Body Shaming

接受自己，丢掉羞愧

Written by ( 作者 ): Elizabeth Soria Photos by ( 图片来源 ): BigStock

Imagine walking into a store where people point at you, making rude comments about your appearance, saying you are either “too fat” or “too skinny,” and they recommend that you lose weight, or eat more. Then, the salesclerk laughs in your face, tells you that they do not carry your size because they only cater to the “perfect size.”

Since when did being too thin become the standard of beauty? If you look within the confines of history, women who were curvier were once seen as beautiful and healthy. Fashion trends and times change, but the obsession to look perfect has always been a struggle for many people. Young adolescents all over the world struggle to look like the models and celebrities glossing the magazine covers, TV screens, billboards, movie screens, magazine spreads, and visual media that permeate our daily lives. As a result, many young people and adults develop eating disorders known as bulimia and anorexia, so it goes that calling someone “too fat” or “too skinny” is extremely rude and insensitive.

Thin or fat shaming and criticizing another’s appearance is completely judgmental and uncalled for, so why do it? The media is not entirely at fault or to blame for such occurrences. The education, morals, and upbringing of such issues starts at home with parents or parental guardians. We cannot choose what we look like, or how our bodies develop during adolescence, as genetics, health, and every body type differs from individual to individual. There are numerous factors to consider, some of them could be health issues. Not everyone can process certain foods and still others have trouble losing weight due to a variety of (personal) medical histories.

I have crossed paths with many people in China (and other regions in the world) who think that a person’s body defines who they are; superficiality trumps the character of a person. Never have I seen such an obsession with being thin. It’s so prevalent that it’s disturbing. Age and beauty can quickly wither away. Beauty enhancements, diets, and surgery will only work temporarily, and after all your youthful years have passed, what have you got to show for it? Many women (such as myself) and men have struggled for a long time with body image. We have learned to love and accept our bodies as we are, but when people make gross or rude judgments about our appearances and call us “fat,” “strong,” (the equivalent of fat in China), or “elephants” or any other derogatory terms, it is not funny, it is verbal bullying and it HAS TO STOP! Children need to be taught at home that being healthy is important, and people all over the world have different physical features, with varying body shapes, sizes, and appearances; we should accept all body types without making blatant, harsh or rude comments.

Whether a person is too fat, too thin, or needs to lose weight, be healthy, put on makeup, or what he or she should or should not be in society’s eyes or in the eyes of their

peers is nobody’s business. Each individual is responsible for himself or herself. As for your body, do not allow yourself to be brainwashed by years of others telling you what you need. Think only loving thoughts about your body and what it is capable of doing, it is a miraculous living organism; you are an amazing and wonderful human being! What people will remember you for are your words, actions, and the legacy that you leave behind, not for your size. So, the next time you want to berate yourself for not fitting into your jeans or that favorite shirt or dress, think about this: what you are and who you are is defined by your character. Nobody can take your power away, only if you allow them to take away your self-confidence and your inner peace.

设想一下，当你走进一家服装店，里面的人 指着你，对你的外貌作出粗俗的评价，不是说 你太胖，就是说你太瘦，并且建议你减肥或增 肥。之后，售货员会当面嘲笑你，告诉你这里 的衣服没有你的尺码，因为它们只为迎合完美 身材。

自什么时候起骨瘦如柴成了美的标准？如 果你回顾历史，胖女子也曾被看作是迷人、健 康的。潮流趋势随着时代改变了，但对完美外 表的追求一直是很多人的奋斗目标。全世界的 青少年都在争相让自己像杂志封面上、电视荧 屏上、广告牌上、电影荧幕上、杂志拉页上和 视觉媒体上的模特和名人那样光鲜亮丽。最 终，一些青少年和成人的饮食变得不规律，继 而患上易俄病和厌食症。因此，称某人“胖子” 或“皮包骨”是极其粗鲁和麻木不仁的。 以瘦或胖来嘲笑或评价他人的外表是极 度挑剔和无礼的，可是为什么会这样呢？对于 此类事件，媒体并不需要担全责。这种教育、 道德和修养始于家庭中的父母或监护人。我们 既无法选择自己的长相，也无法选择在青少年 时期我们的身体发展趋势，因为每个个体的基 因、健康状况和体型都是不同的。有许多因素 需要考虑，其中包括健康问题。并不是所有人 都能消化特定的食物，也有一些人由于各种病 史使减肥变得极其困难。 在中国（和世界其他地区）， 我遇到过很多人，他们认为一个 人的长相表明了他是个什么样的 人；一个人的外在胜过他的品 性。我从未见过有什么比身材纤 瘦更让人执迷的，这种态度是如 此盛行以致于令人苦恼。年龄和 美貌很快就会消逝。美容、节食 The Prevalence of Body Shaming 和整形手术的效果都是暂时的， 毕竟你的青春会逝去，你还有什 身材自卑的盛行 么资本呢？ 许多女人（比如我）和男人 与身体意象抗争了很长时间。我 们已经学会去爱和接受我们原 本的样子，但是，当人们对我们的外貌作出恶 劣或粗俗的评价，用“胖”、“壮”（在中国壮等 同于胖）、“大象”或其他贬义词来形容我们 时，事情并不有趣，这种言语欺凌必须停止！ 在家里，父母应该告诉孩子保持健康的重要 性，世界各地的人生理特征不同，有各种身形、 体态和长相。我们应该接受所有的体型，而不 是公然作出苛刻或粗俗的评价。 无论一个人或胖或瘦，需不需要减肥，健 康与否，有无化妆，在世俗标准中应该或不应 该如何，都与他人都无关。每个个体只对他或 她自己负责。至于你的身体，不要被别人洗 脑，不要让别人来告诉你你需要什么，只对身 体进行积极的思考，想想它的各种功能。它是 一个神奇的生物体，你是一个不可思议的奇妙 的人类。 人们只会记住你的言语、行为以及你留下 的遗产，而不是你的体型。所以，如果下次你 因为穿不下喜爱的牛仔裤、衬衫或连衣裙而自 责，想想看：你是什么样的人由你的性格决 定。没有人能夺走你内心的力量，除非你允许 他们动摇你的自信和内在平和。