SOAPS, LIP BALMS & CANDLES!
You’ve been served.
That’s right, you’ve been served a selection of our funniest and on-point products for the upcoming Spring gift-giving season. We’ve created new soaps, candles, lip balms, and curated a collection of bestsellers. Perfect for moms, dads, teachers, and grads! And now the ball’s in your court! Happy Spring!
The limited release products in this catalog will be available to order now through June 30, 2025.
OLD-SCHOOL LIP BALM TINS
GIFTS FOR MOM
GIFTS FOR DAD
GATEWAY STARTER PACKS
GIFTS FOR TEACHERS
GIFTS FOR GRADS
AWARENESS BANDS TERMS AND CONDITIONS
New Lip Balms
Problem: It’s difficult keeping your lips
moisturized with all the boring lip balms available on the market today. Solution: Whiskey River
Old-School Lip Balm Tins. Problem solved.
Old-School Lip Balm Tins:
Made-in-USA lip balm slider tins.
Tin size: 2″ W × ⅜″ D × 1″ H.
Five different natural flavors.
Sold in 4-packs or by collection.
Counter-top display available.
Gifts for Mom
THE FAVORITE CHILD
BETTER CLOTHES SCENT
D No.
D I definitely didn’t buy myself this.
D You’re just jealous!
I WANT MY MOM
SECURITY BLANKET SCENT
D Mom makes it better
D Mom gives hugs
D Mom has cookies
SECOND MOMS
D Always there
D To listen and advise
D My second mom WARM HUGS SCENT
Classic Soap Bars:
Handmade vegan soap designed by our in-house soap artisans with fragrance blends to match each concept. Shrink-wrapped with a kraft brown label.
Dimensions: 3 ½″ L × 2 ¾″ W × 1″ H. Sold in 4-packs.
Duo Candles:
Always hand-poured and made with our exclusive blend of 100% soy wax and 0% bullshit. Fragrance blends match each concept and corresponding soap.
Dimensions: 4″ D × 2 ½″ H.
Burn time: 60 hours. Sold in 3-packs.
D A law of nature
D That in the end…
D She’s always right
SOAP MWR-S
LEMON TART SCENT
CANDLE MWR-C
GIFTS FOR MOM
MOM BRAIN
SOGGY CHEERIOS SCENT
D Pants on backwards
D Car keys in fridge
D Baby in oven
HOT MOMS
FRESH FRUIT SCENT
D Cute joggers
D Playground chic
D DILF approved
OKAY MOMS
SIPPY CUP WINE SCENT
D Pairs well with nap time
D Is also tired of perfect moms
D Your kids love you anyway
SOAP MOM-S
CANDLE MOM-C
SOAP OKA-S
CANDLE OKA-C
SOAP HMO-S
CANDLE HMO-C
GIFTS FOR MOM
For moms with killer senses of humor!
Triple Milled Soap: Made-in-USA soap bars in sturdy paperboard cartons. Sold as pre-packs of 16 or available to order individually in packs of 4. Net weight: 3 ounces. Carton size: 3 ¾″ L × 2 ½″ W × 1 ⅛″ D.
BECAUSE CHILDREN
Emergency Ambiance Candles: 100% soy wax scented with fragrance oils. Burn time: 4 one-hour emergency burns. Comes with “Emergency Ambiance” pack of matches under lid. Stainless steel tin size: 3 ⅛″ D × 1 ⅛″ H. 3-oz. candle style sold in 4-packs.
CREAMSICLE MILF-SHAKE SCENT
RESIN ’N’ ROSES SCENT S-MOM
GIFTS FOR MOM
Air Fresheners:
Designed-in-USA candle air fresheners with scents based on the original candle. Air freshener size: 3 ½″ W × 3″ H. Package size: 5 ½″ W × 6 ½″ H. Double-sided, full-color. Sold in packs of 4.
HOT MOMS
FRESH FRUIT SCENT
Great way to piss off your siblings!
FAC-F
THE FAVORITE CHILD BETTER CLOTHES SCENT
HMO-F
OGP Pencil Sets: Some styles available in our original pencil packagingl Sold in 4-packs.
GIFTS FOR MOM
Pencil Sets:
8-pack of standard No. 2 pencils made in the USA. Box size: 7 ½″ L × ¾″ W × 1 ⅜″ H. Sold in 4-packs.
OKAY MOMS
WHAT KIDS? · YAY! CHEEZ-ITS FOR DINNER! · MOMMY’S BUZZED UP CAN’T YOU JUST LEAVE MOMMY ALONE?
I NEVER DID MY HOMEWORK EITHER, KID · DOES THIS SIPPY CUP SMELL LIKE WINE? TRUST ME, I’M THE OKAYEST MOM HERE · WHERE’S YOUR FRICKIN’ FATHER?
Pen Sets:
4 black ink ballpoint click pens in a colorful and sturdy 2-piece box. Pen size: 5 ½″ L × ⅜″ W. Box size: 5 ⅝″ L × 1 ⅛″ W × 1 ⅛″ H. Sold in 4-packs.
Four vintage-style pens inside:
Longest Running Streak 2022 · TIPSY AT SCHOOL FUNCTIONS
BIGGEST DIRTY LAUNDRY PILE · Bad Housekeeping Magazine Bad Moms Association 2021 · MOST F BOMBS DROPPED TO KIDS
6-Month Family Challenge Winner · RAMEN NOODLE MARATHON
BAD MOM AWARDS
Gifts for Dad
PIPE COLLECTION SCENT
D Bad jokes
D Power tools
D Asleep by 9
SOAP DTL-S
DAD’S AFTERSHAVE SCENT
PIPE COLLECTION SET
Classic Soap Bars:
Handmade vegan soap designed by our in-house soap artisans with fragrance blends to match each concept. Shrink-wrapped with a kraft brown label. Dimensions: 3 ½″ L × 2 ¾″ W × 1″ H. Sold in 4-packs.
Duo Candles:
Always hand-poured and made with our exclusive blend of 100% soy wax and 0% bullshit. Fragrance blends match each concept and corresponding soap. Dimensions: 4″ D × 2 ½″ H. Burn time: 60 hours. Sold in 3-packs.
Bands for Dad!
See the Spring Set on page 30! Awareness
DAD’S AFTERSHAVE SCENT
D Good advice
D A plan
D Maybe some cash?
SOAP CMD-S
BEARD OIL SCENT
D The “hot guy”
D Now promoted to:
D D.I.L.F. status
SOAP MBD-S
GIFTS FOR DAD
CANDLE MBD-C
COOL DADS
CUSTOM OIL BLEND SCENT
D Mountain bike
D Designer hoodies
D Probably hot
A MAN’S MAN
BLIZZARD CAMPFIRE SCENT
D Good for bear wrasslin’
D Doesn’t talk much either
D Will drink you under the hand-hewn table
SOAP COO-S
CANDLE COO-C
SOAP MAN-S
CANDLE MAN-C
GIFTS FOR DAD
THE TROPHY HUSBAND
TRICKED-OUT PORSCHE SCENT
D Looks good on your arm
D Looks good in anything… or nothing
D Jealous much?
DAD BODS
TOASTED MARSHMALLOW SCENT
D Pairs well with couch time
D Builds unwavering confidence
D Bring me another beer
STAY WEIRD
RASPBERRY BERET SCENT
D Prolly a harmonica
D And a tall hat
D Riding a unicycle
CANDLE DAD-C
SOAP STW-S
CANDLE STW-C
CANDLE
GIFTS FOR DAD
Pencil Sets: 8-pack of standard No. 2 pencils made in the USA. Box size: 7 ½″ L × ¾″ W × 1 ⅜″ H. Sold in 4-packs.
Dad’s always good for a corny joke!
PULL MY FINGER · THAT’S HOW THEY GET YOU · HI HUNGRY, I’M DAD WORKIN’ HARD OR HARDLY WORKIN’? · BOOM, YOU’RE A SANDWICH I’M JUST RESTING MY EYES · DON’T TELL YOUR MOM · NO, YOUR OTHER RIGHT
PROCRASTINATORS
I ALWAYS WORK BETTER WHEN IT’S NEXT WEEK · LAST-SECOND CRUNCH TIME PENCIL · I’LL SHARPEN THIS LATER PROCRASTINATING IS ALSO AN ACHIEVEMENT · I’LL STUDY AFTER I CLEAN · I HAVE TO FINISH THIS NETFLIX SERIES FIRST I’LL FIND A USE FOR THIS PENCIL TOMORROW · MINDLESS DOODLING PENCIL
OGP Pencil Sets: Some styles available in our original pencil packagingl Sold in 4-packs.
GIFTS FOR DAD
Triple Milled Soap: Made-in-USA soap bars in sturdy paperboard cartons. Sold as prepacks of 16 or available to order individually in packs of 4. Net weight: 3 ounces. Carton size: 3 ¾″ L
S-MAN
GARDEN VARIETY SCENT
CILANTRO LIME SCENT S-ASS
STAY WEIRD
RASPBERRY BERET SCENT
GIFTS FOR DAD
Air Fresheners: Designed-in-USA
candle air fresheners with scents based on the original candle.
Air freshener size: 3 ½″ W × 3″ H.
Package size: 5 ½″ W × 6 ½″ H.
Double-sided, fullcolor.
Sold in packs of 4.
Introducing New Gateway Starter Packs
Introducing New “Gateway Multipack Sets.” These four sets of our best-selling soaps and candles are designed to entice new, smaller, or reticent stores to take a chance on our products. It’s an affordable option to see how the line might sell in any given location!
Shop Gateway Starter Packs
Gifts for Teachers
FAVORITE TEACHER
COOL CUCUMBER SCENT
D Cooler
D Funnier
D And that “A”
GRAMMAR POLICE
JELLY DOUGHNUT SCENT
D Your/you’re
D Their/there/they’re
D Things I’ve just learned since Facebook
TEACHERS
POISONED APPLE SCENT
D IDK, CAN you go to the bathroom?
D Don’t you dare say “Wikipedia”
D I just realized I don’t even like kids
SOAP FTE-S
CANDLE FTE-C
SOAP GRA-S
CANDLE GRA-C
SOAP TEA-S
CANDLE TEA-C
Classic Soap Bars:
Handmade vegan soap designed by our inhouse soap artisans with fragrance blends to match each concept. Shrinkwrapped with a kraft brown label. Dimensions: 3 ½″ L × 2 ¾″ W × 1″ H. Sold in 4-packs.
Duo Candles:
Always hand-poured and made with our exclusive blend of 100% soy wax and 0% bullshit. Fragrance blends match each concept and corresponding soap.
Dimensions: 4″ D × 2 ½″ H. Burn time: 60 hours. Sold in 3-packs.
GIFTS FOR TEACHERS
OGP Pencil Sets: Some styles available in our original pencil packagingl Sold in 4-packs.
Pencil Sets: 8-pack of standard No. 2 pencils made in the USA. Box size: 7 ½″ L × ¾″ W × 1 ⅜″ H.cSold in 4-packs.
GIFTS FOR TEACHERS
GRAMMAR POLICE
YOU LOST ME AT “YOUR BEAUTIFUL” · *YOU’RE · TO SERVE AND CORRECT THEY’RE GOING THERE, TO THEIR HOUSE, OK? · PUNCTUATION SAVES LIVES
OXFORD COMMA TIL I DIE · OFFICIAL GRAMMAR POLICE PENCIL · SILENTLY CORRECTING YOUR GRAMMAR
TEACHERS
IDK, CAN YOU GO TO THE BATHROOM? · I JUST REALIZED I DON’T EVEN LIKE KIDS OH YEAH? POP QUIZ, SUCKAS · I HAVE PTSD FROM GRADING PAPERS · COUNTDOWN TO SUMMER BREAK DON’T YOU DARE SAY “WIKIPEDIA” · THANKLESS TASKS PENCIL · DINNER… OR CLASSROOM SUPPLIES?
Air Fresheners:
Designed-in-USA candle air fresheners with scents based on the original candle.
Air freshener size: 3 ½″ W × 3″ H. Package size: 5 ½″ W × 6 ½″ H. Double-sided, full-color. Sold in packs of 4.
WRITER’S BLOCK
ADD A VAMPIRE · REGURGITATED IDEAS PENCIL · TRY VODKA KILL YOUR CHARACTERS · LIGHTLY PLAGIARIZE · INSERT COFFEE IV POTENTIAL MURDER WEAPON? · HIT HEAD REPEATEDLY WITH HAMMER
Gifts for Grads
Classic Soap Bars:
Handmade vegan soap designed by our inhouse soap artisans with fragrance blends to match each concept. Shrinkwrapped with a kraft brown label. Dimensions: 3 ½″ L × 2 ¾″ W × 1″ H. Sold in 4-packs.
Duo Candles:
Always hand-poured and made with our exclusive blend of 100% soy wax and 0% bullshit. Fragrance blends match each concept and corresponding soap.
Dimensions: 4″ D × 2 ½″ H. Burn time: 60 hours. Sold in 3-packs.
GIFTS FOR GRADS
MAMA TRIED
YOU’RE A PEACH SCENT
D To raise you better
D To steer you right
D Hey, she tried.
MORE COWBELL
CHRISTOPHER WALKEN SCENT
D Need
D More
D Cowbell
Someone kicked ASS in school!
Vintage-Style Paint Can Candles: 12-ounce soy wax candles handpoured into paint cans designed with vintage-style labels .
Candle can size: 3 ¼″ D × 3 ⅞″ H.
Burn time: 50 hours.
Sold in 3-packs.
WHOOP ASS
SUCKER PUNCH SCENT NOTES OF LEMON & COCONUT
SOAP TRY-S
CANDLE TRY-C
SOAP MCO-S
CANDLE MCO-C
GIFTS FOR GRADS
NEGRONI ON ICE SCENT
D VIP Scent
D Attracts attention
D As awesome as you
SOAP KBD-S
NEW STYLE!
NEW STYLE!
CANDLE KBD-C
GIFTS FOR GRADS
GIN MARTINI SCENT
I DON’T KNOW SHIT
Air Fresheners:
Designed-in-USA candle air fresheners with scents based on the original candle.
Air freshener size: 3 ½″ W × 3″ H.
Package size: 5 ½″ W × 6 ½″ H.
Double-sided, full-color.
Sold in packs of 4.
BLUEBERRY BOURBON FIZZ SCENT
WT10-F
GIFTS FOR GRADS
FUCK YEAH
BLUEBERRY BOURBON FIZZ SCENT
WT5-S
FUCK YEAH
BLUEBERRY BOURBON FIZZ SCENT
WT5-C
WTF Soap Bars: 10 different handmade vegan soap bars designed by our in-house soap artisans with fragrance blends to match each concept. Shrinkwrapped with a transparent label.
Dimensions: 3 ½″ L × 2 ¾″ W × 1″ H. Sold in 4-packs.
WTF Candles: Soy wax candle. Burn time: 40 hours.
Size: 2 ¾″ D × 3 ½″ H.
Net weight: 6.5 ounces. Sold in 4-packs.
FUCKING SHIT UP RUM PUNCH SCENT
FUCKING SHIT UP RUM PUNCH SCENT
GIFTS FOR GRADS
I DON’T KNOW SHIT TROPICAL IPA SCENT
A REAL BADASS GIN MARTINI SCENT
I DON’T KNOW SHIT TROPICAL IPA SCENT
BERGAMOT SCENT
Triple Milled Soap: Made-in-USA soap bars in sturdy paperboard cartons. Sold as pre-packs of 16 or available to order individually in packs of 4. Net weight: 3 ounces. Carton size: 3 ¾″
WT9-S
WT9-C
WT10-C
WT12-C
WT12-S
We need you to be aware of this.
Not just for disgraced former pro cyclists anymore… Our new Awareness Bands can be worn by anyone with something to say.
Awareness Wristbands:
Made-in-USA silicone wristbands with debossed and ink-filled lettering.
Dimensions: ½″ H × 4″ D. Sold in packs of 44. Ships in counter-top display box.
Spring Awareness Bands Set
BE AWARE! THESE BANDS ARE PURE FUN!
Awareness Wristbands
Spring Set:
2 units of each awareness band style; a total of 44 wristbands. Ships in counter-top display box.
TERMS & CONDITIONS
ORDER MINIMUMS:
Opening order: $200
Re-orders: $150
PAYMENT TERMS:
New accounts: Prepaid via check, money order, cash, or credit card. Established accounts: Net 30 upon approval. Credit references must be submitted at time of request.
CONDITIONS OF CREDIT:
All orders must be paid no later than 30 days from date shipped. A credit limit will be placed on your account. If your account exceeds this limit, pre-payment may be required. Customer shall pay Whiskey River Soap Company all costs, expenses, legal and collection fees as incurred in enforcing the terms and conditions as allowed by law. Whiskey River Soap Company reserves the right to revoke credit terms after 3 late payments.
PAYMENT:
Company check, money order, cash, credit card, PayPal, or ACH bank transfers.
CANCELLATIONS:
Orders may be canceled at any time. For orders already completed and ready to ship at the time of cancellation, a 25% restocking fee will be charged.
SHIPPING:
Domestic orders shipped via UPS Ground unless otherwise specified. Fantasy Destination Jigsaw Puzzles are excluded from free or discounted freight promotions. Freight charges will be determined at time of shipping and will be added to each invoice. All domestic freight charges are capped at 15% of the wholesale order total. All shipments will be charged the actual freight cost of the order(s). Rates and service subject to change at any time at the sole discretion of Whiskey River Soap Company.
CLAIMS:
Any claims for damaged or misshipped items must be made within 7 days of receipt of merchandise by notifying your sales rep. Claims must be supported with photos of product, tracking number, and outer carton.
RETURNS:
Returns are not accepted for any merchandise unless items are damaged or mis-shipped. For damaged or mis-shipped items, a return authorization number is required and must appear on all related correspondence. All returned merchandise must be received within 30 days of receipt of merchandise and be in 100% resalable condition for credit. A 25% restocking fee will be deducted for items received in poor condition and/or received
beyond the 30-day return window. Return freight is the responsibility of the customer and must be prepaid by the customer, except in case of mis-shipped merchandise.
PRICING:
All prices are subject to the real object and may change without notice. This catalog and corresponding order form’s pricing supersedes all others. Current prices are effective from January 1, 2025.
A NOTE ABOUT OUR PRODUCTS:
Soap and candles are perishable. Treat them as you would chocolate or a wounded kitten. They must be stored in cool, dry conditions to maintain optimum shelf life. Do not place products in direct sunlight or leave in warm, humid environments like a hot car or a Brazilian discotheque. All our soaps and candles are handmade, so no two look exactly alike. Expect some deviation.
INGREDIENTS:
Some of our soaps contain a few extras, like glitter. The basic ingredients (printed on each label) are: coconut oil, palm oil, safflower oil, glycerine, purified water, sodium hydroxide, sorbitol, sorbitan oleate, soy bean protein, coloring, and fragrance.
