Sample College Essays

THE COLLEGE ESSAY: A Collection

THE SOUND SHORE COLLECTIVE We are The Sound Shore Collective, a group of well respected, professional and successful agents in the Sound Shore.

As lifelong residents, we are proud of our roots and the families and community we have created here.

As Compass agents, we are empowered to serve our clients with the most innovative marketing and technology in the industry.

While retaining our individual businesses, The Sound Shore Collective offers combined expertise, local knowledge, and an unparalleled network and sphere of influence. We work together and believe that this unique collaboration will better serve you!

Better Together Smarter Together Working Together...

FOR YOU!

The Collective | By the Numbers Career Stats

1,125+

$1.1B+

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Sales Volume

Westchester

Westchester

Source: OneKey MLS, Office Exclusives Sales - Rented, Sold, 1/1/2011-1/11/2021

by Kaitlan Cantwell, Mary Gail Barry, Nancy McCreery, April Saxe, May Burke, June Hatch & Michael McCooey

What can I say: I am a freckle-faced, 17 year-old kid trapped in a capitalist, politicist, business news junkie’s body. When I hear CNBC or Bloomberg droning on the kitchen TV at 6:30am as I eat my bowl of Cocoa Puffs, I get pumped for my day. I don’t want to spend my summers off sitting in a lifeguard chair, watching a kiddie pool. I want to tuck my buttoned up oxford into my itchy grey slacks and pound the hot Philly streets, interning for Senator Patrick Toomey. I want to learn each and every day, and I want to do so at The Wharton School.

We are The Sound Shore Collective, a group of well

respected, professional and successful agents in the

Shore. like I’ve done leading the I want to immerse myself in Wharton’s world of businessSound and politics, Student Investment Group and the Conservatives Club in my high school. I want to discuss the As lifelong residents, arenation’s proud ofmarkets our rootsinand policies our country’s leaders are making and the impacts they will have onweour the families and community we have created here. student-run organizations like the Wharton Investment and Trading Group. How great would it be to meet up in the quad at noon with like-minded WhartonAsfriends to debate may take an Compass agents, which we are stocks empowered to serve upturn before the market closes at four? our clients with the most innovative marketing and technology in the industry.

If I am fortunate enough to be accepted to The Wharton School, I plan to be a highly active member While retaining our individual businesses, The of U Penn’s Conservatives Club and seek out opportunities to work off campus for the RNC in Sound Shore Collective offers combined expertise, Philadelphia. I would present my entrepreneurial spirit crafted from Junior (where I and local knowledge, andAchievement an unparalleled network served as President) and join the Penn Social Entrepreneurship I would relish theand ability to sphere ofMovement. influence. We work together believe that this my unique will better serve you! access the University of Pennsylvania’s resources and continue twocollaboration years of research at the Penn Wharton Budget Model. Maybe for my junior year, I could study at The London School of Economics, Betterand Together where I could further expand my understanding of business politics on a more global scale.

Smarter Together Working Together...

I also look forward to participating in the Philadelphia community FOR YOU! to the fullest extent, including

exploring the beautiful city’s diverse restaurant, cultural and art scenes. I am passionately into painting, having studied it since I was five, and hope to minor in Studio Art at the University of Pennsylvania’s School of Arts and Sciences. That said, the idea of taking classes taught by Professors Olivia Mitchell and Kent Smatters gets me especially excited. I would be honored to learn from the great Wharton professors, build relationships with them and ultimately implement the knowledge they have imparted when I start my own company or run for political office.

Since I was a young child, my father has told me stories every Sunday morning about Wharton, each with own special lesson from the school when he attended, each class in economics and TheitsCollective | Bylearned the Numbers accounting and finance wonderfully glorified. The past two summers I had the privilege to conduct research with Professor Smetters at the Penn Wharton Budget Model and live in the historic Career Kent Stats quad. The experience was everything I dreamed it would be!

1,125+

$1.1B+

Westchester

Westchester

The Wharton School at the University of Pennsylvania is a community like no other, providing the finest education to those who want to become the leaders of tomorrow. I would love nothing more than to attend so that upon graduation, I am prepared to the best of my ability to build businesses Transactions Salesmake Volume and create policies which can help a difference in people’s lives and shape our world.

Source: OneKey MLS, Office Exclusives Sales - Rented, Sold, 1/1/2011-1/11/2021

by Kaitlan Cantwell, Mary Gail Barry, Nancy McCreery, April Saxe, May Burke, June Hatch & Michael McCooey

Discuss an accomplishment, event, or realization that sparked a period of personal growth and a new understanding of yourself or others.

I had never gone to bed hungry. In Costa Rica, I went to bed hungry for a week. The family who hosted me during my 10th grade summer language immersion trip was welcoming and gracious but impoverished. The roof of their house was made of a thin sheet.

Their small, dusty ayard was Wemetal are The Sound Shore Collective, group of well filled with strange car parts and skinny chickens walking around. professional The dad gotand to successful eat those agents chickens respected, in the Sound Shore. but the rest of the family and I were only served rice and beans for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Just one small portion per person allowed. My stomach hurt. I was tired. I missed home. And I was grateful As lifelong residents, we are proud of our roots and to be there. the families and community we have created here.

My decision to take this uncomfortable trip was actuallyAsyears in the making. middle school, Compass agents, we During are empowered to serveI became involved with a New York City organization called Urbanwith Dove “UD.” UD usesmarketing sports to and our clients theormost innovative technology theUD, industry. teach at-risk teens how to become successful, independent adults.inAt I met teens living in poverty who were not just enjoying the UD sports programs, but were turning around their While retaining our individual businesses, The schoolwork to get good grades and even accepted into top colleges. They were defying the Sound Shore Collective offers combined expertise, limitations society expected from inner city at-risk teens.

I wanted to get involved.

So the summer local knowledge, and an unparalleled network and before high school, I volunteered to be a UD camp counselor.

The camp was held at a school in sphere of influence. We work together anddeep believe that this unique collaboration betterinserve the Bronx. I took the subway there on my own every day.

I was often the only whitewill person sightyou! walking from the subway to the camp. I was always the only white person at camp, and likely the Together only one there getting three healthy meals a day. It wasBetter an eye-opening experience that pushed me Smarter Together to see how life in my Westchester County suburban bubble is not the reality of our country or the Working Together... world.

FOR YOU! That summer made me realize there are so many who live in poverty and I wanted to do more to understand and help. This brought me to Costa Rica. While my evenings were spent with a grumbling stomach, my days were exciting and fulfilling. Each day after classroom time working on our Spanish, we got to interact with the local villagers. We went back and forth between using English and Spanish, each taking turns helping the other to improve our vocabulary and accent. We even got to do activities with the villagers, like play baseball and work on a small farm. It was an adventure unlike anything I had ever known. As I helped Costa Ricans with their English and their farm, they in turn helped me with my language skills and expanded my worldview. I loved it. I wanted more.

The Collective | By the Numbers So last summer,Career I traveled to the Lake Titicaca region of Peru. It was remote. Our mission was to work Stats among an isolated Peruvian community to build more housing for visitors. I learned some basic construction skills and lived with a local family. (This family served a lot more food which I appreciated because after a day of doing construction, I was starving!) Peru was especially impactful because I felt like we really made a difference improving the village and also because of little things, like this local boy who ran around and around kicking a soccer ball all day. He was so Sales proudTransactions of his soccer skills and his ball Volume and he was the happiest person I have ever met. The boy was Westchester a reminder that money and thingsWestchester don’t buy happiness. The best things in life are free.

1,125+

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Even though have hadSales some eye-opening and exotic experiences with travel and community Source: OneKey MLS, IOffice Exclusives - Rented, Sold, 1/1/2011-1/11/2021

by Kaitlan Cantwell, Mary Gail Barry, Nancy McCreery, Aprilto Saxe, May learn Burke, service, I realize I have much more see, and contribute. There are countless ways I can June Hatch & Michael McCooey continue to understand the needs of different people and communities, and there are countless ways I can help. I am committed to this. I want to make a difference. I want to be part of making our world a better place.

I’m uncomfortable speaking in public. Actually, more like terrified of it. I’ve hidden this fact pretty masterfully, playing the lead role in several theater performances, winning multiple speech competitions, even belting out the ceremonial song in front of my entire sleepaway camp. The art of giving a scripted performance is a breeze for me but ironically, I am painfully shy when the words I speak before a crowd are words of my own.

When I was selected to become a CivEd advisor for my high school, I was forced to confront my fear headon.

We are The Sound Shore Collective, a group of well respected, professional and successful agents in the

CivEd advisors are chosen by faculty members to mentor aSound groupShore. of fifty freshmen by leading group activities and building community. It is a significant honor and the role is entirely based around public residents,no weslinking are proud of our speaking. (Gulp.) Accepting the position meant there could As belifelong no self-doubt, down intoroots my and desk the families and community we have created here. chair and clamming up like a hermit crab. I was going to be fully in the spotlight leading these group activities for which there would be no script, just me and my words.agents, Here’swe a breakdown of how my first Asown Compass are empowered to serve day as a CivEd advisor went: our clients with the most innovative marketing and technology in the industry.

1) “Maya, it’s too loud in here. Please get everyone’s attention to lead today’s discussion.”

While retaining our individual businesses, The 2) My heart stopped.

Sound Shore Collective offers combined expertise, 3) I couldn’t speak. local knowledge, and an unparalleled network and 4) I giggled. (It was not pretty.) sphere of influence. We work together and believe that this unique will better serve you!

5) I stood up on a chair and attempted a meek semi-yell, “Clap once if youcollaboration can hear me.”

Better Together Watching me flounder, a sympathetic classmate came to my rescue and captured everyone’s attention for Smarter Together me. It was a mortifying. I had so many important things to say but was incapable of using my voice to say Working Together... them. In this moment, it had never been so clear that no matter how uncomfortable I felt about speaking my FOR YOU! own words before a crowd, relying on others to talk for me had to stop.

Immediately. I took a deep breath and tried, starting small by adding a few words onto another advisor’s comments. Guess what? It didn’t feel as awful as I’d feared. So I took more deep breaths, speaking once per meeting and much to my surprise, before long I found myself wanting to speak up a lot. I found this sizable confidence I never knew I had. I had a voice with meaningful contributions to make, and it felt great. All it took was a few weeks of pushing outside my comfort zone to relax and ease in.

Overcoming my fear not only powerful perspective on the value of public speaking, it helped me The Collective | Bygave themeNumbers better empathize with and inspire my advisees. For example, a painfully shy freshman girl named Sophia who I sensed had deep,Career meaningful contributions to make was consistently mute during group meetings. So I Stats began sitting with her at CivEd meetings, quietly encouraging her by reinforcing that her observations and insights have value. Wouldn’t you know it: The question, “What can our group do to bring the community closer together?” was posed at a large meeting, and Sophia raised her hand and proclaimed to the crowd, “Everyone should go out of their way to sit next to someone new each day.” Success! Shy Sophia spoke up before the group! And she spoke up because of my help.

Transactions Sales Volume Westchester Westchester Other freshmen turned to me throughout the year, seeking advice and encouragement, and it was incredibly rewarding to empower them to overcome their own fears. I spoke to them oneon- one and at group meetings without a script, own proved highly effective in guiding them. To my great surprise, I Source: OneKey MLS, Office Exclusivesand Sales -my Rented, Sold, words 1/1/2011-1/11/2021

by Kaitlan Cantwell, Mary Gail Barry, Nancy McCreery, April Saxe, Mayjust Burke,a small role in the importance of public speaking. The real discovered commanding the spotlight played June Hatch & Michael McCooey value of speaking one’s own words before a crowd was connecting with, leading and helping others. With my fear overcome, public speaking is an opportunity and challenge I’ll rise up to meet every chance I get.

1,125+

$1.1B+