Hotspots! October 27, 2022 (Issue 3722)

OUTShine Film Festival Fort Lauderdale Opening Party

Photos: JR Davis

Photos: Coco Alarcon

Most Popular Halloween Candy

Halloween is just around the corner, and it's the perfect time for a spooky story about the nation's candy preferences in 2022.

Halloween Candy Trends in the US - In 2020 there was a decrease of 19% in Halloween candy sales. A year later, sales increased by 11% and, according to the data team's projections. This year, sales are forecast to exceed last year's figures by 23%

According to the Most Popular Halloween Candy Report- a study of consumer preferences and trends in America by market research firm Top Data- Americans' favorite candy during this ghostly season is the combination of peanut butter and chocolate, as Reese's was selected as the most popular one in 18 states.

After Reese's, The favorite candy in 18 states including California, Massachusetts and Utah is #2 Kit Kat, and the favorite candy in 10 states including California, New Mexico and Nevada is #3 Skittles / M&M's. The third position is a tie, as both candies were the favorites in 5 states each. including Minnesota, Colorado and Washington.

is what is popular in Florida:

(original)

Methodology - The Top Data team analyzed digital commerce trends during October 2021 and 2022 to determine the most popular Halloween candy in the United States.

To see which are the most popular Halloween candies in every state, go to: topagency.com/report/most-popularhalloween-candy

By Topagency.com/data

Pop Culture Inspired Halloween Costumes

By S. Elfman

There is always so much inspiration in your favorite shows and films for Halloween costumes. Here are a ten that will be trending this year.

The Sanderson Sisters of “Hocus Pocus” Your favorite witch sisters – Winifred Sanderson (Bette Midler), Sarah Sanderson (Sarah Jessica Parker) and Mary Sanderson (Kathy Najimy) – have returned in the sequel to “Hocus Pocus.” Whether you choose to don a red, blonde or brunette wig and dress as your favorite sister, or grab two friends for a group costume, you won't go wrong with these witchy looks.

“Our Flag Means Death” cast HBO pirate series/LGBTQ romcom, “Our Flag Means Death,” has several fun characters to dress as. There's “The Gentleman Pirate” Stede and his frilly looks, the gruff Blackbeard and his leather ensembles, King George and his ruffled collar and more.

“House of the Dragon” cast

With this huge cast, it will be hard to choose someone to dress as, however, who can resist an eyepatch and a long platinum wig? You are likely to see at least one reveler dressed as Aemond Targaryan's badass character.

“Wednesday” cast/Addams Family or “The Munsters”

Gen-X celebrators can dress as their childhood favorites from “The Addams Family” or “The Munsters” as both have made comebacks this year. Both casts offer fun options, from the campiness of Herman Munster to the creepiness of Uncle Fester to the dark fun of Wednesday Addams.

“Top Gun: Maverick” cast

With the sequel to “Top Gun” making a hit this year, it is the perfect time to put on a flight suit and aviator glasses and do your best Tom Cruise or Jon Hamm impersonation. This is also a good idea for a group costume.

Eddie Munson, Vecna or the Demogorgan from “Stranger Things”

“Stranger Things” has become more popular than ever and the large cast of characters definitely offers something for everybody. Whether you want to go 1980s metalhead with a long wig, denim jacket and Metallica t-shirt, a la Eddie Munson, or scare the crowd with a Vecna or Demogorgon costume, you will definitely make an impact.

“Yellowjackets” cast Intrigued by the Showtime series “Yellowjackets”? You can go extra scary by dressing as the Antler Queen or just wear a soccer uniform and some fake blood from the plane crash and call it a day.

Horror classics

Of course, you can't go wrong dressed as Jason from “Halloween,” a vampire inspired by “Interview with the Vampire” or “What We Do in the Shadows” or “Vampire Academy” or Pinhead/Hell Priest from “Hellraiser.”

Dressing like Elvis never goes out of style, but this year it is especially on trend thanks to the recent biopic starring hottie Austin Butler. And there are so many options! You could be Elvis in his prime or an older, bloated Elvis. The choice is yours. Just don't forget that pompadour.

Dearly departed celebs

We've lost a lot of gay icons this year–Olivia Newton-John, Angela Lansbury, Naomi Judd, Queen Elizabeth II and Ivana Trump. It is the perfect time to do drag! Pop on a wig and honor these divas. Elvis

Hispanic HIV Leadership Awards Hunters

Photos: Robert Harley

Oh, The Horror! Scary Halloween Films & Shows

Dim the lights, grab the popcorn –and tons of candy. Treat yourself to one of Halloween season's finest indulgences: creepy, spooky, gory, goosebump-inducing horror flix and TV shows. These shows and films (by gay filmmakers and/or staring prominent gay characters) are certain to offer some good scares and perhaps even a few laughs.

• “The Hunger”

“The Hunger” has long held cult status not only as a horror flick, but also for its ties to the 1980s goth-rock scene. Bauhaus' “Bela Legosi's Dead” can be heard over the opening credits. Starring Catherine Deneuve, David Bowie and Susan Surandon, the erotic vampire classic tells the story of John (Bowie) who, after becoming Miriam's (Denueve) lover only obtains immortality–but not eternal youth, as his body continues to age at a staggering rate. The film is loosely based on Whitley Strieber's novel of the same name. It's streaming on HBO Max.

• “Hellbent”

2004's “Hellbent” is often celebrated as the first gay slasher film. After making the rounds in the gay/lesbian festival circuit, it finally obtained limited theatrical release in 2005. The film was written and directed by Paul Etheredge-Ouzts and stars Dylan Fergus, Bryan Kirkwood and Hank Harris. It involves a group of gay friends on a night out in West Hollywood who visit a crime scene wher e a gay couple was recently decapitated. Little do they know the sickle-bearing killer is lurking nearby and begins to take their trail. The soundtrack features classic queercore bands like Pansy Division. It's streaming on Spectrum, Here and Prime Video.

• “Velvet Buzzsaw”

This Netflix exclusive probably fits the thriller/dark comedy genres rather than horror, but it is a satirical and deeply unsettling look at the greed-laden world of art collectors. “Velvet Buzzsaw's” all-star cast includes Jack Gyllenhaal, Rene Russo, Toni Collete and John Malkovitch. Within the discovered works of an unknown artist resides a supernatural force that enacts revenge on the collectors who have polluted the art scene with their greed.

• “Chucky” TV series

The long-running “Child's Play” horror movie series now has a TV series named after its terrifying killer doll, “Chucky.” It returns for a second season this month on SyFy and USA. The show stars Zackary Arthur, Björgvin Arnarson and Alyvia Alyn Lin and is a sequel to the franchise's seventh film “Cult of Chucky.” Jack (Arthur) uses a good guy doll he purchases at a garage sale for his art project. It turns out the doll is possessed by Chucky's soul. In this latest season a gay romance blooms between Jack and his friend Devon.

• “Otto; or Up with Dead People”

“Otto” is a 2008 Zombie b-flick made by gay filmmaker Bruce la Bruce. Set in Berlin, Jay Crisfar plays Otto, who is convinced he is a zombie. He encounters a documentarian who decides to make Otto the focus of his new film project. Part zombie film, part mockumentary and way over the top, Otto embraces all the hallmarks that makes bhorror so campy and unique. It's streaming on Tubi and Prime Video.

Mr. Ramrod 2022

Photos: Coco Alarcon

Art Frenzie Celebrates its 25th Anniversary

If you have been in this town for more than a couple decades, like I have, there is no doubt you have grown to love Debbi and Bernadette 9owners of Art Frenzie). They have contributed and supported the South Florida gay scene in so many ways. Their biggest project, Art Frenzie, is turning 25 this November and I thought this would be a great time to sit down with my friends and chat about their thriving business.

Why did you gals open Art Frenzie?

By Scott Holland

Debbi – I had been in this business for 12 years, but I didn't agree with the ethics of my then boss, so I was thinking of changing jobs. At that time Bernadette and I were in a relationship, and she was a hairdresser. We both needed a change, so we decided to open a place of our own. George Kessinger (original owner of Georgie's Alibi) called us and told us we should open in the Alibi Plaza and that became our first location. We are now in our 4th location, but we have always stayed on the drive.

What's new at Art Frenzie?

A few months back we moved into our newest location at 2330 Wilton Dr., and we would like to thank the community for continuing to support us. In addition to that a lot of people don't know we have a second location that has more frames than artwork, but we are in the process of increasing the artwork there. It’s at 850 Flagler Drive. What makes Art Frenzie Unique? We specialize in the art of Custom Framing!

Our Motto is “Designed by You, Handcrafted by us.” We do offer a wonderful selection of moldings and artwork and keep up with the latest trends. Our retail pricing is very competitive, and we offer layaway plans with no interest.

We are also known for our unique custom mirrors & wide variety of home decor items; artisan jewelry & sculptures. In addition, we are the distributor for Steve Walkers Estate. Other things people may not know about Art Frenzie is that we do wholesale to the trade and our art and framework can be seen in many hotels and restaurants, and that we have a “come to you” service where we will come to your house or place of business.

“Other things people may not know about Art Frenzie is that we do wholesale to the trade and our art and framework can be seen in many hotels and restaurants...”

Sandy are opening Drag Vape Lounge in one of our up-front studios. When is the 25th celebration?

We are celebrating the whole week from November 5th through the 12th with 25% off any in-stock merchandise, but the actual celebration is Saturday, November 12 from 6:30-10pm and we will feature live entertainment, lite bites from Josie at Bubbles and Pearls Catering.

Call them for your free wall space consultation at (954)560-3684.

What does the future hold for Art Frenzie?

Hopefully 25 more years of giving quality workmanship and framing. In addition, we are applying for a wine and beer license and plan to sell that along with coffee. We are also planning to offer painting classes and in the very near future our friends Kodi and

By Maria Espinal

Sugar

788 Brickell Plaza #40 • Miami, FL 33131 • 786.805.4655

easthotels.com • Sun-Wed 4pm – 1am • Thur-Sat 4pm – 3am

Located in the East Miami Hotel, Sugar has a fantastic view of the Brickell area with an award-winning rooftop and lounge. Attracting locals and visitors with its hip and happening vibe, Sugar is intimately nested 40 floors up at the top of EAST Miami, in the heart of Brickell overlooking Miami's vibrant skyline and surrounded by the city lights at night. Note there is a dress code: Smart-casual attire encouraged during the day & Nightlife attire enforced after sunset with 21+ after 6pm. You can view their menu online to check their fantastic sushi rolls, sashimi and Thai dishes.

Café L' Europe 331 S. County Rd. • Palm Beach FL 33480 561.655.4020 • cafeleurope.com • Tue-Sun opens at 5pm

Proudly serving Palm Beach for 42 years, Café L'Europe welcomes you with warm hospitality, a lively and elegant atmosphere and elevated continental cuisine. If you are looking for a high-end location, this is a good choice and of course, some dishes can be pricey. From caviar to maple duck and veal chops, you can choose your favorite wine from their 2000-bottle cellar, or you can bring your own. L'Europe will be hosting a Halloween Party on Oct 31, 5-11pm.

Casablanca Café 3049 Alhambra St. • Fort Lauderdale, FL 33304 954.764.3500 • casablancacafeonline.com • Lunch Daily 8:30am11am • Sun-Thur 4:30pm – 10pm & Fri-Sat 4:30pm – 11pm

Formerly Nova House, Casablanca offers breakfast, lunch and dinner menus with a daily happy hour Mon – Fri, 4-7pm. Enjoy the ambiance of soft ocean breezes as you dine on the patio with a gorgeous view of Fort Lauderdale beach. From their dinner menu: Moroccan Spiced Crab Cake, Jumbo Shrimp Cocktail, French Onion Soup & Casablanca Salad, Deep Sea Linguini and their Moroccan Lamb Shank are fantastic.

Il Mulino

1800 E Sunrise Blvd. • Fort Lauderdale, FL 33304

954.524.1800 • ilmulinofl.com • Sun-Thur 11:30am – 9:30pm Fri 11:30am – 10:30pm • Sat 4pm – 10:30pm

Located in downtown Fort Lauderdale offering a wide range of Italian classics along with inspired specials. Lite and plant-based menu available. Highlighting their lunch menu, the Balsamic Chicken is delicious! Steak, Salmon and Cheese Tortellini Fiorentino are a great choice, too. Visit them online to see other menus or purchase a gift card. Buon appetite!

Visit Lauderdale Unveils “Everyone Under The Sun” Marketing Campaign

Visit Lauderdale, the official destination marketing organization (DMO) for Greater Fort Lauderdale in South Florida, unveiled its new brand campaign “Everyone Under the Sun” at its annual marketing luncheon at the reimagined Greater Fort Lauderdale/Broward County Convention Center. The vibrant campaign reflects Greater Fort Lauderdale's authentic welcoming vibe and its inclusive community.

“This campaign goes to the heart of what makes our community great – the people and our diverse offerings. We now have a strong campaign that truly reflects who we are and shows how special Greater Fort Lauderdale is in every bold, beautiful, and surprising way,” says Stacy Ritter, President, and CEO of Visit Lauderdale. “We are graciously welcoming everyone, and I mean everyone, to come join us and experience our tropical paradise rich with culture, flavor, and unique experiences. Our

diversity is our strength, and we are proudly telling this story to the world.”

The destination's commitment to inclusion is front and center with ads starring locals with disabilities, members of the area's LGBT+ community (Greater Fort Lauderdale is Florida's LGBT+ capital), people of a diverse age range and various racial and ethnic identities. People from more than 170 countries speaking 147 languages call Greater Fort Lauderdale home. Together, they make up the rich tapestry of Greater Fort Lauderdale, 31 municipalities strong. They are the welcoming committee for anyone and everyone who comes to visit.

Previously known as the Greater Fort Lauderdale Convention & Visitors Bureau with the tagline “Hello Sunny,” the DMO was

rebranded with the new tagline “Everyone Under the Sun” in May 2021. During the unprecedented time, Visit Lauderdale rallied not only the hospitality industry, but also businesses and residents to continue welcoming all. The new campaign showcases accessible beaches, thrilling outdoor adventures, immersive nature encounters, shopping, in-pool meetings, dock and dine, pampering, romance, and memory-making experiences for everyone under the sun.

The Marketing Luncheon was an amazing unveiling and presentation, and Stacy followed the luncheon by meeting with the press in a private room. Aqua, their advertising agency, and many of the talent from the new campaign was at this private meeting as well.

Take a look at some of this amazing campaign….

Miss Alibi 2022

Photos: Robert Harley

South Florida Pride Wind Ensemble Opens Its 2022-23 Season with “Beyond Borders 2” on Sunday, Nov 6th

A highlight of the evening will be an original piece by Emmy Award winning composer Julie Giroux. An accomplished orchestrator, composer, arranger, clinician and guest conductor, Giroux's recent symphonic masterpiece is the “Big Blue Marble.” She became the first female composer to have her work performed during a U.S. Presidential Inauguration ceremony when "Integrity March," the first movement from Giroux's Symphony No. 3 titled "No Finer Calling,” was played by the presidential band as Vice President Kamala D. Harris was introduced.

In addition, the extraordinary performance will explore cultural music from around the world and feature several guest artists including performers from Modern Marimba and an Argentinian tango duo, performed by members of the renowned dance troupe, Dance South Florida.

The South Florida Pride Wind Ensemble raises the curtain on its 2022-23 season with Beyond Borders 2 on Sunday, November 6 at 7 pm at the Amaturo Theater at the Broward Center for the Performing Arts.

In a loving celebration of our planet, the multisensory experience will feature videos emphasizing the beauty and fragility of Mother Earth shown on multiple screens in harmonic accompaniment with the musicians.

“As South Florida's only LGBT wind ensemble, we are incredibly proud to return for our 36th season stronger and more resilient than ever,” said Dan Basset t, artistic director for the South Florida Pride Wind Ensemble. “I'm fortunate to work with 60 incredible and extremely talented local musicians and encourage music lovers from all communities to attend this incredible concert.”

In-person tickets are $35 and can be purchased at browardcenter.org/events/detail/sfl-pridewind-ensemble-beyond-borders-2. For fans not able to attend in-person, a virtual livestream will be offered by Stream Ally at Southfloridapride.streamally.live, minimum suggested donation is $25.

By Tom Bonanti

SCARY BIG BICEPS AND HOW TO GET THEM!

You've got to admit that no muscle group or body part seems to garner more attention than a bulging pair of biceps. Although triceps make up most of the mass of your upper arms, about 75%, it's the biceps most people refer to when they admire “a great set of guns.” Let's examine biceps this week and how to take them from puny to scary big!

For maintenance, work biceps once a week for 20 minutes. To increase size and

build peaks, work them out twice to three times a week for the same amount of time. Make sure to rest muscles 48 to 72 hours between workouts. This gives broken down, exhausted muscle fibers a chance to recover and grow thicker. When performing reps, never jerk or swing the weight because the biceps can tear and snap like any other muscle when your form is clumsy and careless. Always make sure to stretch between sets and exercises to expedite

recovery and incur growth. I like to combine biceps with chest, shoulders or even legs, but never with back because any decent back routine is going to tax biceps, thus preventing you from really giving them your all.

Here are my four favorite exercises for building biceps. Do three sets of eight to twelve reps of each exercise.

1. Cable Curls: These are a nice alternative to barbells and dumbbells. Attach a straight bar to the lower cable assembly and grasp the bar with a medium-width, underhanded grip. Stand upright with the arms straight and the bar resting in front of the thighs. Keep your upper arms tight at your sides, bend the elbows and curl the bar up to the chin level. Pause briefly, squeeze the contraction and lower the bar back down slowly to starting position. Perform 3-4 sets of 8-12 reps.

2. Standing Dumbbell Curls: Here's a way to isolate each bicep. Stand upright, holding a dumbbell in each hand at your sides in a

palms-in grip. Keep the upper arms motionless as you bend the elbows and curl the weights upward turning the hands so that the wrists face the shoulders at the top. Pause, squeeze and lower back down twisting to the palms-in position. Perform 3-4 sets of 8-12 reps and feel the burn!

3. EZ Curls: Standing with knees slightly bent, grip an EZ curl bar (this bar is made explicitly for biceps training, it is bent in the middle to facilitate your grip) with palms facing up, shoulder-width apart. Curl the bar by flexing your arms at the elbow. Your elbows should remain close to your sides. Lower the weight in a controlled manner to starting position. Perform 3-4 sets of 8-12 reps and flex those guns! Remember to hold a powerful contraction at the top and slowly lower the weight down on the negative.

4. Incline Dumbbell Curls: Sit on a bench at a 45 degree incline. Keep your back straight, feet flat on the floor and arms at your side. Curl the dumbbell by flexing arms toward the shoulders. (You can do single alternating arms as well.) Slowly lower dumbbells in a controlled motion until your arm is extended. Perform 3-4 set of 8-12 reps.

Tom Bonanti is a certied tness trainer and massage therapist (MA#40288) with his own one on one gym in Ft. Lauderdale. Contact trainertomb@aol.com with questions or to set up a free tness consultation.

8 Tips to Declutter Your Home & Life for the Best Autumn Yet

By Christina Giaquinto

Fall is always an exciting time filled with trips to apple orchards, afternoons spent at pumpkin patches, Friendsgiving dinners, and… decluttering! And I don't just mean putting your surfboards in storage and finally ridding all kitchen countertops of scattered mail — I mean giving your home and lifestyle a whole fall refresh! Decluttering both your living space and life could be key for ensuring you have the best autumn yet.

In my experience as the Professional Organizer and Brand Ambassador of Modular Closets (DIY customizable closet units that organize any space in your home), I have discovered a number of helpful decluttering tips. Here are 8 of these tried-and-true strategies I wanted to share:

1. Organize a grab-and-go station for autumn essentials.

Isn't it the worst when you are trying to leave for an outing and can't find your keys, cellphone, or other essentials?

Don't let missing items put a damper on your fall festivities! Organize a bin by the front door or in the garage that contains autumn essentials like beanies, gloves, scarves, windbreakers, chapstick, and hand creams for your purse (the chillier weather can really dry out your skin!) so you are always ready for any fun fall plans. Whether you are planning to spend an afternoon apple picking or you want to wander through gorgeous fall foliage, you will be prepared for any outing.

2. Write down 5 things you want to do this autumn.

From camping excursions to costume parties and fall food festivals, it seems like once autumn hits there is almost TOO much you want to do. So declutter your plans by organizing a fall bucket list! By taking pen to paper and consciously thinking of what you want to experience this season, you will truly be able to make your autumn dreams a reality. Then, once you write down the top 5 must-do's, schedule each of them into your calendar. This will ensure you accomplish the bucket-list items and allow you to plan other activities around them.

4. Deep clean the windows. Do you love gazing out your windows at the changing leaves? Deep cleaning the windows needs to be a must on your autumn organizing to-do list, as it will help you enjoy the lovely fall days to the fullest! If your windows are covered in grime and streaks from the rainy spring and dry summer months, take an hour or two to spray all of them with a cleaning solution and wipe them until they sparkle! You will smile every time you look through them and notice how clear and clean they are.

3. Declutter last fall's essentials.

Garages and sheds tend to fill up with clutter from all the autumns beforehand. Spend a day decluttering broken Halloween decorations, chipped Thanksgiving dinnerware, broken baskets for apple picking, and costumes you no longer wear so that you will be able to replace ones that need to be replaced right away. Trust me, the last thing you would want is to start getting ready for a costume party and realize all of your costumes in storage are stained or have holes in them. By decluttering any items you no longer need, you make space for all your new autumn essentials which also frees energy for new memories.

5. Write down your home organizing goals.

Although autumn is typically filled with fun get-togethers with friends and family, Oktoberfest festivities, and other events, the season is a great time to accomplish your home organizing goals. Have you been meaning to paint one or more of your rooms a new color? Do you really want to clean every single carpet and rug in your living space? Commit to one home organizing project you have wanted to do this year, and allow yourself the fall to accomplish it. I highly recommend scheduling the project into your calendar so that there are plans set in stone to get it done!

6. Organize a travel station in your car.

Autumn is filled with family gatherings, adventure, tips to pumpkin patches, and travel, so it is paramount to have your car organized. First, do a deep clean. Yes, that means vacuuming under the seats and picking up all the stale Cheerios all over the floor. Once the car is deep cleaned, organize an autumn station that you keep in the trunk. Some ideas of things to include are hats, scarves, wipes to clean hands after apple picking, and extra sweaters. Preparation is key!

8. Organize your garden tools. Autumn means beautiful falling leaves! If your garden tools have been buried in the garage or shed all year round, this is the time to declutter any rusty or broken rakes and possibly purchase a new one. The last thing you want is to get ready to clean up piles of leaves and realize the handle on your rake broke while in storage!

7. Organize your fall clothes.

Out with summer and in with fall!

Spend an afternoon decluttering any autumn clothes that you no longer love wearing or that don't fit, and organize your closet so all your fall clothes are front and center. Hang up your favorite sweaters, put your glove and beanie sets together, clean and fold all of your pants and leggings, and clean your boots so they are ready for all of the fall festivities!

To Wrap It All Up

Now that fall is here, make it a priority to declutter both your living space and lifestyle so that the season is nothing short of marvelous. Several ways to do this include organizing a grab-and-go station for autumn essentials and writing a bucket list of 5 must-do fall plans. Also, declutter last season's essentials, deep clean the windows, and organize a travel station in your car. These are just a few ways to help ensure you have the best autumn yet!

Christina Giaquinto is the Professional Organizer and Brand Ambassador of Modular Closets (DIY customizable closet units that organize any space in your home). Christina focuses on giving her clients the tools, methods, and techniques to transform their lives and homes through decluttering and organizing. She combines spiritual coaching and organizing to help her clients let go of things that do not spark joy and happiness. Her work has been featured on sites like Popsugar, Women's Health, Reader's Digest, Realtor.com, The Spruce and Yahoo. www.modularclosets.com and www.christinagiaquinto.com

Sunday Tea Dance Scandals

Photos: Coco Alarcon

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By Andreus Quinones

Dear Andreus,

My best friend and I work at the same place, though I have been there longer. We both applied for a newly created position, that meant higher status and pay. Because we are best friends, we wished each other good luck, and vowed to be happy no matter which one of us got the position. The idea was that whoever gets promoted, then helps the other to move up. Well, my best friend got the position, and I can't help but feel slighted. I have been there longer and worked harder, and though I want to be happy for him, I just can't seem to shake this feeling. I told him that I was happy for him, but I almost want to leave and get another job. Is it bad that I feel this way?

Sincerely, Carlos P. Dear Carlos,

There is something very human about being competitive. I would try not to take your friend's promotion to heart. Remember that the plan was that whoever gets the position helps the other to advance. Try not to think of it from a perspective of loss, but maybe as an opportunity to get ahead, since you now have your friend in a position to potentially help you. Is this not what you would be doing for your friend if you got the promotion? Give things some time, and they should work themselves out. Be a friend, be supportive, and you might move up quicker than you think!

Dear Andreus,

I am an identical twin. My brother and I are not only identical in features, but in our mannerisms, our habits and in the way we talk. We tend to also have the same tastes in guys, seeing as we are both gay. My brother recently married his boyfriend of two years.

Because I didn't think it was going to last, I did a very bad thing. On a drunken night after the bar, I slept with my brother's husband while my brother was asleep. The boyfriend thought that I was my brother, and I played along. Now this is haunting me, but I feel like saying something would do more harm than good. What do I do? I am so afraid that one day that night might come up in conversation, and all of us would be devastated. Help.

Sincerely, Blake J. Dear Blake,

Well, looks like you have quite a situation. Regardless of whether you come clean or not, it is still going to weigh on you. No matter what, the outcome likely will not be pleasant. You could tell your brother and his husband, and potentially destroy their marriage, even though the boyfriend was not at fault. Just the same, you could keep it to yourself, and it come out later and destroy their relationship and your relationship with your brother. At the end of the day, there is no easy answer. You certainly have to be guided by your conscience in this situation. I always stand by honesty and transparency - but know, that there will likely be consequences. When we make bad decisions, we have to accept the result. Good luck!