Grand Traverse Woman
mommatrouble 1412 (in the) hood 1611
BY KERRY WINKLER
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I KNEW it would happen eventually. My kids were finally old enough
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MAX AND BROOK MAKING PLANS TO CAUSE TROUBLE.
could have happened. Did they almost get run over? Was it dusk? Were there kidnappers nearby? What had actually popped the tire? A madman with a knife chasing them? Another confession was a trip to the nearby mini-golf course. More “emergency” money spent. The upset is that it is our family tradition to go together once a summer. Only once. Because it’s a treat and did I say FAMILY tradition. But they had: 1) gone without me, 2) added insult to injury by using my money, 3) apparently liked it better without me since there was lots of laughter in the retelling of the adventure. The good news was only one meal was cooked (although noodles were thrown out since they were mush). Two pizzas ordered. No veggies consumed. A whopping $8 was returned out of the $60 fund. Not a single one of my six friends got a call. Grandpa’s Jeep and fourwheeler were thoroughly washed, refueled and, most importantly, returned. And I’m guessing they are both counting down until the next time I leave!
Kerry Winkler is the account director and copublisher of Grand Traverse Woman Magazine. She lives with her 2 teenage kids in Interlochen and one has recently hit the roads with his license so she's getting grayer by the day. She loves being active outdoors and also teaches fitness classes locally at Fit For You Gym. She can be reached at kerry@grandtraversewoman.com.
NORTHERN ART PHOTOGRAPHY
to be left home alone for the weekend. I had weekend plans, and my kids had opted to stay home alone for the first time. For weeks leading up to the weekend, I campaigned heavily that they come along since I was sure they’d suffer from bouts of loneliness, hunger and meals that may or may not burn the house down. They scoffed. They were no dummies. These kids wanted freedom! To make matters worse, I was going into a no-cell coverage area so I had to make major safety plans, including a list of six (overkill) emergency numbers. Grandpa (who lives next door) was out of town, Aunt Kandy was going with me, Aunt Lori was such a long ways away (20 minutes). So I alerted any and all of my friends to get ready for THE call. There was sure to be a disaster, right? They scoffed at me too, but dutifully agreed to be at the ready. Then I left $60 cash with the allotment of $20 pizza, $20 groceries, $20 emergency. Pizza one night would reduce the worry of losing my house to an all-consuming fire. Then, since I would have the car with me, did they need a car for emergencies? The pizza man delivered, so no need, right? But Max was on it. A quick call to Grandpa, and Max had secured his grandfather’s Jeep for the weekend. A Jeep? (Chick magnet!) I quickly set the limits of no travel outside of 10 miles, and his sister had to be with him at all times. (Chick repellent.) I left Saturday with a dozen kisses on each of their faces and hit the road. I started to feel lighter the farther I got from home and reasoned I’d raised good kids with common sense. (Jury is still out though.) I spent the weekend enjoying myself, keeping the worry at bay. Finally back into cell service I called them and they answered with an exasperated: We are fine, Mom. Until I got home. Then the confessions began. Max had taken the Jeep for a carefree ride on his own. I raised my eyebrows and waited for the WHERE? to be answered. He claimed church and had an alibi to prove it. This felt like a foolproof plan (maybe he does have common sense after all). I couldn’t yell at him since God was on his side. And Max was known for visiting new churches to check out the who/what/why of that religion. I let it slide. Next, they admitted shenanigans with Grandpa’s four-wheeler since they could borrow it without anyone knowing…And that they had run out of gas a mile from home. This one was a little more concerning. First, were helmets worn? Yes. Was Grandpa going to be pleased with the hijacking his four-wheeler? Some stammering, and then they admitted they had called Grandpa and asked if they could go for a little ride (note, not a loooong ride). And how did they even get the gas? Duh, with the emergency money. (Eye roll here.) What else happened while I was gone a mere 36 hours? Oh, yes… they had taken a lengthy bike ride and Brook’s bike tire had popped. They’d calmly walked home, no big deal. My mind raced with what
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