I would not waste away in Margaritaville. I would thrive.
mary phillips designs®
2026
Mary Phillips Designs is a design house of fabulously fun gift and stationery all laced with biting wit and design driven style. Over the course of the past 26 years Mary Phillips’ products have been distributed worldwide, coveted by the stars, and have created partnerships with some of the most influential powerhouses in the design industry -- American Greetings, Barnes & Noble, Wine Enthusiast, Berkshire Blanket, and Andrews McMeel Publishing to name a few.
We are excited to celebrate our 26th year in business and to continue working with you! It’s and honor to bring laughter to your shops and fabulous customers Buckle up for 2026; there’s so much more to come!
Mary Phillips
Cocktail Napkins:
Each
20199
WHO IS THIS “MODERATION” WE’RE SUPPOSED TO BE DRINKING WITH?
20207
“I’M NOT OFFENDED BY DUMB BLONDE JOKES BECAUSE I KNOW I’M NOT DUMB. I ALSO KNOW THAT I’M NOT BLONDE.” - DOLLY PARTON
AS LONG AS EVERYTHING IS EXACTLY THE WAY I WANT IT I AM TOTALLY FLEXIBLE.
I FEEL SORRY FOR PEOPLE WHO DON’T KNOW US.
SOME THINGS ARE BETTER LEFT UNSAID. WHICH I GENERALLY REALIZE RIGHT AFTER I HAVE SAID THEM. Some things are better left unsaid. - Napkins
ANYONE GETTING TO THE POINT WHERE IT WOULD BE OK IF JOLENE CAME AND TOOK YOUR MAN?
20202
I WOKE UP THIS MORNING DETERMINED TO DRINK LESS, EAT RIGHT, AND EXERCISE...BUT THAT WAS FOUR HOURS AGO...WHEN I WAS YOUNGER AND FULL OF HOPE.
I DIDN’T CHOOSE THE CHAMPAGNE LIFE. THE CHAMPAGNE LIFE CHOSE ME. I didn't choose the
BEST FRIENDS DON’T CARE IF YOUR HOUSE IS CLEAN. THEY CARE IF YOU HAVE ALCOHOL.
I WONDER IF THERE IS A MARGARITA OUT THERE THINKING ABOUT ME TOO?
SO WHEN IS THIS ‘OLD ENOUGH TO KNOW BETTER’ SUPPOSED TO KICK IN?
Best Friends Don't Care If Your House Is Clean.
Margarita - Napkin
Jolene... took your man - Napkin
woke up this morning determined - Napkin
If
November 24, 2025
-Carlin Baker-Long, Crust Bread & Such Herber Springs, AR
PARTY & PAPER
Styrofoam Cups:
16 oz. Styrofoam Cups. Printing on both sides. Made in the USA. 10 cups per style. 4 sleeve minimum. $8.25 per sleeve. $33.00 per case pack.
PARTY & PAPER
4 1/4” x 5 1/2”. Blank inside. Each card and envelope comes in a clear, protective sleeve. Sold in packs of 6 cards, 6 envelopes. $2.75 each. $16.50 per case pack
EVERYBODY NEEDS A FRIEND WHO MAKES PEOPLE SAY. “OMG, THERE’S TOW OF THEM”
EVERYBODY NEEDS LEVEL-HEADED FRIENDS WHO GIVE CONSTRUCTIVE ADVICE. BUT EVERYONE ALSO NEEDS FERAL FRIENDS WHO FEED YOU WINE WHILE YOU VENT. IT TAKES A VILLAGE.
YOU WOULD BE MY EMERGENCY
BUT YOU’D LIKELY BE IN THE
WITH ME SO THAT WOULDN’T BE MUCH HELP.
18147
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU.
18139
BEST FRIENDS DON’T JUDGE EACH OTHER. THEY JUDGE OTHER PEOPLE. TOGETHER.
18144
18146
DID YOU KNOW DIET STANDS FOR “DID I EAT THAT?”
18140
A GOOD FRIEND KNOWS YOUR STORIES. A GREAT FRIEND HELPED YOU WRITE THEM.
18145
ONE DAY I’LL SOLVE ALL MY PROBLEMS WITH LOGIC AND MATURITY BUT, FOR NOW, I’LL USE COFFEE AND WINE.
18141 MY FAVORITE CHILDHOOD MEMORY IS MY BACK NOT HURTING.
18143
I’M SUFFERING FROM AN EXTREME CASE OF NOT BEING TAYLOR SWIFT. 18136 YOU ARE THE PARTY.
YOU NEVER REALIZE HOW LONG A MINUTE IS UNTIL YOU EXERCISE.
18137
LINDA HAS TWO BOTTLES OF WINE. SHE GOES TO THE STORE AND BUYS TWO MORE. WHAT DOES LINDA HAVE NOW? LINDA HAS HAPPINESS.
18142
I DON’T GET NEARLY ENOUGH CREDIT FOR THE THINGS I MANAGE NOT TO SAY.
18091 DRESS LIKE JACKIE ACT LIKE AUDREY PARTY LIKE GATSBY 18095
18125
WE’VE BEEN FRIENDS FOR SO LONG THAT I CAN’T REMEMBER WHICH ONE OF US IS THE BAD INFLUENCE.
18124
EVERYONE NEEDS A FRIEND THAT THEY PROBABLY SHOULDN’T BE ALLOWED TO SIT NEXT TO AT A SERIOUS FUNCTION.
18134
I FEEL SORRY FOR THE PEOPLE WHO DON’T KNOW
18113
WANNA COME TO THE GYM WITH ME? YOU SPELLED “BAR” WRONG.
A QUEEN DOESN’T HOPE OR WISH. SHE DECIDES.
18131 ANYONE GETTING TO THE POINT WHERE IT WOULD BE OK IF JOLENE CAME AND TOOK YOUR MAN?
18132
18135
18117
“THE BEST THINGS IN LIFE ARE FREE. THE SECOND BEST ARE VERY EXPENSIVE.”
COCO CHANEL
I DIDN’T CHOOSE THE CHAMPAGNE LIFE. THE CHAMPAGNE LIFE CHOSE ME. 18129
I MEANT TO BEHAVE BUT THERE WERE TOO MANY OTHER OPTIONS.
I STILL DON’T KNOW WHAT THE WINE STOPPER IS FOR.
OF COURSE I KNOW RIGHT FROM WRONG. WRONG IS THE FUN ONE. 18133 AND THEN THE TEQUILA WHISPERED, “SAY WHAT YOU REALLY THINK”.
18118 YOU CANNOT MAKE EVERYONE HAPPY. YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF WINE.
18130
I WASN’T SURE WHAT TO MAKE FOR DINNER SO I OPENED A BOTTLE OF WINE AND NOW I DON’T CARE. A LESSON FOR US ALL I THINK. What to make for dinner...- Greeting Card 18130
18092
A WISE GIRL KNOWS HER LIMITS. A SMART GIRL KNOWS SHE HAS NONE. -MARILYN MONROE A Wise Girl Knows Her Limits - Greeting Card
18106
& Mr.- Greeting Card
Classic Greeting Cards: “5” x 7” glossy cards. Sold in packs of 12 cards, 12 envelopes, and 1 header card. $1.25 each. $15 per case pack.
18036 THE NICE PART ABOUT LIVING IN A SMALL TOWN. WHEN YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU’RE DOING SOMEONE ELSE ALWAYS DOES.INSIDE: BLANK
PARTY & PAPER
Magnetic Notepads:
4” x 9” magnetic notepads. 50 sheets per pad. Ordered in 6’s. $3.75 each. $22.50 per case pack.
30097 I JUST DON’T THINK, AT THIS AGE, I’M MEANT TO LIVE AN UNCOMFORTABLE LIFE.
MNP- Uncomfortable Life 30097
873844003977
30098 QUEEN OF DAMN NEAR EVERYTHING.
30096 I NEED TO TEACH MY FACIAL EXPRESSIONS HOW TO USE THEIR INSIDE VOICE.
MNP- Inside Voice 30096
873844003960
MNP- Queen of Everything 30098
873844003984
30095 AND THEN THE TEQUUILLA WHISPERED, “SAY WHAT YOU REALLY THINK.”
30094 IF MY MOUTH DOESN’T SAY IT MY FACE DEFINITELY WILL.
30094
MNP - If my mouth doesn't say it
873844003946
MNP- Tequila Whispers 30095
873844003953
30093 AS LONG AS EVERYTHING IS EXACTLY THE WAY I WANT IT I AM TOTALLY FLEXIBLE.
MNP - I am totally flexible... 30093
873844003939
GIFTS
11 oz Coffee Mugs:
40004
40001
IF MY MOUTH DOESN’T SAY IT, MY FACE DEFINITELY WILL. 40002
A LOT GOING ON AT THE MOMENT
I DON’T GET NEARLY ENOUGH CREDIT FOR THE THINGS I MANAGE NOT TO SAY.
40007
CHAOS COORDINATOR
SOMEONE WHO SOLVES PROBLEMS YOU NEVER KNEW EXISTED IN WAYS THAT WILL BLOW YOUR MIND.
40003
I WISH I WAS AS THIN AS MY PATIENCE.
40006 YOU NEVER REALIZE HOW LONG A MINUTE IS UNTIL YOU EXERCISE.
40005
I’M NOT AS MEAN AS I COULD BE, AND I WANT PEOPLE TO BE MORE GRATEFUL FOR THAT.
3”x3” Stickers:
High quality, thick, waterproof, dishwasher-safe stickers. Made in the USA. Ordered in 3’s etc. $1.50 each. $4.50 per case pack.
GETTING TO THE POINT WHERE IT WOULD BE OK IF JOLENE CAME AND TOOK YOUR MAN?
WHEN IS THIS ‘OLD ENOUGH TO KNOW BETTER’ SUPPOSED TO KICK IN?
MISS THE PART IN 2020 WHEN IT WAS ILLEGAL TO COME NEAR ME.
60006
60011
SOME THINGS ARE BETTER LEFT UNSAID. WHICH I GENERALLY REALIZE RIGHT AFTER I HAVE SAID THEM. 60007 IN DOLLY
AS LONG AS EVERYTHING IS EXACTLY THE WAY I WANT IT I AM TOTALLY FLEXIBLE.
60001
“I’M NOT OFFENDED BY DUMB BLONDE JOKES BECAUSE I KNOW I’M NOT DUMB. I ALSO KNOW THAT I’M NOT BLONDE.” DOLLY PARTON
Mary Phillips Designs 2025 Top Sellers
COCKTAIL NAPKINS
1. 20190: I feel sorry for the people who don’t know us.
2. 20168: People who wonder if the glass is half empty or half full miss the point. The glass is refillable.
3. 20205: Best friends don’t judge each other. They judge other people. Together.
4. 20193: And then the tequila whispered, “Say what you really think.”
5. 20214: If my mouth doesn’t say it my face definitely will.
6. 20217: Please leave by 9.
7. 20201: I don’t get nearly enough credit for the things I manage not to say.
8. 20152: As long as everything is exactly the way I want it I am totally flexible.
9. 20203: I didn’t choose the champagne life. the champagne life chose me.
10. 20176: I meant to behave but there were too many options.
11. 20213: I wish I was as thin as my patience.
12. 20206: Just one glass away from telling everyone what I think.
13. 20184: Anyone getting to the point where it would be OK if Jolene came and took your man?
14. 20216: I wish Santa would publish his naughty list; it would be a great way to meet people
15. 20200: So when is this ‘old enough to know better’ supposed to kick in?
16. 20202: I woke up this Morning determined to drink less, eat right, and exercise...but that was four hours ago...
17. 20188: Being a functional adult every day seems a bit excessive.
18. 20197: Some things are better left unsaid. Which I generally realize right after I have said them.
19. 20172: Best friends don’t care if your house is clean. They care if you have alcohol.
20. 20170: I wonder if there is a margarita out there thinking about me too?
21. 20204: I should be ashamed of my behavior. To be clear, I’m not, but I should be.
24. 20220: Life is not a fairy tale. If you lose your shoe at mid-night you’re drunk.
25. 20209: SOUTHERN BELLE: A woman who can tell you to go to hell in such a manner that you actually look forward to the trip.
GREETING CARDS
1. 18124: Everyone needs a friend that they probably shouldn’t be allowed to sit next to at a serious function.
2. 18125: We’ve been friends for so long that I can’t remember which one of us is the bad influence.
3. 18140: A good friend knows your stories. A great friend helped you write them.
4. 18133: And then the tequila whispered, “Say what you really think”.
5. 18139: Best friends don’t judge each other. They judge other people. Together.
6. 18136: You are the party.
7. 18138: You are a fucking gem.
8. 18092: A wise girl knows her limits. A smart girl knows she has none. -Marilyn Monroe
9. 18091: Dress like Jackie. Act like Audrey. Party like Gatsby.
10. 18119: I wish retail therapy was covered by my insurance.
11 OZ MUGS
1. 40005: I’m not as mean as I could be, and I want people to be more grateful for that.
2. 40015: I just don’t think, at this age, I’m meant to live an uncomfortable life.
3. 40012: Where’s my Lorazepam?!
4. 40002: I don’t get nearly enough credit for the things I manage not to say.
5. 40004: If my mouth doesn’t say it, my face definitely will.
3” X 3” STICKERS
1. 60004: I feel sorry for the people who don’t know us.
2. 60011: As long as everything is exactly the way I want it
3. 60007: In Dolly We Trust.
4. 60013: I meant to behave but there were too many other options.
5. 60005: I don’t get nearly enough credit for the things I manage not to say.
Why Limit Happy to an Hour? A Little Book of Wit (and a Whole Lot ofAttitude) by Mary Phillips
$9.99 ($12.99 CANADA)
ISBN-13: 978-0-7407-9748-4 5 x 5 in., 64 pp, hardcover On sale: July 20, 2010
US Customers: 1-866-506-1949 purchaseorders@simonandschuster.com
Canadian Customers: 1-800-268-3216 canadianorders@simonandschuster.com
Admititalready.Lifeisalwaysbetterafter amargaritaorthree.Artistandaperitif advocateMaryPhillipsshareshercocktail witandwisdominsidethisintoxicating smash titled Why Limit Happy to an Hour?
Whetherthesubjectiscocktails,men, chocolate,weight,relatives,motherhood, orjustplainunadulteratedattitude,Phillips finds away tosum up life’s happenings one zinger at a time.
Phillipspromisestostimulatetheeconomy onedrinkata timewiththiskeepsakebook ofwitticismsfeaturingherpopularfull-color artwork and sassy one-liners.
November 24, 2025
If I've heard it once, I've heard a million times: "Oh, this is SO me," as the ladies gather around the spinner holding your napkins! After all these years, you're still a winner m'dear!
-Carlin Baker-Long, Crust Bread & Such Herber Springs, AR
We are thrilled to announce that we are one of Giftbeat magazine’s Top 10 best-selling Suppliers in the Napkin category!
Check out their September 2025 issue for more top-selling detail!
CUSTOMER SERVICE GUIDE
ORDERING INFORMATION
EXCLUSIVELY DISTRIBUTED BY:
Mary Phillips Designs Raleigh, NC 27619
Phone: 1-800-825-4575
Fax: 919-571-4861
customerservice@maryphillipsdesigns.com
www.maryphillipsdesigns.com
@mary_phillips_designs
Office Hours:
Monday – Friday 9 am – 5 pm ET (It’s really 24/7; just give us a call!)
First Time Customers:
Welcome to Mary Phillips Designs! All opening orders must reach the minimum and must be paid with a credit card. If you have any questions about opening an account with Mary Phillips Designs please contact us at customerservice@maryphillipsdesigns.com or 800-825-4575.
Order Requirements: Minimum opening order: $150.00 Minimum Reorder: $100.00 Visa, MC, Discover, AMEX are all accepted by Mary Phillips Designs.
Shipping: All shipments are Creedmoor, North Carolina shipped by UPS, USPS, unless otherwise specified. Freight charges will be incurred and invoiced as product is shipped. Freight collect damages or loss must be claimed with the carrier.
Returns: A 20% restocking fee will be charged for ALL returns. No claims will be accepted after 5 business days. No returns will be accepted after 30 days of receipt.
Damages: All claims must be made within 5 business days. Call tags will be issued by Mary Phillips Designs for any damaged product and an exchange will be sent immediately to the customer. No credits will be issued for any damaged merchandise.
SHOWROOM & SALES REPRESENTATION
ATLANTA SHOWROOM
JUST GOT 2 HAVE IT!
AL, DC, DE, FL, GA, KY, MD, MS, NC, OH, PA, SC, TN, VA, WVA Showroom B-2 1701
Backorders: We make every effort to ship orders complete. Occasionally, there will be backorders which will be shipped automatically as soon as they arrive, unless your order specifies to cancel any backorders.
Refused Shipments: All refused shipments are subject to a 20% restocking fee. If you refuse all or a portion of any shipment at the time of delivery, you will be responsible for all outbound and inbound freight costs in addition to the 20% restocking fee.
Be in the Know!
customerservice@maryphillipsdesigns.com
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