Sunday Magazine 13th Oct 2013

Sunday

Times October 13, 2013

Star Times Bollywood:

‘Boss’ enters Guinness Book of World Records for largest poster See story on page 14

Magazine

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Local Markets on Display for Xmas Fair Page 2

Page 10

2 Times Sunday Magazine

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October 13, 2013

Times Feature

T

he Kanuku Mountains C o m m u n i t y Representative Group Christmas Fair Committee (KMCRG - XmFC) is yet again holding its annual Rupununi Christmas Fair, to be held at the Market Place, Lethem, on December 21.

Following the success of the event last year, the fourth Rupununi Christmas Fair will be showcasing a range of gifts, including locally made handicraft, jewellery, cosmetics, soaps and natural products, as well as a wider range of delicious foods and beverages.

The popularity of the competitions and the useful nature of prizes will see the return of the feature event.

Three proficient individuals have already accepted the task to judge the competitions.

Last year, the overall winners of each category received awards and, through donations from supporters of the fair, the Fair Committee was able to provide them with the cost of flights to and from Lethem as well as a daily allowance. The Shulinab Women's Group won a free TGA return flight, registration, stall hire and expenses for one of their members to attend GuyExpo in Georgetown and the Helping Hands Women Producers' Cooperative Society won an all expense paid, two-week cookery workshop donated

by Birch-Smith, formerly of Maggie's Restaurant.

Enjoy cassava biscuits at the fair

op their skills and to market their products.

“We would be delighted to receive your support for the Christmas Fair and its role in promoting the values and traditions, particularly of Amerindian communities in the Rupununi,” she said in a press release.

The types of awards the committee is welcoming are educational/exchange trips to

a centre of excellence in the appropriate field; travel and accommodation expenses to attend workshops at centres of excellence; attendance of workshop or training coursed in the appropriate field, materials that assist with brand or marketing development such as product labels, stationary, banners; specialized packaging such as jars, rolls of plastic tubing, plastic con-

tainers; specialist tools for handicrafts; and kitchen and catering utensils and equipment.

“We hope that you will find it appropriate to support this important event.

Funds can be placed directly into the following account: Kanuku Mountains Community Representative Group (KMCRG) Christmas Fair; GBTI - Lethem branch Account No. 008600604018 or send emails to goloony@aol. com,” she encouraged.

Behi added that the Kanuku Mountains Community Representative Group Christmas Fair Committee hopes that persons will be able to support this festive event by attending the fair, spreading the news about the event, and to help the committee’s fundraising activity by donations in cash or in kind. (Cover photo: Expect to see Moco Moco produce in abundance at the fair)

The Shulinab Women's Group at the Rupununi Christmas Fair last year

According to Behi Barzegar, Development Management Consultant/ Enterprise Development Specialist, Lethem, the KMCRG Christmas Fair

Committee is currently looking for sponsorship for awards and prizes that would encourage enterprising activities and motivate participants to continue to devel-

Women groups preparing cassava bread at the fair

International Day for Disaster Reduction

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‘Living with Disability and Disasters’

oday, Oct 13, is International Day for Disaster Reduction, and the UN has declared this year’s theme, “Living with Disability and Disasters” to focus on some one billion people around the world who live with some form of disability.

Representing one-fifth of the world's population, persons living with disabilities have unique contributions, often overlooked, to help reduce the risk of disasters and build resilient societies and communities.

The UN Secretary General, in his message on the occasion noted that more than one billion persons in the world live with a disability, and this year’s commemoration of the International Day for Disaster Reduction is an opportunity to recognize their vital role in fostering resilience.

Unfortunately, most persons with disabilities have never participated in disaster risk management or related planning and decision making processes and it is they who suffer disproportionately high levels of disaster-related mortality and injuries.

Early warning systems, public awareness campaigns and other responses often fail to consider the needs of persons with disabilities, putting them at an unnecessarily elevated risk and sending a harmful

message of inequality.

The SG urged that we can change this situation by including persons with disabilities in disaster resilience initiatives and policy planning. The recent General Assembly High-level Meeting on Disability and Development recognized the urgent need for action on this issue, which is also addressed in the Convention on the Rights of Persons with Disabilities.

“Inclusion saves lives. And it empowers persons with disabilities to take ownership of their own safety – and that of their community.

We can already see their potential contribution in the many persons with visible and invisible disabilities around the world who already serve as volunteers and workers helping communities when disaster hits to cope and bounce back.

On the International Day for Disaster Reduction, let us resolve to do everything possible to ensure that all persons with disabilities have the highest possible levels of safety and the greatest possible chance to contribute to the overall wellbeing of society. Let us build an inclusive world where persons with disabilities can play an even greater role as resourceful agents of change,” the message concluded.

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October 13, 2013

Times Sunday Magazine

3

Times Focus

INSIDE A Legacy of Compassion Pg 4

2012 Pg 6 Guyana Prize for Literature III

Miley Cyrus opens up about her split with Liam Pg 12

W

Children waiting to collect their toys

ith a very strong love for their homeland, especially their village, Moruca-born sisters Stephanie Wall and Regina Rodrigues are focused on bringing joy to the hearts of Guyanese children, and they have fun doing it.

Regina and Stephanie, who migrated to Canada many years ago, are both retired.

Their mission now is to dedicate their time to giving back to their Moruca community.

They raise funds throughout the year, contributed by family and friends, and use this to buy toys for the children to make life a little more enjoyable for the community that once nurtured them.

The sisters ship half a dozen barrels loaded with toys for children in Moruca. They are also committed to raising funds and other resources to restore the church building at Santa Rosa. Additionally, they were successful in gathering community members to come together to build a house for an elderly Moruca resident.

In an interview with Guyana Times Sunday Magazine, Regina stated that her mother, the late Martina Rodrigues, started a similar initiative but on a smaller scale.

started by sending out an email to family and friends in Toronto, specifically those with children, asking for clothing and toys.

The response was phenomenal. We packed and posted our first two barrels. From that we grew, and it is now our annual toy drive for the children of Moruca. Stephanie, our brother Eugene and I went to Moruca in 2011. We distributed to every child a toy, an item of clothing and candy. It was a great expeStephanie, (left) who travels over two hours to help rience,” she recalled. distribute toys, and her good friend Elaine Regina noted that the community of Moruca is not March 2013, they shipped sports a “prosperous one, and people depend on equipment, cricket balls, tennis balls, their farms where they plant cassava and soccer balls and sports shirts and jervegetables; fish and rear chickens.” She seys, for the students in secondary mentioned during a visit to Moruca that school. she and her sister saw a great need to proIn March Stephanie’s two adult chilvide something to bring joy to the children dren, Lisa and Chris and also Lisa’s husof the community. Regina recollected that band, made the trip to Moruca to assist with the distribution. Regina noted that Lisa and Gary have since sent three barrels to be divided between the secondary and primary schools. A key person in Moruca who will help with this particular distribution is Whanita Phillips who has worked with the PTA and continues to work closely with the schools’ administration. Regina thanked her relatives in Guyana who do the work of clearing the many barrels and shipping them to Moruca.

“Stephanie and I, as well as our brother and older sisters, remember our excitement when boxes (we don't know from where) would arrive in Moruca and we would receive a dress or a toy that we would cherish. This has not changed much in that we still see joy in the faces of the children when they are handed a little car or a stuffed toy, or how they would cherish a small candy that was given to them. The benefits of givThe Moruca ladies who help in distributing the toys. Regina is far right (in red shirt) ing back as a family are huge, Her mother lived in Canada and would pack the children would get very excited over the and we are so heartened that a barrel every year and ship it to Santa little toy cars and dolls she and her sister the younger generation in our Rosa, Moruca, for distribution to her family handed out. From this the idea of a toy drive family has felt the need to do and friends. Regina said her mother nev- was born. this on their own and we hope er forgot from where she came, and always This year, five barrels were shipped that they will continue. Even tried to give something back. Observing for distribution in Moruca. Regina and the little ones, like Stephanie’s this, Regina and her sister emulated their Stephanie, once again, were there for the grandchildren, have little bags mother’s attitude and continued her chari- distribution with the help of the women of stuff for the children of ty work. Their mother passed away in 1992. from the community as willing volunteers. Moruca,” she pointed out.

“After we retired from our jobs, my sister This time the sisters included school supRegina and Stephanie has Stephanie and I decided to have a toy drive plies (pens, pencils, note books, children’s also collaborated with the for the children of Moruca. We started to books, and novels- just to name a few) in Guyana Foundation headed by prepare for our first drive in 2010. Stephanie each package given out to the children. In Supriya Singh Bodden. The

A Guyanese digital Pg 21 artist in Hollywood

Waramuri Pg 23

sisters donated school and other supplies to the children of Pigeon Island on the East Coast. They also shipped a barrel to the foundation in September for distribution by the Guyana Foundation.

“We wish we could do more but can only continue to do what we can as this is a family venture and we are not registered as a charitable organization. However, we do wish to say thanks to our relatives and friends in Canada and the U.S. who have donated clothing and some funds to help us with the shipping expenses. We appreciate that very much,” Regina said appreciatively.

For more information on this family initiative, visit jrodmorucanewsletter.weebly. com

Packing the barrels in Canada

4

Times Sunday Magazine

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October 13, 2013

Times Feature

T

he Imam Abdul Razak Foundation is a multicultural and interracial organization founded by persons who are passionate in helping the needy.

The foundation came into being through the efforts of Sham Razak, the last son of the late Imam Abdul Razak and Latifan Razak of Cornelia Ida, West Coast Demerara.

Imam Abdul Razak was born in 1926 into a very humble family. In his lifetime, and accompanied by his wife of 48 years, Latifan, he accomplished many great tasks. Together they provided food and shelter to the needy, and their efforts enabled several parents with the means to provide higher education for their children. During his countless sermons and lectures, not only in Guyana but later throughout the world, Imam Abdul Razak was constantly striving to share the message of peace, love and help for our Recipients in Canada who benefitted from scholarships this year

Sham Razak (left) at a ceremony where he presented scholarships to students to pursue university education

fellow human beings.

In 2000, after the death of both Imam Razak and his wife Latifan, their youngest son Sham, along with his wife Nazli, decided to

continue the efforts of providing food, shelter and financial support to persons in Guyana and Canada.

Together they seek to continue the message of peace, love and help for fellow hu-

man beings. The goal of the foundation is to continue to assist members of the community in the same way Sham’s parents always did – by dedicating anything they had to help others.

In Canada, the foundation provides financial assistance and moral support to the elderly and those facing hardship; monthly financial assistance, groceries and basic needs provided to numerous individuals; free financial and business advice to individuals of low income; free tax services for seniors and low income individuals; university scholarships given annually to qualified individuals; and necessities of life for victims suffering from a natural disaster in their country.

In Guyana, the organisation provides groceries annually, meals and finances to be given to 1,000 individuals; provides homes and food to orphans; offers medical assistance to the elderly; provides monthly food and financial assistance to individuals of low income; and offers a 4-year university scholarship given annually to one qualified individual.

In an interview with Guyana Times Sunday Magazine, Sham stated that the Imam Abdul Razak Foundation was created with one goal in mind - helping others. “Whether you’re an elderly person who requires assistance; suffering from a natural disaster in your country; a student who needs financial aid, or you just want some advice, then we want to help.”

He recalled spending his youth attending many of the religious and social activities his father and mother were involved in, and having countless discussions with them on the

value of helping others.

Migrating to Canada in 1974, he tried to instil these values into his own life and that of his children, Naseeba and Shiraz, who also share their parents’ strong values. Sham is fully supported by his wife Nazli in all these endeavours.

For the fourth year running, the foundation is offering scholarships to students for college or university education.

“We’re continuing our charitable efforts with providing finances for students in Guyana who are writing their CSEC examinations. We also have a programme where we provide lunch for the poor and needy every first Friday

monthly. We also provide monthly financial assistance to these ones. We are currently looking at expanding our scholarship programme to finance those students who have excelled at CSEC to help them pursue studies at the university. We will be feeding the elderly, and those in need, for Eid al-Adha, at Cornelia Ida. Also, CSEC exams fees will be paid for 100 individuals in Guyana,” Sham outlined.

He also noted that all funds acquired by the foundation are private and no contribution is taken from the public.

For more information on the foundation’s work log on to www.razakfoundation.com

The late Imam Abdul Razak

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October 13, 2013

Times Sunday Magazine 5

Times Women

Overcoming challenges to accomplish goals is not an easy task, and newly appointed attorney-at-law Delicia Helwig knows this too well

O

ctober 10, 2013 was an emotional day for 23-year-old Delicia Helwig when she presented her petition to the Guyana Bar Association; delivered

by Senior Counsel Edward Luckhoo and received by Madame Justice Dawn Gregory.

During the ceremony, Delicia tearfully spoke of

earned her Legal Education Certificate and was placed on the Principal’s Roll of Honour.

During her stint at HWLS, she was the recipient of the Phelps & Co Prize for Best Performance in Civil Practice and Procedure I; the Robert Mathieu Sellier Memorial Prize for Best performance in Trial

later years,” she noted.

One of her main challenges was finances.

“I think this one was more of my father’s challenge, but it became mine because I often worry about all the money that he had to muster in order to make my dream a reality; he never left me undone, never. I am indeed lucky to have

Some of Delicia's certificates and medals received at law school

the difficulties she faced in the long journey to realise her dreams of becoming a lawyer.

Speaking in an interview with Guyana Times Sunday Magazine, the young attorney revealed that since the age of 8, she had dreamed of becoming a lawyer.

“As a child, my parents would forever complain that I was too argumentative and showed too much opposition to their rebuke. I distinctly remember my nursery school teacher lamenting, “Wow, this girl must become a lawyer. Even if she gets married let her keep her name as I’ll be looking for it in years to come.

She must be a lawyer.” To say the least, I was in full agreement with my parents and teachers on my career choice. Often I would secretly throw on my mother’s dark curtains and pretend to be an advocate representing a little old lady or a troubled child in a court of law.

I knew that I had it in me; I knew that becoming an attorney was my dream,” she recalled.

Delicia attended Mae’s Primary before obtaining a place at Bishops’ High School in 2001. She attained 10 subjects, inclusive of 5 distinctions, at CSEC then moved to the University of Guyana for one year of International Relations and one year of the preparatory law programme, before moving on to read for her law degree (LLB) in 2008.

In 2011, she graduated with credit from the LLB programme, and her next two years were spent in Trinidad and Tobago at the Hugh Wooding Law School (HWLS) where she

Advocacy; the Principal’s Award for Advocacy and the Cameron & Shepherd Prize for Best Performance in Civil Procedure and Practice I and Civil Procedure and Practice II by a Guyanese student.

“Undeniably, I’m most interested in criminal law although I’ve captured the civil prizes. Besides the theatrics, I believe that the criminal practice would allow me to effect change in society as a whole since crime is everyone’s business, as opposed to contract or land law which exists between private individuals.

Nonetheless, I have a penchant for family law, probate practice, conveyancing and personal injuries, and could definitely see myself involved in these areas in

parents who sacrificed their own wellbeing and comforts to put me through school. I must acknowledge the contribution of my parents, siblings, close relatives, lecturers and friends. No one succeeds without the help of others, and I thank each and every one who has helped me to get to where I am today,” she disclosed.

In outlining what she intends to contribute to the legal system in Guyana, the lawyer stated that the core of the legal profession’s role is client service. She referred to her Legal Aid tutor who told her that whether she is representing a multinational corporate client or working on a legal aid brief to help an abused woman, the fundamental purpose of the legal professional is to

Holding prizes at her recent graduation from Hugh Wooding Law School

help others resolve their legal problems.

In this vein, Delicia plans to be as prepared and as thorough as she can in the preparation and execution of her clients’ case so as to provide impeccable legal service. This, she believes, would improve the overall quality of service provided by the legal profession as a whole.

“Secondly, I am of the opinion that the legal profession is in dire need of the confidence of the community, and so I wish to aid in resolving the disrepute that surrounds the practice of law by the very way that I would conduct my practice.

Often we hear people say, “Lawyers are dishonest; all they care about is your money.” Although some persons make these comments without good reason, others have just cause for saying same – be it a personal experience with an attorney or otherwise.

Therefore I intend to conduct myself in a way which befits the noble profession; that is, not only to be thorough in my work but also to possess a demeanour of integrity and honesty, even do some pro bono work from time to time; all with the aim of restoring the confidence of the people in the legal profession. I certainly do believe that change can begin with one person, others will eventually be encouraged to follow suit,” a confident Delicia pointed out.

Delicia has many athletic achievements under her belt.

In sports, she was a member of the Guyana National Swimming team from

Delicia (right) with Madame Justice Dawn Gregory during the ceremony of being addmitted to the Guyana Bar Association

1997-2005. She represented Guyana at events such as the Goodwill Swimming Championships and other regional championships. She is also a former member of the National School of Dance and current member of the National Dance Company.

Delicia represented Guyana at CARIFESTA X in 2008.

Notably, she is a holder of a SHO (1st) Dan black belt in Shotokan karate from the Japan Karate Association.

Additionally, she placed third runner-up in the Mother and Daughter 2009 pageant (senior category) and graced the stage at the Guyana Fashion Weekend for three consecutive years (2008-2010).

Her other interests include humanitarian work with charitable organisations, and active involvement in youth empowerment. She was part of the

Guybernet youth group and past member of the Anglican Diocese youth group.

Delicia is currently working in chambers as a junior attorney, but it is her fervent desire to work as state prosecutor, move on to become director of public prosecutions and then to serve as a judge. Her ultimate plan is to open a law firm, Helwig and Associates.

“I was invited to speak to young adults at the Mahaica Children’s Home, and I told them, as I would tell any youth, whether they want to become a lawyer or something else, to chase their dreams, stay focused, remain humble and keep God at the centre of their existence. Never let anyone tell you that you can’t. If you want something and you want it bad enough then you can, and no one has the right to stop you.”

6 Times Sunday Magazine

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October 13, 2013

Times Book World

The Shaping of Guyanese Literature

2012 Guyana Prize for Literature III

By Petamber Persaud

(Continued from Oct 6)

The 2012 Guyana Prize for Literature was awarded in September 2013.

Extract of an interview with Brendan de Caires in Georgetown, Guyana, August 16, 2013. de Caires is a literary critic and reviewer, working in Canada. He has worked in Trinidad as editor and book reviewer for the “Caribbean Review of Books”, (CRB) and for the review section of “Caribbean Beat”. He has also published other literary articles and reviews, and is a co-founder of Moray House Trust in Georgetown.

De Caries is a native of Guyana who has lived in Britain, Trinidad, Barbados, Mexico, and New York, working as editor, human rights activist, and English literature and ESL teacher. He is currently program and communications coordinator for PEN Canada. This is the second time he has sat on the panel of judges for The Guyana Prize for Literature.

PP How should we go about opening up ourselves to the hidden voices in our society?

BdC That’s a hard question to answer. But here is something – the Guyana I

grew up in [early 70s] had the last remnants of a reading public. People were still well educated and there were a number of bookstores. There was still a sense that words mattered.

This is one of the few countries in the world where the national poet can be quoted by more than half of the population. I can only think of one other country where this is likely: Russia.

At a certain point in modern Russian history, nearly everyone could quote Anna Akhmatova.

I would say that most people who grew up in the 60s could quote at least three lines of Martin Carter...because he was writing about their reality. Since then I can’t think of any poet of comparable stature. I’m not saying there haven’t been any writers with similar qualities, just none of that stature. Writers who speak to just one section of a society rarely produce anything of substance.

PP As we are on the subject of contemporary writing, what are your thoughts about current Guyanese writers, local writers?

BdC When you are trying to solve the problem of local writing, you can’t fix one thing. You have to revive an education system

that will deliver a large number of literate people, you need to have bookstores and publishers with sufficient standing, and quality presses with a credible editorial process. You need people who can vet manuscripts and improve them as needed. There is a tendency to feel that if you publish anything, you’ve arrived – it doesn’t quite work that way. Or at least it shouldn’t.

Many countries that have poured a lot of resources into local talent, artistic and literary, regardless of the quality, have often found themselves saddled with a decade of unreadable material.

PP You have just had a close look at Guyanese Literature, what do you think of it?

BdC That’s a tricky question. I don’t want to say anything that is too summary.

I have had two snapshots of what is out there, but I doubt that it is a good indication of what is really available.

PP I understand that.

Let’s go on what is available.

BdC The first time round, the quality was surprising low and this year, with a few exceptions, it wasn’t much better. Oddly enough the poetry submis-

Brendan de Caires (R) in conversation at Moray House Trust with Dr Rupert Roopnaraine

sions were strong in the first year – even though it’s much harder to write poetry well. But the unevenness in both years comes back to the problems we’ve been talking about. Established writers have a natural advantage in these situations, because their books have been vetted, edited, published. Often they are up against manuscripts which have not been inspected or worked over...

PP Or reworked BdC But more than that I think you have this distancing effect when you read a novel published by a Guyanese writer who has being living abroad, it is de facto, a novel about the past, probably 30-40 years back. I was struck by the absence of contemporary Guyana in

most of the fiction.

PP There is no writing talking back to present day Guyana?

BdC I wouldn’t say there is no writing, but few of these submissions talk back to our current reality. There have to be writers who are dealing with the here and now.

PP We see it daily in the letter columns of the newspapers BdC There again, the task of addressing daily life and its problems has moved into journalism. It doesn’t belong in fiction any more.

(TO BE CONTINUED) Responses to this author telephone (592) 226-0065 or

email: oraltradition2002@ yahoo.com What’s happening: • The Guyana Annual 2012-2013 magazine is now available at Guyenterprise Ltd, at Austin’s bookstore and from the editor at the above contacts. This issue of the magazine is dedicated to E. R. Braithwaite. The magazine also features articles on copyright, law of intellectual property, creative industries, oral traditions of Guyana, the future of West Indian cricket and the future of books.

• Coming soon: “An Introduction to Guyanese Literature” by Petamber Persaud.

This 150-pagebook is a rich collection of Guyanese pride and joy, containing more than 100 photographs.

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October 13, 2013

Times Sunday Magazine 7

Times Feature

Young Professionals

Ronessa Roslyn Mc Adam

Star of the week

Foreign Language Translator

By Vahnu Manikchand

T

he saying, “When one loves one’s job, one does not work a day in one’s life” aptly fits 27-year-old Ronessa Mc Adam, who finds her work as a translator a daily satisfaction.

Mc Adam spent her childhood in Bartica, where she lived with her parents. As a child she was outgoing and friendly. “I had a very exciting and playful childhood; I had a lot of friends.

Bartica is not as rural as people think, we had a comfortable life. I remember opening my backdoor to a river, and we were surrounded by fruit trees.”

Age the age of 10 she moved with her parents to Georgetown where she attended St Agnes Primary School and wrote SSEE. She passed to St Joseph’s High School but left after two years to attend Bishop’s High School. During her secondary days, Mc Adam was very active in sports, debates and other social events. She wrote CXC in 2002, attaining passes in 10 subjects, and received an award for the best all round performance.

Mc Adam then went on to sit the CAPE in Spanish, and A Levels. She was the best year one student in the Caribbean for A Level examinations. Having done law at both CAPE and A Levels, Mc Adam was advised to pursue a career in that field, and enrolled at the University of Guyana.

However she quickly realized that her interest lies elsewhere.

"I was encouraged by some family friends to study law. I signed up for it but after the first week I realized I didn’t want to do that so I took a year off and returned in 2005 to study language because I loved the idea of learning a new language and learning about new cultures."

She graduated with a degree in Spanish with a minor in French. She was also the best graduating student in Modern Languages.

After completing her studies, Mc Adam began working at the Mexican embassy as a secretary translator, and is there currently.

Apart from spending her years educating herself, Mc Adam has also been active in the fashion industry as she modelled on some of the biggest platforms in Guyana. She began her modelling career at just two.

“My mother was a designer by hobby and my father used to work with the Bartica Regatta Pageant, so fashion had a big role in my life. I’m always into the latest trend growing up and so getting into modelling was not strange for me.”

Her first modelling gig was the Simply Irresistible show by fashion icon, Sonia Noel and to date, she is still working with Noel as a seasoned model for Guyana Fashion Week shows.

Apart from modelling, Mc Adam was also into dancing, but had to give it up to pursue her studies.

Mc Adam is also involved in several charity programs. Her latest is the ‘Beacon of Hope’, an organization that provides basic needs for underprivileged children in homes.

She advises youths who have dreams and aspirations to pursue what they want and not to be dissuaded by anyone to do something they do not want to. "Never do anything for money – I know the economy is bad and cost of living also – but when you do something that you like and you enjoy, then it will never feel like work; otherwise it will be bored and tiresome."

She also encourages youths to focus on their education, noting that the social life will always be there so let knowledge be their priority.

C

arlea Chappel is a sparkling beauty from Essequibo currently pursuing a Sociology degree at the University of Guyana. She also works as a customer service agent at Neal and Massy Group of Companies. The aspiring lawyer, who recently placed second runnerup in the Miss Guyana Universe pageant, views herself as a more “flip flops and t-shirt” type of girl, and never thought of entering pageants or modelling. Although she did not win her debut pageant, the 19-year-old beauty used her experiences as a catalyst for “regaining her voice and bravery.” Carlea is determined to find ways of promoting the importance of empowering young women; it was one reason she decided to enter the pageant. As a determined individual, Carlea faced her fear of pageantry and successfully overcame it. She focused on using the platform to eloquently speak about empowering young women. Focused on a bright future, Carlea is firm on excelling in her studies, and continues to seek ways to empower young women.

8 Times Sunday Magazine

October 13, 2013

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Times Kids Page

Did you know?

T

he Payara or Vampire Fish (Hydrolycus scomberoides) is a large fish species found in the Amazon River basin in fast moving water and rapids.

They can reach a length of 120 cm (almost 2 feet) and weigh up to 18 kg (40 pounds), and are very aggressive, predatory fish, capable of eating fish that are half their own body size.

They are also called Dracula Fish, Dog Fish or Wolf Fish and normally impale their victims with their oversized bottom canine teeth and streak their flesh away.

Vampire fish prey primarily on smaller fish, especially piranhas.

Its fearsome teeth can grow up to six inches long.

The payara is prized for its meat in the Amazon and Orinoco basins.

Colouring Fun The objective of the game is to fill all the blank squares in a game with the correct numbers. Every row of 9 numbers must include all digits 1 through 9 in any order. Every column of 9 numbers must include all digits 1 through 9 in any order. Every 3 by 3 subsection of the 9 by 9 square must include all digits 1 through 9.

please see solution on page 22

Dot to dot

Fun Facts

Technology * The first coin operated video games such as ‘Computer Space’ a n d * Although the World the Internet, the two are a huge network of networks all over the world using a technologies. The World Wide pages that are accessed using the * Televisions first went on sale only display in black and white.

were introduced in the 1970s, with titles ‘Pong’ gaining popularity.

Wide Web is often referred to as not the same thing. The Internet is that links computers together range of wires and wireless Web is the collection of linked Internet and a web browser. in the late 1920s; they could

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October 13, 2013

Times Sunday Magazine 9

10 Times Sunday Magazine Times Fashion

D

esigner Nelsion Andre Nurse has launched yet another trendy collection, and this time his focus is on helping men feel confident about their fashionable nature.

Since his debut collection at Guyana Fashion Weekend (GFW) 2010, and being awarded Most Promising Designer, Nurse has not sat on his laurels. He has been consistently active, working in various facets of the creative industry since his hallmark introduction.

Nurse has been designing costume art for children and adult bands; and set designs for public and private sector entities, and has worked closely as production assistant for Caribbean Fashion expert, Richard Young; for GFW and Guyana Model Search and Designer Nelsion Andre Nurse

Designers Portfolio. With children, he works with different schooling groups to teach movement and craft.

The designer has recently launched a new collection: Man in the Mirror, suited for the classy man.

“Ultimately, man should not ask what the meaning of his life is, but rather must recognize that it is he who is asked. Each man is questioned by life and he can only answer to life by answering for his own life.

To life he can only respond by being responsible.” Nurse stated in an interview with Guyana Times Sunday Magazine .

“My recent collection, Man in the Mirror, is a reflection of my personal style with a twist. In the world we live in, one must face the harsh reality when it comes to being a man of style and sophistication. Sometimes it’s a mystery why men give so much interest into how the opposite sex looks rather than themselves. Personally, I believe men have an extra when it comes to being stylish; however many times due to fears, they hold that back. I believe in being bold and [being] who you are – men.”

Man is the Mirror is an exclusive clothing line that ranges from beach wear to formal clothing, and includes matching hats and bags. Nurse disclosed he would be adding more stylish pieces to the collection for the upcoming GFW 2013, scheduled for Oct 20-27.

For more information on Nurse’s collection and GFW 2013 call 2263099.

October 13, 2013

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M

ichel Teló is a Brazilian singer-songwriter. Before his solo act, he was a lead singer in various bands. The singer’s career began in 1987 when, as a six-year-old, he made his first solo performance in his school choir, singing a piece by Roberto Carlos and Erasmo Carlos. At 10, his musical talent blossomed when his father gave him an accordion. At the age of 12, upon encouragement by neighbours, school friends, and his brothers, he formed a young band for playing traditional music, which was called ‘Guri’ and served to strengthen Teló taste in music in a professional organized manner. He was the band's lead singer and composer. Besides his love for the harmonica, Teló also took piano lessons for 5 years. He was also dancer and played the accordion, harmonica, and guitar. His biggest international hit is “Ai Se Eu Te Pego”. The song is among the most played on world radio this year, and became a number one iTunes hit in countries such as Portugal, Italy, Spain, Germany, Poland, Argentina, Chile, Colombia and Peru. Teló is currently on tour in the United States promoting “Ai Se Eu Te Pego” in an English version entitled “Oh, If I Catch You”.

guyanatimesgy.com October 13, 2013

Star Times Hollywood

Times Sunday Magazine 11

12 Times Sunday Magazine

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October 13, 2013

Times Hollywood

Jay-Z signs Steven Spielberg’s Miley Cyrus opens up about her split with Liam children to Roc Nation

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n the month since Miley Cyrus and Liam Hemsworth ended their engagement, the singer has talked a lot about her new album, “Bangerz”, but very little about her breakup. Until now.

"I think people spend more time actually thinking about it than I really do," the "Wrecking Ball" singer says on Friday's The Ellen DeGeneres Show. "I just believe when a chapter is done, you have to close it and start that new one. That's kind of where I am right now."

Continues Cyrus: "I felt like people have really focused on my music right now when I've needed them to … that's the only thing I worried about. I didn't want it to make me sacrifice what I've been working for, for just the attention to be on [my breakup]".

In fact, Cyrus, 20, tells DeGeneres that she wants her music to speak for her and that the songs from Bangerz chronicle her up-and-down relationship with Hemsworth, 23, to whom she became engaged in 2012.

"Starting with 'Adore You' and ending with 'Someone Else,' I feel like you can really find like this arc of growth," the pop princess says. "This really is like telling a story.

I think I knew more intuitively where my life was going than I actually thought I did at the time."

Hemsworth, who is currently filming “The Hunger Games: Mockingjay” with Jennifer Lawrence, has yet to speak publicly about the breakup but was spotted in a passionate lip-lock with Mexican actress and singer Eiza Gonzalez just days after it was announced that he and Cyrus had called it quits.

For now, however, the singer says she is "obsessed with being alone."

T

"I want to be really clear and determined with everything I'm doing in my life right now ... I am genuinely happy, finally with myself," she says. "I think it takes you separating yourself from someone else to really be happy with who you are."

Cyrus then wraps things up on a contemplative note: "I've never just been able to be alone, and I'm obsessed with being alone and hearing my thoughts … I'm trying to take this alone time – the five minutes I do have a day – to learn as much as I can." (People)

he mogul is on the sign path.

Jay-Z has snapped up Steven Spielberg's kids, Wardell, for his label Roc Nation.

The pop duo, who comprise of Sasha and Theo Spielberg, join Rihanna and Kylie Minogue on the rapper's books.

The Roc Nation website states: "Sasha and Theo are brother and sister. That familiarity and fondness informs the music that they make together, which is at once warm and summery, comfortable and chill, as a result of their Los Angeles upbringing.

"It's the kind of music you'd expect from two people who grew up sharing a wall, infused with that particular intimacy that comes with a life spent knowing each other. And while they

draw from a wide range of influences, they have managed to create a sound that is wholly their own."

The pair released EP Brother/Sister via National Anthem earlier this year.

They are currently working on a debut album, which

‘Vampire Diaries’ star Kat Graham premieres new video for ‘Power’

Shia LaBeouf attacked in London?

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he man they call 'The Beef' was reportedly embroiled in a fight on a night out in London recently.

According to The Sun, Shia LaBeouf was out with friends in Leicester Square when he started filming two drunk women on his phone.

Witnesses allege that the actor refused to stop filming the pair, one of whom was being sick in the street.

A passer-by then took matters into his own hands and intervened, before punching LaBeouf in the face twice.

The report went on to claim that bouncers at a nearby club broke the scuffle up.

This isn't the first time the star has been caught up in a fight in the UK, either. LaBeouf got into hot water at a bar in London last year, after a man tried to grab his baseball cap off his head.

The star is currently on the promotional trail for Lars Von Trier's provocative new movie, Nymphomaniac. New posters for the film featuring a topless LaBeouf were released on Thursday. (Glamour)

Paris Hilton uses expletives on radio

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aris Hilton, who did not know that she was still on air, blasted a radio host following an interview. The "Nothing in This World" singer called into "Bob and the Showgram" on North Carolina's G105 station on Thursday morning, October 10 to promote her new song with Lil Wayne, "Good Time".

In the interview, the radio's VJ Bob Dumas also asked about her personal issues including her 2001 sex tape which was made with her ex-boyfriend Rick Salomon. When asked if she regretted making the x-rated video, Paris said, "Well, that was not anything to do with me. I just dated a person who was a very sick man."

The radio host also asked if she wanted to get married and have children. Paris calmly said, "Not now, but eventually I would like to. For right now I'm just really focusing on my work, my business and traveling."

After the interview ended, Paris immediately told a staff member, "That guy was a f**king a**hole, I'm never doing that show

again... They didn't even mention the song."

She apparently did not realize that she was still live. The staff answered, "I already put in a call to them, I can't believe they brought that c**p up." Bob and his co-host can be heard laughing hysterically after listening to Paris' conversation. (AceShowbiz)

is scheduled for a 2014 release.

Meanwhile, label boss Jay-Z is touring the UK on his Magna Carta World Tour, which culminates in a show at the O2 Arena in London from 14 October.

(Glamour)

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ans of "The Vampire Diaries" likely know that there's more to actress Kat Graham than Bonnie Bennett. The multi-talented performer already made her mark on the music world last year with her club hit "Put Your Graffiti On Me," and is now poised to release a debut album in the near future.

"Power" is the official lead single from the new project, and Yahoo Music is excited to offer the first look at the video for the tune — which is powerful indeed, filled with stunning imagery, much of it conceptualized by Graham herself.

Graham herself is excited about the clip, the looks of which she had a considerable hand in designing. "We shot this video a cou-

ple months ago in downtown Los Angeles.

When I heard this song, I knew that there were different looks to how I could present it. There was the vulnerable Rolla look, the black-and-white ode to '90s photography a la Herb Ritts, which we shot for the lyric video.

And then there was this fashion brave almost costume-y aspect to the song — a more literal take and a deeper characterization of the lyrics," Graham explained.

"I love producing, which is a fun fact that not many people know about me. So I had the idea to style myself," she added. "I wanted the visuals to match the lyrics. I thought that there was power in being naked with your emotions. Which is why we did the solid-gold look. It took two days to get that gold out of my hair," she noted.

"My second favorite look was the breast plate with the black backdrop. I worked with my best friend Alissah Brooks to create that breastplate from scratch, and we spray-painted it in my garage. Everything else was costume rental except for the headdress which is actually a shoulder piece that I created with Alissah — it’s a bunch of my necklaces sewn onto the shoulder pad that I had sewed gold buttons on to.

"I love working with creative people and this music video was no exception. I'm excited to debut this clip with Yahoo Music, and give my fans another take of this song."

(Yahoo)

Selena Gomez has a crush on Drake

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oodbye, Justin Bieber! Hello, Drake?

During an interview with The TJ Show on 103.3 AMP radio on Friday, Oct. 11, Selena Gomez revealed her new celebrity crush after splitting from Bieber last January.

The 21-year-old "Come & Get It" singer was in a tell-all mood while answering fan questions over the phone. "I just wanted to let you know that you're my boyfriend's guilty pleasure," one caller told Gomez.

"Actually, he's not even guilty about it. He sometimes refers to you as his baby. I was wondering if that makes you uncomfortable or are you flattered by that?"

The former Disney star said she was "super flattered" by it because she does it all the time as well -- with 36-year-old rapper Drake. "I'm like, 'Awww [Drake] did that for me,' when it's like, he did it on Twitter," Gomez confessed. "I'm like, 'My baby did that for me!'"

When radio hosts TJ and Loren suggested she and Drake should date, Gomez said she doesn't think she's his type.

"No," she said. "And I mean this in the

nicest way, I just don't have a big enough butt for Drake."

During a Sept. 20 appearance on The Ellen DeGeneres Show, the "Started from the Bottom" rapper was quizzed about his dating history. Drake admitted that he's dated Rihanna, loves Nicki Minaj but hasn't been "intimate" with her, went on a Disneyland date with Tyra Banks, had dinner with his celeb crush Kat Dennings and denied dating Kim Kardashian.

As for his current relationship status?

"I'm single," he said. "I'm ready to mingle!"

(US Magazine)

A

rchana Vijaya is a model, video jockey and television presenter.

She started off as a model and then was a video jockey with Channel V in India and is now a television presenter. Vijaya's career started in 2004 when she won Channel V's “Get Gorgeous” in 2004 and became a video jockey on the channel, hosting season two of “Get Gorgeous” in 2005. While with Channel V, Vijaya hosted travel shows like “Freedom Express 1 and 2”, in which she interacted with people from various strata of the society. Later, Neo Sports hired her to host the show “Tour Diary”, which featured Vijaya traveling with the Indian Cricket Team and the visiting team to India at their playing destinations.

She entered the modeling world by walking the ramp for designer Suneet Varma at the Milan Fashion Week. Since then she has simultaneously modeled in Fashion with all the leading designers - Tarun Tahiliani, Rohit Bal, Narendra Kumar, Sabyasachi, Manish Malhotra and many more. As a model, her advertising campaigns include Parker Pen 2012, Cuticura and Toyota Corolla, Frooti, L'Oréal, Samsung Mobile, Nike.

guyanatimesgy.com October 13, 2013

Star Times Bollywood

Times Sunday Magazine 13

14 Times Sunday Magazine

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October 13, 2013

Times Bollywood

Amitabh Bachchan to turn 102 next year!

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egastar Amitabh Bachchan, who turned 71 on Friday, will be playing a centenarian on screen in filmmaker Umesh Shukla's next, which is said to be titled “102 Not Out”.

On Bachchan's birthday, producer Bhushan Kumar of T-Series announced his new project with him. The film will see Big B as a 102-year-old man.

"I am happy to be part of it. It is Umesh Shukla's story that T-series is making. And we will start shooting for it next year. I can't talk about the story as it will be like giving out too many details. Paresh Rawal will also be there in the film," Bachchan told reporters here.

The film is about an old man who decides to break the world record of longevity. Big B will be playing the lead in the film, showing how to live a full life.

Shukla's last outing “Oh My God”, with Akshay Kumar and Paresh Rawal, was a hit.

On whether he is doing “Welcome Back”, Bachchan said, "No one has informed me about it yet. No one has come to me with it (offer)."

The makers of the sequel to “Welcome Back” have been saying they are keen to have the megastar for the role of RDX, which was earlier essayed by late Feroz Khan.

M

ichael Jackson’s “This Is It” held the Guinness World Record for being the largest poster in the world. Akshay Kumar’s upcoming film “Boss” breaks that record.

The actor's fan club, Team Akshay, put together logistics into place and work made the special poster of “Boss” aiming to make it the largest poster in the world.

The poster was completed in four months.

The largest poster in the world was unveiled at Little Gransden Airfield, Little Gransden, UK, on October 03, 2013. Macro Arts (UK) did the manufacturing of the poster. Incidentally, Macro Arts is the same company that made Michael Jackson’s poster.

The world’s largest poster of “Boss” is 58.87 metres wide and 54.94 metres high.

When the Guinness officials came to measure it, it was recorded that the poster beat Michael Jackson’s record by a 15-20 percent margin.

The official certification for the same was done in the

UK and the Boss poster also finds a mention on the official Guinness website.

Reacting to the development, Akshay Kumar said,

"It's a matter of honor. I thank everyone who made this possible." (Hindustan Times)

Aishwarya Rai Bachchan inaugurates new stem cell bank in Mumbai

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ishwarya Rai Bachchan recently launched the world's most affordable stem cell bank, initiated by LifeCell, in Mumbai.

The 39-year-old actress had earlier banked her daughter Aaradhya's stem cells after her birth, with the biotechnology company. "This association has a direct contact with very important personal decision in my life. I have heard a lot about stem cell banking, read up extensively on it. I even spoke to my doctors about it," she said.

While explaining her decision to preserve her daughter's stem cells, Aishwarya said that she took the decision after talking to her husband, Abhishek Bachchan, and their respective families. (Hindustan Times)

H

rithik Roshan has said that he used positive thinking to deal with having emergency brain surgery.

The “Krrish 3” star developed a blood clot after a head injury during the filming of “Bang Bang”.

He told The Times of India: "Talking about the brain surgery, I could have stacked that up and thought that I started with a speech impediment, have a knee problem and don't have a cartilage, my back is bad,

Meanwhile, Bachchan, who was shooting for “Bhootnath 2” recently, bumped into actors Salman Khan and Tabu at a studio here.

"I have met him (Salman) on couple of occasions. They were shooting for their new film in the adjoining sets... met them. I had heard he was not well so asked him about health," Bachchan added. (India Today)

my shoulder is broken and now I have a hole in my head. That could have stacked up in a negative way.

"I said to myself this is it. And I need to deal with it now. I got into action. The only two things in my control were, one, information and I found out everything I could within the few hours of discovering I had a problem and two, finding the best doctors," the actor said.

"After that I lay back and enjoyed myself even on the operating table. I saw blood come out three feet in the air once they drilled the hole in my head. I was on local anesthesia as I wanted to be awake and wanted my mind to have that experience. I was even singing songs, negotiating with the doctor saying, 'Don't make another hole'.

"I will cough all the blood you want through one hole itself by applying more pressure. Because of my choice to stay awake, I feel I have only one hole, which actually could have been two if I was asleep."

The 39-year-old admitted this week that getting into costume for his role in “Krrish 3” made him feel invincible.

It was reported after his surgery that he had been asked to write an inspirational book by his friends. (Digital Spy)

Karan Johar: 'Shah Rukh and I have the best chemistry'

K

aran Johar has said that he shares a special connection with actor Shah Rukh Khan.

The producer and director has collaborated with Shah Rukh Khan since the 1998 comedy “Duplicate”.

He told The Times of India: "Shah Rukh and I have the best director-actor chemistry anyone can have. He knows it, I know it, we know it. Every time we come together, we will make a magical movie. He knows my beats as a filmmaker and I know his, as an actor.

The way we understand each other, I don't think I will be able to have that tuning with any other actor.

"We will work together when I write that script for him that not only warrants his superstardom, but also a film that he has not done before."

In May, Johar said that Shah Rukh Khan is part of the last generation of Bollywood film actors who will be worshipped by fans.

The 41-year-old, who

has become associated with more art house cinema, said that he had to stop working with Khan in order to make “Bombay Talkies”. (Digital Spy)

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October 13, 2013

Times Sunday Magazine

15

Times Healthy Living

What causes relationship problems?

By Dr Yeaswantie Beekhoo PhD

Perception and Expectation

You can examine your present relationship. As you come to recognize that there is a problem, you would be able to get to the root cause of your relationship issues. Without admitting that there is a problem, there cannot be a solution.

Ask yourself what is affecting you? What is it you are learning from your relationship? If you are unable to answer those two questions, my advice is to seek professional assistance; there are many different resources out there to assist you if you are ready to understand the benefits of your relationship problems.

There are a number of patterns and situations that can develop within a relationship which will contribute to problems occurring, such as past experience, insecurity, and low self-esteem, among others.

Neglect of the relationship

Research shows that the foundation of a happy relationship is friendship. Put simply, this means that you can enjoy each other's company, share values, interests, friends and extended family. However, without chemistry, the relationship will not complete your needs. And when there are un-

met needs, there is conflict within one’s system.

We show compassion to help our partner, but sometimes when you find that you are being compassionate and giving all the support - ask yourself: what is it you are doing, are you trying to convince yourself that you love the person you are with or do you believe it will help you to understand that the propose for which you are here, is to be supportive?

Understanding is needed in everything: without understanding, there would be no togetherness in any relationship. You become a team when you say “I do”.

There are times when relationships need to be nurtured, if it is not, you will find that each other’s needs will be neglected and inevitably deteriorate. That is why couples need to be regularly spending time together, doing things, talking about things that matter to each other, and making plans for the future.

This seems obvious, but work pressures and other personal issues, the demands of parenting, and the general busyness of life mean that we too easily put off spending the necessary time together to stay connected; as a result couples drift apart. This is often the case for high achievers, parents of teenagers, or ‘empty nesters' who have neglected their relationship earlier on. (TO BE CONTINUED)

Beauty

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using a leave-in conditioner that contains zinc oxide or wearing a wide-brimmed hat.

10. Brushing your hair 100 strokes a day or tugging on your hair to style it Changes that can help prevent hair damage: Brush and comb your hair only to style it. Hair never needs 100 brush strokes a day. That’s a myth.

Use a wide-tooth comb, and use it gently to comb your hair.

Avoid pulling and tugging on your hair as you brush, comb, or style it.

n our quest for beautiful hair, we often do things that damage our hair.

Damaged hair is fragile, so it tends to break. Hair breakage can leave us with frizzy, unhealthy looking hair. If we continue to damage our hair, we may eventually see thinning hair or even bald spots.

The good news is that simple changes can prevent further hair damage...

Hair-care habits that can damage your hair

1. Washing your hair by rubbing shampoo into the length of your hair Changes that can help prevent hair damage: Gently massage shampoo into your scalp.

When you rinse the shampoo from your scalp, let it flow through the length of your hair and resist the temptation to rub it into your hair.

2. Skipping the conditioner Changes that can help prevent hair damage: Use conditioner after every shampoo.

3. Drying your hair by rubbing it with a towel Changes that can help prevent hair damage: Wrap your hair in a towel to absorb the water.

Let your hair air dry.

4. Brushing your hair while it is wetChanges that can help prevent hair damage: Do you have straight hair? Let your hair dry a bit before you gently comb it with a wide-tooth comb.

Do you have textured hair or tight curls? Always comb your hair while it is damp, using a wide-tooth comb.

5. Using a blow dryer, hot comb, or curling iron Changes that can help prevent hair damage: Let your hair air dry when possible.

Use the lowest heat setting.

Limit the time a hot comb or curling iron touches your hair.

Use these tools less frequently, aiming for once a week — or even less often.

6. Applying styling products that offer long-lasting hold Changes that can help prevent hair damage: Try a hairstyle that does not require this product.

7. Pulling your hair back tightly, such as in a ponytail, bun, or cornrows

Changes that can help prevent hair damage: Wear hair loosely pulled back.

Use covered rubber bands made especially for styling hair.

Try a different hairstyle that does not pull on your hair.

8. Wearing a weave or hair extensions Changes that can help prevent hair damage: Wear weaves and extensions that are light, so they do not pull.

Get weaves and hair extensions at a salon that specializes in these services.

Wear a professional weave or hair extension for 2 or 3 months at most.

Keep up your scalp hygiene when wearing a weave or hair extension.

Switch hairstyles, so you don’t always wear a weave or hair extensions.

9. Colouring, perming, or relaxing your hairChanges that can help prevent hair damage: Try to add more time between touchups, especially when the air is dry.

Have only one service — a colouring, relaxer, or perm. If you want more than one service, perm or relax your hair first, and do it 2 weeks before you colour your hair.

Use conditioner after each shampoo.

When in the sun, protect your hair by

Remove tangles gently, using a moisturizing conditioner if necessary.

When to see a dermatologist

If changing how you care for your hair does not help you see healthier hair, you may want to see a dermatologist. Your hair care may not be the root cause of your problem. Seeing a dermatologist is especially important if you are concerned about thinning hair or hair loss. Most causes can be stopped or treated. The sooner the problem is addressed, the better your results. (American Academy of Dermatology, www.aad.org)

16 Times Sunday Magazine

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October 13, 2013

Times Home & Cooking

Fragrant pork & rice one-pot Ingredients 4-6 good-quality sausages 1 tbsp olive oil ½ onion, finely chopped 2 garlic cloves, crushed

A reader’s space

Invisible bookshelves can stack up to 15lbs (or 8inches) of small to medium books to create an eye-catching display

Avid readers can soon run out of space to put their books. Bookshelves not only provide storage and display space in nearly any room but can also enhance your home decor.

If you love books and love the idea of displaying your most treasured copies, make your bookshelf a focal point in your room by following these tips.

Frame a doorway with a bookshelf and it becomes a creative use of usually wasted space

2 tsp each ground cumin and coriander 140g long grain rice 850ml vegetable stock 400g can chopped tomatoes ½ small bunch coriander, leaves picked

Method: Split the sausage skins, squeeze out the meat, then roll it into small meatballs about the size of a large olive.

Heat the oil in a large nonstick saucepan, then brown the meatballs well on all sides until cooked – you might need to do this in batches. Set the meatballs aside.

Add the onion and garlic to the pan. Soften for 5 mins, stir in the spices and rice, then cook for another min. Pour in the stock and tomatoes. Bring to a simmer, scraping up any sausage bits from the bottom of the pan. Simmer for 10 mins until the rice is just cooked, then stir in the meatballs with some seasoning. Ladle into bowls, scatter with coriander and serve with crusty bread.

Garlic Cheddar Chicken

Ingredients: 1/2 cup butter 4 cloves garlic, minced 3/4 cup dry bread crumbs 1/2 cup freshly grated Parmesan cheese 1 1/2 cups shredded Cheddar cheese

1/4 teaspoon dried parsley 1/4 teaspoon dried oregano 1/4 teaspoon ground black pepper 1/8 teaspoon salt 8 skinless, boneless chicken breast halves - pounded thin

Method: Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C).

Melt the butter in a saucepan over low heat, and cook the garlic until tender, about 5 minutes.

In a shallow bowl, mix the bread crumbs, Parmesan cheese, Cheddar cheese, parsley, oregano, pepper, and salt.

Dip each chicken breast in the garlic butter to coat, then press into the bread crumb mixture. Arrange the coated chicken breasts in a 9x13 inch baking dish. Drizzle with any remaining butter and top with any remaining bread crumb mixture.

Bake 30 minutes in the preheated oven, or until chicken is no longer pink and juices run clear. (Makes 8 servings)

Greatest Cooking Tips

A floor to ceiling corner bookshelf overlooking a comfy chair and reading lamp is every booklover’s paradise

Pre-soak pasta and it will cook in about 60 seconds. Soak the pasta in water in a sealed bag for a couple hours or overnight. Then you can cook it super fast in boiling water or just add it straight to a hot sauce in a pan and let it finish cooking there.

Tougher cuts of beef and pork are a lot cheaper than steaks and chops, but no one wants to eat a piece of leather for dinner. The best way to cook tough cuts of meat: cook them low and slow, usually for 3 or more hours, often in liquid, to make them melt-in-your-mouth tender.

Home Help

Don't throw out the kitchen sponge that smells like last night's fish dish. Soak it in water spiked with white vinegar or lemon juice, and then heat it in your microwave on high for 1 minute. (Use an oven mitt to remove it.) This will also disinfect any sponges you used to wipe up the juices from raw chicken.

Certain items are at their prime when stored at room temperature. Don’t store bread in the refrigerator since it dries the bread out fast. Instead, keep what you’ll eat within four days at room temperature and freeze the rest. Tomatoes can get spotted in the fridge, so leave them on a counter, out of plastic bags. To speed ripening, store in a paper bag. Once ripe, they’ll last for about three days.

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October 13, 2013

Times Sunday Magazine 17

Times Sunday Puzzle

I have 18 gallons of water shared unequally between three buckets. Then I: 1. Pour three quarters of the water in bucket 1 into bucket 2.

2. Pour half of the water now in bucket 2 into bucket 3.

3. Pour a third of the water now in bucket 3 into bucket 1.

Now, all of the buckets contain equal amounts of water. How much water did each bucket start with? see solution on page 22

see solution on page 22

see solution on page 22

18 Times Sunday Magazine

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October 13, 2013

Times Creative Writing

If

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By the time the party came, Polly was very good, and let the girls play with her beautiful doll the whole time

olly ought to have been a very happy little girl, but she was not, because she hadn't a doll. She had everything else: a beautiful kitchen, a stove with everything to use on it, some pretty china dishes, a table to put them on, and a neat little wicker chair to match the table.

Only a little while ago she had three lovely dolls; but there was another D to Polly's name—Destructive Polly; and now there was not a bit of a dolly left, and mamma had determined to let her wait till she wanted one so very much that when it did come she would be sure to take care of it.

But Aunt Alice said, one day, "That child shall have a doll to-morrow."

And sure enough, the next morning, in the little wicker chair, Polly found the most beautiful doll she had ever seen.

It had fluffy, golden hair, and bright blue eyes, and a dress just like Polly's best one with

puffed sleeves. It could say "papa" and "mamma" quite plainly, and could move its eyes.

Of course, the first thing to be done was to find a name for the new treasure, and that made Polly discontented again.

She wanted to call it after herself, but she said, "Polly is such an every-day name, it would never do; my doll must have a 'company' name." So she called her doll "Rosalinda."

The next day, mamma said there might be a party in honour of the new doll; so Polly carried Rosalinda into the play-room, put her in the little chair, and began to get ready for the party. Rosalinda looked as though she would like to help; so Polly filled one of her prettiest cups with milk, and put it in the dolly's lap, while she went out for three lumps of sugar.

Just then a dreadful thing happened. Puss, who had been hidden under a chair, came out, jumped to Rosalinda's lap, and began to drink the

milk as fast as he could.

Before it was half gone he heard Polly coming, so he jumped down again in a hurry, and out of the window. But one hind paw caught the cup by the handle, spilled the milk on dolly's dress, dashed the cup to the floor, and broke it all to bits!

When Polly came in and saw this, what do you think she did? She just looked at Rosalinda a moment, then she took her out of the chair and shook her—shook her so hard, and sat her down again with such a bounce that the pretty blue eyes shut up tight, and wouldn't come open.

Polly didn't mind that at first. She said, "Yes! You’d better shut your eyes, you naughty thing!

Don't tell me it was “a accidence.” You did it yourself, I know, and I don't love you one bit. You don't look fit to be seen, and the party will be here before I'm ready. Oh, dear! Just open your eyes, and see what you've done."

But poor Rosalinda's eyes wouldn't open, and the more Polly shook her, the tighter shut they stayed, till she ran, crying, to mamma, to ask for help.

Mamma had seen it all; so now she took Polly and Rosalinda both on her lap, and gave what Polly called "a little preach."

It did her good, real good, and at last she said: "Dear mamma, if Rosalinda will only open her eyes once more and look at me, I believe I will never be so naughty again."

So mamma found a way to open the pretty blue eyes, and Polly kissed them both, and then kissed mamma for helping her.

By the time the party came, everything was ready. Polly was very good, and let the girls play with her beautiful Rosalinda the whole time. I do not know how long the good will last. I hope till every one forgets to call her Discontented Polly, and learns to call her Darling Polly instead.

If you can keep your head when all about you Are losing theirs and blaming it on you, If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you, But make allowance for their doubting too; If you can wait and not be tired by waiting, Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies, Or being hated, don’t give way to hating, And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise: If you can dream — and not make dreams your master; If you can think — and not make thoughts your aim; If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster And treat those two impostors just the same; If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools, Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken, And stoop and build ’em up with worn-out tools: If you can make one heap of all your winnings And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss, And lose, and start again at your beginnings And never breathe a word about your loss; If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew To serve your turn long after they are gone, And so hold on when there is nothing in you Except the Will which says to them: “Hold on!”

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue, Or walk with Kings — nor lose the common touch, If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you, If all men count with you, but none too much; If you can fill the unforgiving minute With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run, Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it, And — which is more — you’ll be a Man, my son!

Rudyard Kipling

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October 13, 2013

Times Sunday Magazine19

Times World

The price of creating a connected future E

Future generations will live in a world more connected in almost every way. Author Tad Williams asks how this connected world will change both our societies and ourselves as individuals

very major technological step forward has profoundly changed human society – that's how we know they're major, even if we don't always realise it at the time. Farming created cities. Writing, followed eventually by printing, vastly increased the preservation and transmission of cultural information across time and space.

Now we stand at the beginning of the greatest synergy yet between human beings and their innovations – the reinvention of Homo sapiens from the inside out by our own science. To paraphrase JBS Haldane's famous remark about the universe, the future won't be merely stranger than you imagine, it will be stranger than you can imagine.

We are social animals, but as the dangers of being different have diminished since we started (the presence of large predators can do a lot to compel uniformity) individualism has become a greater and greater force in our societies and ourselves. Modern technology is one big reason, and two very powerful forces are now rapidly altering the dynamics of self-versus-society – monofocus and the transfer of allegiance from vertical societies to more fluid, horizontal groups.

Many nations and religions started as shared ideas, even as true horizontal social groups, but as those institutions grew and changed, the agreements between people began to blur. In America, liberal Christians have more in common with liberal atheists than they do with their fundamentalist Christian brethren – so what's an "American Christian"? But a bluegrass fan always likes bluegrass music, whether he or she lives in Tennessee or Tunisia. An idea without official borders can shift to fit the changing expectations of its adherents. Nations and religions are a lot less flexible.

But even as we re-jig our loyalties toward more personal interests like green politics, gun ownership, buying and restoring old furniture, or following international lacrosse, and we build political coalitions across national and other boundaries, the rapid changes in technology will allow us to do more than merely share information.

We will soon be able to share first-person points of view, vision, and sounds.

With improvements in haptic technology (virtual touch) we'll even be able to share how things actually feel. If you're interested in

mountaineering, soon you'll be able to walk in the trudging footsteps of a Sherpa as he summits Mount Everest.

and getting instant feedback. Have a problem with allergies or other dietary intolerances? You'll know

al selfhood and the doings and thoughts of like-minded folk in minute, constant detail, we will be changing

culture like gets harder the danger society will

You'll freefall with skydivers, and talk to Amazon River indigenes as though you were there. And you'll be able to stand with protesters in the streets and see and experience what they do, from thousands of miles away.

The change in perspective won't stop there.

Technological shifts are moving us closer to our own physical selves as well.

what's in that packaged food as soon as you pick it up, long before you buy it, let alone put it in your mouth.

This capability to receive personally important information at all times will also drive legislation and politics. If you can get these services, most people will want them whether they can pay for them or not, especially those that improve survival, and the pressure to provide this data to everyone will be as large as any of the struggles over other kinds of healthcare: Why should only rich people have builtin heart monitor/fibrillators that will save them in the event of a coronary?

into another kind of human society.

Unless technology itself is drastically repressed, the idea of the dystopian mono-

connected society of mirrorwatchers and navel-gazers.

Some say we have more to fear than merely excessive self-involvement. Social

Data hunter gatherers

Smart phones are only a technological way-station, although they will linger well into the late century and find unexpected uses in less wealthy areas. In the industrialised world, we'll move toward increasingly personalised methods of carrying our computing power around with us. By the middle of the 21st Century, even if we haven't got direct neural shunts yet, smart goggles and lenticular implants and other input/output devices will probably have replaced phones for most techcurrent users.

In fact, our technology will help us to stay healthy in a million new ways. We'll know pollen counts in different localities, and other stress-factors waiting unseen. We'll know if we're walking in front of a speeding car or into a dark alley where another heat-signature suggests someone's waiting to mug us. In the grocery store, we will be scanning every new item purchased for its personal safety and appropriateness

Self-made bubbles

When we combine this personalisation of information with the growing importance of our horizontal social groupings, then add in the increasing connectivity our technology is already bringing us, we will begin to see an entirely different sort of human species developing, globally interconnected and intimately self-aware (although possibly a little distracted).

Is there a dark side to this world of greater personal freedom and greater self-investment? Of course.

As we (or at least our immediate descendants) spend our heroically individuated lives swimming through bubble worlds sprung from our own selves, living in our own created universes, surrounded by the constantly updated facts of our person-

Orwell's “1984” to believe. But of a solipsistic grow, of a dis-

critics feared we were moving toward Balkanised islands of like-minded folk even before the internet.

Recent studies on group polarisation in cyberspace suggest that this era of mass communication only makes this worse – that we become more extreme in like-minded groups, more contemptuous of differing viewpoints, than we are as individuals.

Our challenge in the coming century will be to resist hiding in the comfort of these self-made bubbles, to remember that there will also be a growing number of other bubbles, large and small, and each one will contain people who feel just as strongly as we do about their own individual truths, passions, and needs.

For all our differences, we are sharing the same planet. It may be difficult, but we will still need to hear what we don't want to hear, sometimes from people we don't like. We will still need to think about others, and not just ourselves. In fact, as the old ways disappear, we humans will need to find entirely new ways to be neighbours.

Or, as poet ee cummings once put it, "there's a hell of a good universe next door; let's go..." (BBC Future)

20 Times Sunday Magazine

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October 13, 2013

Times Tech

Why the iPhone 5S is a winner Review: Why the iPhone 5S is the 'best smartphone ever made' and the colourful iPhone 5C 'doesn't feel cheap'

Part II

A

pple launched its iPhone 5s and cheaper iPhone 5c handsets as people queued outside their stores across the globe, with the gold model of the 5s most popular, selling out in certain regions online and in stores.

The phones are now in such demand that some have appeared on eBay for three times their retail value, while others are being blatantly re-sold on the black market outside shops with high mark ups.

But do they live up to the hype?

Technology journalist MARK PRIGG in San Francisco reviews both models...

While still an 8 megapixel camera, Apple has increased the size of the sensor and the pixels, giving pictures a noticeable boost in quality.

The camera actually takes four images in quick succession, taking the best bits from each to form a key image with all the best bits, which is then shown to the user.

In use, it’s great and pictures are sharper, with more clarity and depth than those taken with the iPhone 5c or iPhone 5, and there is a range of new features such as a ‘square’ mode for instagram snaps and a panoramic mode.

The flash is also a vast improvement, as it now uses smart software to create a coloured flash designed to look images look more realistic.

There are also some neat new tricks, such as burst mode, which captures a quick succession of pics, and for video, a slo-mo mode which looks superb, capturing video at 120fps and allowing you to control the speed of capture using an on screen button.

It’s definitely an evolution of the iPhone 5, but the 5S does more than enough to warrant an upgrade.

The fingerprint sensor alone is a huge timesaver, and also an added layer of security desperately needed on modern devices - as Apple itself admitted that 50 per cent of iPhone 5 owners don’t even

have a passcode.

Over the coming months app developers are expected to really get to grips with the power of the iPhone 5s and its 64bit chip, so while most apps look and work the same as they always have today, look out for some amazing new games and fitness apps taking full advantage of the power of the iPhone 5s - and showing this really is a major update for Apple.

Overall, the 5s is a winner, and the best smartphone on the market - the biggest question seems to be not should you buy one, but which colour should you go for.

IPhone 5C: It Might be Plastic but It 'Doesn't Feel Cheap'

It’s been written off as the lower cost, lower spec handset and just an iPhone 5 in a new case.

However, Apple's colourful new iPhone 5c is a perfect example of how the hi-tech world and its outspoken Apple-bashers can miss the point.

The iPhone 5c isn’t as advanced as the 5s, Apple’s flagship

new handset. But pick one up, and you’ll instantly realise why the 5c is set to become Apple’s biggest selling iPhone to date.

Put simply, it’s fun. The five colours are brash and the curved feel of the device - despite being made of plastic - is superbly engineered to give a solid feeling.

Technically, the iPhone 5c is pretty much identical to the iPhone 5, that was until today, Apple’s flagship handset. The processor and most of the innards are pretty much the same and that’s no bad thing.

The iPhone 5c really isn’t about technical specs though; those who worry about such things will buy the 5s, with its fingerprint sensor and 64bit processor.

For the rest of the world, who really don’t care about tech specs and just want an easy-to-use phone that looks good and can be customised to suit their taste, the iPhone 5c is perfect.

Terming the 5c a plastic iPhone seems harsh after you’ve picked it up as this really doesn’t feel cheap in any way.

‘Made in Nigeria’ Mobile Phones to Be Launched in November P

lans have reached advanced stage to launch two new Made-in-Nigeria mobile phone brands into the nation's booming telephony market later this year, the Phone and Allied Products Dealers Association (PAPDAN) has disclosed.

President of PAPDAN, Mr Godfrey Iyke Nwosu, who disclosed the plan in Lagos, said that the Made in Nigeria phone brand is the outcome of a joint venture among 20 Nigerian investors who have pooled resources to introduce devices that will cater for the local market needs.

The two new phone brands will be called iQ and MaxTel, says Nwosu, who

made this disclosure at the inaugural edition of the monthly Technopreneurship Breakfast Meeting hosted by Technology Times for business leaders and SMBs in Lagos.

A statement from Technology Times' publisher Shina Badaru quoted Nwosu as saying that PAPDAN has identified a growing appetite for cutting-edge technologies among Nigerian telecoms consumers. He also says that two Nigerian brands will cater to three market segments in the feature, medium and smart phone segments to offer choice to consumers.

There are five colours available - white, red, yellow, blue and green. Coated with lacquer, they also seem extremely resilient, coping with the odd drop without leaving a mark (and rather unfortunately, I’ve dropped my yellow handset more than once - but it shows no sign of damage).

Apple believes people may even buy more than one in differ-

ent colours and for the more affluent consumers, that’s probably true.

Crucially for the vast ecosystem that surround Apple products, the 5c is also a massive payday for case makers, so expect some lovely and some truly awful novelty to appear.

The iPhone 5c has a 4-inch Retina display which is sharp and clear and Apple’s older, A6 chip (which is found in the iPhone 5) alongside an 8 megapixel camera and an updated front-facing camera for FaceTime and taking irritating selfies. It’ll also work on all of the UK 4G networks.

The price is the only issue for some, who were expecting a ‘cheap’ iPhone - but remember, Apple just doesn’t do cheap.

The 5c is a new take on the iPhone and one that will hugely expand Apple’s reach.

It’s a quality product with some astonishing engineering, which in many ways feels nicer than the 5s in use as the curved edges really make a difference.

While the critics may sneer at its colours and plastic, the proof is set to be in the sales figures and I fully expect Apple to once again show it has an unparalleled handle of what consumers, rather than spec-obsessed technical experts, want.

guyanatimesgy.com

October 13, 2013

Times Sunday Magazine 21

Times Art

Digital sculptor/3D character artist Damien Abdool is living his dreams, with his name rolling in the credits of record-breaking Hollywood movies claimed artist, who has been into the digital art industry for seven years, has worked with Digital Domain, an American visual effects and digital production company, for almost two years on gargantuan movies such as “Jack the Giant Slayer”, “Thor” and soon-to-be-released science fiction action film “Ender’s Game”.

He went on a hiatus from films to work on a project with Microsoft for the X-Box One. After completing his work for Microsoft, he then decided to return to Digital Domain to work on the highly anticipated “X-Men” sequel, scheduled for release next year: “X-Men: Days of Future Past”.

“I can’t tell you exactly what I’m doing until it’s released. All I can say is that my usual role is character art. To work with such a big production is

A

great! I work with a very talented team on something that inspired me so much as I was growing up.

“X-Men” has always epitomized amazing fantasy for me,” the artist said, enthused.

He disclosed that he had the pleasure to meet, on a few previous occasions, some of the acting talent involved in the productions he worked on. One such instance was during the production of “Fight Night 4” and “Champion at EA”, Damien felt privileged to meet international boxing champions Shane Mosely, Sergio Mora and Lennox Lewis – just to name a few.

The artist noted that he enjoys any production that challenges him and allows him to further himself when it comes to character art. He added that he would like to take all that he has learnt and apply it

to some of his own creative story driven endeavours.

“For me inspiration comes in many forms.

Listening to an amazing musician, watching a great athlete or something totally unrelated to art, inspire me to try to be as good as I can at what I do.

My parents always stood by my decision to be a professional artist and I think that really gave me the drive to follow it through.

A lot of the challenges associated with my job have been encountered by commercial artists alike for a very long time. Luckily, careful observation of theory, technique and trends throughout the industry prepares me for any challenge,” he related.

Damien’s encouragement for youths who want to follow a similar path as he did is to “Find what you love and practice it until you are blue in the face.”

Digital sculptor Damien Abdool

fter finishing A Levels in Guyana, Damien Abdool moved to Toronto, Canada, where he pursued a post graduate 3D programme at Humber College where he graduated with honours.

Shortly thereafter, he moved to Vancouver where he furthered his studies at the Vancouver Film School and once again graduated with honours.

In an interview with Guyana Times Sunday Magazine, Damien said that growing up, he was always fascinated by fantasy in whatever form he could find: comic books, movies, video games, to name a few.

“My father,” he recalled, “was the main culprit in getting me hooked. He would always tell me stories and draw pictures of superheroes and creatures.

As a son I tried my best to copy him, and found out that I had a natural aptitude towards sculpting and drawing.”

This passion, fuelled by his father, led him to become a recognised

digital sculptor/3D character artist for film and videogames in the glitzy world of Hollywood. His job ranges from replicating very realistic humans to entirely animated creatures, with 3D software.

“If I had to boil it down to one thing, I would say I enjoy problem-solving. It can come in many forms when you do 3D, whether it is applying some artistic theory to enhance the quality of a model to find-

ing the most efficient way to construct something.

I also just love sculpting!” the artist mentioned of what he loves about his work.

The young a c -

Detailed digital work sculpted by Damien for "Jack the Giant Slayer"

It was a proud moment to see his name mentioned in the credit for "Jack the Giant Slayer"

22 Times Sunday Magazine

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October 13, 2013

Times Heritage

St. Matthews Church. Constructed by the Presbyterians and opened November 25, 1898

O

Christianburg Water Wheel. Installed in 1855 to facilitate the operations of a saw mill owned and operated by John Dalgleish Patterson

n April 29, 1970, under the Municipal District Council's Act of 1969, Macmarburg, a diminutive for Mackenzie, Wismar and Christianburg, was renamed Linden and officially declared a town.

Christianburg, the oldest settlement in the town, was originally known as Stabroek. It was renamed in honour of Governor Christian Finette, who joined his name with Burg, his wife's family name. This area was chiefly used for rubber bleeding and saw milling.

The area south of Christianburg was known as Shingles Landing, because of the production of shingles and wallaba posts (a local hardwood). Before the discovery of hardwood, this area was an important transit point in gold and diamond mining.

In 1916, with the discovery of bauxite all economic activity in the town was focused on Mackenzie, on the opposite side of the Berbice River.

Today Linden is popularly known as the Mining Town.

There are several historical sites scattered throughout this town that are representative of the diversity of Guyana's heritage. (National Trust of Guyana website)

Brain Teaser Answer We can solve this problem by starting at the end and working backwards.

Obviously, at the end each bucket will contain 6 gallons of water. Call the buckets B1, B2 and B3.

If pouring a third of the water in B3 at the time into B1 leaves 6 in each, then B3 must have 9 at the time and B1 3.

If pouring half of B2 at the time into B3 at the time leaves 6 in B2 and 9 in B3, then B2 must contain 12 at the time and B3 contain 3. So B3 started with 3 gallons in.

If pouring three quarters of B1 at the time into B2 at the time leaves B1 with 3 and B2 with 12, then B1 had 12 and B2 had 3.

So B1 started with 12 and B2 and B3 both started with 3.

Watooka House. Constructed in the late 19th century, the Watooka House timber shutters and jalousie windows are examples of Guyana's traditional wooden architecture

KID SUDOKU

SUDOKU

Preserving our heritage through pictures CROSSWORD

Section of Georgetown, British Guiana

guyanatimesgy.com

October 13, 2013

Times Sunday Magazine 23

Times Travel & Tourism

P

rominent white sand greets you even before noticing the “Welcome to Waramuri” sign at the riverside entrance to the village.

The village of Waramuri is located on the right bank of the Moruca River, about 10 miles from the mouth of the Moruca River, and about a 45 minutes motor boat ride from Charity.

It can be accessed mainly by river, but the regional administration has upgraded the road from Santa Rosa to Waramuri, which now makes it accessible from Santa Rosa via road – just about a 20-minute quiet trail ride. Santa Rosa

Entering Waramuri

can also be accessed by aircraft.

Waramuri, a Warrau word, took its name from a black ant – called “Waramuri ant” in the interior – which, elders say, had infested the village when early settlers arrived there more than a century ago.

Waramuri is a predominantly Warrau village, but there is a mix of other tribal heritages.

It was established around the 1800s by the Anglican Church.

In 1835 the first Anglican priest, Reverend Nowers, came to Waramuri. There were several other expatriate priests before locals took

up the mantle. Reverend John Benette was among the first Amerindian priests to serve the parish.

At the time, the church managed the school, and REA Semple was its first head-teacher. He led the community during the period of colonial rule, while David Peters was the first local Amerindian teacher to serve the community.

Waramuri is home to a legendary shell mound.

The shells are barely visible, having been overtaken by other gravel and green vegetation.

It is indeed an adventure to visit the historic village of Waramuri.

The boat landing

Waramuri nursery school

A section of Waramuri village

A view of the access dam from the sandy mound at Waramuri

24

Times Sunday Magazine

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October 13, 2013

Times Last Laugh

Slithery Immigrants Pose Serious Threat to America

By Melvin Durai

I

was watching a documentary on PBS the other day and came to the realization that America is not doing enough to control the population of a certain group that keeps sneaking into the country and causing trouble. This is a growing problem in Florida and could become a major problem in the rest of the country, unless immigration laws are tightened to keep these slithery individuals from entering the country.

I am speaking, of course, about Burmese pythons. According to the documentary “Invasion of the Giant Pythons,” thousands of these pythons are brought into the country annually to sell to snake enthusiasts. A snake enthusiast is a person who enjoys keeping snakes as pets and is not required by law to take any medication for this condition.

America has tens of thousands of snake enthusiasts – and if you don’t believe me, just go to any hospital emergency room. You are likely to find a snake enthusiast there, saying to the doctor, “He seemed so friendly. I don’t know what got into him.”

As the documentary indicates, many snake enthusiasts in Florida have adopted Burmese pythons. Here’s what typically happens: A woman spots a baby python in a pet store and says, “Awwww … he looks so cute. Can we get him? We’ll call him Myron.” And her husband says, “Sure, why not? What could go wrong?”

About a year later, the woman is surprised to find that her cute little python now weighs 300 pounds and her husband has gone missing.

She puts ‘Missing’ posters all over the neighbourhood. “I miss my husband,” she tells her friends. “But at least I have Myron to curl up in bed with – and he doesn’t snore.”

When Myron grows to be over 25 feet long, the woman decides to let him go. “He’s a little too long for me,” she tells her friends. “I’ll be curled python up in bed with part of him and the other part of him will be in the living room, watching ‘Invasion

of the Great Pythons.’”

She takes him to the wetlands of Florida and releases him into the wild. There he runs into his long-lost uncles, aunts, nephews and cousins, several of them living in a discarded oil drum imprinted with the letters “BP,” which he knows stands for Burmese Pythons. Some of these pythons, like him, were released by pet owners, but most are escapees from animal warehouses damaged by hurricanes and the sets of bad Hollywood movies.

I know what you’re thinking: “What’s the harm in a bunch of pythons slithering around parts of Florida? After all, Florida is full of slithering creatures, not all of whom have dated Taylor Swift.”

Well, Shawn Heflick, a herpetologist featured in the documentary, would agree with you, at least partly. Burmese pythons “are not prone to attack humans unless molested or grabbed,” he says. That might put my mind at ease, but the documentary also showed a python swallowing an alligator whole. I don’t know about you, but any creature that can swallow an alligator whole scares the living (bleep) out of me. Given a choice between holding a Burmese python or spending a day with one of the Kardashians, I’d have a real dilemma on my hands.

The documentary showed in stark detail the variety of items on a Burmese python’s menu. A scientist cut open a python captured in Florida and found the remains of an alligator, two exotic birds, an adult deer and 438 missing votes from the 2000 presidential election.

Thankfully, Florida officials aren’t ignoring the problem. They’re giving permits to volunteers to hunt the pythons. They’re also organizing Pet Amnesty Days, allowing people to turn in pets they don’t want anymore, so other people can adopt them.

Anyone want to adopt a 25-foot Burmese python? It’s friendly, doesn’t snore and can swallow other creatures you don’t like: rats, alligators, raccoons – perhaps even a Kardashian or two.

Quotes and Sayings

You know you're getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while you're down there. – George Burns True friends are those who, when you make a fool of yourself, don't believe that this condition is permanent. - Erwin T. Randall That married couples can live together day after day is a miracle that the Vatican has overlooked. - Bill Cosby Marrying a man is like buying something you've been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn't always go with everything else in the house. - Jean Kerr America is the only country where a significant proportion of the population believes that professional wrestling is real but the moon landing was faked. - David Letterman The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us. - Bill Watterson

The Donation

Father Flanigan’s phone rang and he picked it up. The voice said, "Good morning, are you Father Flanigan?"

"I am" "This is the Revenue Service. Can you answer a question?"

"I can" "Do you know a Tom O’Halloran?"

"I do" "Does he belong to your church?"

"He does" "Did he donate $5,000 to your orphans’ fund?"

"He will."

Brain Cramps II

“I’ve never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body,” –Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward.

“We are ready for an unforeseen event that may or may not occur.”

–Al Gore, VP “Smoking kills. If you’re killed, you’ve lost a very important part of your life,” –Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for federal anti-smoking campaign.

“I want to help clean up the state that is so sorry today of journalism.

And I have a communications degree."

--Sarah Palin "This thaw -- took a while to thaw, it's going to take a while to unthaw." --George W. Bush “And now the sequence of events in no particular order.” - Dan Rather, television news anchor “If I sold all my liabilities, I wouldn't own anything. My wife's a liability, my kids are liabilities, and I haven't sold them.” - Ted Turner, media mogul, on selling off his money-losing properties

Hi, I’m butterfly

until he passed the spelling test. St. Peter told the old man to spell LOVE. The man replied, “L-O-V-E” and was welcomed into heaven. The very next day, St Peter asked the old man to conduct the spelling test for all newcomers while he ran an errand.

The old man was surprised when the first person to appear at the gate was his wife of 40 years. “Welcome to heaven, honey. It’s so good to see you. As soon as you pass the spelling test we can spend eternity together. Are you ready? I want you to spell Czechoslovakia.”

The Humour of Rodney Dangerfield

- I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap.

- Some dog I got too. We call him Egypt, because in every room he leaves a pyramid.

- My luck is so bad that if I bought a cemetery, people would stop dying.

- My wife is always trying to get rid of me. Last night she told me to put the garbage out. I told her I already did. She told me to go keep an eye on it.

Riddles for Kids

Q: Why did the picture go to jail?

A: Because it was framed.

Q: Did you hear about the race between the lettuce and the tomato?

A: The lettuce was a "head" and the tomato was trying to "ketchup"!

Q: Why did the belt get locked up?

A: He held up a pair of pants.

Q: What did baby corn say to mama corn?

A: "Where’s Popcorn?"

Q: Why couldn't the pirate play cards?

A: Because he was sitting on the deck!

Spelling Test

An old fella died and went to heaven but St. Peter told him he couldn’t enter

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