Tough Love

by David Beckmann

First Corinthians was a hard letter for Paul to write. He loved these people, but they had a lot of problems that he had to address and even rebuke them for. As he concludes, at one point, Paul pauses and inserts a list of five commands, all related to one another by their importance for a faithful Christian church. He writes in Chapter 16, Verses 13 & 14:

In our day, with an increasing worldliness in our churches, and with the increasing anti-Christian pressure from the world without, we must be watchful and on our guard. We have to pay attention to what is going on in our homes, our churches, and our communities and care about keeping the Christian faith alive and true in them all. Otherwise, the devil is going to have his way with us. This is war.

This means we are going to have to be strong and act like the men we are. We cannot live the Christian faith without manly courage. We are sure to face the opposition of all sorts, depending on what we are dealing with. “Endure hardness as a good soldier of Jesus Christ” (2 Tim. 2:3). By watching and praying, we must keep our faith up and keep acting, or otherwise, we will fail to do our duty to keep the Church vital and to stay faithful to the Faith and our Lord. “Watch and pray, lest ye enter into temptation” (Mark 14:38).

Note the mention of love at the end of Verse 14. Obviously—in light of what he has just said—this is not a sentimental, milk-toast kind of love. Loving people can be one of the hardest things there is to do—just ask Jesus on the cross. No, Paul mentions love because it is always our chief duty. Whatever we have to deal with, we must handle it with love for God and love for our neighbor. That is why Paul—who is challenging him to be tough too—tells Timothy that when it comes to people who need correcting, we must be gentle and patient with them (II Tim. 2:24). That does not mean we do not confront them at times (II Tim. 4:2) and perhaps even disturb their day a bit—remember Jesus and the money-changers. It is all in how you say it and do it, on a case-by-case basis.

What does love demand? Let’s face it, sometimes it takes all we have got to not get angry, to be patient, to think about what is best in a situation, and not give in to our passion. We need God’s grace of love to have a balance of qualities, a manly love. James Dobson is famous for his book Tough Love. That is a great phrase. The Lord gives us the grace to have a tough faith, tough obedience, and tough love for His glory. Amen.

About The Author The Rev. David Beckmann is an Anglican priest and Moderator of the C.S. Lewis Society of Chattanooga. Recently, he was director of the C. S. Lewis Study Centre at The Kilns, Oxford, UK. He blogs at revbeckmann.com.