CharlottesvilleFamily's BLOOM Holiday 2020

Bloom Family’s

Y HOLGIITDAAL DI N EDITIO

at Home!

Pet Guide Raising Resilient Kids TREE FARMS & SHOPPING LOCAL

FAMILY FAVORITES AWARDS ISSUE HOLIDAY 2020

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On CharlottesvilleFamily.com—the ultimate resource for making parenting easier and growing up fun—you will find a calendar of local events, daytrip ideas, contest and giveaways, feature stories on learning and health, recipes, gardening and home décor ideas, local resource guides, crafts and projects for kids, and much more!

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Pediatric Associates of Charlottesville, PLC 2020

Comprehensive care from infancy to young adulthood Office Hours By Appointment Evening & Weekends until 9pm Urgent Care Available One of Our Physicians On Call After Hours Onsite Lactation Consultant

Downtown Office & | 296-9161 Adolescent Center | 971-9611 1011 E. Jefferson St West Office 2411 Ivy Rd | 296-8300 North Office 29N at Hollymead (1522 Insurance Lane, A) | 974-9600 Zion Crossroads Office 71 Jefferson Court | 540-406-4100

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volume 21 issue 6 PUBLISHERS

Just Between Us…

holiday 2020

Robin Johnson Bethke Jennifer Bryerton

CREATIVE DIRECTOR Robin Johnson Bethke EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Jennifer Bryerton TECHNICAL DIRECTOR Peter D. Bethke SENIOR EDITOR Sarah Pastorek Short ASSOCIATE EDITOR Ellen Sewell ONLINE EDITOR Jennifer Carroll

Dear Friends,

GRAPHIC DESIGNER

In this most unusual of years, I’ve learned it is more important than ever to look for the silver linings, to give everyone a little extra grace and to be thankful for our blessings. We just celebrated a birthday at our

Barbara A. Tompkins

MARKETING CONSULTANT Jenny Stoltz

FAMILY HEALTH EDITOR Katharine Paljug CONTRIBUTING WRITERS & PHOTOGRAPHERS

house. As he eagerly opened his glow-in-the-dark slime and struck a silly

Lexi Clatterbuck, Rick Epstein,

pose with his rainbow-striped confetti cake his sister baked, it struck

Melissa Face, Amanda Mews,

Katharine Paljug, Robert Radifera,

Dana Reinhardt, Liza Stoner, Bob Taibbi

me that just around the corner lurks laissez faire teenage “coolness.” I’m cherishing all these simple times together more this year. What’s really

BOOKKEEPER Theresa Klopp

important somehow seems to be much clearer and less obscured by

OFFICE ADMINISTRATOR

busyness.

I’m not sure what next year will bring, whether it’s having the kids back on a more traditional school schedule or getting to have birthday

Christine DeLellis-Wheatley

INTERNS Lexi Clatterbuck, Liza Stoner, Francis Swinson

parties with a gang of friends. But, I do hope we hang on to this clarity.

I’ve really enjoyed more lazy evenings with the kids, long phone calls with faraway family and friends, and cooking delicious foods. While 2020 has had an extraordinary amount of challenge and sadness, I’m truly grateful for the extra time with family and the reminder to cherish everyone and all the special moments.

Wishing you all a beautiful holiday season!

CharlottesvilleFamily™ Bloom Magazine and CharlottesvilleFamily. com™ are published jointly by Ivy Life & Style Media.

CharlottesvilleFamily.com™ is published weekly online at www.

CharlottesvilleFamily.com, the weekly Newsletter is distributed via email, and the Magazine is published in print format 6 times per year along with a CharlottesvilleFamily.com™ Directory. The views and opinions expressed by the writers and advertisers do not necessarily represent those of CharlottesvilleFamily magazine, its officers, staff or contributors. The information presented here is for informational purposes only and although every effort has been made to present accurate information, we do not in any way accept responsibility for the accuracy of or consequences from the use of this information or for the businesses and organizations presented herein. We urge all parents to confirm any information given herein and consult with your doctor or an appropriate professional concerning any information of question. All images not credited are property of and provided by iStock by Gettyimages. No portion of this publication may be reproduced in part or in whole without the express written consent of the publisher. Copyright ©2020. All rights reserved.

We welcome reader comments, submissions and the support of advertisers!

Please direct all correspondence to Ivy Life & Style Media 4282 Ivy Road, Charlottesville, Virginia 22903 voice 434.984.4713 www.CharlottesvilleFamily.com editor@IvyLifeandStyleMedia.com We reserve the right to refuse or edit any materials submitted to us that we deem inappropriate for our audience. Include a SASE with any submission to be returned. We do not accept responsibility for unsolicited materials.

2004 Community Award Winner

6

Holiday 2020

Contents TABLE OF

52

OUR TOWN

LIVING WELL

New Mom 24 Apps for A New Mom

News 8

The Buzz Around Town 10

Are you changing your usual holiday gathering/travel plans due to COVID?

2020 CharlottesvilleFamily Favorite Winners 38

Healthy Family 26 Staying Healthy

Editor’s Pick

Daytrip Holiday Fun 18

Places to Enjoy Christmas Lights

This Season

This Holiday issue is packed with parenting advice and resources, tips on pretend play and raising resilient kids, local tree farms and gift ideas, holiday outing ideas and recipes, and much more.

Trim That Tree 22

Local Farms Offering Cookies with

Santa & More

Pet Contest Winner 54

Teen Jobs & Autism 58

How to Provide Job Support for Your

Autistic Teen

Pretend Play 62

Fostering Your Child’s Creative Spirit

Raising Resilient Kids 68

9 Tips for Helping Your Kids in These

Challenging Times

Submissions from Bumble’s 2020 Pet Contest

RESOURCES

Buy Local Shopping Guide 34

HOME & GARDEN

Home & Garden 28 Pantry Organization Tips

Local Pet Guide 52

Caring for Your Precious Pets

Tasty Traditions 32 Holiday Recipes from Our Families

UNTIL NEXT TIME

to Yours

Local Handmade & Vintage 35 Holiday Gift-Giving Ideas

35

Your Winning Picks for Family-Friendly Fun & Services

Ready for A Pet? 50

Choosing the Best One for Your Family

Things To Do 16

Holiday Events for Families

INSPIRATION

Support Our Community

Under the Money Tree 74

A Dad’s Humorous Tales

So Love This!

“We are excited to see the adorable pet contest submissions (pg 54), visit a local tree farm (pg 22) and support local shops (pg 35) this year.”

— Jenny, marketing consultant

58 CharlottesvilleFamily.com

7

{our town community}

News

local buzz

CharlottesvilleFamily proudly sponsors: GardenFest of Lights

Toy Lift 2020

Lewis Ginter Botanical Garden November 23–January 10, 2021

November 28–December 4

Grand Illumination Airing on NBC 29/CW29 December 4

Paramount at the Movies Presents: The Polar Express [G] The Paramount Theater December 19

Local Org. Helps with Virtual Learning This school year, Charlottesville faith-based organization Abundant Life Ministries has been assisting working parents with virtual learning. After surveying local parents in the Prospect neighborhood area, the organization opened five rooms at Christ Episcopal Church in order to provide a space for 24 children to learn during the school day. They also partnered with Buford Middle School to provide space for 14 additional students. Breakfast and lunch are provided by Charlottesville City Schools, and Abundant Life partnered with the PB&J Fund to provide daily snacks. The help of more than 25 local volunteers has also helped make the program possible.

Culturally-Responsible Book Club A group of Mountain View Elementary teachers recently received a $15,000 grant from the Charlottesville Area Community Foundation to support their anti-racism and culturally-responsive virtual book study program. The program allows students to read books centered around diversity, respect and friendships. The students then meet via Zoom to discuss with the teachers, all of who have received culturally responsive certifications. The virtual program ties in with the anti-racism policy started in 2020 by students and Albemarle County School Board leaders.

8

Holiday 2020

Be A Helper & Get Help No Family Should Be Hungry • Blue Ridge Area Food Bank 434-296-3663 • Loaves & Fishes Food Panty 434-996-7868

Every Family Should Have A Safe Home • Charlottesville Rental Relief 434-970-3170 • Piedmont Housing Alliance 434-817-2436 • Salvation Army 434-295-4058 • Shelter for Help in Emergency 434-293-8509

Every Family Deserves Support • Charlottesville Area Community Foundation 434-296-1024 • Monticello Area Community Action Agency 434-295-3171 • Partner for Mental Health 434-977-4673 • Thomas Jefferson Health District 434-972-6244 • United Way 434-972-1701 • Virginia Career Works 434-529-6828 • Virginia Employment Commission 866-832-2363

CharlottesvilleFamily.com

9

{our town community} The

Buzz

AROUND

TOWN Are you changing your usual holiday gathering/travel plans due to COVID? 83% say “yes” “We’ll be staying close to home and just celebrating with our immediate family.”

– Mom of two, Charlottesville

“No large extended family gathering this year. We may travel to my parents, and spend time with them and my siblings. If we do, it would only be 12 of us in total, and we’re discussing how we can create space. We may use an outdoor, covered but open space. Masks will be worn, too.”

– Samantha, Charlottesville

17% say “no” CharlottesvilleFamily Favorite Award Winner

2020

We’re here to help you everyday!

Shop in person, online or by phone for curbside pickup or UPS shipping.

M-F 10-8 | Sat & Sun 10-6 434-977-1965 RebeccasNaturalFood.com

10

Holiday 2020

“We typically just spend Thanksgiving and Christmas with close family anyway, so it shouldn’t be too different from the norm.”

– Mom in Crozet

Visit CharlottesvilleFamily.com to answer next issue’s question:

When a COVID-19 vaccine is made available to the public, will your family get vaccinated?

UVA Health System Supplies STEM Kits Back in the spring, University of Virginia (UVA) Health professionals began working with Charlottesville City Schools’ STEM program to distribute tools for science, technology, engineering and math (STEM) lessons.

They knew the upcoming school year could look very different and wanted to extend a helping hand. After using their resources and receiving support from the community, over $30,000 was raised for the effort. Earlier this fall, Charlottesville City elementary schools distributed the finalized STEM boxes along with other school supplies to families with students in kindergarten through fourth grade.

The students have been completing a STEM assignment every week during this virtual learning time. More information, including how to donate to create more STEM boxes, can be found here: gofundme.com/f/stem-program-forcharlottesville-city-schools.

Local Elementary School Wins National Award In October, Baker-Butler Elementary School was one of four schools in Virginia to be awarded the U.S. Department of Education’s Blue Ribbon Program’s Exemplary Award for closing achievement gaps. The recognition comes after a threeyear collaboration between two University of Virginia (UVA) professors and Baker-Butler Elementary. UVA Assistant Professor of architecture and design thinking Elgin Cleckley and School of Education and Human Development Associate Professor Jennifer Chiu worked with Baker-Butler administrators and teachers to bring design-thinking principles, such as different ways to visualize the decision-making process, into their classrooms.

This year, 367 schools were recognized (317 public and 50 private) at a virtual awards ceremony in November for either their overall academic excellence or their progress in closing achievement gaps among student subgroups. The UVA team is hoping to implement the designthinking approach in other schools in the area.

Give the Gift of YOU!

Contact us today to find out more!

Visit peopleplaces.org or call

Our next training sessions start in January, so don’t delay!

Staunton: (540) 885-8841

FOSTER. ADOPT. MENTOR.

Charlottesville: (434) 979-0335 Harrisonburg: (540) 437-1857

CharlottesvilleFamily.com

11

{our town community} OPENINGS Mariscos El Barco, 625 W Main Street Mashumen, 2208 Fontaine Avenue UVA Breast Care Center, 652 Peter Jefferson Parkway, Suite 200

CLOSINGS Bend Yoga, 420 E Main Street, Suite B Pink Palm, 2136 Barracks Road Sweet Frog, 2130 Barracks Road

ANNOUNCEMENTS Albemarle County Public Schools Superintendent Matthew Haas recommended expanding parental choice for in-person instruction for up to 5,000 students beginning Nov. 9.

Thanks for voting for us!

amily CharlottesvillAeFward Favoriteinner W

2020

Soccer!

An anonymous donation of $500,000 is helping further Albemarle County School’s expanding student mental health programs and services over the next two years. The grant will fund a division-wide program to broaden support for students in crisis, including mental health first aid training for employees who work directly with students as well as the hiring of mental health professionals.

AMF Kegler Lanes is now Bowlero Charlottesville, and it features new lanes, games and food options.

The Charlottesville Free Clinic moved from Rose Hill Drive to 901 Preston Avenue in November.

Children’s Dentistry With a Mother’s Touch located at 895 Rio E Court #B is now Dr. Robert Lunka Bitesize Pediatric and Teen Dentistry.

BIZ BITS Piedmont Pediatrics is offering “FluThru” drive-thru flu vaccinations for children. Visit piedmontpediatrics. net/announcements/flu-thru/ for more information.

Albemarle County Public School Board announced that Virginia Lee Murray Elementary School in Ivy will be the next school in the division to undergo a community-based naming review.

Submit Biz Bits to: editor@IvyLifeAndStyleMedia.com.

The Crystal Connection located at 345 Hillsdale Drive is now Minerals & Mystics.

Thank you for choosing SOCA!

• Leagues for All Youth & Adult Players!

• Summer Camp Options, Top Quality Instruction • Visit Us on the Web or Call...

SOCA 975-5025 www.SOCAspot.org

Be an InsIder Get the latest updates on area fun and news!

Thank you for voting for us!

Visit us at CharlottesvilleFamily.com and sign up for our weekly E-Newsletter packed with calendar highlights, daytrip ideas, and much more!

CharlottesvilleFamily Favorite Award Winner

2020

12

Holiday 2020

crozetbicycleshop.com | 434-996-7224 | 5755 The Square | Crozet

UVA Pediatric Surgeon Works To Feed Families University of Virginia (UVA) Pediatric Surgeon Dr. Jeffrey Gander is working to ensure his patients have access to fresh, healthy food during the pandemic. Gander knows firsthand that many families of children who have chronic health conditions, such as obesity and diabetes, typically need more access to fresh foods. For six years, the Local Food Hub has been helping provide healthy fruits and vegetables to people in need, and Gander made it his mission to partner with the organization to help bring the program to UVA Children’s Hospital. For the program to initially launch, funds needed to be raised. To date, Gander’s efforts have brought in over $8,000 of his $10,000 goal, and he hopes to use this money to bring healthy food to 10–15 families and then expand to more families in the future. To learn more and to donate, click here.

CharlottesvilleFamily.com

13

{our town community}

Local Youth Address Sidewalk Safety Twelve-year-old Buford Middle School student Isla Sederberg took action to try and help keep her Charlottesville neighborhood safe. Sederberg held the “Stay Alive on Yorktown Drive� event, a youth-led march with bake sales, in her busy neighborhood to bring awareness for the need of a sidewalk. At least two Charlottesville City Council members attended the event in the Greenbrier and Meadowbrook Heights neighborhoods and spoke with the residents about the need for a sidewalk to keep pedestrians and bikers safe. The awareness event raised over $400, which Sederberg and her family plan to donate to several area nonprofit organizations, including the Kindness Cafe, Blue Ridge Area Food Bank, the Haven and the CharlottesvilleAlbemarle SPCA.

14

Holiday 2020

Carve out time for yourself.

This season, try new recipes, discover new experiences and read exciting local stories on Wine & Country Life’s website. You can also read the current issue for free online. See page 73 for more info.

CharlottesvilleFamily.com

15

{our town calendar}

to

Things Do

HOLIDAY 2020

Click on the images below to go to our online calendar for events!

Events y l i m a F r o Click f Festivals &

Click for Seas onal Fun

es

Click f or Kids & Activ ’ Classes ities 16

Holiday 2020

ass l C nt s e r a r P tivitie o f k Ac Clic &

is proud to support Toy Lift!

It Only Takes

ONE

to make a difference this holiday season!

202 0 TOY LIFT

The Toy Lift will take place over 7 days this year beginning Saturday November 28 and running through Friday December 4.

Please visit the website for more information on the new donation process.

toylift.org Click to download and print!

{our town calendar}

Holiday Fun! Places to Enjoy Christmas Lights This Season

For a spectacular array of activities

This year, there are still so many fun activities you can safely do to celebrate and get in the holiday spirit! All across the area, you can find a variety of light shows, holiday parks and other wonderful activities that you won’t want to miss out on with the family.

and amazing Christmas lights, visit Christmas

Wonderland

at

Creative

Works Farm in Waynesboro. This year, Creative Works Farm is offering a walk-through light display, musical light

show,

musical

performances,

cookies and hot chocolate, gingerbread cookie decorating, Christmas ornament making, a wagon ride and the chance to see animals at the barn. Santa will even be there! Tickets are $10 a person and free for kids 2 years and under, and the proceeds benefit Camp LIGHT, a summer camp for kids with special needs and at-risk youth. Book your tickets at creativeworksfarm.org/ events/christmas-wonderland/

starting

December 1, and enjoy visits every Friday and Saturday leading up to Christmas day.

Another place to see lights to the west

18

Holiday 2020

of Charlottesville is the Celebration of

a traditional turkey dinner along with

year’s holiday event is being shared

Lights at Gypsy Hill Park in Staunton.

holiday frites and gingerbread-spiced

virtually on their facebook page on

For the past 15 years, Gypsy Hill has

funnel cake. Fifteen roller coasters and

December 21, 22, 23 and 24 at 7 p.m. To

graced its visitors with glowing holiday

rides will be open for your enjoyment,

watch this free event, visit facebook.com/

lights, open to anyone to come and

and you can be certain Busch Gardens

metrorichmondzoo.

enjoy. Entry is free, but you must make

is taking the necessary precautions

Also in Richmond, Lewis Ginter

a reservation at celebrationoflights.org

with masks and limited capacity. Make

Botanical Garden is hosting its annual

ahead of time due to covid restrictions

sure to make a reservation online

Dominion Energy GardenFest of Lights

and safety measures.

ahead of time, planning a visit any

from November 23–January 10, 2021.

Another place your family can

time between November and January 3,

This favorite tradition has seen changes

explore is Busch Gardens’ Christmas

2021. Admission starts at $39.99, so get

due social distancing, but it will still

Celebration

Williamsburg. This

your tickets soon and have a night in

include a variety of events. Thousands

event

a Christmas wonderland, surrounded

of lights will line garden paths, and

by

beautiful

decorate trees, giant flowers, unicorn,

around the park that will be fun

Christmas music. Visit buschgardens.

dragons and more. Your family will also

for

com/williamsburg/ for more info.

enjoy outdoor model trains, dinners

in

family-friendly incredible all

activities

ages. You

is

full

and can

of

scenery

experience

dazzling

lights

and

village entertainment, a Gingerbread

Since 2003, the Metro Richmond Zoo

Scavenger Hunt and festive holiday

has hosted its annual event, Miracle of

shopping, as well as meet Santa in his

Christmas. This live presentation of

For a history lesson disguised by the

workshop and try some sweet culinary

the Christmas story features its own

excitement and theatrical presentations

treats. For a larger dining experience,

zoo animals. Once again, they will be

of Christmas in American history, head

take a seat at Das Festhaus and enjoy

hosting this nativity pageant, yet this

to Jamestown to experience a true

and hot chocolate. For more info, visit lewisginter.org.

CharlottesvilleFamily.com

19

{our town calendar} Colonial Christmas. The Jamestown

musical performances. You can enjoy

Settlement will be open December

a full colonial Christmas experience

19–31 and will give you a glimpse into

by visiting both museums for $27.50

the holiday traditions of the 17th and

for adults and $13.50 for ages 6–12,

18th century Virginia. Enjoy interpretive

which includes unlimited access to

programs and demonstrations that

the museums for seven days. Visit

give you insight into how people during

historyisfun.org/jamestown-settlement/a-

this time were celebrating Christmas.

colonial-christmas/ for more info.

You’ll also see decorations on forts and

To continue your historical tour or

demonstrations of fancy cooking, along

start a new Christmas tradition, visit

with presentations of winter activities

Mount Vernon this season for their

like food preservation, and hunting tools

various events. This experience will

and techniques. This experience will get

combine traditions of Christmas past

you in the holiday spirit. Tickets to this

with traditions of Christmas today,

colonial Christmas event are $17.50 for

giving you insight into the world of

adults and $8.25 for ages 6–12.

George Washington and everyone who

Nearby, the American Revolution

lived and worked at Mount Vernon. There

Museum at Yorktown will also be

are quite a few nighttime and daytime

featuring

Christmas

activities, by reservation—all which will

Revolution,

take place between November 27 and

with demonstrations of open-hearth

December 31. On December 18 and 19,

cooking in the farm kitchen as well as

take your family to Mount Vernon to

sing-alongs to traditional carols and

enjoy a choreographed fireworks show

during

accounts the

of

American

ON SALE NOW!

HOW CHARLOTTESVILLE GOT ITS THEATER BACK WRITTEN BY: JANE GOODMAN • ILLUSTRATIONS BY: KEITH DAMIANI

PURCHASE THIS STORYBOOK ONLINE AT THEPARAMOUNT.NET

Want More Adventures?

The Ultimate Go-To Guide is filled with over 50 tried and true daytrip options around the area.

THE PARAMOUNT THEATER

215 EAST MAIN STREET, CHARLOTTESVILLE, VA • 434.979.1333

CharlottesvilleFamily’s Ultimate Go-To Guide 2020.

Get your digital copy at

.com Daytrips • Organizer • Directory & More!

20

Holiday 2020

Imagine a Day without Water Art Contest Theme: what water means to me Accepting Art Entries: October 21st - November 23rd Submission options include: online, by mail, or in-person.

Online Fan Favorite Voting: December 2nd - 11th Go to our website to cast your vote for your favorite submission from the top entries!

Winter Glow at Mount Vernon. Photo by Buddy Secor

Charlottesville.gov/ArtContest

to the sound of Christmas carols. This experience is $22 and includes a bonfire with hot chocolate and cider, as well as other illuminations and the chance to speak with soldiers. On three separate weekends starting in November, you can experience the Winter Glow, including beautiful winter lights that enchant the trees and cast blue, purple, orange

Virtual Programs

and other colorful lights upon George Washington’s mansion and landscape.

Bring the Museum Home!

Listen to the sounds of the Christmas

December’s Virtual & At-Home Learning Opportunities:

carolers and make a visit to an 18thcentury winter encampment. Don’t forget to stop by the shop for artisan goods and Christmas gifts. Tickets for this event are $30. To learn about other daytime events, visit mountvernon.org.

Free Drop-Ins (All Ages): • StoryZoom - Mondays • A-B-STEAM - Thursdays • Meet the Symphony - Dec. 4 • Cabin Fever - Dec. 11 & 18

Tot Box (Ages 2-4 + Adult): • Playdates - Dec. 2, 9, 16, 23 STEAM Series (Ages 4 & Up): • Winter Traditions Around the World - Dec. 4, 11, 18 Workshops (Ages 4 & Up): • DIY Gifts - Dec. 8 • Frozen Fantasy - Dec. 15 Holiday Diorama (Ages 3 & Up): • Arctic Exploration - On Sale Through Dec. 11

Sign Up Now at vadm.org/programs Thank You to CharlottesvilleFamily for Donating This Ad on Behalf of the Museum

CharlottesvilleFamily.com

21

{our town calendar}

Tree Farms!

This year, enjoy venturing out as a family to a local tree farm. Be sure to call ahead and ask if they offer pre-cut trees or if you will be cutting your own, as well as what other activities are available for kids.

22

Holiday 2020

Bees & Trees Farm Elkwood 540-423-9020, beesandtrees.biz Belmont Christmas Tree Farm Spotsylvania 540-854-6757, facebook.com/ belmontchristmastreefarm/ Claybrooke Tree Farm Mineral 540-872-3817, claybrookefarm.com Chisholm Vineyards at Adventure Farm Earlysville 434-971-8796, chisholmvineyards.com Christmas Trees at The Market at Grelen Somerset 540-672-7268 themarketatgrelen.com/christmastrees Foxfire Christmas Tree Farm Scottsville 434-286-3445, foxfireva.net

**Greene Meadows Farm Open the Friday after Thanksgiving until Christmas Eve, Friday–Sunday, 10am–5pm Stanardsville Choose and cut White Pine, Scotch Pine (limited), White Spruce (limited), Canaan Fir (limited) and Leyland Cypress (limited), or choose a fresh pre-cut Fraser Fir or Concolor Fir. Fresh wreaths, centerpieces and garland will also be available. Visit with lambs and sheep in the petting zoo while you sip a complimentary cup of cider or hot chocolate.

434-990-1999 greenemeadowsfarm.com Long Meadow Tree Farm Waynesboro 540-649-4307, facebook.com/ longmeadowtreefarm

Spruce Rock Farm Brightwood 540-543-2309, sprucerockfarm.com Stonehearth Christmas Tree Farm Leon 540-547-2576, facebook.com/stonehearth-christmastree-farm-181376008540160 Evergreen Christmas Tree Farm Evergreen 434-610-4540, virginiachristmastrees.org/farms/staples 12 Ridges Vineyard and Christmas Tree Farm Vesuvius 434-996-4252 12ridges.com/christmas-trees **See ad below

Saunders Brothers Farm Market Piney River 434-277-5455, saundersbrothersfarmmarket.com

eene Meadow r G s Farm A Traditional Christmas Experience Less than 30 minutes from Charlottesville!

choose & cut:

White Pine Canaan Fir (limited) fresh pre-cut

Frazer Fir Concolor Fir Canaan Fir Douglas Fir

wreaths • garland

Visit the Christmas Shop to help outfit your perfect tree.

Visit the lambs in our Petting Zoo while enjoying a complimentary cup of hot cocoa or cider, a candy cane and coloring book.

Open the Friday after Thanksgiving

Fri., Sat., Sun. 10 am - 5 pm

434.990.1999

www.greenemeadowsfarm.com CharlottesvilleFamily.com

23

{living well new mom}

Apps for A New Mom

New Mom

5 Helpful Parenting Apps

Being a parent is a difficult task, but it’s one of the most rewarding experiences, especially if you have some help to take the stress away. With so much access to technology and endless resources online, there are many ways you can help yourself ease the transition into parenting. We have compiled a list of helpful and useful apps that will help you navigate through parenthood, while keeping you sane. Whether it is tracking your baby’s everyday needs, or finding a park to play in that day, these apps will help you get into and stay in the swing of things.

Baby Connect. For all of your organizational needs, Baby Connect allows you to track your pumping schedule and recall which side you nursed baby on last, as well as help track baby’s sleep, moods, allergies and medical history. You can even synchronize your account with others so your significant other, nannies and other family members have access to important information that will make childcare a whole lot easier.

by Liza Stoner Cozi. This easy-to-use app provides a one-stop place for important family information. You can share your calendar with your family, set reminders, and share grocery lists, to-do lists and even recipes. Having everything in one place is extremely helpful for family organization and to remember important appointments or extracurriculars. This app has been featured on the Today Show as a “must-have app” accessible on any mobile device, tablet or computer.

CineMama. Leading up to childbirth, this app gives you a space to store photos and track your pregnancy. With this documentation, you can make a time-lapsed video of your growing baby bump, as well as track how you felt throughout the pregnancy. March of Dimes sponsors the app, so it offers helpful pregnancy advice week after week. You can also track your memories and document your mood on the mood meter. Preparing for a child to come is a stressful and exciting time, and this beautiful process deserves some documentation.

Share what parenting apps FitMama. Having a baby is so exciting and life changing, you are finding helpful, so but it does put a lot of stress on your body and health. we can share it with other Finding a new, normal routine is difficult and sometimes a parents. Email us at editor@ little extra motivation is necessary. FitMama is unique in that IvyLifeandStyleMedia.com. it gives new moms daily 5- to 10-minute workouts and fitness motivation that you can incorporate into each day. FitMama offers many different classes like Tabata, Kickbox, Pilates, Mama Dance, HIIT workouts and many more, which are all designed by professional fitness trainers.

Playground Buddy. The next time you go on a family walk or vacation, make sure to have Playground Buddy downloaded so you can easily locate some outdoor fun. Playground Buddy is a free app database of over 200,000 playgrounds and gives you directions to and a street view of each. The app can also send details and directions to others, regardless if they have the app.

These are just a few of the many apps that can be helpful, so take the time to figure out what is best for you as you are preparing for childbirth and starting a family. Even as your family grows, many of these apps can continue to help you throughout parenthood.

WHAT APP DO YOU LIKE?

Liza is a student at UVA and a Charlottesville local dedicated to making her community a better place, and enjoys exploring and writing about all that Virginia has to offer.

24

Holiday 2020

THANK YOU FOR VOTING FOR US!

CharlottesvilleFamily Favorite Award Winner

2020

Your child’s safety is our number one priority Staff training hours exceed licensing standards 150% High tech cameras with video and audio

NOVEMBER EXCLUSIVE During the month of November all new, full-time enrollments will receive 2 FREE Weeks!*

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Be an InsIder Get the latest updates on area fun and news!

Music and movement classes for babies, toddlers, preschoolers and the grownups who love them.

CharlottesvilleFamily Favorite Award Winner

2020

Visit us at CharlottesvilleFamily.com and sign up for our weekly E-Newsletter packed with calendar highlights, holiday outings, and much more!

THANK YOU

FOR VOTING FOR US!

Gift Certificates Available blueridgemusictogether.com • 434.293.6361 Sessions begin in September, January, March & June in Charlottesville & Crozet CharlottesvilleFamily.com

25

{living well healthy family}

Staying Healthy

Keeping Colds & Respiratory Illnesses at Bay

Healthy Family

Viral illnesses are commonplace in the winter. With the pandemic still a concern, keeping your family healthy is more important than ever.

Common Respiratory Illnesses. Most colds are caused by the rhinovirus or coronavirus, with symptoms like: sore throat, cough, congestion, sneezing and runny nose. More severe cases may also include headaches or muscle aches.

Other common viruses this time of year include adenovirus, which causes coldlike symptoms along with pink eye and bronchitis. These viruses mostly cause symptoms in the upper respiratory tract, but some may experience diarrhea or rashes. If your child experiences a sudden, severe sore throat, they might have strep. “Strep needs to be treated with an antibiotic,” says Dr. Gretchen Brantley, a pediatrician at Piedmont Pediatrics. “Strep can be differentiated from viral illnesses by… headache, sore throat and abdominal pain.”

How to Treat Infections. “Viral illnesses are quite common, and most of the time parents can care for their children at home without a trip to the doctor’s

by Katharine Paljug office,” says Brantley. “Keep[ing] children comfortable while we wait for their immune systems to fight these illnesses on their own is the goal.” If you can keep your child comfortable with lots of fluids and careful use of a pain reliever like ibuprofen, Brantley says a visit to the doctor is probably unnecessary. Most colds or viral respiratory illnesses will heal on their own after a few days of rest, but you should contact your doctor if your child experiences any of the following: • Eye drainage accompanied by redness or eye pain, • Persistent discomfort or fussiness, • Inability to sleep, • Fever for more than three days or higher than 102.5° F, • Coughing to the point of vomiting, and • Sandpaper-like rash.

You should also visit a doctor immediately if your child experiences extreme fatigue or weakness, difficulty For more information on breathing or neck stiffness. keeping the family healthy, Keeping Kids Healthy. Teaching kids good hygiene visit healthychildren.org. habits is the best way to prevent colds and other common illnesses. Encourage them to wash their hands before eating and to avoid touching their faces or biting their nails. With younger children, Brantley suggests making hand washing a game. “Have them ‘pretend to be a pediatrician’ and wash their hands with soap before and after playing with other people,” she says.

“They should sing the ABCs twice through while scrubbing.”

“A child’s immune system is also helped by getting enough sleep and eating healthy foods,” adds Brantley. “Fruits and vegetables have many nutrients that help fight infection, and five servings of fruits and vegetables per day has been shown to increase immune response.” Even with the best care, children will still get sick from time to time. It is impossible to guard against all of them.

“The good news is that a child who’s exposed to viral infections will make protective antibodies to these illnesses,” says Brantley, which will strengthen their immune system and make them less likely to get sick as they get older.

MORE TIPS?

Katharine is a freelance writer, Bloom’s Family Health Editor and mother to one busy toddler. You can see more of her work at www.katharine-writes.com.

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Holiday 2020

BRING JOY TO THEIR WORLD BUY ONE 60-MINUTE MASSAGE SESSION

GET ONE FREE* CharlottesvilleFamily Favorite Award Winner

2020

Charlottesville 420 Twentyninth Place Court (434) 977-3689 M-F 8a-10p | S 8a-8p | Su 10a-6p

In location only.

Now through December 31, 2020.

Short Pump 4346rate.Pouncey RdEach voucher *Promotional offer ends December 31, 2020 and only while supplies last. Limit 2 per transaction. Service voucher must be purchased at the non-member Promotional VoucherTract has no cash value. is valid toward a 60-minute massage, facial, or stretch session. Promotional Voucher is for promotional purposes only and cannot be used in conjunction with any other offers. Vouches(s) may not be replaced if lost or stolen. Service voucher and Promotional Voucher must be present upon check-in. Each voucher does not include gratuity. All session times include up to at least 10 minutes of consultation and dressing, which occur pre and post service. Rate and services may vary by location and session. For a specific list of services, check with specific franchised location or visit MassageEnvy.com. Additional taxes and fees may apply.

Other rules may apply. Each location is independently owned and operated. TERM AND CONDITIONS ARE APPLIED TO VOUCHERS. c 2020 ME SPE FRANCHISING, LLC._ME-DNLD-1922-TSLR *Promotional offer ends December 31, 2020 and only while supplies last. Limit 2 per transaction. Service voucher must be purchased at the non-member rate. Promotional Voucher has no cash value. Each voucher is valid toward a 60-minute massage, facial, or stretch session. Promotional Voucher is for promotional purposes only and cannot be used in conjunction with any other offers. Voucher(s) may not be replaced if lost or stolen. Service voucher and Promotional Voucher must be present upon check-in. Each voucher does not include gratuity. All session times include up to at least 10 minutes of consultation and dressing, which occur pre and post service. Rates and services may vary by location and session. For a specific list of services, check with specific franchised location or visit MassageEnvy.com. Additional taxes and fees may apply. Other rules may apply. Each location is independently owned and operated. TERMS AND CONDITIONS ARE APPLIED TO VOUCHERS. Š2020 ME SPE Franchising, LLC._ME-DNLD-1922-TSLR

A safe, nurturing, age-appropriate learning environment for children that fosters inquiry, exploration and reflection.

Now Enrolling Infant | Toddler | Preschool | School Age

CharlottesvilleFamily Favorite Award Winner

2020

Call Today: 434-956-4312 Learn more at

playfullearnerspreschool.com facebook.com/PLAYFULLEARNERSPRESCHOOL/

325 Rivanna Plaza Drive, Charlottesville, VA CharlottesvilleFamily.com

27

{living well home & garden}

“Without hard work, nothing grows but weeds."

– Gordon B. Hinckley

Pantry Organization for Parents On-the-Go

​ t one time or another, A all parents struggle with keeping their pantry organized. With kids home more right now, balancing at-home learning and household chores with jobs certainly fills our plates.

For helping streamline your family’s day-to-day schedule, here are top tips for organizing your pantry so meal prep is a breeze.

Words by Lexi Clatterbuck Photo by Robert Radifera

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Holiday 2020

​Shelving. It depends on how many shelves are in your pantry, but you want to prioritize your food from bottom to top shelves. Put your most used foods toward the bottom of the pantry for easy accessibility, and especially ones that are okay for little hands to get into.

Healthy snacks like crackers, trail mixes or fruit on these easy-to-reach shelves will encourage better eating habits. It will also help you see when supplies are running low, allow your kids to pack their own lunches or help themselves when you are busy, and avoid any dangerous climbing while adult eyes aren’t around.

From there on up, store regularly used items like vegetables, pasta, seasonings and spices then flour, sugar and baking supplies. Priority will help you and your kiddos stay on track. ​Storage Containers. Find baskets, glass or plastic containers to store your food items. Baskets work great for bigger items like fruits, veggies or potatoes, depending on the space; and glass or sturdy plastic containers are perfect for storing flour, sugar, pasta and seasonings.

Washable containers are also a plus, so

you can toss them into the dishwasher when needed for a quick clean. You can find these containers at a variety of local store or even order them online. By being able to see the contents, it will help you avoid overbuying and find items more quickly. Worried you will forget what is in the container? Try using a washable black marker to label the jars by food and expiration date. “Adding labels to both sections and containers will allow your pint-sized helpers to assist in putting away groceries or even act as sous chef,” suggest CharlottesvilleFamily’s Editorin-Chief Jennifer Bryerton. ​Categorize Your Food. You can also organize your food by type. It depends on whether you have compartmentalized shelving or if you have broader, long shelves. Consider adding wire or plastic shelf dividers in your pantry to help you know when one category ends and another begins. When organizing your foods by category, you can place like items near each other for better meal planning. For instance, consider placing grains and starches together like quinoa, couscous, rice, potatoes and pasta. You

Pantry Check – Grocery List

Pantry Check is an easy way to manage your grocery usage, plan meals, shop, track expiration dates and avoid food waste. It’s an app that serves as an inventory tracker with expiration date reminders and more. Free with

&

in-app purchases.

Home

Garden

R.S.V.P. Drawer Spice Rack

Efficiency is a necessity in the kitchen, especially when so many other things need done. Clear your counters and organize your spices with this helpful drawer spice rack. It includes 12 glass spice bottles with stainless steel lids. Available at The Happy Cook for $27.

CharlottesvilleFamily Favorite Award Winner

2020

since 1965

roast prime rib certified angus steaks succulent seafood fine wine | piano bar

2018 Holiday dr CHarlottesville 434.296.4630 aberdeenbarn.com reservations recommended CharlottesvilleFamily.com

29

{living well home & garden}

“For every minute spent organizing, an hour is earned.”

– Benjamin Franklin

might also put your baking supplies together, such as everything from sugar and flour to vanilla extract, cocoa, etc.

Snacks can even have their own category.

This system will help you and your kids easily locate items. ​Safety. It is incredibly helpful to organize your foods by accessibility, but if you have small kiddos who like to explore, you may want to rethink how you are keeping little hands out of items that could lead to choking or pulling down heavier containers. For glass jars, heavier containers filled with flour and canned goods, you may want to put them higher and push them to the backs of the shelves to avoid accidents. If you have a door on your pantry and little crawlers and walkers, consider adding locks to the pantries that only older kids and adults can unhinge. ​Style. Organization does not have to be boring; you can also use it to showcase your family’s style. Consider adding in some decorative plastic containers or personalized labels to your pantry. It will help your kiddos find their foods for school lunches and help you remember who wanted what snack. Mixing and matching containers and textures like baskets is another way to give your overfull pantry a cleaner and more appealing look. To give shelves breathing room, try working in kitchen appliances like mixers, measuring cups and blenders among the ingredients and food items. ​Décor. Speaking of style, décor can add your family’s personal touch to the space. You could purchase patterned wallpaper or paint the walls behind the shelves. Warmers colors are perfect for complementing woods and neutral tones and can disguise any splattered surfaces until you can get around to cleaning.

You can also add décor like vases and trinkets higher up, and a dry erase board for jotting down items running low.

No matter how you choose to ​ organize your pantry, make sure its style, organization and safety suit your family. *For more images of this beautiful pantry and home, get Book 10 of Wine & Country Life at wineandcountryshop.com.

Lexi is an intern with Ivy Life & Style Media and enjoys writing about all things home and family.

30

Holiday 2020

Helping you create unique environments GARDEN CENTER, GIFT SHOP & LANDSCAPING

Mulch, Soil, Compost, Gravel–Delivery & Pickup Gravel Driveway Installations Bird Baths, Fountains, Urns, Statuary & More!

Decorative Concrete Pavers Natural Stone Manufactured Stone

CharlottesvilleFamily Favorite Award Winner

alliedconcrete.com

2020

Open 7 Days a Week Monday - Saturday 8-6 Sunday 10-5 434-977-3999 Rt. 250 W & Ivy Depot

in the heart of Ivy, Virginia

CharlottesvilleFamily Favorite Award Winner

2020

Thank you, Charlottesville!

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113 W Market St, Charlottesville monsoonsiamcville.com | 434.971.1515 CharlottesvilleFamily.com

31

{living well food & family}

TASTY TRADITION Easy Roast Turkey

Ingredients • 1 fresh turkey breast, rinsed and patted dry • 1 oven bag for turkey, 8 to 24-pound size • Vegetable oil spray • 1 tablespoon flour • 1 large Vidalia onion, coarsely chopped • 2 celery stalks, coarsely chopped • 2 carrots, peeled and coarsely chopped • 1 stick butter, softened • 2 tablespoons of salt • 2 tablespoons garlic pepper • 1 teaspoon thyme • 1 teaspoon sage Directions 1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

2. Shake flour in oven bag, then place bag in a large roasting pan at least two inches deep. To reduce having the turkey stick to the bag, spray the inside of the bag with nonstick spray.

3. Chop onions, celery and carrots,

and place in oven bag. Rub softened butter liberally all over turkey.

Sprinkle salt, garlic pepper, thyme and sage all over turkey (inside it, too!).

4. Place turkey in oven bag on top of vegetables. Close oven bag with nylon tie, then cut six ½-inch slits in the top. I recommend inserting a meat thermometer through a slit in the bag into the turkey to monitor cooking temperature. Tuck ends of the bag in the pan, ensuring the bag is not overhanging the pan.

5. Bake approximately 2½ to 3 hours or until meat thermometer reads 165 degrees Fahrenheit. (Note: I allow a little more time so that I can brown the top of the bird to a beautiful, golden color. Don’t be afraid to use your broiler at the very end, if necessary. Just don’t walk away from it if you do.)

6. Allow turkey to stand in the bag for 15 minutes before opening and carving. Reserve bag liquid for gravy.

There are a ton of recipes out there on how to roast a turkey. I’ve tried a lot of them. A few years ago, I devised this no-fail recipe and have never looked back! The secret to the juiciest, most delicious bird ever is an oven bag. This little bag takes all the guesswork out of making a tender turkey. It’s easy and doesn’t require my constant attention, leaving me free to work on some side dishes. I normally bake a turkey breast, but this recipe works for a whole turkey, too.

– Jennifer, online editor

32

Holiday 2020

Grandma Ingredients • 1 bag of stuffing bread cubes • 1 stalk of celery, chopped • 1 small onion or 1 bunch of green onions • 1 large or 2 small apples • 1 small can of turkey broth (chicken or veggie broths work also) • 2 tablespoons butter or margarine • 2 eggs, beaten Directions 1. Place the bag of bread cubes in a large bowl.

2. Sautee butter in a skillet and add rinsed and chopped celery (as much as you like) and onion just long enough to soften.

3. Add chopped, rinsed and cored apple(s) to skillet. You can leave the skin on the apple if you like.

4. Add one can of broth to the sautéed mixture and let cool. (You can also use one cup of the

NS

Holiday Recipes from Our Families to Yours

Pumpkin Roll Ingredients Cake • ¼ cup powdered sugar • ¾ cup all purpose flour • ½ teaspoon baking powder • ½ teaspoon cinnamon • ½ teaspoon pumpkin pie spice • ¼ teaspoon salt • 3 large eggs, room temperature • 1 cup granulated sugar • 2/3 cup canned pumpkin • 1 teaspoon vanilla extract • 1 cup chopped walnuts (optional) • Powdered sugar (for dusting on top)

a’s Stuffing broth from your cooked turkey instead of the canned broth.)

5. Beat eggs, then add to stuffing cubes and toss.

6. Pour in cooled skillet mixture and toss.

7. Pour mixture into coated baking dish and bake covered for 30 minutes at 350 degrees.

8. Uncover dish and let bake for 10 more minutes to crisp the top of the stuffing.

My maternal grandmother started this recipe when my mom and her 9 siblings were kids. Since then, my mom has tweaked and adjusted it, but kept most of it the same. It’s one of my favorite dishes during the holiday season, and I love knowing that we are enjoying something my grandma had created out of love for her family and that my mom has carried on.

– Sarah, senior editor

Filling • 8 ounces (one package) cream cheese, room temperature • 1 cup powdered sugar • 6 tablespoons butter, softened • 1 teaspoon vanilla extract Directions Cake 1. Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Grease 15 x 10-inch jellyroll pan. Line with wax paper, then grease and flour paper.

2. Combine flour, baking powder, baking soda, cinnamon, pumpkin pie spice and salt in a small bowl.

3. In a separate larger mixing bowl, beat eggs, granulated sugar and vanilla extract until thick. Beat in pumpkin.

4. Stir in flour mixture until completely mixed.

5. Spread mixture evenly into the prepared pan. Sprinkle with nuts (optional).

6. Bake for 13–15 minutes or until the

top of the cake springs back when touched. (If using a dark-colored pan, begin checking for doneness at 11 minutes.)

7. While baking, sprinkle a thin, cotton kitchen towel with powdered sugar.

8. When done, immediately loosen and turn cake onto the prepared towel. Carefully peel off wax paper.

9. Roll up the cake and towel together, starting with the narrow end. Cool on a wire rack.

Filling 1. Beat cream cheese, powdered sugar, butter and vanilla extract in a small mixing bowl until smooth.

2. Carefully unroll cake when cooled and spread cream cheese mixture over cake. Reroll cake. Wrap in plastic wrap and refrigerate for at least one hour. Sprinkle with powdered sugar before serving (if desired).

My mom, Betty, has been making this pumpkin roll for Thanksgiving and Christmas for as long as I can remember.

I recall many times when I was younger how my cousin would ask me, “Your mom is bringing a pumpkin roll, right?” Even my brother, Steven, who detests all things cheese (yes, he’s insane) devours this dessert every year despite the cream cheese filling. Because of the rolling of the cake, it’s not exactly an “easy” recipe, but my mom nails it every time.

– Ellen, associate editor

CharlottesvilleFamily.com

33

{living well holiday shopping} Gifts for All Ages

BUY LOCAL shopping guide

The Paramount Theater See ad page 20

Crozet Bicycle Shop See ad page 12

Gifts for Children

Gifts for the Home 3 Cats Photo See ad page 48

Kids Lift Foundation See ad page 17

Feast!

See ad page 37

Shenanigans See ad page 34

Ivy Corner Garden Center See ad page 31

Support the community by doing your holiday shopping at Charlottesville’s many locally owned stores!

Health & Fitness for Grown-Ups

Jen Fariello Photography

Massage Envy

See ad page 14

See ad page 27 Rebecca’s Natural Food YMCA

See ad page 10

See ad page 70 Robert Radifera Photography

Entertainment Gifts

See ad page 44

Charlottesville Wine & Country Shop

Vintage Swings

See ad page 35

See ad page 35

Now offering in-store and online shopping!

Complimentary gift wrap.

Gouda cheese made with love.

For more information, visit

601 West Main Street (434) 295-4797 | Shenanigans.Toys

olamonastery.org

3365 Monastery Drive, Crozet

Thank you CharlottesvilleFamily Charlottesville Favorite Award Winner for voting for us!

2020 locally owned and operated

313 East Main Street CharlottesvilleFamily Favorite Award Winner

2020

34

Holiday 2020

Best Locally-Owned Toy Store

Charlottesville (434) 234-3634

Top

Kid Gifts

from The Wine & Country Shop

Chickapig Board Game

Garden Gloves for Country Kids

Shop Shop

Baby Goat Blankie

TM

ABCville by Karen Moulis and Cary Oliva (signed)

Baby Goat Rattle Elegant S elections FFrom romVirginia’s Virginia Wine Country Elegant Selections Wine’s Country Road, the Village of Ivy | Monday-Saturday 10-6 4282 Ivy4282RIvyoad | wineandcountryshop.com

CharlottesvilleFamily.com

35

{living well holiday shopping} Top

Gifts

from local shops Alakazam Toys Crazy Forts

Shenanigans Toys Robots Kinoptik Whimsies Unicorn Paradise

The End Games Magic the Gathering Series

36

Holiday 2020

Play It Again Sports US Kids UL WT-10U 6 Piece Graphite/Regular Golf Club Set

The Happy Cook Mrs. Anderson’s Kid’s Baking Set

Green Bean Baby Boutique Art Cards for Baby

New Dominion Bookshop We’re Going to Be O.K. by Leigh-Ann Webb

CharlottesvilleFamily.com

37

{inspiration family favorites}

I C N N G U .

O ..

N N A g Picks for n i n n i Your W

Family-Friendly Fun and Serv ices

We asked and you answered! Nearly 1,000 of you shared your favorite places to eat, shop and play in the ninth annual CharlottesvilleFamily Favorite Awards.

Discover the top vote winners here!

FAMILY FUN FAMILY DAYTRIP (WITHIN 3 HOURS) 1. Williamsburg 2. Washington, D.C. 2. Richmond 3. Virginia Beach

HISTORIC ATTRACTION (WITHIN 1 HOUR) 1. Thomas Jefferson’s Monticello 2. Frontier Culture Museum 3. James Madison’s Montpelier 3. James Monroe’s Highland

FESTIVAL 1. The Festy Experience 2. Lockn’ Festival 3. Crozet Arts & Crafts Festival 3. Tom Tom Summit & Festival

CHILDREN’S MUSEUM 1. Virginia Discovery Museum (pg 21) 2. Children’s Museum of Richmond 3. Amazement Square

HIKE 1. Humpback Rock 2. Ragged Mountain Nature Area 3. Saunders-Monticello Trail

38

Holiday 2020

LOCAL RESORT/SPA 1. The Spa at Boar’s Head Resort 2. The Greenbrier Resort 3. The Omni Homestead Resort

SPORTS RESORT 1. Wintergreen Resort 2. Massanutten Resort 3. Snowshoe Mountain Resort MOVIE THEATER 1. Alamo Drafthouse Cinema 2. Violet Crown Cinema 3. Regal Stonefield Stadium & IMAX MUSIC VENUE 1. UVA’s John Paul Jones Arena 2. Jefferson Theater 3. The Paramount Theater (pg 20) CITY PARK/PLAYGROUND 1. Greenleaf Park – Charlottesville Parks & Rec 2. Pen Park – Charlottesville Parks & Rec 3. Riverview Park – Charlottesville Parks & Rec

COUNTY PARK/PLAYGROUND 1. Pen Park – Charlottesville Parks & Rec 2. Darden Towe Park – Albemarle County Parks & Rec 3. Walnut Creek Park – Charlottesville Parks & Rec PICK-YOUR-OWN FARM 1. Carter Mountain Orchard 2. Chiles Peach Orchard 3. Critzer Family Farm PRIVATE POOL 1. ACAC Adventure Central 2. Farmington Country Club 3. Boar’s Head Resort PUBLIC POOL 1. Smith Aquatic & Fitness Center 2. Onesty Family Aquatic Center 3. Crozet YMCA (Piedmont Family YMCA) (pg 70) RAINY DAY OUTING 1. Movies 2. Jump Trampoline Park 3. JMRL Libraries

STUDIOS FOR CRAFTING 1. Lazy Daisy Ceramics Inc. & The Pottery Paintin’ Place 2. Muse Paintbar 3. The Hive THEATRE GROUP 1. Live Arts 2. Four County Players 3. American Shakespeare Center THEME PARK 1. Busch Gardens Williamsburg 2. Kings Dominion 3. Great Wolf Lodge Water Park UVA SPORTS TEAM 1. Basketball 2. Football 3. Soccer ZOO 1. Smithsonian’s National Zoological Park 2. Virginia Safari Park 3. Metro Richmond Zoo 3. Natural Bridge Zoo (pg 23)

PARTIES & PORTRAITS LOCAL BAKERY 1. Chandler’s Bakery 1. Paradox Pastry 2. Albemarle Baking Co. 3. Cakes by Rachel PARTY ENTERTAINMENT 1. Bounce, Play-n-Create 2. Wes Iseli & Party Magic – Magician 3. Foxboro Farm Travel Petting Zoo 3. Cville Inflatables PARTY LOCATION 1. Bounce, Play-n-Create 2. Wildrock 3. Jump Cville Trampoline Park LOCAL PARTY SUPPLIES 1. The Party Starts Here 2. Rock Paper Scissors 3. Caspari

CharlottesvilleFamily.com

39

{inspiration family favorites} PHOTOGRAPHER 1. Jen Fariello Photography (pg 14) 2. Rob Garland Photography 2. Robert Radifera Photography (pg 44) 3. Sarah Cramer Shields 3. 3 Cats Photo (pg 48)

BOOKSTORE FOR KID’S TITLES – LOCAL 1. Shenanigans (pg 34) 2. Green Valley Book Fair 3. New Dominion Bookshop: New Books & Gifts BOOKSTORE FOR KID’S TITLES – NATIONAL 1. Barnes & Noble 2. Amazon 3. Target

SHOPPING BABY GEAR & CLOTHING – LOCAL 1. Here WEE Grow Again 2. Whimsies 3. Shenanigans (pg 34) BABY GEAR & CLOTHING – NATIONAL 1. Target 2. Old Navy 3. Belk BIKE SHOP 1. Blue Ridge Cyclery 2. Blue Wheel Bicycles 3. Crozet Bicycle Shop (pg 12)

LOCAL CUSTOM FRAME SHOP 1. The Great Frame Up 2. Creative Framing & The Art Box 3. FastFrame FARMERS MARKET LOCATION 1. Charlottesville City Market 2. Forest Lakes Farmers Market 3. Crozet Farmers Market GROCERY STORE – LOCAL 1. Foods of All Nations 2. Reid Super-Save Market 2. Crozet Great Valu 3. Feast! (pg 37) 3. Rebecca’s Natural Foods (pg 10)

SWETT DENTISTRY CharlottesvilleFamily Favorite Award Winner

2020

GROCERY STORE – NATIONAL 1. Wegmans 2. Trader Joe’s 3. Whole Foods HOBBY SHOP 1. End Game Center 2. Michaels Arts & Crafts 2. JO-ANN Fabrics & Crafts 3. GameStop JEWELRY BOUTIQUE 1. Andrew Minton Jewelers 2. Schwarzschild Keller & George Jewelers 3. Tuel Jewelers KITCHEN GEAR & SUPPLIES – LOCAL 1. The Happy Cook 2. Found Market Co. 3. Be Just Domestic Tools & Home Supplies KITCHEN GEAR & SUPPLIES – NATIONAL 1. Bed Bath & Beyond 2. HomeGoods 3. Williams-Sonoma

We serve Artisan pizzas, calzones, subs & paninis (filled with flavor from our wood fired oven) as well as Italian and American pastas, beer, wine & desserts. Regular & wheat pizza dough are made fresh daily and hand tossed to create a masterpiece for you!

E-Gift Certificates Curb-side Pick Up Dine In

Local Delivery Catering

Gluten-free, dairy-free and vegan options available.

Dr. David Swett

Dr. Rebecca Swett

CharlottesvilleFamily Favorite Award Winner

2020

N N N N N I have complete faith in the excellent quality ... — D. S.

I have complete faith in the excellent quality of care and complete trust in this dental practice.

I don’t know if it’s possible to find better care anywhere. I enthusiastically recommend them without reservations.

N N N N N Polished, Professional & Positive — D W. Unlike most people who dread going to the dentist, I love being treated by David & Rebecca and their polished, professional, positive crew! They are tops in my book because I know my family and I will receive the utmost in dental care.

Caring for you like family.

900 Rio E Court, Suite B, Charlottesville | swettdentistry.com | 434.979.3940

40

Holiday 2020

TheBrickOvenVA.com | 434-964-1119 1966 Rio Hill Center, Charlottesville

MATERNITY CLOTHING – LOCAL 1. Kid to Kid 2. Here WEE Grow Again 3. Green Bean Baby Boutique

PLACE TO BUY GREEN 1. Whole Foods 2. Rebecca’s Natural Foods (pg 10) 3. Integral Yoga Natural Foods

MATERNITY CLOTHING – NATIONAL 1. Target 2. Old Navy 3. Walmart

PLACE TO BUY JEANS 1. Madewell 2. Old Navy 3. American Eagle

MUSIC STORE 1. Stacy’s Music Shop 2. Plan 9 Music 3. Music & Arts

RESALE/CONSIGNMENT FOR KIDS – LOCAL 1. Here WEE Grow Again 2. Natalie Dressed 3. Schoolhouse Thrift Shop

PET SUPPLIES – LOCAL 1. Pet Supplies Plus 2. Pet Food Discounters 3. Crate & Marrow PET SUPPLIES – NATIONAL 1. PetSmart 2. Petco 3. Tractor Supply

RESALE/CONSIGNMENT FOR KIDS – NATIONAL 1. Kid to Kid 2. Plato’s Closet RESALE/CONSIGNMENT FOR WOMEN 1. Twice is Nice (T1N1) 2. Natalie Dressed 3. Darling Boutique

SPORTING GOODS – LOCAL 1. Ragged Mountain Running Shop 2. Play It Again Sports 3. Albemarle Angler 3. Freestyle SPORTING GOODS – NATIONAL 1. Dick’s Sporting Goods 2. L.L. Bean 3. Great Outdoor Provision Company TOY SHOP – LOCAL 1. Shenanigans (pg 34) 2. Alakazam Toys & Gifts 3. Whimsies 3. End Game Center WOMEN’S CLOTHING SHOP – LOCAL 1. Eloise Clothing Boutique 2. Scarpa 3. Bittersweet Boutique WOMEN’S CLOTHING – NATIONAL 1. Belk 2. Anthropology 3. Lululemon

CharlottesvilleFamily Favorite Award Winner

2020

CharlottesvilleFamily.com

41

{inspiration family favorites} HEALTH & WELLNESS ALTERNATIVE CARE PROVIDER 1. Therapy 360 CHIROPRACTOR 1. Cox Chiropractic Clinic 1. Heppner Family Chiropractic & Wellness (pg 45) 2. Scott Wagner 3. Airrosti

CharlottesvilleFamily

COUNSELING SERVICE 1. Region Ten 1. Riverbend Counseling Group 1. The Father Connection

Favorite Award Winner

2020

• Gymnastics, dance & yoga for children ages 1-13 • 50+ years of combined instructor experience • Beginner through advanced grade school gymnastics • Toddler Classes in both dance & gymnastics

• Birthday parties • Open gym • Early morning open gym with coffee & pastries • Parents Night Out the first Saturday of every month • Special holiday events & workshops

GryphonGymnastics.com • GryphonGymnastics@gmail.com

1713 ALLIED STREET, SUITE 1 • CHARLOTTESVILLE • 434.284.7364

In Person & onlIne TuTorIng 1-on-1 and TesT PreP Classes SAT I & II ACT SSAT/HSPT ALL LEVELS OF MATH

ALL SCIENCES ENGLISH HISTORY

AP EXAMS LANGUAGES AND MORE

DENTIST, FAMILY PRACTICE 1. Swett Dentistry (pg 40) 2. Crozet Family Dental (pg 49) 3. Aesthetic Dentistry of Charlottesville (pg 43) DENTIST, PEDIATRIC SPECIALTY 1. Charlottesville Pediatric Dentistry 2. Bitesize Pediatric & Teen Dentistry (pg 44) 3. Piedmont Pediatric Dentistry (pg 15) 3. Crozet Pediatric Dentistry DERMATOLOGIST 1. Charlottesville Dermatology 2. Albemarle Dermatology 3. Dermatology PLC FAMILY MEDICINE PRACTICE 1. Pantops Family Medicine 2. Downtown Family Health Care 3. Charlottesville Family Medicine HOSPITAL FOR CHILDREN’S HEALTH 1. UVA Children’s Hospital 2. Sentara Martha Jefferson Hospital 3. Augusta Health

CharlottesvilleFamily

Thank you for Voting Georgetown Learning Centers a Top Education Center!

Contact us today!

Amber-Johnson@glclearn.com glclearn.com | 434.296.5111 42

Holiday 2020

Favorite Award Winner

2020

HOSPITALITY FOR MATERNITY CARE 1. Sentara Martha Jefferson Hospital 2. UVA Children’s Hospital 3. Augusta Health OBSTETRICS & GYNECOLOGY 1. Jefferson Obstetrics & Gynecology 2. UVA Women’s Health 3. Dr. Edward Wolanski Gynecology 3. Center for Advanced Gynecology (pg 41)

OPTOMETRIST 1. MyEyeDr. 2. Crozet Eye Care, Optometrists 2. Blue Ridge Ophthalmology 3. Primary Eyecare ORTHODONTIST 1. Charlottesville Orthodontics (pg 3) 2. Mill Creek Orthodontics (pg 39) 3. Hamer & Glassick Orthodontics (pg 47) PEDIATRICIAN 1. Pediatric Associates of Charlottesville (pg 5) 2. Piedmont Pediatrics (pgs 10 & 65) 3. Northridge Pediatrics at UVA PHYSICAL THERAPY 1. Spectrum Physical Therapy 2. ACAC 3. Move Better Physical Therapy PLASTIC SURGEON 1. UVA Plastic Surgery 2. The Center for Plastic Surgery at Sentara Martha Jefferson

EDUCATION NANNY/SITTER SERVICE 1. Local Nanny Network, LLC 2. Monticello Nannies

LIBRARY BRANCH 1. Northside Library 2. Crozet Library 3. Gordon Avenue Library

DAYCARE – FULL-TIME INFANT CARE 1. Bright Beginnings Preschool (pg 25) 2. Gentle Care Daycare 2. Bright Eyes Community Childcare Center 3. Foundations Child Development Center 3. Playful Learners Preschool (pg 27)

PRESCHOOL 1. North Branch School (pg 14) 2. Peabody School (pg 10) 3. First Baptist Preschool 3. The International School of Charlottesville (pg 70)

EDUCATIONAL CONSULTANT/ TUTORING PROGRAM/LEARNING PROGRAM 1. Clayborne Education 2. LearningRx 3. Georgetown Learning Centers (pg 42)

PRIVATE SCHOOL – ELEMENTARY 1. North Branch School (pg 14) 1. St. Anne’s-Belfield School (pg 71) 2. The Covenant School (pg 67) 3. Peabody School (pg 10) 3. Regents School of Charlottesville (pg 46) 3. Free Union Country School

EDUCATIONAL RECREATION 1. Living Earth School 2. Alliance Francaise de Charlottesville 3. Han Studio

PRIVATE SCHOOL – MIDDLE SCHOOL 1. The Covenant School (pg 67) 2. North Branch School (pg 14) 3. St. Anne’s-Belfield School (pg 71) 3. Peabody School (pg 10)

Personalizing Dentistry One Smile at a Time!

CharlottesvilleFamily Favorite Award Winner

2020

Dr. Anita M. Neel • Dr. Heba Al Tamimi

cvillesmiles.com 900 Gardens Blvd #600 • Charlottesville, Virginia 22901 • 434-984-3455 admin2@cvillesmiles.com CharlottesvilleFamily.com

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{inspiration family favorites} PRIVATE SCHOOL – HIGH SCHOOL & COLLEGE PREP 1. The Covenant School (pg 67) 2. St. Anne’s-Belfield School (pg 71) 3. Tandem Friends School (pg 9) SPECIAL NEEDS EDUCATION 1. Oakland School 2. VIA (Virginia Institute of Autism) SPEECH-LANGUAGE PROGRAM 1. Crozet Speech & Learning Center 2. UVA’s Speech-Language-Hearing Center (Sheila C Johnson Center) 3. Small Talk Speech & Therapy Center PRESCHOOL TEACHER 1. Susan Butler – North Branch School (pg 14) 2. Jenny Strong – Peabody School (pg 10) 3. Jeanine Bieber – North Branch School (pg 14) ELEMENTARY SCHOOL TEACHER 1. Robin Fox – Peabody School (pg 10) 2. Jen Tal – North Branch School (pg 14) 3. April Erksin – North Branch School (pg 14) MIDDLE SCHOOL TEACHER 1. Katrien Vance – North Branch School (pg 14) 2. Jody Taylor – Sutherland Middle School 3. Kristopher Chain – Peabody School (pg 10)

“For a Lifetime of Smiles” Dr. Bobby Lunka, DDS, MSD Pediatric Specialist Dr. Kathyrn A. Cook, DDS Pediatric Specialist

Thank you for voting for us!

CharlottesvilleFamily Favorite Award Winner

2020

bitesizedentistrycville.com 895-B Rio East Court, Suite B, Charlottesville Call 434-817-KIDS (5437) 44

Holiday 2020

HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER 1. David Hare, AHS 2. Will Cooke, CHS 3. Christopher Cantone, AHS 3. Adam Mulcahy, WAHS

DINING OUT BREAKFAST SPOT – LOCAL 1. Bodo’s Bagels 2. Tip Top Restaurant 3. MarieBette Café & Bakery BREAKFAST SPOT – NATIONAL 1. First Watch 2. International House of Pancakes (IHOP) 3. Panera

BUFFET RESTAURANT – LOCAL 1. Milan Indian Cuisine 2. Himalayan Fusion 3. Hibachi Grill & Supreme Buffet

DATE NIGHT RESTAURANT – NATIONAL 1. Burtons Grill & Bar 2. Texas Roadhouse 3. Bonefish Grill

FAST FOOD – LOCAL 1. Bodo’s Bagels 2. Sticks Kebob Shop 3. Brazos Tacos

BUFFET RESTAURANT – NATIONAL 1. Wood Grill Buffet 2. Sushi King 3. Golden Corral

FROZEN DESSERT PLACE – LOCAL 1. Chap’s Ice Cream 2. Crozet Creamery 3. Kirt’s Homemade Ice Cream

FAST FOOD – NATIONAL 1. Chick-fil-A 2. Panera Bread 3. Chipotle Mexican Grill

COFFEE SHOP – LOCAL 1. Grit Coffee 2. Shenandoah Joe’s 3. Mudhouse Coffee Roasters 3. Greenberry’s

FROZEN DESSERT PLACE – NATIONAL 1. Ben & Jerry’s Ice Cream (pg 27) 2. Kilwin’s 3. Kohr Brothers

HAMBURGER RESTAURANT – LOCAL 1. Riverside Lunch 2. Citizen Burger Bar 3. Martin’s Grill

FAMILY RESTAURANT – LOCAL 1. Tip Top Restaurant 2. Sticks Kebob Shop 2. Timberwood Grill 3. Riverside

HAMBURGER RESTAURANT – NATIONAL 1. Five Guys 2. Burger Bach 3. Burton’s Grill & Bar

COFFEE SHOP – NATIONAL 1. Starbucks 2. Panera Bread 3. Dunkin’ Donuts DATE NIGHT RESTAURANT – LOCAL 1. Tavola 2. Vivace 3. Mas Tapas 3. Aberdeen Barn (pg 29)

FAMILY RESTAURANT – NATIONAL 1. Texas Roadhouse 2. Burton’s Grill & Bar 3. Bonefish Grill

INTERNATIONAL FOOD – CHINESE 1. Peter Chang’s China Grill 2. Taste of China 3. The Red Lantern

Voted Charlottesville’s Favorite Chiropractor 2009 - 2020 2 0 1 4

Charlottesville W

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Dr. Michelle Heppner

2020

Maternity Care Pediatric Services Low Back/Neck Pain Massage Therapy Sports Injury, Prevention & Treatment

WE’VE MOVED!

Our new location is 1544 Insurance Lane in Charlottesville!

heppnerfamilychiropractic.com WE ARE OPEN! • 1544 Insurance Lane, Charlottesville • 424-974-7955 CharlottesvilleFamily.com

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{inspiration family favorites} INTERNATIONAL FOOD – INDIAN 1. Milan Indian Cuisine 2. Kanak Indian Kitchen 3. Maharaja Fine Indian Cuisine INTERNATIONAL FOOD – ITALIAN/ MEDITERRANEAN 1. Tavola 2. Vivace 3. Sultan Kebab

CharlottesvilleFamily Favorite Award Winner

2020

INTERNATIONAL FOOD – SOUTH OF THE BORDER 1. Guadalajara (pg 46) 2. Plaza Azteca 3. El Jaripeo 3. The Bebedero 3. Taco Gomez

A ClAssiCAl ChristiAn sChool • GrAdes K-12 Challenging Academics • Biblical Worldview Affordable Tuition • Small Class Sizes • Team Sports

Call to Schedule a Tour (434) 293-0633 • regents-school.org

Voted Best South of the Border Restaurant!

CharlottesvilleFamily Favorite Award Winner

2020

INTERNATIONAL FOOD – TAPAS 1. Mas Tapas 2. Bang!

3. The Bebedero INTERNATIONAL FOOD – THAI 1. Thai ’99 Restaurant & Bar (pg 48) 2. Lime Leaf Thai Restaurant 3. Monsoon Siam (pg 31) 3. Chimm – Thai & Southeast Asian Restaurant LOCAL KID’S MENU 1. Bodo’s Bagels 2. Chimm – Thai Southeast Asian Restaurant 3. Smoked NATIONAL KID’S MENU 1. Burtons Grill & Bar 2. Chick-fil-A 3. Outback Steakhouse

Locally Family-Owned & Operated since 1988 Four Locations!

29 North 395 Greenbrier Dr | 434-978-4313 UVA Area 2206 Fontaine Ave | 434-979-2424 Downtown 806 East Market St | 434-977-2676 Pantops 108 Town Country Ln | 434-293-3538

GuadalajaraMexicanVa.com

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PIZZA – LOCAL 1. Christian’s Pizza 2. Dr. Ho’s Humble Pie 3. Lampo Neapolitan Pizzeria 3. The Brick Oven (pg 40) PIZZA – NATIONAL 1. Domino’s 2. Mellow Mushroom 3. Papa John’s

SALAD BAR 1. Whole Foods 2. Chopt Creative Salad Co. 3. Roots Natural Kitchen

KID’S ACTIVITIES BABY/TODDLER PROGRAM 1. Blue Ridge Music Together (pg 25) 2. Piedmont Family YMCA (pg 70) 3. ACAC

SANDWICH – LOCAL 1. Bodo’s Bagels 2. Take It Away Sandwich Shop 3. Bellair Market 3. Ivy Provisions

DANCE SCHOOL 1. Charlottesville Ballet Academy 2. Albemarle Ballet Theatre 3. Charlottesville Performing Arts School

SANDWICH – NATIONAL 1. Jersey Mike’s Subs 2. Panera Bread 3. Subway

GOLF COURSE 1. The First Tee of the Virginia Blue Ridge 2. Birdwood Golf Course 3. Old Trail Golf Club

SWEETS & TREATS – LOCAL 1. MarieBette Café & Bakery 2. Gearharts Fine Chocolates 2. Albemarle Baking Company 3. Chandler’s Bakery 3. The Pie Chest

GYMNASTICS PROGRAM 1. Classics Gymnastics 2. Friendship Gymnastics Center 3. Gryphon Gymnastics (pg 42) HORSEBACK RIDING LESSONS 1. Camp Friendship (pg 61) 2. The Barracks Farm 3. Carriage Hill Farm 3. Millington Stables

MARTIAL ARTS 1. Mountain Kim Martial Arts 2. Laughing Dragon Kung Fu 3. Charlottesville Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu Academy 3. Gracie Charlottesville MUSIC TEACHER/SCHOOL 1. The Front Porch 2. Music Resource Center 3. Stacy’s Music Shop 3. Blue Ridge Music Together (pg 25) TEAM SPORTS PROGRAM 1. SOCA (pg 12) 2. Albemarle County Parks & Recreation 2. Charlottesville Parks & Recreation 3. McIntire Little League 3. VABA 3. Piedmont Family YMCA (pg 70) TENNIS LESSONS 1. Boar’s Head Sports Club 2. Farmington Country Club 3. ACAC

CharlottesvilleFamily.com

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{inspiration family favorites} THEATRE PROGRAM 1. Live Arts 2. Four County Players 3. Black Box Players

BARBER SHOP 1. Barber House Barber Shop 2. Chung’s Barber Shop 3. Belmont Barber Shop

SUMMER DAY CAMP 1. Living Earth School 2. Triple C Camp 3. Piedmont Family YMCA (pg 70)

EXERCISE CLASS – MOMMY & ME 1. One Fit Mother 2. ACAC 3. Crossroads Gymnastics Center 3. Katie Spangler Bond Boot Camp

SUMMER RESIDENTIAL CAMP 1. Living Earth School 2. Camp Friendship (pg 61) 3. Camp Greenbrier SWIM PROGRAM 1. ACAC 2. Boar’s Head Sports Club 3. Greene Hills Club

FITNESS & BEAUTY BEAUTY SALON 1. Moxie Hair & Body Lounge 2. Anew Salon 3. Bristles Hair Design & Day Spa 3. Bubbles

EXERCISE CLASS – WOMEN 1. Anytime Fitness 2. One Fit Mother 3. FlyDog Yoga FAMILY HEALTH CLUB/GYM 1. ACAC 2. Anytime Fitness 3. Piedmont Family YMCA (pg 70) KID’S HAIRCUTS 1. Barber House Barber Shop 1. Hair Cuttery 2. Elemental Holistic Hair 2. Chung’s Barber Shop 2. Hazel Beauty Bar

MANICURE/PEDICURE 1. Nails Design 1. Red Handed Nails Salon & Spa 2. Holly’s Nails Salon 2. Perfection Nails 3. Serenity Nails & Spa MIND/BODY CLASSES 1. Anytime Fitness 1. FlyDog Yoga 2. ACAC PLACE FOR A MASSAGE 1. ACAC 2. Massage Envy (pg 27) 3. Hand and Stone Massage & Facial Spa 3. Halo Salt Spa SPA 1. Silver Lining Day Spa 2. Halo Salt Spa 3. Oasis Day Spa & Body Shop YOGA STUDIO 1. FlyDog Yoga 2. Hot Yoga Charlottesville 3. Santosha Yoga

Located at 915 GARDENS BLVD behind CRUTCHFIELD in ALBEMARLE SQUARE

Open 7 days a week Affordable fine dining Carry-out and delivery available 434.964.1212 • thai99usa.com

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COMING IN THE NEXT ISSUE

CharlottesvilleFamily Favorite Award Winner

2020

Thank you for voting us a winner 7 years in a row!

2014-2020

CharlottesvilleFamily Favorite Awards Award Favorite Winner 2019

Dr. James Willis • Dr. Emery Taylor • Dr. Amanda Magid • Dr. Marissa DeAngelis

2020

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{resources pets}

READY FOR A PET? Choosing the Best One for Your Family “Can we get a puppy? Can we get a kitty? A rabbit? Please!”

If you’re a parent, you have probably heard these questions on several occasions. Surrounded by media, visiting friends who have pets and even meeting pets in the neighborhood, your child will more than likely fall head over heels and want one of her own. But how do you decide which pet is best for your family and lifestyle? Should you get the talkative Siamese cat, adopt a happy-go-lucky Golden Retriever or take an entirely different route and go with exotic fish or iguana? Here are some simple tips to help you choose the perfect addition to your family.

Finding the Activity That’s Right for You

by Amanda Mews

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What sort of pet are you each looking for? Are you looking for a hiking buddy or a couch potato?

When deciding to add a pet to the family, one of the first things you should do is sit down and talk about it as a family.

What sort of pet are you each looking for?

Are you looking for a hiking buddy or a couch potato? Look at what your life could be like in a month, in a year. Do you still think having a pet could fit in well with your schedules and needs?

Adding a pet to the family can be overwhelming. It helps to sit down and look at both your current and future lifestyle and plans and then decide on guidelines to keep from getting overwhelmed.

Another thing to consider, especially with young children, is who will be responsible for taking care of the animal.

Will your children participate in the animal’s care, such as brushing, walking, feeding and playtime, or will it mostly fall on the adults to do so? A pet is a great way to teach responsibility, but keep in mind that even with the best planning and organization, adults will have to participate as well.

How Much?

Affordability is a major consideration when choosing a pet—one that a child may not fully grasp. Any pet will need routine veterinary care, grooming and, of course, the essentials like food, flea collars, treats and toys. Some pets, such as reptiles and some small animals, need a special veterinarian who is experienced in treating those types of animals. Also, depending on the type of pet you get, different diets can range from fairly cheap to fairly expensive, especially if your pet ends up needing to be on a special diet for health reasons.

You may want to have your children ask close friends and neighbors about their pet expenses as part of their research into choosing and caring for a pet.

CharlottesvilleFamily.com

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{resources pets} Not Ready to Commit?

Try fostering an animal!

If you’re still not sure about expanding your family, then try fostering! Fostering an animal—whether it be for a week or two, to help give an animal some time away from the shelter, or to consider a more long-term situation—can do wonders for dogs and cats waiting for their forever homes. Not only do you give an animal a much-needed reprieve from the shelter, but your children can find out just how much work goes into taking care of a pet.

Fostering a shelter animal can help kids learn responsibility through taking care of an animal, and they can even watch puppies and kittens grow up.

The Charlottesville-Albemarle SPCA also provides excellent resources to foster families. You will receive training, supplies and all of the guidance you may need when caring for your temporary pet. Also, any supplies, such as toys or treats, that you buy for your foster pet may be tax deductible.

If you think fostering would be a good fit for your family, fill out a foster application at caspca.org or in person at the shelter. For more information, contact the Charlottesville-Albemarle SPCA at 434973-5959.

When my family and I were shopping around for a vet for our pup, we came across several veterinary practices in the Charlottesville area that offer so-called wellness plans, which cover things like vaccines, lab work and dental cleaning, and which offer discounts on services that aren’t covered. Pet insurance, recommended by many vets, can cover emergencies and other procedures, such as x-rays that are

PET GUIDE

not covered by wellness plans. You can find information about these plans online or at your veterinarian’s office.

It also helps to know national trends.

According to the American Veterinary Medical Association (AVMA), dog owners can spend an average of $400 per year per animal, whereas cat owners spend roughly half that amount.

Charlottesville Albemarle SPCA See ad page 53

Which Buyer?

Once you’ve decided what type of pet you want, you need to determine how you will get your pet. You may decide that you want a purebred pet. In that case, take time to research breeders or pet stores

Georgetown Veterinary Hospital See ad page 57

before settling on one. Some pet stores use backyard breeders when acquiring animals, so make sure you do your homework on this. You may also want to look into rescues that only take in certain breeds. And of course, you can always contact one of the local animal shelters, which have many pets, both purebreds and mixed breeds, in need of loving homes.

A big plus in buying from a breeder is that you know the animal’s history.

You can meet the parents of the pet you are considering and observe their temperaments. The breeder may also do certain tests to see if there’s a possibility your animal will develop health problems, such as hip dysplasia or cancer, later on in life. You also may receive papers to register your purebred with an association, such as the American Kennel Club. However, buying a pet from a breeder can be very expensive, with some dogs costing more than $1,000.

Adopting from a shelter or a rescue organization has both pros and cons.

For starters, when you adopt from a reputable rescue or a shelter like the Charlottesville-Albemarle SPCA, the staff

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will make sure you are getting the pet that is best suited to your family and

Which Animal?

and German Shepherds, are not accepted

Now, which pet do you choose?

in many apartments or rental homes

require

According to the AVMA, dogs have become

due to being deemed uninsurable; this

you fill out an application to identify

more popular than cats: U.S. households

restriction applies to mixed breed dogs,

whether you have a fenced-in yard, small

are home to 48 million dogs and 31

too.

children, a current veterinarian and so

million cats. However, fewer families have

Cats are known for having strong

on.

cats than dogs, because cat owners are

personalities. Some love to cuddle, but

likely to have two or more cats.

others are aloof. In either case, they are

lifestyle.

At

Many

the

organizations

Charlottesville-Albemarle

SPCA, it’s called a matchmaker form.

After reviewing this form, the staff can

Most dogs are affectionate and playful.

choose which animals they think would

If you are looking for a low-maintenance

independent

be best suited to you. You can meet the

pet, you may want to avoid longhaired

require less maintenance than dogs,

animal, learn of their background and

breeds. Another thing to consider with

but they still require routine vet visits,

even bring your children and any current

dogs is that they will require training,

grooming, food and even toys. Cats can

pets to meet the suggested animals. You

which can be expensive. A few local

also be destructive, particularly when

may even have a home visit, where a

businesses offer training programs, which

they feel the need to scratch, which

staff member comes to see how suitable

add to the cost of acquiring your pet but

unfortunately can wreak havoc on your

your setting is for the animal. Animals

are great investments. Crate training is

furniture, curtains and carpets. It’s best to

adopted from a shelter or rescue center

increasingly popular, especially if you find

invest in a scratching post or scratch pad

are already spayed or neutered and up-to-

your dog is anxious being home alone.

for your cat to keep them from shredding

date on all vaccinations; some even have

According to the Humane Society of the

your sofa.

a microchip for identification already

United States, dogs love crates the way

implanted. While you may never know

their ancestors loved dens.

the full history of your pet, you’ll certainly participate in a thorough vetting process.

perfect for families who want a more animal.

Cats

generally

Small animals like rabbits, ferrets and guinea pigs are also another excellent

you’re

option. Fish—especially popular after

planning on moving or you currently rent

Pixar’s “Nemo” came out—give hours of

your home, because some breeds, such

watching pleasure. You may even decide

as Pit Bull Terriers, Doberman Pinschers

that a reptile or an amphibian, such as

Be

mindful,

especially

if

cont’d on pg 57

CharlottesvilleFamily.com

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{resources pets}

’s e l b Bum Picture Perfect Pet Contest Sponsored by

WI

!

R E NN

{resources pets}

a turtle or a snake, would be the right

could be kept in charge of walking a dog,

fit for their family. Ashley, a mother in

cleaning out the litter box or putting new

Scottsville who owns a gecko, says, “We

bedding down in a cage.

got him because he’s different than

Caring for and being responsible for

our other pets. He’s definitely a lot less

a pet are not to be taken lightly, yet pet

maintenance than our dogs.” Keep in

ownership is one of the best bonding

mind that some veterinarians do not have

experiences for families, no matter which

experience with small or exotic animals,

pet you decide to acquire. Regardless of

so the cost of veterinary care may be

whether you choose a mixed breed dog

higher than if you owned a dog or a cat.

from the shelter, a Siamese cat from a breeder or even a parakeet from the

Whose Responsibility?

Have you already started discussing whether you’ll get a ferret, a dog or a

pet store, a pet can bring enrichment, happiness and years of fun to children of all ages.

cat? More than likely, your children have probably already promised to take care of their newfound friend. But, exactly how they can help in their pet’s care varies based on their ages. For example, great chores for a preschooler would be brushing the pet, picking up toys or filling the water bowl. A 5- or 6-year-old would be able to fill food bowls with supervision (note that some pets can be aggressive around food), help with baths and help clean crates and cages. An older child

Amanda grew up surrounded by animals of all shapes and sizes and is currently a proud parent, foster mom and advocate for the Pit Bull breed.

{resources parenting}

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Teen Jobs

& Autism How to Provide Job Support for Your Autistic Teen

by Dana Reinhardt

All of us remember our first job. No matter whether it was helping out with the family business, serving sweet treats at the local frozen yogurt shop, mowing lawns or working at a summer camp, it was an experience that, for better or for worse, you’ll always remember.

CharlottesvilleFamily.com

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{resources parenting}

While first jobs rarely launch your career, they are an important step to establishing yourself in the workplace.

They are an opportunity to practice working as part of a team, taking responsibility, conducting oneself professionally and interacting with customers. All teens should have access to these valuable experiences.

For parents of teens with autism, the job search can be a daunting idea. Gaps in education, awareness and inclusion continue to persist in the workplace regarding individuals with autism and have resulted in high unemployment for them. According to Autism Speaks, nearly half of 25-year-olds with autism have never held a paying job.

So, here are a few tips as you consider job opportunities for your teen, help them navigate the interview process and equip them to succeed once they’ve landed the job.

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Set Clear Expectations for The Job Hunt Process It’s important to have mutual guidelines and parameters you and your teen can agree on upfront before diving into the job search. For example, how many hours is your teen willing and able to work, given other commitments?

Will they need help with transportation?

What kind of environment will be most conducive to success? Consider lighting, noise level, potential for crowds, etc. that could be sensory triggers. This will help focus your search and ensure that you invest time in finding a job that’s going to be a true fit for both your teen’s needs and your family’s needs.

Consider Their Strengths & Interests When people picture individuals with autism in the workplace, they may picture jobs that are routine-based and

entry level. While jobs like this may be an excellent fit for some individuals with autism—especially in the summer when the learning curve can be steep and fast—individuals with autism are a diverse group. Like all teens looking for a job, individuals with autism have a wide range of strengths that can be valuable in a variety of settings, whether that’s an excellent memory, attention to detail, analytical abilities or highlevel math skills. The list goes on and on. It’s important to emphasize and encourage these strengths in your teen and to explore opportunities for them to leverage and build on those skills.

At the same time, it’s important to encourage your teen to think about their interests and passions. Some teens with autism may find themselves limited by the box in which society has placed them.

But as with any young adult, taking a job that they are excited about can be more

fulfilling, can encourage creativity and can inspire them to dream big and take ownership of their future.

Play Out Several Mock Interview Scenarios In anticipation of the unpredictable nature of interviews, run a few different scenarios with a list of questions so that you can talk through potential responses with your teen and prepare them for the uncertainty. This allows them the opportunity to work through those challenges in an environment where they feel safe and comfortable and with someone they know and trust. It can even be helpful to ask another friend or family member to conduct one of the mock scenarios so they can practice with different interview styles and generalize their skills.

Provide A Toolkit for SelfAdvocacy As your teen explores job opportunities, it’s important to be both realistic and supportive. We know all

too well the harsh realities of the world and how cruel people can be. There’s a possibility your teen will face disrespect, discrimination and rejection along the way. Consider how you can equip your teen to face those circumstances when they arise, whether it’s during the hiring process or once they’ve landed the job.

This can include educating them about the types of interview questions that employers legally should or shouldn’t be asking as well as sharing ideas for how they can message their strengths and skills.

Look for Community Education Opportunities

also for other individuals with autism.

Remember that while individuals with autism certainly ace a unique set of challenges, rejection is a universal feeling. You can remind your teen that they are not alone by sharing stories of individuals with all types of backgrounds who faced rejections before they find success.

As parents, though we want to protect our kids from facing hurt and rejection, we need to give them the opportunity to explore their independence. And as a community, it’s important that we continue to advocate for inclusive hiring practices and workplace policies for our children and future generations.

See the process as an opportunity to advocate for your son or daughter while you educate your community in the process. Take time throughout the year to reach out to a few businesses in your community to see if they would be interested in inclusion training or a workshop. This can be a unique way to raise awareness and create more opportunities not only for your teen but

Dana is the education director of HASA, a Baltimore nonprofit that provides health, speech-language, education, language access and inclusion programs to people of all ages. She also oversees Gateway School, a nonpublic school for children with autism and other communication-related disorders.

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{inspiration parenting}

by Melissa Face

P

Fo

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PRETEND PLAY

ostering Your Child’s Creative Spirit

by Melissa Face

“I want to be a cat for Halloween,” my daughter, Delaney, announced. My husband and I had no problem honoring her request. After all, Delaney has portrayed a cat for the past four years of her life—longer than some adults stick with their career choices.

I remember feeling embarrassed when she first assumed her feline role.

She often sported cat ears and a tail when we went shopping. She posed like a cat on stage at her dance recital, and she hissed and snarled in family pictures. She even crouched down in the corner of the living room to eat her snack. And for an entire year, she meowed to her before-care teachers when I dropped her off at school.

Despite my initial embarrassment, I have encouraged both of my children to engage in pretend play. They save their Halloween costumes to use throughout the year, and they regularly pretend to be restaurant employees, teachers and veterinarians. I’ve been beginning to wonder, though, if I have allowed them to take pretend play too far. After all, I am now recognized in my community as the mom of the cat girl.

Benefits of Pretend Play Around the age of 18 months, imaginative play becomes visible in children when they imitate activities like talking on toy phones or feeding dolls. As they grow older, they may pretend that a bathtub is a boat or that the living room floor is the deep, blue ocean. And while it can look as though they are simply playing, this engagement of curiosity and sense of wonderment helps them develop language and social connections.

Kathy Carpenter, the Director of PreSchool Programs at St. Anne’s-Belfield School, is currently serving as the Director of the Play Project. The project consists of a consortium of educators who advocate for programming that supports authentic learning through play.

From her perspective, the benefits of pretend play are clear and numerous.

Whether it’s caring for a doll or stuffed animal, or making “cakes” in sand boxes, children are learning as they play and try on new roles and ideas. “Children learn directly about cause and effect; they learn how to work together to build a fort or plan out creative meals at a restaurant for example,” says Carpenter. “They wonder why, and they

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ask questions. Through all of this ‘work’, their language is developing, their social connections are building and their senses are awakened, contributing to the development of creative, empathetic and confident children.”

Are There Any Drawbacks to Pretend Play?

When children engage in pretend play, it’s quite common for them to play cops and robbers or some other form of “good guys” and “bad guys.” If the children begin hitting each other, or if the play becomes violent in any way, it’s time for an adult to intervene. Additionally, adults should pay attention to a child who might be acting out fears related to a trauma through pretend play. At this point, it is best to notify a caregiver so the situation can be addressed with a professional.

What about when a child asks a restaurant server for an additional menu for his “friend” seated next to him? While that can certainly be an awkward parenting moment, imaginary friends are very common. Some children create imaginary friendships as a means of coping with loss or loneliness. The famous Neil Diamond tune “Shilo” is an autobiographical song about the artist’s desire for companionship in a lonely childhood. He wrote, “Shilo, when I was young, I used to call your name. When no one else would come, Shilo you always came, and we’d play.” Statistics show that up to 65 percent of children have an

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imaginary friend by age 7, and it is more common for girls to have imaginary friends than boys.

Robin Albertson-Wren, a pre-school teacher at St. Anne’s-Belfield School, said that while it may be strange for parents, there is really nothing troubling about a child having an imaginary friend.

“Quite often, having an imaginary friend is a way for a child to try on a role or social scenario. On some level, children really do understand their friend is not real, and often, the imaginary friend will disappear quite suddenly from the child’s life when it is no longer needed,” says Albertson-Wren.

It seems that embarrassment suffered by the parent may be the only true hazard of pretend play. In her 30 years of experience working with young children, and through her own personal research, Carpenter has found absolutely no drawback to pretend play. “In fact, research supports that imaginative play is essential to a child’s social and emotional development and overall wellbeing,” she says.

Creativity Through the Years While crawling, meowing and hissing are certainly more socially acceptable behaviors for younger children, educators and early childhood professionals agree that pretend play really shouldn’t stop as children grow older. Unfortunately, though, our society’s emphasis on academics often takes away from these creative opportunities.

Stania Shaw, a vocal instructor and music director at DMR Adventures Performing Arts Academy sees the benefits of engaging the imagination in her daily work. “It builds confidence and interpersonal skills,” says Shaw.

“Students have the opportunity to get to know characters, how they live and what their lives are like. They get to really examine why a character is singing a particular song and where the emotion is coming from.” These experiences teach problem solving, encourage empathy and are invaluable to an individual’s life.

While auditioning for a role through a performing arts program or participating in community theatre are fabulous creative outlets, one doesn’t have to be part of a performance in order to reap the rewards of pretend play and a healthy imagination. In fact, many adults are already engaging in imaginary play and following their sense of adventure by attending costume parties and visiting escape rooms. Adults can continue to develop their own imaginations by reading, journaling, asking questions and attempting to think like a child.

Summer Programs at

Encouraging Pretend Play in Children While experts agree on the many lifelong benefits of imaginative play, Carpenter reminds us that not every child is naturally interested in it. “Just as all children have developmental differences, some children take a while to develop the confidence or interest in pretend play. Typically there is a thought

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{inspiration parenting}

GET TO KNOW

Melissa Face The author of I Love You More Than Coffee, an essay collection for parents who love coffee a lot and their kids (a little) more, Melissa Face shares about her path to becoming an author. You can find more of her writing at melissaface. com as well as where to find her collection.

How did you come up with the name of your collection?

The title actually came from my daughter, Delaney. She was 3 at the time, and she was questioning me about where she ranked in my life. She asked me if I liked her more than candy and cookies. Then, she looked at me very seriously and asked me if I liked her more than coffee. I pretended to be unsure, and then we both laughed. I knew at that moment that she had given me an idea for an essay, as well as the perfect way to package my collection.

Can you tell us a little about your life outside of writing?

Sure! I am mom to Evan, 9, and Delaney, 6, and wife to Craig, but I won’t say his age. And I’m a coffee lover. I’m also an English instructor at the Appomattox Regional Governor’s School for the Arts and Technology in Petersburg. I have the privilege of teaching and working with artists every day, and it’s amazing.

Right now, I’m with them virtually but am hopeful this won’t be for too much longer.

When do you write, and from where do you get inspired?

My kids are definitely my main source of

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inspiration. They are always saying and doing funny things, and my writing is a way to process whatever is happening in my life. It’s also a way for me to celebrate the hilarity of motherhood, which I try to do on a regular basis. If you can pause and take a deep breath between the arguments, spills and chaos, raising kids is freaking hilarious!

I write a lot in the summer. I’ve been on a few writing retreats that were very productive, but I am also able to get a lot done at night and on the weekends. I try not to let it interrupt my family time, but sometimes an idea hits and I fear it will lose some of its magic if I don’t work on it right then.

How does I Love You More Than Coffee differ from other parenting collections?

For starters, it’s not preachy, but there is still a takeaway and something uplifting with each essay. The most unique feature, however, is that the essays are written in real time, beginning with the moment when I discovered I was pregnant with my first child. The reader gets a real picture of my life and parenting mindset at that point in time. What’s funny about that is there is an obvious change in the tone of the essays from extremely optimistic to a little more realistic. But, even the essays at the end are still hopeful, and that reflects my view on parenting and life in general. I’m always hopeful about a new day and another opportunity to be an even better mom.

that if a child by the age of 2 has shown no real interest in pretend play that this is something to mention to a pediatrician just to get an opinion.”

Pretend play can be modeled and encouraged, though. Shaw suggests getting on the floor with a younger child to play and read stories. For older children, a game of charades can get the imaginative juices flowing. Other tips for inspiring pretend play include taking children outside to play, encouraging them to take the lead and providing openended materials for them to use.

For some children, pretend play may lead to a full-blown career or business, but even if it doesn’t, experts agree that the benefits will last for years. My children, Evan and Delaney, have spent the majority of this year engaged in pretend play of various forms.

Evan, 9, is currently working as a bounty hunter most days. He reports to our front yard, and rides his bike to the edge of the woods where he coaxes out

fugitives and brings them to justice. He is so true to character at times that he explains the difference between being a law enforcement officer and a bounty hunter to his dad and me. “I wish people would just do their research,” he says, frustrated. “It’s really not that complicated.”

Meanwhile, 6-year-old Delaney continues displaying feline behaviors.

She hisses and snarls, and occasionally brushes past our legs in hopes of being pet. She eats her daily snacks on top of and under furniture and insists we refer to her as Delaney Cat. My husband and I continue to play along in their imaginary worlds. We realize that the bounty hunter and cat roles will be relatively short, but the benefits of their highly developed imaginations could last a lifetime. Albert Einstein said, “Imagination is everything. It is the preview of life’s coming attractions.” I’m grateful to have a front row seat to this show. *Previously published in Richmond Family Magazine.

Melissa is the author of I Love You More Than Coffee, an essay collection for parents. Her essays and articles have appeared in Richmond Family Magazine, Tidewater Family Magazine and 22 volumes of Chicken Soup for the Soul. Read more at melissaface.com.

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Pre-K through Grade 12 CharlottesvilleFamily.com

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{resources parenting}

raising

resilient kids

9 Tips for Helping Your Kids in These Challenging Times 68

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To say that these past months have been challenging is an understatement. With the pandemic, Black Lives Matter, riots, unemployment, forest fires, the whirl of the election, homeschooling and the isolation from family and friends, it’s no surprise that anxiety and depression are up nationally. Families are grabbling with real uncertainties and adjustments in their everyday lives as well as with the uncertainties of our larger society.

And, our kids are feeling it, too.

Depending on their age, they may be more or less aware of what is actually happening, but even the youngest child is sensitive to any shifts in their family, school and social world. Parents all over are asking the question: “How can I help my kids weather these times?” To help get you started, here are some tips.

Keep Routines Kids love routines. They provide stability in their lives; regularity is the antidote to anxiety. That said, old routines have been disrupted—changes in schooling, parents working at home, no more Wednesday-afternoon play dates. The challenge is to keep as much of what you had before as possible, even the simple consistencies like a bedtime routine. Then, work on building in new routines as quickly as possible, such as weekend virtual chats with grandparents or cousins, Friday night pizza or time spent outdoors.

Expect & Manage Sibling Rivalry We’ve all heard stories about how divorces and even domestic violence have increased since the pandemic.

Everyone is feeling more confined, and the everyday rubbing of lives is understandably getting on your nerves.

While your kids may like having their mom and dad around more, they’ve lost the social outlets they used to have with friends and school.

In the same ways that confinement and isolation can affect adults, it also affects kids. Don’t be surprised if your kids are more irritable, or fighting more about toys or space (the notorious battles over who touched who in the car). But increased sibling rivalry is also a symptom of increased tension in the home that kids feel and react to with each other. Expect it, but rein it in. This is where you want to build individual quiet times into their routines. Here, you want to pay attention to escalating

emotions and either distract or separate them for a short period of time. It’s also good to have a conversation with your kids about solving problems like sharing toys, so they can learn and practice ways of managing their emotional triggers on their own.

Build in Other Sources of Stress Release It is a good time to increase exercise and outside activities as much as possible to help your family burn up all the energy that comes from being cooped up. An idea can be looking up family meditation or yoga exercises you can do with them or all together as a family. They will not only distract your kids from stressors but also help them get centered and relaxed.

Explain What’s Going on in Their Language Even the youngest child is sensitive to what is happening in the bigger world.

They’ve seen images on television, and

by Bob Taibbi

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Family Stress Clinic at UVA The Family Stress Clinic provides counseling services for individuals, couples or families experiencing a variety of difficulties and concerns, including anxiety, depression, child development or behavioral problems, job-related stress and family conflict.

434-243-2916, www.uvahealth.com/ locations/profile/family-stress-clinic Hospice of the Piedmont At no cost, Hospice of the Piedmont provides bereavement support and therapy for children who have been affected by the death of a loved one.

434-817-6900, www.hopva.org Ivy Road Family Solutions Ivy Road Family Solutions is an evidencebased psychotherapy practice that offers a wide range of treatments to individuals, couples, children and adolescents, and families.

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heard you and your partner talking about politics or work. They can sense the negative but don’t know what to emotionally do about it. The danger with children is that because they are naturally self-centered they think the negative is about them in some way, and they can easily become frightened by adults having heated conversations.

Now is a good time to help by giving them the bigger picture of what is happening in the family and the larger world—why grandma can’t come over, why they can’t go to school, etc.

Fortunately, there are also plenty of resources and books available for various ages to help explain some of what is happening around them. It’s important

that older kids and teens are particularly sensitive to, but one-liners like “How have you been feeling,” “Are you worried about x,” “Did you get upset last night when your dad and I were talking or about what you saw on TV” or “Are you missing your friends?”

It is about checking in and seeing how they are doing. Even if you get the shrug or grunt in response, it’s important that you let them know these topics are okay to discuss.

to have those conversations at a level they can understand.

Do Check-Ins Kids only know what is okay to talk about based on what their parents talk about and ask about. This is not the Spanish Inquisition, an interrogation

as sharing too much of your worries with older kids and teens can lead to them feeling responsible for taking care of you. Say how you are feeling, let them know that it is not about them and tell them what you are going to do to help yourself feel better. For instance, “I know I’m feeling cranky. I’m going to go lie down for a few minutes and then I’ll feel better.” You are not only solving a potential problem but also being a good role model.

Broadcast Your Emotions

Build in 1-on-1 Time

In the same vein, you want to let your children know where you are emotionally.

Again, the rationale is the same—kids will make up what they think is going on,

If this isn’t already part of your routine, build in one-on-one time with each child. This is the “floor time” that has been shown to be emotionally helpful for

and because they are kids, they will often get it wrong.

The antidote is to be proactive in letting them know about you. If you’ve had a hard day or are worried about grandma, feel comfortable in saying so, so they know where you are at, too. This is not a license to get into details though,

all ages of kids and even during “normal” times. The ground rules are to set aside a certain time, such as after sister goes to bed a half-hour earlier, where you and your child can spend quality time together. It’s also important that your child can decide how they want to use the time with you, so resist the urge to

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Region Ten Region Ten serves local children and adults dealing with mental health, substance use and/or developmental disabilities. Region Ten accepts Medicaid and sliding scale payments. They also offer free services for those who qualify.

434-972-1800, www.regionten.org UVA Child & Family Psychiatry This UVA facility provides a wide range of services to children and their families, including anxiety, adjustment issues, behavior difficulties, ADHD and other mental health needs.

434-243-6950, www.uvahealth.com/ locations/profile/child-and-family-psychiatry Virginia Center for Family Relations Virginia Center for Family Relations offers counseling services in Charlottesville and Staunton to help people reduce worries and family tension by helping with new ways of thinking.

434-973-5640, www.vcfr.us The Women’s Initiative The Women’s Initiative provides mental health services for women regardless of their ability to pay. They offer counseling, social support and education to deal with life challenges.

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take over or make suggestions.

What is beneficial about this is that your child not only has your undivided attention but also has some control— something they don’t have for most of their day. What often happens is that in these times, your child will open up and talk about things they may not normally share. This is the basis for lots of play therapy that therapists use. It allows the child to feel in control and more relaxed to be open.

Adapt to Your Child’s Personality, Look Ahead You’ve no doubt read stories about how folks are reacting differently to the pandemic. Many introverts are thriving away from the low-level social anxiety they often feel in the office, while extroverts are suffering from the lack of interaction. As a parent, you want to tailor your response to each child’s personality.

Your more introverted daughter may be fine with online schooling, yet your more extroverted son may be emotionally

struggling because he is not physically seeing his friends. So, it’s a great time to see what works and doesn’t work for each child, while also looking ahead.

This too shall pass, and at some point, your introverted daughter will have to step back into former activities and environments. Think now about what she may need to re-enter this norm so it is not so abrupt and disorienting.

Encourage social interaction, even if she is reluctant. And, keep looking ahead to the next year so you are better prepared with helping your kids making yet another transition.

by working together to solve problems as they arise will all greatly impact and guide your children. This is not about stirring guilt or performance pressure but about realizing that how you feel and how you manage these challenges will affect how your kids will ultimately feel and how they, too, will manage their own obstacles.

And if you are struggling, don’t be hesitant to get the support and help you need. You and your partner are the most important people in your child’s life.

Take Care of You If you take nothing else from all these suggestions, take this one: You need to take care of you. You are parents who need to work together as a team. What kids are most sensitive to and what helps them the most is their family environment.

Like it or not, you set the environment.

By taking care of you, by staying calm, by working with your partner to manage your understandable ups and down and

Author of 11 books and more than 300 articles — including the regular “Ask Bob” column in this magazine — Bob has 44 years of experience in couple and family work and is in private practice in Charlottesville (bobtaibbi.com).

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{until next time humorous reflections}

Under the Money Tree

A Dad’s Humorous Tales

by Rick Epstein

When I was a kid, my dad told me this joke that was more a lesson—one that was his subtle way of urging me to be frugal with his money. But I was a poor subject for such a classy approach. Fast-forward 30 years or so and I’m the one hosting the figurative luncheon, with three young guests seated at the table, eyeing the caviar.

But, I’ve found one fiscal policy that sometimes works pretty well: matching funds.

Last year, youngest daughter Wendy, a seventhgrader, wanted to go to camp for three weeks in the summer. That would cost $1,500. Even after feeling around under the couch cushions (at home and wherever I visit), I’m still way short. So I told her, “I’ll pay $1,000 if you pay $500.”

“Where do I get $500?” she asked.

“You earn it,” I said.

“Well, what do you need done?” she asked.

“No,” I said, opening the front door. “The whole point is: The money is not in here; it is out there!” and I gestured out beyond our threshold.

“You’re a seventh-grade girl. Parents would claw The matching-funds each other’s eyes out for a reliable babysitter policy separates the idle your age!” whim from the earnest “But I don’t have any desire. customers,” she said.

“Don’t any of your friends babysit? You could fill in when they’re busy.”

“My friends are always busy.

They’re busy having fun because their parents pay for things and they don’t have to babysit,” she said.

“Listen… You go to a K–8 school,” I replied. “When school lets out and little kids are getting picked up by their parents, find kids who seem nice, hand the mom or dad a homemade business card and say, ‘I’m Wendy Epstein and I’d like to babysit your lovely children.’

Parents will throw themselves at your feet.”

“I can’t do that,” she said, I’d feel like an idiot.”

“Well I’d feel like an idiot if I paid $1,500 to send you to camp, while you’re sitting under a money tree but are unwilling to give it a shake,” I said with feeling.

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Since then, a couple of occasional babysitting clients have found her, and at this writing Wendy owes me $204 for last summer’s camp fun. Wendy, now 14, is thinking about getting a job busing tables at The Greasy Spoon, which is only a block away. But so far, the proprietor has not received her thought-waves and come over to hire her.

Wendy is eager to go to camp again next summer, but eagerness without effort will not win me over.

Wendy is a tough case. The policy worked better with her sister Sally.

When Sally was 12, she wanted to go to camp, and we made the $1,000/$500 deal. Some babysitting income, plus the measly allowance I gave her, turned out to be just enough. Later, she was able to share the price of six weeks of rustic bliss. Then she became a camp counselor, and now her summer luxury is her summer job. Hooray!

Years ago, my oldest daughter, Marie, said, “I wish we had a computer that could edit video.”

After allowing a moment for her fairy godmother to appear and grant the wish, I offered, “Save up half the cost and I’ll give you the rest.” But it had just been an idle thought and she never mentioned it again.

My wife, Betsy, also uses this policy when clothes shopping with the girls. If garments are too expensive or Betsy is afraid the girls won’t actually wear them, she’ll offer to pay half. It’s much more pleasant than a flat “no” and it’s much more affordable than a simple “yes.”

Sometimes the girls accept the offer and sometimes they don’t, but there is never much of a scuffle. And that’s important to a sensitive parent in a public place.

The matching-funds policy separates the idle whim from the earnest desire. It makes the child appreciate not just the desired object, but the effort involved in earning the money, which means some appreciation of Mom and Dad’s contribution, too. And, with the same amount of money, you can make more things happen for your kids.

Would I be making these deals if I had tons of money? No, I’d be giving the kids every blessed thing they asked for. Luckily, I can’t do that.

Rick can be reached at rickepstein@yahoo.com.

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