Helpful Living Magazine Issue XIV

Copyright © 2023 Helpful Living Magazine

No portions of the publication can be transmitted, reproduced, or distributed in any form without contacting Founder Jamie Rockymore-Bess.

All articles have been reviewed and approved by Founder Jamie Rockymore-Bess. To contribute or to be interviewed contact info@helpfullivingmag.com

Disclaimer: Helpful Living Magazine does not take the place of therapy or any mental health services. Some articles and stories may be triggering. If you or someone you know has a mental health emergency please call 911 or go to your local emergency room.

LETTER FROM THE FOUNDER W

hen was the last time you put yourself on the schedule? Like seriously, put everything on halt for a day or a weekend to attend to your health and wellness? If you are like many busy parents or young adults, you probably cannot recall the last time you had a moment to yourself. Life be life’n and with all the busy schedules and high demands, putting yourself on the schedule can only get harder as you get older. Spending time alone is one of many things you ought to make a priority.

There are always reminders of how you can improve in something the moment you log onto social media. Each day I see ads for flatter tummies, hair growth, and clearer skin, which is a reminder to me that I want to change something about myself. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but when you start to see products back to back, you start to fall into the trap of wanting to FIX yourself at least that’s

all reality that is not how the world works. It’s nice to see a reel or Tik-Tok of someone’s success in a fast motion, however we attend to forget the challenges one faced to get the end result we see on social media. I wanted to point this out to anyone who feels as if they are stuck at some point in their life, despite what it is, I want you to know this… YOU ARE NOT ALONE.

One thing I want you to take in while you’re reading through this magazine issue is this: ACCOUNTABILITY. In order to heal or grow it’s important to acknowledge your part. What role did you play in the distant relationship you have with that family member or friend? How can you be accommodating or what challenges do you face when it comes to communication? We all have something we have to work on, and in the spirit of mental health awareness month, I want you to live a healthy and whole life, spiritually, physically, and mentally. Enjoy reading topics about relationships, understanding ways to pay for therapy, learning about burnout and what you can do about it.

We are also featuring our self-care boxes, a product you can use to engage in self-care practices independently. Be sure to check it out along with other wellness activities we have for you inside. I know this magazine issue is going to help you obtain some clarity about mental health. I am excited for your growth and be sure to know, I am rooting for you.

Jamie Rockymore-Bess Founder, Helpful Living Magazine

The Artist On The Cover

Sherita T. Sparrow is a Wilmington, Delaware native who has been inspired by art since the tender age of five. Throughout grade school, she cultivated her talent and earned a Bachelors of Science Degree in Art from Towson University and a Graphic Design Degree from Delaware College of Art & Design. Shortly afterwards, she founded The Feather’s Touch, LLC a holistic art company that uses art to heal the world emotionally and spiritually so that it’s a much better place. Initially, services focused on using art holistically to enhance the quality of life of elders living in nursing homes.

Now, services extend to empowering the youth. Sherita teaches 11-18-year-olds how

beauty within themselves through art. When days are quiet and warm, Sherita enjoys sitting outside to create mixed media art with acrylics, chalk pastels, and magazine clippings on canvas. Through her art, she explores what the world is missing amidst mistrust, racism, and ambiguity and seeks her work walk away feeling uplifted and inspired to contribute to something greater than themselves. As she states, “My journey certainly has had a few series of events that tested my faith. Yet, art offers me a sense

all of it, and this is what I strive to help others to find, too.” Go to www. thefeatherstouch.com to learn more about the creative services available to you!

Painting Description:

“Healing Just Ahead” is a 16 x 20 acrylic painting of an empty park bench floating in the middle of the ocean. The bench represents a sense of loneliness and hopelessness. The untamed ocean embodies years of suppressed thoughts and trauma that keeps one anchored in an emotional storm. Yet, the road ahead shows us that a brighter future awaits. And Helpful Living Magazine (characterized by the pelican) is here to support you on the path toward healing and greater peace of mind.

I challenge you to...

Take time to absorb the vivid colors, shapes, and symbols of the painting. What does it convey to you? In what way do you choose to face hardship and show yourself love when “life” happens?

“Our greatest personal —

Gayle Lynn Goodwin

Joker

By Steven D. Kish

My sinister chuckles are heard by everyone…. Ha-ha-ha. I am the Joker; I’m surrounded by my 52 friends. Sometimes I’m there to shake things up, which I always do.

Other times I’m there to be wild, which I was born to do. I am unpredictable and come out of nowhere. Sometimes I’m not even in the game. Remember, I am the Joker.

I can blend in with my friends and pretend to be someone else.

I stroke your ego and can be whoever you want me to be. If you want, I can make the game more serious.

I can make it more fun.

Ha-ha-ha…. I’m not laughing at you. Just the opposite.

You’re laughing at me!

The reality of my life is the hidden joke.

Most of the time, I’m not even in the game. I live a life of isolation, rarely seeing the light of day. into the game.

Am I really wild or just depraved?

I’ve heard the names I’ve been called: uncontrollable, chaotic, and untamed.

Why am I so unwanted?

Is it because I yell and always catch you off guard?

I was born into chaos, and chaos is my destiny. Think about it…Maybe it’s you or my 52 friends who are the real Jokers.

I accept what I am, but why am I the one who must be alone?

Just because I am a standout, it doesn’t mean I like it. Do you play with me for your amusement, or am I just a sick joke?

Steven Dee Kish is an internationally published poet with over thirty poems published in Australia, UK, India, and the United States. His writing shows what life is like when someone lives on the razor edge of life. In life, there are times when one needs to address the elephant in the room, and Steven’s writing gives the reader a glimpse into that process. Steven bears his soul and hopes to provide hope to those hurting. Steven is passionate about mental health and is the senior editor for the arts and culture section of a mental health website called Gainlove.life. Steven loves the spoken word, and his YouTube channel: Address the elephant in the room poems gives the audience a visual to complement his powerful spoken word.

To Pay or Not To Pay: A Brief Look into the Cost of Therapy

By Ashley D. Gilmore, LCMHC

An anonymous social media post:

Her: “The cost of therapy should not create more anxiety.”

Them: “Right. Because they are tripping with these prices!”

On social media, there often seems to be a debate on why mental health services are so expensive. Many tweets, memes, and posts give opinions and thoughts on the unaffordability of therapy.

As a therapist- these feelings always beg the question..well- how am I supposed to feed my family if I only charge $50 per session when gas prices are $3.39 per gallon, insurance rates are rising and

blue check (I don’t have one, but you get the idea). I think it is important to break the down the cost of therapy and provide support around your investment in therapeutic services.

Ok. Here goes.

Before your therapist became your mental health provider, they were a student obtaining a master’s degree in the counseling or social work field. Their degree most likely cost them $70-$90,000 for three years. During their program, most soon-to-be-therapists must participate in an unpaid practicum and internship

in the state for which they desire to work. This often comes prevents the student from being able to work full-time, therefore reducing any income they could be receiving. And then… they graduate! Yay! However, in order to become a licensed

(insert their respective mental health provider title here), they must sit for at least one qualifying exam. There is limited research on the complete cost of preparation and fees affiliated with the exams but it is safe to say that for many national examinations, the costs range from $275 to $485. Per exam. If your mental health provider is successful in passing their exam, they then must submit an application packet to their state board which totals approximately $375. This is a rough estimate and varies per state, based on the documents needed. After passing their exam and being licensed in their state, your mental health provider then must have annual malpractice insurance and participate in continuing education classes to maintain their license and to keep up with current research so that they are better equipped to serve you.

Whew! Is it safe to say you may have a better understanding of why your mental health may charge over $100 for their time? The cost of therapy may seem expensive, but at what cost to the mental health provider?

According to the Market Intelligence Report (2020), spending for mental health services in the United States has increased by 52.1% which means that services are indeed becoming more costly for those needing therapy. One solution I encourage is for clients (or potential clients) to learn about their health care insurance and the benefits of health services as a way to make therapy more cost effective. The Paul Wellstone and Pete Domenici Mental Health Parity and Addiction Act of 2008 (MHPAEA) is a federal law that prohibits insurance companies from limiting mental health services. What is difficult, is that insurance is a tricky game and sets their priorities on the money, not the service or care provided. Insurance companies often do not make it easy for the mental health provider or the client. And because of this,

some mental health providers offer a sliding scale that may accommodate your budget. If you are struggling to pay for your mental health services, be sure to voice that- your mental health provider is human and empathizes with you.

Here is your take away: Mental health providers are people too and must sustain themselves, save some money and pay back student loans. We are also health care providers. Not doctors however, but our skill and care for our clients saves lives the same. Either way, your investment in your mental health (emotionally and

Ashley is a Licensed Clinical Mental Health Counselor and National Board-

of Gilmore Counseling and Consulting Services, PLLC. Ashley works to educate, inspire and elevate individuals, families, groups and organizations toward emotional and mental wellness. She has obtained degrees from Purdue, Indiana and Capella University. She is a wife and mother, an advocate for self-care and the uplifting of the African American Community.

About Ashley D. Gilmore, LCMHC:

A Maternal Mothers Bond

With Tamara Mackroy

Tamara (Tam) Mackroy is an advocate, public speaker, and a change agent missionary. She is known for being a headstrong transaction strategy and execution leader in the Central Florida community with ties across the United States. Tam holds multiple degrees, with the highest being her MS in Human Services with a Concentration in Social Policy, Analysis and Planning. She is certified in Project Management Essentials and is Lean Six Sigma Yellow Belt certified. Tam also holds and is working her way through an Addiction Counseling program. Tam is the owner and Chief Program Project Management Consultant for Management and Consultative Favor, LLC. In her role, she works with Human Services across the country in helping them develop and implement strengthened business operations to further push their organizational missions of being able to help those living in local neighborhoods. She is the Founder and President of Maternal Matters Favored, a 501c3 organization. The mission is to provide support services to women that are suffering from reproductive health issues and or perinatal/postpartum depression and or anxiety.

Lastly, she is Principal Partner and CEO of Favorable Human Services Solutions. This agency was created specifically to aid those who are released from jail and or prison obtain services that serve as a catalyst to re-entering society. Services include mental health and substance use counseling, job

few. As a Principal Partner and the Chief Compliance Officer of Nasir Logistics Dispatching, Tam works with the other C-Level leaders to ensure that the nationwide supply chain management

Tamara Mackroy

time?

TM: First time parents should remember to breathe! We are not super-humans. It’s important to provide the basics to a child and to take what little time that can be salvaged during the day/week for self. If possible to resource family, friends and community programs that will serve as a go-to for being able to catch up on sleep, cleaning, etc. During prenatal appointments, they should ask if there are Doulas services available that they qualify for and or if there’s a program that offers it.

TM: Most mothers/non birthing parents with multiple children tend to go through high levels of anxiety, depression and even OCD. Statistics show that parenting multiple children can lead to minimal

or no personal time, constant tiredness, and irritability. The numbers are higher depending on the socio-economic level of the household.

Tamara Mackroy

TM: In these present days and times, parents should not feel like asking for help is a burden. Societal norms have placed high expectations on mothers specifically to be in control of their emotions, nurture a child, and contribute to the household’s stability. When the burdens of these 3 elements are off kilter society will eventually reap the emotions that were internalized by the parent. Meaning, a parent may fall prey to mental health disorders, substance use, raise a child who is traumatized and who may even repeat generational dysfunctionalities; and so much more.

have no one to help them?

TM: Reach out to someone they trust to let them know how they are feeling, what they are going through and to ask for help. Ailments of perinatal and postpartum mood disorders if not treated can spiral into depths of turmoil.

- Tamara Mackroy

HL: How important is it to join a support group, what are some

TM: It’s very important for folks to be in support groups. We as humans need a tribe we can offload life’s challenges with. There has been great success with support groups as seen through AA/ NA groups, grief support groups, and even caregiver support groups. The goal of support groups is to help a person cope. Being able to navigate parenthood and life is a lot and parents should know that they do not have to stuff their emotions in.

TM: In 2002 I went through perinatal anxiety that spiraled into postpartum anxiety and depression. Back then conversations about how I was psychologically coping with becoming a new parent, my home life, etc. was not a thing. Not for a person of color. Postpartum anxiety and depression lead me to a life of drugs, prostituting, being in and out of rehabs and jails. It took several years before I was able to reestablish myself in society, regain custody of my son, and reinvent myself.

create Board development opportunities, and seek donors to say the least.

We were recently added to the directory for Orlando Health-South Seminole Behavioral Health unit’s resource list as an organization for those who are released from being Baker-Acted and were diagnosed with a perinatal or postpartum mood disorder. We have a continued partnership with the Eatonville Chamber of Commerce that sponsored our incorporation and we were just added to PSI’s Peer Consultation Groups directory. We are working on being added to NAMI’s resource directory to be a staple in the Black and Brown community that is combating perinatal and postpartum mood disorders.

Mental Moment: There’s no manual to parenting. All we can do is live life 1 day at a time!

About Tamara Mackroy:

TM: In December of 2022 we were awarded a scholarship for the this program I am able to connect with other nonprofit organizations as we learn how to build our programs’ capacity,

Tamara is a member of the Seminole County Chapter for the NAACP and newly elected Prison Committee Chair. She is a Women Empowerment Specialist for Wombversity. She is a member of the FL Rising-State Leadership Council and the Eatonville Chamber of Commerce. Tamara is a Central FL Legislative Liaison for the National Alopecia Areata Foundation and a Board Member for the Central FL Alopecia Support Group. She is a Board of Directors member and the Governance Committee Chair for the Center for Independent Living. She is a Mentor for Postpartum Support International and is a Peer Specialist. Tamara sat on the SemDems Diversity Inclusion Committee and is their Outgoing Secretary. She is the Past President for the National Organization for Women-Seminole County Chapter and the Past Co-Chair, for the Alzheimer’s Association (Central & North Florida Chapter) The Longest Day Committee.

DO YOU WANT TO ENGAGE IN SELF-CARE BUT HAVE NO IDEA ON WHAT TO DO?

Self-Care Helpful Living Toolkits are designed with you in mind to help with your self-care needs. Indulge in our toolkits and explore how to put yourself

to focus on yourself, especially during those mental health days.

Explore creating a vision for your mental health by getting creative with your toolkit. Enjoy the activities with friends or independently with music to get your creative mind flowing.

Understanding Different Types Of Anxiety Disorders

By Stan Popovich

Fharm. For those with anxiety disorders, however, even the most mundane things can feel like a threat, triggering an out-of-proportion fear response that negatively affects their lives. With the help of professional guidance, anxiety books, and other tools, however, a person can learn to manage and overcome their fears.

Symptoms Of Anxiety

Common symptoms of anxiety include the following:

Persistent nervousness and worry that crowds out other thoughts

Notable physical symptoms like shakiness, sweating, increased heart rate, or rapid breathing

Restlessness (having trouble sitting still, shaking your leg, etc.)

Feeling exhausted all the time

A nagging sense that something bad is about to happen

Avoiding situations that make you anxious, even at the cost of relationships and opportunities

Types Of Anxiety Disorders

Anxiety can manifest in a variety of forms for a variety of reasons, both genetic and environmental. Over just a few examples of known disorders.

Generalized Anxiety Disorder

anxiety is out of proportion to the situations, and it can seem to others that someone is worrying for no it go.”

Generalized anxiety affects a person on a daily basis and can make even ordinary tasks difficult and exhausting to handle. It is often concurrent with other diagnoses, such as depression or other anxiety disorders.

Social Anxiety Disorder

Social anxiety involves intense fear and avoidance of social situations. A person with this disorder may avoid various social interactions and events because they are afraid that they will be judged, laughed at, or disliked by other people.

Most people can understand being nervous to give a speech or meet new people, but the self-consciousness of social anxiety affects a person’s ability to live a healthy, productive life. Even seemingly small tasks like making a phone call can be so terrifying that they will avoid it at all costs and may panic if forced to do so.

Separation Anxiety Disorder

This disorder is unique from others in that it is primarily seen during childhood. For children with separation anxiety, being separated from parents, guardians, or other parent-like figures leads to excessive fear and distress. While it is normal for a child to be somewhat upset when they are separated from caregivers, children with this disorder show anxiety beyond what is considered healthy for their developmental level.

Though it is not as common as childhood separation anxiety, adults may also be diagnosed with this disorder if they show extreme distress when separated from a certain person or pet. Adult separation anxiety behavior can appear controlling— needing to know where a spouse is at all times, constantly checking in—but, at its core, it is about uncontrollable fear.

Panic Disorder

Unlike other anxiety disorders that involve a constant level of fear or worry throughout the day, panic disorder is marked by episodes of fast-spiking anxiety known as panic attacks. A person can reach the peak of panic within minutes after being triggered, experiencing symptoms of extreme terror, irregular heartbeat, chest pain, and more.

A person with a panic disorder may develop a fear of situations in which they may experience a panic attack. As they begin to avoid more and more potentially triggering situations, it can severely limit their ability to function and lead healthy lives.

Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder

Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) involves a cycle of obsessive thoughts that sufferers attempt to satisfy with compulsive behaviors. Thoughts vary, but common fears include contamination by germs, losing control, being harmed, or seeing loved ones harmed. In an attempt to quiet the thoughts, a person will perform compulsive actions, such as washing their hands five times in a row or checking a locked door several times.

Someone without OCD may double-check things, but they are usually able to move on quickly. A person with OCD may spend an entire day washing and re-washing dishes because the thoughts will not stop. Compulsing is often the only way they know to temporarily calm their minds.

Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder

Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) is a disorder that develops after a person has experienced or seen a traumatic event. The terror is so powerful that it causes the person to have persistent anxiety, nightmares, and vivid flashbacks that can seem very real. It’s normal for people to struggle temporarily after trauma, but a person with PTSD will continue to have daily symptoms for months or years.

PTSD is well-known for its incidence among military veterans, but it can be caused by

to a person. Examples include things like abuse, assault, natural disasters, and terrorist attacks.

Agoraphobia

Agoraphobia is a unique anxiety disorder that involves an extreme fear of any situation from which the person worries there might not be a clear escape. The idea of leaving home, being in a crowd of people, or entering an enclosed space can create intense anxiety as they begin to worry that they will be trapped or embarrassed. If possible, they will avoid the situation or take a companion with them for comfort.

Most people have times where they are temporarily hesitant to go out or be seen by others—like a teenager afraid to let anyone see her first pimple. A person with agoraphobia, however, experiences persistent, out-of-proportion fear and

avoidant behaviors for six months or more. In severe cases, a person may avoid leaving the house entirely.

Other Specific Phobias

an intense, uncontrollable fear of a certain type of object, person, or situation. Unlike a standard fear or dislike of something, a phobia seriously affects a person’s day-today function and can cause extreme anxiety even in seemingly safe situations.

Someone with a typical fear of spiders may scream when they see one, but they are otherwise able to lead a normal life. A person with a phobia of spiders, on the other hand, might avoid unfamiliar places and situations due to the overwhelming fear that they may encounter a spider.

Start Overcoming Anxiety Immediately With Real, Commonsense Advice

If you struggle with fear, you’ve probably already heard plenty of well-intended-butdisappointing advice from loved ones and typical anxiety self-help books. I hope this information helps bring clarity, however it is also important to seek a mental health specialist to gain tools and have conversations on the next steps to take.

About Stan Popovich:

Stan Popovich is the author of the popular managing fear book, “A Layman’s Guide to Managing Fear”. For more information about Stan’s book and to get some more free mental health advice, please visit Stan’s website at managingfear.com.