not just during Christmas. Making toys keeps the elves busy throughout the year.

Last Months Winner

•Santa’s Elves live for a very long time. Children’s happiness and belief in the magic of Christmas keeps Elves alive and well. So remember to never loose the spirit of Christmas. •Popular boy elf names are: Jingle, Buddy, Charlie and Popular girl elf names are Nellie, Elfie and Trixie

Merry Christmas from an old Sears Catalog

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Animal Photography Tip for taking photos of you or a pet outside. Outdoor photos are nice because you can take wonderful photos of your pet during playtime. When you are outside, make sure you are in a safe area where your pet will not be around traffic or other distractions and dangers. You probably don’t want a photo of your dog running away from you. When taking photos outdoors, the best times for natural light are the early morning and late afternoon. Morning and evening light will give your photos a warm feeling.

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December 2016

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To the kids who survived the 40's, 50's, 60's & 70's

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Why Do Churches Have

Two Entrance Doors? First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they carried us. In the United States in the late They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing and didn't get tested for 18th and early 19th century this diabetes. custom was common. The men Then after that trauma, our baby cribs were covered with bright entered the right door and sat colored lead-based paints. on the right side of the church, We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and the women entered the left and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets, not to mention, the door and sat on the left side of risks we took hitchhiking. the church. This practice was As children, we would ride in cars with no seat belts or air bags. an imitation of the customary Riding in the back of a pick up on a warm day was always a special sides on which men and women treat. stood when being married and We drank water from the garden hose and not from a bottle. also the similar custom in burial We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and no when the wife was buried on one actually died from this. the husbands left. Sometimes We ate cupcakes, bread and butter and drank soda pop with sugar there were rails running down in it, but we weren't overweight because we were always outside the middle of the church that playing! further kept the younger men We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as and women separate during the we were back when the streetlights came on. worship services. This was an No one was able to reach us all day. And we were o.k. accepted form of modesty that We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and men and women expected of then ride down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After each other. The tradition of two running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem. front doors has continued in We did not have Playstations, Nintendo's, x-boxes, no video games Protestant Church Architecture at all, no 99 channels on cable, no video tape movies, no surround even into the 20th century. sound, no cell phones, no personal computers, no internet or internet Songs for Seniors chat rooms..........we had friends and we went outside and found Some of your old favorites have them! We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were re-released their greatest hits... no lawsuits from these accidents. The Bee Gees - "How Can You We made up games with sticks and tennis balls and ate worms and Mend A Broken Hip" although we were told it would happen, we did not put out very The Temptations - "Papa's Got A many eyes, nor did the worms live in us forever. Kidney Stone" We rode bikes or walked to a friend's house and knocked on the Ringo Starr - "I Get By With A door or rang the bell, or just walked in and talked to them! Little Help From Depends" Little league had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who didn't had to learn to deal with disappointment. Imagine that!! Marvin Gaye - "I Heard It The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard Through The Grape Nuts" of. they actually sided with the law! This generation has produced some of the best risk-takers, problem Procol Harem - "A Whiter Shade Of Hair" solvers and inventors ever! ABBA - "Denture Queen" The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas. Roberta Flack - "The First Time We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned I Ever Forgot Your Face" how to deal with it all! And you are one of them! Congratulations! Please pass this on to Commodores - "Once, Twice, others who have had the luck to grow up as kids, before the lawyers Three Times To The Bathroom" Rolling Stones - "You Can't and the government regulated our lives for our own good. Always Pee When You Want! "

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23 The Roane Reader

An Eleventh Letter to America

by: Manuel Ybarra, Jr The old saying that, “Nero played the fiddle (Violin) while Rome burned” is pretty much what America is doing now. The country has sunk down into perversion so deep that it cannot think straight at all. Our once beloved Democratic Party has turned into the Demon Party. Most of the News Media has turned into defenders and supporters of that party instead of doing the normal job of caring for America and doing what is best for our beloved country. We all say we love America. But First we must love God and follow His Commandments, which God with his Fiery finger etched in stone. Those etched Commandments, God took to Heaven in the Ark of the Covenant. So they try to distract from their ungodliness by other things which are also perversions. To them killing the unborn “is a right.” Supporting abominations such as homosexual behavior and same-sex marriage is fine with them. But disobeying God’s commandments means Hell, and the Lake of Fire will be your eternal home for ever, because judgment will be by The Word of God. Seek God before it is too late for you! Email: mybarrajr77@outlook.com

Great Uses For Rubber Bands Grip Bottle Caps: Twist-off beer and soda caps are difficult for some of us, what with the sharp little crimps digging into our palms and all. The solution for this is simply to wrap the bottle top in a rubber band. This trick also works great for smooth, tough-to-grip bottle tops as well. Grip Drinking Glasses: If you have arthritis, grasping drinking glasses securely, especially when they're wet with condensation, might be difficult. You can grip easier if you simply wrap a couple of rubber bands around the glass. This also works great for kids with slippery hands. Anchor your Cutting Board: If your cutting board tends to slide and move across your countertop whilst you're chopping up veggies, just put a rubber band around each end for traction. Secure Lids: Bakeware dishes come with lids that are great for covering food when it's stationary, such as in the fridge or on the countertop, but not so much when you're transporting a dish in the car or by foot. The next time your casserole dish needs to be mobile, maybe you're giving leftovers to a friend or bringing an entrée to a party, secure the lid to the base with a couple of wide rubber bands. Reshape a Broom: When your broom's bristles have become splayed with use, just wrap a rubber band around the broom a few inches from the bottom, and leave it for a day or so to get the bristles back in line.

Bobby Darin - "Splish, Splash, I Was Havin' A Flash"

Happy Birthday

Missi Lemons Scandlyn Dec. 17th

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10 Things You May Not Know About the Pony Express

December 2016

In April 1860, the famed Pony Express began using horse and rider relay teams to shuttle mail along a 2,000-mile route between St. Joseph, Missouri, and Sacramento, California. While the company only operated for 19 months, it set a new standard for high-speed mail delivery and later became a recurring motif in dime novels, Western films and frontier lore. Below, explore 10 interesting facts about the short-lived mail service that helped transform the American West. The Pony Express was more than twice as fast as its competitors. In the mid-19th century, California-bound mail had to either be taken overland by a 25-day stagecoach or spend months inside a ship during a long sea voyage. The Pony Express, meanwhile, had an average delivery time of just 10 days. To achieve this remarkable speed, company owners William H. Russell, William B. Waddell and Alexander Majors set up a string of nearly 200 relief stations across what is now Missouri, Kansas, Nebraska, Colorado, Wyoming, Utah, Nevada and California. Lone horsemen would ride between stations at breakneck pace, switching mounts every 10-15 miles and then handing their cargo off to a new courier after 75-100 miles. The relay system allowed mail to crisscross the frontier in record time. The company’s personal best came in March 1861, when riders carried Abraham Lincoln’s first inaugural address from Nebraska to California in just seven days, 17 hours. It was a financial flop. Despite its enduring place in Old West legend, the Pony Express never turned a profit during its year and a half history. The company began making deliveries in April 1860, but service ground to a halt just a few weeks later when the Pyramid Lake War erupted between the United States and the Paiute Indians. The temporary shutdown cost the company some $75,000, and it continued to hemorrhage cash over the next few months due to high operations costs and its failure to secure a government mail contract. Though hailed in the press for its efficiency and adventurous spirit, the Pony Express eventually folded in October 1861, having lost as much as $200,000. There was a weight limit for Pony Express riders. Since speed was its main goal, the Pony Express went to great lengths to keep its horses’ loads as light as possible. Rather than burly cowboys, most of the riders were small, wiry men who weighed between 100 and 125 pounds—roughly the same size as a modern horse-racing jockey. Their average age was around 20, but it wasn’t unusual for teenagers as young as 14 to be hired. One man named “Bronco” Charlie Miller claimed he was only 11 years old when he first joined the Pony Express. Riders were required to take a loyalty oath. In exchange for their $100-150 monthly salaries—a substantial sum for the time—Pony Express riders were expected to take a loyalty oath that read: “I do hereby swear, before the Great and Living God, that during my engagement, and while an employee of Russell, Majors and Waddell, I will, under no circumstances, use profane language, that I will drink no intoxicating liquors, that I will not quarrel or fight with any other employee of the firm, and that in every respect I will conduct myself honestly, be faithful to my duties, and so direct all my acts as to win the confidence of my employers, so help me God.” Those who broke the rules risked being dismissed without pay, but it appears that few Pony Express employees followed the pledge to the letter. Liquor flowed freely at relief stations, and an eyewitness named Richard Burton reported that he “scarcely ever saw a sober rider.” Ordinary people almost never used the Pony Express. The speed of the Pony Express didn’t come cheap. In its early days the service cost $5 for every half-ounce of mail—the equivalent of some $130 today. Prices were later reduced to just $1, but they still remained too high for everyday mail. Instead, the service was mainly used to deliver newspaper reports, government dispatches and business documents, most of which were printed on tissue-thin paper to keep costs down. One rider completed a 380-mile run in less than two days. In 1860, Robert “Pony Bob” Haslam took off on the most legendary ride in Pony Express history. The 20-year-old was scheduled to make his usual 75-mile run from Friday’s Station east to Buckland Station in Nevada. Upon arriving at Buckland, however, he found that his relief rider was petrified of the Paiute Indians, who had been attacking stations along the route. When the other man refused to take the mail, Haslam jumped back in the saddle and rode on, eventually completing a 190-mile run before delivering his mochila at Smith’s Creek. After a brief rest, he mounted a fresh horse and retraced his steps all the way back to Friday’s Station, at one point passing a relay outpost that had been burned by the Paiutes. By the time he finally returned to his home station, “Pony Bob” had traveled 380 miles in less than 40 hours—a Pony Express record. Riders didn’t have the deadliest job on the Pony Express. Pony Express riders had to deal with extreme weather conditions, harsh terrain and the threat of attacks by bandits and Indians, but life may have been even more dangerous for the stock keepers who manned the relief stations. Their outposts were usually crude, dirt floor hovels equipped with little more than sleeping quarters and corrals for the horses. Many were located in remote sections of the frontier, making them extremely vulnerable to ambush. Accounts differ, but Indians reportedly attacked or burned several relay stations during the Pyramid Lake War in the summer of 1860, killing as many as 16 stock hands. By contrast, only a handful of riders—six, according to the National Parks Service—died in the line of duty during the entire history of the Pony Express. The transcontinental telegraph dealt the Pony Express its deathblow. For all its financial troubles, the Pony Express didn’t truly collapse until a better alternative appeared on the scene. The company had spent its brief history bridging the gap between the Eastern and Western telegraph lines, but it was finally rendered obsolete on October 24, 1861, when Western Union completed the transcontinental telegraph system at Salt Lake City. The Pony Express ceased service just two days later. Despite operating for only 19 months, its riders had successfully delivered some 35,000 pieces of mail and traveled more than half a million miles across the American frontier.

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December 2016

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Death by Drug Overdoses Are At An All Time High

The number of Tennesseans dying from drug overdoses continues to increase, with a record number of deaths recorded in 2015. The Tennessee Department of Health (TDH) says that 1,451 people died from drug overdoses in the state in 2015--the most ever. The death rate from drug overdoses was higher than those killed in car accidents on Tennessee roads. In the past five years, more than 6,000 lives were lost to this growing epidemic. “This is a disease every one of us is vulnerable to, not a moral failing. Not one of these victims deserved this, and the tragedy of lives lost to overdoses becomes even more painful knowing these deaths can be prevented and are the horrible tip of the overdose iceberg,” said TDH Commissioner John Dreyzehner. “We've made progress in reducing the amount of powerful narcotics legally dispensed and in making the overdose antidote naloxone more readily available, but there are still many people battling substance use disorders without seeking professional help and many criminals willing to sell extremely dangerous pills, counterfeit pills and gray and illegal substances." Knox County had 153 drug overdose deaths last year, third highest in the state, behind Shelby and Davidson counties. “The problem of prescription drug abuse should trouble anyone who cares about the future of our state,” said Mark Gwyn, director of the Tennessee Bureau of Investigation. “Those who are addicted often put themselves in even more danger by buying pills from dealers on the street, without knowing for sure what they contain. Some of those pills are counterfeit, full of dangerous substances like fentanyl, which has certainly contributed to the recent increase in overdose deaths in Tennessee. It can’t be said strongly enough: Turning to the streets to find your next fix isn’t the answer, and it might very well cost you your life.” A drug called Naloxone, when administered quickly and correctly, has been proven to stop opioid overdoses. Authorized pharmacists can dispense naloxone to people at risk of overdoses, or their family. In addition, many police officers and first responders across the state are now carrying naloxone to administer to people who are overdosing. Drug overdose deaths by county (does not include counties with fewer than 12): There were eight counties where no drug overdose deaths were documented: Haywood, Lake, Lauderdale, Perry, Pickett, Trousdale and Van Buren. Abuse and misuse of opioids continues to be a significant factor in Tennessee’s crisis of drug overdose deaths. TDH data show nearly 72 percent of the 1,451 drug overdose deaths in Tennessee in 2015 involved opioids. Among the overdose deaths involving opioids, the vast majority were unintentional. Anderson Blount Bradley Campbell Carter Cheatham Claiborne Coffee

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Celebrate Recovery! Every Tuesday Celebrate Recovery meets at 6 pm at Kingston First Baptist Church. It's a faith based program for anyone with a hurt, habit, or a hang-up.

Everyone is welcome!

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What Denomination?

A woman went into a post office to buy some stamps for her Christmas cards. “What denomination do you want?” asked the lady at the counter. ‘Good Grief’ she replied, Has it come to this? I suppose you’d better give me twenty Catholic and twenty Presbyterian.

When people are free to do as they please, they usually imitate each other. Eric Hoffer

Happy Birthday

Kay Christopher Dec. 31st

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25 The Roane Reader

Christmas facts

Do you know why we say the Twelve Days of Christmas? It is believed that it took the 3 kings 12 days to find baby Jesus. The song Jingle Bells was written by James Pierpont in 1857. It was originally called “One Horse Open Sleigh” and was made for Thanksgiving. Many years ago in England a traditional Christmas dinner included a pig head served with mustard. The tradition of naughty children getting a lump of coal in their stocking comes from Italy. Did you know that tinsel was once made of real silver! It was invented in Germany in 1610. There are two islands named Christmas. Christmas Island (formerly Kiritimati) in the Pacific Ocean and Christmas Island in the Indian Ocean. The tallest Christmas tree ever displayed was in Seattle Washington in 1950. The Christmas tree was 221 feet tall! It is said that candy canes were invented by a candy maker in Indiana. He wanted to use them to spread the name Jesus around the world. Santa Claus is also known as St. Nicholas, Father Christmas, Grandfather Frost and Kris Kringle. Santa is believed to bring gifts to good girls and boys on the night before Christmas (December 24th). There are 3 towns in the US that are named Santa Claus. One in Georgia, one in Arizona and one in Indiana. Santa Claus 8 eight reindeer are named: Comet, Cupid, Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Donder and Blitzen.

Pleading for Help A man visited the pastor, a woman well known for her charitable impulses. “Pastor, ” he said in a broken voice, “I wish to draw your attention to the terrible plight of a poor family in this neighborhood. The father is dead, the mother is too ill to work, and the nine children are starving. They are about to be turned into the cold, empty streets unless someone pays their rent, which amounts to $900.” “How terrible!” exclaimed the preacher’s wife. “May I ask who you are?” The sympathetic visitor applied his handkerchief to his eyes. “I’m the landlord,” he sobbed.

If you left the Church to get away from hypocritical people. you should also quit your job. drop out of school. disconnect yourself from all of your friends and family, lock yourself in your room while you're at it. There will be flaws wherever there are humans. We need to start seeing church for what it is: it is a hospital with wounded and hurt people. You will find messed up, conniving, calculating, imperfect individuals. including yourself. As much us you want to deny it. we all go for healing. So if you felt betrayed by a fellow Church member, put your Nursing cap on. and think of them as your patients. Treat them with care, love and kindness despite their rudeness.


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Children's Christmas Carols A teacher in Atlanta asked her students to write the words to their favorite Christmas Carols. She probably got fired for mentioning Christmas in school. Anyway here are some of the humorous lines she received: •Deck the Halls with Buddy Holly •We three kings of porridge and tar •On the first day of Christmas my tulip gave to me •Later on we'll perspire, as we dream by the fire. •He's makin a list, chicken and rice. •Noel. Noel, Barney's the king of Israel. •With the jelly toast proclaim •Olive, the other reindeer. (all of the other reindeer) •Frosty the Snowman is a ferret elf, I say •Sleep in heavenly peas •In the meadow we can build a snowman, Then pretend that he is sparse and brown •You'll go down in listerine •Oh, what fun it is to ride with one horse, soap and hay •O come, froggy faithful •You'll tell Carol, "Be a skunk, I require"

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Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer Rudolph is considered Santa’s 9th reindeer. Rudolph was added to Santa’s reindeer team on one Christmas Eve during a bad snowstorm. Santa’s 8 reindeer could not see to fly through the storm. Rudolph with his glowing red nose lit the way for Santa’s sleigh. Did you know that before Rudolph lead the way for Santa’s sleigh he was made fun of by the other reindeer for being different? Rudolph was the only reindeer with the glowing nose. So do all reindeer fly? No, in fact only Santa’s reindeer fly. Santa uses his Christmas Magic to make his reindeer fly. Many children leave out milk and cookies or other treats for Santa on Christmas Eve because he gets hungry on his long journey of delivering presents but, did you know his reindeer get hungry too? So what does Santa do when Christmas is over? First he takes a short vacation with Mrs. Claus at the North Pole then he gets right back to work. Preparing his good boys and girls list and his naughty girls and boys list. He also starts getting toys ready for next Christmas. So remember to always be good because you never know when Santa’s watching.

Mid-East Community Action Agency

Roane and Loudon Counties Early Head Start/Head Start/PreK Mid-East Head Start is taking Childrens' Applications for the 2015/2016 Program Year Head Start is an early childhood federal program that promotes the school readiness of children ages birth to five from income eligible families by enhancing their cognitive, social, and emotional development. We also serve pregnant women and their families

To complete an application or to get information please call the Head Start Admin Center in Kingston at 865-376-2308 ext 222 Monday -Thursday Site Admin Office Rolling Acres Fairmont

Phone 865-376-2308 865-882-0808 865-882-8737

P.O. Box 790 Mid-East Kingston, TN 37763 Community Action Agency www.mecaa.net

Mid-East Community Action Agency does not discriminate on the basis of national origin, sex, disability or age in its programs, activities or employment.

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December 2016

Water Filter Science Project for Kids What are Water Filters and What do they do? Water filters are used to remove impurities and solid particles from our water. They make our drinking water clean. Follow the steps below to make your own home made water filter. Materials needed: Pitcher of Water half full, Glass Jar, Coffee Filter, Cup of Soil/Dirt and a Funnel ( I cut off the top part of a soda bottle and turned it upside down to make funnel) Procedure: Step 1: Have child collect a cup of soil or dirt. Step 2: Place the funnel in the glass jar and place the coffee filter in the funnel Step 3: Mix the soil with the water together in a cup Step 4: Slowly pour mixture into funnel, wait until water drains to add more Step 5: Watch what happens! What Happened? The water then flows into the jar and will appear much cleaner. How did this happen? The coffee filter acts like a water filter and catches the soil/dirt particles and separates them from the water. The clean water drips down into the jar. You did it, you made your own home made water filter! Now enter it in your school Science Fair!

Did you know that if you write a letter to Santa and address it to the Santa’s Workshop at the North Pole and bring it to the post office Santa’s Christmas Magic will pick it up and get it to him.

Hey Kids!

Do you have a poem or short story you’ve written?

Send it to us at 1134 Georgia St. Harriman, TN 37748 and we’ll print it!

Public Stargazing Tamke-Allan Observatory, Harriman

Every 1st & 3rd Saturday all year long. Public is welcome! The Tamke-Allan Observatory is located on Caney Creek Road - turn left onto Keller Road (near the TWRA boat launch area) and the road to the observatory is on the left. Amateur astronomers come to Tamke-Allan Observatory the 1st & 3rd Saturday of each month all year long, inviting the public to join them to observe the stars.

Gates open at 7 pm

For more info: www.roanestate.edu/obs or contact David Fields at 865-927-5155 or fieldsde@roanestate.edu for details.


December 2016

Phone: 865-882-9340

Senior personal ads seen in Florida newspapers

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Santa Claus

Foxy Lady: Sexy, fashion-conscious blue-haired beauty, 80's, slim, is a woman! 5'4" (used to be 5'6"), searching for sharp-looking, sharp-dressing Santa Claus is a woman because: companion. Matching white shoes and belt a plus. The vast majorities of men don’t Long-term Commitment: Recent widow who has just buried fourth even think about selecting gifts husband, and am looking for someone to round out a six-unit plot. until Christmas Eve and only go Dizziness, fainting, shortness of breath not a problem. for a last-minute shopping spree. Serenity Now: I am into solitude, long walks, sunrises, the ocean, A man would inevitably get lost yoga and meditation. If you are the silent type, let's get together, up there in the snow and clouds take our hearing aids out and enjoy quiet times. and then refuse to stop and ask Winning Smile: Active grandmother with original teeth seeking a for directions. dedicated flosser to share rare steaks, corn on the cob and caramel Men can’t pack a bag. candy. Men would rather be dead than Beatles or Stones? I still like to rock, still like to cruise in my Camaro be caught wearing red velvet. on Saturday nights and still like to play the guitar. If you were a Men would feel their masculinity groovy chick, or are now a groovy hen, let's get together and listen to is threatened…having to be seen my eight-track tapes. with all those elves. Memories: I can usually remember Monday through Thursday. If Men don’t answer their mail. you can remember Friday, Saturday and Sunday, let's put our two Men aren’t interested in stockheads together. ings unless somebody’s wearing Mint Condition: Male, 1932, high mileage, good condition, some them. hair, many new parts including hip, knee, cornea, valves. Isn't in Finally, being responsible for running condition, but walks well. Christmas would require a commitment. All I Needed to Know About Life I learned from Santa Encourage people to believe in you. Always remember who’s naughty and who’s nice. Don’t pout. It’s as much fun to give as it is to receive. Some days it’s ok to feel a little chubby. Make your presents known. Always ask for a little bit more than what you really want. Bright red can make anyone look good. Wear a wide belt and no-one will notice how many pounds you’ve gained. If you only show up once a year, everyone will think you’re very important. Whenever you’re at a loss for words, say: “HO, HO, HO!”

Caroline Downen Dec. 25th

It Runs in the Family

An 80 year old man went to the doctor for a checkup, and the doctor was amazed at what good shape the guy was in. The doctor asked, "To what do you attribute your good health?" The old timer said, "I'm a golfer and that's why I'm in such good shape. I'm up well before daylight & out golfing up and down the fairways. The doctor said, "Well, I'm sure that helps, but there's got to be more to it. How old was your dad when he died? The old timer said, "Who said my dad's dead? The doctor said, "You mean you're 80 years old and your dad's still alive? How old is he?" The old timer said, "He's 100 yrs old and, in fact, he golfed with me this morning ... and that's why he's still alive ... he's a golfer." The doctor said, "Well, that's great, but I'm sure there's more to it. How about your dad's dad? How old was he when he died?" The old timer said, "Who said my grandpa's dead?" The doctor said, "You mean you're 80 years old and your grand-father's still living! How old is he?" The old timer said, "He's 118 years old." The doctor was getting frustrated at this point and said, "I guess he went golfing with you this morning too?" The old timer said, "No ... Grandpa couldn't go this morning because he got married." The doctor said in amazement, "Got married! Why would a 118-year-old guy want to get married?" The old timer said, "Who said he wanted to?" Why do doctors leave the room when you change? They're going to see you without your clothes on anyway.

Outreach Program Walnut Hill Church's mission is reaching the lost and helping people in need.

The Outreach program needs items donated to make them available to needy people in our area.

Did You Know That...

Clothing - all sizes Shoes Socks Shampoo Soap

Tooth brushes Toothpaste Underclothes ĂďLJŝĂƉĞƌƐ and other items

Stamps & Cards School Supplies Back Packs Clothes Hangers ĂƐŚĚŽŶĂƟŽŶ

ƌŽƉKīdŝŵĞƐͲtĞĚŶĞƐĚĂLJ͗ϭϮ͗ϬϬĂŵƚŽϯ͗ϬϬƉŵ ΘdŚƵƌƐĚĂLJƐͲϵ͗ϬϬĂŵƚŽϯ͗ϬϬƉŵ The people who get the items will be screened and records will be kept to assure the program is used in the right way.

NEED TO INCREASE YOUR SALES? Distributed into 4 counties and the World Wide Web @ www.roanereader.com

27 The Roane Reader

Happy Birthday

The city of Seoul has been the capital city of Korea for more than 600 years Romans used to believe that walnuts could cure head ailments during the Renaissance, since their shape was similar to that of a brain There are coffee flavored PEZ Half of the 42 U.S. Presidents are of Irish descent The General Lee cars used in the popular show The Dukes of Hazards were 1969 Dodge Chargers Sports Illustrated has the largest sports magazine circulation

Advertise with The Roane Reader

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BILLY GRIGSBY, OWNER 354-9957 354-9290

DAMAGE FREE HAULING

1348 GATEWAY - ROCKWOOD

Please pray for the Outreach program. /ĨLJŽƵΖĚůŝŬĞƚŽǀŽůƵŶƚĞĞƌ͕ƉůĞĂƐĞĐŽŶƚĂĐƚƚŚĞKƵƚƌĞĂĐŚůĞĂĚĞƌ͘ tĞŶĞĞĚƚŽŚĂǀĞĂƉŽƐŝƟǀĞĂƫƚƵĚĞĂďŽƵƚƚŚĞƉƌŽŐƌĂŵĨŽƌŝƚƚŽǁŽƌŬ͘ Let God lead us in everything we do.

visit www.csstrong.org for more info

dŽĚŽŶĂƚĞŽƌĨŽƌŵŽƌĞŝŶĨŽƌŵĂƟŽŶ͕ĐŽŶƚĂĐƚ&ĂLJĞĂŶŝĞůƐ͕ Outreach Leader at 865-590-7192 or 865-308-9283.


28 The Roane Reader

Phone: 865-882-9340

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“Little River” - Chapter 11 by: Rachel Holbrook

“Well, look who’s here!” Josiah Jackson called out from his seat on his father’s porch swing. Abigail pressed her sweaty palms against her blue jeans, and called back, “Where is everybody?” Josiah spit a stream of dark liquid into an empty Mountain Dew bottle before answering, “Dad’s out back cleaning fish, Mama’s gone to the grocery store, and Carter’s in the crapper.” Abigail rolled her eyes. “I need to talk to the two of you. You and Carter, I mean.” “Talk to me about what?” The screen door of the house opened and then banged shut, as Abigail and Josiah’s younger brother joined them on the porch. Without waiting for the answer to his first question, he asked, “Where’s the young’ns?” “They’re at home with their daddy,” Abigail answered. “He doesn’t know I’m here.” “Uh oh.” Josiah grinned, showing a row of crooked teeth on the bottom, in stark contrast to the perfectly straight teeth on top. He had flecks of Skoal stuck in them. “What’s he done? You ain’t leavin’ him are you?” “No, I’m not leaving him.” Abigail was already irritated with her brothers. It usually took longer than five minutes for them to get her going, but she was well on her way. “And I’m not in the mood for jokes. This is serious.” Carter sat down on the other end of the porch swing, and Josiah spat into his bottle again. Abigail sighed, and sat across from them in an old rocking chair. It had been on her parents’ front porch since she still lived at home. She ran her hands across the arms of the chair. They were worn smooth. While Abigail collected her thoughts, she studied a spider web attached to the porch posts. Her brothers sat on the swing, pushing it slightly with their mud-encrusted work boots. At twenty-seven and twenty-five years old, her brothers had both moved out, but they spent most of their waking hours at their parent’s home, working the family farm with their dad. Josiah was long and lean like their dad, but he had his mother’s red hair. Carter was short and stocky like his mother’s family, but had his dad’s brown hair. They didn’t look alike, but their attitudes and mannerisms were identical. “Well, spit it out,” Carter prompted his sister. Abigail sighed. “I have a problem, and I need you guys to take care of it for me.” “I never hit a preacher before.” Josiah laughed, and winked at his brother. “I’ve wanted to a time or two, though,” Carter replied. “Shut up.” Abigail snapped at them. “I told you I wasn’t in the mood for jokes. And this isn’t about Jonathan.” She paused and then added, “Well, not really.” Josiah’s eyes narrowed as he watched his sister. He hooked his index finger in his mouth, raked a wet lump of tobacco out of his bottom lip, and flung it into the yard. A chicken quickly ran to examine it. Abigail’s stomach turned at the sight. “What’s wrong?” Josiah’s voice had changed, losing the jovial quality it almost always had. Abigail took a deep breath, and said, “Somebody’s hurt your niece.” The movement of the swing stopped as both men leaned forward. “Who did?” Carter demanded. Abigail recounted the story to them. As soon as she finished explaining what happened, Josiah quietly asked, “And what’s her daddy going to about it?” “That’s why I’m here.” Abigail lifted her chin. “Jonathan doesn’t want to go to the police. He just wants to go talk to the Bates’ and tell them Nathan has to stay away from us and the church or we will call the police.” Carter snorted in derision, and Josiah asked, “That asshole touched his daughter and he’s just going to let him get away with it?” Abigail’s shoulders slumped as she said, “It looks like it. He’s torn. He wants him to be punished, but he doesn’t want people spreading rumors about Emma.” “Torn, my ass!” Josiah’s fists were balled on his thighs. “What do you want us to do, Abby?” “I want you to take care of it for me.” Abigail’s voice was steady for the first time since she arrived. “Make sure he regrets ever laying eyes on my daughter, and make sure no one in Little River ever lays eyes on him again.”

email: info@roanereader.com

December 2016

“Mama?” Jacob poked his head into the family room where Abigail was sewing a patch on Luke’s Boy Scout uniform. Abigail looked up at her youngest son and smiled. “Yes?” “Daddy wants you.” The little boy grinned. “What?” Abigail prompted him. “What what?” Jacob’s grin broadened. “What are you grinning about?” Abigail cocked her head to the side. “What do you want?” “Can I have an ice cream sandwich?” Jacob’s hopeful eyes sparkled. “I knew you wanted something!” Abigail grabbed her son and tickled him. “Stop!” he squealed. “You can have an ice cream if you pay for it.” “Mama!” Jacob protested. Abigail offered her cheek, and said, “Pay up, or no ice cream.” “Fine!” Jacob giggled, and kissed his mother on the cheek. “Now can I have one?” “Sure.” Abigail smacked his skinny butt, and headed down the hall toward her bedroom to find her husband. When she walked in the room, Jonathan was sitting in his desk chair, facing away from the desk. His phone was rested on his thigh. “Jacob said you wanted me.” Abigail sat on the edge of their bed. “Kevin Bates just called me.” Jonathan’s voice was strained. “What did he have to say?” “Apparently, Nathan Bates was attacked last night.” “Good.” “Abby!” Jonathan heaved a deep, shuddering sigh. He raked his hand through his hair. “Well, what did he say?” “He said Nathan was jogging along the highway down past their house and two guys jumped him from behind and drug him into the woods. Beat him up pretty bad.” “Sounds like Karma.” “Really, Abigail? Karma?” “Fine.” She shrugged. “The wrath of God, then.” Jonathan looked at his wife for a moment, then sighed, and said in a soft voice, “Maybe.” “He know who did it?” “No.” Jonathan shook his head. “He’s not said much. They broke his jaw. It’s wired shut. He wrote a statement for the police. Kevin said he told them he got jumped from behind, they put a bag over his head, and beat the crap out of him with something. Maybe a baseball bat.” “That’s all he said?” Abigail prodded. Jonathan nodded. “Kevin said it was weird. He acted like there was stuff he just wasn’t saying. Kevin did say as soon as Nathan gets released from the hospital he wants to go back to Chicago where their parents are.” He lifted his eyes to Abigail’s, and said, “So I guess that solves our problem.” Abigail nodded. “Yeah. I guess it does.”

“Little River” is an ongoing serial which debuted on 6-30-15. New installments will be published every month in The Roane Reader. If you enjoy this serial you can purchase “Little River” Vol. 1 from Amazon in paperback or as a Kindle book for easy reading on your e-reader devices. Rachel Holbrook writes from her home in East Tennessee, where she lives with her husband and six children. She is currently seeking representation for her first novel.


December 2016

Phone: 865-882-9340

The Twelve Cats of Christmas

On the first day of Christmas when I brought home my tree My 12 cats were laughing at me. On the second day of Christmas I saw beneath my tree 2 mangled garlands and my 12 cats laughing at me. On the third day of Christmas I saw beneath my tree 3 Missing Wise Men 2 mangled garlands and my 12 cats laughing at me. On the fourth day of Christmas I saw beneath my tree 4 males a-spraying, 3 missing Wise Men 2 mangled garlands and my 12 cats laughing at me. On the fifth day of Christmas I saw beneath my tree 5 shredded gifts, 4 males a-spraying 3 missing Wise Men, 2 mangled garlands and my 12 cats laughing at me. On the sixth day of Christmas I saw beneath my tree 6 fallen angels, 5 shredded gifts, 4 males a-spraying 3 missing Wise Men 2 mangled garlands and my 12 cats laughing at me. On the seventh day of Christmas I saw beneath my tree 7 half dead rodents, 6 fallen angels, 5 shredded gifts 4 males a-spraying, 3 missing Wise Men 2 mangled garlands and my 12 cats laughing at me. On the eighth day of Christmas I saw beneath my tree 8 shattered ornaments, 7 half dead rodents 6 fallen angels, 5 shredded gifts 4 males a-spraying, 3 missing Wise Men 2 mangled garlands and my 12 cats laughing at me. On the ninth day of Christmas I saw beneath my tree 9 chewed through light strings, 8 shattered ornaments 7 half dead rodents, 6 fallen angels, 5 shredded gifts 4 males a-spraying, 3 missing Wise Men 2 mangled garlands and my 12 cats laughing at me. On the tenth day of Christmas I saw beneath my tree 10 tinsel hairballs, 9 chewed through light strings 8 shattered ornaments, 7 half dead rodents 6 fallen angels, 5 shredded gifts, 4 males a-spraying 3 missing Wise Men, 2 mangled garlands and my 12 cats laughing at me. On the eleventh day of Christmas I saw beneath my tree 11 broken branches, 10 tinsel hairballs, 9 chewed through light strings, 8 shattered ornaments 7 half dead rodents, 6 fallen angels, 5 shredded gifts 4 males a-spraying, 3 missing Wise Men 2 mangled garlands and my 12 cats laughing at me. On the twelfth day of Christmas I looked at my poor tree 12 cats a-climbing, 11 broken branches, 10 tinsel hairballs 9 chewed through light strings, 8 shattered ornaments 7 half dead rodents, 6 fallen angels, 5 shredded gifts 4 males a-spraying, 3 missing Wise Men 2 mangled garlands and my 12 cats laughing at me.

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Pet’s Page

A Dog's Christmas Promises

Christmas is for humans, and I will not ruin the surprises by opening all their presents. Christmas light bulbs, Christmas ornaments, Christmas stockings, and tinsel from the Christmas tree are not food. I will not demolish the Christmas tree and drag the string of lights out into the backyard through the doggy door. I will not dive into the Christmas tree to get the candy canes (which I will eat -- paper and all).

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29 The Roane Reader

Christmas Dog

Tonight's my first night as a watchdog, And here it is Christmas Eve. The children are sleeping all cozy upstairs, While I'm guardin' the stockin's and tree. What's that now---footsteps on the rooftop? Could it be a cat or a mouse? Who's this down the chimney? A thief with a beard--- And a big sack for robbin' the house? I'm barkin', I'm growlin', I'm bitin' his butt. He howls and jumps back in his sleigh. I scare his strange horses, they leap in the air. I've frightened the whole bunch away. Now the house is all peaceful and quiet again. The stockin's are safe as can be. Won't the kiddies be glad when they wake up tomorrow And see how I've guarded the tree. Shel Silverstein

Top 11 Dog & Cat Characteristics

I will not eat my Christmas 11. Dogs come when you call them. doggie treats until after they're Cats take a message and get back to you. out of the stocking! 10. Dogs look much better at the end of a leash. I will not even THINK about 9. Dogs will let you give them a bath without taking out a contract going underneath the Christmas on your life. tree and piddling on the dining 8. Dogs will bark to wake you up if the house is on fire. Cats will quietly sneak out the back door. room rug. I will not get tangled up in the 7. Dogs will bring you your slippers or the evening newspaper. Christmas tree lights and pull the Cats might bring you a dead mouse. tree down while trying to get at 6. Dogs will play Frisbee with you all afternoon. a cat through the conservatory Cats will take a three-hour nap. 5. Dogs will sit on the car seat next to you. window. Cats have to have their own private box or they will not go at all. I will not pee on Grandma's 4. Dogs will greet you and lick your face when you come home from Christmas presents that are under work. her tree as soon as we enter her Cats will be mad that you went to work at all. house. 3. Dogs will sit, lie down, and heel on command. I will not steal the neighbor's Cats will smirk and walk away. Christmas light bulbs. 2. Dogs will tilt their heads and listen whenever you talk. The bowl underneath the Christ- Cats will yawn and close their eyes. mas tree is not a dog dish. I will 1. Dogs will give you unconditional love forever. not drink from it. It will make Cats will make you pay for every mistake you've ever made since me sick. the day you were born.

ROANE COUNTY PAWS

Our mission is to improve the welfare of animals in Roane County We issue vouchers each month to Planned Pethood. We are working with Mark Neely at the Rockwood City Animal Shelter in his established pet food pantry. We educate others about the importance of spaying and neutering, vaccinating, caring for, and properly vetting pets. We are a 501(c)(3) not for profit organization. We rely on the donations of our community members to fund our vouchers and assist with pet care needs. Each dollar donated goes directly toward the care of pets in our area.

Please consider making a donation to Roane County Paws Checks can be mailed to 119 Arrowood Lane, Harriman, TN 37748 For more information, contact Cindy Hickey at 865-607-2865


30 The Roane Reader

Phone: 865-882-9340

www.roanereader.com

email: info@roanereader.com

December 2016

1134 Georgia St. Harriman, Tn 37748 Serving 4 counties with 7,500 issues distributed monthly

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December 2016

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Address 1000 Ladd Landing Kingston, Tn 37763 413 Devonia St, Harriman, Tn 37748 1226 S Roane St, Harriman, Tn 37748 103 First St. Kingston, Tn 37763

B & M Wrecker Service

1348 Gateway Rockwood, Tn 37854

Big Emory Church Benchmark Church Carriage Hill Insurance CB Man

1607 Webster Rd. Harriman, Tn 37748 961 E. Tri-County Blvd. Oliver Springs, Tn 37840 2305 N. Gateway Ave., Ste. 8, Rockwood, Tn 37854 www.truckers-more-cb-radio-range.com 215 N. Kentucky St. Kingston, Tn 37763 - First Baptist 229 Carter Ave. Harriman, Tn 37748 - West Care 101 Roane St. Harriman, Tn 37748 2104 S. Congress Parkway 230 South Roane St. Harriman, Tn 37748

Celebrate Recovery Christmas Lumber Co. Clayton Homes (Athens) Cochran's Tax and Bookkeeping Coldwell Banker Cheryl Laxton Coldwell Banker Glenda Johnson Coldwell Banker Sherry Tipton Credit Central Eagle Mart Eddies Body Shop Ellis Surplus & Salvage Fraker Funeral Home Gadget's Hobby Shop Gary's Pest Control Grants Tree Service Grasscutters G & S Construction Guinnbilt Portable Buildings

410 N. Kentucky St. Kingston, Tn 37763 410 N. Kentucky St. Kingston, Tn 37763 10815 Kingston Pike Knoxville, Tn 37934 705 South Roane St. Harriman, Tn 37748 909 Georgia St Harriman, Tn 37748 514 Emory St. Harriman, Tn 37748 1238 S. Roane St. Harriman, Tn 37748 1445 Kingston Hwy, Kingston, Tn 37763 204 Trenton St. Harriman, Tn 37748 P.O. Box 1026 Harriman, Tn 37748 160 Country Club Dr. Rockwood, TN, 37854 2641 Sugar Grove Valley Rd Harriman, TN 37748 Harriman Area

Happy Paws Harriman Home Center Health Markets Insurance Agency Matthew Libby Hugh Russell Motors, LLC Hwy 29-A Motors Inc Integrity Auto Sales Jamestowne Assisted Living Jerrys Used Furniture Jim Rummell Collectibles

707 Old Roane St. Harriman, Tn 37748

Phone (865) 617-5998 (865) 376-4589 (865) 590-7453 (865) 590-7429 (865) 376-4484 (865) 354-9957 (865) 354-9290 (865) 285-1390 (865) 384-3711 (865) 394-1356 (865) 394-1358 (865) 882-2362 (423) 745-4752 (865) 882-8556 (865) 376-2121 (865) 740-2440 (865) 376-2121 (865) 591-6900 (865) 966-1111 (865) 622-1213 (865) 882-1324 (865) 882-6265 (865) 882-6474 (865) 387-3572 (865) 717-7727 (865) 882-7528 (865) 882-5794 (865) 399-7247 (865) 250-3656 (865) 389-6913 (865) 882-5309 (865) 804-4400 (865) 310-4677 (865) 224-9640 (865) 882-3931

806 Gallaher Rd. Kingston, Tn 37763

(865) 414-8257

1007 Ruritan Rd. Harriman, Tn 37763 1403 Ruritan Rd Harriman, Tn 37748 2645 Harriman Hwy. Harriman, Tn 37748 851 Lawnville Rd Kingston, Tn 37763 2744 Roane State Hwy. Harriman, Tn 37748

(865) 882-1165 (865) 882-6462 (865) 285-9246 (865) 376-3030 (865) 882-3603 (865) 224-0431 (865) 234-7100 (865) 250-2710 (865) 223-3090 (865) 354-2802

J. Neal Jewelry

416 N. Roane St. Harriman, Tn 37748

Joes Mowing Junior's Restaurant KARM Stores Kingston Express Lube Kingston Parks & Recreation Kittrell's Kitchen KTB Taxes Logs to Lumber

214 W. Rockwood St. Rockwood, Tn 37854 1496 N. Gateway Ave Rockwood, Tn 37854 306 Kentucky St., Kingston, Tn 37763 www.kingstonparks.com 1190 Gallaher Rd. Kingston, Tn 37763 111 South 3rd St. Kingston, Tn 37763 150 Columbus Dr. Lenoir City, Tn 37771

L & J Home Repair

148 Hensley Rd. Kingston, Tn 37763

Mary Kay - Sherry Tipton

(865) 717-8288 (865) 376-1356 (865) 376-3060 (865) 376-0122 (865) 986-4264 (865) 466-2735 (865) 223-3090 (865) 622-1213

Mid-East Community Action Agency P.O. Box 790 Kingston, Tn 37763

(865) 376-2308

Midtown Florist & Gifts

(865) 882-3603

2744 Roane State Hwy. Harriman, Tn 37748

Mostoller, Stulberg, Whitfield & Allen 136 S. Illinois Ave., Sute 104 Oak Ridge, Tn 37830 Law Firm (Social Security Disability) Patti Savage Designs Princess Theatre Quality Home Health Radio 580-AM Realty Executives Brenda Chapman Renos Sporting Goods

715 N. Kentucky St. Kingston, TN 37763 421 N. Roane St. Harriman, Tn 37748

Roane County Paws

119 Arrowood Ln., Harriman, Tn 37748

Roane County Trustee Roane Reader

P.O. Box 296 Kingston, Tn 37763 501 Evergreen St. Harriman, Tn 37748

319 West Rockwood St. Rockwood, Tn 37854

(865) 789-2706 (865) 882-4633 (423) 346-3302 (865) 250-6718

3232 Tazewell Pike Knoxville, Tn 37918

(865) 688-3232

430 N. Roane St Harriman, Tn 37748

(865) 882-2450 (865) 250-6966 (865) 607-2865

Robert James & Associates

615 River Road Kingston, Tn 37763

Rockwood Village Apartments Rosemary's Florist S.L. Bowman & Sons

601 S. Chamberlain Ave. Rockwood, Tn 37854 103 First St. Kingston, Tn 37763 521 N. Front St. Rockwood, Tn 37854

Seal Coat Specialist

Harriman Area

Senator Ken Yager Sextons Automotive Group Shelton Financial Protection Shepherd Plumbing Spotted Spaniel State Farm - Bill McFarland Taxes Done Right

6 Legislative Plaza Nashville,Tn 37243 269 S. Roane St. Harriman, Tn 37748 166 Marney Cove Rd. Kingston,Tn 37763 Roane County Area 235 Jackson Square Oak Ridge, Tn 37830 119 North Gateway Avenue 1251 South Roane St. Harriman, Tn 37748

Tellico Propane

1375 Monterey Road Loudon, TN 37774

Traughber Insurance & Financial Svcs, Inc. U.S. Coast Guard Auxiliary Victorian Square Assisted Living Walnut Hill Outreach Program Your Time Clock & Watch Repair

(865) 482-4466

(865) 882-9340 (865) 376-4925 (800) 530-5700 (865) 354-3945 (865) 376-4484 (865) 354-0600 (864) 640-1654 (865) 223-3976 (615) 741-1449 (865) 882-2416 (865) 376-0321 (865) 354-8518 (865) 483-0961 (865) 354-9453 (865) 465-5575 (865) 408-9050 (888) 294-9234

420 Ruritan Rd Harriman, Tn 37748

(865) 882-1900

1220 Bowman Bend Rd. Harriman, Tn 37748 241 S. Chamberlain Avenue Rockwood, Tn 37854

(865) 376-4822 (865) 354-1133 (865) 590-7192 (865) 466-5805

31 The Roane Reader

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Name Anytime Fitness Big E Quick Mart Big Johns Bob's Hamburgers Cochran's Tax Service Coin Laundry (Harriman) Dollar General Market Eagles Food Mart Eddies Body Shop Food City (Harriman) Harriman Care & Rehab Center Harriman Jewelry Exchange Harriman Public Library Hugh Russell Motors Midtown Florist & Gifts Mossy Grove Food Mart Roane Medical Center Rocky Top Markets Rocky Top Markets (Scott's MKT) Rocky Top Markets Save-A-Lot (Harriman) Schilo Foodmart Sexton Automotive Group Traughber Insurance Oasis Food Mart Harriman Home Center Renos Sporting Goods Roane Street Grill Cost Saver Exxon Food City (Kingston) Jamestowne Assisted Living Roane County Court House Rock Top Markets Rocky Top Markets Rocky Top Markets Zoning Office Spotted Spaniel Anderson County Tobacco and Market Food City (Oliver Springs) Jones Grocery Marathon Fuel Center Coin Laundry (Oliver Springs) B & M wrecker Big E's Bridge At Rockwood Carriage Hill Insurance Hardees (Rockwood) Junior's Restaurant Rockwood Care & Rehab Center Rockwood Village Apartments Rocky Top Markets S.L. Bowman & Sons Inc Victorian Square Assisted Living Wal-mart Supercenter Darnell Food Market Hardees (Wartburg) Save-A-Lot (Wartburg) Sexton Ford

Address 1226 South Roane St. Harriman,TN 37748 2843 Roane State Highway Harriman,TN 37748 828 North Roane Street Harriman,TN 37748 3209 Roane State Highway Harriman,TN 37748 230 South Roane St. Harriman,TN 37748 1301 S. Roane St. Harriman,TN 37748 201 Ruritan Rd Harriman,TN 37748 909 Georgia St Harriman,TN 37748 514 Emory Drive Harriman,TN 37748 1130 South Roane Street Harriman,TN 37748 240 Hannah Road Harriman,TN 37748 509 Roane Street Harriman,TN 37748 601 Walden Ave Harriman,TN 37748 1007 Ruritan Road Harriman,TN 37748 2744 Roane State Highway Harriman,TN 37748 1705 Morgan County Highway Harriman,TN 37748 8045 Roane Medical Center Drive Harriman,TN 37748 1811 South Roane Street Harriman,TN 37748 2722 Roane State Highway Harriman,TN 37748 102 North Roane Street Harriman,TN 37748 1225 South Roane Street Harriman,TN 37748 1901 Harriman Highway Harriman,TN 37748 269 South Roane Street Harriman,TN 37748 420 Ruritan Road Harriman,TN 37748 635 Old Roane St Harriman,TN 37748 707 Old Roane St. Harriman,TN 37748 430 N. Roane St. Harriman,TN 37748 812 N Roane St Harriman,TN 37748 615 North Kentucky Street Kingston,TN 37763 1007 East Race Street Kingston,TN 37763 1000 Ladd Landing Boulevard Kingston,TN 37763 851 Lawnville Road Kingston,TN 37763 200 East Race Street Kingston,TN 37763 935 East Race Street Kingston,TN 37763 200 West Race St Kingston,TN 37763 104 Bluff Road Kingston,TN 37763 308 North 3rd Street Kingston,TN 37763 235 Jackson Square Oak Ridge,TN 37830 S1 705 Main Street Oliver Springs,TN 37840 508 East Tri-County Boulevard Oliver Springs,TN 37840 4306 Knoxville Highway Oliver Springs,TN 37840 704 Main Street Oliver Springs,TN 37840 903 E Tri-County Boulevard Oliver Springs,TN 37748 1348 North Gateway Avenue Rockwood,TN 37854 320 North Gateway Ave Rockwood,TN 37854 5580 Roane State Highway Rockwood,TN 37854 2305 N. Gateway Ave., Ste. 8 Rockwood,Tn 37854 504 North Gateway Ave Rockwood,TN 37854 214 West Rockwood Street Rockwood,TN 37854 5580 Roane State Highway Rockwood,TN 37854 601 South Chamberlain Avenue Rockwood,TN 37854 101 South Gateway Avenue Rockwood,TN 37854 521 North Front Avenue Rockwood,TN 37854 241 South Chamberlain Avenue Rockwood,TN 37854 1102 North Gateway Avenue Rockwood,TN 37854 1014 Main Street Wartburg,TN 37887 1122 Knoxville Highway Wartburg,TN 37887 3910 Morgan County Highway Wartburg,TN 37887 1226 Knoxville Highway Wartburg,TN 37887

Phone Number (865) 590-7429 (865) 882-7888 (865) 882-2822 (865) 882-5300 (865) 882-8556 (865) 882-0880 (865) 882-6265 (865) 882-6474 (865) 882-0117 (865) 882-1613 (865) 882-4000 (865) 882-3195 (865) 882-1165 (865) 882-3603 (423) 346-5858 (865) 319-1000 (865) 882-7779 (865) 882-0075 (865) 882-0706 (865) 882-5446 (865) 882-7726 (800) 688-0833 (865) 882-1900 (865) 882-0602 (865) 882-3931 (865) 882-2450 (865) 285-6025 (865) 717-0038 (865) 376-4059 (865) 376-7534 (865) 376-3030 (865) 376-2487 (865) 376-1771 (865) 717-2832 (865) 717-4230 (865) 483-0961 (865) 435-2662 (865) 435-5353 (423) 324-4932 (865) 354-9957 (865) 354-3366 (865) 285-1390 (865) 354-4004 (865) 354-2802 (865) 354-3303 (865) 354-3945 (865) 354-2809 (865) 354-0600 (865) 354-1133 (865) 354-0863 (423) 346-3344 (423) 346-7666 (423) 346-6767 (866) 211-2642

Description Inside on wall at front window Inside on the "order here" counter Inside under counter Outside under the tabloid rack Inside on front desk Inside on top of Coin Machine Outside in our tabloid rack Outside in our tabloid rack Inside in the waiting room Outside in our tabloid rack Inside on front desk Inside on counter Inside in magazine rack Inside in the waiting room Inside on the cashier counter Inside in the magazine rack Inside in the waiting room Inside on the counter Inside to the left under the magazine racks Inside under the counter in the magazine rack Out front beside the Roane County News rack Inside in magazine rack Inside the show room Inside in the waiting room Inside on the counter Inside on the counter Inside on the counter Inside under the coat rack Inside the lobby Inside under the magazine racks Outside in our tabloid rack Inside on the front desk Inside the door Inside under the magazine racks Inside under the magazine racks Inside under the magazine racks Inside on the front desk Inside on the counter Inside on top of the lottery booth Outside in our tabloid rack Inside in the tabloid racks Inside under counter Inside on tables Inside on the counter Inside Inside on the front desk Inside on desk Inside on top of the dividers Inside the door to the left in the magazine rack Inside on the front desk Inside on the front desk Inside under the magazine racks Inside on the counter Inside on the front desk Inside our tabloid rack across from self checkout Outside in our tabloid rack Inside on the divider wall Inside under tabloid racks Inside the show room

*8,11%,/73257$%/(%8,/',1*6 .

Serving East Tn since 1975

.

.

Barns Garages Additions Housing

Compare and Save! BARN TYPE

GABLE TYPE

8x8................$895............................$995 8x10................$995..........................$1095 8x12..............$1095..........................$1245 10x10..............$1195..........................$1245 10x12..............$1295..........................$1495

Custom Build Any Size, Any Style, Your Place Or Ours

10x16..............$1695..........................$1895 10x20..............$2195..........................$2395

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865-882-5309 865-804-4400


Harriman Retail Center No Appointment Necessary!

1835 Griffith Dr

(865) 248-8122 M-F 9am - 9pm Sat 9am - 7pm Sun 11am - 6pm

Open 7 Days a Week!

Across the street from Kroger, next to Weigels

ALL HAIRCUTS $4.99! For a limited time so hurry in!


December2016  

Read the complete December 2016 Issue of The Roane Reader. Guaranteed to entertain or your money back!! This month you will find several gre...

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