20 minute read
In Memoriam
Tributes to ORs and friends whose deaths we have sadly learned about this year
Oli Doyle (Mullens 2017)
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August 1991 to September 2016 We were so sad to receive the news that Oli had passed away suddenly and unexpectedly. To remember him, we held a special Chapel service conducted by our Chaplain, Rev. Andrew Winter with special memories shared by Alex Balls (see OR Events and Reunions section).
Derek Pulleyn
April 1950 to April 2017 Although not an Old Reedonian, we thought that many ORs would want to know that sadly Derek Pulleyn passed away in April 2017. Derek was a formidable force for many years within the Reed’s hockey coaching team, as well as being the Deputy Head at Parkside School.
Norman Alvey (Blathwayt 1938)
May 1922 to December 2016 Norman was born in Teddington on the 20th May 1922. His brother John (Blathwayt 1940) was born three years later.
Their father died when Norman was seven and his mother sent him to the London Orphan School in Watford. Norman was very unhappy to begin with but, gradually settled in. In later life he was always appreciative of the sound foundation and education that he had received there and remained in touch for the rest of his life.
Whilst at school, Norman played rugby and was proud of gaining his colours, a small cap with a tassel. However, he was better at cross country, winning the school championship in 1937 and 1938 (his winning trophies can be found in the Archive Room). He later joined the Surrey Athletic Club.
Norman left school at 16 and went to a technical school to study for the Civil Service examination. He passed and went to work at the Ministry of Agriculture, cycling from home in Kingston to the city.
During WWII Norman joined the Fleet Air Arm and served as a radio mechanic on escort carriers. He served on HMS Tracker, part of Escort Group 2, accompanying convoys across the Atlantic. In 1944 he served on HMS Chaser on Arctic Convoy JW57 to the Kola inlet near Murmansk, Russia. This trip enabled him to become a member of the Russian Convoy Club in 1998 and he joined them for the Remembrance Day march past the Cenotaph.
On being demobbed in 1946 he returned to the Civil Service in the Ministry of Town and Country Planning. However, in 1950 he decided to move into horticulture. At one point he was employed at Hampton Court where his job included trimming the famous maze.
A few years later Norman moved to the John Innes Institute, then in Bayfordbury, near Hertford, where he became a research scientist. At the same time he studied for the Institute of Statisticians examinations. While there he met and married Diane in 1956.
In 1966 he moved with his wife and son, Ian, to Harpenden where he worked as a statistician at Rothamsted Research Station until his retirement in 1982. Then for a few years he worked part time as a statistician for the Consumer Association, or Which?, as it is better known.
Apart from work Norman had many outside interests, mainly gardening – particularly growing vegetables – and history. In 1978 he joined the Architectural and Archaeological Society of St Albans where he took on active roles in the local history section, including being chairman for four years. At the same time he was a founder member of the British Association for Local History (BALH) and was the treasurer from 1985 to 1992 and a trustee until well into the 21st Century.
Norman enjoyed writing and had articles on both WWI and WWII, including his own war memoir blog; short radio talks; booklets on Reed’s School and Charity Legislation; and articles for various history society magazines published.
In his 80s Norman joined the Harpenden Writers Group which he thoroughly enjoyed and where he made many friends. Until a few months before his death he enjoyed entering the competitions and contributing to the read arounds. Memories of school life and his other experiences often played a part in his writings.
Norman died in early December 2016 in Watford General Hospital as a result of a fall, when he fractured his thigh, followed by a stroke.
Ian Alvey, son of Norman
Peter (‘Boris’) John Courtney
August 1940 to September 2000 Peter Courtney passed away on 30th September 2000 after a short illness. Peter was born on 17th August 1940 in Henley on Thames. One of three children, his father died when he was an infant, leaving his mother to cope with a young family.
Peter attended Trinity School in Henley on Thames until 1949, before moving to Reed’s School where he was educated until 1955. Peter left school to join the Royal Navy in 1956 where he served on board HMS Fearless and HMS Afrikaans as a Radio Operator.
Peter met his wife Jean whilst stationed in Simon’s Town, South Africa. They were married in 1960 and continued to live in Cape Town until 1963 when they returned to Henley on Thames with a young daughter, Elaine. Their second child, Patrick, was born in 1966.
Peter left the Royal Navy in 1967, joining the Foreign Broadcasting Information Service as a Telecoms Operator based at Caversham Park, Reading. Dedication and professionalism awarded him swift promotion, leading his team until illness forced an early retirement. His work with the FBIS took him regularly to the USA, Japan and Athens.
He loved Henley on Thames dearly. Often found walking beside the River with a camera at the ready, sometimes at 5am to catch the sun rise over Marsh Lock. Peter was an active member of The Henley Photographic Club.
A great lover of the outdoors, Peter liked to walk, taking his children through the local villages of Binfield Heath, Shiplake and Harpsden all in one afternoon. Given better health, he would have followed the same paths with his three grandchildren.
Peter had a deep love for music, from Van Morrison to Classical and Jazz. Peter would listen to his vast collection of music, headphones on, oblivious to the world. Peter was a family man, a very loving, supportive and caring man; just three days before he died, he and Jean celebrated their 40th wedding anniversary.
Peter was a listener, supportive to those around him and a man who would do anything for anyone he knew. He was always on hand to offer sound advice and guidance. He adored his wife Jean and was proud to have such a caring and loving family around him.
The days out with his grandchildren, talk of West Ham United, his fascination with the Grand Prix, Billy Connolly, the birthday celebrations, the bedtime stories and celebrating the new Millennium with his family, Peter lived a wonderfully rich and fulfilling life and was an inspiration to many people.
To the end of Peter’s life, he was a very proud, smart, brave and very courageous family man, so dearly loved and now so sadly missed.
Leslie MacArthur (Blathwayt 1944)
June 1928 to June 2016 My brother Leslie died in Ottawa on 30 June, a week after his 88th birthday. Six years older than me, he was a contemporary of some of those whose obituaries were in the 2016 edition of The Reeder. It’s that time of life!
Leslie left the school at Totnes in 1944, when he was 16, after School Certificate. He started at once on an apprenticeship with Yarrows on the Clyde (Sir Harold Yarrow had sponsored him when he joined the then London Orphan Asylum in Watford) living with our father’s family in Glasgow. With a break of 27 months National Service (he was one of those whose service was extended by three months in 1948 at the time of the Berlin crisis and the Air Lift) he completed his five-year apprenticeship.
In September 1952 he married Elsie Scott, the daughter of a Lanarkshire farmer, and they lived in Glasgow. He went to sea for quite long spells as 4th, 3rd, 2nd and finally Chief Engineer over a period of about 10 years, on cargo and passenger ships, while his four children arrived and grew up in a new house in Glasgow. After a few months in a “shore job” with Lloyds, he emigrated to Canada to join the Coastguard Service. The family lived for eight years in Newfoundland before moving to Ottawa, where the children grew up and the daughters married. For some years he and his wife lived in Toronto, where he continued his responsibilities for shipping in the Great Lakes and the St
Lawrence Seaway. Finally he moved to Ottawa again, firstly with the Department of Transport and then from 1986 with the Canadian Shipowners’ Association. He retired from CSA in 1991 but remained in Ottawa until his death.
Leslie had a burgeoning family: four children, seven grandchildren and, at the time of his death, nine great grandchildren, surely with more to come. From the time he moved to Toronto, sailing was a major pastime, especially amongst the Thousand Islands on the Seaway when he moved to Ottawa. Golf was another leisure activity, which we both shared – in Ottawa, Britain and South Carolina during Ottawa winters. In 1989 his wife Elsie died but, the following year, he married Kathleen Smith, Canadian born and bred and, after cancer also took her away he married Elizabeth Milne, who survives him. His latter wives were good Catholics both, so Leslie switched his allegiance to the Roman Catholic church, and it was in the Canadian Martyrs Church that his funeral mass was celebrated. (What would “The Old Man” have thought?!)
From the time of our 40s, Leslie and I visited back and forth with our wives, and he and I became closer friends than had been possible before. I visited him in hospital in Ottawa twice during the early summer months before cancer took final control. Bed-ridden when he and I were together, he suddenly said: “For oft when on my couch I lie/ In vacant or in pensive mood” and I recognised Wordsworth’s daffodils. Having an iPhone with me, we looked up the full poem, and this got him started, as he recalled sections of many more: ‘The Village Schoolmaster,’ ‘How Horatius Kept the Bridge,’ ‘Gray’s Elegy’ and others. He was (quite) fluent with passages of all of these and more, things that he had learned in Totnes around 75 years earlier. Remarkable that my residing happy memories of my only brother revolve around things that LOS/Reed’s drummed into him all those years ago!
John MacArthur (1942-1949), brother of Leslie
John Merriman Bain
December 1943 to May 2016 John, age 72, left this earth on Sunday, May 29 2016, at his home in Waimea Bay on the North Shore of O‘ahu, Hawaii, surrounded by friends and family. He was born on December 19 1943, in Cape Town, South Africa to social worker Eileen Blythe Bain, and entrepreneur and philanthropist, Donald Bain, who made a groundbreaking study of the history of the Kalahari Bushmen for the British Empire in 1936-7. John’s great-grandfather, Andrew Geddes Bain, was South Africa’s first geologist and revolutionized transportation routes throughout the country, and his grandfather, Thomas Charles John Bain, continued the legacy by engineering 23 major mountain roads, many of which are still in use today. After his time at Reed’s, John went on to become a graphic and fine artist, working in New York City in the 1960s before relocating to Hawaii. John painted the story of a North Shore that is often unseen. He created a series of surfboard portraits depicting close friends, surfing icons and community activists. His work was exhibited at Café Haleiwa and can be seen throughout the community on signs, advertisements, t-shirts and bumper stickers. John created posters for concerts and happenings, including a classic image for the Grateful Dead concert in Diamond Head Crater. He was responsible for the iconic t-shirt art for the North Shore Lifeguard Association’s Pipeline Bodysurf Contests for many years, and hand-painted the signage for well
known North Shore establishments like Shark’s Cove Grill, North Shore Commerce, Kua ‘Aina Burger, Pizza Bob’s and the Proud Peacock at Waimea Valley.
John was loved by many for his quickwitted humour, generosity, vast knowledge of history and culture and eloquent command of the English language. He was a loyal friend to many. He is survived by his half-niece Judy Orpen, half-nephews Clive Bain and Peter Bain, niece Frederika Bain, and cat Tigger, but he himself lives on in the minds and hearts of the many whose lives he touched.
A memorial paddle-out and service was held on Sunday, December 16 2016, at Waimea Bay on the eve of what would have been John’s 73rd birthday and at the time of year he loved for its surf and surf culture.
Frederika Bain, niece of John
Donald M Bain (Capel 1958)
January 1942 – May 1990 Don joined Reed’s in 1951 aged 9, left in 1958 from the Arts VI, represented the School in athletics and 2nd XV rugby and was a lance-corporal in the ACF, attaining
Certificate A Parts I and II.
Sadly we knew little about Donald’s life after Reed’s, but remember him as a popular and enthusiastic fellow pupil.
Roger Mew, OR contemporary
Posthumous Tribute to Rodney Exton (Headmaster 1964-1977)
(by Douglas Taylor, Mullens 1970) Ever since I left Reed’s (a long time ago), I have never formally recognized Rodney Exton’s sincere dedication to characterbuilding and for trying to drill into my “thick skull” the importance of thinking tactics in cricket! He was extremely modest and never told me his own story… that he had
been a very talented cricket player who had his sports career sadly interrupted, as a young adult, by polio. It is only time and curiosity that encourages us to look back and search for answers as to why someone should go to such lengths to squeeze out of me whatever talent I had for the game. True teachers seem to have a built-in desire to produce better and more complete versions of themselves. They are certainly not in it for the money. Much greater satisfaction seems to come out of the results they produce through their students.
In the rugby season, I suffered an impacted fracture in the left shoulder which should have put me out of the game and certainly prevented me from playing cricket in the summer. After two manipulations under general anaesthetic and physiotherapy, Rodney Exton decided I should continue exercises by practicing golf shots on the school grounds in the hockey season – and by playing with an old friend of his on a very traditional golf course. Certainly he wasn’t going to give up! Well the rest is history now.… I am sure nobody else will lose his head and score exactly 99 in an afternoon match against another school, play for Surrey Schools in Canada, nor open for England Public Schools at Lord’s (in a one-and-only match) and score a fifty! I owe a lot to Rodney Exton for taking me out of the comfort zone and showing that a lot is possible, if you persist and don’t waste whatever talent you have.
A great pity I did not say that to his face…. I am sure that many former students deeply appreciate the time dedicated by their teachers. I have singled out Rodney Exton, but all of them in my day were interesting characters and dedicated, tolerant individuals. Many students, like me, may not have had the decency to ‘create time’ to say it. If there are any close relatives of Rodney Exton ‘still around’, I should be very satisfied if you can pass this on.
Rev Douglas James Challis (Former Chaplain, 1967-1981)
August 1921 to June 2017 ‘Jim’ Challis passed away on 14th June 2017 aged 95 years. He was the Chaplain at Reed’s during Rodney Exton’s headship and kept in touch by telephone from his home at Laird in Scotland with other former masters, most recently to gather any news (gossip) of former colleagues! His career saw him hold the following positions: Chaplain of Summer Fields School, Oxford (1958-60); Assistant Chaplain of Stowe School (1960-63); St Bees School (1963-72); Chaplain at Reed’s School, Cobham (1973-81) and latterly at Crowhurst Christian Healing Centre (2005-06).
Shiraz N. Lalani (Blathwayt 1959)
September 1943 to January 2017 Shiraz passed away on 2nd January 2017 in Hampstead, London, surrounded by his family.
Originally born in Dar es Salam, Tanzania, he moved with his family to London, attended Reed’s as one of the first students of South Asian origin and then went on to read Economics at the London School of Economics. He then moved to Karachi, Pakistan, with his father where they worked together to establish an industrial enterprise. His son Rahim (Blathwayt 1997) subsequently also attended Reed’s and now continues work on the same initiative in Pakistan. While at Reed’s, Shiraz would cycle and explore Surrey and beyond. Shiraz was present when the Queen Mother visited in 1959, planted a tree and opened the new wing (now the 6th Form house) in which his son, Rahim, subsequently boarded. 38 years later Rahim was present when the Queen visited in 1997, saw the tree planted by the Queen Mother and planted a tree herself. On both occasions, Mrs Shirin Lalani, once as Shiraz’s mother and once as Rahim’s grandmother, participated in the ceremonies at the School.
Shiraz leaves behind his beautiful wife, Karimeh, and his two sons, Rahim and Nooruddin. He would always remark that life is dynamic.
Rahim Lalani, son of Shiraz
Eddie Parsons (Bristowe 1940)
July 1925 to December 2016 Eddie’s daughter wrote to let us know that sadly her father, Edwin (Eddie) Parsons passed away on 4th December 2016. Here is a picture of him taken when Sharmaine met up with him and the Wyatt brothers back in 2010.
The Rev Nicolas Stacey (Former Governor)
November 1927 to May 2018 We are saddened to report the death of former Reed’s Governor, The Rev. Nicolas Stacey. Nicolas David Stacey, clergyman and social services director, was born on 27 November 1927 and died on 8th May 2017.
He left the Anglican ministry because he came to believe that he was better able to try to build the kingdom of God through secular structures. He was an outstanding
director of social services for Kent from 1974 to 1985 and had a lasting practical influence outside the county. He introduced the UK’s first professional fostering scheme and individually tailored home care for older people.
Born in London, Nick was a twin, and one of three children of David Stacey, a stockbroker, and his wife, Gwen. At the Royal Naval College, Dartmouth, he won the King’s Telescope (the naval equivalent of Sandhurst’s sword of honour). He resigned his commission, studied modern history at St Edmund Hall, Oxford, and sought ordination at Cuddesdon Theological College, outside the city. While at Oxford, The Rev Stacey competed as a sprinter in the British Empire games in 1949, and in 1951 he served as captain of the combined Oxford and Cambridge athletics team. In the 1952 Olympics, he was semi-finalist in the 200m and finalist in the 4x400m relay.
In 1955 he married Anne Bridgeman who died last year, and he is survived by their three children, David, Caroline and Mary, four grandsons, two granddaughters, and his brother, the writer and publisher Tom Stacey. His twin sister, Jill, died in 2005.
Malcolm Hume (Mullens 1975)
October 1956 to July 2017 We heard from Malcolm’s sister, Fiona, that he sadly passed away peacefully on 2nd July 2017 at Trinity Hospice, Blackpool with both of his sisters at his side. He had battled for four years against cancer and was aged just 60. Malcolm sadly leaves a beloved son, Scott, 21 years of age. Malcolm’s was a Captain in the Merchant Navy and at his funeral in July, he had a guard of honour of eight from the Merchant Navy and they flew the flag at half mast at the nautical college where he trained.
Should any of his former class mates wish to get in touch, Fiona would be delighted to hear from them. Please contact Sharmaine for an email address.
Howard Young (Capel 1988)
November 1969 to April 2017 Howard’s partner, Kerry Knight, emailed to let us know that sadly he had passed away unexpectedly on 12th April 2017, aged just 47. She writes: Howard passed away at home in Ipswich, Suffolk. He was born on 29th November, 1969 in Uganda, Africa to Eileen and Terence Young. Throughout his education, he gained O Levels, A Levels, a 2:1 Degree and an MA. He spent the majority of his working life working in IT with his most recent position being an IT Director for Moneyfacts.
Howard lived his life to the fullest whilst always demonstrating his huge love for family and friends. He touched many lives and was loved by all who met him. He is survived by his Fiancee Kerry, Brother Adrian, Children, Noah and Darcey and Step-Children, Connor, Keileigh and Liberty-Rose.
John Charles Warner Mudd (London Orphan School)
September 1914 to January 2017 John Charles Warner Mudd was born in September 1914, just after the start of WW1, in Leyton, East London. His father was killed in the last months of the war and his mother was left to care and provide for the children. John and his sister, Mary, were educated at London Orphan School, Watford. Their father and uncle had been educated there before them as their father (John’s grandfather) had died in a ‘flu’ epidemic in the 1890s.
School years were remembered fondly by John. He recognised the education he received at Reed’s School equipped him to further his studies, first at Sixth Form in Hackney Downs Grammar School, and then at Imperial College London where he gained a degree in biology. He spoke of the kindness he experienced at school - from the scout mistress, the school nurse and other staff. He and his sister were able to meet up on Sunday afternoon’s for one hour. Their mother would visit every month and he greatly appreciated this.
John studied to be a teacher. He went on to build a successful career as a science teacher, house master, and finally, head teacher, and went on to set up one of the very first comprehensive schools, now Reigate School, Surrey. In WW2 John was a conscientious objector. This brought him into contact with Quakers. He later joined the Society of Friends (Quakers). As a CO he was permitted to continue in his chosen career and helped children who had been evacuated from cities to settle in new surroundings in rural Gloucestershire.
After the war John married Evelyn who was also a teacher. They had two daughters, Sarah and Bridget.
On retirement, John and Evelyn moved to rural Dorset beginning a new chapter in their lives. He always provided practical help to others where he could. His faith, his patient kindness, his respect for nature and commitment to teaching, were an inspiration to many – his family, his pupils, and the many people who encountered him in his voluntary work.
At the age of 98 he relinquished living independently and moved to live with his elder daughter. Just before his 102nd birthday he elected to move again to Manor Lodge Care Home in Chelmsford where his daughters visited him daily. He recognised his physical needs could no longer be managed at home. “It is time to make way for the next generation”, he said.
He died on 23 January 2017 leaving two daughters, five grandchildren and six great grandchildren.
John MacArthur, brother of Leslie
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