SHINE - Issue 3

D I G I T A L

C O P Y

A V A I L A B L E

O N

I S S U U . C O M

10

The Gold In the

Garbage Pit ALUMNI SPOTLIGHT Walking in The Shoes of A Head Girl

...

Ways to Overcome

Grief

PERSONAL

FINANCIAL

PLANNING

Eliminating

Self-limiting

Beliefs | ISSUE 3 | SHINE MAGAZINE | i |

A M A G A Z I N E B Y T H E M U G O I R I O L D G I R L S A S S O C I AT I O N ( M O G A )

EDITORIAL TEAM

Inside: 5. EDITOR’S NOTE

7. MOGA NEWS

19

8

14. SME’S

16. ALUMNI SPOTLIGHT

26

27. PARENTING CORNER

38. MENTAL WELLNESS

31. WOMEN IN BUSINESS

43. MY LIFE EXPERIENCE

35. FINANCIAL TIMES

51. PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT

54. MPISHI NYUMBANI

54

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ABOUT MOGA

The Mugoiri Old Girls Association is the registered body for alumni of OLC Mugoiri Girls High School.

VISION

To be an interconnected alumnae network that is inspired, motivated and engaged to create positive change in our alma mater

MISSION To build a holistic, philanthropic and all-inclusive alumnae association engaged in development of strategies that reach, serve and support our stakeholders.

MOTTO & EMBLEM The association’s motto is “The Light Shines on” which is inspired by the school’s motto and depicts the continuity of the leadership values instilled by our alma mater. The Association’s emblem is a burning torch.

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OBJECTIVES a. To foster connectivity and strengthen ties by providing networking forums that create opportunities amongst the alumnae.

school by partnering with various institutions, individuals and the government through donations, development and social responsibility projects

b. To promote the welfare and economic wellbeing of members through the establishment of a Welfare fund and Savings & Credit Cooperative (SACCO)

e. To fundraise for the association’s activities through agreed upon avenues.

c. To extend support and uplift various categories of students through scholarship/bursary, mentorship, career fairs, and awarding of prizes.

g. To undertake any other objective/activity as may be agreed upon and passed during a general meeting by the association’s duly registered and paid up members.

d. To enhance performance of the

f. To function as a non-political welfare body.

CORE VALUES Our core values are: a. Integrity and Ethics – Doing the right thing in an honest, fair and responsible way to build and sustain strong, loyal and trusting relationships b. Respect & Diversity – Demonstrating utmost respect for individual human rights, diversity, confidentiality and privacy therefore eliminating discrimination to boost the confidence in members participation

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c. Collaboration & Teamwork – In working collaboratively, we can engage our wealth of varied and diverse knowledge to create teams that serve to achieve the association’s objectives d. Service – With commitment and compassion we are guided by our commitment to grow and serve one another. e. Innovation – Fostering an inclusive environment we can find new ways of working to create an association we are proud of and that others can use as a benchmark

EDITOR’S Note Dear Reader, Glory be to God, It’s a Happy New Year 2022!

Another God given opportunity to 365 days, ways and chances to shine brighter and broader.

I

n resonating with the new year’s speech from our President Hon. Uhuru Kenyatta, the New Year is a time to reflect with immense gratitude on the accomplishments and breakthroughs of the last 12 months. A time to think about what worked, what did not, and what we can reimagine in view of growth that will bring about positivity in every life event by building back better.

It’s always our joy to keep us abreast with astounding happenings of our day to day life, cross-cutting all sectors. So, with that in mind, we decided to cast our gaze on those

things around us we take for granted as a result of disinformation and for our readers to digest as they reflect, muse on as well as chew over.

I am very proud of the all the alumni contributions and the editorial team for continually letting the light shine on in matters readership. To note is, through

their dedication and commitment to excellence we are glad to have the opportunity to publish our third edition of Shine Magazine. To all that bring out the light and feedback through our social media platforms we appreciate your incredible comments, eye opening thoughts and insightful suggestions.

“I am very proud of the all the alumni contributions and the editorial team for continually letting the light shine on in matters readership.” | ISSUE 3 | SHINE MAGAZINE | 5 |

“The Shine Magazine Editorial Team wishes you a Luminous New Year 2022!”

Keep the gleam.

for astounding steps towards goals. They say a journey of a thousand miles starts with a step, as you push forward look back at your past because it is visible and concrete.

Your past victories and failures are spread out for all to see. This should never deter you to progress but instead remind you that it always seems impossible until its done.

To keep in mind is challenges are part of life to every new beginning.

Commit every plan that for the year 2022 to the almighty God, lay down strategies to do things differently in order to achieve credible results.

It’s better to plan and fail than to fail because you didn’t plan. Create time to celebrate the little milestones as the year This year adorns a bright advances as this accounts future which is invisible

to the naked eye, and only those with the lens of great faith can see it; and only the venturesome and the audacious can achieve it.

We must also look back on this year with the knowledge that brighter days are ahead of us that although our challenges are great, each of us has the courage and determination to rise up and meet them. And in the spirit of our motto, Lets Be the Light!

The Shine Magazine Editorial Team wishes you a Luminous New Year 2022! And Hey! New is the year, new are the hopes, new are the resolutions, new are the plans, remember to discover the new YOU! Thank you for your readership.

Rachael Steve | 6 | SHINE MAGAZINE | ISSUE 3 |

MOGA NEWS Did you have a chance to catch up with the

end year update? If not, here is your 2nd chance to hear more about what the association achieved in 2021!

END YEAR UPDATE Dear members,

W

e wish to thank you all for the support accorded to the Executive Committee throughout 2021. Without you, the association cannot exist or function. Our end year newsletter reviewed the year in summary. In case you missed it, journey with us back into memory lane at some of the 2021 key highlights.

BURSARY FUND We are deeply thankful that in 2021,

EQUIPPING THE HOME SCIENCE LAB

our biggest highlight was that we managed to sponsor 51 students at OLC Mugoiri Girls using the funds raised In February 2021, we were able for bursary during the dinner. A total to further equip the Home Science of Kshs 1,124,408 was dispensed to the lab. In 2018, we purchased 8 cookschool account. ers as part of the 80th anniversary It is our hope that we can hold another but found that there was still a gap fundraiser (physical or virtual) early in in basic utensils and equipment.

2022 to be able to sponsor more students. More details will be shared later.

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The items were presented to the school and students who were very appreciative of the gesture. It is important to note that the mean score for this subject has continued to improve since 2018 especially due to the improved ease and convenience of conducting practical examinations.

LAST EXPENSE COVER In April of this year, the association

launched the last expense cover which is part of the Welfare fund. The Last Expense cover is a funeral cover to help members deal with the burden of meeting the last respect expenses on the | 8 | SHINE MAGAZINE | ISSUE 3 |

demise of an immediate family member.

Participation was on a VOLUNTARY basis.

The purpose behind this was to ease the burden of funeral contributions when alumni lost a family member which had become overwhelming and was also bringing about a sense of inequity as different amounts were contributed during each incidence.

So far, a total of 4 members have been able to claim a total of Kshs 100,000 each within 2021. Henceforth, funeral or bereavement contributions in the main alumni groups have been restricted to the loss of an alumni only and so far over Kshs 300,000 has been raised in 2021 during these sad occurrences when a comrade has left us. However, individual year/class groups as still free to support members on the occasion of the loss of a family member. If you do not have a year group as yet, we highly encourage you to form one and identify a class representative. The cover will be renewed in April 2022 and new members are welcome to join.

NEW MOGA CONSTITUTION On the 5th of June 2021, a special

general meeting was held to review and adopt the new MOGA constitution. This was the culmination of a 2-year process conducted by a specially constituted

review committee consisting of 5 advo- If you are yet to receive your certificate, cates and 3 ordinary members. The SGM please email the secretary on mugoiriwas successful and the new constitution oldgirls@gmail.com. was adopted by members, presented to the Registrar of Societies on 16th June, and fully adopted by the State Counsel on 26th June 2021.

This was indeed a major milestone that we continue to celebrate as we work towards full implementation. A BIG thank you to the review committee for all the hard work!

MEMBERSHIP NUMBERS AND CERTIFICATES Each member of the association was

issued a membership number and certificate this year. This is a process done to enhance record-keeping and ensure each member can be uniquely identified. This fosters a sense of belonging within the association. The certificate can also be presented in other forums to confirm one is indeed a member of the association.

APPOINTMENT OF CHIEF JUSTICE MARTHA KOOME

Whilst this was not a direct accom-

plishment of the association, we were proud to be associated with the appointment and inauguration of the first female Chief Justice in Kenya, an honorable registered member of the association and an auspicious alumni of Mugoiri Girls. The association was able to participate in the process by issuing an endorsement letter to the Judicial Service Commission (JSC).

We continue to celebrate with CJ Martha Koome and stand with her in prayer as she executes her duties with valor and impartiality in this very important role for our country.

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Whilst we successfully managed to with other organizations mid-2022. achieve the above milestones, we also struggled in the following areas: -

ELECTIONS & AGM The 3-year term for the current

officials has come to an end and thus elections as per the new constitution are due.

The call for nominations for the new positions was made in October/November 2021. However, the response was slow and majority of the positions have only managed to garner a single nominee.

This hampered the process and led to us not holding the AGM in December as previously planned as the two processes are closely linked as per the new constitution due to the ratification of elections.

Elections (via online voting) will be held on 29th January 2022 and the AGM on 12th February 2022 where the elections will be ratified and the new Executive committee shall take office.

Additional details and audited accounts will be shared closer to the date.

MENTORSHIP

However, we had the opportunity to participate in the annual Talent and cultural fair in November 2021 which was loads of fun and a few of the alumni had the opportunity to address the students.

SOCIAL EVENTS No social events were held during

2021 as well due to the COVID 19 pandemic. Again, we pray and hope to resume these in 2022 and have loads of fun together. Such events are very important for networking and bonding purposes.

SHINE MAGAZINE

In 2021, no mentorship sessions The alumni magazine was launched were held at the school as the COVID 19 pandemic continued to rage. We look forward to a pandemic-free year so that we can resume the sessions. In particular, we would wish to hold a Career fair in partnership | 10 | SHINE MAGAZINE | ISSUE 3 |

in 2020 and covers a myriad of issues and areas pertinent to members.

Unfortunately, no issue was published in 2021 due to time constraints occasioned within the editorial team.

the association and impacting lives positively. Specifically, we hope to see the MOGA SACCO come to life within the term of the new team, a more enhanced Welfare Fund, as well as many more enriching initiatives that will benefit members, students, the school, and the community at large.

We take this opportunity to wish you all a Happy New Year filled with prosperity, abundance, goodwill, triumph in all your goals, and excellence in all that you do!

However, the magazine will be back with a bang in January 2022!! Look out for VIVA MOGA! May the light in us conthe next issue. Hard copies of the past tinue to shine even brighter in 2022. editions are now available for purchase.

WHAT DOES 2022 HOLD?

Sincerely,

The Executive Committee.

As we usher in the new year and a

new Executive Committee in February, we hope that the new leadership team will carry on the vision of growing

you ARE upto DATE!!! | ISSUE 3 | SHINE MAGAZINE | 11 |

HOW CAN I BECOME A REGISTERED MEMBER OF THE ASSOCIATION? Become a member of MOGA today and join the team of amazing alumni in our journey to

GO BACK & GIVE BACK to our alma mater!

WHY REGISTER AS A MEMBER? 1. To associate with other alumni of like mind and with common objectives 2. To foster a sense of community and purpose 3. Provides an opportunity to give back in a formal, authenticated and organized manner 4. Creates continuity in engagement 5. Provides networking opportunities among members 6. Ensures validity of the association through formal membership 7. Unity of strength

HOW MUCH DOES IT COST TO REGISTER? It will cost Kshs 1000 to register as a member. This consists of an initial

registration fee of Kshs 500 and an annual membership fee of Kshs 500.

Once you register, you will only pay the annual fee in subsequent years. This money goes towards meeting the administrative costs of the association including the annual general meeting (AGM).

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HOW TO REGISTER IN 4 EASY STEPS! Step 1: Visit our facebook page https://www.facebook.com/ Mugoirioldgirlsassociation/

Step 2: Click on the provided form (pinned post) to register as a member.

Step 3: Complete and submit the form.

Step 4: Make your payment via Paybill: 400222, Account No. 320714#yourname

*You will receive a confirmation message from Cooperative Bank. Please do not forget to put the hashtag before entering your name!

WELCOME TO MOGA!

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Can SME’s in agriculture

borrow without collateral?

By Dr. Peris Mburu | 14 | SHINE MAGAZINE | ISSUE 3 |

T

he agriculture sector contributes approximately 33% of Kenya’s Gross Domestic Product (GDP), accounts for 65% of export earnings and employs more than 40% of the total population, making it central to Kenyans’ livelihoods and food security. However, despite the sector’s significant contribution to the economy, it only constitutes 11% of financial institutions assets. Access to agricultural financing is a major challenge faced by smallholder farmers and micro, small and medium enterprises (MSMEs) in the agribusiness sector.

The low lending rates can be attributed to expensive collateral requirements by financial institutions (FIs). Due to stringent collateral requirements, up to 60% of MSMEs’ loan applications are rejected due to inadequate, or lack of, collateral.

platforms whose amounts are small and hardly adequate for growth depend- credit infrastructure will ing on the stage of SME be required for safe use of this kind of data. growth.

Are there any options left for the agricultural SMEs? We are living in the era of the ‘big data’ majorly drawn from alternative sources such as social media, telcos and utility companies. The fintechs and telcos are leveraging big data to build algorithms that have enabled them to lend digitally without collaterals.

This, in my view, is where the future of lending lies.

Data concerning weather patterns and farmer’s production trends can be used to build credible algorithms that can accurately assess the agricultural SME’s risk without over reliance on collaterals. A The option is to borrow facilitative legal framefrom the agile digital work and the necessary

About the Author Dr Mburu is a financial consultant. She holds a Doctorate in Business Administration from Nelson Mandela Metropolitan University, an MBA from Kenyatta University, BA from the University of Nairobi and Advanced Diploma in Credit Analysis from the Chartered Institute of Bankers in Scotland.

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ALUMNI SPOTLIGHT

WALKING IN THE SHOES OF A

HEAD GIRL | 16 | SHINE MAGAZINE | ISSUE 3 |

S

ome of us admired them, others feared them and a majority wanted to BE THEM! The position of Head Girl or as is now been renamed to “School President” remains the key leadership position within any school community and one of great importance both to students and the administration.

A Head Girl’s role includes liaising with the school administration on various matters, providing overall leadership to students and to other prefects as well. A Head Girl is also expected to share pupil’s ideas, complaints or petitions to the school administration. In latter years, this role has been expanded to include delivery of speeches during both external and internal school events. Head Girls are also expected to lead

by example and be role help in conflict resmodels for other students. olution/mediation etc. As such, Head In many schools in the Girls were carefully past, the Head Girl was selected (and continue appointed by the Principal to be) and appointed upon recommendations into this position. They by teachers. However, this are considered the crème process has evolved to an de la crème of the school. electoral process which is deemed to be more fair In this feature, we interand less dictatorial. Some viewed two former Head of the qualities a good Girls at Mugoiri and learn Head Girl should possess what it felt like to walk are excellent leadership in these big shoes. We skills, be a team player, a will also get to hear how good time manager, pos- being a Head Girl influsess organizational skills, enced their lives post-high be a great public speaker, school.

“As such, Head Girls were carefully selected (and continue to be) and appointed into this position. They are considered the crème de la crème of the school.” | ISSUE 3 | SHINE MAGAZINE | 17 |

ANNEROSE GACHINI HEAD GIRL 1986/1987

M

y name is Annrose Gichuhi. I served as the school head girl in year 1986/1987 under the leadership of Mrs. Mugo as the Principal and Mrs. Nderi as the Deputy Principal.

Currently I am an entrepreneur in the hospitality industry where I serve as a Director at Lukenya Resorts and also at our current new entry which is in pest control and hygiene services. Just to mention both are family businesses which I have seen grow and had opportunities to bring on board quite a number of employees to help us achieve our mission and vison.

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How was your leadership experience at the helm of OLC? I must confess during

our times, as A level student, I did not encounter so much of difficulties during my tenure since the student leaders were very responsible and highly respected unlike today where students can defy their school leaders.

It also happens that in my previous school in O Levels, I was also a head girl and this gave me an easier time performing my duties with ease both as a student and as the school captain. We as students were very cooperative because we believed in the great leadership that was offered by our predecessors.

What lessons did you learn from leadership at OLC that you are using now in adulthood?

One of the greatest

lesson as a leader I learnt was to keep a sharp focus on my dreams and vision and most importantly to put my trust in God by ensuring I attended our

school mass all the time.

I have been able to pass on these traits even after I left the now OLC Mugoiri Girls, where I joined Catholic University and was elected the Students President. Indeed, I can confidently say leadership comes from God through my experiences thus far.

After clearing Campus, I got an opportunity to work

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as a Marketing Manager for a company, which some of my colleagues felt I was not up to the task. I remember giving the assignment my all and they could not believe it.

One time I went to the UK to receive an award for my impeccable efforts in the Marketing Arena.

Were the leadership training sessions helpful in your

leadership at OLC?

played a great role?

Very helpful. My smooth transition to OLC Mugoiri Girls can all be attributed to the experience I had throughout my A levels, prior to joining in both my O levels and later Catholic University.

Aha! Yes … I vividly remember one time when some students sneaked out of school and went to the nearby Kahuro market…

They were dressed like civilians and thus ended up in a pub and started ordering for drinks. After some time of enjoying the drinks some civilians realized this were not just their daily customers but students who had sneaked

Is there a moment that you well remember your leadership skill

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out of school. A concerned civilian called the school to inform the principal who was a little hesitant since that was unlike OLC Mugoiri Girls since there had been no such a case witnessed before. It was not until I and a few teachers with our deputy rushed to the scene only to be met by the reality of the whole scenario. The students were quickly whisked to the school van and taken back to school. And of course being a disciplinary case, the students were subjected to a whole week punishment of scrubbing the school pathways. The students reformed and were never again involved in such matters till we completed school.

What can you describe as good leadership?

Leadership is God given and we owe God the

service we give to others anytime you are given an opportunity to lead.

As a student President in Catholic University, I practiced traits of good leadership that I learnt from the administrators and from guidance from my mentors. I have been privileged enough to also offer leadership in women groups such as Ushindi Women Group and Women of Valor. Just to mention also having a supportive spouse contributes a lot to offering good leadership not only at the family level but also in your other endeavors.

My husband has been a supportive pillar having worked for the government as an administrator which has seen our collaborative efforts take our family business to greater levels each day.

Every business requires good planning that can only be executed through good leadership.

How did you handle spiteful remarks aimed at you as a leader?

Always remember not everybody will celebrate your achievements and not

“Leadership is God given and we owe God the service we give to others anytime you are given an opportunity to lead. ” | ISSUE 3 | SHINE MAGAZINE | 21 |

everybody is happy with and vision. our trust in God, Jeremiah what you are doing. If you 17:7-8 says “But blessed is allow God to be your guid- What is one the one who trusts in the ing light then you need thing that you Lord, whose confidence is not to fear. You should in him. 8 They will be like would attribute continue doing what you a tree planted by the water to your success in have been tasked to do in that sends out its roots entrepreneurship joy and in no time they by the stream. It does not will see what God does apart from good fear when heat comes; its through those that entrust Leadership? leaves are always green. It him with everything they has no worries in a year That must be my serido. of drought and never fails ous dedication to tith- to bear fruit”. ing as the Bible states in How did you guard Malachi 3:10. Since I knew We also have cultivated against pride so this secret in 2004, my good relationships with that you were not finances and cash flow our God given family arrogant and aloof? took a drastic change. This friends. has seen us grow in busiDedicating my time to ness as a family as well as God. Actually am just from the gym, having attended my morning mass and later I will embark to my day’s “At times friends and family will business which entails overseeing my businesses doubt your capabilities but keep and offering guidance where needed. At times proving them wrong by not only friends and family will doubt your capabilities working hard and smart but also but keep proving them keeping a sharp focus so as to wrong by not only working hard and smart but also achieve your goals and vision. ” keeping a sharp focus so as to achieve your goals | 22 | SHINE MAGAZINE | ISSUE 3 |

JANET KAHURO HEAD GIRL 2000/2001

M

y name is Eng. Janet W. Kahuro, working as a Civil and Structural Engineer at Kenya Airports Authority (KAA). I am an Alumni of Mugoiri girls, year 2001 and I was privileged to serve as the Deputy Head girl in 2000 and Head girl in 2001.

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How was your leadership experience at the helm of OLC?

Mugoiri that you are the Student council now using in your life in quelling student today? unrests in schools?

Leadership prepared me to As the Head girl, I got to handle people from varied interact with every stu- backgrounds, with differdent from the form 1 stu- ent personalities. dents who were joining It has also helped me the school and continuing in decision making and students. I also interacted leading others in the varclosely with teachers, prin- ious organisations I have cipal, and support staff. worked in. I also never hesI enjoyed serving the itate taking up leadership school at that capacity roles when called upon or although it sometimes had opportunities arise. its challenges especially when the student staged Were the training a protest. Despite that, I sessions offered at relished serving in my role.

What lessons did you learn from your leadership experience at

Mugoiri helpful?

Yes, the leadership training sessions were very helpful.

What is the role of

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The student Council during or before student riots play a vital role as follows: • They help to identify or listen to student grievances and present them to the school administration. This helps to prevent any unrest from occurring If their needs are addressed.

• By building peer friendships with the students, they are able to discuss any issues and find solutions without rioting or protests.

• Being other student’s role models, prefects

lead by example thereby am and reading till 7am. I setting a peaceful would also read between environment 8pm to 12pm at night.

During the day, I helped my parents at home.

Were you able to balance your books Teachers also played a key role in my performance as and the leadership they were always ready role? to guide me where I had Yes, I was able to balance gaps. I managed to score books and leadership. I an A- being No. 2 in our ensured I allocated extra school and the No. 3 girl in time to study, especially the District (now Muranga when I had to assume my County).

deep desire to be accepted.

Therefore, I had to learn very fast how to handle these remarks although they were but a few.

Unfortunately, this was a period whereby prefects were not liked and many incidences had been reported of harm on prefects in other schools. I therefore tried to do a few things to help me through as follows.

role as a Head girl. I did this by waking up earlier, How did you handle studying when the stu- spiteful remarks dents were doing general aimed at you as a cleaning or when I got free leader? time. I also revised a lot during school holidays. I At first it was not easy. remember waking up by 4 At that age one had a

“Leadership prepared me to handle people from varied backgrounds, with different personalities.”

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“I ensured I allocated extra time to study, especially when I had to assume my role as a Head girl.”

1. I had close and supportive friends (Ann Karara, Joyce Uimbia and Eros) and I would share with them the challenges I

was experiencing. These friends became my support pillar.

2. The student Christian leaders who were also my friends gave me encouraging words.

3. My parents would also encourage me when they came for school visiting days. I would share some of the challenges I was experiencing.

their role model

In closing, how did you guide against pride so that you were not arrogant or aloof?

By realising that one was called to be a servant leader and many students looked up to me.

In addition, I ensured that I worked with other students and interacted 4. I ignored most of the freely with them especially negative remarks. those of lower forms. I 5. Deriving satisfaction also held student forums and joy from those who where we discussed issues gave beautiful remarks on a round table. and looked up to me as

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PARENTING

My experience as a single parent

By Caroline Njeri Muchai

| ISSUE 3 | SHINE MAGAZINE | 27 |

N

ot many women get children so as to bring them up alone, but well…. it happens. I got pregnant in my fourth year of campus and delivered just before I completed my exams.

The journey has been interesting. At first I was shocked.

I remember sitting on my bed and wondering what mess I had gotten myself into. In other moments, I was happy that I could at least conceive, knowing that there were many women who would have wished to be in my position. | 28 | SHINE MAGAZINE | ISSUE 3 |

A

s the pregnancy proceeded, I had morning sickness, experienced weight loss among other symptoms.

After the 9-month wait, I successfully delivered a beautiful baby girl via caesarian section and I thanked God. Naming the child was my whole and sole affair as the baby’s father was MIA (missing in action). He left and only appeared on an on and off basis. I don’t like fights and forcing issues, so I decided to let him be. As I pondered on what to name my baby, I decided that I wanted a Swahili name and no surname. It was all easy and for her middle name, I named her after my mom. Incidentally, I have a similar name to my mom so my girl is also called Njeri.

I had my own fears on being a single mother due

to the fear of judgement by the society having been brought up in a Christian family. I had gotten born again when in class seven and I am still saved. I was still saved even when I got pregnant. I had fears of being asked about the father of my child, why I was not married and all, but I realized there were many other single mums out here, so I overcame my

fear and faced the world.

After all, we all make mistakes. What differs is the type of mistakes we make.

Single parents can be discriminated against which is really unfair and uncalled for. I once went to a hospital where I was asked for the father of my child and the person at the reception refused to register us. Another difficult period I recall was when I

“Single parents can be discriminated against which is really unfair and uncalled for. I once went to a hospital where I was asked for the father of my child and the person at the reception refused to register us.” | ISSUE 3 | SHINE MAGAZINE | 29 |

once worked in an office where people spoke about their husbands a lot. To cope with the situation, I created my own husband and spoke about him too!

sure about the whole issue, I wouldn’t be comfortable. On child support, I once tried telling my own dad that I would sue my daughter’s father and he warned me against it My happiest moments saying that God will help were when my daughter me and indeed God has started school. However, I helped. was unable to raise school fees which even other Does my daughter ask people in marriage expe- about the dad? Yes she rience but at that moment does. When she was about I wished my daughter’s 8-9 years she asked my father would help me. sister. Unfortunately, my I have since learned to sister doesn’t know the dad put my greatest hope in so that was not forthcomGod, He has been faithful ing. She eventually got his and a provider. My family number, texted but he was has been there for me and cold. My daughter was have helped me to bring deeply heartbroken. I was up my girl. I learned to equally hurt on her behalf accepted the help. Many but I was glad that she times, I have had to take could now see for herself my girl to my mom which that he was not a good dad. was a relief but damaging. I had never bad mouthed Sometimes she would call him to her. But this was me by my name ‘Carol’. the beginning of God’s Some of lowest memo- healing, she accepted the ries came about when I man wasn’t interested in couldn’t afford basics and us and she started praying my mind would race. I and fasting. God hears us would wonder to myself when we call. My baby “What if this man never left? fasted for three days and What if I asked for help? asked God for a dad. A What if…. what if….. “ year later, God answered our prayers. She got the On co-parenting, I am not dad she prayed for and I | 30 | SHINE MAGAZINE | ISSUE 3 |

got a husband!

Single parenthood isn’t a walk in the park, you need to be strong for your children and you can’t just give up on life. This far, God has been Ebenezer. As a single mum, don’t shy off from asking for help, don’t be desperate, and if your child’s father offers help, accept it. If nothing comes your way, soldier on. Make your child a friend and never see as if they are a hindrance to you.

“My happiest moments were when my daughter started school. ”

In this section, we feature alumni who have started their own business and learn how they have successfully navigated the world of entrepreneurship.

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My Name is Caroline Nyambura Wanjugi, Year of KCSE 1994, I am a Business Executive by Profession and the Founder/ CEO of Caarel Quality Services & Solutions.

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e are experts in offering Consulting Services to organizations implementing ISO Standards in readiness for ISO Certification. We also offer Training in ISO Standards which is our core business. We are also venturing into Statutory Compliance Audits and Training in relation to Nema and DOHSS ACTS. My experience in Mugori was all-round exposure and nurturing, in the sense that despite gaining education, it offered me strong spiritual knowledge and a strong foundation which is why I am a very staunch Catholic up to date. The school nurtured me to be a leader. I was the House captain of the cleanest Dorm called Usambara House. The experience also shaped me into a

very responsible, principled lady with a strong personality and character.

I embrace leadership roles well and above all, fitting in very well in the society at large.

in the corporate world, I started feeling a gap and the need to developing my own brand. Hence, Caarel Quality Services & Solutions was born.

The top 5 lessons I have With regards to entrepre- learned in business over neurship, I have always time are: wanted to have an entity 1. Patience is key - no of my own i.e. being my overnight success. It own boss-lady. Having is a gradual but a sure worked for several years journey

“The school nurtured me to be a leader. I was the House captain of the cleanest Dorm called Usambara House. The experience also shaped me into a very responsible, principled lady with a strong personality and character. ” | ISSUE 3 | SHINE MAGAZINE | 33 |

2. Consistency - You have also key, hence how you deal to keep doing what you with customers determines more future engagements with got to do consistently them. Thirdly, when ventur3. Focus - You must put ing into a business you must all your mind into your be ready to take risks or else business for it to flourish. you will never know if you are 4. Commitment: You must worth the risk.

be ready to sacrifice more Would I advise anyone time for your business. to take the big plunge 5. In business you keep into entrepreneurship? learning new things, Personally, my Mantra is hence reading is a must everyone has their own to keep up with new destiny, desires, preferences and above all plans. I would trends in the market. urge my fellow alumni to Some of the pitfalls one have some entity attached can avoid are procrastina- to them in the long run. tion which is a dream killer. One cannot be employed If you have something you forever, but business can want to do, do it anyways and be passed on to children avoid pushing to a further and generations to come. date. Customer retention is

Contact details: Caarel Quality Services & Solutions Website: https://caarelquality.com.

Ongata Rongai, Rescom House, the National Bank Building, 5th Floor after Masai Lodge Tel No. 0721 253499

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Personal Financial Planning

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very time we usher in a new year, we make goals, plans and resolutions. Most if not all of these goals and plans directly or indirectly involve our finances. Sadly, most of us do not meet half of the goals. Financial

illiteracy and indiscipline are the reasons most of us fail to achieve our set financial goals. Financial illiteracy and indiscipline is the inability of an individual to make prudent financial decisions such as paying bills on time despite having the resources and spending on unnecessary items only for them to deplete their funds before meeting the real needs. | ISSUE 3 | SHINE MAGAZINE | 35 |

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n 2022, we must resolve and strive to achieve financial literacy and discipline in order to attain our financial goals. We will accomplish this by coming up with a SMART financial plan for the year. Coming up with a SMART financial plan entails identifying, prioritizing and scheduling the needs on the expenditure side and realistically allocating projected income to the needs. While coming up with the plan, saving for investments and emergency funds must be prioritized. While there exists many formulas on how much of our earnings

we should save, we should exercise caution on the realities of time value for money. It is only prudent to save where our money

continues to earn interest to cater for inflation and ensure our money retains its value. Available platforms include government

“Best practice requires regular review of 2022 plans against actual performance. Monthly and quarterly reviews will help us track and monitor performance on a timely basis instead of waiting for surprises at

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year-end.”

“We have many lonely people who have achieved financial success.” securities, unit funds such as money market funds and term deposits offered by banks. Please let us extreme caution and if possible desist from schemes that promise unusual and extremely high returns above what the market offers, usually a return of 6% to 12% per annum.

Best practice requires

regularly review of 2022 plans against actual performance. Monthly and quarterly will help us track and monitor performance on a timely basis instead of waiting for surprises at year-end.

a tendency that we should avoid at all costs.

Additionally, it is good to remember that money can’t buy love/friendships.

We have many lonely people who have achieved financial success. We might be careful not to overwork to achieve financial goals at the cost of spending While it is important to time with loved ones, and achieve financial suc- eventually become lonely cess, striking a balance is and disconnected, always imperative. Too much unbalanced pressure to achieve financial goals may result in overindulgence, addiction or even CPA Frashier Nduta suicide. When people’s Muiruri is the self-worth is dependent Co-Founder and on financial success, their Director at Upskill feelings are determined by Business Solutions the amounts of money that Limited (www.upskillthey have. Consequently, business,com) A conthey feel good when they sulting firm offering are doing well financially Accounting, Tax and and feel worthless when Audit services. financially insecure. This

Disclaimer

About the Author

| ISSUE 3 | SHINE MAGAZINE | 37 |

10 WAYS TO OVERCOME GRIEF

By Ann Wahito

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hat moment that you never forget. When the world at best slows down, sometimes shifts, and at the worst, stops all together. That moment when you are told that the loved one that you never envisioned living

without, has gone forever. That moment that you want to erase from your memory forever.

Losing a family member, a loved one or a friend is a difficult

process. Our grief takes us to difficult places and through difficult processes. Readjusting to life without the dearly departed can take a long time. Grief can take the form of sadness, guilt, yearning, anger and even regret. The hardest part of losing someone is the gap left behind. The love, the laughter, the pain, the memories; all these things are an everpresent epitaph that we carry with us. | ISSUE 3 | SHINE MAGAZINE | 39 |

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re there ways to a dear one: heartfelt prayer for face up to and when you just cannot 1. Pain go beyond the find the words.

Let yourself feel the heart-wrenching grieving Prayer is powerful pain and all the other process? Even Job himself because it keeps alive emotions. Do not questioned God after he the hope that you can attempt to minimise lost his wife, children and go on; and that you it or hold it back. It possessions! will make it regardhurts. Allow yourself less of how much Job 3:20a, 24 Why is light to hurt and come to your heart hurts right given to one burdened the realisation that now. with grief…?... I sigh when the deceased is truly food is put before me, and gone. Let it hurt.

3. Physical Activities my groans pour out like Activities such as 2. Prayer water. exercise, dance, long Whisper. Cry. Stay walks, aerobics – Grief, like every other passilent before God – it anything really that sion, is blind. It knows no all counts as a deep rhyme or reason. Every day activities may feel impossible. Grief flows “Prayer is powerful because it and ebbs. It leaves you helpless in its grip as the keeps alive the hope that you can pain of loss washes over you again and again – in go on; and that you will make the oddest of places and it regardless of how much your strangest of times.

Here are some ways to tide you over the loss of | 40 | SHINE MAGAZINE | ISSUE 3 |

heart hurts right now.”

“It is important to be around people who do not try to tell you to snap out of it – you need people who can see you through this process and allow you to come to the peace you need to move forward.” works up a sweat – are beneficial to the body and the mind.

Exercise releases endorphins in the body, which reduce your pain perception.

They also trigger a positive feeling in the body. Physical activities allow you to take a well-needed break and reset your headspace and your heart.

4. Take A Break Give yourself a break from grieving. Find a distraction. Go for a movie, or out to brunch; listen to music, get a massage or manicure. This

helps you to reset, adjust, and advance to the next steps.

5. Journaling Put things down on paper. It is powerfully cathartic. It could be a letter to your loved one, telling them all that has been left unsaid. It could be little stories that you wish to share with them but cannot, or an emotion that you want to capture on paper because it is too painful to speak out loud.

6. Reading Sit down with reading

material – could be that book on mechanics, a thriller, a romance novel or a magazine. Reading boosts your brainpower, reduces stress and lowers blood pressure and overall promotes calmness.

7. A Solid Support System Having a good support system means you can just be you – breakdown when you need to, talk for hours about your loved one should you need to or just sit silently, knowing that you are not being judged for what you are expressing. It is important to be around people who do not try to tell you to snap out of it – you need people who can see you through this process and allow you to come to the peace you need to move forward.

8. Memorialise A memorial is a beautiful way to “physically” work through your grief. It can be as simple as planting

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a tree or a flower in a place of your choosing in the memory of your loved one. It can be creating a scrapbook of pictures, small keepsakes etc. It can even be an online memorial, where you maintain a memorial page complete with images and geotagging of the final resting place. This helps to keep their memory alive and enable you to move forward.

9. Take up A Cause Consider getting involved in an activity

or a cause that the deceased loved. It could be a focus on a particular charity, environmental activities, a hobby they loved. Immersing yourself in it will allow you to share in a small part in their passions.

to let go and brave enough to step into each moment knowing your loved one is no more.

10.

Be Patient Most of all, give yourself time. Allow yourself to grieve. Allow yourself to forgive.

Give yourself time to heal. Be gentle and patient with yourself. Be brave enough

“May all the dearly departed persons that have gone on ahead of us continue to rest in peace.”

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THE GOLD IN THE GARBAGE PIT

By Virginia Muthoni

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hen one has been in solitude for a long

time as a coping mechanism, it takes insurmountable courage to express themselves; the thought of putting yourself out there, makes one feel very

vulnerable. Your mind tells you solitude is safe. However, what I have learnt in my journey towards healing is that fear for the unknown can be quite paralyzing. Whereas we cannot be ignorant of a harsh world that considers trolling a ‘thing’, healing actually begins when you take up courage to speak and rise above the shame, (*shaming the shame). | 44 | SHINE MAGAZINE | ISSUE 3 |

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he pain that has crippled us for years; the pain of childhood traumas that we have suppressed for years, cycles of rejection, betrayal, emotional abuse, physical abuse, death, grief, deep sorrow, struggling to find your sense of belonging, the awareness that you need to express yourself, but the very thought squeezes life out of you, when you remember how many times you’ve been misunderstood. All this feels like being buried in a heap of garbage. Yes, I visualize it like gold or treasure buried in a heap of garbage with no one willing to reach out and pull it out. But it reaches a point where you get so exhausted of the weight on your shoulders, it becomes suffocating. That’s when it

starts feeling like groping around in total darkness trying to find a switch, or being in a bottomless pit, trying to find a reed to hold on to and crawl out.

This is the critical point where you really need a support system to literally pull you out of the pit.

death as so peaceful...

You want to live but it all feels like unbearable pain. The most unfortunate thing is that the people around you seem to have no clue about what’s going on with you, they think you are just being petty or seeking sympathy.

They don’t realize you are on survival mode; every waking moment comes At this point, you’re so with excruciating pain; a tired that you imagine dagger like wound in the

The Curve

“The most unfortunate thing is that the people around you seem to have no clue about what’s going on with you, they think you are just being petty or seeking sympathy.” | ISSUE 3 | SHINE MAGAZINE | 45 |

chest. At this point you have probably exhibited some irrational behavior as your brain tries a coping mechanism to suppress the pain. The sad irony of life is that, when you need help, that’s when no one wants to be associated with you. No one wants to help this gold crawl out of the dirt or the heap of garbage they are buried in, and unless God in his love and mercies awakens and burdens people towards helping you, you are pretty much on your own. Sad, right? Yes. Depression is a very lonely place.

When people wrestling with depression, suicidal thoughts and death wishes attempt to open up, it’s not something they can adequately put into words; It is a whole mess on the inside, a storm, a hurricane, a whirlwind of thoughts, emotions and desires beyond human expression. So when they try to explain themselves, they are often viewed as needy, conniving, attention seeking, demanding, ill-intentioned or manipulative. In truth, they are

“When people wrestling with depression, suicidal thoughts and death wishes attempt to open up, it’s not something they can adequately put into words; It is a whole mess on the inside, a storm, a hurricane, a whirlwind of thoughts, emotions and desires beyond human expression.” and psychological wounds from childhood traumas, loss of my father prematurely and later the loss of my mum, then developing a lower back problem that affected my legs and nerves, hence subsequently affecting my daily life, (which I have been dealing with for the last three years). I thought I had just had enough of my own shares in life, but Nooo…; In my struggle to find healing, last year I The memory after years fell in very wrong hands, of bottling up emotional camouflaged as “A quickly running out of their internal coping strategies and are desperately groping about for someone, something called hope they can hold on to, so they can crawl out of the pit. When they are not able to find that someone, or if they are pushed away and ignored for long enough, they now completely isolate themselves and end it. I know that because I have been there.

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man of God”. That did it!

It cut off the last hold I had in life. At that time, I believed church is where you should find comfort, love and healing. So the deceit, betrayal and the manipulation that I suffered through this man, drove me over the edge and incapacitated me; psychologically, physically and emotionally. I went into severe depression; struggling with the mere basics of getting off the bed, or taking a shower.

I really wanted to die, I went to bed every night, asking God to take me.

Mornings were the most horrible, as I wondered why another day of pain had come.

“If only someone had seen the gold in him and help him out of the garbage pit, but unfortunately, the ones who could have done that, were probably the first to put him back in that garbage pit, every time he tried to crawl out.”

to walk this journey with me. As I said before; many whom I thought would understand actually left avoiding any association.

I groped in this darkness God sent me angels in for four months until God form of strangers. sent strangers/angels, who extended a hand of compassion and I started my therapy sessions. I will forever be grateful to God, and I am so humbled by Unfortunately, 22 years His mercies and love; He ago, my father didn’t get touched the hearts of such a chance; Instead strangers who bore my of enjoying the joy of a pain, saw my condition as little girl having a healthy it was, and without judge- bond with her father, I ment came to my rescue watched him dealing with

Missed Chance

the aftermath of rejection, his struggles with a sense of belonging and selfworth, sent him spiraling down to depression, then alcohol. Now I know that’s the only way he knew as a coping mechanism, I still remember when he was not drunk, how he would take a wooden seat and go to the same spot, just sit there, his arms crossed. He had this faraway look in his eyes and a sad face. I could tell he was hurting, I wanted to go sit at his feet and give him company, but it looked like he wanted to

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be left alone. When he was drunk he was a very jovial man; would put on this worship tape cassette and tell us to join him and sing along; his favorite song was “Momîrîirie, mûno marute andů, njîra ya muoyo ni mûtharaba”. Translated to mean that the disciples endured a lot of suffering, to teach us that the only way to everlasting life, is through the cross. Yes, this man was gold, a treasure hidden in pain. And through it all, he remained a very responsible father.

Sadly, I lost him prematurely at 40, where life, apparently begins. If only someone had seen the gold in him and help him out of the garbage pit, but unfortunately, the ones who could have done that, were probably the first to put him back in that garbage pit, every time he tried to crawl out. One of the reasons why people with deep emotional and psychological wounds take too long to heal, sometimes is because the people they meet in life or the people around them, do not know how to handle a flickering wick or a weak

reed. They lack the heart of Christ, who will never break a weak reed or put out a flickering light. (Isaiah 42:3, Matthew 12:20). So instead of shielding and nurturing them in an environment full of gentleness and protection, they push them, rough them up, mock them for being ‘weak,’ and dismiss them.

They meet people who count their wounded hearts as burdens they would rather not be associated with. They meet people who break them when they are weak, and tread all over them when they are broken.

They meet people who rubbish their pain and sarcastically tell them directly or indirectly to ‘man up,’ ‘get over it,’ or ‘grow up.’

The Pain People take physical wounds and sicknesses seriously, and one with an evident physical disease may be handled with some level of empathy and understanding. But when a person who’s battling emotional and psychological

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wounds and trauma tries to open up, they are treated as ‘attention seekers’ or people looking for a ‘pity party.’ Yet, their pain is valid and the internal, unseen damage is very real. More real than anyone can imagine. And as we draw closer to the end, with the love of many growing cold, (Mat. 24;10-12,) such wounded hearts are closing up more and more. When a heart has been dismissed and mishandled for being wounded long enough, it shuts down. And when a heart shuts down, unless God intervenes in His mercy, it begins to desire death. Thus the increased suicidal cases, even in the Church around the world, and so many people are struggling silently with the desire to end their lives. It’s only that they don’t have the guts, or at least that’s how they reason. But in reality, it is God who is holding them together.

(As God held me together). It is God who is keeping them from falling apart.

the depths of your soul and heal you. Most of all, I pray that the healing power of God will access the very core of who you are and uproot the very source of your incessant pain. May you be made every bit whole.

If you are in that place right now, I pray with everything in me for healers to be sent to you. For gifted hands, gifted with compassion and tenderness to access you and hold you, graced by God to access

Pastor Gakwandi; Founder of Hope Mentorship Program.

Thank you for walking this journey with me. Tears are rolling as I remember where we are coming from...Thank

And for everyone else out there, who probably have no idea what it’s like to handle someone who is struggling with deep emotional traumas and depression. Maybe you don’t even have any idea how to recognize one, just normalize kindness and love.

Avoid using harsh words and mockery. Extend grace even to those people you were about to write off based on their behavior, you never know the root cause of what they are dealing with. And believe you me, maybe what you consider irrational ‘behavior’ or even addictions, is a desperate out cry for help.

Appreciation

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you for the night calls, support. Meeting you was the questions nobody else divine. would ask “how are you feeling today”, “how are your emotions “. For giving me hope and telling me what you saw in me that Virginia Muthoni I couldn’t see when I was Ngugi is a woman after in so much pain... For your God’s own heart who patience. May God bless has received a second your kind heart. David, chance in life, and is Asha & Liz Mwende (My passionately pursusupport system); Thank ing her purpose in the you for being the angels Kingdom; To give hope that have held my hand. to the hopeless and And for allowing me to encourage the broken break down during those hearted calls. James Wetu, words fail me...May God bless you for your kindness and

About the Author

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“Pastor Gakwandi; Founder of Hope Mentorship Program.

Thank you for walking this journey with me.”

Eliminating Self-Limiting Beliefs

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t is a new year and what better way to begin the year by evaluating our belief system. In particular, any selflimiting beliefs that we may carry

and can potentially hold us back from achieving our goals in 2022. | ISSUE 3 | SHINE MAGAZINE | 51 |

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hat are self-limiting beliefs?

To p u t i t simply, self-limiting beliefs are untrue or wrong assumptions or perceptions that we hold about ourselves and about the way the world works.

These assumptions are “self-limiting” because in some way they hold us back from achieving what we are capable of!

Limiting beliefs have a way of creeping up on us slowly by slowly over the years and one must make a deliberate effort to be rid of them. The more we believe in these limits, the more they manifest in our lives, thus reconfirming to our minds that indeed these beliefs are true.

“...self-limiting beliefs are untrue or wrong assumptions or perceptions that we hold about ourselves and about the way the world works.” in our lives accordingly!

Stephen R. Covey explains this as the SEE-D0-GET cycle.

How we SEE things, influences what we DO and thus produces the results we GET.

“I do not have enough experience or qualifications”

Examples of such beliefs are: -

“I am not lucky like so and so”

“I am not good enough for X or Y” “Money is hard to come by”

“I can’t” “ I don’t have time” “I can’t manage” “Because of my background, I cannot be like “I am unworthy of success person Z” However, the opposite can because of my past mistakes” “Successful people come be true as well. If we change “Good things only happen to from rich families” our core beliefs to be positive other people but not to me” ones, then they will manifest “I am not (creative, | 52 | SHINE MAGAZINE | ISSUE 3 |

ambitious, successful, wealthy..etc) “I do not deserve to be happy” “I can’t because I am not……”

So, how can we eliminate such beliefs? By deliberately changing our mindsets, core beliefs and perspectives through a paradigm shift...a fundamental change in our approaches to life and underlying assumptions about ourselves! We literally need a new lens in which to see life.

Here is a practical way to scrutinize any limiting beliefs we may habor within ourselves.

Start by examining closely at least these 6 key areas below. Feel free to add on to any other area you wish to tackle.

• Goals & purpose e.g. I cannot be X because of X reason or I can never be X no matter how hard I try • Dreams & Aspirations e.g.

My dream to have X is not daily reminder. One can also possible because of X incorporate these into a daily morning routine (highly rec• Financial beliefs e.g. I ommended) by reciting the cannot earn or make X new affirmations in order to amount of money because reinforce them in the mind of x reason or money is and heart. never enough or I cannot afford X Let’s make deliberate efforts to rid ourselves of self-limit• Spiritual beliefs e.g. “No ing beliefs and we will indeed matter how much I pray experience a complete parabout x issue, God cannot adigm shift in our lives. All answer me” the best!

• Physical State e.g. “ I cannot be X because of my (weight, height, looks, size, colour etc) • Social/Emotional State e.g. “If I do X, I will be judged by the Society” or “I feel the way I do because of X and this cannot change” • Roles & responsibilities e.g. “I am not good enough as X because of X factor or reason” For every limiting belief listed, create a new positive affirmation that will lead to a paradigm shift. Meditate on it, repeat it and believe in it. Putting up a list of the new positive beliefs or affirmations on a wall where one can see them frequently is a great way of having a

About the Author

Victoria is a professional in the non-profit world, a published author and a personal development enthusiast.

“For every limiting belief listed, create a new positive affirmation that will lead to a paradigm shift.”

| ISSUE 3 | SHINE MAGAZINE | 53 |

MPISHI NYUMBANI

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CORN DOG RECIPE

corn dog is a sausage on a stick coated in a thick layer of cornmeal batter and deep-fried. The sausage used in a corn dog is usually the same types that are used in hot dogs. It is a popular type of fast food or street food.

Corn dogs originate from the United States in the 1920s. It is commonly found in American cuisine. They are found as a frozen food at most supermarkets.

Procedure INGREDIENTS: • Corn Dog Batter • Flour – 380g • Maize Meal – 50g • Salt – 14g • Sugar – 132g • Baking Powder – 6g • Eggs – 3pcs • Milk – 290ml

1. Mix the Dry ingredients together then the wet ingredients.

2. Combine the wet and dry ingredients into a smooth Batter 3. Place into a cup and skewer the Hot Dogs 4. You can coat the hotdog first by dusting in Flour.

5. Dip the Hot Dogs into the Batter Mixture.

6. Deep Fry in Hot Oil for 10-12minutes until Golden Brown 7. You can Serve with Baked Beans, Potato wedges or Fries, Ketchup, Mango Chutney etc.

8. Serve while Hot

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About the Author Nancy Odhiambo is a professionally qualified Chef and is the CEO of KANDY KORN KITCHEN

“WITH GREAT

POWER COMES GREAT RESPONSIBILITY.” | ISSUE 3 | SHINE MAGAZINE | 55 |

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G i r l s A s s o c i a t i o n ( M O G A )

Mugoiri Old Girls Association (MOGA) P. O. Box 20 10201 Kahuro, Muranga County Email: mugoirioldgirls@gmail.com Facebook page: Mugoiri old girl sassociation Join us in “GOING BACK AND GIVING BACK!”