Feature: Andrew Reed Lecture

Resilience in the 21st Century

Alex van Holk (Blathwayt 2002) delivers a moving and thought-provoking address at the 2017 Andrew Reed Lecture

The first of the Andrew Reed Lecture Series took place back in the 1990s; the aim was to invite eminent speakers to give an address primarily on the subject of the under-privileged, honouring the work of our Founder. Previous speakers included experts such as Lord Judd, Chief Executive of Oxfam, Professor Bhiku Parekh, a world authority on Mahatma Ghandi and Mrs Anita Lasker-Wallfisch, a concentration camp survivor and gifted musician.

Rolling forward 25 years... we felt the time was right to reinstate this annual Lecture Series, with a slightly modern update. Given the uncertainty of our times, Andrew Reed’s ethos and vision – in so many areas of social reform – are more relevant now than ever. So we wanted to broaden the series’ remit to reflect all the qualities that Rev. Dr Reed stood for, elements that now form the bedrock of the School’s six values: integrity, compassion, curiosity, responsibility, resilience and independence.

For us, to have an Old Reedonian ‘kick-start’ the new series was important and so, when we were looking for a speaker to talk about resilience in particular, we knew instinctively that within our ‘own ranks’, we had an Old Reedonian who very clearly exemplified this quality. We were delighted when Alex said yes! Anyone who was at School at the same time as Alex would remember him for all sorts of positive reasons but, for a new generation of pupils, parents, staff, governors and invited guests, it was always going to be a poignant evening hearing his story and how it shaped him and those around him.

As an exceptional sportsman and academic, Alex always pushed the boundaries when at School, whether that was on the hockey pitch or in an Economics lesson! His philosophy was to live life to the fullest. So, aged 17, when he was invited to holiday with a former classmate at Reed’s in France over Christmas in 2000, he jumped at the chance.

Being driven by one of his friends, Alex described the moment he saw their car rapidly approaching a huge lorry before swerving off the road to avoid a collision. The next thing he remembered was lying in the verge on top of a tree and feeling nothing from his waist down. Alex was paralysed.

After several weeks in hospital, he was bored. He wanted to get back to some normality and, despite going against all his doctors’ orders, he returned to school after just two months. In his speech, Alex paid tribute to the then Chair of Governors; the Headmaster, David Jarrett (who was in the audience); the staff and, of course,

I was truly moved by Alex; what an amazing story of resilience and determination against such trauma and devastation. I know my son, who has had to face adversity in his life, would be inspired to see that you don’t give up but keep going and see what you can achieve.

Current parent

his friends, saying that returning to Reed’s after his rehabilitation and being given all the outstanding support academically, practically, pastorally and emotionally was a pivotal moment: it was then that he realised he could get on with the rest of his life: get his A Levels, go to university and fulfil his ambition of a career in banking.

However, as if this weren’t test enough for Alex and his family, in a tragic set of circumstances, just a few months later, his younger brother Bram, also a Reedonian, was killed by a car when crossing a road on a family holiday.

At this point in the evening, all eyes fell on Alex’s parents – Elske and Bart – who, along with his youngest sister, had so bravely come along to support their son. One’s immediate reaction was to try to understand how one copes with and come through such devastating and life-shattering events?

In trying to answer this, Alex put it down to a ‘sense of community’. A community of family, a community of school, a community of friends – each a group with shared grief, shared values, shared qualities and a shared sense of purpose that helped him get through. Of course, without the strength of his family and the resilience that came from them, as well as from his own character, he would have been nowhere. a Vice President of Morgan Stanley and happily married to Luise in 2012, after being inspired by the London Paralympic rowing, he decided he wanted to take up sport again! With no previous rowing experience, he juggled a demanding job with an unrelenting training schedule, and at the 2015 World Championships, through sheer determination, Alex qualified to row for The Netherlands at the 2016 Rio Paralympics. After narrowly missing out on the A final, he came first in the B final. Quite outstanding!

So what did the audience learn that night from such an honest and moving address? Well, Alex concluded his speech by reflecting on how the School’s values continue to play a key part in his life. He has learnt through his own circumstances the importance: of compassion, both giving and – just as importantly – receiving; taking full responsibility for your deeds and actions whatever the outcome; demonstrating integrity to lead a positive life and, of course, showing resilience regarding what life throws at you – a quality he has in abundance.

As Shahin Baghaei, our 2002 School Captain and great friend of Alex, said in his vote of thanks at the end of the evening, Andrew Reed would have been more than honoured that such an inspirational man as Alex delivered a Lecture in his name about resilience, a key trait that both gentlemen share.

To end on a quote from Alex would seem appropriate: ‘Live up to the values of the School, use them to embrace life and enjoy the ride!’

Thank you Alex for sharing your story with us with the same candidness you would have if we were back at school talking among friends. Your courage and the strength of your family during that period was not only an inspiration to me personally but touched the lives of every single pupil, teacher and parent across the School. On behalf of everyone that you have inspired and continue to inspire, thank you.

Extract from Shahin Baghaei’s thank you address