San Diego Woman Holiday Issue

Photo by Dawn Nicoli/Nicoli Productions

Holiday GIFT Guides

Sarita Maybin SPEAKER Extraordinaire

CONTENTS Coming Home

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Our Dream Came True

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Pamela Stambaugh. Making Accountability Pay

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Sarita Maybin. Speaker Extraordinaire

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Shea Vaughn. Giving Women A Place to Give Back 18 Terri Yurek. Taking the Mystery Out of Medicare

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Who Is It Going to be Today?

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The Act of a Madman

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Their Aunts Loved Them, As Much As They Hated Them

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Who is Running the Asylum?

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Deana Carter. A Financial Mind and a Heart of Gold

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Only the Best!

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I Don’t Want to Grow Up… or Do I?

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Our Favorite Books

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Dr. Katherine Ludington. Gets To The Heart Of The Matter

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The Astros Win It All For Their Town

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The Mason Jar

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Pathways Academy Charter School.

Where Children Come First

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Don’t Let Your Dreams Pass You By

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Melissa Tucci. Official Realtor of the San Diego Padres

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Miramonte Indian Wells Resort & Spa. A Place to Relax and Reconnect

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Fabulous Finds 51

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The Perfect Gift 28

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Letter From the Editor Happy Holidays! It is hard to believe that we are already at that time of year. We all have so much to be thankful for and a New Year ahead with promises of new adventures and new friends that will cross our paths in 2018.

More than anything else, I am so very thankful for my family, loved ones and friends, whom I hold dear to my heart and of course my Granddaughter Addy who came into my life this year and has brought me more joy than I could ever imagine.

It is true that being a Grandma is a very special experience, even if uttering the word Grandma made me feel very old at first. I am looking forward to the day when she can call me Grandma. I do believe when you are going through the parenting phase, everything is quite frightening and stressful, but when you can relax and truly relish the little moments and stages that occur during the first year it fills your heart with such wonderment.

Of course, my first baby is this publication, San Diego Woman Magazine, and I am so thankful for all of our readers, writers, advertisers and all of the wonderful women and men who have supported us over the past ten years. I am anxious to embark on our eleventh year and have some fantastic ideas for things to come in 2018, so stay tuned.

Our cover girl Sarita Maybin is a fantastic lady and inspirational speaker who has traveled the world helping bring peace to the workplace and making coworkers appreciate each other and work well together. There is much to be learned from her keynotes, that we can carry through to our work and home life.

The lineup of incredible women who we have in this issue will revivify your belief in the capabilities of women, and be a supreme source of inspiration. It is amazing what women can accomplish when they put their minds to it, if you doubt that for even a moment, you won’t after you read their captivating stories.

We have a brand new V.I.P Club that we would like all of our readers to join. You can do so by logging on to http://www.sdwomanmagazine.com/become-a-v-i-p and answering a few quick questions. Doing so will make you eligible for special offers, contests, gifts, and giveaways, and will keep you up on everything new and exciting with San Diego Woman. Remember, this is going to be an exciting year, with many changes, don’t you want to be the first to find out? Please sign up today!

I wish you all a beautiful Holiday Season with time spent with family and friends and a New Year full of Personal and Business Success, and let’s not forget Health and Happiness. Thank you all for your continued support of San Diego Woman Magazine.

Love you all, Judith A. Habert

Letters to the Editor Happy Anniversary! I can’t believe it is ten years. Thank you everyone at San Diego Woman Magazine for giving us ten years of great insight, great articles, and great women. Can’t wait to see what the next ten will bring.

ჸჸ Lucy from San Diego I love Fran Drescher. I was so excited when I saw her on your cover. She looks fabulous. I still watch all of the reruns of “The Nanny” and they make me laugh even though I have seen them many times before. Reading her story and learning what she has done for women with uterine cancer makes me love her even more.

Thanks for sharing her story.

ჸჸ Anita from La Jolla Dr. Mimi Guarneri is in my opinion one of the best, if not the best doctor in the world. She makes me feel so comfortable when I have an appointment with her, that I no longer dread doctor’s appointments like I used to. I am so happy that your Magazine finds such outstanding women to write about.

ჸჸ Mary from La Jolla Until I read your publication I didn’t know about home staging. We are planning to sell our house next summer. I will look up Maha to see if she can help us make it look more attractive to possible buyers.

ჸჸ Linda from Escondido I was surprised to read Mom, I Think God made a mistake. It is not the usual type of article I read in your magazine. It was sad to think that any of God’s children would think of themselves as a mistake.

ჸჸ Mary Lynn from La Mesa I never heard of IV therapy until I read the article on Dr. Kristine Reese. I would love to give it a try since it makes so much sense to me. I will give her a call and see if she can help me. Thanks for keeping your readers up to date.

ჸჸ Val from Hillcrest Would I be a Sugar Baby? Hell yes, if I was 20 years younger.

ჸჸ Lori from Rancho Bernardo My husband and I loved your “Oh Baby!” section. We are expecting our first baby in January so we enjoyed seeing all of the great products that we can buy for our baby.

ჸჸ Jena & Alex from San Diego

Contributors 1. Robert Tussey Robert has been a published writer for over thirty years and has been providing editing services for the past twenty-five. As a musician, he has written scores of songs.

His life has revolved around his music and writing, often melding the two into articles and interviews.

2. Sharon Hightower Sharon is a native of California, and has lived in Chicago and Guadalajara, MX. She earned an MA in teaching English as a Second Language (TESOL) from CSULA some 20 years ago, but recently completed her MBA at Point Loma. A busy woman with 9 grandchildren, she combines teaching with her love of writing.

3. Carol Heath Carol is a Certified Clinical Master/Teacher; she is certified in a myriad of alternative modalities including Color and Sound therapy, Chakra therapy,Reflexology, Cranial and Lomi lomi massage and developed her own hands on healing method.

4. Gerald Neff With more than 40 years living and working in South America in the agriculture and forestry business. topped off with 25 years in the U.S. Embassy and Peace Corps. His writing experience includes local publicalions and years of U.S. Embassy reports; so sit back and enjoy the ride.

Gerald Neff can be contacted at 760 796 4877.

5. Debbie Storms Debbie has enjoyed many careers from accountant to air traffic controller.

She believes life is an adventure to be lived to its fullest.

Growing up in New Jersey, she learned life skills to help her practice that credo. Her passion for travel has taken her to many parts of the world. She is now focusing on writing about her travels and interviewing entertainers, which is a great combo!

6. Janice Carter-Booth Janice is a massage therapist who loves spending time with any amount of her 15 grandchildren. Her favorite activities are swimming and writing.

7. Maggie Ramos Maggie Ramos is a student at MiraCosta College and is artistically multi talented. She is a great writer, painter and a skilled photographer, thanks to several recent courses. She puts her soul and heart in every piece she creates. Her art and writing pieces tend to be very emotional. Maggie creates art based on self experiences and from experiences of those around her or strangers that she encounters.

Maggie is grateful and very fortunate for meeting good people in her life; often finding a mentor or an awsome supporter where or when least expected.

8. Dawn Nicoli For over 20 years Dawn has owned and operated Nicoli Productions, an environmental portrait studio, run out of her two-acre property in Escondido.

Starting a new chapter of her life, when serenity has become so important, Dawn spends her time in her palapa tree house with her dog, Karma. exploring the world of writing.

Don’t miss the wonderful photo essay about Dawn’s Journey “Coming Home.”

9. Lorraine Preda Retired, enjoys life with partner in San Diego. Finds her true-self through creative expression by writing poems, short stories and painting.

I N F O R M I N G, E N T E R TA I N I N G, A N D F E AT U R I N G T H E W O M E N O F S A N D I E G O

Behind the Pages Judith A. Habert

Publisher/Editor-in-Chief

Carol Heath Assistant Editor

Jaime V. Habert

Entertainment Editor/ Copyeditor

Dawn Nicoli Photographer

Judith A. Habert Publisher/Editor-in-Chief

Lisa K Miller

editor@sdwomanmagazine.com

Photographer

Deanna Haala Photographer

Raya Tkachenko Graphic Designer

11835 Carmel Mountain Road Suite 1304-346 San Diego, CA 92128

888 275 7125 858 735 5301 www.sdwomanmagazine.com Carol Heath Assistant Editor Facebook.com/SanDiegoWoman

Jaime V. Habert Entertainment Editor/Copyeditor

SUBSCRIPTION INFORMATION Annual subscriptions available on request Please send name, mailing address, and check for $25.00 payable to San Diego Woman Magazine 11835 Carmel Mountain Road Suite 1304-346 San Diego, CA 92128 Subscriptions can also be purchased online at www.sdwomanmagazine.com

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Disclaimer: Products, services, practices, websites or informational packets mentioned within our pages are in no way an endorsement by San Diego Woman, but are provided to our readers for informational purposes only.

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Coming Home

Living a Life Missed Through Words & Images

By Dawn Nicoli

Photos by Dawn Nicoli/Nicoli Productions

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KNEW FROM A VERY young age that I was different. I did not come from my mother’s stomach like everyone else. I was adopted.

For anyone who has never known their birth parents, it is a very odd sensation to wonder how you got here. I wondered if I was an alien who had fallen from the sky.

But I knew I had a mother somewhere, and when I was old enough, I hired a private detective to find her.

The detective found my birthmother, over in Ireland along with my aunts, uncle, my four cousins and even my 87-year-old grandmother.

We had an address! I wrote my mother a letter and soon flew out to meet her. It was a magical experience and one that filled a deep void in my life and perhaps hers also.

I have been back to Ireland four more times and each time is no less magical.

The first time was to meet my mother. The second was for her funeral five years later. The third was for one of my cousin’s weddings, and the last two for family reunions.

The family has always treated me with welcoming arms, like a long-lost surprise. To say that I have been blessed is more than a cliché; it’s nothing less

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than a miracle to have reconnected with all of them.

As the years went on, I found myself entering the second half of life.

During the past five years, I have lost both my adopted parents, my best friend of 30 years to cancer and suffered a divorce after 20 years of marriage. To top it off I lost my dog, who had been there for me throughout it all.

I couldn’t help but ask myself, “Where do I go from here?”

So when my Aunts called from Ireland to say they were planning another reunion, I jumped at the chance to get out of the oppressive September heat in California and smell the sweet aroma of bog as it burns in the fireplaces.

The things I noticed about Ireland this time were more than the endless sheep roaming the countryside of stone ruins and castles.

It seemed to be a slower, simpler way of life, with integrity being of higher value than accomplishment.

Legend and history run deep here, and I couldn’t help but realize that I had come full circle, back to my roots to get back in touch with who I really am.

My four male cousins are more like brothers to me, and we sat around the table at mealtime, reminiscing about how we came to find each other.

The next generation listens with open ears and

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always laughs at the part about the youngest lad answering the phone call from the detective. My cousin had such a thick Irish accent that the detective could barely understand him. In his inexperience, my cousin readily gave the address with no questions.

I was able to write to my birth mother, and the rest is history. We often wonder if someone else had answered that infamous phone call if things might have been different.

My niece made me smile when she said this was her most favorite story that she tells her friends. I have to say it’s mine too.

The last few days I spent in a cottage by the sea in Connemara. I would walk for miles with my camera, climbing stone walls, and sliding through cattle gates to find myself surrounded by abandoned stone houses, half standing, each with a legend to share.

I wondered what my Mother would have said if she saw how everything had lived on among the family.

I remember her saying to me, “Ah Dawn, you can have the sheep. I’ll take the city lights of New York any day.” We had so many things in common, but our love of the city was not one of them.

Perhaps there is a bit of my birth father in me somewhere. But that’s another story.

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Our 10th Anniversary Women of Distinction

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N NOVEMBER 28, 2017, Lisa and Darius Miller will celebrated their 30th wedding anniversary. What do you give your spouse for a 30th anniversary present?

Lisa was raised in Pennsylvania, the 5th of 7 children so, she learned the art of survival. Her father died when Lisa was just 13, and her mother became a single mom raising 7 kids; a daunting thought!

After earning her degree in college, Lisa taught Home Economics for 6 years, married Darius, had twin girls, and moved from Pennsylvania to California for a job opportunity that Darius could not turn down. As a young mother newly relocated in Southern California, Lisa wanted to become active in the community. She enrolled in Palomar Community College in San Marcos.

There, she concentrated on learning more about one of her passions, photography. Being a photographer allowed Lisa the time she wanted to spend with her twin daughters being an active participant in their lives.

Darius was working in corporate America in a high stress job and seemed to be thriving. Lisa opened a photography studio and her business was slowly growing. The twins were growing, as kids have a tendency to do. The Millers were the picture of a typical

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Southern California family. Darius and Lisa shared one common passion, beside their twins that is, that passion was wine. They spent hours watching videos, taking classes together, going to wine tasting events, and many hours discussing when it came time to retire, they would retire into the wine industry.

opening a winery and she happily agreed. It was something they had prepared for and the Millers decided to ‘go for it’.

On April 25, 2015, Koi Zen Cellars opened its’ doors in Carmel Mountain Ranch, formerly known as Photography by Lisa K. Koi Zen is a craft winery, which is like any other

the best of a selection of fields. Koi Zen buys their grapes from the Northern California, the Santa Barbara, Paso Robles, area. Once the grapes are selected, they are destemmed, fermented and pressed together, and put in a barrel to age. This process gives Koi Zen, the ability to create their own blends of wine.

Our Dream Came True

By Carol Heath

Photo Courtesy of Lisa K. Miller

Life gives us challenges when we least expect them, and the Millers were about to get one of those challenges when at the age of 51, Darius suffered a stroke from stress and high blood pressure.

After some soul-searching Darius declared he was not going to go back to the stress of corporate America. He told Lisa he wanted to pursue the dream of

winery you’ve been to, it just doesn’t have a vineyard, and is usually located in an industrial park or a commercial space. In just 2 short years, Koi Zen Cellars, was voted #1 Local Winery, by the readers of the San Diego Union Tribune.

One advantage to a craft winery is that you are not limited to just one field of grapes, instead you can buy

Koi is known for its’ red blends and Malbec is arguably their best and most popular red wine.

This craft winery has produced some 2800 cases of wine in 2017, not bad for a couple of kids from Pennsylvania.

Koi Zen Winery is an intimate and welcoming place to go and spend an evening with friends, or better yet, with that special someone. For $20 you can try 5 wines in a tasting flight plus get a glass of your favorite wine. This craft winery has a tasting room and a gift shop that offers ‘all things’ about wine.

There is also an area that has just been developed by the Millers, which can accommodate about 125 people, for private parties, small weddings, and meetings.

If you are like me, you are probably wondering why name a craft winery, Koi Zen. Lisa was kind enough to relay that Darius built a small koi pond in their back yard. They made this area a place where Lisa and Darius could relax, meditate, or just have a relaxing glass of wine. They called it their ‘zen’ spot, ergo, Koi Zen was christened and their dream came into fruition.

Remember I asked what you would give your spouse as a gift for your 30th anniversary?

Well, Darius gave Lisa something very special, he created ‘Lot 1187’!

What a romantic this guy is, can you imagine having a wine created to celebrate your special day some 30 years ago?

Koi Zen Cellars, 12225 World Trade Drive, Suite P, San Diego, California.

Visit www.KoiZenCellars.com for hours, events and photos.

Our 10th Anniversary Women of Distinction

PAMEL A STAMBAUGH Making Accountability Pay

By Judith A. Habert Photo by Dawn Nicoli/Nicoli Productions

A

S A YOUNG GIRL AT the start of her college career, Pamela Stambaugh found herself facing a bit of a dilemma. It wasn’t in what direction she would take; she knew exactly what she wanted to do. She wanted to enter into the world of business. Unfortunately, at the time Pamela’s father believed that meant send her to secretarial school. Secretarial training wasn’t even close to the direction for which Pamela was heading.

After four years of teaching high school English and Journalism, Pamela moved in the direction she dreamed of and attended the University of San Diego to obtain her MBA. Today Pamela stands among CEOs, Presidents, and emerging leaders helping them improve the inner workings of their companies, ‘one conversation at a time.’ How does a young girl from Wyoming end up traveling the country doing what she does, at the level she does? Hard work, determination, intelligence and some very unique tools to make what she does exceptional.

If only her Dad could see her now! Pamela Stambaugh, President of

Accountability Pays, Performance Advisor to Teams and Leaders, spends her days working with executives on how to tap the best

keep their high potentials challenged such that they tap their potential and have an appropriate career path, the future of their firm may

within themselves and their emerging leaders so that, like Goldilocks, they lead their teams with not too much authoritative direction and not too little. Not too much debate and not too little. Just right. Over 17 years she has worked side-by-side with over 1000 leaders on what makes them tick and on how to bring their A game, knowing that if leaders don’t find a way to

not be bright. “I spend a lot of my time today on succession planning, and rightly so,” she quipped.

Her Why As we talked Pamela, reflecting on her journey, said, “I think many of us start out trying to identify our ‘why’.

We search for what inspires us to do what we do. I wanted to help leaders inspire others and contribute to the

world beyond themselves and their selfish desires — to be real leaders who lead with integrity, with love, and listen for peoples’ greatness.

I wanted to see more of that, to encourage it.”

One of Pamela’s heroes is Dr. Peter Drucker, who said, “The ability to make good decisions regarding people represents one of the last reliable sources of competitive advantage since very few organizations are very good at it.”

This contextual background has led Pamela to do a lot of work with high potentials, who are our future leaders. Pamela adds, “They have been my passion.” For five years Pamela was a Vistage Chair, which combined with her other consulting experiences helped her understand that culture runs downhill from leadership’s direction which directly impacts outcomes.

Leaders must attend to creating financial stakeholder value, but the impact of leaders under-valuing human contributions to financial success means negative outcomes for all stakeholders. Pamela’s company Accountability Pays is aptly named because a great leader must be accountable

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Our 10th Anniversary Women of Distinction and expect accountability from their teams. Additionally, Pamela noted, “A leader must be trustworthy.

With the level of trust in our country right now being at an all-time low according to the Edelman Trust Barometer (https://www.edelman. com/trust2017/), leaders must demonstrate integrity and consciousness about the broader world when making their decisions. We have a lot of fear in the world right now, so our leaders have to be solid citizens going forward to deal with our current world.”

One Powerful Tool What one method did Pamela find that makes her stand out among those who attempt to direct future good leaders to become great and great leaders to become exceptional? “I would have to say it is one of the major tools that I use, which is the Harrison Assessment™.” I had heard of this before, but never quite understood what it was, or honestly didn’t know anyone who had used it in their business.

Being from New York, and yes, it is the skeptical capital of the world, I like to try out products that I review. I feel this way whether it is a review of a new product on the market or an employee assessment that is touted as one of, if not the greatest, tool to assess the hiring, management, growth, leadership potential and the suitability of an individual for his or her job.

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When Pamela offered to have me take the Harrison Assessment™ I agreed, although I must admit, a part of me may have been a bit frightened to find out if I was cut out to be in a leadership position. Was I running this Magazine the way I should, or perhaps I should hand the reigns over to a more qualified leader.

After much procrastination, something I am admittedly very good at, I sat at my computer and took the twenty-minute assessment that would be eyes into my personality, leadership, team skills — my underlying work preferences. During that experience I wondered one thing. Yes, the New Yorker reared its ugly head again, could a person cheat on this test? After the first few questions, I realized it was way too well designed for that and in fact provides a mechanism for detecting attempts to cheat. The Harrison Assessment™ was the creation of Dan Harrison, Ph.D. who came up with this groundbreaking

technology based on Enjoyment Performance Theory and Paradox Technology™.

Harrison’s education and background were in organizational psychology and mathematics. It provides deep insight into the selection of the right candidates for a specific job, which is based on research into high, medium and low performers. The Harrison software system includes 6,500 different jobs.

A great tool is just that — a tool unless it is placed in the hands of a great facilitator. Pamela Stambaugh is an outstanding facilitator. I took the Harrison Assessment™, and if I am 100% honest, from a short 20-minute experience it appears that Pamela now knows more about me than even my closest friends.

Truthfully though the assessment, comparing me to 175 behavioral tendencies, was right on regarding my work preferences. The great thing was that it didn’t just report these findings, it told me ways to improve the

traits to avoid that would hinder my performance as a leader, and how to benefit from my strengths that uniquely help me in my job.

I learned more about who I am concerning leadership and communication skills and how I handle stress than any other information I have ever been given.

One of the interesting facts that I learned about the Harrison Assessment™ from the founder Dr. Harrison is that unconscious preferences often dictates how we behave at work, so simply asking interview questions will not always provide accurate insight into the person you are hiring.

Accountability Pays is a Certified Women-owned Business, meaning she meets their high business standard. It is a designation of which Pamela is very proud.

The Process The image below helps to explain what it takes to achieve breakaway success; excellence in the executive suite creates trust. With an

Our 10th Anniversary Women of Distinction A-Team you are headed for breakaway success. Don’t settle for less — and take the high road to get there.

It is a pretty straightforward approach. Pamela said it this way; “Executive excellence in communication, one conversation at a time, builds trust among employees and keeps them engaged so that they grow with the company and when engagement and an A team are present, Breakaway Success is available and probable.”

Pamela continued, “I use a triangulated approach to gathering data from three different perspectives starting with the Harrison Assessment™ about self. Then I get feedback from the team by assessing how effective their team is in producing results together. Separately, direct reports assess how well their manager is garnering discretionary effort and loyalty. From these factbased inputs I then coach the team and the leader.

“Once I know the company’s goals, their needs, their budgetary considerations and how much time they have available, I will design my offering to accommodate their needs.”

With all of Pamela’s experience working with CEO’s, often of her own generation, I had to ask how things are different when she is faced with the new Millennial CEOs, the

younger generation who seem to approach life and business from a much different vantage point than the past generation. “I am not really worried about Millennials, although some people appear to be because, in the end, they love to produce results. Sure, they may travel to the beat of a different drum, but they are as concerned as past generations of CEOs with achieving success.”

This, of course, led me to ask Pamela if there were people you just couldn’t fix.

“I only coach people who want to be coached and who are coachable.” One of Pamela’s leadership programs includes Executive Coaching, three Assessments, and three HalfDay Live Events. She has recently been working with one company for over two and a half years using all three tools. Her coaching includes the future successor to the current CEO. As advisor to both the CEO and executive team members, she is proud of their growing willingness and muscle to address tough issues straight on without getting personal and therefore getting to desired results more efficiently and effectively. The successor to the CEO said this about Pamela’s contribution: “Every company should use your leadership devel-

opment program! For us, you have facilitated four significant upgrades: • Changed and improved how we make hiring decisions • Change and improved how we communicate with new hires • Changed and improved how we interact with one another as an executive team • You helped us eliminate the excessive and destructive gossiping For me, you keep me focused on the critical things so I can grow myself into a leader, as the successor to the CEO.” As near as I can tell Accountability Pays helps to reduce a company’s vulnerability of losing key employees, helps to increase employee engagement and can help your team produce unprecedented results too.

Pamela and her husband Larry have something in common with San Diego Woman Magazine; they too are celebrating their tenth anniversary. I asked if Larry was supportive of her business, and also the amount of travel she has to do. “Yes, he is extremely supportive, he even insists all of his clients take the Harrison Assessment™. I can’t think of anything more supportive than that.” She smiled broadly.

For more information on Pamela and her firm Accountability Pays visit her two websites at www.accountabilitypays.com or www.accountabilitypays.harrisonassessments.com

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K E E P I N G

T H E

H O P E

A L I V E

Photography by Deanna Haala

I

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CANNOT IMAGINE A HORROR WORSE THAN losing a child. I am in awe of those who can move forward and make something wonderful to serve the community out of their own pain and suffering. Kelly, Brent, and Tyler King have been doing this after the gruesome findings that their beautiful 17-year-old daughter, Chelsea, would never be coming home to them. Chelsea disappeared on February 25, 2010, while on a routine run in the Rancho Bernardo Community Park.

Every day since the family has worked tirelessly to help protect other children so no family will ever suffer this type of profound loss. Through two major fundraising events a year they raise the majority of funds for the Chelsea Light Foundation.

Below are photos taken at Homerun for Chelsea one of these two events. The other, Finish Chelsea’s Run, takes place March 2nd in Balboa Park. These are both community-based events that bring families together working towards a common goal, making our children safe again.

I had the opportunity to speak with Chelsea's Mom Kelly to ask how she and her family found the strength to move forward and what led them

that would commit violent sexual crimes against them. Chelsea's Light Foundation allows Brent, Tyler and me a chance to give back to a commu-

to create the Chelsea's Light Foundation. I could never put it more eloquently as Kelly King did. So please read her words below: “Our decision to create the Chelsea's Light Foundation was at it's very heart, a decision to choose hope over despair, love over rage and faith that even though our daughter's life was cut short in the most unimaginable way, the beauty of her spirit would live on and make the world a better place. We seek to protect the joy and innocence of childhood through an engaged community. We provide scholarships to extraordinary kids, so they may realize their dreams of going to college just as our daughter dreamed of doing. We also provide (through our Joie de Vivre scholarship program) opportunities for kids to enjoy extracurricular activities like music lessons, soccer camp or anything that brings them joy, but that their families are unable to provide due to lack of resources. And of course, we seek to make this a safer world for every child by passing laws that toughens sentencing against those

If you want to make a difference too, there are several ways to engage with Chelsea's Light.

Visit their website www.chelseaslight.org to learn more about them. Join the 112k social media followers by liking them on Facebook or Twitter, register as a participant or a fundraiser for Finish Chelsea's Run on March 2, 2018, in Balboa Park or sign up as a volunteer.

nity that gave so much to us during our darkest hours and to keep Chelsea's dream of making this world a better place alive and strong for generations to come.”

With 112k Social Media followers assisting to make sure that legislators pay attention to our kid’s rights we are certain that Chelsea’s Light and their Followers are making a difference.

A 10th Anniversary Special Feature

Sarita Maybin S P E A K E R

Extraordinaire

By Judith A. Habert

Photos by Dawn Nicoli/Nicoli Productions

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HE CROWDED ROOM expels a collective laugh as Sarita Maybin reels off those famous words that almost all of us recall hearing from our Moms when we were growing up. Starting the phrase and challenging the audience to complete it “If it ain’t broke… sticks and stones may break my bones… If you can’t say something nice…” Of course, the chorus of answers comes loud and clear from the audience, because for the majority of those in the room, this was how we learned life lessons. Sarita Maybin brings these lessons back to us, but with an updated twist allowing us to understand how our communication skills may have been learned many many years ago, but now “with just one small adjustment,” we can make it work in today’s world.

Sarita was an Army brat growing up all over the world, the oldest of four children. She graduated from high school in Germany and came back to the states to attend the University of Maryland for both undergraduate

and graduate degrees. Her life’s ambition was Academia, utilizing her undergraduate degree in psychology and her master’s degree in counseling to hold the position as University Dean of Students.

Although she loved her interactions with students, the quiet office in the back of the administration building did not fulfill a need in Sarita, who was at her best when she was communicating with people. When her ex-husband, previously stationed at Camp Pendleton, was given a recruiting assignment back east, Sarita gave her notice to the University and decided it might, in fact, be time to pursue a career that was more in line with who she was and what gave her joy in life.

On a whim, Sarita sent a video to CareerTrack who was impressed and brought her on board as an independent contract trainer.

Several years later, when that contract abruptly ended due to a reorganization, Sarita started venturing out on the speaking circuit, utilizing her impressive backgrounds in both psychology and coun-

seling to impart what she had learned over the years. Her focus was in an area she felt was so important, particularly in the existing corporate climate, the ability to successfully communicate.

Sarita’s alignment with a marketing partner and a few speaker’s bureaus soon had her traveling not only the country but the world. She is an international speaker and communication expert whose audiences have fun learning how to stay positive.

“When people ask me my mission statement it is simply stated, “Helping people work together better” at least this is my formal mission statement, but several of my clients have said a better one would be “Helping people play nicely at work.” Sarita has successfully been doing so for over 23 years.

Since 1993, Sarita has spoken in all 50 states, Puerto Rico, Mexico, Jamaica, Canada, England, Asia, and Iceland.

She was also voted a 2012 Top 5 Communication Speaker and had the privilege of speaking on the prestigious TEDx stage.

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A 10th Anniversary Special Feature Her Book “If You Can’t Say Something Nice, What Do You Say?” offers practical solutions for working together better. Being known as an International Speaker and Communication Expert is a big jump from the shy Army brat that she was growing up. At a training retreat, while surrounded by other speakers she garnered an interesting fact, “There were 8 of us sitting around talking, 6 of the 8 had transient upbringings,

not take me long to understand her appeal, and why she was such a sought-after speaker. Over the years in this business, and many corporate positions, I have witnessed my share of keynote speakers, but not one like Sarita. The room was buzzing, and engaged and the way she interacted with the audience was astonishing. She made the audience do something that is truly the mark of a great speaker, a speaker extraordi-

either due to our families being in the military, or having parents with jobs that caused them to move frequently. We surmised that you probably had to be accustomed to this kind of lifestyle to be a professional speaker. Who else could just pick up and go to a strange city or country, get up in front of a crowded room full of strangers and act as if you own the place.”

After attending a recent speaking engagement, where Sarita was the keynote, it did

naire; she made them THINK. The entire audience was engaged. Sarita presented various points she asked them to discuss with their “BFFN.” This was the term she offered at the beginning of her presentation, in asking the group to form an alliance with the person to their right, not their Best Friend forever, but their Best Friend, for NOW, they eagerly shared their thoughts with each other. Sarita used humor, experiences, storytelling and great information,

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How to Become a PROFESSIONAL SPEAKER Many of our readers have found themselves in the audience listening to a speaker and wondering how they started on the speaking circuit and wondering if they could possibly share their expertise with others as well.

So, of course I had to ask Sarita if she could impart her insight and maybe a few tips for making this dream a reality for the soon to be professional speakers in our audience. I asked if she could provide even a single tip to help someone who would like to go this route at some point in their career.

Sarita shared the following “One of the things I say when asked this question is that one of the best things you can do is offer to speak at events for free. Go to your local Chamber of Commerce and do a presentation at no charge. This is time better spent than making 100 cold calls to companies to ask if they are in need of a speaker. Once they see you in action and hear what you have to say, if they like what they see, they will undoubtedly contact you when planning their next sales meeting or event requiring a speaker."

Sarita also suggested speaking for free at local chapters of organizations as this can often become a stepping stone to being asked to be a presenter on the national level “I have had this happen several times where I spoke to a local chapter, and the national president was in attendance. After they heard the presentation, they invited me to their annual event to be a keynote."

The last bit of advice she provided was to realize your own limitations regarding the proper and productive use of your time. “I partnered with a marketing person, who has been with me about fifteen years, who works on commission and handles all my follow up on leads when I speak. So, when I am handed business cards, or asked if I am available on a certain date, instead of trying to act like superwoman and do it all, I turn that part of my business over to my assistant who handles, bookings, fees, contracts, etc. This way I can focus on researching, writing and getting ready for my presentations…sometimes all while on the road.”

Sarita suggested joining a Toastmasters club to fine tune your speaking skills as she did before leaving her "day job." You may also want to sign up for the National Speakers Association (NSA) Academy Membership for aspiring speakers to prepare yourself to be eligible for NSA Professional Membership. (Sarita is a Past President of NSA San Diego Chapter.)

Since one of the most enjoyable elements of listening to a speaker to me is the element of humor, we discussed the importance of entertaining your audience, regardless of the topic of which you are speaking. Sarita adds, "Yes, I am often asked if you need to be funny to be a speaker, and my response is always the same…

Only if you want to get paid."

A 10th Anniversary Special Feature which guaranteed that her audience came away not only entertained but enlightened.

Since one of the great fears that many of us struggle with is public speaking, I had to ask what Sarita felt was the secret to speaking to large groups of people without fear? “The secret to speaking without fear is speaking about something you know” When it comes to communication and improving harmony in the workplace this is certainly something Sarita Maybin knows.

Sarita explains, “Being the oldest of four I did find myself in the role of Bossy Big Sister at home, so when I got into the business world, I had to find a way to be the boss, without appearing bossy. This is not always such an easy task. What I learned was if I incorporated a small change in how I spoke to my co-workers I could actually get what I wanted, without them feeling as if I was condescending or being ‘bossy.’ I learned to rephrase what I said to them. So instead of saying ‘you better, you need to, or you will, I learned to say ‘I need you to, I would appreciate, I would prefer.’ These slight modifications made a huge difference in being able to get what I wanted.”

Luckily Sarita’s insights into getting what she wanted in the workplace, have not only helped her to be a better communicator but through her keynotes and speaking engagements worldwide she has spread the word to thousands who now use these bits of knowledge to create peace and harmony in their workspace.

Sarita’s approachable style and ability to adlib when needed keeps her presenta-

tions fresh. In a recent return appearance, some five years after she had spoken at a particular company function, the organizer asked Sarita if she could repeat a concept she had presented in her first keynote. The concept was one of Sarita’s favorite; it was entitled the 3 P’s for Staying Positive.

She had learned about these from the writings of Martin Seligman, the granddaddy of the positive psychology movement. “The group could

group and asked if they had remembered them. They giggled and said no, but they had come up with their own list. Pasta, Pino Grigio, and Prozac. Sarita laughed right along with them secure that because of this joke made in this small group it was likely that they would remember the concept.

Communication takes on many different facets in today’s business world. One of Sarita’s more popular Keynote

only remember the first one which was ‘Not taking things Personally’ the second and third respectively were ‘Nothing is Permanent, so things will change,’ and ‘Look at the big Picture, not just what is going on at that distinct moment.’” The group was feverishly trying to remember from her talk five years earlier when she heard one group laughing hysterically in the back corner. Sarita knew that her 3 P’s weren’t that funny, so she walked over to the

and Workshop Topics is one she created on the spot when the powers that be decided to switch the script on her at the last moment, before she was to deliver a keynote in Kingston, Jamaica. The organizers suddenly decided that what their employees really needed, was to learn how to communicate in a world riddled with constant changes in technology. As a savvy businesswoman and polished speaker, nothing frazzles this woman who confident-

ly responded, “Of course I could present a keynote on that topic!” With the help of her tech-savvy sister and a survey of a trusted tech team, she not only pulled it off, but this has become her most requested topic, because she has answered questions all of us in the business world need to know the answer to, “How to Maintain High-Touch Relationships in High-Tech Times.” Sarita shares, “At the time it was a speech that I didn’t know I needed and now I don’t know how I lived without it since it involves all of us. How do we know when it is appropriate to send a text and not make a call? In a business world that incorporates Baby Boomers and Millennials in the same office space, should we assume a call is more appropriate for one age group when in fact it may not be? My keynote on this topic helps answer this question and much more.”

In fact, there is no question Sarita won’t answer to please her audience, well maybe details about her beautiful 25 year-old daughter or her recent marriage to her dashing husband with whom she just purchased a brand new home, but when it comes to communication and playing nice with others, Sarita Maybin has the answer.

For more information on Sarita including her keynote and workshop topics visit Sarita at her website at Saritamaybin.com. You can check on her availability and book her for your next corporate function. Text SARITATALK to 22828 to join Sarita’s email list.

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Our 10th Anniversary Women of Distinction

Shea Vaughn

GIVING WOMEN A PLACE TO GIVE BACK

By Judith A. Habert

Photos Courtesy of Shea Vaughn

When you think of powerhouse women, women with boundless energy and drive, women who turn their beliefs into action, and action into accomplishment, there is no name that comes to mind ahead of Shea Vaughn. I had the great pleasure of conducting a phone interview with Shea recently, and within the first five minutes, I knew that this was not a woman to take lightly. I also understood why she was proclaimed America’s Queen of Wellness.

Many of you may know her for her innovative values-based and doctor endorsed lifestyle practice aptly named SheaNetics®.

SheaNetics® is based on the 5 Principles of WellnessCommitment, Perseverance, Self-Control, Integrity, and Love. The designated workout which accompanies these principles, entitled SheaFit, is unique in that it combines all of our favorite disciplines.

Shea explains how this came about, “SheaNetics® was birthed as a result of my teaching a bunch of classes and I wondered why couldn’t I combine some of these? I know people don't have time to take a ballet class, a pilates class, and a Tai Chi class, so I started teaching my classes and throwing all of these different exercise methods into it. The reaction was so

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positive that I decided to trademark it as SheaNetics® There are proven movements from pilates, mixed martial arts, yoga, Gyrokenisis®, and dance. This workout will leave you with killer core strength, but best of all it can be modified for all age groups and fitness levels, with the same results, amazing. I asked Shea what she believes to be most important in achieving the goals set out throughout her programs “A strong positive attitude will create more

the importance of a positive attitude on their health and wellbeing. People often commit to a health regiment and don't stick with it. As Shea reminds us, “It’s not a New Year’s resolution, it has to be something you maintain.

You must be willing to put in the work. You can’t just want it, then not follow through with the commitment and self-control necessary to achieve your goal. What it really comes down to is for a person to accomplish their

miracles than any wonder drug.” This is obvious while speaking with Shea; she is upbeat and positive about life and wellness.

Shea’s recent book, Breakthrough: The 5 Living Principles to Defeat Stress, Look Great and Find Total Well-being shows you how to be in the moment and inspire positive mind-body transformations that enrich your life by creating a personal state of well-being. This book should be required reading for anyone who ever doubted

goals they have to want it.

They may need it, but unless they truly want it, they will never succeed in reaching their desired end result. It has to be at the same level of the importance of making their mortgage payment.

You have to put 100% of your effort into it. 30% won’t do it, neither will 99%.”

What proves her principles more than anything is the fact that Shea lives them.

“I am up at 4 am every day.

I start my day off going to the gym where I spend two

hours doing my personal workout, and then I start teaching classes. I teach spin classes, SheaNetics® classes and strength classes. In between this schedule, I handle my other businesses." Yes, amazingly so, Shea’s interests are not limited to only her groundbreaking exercise programs, her books, videos, and speaking engagements. She also is the Co-founder of the Women’s Broadcast Television Network (WBTVN). The first OTT online digital TV network with original content created for women from next door to across the globe. Through smart technology, WBTVN has access to a growing audience of over 30 million viewers through Roku, AppleTV, Chromcast, Amazon Fire, Google Play, ITunes and more!

As noted on their website, On WBTVN - Women Connect, Collaborate & Communicate.

Shea explains that when it comes to being a host on her Network, “You Don’t Have to Be a Celebrity to Be a Star.”

Not knowing anyone who began a TV Network, if you don’t count Oprah, and realizing that this is a massive undertaking, I had to ask how this network idea came about. “I was an ongoing contributor to a number of major stations, and I always wanted to host my own show, and I got so close to it.

This fact made me step back and look at all the women out there and all they have

Our 10th Anniversary Women of Distinction accomplished. I've known women who wrote books, mentored, were abused sexually, physically assaulted, lost their parents at a young age, and yet they pulled themselves up and had overcome these hardships.

Since they had done so, they now wanted to share these stories with other women who might be going through similar things, but clearly, women don’t have the same opportunities in the media.

So, I wanted to build it for them. I wanted to provide a place where they could do just this. I found my partner Jayne Rios, and she is probably one of the best IT people on the face of the earth, and we chatted about this.

We both felt strongly about creating this for women who wanted to host their own shows and shortly after that Women's Broadcast Television Network was born. The OTT, over the top, is changing the way people watch TV. Traditional TV viewership has gone down. Instead, they are increasingly watching only On-demand programming.

This is an important element of Internet TV. People’s time is so limited they have little time to watch a lot of different shows. With this type of format, they can watch the type of show they want, when they want to watch it.

WBTVN is a dream come true for a lot of people. A place to call home for all of the products, services, and books that these women produced, and an opportunity for a broader audience to hear about their products, and learn about what they have done. They can do a month’s worth of shows in one day and have all the content needed for their shows for the month.

“We have studios in both Los Angeles and Dallas, but women can videotape from anywhere in the country, they don't have to be where we are. They can host from wherever they live.”

WBTVN was launched in October 2016. It almost immediately went viral. People love it. We reach a viewing audience of over 30 million.

WBTVN is always looking for serious hosts who really want to do their own show and own their own content. If you have interest in being a show host on this amazing Women’s Network, you can do so by contacting Shea Vaughn at shea@wbtvn.tv, or you can call her at 847 846 6570.

Oh, and there is one little fact I have not mentioned up until now. Shea has a pretty famous Son, Actor, and Comedian Vince Vaughn. So, I had to ask how Vince felt about her TV network and SheaNetics® and the many other businesses that Shea manages on a daily basis. I must admit she put me in my place right away with the following response. “First of all, I have three children Victoria, Valeri, and Vince. As a mom, you love them all the same. Actually, they are all in the business, but the girls are behind the camera, Vince is more well-known because he is in front of it. My girls are producers and writers. But to answer your question, Vince has the biggest heart in the world, and he is so supportive of me and what I do, and I am very proud of him and all of my children." I asked if it helped to have children in the industry when Shea was launching her business and her network, and she said, "No, they are all too busy in their own careers to help. We have great support for each

other, If any of us needed help, we would speak up. I'm a big girl, so I do it myself, and I like it that way.” It is quite apparent that Shea Vaughn does do it all herself, which makes her quite an amazing lady.

To find out more about SheaNetics® and SheaFit visit Shea’s website at https:// sheavaughn.com/ To tune in to WBTVN Download the App: Women on TV or watch online at www.wbtvn.tv To learn more about hosting a show on the WBTVN network visit: www.wbtvn.tv Some Words of Advice for Our Readers From Shea Vaughn: 1. In building your business, a crucial step is finding great people with whom to connect. Good partners, good vendors and good professionals. If you are not good at something, don’t cut corners and try to do it yourself. Find someone who is good at it. Always look for the person with the reputation as number one in the field.

2. Collaboration is deeply embedded in my soul. I think it is critical to find people who think like you do and want to give back. Women are not always good at collaboration due to jealousy, flirting, etc.

These characteristics never serve them well. Women need to unite to get rid of the competition. Always lead by example.

3. Communication is crucial. You have to be able to have your elevator pitch ready for anyone who asks about what it is you do. I put women on tv, and I give them a broader audience for them to be able to get their message out there. Be sure that you communicate your message clearly.

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Our 10th Anniversary Women of Distinction

T

Terri Yurek

TAKING THE MYSTERY OUT OF MEDICARE Photo by Dawn Nicoli/Nicoli Productions

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HERE ARE TIMES WHEN you meet someone for the first time, and you can tell; this is someone who could become your best friend. I sensed that when I had the pleasure of interviewing Terri Yurek. Although she was born and raised in Coon Rapids Minnesota, one look at her and you would swear she was a native Southern California girl. Most impressive to a native New Yorker, who is constantly reminded of my nagging East Coast accent that I fear will never leave me, is that she even sounds like she was born and raised in San Diego.

"I got teased all the time when I first came here, so I worked hard to tone down the accent." Apparently, she did a great job of it. Terri moved here in 1995 when her then boyfriend popped the question and along with it a suggestion that they leave Minnesota and move to San Diego.

Terri's life had been quite a challenge up until this point. Pregnant at 17, Terri was carried away with the romantic fantasy of the perfect little family living together and raising their beautiful little daughter and living happily ever after. Protesting parents were told that they were in love and that would make everything fine. This soon turned into the reality of being a teenager trying to take care of a baby with an alcoholic, abusive husband.

Terri's perfect image was wiped away, and after many failed attempts to leave she

finally did for good and decided for her and her daughter's sake she needed to go back to school and move on with her life. Terri enrolled at the University of Minnesota and was on her way to a better life for herself and her daughter.

It was a camping trip organized by a college classmate that led Terri to meet the love of her life and the man who would six years later drive her and her daughter to their new location in sunny San Diego. "1995 was a very eventful year. Matt and I got married, moved to California, and bought a house. Coming to California was one of the best things I have done in my life."

This young mom was in her last year of college when she married and moved to San Diego, intent on completing her degree she registered at San Diego State and graduated Cum Laude with a finance degree. “At the time I thought I wanted to be a financial planner, but before long I decided that this was not the career for me. I ended up taking a job at Park Terrace Medical Associates, now known as Arch Health Partners Medical Group in Poway, where I worked as a Financial Analyst." Although Terri loved the company, she soon realized that working in a cubicle all day as a financial analyst just wasn't for her, but she remained there for four years and learned a lot in her position. Enough to know that she had interest in the insurance field, and

Our 10th Anniversary Women of Distinction so when a friend suggested Terri come work for Farmers where she could diversify and sell home, auto, and health insurance, she figured it was worth a try.

“I soon realized that although I hated selling home and auto insurance, I loved selling health insurance, so I decided I wanted to go out on my own and do just that.

I took, what I refer to as the ‘Summer of Terri.' I started a website, joined networking groups, obtained additional insurance licenses and by about 2006 I was ready to start my own insurance business selling health insurance.”

As a small business, I did what most small business owners do, I had to learn a lot on my own, which meant I made a lot of bad mistakes, but I learned from them all, and after about a year I could make my own car payment.

A few years after that I was able to hire my first part-time employee, then a full-time employee, then another fulltime employee, then another one." Terri then decided it was time to shake things up a bit and take on more responsibility. She felt such a close connection to her Medicare clients that Terri decided to become a Medicare Field Marketing Organization. This would allow her to provide training and plan information to agents with her company who would sell Medicare exclusively. These would be external agents who were independent producers.”

Terri Yurek Insurance has been providing health

insurance solutions to San Diegans for nearly twenty years now. This past January Terri decided that something was lacking in the business and as a result, our seniors were finding themselves in trouble when it came to their health insurance needs.

"What most people do is when they get close to their Medicare eligibility age is they go onto the internet and sign up. They don’t understand the differences in the various plans. There are just so many different caveats when selecting the right Medicare health insurance that it becomes a perplexing situation, like a fork in the road. They must keep in mind whether or not they currently have health insurance, and if so, what type of Medicare will best coordinate with what they have. They also need to know which plan will let them keep their current doctors and cover the prescriptions that they are taking. If they are in need of physical therapy, infusion therapy or other specialized treatments they must be sure that the plan they select allows for visits at their preferred facility at the most favorable member cost sharing. They also need to be aware when they should disenroll in a current plan to be eligible for their new Medicare plan.” My eyes were rolling back in my head thinking of all the possible ways that someone new to Medicare could get it wrong, and end up with plenty of out of pocket expenses. I was relieved when Terri told

me about Medicare Central, the new company within a company that they launched this past January.

Terri explains, “At Medicare Central, we partner with Medical Groups, Employers, HR Administrators, and Retirement Professionals to provide educational seminars and enrollment services that are designed to educate and prepare individuals for the Medicare program.

Our portfolio of customized lecture series delivers up to date, inclusive details that are intended to meet the unique criteria of most eligibility situations. Unlike many seminars that you will see offered - we do not steer, or attempt to steer, consumers toward a specific plan or a limited number of plans and we provide non-biased information about the Medicare Program."

After Terri explained to me what Medicare Central does, I couldn't help but wonder why anyone would attempt to tackle this confusing task on their own, without the kind of help that they provide. "Since we don't promote or benefit from these seminars, those who attend can feel secure in the fact that we are simply an educational platform for those about to make these important long-term Medicare decisions.”

This is a service that Terri Yurek insurance provides that does not lead directly back to a sale for her company but is done as a service to the community. Terri's company also offers guidance on what

is available in the market of insurance plans whether you are a business, an individual, have a family, are Medicare eligible, or currently uninsured. Their goal is to help their clients understand the options they have to improve their health and well-being.

Another refreshing fact about Terri Yurek insurance is that they have a multicultural staff who can help explain these benefits to those who do not speak English as their primary language. "We don't have all nationalities yet, but we are working on it. Our primary concern, when hiring our employees, is that they are honest and upfront with our clients, abide by rules of compliance and be proud of it. Our agents and employees need to be able to talk about the advantages and disadvantages of any policy in which you might have interest. I believe that if you are honest with people they respect that, and they will stay with you as their agent because they trust you. It’s not about lining your pocket it’s about karma.

Do the right thing, and the money will follow."

Terri Yurek Insurance does the majority of their FREE Medicare seminars from September through December, which is the Medicare annual election period. If you are about to become eligible for Medicare visit their site at www.terriyurekinsurance.com and click on their events tab to find an upcoming seminar.

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Straight Talk WHO IS IT GOING TO BE TODAY?

W Have Something to Share?

Straight Talk is an open forum for our Writers & Readers to express their opinions. We will print these opinion pieces with or without your byline per your request.

We look forward to hearing from you.

The opinions expressed within Straight Talk are not necessarily the opinions of San Diego Woman Magazine.

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HO WOULD HAVE thought that Harvey Weinstein’s sexual philandering would have caused the apparent domino effect that is permeating our airwaves?

Every new day brings a new allegation by someone in power in our government, our news media, the entertainment industry, large corporations and the like.

There are several common threads to these reported accounts of sexual harassment.

However, before we explore this subject any further, I would like to give you the accepted definition of sexual harassment according to the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission: “It is unlawful to harass a person (an applicant or employee) because of that person’s sex. Harassment can include “sexual harassment” or unwelcome sexual advances, requests for sexual favors, and other verbal or physical harassment of a sexual nature.”

The definition goes on to include "either by men or women," funny thing is I personally have not heard anything about a woman being accused in this foray of sexual harassment charges.

As previously stated there seem to be several common threads to all these alleged charges. First, they seem to be men. Second, these men seem to have some kind of power. Third, these men have been getting away with this kind of behavior for some time. Fourth, these men generally deny the initial charges.

Fourth, it seems that these men had reputations of being inappropriate. Fifth, apparently these men have been protected for years. I could go on, but I assume by now you are beginning to realize that this type of behavior is not new or limited to a very few.

On the contrary, it seems this type of behavior is perva-

By Carol Heath

sive with certain men. These men are in some position of power in various ways. They are either heads of companies, high in the political food chain, or celebrities of some note. The list grows with each passing day; you never know if it is going to be some guy in politics, or running for a political seat of some kind.

Then there are the high-profile entertainment directors, producers, actors, or sports figures. And, in what I consider rather ludicrous, how about all the high-profile newsmen that have been accused and been unceremoniously fired

20 years, this goes for Kevin Spacey, Ben Affleck, Oliver Stone, Al Franken, Michael Halperin, Charlie Rose, Matt Lauer, the list goes on and unfortunately on including Andy Dick, appropriately named.

You may say well there are different degrees of being inappropriate and we shouldn’t categorize these creeps all together. WRONG! A bully is a bully no matter what degree of bulliness (I made up the word) he exhibits. These creeps are just that bullies. They always pick on someone that is either afraid of losing their job, or not

from their jobs. You know, the guys that have been reporting these stories.

The sad thing is this kind of behavior has been going on for years, and the powers that be have known about it, but have chosen not to do anything about it. Why? Like so many other things in this world, the bottom line is money, M-O-N-E-Y. Bottom line, these creeps, yes that is what I said, creeps, have been getting away with so many things. Sexual inappropriate behavior is just one example of when you are in power, any kind of power; you can act like a creep with absolutely no consequences whatsoever.

I can already sense the naysayers; you think I'm exaggerating. Consider this, if you will, Weinstein's accusers are now in the high double digits and date back as far as

getting a job; someone that has something to lose, like their reputation; you get the message. It shouldn’t matter if you are in a position of power and are making big bucks for the people that are protecting you, or that ‘uncle’ we knew as a kid.

Ah, I now have your full attention. I challenge you to find a woman, any woman, that has not been sexually harassed at some point in their lives. And, yes that goes back to when you were a child and that special friend of the family may have touched you in your special place. What I am saying people is that this type of behavior no matter where it comes from, is not okay, no matter how minor. It is time for women to stand up and like a famous movie character, say "I am mad as hell, and I am not going to take it anymore!"

Straight Talk THE ACT OF A MADMAN “I

T WAS THE ACT OF pure evil.” I woke up on October 2, 2017, to President Trump saying those words on the television that stays on most of the night in my bedroom. It is now some 2 hours later and that television is still on broadcasting the latest carnage, 57 so far, from that horrific scene in Las Vegas. Those broadcasts are also telling of the brave and fast reaction of concert goers and first responders that were on the scene enjoying the concert, working the event, including dozens of ex-military, that jumped into action.

It is unfathomable to try and imagine what some 22,000 people must have felt, thought, or experienced once they realized that the pops and cracks they heard was gunfire and not fireworks, that most thought originally.

Interviews are coming on now; an off-duty Los Angeles firefighter talking about using a table as a stretcher carrying a body and realizing that body was dead. A local off-duty deputy sheriff speaking of just trying to keep people calm and leading them to safety. A woman

relaying a story of how she opened the doors of her van and 6 people piled in; she quickly followed the path to a local hospital. A woman broke down when she talked about her best friend’s daughter, 18, at a hospital fighting for her life. The most gut wrenching for me was a quick interview with a young kid, he must have been maybe 15 or 16. He was shirtless and covered with blood.

He told the interviewer that the blood was not his, but people he was trying to help or people he was covering up that were dead. He wanted to cover up the eyes of the victims.

By now the count is 58 dead and 515 injured; they say the number may increase. The governor is now speaking about the heroism of all the first responders giving his condolences to the wives, husbands, fathers, mothers, sisters, brothers, aunts, uncles, cousins, friends, and anyone and everyone affected by this tragedy. At this point, I can’t imagine anyone not affected by this act of ‘pure evil’ as President Trump said. Anyone who loves country and west-

ern music, anyone who has been to Las Vegas, to the Mandalay Hotel, who has stayed on the 32nd floor of that hotel, I’m sure feels even more affected. However, I can’t think of any human, especially an American human, that doesn’t feel some affect from this horrible act.

I’m now watching and writing at the same time. White House press secretary, Sara Sanders, is reading a statement with a very shaky voice.

She is trying to hold it together, but has to pause once to swallow.

Time for questions. It took exactly 2 questions for the press to make this unspeakable act a political issue. I personally loved her response when she pretty much answered with, and I am para phrasing, “this was a time for us to concentrate on the tragedy and pull together as Americans, and not make this a political issue, not now”.

The press isn’t alone in making this accusation, politicians (I won’t name) have held press conferences, tweeted and instagramed the same thing. The sign of the times I fear. It isn’t bad enough that some

madman decided to hold up in a hotel room, 32 floors above his victims, and let a barrage of bullets rain down on his victims. No, there are some that have to further the negativity that is already so obvious to many. Can we just take a minute and think about all the loved ones dealing with the news that someone they loved is gone. Think about it, they didn’t get to say, I’m proud of you for the last time. I miss you and see you soon for the last time. Thank you for the last time. I love you for the last time. (Personally, this is why I always say I love you as part of my good bye to anyone I love.)

Not everything is negative news coming from this tragedy. Stories are being broadcasted now of acts of heroism.

Off duty police shielding perfect strangers with their bodies from the gunman’s bullets. A husband shielding his wife and giving up his life for hers. A woman huddling in a corner protecting a child she didn’t even know. Ex-military jumping into action guiding people to safety while bullets are flying over their heads, over their shoulders. Dozens of off-duty first responders from other states carrying bodies with make

shift stretchers and acting as triage units.

Dozens and dozens of concert goers picking up victims in their cars and trucks and transporting them to hospitals. These are the stories we should be pushing, not what the present government should have done to prevent this tragedy.

Using this terrible incident politically or any other way is unconscionable, however I am going to do just that. I hope that this tragedy can bring us together as a nation to stop all the negativity that is constantly being hurled at us by the media on television, radio, on social media and people in general. I am saddened to even consider this, that it would take something this horrible, to make people sit up and take notice. We have become so jaded with negativity that I think people have forgotten that we still live in the greatest nation on this planet. That we still have freedoms that most nations can’t even imagine. That we live in a nation that protects us on our shores from other nations who would like to see us succumb to their way of life. That we live in a country where we can say and do pretty much whatever we want.

This often times goes unnoticed by so many. I lived in a country where if you even implied in a negative way anything about the leaders you could be arrested and never be seen again.

I’m 77 years old and I can remember when the news was the news and not the political agenda of the broadcaster. I can

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Straight Talk remember when we were considered by almost everyone on the planet to be the nation most wanted to emulate. I can remember when you could actually have a conversation with a neighbor, a friend, a family member about politics that didn’t end the relationship. I can remember when we all respected the police. I can remember when award shows were about awards and not a venue for some over paid celebrity to make his or her political statement. I can remember when a football player would never ever think of disrespecting the flag.

I can remember so many things, but this article is limited in the number or words it contains. It’s easy to point fingers, but from my perspective, I blame the media, both broadcast and social.

I blame the entertainment industry, which include tv, movies, sporting events, for always promoting the negative and not enough positive. I believe it just fuels the unhappiness of others that feel their wants or needs are not being met.

In concluding this article, I have to say these are my opinions and not that of San Diego Woman’s magazine. Please don’t let this event change the way we live, that is what ultimately the perpetrators of such acts want. Remember, we still live in the land of the free and the brave.

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THEIR AUNTS LOVED THEM,

AS MUCH AS THEY HATED THEM

by Maggie Ramos

F

AR, FAR AWAY LILY can narrowly hear the echo of a voice asking her to come back.

Lily recalls, how she had left the conference room in which they were practicing to become facilitators and co-facilitators in order to offer support groups for children in need. Lily remembers how she ran out towards the back door not knowing where she was headed. On the other side, she came across a steep set of stairs in which she sat at the bottom of the last couple of steps.

It seemed as if her body had become numbed and had unconsciously begun to disconnect. Lily's spirit had also began to wonder off without a clear direction. From a far distance she can hear the echo of a voice, “come back!, come back! You need to come back from wherever you are! There is a big exit sign in front of you”. The professional counselor in charge of the seminar insisted as she forced Lily's head up, supporting it from her chin and redirecting her eye sight towards an exit sign. The counselor, physically shook up her body, and with persistence she successfully brought Lily back to awareness.

Little did Lily know was that during the training she would re-experience part of her childhood that had been hidden in the deepest archives.

For many years, her mind had chosen to forget an unbearable part of her life.

As a child her older sister Daisy, had been learning sexual practices from family members.

At least a couple of her father's relatives, had sexually grasped away her innocence when she was between five or six years old. Lily, being a year younger than her sister; she was often left alone with Daisy, her older sister.

While Daisy kept an eye on Lily; Lily, soon became her outlet each time she

had the chance and at any corner of the house in which Daisy would have the opportunity to. Daisy began to sexualy practice with her sister Lily like a ragged doll everything their aunts had been habitually doing to Daisy for a very long time.

Growing up their aunts always seemed to have Lily as their favorite niece and they apparently loved and liked her more than they liked the Daisy. Their aunts always claimed that the Daisy had become mommy's girl and the Lily was daddy's right hand. Something that for odd reasons made them proud. At least that's what they had the youngest one believe as a kid. They were their

father's sisters, so being their favorite niece, in a way that made Lily feel good.

During the training at the seminar, Lily's brain recalled everything it had chosen to block out for many years. From that day on she understood, why her and Daisy; her older sister had never been able to get along. It was something her parents didn't understand either.

Of course, they were not aware of the damage their father's sisters had caused.

With time, Lily learned that professional counseling was a route for her to seek help from. After the awakening during her early 20’s, Lily began taking therapy, and still does.

Now when she shares her story, she does not feel shameful anymore to say that therapy has been a big part of her healing process. Lily has been able to overcome part of the damage that hate and love have caused her.

Lily realizes that she can not say if the flashbacks will ever go away or if the triggers will ever stop, but she is certain that attending professional therapy sessions have assisted her to comprehend many things she hadn't before. Therapy has helped to bring her much closer to her immediate family members. Lily has learned to live, love and respect them in a healthier manner. She became more open about different topics, especially with her mother. Lily also learned that their is a fitted therapist out there for each one who is in need

of help. Even if it takes a few before you find the right one and most important it has taught herself to forgive her sister, Daisy and accept that not everything was her sister's fault. Her sister at the time was also just a kid being taken advantage of.

As for Lily, she can share that internally she also learned to forgive herself for something that had never been her fault.

She was able to let go of the guilt and shame she lived with for at least the first thirty years of her life.

Everyday is a stepping stone that brings them closer of accepting and learning how to heal and leave this experience in the past, if it is not brought back up to help others.

If you are one of many out there experiencing abuse, I suggest you speak up and seek help.

If you are afraid to share with your parents like Lily was; find someone you can trust. Identify yourself in some way with a friend, professor or a mentor.

Someone you can trust.

Lily understands it is hard to trust anybody after being taken advantage of. But once you find that person everything in your life will begin to fall into place.

Now Lily is grateful and appreciative of those around her that have helped her in many shapes and forms. Lily has become who she is, not only because of her past experiences but because of those special people who have been part of her journey and she respects, admires and looks up to.

Lily expresses, that now she is an aunt, and loves her dear nephews to death, but not near as much as she would ever hate them.

Straight Talk

Who is Running the Asylum?

T

HREE WEEKS INTO THE controversy Roger Goodall, the NFL Commissioner, finally released a statement concerning the actions of many football players. Unless you have been in seclusion the past few months, I would venture to say that you are aware of the actions of some. These players have decided to take a knee, lock arms, hold up fists, whatever their chosen vehicle, during the playing of the National Anthem. Mr. Goodall’s statement is yet another cop out and really doesn’t take a stand on this issue one way of the other. He intimates the league is sympathetic to the players and says next week at the owner’s meeting the issue will be discussed.

Before I write another word, I had to decide whether I would write a prelude or a caveat to this article; I decided on a prelude. I am old school brought up in a very traditional Italian family. My grandparents immigrated from Italy and spent time on Ellis Island before being allowed to walk on the streets of New York.

They worked hard, raised their children, and instilled in them what a privilege it was to be able to live and breathe in the United States. My grandfather was animate about 2 things, love and respect; they went hand in hand as far as he was concerned. You loved your family and you respected them along with anybody older than you, policeman, fireman, teachers, the list goes on, but I think you get the idea. My grandfather loved the United States and I can remember when I was about 4 years old, when he showed me how to stand at attention and hold my hand over my heart to honor the flag of his adopted country.

Okay, now you know I may be biased, nonetheless I know a lot of Americans that feel the way I do about disrespecting the flag or the National Anthem. Now here comes the best part, most of these players don’t even know what they are protesting. They can’t seem to make up their minds and it keeps changing from week to week. I’ve read various articles that have stated they are protesting police brutality, the inequality of races, the government, and President Trump. Make up your minds boys, what is it.

It seems that the actions of one 3rd string quarterback has become the actions of many. I think the NFL underestimated the reaction of their fan base. I also think the owners are afraid to make any statements. Jerry Jones, who owns the Dallas Cowboys, came out and told his players they will stand for the playing of the anthem. He is getting flak from all sides.

When is the last time you had a job and the owner told you to do something and you protested for the whole world to see.

I don’t think you would have that job very long.

Ratings have plummeted the last few weeks on television. The attendance at games have fallen drastically. Maybe the league is getting the message and that is why Goodall made his weak statement.

When Kaepernick took a knee at a 49er home game last year I was personally appalled. When the owners or the league didn’t make a statement, I began boycotting watching the 49ers on television. I had been a niner fan and previous season ticket holder for many years. When I say many, I can remember sneaking under the fence at Kezar to watch a game.

The bottom line is this, according to some reporters, they say there is nothing in the leagues by laws or in a player’s contract that they are required to stand during the anthem.

However, according to other announcers and radio hosts there is a paragraph saying just that. One tv host even showed the league contract that is used and it clearly states they will stand during the anthem.

Some players are being quoted as saying “The owners and the league don’t really care about us or our feelings.” Hey buddy you are playing a game, it is a game not brain surgery.

You are getting paid some 6

The opinions expressed within Straight Talk are not necessarily the opinions of San Diego Woman Magazine.

figures or more to play that game. So, if your boss says you are going to stand, you better stand. He pays you to stand, he doesn’t have to care about your feelings. So put on your big boy pants and suck it up.

This is not the venue for you to make a statement by kneeling during the anthem no matter what your protest may be. Lots of people buy tickets to watch you play the game. If you want to make a statement you make enough money to buy a venue in which to do so.

In fact, get all your buddies who make as much money as you do, who also protested, and you can buy out several stadiums and make your protest.

Do I sound passionate, you bet your booty I am. I worked for a professional sports team for over 20 years. During that time, I saw lots of spoiled, over protected athletes in every sport. These guys were treated like gods from the time they were discovered to have athletic ability of some kind. Some of them from the time they entered high school. They expect special treatment no matter where they go. They say and do things without ever having to pay the consequences.

I would be willing to bet most of the guys locking arms and kneeling don’t even know what is going on in the world.

How we have lost the respect of other nations because of people like them. People who say and do things that are unthinkable to the vast majority of Americans. I’m not saying all, I learned a long time ago that’s a lot of people, but most of the players are clueless. They are overpaid, spoiled brats that need to grow up and see how the rest of us live.

25

Our 10th Anniversary Women of Distinction

W

HEN I ARRIVED AT Financial Advisor, Deana Carter's office, the place was buzzing. The buzz was not due to the usual reason, clients with appointments waiting to meet with their advisor; there was actually a different reason for the mayhem.

Time was coming close to Deana’s deadline for her annual Feed the Troops Drive.

Not the nationally recog-

the opportunity to study comparative economics at Oxford University in England. When she completed college, she realized that her organization and math skills would be better put to use in the financial planning field.

"It was actually November of 1992 when I was offered a position as a financial advisor, exactly 25 years ago. The job itself happened to be a perfect fit for me. I

ing those who don't have high bank balances because I can educate them along the way."

Education is so essential to Deana that she is currently working on a book which will answer many fundamental questions that clients might be embarrassed to admit they do not know.

“We have had many women come in for appointments who either due to the

Deana Car ter

A FINANCIAL MIND AND A HEART OF GOLD

By Judith A. Habert Photo courtesy of Deana Carter

nized organization, but one she puts together on her own with the help of friends and clients. People stopped by with checks, food items and gift cards to add to this wonderful cause that is instrumental in ensuring our service men, women and their families do not go without during the holiday season. This is but only one of the many selfless endeavors Deana participates in on a regular basis all year long.

Deana has been serving the Rancho Santa Fe and surrounding communities as a Financial Planner for over twenty years, a career she did not initially set out to pursue. A native San Diegan, Deana attended college to obtain a degree in civil engineering so she could embark on a career as a structural engineer.

At USD she was studying economics and was offered

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felt I could assist people more by helping them build for their future, instead of building buildings." After a pause, I said, "Good move?" Deana smiled at me from behind her desk in downtown Rancho Santa Fe and quickly responded "Oh, yes. A very good move!"

One of the many things I admire about Deana is that she is wide open when it comes to the clientele she manages. She manages both CEO’s, wealthy individuals in their own right, but she also has clients who are simply putting away $100 a month to assure that their children can attend college.

"Often I will work with an entire firm. Everyone from the owners to the clerical staff. I take great joy in helping all of them prepare for their future and helping them reach their financial goals. I get a lot of joy help-

death of their husband or divorce, finding themselves in a position where they have to manage their own money. For many, this is something they have never done before, and they are terrified. It is often a hand holding process where I sit someone down and walk them through the many options they have and explain the benefits and drawbacks of the choices available.

My upcoming book will be a guide to basic financial knowledge, which I will provide to any client in a similar position." Besides the book, Deana offers frequent seminars to help educate clients and potential clients. One of her most popular ones is, "Picture Your Prosperity," which teaches attendees to see their financial goals, both immediate and long-term, then set the plan to attain

these goals.

One of the questions I have personally wondered was the age one should start saving for the future.

So, I posed the question to Deana. Her response surprised me, "You should start saving for your future at age 25." I was a bit shocked by this response, but when she showed me the specifics, I understood why she felt this way. She explained, “If you start saving $100 a month at age 25, and earn on average of 5% annually, at age 65 you will have $154,000. If you wait until age 35 and save $100 a month, earning on average 5% annually, you will have saved $84,000. If you wait until age 35 and start saving $200 a month, double the above, at 5%, it will only grow to $117,000.

This is how ‘compounding interest’ works. This is why we say, ‘the earlier, the better’ when it comes to planning for your future.”

I had to ask my favorite questions of our expert.

What are some special tips you could provide for our readers on financial health?

Deana's suggestions included the following: Pay yourself first- Put a small amount of money aside each month in a separate account that is just for you. This is whether you are single, married, divorced or widowed. You need to have your own source of money.

Be knowledgeable- Read or take courses, but find a way to educate yourself on the basics of investing and financial planning.

Have three buckets of investments- The first bucket is your emergency

What I Really Want Is................ reserve, the second is for your 7-10 year goals, and the third one is for your retirement. Try to fill all of those buckets. So, the first bucket is for that potential car repair emergency, the second might be for the house or boat you want to buy or trip you have dreamed of taking, and the third bucket would be for your longterm retirement savings Be wary of promises of high returns- As the saying goes, "If it looks too good to be true, it probably is." So be happy with consistent smaller returns, which don't put your life savings at risk. If you want to gamble with some "cocktail stocks" make sure you do so with money that you can afford to lose.

When all is said and done the most important thing is knowledge and consistency when it comes to financial health. Deana adds a final thought "Many people spend more time planning for a vacation then they do for their retirement. This is an issue that needs to change.

People have to realize how important it is to be prepared for a time when they no longer can, or want to work. The thing to always keep in mind is that ‘There is no time like the present to plan for the future.'"

By Debbie Storms

H

APPINESS IS UNDERstood by most of the world’s population. Our most basic instinct is the search for happiness. The holidays are a magical time, but they become filled with stress. We want the gifts of joy, love and compassion for ourselves and others. Happiness will elude you if you don’t remember, happiness is an inside job.

Forget how you think the holidays should be. Keep an open mind and celebrate your traditions in a wonderful way. As your family and friends change create new traditions which have more meaning and bring you happiness. Forget about how the holidays should be.

Create your own brand!

Prioritizing is a great way to stay balanced.

Matching your efforts with the amount of time you have will alleviate stress from your life. The value of a checklist is the first gift to yourself.

The tech world has given us a zillion gadgets to make organizing our lives simpler.

Make your entries complete the first time and you’ll save

time later. Take advantage of all the sales in the next few months to keep track of your must-dos and free up space in your head to think of things you enjoy doing .

Happiness is about taking care of yourself.

Don’t shortchange yourself of precious sleep and with all the rushing around, the first thing that many of us let slide is exercise. Look for gaps in your schedule and take a walk. Take a break and meditate or catch a nap. The benefit is for a good reason: you will boost your alertness and productively. Always make things fun, after all, you owe it to yourself.

Over the holidays it is easy to feel like “I have to do it all!” Tis the season to ask for help. Distribute the holiday tasks: you’ll keep your sanity and people around you will get in the mood to celebrate.

Remember the holidays are a festive time, full of excitement, parties and events.

Know when to say, “no.”

Think about your time, emotional energy, and financial output and choose wisely.

You do not have to make it the season of obligations.

It can be easy to just go crazy and buy something for everyone you know. Be completely honest with yourself about what you can afford to spend. Create your gift giving list after you know how much you have to spend and shop wisely.

Don’t stress finding a special gift for the hard-to-please, consider making a charitable donation in her or his name. In most cases the charity sends a holiday card to the person letting them know of your contribution.

With a few sanity saving tips, you’ll be happy and bright this holiday season and into the New Year.

Festive is defined as having or producing happy and enjoyable feelings suitable for a special occasion.

Let’s keep in the spirit of the holidays and share feelings of pleasure and happiness.

Wishing you a happy and sane holiday! That is what I really want....

Let me know what you have in mind. dstorms88@ gmail.com

If you would like to find out more information visit Deana's site at www.Carterfinancial.biz.

To make an appointment or speak directly with Deana email her at deana.carter@LPL.com or call her at 858 756 1566.

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Holiday Gift Guide

The

Perfect Gift H

EY LADIES, CHRISTmas is around the corner and I’d just like to give you a quick tutorial on how to pick the perfect gift just for you. Maybe you never got an engagement ring, maybe you need a magnifying glass to

see the diamond in your original engagement ring. I’m here to tell you it is time, you deserve this, you want this.

Time to come right out and tell you husband, significant other, you deserve to have a diamond on your finger.

Not just any diamond,

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but a diamond ring you design! It’s going to be on your finger, so why not have some input.

No more slippers, night gowns, the latest kitchen gadget, you want diamonds!

This little tutorial is an 8-step process that you can share with your son someday. That day will be here sooner than you want. This can actually be a bonding experience for the men in your life, as ultimately, they will be responsible to buy you that perfect present. Better yet, you don’t have a husband or a son, you have 2 daughters, time to teach them the importance of diamonds being a girl’s best friend.

Step 1 Set your budget Be realistic, don’t go cheap this is for you and you deserve it. But you don’t want to feel like you have to take out a second on the house.

Step 2 Ring size You most likely know your ring size, but if you don’t, it is very easy to go to a jeweler and measure your finger.

Step 3 Choose a jeweler.

This step is vitally important. You may know a jeweler already. You may consider a jeweler on line, the important thing is, you must be able to communicate with him honestly and in a straightforward manner. Hint: you will pay 20-30% more if you go to the mall and chances are you won’t be able to design that one of a kind ring.

Step 4 Guarantees and Warranties Similar to how cars have titles and registration, diamonds and gemstones have grading reports. It is imperative that the diamond you choose comes complete with a grading certificate.

Step 5 Design the ring Think about the anatomy of the ring, the setting, the band, the cut of the diamond.

This is the fun part, as you communicate with your jeweler, he will give some suggestions. There are so many parts to a ring, just like there are

so many parts to you.

If you have no idea what style or cut of diamond you want, your jeweler should be a certified gemologist and he will be able to help you with the design.

Look at pictures, maybe a friend’s ring, just make sure the design is something you want and not something you are settling for, remember you deserve this.

Step 6 Select a diamond or diamonds Diamonds are rated by the Gemological Institute of America or the GIA. GIA reports provide a full description of the diamond, including color, weight, measurements, cutting style, and disclose any known treatments. There requirements meet very high standards. Make sure you get a full report with your diamond from the GIA. Step 7 Get insurance You are almost an expert by now, so you should insure your purchase with the peace of mind that in case something happens to

your one of a kind ring.

Take several pictures of your ring, the receipt for the ring, a copy of the GIA report and take it to your insurance agent.

He/she will take it from there.

Step 8 Care & Maintain You wouldn’t think of buying a car without getting it serviced every 3,000 miles. You have just purchased an expensive piece of jewelry and it needs care and some maintenance.

You can soak your ring in dish soap and water to clean it and every 6 months a trip to your jeweler for a deep cleaner is a good idea.

This 8-step tutorial was suggested by Nick Miller, CEO of Mint Diamonds in Houston, Texas. Mint Diamonds is an online full-service jewelry store. Their customer care is top notched and you can actually design your ring with different programs on your computer. Best part no charge for this service and their designers are super creative.

Pet is a term which has been erased from popular vernacular. The more common names for our dogs these days include Fur Baby, Son, Daughter, Snookums, Boo Boo, and other disgustingly adorable words. Can you remember the last time you called Fido by his birth given name? I can’t.

Personally, I’ve turned my beautifully named MOCHA (a Red Fawn French Bulldog for those inquiring minds) into MO MO, Mokey Bear, Chicken Nugget, MO MO LICIOUS and just about everything except that REAL name. So why is it that we find ourselves searching Webster's dictionary for any term OTHER than what we ourselves chose for our animals? It's simple; we love them.

This level of love for our four-legged friends doesn't just end at our verbiage. Educated pet owners now realize that the food that their parents fed the family dog was far from ideal.

Ethoxyquin, a common preservative in dog foods, was originally developed as an herbicide.

This ingredient has been linked to kidney failure, cancer, and liver damage in canines. Butylated-hydroxyanisole (BHA) or butylated hydroxytoluene (BHT) are equally potent and dangerous

for your pet and have also made their way into your dog dish. Used as a preservative to help prevent food spoilage, BHA and BHT are directly associated with cancer and kidney damage. These harsh chemicals that make the cut for animal feed in the United States are banned in other countries. Realizing this massive shortcoming in FDA guidelines, many pet parents began cooking for their animals at home.

for dogs. With a single objective of increasing the quality and length of life for as many dogs as possible through a balanced whole food diet, JUST FOOD FOR DOGS opened the world’s first Pet Kitchen! Customers visiting their store locations can WATCH as a fresh batch of “Chicken and Wild Rice” or “Salmon and Sweet Potato” is cooked in front of their own eyes. From the slicing of each breast of chicken to the mixing

Only the Best!

By Jaime Tori Habert Photos courtesy of JFFD Now, I consider myself a pet chef extraordinaire, but Mocha thinks otherwise.

After becoming quite unimpressed with my critically acclaimed "Chicken-a-la-Boiled," and "Beef-a-la-Grilled," Mocha's elevated palate called for some nutritionally sound and equally delicious gourmet eats. Luckily, the culinary Gods dropped JUST FOOD FOR DOGS into our laps just in the nick of time.

JUST FOOD FOR DOGS is a company dedicated and built on the premise of making fresh, healthy, wholesome food readily available

of broth into the recipe, you have the security of knowing this isn't your mother's dog food facility. Once a batch is completed, it is packed and frozen to maintain its freshness. With home delivery of all of their pet products, from veterinarian approved natural supplements to the ever-popular beef liver bark and dried chicken tenders, it’s no wonder JUST FOOD FOR DOGS is exploding in popularity amongst quality conscious consumers.

So what’s on the menu? If you’re looking for the staples, here are their meal options for pups:

• Beef & Russet Potato • Lamb & Brown Rice • Turkey & Whole Wheat Macaroni • Venison & Squash • Chicken & Wild Rice For the holidays, JUST FOOD FOR DOGS has a way for your fur baby to feel engaged in the festivities, a limited release recipe of Turducken! Don’t feel like any of these options are exactly what your pet needs? JFFD specializes in CUSTOM diets, designed and cooked to order based on your pup’s nutritional needs and preferred tastes.

Does Fido have dermatological issues or struggle with hip and joint function? JUST FOOD FOR DOGS provides veterinarian counseled diets specifically formulated to treat your pet’s health problems.

The genius behind such innovation is Shawn Buckley. When he investigated the ingredients in his own dogs' food, he found a laundry list of by-products, preservatives, and toxic chemicals; not to mention the fact that most foods were cooked at such a high temperature that it killed all nu-

tritional value. Because of this eye-opening information, Shawn decided he would never feed his dogs commercial food again and began on his quest to create a company based on honesty. This honesty led him to assemble a team of even more knowledgeable veterinarians, nutritionists, and chefs to develop the recipes we have the pleasure of receiving today.

Ready to order a meal plan for your lil snookums? Visit any of their store locations (Del Mar for those of us proudly deemed San Diegans) or go online now at https://www.justfoodfordogs.com/ to begin a journey of health that will elongate the life of your pet while bringing the much-needed convenience of simply defrosting nutritionally sound food for your pride & joy.

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B I T C H I N

&

M O A N I N G

I Don’t Want to Grow Up… or Do I?

By Judith A. Habert

What Can I Possibly Say? We were strangers when we were brought together to work on a new project, starting a Women's Magazine in San Diego. It only took a few short meetings, and we became fast friends, then best friends and confidants. We have remained so for over ten years. We have been through life changes, new babies, new homes, three am deadlines, illnesses, heartbreak, losses, happy hours and some very sad tears. Through it all, we have remained best friends.

As sad as I am to see my Best Friend Sonali Soni move on from her position as Art Director with San Diego Woman Magazine, I cannot help but stand up and cheer for the wonderful accomplishment.

Sonali has recently opened her own studio. Sonali is finally able to celebrate her talent and shine the light on the beautiful being that I have had the pleasure of relying on for bringing beauty to the pages of San Diego Woman Magazine for the past ten years. Thank you Sonali, I am forever grateful to have you in my life and call you my friend.

You Go Girl!!!

Check out Sonali’s new studio at http://www.sonalidesignstudio. com/studios.html Call for more information or to register for a class at 858 354 5365

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I’ve made a decision. Being a grownup sucks. I've been one now for forty years, but like everything else in life, you kind of get used to horrendous treatment by those around you and you don't even realize how bad the treatment is until you get a glimpse into how it used to be. It is a very little person who was the catalyst to my newest revelation, my nine-month-old granddaughter Adelaide Francesca (Addy for short).

That’s probably the first plus to being an infant, cute nicknames. No one recently has come up to me and crowned me with an adorable new nickname. I was Judy growing up, Judith as I grew up, Judith Ann Jacqueline Patti when I was summoned for doing something wrong around the house. I had a few nicknames presented to me as a child, one was Judy in the Sky with Diamonds due to the Famous Beatles song and let's not forget, Judy Blue Eyes, thanks to Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young (even

though mine were brownish green).

Then, of course, the older folks loved to call me "Judy, Judy,Judy” after the classic Cary Grant line, but my favorite was Joopy, by my close friend Claire, who I was kidnapped with, but that’s an entirely different story. She called me Joop or Joopy for years and one year presented me with a bottle of perfume. I thought I would fall on the floor when it said Joop as the name of it on the label.

It didn’t belong to me it was just a silly coincidence. But now that I think about it, there were some nicknames early on, some of them not very nice.

As a chubby little girl I was victim to a sir name that made me an easy target for those super mean middle school boys, and yes, you guessed it, a certain classmate, whose name I remember more than four decades later. His name was Richard Lang, and he started the chorus one year at the beginning of the school year and yes forever more in middle school I was known as "Judy Fatty Patti." Wait, did I say I didn't want to grow up? Damn, I take that back. That was several years of pure hell. At this age, people may think mean things, but they have sense enough to talk behind your back and not say it to your face.

Okay, maybe what I want is to go back in time to those preschool years, when everyone wants to hold you, smile at you and tell the grown-ups around you how cute you are. Yeah, that would work, or maybe I will just take solace in the fact that I survived those horrible years and now just enjoy being grandma to a little girl who I am told is really cute, and I couldn't agree more.

S

HE MAY BE TINY, but she has the spirit and determination of a giant. At just 11 years of age Natalia (Nini) Hodge, an avid equestrian, has won more honors than many win in lifelong careers. Nini competes at all levels of horse shows local and out of state. She has made quite a name for herself over the last 4 years appearing in various magazines and news articles and even on television. She has won awards and ribbons as well as the prestigious High Point award for Reserve Rider of the year.

Her wins include first place in the regionals in Santa Barbara, she won Grand Champion and English pleasure and received an award from Brian Maienschein for being an outstanding youth in the community. One of her most memorable wins was at the Oklahoma Morgan World Championship horse show where she took reserve World champion for the 2nd year in a row she was voted 2nd best in the world, the Morgan Grand National and World Championship is the biggest show of the year bringing Morgan owners and competitors from all over. On the local level she has won over 20 grand championships as well as over 50 championship titles. She loves what she does and balances

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Incredible Kids of San Diego it with exceptionally high academics.

Her dedication becomes evident when her mom, Pam Hodge, shares her schedule, “Nini is up every morning at 430 am.

We live in Poway so it takes time to drive to Escondido so she can train from 6 am to 7 am. Once there she gets her horse ready, they take their ride and then she cleans her tack and horse, puts him away and we head back to Poway by 8 am so she can be at school where she attends class until 230 every day. Nini is in the GATE program and has tested in the top 4% academically in the nation.”

On March 1st 2016 the county of San Diego California took formal notice of this amazing young woman and proclomated that day as Nini Hodge day in assemblywoman Dianne Jacobs office, more recently Nini was awarded the American Morgan Horse Youth Achievement award that was presented

to her at the Morgan Horse convention in Riverside California. In Febuary 2017 Assemblyman Brian Maienschein awarded Nini with 2 State of California Certificates for all her accomplishments.

Nini has been an officer in her Morgan

horse youth club now for 3 years and helps direct the creative aspect of the club. Her trainer Ann Miller of Miller Equestrian has been training her for almost 4 years now and has also produced multiple world champions from her barn.

In her spare time she loves to help the homeless in her community by passing out blankets and hygiene kits as well as visiting with them and helping to feed them.

Nini’s parents are not wealthy people in fact her Dad Bill works 14

Incredible Kids of San Diego

to 15 hour days and her mom works nights for the Poway unified school district and runs an equine therapy ranch on the weekends for autistic kids and at risk youth.

Nini has a brother who is equally as talented as she is his areas of expertise are skateboarding, snowboarding and surfing.

He is 9 years old and is working on sponsorships by some big name skate companies.

Aside from her athletic accomplishments Nini has also written a book called Henry the Horse, the adventures of Nini and Henry ……………It’s

good to show young girls that having a dream requires hard work and dedication in order to be successful.

Nini’s story teaches all the little girls out there that if they love something and are determined to achieve it, dreams do come true.

ge, I'm d o H i in N is e Hi! My nam ay, w o P in e iv l I and 11 years old, gs I in l ib s e iv f e v a California. I h isters, an older er s have three old ger brother. youn a d n a , r e h t o r b on other s e l ic t r a g in I will be writ g people in d n a t s t u o e r children who a go. The ie D n a S f o y in the communit friend, y m is s ie r e s first in my .

Amanda White

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Incredible Kids of San Diego A

MANDA WHITE IS 14 years old, a freshman at Canyon Crest Academy and my friend. She is a member of the Equestrian Club at school and participates in the United States Equestrian Federation (USEF) High School Equestrian Athlete Lettering Program. Amanda lives in Carmel Valley with her

Amanda is like my big sister she's very smart, and she keeps her horse at the same barn where I keep my horse.

Amanda has many talents, she is the fitting and showmanship world champion, which is when a handler and their horse perform patterns in unison in front of a judge and the judge

ever since. At first, I leased a horse for a year; named Festival Sundance, Sunny where we competed in Hunt Seat Equitation and Pleasure and Classic Pleasure Driving at the Morgan Grand National and World Championships. Even though Sunny and I did well, Ann, said that I would need a different

Amanda White, Equestrian

Written by Nini Hodge and Amanda White Photos Courtesy of Amanda White

mother, Sarah, and her dad, Peter, lives in Clairemont.

Amanda started riding at age 8 through the Ecke YMCA camp. The Ecke YMCA has their camp at Miller Equestrian and has a great program for new riders. After her first camp, she was hooked and convinced her Mom to sign her up for other Ecke YMCA camps later that summer.

With camp lessons behind her, she moved up to private and group lessons. Amanda has told me, "I really appreciate all the driving my Mom does to shuttle me from Carmel Valley to Escondido and back; sometimes up to a hundred miles a day and up to 7 days per week. Because I spend a lot of time in the car, I do a lot of homework on the drives and having a Hot Spot helps.

I tried out a few other barns closer to home but always returned to Miller Equestrian because this is where I feel at home."

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bases her or his decision on how well the horse and handler were in sync with each other.

Aside from being a talented Equestrian Amanda gets top-notch grades in school and has several other interests, one which is a love of cooking. She has taken quite a few cooking classes over the last couple of years. Amanda also belongs to FFA which is future farmers of America, and she takes agriculture classes. Her hopes are to one day become a large animal vet.

Amanda’s interest in riding has been growing over the years, “Initially I learned how to ride Saddleseat. In my first few horse shows, I competed in Saddleseat as an Academy Rider. About the time, my mother was going to buy me a saddle and other tack as part of the process of an advancing rider, she said, ‘the minute I buy this saddle, you are going to want to switch to Hunt Seat.' My trainer Ann thought that might not be a bad idea so at my next lesson I tried riding Hunt Seat. Something about it just clicked, and I have been riding Hunt Seat

horse to compete as I advanced to the next division of competition. I was sad not to be able to ride Sunny in competitions anymore, but I knew she was right."

For those of you who might be thinking, what is a Morgan Horse, it is a breed of saddle horses with very special characteristics. The Morgan is a strong horse that can run at fast speeds. It can also go long distances without getting tired. The Morgan is considered a good-natured animal. It is usually good with children and has a kind and willing disposition.

Amanda’s trainer Ann was definitely correct, after selecting her new horse, Qua-Drangle, Cody, Amanda won her first Morgan World Championship.

They went on to win many local and regional championships in Hunt Seat Equitation and Pleasure and Western Pleasure.

And, Amanda was fourth in the Grand National and World Championship Junior Judging competition.”

One of the things I like most about Amanda is that no matter how many championships or awards she wins she still tells me that one of her favorite things is to work at the same camp where she first learned to ride. Amanda shares, “I enjoy teaching new riders. I really like when campers who I worked with in summer camp move on to take more lessons at Miller Equestrian. It is fun to share my love of riding with advancing riders. I also like participating in the school visits where we bring one of the horses and teach students about horses and riding. My goal for this year is to strengthen my relationship with my horse, improve my riding technique, and win the Hunt Seat Equitation World Championship for 14 and 15-year-olds. Eventually, I hope to take my knowledge of horses and become an equine veterinarian."

I’ve Been Good Gift Guide Max Traxxx Tracer Racer This is a gift that will keep your kids busy for hours on end. They will love Max Traxxx Tracer Racer! These racers utilize Light Trail Technology as they blaze streaks of light on Skull-

Sparkle * Kitty We all know how popular board and card games are, and as parents, this is especially great news because less screen time + real human interaction + loads of fun = a win for all! In addition, Sparkle*Kitty embraces individuality and believes

duggery patented Glow-in-the-Dark track. Each Tracer Racer beams down purple light rays from its undercarriage onto track specially engineered to emit glow remnants long after the racer has passed.

How cool is that!

that what makes us different makes us stronger! This is a great concept to teach our children.

Nobody puts princess in a tower!

This is a game that is full of fun and imagination for 3-8 players ages 6+.

You are a princess trapped in a tower, but you’re going to break yourself out! Match

You child will be the envy of the neighborhood if this is under the Christmas tree this year.

What makes it more enjoyable is its versatility. They can choose their track, racers and loops, then take into a dimly lit room and set the darkness ablaze.

These racing sets are perfect for both beginning and advanced race fans.

They come with variable speed remote control cars and adjustable

over 60 magical words to cast silly spell combinations in this fast-paced adorable and fun social game for all ages, sizes, and

track heights allow racers to control course difficulty.

Four Tracer Racers RC Cars available.

genders. With ten princesses in every box, if your princess is the first to escape you win the game.

The game begins with the premise that a group of powerful princesses was captured and locked away in a tower by Queen Sparkle*Kitty!

When this happened, all their words and magic spells vanished and became sugar & spice and almost everything nice.

Luckily these are no ordinary princesses, and YOU are no ordinary players!

Players get to take matters into their own hands, harness the simple and sweet words

Set includes one Tracer Racers, RC Car and one Controller. Available at Amazon, Toys R

Us and www.toysrus.com. More information: www. skullduggery. com/.

into special spell combinations. This game will occupy your children for hours trying to win the game and set their princess free.

The best part is that you won’t find your kids with their faces buried in an electronic gadget.

Go to https:// breakinggames. com/products/ sparkle-kitty to order this great new game.

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I’ve Been Good Gift Guide aGreatLife Toys

was truly amazed by the quality of what I received.

The wooden toys are of the high-

she comes to my home. Even at her young age, she is amused by the fact that she can

make beautiful music so easily.

This is but one of their wonderful items.

They make beautiful kites, the colors are bright and stay that way.

Their slingshots are beautifully carved, handmade with love.

They are classic Y-shaped bear slingshots with a comfortable grip, an essential part of a good slingshot.

They also included wooden wolf whistles, which are also hand carved from solid wood and hand painted making them a joy to use or display.

Let’s not forget their large array of Rubik cube type puzzles including one crowned the Rubik’s Cube on steroids,’ It is a 3D pyramid puzzle incorporating a generation’s

SLEEPOVER PARTY GAME

out with a way to guarantee that our little girls won’t fall asleep, which may not make us Moms happy, but let’s face it, we were young once too, and we know how much fun it was to let everyone know you made it through the whole night.

SLEEPOVER PARTY GAME will be a great

source of joy for your daughter. It has 200 choices of fun things to do during her sleepover. All her friends need to do is spin the spinner, and they will then have to attempt to complete one of over 200 Act it, Work it, or Party Challenges. This game allows the girls to sing, laugh, perform and make

Toys that Bring Families Together Becoming a Grandmother for the first time I have enjoyed every moment spent with my granddaughter. When I was sent samples of some of the items from this great company I

We all remember those fun days of our youth having sleepover parties with our girlfriends. We were always searching for fun things to do to make sure that we didn’t wimp out and fall asleep.

Well, Endless Games has come

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est quality and are meant to be passed on down from sibling to sibling. They will definitely stand the test of time.

My favorite item was the xylophone which my granddaughter loves and looks for every time

worth of ideas into one ultra-portable game that is challenging and will keep the user occupied for hours.

The mission statement of aGreatLife impressed me as well. “aGreatLife toys are designed to combine learning with fun. From Rainbow kites to classic wooden toys like the Xylophone and the Wooden Abacus, to the mind-boggling Speed Cube, aGreatLife wants to provide children with toys that will stimulate their imagination and senses, learn more about the world around them and help them interact with others especially with their parents, siblings, and friends. aGreatLife is strongly commit-

general fools of themselves. They get to be silly and have loads of laughs.

After the party, all they will be doing is talking about how much fun they had and you, mom, will be the hero for giving them this amazing game.

ted to enhance the quality of life by providing beautiful and useful premium products and to help families create strong and priceless memories together. Indeed, it’s a better life with aGreatLife!” I will also add that they ensure their toys with a 100% money back guarantee if for any reason you are not happy with a product that you purchase from them.

These toys promote family togetherness, unlike the electronic gadgets that our kids have their faces buried in all the time.

What is the best part of aGreatLife is that the “Toys” are as much for the grown-up kids as they are for the under 16 crowd.

Take a look at their site at https://agreatlifebrand.com/

So go online to www.endlessgames.com and order SLEEPOVER PARTY GAME today.

R E A D

A N Y

G O O D

B O O K S

Fearless by Kerri Walker Review by Carol Heath Fearless is a no holds barred, unapologetic, part memoir, part guide on how to succeed as an exotic dancer written

by Kerri Walker.

Kerri recounts her journey from the first day she walked into a New Jersey strip joint through nights working in New York nightclubs.

After college Kerri took a job in Europe as an au pair or as she puts it, glorified babysitter. She spent a year exploring the French Alps and fell in love with the laid-back lifestyle.

Kerri vowed she would return to live and speak French like a Frenchman rather than a girl from Jersey. But how? She knew it would take a lot

of money and she didn’t want to wait years before her return to those beautiful alps.

So, like any other red-blooded American girl, she moved in with her parents and began a google search on high paying jobs for 28-year-old women with "babysitting" on their resume.

And the rest of the story is history, Kerri’s history as an exotic dancer. She walks the reader through the steps you should take to become a successful exotic dancer.

She should know, she managed to save $100,000,00 in three years to realize her dream of returning to the alps once again.

If you ever thought of what it would be like to be an exotic dancer, this book not only walks you through each step, but it does so in detail.

Fearless can be used as a guide to the step-bystep approach to becoming a very well paid exotic dancer. Consider this, if you will, you can pick the days you want to work, how many hours a

L A T E L Y ?

Gabriella’s Law

by Angelique

Review by Judith A. Habert week you want to work, where you want to work, how you want to work, sounds pretty good doesn't it? All you have to do is decide you have a great body, find a local strip joint, walk in and dance, easy as that. Oh, I forgot to tell you, along with dancing you have to take off your clothes, at least most of them.

Fearless is a fun and interesting read and one that gives you an inside look at the daily life of an exotic dancer and doesn't just focus on the lurid side of the profession. Pick up a copy today; it will broaden your horizons.

Fearless is available at all online outlets Fearless! An Exotic Dancer's Guide to Personal and Professional Success Released: August 2017 ISBN-10: 1548794899 ISBN-13: 9781548794897

If you had the ability to grant all the people you love their every desire, would you? Even if it meant you would have to give up

your life? A choice you would have to make, but is it your choice?

There are few books which have actually kept me up at night, Gabriella’s Law was one of them. From the very first page, until the very last, I found myself spellbound. I could not put this book down.

Set in a colorful and historical backdrop, the author brings New Orleans so alive through her descriptions that you can almost taste the beignets.

Things get even more intriguing

when she makes acquaintances with some of the colorful locals, who quickly share their secrets with an inquisitive Gabriella.

When relationships heat up Gabriella is forced to make one very difficult choice. As the reader, you can’t turn the pages fast enough, anticipating what Gabriella’s ultimate decision will be.

The writing is fresh, conversational, and fast paced which makes the reader want to read on and on. The only moment of disappointment is when you realize the story is over.

Thank goodness this breakout author has more surprises waiting for you with the sequels to this amazing book. All I can say is Keep them coming!

If you are looking for a great book, with a fresh twist, get a copy of this soon to be Bestseller, Gabriella’s Law. To order a copy today visit the author’s site at www.angeliquethesagesoul. com

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Poetry Corner The Da Nang Gang

October, the official month

We all went over to make the world safe for democracy, Mom's apple pie and of course the American Flag both male and female fought hard and even those in drag

However, the other eleven months are just as bad we have all been touch by this death ray of a disease that our friends and many relatives have had.

By Gerald M. Neff

Some were chosen by a letter from their friends and neighbors and never did stop, for all began at the very very top.

Lots of bloody money to finance those fourteen-long-years that mostly ended in tears.

By Gerald M. Neff

The sad and long dragging torture of, will they, or won’t they, chemo or radiation but in the end, it usually gets them and sometimes the second time around again.

Although not a war, it killed just the same over 100,000 dead and many more maimed.

Walk or run for the cure, to pay for studies and expensive treatments and we pay rather we win or not The investigations on this particular malady are still not going well so, please join the fight and wear a pink bow on your lapel.

These close fellowship, buddies, and friends all excited or even afraid of how their tour of duty finally ends.

For let us beat this pestilence for once and for all we can't let cancer win, so, let’s fight for more than a draw.

This verse could tell of many a green jungle horror and more differences but similar situations with beginnings, middle, and ends; but, it is long ago, and the pain is diminishing for we present, but for some it is all over.

Let’s make this evil presence past history, push together, so that it takes the final fall For this, October is the official Breast Cancer Month for us all.

I now believe those most hurting and suffering are the wives, family and sweethearts who in doubt must wait than those young men who quickly met their fate.

In my mind's eye, I can still see a half ruined Buddhist temple and barely hear a brass bell clang as I meet of what's left of that valiant gang.

Good booze and bad women or is it the other way around for few of my friends are here to be found most thoughts are in the present and memories also we discuss; for that's all that's left... besides us.

So raise your glasses high for we present and those brave men and women passed and hope that we can last a bit more time for that lost bell that so fatefully rang, for those still left of The Da Nang Gang.

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Poetry Corner Electrifying Energy

By Maggie Ramos

I am not sure I am comfortable with what I am sensing from you today‌ We don't know each other well enough just yet.

Although it feels as if we have spent a lifetime and another half together.

You don't know where I've been and I don't know where you are coming from, nor where abouts are we headed.

We may just be bumping heads constantly and hurting the both of us more often than not.

We are positive & positive energy without a defined ground and when we do ground, we stand firm on negative & positive expressing deep sights that only the two of us may not ever understand.

A grounded, deep, electrifying connection burns the two of us without a clear or direct comprehension.

In silence, we hold ourselves from within. It may not be appropriate to share.

It may not be ethical to say. It may just lead us to unwanted expressions, feelings and regrets.

Sometimes I don't know where I stand. Sometimes I don't understand where you stand.

Do we stand against each other or do we stand side by side?

Missing You

By Lorraine Preda She was living his dream, in the suburbs An illusion of love and marriage Not realizing she had a choice She chose to stay in an empty, loveless marriage two hearts drifting, both stagnant One seeking more, the other complacent Drinking, drinking, drinking Lies, lies, lies Denial, denial, denial No aha’s until years later Finally, she emerged, the new you It was wonderful to see her Her new self, sparkling, like glitter As fragrant as fresh cut herbs Alive, overjoyed, blossoming with joy Ah, the fresh smell of freedom - at last She was found, not in Manhattan but Laguna Beach, feet in wet sand, grey hair tossed Laughing her strong feminine laugh Brown eyes a-twinkle with mischief.

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He Said

She Said Robert Tussey

We’re at a revolutionary time in history. Women are gaining on every level of life; from the corporate boardroom to the entrepreneurship of business start-ups.

It’s been a long time coming and a well-deserved place in history. And as the old saying goes, women have to do twice the work for half the recognition. There are many forces (still) at work to thwart this progress, and we all know their names and faces. Most. Sexual Harassment has been the hallmark of too much money, power, bloated egos and lack of self-control and conscience. The headlines have been full of these stories with detailed descriptions of the crimes. As a man, it embarrasses me how men can be so stupid as to think that they will go unpunished. On the other hand, this abuse is systemic, unfettered by law and enforcement. The powerful have always written the rules.

Still, do – if we look at the headlines and read between those lines, it’s clear that nothing has changed.

There are a lot of good men out there that do not harass women and understand the word ‘no.’ We suffer at the hands of the insolent idiots who make us all look like fools. We are angry with our brethren, but our voice is masked by the cacophonous railings against all men.

Should we have a voice here? I think so. We support our women. We love our women. I see postings on all social media calling men scum and worthless slobs. All men. I have to tread lightly here, as I want to make a statement from a man’s point of view and not sound callous.

Every societal shift is driven by something wrong that needs to be righted. To be fixed - systemically. The women’s movement saw it’s beginning in 1903 with Emmeline Pankhurst (There are questions as to whether this was the first of the movement, but it was the first to gain national attention). When she founded Women’s Social and Political Union, she felt it needed to be radical and militant if it was going to be effective. The Daily News named them Suffragettes and the title stuck. And over the succeeding years, many female faces have come to prominence in the fight for equality. This was the good fight, but men refused to accept the challenge and did everything in their power to thwart progress. Today, a lot has changed and yet so much hasn’t. Not enough. Like Emmeline’s husband, Richard Pankhurst, there have always been men who were supportive and vocal about women’s rights.

Today, we men (those who are active supporters of women’s rights and the right not to be harassed) want to be recognized in the fight. We all benefit from the alliance.

There is a place here for our voices. It’s not about ego or male braggadocio, our numbers are significant, and we believe that by being seen and heard, other men might recognize they need to fix their problem. But, too many of us don’t want to speak too loudly because no matter what we say, we’ll be chastised for making the issue about us. It’s not, and we know it.

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Judith A. Habert

Before I say anything more, I want to say thank you to men out there like Bob, who truly do work on behalf of women, after all, Bob has been an integral part of a women’s magazine for the past ten years. I don’t think any man who didn’t like women and felt they deserved equal treatment would have lasted that long. Are men like Bob the norm or the exception?

It is tough to say right now, since with all that is going on most men are afraid to even open their mouths, for fear that what they say may be taken as some sort of sexist or chauvinistic comment. Even, if they are being positive, many women may call them condescending. It is true that this is a tough climate for a man who isn’t like the ones we hear about every day now on the news.

When did all of this start? Some might say with the Bill Clinton/Monica Lewinski scandal. This certainly proved one fact that most women might never have realized, sex is such a major drive in men that they will even go so far as to risk the most prestigious position, President of the United States, in order to satisfy their sexual appetite. We all know that this type of behavior did not start with the Clinton indiscretions, but has been going on longer than most of us are alive. Some will say, men will be men (or was that boys will be boys?) and others will say that the press is blowing all of this way out of proportion.

Ok, you are probably not going to like what I am about to say, but here goes. I have worked the majority of my life in Male-dominated professions, and if I went by the definition of what sexual harassment is, I probably could have filed at least two dozen lawsuits, while in these occupations. The thing is, I always felt that if you were going to work in a field that was primarily men, you could not, or should not expect preferential treatment because you were a woman, because didn’t that prove the entire equality thing false. If those around you had to change the way they talked or joked or reacted because there was a woman in their presence, then weren’t we making the chasm even greater between men and women? So, the photographers in the studio at Doubleday Publishing, the Tech Reps at Canon USA, the Repair Techs at Nikon, etc. all talked about their girlfriends and wives, probably as they would have if I wasn’t around and it was just a bunch of guys having a beer together. Was I offended?

No, as a matter of fact, I learned a lot during those years, and I think I taught them a lot as well. I helped them understand why women feel the way they do, why they should treat their significant other with more respect, and in essence how much happier the women in their lives would make them if they were just a bit more respectful and kind to them. Yes, sometimes I cringed at the language or was asked seemingly inappropriate questions, but if I didn’t want to answer, or felt uncomfortable, I left the room or excused myself from the conversation.

Now, just to make this clear, I am not talking about physical abuse, or threats of firing if I did not cooperate with specific demands. I wholeheartedly agree that there is NEVER a time when that is acceptable! However, if a man is in a wheelchair, and poses for a picture with his arm around you he should not be ridiculed. It is simple logistics that the height of his wheelchair coupled with your height in high heels, might cause his hand to graze your derrière. In my opinion, that is not cause for a lawsuit or public shaming. On the other hand, if a man in power, makes sexual demands upon you in order for you to keep your job, then you should go directly to the top lawyer in town to make sure that this person of authority never has an opportunity to bully any other human being again. No one should ever feel they have to do anything for fear of losing their job and not being able to feed their baby or put a roof over their heads. I believe if a person in power does this then they deserve to be punished to the full extent of the law. All I am saying is, words may be misspoken, a friendly hug misunderstood, but when threats are made or implied the gloves come off and look out whoever you are because you will get taken down.

As for the many good men out there, we know who you are! We have married you; we are dating you, you are our brothers, our fathers, our fiancé, and our friends. We thank you for standing up for us and being there for us when we need you. We will not group you in with the despicable men who have been exposed for what they truly are, which is not men, they are arrogant bullies who believe because they have money and power that they can get away with anything, but guess what? They can’t.

Our 10th Anniversary Women of Distinction

Dr. Katherine Ludington, CARDIOLO GIST,

Gets To The Heart Of The Matter

By Janice Carter Booth

Photo by Deanna Haala

D

R. KATHERINE LUDINGTON, not only gets to the heart of the matter, but does it with kindness, caring, superb knowledge, and understanding. Escaping Hungary with her family at nine years of age gave her a truly unique perspective on life.

A complete realization on just how fragile and at the same time resilient we humans can be in dire situations.

Dr. Ludington has quite a lengthy list of degrees. In 1993 she graduated from Stanford University with Honors in Biology and Psychology.

While she was at Stanford, she met a wonderful man, who was a student there as well. When attending UC San Francisco, Greg not only moved with Katherine but supported her in all ways, even financially, during this very difficult time of medical training. In 1997 she graduated from UCSF medical school and married her extraordinary, supportive man, Greg.

During her stint at UCSF, she shared with me how she met a wonderful, compassionate, old fashion, Cardiologist, John Hutchinson.

He took Katherine under his wing, sharing all his knowledge with her.

Katherine was utterly fascinated by all the intricacies of the heart; therefore having a change of heart, she went from Pediatrics to Cardiology.

In 2000, Katherine finished her residency at Stanford Hospital, moving that same year to San Diego with a new addition to the family, three week old, lovely baby Sarah, (who by the way only 17, started at Stanford just this fall). On a personal note, I had the pleasure of speaking with Sarah when she was helping out at her mother’s office, and when her Mom came up in conversation, she said to me. “My Mom is my Hero!”

I could feel tears well up in my eyes, because what teenage daughter, in a very sincere reverent way, says this about her Mom? In 2003, Dr. Ludington started Fellowship Training in Cardiology at UCSD. Then finished her Fellowship Training in Cardiovascular Diseases, with Honors, at UCSF. Immediately after, she began working at Scripps Green Hospital as a full-time Cardiologist until 2007, when she started her own practice in Encinitas, called North Coast Cardiology. Her practice has grown so much over the past ten years; she has not only taken on another female Cardiologist but also, expanded to a second office in Oceanside.

Now for the story of Katherine’s family fleeing from Hungary. In 1980, Hungary was still under Communist

rule, and Katherine’s mother, Nancy, was a family doctor, who made house calls. The government told her mom that she had to come to work in the State Hospital, and if she didn’t her children, Ingrid, four, and Katherine, nine, would no longer be allowed to attend school. It became clear to her parents that this could not happen.

Nancy and Joseph packed a couple of bags, and with just the clothes on their back, declared they were going on a vacation. Of course, they were not allowed to go to just any country; they could only visit Communist countries. So, they went to Czechoslovakia and Poland. Then somewhere along this so-called ‘vacation’ Photo Courtesy of Dr. Ludington

41

SABABA WATER

Water With a Cause Photos courtesy of Sababa Water

In 2014 a company was formed by Jonathan Stone and Dawn Elyzabeth, hosts of a Local Las Vegas radio show.

No, not some glitzy high roller company, but one that’s purpose was to stop childhood hunger. When this duo learned the staggering statistic that one out of six children in the United States go to bed hungry they felt it was their duty to do something to help. Thus the birth of Sababa Water.

With 13,118,000 children food insecure across America how could a company that sells water make a difference? Well Stone and Elyzabeth came up with an amazing concept. They proved that water most definitely can save lives, one bottle at a time. Sababa is a One into One company which means that for every Sababa product you buy Sababa will donate a meal to a food insecure child in your community. In our home state of California alone there are 2,099,120 children living in Food-Insecure households.

Because of the generosity of Sababa water and the residents of California’s desire to make a purchase that means something, to date 123,036 hungry children received free meals, and the number is growing daily. So go out and buy a Sababa Water today and feed a hungry child.

Food4Less stores throughout San Diego carry Sababa Water.

Go on their site www.sababawater.com to locate a store near you.

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they quietly slipped over a border into a free country, Italy, where they were helped as refugees. They were given visas and funds that made it possible to come to the good ole USA! I found it very interesting when Dr. Ludington expressed to me that there was a difference in the treatment of men’s and women’s heart issues, a fact, she realized that isn’t always addressed. For instance, the catheter size between a woman and a man is significantly different during an angiogram. Of course, she has male patients as well as female, but in her heart of hearts, she is truly committed to women’s health issues.

Now that she has her own practice, she is so delighted that she had more time for her family. As she expressed to me, she can watch her 12-year-old daughter, Abby, play volleyball, attend the girls dance competitions, and still make it home for dinner with the family.

It sounds like a full plate, but Dr. Ludington still takes time to speak in the community to other doctors, sharing her expertise, especially when it comes to the differences between the hearts’ of the sexes.

Writing about Dr. Katherine Ludington has been such a rush for me! To me, finding, a doctor with so much knowledge, who truly considers the patient’s feelings, and concerns, was super important! Besides, being so thorough, she is also a great listener. For example, I had many tests, ranging from a Carotid Artery test to an echocardiogram. All my concerns were addressed by her and her great staff!

I only hope this article can do her Justice! So I will finish by saying I am truly awestruck by this remarkable woman who happens to be an incredible Doctor of the Heart!

S P O R T S

The Astros Win It All For Their Town

By Carol Heath

H

OUSTON TEXAS was ravaged by a hurricane of mammoth proportions. Thousands of people were left homeless, over 60 people lost their lives, and well over 185 billion dollars’ worth of damage was caused by this Hurricane 4 named Harvey, While the baseball team from Houston, the Astros, were playing baseball games in Florida.

Many players have homes in Houston, and their families were left behind to live through one of Mother Nature’s worst hurricanes in history. The Astros returned to their families and immediately rolled up their sleeves to help the storm victims.

They passed out water and

food; rowed boats to rescue pets from rooftops; carried children and seniors to safety; they did whatever they could to help their city begin to heal.

It was like they took it personally that Mother Nature chose their city to attack.

A love affair began between the Astros and the city of Houston. And when they won the final game that sent them to play in the World Series, the city rejoiced.

There was something to look forward to, something that wasn’t negative or waterlogged. Their Astros were going to play in the World Series, and they were proud.

Although it wouldn't be the first time, the Astros

went to the big show. They played against the Chicago White Sox in the 2005 World Series but lost. This Astro team played for their city, a city they loved and they were not about to lose.

They had to play the mighty Dodgers, who had one of their best seasons ever. It went all the way to the final game 7, and it has already been dubbed the best World Series ever played.

So many sports writers didn’t give them a chance; the betting lines favored the Dodgers; it seemed the sports announcers favored the Dodgers as well. But when the Astros started hitting homeruns, 15 in total, the most in any World

Series, people started sitting up and taking notice. These guys were for real, and when they made it all the way to game 7, everyone just knew that since the Dodgers were playing at home, and were used to this kind of pressure, they would win the final and deciding game.

By the second inning, the Astros were leading 5 to nothing, zero, zilch! The mighty Dodgers were down by 5, and by the end of the game, they only managed to score one lowly run against the upstart Houston Astros.

Those same Astros that helped their fellow Houstonians begin to heal from Harvey. Those same Astros that helped donate 400

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million dollars to their city.

They put their money and their bats where it did the most good.

There were stand out players, but no one wanted to be singled out, they were a team, Houston's team.

They wore a badge that said Houston Strong on their uniforms. Every time one of the team would hit a home run or make a great play, or bat in a run, the whole team would celebrate. They jumped up and down, yelled out, and beat their chest and the badge that said Houston Strong.

This team was infectious, even if you weren’t a baseball fan you couldn’t help but get caught up in their childlike enthusiasm.

When the final play of the series, a ground ball that was scooped up, thrown to first and the runner was called out, the celebration began. They jumped on each other, hugged each other, cried in each other’s arms, and grinned from ear to ear.

They ran from the bullpen, they ran from the dugout, they ran from the outfield, they all wanted to be together to celebrate this win for their city.

I can’t really finish this article without pointing out a young man named, George Springer, the MVP of the series. Not only did he hit homeruns in games 2,4,5,6 and 7, but he also held up his trophy and said, "This is for Houston." In fact, each team member that was interviewed on the field said the same thing, "Houston this is for you."

The Astros were honored by a special parade on the main streets in Houston and in Disneyworld. However, one of the players, Carlos Correa, who proposed to his girlfriend on camera after the end of game 7, was more excited about his girl saying yes, than any parades.

Why was this such a special and memorable World Series? Because this was a young and hungry bunch of kids, that celebrated and appreciated the fact that they were alive. They wanted to bring back a World Series Championship win to their city that had suffered and endured so much. They accomplished their goal in a captivating and entertaining achievement they will always remember, and so will Houston.

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The Mason Jar Story & Photo by Janice Carter-Booth

I

T IS AN ANTIQUE SHOP IN RAMONA, AND THE NAME IS as unique as the owner Debbie Roelle.

This gem, a 15-year dream come true business, has been up and running for over four years. I call it a gem, because of all the antique shops I’ve been in, the Mason Jar is the most eclectic, with endless variety. For instance, Debbie even has what she calls their “Man Cave” section, where there are tools, scales, steins, bar accessories, and horse tackle too. Christmas, all year long has a room of its own. There is a Kitchen area with vintage copper kettles galore, anything you wish for in metal, and porcelain, including the kitchen sink. Sewing, dollhouse miniatures, toys for all ages, and even a Library area, where you might enjoy a good read. One can’t beat the vintage glassware and china from many eras and brought from around the world. Now toward the back of the store, in an outside area, Debbie has her garden section, where I’ve found wonderfully rare items. Then last but not least there is a whole array of fabulous jewelry, vintage clothes, and accessories. All this in one store, where the price is low and the quality high!

Before, opening her dream store, Debbie, raised her four children. During which time she grew an e-bay business and accumulated inventory at garage, estate sales, auctions, and road trips not unlike the ‘The Antique Roadshow,’ She awaited her time to open this endearing shop in Ramona and hopes to keep it going, at a time when many businesses have closed. It seems the little business owner has a very big job, just keeping their doors open. So, come on out to the Mason Jar at 652 Main St. at the east end, where the finds are as abundant as the smiles!!

SINCE 1776, 48 MILLION AMERICANS HAVE SERVED IN THE ARMED FORCES. WE HONOR ALL VETERANS WHO HAVE GIVEN OF THEIR LIVES FOR FREEDOM! 45

Fabulous Finds

1 1. The Happiness Machine

By Gerald M. Neff Do you remember waking -up several times every night short of breath and gasping with a dry mouth and that is not even including the terrible chainsaw sound of your own snoring?

When talking with friends and your wife, you will realize that you just might have ‘sleep apnea.’ Sleep Apnea is a common breathing disorder in which you have one or more pauses in your breathing, or very shortened breaths while sleeping. Breath pauses can last from a few seconds to minutes including your waking-up several times an hour, then start again with a loud snort or a choking sound, and can lead to dangerous results.

The Veterans Affairs Administration and 99% of insurance companies will recommend and reimburse for the 24hour test which inevitably results in the positive diagnosis of sleep apnea.

My test showed that I woke up 57-60 times per hour always sleepy and with low energy, and almost without a loving companion.

The Phillips Respironics Machine is the marvelous solution for this serious problem. After your test confirmation, you will be fitted and instructed on the use of a sleep CPAP machine. In just a few days you will see an amazing difference; even after the first night with your new Phillips machine no more snoring, and after several hours of proper sleep

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2 with this and its simple to use mask, a new world will open up for you and your wife and the family.

Three hours of sleep with this apparatus is like 5-6 normal hours of good, sane sleep, and as mentioned no more frightening sounds to alienate your partner. Without going into all of the health hazards that sleep apnea can lead to heart arrest, divorce, and more.

You must react and take this warning seriously.

Doctors and my fellow Phillips CPAP Respironics machine users highly recommend this for your own personal health and happiness, and remember ‘your life could very well depend on your quick action.’

Breathing Phillips Respironics is Breathing Life !!!

2. Eat Smart At Home Just when we were all marveling at how easy a certain ‘big company,’ has made grocery shopping, by allowing us to go online and order our groceries while sitting in the comfort of our living rooms, along comes a not so big company, with what I view as a very big and even better idea.

Eat Smart, a leading producer of fresh-cut vegetables and chef-inspired salad kits, recently launched an online home delivery service: EatSmartatHome. com.

The new service offers Eat Smart vegetable bags, trays, and salads in a pre-

mium online shopping experience and make it easy for consumers to ensure fresh vegetables are available in their homes at all times. It’s available in select Western states, including all of Nevada, Arizona, Idaho, Utah; most of California and parts of Oregon, Wyoming, Colorado, New Mexico and Texas.

With EatSmartatHome.com, shoppers can enjoy easy and delicious ways to include vegetables at every meal. I have to say the ordering was seamless, the delivery was seamless, but what really sold me on this delivery service over the ‘big guys’ delivery service were two very important elements. First, everything on the order form was healthy and guilt free. It is way too tempting to order all of those high-calorie items when you know there will be no one looking in your cart while you stand online at the checkout.

The second thing and the most impressive one to me was that the fresh vegetables stayed fresher in my refrigerator than ANY other fresh vegetables I have purchased either online, at the local grocery store or even at the farmer’s market. Eat Fresh advertises that they use Apio’s patented BreatheWay® packaging technology, which delivers extreme freshness and extended shelf life. This is the most honest statement I have ever seen. I was amazed when I discovered a bag of veggies that had been pushed to the back of my refrigerator weeks after my delivery, and they

Fabulous Finds

3 were as fresh as the ones I ate the first few days I had the shipment delivered.

This alone was worth every penny, and I might add, the prices were no higher than your local grocery store. Try this service today. Or give a delivery to a friend as a holiday gift. I guarantee you will not be disappointed and neither will they. To make this service even more enticing, they offer free shipping on purchases over $30.

To order this great healthy service go to https://www.eatsmartathome. com/ 3. GO CUBES Chewable Coffee When I first received a sample of GO CUBES, I thought about which member of our editorial product testing team I would pass it on to, since I don’t drink coffee and therefore figured I would not be the appropriate person to review this product. However, after sharing GO CUBES with some team members, I had to admit I was curious since they all seemed to like the fact that they could get that boost of caffeine without having to run to the local coffee shop for a cup of coffee. So, I tried one, and it didn’t have that aftertaste of coffee that I disliked, it didn’t even have a super strong coffee flavor, and yes I had energy. After researching the ingredients, I learned that it wasn’t just caffeine, but the combination of Caffeine, L-Theanine, Vitamin B-6, and Vitamin B-12 that give you the energy without the jittery feel-

ing that equivalent amounts of coffee would produce. Their advertisement was right when they claimed four hours of focus on a GO CUBE. Each one is the equivalent of a half cup of coffee. So I am here to say if you are a coffee addict, or if you never touched a drop in your life, give Go Cubes a try. It will give you energy and focus with each bite.

GO CUBES are vegan and gluten-free.

They do not contain gelatin - they’re made with pectin, which comes from plants. No soy, no peanuts, no tree nuts, no egg, no dairy, no fish or shellfish.

GO CUBES come in three delicious flavors Latte, Mocha, and Pure Drip. Go to https://hvmn.com/go-cubes to order your supply today.

4. HVMN

Nootropics for All I have to admit before receiving this product for testing I had never heard of the term ‘Nootropics.’ For those of you, not familiar Nootropics are also called smart drugs and cognitive enhancers.

These are drugs, supplements, or other substances that improve cognitive function, particularly executive functions, memory, creativity, or motivation, in healthy individuals. Since I am recently having problems remembering what I had for lunch, I decided to give it a shot and see if I could regain some of those flailing memories. I must say I can already see some changes, at least I can tell you I had a salad for lunch and I can

4 even remember what I had for dinner last night. So, I am going to keep it up, and I suggest you give it a try.

Hailed as Silicon Valley’s preferred nootropics, HVMN is widely regarded as the #1 nootropics in the world. HVMN consists of RISE, KADO-3, SPRINT, and YAWN which focus on four key aspects of brain health and performance. HVMN supplies you with all the nootropics you need for one month.

RISE is the definitive daily nootropic featured by the New York Times, Wall Street Journal, and more. The components in RISE have been shown to enhance memory, stamina, and resilience. Maintaining peak cognitive performance is an active, consistent investment, so take RISE consistently.

KADO-3 is a supercharged krill and fish oil stack designed for the daily protection of the brain and body. KADO-3 is optimized with a 2:1 ratio of DHA to EPA, the two forms of Omega-3 fatty acids. DHA is associated with cognition.

KADO-3 rounds out with three synergistic components: Vitamin K, Astaxanthin, and Vitamin D. SPRINT is a nootropic blend designed for an immediate cognitive benefit. SPRINT is ideal to use to conquer a big project, a long day at work, or any mentally demanding task. By promoting alertness and relaxation at the same time, SPRINT puts you into the ideal mental flow state for getting work done.

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Fabulous Finds

5 YAWN is a nootropic blend of components optimized for each of the three phases of sleep: falling asleep, improving quality of sleep, and feeling refreshed upon waking up. Sufficient, high-quality sleep is widely agreed to be the single most important activity you can do to optimize cognition and your mental state in the near-term.

To order HVMN go to https:// hvmn.com/nootrobox

5. SoCal Curls The Safe Way to Beautiful Hair.

You love that beachy curl look, but you just have not been able to achieve it with traditional methods. It either looks too curly or too straight, so what is a girl to do? Try the latest craze SoCal Curls, the innovative curling hair tie that combines revolutionary low-heat technology with the classic friar tuck. Just zap, tie, tuck and go for beautiful curls!

This unique new product is the answer to all your problems when it comes to the time and headaches involved with obtaining that perfect hairstyle for your night out with the girls, or that special someone. You just heat the tie wrap for 30 seconds in the microwave, tie it around your head, tuck in your hair and voila you look stylish as you run last minute errands before your date. Perhaps you want a no heat or chemical solution to the daily grind of having your hair look perfect for work every day. SoCal Curls

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6 can be left in overnight, and you will wake to a beautiful, effortless hairstyle in the morning. Depending on what you desire SoCal Curls can give you beachy waves, or even springing spirals. It’s up to you. You can get lots of looks with the SoCal Curls Hair Curling Tie! Simply wrap larger sections of hair for the beachy waves and smaller sections for tighter curls. Do you have long and thick hair?

No problem, you can use two hair ties to get your curl on!

NO TANGLES. NO HARSH HEAT. NO CHEMICALS! Order yours today at https://www. socalcurls.com/

6. T-fal Triple Basket Deep Fryer The T-fal Triple Basket Deep Fryer was one of our favorite items to test in our kitchens at San Diego Woman Magazine.

Let’s face it, who doesn’t like some freshly made French fries or fried chicken. We had a few of our crew test out their family recipes for the best-fried chicken, but in this fryer, they all tasted great. This is a user-friendly, at-home deep frying system with an immersed heating element for professional results. The food tasted like it was cooked in a professional fryer at your favorite restaurant. The T-fal Triple Basket Deep Fryer Features adjustable temperature settings and holds up to 4 Liters of oil, it is the perfect appliance for all of your frying needs. A perfect addition to meet your holiday

7 cooking needs. The Triple Basket Deep Fryer includes three baskets (one large and two smaller) with an oil ready light that lets you know when the oil reaches the correct frying temperature. Not only that, but it offers easy cleaning with its stainless steel, removable bowl. If you like fried food, this is an item you cannot live without and a perfect gift for any chef on your Christmas list. Available at Target.

7. Spony Convertible Ballcap Are you looking for a fun gift or stocking stuffer for that young lady in your life? The Spony is an item that once they own one they will not know how they ever lived without it. If you have ever had a bad hair day, you can truly appreciate the value of this gift. If you want to be trendy or look like you are being trendy, but are really just having a bad hair day, why not try the Spony.

This is the greatest invention since sliced bread for those of us with long hair, who don’t always feel like spending hours with a blow dryer or straightening iron.

Just grab a hairband, pull your hair into a ponytail, and stick it through the perfectly positioned opening of this unique new convertible Women’s Ballcap. When I say convertible, I mean like the car, you can wear it open to allow your ponytail to peek out whether you are wearing a high ponytail, side ponytail or even a bun. Make bad hair days a thing of the

Fabulous Finds 8

9 past with Spony! Visit https://spony. com/ to order yours now.

8. Hello Penny Bar Are you looking for a unique addition to your wedding or any special occasion? Just say Hello Penny Bar. The Penny Bar is a 1946 vintage trailer that was professionally restored and converted into a mobile bar, servicing all of Southern California. The bar has an amazing chic feel that can add a special glow to your next special event or cocktail party. It will make a statement about which your guests won’t be able to stop talking. The bar is available for rental alone so you can have your own bartenders staff it or fully staffed with two professionals from the staff of Penny Bar. They also offer additional items like lawn games, wicker furniture, interior decorations, and special glassware. The Penny Bar may be an antique, but you would never know it. It is well furnished with two large serving sinks that hold 100+ drinks with ice, three large coolers to keep ice cold all day and night, two three gallon glass water jugs with pour spouts and even a USB charging station for multiple phones.

So when you are planning your next event don’t forget to invite Penny. She will be the hit of the party. Visit http:// www.hellopennybar.com/ for more information and to make a reservation.

9. HASHTAGIT! Are you planning a party and searching for something to do which will keep the evening moving and everyone laughing? Well, Endless Games has the solution, HASHTAGIT! This is a fun party game for the over 18 crowd. Next time your group gets together, and you are tired of doing the same old things, grab HASHTAGIT and make the evening a ton of laughs. The game is easy to play. It starts off with a picture card, of sometimes unmentionable topics, being selected by the judge. Each player has seven hashtag cards to choose from to associate with the picture shown. The judge is handed all of the hashtag cards that have been selected by the players in a random order, and one of the hashtags is selected as the most fitting one to accompany the photo. The play continues until one lucky player ends up with 7 picture cards and he/she is the winner. Go to http://endlessgames.com/ and order HASHTAGIT! 10. Livad® Skin Care Strong & Silky Cuticle Cream Women obsess about looking and feeling young. Our skin is one of the most obvious indicators of age, so most women are obsessed with their skincare routines. What most women focus on is their face and neck, and give little consideration to their hands and nails. Your

10 hands are one of the most used and abused parts of the body, and it is often thought that your hands give away your true age.

Dr. Janet H. Prystowsky, regarded as one of Manhattan’s Top Dermatologists and a Super Doctor, spent years with seasoned cosmetic formulators to develop a moisturizer that truly complemented her patients’ skin. After years of success in her dermatology practice, she’s finally brought her product to the general public. She has several products that help with the anti-aging process but has just recently added a product intended for the hands and nails.

What makes Dr. Prystowsky’s development so unique is that she is using bioidentical vitamins A, D, and E which are naturally found in your body, which means less irritation and more longterm benefits for you. Many anti-aging products try to artificially plump skin and can irritate if used too often. Their special formula is naturally compatible with your skin’s biome for long-term improvement. Their formula works beyond fine lines and wrinkles as well. In addition to improving skin smoothness, over 60% of women in their eight-week study said they believed their skin’s elasticity, brightness, and firmness also improved!

To look and feel younger order Livid Skin Care Strong & Silky Cuticle Cream at https://livadskincare.com/

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M E E T T H E L AT E S T A D D I T I O N S TO T H E S A N D I E G O W O M A N P I N K PA G E S

Rauni Prittinen King, RN, MIH is a Founder and President of Miraglo Foundation, a non-profit focused on healing people and transforming lives through education, health and research -- locally, nationally and internationally.

A Healing Touch practitioner/instructor, she also is Executive Director of Pacific Pearl La Jolla. This hub for integrative health and medicine, research and education houses Guarneri Integrative Health, Inc., Miraglo Foundation, Holistic and Integrative Medicine Resources, Inc., Consciousness and Healing Initiative, and the Academy of Integrative Health & Medicine. Their video studio hosts lectures, classes, workshops, conferences and streams webinars. For treatments, services, events, donating: contact Rauni at 858459-6919. rking@pacificpearllajolla.com.

Mimi Guarneri, MD, FACC, ABOIM is an internationallyrenowned Integrative Cardiologist who leads a team of experts in state-of-the-art Conventional, Integrative and Natural Medicine at Guarneri Integrative Health, Inc. at Pacific Pearl La Jolla. She is a Founder and President of the Academy of Integrative Health & Medicine. She has received numerous honors and is ranked as number six of the 100 Top Physicians Practicing Integrative Medicine

by Newsmax, 2015. Dr. Guarneri is Co-founder and serves on the board of Miraglo Foundation, a nonprofit providing healthcare and education to the underserved.

For clinical appointments call 858-459-6919. See www. pacificpearllajolla.com.

Books, DVDs: 108 Pearl to Awaken Your Healing Potential (2017) http://mimiguarnerimd.com/book/; The Heart Speaks (2007); The Science of Natural Healing video series, The Great Courses. www.mimiguarnerimd.com www.pacificpearllajolla.com

www.pacificpearllajolla.com

www.miraglofoundation.org

www.miraglofoundation.org

https://www.facebook.com/PacificPearlLaJolla/

https://www.facebook.com/MiragloFoundation/

https://www.linkedin.com/in/mimi-guarneri-md-faccaboim-577bbb122/

https://www.linkedin.com/in/rauni-prittinen-king-6366a1a4/

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Our 10th Anniversary Women of Distinction so, to her being a mother first, Pathways Academy Charter School ciously and a Program Lead at Pathways.

Carol is truly dedicated to the chilshe makes sure she greets every WHERE CHILDREN COME FIRST dren; child, by name as they come through the Story & Photo by Janice Carter-Booth

W

HEN THE DOORS OPENED in 2014 for Pathways Academy, Carol McIntosh, who never dreamed of running a school, was doing just that. After one charter school split, and another closed, none having the same vision, Carol, a teacher of 24 years, was forced to rethink her options.

Starting a public charter -homeschool seemed insurmountable, but with such encouragement, support, and more than a bit of a nudge from her, husband, David, she ventured forth into uncharted waters. Low and behold up sprang this wonderful learning center, Pathways Academy.

Pathways Academy started with just 70 kids and three teachers. Now they have 180 students, eight teachers, and an intern. It is TK- 12th with the possibility for middle school, and High School age children to go to Palomar College concurrently. Educational funds for college texts are available for those grade students. In fact, a student at Pathways, was the youngest ever, just 13, to graduate from Palomar College! Claire Lewis graduated from High School at Pathways and from Palomar College with her AA, this past June. Finding this out was a real “Wow,” moment to me!

Pathways conducts its classes across from San Marcos State University. Their

motto is ‘Kids First, then everything else will follow.’ Each family sits down with a credentialed teacher to map out lesson plans, choosing the curriculum to fit the student and their learning style. Carol explained that there are three learning styles. One being kinesthetic, which means hands-on, and more mobility. Often these children learn through songs and movement, (acting) for instance.

Also, there is the visual learner, and then the auditory learner, learning through hearing the information. Families also get educational funds to attend optional enrichment classes. For instance, this year Pathways offers technology, art, acting, music, robotics, foreign language, science labs and some higher math classes, on site. Other funds go for curriculum, tutoring, field trips, and offsite vendors. The on-site classes are on Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday.

Carol said, “Our whole staff is continuing to grow and learn about different types of curriculum and different homeschool models.”

Now for a little about the lady, that made all this possible! She was born and raised in Wisconsin, she told me, she loves butter, and cheese and actually thinks they are a food group. She is a die-hard Green Bay Packers fan, besides.

When she finds the time from working as Program Lead for Pathways, Carol’s loves to go swimming, scuba diving, and cooking her favorite foods.

Carol has two teaching credentials, one from UCSD, for California, and one from Wisconsin. She homeschooled her own three children, now 23, 24, and 26, until her oldest reached the 4th grade.

For a lot of years, Carol was a single parent, so it wasn’t just smooth sailing, while the kids were growing. Then, sometime later, something wonderful and unexpected happened to Carol, She met “a most delightful man,” her words, who has taken a back seat, but most gra-

door. She also takes care of any pending questions or concerns from parents as the children go to class. Her multi-tasking ability is uncanny. I do not think I’ve ever seen her without a warm smile of welcome for every one of 180 students through the years. I can truly vouch for this incredible lady, and her sincere and on top of things approach because five of my grandchildren are going to Pathways now. Two whom had struggled in public school. Seemingly these issues couldn’t be resolved. Kiri is smart, but a handson type of girl, who was hard pressed being in classrooms with 30 plus kids.

For Oliver the teachers he studied under weren’t following the very important, motto “Kids First.”

In conclusion, if there were more people like Carol in the world, not only would it be a kinder, and more gracious place, but children would have bigger smiles while opening their minds to all the possibilities, they never imagined existed, and at their fingertips, no less!

If you want a great educational experience for your children or grandchildren, check out Pathways’ website. www.pathwaysacademy.education.

Pathways phone number, also Carol’s cell is 920 277 6743.

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Our 10th Anniversary Women of Distinction

Don’t Let Your Dreams

in half marathons. He invited me to the Challenged Athletes Foundation charity fundraising ride in October 2012.

While training, Coach John, who had held the paced bicycle land speed record from 1985-1995 at 152mph, noticed that the spark and inner drive Photos courtesy of Denise Mueller I’d had when I was a teenager was still there. He told me that no woman had ever gone after always had a healthy lifestyle the paced bicycle land speed and used to jog. In 1986 his record that men have done father bought my Dad and I a couple of mountain bicycles. In since 1899.

I immediately said I wanted early 1987 we entered a local to do it and we spent the next charity bike ride, and I was hooked. I enjoyed being able to four years putting the plan in place for me to be the first push myself. woman to set the paced bicycle We did multiple charity land speed record at 147mph rides that year and met two on September 12, 2016, at the bicycle coaches that I began Bonneville Salt Flats during the working with, John Howard World of Speed event. and Doreen Smith-Williams.

After setting the record, we I entered my first bicycle race planned to do a day of record in September 1987 and won and got hooked on racing, too. runs to up the speed record, but it had rained overnight.

I raced for five years and won Frustrated at not being able to 13 national cycling titles and realize more, we said we would received two podiums at the 150 mph – on a bicycle? Yep. Read go back another year to go after World Championships. about the fascinating woman and the overall record of 167 mph!

I hung the bike up afher amazing accomplishments. In Well, we planned for 2017 but ter high school and entered her own words: had to move the attempt to the family business after my parents’ divorce. I met my first 2018.

Then we discovered that husband there and took over the Hoehn Range Rover vehicle the leadership of the business we used in 2016 would not be in the early 1990’s. available, so we were back at We had three children WAS BORN IN ARIZONA, and worked in the business square one in preparation. but I have been a San Diego for almost 20 years. Much like Also, 2017 turned out to girl since I was nine months be one heck of a year. Not only in bicycle racing, there were old. I grew up in Encinitas and ups and downs in business. In did I break bones in February, graduated from San Dieguito but I also met and married 2012 my husband and I diHigh School. I learned dedica- vorced and ironically that was the man of my dreams, Chris tion as I watched my parents Korenek, in 111 days, ran the the year I also got back on the give so much to grow their bicycle. I had reconnected with Great Wall of China Marathon business, Rancho Santa Fe Se- my coach John Howard who in May, and was shot in my curity Systems. My father had right leg with a 9mm bullet in worked with one of my sons

PA S S Y O U B Y

By Sharon Hightower

I

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Our 10th Anniversary Women of Distinction October the result of a faulty trigger.

The story of my life - crazy unique things happening that just seem to add to my life. Even with all the “distractions” from my training, I am in shape and on track with my training, so our sights are set for September 2018.

And my amazing family is on board. My eldest son, Jonathan Boever is finishing up his businesses degree with plans to take over the family business as the 3rd generation. My middle son, Michael Boever, moved to South Dakota where his father’s family is located.

My youngest son, Daniel Boever, just graduated high school and is starting his own online business.

Some of my other hobbies are racing cars. I have raced in about 23 car races since 2011 in a Junker car series called The 24 Hours of LeMons (a spoof on the 24 hours of LeMans), riding off-road motorcycles, and shooting in local firearms competitions.

I have always been an adrenaline junkie and enjoyed going fast. There is a special “nirvana” I experience when I am going fast or doing something that requires all my effort and attention. Many athletes talk about the “zone” when they are doing what they love.

I experienced this calm and peaceful moment when I was drafting behind the Range Rover for the record in 2016.

The faster we went, the slower everything seemed to be.

When there is a life or death situation, all other

distractions just disappear.

Having ADHD, I am constantly bombarded with multiple thoughts and ideas at any given time, but when I am going 147mph, my mind can’t be anywhere else but in the moment, which is such a beautiful experience since it is so rare to be 100% in the moment. The

hike at 74 years old when he was caught in a freak April snow storm.

I desire to take the overall record for the paced bicycle land speed record in 2018 by going at least 170mph. Once I have accomplished this, it is my goal to do inspirational public speaking about getting

faster I went, the slower things were. It was Nirvana. I could not wait to get another run to experience that rush and peace again.

I also explain that my “heritage” runs deep with both my parents being a bit out of the normal mold as my examples in life. My Mom used to race powder puff demolition cars in the late 1960’s and celebrated her 80th birthday by skydiving for the first time! My Dad rode his bicycle around the outer perimeter of the United States, 12,100 miles in 9 ½ months in his 70th year! Ironically he passed away during a 22-mile

back into the game of life. I had the amazing ability to come back and do crazy amazing feats by setting goals.

There are so many people out there that once they settle into the routine of family and career, they set aside setting goals for themselves. I was there, and then I set a goal in 2009 to run a marathon. And before I knew it, I was getting back on the bike. I got out of the rut and back on track by getting healthy and achieving dreams! I want to inspire others to get back into the game of life. You just don’t know where it can lead you!

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Our 10th Anniversary Women of Distinction

Melinda Jarrell

MAKING DREAMS COME TRUE

By Judith A. Habert Photos Courtesy of Melinda Jarrell

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T IS FINALLY HAPPENING! YOU and your husband have decided to go on that dream vacation to Europe that you have been talking about for years. A three-week long adventure to Italy, France, and Greece. Your first thought is I should go online and see what great deal I can get on all of those trendy travel sites that promise ease, convenience, and savings. Five hours later you cannot figure how to get a connecting flight that won't require a 9-hour layover when you finally fix that problem you find out that the hotel you just booked in Greece only has one bathroom for every four rooms.

So, what happened to the ease, convenience, and savings?

The cold hard facts are that when you rely on the internet alone to book your own trip, you are taking a chance that the companies behind the beautiful websites might not truly exist. That the rooms you book, may look nothing like the ones you view on the site, and that your hard earned money may not be going anywhere but into some unscrupulous person’s bank account.

I had the pleasure of speaking with Melinda Jarrell, Owner of www.WinnerDestination.com an all-inclusive travel website based out of San Marcos

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California. Melinda has been in this business for the past six years and has hundreds of satisfied customers who can attest to the importance of booking your trip through a travel agent and not on your own through a bunch of unknown websites on the Internet.

What Melinda offers is the value of the Internet rates with the knowledge and expertise of a professional travel agent to navigate your way through this unprotected territory of discount this, and cheap that, which you are bombarded with the minute you search the word vacation.

My first question for Melinda is probably the same one many of you have had regarding taking this route when booking your dream vacation, honeymoon or just a weekend getaway.

“Is it more expensive to use a travel agent than to book the trip myself?”

The answer is a resounding “No.” Travel agents are compensated by the travel companies with whom you book and not by the consumer. In many cases not only does it not cost you money, it can actually save you money since they are up to date on which hotels, cruise ships, airlines or tour companies are offering discounted or special promotions like a free night stay or $100 voucher for free food or room upgrades.

When it comes to the actual logistics of booking your trip, consider this very important fact, with a professional travel agent you as the customer are getting a free service guided by the expertise of someone who is a professional and often has traveled to the

same destination of which you are inquiring. In the case of Melinda, there are few locations she has not been too “I have had the pleasure of personally visiting 66 countries, so when I book a trip for a customer it is often someplace that I have visited. This allows me to talk from personal experience as to the best location to stay, the best hotels and the best tours to take part in when visiting the particular country."

If Melinda hasn't been to the spot you want to visit, chances are someone she has booked a trip for over the past six years has, and she always follows up with clients upon their return to find out about their trip. "I always contact customers when they return to find out how the trip was, to be sure that the locations and hotels were up to their standards and to just find out how their overall experience was. It is just part of the service I provide. It also lets me know which hotels, tours, restaurants, etc. to suggests to future clients when they decide to book trips to these same locations.” When was the last time you received a call from one of those internet sites to chat about your trip? So, as you can see booking with a travel agent does provide an added personal touch to your trip.

While chatting with Melinda about her business and the pride she takes in making sure that every customer is happy with the trip she plans, I shared with her a negative personal experience I had with a vacation and how stranded I felt because I had booked it online. "Yes, this is also a major consideration. What do you do if you get to a

Our 10th Anniversary Women of Distinction location, and for some reason, they lost your reservation, or they overbooked, and you are left in a strange country at night with no hotel room. Have you ever tried reaching an online travel company after work hours? If one of my customers has a problem, they have my number, they call me, and I handle the crisis. They are not left on their own in a foreign location with no idea what to do."

Originally from Ohio, Melinda and her husband moved here 32 years ago when her husband’s job brought him to Sunny San Diego, so she is practically a native after all this time. Melinda's previous jobs incorporated skills that naturally led her to her current vocation. She worked in production control, and logistics, which called for acute planning skills and her position in sales and marketing was helpful in running a successful online business. A previous meeting and events planning company position was also a natural lead into travel planning, so when she was downsized from this firm the desire to branch out on her own led her to open Winner Destination. Melinda did not just start a site and call herself a travel agent she went back to school to obtain training and certification and spent all of her time immersed in the world of travel. When she felt competent and had earned her licenses, this is when she started her business.

With all that is going on in the world today I had to ask if Melinda has noticed a decline in international travel for fear of terrorism. "No, we haven't seen a decline in bookings. I am a firm believer that if you are aware of your surroundings at all times, you will be fine. Terrorism is a horrific problem, but it has happened in the states as often as in European locations, so you just have to always be on your toes while traveling."

So getting back to that dream vacation that you are finally going to

plan, I asked Melinda, “What is the process for booking a trip with WinnerDestination?" Her response was simple, "Go to my site, if they want to look around a bit at the highlighted trips or just call my number or email me. The first thing I will do is a short interview of sorts to ascertain where they want to go and what they like to do when traveling. We will also discuss what their time frame and budgetary considerations are. I then ask what is most important to them.

For some people they want a great hotel room, for others, they don't plan on spending much time in the room, so their main requirement is the location of the hotel which they want within walking distance of the city center or top sightseeing spots in the location they are visiting. Some may want a

what suggestion would you give to someone who wants to become a travel agent. “I would suggest that they first obtain formal education in the field, but that alone isn’t enough.

They would then have to take a good amount of time researching the many travel companies and tour companies to find out which ones are reputable and of which to steer clear. Do a lot of reading and be sure the companies you plan to recommend to your clients have been in business for a long time, and have a positive track record.

Melinda handles all types of travel but specializes in cruises, Europe, and wine trips.

With Melinda’s corporate experience she has also helped companies institute travel incentive programs for their employees. What better way to

heavily guided vacation, with lots of tours so I will book that for them.

Others just want to travel to a special spot and spend the week exploring it on their own. Once I know these factors, I can plan their ideal vacation for them."

I asked Melinda, as I do with most of my interviews in various fields,

motivate your staff than with a fabulous vacation bonus.

Visit www.winnerdestination.com and let Melinda make your dream trip a reality.

Phone Number:760 975 3973 email: melinda@winnerdestination.com

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Our 10th Anniversary Women of Distinction

Melissa Tucci

OFFICIAL REALTOR OF THE SAN DIEGO PADRES

By Carol Heath Photo Courtesy of Melissa Tucci

B

UYING A HOME IS MOST likely the biggest purchase you will ever make.

Before you buy a car, you will probably spend hours investigating including trips to car lots, searches on the internet and even driving the car. You rely on your opinion and the ability to make a wise decision. You can do some investigating when you buy a house, but it is not like you can live in the house for a while so you can determine if it will be a good fit for you and your family.

If you are lucky enough to be able to purchase a house in San Diego, you have someone that can make that purchase an enjoyable, knowledgeable and the best experience of your life. I’m talking about Melissa Goldstein Tucci, San Diego’s Top Realtor/Broker and the official realtor of the San Diego Padres. I will eventually get around to listing all Melissa’s awards and achievements, but before I do that, I would like to talk about Melissa, the woman, the wife, the mother.

Melissa was born in Chicago, Illinois, and grew up in a household that had 3 All American kids. Melissa’s mother was a teacher and studied until she received a Master's Degree. Her father

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was in sales, a tough business that required hard work and dedication to be successful.

Melissa’s parents, by example, instilled in her that with hard work and dedication, your aspirations are attainable.

Melissa attended college and earned a BA, and went to work in the very competitive field of sales. She sold yellow pages advertising and was very successful. Then Melissa went to work for a Check/ Credit Card guarantee service and again excelled in her job.

However, Melissa wanted a more career-oriented avenue to pursue and quickly established that her present employment was limited in achieving that goal.

Melissa decided that real estate would be her next challenge. She studied and paid close attention to how her peers conducted themselves. It did not take Melissa very long to devise a plan that would make her a top-rated realtor for Century 21. Her method was simple, at least to her, she would answer every phone call, every text, every email, that came her way within minutes of receiving them. She would answer any and all concerns her clients had. Melissa became a friend, a confidant, an advisor to her clients. She

gained their trust by being available 24/7. In fact, if you were to ask one of her clients, they would relay they felt like they were the only client Melissa had.

Melissa’s plan went beyond being available to her clients. She also incorporated, from the very beginning of her real estate career, that professionalism would be her highest aspiration. Melissa always thinks of her client’s needs before her own. She always wears a business suit and makes a point to become involved with her clients, so that she knows what they want. Melissa also helps get the right financing, assists with every aspect of the sale, and celebrates with her clients when a deal closes. You would think that would be enough, but not for Melissa.

Most of the time when a property closes and the final papers are presented and signed, that is the last you see of your realtor. Melissa stays in contact with her clients and is a lifelong resource for them. Her referrals are through the roof, but Melissa makes sure that every single client receives the very best of what she can achieve.

You wonder how she finds time for anything else, but she found time to marry and

have three beautiful daughters. Melissa also found time to study and take the test to become a broker. Being a female broker is not unheard of, but it is certainly rare, but then again so is Melissa. Her thoughts: she could better service all her clients with their transactions of buying and selling if she was a broker. So, she accepted yet another challenge and got her broker’s license.

Melissa has so much to offer her clients; however, she believes that being a techy and knowing about social media has helped her achieve the goals she has set for herself. Melissa is always a student and continues to learn anything and everything about real estate. She is considered an expert on everything there is to know about San Diego when it comes to real estate. She knows neighborhoods, schools, shopping, medical offices, and just about anything you would want to know about a potential living area. She has the technical ability to list all these things, along with a detail description and picture of every property she represents on the Internet.

I told you at the beginning of this article I would list Melissa's achievements and awards, but truthfully the article isn’t long enough to list all of them. But I would like to say Melissa was ranked #1 Coldwell Banker agent in all of California in 2016, which she now represents. May I suggest you visit Melissa’s website www.MelissaTucci. com where you can see pictures, awards, and over 600 testimonials from Melissa’s clients, most of them calling her ‘friend.’

Melissa can also be reached by phone at (619) 787-6852

Miramonte Indian Wells Resort & Spa A PLACE TO RELAX AND RECONNECT

By Debbie Storms

Photos Courtesy of Miramonte Indian Wells Resort & Spa

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IME IS A PRECIOUS commodity in our busy lives making it more important to grab the moments to rejuvenate and breathe new life into ourselves.

Achieving this goal was a lot easier than I imagined.

My two-day visit to Miramonte Resort and Spa in Indian Wells, California was a uniquely pleasing experience and worth every moment of my time. There's no denying it: our senses are the direct line into our awareness of the world and ourselves. They are a powerful force and my enjoyable experience at Miramonte accumulated into delight.

I arrived midday and was warmly and professionally greeted by the front desk staff of this boutique hotel, part of The Curio Collection by Hilton. The multi-million-dollar renovation of the resort is apparent with eclectic designer appointments in the open, elegantly casual and inviting lobby.

The resort is located on an 11-acre oasis with views of the Santa Rosa Mountains. Walkways meander through olive and citrus tree groves in addition to rose and herb gardens. The entire Mediterranean style

property is draped in gorgeous bougainvillea. Intimate spots for relaxation can be found throughout the grounds.

There are several fire pits with comfortable seating creating the perfect setting for an early evening place to enjoy a hand-crafted cocktail or just taking a break. On an evening stroll around the property, we discovered a bocce ball court and were compelled to play a few games.

The grounds offer small groves where several groups were enjoying private dinners. Quite an enticing concept and the savory smell of the dinner being served lured us to the lounge for some small bites.

The dining experience was an epicurean delight. First, the environment in both the lounge and dining room offers a variety of relaxed seating. The artistic flair did not stop there.

Citrus & Palm Restaurant's menu is filled with culinary creations by Executive Chef Paul Hancock that will pleasingly satisfy your cravings or hunger. The menu was alluring. Each item I chose was an indulgence and easily worked my way through the menu because of the tempting variations. The farm-to-

table ingredients from local Coachella farms and the chef's originality made it a memorable experience. Chef Paul is passionate about his creations. Breakfast offers house made chicken sausage, organic eggs, fruit from around

treviso, lemon aioli and salsa verde. The dinner menu is stupendous with Provencal seafood stew, seared diver scallops, Mangalista pork chops (you must inquire about the origin of the pork) and the list goes on. I was personally inspired

town and one of my favorites-lemon ricotta pancakes- to name a few.

The lunch menu offers a grass-fed-beef burger, seared tuna salad, assorted almond and cashew cheeses, king salmon with cauliflower rice and butternut basmati rice.

Need I say more? I was totally taken away by the octopus carpaccio with

to take my cooking skills up a notch or two. A delightful option is to dine outdoors on the patio with a border of foliage and bistro lights above, creating a relaxing and charming ambiance.

Yes, there is a 24-hour fitness center if you feel the urge to burn off a few of those calories. Found in a lovely setting are

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three pools at different locations on the property, one of the pools is for adults only. The main pool offers a relaxing environment with views of the mountains and Mediterranean architecture. Cabanas with comfortable lounging chairs and misters are available for a fee.

The pool area features lounge chairs, umbrellas and a bar offering food and beverages all day.

A few steps away from the dining area and pool serenity and pampering await you at an award-winning spa.

The two-story Tuscany-style building boasts nine indoor treatment rooms and three outdoor treatment spaces.

In the reception area, you'll find a spa retail shop and beverage bar with a spa menu. Outdoors you'll find a saline water therapy pool with river benches designed to offer semi-private areas with gentle waterfalls in several of the alcoves. I found this

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area very relaxing and a perfect place to unwind. There are private cabana areas that are perfect for sharing time together. The bonus is a second-floor area where soft upholstered chairs and side tables are situ-

ated in a conversational configuration. Food and beverages can be served for individuals or parties. The views from this area are stunning.

My spa experience started with a comforting consult and a short eucalyptus steam.

I found my way to the relaxation lounge which is decorated in neutral cool colors. Fresh fruit refreshments and infused water provide for a soothing libation.

My spa treatment was a 'Rain Massage.' This aromatherapy with a massage offers some unique enhancing elements. The therapist was competent and skillful, and I felt super relaxed in her care.

A spa amenity for your enjoyment is a eucalyptus-infused steam

room located in the locker room area which offers many personal touches. The array of treatments are created to give you a worldclass experience and certainly the option to choose several during your stay at Miramonte.

Packages are offered to fit your needs. Special 'Full Moon' yoga classes are featured monthly along with wellness classes. Book your trip during the Spa-Tacular Spa Party the spa event filled with mini treatments and other splendor. Call and inquire how to create a program that will enhance your life. 760-341-2200.

If you desire a day or two of golf, there are two premier 18-hole courses a short distance away.

Miramonte offers the perfect balance of event space and garden venues for planning weddings, meetings, conferences and social gatherings. The total of 35,000 square feet provides flexibility to accommodate your needs.

Views of the mountains, natural light, and European style are features that create a remarkable event.

The Miramonte Resort and Spa possess qualities that delight the senses for a time to remember!

www.miramonteresort.com 760-341-2200 Miramonte Indian Wells Resort & Spa, Curio Collection by Hilton 45000 Indian Wells Lane Indian Wells, Ca. 92210

Timeless Styles for the Curvy Bride

For a Private One-on-One Appointment Please Call or Log on to our Site at www.unveiledbrides.com Phone (442) 999-5588 Address: 205 W 5th Street, Suite 202 Escondido, CA 92025 Email: info@unveiledbrides.com Facebook: Facebook.com/unveiledbrides Instagram: unveiledbrides