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Pool Chat Eating Out Salir A Comer News & Events Noticias y Eventos Rugby in Valencia El Rugby en Valencia Terra Mitica - Benidorm Denia Feature DĂŠnia: Un Paseo por las Rotas Puzzles & a Riddle - New Feature! Ways to Boost your Brain Power Maneras De Mejorar El Poder De Tu Cerebro


Editor’s Chat

Dear Readers, So, winter went out with a bang, blankets are lifting (cloud and bedding), and things are livening up as we begin the ascent to the summer.


This month Health and Fitness Chat brings you some healthy diet tips on how to increase your mental and physical energy (p. 20). To make use of some of your rekindled life force, Out & About Chat has a special feature for you on one of the best and liveliest theme parks in Spain: Terra Mitica at Benidorm (p. 6), recently re-opened for the 2010 season, and for those who miss a good game of rugger, there’s a real opportunity to join an up and coming team, based in Valencia capital (p. 12).


2010 Editor’s Chat News Terra Mitica Eating Out Chat Rugby Feature Out & About Chat Events Out & About Chat Pool Chat Brit Fun Health & Fitness Chat Brit Fun - Puzzles Pet Chat Golf Competition Chat Moto GP Classified Adverts Brit Fun

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The more sedate among us can enjoy a couple of serene and soul soothing strolls: at the sea coast near Denia, there’s a little known beauty spot with a fascinating history (p. 16) and near the charmingly quaint Gestalgar, there’s a lovely river-side walk through a lush and picturesque valley (p. 14). Eating Out Chat has a couple of new, “down to earth” places to take refreshments (p. 8 & 10), and for the more mentally energetic, there’s some new brain-storming puzzles in Brit Fun (p. 19 & 23). Yours faithfully, Chris Proctor Winners of “Find Don Quixote,” see page 27. Please keep your entries coming in! Queridos lectores, El invierno se esfumó de repente, las mantas y nubes se retiraron, y las cosas se empiezan a animar ahora que empezamos el camino ascendente hacia el verano. Este més nuestra sección “Health and Fitness Chat” os ofrece algunos consejos saludables en dietas y también como incrementar vuestra energía física y psíquica (p. 20). Para hacer uso de vuestra revivida fuerza vital, en “Out & About Chat” tenemos un reportaje especial de uno de los mejores y más animados parques de atracciones en España: Terra Mítica en Benidorm (p. 6), El parque ha abierto recientemente para la temporada 2010 y para aquellos de vosotros echando de menos un buen juego de Rugby, hay una oportunidad real de unirse a un prometedor equipo de este deporte ubicado en Valencia capital. (p. 12). Los más tranquilos de entre nosotros, pueden disfrutar de un par de paseos serenos y relajantes: En la costa cercana a Denia existe un no demasiado conocido bello paraje con una historia fascinante (p. 16) y cerca de la encantadora y pintoresca población de Gestalgar, un precioso paseo por la orilla del rio a través de un agreste y bonito valle (p. 14). En “Eating Out Chat” os mostramos un par de simpáticos locales para comer y tomar unas copas (p. 8 & 10),y para los mas energéticos mentalmente algunos crucigramas que pondrán vuestros cerebros a prueba en “Brit Fun” (p. 19 & 23). Saludos, Chris Proctor Ganadores de “Encuentra a Don Quixote,” mirad la pagina 27. ¡Por favor, Seguid participando!Por favor, seguid participando! BRITCHAT . 3

NEWS Fuel now 20% more than a year ago! If you noticed that you need to fill your tank more often, or that it seems to be costing you more than last year; you are correct; it’s not your imagination. After major complaints, which lead to a drop in fuel prices last year, prices have jumped sharply in 2010 with weekly increases for the entire month of March recorded on Diesel, and over the past weeks for Petrol.

New Michelin Tyres... Absolutely SCARY looking... Look for ‘em in August. These tyres are made in   Greenville,   South Carolina , USA .. SEE THROUGH TYRES - Radical new tyre design by Michelin. The next generation of tyres.  They had a pair at the Philadelphia car show. Yes, those are ‘spoke’ like connections to the inner part of the tyre from the outside tread ‘wrap!’ The next picture shows how odd it looks in motion... Makes you wonder how the ride feels doesn’t it?  These tyres are airless and are scheduled to be out on the market very soon. The bad news for law enforcement is that spike strips will not work on these. Just think of the impact on existing technology: A. no more air valves... B. no more air compressors at petrol stations... C. no more repair kits...  D. no more flats...  These are actual pictures South  Carolina plant of Michelin.





This Easter, filling a 50-litre tank of a diesel engine car will cost about 20% more than last year, about 53.60 € for the privilege, almost nine euros more than in the Easter holidays last year! It’s the same situation for gasoline. For a few weeks last year, for the first time ever n Spain, gasoline was actually cheaper than diesel! That didn’t last too long and today that 50-litre tank will cost around 59.20 €: about eleven euros more. According to data collected by the Ministry of Industry and Energy, expect to pay an average of 1.05 € for diesel and 1.16 € for gasoline, although by the time you read this, it’s probably risen further! And over in the UK, the AA has reported that Petrol was selling at 110p a litre on 4th January, but is now 111.25 GBP, while Diesel sells for just above 113p, a rise for Petrol of 25p and 14.5p for diesel over the last 12-months! The UK now has the twelfth highest unleaded price in Europe and the second highest diesel price.  With today’s exchange rate, Spain can’t be too far behind. According to, from what you pay at the pump, over 60% of that goes directly into the government’s pocket, so when you next complain about the profits that the oil industry are making, remember who really is raking in the euros and pounds and euros, no matter how much they might preach about going green!  If we all went green, from where would the government then find their tax revenue? That’s a quandary that they still have to answer to.   In the meantime, you’ll just have to dig deeper over Easter, if you’re traveling by car. Out & About Chat

NEWS Ryan Air’s new flights Budget airline Ryan Air has revealed that it  will be increasing both the flights and destinations served from Valencia. As from Monday 5th of April, there are two flights per week on Mondays and Thursdays - to Bournemouth, and the airline has inaugurated a regular flight between Valencia and Rygge airport near Oslo.  The airline also offers cheap flights from Valencia to Madrid and Malaga.

Valencia’s Giant Bid For 2018 World Cup Venue The Valencian Community has offered three giant stadiums as possible sites for the World Football Championship of 2018: the future Mestalla stadium of Valencia Football Club, the Jose Rico Perez Stadium in Alicante and the Martinez Valero stadium in Elche. Inspections of all these facilities are believed to have been already carried out in preparation for the May 14 presentation before the FIFA board  of a  Candidacy Book  for Spain and Portugal to host the 2018 championships.

TOURISM INVESTMENT The Conselleria for Tourism has revealed that it had spent over eight million Euros ensuring that Valencia’s beaches and their infrastructure were adequate for the influx of holiday-makers at this year’s Easter weekend. Belen Juste, the Consellera for Tourism, stated that beaches are one of the biggest attractions of the Valencian Community and it was essential that these be in top condition for the start of the 2010 season. News

Terra Mitica re-opens, but in limbo Benidorm Theme Park Terra Mitica opened on Wednesday 31 March for the Easter period, despite having a considerable question mark hanging over it as to the future owners. At the moment, the three main partners - the Valencian Government, along with the CAM and Bancaja - have still not yet made clear their intentions for the future of the park, despite having had offers from Aspro, Parques Reunidos and Aqualandia/Mundomar.  In a meeting with the unions yesterday, Park director Juan Jose de Torres stated that the Park was in a sort of limbo, but that this should not effect its performance over the Easter period.

See our feature on Page 6.

European Health Card (EHIC) There has been a lot of discussion recently about healthcare rights and some confusion about the European Health Insurance Card (EHIC), the little blue cards that used to be known as E111 forms. Here is a brief guide to EHIC entitlements which should answer some of your questions.  Of course, if you still have doubts about EHIC use, you can visit www., or contact your local Pension, Benefit and Healthcare Team based at the British Consulates in Alicante and Malaga. A few other things to remember about EHICs: -       Residency in this instance refers to your centre of interest.  This can be defined by where you spend most of your time, where you work or where you have your main ties. -       EHICs offer access to treatment on the same basis that health care is normally provided to nationals of that State. -       Most EHICs issued by the UK are sent to UK residents, and some of the letters that usually accompany a UK resident’s EHIC have been sent to UK citizens living abroad.  The letters have now been adapted, and all cards issued in the future to those living abroad should be catered towards an international audience.  -       If you are not eligible for a European Health Insurance Card, it is advisable to take out private health insurance when travelling abroad.


Terra Mitica Benidorm Michael Hayes shops as well as an outdoor adventure park. Plans for the 2009 season included the addition to shopping outlets adjacent to the Iberia section of the park. An additional hotel is under construction in the area just behind the Egypt section of the park. As has already been said the park is organised into five thematic zones: Egypt – This area is influenced by ancient Egyptian culture and artefacts. Greece – This area is influenced by ancient Greek culture and mythology. Rome – This area is influenced by ancient Roman culture and history. Iberia – This area is influenced by ancient Iberian culture and life. The Islands – This area is influenced by the ancient Mediterranean cultures and history. Rides In total, there are 25 rides at the park. The list of rides by complexity is given below: Without a doubt Benidorm is still the number 1 tourist destination in Europe, with visitors travelling from all European countries to enjoy the Sand, Sea, Sangria and Vicky Lyton or as she is more popular know “Sticky Vicky” one of the very few entertainers who has her act patented and registered worldwide, Vicky is one of the legends of the entertainment business known and watched by millions of people year in and year out. But what about those other entertainments also widely known such as the famous shows of Benidorm Palace which brings entertainment Las Vegas style to Benidorm, something no other show offers throughout Europe. Another, perhaps less known entertainment little know outside of Spain due to the low key publicity, is the fabulous Terra Mitica Theme Park, located less than a 5 minute drive from the centre of Benidorm. Terra Mitica is a theme park in the true sense and meaning of a theme park. Divided into 5 themed zones: Egypt, Greece, Rome, Iberia and the Islands of the Mediterranean, the park was opened in 2000. In 2004 – 2006 the park went through a bankruptcy process. In 2001, a year after the park opening, Paramount Parks entered into an agreement to manage Terra Mitica and the park was branded as a Paramount Park for the following season. In 2004 Paramount Park filed for the Spanish equivalent of bankruptcy protection from its creditors. Since then the park has been operating independently. Terra Mitica emerged from temporary receivership in 2006, after restructuring its expenses, reducing labour costs, and cancelling debt through the sale of excess park land. After generating, on average, a negative operating profit of 8 million euro per year from its inception, Terra Mitica produced positive EBITDA (Profit Before Tax) in 2006. For the 2008 season, Terra Mitica added a new free access areaincluding major branded food chains and



La Furia de Triton (Triton’s Fury). A themed big boat drop ride with two drops SynKope. A flat ride, 35 metres in height, reaching a speed of 90kn/h. Titanide. A Vekoma roller coaster. El Laberinto del Minotauro (The ladyrinth of the Minotaur). A dark ride. Los Icaros (The Icarus). Flying chairs. Templo de Kinetos (Kinetos Temple). A motion Simulator. Alucinakis. A childrens Magnus Colossus. Arriates. Ride on the backs of unicorns and pasting into a meadow of ancient Greece.


Arietes & Jabato. Childrens caroucel rides.

Out & About Chat


Cataratas del Nilo (The falls of the Nile). A log flume ride. It has two drops, one in reverse, with its biggest drop being 20 metres height. Akuatiti. Childrens version of “Cataratas del Nilo”. Magnus Colossus. A wooden roller coaster with a double drop. It’s 36 meters high and reaches a speed of 92 km/h. The roller coaster is 1,252 meters long. El Vuelo del Fenix (The flight of the Phoenix). A vertical drop tower with 60 meters and themed about the legend of the Phoenix. Inferno. It is 25 meters in height and flies at 60km/h producing 3g forces for a brief but exciting moment. It possesses one inversion. Ayquesustus. Replica child flight of the Phoenix. Rontundus. Ferris wheel for smaller baskets in the shape of doves. Serpentinum. Attraction of child carts pulled by geese and in which users, through a lever, can go up or down. Tentaculus. Attraction where children can upload, download and turn, transported in vehicles in the form of torches chaired by the Imperial Roman Eagle. Torbellinus. Childrens flying chairs. Vertigum. Childrens gondola mouse which rises and rotates in a circular motion.

The Islands.

La Colera de Akiles (The anger of Akiles). A “Supernova” 16 meters high. Los Rapidos de Argos. (Argos rapides) A water rapids ride. Mithos. Typical carousel with mythological beings, such as mermaids, centaurs, sacred oxen and others. El Rescate de Ulises (Ulysses Rescue). A dark wáter ride.

Out & About Chat

Apart from the rides, the park also offers 5 other attractions ranging from paintball game, haunted maze, boat rides and more than 13 childrens rides with lots of games and water zones, PLUS 16 shows to suit all ages and tastes.. Terra Mitica is open from March to December, has plenty of on site car parking with its own train station and bus link from Benidorm. Further information on the parks web site Within the area of Terra Mitica you have two golf courses designed by Jack Nicklaus and suitable for all levels of player. Located in a pine filled valley it covers an area of 6,612 meters in length and the two 18 hole courses have a par 72 and par 62 course. You can also visit next to the Terra Mitica and golf courses, Terra Natura, which is a new generation wildlife park where you can discover the “Zooinmersion” experience – a new concept in habitat design which will enable you to come into contact with the animals as if there were no barriers between you, at least, no visible ones. The 320,000 square meters of the Benidorm park are divided into four themed areas: Pangea, the entrance to the park, America, Asia and Europe. This park is a “real must visit” for animal lovers. If all that is not enough to handle, Terra Mitica, Terra Natura and golf then why not stop a night or two at one of the centrally located luxury hotels within the complex area, if you really want to indulge yourself in sheer luxury try the magnificent Asia Garden Hotel Resort, luxury at its very best.


Sinpy Jo´s Bar: Your international meeting point in Ruzafa Sinpy Jo´s Bar: Tu punto de encuentro internacional en Ruzafa By Cristina Garay

If you’re out and about in Valencia and fancy something different from your regular and boring “Bar Cafeteria” you should give Sinpy Jo´s a try. Located in the up coming neighborhood of Ruzafa, this bar is a “watering hole” with a difference. Jason and Mark Boyd, a pair of Scots brothers established in Valencia, have run since 2004 this friendly place, were all sort of people and nationalities rub shoulders every evening for a well poured pint of lager or cider. The name of the place is a pun taken from the Spanish slang language and means “without posh people” or in Spanish “Sin Pijos.” And for sure, you won’t be likely to rub shoulders with Posh and Becks in here, just a bunch of ordinary, friendly and carefree people having fun and sipping drinks at very reasonable prices. In Sinpy Jo´s a pint of Mahou will cost you 3.00 € and a half pint only 1.60 € Mahou “tercios” only 1.80. If you fancy a Gin and Tonic or other cocktails made with your favorite tipple, these are priced only at 5.00 €, a very sensible price for a major city center like Valencia. Also, from Monday to Thursday they have a happy hour from 18.00 h to 20.00 h, when you can have a 2 x 1 in Mahou on tap and bottled San Miguel 1516. If you miss your cider, Sinpy Jo´s have Gaymers Original on tap. You have the choice as well of Grimberger beer also on tap. There is a Quiz in English every Wednesday at 22.30 giving you the opportunity to dust off your general knowledge and, being lucky, win the Jackpot (every one participating in the quiz pays 1 € and the winner takes all!!. The crowd at Sinpy Jo´s varies from young to middle aged, but every one will be welcomed equally by the Boyd brothers. Don´t be surprised if you see one or more of the “four legged category” (I´m not talking about drunken customers), this is also a very dogfriendly Place. Also, Sinpy Jo´s offers you the perfect opportunity to improve your spanish or english. Frequented by English and Spanish people alike, most of the clientele BRITCHAT . 8

Eating Out Chat

Sinpy Jo´s Bar Sinpy Jo´s Bar

By Cristina Garay is bilingual, as are the owners. Remember, if you visit Ruzafa and want to experience a unique place in Valencia, don´t forget to pay a visit to Sinpy Jo´s.

Simpy Jo´s C/ Cadiz 43 Ruzafa, Valencia (Very close to Mercado de Ruzafa and public parking) (Muy cerca del Mercado de Ruzafa y parking público) Si sales por Valencia y te apetece probar algo diferente del típico pub o bar-cafetería, tienes que visitar Simpy Jo´s. Ubicado en el emergente barrio de Ruzafa, éste es un sitio diferente. Jason y Mark Boyd, dos hermanos Escoceses afincados en Valencia llevan desde 2004 este amigable pub donde gente de todo tipo y de diferentes nacionalidades se junta todas las noches para disfrutar de una “pinta” de cerveza bien tirada o de la sidra de barril. El nombre de este sitio es un juego de palabras tomado del “slang” español Sin Pijos, vamos sin pijos y seguro que no veréis a Victoria o a Becks por allí, solamente encontraréis a un puñado de gente amigable y despreocupada, pasándolo bien y degustando bebidas a unos precios muy razonables. En Simpy Jo´s una pinta de Mahou os costará 3.00 € y media pinta sólo 1.60 €. Los tercios de Mahou sólo cuestan 1.80 €. Si te apetece un Gin & tonic o tu cocktail favorito te costará sólo 5 €, un precio muy razonable para una ciudad como Valencia. Además de Lunes a Jueves tienen una “Happy Hour” desde las 18.00 h. hasta las 20.00 h. durante la que puedes disfrutar de la oferta 2x1 en Mahou de Barril y en los tercios de San Miguel 1516. Si añoráis la Sidra inglesa, en Simpy Jo´s tienen Gaymers Original de barril. También tenéis la opción de cerveza Grimberger, también de presión. Todos los Miércoles a las 22.30 h. organizan un Quiz (juego de preguntas y respuestas) en Inglés. Es una buena oportunidad para “desempolvar vuestra “cultura general” y, si sois afortunados, ganar el “bote” (cada participante paga 1 euro y el que gana se lo lleva todo). La clientela de Simpy Jo´s varía desde los jóvenes hasta los de mediana edad, pero todos serán igualmente bienvenidos por los hermanos Boyd. No os sorprendáis si veis a algunos pertenecientes a la categoría de “las cuatro patas”( No, no estoy hablando de clientes borrachos), en este pub los perros son bien recibidos. Para terminar, deciros que Simpy Jo´s os ofrece la opotunidad perfecta para mejorar vuestro Español o Inglés, la mayoría de la gente que frecuenta este bar son bilingües y los propietarios también lo son. No lo olvidéis,si vais a Ruzafa y queréis conocer un espacio diferente, pasaros a tomar algo en Simpy Jo´s.

Eating Out Chat



he NEW Café Bar Chaparral! l NUEVO Café Bar Chaparral




any of you may remember the “OLD” Bar Chaparral on Urb. Monte Tesoro. Well, if you venture down there now, there’s a pleasant surprise in store for you. You’ll find a brand new bar, literally a stones throw from the old one, that’s opened just in time for the Spring and Summer season.


riendly Spanish owner Juan has converted a nearby chalet into his new bar, and in stark contrast with his tired and dingey old place, you’ll now find a bright, neat and stylishly decorated “NEW” bar, with a lovely, glazed-in verandah and a large outdoor terrace area for the sulrtry summer evenings.


broad menu offers typical Spanish fair for Almuerzos and lunches: salads, tapas, tortillas and bocadillos to platos combinados with meat, fish and poultry and the obligatory Sunday Paella. But if you just fancy a light snack, you can choose from a good selection of toasted sandwiches and hamburgers, and there’s always patatas fritas.


or the Brits, Juan always obliged and you can make up your own meal from a combination of any things from the menu: the ham, egg, chips and beans was always a popular puller in the old bar.


he new bar Chaparral is absolutely pristine, but everything else is essentially what Bar Chapparal always was: a good old, down to earth, Valencian country café bar, where you can mingle with affable locals, enjoy a simple café con leche or cortado, a cerveza or two and a plain snack or meal, and perhaps coincide there with friends, or even meet someone new.


ew Bar Chaparral is located in Urb. Monte Tesoro, between Torrent, Turis and Montserrat. Follow signs to Urb. Monte Tesoro, on the way to Urb. Masia Pavia. The bar is in front of the new residential development of terraced villas, 50 yarrds on the left from the road entrance and 50 yards before the old bar.

Café Bar Chaparral Urb. Monte Tesoro Near Montserrat Venta Cabrera to Turis road towards Urb.Masia Pavia 96-212-6260


Eating Out Chat


he NEW Café Bar Chaparral!


l NUEVO Café Bar Chaparral EL EDITOR

Muchos de vosotros seguramente recordaréis el “ANTIGUO” Bar Chaparral en la Urbanización Monte Tesoro. Bueno, si ahora os aventuráis en ella, os llevaréis una grata sorpresa. Encontraréis un nuevo bar, a tan sólo un tiro de piedra, literalmente, de donde se encontraba el antiguo, que ha abierto justo a tiempo para la temporada de primavera y verano. Juan, el simpático dueño Español ha transformado un chalet de las cercanías en su nuevo bar y en contraste con su viejo y destartalado viejo local, os encontraréis un luminoso, limpio y decorado con estilo “NUEVO” bar, con su porche acristalada y una gran terraza exterior perfecta para las bochornosas tardes de verano. El amplio menú ofrece comida típica Española para los almuerzos y comidas: Ensaladas, tapas, tortillas, bocadillos y platos combinados a base carne,pescado y pollo y también la obligatoria Paella de los domingos. Si os apetece algo ligero, podéis elegir de una amplia selección de sandwiches tostados, hamburguesas y las siempre presentes patatas fritas. Con los Británicos, Juan es condescendiente y permite la posibilidad de confeccionar vuestro plato con una combinación de cualquier cosa de la carta. El jamón con huevo, patatas y alubias en salsa de tomate es y será uno de los favoritos atractivos de este bar. El nuevo Chaparral es completamente prístino, pero todo es esencialmente como ha sido siempre en El Chaparral: Un ambiente de sencillo y campestre café bar Valenciano, donde los extranjeros podemos

Eating Out Chat

mezclarnos con los amables habitantes del pueblo, disfrutar de un simple café con leche, un cortado, una cerveza o dos y un sencillo aperitivo o comida y quizás, coincidir con amigos o incluso conocer a alguien nuevo. Nuevo Bar Chaparral está ubicado en La Urbanización Monte Tesoro, a medio camino entre Torrente, Turís y Montserrat. Para llegar allí, sigue las indicaciones para Urbanización Monte Tesoro, en dirección a Masía Pavía. El bar está enfrente de la nueva zona residencial de adosados, a unos 45 metros a la izquierda de la carretera de acceso y 45 metros aproximadamente antes del viejo bar.



Ciencias Rugby Club is based in Valencia city, where we train twice a week in the river bed in front of the school of languages. The club was formed in 1995 and has gone from strength to strength becoming one of the strongest teams in its division. The team is mainly made up of Spanish players from the Valencia area, but we also have a couple of Argentinian, French and British players. I think the best thing about the team is that we don’t take it too seriously but we have beaten some of the best teams in the region. Our cultural influences compliment our playing style and each player brings something unique to the team. This season we haven’t been playing to our best mainly due to injury. We had lost all our games before Christmas and things were looking bad. The team struggled on and did its best not to lose morale. After a lot of consideration, a new strategy was formed and we began training with a serious goal ahead of us. We didn’t want to drop down to a lower league and we were tired of losing. Our first win came against Tavernes in February, it was a difficult game, but we pulled through in the end. Our second win was against the Les Abelles B team, it seemed our strategy was working. We have now won five games in a row and we have one game left on the 18th of April. We have to win the last game to ensure we are not relegated. If we continue playing like we have been, I don’t think we will have a problem winning our last game. Ciencias is a very welcoming and friendly team, they are also well known for their love of partying. The team has a clubhouse in “El Carmen” where you can often find the lads preparing some sort of celebration or dinner. We are always looking for new players and are currently trying to establish a youth squad. If you are looking to play rugby, or just enjoy the social side, Ciencias is the team for you. If you are interested in joining us please come along to training or contact us via the “foro rugbero” on the Ciencias webpage- We look forward to seeing you!

de la zona de Valencia, pero también tenemos unos cuantos jugadores, argentinos, franceses e ingleses. Una de las mejores cosas de este club, es que no nos lo tomamos demasiado en serio, pero aun así hemos vencido a algunos de los mejores equipos de la región. Nuestras diferencias culturales mejoran nuestra manera de jugar, ya que cada jugador aporta algo único a nuestro equipo. Esta temporada no hemos jugado a nuestro mejor nivel, principalmente por las lesiones de nuestros jugadores. Antes de navidades habíamos perdido todos los partidos y el panorama nos parecía sombrío. El equipo se esforzó y siguió luchando lo mejor que pudo para conservar la moral. Después de mucho pensar, adoptamos una nueva estrategia, empezamos a entrenar y nos pusimos el serio objetivo de mejorar como meta. No queríamos bajar de división y estábamos cansados de perder. Nuestra primera victoria fue contra el Tavernes, en Febrero. Fue un partido duro, pero al final lo conseguimos. Nuestro segundo triunfo fue contra el equipo Les Abelles B. Parecía que nuestra estrategia estaba funcionando. Ahora llevamos ganados cinco partidos seguidos y nos queda otro el día 18 de Abril. Tenemos que ganarlo para asegurarnos de no ser relegados. Si continuamos jugando como lo hemos venido haciendo, no creo que tengamos ningún problema para ganar nuestro último partido. Ciencias es un equipo muy amigable y abierto y es conocido también por su afición a salir de fiesta. El equipo tiene una sede el Barrio del Carmen de Valencia, donde muy a menudo se les puede encontrar preparando alguna fiesta o cena. Siempre estamos buscando nuevos jugadores y en la actualidad estamos tratando de formar un equipo juvenil. Si te gusta jugar al rugby o tan solo disfrutar socializandote con amigos, Ciencias es tu equipo. Si estás interesado en unirte a nosotros, por favor ven a entrenar o contactamos en el “foro rugbero” en la pagina web de Ciencias www.cienciasrugby. com. ¡Esperamos veros pronto!

¿TE GUSTA EL RUGBY, CONOCER GENTE Y SALIR DE FIESTA?, UNETE AL CLUB DE RUGBY CIENCIAS El Club de Rugby Ciencias tiene su sede en Valencia donde entrenamos dos veces a la semana en el viejo cauce del Turia, frente a la Escuela de Idiomas. El club se formó en 1995 y ha ido fortaleciéndose cada vez más hasta convertirse en uno de los clubes mas fuertes de su división. Nuestro equipo esta formado principalmente por españoles

I visited the offices of the RSPCA today. It's tiny: you couldn't swing a cat in there. I was stealing things in the supermarket today while balanced on the shoulders of a couple of vampires. I was charged with shoplifting on two counts. I bought a train ticket to France and the ticket seller said 'Eurostar?' I said 'Well I've been on telly, but I'm no Dean Martin. I went to the local video shop and I said, ‘Can I borrow Batman Forever?’ He said, ‘No, you’ll have to bring it back tomorrow’ BRITCHAT . 12

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- Stress - Tiredness, lack of energy - Pinched nerves - Migraines, headaches - Stiffness in the neck - Whiplash, neck trauma - Vertigos, dizziness - Tension, shoulder pains - Thoracic or lumbar pain - Chest pain, Asthma - Bad posture - Stomach acidity - Sciatica, pain down the leg - Joint pain, knee pain - Pins and needles, numbness arms or hands - Pins and needles or numbness down the leg If you have experienced one or more of these symptoms, chiropractic could be the solution. Call now for a free check, it could be the start of a new life!



Rio Turia Continued Rio Turia Continua John R. Knight

This is a continuation of our trips down the Rio Turia that we featured last year. we found this quite by accident, as it was on the way to a “Geocache”, which is our hobby described in some of our previous issues. If you go into the village of Gestalgar and head for the riverside car park, you can park up easily. There are signs on this side of the river to the Fountain, but this is the way you will be coming back. So, cross the river to the far side and turn right to go up river. It is a very pleasant walk along an unmade road along to the fountain. After viewing the fountain, if you are more adventurous and happy for a climb, then you can see a track to the left of the fountain which will take you high up for some spectacular views. Otherwise, cross the river and admire the rushing water. Turn right back down the river paths that go back to the car park. Every now and again there are signs in Spanish and English about different features along the walk back, which make this section more interesting. This is an easy walk, part of which can perhaps also be done with a wheelchair. It is certainly a very beautiful area and worth a trip out to see. In total I would estimate that it’s about 2 km to the fountain and back and makes for a nice afternoon out. BRITCHAT . 14



You get a FREE EVENTS listing with BRITCHAT, space permitting, but in Guide2Valencia we will give you unlimited text and a photo. For more information email:


Olocou rastro last Sunday of each month Supporting worthwhile charities. Stalls to include Carolyns cards, Homemade pickles and Jams, English food, Gold bought and sold, Book stalls and general bric a brac. We also have a cafe selling cakes and english bacon and sausage sandwiches and also full breakfasts

Contact details remain the same Carolyn 962555819 or 6664809608

Directions: Follow signs to OLOCAU from LLIRIA, Turn right towards BETERA at the main CV333 Roundabout, (CV333 Near Valencia). URB. LA LLOMA is on the next roundabout, RASTRO will be signposted from there.

New Activity called WAY TAN YONG

No matter what your age or physical condition, this new activity will improve your health, energy and wellbeing. It’s called WAY TAN YONG and in essence it is working with energy through gentle easy movements. This new group intends to start in the Chiva/Godelleta area this Autumn, so if you are interested please contact Mila on

Linguistic Exchange

Would you like to improve your Spanish by practicing with a local person in an informal setting? Would you like to help them to improve their English? If your answer is yes, welcome to Central Point Language Exchange. We meet every  Wednesday 19 to 20.30 hs in Torrent (Bar La Red Rose – CC. Las Americas). Cost 10€ a month or 3€ a session - Interested? Please contact Marcela Mattenet

IWC- International Womens Club

Valencia Monthly Coffee meetings every 1st Thursday of the month, from 10 till 12 hs. Anybody Welcome!!! - Come and join us at the Top restaurant  – 4th Floor - HIPERCOR - C.Comercial Ademuz, Av. Pio XII, 51 ,Valencia, End off Ademuz - Lliria motorway. Near Nuevo Centro and La Fe Hospital -Near Tube station Campanar FREE Underground car park. If you are interested in joining please, log on our site


or mail

Montroy Table Top Sale

Sunday Pub Quiz with Neil and Craig

My husband and I along with the people of the town hall in Montroy organize a car boot sale every month.  It is always held at Calle La Pau, Montroy Contact Cindy at 960 802 513  or 695 100 540 2010 Dates: Jan 3, Feb 7, Mar 14, April 4, May 2 June 6, July 4, Aug 1, Sep 5, Oct 3, Nov 7, Dec 5 Always  from 10 - 2. Contact person:

Cindy 960 802 513 or 695 100 540

Balcon de Montroy Rastro

Just to let you know the Balcon rastro has finished for a few months. We will try again maybe in September

Info: 96-255-5819 (Carolyn) PEDRALBA RASTRO / TABLE TOP SALE

SABADO 1 MAYO / SATURDAY 1st MAY desde las 9.30 hasta 14horas BAR de los JUBILADOS, PEDRALBA Regalos Dia de MADRE / MOTHERS DAY Gifts Conservas, marmalades / Jams & Pickles Manualedades / Handicrafts Pasteles, Bom Bomes / Cakes & Chocolates Tarjetas de Felicitación / Handmade Greetings Cards Bisutería / Jewellery Cosmética Natural / Natural Cosmetics Segundo Mano / Second Hand Thermomix demo. Tómbola y mucho mas……. Refrescos en el bar /Refreshments in Bar ¿Participar con Nosotros?/ Why not Participate with us

Questions in English - with a local flavour Brainboxes or boobies of all nationalities welcome. 7 pm Sundays - At Sally O’Brien Pub. Avenida Aragon, Valencia (beside petrol station)


Sunday, 18th April - Domingo Abril 18th 10.30-13.30 horas - Stands are Free MAS PAVIA RESTAURANTE MASIA PAVIA URBA, Nr Monserrat

Call Amanda to book your stand 625 819 734 or ...

Tables are not supplied. Stall holders arrive from 9.30am Future car boots 3rd Sunday of the month

Contact: tel 606517656 EVENTS


Denia - Las Rotas and the wreck of La Guadalupe By C. Garay

At the northern coastline of Denia, next to the San Antonio Cape, we find “Las Rotas,” a seemingly never ending succession of small rocky coves, full of exotic and rugged beauty. Walking down from La Marineta Casiana beach, we take a casual stroll passing the quaint old buildings, silent witnesses of a lost grandeur. We can visit the old English cemetery, were the rich raisin traders and the unlucky seafarers, who lost their lives to the sea, rest in peace. This is how the story goes:

impossible angle over the cliffs. The locals hang out the octopus to dry in the salty air and they swear that it is a delicacy, grilled with some olive oil and a few cloves of garlic. We stop for refreshments in “Helios,” a bar that seems as old and full of life as the sea itself... Take note, remember this story, and if you are in Denia, don’t miss this scenic and fascinating walk.

On March 16th of 1799 the frigate La Guadalupe sank off the coast of Denia. The ship was trying to get away from two English warships, the Centaur and the Cormorant. Looking for a place to wait for the storm to calm, the ship hit the rocky coast and sank. The people from Denia tried so hard to reach the ship, but only a Spaniard sailor and ex-convict Andres Martinez enrolled in The Guadalupe, having saved himself, swam back to the shipwreck with a rope tied to his body. He was able to rescue 180 of the men, but unfortunately the other 107 sailors died and another 40 disappeared. That day the village built a cemetery on the coast to bury the bodies. Believing they were of English origin, the locals named the place “El Cementeri dels Anglesos” or “El Cementerio de los Ingleses.” Nowadays, not a single body remains in this place, except that of a child, the son of an English gentleman and who could not be buried in the Denia cemetery because he was not catholic. Well, this is a bit of an eery tale...but today this is an exceptionally beautiful place, full of great pine trees and in the air we can feel a sense of heavenly peace. Slowly, taking our time, we walk along the coastline admiring the white fishermen’s houses which hang in an



Dénia: Un Paseo por las Rotas y el naufragio de La Guadalupe By C. Garay

En el norte de la costa de Dénia, junto al cabo de San Antonio se encuentra Las Rotas, una sucesión interminable de rocosas y pequeñas calas, llenas de exótica y agreste belleza. Caminando desde la playa de la Marineta Casiana nos tomamos nuestro tiempo paseando perezosamente ante las casas antiguas e imponentes, testigos silentes de una grandeza ya pasada. Nos asomamos al viejo Cementerio de los Ingleses, donde los ricos exportadores de pasas y los desafortunados marineros que perdieron sus vidas en el mar, descansaron un día en paz. Así es como todo pasó: El 16 de Marzo de 1799 La Guadalupe, una fragata de guerra Española huía de los barcos ingleses. Al parecer, cuando quiso acercarse a la costa para guarecerse y debido al fuerte temporal, la fragata embarrancó y tras varias horas intentando sacarla a flote, se hundió. Los vecinos de Dénia acudieron al rescate de los supervivientes, 180 tripulantes y oficiales que lograron salvarse al poder tirarles un cabo un preso, Andrés Martínez. En el naufragio perdieron la vida 107 tripulantes y se contabilizaron 40 desaparecidos. Hoy en día no quedan cuerpos enterrados en el cementerio. Sólo el de un niño, hijo de un rico comerciante inglés del siglo XIX que no pudo ser enterrado en el cementerio de Dénia, por ser protestante. Bueno, la historia es un poco triste, pero hoy el lugar está lleno de gigantescos pinos y se respira un aire de paz. Despacio, tomándonos nuestro tiempo, seguimos caminado por la orilla del mar, mientras admiramos las blancas casas de pescadores que cuelgan en un ángulo imposible sobre los acantilados. Hay pulpos secándose al sol y se dice en Dénia que son deliciosos hechos a la plancha con un poco de ajo. Paramos a tomar algo en Helios, un bar que parece tan viejo y lleno de vida como el mismo mar... Tomad nota, si vais a Dénia, recordad esta historia y no os perdáis este pintoresco paseo.



Swimming Pool Operation & Maintenance

Kindly provided by Peek at Spain SL Normal Filtration

This should be from the SkimmerAND the bottom, as it will clean more of the water. The valves are usually those with the red handles and when the handle is ACROSS the pipe that is closed, as it’s across the flow - When it’s pointing with the pipe the valve is open. When vacuuming, all other valves should be CLOSED, to give maximum suction to the vacuum. Empty the filter basket afterwards. Once a week (or sooner if required) empty the skimmer basket and the motor filter. With the motor filter, turn all the valves, including the multiport valve to CLOSED! The basket can then be removed without flooding! Make sure the lid is tightened after replacing a clean basket or you will get leaks! For normal operation, reopen all the following valves: • Pool Bottom • Skimmer • Multiport Valve to “Filtration”

The Multiport Valve

The Multiport Valve is multifunctional and the 6 photographs show the translations for each position.

The pressure Gauge

The pressure gauge will normally work at 1 kg/sq cm. When it creeps up to 1.5 kg/sq cm and the jets are not working as efficiently as they were, this means that the “muck” has been collected by the sand in the filter unit and is blocking the flow, so it is now in need of being discarded.

Cleaning the Filter Sand

The sand is what actually fine cleans the water in your pool and is contained in a large tank. This allows the water to be finely sifted whilst the pump is on. Once the pressure rises, it’s not doing its job as efficiently. By reversing the flow, the dirt can be ejected down the drain or onto the land. This is called “Backwashing” – It then needs to be followed by a “Rinse”.


By using the Multiport Valve on “Back wash” for TWO minutes, or, if you have a small glass tube above the multiport valve, then you can see the water getting cleaner. When it’s clean then change to “RINSE” for 30 seconds, you will return the sand in the canister to a “clean” status and the pool will once more work efficiently. Important: Turn the motor off before moving positions on the multiport valve or you will damage it.

Pool goes green?

If ever you get Algae in the pool (turns green), it is likely that you are not putting enough tablets in the skimmer each week and you should increase the dose by one. You should then buy “Astral Tricloro Granules” – They come in 1 KG containers. These should be sprinkled in the pool as per the instructions.

Pool Chemicals Normal Cleaning

This is what you should look for: Depending on the size of your pool, put 2 or three tablets in the skimmer basket per week in the summer. In winter this will reduce, as they do not dissolve so quickly and the pool still remains clear. We do not recommend the floating baskets as there is no water movement over the tablets. Placing the tablets in the skimmer basket ensures that water is moving over the tablets whilst the filter is on. The filter should be on a couple of hours a day. I prefer an hour in the morning just before the pool is likely to be used and another hour at midday when nobody is likely to be using it, as they are at lunch or siesta. This should keep your pool beautifully clear and clean! Alter the times to suit. In fact, since this was originally written the pool man left it at 1.5 hours in the morning and 1.5 hours in the afternoon and I left it on that setting. It worked fine for 3 years on my setting though! If you want to reduce pool cleaning to 5 minutes per week, then you should spend about 1,700 € to get a “Polaris” cleaner. This is what we use and we can go away and leave the pool for three weeks and it keeps the pool spotlessly clean!


The Riddle of The Gold Bars In the far off days when camel trains used to ply the trade routes of Arabia, Persia and points East, a wealthy Baghdad merchant would load his camels once a year with sacks of gold and take them to Samarkand to trade for spices and silks. One year, there were 10 camels in the caravan, each with 10 bars of gold. Each driver and each animal carrying a sack containing 10 bars of gold. Each bar weighed 10 lb, so each camel was loaded with 100 lb of gold when the caravan set out. But not when they reached journey’s end! For, a dishonest driver had found a way of shaving exactly 1 lb off every bar in his sack in a way that was not visible. The thief was 10 lb of gold richer and his load 10 lb lighter.

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The merchant suspected he was being cheated but could not think of how to catch the thief. In desperation, he went to a wise man who told him to prepare a large balance and weights. “Then”, said the wise man, “I will show you how to catch the thief in a single weighing.” What did the wise man tell the merchant? the answer on page 27.


A question for all you smokers? Cigarette smoke is the residue of your pleasure. It permeates the Air, My Hair, My Clothes, not to mention MY LUNGS. This all takes place WITHOUT MY CONSENT! I have a Pleasure! I like alcohol now and again. The residue from my pleasure is urine: So, would you mind if I stood on a chair, and pee’d all over you without your consent. BRIT FUN


EIGHT WAYS TO BOOST YOUR BRAIN POWER Never skip breakfast. Eat slow-releasing carbohydrates such as porridge or muesli to keep energy levels stable. Add fruit and a glass of juice and you’ve already eaten two of the recommended five-a-day fruit and vegetables.

glasses of fluid a day. Water is the healthiest choice, but other healthy drinks such as fruit juice and milk also count towards your daily fluid intake.

Eat regularly – every three to four hours. If possible, have a piece of fresh fruit mid-morning to help maintain your energy levels until lunch. Make sure you eat enough irons (found in lean red meat, egg yolks, pulses, dried apricots and fortified breakfast cereals). Low levels can effect your concentration levels and make you feel tired and lethargic. Eat oily fish such as salmon, sardines and fresh tuna at least once a week. They contain omega – 3 fats, which help the brain cells communicate with each other. Eat your greens. (In a study carried out by the University of Sydney, men and women who consumed the most vitamin C performed best in tests for recall, memory and attention span. Don’t eat too late. A heavy meal late at night can interfere with sleep, so try to eat your evening meal at least three hours before going to bed. Eat lightly. Business lunches are a danger zone. If you choose the wrong thing this can make you feel tired and lethargic during the afternoon. If you need to stay alert in the afternoon choose a protein based lunch such as a salad with fish or chicken and avoid alcohol. Make sure you drink enough water. If your brain doesn’t get enough fluid, you’ll become lethargic and will be more likely to develop a headache. Aim for six to eight

Nunca te saltes el desayuno. Come carbohidratos de lenta absorción como puré de avena (porridge) o muesli para mantener tus niveles de energía estables. Añade frutas y un vaso de zumo y así ya habrás ingerido dos porciones de las cinco raciones diarias recomendadas de frutas y verduras. Come regularmente, cada tres o cuatro horas. Si es posible come una pieza de fruta a media mañana para ayudar a mantener tus niveles de energía hasta el almuerzo. Asegúrate de que ingieres suficiente hierro (éste se encuentra en la carne roja magra, yemas de huevo, legumbres, albaricoques desecados y cereales de desayuno fortificados) Niveles bajos de este mineral pueden afectar a tu capacidad de concentración y hacer que te sientas cansado y letárgico.



OCHO MANERAS DE MEJORAR EL PODER DE TU CEREBRO Consume pescados como salmón, sardinas y atún fresco por lo menos una vez a la semana, contienen grasas omega 3, que ayudan a mejorar las conexiones sinápticas de las neuronas. Aliméntate con verduras (en un estudio realizado por la Universidad de Sydney, los hombres y mujeres que consumieron más vitamina C lograron mejores resultados en los test de memoria y capacidad de atención). No comas demasiado tarde. Una ingesta copiosa por la noche puede interferir con tu sueño, Así que intenta cenar al menos tres horas antes de irte a dormir. Come ligero. Los almuerzos de negocios son un terreno peligroso. Si eliges una opción inadecuada, puedes sentirte cansado y letárgico después. Si quieres mantenerte alerta y despierto, elige un almuerzo basado en proteínas como pescado o pollo acompañado de ensalada. Evita el alcohol. Asegúrate de que bebes suficiente agua. Si tu cerebro no recibe el fluido suficiente, te sentirás adormilado y serás más propenso a los dolores de cabeza. Intenta beber de seis a ocho vasos de agua u otro líquido al día. El agua es la opción más saludable, pero otras bebidas como el zumo de frutas o la leche cuentan también en tu cupo de líquidos diarios.



Interview with Dr. Alapont By Cristina Garay We are pleased to inform you there is now a private, English speaking, psychiatric practice in Valencia at the above address for the treatment of mental illness. We have interviewed Dr. Alapont to find out more. Can you explain to us what services you offer and what your qualifications are? I understand there is a need for a UK trained and English speaking psychiatrist here because of the amount of British population in the Costa Blanca area and Valencia. It is very difficult to explain to a doctor who does not speak your language what is wrong, even more to explain our feelings and emotions. I am British trained and practiced psychiatry successfully in England, mainly Birmingham for 16 years from 1988 until 2004. I am a Consultant Psychiatrist and on the Specialist Registration of the General Medical Council and the Royal College of Psychiatrists of England. I have links with the Psychiatric Department in the University of Birmingham and with the Research Center in Ageing in the UK. Where else do you work? I also work in the private hospital Quir贸n and in the Universidad Cat贸lica. What illnesses do you treat? I will be focusing my work on the prevention and treatment of Affective Disorders (Depression), Anxiety Disorders, Stress, Insomnia, Obsessive Compulsive Disorders, Premenstrual Syndrome, Postpartum Depression and Addictions to Hipnotics or Sedatives (Benzodiazepines). I will also be running a Memory Clinic for memory problems and the prevention and treatment of Alzheimer麓s Disease and other Dementias. Domiciliary visits and visits to Nursing or Residential Homes may be possible after prior consultation with the family.

DR. EDUARDO ALAPONT PEREZ Gran V铆a Marques del Turia, 69-3 Consultant Psychiatrist Mobile 638703246 BRITCHAT . 22


Britchat’s Mind Blowing Puzzles Answers on Page 26

A man stopped his car opposite a hotel and immediately knew that he was bankrupt. HOW? If it rained for forty days and forty nights, and the animals entered in pairs at a rate of thirty pairs per day, how many days did it take moses to get all three hundred and sixty animals onto the ark?

DID YOU KNOW.... In 1752, Great Britain reformed its calender. It had previously operated under the Julian Calender, but during 1752 adopted the Gregorian Calender. The calendar change required omitting eleven days; 2 September was followed by 14 September. Furthermore, 1 January became the official beginning of the New Year, instead of 25 March. The former date had been commonly regarded as the beginning of the New Year for a long time, but the latter was retained in formal usage. To ensure consistency of financial record keeping, and to prevent annual payments falling due before they would have under the Julian Calendar, the fiscal year was not shortened, with the result that in the United Kingdom each tax year has since begun on 6 April. The English word calendar is derived from the Latin word kalendae, which was the Latin name of the first day of every month.

One morning a petrol attendant ran into the office the moment his boss arrived and told him that the previous evening he had dreamt that one of the pumps had been leaking, causing a huge explosion. His boss was sceptical, but when he checked the pump in question, he indeed found a potentailly disasterous leak. He switched the pump off and then sacked the attendant. WHY? Dave ran halfway into the forest in a half hour. Steve claimed that he had gone two-thirds of the way into the forest in the same time. Dave said that this was impossible. WHY?



Is your pet ready to travel if you have to suddenly return to the UK? Feature provided by P.E.P.A.


los animales

Protección y educación para

Your vet in Spain will prepare your pet for entry to the UK under the Pet Travel Scheme (PETS) and will issue you all the necessary documentation. In brief, the requirements are that your pet is: • Micro-chipped by a qualified vet • Vaccinated against rabies • Blood tested to ensure that the vaccination has provided the necessary protection against rabies • Treated against parasites NB: A period of six months must pass between receiving a satisfactory blood test result and your pet entering the UK. Ensuring that an animal is ready for entry into the U.K. would save so much distress for owners, their pet and the volunteers who work in animal charities. Full information on the Pet Travel Scheme is given on www.

It takes at least 6 months to prepare your pet for entry to the UK without quarantine. Animal charities throughout the region are receiving more and more calls from British ex-pats who find themselves in the heartaching position of having to leave their pets behind in Spain or having them destroyed when, for a variety of reasons, they must return unexpectedly to the U.K. It takes at least 6 months to prepare your pet dog or cat for entry in the U.K. It is not overly expensive and in so many situations would avoid the distress of leaving a much loved pet behind in Spain. The standard “European Passport” which is issued after the dog or cat is micro-chipped and vaccinated against rabies is not sufficient for entry into the U.K. The animal must be prepared under the U.K. Government Pet Travel Scheme (PETS). If it isn’t it will have to be put into quarantine in the U.K. which is a more expensive option.


Benji, in the photo above, is a gentle natured 3 year old castrated Podenco whose owner is returning to the U.K. shortly. He’s very loving towards people and has been reared in a family environment with children. Can you give him a home? For more information about Benji and all our ther animals please telephone P.E.P.A on





Campaigning for pet sterilization. Please give us a hand and contact us on:

96 298 60 47


Please Support our advertisers & Mention ................... Por favor nunca te olvides de mencionar a .............................. cuando respondas a algún anuncio. PET CHAT


Results for the Stableford competition held at El Bosque Golf Club in Chiva on Monday 1st March 2010.     This month saw typical cooler temperatures early on followed by bright and warmer conditions later on, although the strong winds resulted in some of the lowest scoring we have had on a competition day. This month´s winner was Mick Newman (H/Cap 24) who won on countback with 27 points. RunnerUp was 2009 Player of the Year Chris Ward (H/Cap 24) also with 27 points. Our thanks go to Mike from who kindly sponsored two prizes  for Nearest the Pin, which was won by Geoff Batstone and Most Balls Lost, which was jointly awarded to Jim and Toni Atkins for their contribution to the  recent boom in share prices at Top Flite!!!

RESULTADOS DE LA COMPETICIÓN STABLEFORD CELEBRADA EL 1 DE MARZO EN EL CLUB DE GOLF EL BOSQUE, CHIVA Este mes  vimos los típicos días de temperaturas frías al principio, seguidos por otros más cálidos y luminosos mas tarde, aunque los fuertes vientos hicieron que marcáramos una de las puntuaciones mas bajas en una competición hasta la fecha. El ganador del mes fue  Mick Newman (Handicap 24) quién ganó la cuenta atrás con 27 puntos. Finalista quedó el jugador del año, Chis Ward (hándicap 24) también con 27 puntos. Nuestros agradecimientos para Mike  de  quién amablemente patrocinó los trofeos Nearest the Pin, que fue ganado por Geoff Batstone  y el de Bolas Perdidas, que resulto ganado conjuntamente por  Jim  y Toni Atkins, con su contribución a que se dispararan las acciones en bolsa de la “Liga del Revoloteo”!! . Norman Tong ganó el otro  Nearest the Pin  en el hoyo 12. Finalmente Skip se embolsó los 27 euros por adivinar correctamente que perdería 35 bolas ese día. La competición del mes próximo se celebrará el Lunes 3 de Mayo y podéis reservar vuestras plazas llamando a  Skip en el  962133126 ó 628148939. Hasta entonces...Feliz golfing...!!   Tigger.

Norman Tong won the other Nearest the Pin on the 12th hole. Finally Skip won the 27 euros for correctly guessing that we would lose 35 balls on the day.   Next month`s competition will be held on Monday 3rd May and you can reserve your place by calling Skip on 962133126 or 628148939.  Until next time...Happy Golfing....!  Tigger


to our mind blowing puzzles From Page 22

Petrol Pump Attendant: The attendant had been on the night shift and shouldn’t have been sleeping!

HOTEL: He was playing Monopoly

Running into the forest: You can only run a half way INTO the forest and after that you are running OUT of the forest.

ARK: None - It was Noah’s Ark!

How did you make out?



Don Quixote Competition

Winning Entries December & January Don Quijote está escondido en algún lugar de esta revista. Para ayudarle, aquí es un ejemplo de cómo él mirará.

Don Quixote is hiding somewhere in this magazine. To help you, here is an example of how he will look. If you find him,

Si lo encuentras, envía tu respuesta por correo electrónico a

send your answer by email to

El plazo está abierto hasta el último día de cada mes. La primera entrada sacada por una “mano inocente” de la bolsa el primer día del mes siguiente a ganará un premio.

Open until the last day of each month. The first entry drawn out of the bag on the 1st of the next month will win a prize.

Widdle Wabbit

  A   precious little girl walks into a pet shop and   asks, in   the sweetest little lisp, between two missing teeth,  “Excuthe me, mithter,  do you keep widdle wabbits?” As  the shopkeeper’s heart melts, he gets down on his knees so  that e’s   on her level and asks, “Do you want a widdle white   wabbit, or   a thoft and fuwwy, bwack wabbit, or maybe one like that cute  widdle bwown  wabbit over there?”    She,  in turn, blushes, rocks on her heels, puts  her hands  on her knees, leans forward and says, in a tiny quiet voice ...... “I  don’t think my python weally gives a thit.”


to our Gold Bar Riddle From Page 19. The wise man told the merchant to line up the camels with their drivers and sacks of gold and to number each man from 1 to 10. Then, he was to take 1 bar of gold from the first driver, 2 from the second, 3 from the third and so on, until the 10th driver handed over 10 bars of gold. The merchant was to weigh all of these bars together. Had there been no thief the combined weight ought to have been 550 lbs. (10 + 20 + 30 + 40 + 50 + 60 + 70 + 80 + 90 + 100 = 550) If the gold bars weighed only 540 lbs for intance, camel driver number 10 must be the dishonest man., for only he could have reduced the total by 10 lbs. If the total was 7 lb light, then of course driver number 7 must be the culprit, for only he had handed over 7 bars, each 1 lb light. Did anyone get this one right?








By Dave Mellor

If I was to say Casey Stoner likes this place, it’d be an understatement! The Ducati mounted Aussie finished the 2nd day test at the top of the table, one of only 4 riders to dip into the 1’55s. Needless to say his closest rival was Valentino Rossi. He took his Fiat Yamaha to within a quarter of a second of Stoners time. Andrea Dovizioso posted the 3rd best time, out shining his Repsol Honda team mate, Dani Pedrosa, who could only manage 13th. Another surprise was rookie American Ben Spies. Despite a fall Ben was the only other rider in touch. I don’t suppose the Tech 3 Yamaha rider should surprise us, tipped for greatness by non other than Mick Doohan, he is more than just fast, he shows a knowledge of machine set up, professionalism and determination that rivals Doohan himself! Nicky Hayden was ‘best of the rest’ 5th place, proving the Kentucky Kid is back in the game. It’s fair to say he hasn’t clicked with his Ducati until now, and I hope that this year, the shaky voice doesn’t return. In other news, Spain gets it’s 4th GP this year, after Hungary again failed to finish it’s by now infamous Balatone ring circuit. The gp will now be held on the same day, 19 September, at,the frankly superb, Aragon motor park in Aragon. Got to be worth a look at that one eh?

Si dijera que a Casey Stoner le gusta su puesto sería decir poco. El australiano montado en su Ducati acabó la prueba de dos días el primero de la lista, fue el único de los cuatro motoristas que alcanzó los 1,55 segundos. No hace falta decir que su rival más próximo fue Valentino Rossi, quien llevó su Fiat Yamaha a tan sólo un cuarto de segundo del tiempo marcado por Stoner. Andrea Dovizosio marcó el tercer mejor tiempo, dejando atras a su compañero en el equipo Honda, Dani Pedrosa, quien solamente logró el puesto decimotercero.


Otra sorpresa nos la dio el novato americano Ben Spies. A pesar de una caida, Ben fue el único que logró coger el punto de la carrera. No creo que el motorista de la Tech 3 Yamaha nos sorprenda. Recomendado por su grandeza nada menos que por Mick Doohan, Ben no es solamente rápido si no que demuestra que conoce a su máquina, con un profesionalismo que rivaliza con el mismo Doohan. Nicky Hayden fue el mejor “del montón”, su quinto puesto prueba que el chico de Kentucky ha regresado al terreno de juego. Es justo decir que no se ha adaptado a su Ducati, hasta ahora, y esperamos  que la voz agitada no le  vuelva  a traicionar otra vez este año. Hablando de otras noticias, España cumple su cuarto aniversario en MotoGP este año, después de que Hungria fallara en  terminar su ahora imfamoso circuito de Balatone. El GP se celebrará en el mismo día, 19 de Septiembre, en el francamente estupendo Aragon Motorpark, en, bueno, si en Aragon. Vale la pena mirar donde esta eso, ¿Eh...?   



Important To advertise here for free, email ......... CLASSIFIEDS MUST be with us by the 1st of the month please and will be placed for ONE month only. If you wish to repeat it please send in again otherwise we will assume sold! FOR A QUICKER SALE? Advertise it in both! BRITCHAT & Guide2Valencia Not only do you get a free Classified with Britchat, space permitting, we will give you more space in Guide2Valencia and you can have 4 photos and UNLIMITED text, all for FREE! All you have to do, is become a MEMBER at

and make up your own classified advert.


Wanted Lonely expat. needs company. If you’d like a chat over a cup of tea please phone Gill.   962 665 873.   Could Nieves please contact me again?  I’ve lost your number.


Furniture, tools, garden pots & furniture, kitchen equipment and MORE Directions: Through Real, towards Catadau, go over the bridge, just outside Real. Take the first right. Serreta Baixa Follow this road and the villa on the corner of a right hand turn. Look out for signs. Park on the road and grass verges. Call Amanda 625 819 734 or email amandainvalencia@ for information and directions.


Bicycles 1 Gents 12 gears 1 Ladies 10 gears Rayleigh made. Very good condition.  20€  each Tel 961648404 Lliria area

VOLKSWAGEN Golf 1.8 T GTi. 4,895 euros

ono. 2003Hatchback. 90,000 miles. Manual 1.8L Petrol Silver ,original alloy wheels,3 Doors, Manual, Hatchback, Petrol, 90,000 miles. Air conditioning, Height adjustable drivers seat, recently serviced and fitted with new cam belt. Nice condtition perfect for taking back to the uk. Right hand drive uk plates. 659459674.

Various Items

4 Solar panels, 6 batteries and an inverter. €4,000. A Whirlpool washing machine, hardly used, €250. 50cc Honda strimmer with accesories. also €250. Gas fridge, 9 months old €400. Olivia: 664589626 Macastre.

Various Items

Gates, 2x2.20m, 80 euros Gates, 2x.160m. 80 euros Gas fridge-freezer, 195 euros Sink with cabinet and mirror, NEW still in boxes, 85 euros tel. 961125514 / 687217661 MOBILE -648669491 OR LANDLINE - 961647829 (CASINOS AREA )


Various Items

Scooter - “Piaggio,” 50 cc, only 5,000 ktrs, accessories inc. ITV (1 year left) - €450. Freezer - “Edesa”, under work top, 3 draw, nearly new, was €269 new - €120. Mountain Bike - 15 speed, only used twice €25 2 x Radiators - portable, oil filled, €15 each Fan portable, 1x upright (3 speed oscillating) €10 Fan - portable, small, variable speed - €10


Montserrat area - Call 687 486 909

Codeword Each letter in this puzzle is represented by a number 1-26. Can you crack the code and solve the crossword? Every letter of the alphabet is used at least once. Three letters are already in place to get you started. All words are in English.




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