October 2017 VOL XIV ISSUE VI SYRACUSE NEW YORK Your student fee
CONTENTS OCTOBER 2017 In(toxic)ated 24 Blacking out is practically a conversational staple on campus—seriously just walk through Schine and listen. But peek behind the fun, shiny curtain of drinking culture here, and there lies a sick mess. Take a deeper look into a topic you likely already became acquainted with in some way : the typical hospitalization process for alcohol use at SU.
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EDITOR'S LETTER FEEDBACK PEEPS CLICKBATE
Synced 38 Androgynous fashion’s done nothing but play it safe: with neutral colored clothing in baggy fits, it speaks more potato sack than unisex. We experiment with wild prints, vibrant hues, and unexpected cuts. Screw the vanilla vibes; this issue Jerksyncs androgyny with modern times.
Girls, Girls, Girls 48
Upstate New York has been a hot bed of feminist political activity since the first wave. We traced through the local women and groups who have worked to dismantle patriarchy since 1800s. 4 10.17
Cover Design by Chelsea Portner Photography by Sam Lee
10 JERK THIS What you should hit up and bitch about this month.
NOISE ARTS & MUSIC 52
CAFFIENE FIX Put your nose to the grind and learn about your beans.
REWIND LGBTQ+ History Month
NO JUDGEMENT Migos
AMPLIFIED Morning Wars
11 21 +/Maple Bourbon Sour 13 TOTALLY UNSCIENTIFIC POLL Fresh Meat 14 SEX Juicy Deets 15 FRAMED Limbo
BITCH OPINIONS 16
BACK OF BOOK
Just another shaky, boring COM 117 video . 18
ALTAR EGO In the name of all that is holy.
ALL THE WAY UP Get a new perspective.
CHEWED OUT Cupcakes and cappucinos are ruining the neighborhood.
CRUEL INTENTIONS Think twice before you send that risqué snap.
OUT WITH A BANG We ain't afraid of no ghost.
SKIN DEEP Clothes, clothes, some shoes and more clothes.
DISCOVERSYR Jello Museum
SPEAKEASY Jennifer Grygiel
OBITCHUARY The Old Taylor Swift
CLOSET CASE Things get furry when we look inside closets this month.
FORM AND FUNCTION How to Dress Like a Horse Girl
Chelsea Portner EDITOR IN CHIEF
EDITORIAL FEATURES EDITOR
Alex Archambault ASST. FEATURES EDITOR Caroline Blair ARTS AND MUSIC EDITOR Deniz Sahinturk ASST. ARTS AND MUSIC EDITOR Jake Smith OPINIONS EDITOR Bronte Schmit ASST. OPINIONS EDITOR Audrey Lee STYLE EDITOR Hairol Ma ASST. STYLE EDITOR Nick Della Sala ASST. STYLE EDITOR Hayley Greason FRONT OF BOOK EDITOR McKenna Moore RESEARCH EDITOR Callie Chute COPY EDITOR Jacqui Meuser, Matti Gellman, Sophia Jactel FACT CHECKER Taylor Connors, Emily Kelleher, Madison Snyder FRESHMAN INTERN Vivian Whitney, Katherine Flynn, Emily Lewis WEB DIGITAL DIRECTOR
Tiffany Moran WEB EDITOR Kate Kozuch ASST. WEB EDITOR Emily Gnat, Joann Li, Joey Dawson WEB DESIGNER Becky Savoia PHOTO EDITOR Alyssa Smith MULTIMEDIA MULTIMEDIA EDITOR
Laura Kellerman ASST. MULTIMEDIA EDITOR Grace Crummett ASST. MULTIMEDIA EDITOR Lauren Burrell SOCIAL EDITOR Jordan Cramer SOCIAL EDITOR Alexis EauClaire ASST. SOCIAL EDITOR Sarah Prosser
DESIGN DESIGN DIRECTOR
Yingying Yue Jacob Marcus, Sam Adams, Ilana Shire, Jennifer Sachs, Vivian Whitney DESIGNERS
ART ILLUSTRATION DIRECTOR
Maddi Minicozzi Kasey Lanese STAFF PHOTOGRAPHERS Sam Lane, Leigh Ann Rodgers, Kali Bowden, Zoey Peck, Molly Colletta ILLUSTRATORS Emily Bruder, Maddie Ligenza, Rachel Gee, Chloe Crookall PHOTOGRAPHY DIRECTOR
PUBLIC RELATIONS COMMUNICATIONS DIRECTOR
Sydney Stein Lillee Bellia, Julia Susskind, Georgiana Volturo, Alana Smolinksy, Hadassah Lai PR DESIGNER Olivia Sharf PR REPRESENTATIVES
Catie Anderson Caitlin Shewbrooks
CONTRIBUTORS Divya Murthy, Kelsey Thompson, Thomas Beckley, Krystal Silfa, Naomi Duttweiler, Michelle Jordan, Rebecca Ahmed, Lydia Herne, Steohanie Peter, Annie Schawtz, Alena Sceusa, Tori Thomas, Laura Norton
Melissa Chessher ADVISER Through its content, Jerk is dedicated to enhancing insight through communication by providing an informal platform for the freedom of expression. The writing contained within this publication expresses the opinions of the individual writers. The ideas presented in this publication do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the Jerk Editorial Board. Furthermore, Jerk will not be held responsible for the individual opinions expressed within. Submissions, suggestions, and opinions are welcomed and may be printed without contacting the writer. Jerk reserves the right to edit or refuse submissions at the discretion of its editors. Jerk Magazine is published monthly during the Syracuse University academic year. All contents of the publication are copyright 2014 by their respective creators. No content may be reproduced without the expressed written consent of the Jerk Editorial Board.
LETTER FROM THE EDITOR
GET REAL If you think you know you are, good for you. I walked onto campus freshman year, a confused journalism major, with a fresh pair of white Converse and unwavering thirst to make friends. I slapped on a choker, tried my first tequila shots, tried to start reading the New York Times— basically everthing I now hate. And I thought I would have my life figured out by senior year. I was hoping to find the sweaty pit that is DJ’s less enticing, know exactly where I want to end up in my career and be incredibly self-assured. But here I am, still dragging myself to happy hour on Thursdays and wondering if neon yellow Vans are actually cool. The only thing I’ve become sure of in my four years is that the path to who I am becoming is long and winding and full of half eaten containers of lo mein. And that’s okay. This issue, we made it our mission to find the people who are living their lives the only way they know how. Find a former porn star turned minister on page 24, talking about how religion illuminated her path for her. Learn about the trials and tribulations of a blackout, the only way students here think to escape who they are on page 24. Celebrate every color and style and shape with our Gawk feature on page 48. And embrace your inner horse girl on page 67. Maybe these stories will help you find a little piece of yourself. And if no one else gets it, than screw em’ and keep doing you. Keep it real,
HATE MAIL We think we’re pretty great, so keep us in check and keep the shit talk coming. In response to May's Form and Function. Jerk would like to apologize for this poorly executed satire. Our bad. Keep calling us out, team:
SHOW US SOME LOVE Jerk Magazine 126 Schine Student Center Syracuse, NY 13244
In response to the interview we posted with former bachelorette, Rachel Lindsay, on jerkmagazine.net:
@jerkmagazine firstname.lastname@example.org jerkmagazine.net
And thanks for keeping a watch on our typos. But if you’re actually mad about this, we’re probably mad at you:
FOLLOW, DON’T LEAD youtube.com/jerkmagazine
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contributors Photography by Kasey Lanese
DIVYA MURTHY / Junior / Altar Ego Murthy can’t stand seeing bugs get stepped on, so please do your squishing far away from her. She’s in a committed relationship with spicy food and doesn’t believe vegetables have any place in coffee—looking at you, PSL. Check out her feature on a porn star turned minister, on page 24.
CIARA BETHEL / Senior / Synced The 21st night of September is the best holiday of the year for this funk enthusiast. If she could go back in time, she would meet Earth Wind & Fire at their peak. On page 38, she shows off her design magic on our androgynous Gawk feature.
KELSEY THOMPSON / Junior / Out with a Bang Thompson has a lot of opinions. Some of them are bad, like thinking sweet potatoes with peanut butter on top are a tasty treat. Some of them are good, like thinking the best joke she’s ever heard is Stephen Colbert’s on Trump: “The only thing your mouth is good for is being Vladimir Putin’s cock holster.” Read about her opinion on hookup culture and ghosting on page
JERK JERK THIS THIS
Stranger Things Season 2
Sampling Syracuse Food Tours
October 27 Take another trip to The Upside Down this month with Eleven, Will, Mike, Dustin, and Lucas. Justice for Barb!
Every Saturday through Nov. 4 Eat your way through downtown Syracuse on a crisp (or hot as hell because climate change) Saturday afternoon. For $41, you get a three-hour walking tour of the area and the chance to sample a ton of dope food.
Film Talks with Director Jack Sholder October 13 The MOST is hosting this horror director on Friday, October 13th and screening some of his work. And the event is free. Does it get any spookier?
Shit we like
Two new Harry Potter books October 20 Harry Potter - A Journey Through the History of Magic and Harry Potter - A History of Magic will allow us to feel a little spark of magic one more time in our lives.
Columbus Day October 9 Columbus didn't discover shit, he just brought genocide to America. And we don't even get the day off. Catch us celebrating Indigenous People's Day.
Shit we like to avoid
National Boyfriend Day
October 27 The world is saturated with Saw movies. No one asked for another one, yet here we are getting one.
October 3 Men are trash (#NotAllMen, ha).
Uncle Kracker at The Westcott October 15 $28 is just too much to pay to go to a concert as a joke.
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Halloweekend(s) Late October We're tired of thinking of 12 different costumes to wear for the multiple Halloweekends at 'Cuse. When does it end??
Maple Bourbon Sour
Our library's best-kept secret.
Photography by Kasey Lanese
Are you a sophisticated young adult? Do you just love the taste of bourbon warming your insides on a crisp fall day? Then sidle up to the makeshift bar in your shitty off-campus apartment and break out the syrup. Lemon juice, bourbon and maple syrup are the only ingredients you need to feel like one classy bitch with this Maple Bourbon Sour.
Ingredients: 6 Tablespoons Bourbon 2 Tablespoons Maple Syrup 2 Tablespoons Lemon Juice ½ Cup Ice
Directions: Throw it all—or pour it, whatever you’re feeling—into a glass. Stir that shit. Drank.
CLICKBATE What We're Getting Off To On The Web This Month
JERKMAGAZINE.NET Take your memes somewhere else.
Smell the Roses
Gawk: Behind the Scenes
We got the lowdown in an exclusive interview with Season 13 Bachelorette Rachel Lindsay. She talks college, making out in front of cameras, and love advice for those of us maxed out on Tinder swipes.
If you're craving more bold androgynous fashion after looking through this issue's Gawk feature, check out our video on how the photoshoot happens. The Gawk team breaks all the usual unisex norms as they bring their daring vision to life.
Don't Blow Your Cover
After a long hard day of hoarding an outlet at Bird, you need something to take the edge off. Look out for our how-to video on making this simple sophisticated drink.
Safe sex is great sexâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;and SU has a new way to keep you covered. Read up on the progressive new intiatives on campus to encourage sexual health and wellness.
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TOTALLY UNSCIENTIFIC POLL
FRESH MEAT When you’re a freshman, being a freshman is the fucking best. But as soon as you exit that disgusting time of low-standards and cheap booze, you realize that it truly was a giant shitshow. We asked freshmen and upperclassmen alike about their frosh fuckups. Would you make out with a stranger in line for DJ’s? 49% - I’m WAY too classy for that, but I would definitely swap spit in line for Flip Night 29% - You gotta get some when you can, man 27.1% - Not yet, but it’s on the frosh bucket list right next to doin’ the dirty in the Bird stacks What’s the worst thing you’ve ever done in your dorm room? 42.8% - Touched someone ~inappropriately~ while my roommate was in the room 37.5% - Smoked the ganja — WITHOUT putting a hat over the smoke detector 14.5% - Projectile vomited all over my roommate’s side of the room 5.3% - I’ve already been written up Which freshman accessory can you not leave home without? 71.8% - A handle of flavored Svedka 19.9% - A Syracuse lanyard hanging effortlessly out of my pocket 8.3% - That fresh Syracuse Class of 2021 T-shirt
What is your Freshman Personality Type? 26.3% - The Scared Shitless of Upperclassmen and Everything Else College Has to Offer 25% - The Try Hard 17.3% - The GrubHub is My Best Friend and I Never Leave my Dorm Room 16% - The I Actually Care About Syracuse Athletics and Go to the Games After the Tailgates 15.4% - The Only Thing I Care About is Partying How do you feel about upperclassmen? 38.5% - They’ve been surprisingly nice and welcoming 37.8% - I just know they’re gonna haze the shit out of me when I pledge 23.7% - I really fucking wish they would stop mooing at me Are you planning on rushing this spring? 47.7% - Wrap me up in letters and call me PNM 32.9% - I can’t decide and it’s STRESSING ME OUT 19.4% - I’m super into thinking for myself, so I’m gonna pass
Juicy DEETS When the sex gets wetter than expected, we want to be the first to know. This month's juiciest sexual encounters won't dampen your mood.
The Elusive Massachusetts White Dragon
The Banana to her Split
I once told my parents I was staying over at a friend’s house nearby but actually traveled to Massachusetts to stay the night in a motel with my ex. Long story short, I came in his mouth and my seed shot back out through his nose, aka a white dragon. During my high school’s senior scavenger hunt, teams were given a list of crazy tasks. My team gave me the privilege of completing the stickiest task: having my boyfriend make an ice cream sundae in my vagina and eating me out.
I met an Italian chef at a cheese conference in Tampa. He invited me to try his hand-pulled mozzarella di bufala, but I was more interested in trying his pepperoni—if you know what I mean. So we headed up to his room and as soon as the door closed, it was on. We had been going at it for a while when he announced the alfredo—read: his cum— was ready to be served. The sauce wasn’t as tasty as expected.
LIMBO Ashley Blake Fifth Year, Environmental and Interior design "The State of Free Fall discusses emotive qualities during the period of transition. The underlying tone of temporality defines the only thing consistent, which is time."
To showcase your work on "Framed," email email@example.com.
PLAYING FAVORITES Our favorites shouldn't be the only ones in the spotlight.
By Krystal Silfa : Illustration by Emily Bruder Believe it or not, Syracuse is home to some of the most eccentric people on this earth— depending on who you ask. If you go to Syracuse University, you’ve probably heard of some of them: DPS officer Joe Shanley, aka Officer Friendly, The Flying Bus Man, Meghan Sinisi, SU’s Orange Girl—the list goes on. But what about everyone else in the community? While it’s important to recognize some of Syracuse’s most beloved individuals, there’s a downside to this constant coverage on a select few. This series of reruns ultimately results in barring other exceptional members of the community. We need to embrace the community as a whole, not just a few standouts. The decisions of newspapers, radio shows, and COM 117 projects to focus on the same people creates a bubble around the university. This trend only widens the rift created by the geographic wall between the university and community around it. It causes students to be unaware of all the other important people in the community. Overexposure quiets the myriad of other accomplishments from others in the area, as the student magazines or film projects are focused on Officer Friendly or Otto the Orange. It would be nice if we shed
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light on figures like, Taywana James, otherwise known by the name Mother Earth—how cool is that?—who opened up Syracuse’s first little free library, a nationwide nonprofit organization that provides a space for a community to exchange books and promote literacy. Celebrating four or five individuals out of a population of over 140,000 people seems counterproductive and doesn’t give a true testament to Syracuse’s rich and vibrant culture. It’s important to give recognition where recognition is due. Excessively retelling popular stories promotes a narrowminded depiction of SU. Students can get involved with organizations such as InterFaith Works, a local refugee settlement program that has been working for the community since 1981. Despite their credibility and good work, few know about the organization which, in light of Trump’s presidency, could certainly use extra volunteers. Another nonprofit organization is Media Unit. They are “focused on sharing stories through performance to the city of Syracuse,” and even implemented an arts festival this past summer. There are so many incredible programs and people that many don’t even know about unless
you look it up or go into the community. Take a look at the exceptional engineering students who are building prosthetic hands or those responsible for organizing the Slut Walk. Or for some extra spice in your life, take a look at Syracuse’s potato rapper ToTs. His rhymes about the greatest side dish coupled with his backup dancers, the Fry Girls, are sure to create a sizzle. With just a little bit of research, you could find out about and even contribute to them if you so fancy. There are programs on campus, like PROJECT
G.R.I.N.D.—an enrichment program where students tutor middle school kids—that get involved with the community. Your time at Syracuse may be short term, but think about leaving a lasting impression on the community by getting involved. Certain figures in the commnity are beloved for a reason, so it is valid to enjoy Syracuse’s few local celebrities. But what can you do next? Research and go out into the community to learn more about all the great things happening in the nearby area and the people behind them. JM
Chewed Out Your hipster bar is really only hurting housing. By Thomas Beckley-Forest : Illustration by Alena Sceusa
The pattern is a recognizable one for most of us. For whatever reason—be it a series of buy-ups and renovations by savvy landlords, some “urban revitalization” project, or the sheer magnetism of cheap rents—a historically marginalized residential area becomes more desirable to young professionals. Sometimes—see New York City— this spillover is partly the result of a hyper-inflated real estate market. Yuppies are drawn to the low cost of living in Rust Belt cities like Buffalo and Syracuse, especially those raised in pristine or otherwise monocultural white suburbs. This tendency, of which I myself am guilty, is to fetishize these spaces of post-industrial neglect as embodying some ideal of grimy, “authentic” bohemian chic. 18 10.17 • JERK
One way to put it: “Gentrification is when white people move to the hood and open up a bunch of goddamn cupcake shops.” Sometimes gentrification takes several years, even decades. In other cases, the rate has been truly dizzying. But eventually, that trickle becomes a torrent of middle class 20-and30-somethings that represents a considerable enough demographic shift to remake the balance of economic power in a community. This is the point at which a certain type of entrepreneur will sense their opening in a growing demand for businesses that cater to a certain sensibility. Tykemia Carman recently opened an artisanal cupcake shop: Crave, on James Street in Syracuse’s Eastwood neighborhood. Also new
BITCH to downtown Syracuse is Original Grain, a “fast-casual” eatery that co-partner, Matt Godard, asserts will bring a more “West Coast” influence to the area. It’s not surprising that Godard has a knack for curating those coastal vibes. Being the founder and owner of the growing local Cafe Kubal artisanal coffee chain, he’s in build-the-artisanal-empire mode. His partners in the Original Grain venture are associated with businesses in downtown Syracuse’s trendy revival as well. Eric Hinman owns the subtly branded Urban Life Athletics gym, and Chris Bily is a former partner in the slick Modern Malt diner in Armory Square. So, what’s the catch? For a local neighborhood bled dry of resources, this influx of investment would seem to be a shining gift. But who is it for, exactly, and what services are being offered? These businesses seem to offer quality-conscious—read: more expensive—alternatives and addendums to the consumer options of the young professionals who are gradually moving in, and others who commute to work in downtown ‘Cuse. This shouldn’t necessarily be a problem. These are local entrepreneurs who’ve had the audacity and tenacity to launch their own ventures in a long-desolate market, offering quality goods and services to people who will pay for them. But when we take into account the history of Syracusans’ access to food over the past several decades, it becomes apparent that there may be something obscene about the luxurious cupcakes and organic “West Coast” groceries being hawked by these new businesses. The Near Westside gained notoriety for the fact it had long been serviced
almost solely by a single grocery, the Nojaim Brothers Super Market. The small Gifford Street shop run by the eponymous local businessmen, while prospering for years, is set to close in the upcoming year. It’s not alone in respect to this relative isolation. For many years, the Southside of Syracuse was classified as a “food desert.” The new Price Rite that opened on South Ave this April is a start toward alleviating some of the issues Southsiders have long faced. However, the process of providing the bare minimum of first world amenities— access to groceries and related goods— to these areas is a sluggish one that receives little fanfare compared to a slickly branded effort like Original Grain. It caters to a niche consumer base with at least a decent amount of disposable cash while the other drastically changed the lives of many in a historically disadvantaged area. This type of hypocrisy is ubiquitous in gentrification efforts nationwide, but is especially difficult to address in places like Syracuse. Much like Buffalo, where I grew up, the post-industrial decline and brain-drain is truly debilitating. Any detraction from businesses that have chosen to reoccupy that haunted space is regarded as almost unpatriotic, as if these artisanal raconteurs were soldiers of some sort. I suppose they are the gallant heroes of the blandly optimistic urban-renewal narratives so many of us like to tell ourselves. In reality, they are building their bridges to success over newly consolidated communities of privilege. The rest of the community, as usual, goes largely ignored and untouched by this process.JM
Cruel Intentions Sexually-based offenses are especially heinous. By Deniz Sahniturk : Illustration by Tori Thomas
When I first heard of revenge porn, I was a clueless kid, propped up on the couch watching Desperate Housewives with my mom. Model-turned-housewife, Gabrielle Solis, told her husband Carlos that an ex-boyfriend posted nude pictures of her online. Legally, she couldn’t do anything since she gave him the pictures herself. The episode ended with Carlos throwing the ex-boyfriend through a window screen. This heroic gesture turned out to be futile, as Gabrielle’s gardeners still found her nude photos online. To my 10-yearold self—who probably shouldn’t have been watching the show in the first place—none of this meant much. I didn’t understand what nudes were, why people would enjoy them, or why anyone would want to post them online to hurt someone. Yet, 11 years later, here I am watching another revenge porn incident unfold— this one in real life—the well-publicized incident between Rob Kardashian and Blac Chyna. If you missed the feud on social media, Rob Kardashian broke up with his baby mama, Blac Chyna, after
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she cheated on him. Instead of leaving it there, he posted explicit images of her on Instagram, accompanied by a lengthy rant with his “reasoning.” His account was suspended, Chyna pressed charges, and the Twitterverse went nuts. You could consider an incident like this a rarity a mere decade ago—the showrunners of Desperate Housewives were probably trying to bring awareness to a new issue. Now, not so much. One in every 25 Americans say they have been victims of revenge porn—not to mention that women, minorities, and the LGBT community are 10 percent more likely to be victims, according to a study done by the Center for Innovative Public Health Research. Given how
large these numbers are, you would assume there would be extensive laws in place that ban the act. But as of now only 38 states have criminalized revenge porn—and persecution differs by state. In New York State, this legal discussion has only just begun. A privileged celebrity like Blac Chyna won’t be affected by this lack of legal protection. Surely she’ll go through the same emotional trauma all victims of revenge porn go through, but she also has the means to hire expensive lawyers and continue her career after one apologetic press release. Us little people on the other hand, are never that lucky. When laws aren’t enough to protect the people, cases like those of victim turned activist, 34-year-old Holly Jacobs from California, become a fight for human. Jacobs became a victim of revenge porn after an ex decided to punish her for moving on. She attended to a wedding with her boyfriend and later posted a picture of them on Facebook. A couple days later, her nude pictures were on 200 websites, and her life turned into a living hell. She spent a month complaining to the websites demanding they take her pictures down and she succeeded—momentarily. The next week her pictures were up on 300 new websites. She deleted her social media accounts, paid $500 to change her name, had to quit her job, and have several uncomfortable conversations with her professors. Since revenge porn was not considered a crime in California, she had no way of getting retribution. She ended up becoming
an activist who made sure revenge porn was criminalized in the state of California. Back in 2009, when Jacobs first became a victim, laws against revenge porn were nonexistent. Now, due to the efforts of victims like Jacobs, there is some protection—emphasis on “some.” Thirty-eight states and Washington D.C. have laws against revenge porn, true, but in their current state they’re far from efficient. Up until this summer, to seek legal action in North Carolina against someone for revenge porn, you had to have been in a relationship with them and given them pictures yourself. Your stalker took pictures of you dressing up without your knowledge and posted them online? Sorry, we can’t help you. Even if you are lucky enough to live in a state that has laws against revenge porn, a fight against such an attack can still take years and be extremely costly. Holly Jacob’s case came to a close after a six-year-long, traumatic ordeal, but just this March, thousands of Marine Corps women had their photos shared by active-duty and Marine veterans in a Facebook group. There is a Defense Department criminal investigation has been launched, but a productive and just resolution looks to be elusive. Revenge porn is a crime that scars a person and ruins their entire life, yet it’s hardly taken seriously. We need better laws against it and we need to punish those who partake in it. And once we do, only then will victims like Holly Jacobs will feel like their trauma wasn’t in vain.JM JERK
OUT WITH A BANG Because commitment is hard.
By Kelsey Thompson : Illustration by Maddie Ligenza
Defined by Jerk as when you’ve been left on read post hookup, ghosting is as commonplace in college culture as rallying to a 9:30 a.m. class after a night of blacking out. When it comes to the college dating pool, there’s one things millennials commit to most: a lack of commitment. Casual sex isn’t this revolutionary concept created by a couple of wannabe hipsters with a Tinder account and an adequate sex drive, but you’d think so given its persistence on college campuses. In a 2015 Pew Study, 45 percent of millennials admitted to having casual sex at least once with a non-committed partner. With less emphasis and fewer social taboos surrounding premarital sex and sexuality than in the past, the expectations for commitment have fallen to the wayside in favor of “less complicated” methods of sexual gratification. But is casual sex really less complicated? From personal experience, a casual hookup is like the Hawaiian pizza of dating in college. The opposite of fine wine,
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hookups often start off sweet and turn sour as time progresses. The main problem? A lack of communication, which inevitably results in someone catching feelings and a cold shoulder when their sexual partner decides they’re no longer interested, and falls off the face of the earth. Joseph Fanelli, an SU Child and Family Studies professor specializing in human sexuality, said the problem with casual sex and the culture surrounding it is the lack of conversations defining what the hookup is and where both individuals want it to lead. “Part of the dilemma for young adults is the ambiguity of our hookup experiences and our struggle to talk about sexuality,” Fanelli says. A major contributing factor to miscommunications between sexual partners and subsequent ghosting lies in two key questions: how you define sex and what sex means to you. “For different people, sex might be just pleasure, or a relationship and intimacy, or a baby and procreation,” he said. “If you’re
BITCH looking for a relationship, and I’m only looking for a masturbatory toy, wouldn’t you want to know that?” Considering you’re likely to have a more riveting conversation talking to a wall about its feelings than an emotionally unavailable college student, it’s no surprise many people end up expecting more out of a relationship than they bargained for, leading to the ever-painful, frustrating and rage-inducing experience of ghosting. Ghosting is especially problematic in hookup culture given the digital nature of our relationships and the lack of grounding they have in reality. From apps like Tinder and Bumble to the infamous “Netflix and Chill” and “sliding into DMs,” so much of our sexual intimacy extends from digital connections. While there’s nothing wrong with a late night rendezvous making out with your side piece or swiping right online, there’s less pressure to commit to a physical relationship or consider the consequences of miscommunications when so much of it isn’t face-to-face. “Relationship building is such an important part of our human experience,” says Fanelli. “With casual sex, there often is a lack of communication that postpones how we learn to build and communicate our feelings and relationships.” Even if you engage in a hookup without the expectations of a relationship, there’s a certain level of trust you put into this person that goes above and beyond the physical mechanics of sex. When there’s a personal connection along with a sexual one, it’s especially hard to have the hookup end out of the blue without feeling a lack of closure or an increasing sense of self-consciousness and anxiety. Beyond frustration or anger can come a sense of inadequacy and questions of whether or
not you were good enough. In this sense, diminished self-worth goes even further. Fanelli described hookup sex as often being male-centric, where the main focus of sex is on male pleasure. Beyond being sexist and disrespectful toward female’s needs and sexual gratification, it also creates an imbalanced power dynamic that can leave a woman’s self-esteem dependent on whether or not her sex was good enough for his satisfaction. “What’s okay for men and what’s okay for women in hookup culture is clearly unbalanced,” says Fanelli. “I also think that we, as a culture, have not experienced the sexual liberation for women that we claim to have had. To be liberated means to be empowered and to be able to say yes or no, and what I worry about with the hookup experience is that I don’t want the male experience to be the standard for women should aspire for. You can do it if that’s what you want to do, but not because you feel like you have to.” Just as hookups and casual sex are often about instant gratification, flirting becomes all about how quickly and easily sex is attainable and less about getting to know one another. More importantly, there’s a failure to clarify each other’s expectations for where a relationship is going. While no one should be scorned for engaging in casual sex, it’s important to set the groundwork for where a candid partnership that can freely communicate if the connection extends beyond the confines of the bedroom. What matters most in college hookup culture isn’t someone’s body count or their definition of sex, but communicating what they want for themselves and where they see things going. JM
INTOXICATED Blacking out on the weekend is all too familiar for college students. Jerk looked into the consequences of severe intoxication and what actually happens when you’re transported to the hosptial. By Alex Erdekian : Illustration by Jacob Marcus
During my first Abnormal Psychology class this semester, we started with an exercise where we read theoretical scenarios about people's behavior and then discussed if each problem was psychologically “normal” or not and why. One case described a female college student who drinks and parties three or four times a week and frequently ends the night vomiting, blacking out, or stumbling into risky sexual encounters. “Who thinks this woman has a psychological disorder?” my professor asked the class. Just a few hands in the 100ish person sized lecture went up. “And who thinks this is normal?” she contrasted, as the majority of the hands in the room went up. Then she asked us, “Let’s say this woman is actually 35. Now who thinks this is abnormal?” Nearly every hand in the auditorium shot up. It turns out the theoretical blurb we read in class is the reality for a lot of students here. Fall 2016 alone, from the start of school through early November, totaled 196 alcohol caused student transports to the ER, 24 10.17
according to a Syracuse University Senate report from last year. The same report shows an average of 10-12 students per week were taken to the emergency room for alcohol problems during the 2015-2016 school year. By March of 2016, the academic year wracked up a total in the high 200s, surpassing the year before. And this year on Sunday, September 9 (read: Juice Jam), five students were hospitalized for alcohol intoxication. The data on 2017’s total amount of student hospitalizations is currently unavailable. After initially agreeing to be in the story, SUA declined to comment and stopped responding after multiple attempts to contact them. Side note on this data: it doesn’t include students who were picked up by ambulances excluding SUA, in which case hospitals can’t report cases of students 18 and older to SU due to privacy and confidentiality rights When I was entering SU as a freshman in fall of 2014, SU was ranked the nation’s No. 1 party school by Princeton Review. But despite the chancellor’s attempt to polish
SMUT the hell out of ‘Cuse’s image (remember the whole “Save Cuse” campaign, anyone?), the more dangerous consequences of partying don’t seem to be slowing down anytime soon when you look at the numbers. Data shows that first and second year students account for the greatest number of transports according to DPS, but keep in mind that this data is skewed in some ways because many of these calls happen in dorms and on campus. Scientists have identified two types of blackouts: en bloc—when you forget everything—and fragmentary—when you forget some things and remember others (often dubbed in college kid-speak “browning out”). I talked to two of my fellow senior classmates who’ve been transported via SUA to the ER when they were underclassmen. Between 35-50 percent of college students have blacked out once, according to the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism. That was the case for these students, whose nights getting transported were replayed back to them by friends and hospital bills in their mailboxes. Maddie’s* third week into sophomore year, she went to an “around the world” party—a party that involves drinking types of alcohol from all different countries (i.e. sake for Japan, Guinness for Ireland)—with her sorority. She drank three tequila shots, gulped down liquor from an ice luge, and was handed a Monster energy drink. She didn’t expect the amount she drank to get her hammered, but soon enough she was, and ended up walking back to her dorm alone. She doesn’t remember it, but she found out after the fact that she was opening
people’s doors, walking around until she finally ended up in her room. Soon after, her RA found her passed out on her desk in a puddle of black vomit. She woke up in the ambulance on the way to Crouse. For Maddie, one of the most upsetting aspects of being transported was that the consequences of the night seemed to follow her long after. After receiving her punishment from the Office of Student Rights and Responsibilities. she found out she would have to attend a counseling session, write a short paper about what she learned, and meet with the dean of her school. She says she already felt awful
“I think people would be beyond shocked at how much we see here.”
-- Missy Domachowske, Crouse Hospital social worker
enough, and these added requirements only made her feel worse. The Office of Student Rights and Responsibilities did not respond to media requests and emails asking for information for this story. Maddie says that if she could talk to someone who was transported, she would tell them that it’s nothing to be ashamed of and doesn’t have to define them or their drinking habits. Research shows that drinking games are one of the most common activities likelylike landing in the hospital, the directorof SU’s Psychological Services Center clinic, Afton Kapuscinski says.
SMUT She coincidentally is also the professor of the class I opened with to start this story. James* and his friend challenged each other to a drinking contest his freshman year. After going to a string of house parties way too sober the weekend before, they were on a mission to get drunk—they agreed on a shot for shot competition. They each tallied on their arm with a sharpie for every shot. After the first hour, him and his friends both hit 13 tallies. Before leaving for an off campus party, the marks on their arm totaled 16. Eventually, after peeing in the attic of the party he was at and then throwing up later, his friends called an ambulance. When the staff asked him—wearing just a bathrobe, T-shirt, sunglasses, and underwear—“what day is it?” to test his sobriety, he replied “Thanksgiving.” He was only at Crouse Hospital for roughly half an hour before being shuttled back to his dorm. He echoed Maddie’s sentiments on the social stigma of his night being one of the toughest parts of the incident. “I felt a lot shame. I mean I was definitely mad at myself. But I think I was more mad that I put my friends through that, especially since it was November of freshman year. So it just kind of felt weird them taking care of me for the night.” He was so scarred after the fact that he didn’t take a shot for a full year after the incident and says in general hasn’t had that much hard liquor ever since. Crouse Hospital’s Emergency Services Chief and Medical Director, David Mason MD, says the ER is most congested with intoxicated SU students the first few weekends of the school year, concerts like Juice Jam and Mayfest, big game days, and during Greek Life initiation seasons. This
isn’t shocking news by any measure to anyone who lives above ground, but these events make up a lot of the 36ish weekends in that span from students’ typical arrivals and departures from campus in an academic year. So drinking culture is a thing on campus—we know that. But what students don’t always think about when slamming down shots at a pregame are the people who will be cleaning up after their quite often literally sh*tty—and sometimes scary—mess: On an average night at Crouse Hospital, social worker Michele “Missy” Domachowske sees everything from hammered students hollering at the nursing staff to kids literally pissing themselves. While describing to me the standard behaviors in the ER, she used the word “horrific.” “I think people would be beyond shocked at how much we see here,” Missy says. On the rough nights, she’s seen students who have been sexually assaultedwhile passed out or worse. During her 17 year career at Crouse as asocial worker, only one student has ever followed up with Missy about using the substance abuse resources she referred him to. Normally, the only time she sees a student patient she’s helped after they sober up and leave Crouse is if they’re hospitalized for intoxication a second, third, or even fourth time during their time at school.
Blood Alcohol Concentration Quick Sheet .015% BAC per hour // This is the rate alcohol dissipates from your body
.05% BAC // your emotions begin to become intensified.
.08% BAC // This is the nation-wide legal limit for driving under the influence. You begin to think you are functioning better than you are.
.10% BAC // This is the beginning of euphoric feelings associated with alcohol, your memory gets blurry, and your coordination becomes impared
.15% BAC // This is the level where a blackout can occur/start. You probably begin slurring your words and you are at risk of injuring yourself and others
.20% BAC // You lose the ability to process pain and you might begin feeling sick or even vomiting.
.25% BAC // You are both emotionally and physically numb. At this point, you may pass out.
.30% BAC // If you have not passed out yet, you lose control of bodily functions and are seriously impaired.
.35% BAC // This is the level of surgical anesthesia - think how your body reacts when you are put under for a surgery - and you may stop breathing.
.40% BAC // At this point, the level of alcohol in your body is life-threatening. 28 10.17 • JERK
But does blackout culture on campus serve as a handy disguise for true alcoholism? Missy described that students she’s seen experiencing textbook withdrawal symptoms—heightened anxiety, jumpiness, and an amped up heart rate—only to think they have ADHD and need meds for that. That’s how blind students can be to their own addiction. She also said they’ve been seeing “kids with higher and higher blood alcohol levels, which is just alarming.” Missy’s observation is corroborated by the University Senate report, which also noted an increase in hospitalized students with blood alcohol concentrations in the 300s. BAC measures .1 grams of alcohol per deciliter of blood. We’ve all heard the common complaints among students trying to get hammered at parties, “ugh, my tolerance is too high,” and the like, as if it takes more alcohol to get them drunk than other people. Truth is though, just because you don’t feel drunk doesn’t mean you’re not. The more frequently you drink a lot, overtime eventually the less drunk you’ll feel when you hit the same BAC level, even though it’s equally dangerous. Some major factors that influence an individual’s BAC are weight, food recently eaten, use of medication or other drugs, and gender. “Some students are really high [BAC levels]. You get people who’ve been alcoholics for years and their bodies adapt to the alcohol. They can drink 24/7 and still function,” Mason says. “And there are students who come in, their blood alcohol level can be in the 300s and and that just shows they have a drinking problem. It’s not a few drinks here, a few drinks there, that give them that level tolerance.”
For reference, the legal limit for a DWI in New York state is 80, only a fourth or a fifth the of that. “High 200s is dangerous. If that’s a tolerance, it’s a red flag,” Missy says. Another concern about students’ use that’s visible from Crouse Hospital is that, according to Missy, they’ve been seeing more students who end up there not just once during college, but two, three, or four times, which is indicative of a larger pattern or issue with a student’s use. “People do tend to seek out experiences that help them cope with emotions that maybe they don’t have the skills to deal with otherwise,” Kapuscinski says of students with a larger problem. “So it’s very common for people with substance use issues to have other problems as well.” One of Missy’s big worries is that kids don’t know where to go or who to talk to. She believes there’s a need for a space where students can walk in without an appointment to discuss these issues—she emphasized that people need to be validated and supported when they’re experiencing a perceived crisis, whether professionals would label it as urgent or not. She described the missing piece: “A safe place where they can say, ‘Oh I’m really kind of concerned about Jane Smith. She’s out
every single night drinking, and she passed out twice this week.’ Very rarely do you see friends who will step up and say, ‘Yeah this has been going on for a while; this is not the first time Susie Q’s passed out here in the ER. She also has problems at home.’ You know, that type of stuff. I don’t think kids, students have a place or someone they can talk to where it’s not gonna come back on them.” A toxic drinking culture so ingrained in our campus life is not an easy thing to dismantle—heavy drinking on college campuses has been a part of the experience for nearly three generations. But Missy has another idea. She thinks that if students who are struggling could volunteer at the ER from the 10 p.m. to 3 a.m. shift, they would get a much-needed healthy dose of perspective. “I don’t think anybody would want to be incontinent of urine. I don’t see anyone who wants to lay in vomit. Haven’t met anybody yet. If they could see themselves through our set of eyes, through a sober set of eyes, I think that would be a reality.” JM
*We changed the names here to protect our source’s privacy.
Altar Ego SMUT
Crystal Diregorio, a minister in an Upstate New York church —and a former porn star—talks through her journey of leaving glamour and her pain behind.
By Divya Murthy : Photography by Sam Lee As a teenager, Crystal DiGregorio threw herself into typical high school activities: she was on the cheer team at Oswego High School, she made an appearance on her class’s honor roll, she enjoyed going out with her friends and she loved being outdoors. Yet there was something hiding under the surface DiGregorio hadn’t quite dealt with yet — something she wouldn’t deal with until more than a decade later. E v e n t u a l l y , DiGregorio would find her way by becoming a church minister determined to help struggling people discover hope and this would help her to find herself. But this wouldn’t occur until after she battled through her own tumultuous journey, one that included being in the limelight as a porn star. DiGregorio lost her father when she was 13, and soon after that, was
SMUT sexually molested by two individuals. By age 16, she was pregnant and had dropped out of school to care for her son. Two years later, at 18, DiGregorio headed west to Los Angeles from her home in Oswego, NY and turned to exotic dancing to continue to support him. Soon, she found a way to earn even more money — DiGregorio entered the adult film industry. Quickly DiGregorio morphed from herself into her new identity, Nadia Hilton, and rapidly became a well-known porn star who made a good income. While the money was helpful, the hefty cash came at an emotional price. “I felt like I was being raped in my first scene. It was horrible,” DiGregorio, now 34, says. Due to her
father’s death, the successive molestation she endured, and the absence of a positive male figure in her life, a fear of men festered in DiGregorio. Consequently, she would seek out older men in her search of attention — one of the many initial draws to the porn industry. She recalls drinking alcohol and taking pain medication to get herself through the scenes. A career move that was only supposed to last a couple of months ended up being the profession DiGregorio would work in for the next ten years — the fame and money drug her deeper and deeper into the industry. “It was a very glamorous lifestyle,” DiGregorio, says. “But to me, it was like a mask because I had deep damage inside of me from my childhood. Even if you don’t become a big name, you’re temporarily going to make a lot of money. But after that, you’re used up and gone, and new girls are coming in all the time.” A video released by Barcroft Media about DiGregorio’s transition out of porn shows a snap of her in her days as a porn star. She dons fishnet stockings, chunky heels and bold turquoise eyeshadow while being surrounded by flashy Ferraris, a sprawling Malibu house, bright spotlights and drinks. An IMDb profile for Nadia Hilton lists 35 porno titles, all various combinations of innuendos: Double D Divas, Valley Vixens, the list goes on. But now, this is not who DiGregorio is, and Nadia Hilton is no longer who she identifies as. It started with one inadvertent, unplanned trip to church. It was Easter Monday and DiGregorio’s sister had begged her to come along
SMUT for a service. DiGregorio, finally caved into going but refused to wear anything that wasn’t jeans, T-shirt and Ugg-lookalikes. Despite her initial skepticism about attending, that day she felt like the pastor talked directly to her. She fell on her knees in the aisle and cried, for the first time being able to address her pain head on. Sitting in the Lighthouse Church in Mexico, N.Y., sporting a long gray dress with pumps to match, DiGregorio is poised and confident on the couch — she is accompanied by her Pastor, Ronald Russell, assistant Pastor, Jeff Myers and a leatherbound Bible rests on the table. She looks at Russell every time she speaks of healing and coming back from her trauma. Pastor Russell’s church believes in helping everybody rise up from his or her troubles, and DiGregorio was no exception. Everyone at the church knew of DiGregorio’s past but they were all confident she was meant to be there — and Pastor Russell played a big role in convincing them of this. “I would say ‘Crystal, come up here,’ I’d put my arm around her and talk to her in front of the congregation,” he said. “Or I would say ‘Crystal, sit with my wife.’ That sends a strong message, that she’s accepted.” While she is loved and accepted in her church, DiGregorio still faces hurdles such as the hardships that come with having her past smeared all over the Internet and dealing with
rejection from those who judge her. DiGregorio recalls the first time she got fired from a job because of her pornos, it was a law firm in 2014. This was the same year she graduated with honors in a paralegal studies degree from Bryant and Stratton College. “I was shocked, because I had just left another job for this one. And my boss, he calls me into the office and says ‘I didn’t know this was your background,’ and fired me,” Crystal says. “And this was the beginning of my Christian walk too. The Bible says ‘He without sin casts the first stone.’ Nobody has a perfect background. People should be more accepting of a person who wants to change their life.” A 2013 Mic article states employment laws in most states do not outlaw termination in light of an employee’s moral character or employee history — a law that exacerbates the discrimination some former porn stars face in trying to switch careers. DiGregorio’s experience isn’t uncommon — former porn star Houston was turned away from her job because she was “too recognizable,” and another star, Gauge, returned to the porn industry after a brief exit, according to a Salon. com article, because she “was fed up with the way she was treated” in the world outside porn. Gauge’s degrees from criminal justice school and makeup artists school helped her little as employers completely passed over her. Some porn stars have taken incidences of
"The Bible says 'He without sin casts the first stone.' Nobody has a perfect background."
SMUT discrimination all the way to court. In 2012, Stacie Halas, a middle-school biology teacher in Oxnard, lost her job when students found her old videos. Halas told the Ventura County Star that she wanted to take care of her family. A “desperate” and “vulnerable” Halas appealed the decision in court but she lost. The court stated in its 47-page decisions: "Although (Halas') pornography career has concluded, the ongoing availability of her pornographic materials on the Internet will continue to impede her from being an effective teacher and respected colleague.” While there are actors and actresses who enter the porn industry willingly to express themselves and their sexuality, addiction, abuse and self-esteem issues still rank high in the motivation to enter porn. “There’s this interesting dynamic of porn as freedom and porn as particularly problematic for women,” Carol Faulkner, a professor teaching a course in the history of American sexuality at Syracuse University, says. “In some ways, it’s a career that women could shape for themselves and could empower themselves with. However, the porn industry is under a lot of pressures right now. For contributing to the objectification and sexism against women— not allowing women to be considered equal, but really filling the image of women as sex objects.” Currently, DiGregorio is dealing with a new hardship: she is battling skin cancer and is getting ready to undergo chemotherapy. But this tribulation i s invisible under a warm smile on her f a c e as she spoke of the n e w path she has discovered and her determination to stay on it — even if the wildest temptations confront her.
“Money is just a temporary fix for a temporary situation,” she says. “That’s not the path I want to go down. Right now I am lower and weaker, but I stood my ground I have to live with myself with how I view myself and how God views me.” While 70 percent of men and 30 percent of women watch porn yearly, according to a 2017 Psychology Today article, nearly two-thirds of the population views pornography as being morally wrong according to a 2014 Public Religion Research Institute poll. In light of her experience, DiGregorio is one among the twothirds. “There’s nothing healthy from somebody watching porn,” she says. “They get this fake image of someone having sex on film, they start wanting things they can’t get out of their spouse … and now they’ll never be satisfied. There’s nothing really positive that comes out of it.” In the three years since she left porn, DiGregorio has been working as a paralegal, offering her services with crimes, wills, estates and real estate. If she’s not at work, she is at church — she goes up to three times a week with her three sons. The only videos you will find her in are ones she puts up on her own YouTube channel, which show her preaching to her viewers and talking about knowing one’s worth. “We’ve all blown it,” Pastor Russel says. “She walked down one path. I walked a different one. We’ve all fallen short of the glory of God and we all need someone to help us, and according to the Christian church, it’s Jesus Christ. How can I not love you? You are a creation of God.”.JM
All the DEK in DIN Light 10/13.
SU Seniors Eric Cola and Chase Guttman have invested themselves in campus club Skyworks to craft their infatuation with drone photography and videography. By Alexandra Archambault : Photography Provided by Chase Guttman and Eric Cola
Eric Cola received a small, inexpensive drone for Christmas during his sophomore year at Syracuse University. It was nothing he meant to get into, the film major admits, but as he taught himself to fly it around, he became enamored with the power as he began to see the world from above. Cola was stoked to bring his newfound love of droning back to school, but minutes after he let loose on the quad he was met by DPS and a fellow, older student. The former offered him a stern warning about droning around campus but the latter extended a more welcoming message. A message inviting him to a meeting for Skyworks, an on-campus club made up of 36 10.17
engineering students interested in building and racing drones and photography/film students captivated by drone imagery. Cola was hooked after attending the first meeting. It was here that he met Chase Guttman ’18 who has been working with drones since prior to attending Syracuse. Guttman is seen as somewhat of a connoisseur when it comes to drone photography. He often travels to give lectures and is writing a book regarding the subject. He even says he chose Syracuse’s Newhouse School because of how they were applying drones to journalism and he really wanted to explore this realm. While the basics of drones may seem
obvious—plug your phone into the drone by pollinating plants, they’re being used to help controller and it will tell you how high the drone endangered wildlife… honestly they’re being is, how much battery is left, and allow you to see used in such fascinating ways and I feel like it’s what the drone sees—Guttman explains there just the beginning of that.” is nothing quite like actually operating a drone Cola, who owns two drones, describes and experiencing it for yourself. Comparing it to his dream job as being a drone videographer playing a favorite video game, his face lights up on film sets, fusing his major with his hobby. as he describes using the controller to see the Guttman, who owns four, says he would like to world as though you have never seen it before. “ride the wave of drones as long as it lasts” in He throws around words such as "powerful," his journalistic storytelling. Both are adamant "exhilarating" and "incredible" over and over. that drone use should be introduced to a wider “Not only are drones really awesome for audience on campus, and Skyworks is looking to photography, these are something that are really find a way to do just that. It is their hope more changing the world right now,” Guttman says. students will soon have access to learn to both “They are being used to possibly replace bees use a drone to capture their footage.JM JERK
We’ve watched fashion giants like Zara and American Apparel release supposedly unisex collections, but it’s pretty obvious that anyone can rifle through the men's section if they want some plain T-shirts. In this issue we eschew androgynous fashion norms and sync the men’s and women’s racks with bold colors, ruffled sleeves, and cropped cuts. Ditch the dull hoodie and get in loser—we’re going shopping. Stylists: Hairol Ma, Nick Della Sala, Hayley Greason Photographer: Cassie Zhang, Sam Lee Makeup Artists: Sidney Mullanix Models: Grace Crummet, Craig Bobie, Maddie Fetzko Designer: Ciara Bethel For a behind–the–scenes look, check out our video at jerkmagazine.net. 38 10.17
Right: Model: Craig Bobie Pants: Asos $40 Shirt: Jaded London $54 Shoes: Model’s Own Model: Maddie Fetzko Shirt: Jaded London $24 Pants: Bones $25 Glasses: Etsy $25
Model: Grace Crummet Shirt: Star Wars $38 Hat: ASOS $26 Model: Maddie Fetzko Jersey: Thrifted $5 Earrings: UO $7.50
GAWK FEATURE Left: Model: Craig Bobie Shirt: Asos $35 Pants: UO $70 Model: Maddie Fetzko Beret: UO $30 Shirt: Thrift $5 Necklace: UO $10 Earrings: Model’s Own Pants: Zara $10
GAWK FEATURE Right: Model: Craig Bobie Mesh Shirt: Amazon $20 Muscle Tee: silence + noise $7 Bellbottoms: Etsy $90 Craig’s necklace: Amazon $20 Model: Grace Crummet Sweatshirt: Jaded London $95 Jeans: Zara $50
Model: Craig Bobie Dress: Asos $72 Belt: Topman $20
Glasses: Amazon $10
GAWK GAWK FEATURE FEATURE
GAWK GAWK FEATURE FEATURE
Who gives a shit if a tattoo has meaning or not? Stylish tats are on trend in the fashion world—just ask supermodel Cara Delevingne. Here are some artists that are dominating the scene. Illustration by Tori Thomas and Jacob Marcus
@georgiagreynyc Grey’s tattoos areworks of art, and don’t be fooled by her last name— she’s mastered the bold and bright brushstroke styledescribed by most as “watercolor.”For her, “every day is a new painting waiting to happen on someone’s skin.”She works at Bang Bang Tattoo, a well-known parlor in the heart of Manhattan run by artist Keith “Bang Bang” McCurdy. Herspecialization in watercolorstands out against the monochrome blacks and greys of the tattoo world.
46 10.17 • JERK
STRIPPED @_dr_woo Praised forintricacy and precise thin lines in his work, Woo started out as an apprentice to Mark Mahoney at Shamrock Social Club on Sunset Strip. This spring, he opened his secret parlor in a famous Hollywood hoteland has a rep of tatting the likes ofZoe Kravitz and Drake.His signature style has been donned “Woo arrows”:an arrangement of thin circles, lines,andarrows that drives insta followers and tattoo appreciators crazy
@scampbell333 As Marc Jacob’s go-to tattoo artist, Campbell is arguably the most influential tat masterin the fashion industry. Campbell has been establishedfor a while, but his style continues to stay trendy and desired by fashion icons to this day. Some of his staple designs include classic tattoo emblems like roses and skulls with modernadditions of geometricshapes and lines.
GIRLS GIRLS GIRLS Trace through central New York's badass feminist past, present and future. By Jerk Staff : Photography/Illustration by Samantha Adams The fight for equal rights has always been a fact of life for women in this country. Central New York was the birthplace of the women’s rights movement in America, and ever since the Seneca Falls Convention in 1848, Central New York has remained at the forefront of feminism ever since. Donald Trump and his accomplices personify the struggle against discrimination today, but women have overcome every historical threat so far. We found a surprising amount of activity from the Syracuse region — a line of women that form a largely forgotten but critically important facet of the larger feminist movement. Architects of the Underground Railroad, riot grrrl musicians, a world-renowned political artist, and a trailblazing journalist, among others, have all called Central New York home. Some went to Syracuse University; others never received a formal education. Some were born and raised here; others just passed through. They’re all united by a dedication to one of the most important movements in history. Here’s to the women who’ve gotten us to where we are today, and America is better because of them.
Third Wave Early 1990s - Present The riot grrrl movement emerged in Olympia, W.A. and Washington, D.C. in the 1990s as a direct response to the male dominated punk scene. Focused on female representation, rape, struggles of conformity, gender and sexuality, the movement highlighted third wave feminist core values. Punk began as a way for the marginalized to take the taboo and negative corners of society and expose them to the public in a shocking way. Riot grrrl bands gave women the chance to be at the forefront of the shock and awe. “It was a way of redirecting punk's political edge toward issues affecting women and girls,” says Theodore Cateforis, doctor of Music History and Cultures at Syracuse University. “As punk bands had become increasingly technically proficient, it was also a way of reclaiming the
music's DIY ragged and raw amateurish quality,” said Cateforis. And with that DIY feel came zines, chapters, and organized motions towards creating positive feminist change, a holistic movement to fuck the patriarchy. Though the movement splintered in the later 1990s, one of our favorite bands to the jerk to, Perfect Pussy, is keeping the spirit of the riot grrrl alive. Founded in 2012 in Syracuse, the band quickly stumbled into the limelight, landing their first full-length album on NPR, Pitchfork and NME’s best album lists in 2014. Deemed “unprintable” by the New York Times and “music to kick down walls to” by Paste Magazine, their sticky, elastic guitars riff alongside lyrics that challenge gender and sex, all while waxing poetic about past lovers.
First Wave 1822-1913
First Wave 1826-1898
Female leaders like Harriet Tubman rose above the fray
Names like Elizabeth Cady Stanton and Susan B. Anthony
during the Civil Rights movement in the 1800s to fight
will go down forever as the textbook crusaders of first
against slavery and discrimination. Tubman, born into
wave feminism, but many of the movement’s leaders were
slavery, successfully escaped from Maryland to Pennsyl-
written out of history. One of them lived here in Onondaga
vania, a free state, in 1849. Tubman, used the Under-
County her whole life. Matilda Joslyn Gage lived in Fay-
ground Railroad to help free her remaining family mem-
etteville from 1854 to 1898, and you can drive just 15 min-
bers and others from slavery. She became the first woman
utes to see her home for yourself. Inside, visitors can ex-
to lead an armed expedition in the Civil War and was able
plore rooms by historical theme, such as a women’s rights
to free more than 700 slaves in South Carolina. Near the
room, Underground Railroad room, and a native American
end of the war, Tubman bought a home in Auburn, N.Y.
from New York Senator William Seaward under the propo-
One of Gage’s greatest fans teaches at SU. Sally Roesch
sition that she would shelter freed slaves passing through
Wagner, an adjunct professor in the Honors Program,
founded the Matilda Joslyn Gage Foundation in 1999. Wag-
Tubman also worked with a small group of women to
ner loves Gage so much that she impersonates her, and
fight for women’s suffrage. In 1868, the first major politi-
has been arrested twice for civil disobedience while in
cal group that advocated for women’s suffrage was estab-
character. A distinguishing feature of Gage’s personality
lished. The following year Susan B. Anthony created the
was her progressive stance on abortion issues. A little-
National Women Suffrage Association. Tubman toured to
known fact about her is that she was the mother-in-law of
give speeches about her experiences as a female slave
Frank L. Baum, the author of The Wizard of Oz. The Wizard
and her work to free hundreds of slaves during the war.
of Oz, another CNY historical gem.
Tubman’s house still stands in Auburn today.
Second Wave 1945 - Present
Third Wave 2015 - Present
Even if you’ve never heard of Barbara Kruger, you’ve seen
Syracuse’s one and only grassroots music and arts festi-
her work. The cherry red Supreme logo is a blatant rip-off
val dedicated to celebrating women started when the co-
her of distinctive style. Now 72, Krueger was a hugely
organizer Megan Tamilio decided the city needed a “turbo
influential feminist artist creating pieces that tacked male
blast of feminism.” Woman power, solidarity, fun and
gaze, capitalism, and gender roles. Kruger attended Syra-
revolution are the messages around which LadyFest is
cuse University, and although she dropped out after one
organized. Held at Spark Contemporary Art Space since
year, her influence still touches New York. Art has always
last year, the festival features several different bands in-
been a powerful tool of protest, and Kruger’s work com-
cluding Escuela from Ithaca, Green Dreams from Roch-
bines feminism and art into an undeniable message about
ester, the Syracuse-based Moebetta Thagoddess, Beau
how society and capitalism affect women. Since the early
Mahadev from Ithaca, and Dirtybandaid from Bingham-
80s, Kruger has produced hundreds of pieces. The most
ton. Tamilio says the best thing about LadyFest is that
influential ones use the power of simplistic phrasing. “We
several people said how inspiring they found the whole
don’t need another hero,” “Your body is a battleground,”
event to be. People have also asked if guys could go, and
“Your gaze hits the side of my face,” and “I shop, therefore
yes, of course they can. (Heads up, guys: you should be
I am” are all maxims Kruger emblazoned over images of
feminists, too). Ladyfest continues the grand history of
women cribbed from magazines and other media. Her
feminism in the area, adding its own mark on Syracuse
most devastating piece places the phrase “Not stupid
through art and music. Though it's only been happening
enough” over a close-up of Marilyn Monroe’s smiling face.
for two years, the festival is poised to become a tradition
Through her work, viewers are forced to examine the way
society perceives women. It's a visual fuck-you to conformity and capitalist, patriarchal ideals.
CAFFEINE FIX Whether you take it with soymilk or full of cream and sugar, we know just how much you need your coffee to get through your 8 a.m. capstone class. Here at Jerk, we have taken it upon ourselves to break down exactly what is in your Starbucks cup. From where it came from to how it is made, take a minute to think about your chosen method of getting caffeinated. And if you're wondering, we take ours black. By Jerk Staff : Illustration by Yingying Yue and Chelsea Portner
NOISE 1800 + This began in the 1800s and lasted until the 1970s. This was the era of mass-producing coffee. Instant coffee, vacuum packaging, the classic Maxwell House blend and the first automatic drip coffee maker came into peopleâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s lives during this time. This era was criticized for sacrificing taste and quality over mass production and convenience.
FIRST COFFEEE WAVE
1970 +This wave started in 1970 as a reaction to shitty coffee and lasted until the 2000s. The opening of the first Starbucks in Seattle is seen as the symbol of the beginning of this wave. Specialty beans became accessible, and words like latte, cappuccino and espresso became commonplace.
SECOND COFFEE WAVE
+A term first used in 2002, third wave coffee describes an era of boutique coffee shops, sustainable businesses and direct trade. Bougie brewing methods like cold brew, Chemex and Aeroprevss have also become available at your local hipster coffee joint during this period as well.
THIRD COFFEE WAVE
BREW IT YOURSELF
TASTE TEST What’s the origin of the word mocha? o Name of Island of South America o Name of Yemeni Port City o Arabic word for chocolate Who brought coffee to Java? o Marco Polo o Dutch East India Company o Muslim traders
1. Make espresso 2. Heat up milk until it’s very hot but not boiling 3. Whip milk into a thick foam with a whisk 4. Swirl and tap until foam is rich and creamy
Where did coffee originate? o Ethiopia o Brazil o Indonesia
AMERICANO 1. Make espresso 2. Pour espresso into cup 3. Fill the rest of the cup with hot water
Who drinks the most coffee? o Italy o Peru o Finland
Answers: Yemni Port City Dutch East India Company Robusta Beans Ethiopia Finland
1. Heat milk in a saucepan 2. Whisk briskly to create foam 3. Brew espresso and pour into 4 cups 4. Pour in milk 5. Add as much foam as you like on top
What kind of bean has the most caffeine content? o Arabica Beans o Robusta Beans o Mocha Java
CAFE KUBAL Café Kubal has several locations around Syracuse, but the SU Café located right at Marshall Square Mall is definitely a crowd favorite amongst SU students. It not only shares a space with 3fifteen, well known thrift store affiliated with Rescue Mission, but also donates 8% of its profits directly to it. Kubal has a wide selection of coffee beans from all around the world, a to-die-for eggs benedict breakfast toast and warm apple cider during winter months. The design of the location is also just enough to make you want to sit and do work (or just watch Netflix, we don’t judge.
FREEDOM OF ESPRESSO Conveniently located in Armory Square, Freedom of Espresso provides a nice alternative to Starbucks. All their beans are locally roasted, offering you a true taste of CNY. It is also a great place to work, with a calm, laid back atmosphere and a friendly staff that will be happy to have you there. JERK
Appropriately located in the artsy Westcott neighborhood of Syracuse, this local gem attracts a devoted crowd from both the university and the city. Open since 2007, Recess Coffee uses fairly traded beans direct from farms with missions of sustainability and ethical practices. Just order a nice cup of lavender latte (when it’s in season) and a terminator panini and enjoy a nice afternoon. Just a side note, the people you run into might be way artsier than you, so visit at your own risk.
LGBTQ+ RIGHTS It may be 2017, but the fight for LGBT rights is far from over.
By Taylor Connors : Illustration by Emily Bruder
Trans Rights are Human Rights— this “I believe that marriage is the union social media movement erupted over between a man and a woman” was his summer after President Trump announced answer. Eventually, President Obama his ban on transgender people in the “evolved” to help overcome the obstacle military. Although shocking after promising of the Defense of Marriage Act to promote LGBTQ+ protection on his campagin equality. Since Obama changed his trail, Trump's abandonment of values is stance, maybe Trump could. Probably not. something the nation is learning to expect. Nevertheless, the LGBTQ+ community Still, the idea that we have a President has relentlessly conquered every battle so unfriendly to this community is they have faced. In the 1960s, police alarming. Not only did he fail to federally would raid LGBTQ+ friendly places and recognize Pride Month, but now he is arrest people based on sexual orientation banning people from serving our country or gender identity. After years of this, and, subsequently, from working. I worked the Stonewall Riots erupted, which for the Human Rights Campaign with an ignited the gay liberation movement. almost solely queer office, and the day- Remembrance of this event soon turned to-day updates on Trump’s decisions into a yearly celebration we call Pride. added to the LGBTQ+ body’s distress. Pride represents the immense progress This isn’t the first time a President felt that has been made in the rights and distaste towards this community. Shit, acceptance of LGBTQ+ people. It also it’s the forty-fifth. From Washington to reminds us there is so much more to Obama, the government has repeatedly be done. Gay people can still legally be brought opposition against LGBTQ people. fired for their sexual orientation in 28 Now you might be thinking: "What? states. Just over a year ago, the deadliest President Obama was the most LGBTQ+ mass shooting in the U.S. took place in a progressive President in history!" And gay nightclub—an obvious hate crime. you would be right. Under our forty-fourth And now, trans people’s right to serve wonder, the Matthew Shepard Act was our nation is being threatened—just another passed, Marriage Equality became a reality, obstacle. The community has made it this and much more. However, I distinctly far, changing discriminatory legislation, remember when Obama was running beating hateful opposition, and gaining for office and was confronted with a worldwide support. If they could overcome question to his stance on marriage equality. all that, a big cheeto is not to stop them. JM
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PODCASTS MIGOS By Rebecca Ahmed : Illustration by Laura Norton
THE DEAL: Migos, a trio of famed MCs named Quavo, Offset, and Takeoff graved the Great New York State Fair on September 3rd. Ridding the fairgrounds of flannel-sporting couples and welcoming tank-top brazen college students, the level of excitement was through the roof. But with this hype sentiment, some issues have taken the backseat. Did you consider that going to this free show might have come at a steep cost: the indirect support for the anti-LGBTQ movement? Before I turn you away, let me explain. THE ISSUE: In Jonah Weiner's recent interview with the trio, "Migos' Wild World" for Rolling Stone, they made some bold statements. Weiner writes: "I'm surprised by Migos' reaction when I mention iLoveMakonnen, the local MC who just came out as gay on Twitter. 'Damn, Makonnen!' Quavo bellows after an awkward interlude. I mention support I saw online for Makonnen's decision. 'They supported him?' Quavo asks, raising an eyebrow. 'That's because the world is fucked up,' says Offset. 'This world is not right,' Takeoff says. 'We ain't saying it's nothing wrong with the gays,' says Quavo. But he suggests that Makonnen's sexuality undermines his credibility," Weiner reported. THE (LARGER) ISSUE: What they’re suggesting is fucked up. Migos acknowledges that LGBTQ+ people are
around, but suggests that if their sexuality doesn’t link up with their outside engagements, they're in the wrong. Essentially, Migos stated that stereotypes need to be abided by like law in the music industry. You want to rap and trap and hit the bando? Sorry, heterosexual males only. Still, they make really good music. More people have heard of “Bad & Boujee” than of their homophobic interview, and frankly, people will brush off their comments to go to their concerts. How, in 2017, when it seems like our world is going to shit could increasingly relevant popular culture icons throw around crap like this? THE DEFENSE: Did you think we were going to try and defend Migos like we normally do here? Behavior like theirs so often goes unquestioned, even in 2017. Migos can't be allowed to spread bigotry, and no one can continue to sing along without tacitly agreeing with their homophobia. I’ll leave it at that. Sure, they apologized, but they barely take any blame. Where do we draw the line? Buying their songs and tickets to their concerts are forms of monetary support and, in turn, validate that if you’re cool enough you can say whatever the hell you want even if it hurts others. JM
MORNING WARS Members: Marc Ramos (Vocals, Piano), Trevor Chesler (Bass, Piano), Noah Mintz (Guitar), Ben Friedman (Guitar) Active since: 2016 | Sounds like: Neon Trees, Young the Giant | What they Jerk to: The Killers, Hippo Campus By Lydia Herne : Photography by Leigh Ann Rodgers Jerk Magazine: What inspires your music? MR: There was a teacher that I had in a script writing class I took. He always said, “You should always write from what you know.” You don’t wanna make something up without having done the research. So personal experience definitely plays a big role. JM: What does the future look like for the band? MR: This year we’re going to just focus on making as much music as possible. For the future it depends, I’d like to keep it going. TC: We’ve had people in the music business tell us they fuck with our sound and they want to hear more. So I think it kind of depends on when we drop everything, how it hits. If it hits, then hell yeah! JM: What’s the origin of your band name? TC: So I’m in history class freshman year. It’s one of those huge lecture hall classes. Everyone’s on their computers, no one
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gives a shit. Then the professor starts talking about these things called Mourning Wars that Native Americans used to pull on settlers. I put it in my list of band names that I have in my phone, and that was just the coolest one. We changed it to “Morning” for a happier feel. JM:Have you played any gigs? Are you looking to play any in the future? MR: We played our first gig last semester, that’s how Ben got in the band. We have our EP in production so we kind of want to focus all our time on that, to make it the best it can be. Not to say we won’t play shows in between, but after we get this EP out there we’re gonna be playing shows every weekend. JM: Additionally— BF: Yeah I’ll say it; we need a drummer. Right now we have a computer playing for us, and he’s great but he never shows up live. JM
AND WE’RE LIVE Having made a largely overlooked debut with the 1995 ESPN SportsZone radiobroadcast stream of a Mariners vs. Yankees game, livestreaming gained momentum and recognition in 2016 with the launch of Facebook Live and VR streaming technologies. With its appeal curated from a mix of FOMO, instant gratification and revenue potential it, here are some of livestreaming’s noteworthy platforms.
LIVESTREAM: Super Deluxe “Is it OK to punch a Nazi?”— this duhinducing rhetorical question, accompanied with an arcade-style image of Adolf Hitler streamed live is how Super Deluxe achieved livestream fame in February. While normally a livestream gains most views when it isno longer live, Super Deluxe manages to get a striking 680,000 live
LIVESTREAM: Sara Dietchy The next Casey Neistat of YouTube, Sara Dietchy defines herself as a photographer, filmmaker, and all around interneter. With her humorous tone and aesthetically pleasing videos, Dietschy gained a devoted following. Dietschy goes live every few weeks to give insider tips on cameras, filming and
views per stream. A couple months ago their broadcasts lasted a half an hour on average—now they have edgy, hip content that lasts for two and a half hours. They streamed gems like “World’s Greatest Freestyle Rapper Alive”and “Vincente Fox for President: Official Campaign Ad,” that you can probably best enjoy post blunt hit.
LIVESTREAM: Refinery29 For Refinery29, a Facebook livestream is serious business—which is why they have a 10 person team devoted exclusively to this task. From conversations about change with activists to how to unleash your girlboss, Refinery29's livestream is just the right dose of activism to balance your newsfeed.
Jell-O Museum The Jell-O Museum in LeRoy, N.Y. commemorates the place where the Jell-O brand was founded. By Tiffany Moran : Photography by Kasey Lanese The U.S. has brought a lot of questionable Whether you’re simply curious about fads and inventions into the limelight — the offbeat nature of the gallery or intrigued artisanal anything, unpaid internships, by the history and science, those who work planking. But hidden in historic LeRoy, N.Y., at the Jell-O museum try hard to satisfy. the city that brought the stringless-string Belluscio and her coworkers at the museum bean into existence, is a slice of good ol' have seen visitors from all over the world cherry-flavored Americana. It is here that come for various reasons, averaging about the Jell-O brand was born, and it is here that 10,000 visitors a year. the Jell-O Museum resides. “We get all 50 states represented,” she “Most places have a reason to be on says. “But it’s more than just Americana the map,” director, Lynne Belluscio says. that stops here. We’re always amused when “There is something, a reason, why they we get folks from other countries because existed or are famous, and in the case of Jell-O isn’t really known outside North us, Jell-O moved out of town in 1964. It’s America.”The gallery also caters to these now made in Dover, Delaware but is there a foreign visitors with an exhibit on Canadian museum there commemorating Jell-O? No! Jell-O and an exhibit of gelatin from other It’s here.” countries. Gelatin from Pakistan and Japan You reach the museum by following the are shown off along with hockey puck Jell-O cleverly named "Jell-O brick road." Housed molds from Canada. The museum gets their in an old-school building, it’s a small demographic info from a ‘Favorite Jell-O museum, but there’s no shortage of charm Flavor Poll’—it has been neck and neck or history. Stretching over an entire wall are between raspberry and cherry for a while 100 Jell-O molds, met by 400 spoons on the now. ceiling. Turn around to another wall and Despite the assumption that Jell-O is a you’ll find the original 1920s oil paintings 'kid’s food,' the Jell-O museum is for all ages used to advertise for Jell-O, adding splashes with an entrance fee of $5. “We just really of soft color to the already vibrant exhibit. want people to come and have a happy Upon further inspection, an old “Jell-O- time,” Belluscio says. “You know you can’t Meter," a tool to test the jigglyness of Jell-O really say Jell-O without smiling and maybe in the factory, can be found on display. in these days, that’s what we all need. JM
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GET REAL Assistant professor Jennifer Grygiel talks through fake news, its creation, and why we need to know about it. By Hayley Greason : Photography by Molly Coletta We all love to joke about the president’s borderline ridiculous use of the term 'fake news,' but do we really know what this buzzword means? Jerk picked Grygiel's brain to get the low-down on fake news. Jerk Magazine: For those who are a little behind on the times, could you just give a quick definition of fake news and how it was born? Jennifer Grygiel: It was really kind of post U.S. election when fake news started to enter the public discussion and people started talking about it. I think a lot of people were in shock, by the election of President Trump. I think he also had a really big role in branding it as fake news. Around January or February, there was the famous CNN tweet, when he called CNN fake news. At one point I ran analytics on the term and you can see the spike, it was that day that fake news was born. JM: How does the term fake news live on social media platforms? JG: A lot of hoax-type stuff trends on Facebook and other social networks that are meant to
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look similar to the news and has pieces of truth in it, and then has that underbelly that’s just like, nope, that’s definitely not real. It’s meant essentially for social media engagement. It’s problematic, in a huge sense. I think that Zuckerberg and Facebook have had a wakeup call. I would also put forward that it’s not the only thing we need to worry about. A lot of people are like 'fake news, fake news, fake news' you know and even some people at Buzzfeed have made it their full-time job finding fake news stories but it’s a much larger issue when it comes to the governance and regulations of social media platforms. JM: Where do these fake news stories come from? JG:They come from all over the world. It’s mostly people just trying to make a quick dollar. But then we also did see Russian interference. Literally they paid for ads to influence the election. I’m not making this stuff up. So it’s not all like ‘Hey, lets make a couple pennies on the dollar for a couple clicks,’ sometimes it’s being used as propaganda for control purposes. JM
Taylor Swift CAUSE OF DEATH: The Public
By Naomi Duttweiler : Illustration by Tori Thomas
After a starlit eleven-year career of chart-topping hits and high profile relationships, the Old Taylor Swift died a long and painful death at the hands of the Public’s criticism and distrust. Old Taylor’s career was graciously taken over by her alter ego, “the New Taylor Swift,” who has a penchant for short skirts, high heels, and lounging in diamond-filled bathtubs. The Old Taylor leaves behind a collection of kitschy taxidermy, lumpy wool cardigans, and her beloved acoustic guitar. Her cat Meredith was rescued by the ASPCA and is looking for a new home after New Taylor forced the feline to listen to her songs on repeat. A bright-eyed Taylor Alison Swift entered the world on a snowy mid-December day in Pennsylvania. Inspired by country legends before her, Swift left her white suburban paradise at the ripe age of fourteen to pursue a career in Nashville. Her first, self-titled album was released in 2006 and reached number five on the Billboard 200 chart. Old Taylor followed up her premiere album with four more, selling over thirty-three million albums worldwide and betraying her country roots for the more lucrative pop genre. Old Taylor would continue to make a name for herself with chart-topping breakup songs and culturally insensitive attempts at twerking. Despite her entirely innocent but offensive missteps, the Public loved her for her naiveté and catchy hits. Old Swift maintained a squeaky
clean reputation throughout her eight romantic relationships in the spotlight, although the last tryst with Tom Hiddleston was largely seen as a publicity stunt. Her image in the eyes of the Public began eroding when reality TV mogul Kim Kardashian West exposed Old Swift’s fake feminism with indisputable receipts. The Public would continue to shake it off to Old Swift’s popular tunes while criticizing the singer for questionable choices like parading around her whitewashed squad of glamazons and her silence during the presidential election. Celebrity analysts and psychologists would later propose that this harsh judgment wore on Old Swift’s cheerful optimism. The Media grew concerned when Old Swift failed to attend awards shows, deleted her social media accounts, and evaded the Paparazzi. On Aug 24, 2017, the New Taylor Swift came forward with a confession—Old Taylor Swift was found dead surrounded by her 21 Billboard awards, ten Grammys, and seven VMAs in the trophy room of her $17 million Rhode Island mansion. Coroners reportedly had to pry her 2009 VMA award for “You Belong With Me” from her cold, lifeless fingers. Experts later hypothesized that it was the Public that had dealt the deathblow, finishing her off when her last remaining fans admitted she had lost it. JM
vanity Fur Humans are overrated anyway. Photos by Nick Della Sala
“This is Gloria. She is a 5 month “Peter Quill is a 5-month-old “This is Katana, my 3-year-old old skinny pig—also known as a hedgehog. I brought him out to albino ball python. He's a super hairless guinea pig. Her the quad the first week here friendly snake, all my hobbies include cuddling and and a group of people stopped roommates love him. eating kiwi. Everyone is always to meet him. He immediately Sometimes when it's sunny out scared of her at first, but then went for this one random girl, we take him on the roof with us. they realize how warm and climbed up her shirt and just One time he escaped from his loving she is. Sometimes she stayed there. He loves the tank and was missing in my stands up on her hind legs and ladies. Also, I left him for a few house for a few weeks. I'd given rubs her whiskers with her little days a few weeks ago and he up hope of finding him and then hands and pretends to be a dog. was sad that I left, so when I got one day I was packing up to Also, we just got her and she’s back all he wanted to do was leave for vacation, and I found already peed on me twice. Still sleep on my stomach. At one him hiding under my suitcase love her though.” point, he reached out his arms as I was walking out the door. I and actually gave me a hug, knew he would never leave which I didnt know they could me!” do.”
—Abby Tattle, Sophomore
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—Dan Prager, Junior
—Camille Avarella, Senior
FORM & FUNCTION How To Dress Like a Horse Girl
Engraved Spirit Necklace: My horse, Spirit, came into my life on my 16th birthday. Since then, my life has never been the same. I dread the day my beloved Spirit dies. I will keep this necklace on FOREVER, he is my whole heart and world. Braid and Scrunchie: I’m pretty sure there are lice living in this scrunchie, but I’ve been wearing it since my first win with Spirit... how could I throw it out?
Horse t-shirt: This is my absolute fave shirt. The beautiful horsey galloping across it reminds me of Spirit. God I love her so much.
Helmet: I used to trot in P.E. class instead of run, and it just stuck. Turns out it isn’t the best way to get around, I trip and fall sometimes. Gotta protect that noggin!
Bootcut jeans: Since I know you’re wondering, they’re the Women’s WRANGLER® Ultimate Riding Jean. A MUST for serious riders like myself. An important plus is the deep pockets, they’re ideal for holding Spirit’s hand-cut star-shaped carrot treats.
Model: Michelle Jordan Photographer: Kasey Lanese
TAKE A BREAK FROM BEING A
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gofundme: studentswithpr gofundme: dr2ks2-las-vegas-victims-fund
THE WORLD IS A VERY SCARY PLACE RIGHT NOW. CONSIDER DONATING TO AID IN HURRICANE RELIEF AND THE VICTIMS OF THE ATTACK IN LAS VEGAS.