Girlfriends Gathering Special Love Edition

1

GIRLFRIENDS GATHERING. 2019

Content

CHARLESTON AND TEMEKA - DATING LAWRENCE AND DEMTRESS - ENGAGED JOE AND TERESA - NEWLYWEDS THE PROCTORS - MARRIED 8 YRS THE CHASES - MARRIED 11 YRS THE BAILEYS - MARRIED 11 YRS THE THROWERS MARRIED - 13 YRS THE WADES - MARRIED 15 YRS THE FENNERS - MARRIED 22 YRS THE JOHNSONS - MARRIED 51 YRS

2

GIRLFRIENDS GATHERING. 2019

04

07 09 12 14

16

19 21

24 26

e h t m o r F r r e e t d t n e u L Fo This month its all about LOVE! I decided to celebrate some awesome couples. Some of the couples answered questions, some couples told their stories in their own words. Either way they have some amazing stories!

Check them out! I pray it bless you as it did me!!

Blessings!!

Temeka Davis

3

GIRLFRIENDS GATHERING. 2019

Meet

Charleston Johnson & Temeka Davis

Dating with Purpose Written by: Charleston Johnson 4

GIRLFRIENDS GATHERING. 2019

O

ne is a divorcee, so who’s really focusing on love after a failed marriage. The other one wasn’t looking either but had gotten so engaged in all her dreams, writing books, podcasts, magazine, the list goes on. So, whose looking for love? Umm, neither one. Charleston, just a decent country boy working, pastoring his church in deep east Texas. Single parent raising his daughter. He’s the father of two. Son, recently graduated living in Oklahoma. On July 13th, 2018 he received a call from a relative asking to care for her 7-year-old twins because of a CPS case. So being him, he takes them in and currently fosters them. Also, letting a relative move in with her daughter. So, with all these irons in the fire where does anyone else fit in. Temeka, a city girl living in the Arlington area, a mother of three boys, two being a set of 22 yr. old twin boys and an 18-year-old son.

Fully engaged in work, getting her book off the ground while working on a second one. Exactly no time for love.

fasting and praying for her future spouse. It was during that time God gave her a dream about a guy named Charles. Not knowing who Charles was, she just began to pray for him everyday. I guess not really knowing but was praying for me as I was going through my going through as they say. God told her that he was a man of God who held a high position in the church. She prayed for his son and daughter not even knowing that he would have a son and daughter. God spoke to her August 3rd she met Charleston August 3rd the next year. Exactly one year later. Everything that God showed her and spoke to her was starting to come to pass.

We ultimately exchanged numbers and started talking via telephone. I must admit, I have enjoyed every conversation held with this beautiful lady. I was asked to sit on a panel to talk about relationships etc. and she was the moderator. Finally, I would get to see her! The end of the week couldn’t get here quick enough.

Friday came and I made my way down Hwy 20 to see her.

Attending a small get together or kickback given by a relative.

Charleston, just needing a break from the same routine attended the event. Still wasn’t looking for love by no means, just looking to get away. While having a conversation with his cousin Darwin he say’s I know the right person that’s a good fit for you. Me being me I laughed, like whatever. He started describing this young lady.

I was like hmmm I don’t know. He told me her name so as most people do you go to Facebook and stalk their page which is what I did. Lol! I think she was stalking my page as well at least that’s what I’m telling myself!

Darwin who is her co-worker had spoke with her about me which she declined the offer at first stating that she was too busy and didn’t have time for anyone. Darwin wanted her to send me a friend request on Facebook which she declined as well then ultimately backing down saying I’ll be his friend, but he must be the one to send the request. So, I sent her a friend request she accepted, and we were just messaging each other via Facebook for awhile just checking on each other. I found out that she was hospitalized for a surgery that she had so I was praying for her healing and still just messaging her checking up on her. This went on for about three months or so.

What I found out later was that she had been in prayer for this guy name Charles who she didn’t know for the last year or so.

Anyway there was this challenge she was apart of called Pray for your future spouse. She was apart of this challenge for a week

5

GIRLFRIENDS GATHERING. 2019

The day of the panel event I was nervous as heck. I had never done anything like this before. I was excited to be on the panel but just to sit on the opposite end of the stage and look at this beautiful black queen in that black outfit just did it for me. I still smile thinking of her sitting there. Trying to stay focused on the questions but really thinking of her majority of the time but we made it through the panel discussion. She did an excellent job as host/moderator. I was dreading the trip of leaving her but was looking forward to seeing her very soon. Phone conversation are long regardless of the lack of sleep but listening to her breathe was well worth the lack of sleep. Lol. Yes, I was already looking forward to my next visit with her. I was ready to look at her and smile, I was ready to hear her laugh. All she did, I was ready to be there in person just to see her do it in person and not imagine it on my phone.

I finally got to make another trip with my children to see her and had a blast. We went skating! Yes, we went skating and enjoyed ourselves. The kids had a blast.

We attended her church that Sunday The Potter’s House of Dallas.

Totally enjoyed the atmosphere but just being in the house of God with a woman that loves to worship God is the most romantic thing in the world. It was time for us to depart ways again. I was dreading the good bye after church to head back to east Texas we hugged and parted ways. I was looking forward to seeing her again already.

My birthday was soon approaching, and I hadn’t really done anything special for my birthday. Nor had anyone for that fact but once. She made me feel super special that weekend. I didn’t know

how to react, but I was very appreciative because no one has to do anything for you, but she made me feel super special. Thanks again babe.

I must say the time I’ve had with her have been well worth it. I

6

GIRLFRIENDS GATHERING. 2019

regret none of it. I will continue to ask God for direction on our relationship as he take it to the next level. I want to continue to laugh for whatever reason she makes me laugh. I want to go to sleep with her being the last one on my mind. I want to wake up praying to God but her being my first thought. Whatever God has in store for me I want Temeka to be apart of it.

Meet

Lawrence & Demetress Engaged Couple

Wedding Date: May 18th 2019 7

GIRLFRIENDS GATHERING. 2019

S

hare some of the history of your relationship where you met how you became engaged and so on.

I wanted to get a tattoo and found him on facebook. I didn’t want anything special just my name. he usually don’t do names but he did it anyway. We were both in our own situations not looking for anyone but found each other. We talked and text sometimes. I also went to the shop to see him a couple of times. After that we didn’t talk or text that much and out of the blue he called me and we talked for a couple of minutes. After we hung up the phone I text him and asked him this question. Are you sure you’re ready for me? and his reply was we can Damn sure try and we have been together every since

Look back at some of the expectations you had before your engagement. How have they changed now?

We really have no expectations from one another. Were just us.

We believe that expectations can limit the growth of our relationship and/or the individual.

When you go into a relationship with expectations then there is no room for gratitude.

Talk about some of the responsibilities or changes you may not have been ready for and how you coped with them One of the changes is being with someone that takes care of you and that has your best interest at heart. We were not used to being with givers. Usually givers attract takers so when you get 2 givers together it’s an amazing feeling. Another change would be starting over with parenting. All of my children are grown and he at the time had a 3, 4 and 11 yr old. His parenting is very different from mine so we had to come together and discuss ways of discipline.

It has been a challenge but we get through it by compromising with one another. There is no book on parenting so we try to meet each other in the middle and come up with ideas that we both think is fair.

Share some of your difficult times be as open as you are comfortable with, How did these times affect your relationship with God and each other?

Just common disagreements such as learning to respect each others boundaries. Giving each other space when needed.

Learning simply how to talk to one another in a way that doesn’t come off as condescending or rude. Doing these things created a platform for us to build on. It didn’t affect our relationship with God it just made us stronger as a couple.

Share some of the blessings that you have received. How have they brought you together We found our equal. We are supporters and encouragers of one another. We challenge each other to go to the next level. It’s an amazing feeling to truly find a love that matches your love. I have found my best-friend. Our love feeds off of each other What are some of the things that you do to keep your relationship growing.

We talk, communicate, plan and share our feelings with one another. even when they’re not good feelings.

What special role has your relationship with God played in your relationship?

It helped us know our value and it helped us know what we were looking for in a relationship. Our relationship with God helped us become better mates. A better wife, husband, mother, father and individual as a whole.

Talk about marriage as something that needs to be continually nurtured and allowed to grow Marriage is always something that you have to continue to work on. You have to keep the sparks flying and the love alive and not allow it to die and wither away. Water it like you do flowers and seeds. What you put into it is what you get out of it so make sure you use love, loyalty, hard work, communication, dedication, respect, trust and most importantly God as your ingredients. Not saying that you will not have trials but you will be in a place where you can get through them together by edifying each other and loving one another even during the difficult times.

8

GIRLFRIENDS GATHERING. 2019

Meet the Meyer’s

Joe and Teresa Newlyweds Married 10 months

9

GIRLFRIENDS GATHERING. 2019

S

hare some of the history of your marriage - where you met, how you became engaged, and so on.

We met a restaurant/nightclub called Chaucer’s on a random Saturday night. My best friend and I went to dinner at Olive Garden.

When we left, we saw so many people outside this nightclub that we decided that we had to check it out. Dressed in a t-shirt and jeans surrounded by women in tight dresses, I went to the bar for a drink. He approached me and asked if he could buy it for me and started up a conversation. I proceeded to tell him “I am not the one” and that he is not going home with me. Then I gave him my number. Yes, I surprised myself too. We went on a date the next day and the rest is history.

Our engagement was the best. I literally couldn’t have asked for it any other way. We got engaged in Barbados, where my parents are from. He took me to a beach dinner in Barbados where he wined and dined me and danced under the stars. But no, he did not propose that day. I swore I was going home a single woman.

But the day before we left, he took me to a restaurant, and we walked on the beach. He started talking to me about how much he loved me and our future together. Then he hugged me and got on one knee and asked me to marry him. A surprise photographer was there to capture the photos and the look on my face when he asked me. Best moment ever!

Look back on some of the expectations you had before marriage.

How have they changed now?

Before we got married, we were not living together. We thought life would be just as carefree after marriage as it was before.

Everything would be sunshine, rainbows and pure romance.

Now we realize, we have goals and responsibilities that we hold each other accountable for in our marriage. Everything may not be sunshine and rainbows, but we enjoy the day-to-day of making it work and figuring out what works for us and our marriage. We are a team that helps each other reach our goals and overcome obstacles.

Talk about some of the responsibilities or changes you might not have been ready for and how you coped with them.

Joe: Early on in our marriage, we coped with health issues. Right after our honeymoon, she was admitted to the hospital several times and underwent minor surgery. Quickly I had to learn the meaning of in sickness and in health. In order to cope with this major change, I leaned on God and found an outlet in writing.

Teresa: For me, I felt inadequate as a wife because of my health issues. I wasn’t able to be as active as I wanted to be, prepare dinner for my new husband or be as intimate as I felt I should have been as newlywed. The only thing that helped me cope was prayer and the strength God gave me to move forward and trust him that everything was going to better. He was my ultimate peace.

Share some of the difficult times—be as open as you are comfortable with. How did these times affect your relationship with God and with each other?

The most difficult time was watching my dad get sick and pass.

As far as our relationship, it only made us stronger. I truly fell in love with his compassion and his strength. I was broken in ways that only those who have lost their parents slowly to a disease could understand. He held the pieces together and did not let go as much as I might have tried to make him through my sorrow.

10

GIRLFRIENDS GATHERING. 2019

My relationship with God was also challenged. I didn’t understand why my father had to suffer and go through what he went through.

My dad, a servant of God, an evangelist had to suffer in that way.

It took time for me to be at peace with what had happened and with God. Share some of the blessings you have received. How have they brought you together?

The biggest blessing, we had was to be able to have the wedding and honeymoon of our dreams. I felt very fortunate to be able to have that experience with his family and mine who came all the way from Barbados. Wedding planning helped us learn to work together to accomplish goals. If you want to learn each other and how to work together, plan a wedding! Lol Talk about marriage as something that needs to be continually nurtured and allowed to grow?

Allow for mistakes, allow for apologies, allow for forgiveness and allow for growth. There is no limit when it comes to these three things. I have only been married since April, but I have learned that.

What are some of the special things you do to keep your relationship growing?

We constantly make an effort to learn about each other and execute our ever-changing goals together. In addition, we encourage each other to strengthen our relationship in God and encourage each other when one of us falls short What special role has your faith in God played in your marriage?

God has played an essential role in our marriage. He is who we turn to when we are going through problems in or out of marriage.

He is a vital source of our peace. From the beginning, we have gone to church together, attended marital classes and workshops.

We wanted our faith to be the foundation of our marriage.

What does the future hold for you two?

We look forward to building a home together and filling it with love and children. Our hope is to someday to become entrepreneurs and work for ourselves, so we have the freedom to spend time with each other and our families. We want to create wealth that will set our children and grandchildren up for generations.

How did you know when you were in love?

Joe: When I realized I could be myself around her, she loved me just the way I am. She is my best friend in every way possible. She has pushed me to be my best self and encouraged me to go for my dreams and helped me believe in myself. Something only a potential wife could do.

Teresa: I realized I was in love when I watched him interact with my dad. My dad rarely liked so when he was asking if he could come over, I knew he had the stamp of approval. On top of that, he treated me like a princess. I had never been with someone I could depend on and trust entirely. He took the time out to make me feel special and loved and showed AND told me it every single day.

What did your parents think about him and his parents about you?

My mom is a bit harsh at first. She wants a graduate from Harvard or Yale along with a Nobel peace prize and who has great manners and knows about Caribbean food. High standards is putting it lightly. But his heart won her over, when he asked if she needed anything or helped clean up the house. His unfiltered love for me.

She knew I was not letting him go and she didn’t want me to either.

11

GIRLFRIENDS GATHERING. 2019

:) You already know my dad liked him!

Joe: My parents loved Teresa from the beginning. They knew my last relationship was difficult and saw how much she cared and supported me. My mom and dad have always expressed how happy she was to have someone in her son’s life who was a positive influence in my life.

Meet the Proctor’s

David and Deidre

Married 8 Years 12

GIRLFRIENDS GATHERING. 2019

O

ur story starts with 1 minute you don’t know each other exists, and literally the next minute you don’t know how you existed without each other.

How and where did you meet your spouse?

Deidre: We met through an online dating site. I had decided the day we met that I was getting off those sites. There were crazies online as well as offline. I was ready to take the time to totally focus on me.

When I got ready to remove my account, I saw I had a message. I opened the message and there was David, a white man.

David: I actually saw Deidre on another Dating site and her picture always stayed in my mind. I didn’t contact her, though. I don’t know why really, perhaps fear of rejection. When I saw her picture again, I knew I had to reach out to her. And hope she would respond.

Deidre: I did respond. We began messaging back and forth but my internet connection was terrible, so I made the decision to give him my phone number. He immediately called and we had a really good conversation. He ended the call by asking me out for lunch the next day. Well the next day happened to be my birthday, so I said yes! We met up at the restaurant at the same time, which was around 11 am. When he walked over to me, I said to myself, “am I really doing this? “(I had never dated a white man before.) Well, I said to myself, “at least he is not ugly.”

David: When I saw her, I realized I was actually on a date with a Black woman. But after we sat down and stated talking, all I saw was a beautiful woman. We talked a very long time. I felt very comfortable talking with her and didn’t want the date to end.

Deidre: When I first walked in, I just knew every single Black person was starring and disapproving the two of us being together. At least that was in my head. I found myself making a conscious decision not to look any black person in the eye. I felt that I was being less Black by dating this White man. But as he kept talking to me, I was totally in to him. My birthday is on Valentine’s day and he thoughtfully handed me 2 cards, a birthday card and a Valentine’s day card. I thought that was so sweet. When we looked at the time it was almost 6 pm!!! We had stayed at the restaurant for 7 hours talking!!!! When he walked me to my car, he said wait a minute. He came back with a dozen roses!!! Wow! David: I waited to give her the flowers because I wanted to give her an additional surprise.

How did you become engaged?

Deidre: That was on a Sunday. He drove an hour to see me on the following Tuesday and every day the rest of that first week. He would work all day. Get off around 5:30pm, drive to my place stay a couple of hours, go back home and be at work at 6 am the next day.

David: I did that because I was very excited about seeing her and we had a lot in common. But most of all I did not want to be separated from her for any length of time. I knew that she was special and by the end of the first week, I was already falling in love with her.

Deidre: We were inseparable. Two months later he proposed. The next month we drove to Tennessee and he met my parents. My father and brother were a little standoffish, but my sister n law and mother loved him. At the end of that month we got married. It didn’t take long before my father embraced and loved David, too.

Talk about some of the responsibilities or changes you might not have been ready for and how you coped with them?

Deidre: Because of all of my past hurts, it was not love at first sight for me, but I knew from day one that this was a good man. And I loved being with him. He was a man who loved God and he was a praying man. And after time, one day it hit me, I love this man with all my heart and soul.

David: As an interracial couple, there are challenges we face that we normally would not face if we were of the same race. For example: when we travel around the country, there are some places that my wife feels very uncomfortable as we still get stares or unfriendly looks. There are places that I would not take her, because I know she would not be welcomed. But we know that God has a plan for our lives and that our fears are always quieted by our faith in Him. Deidre: The good thing is that we have never had a disagreement or argument over any racial issues. We love people and we pray for those whose heart is hardened against another’s race.

David: One of the challenges for me was the first time I had to go to my wife’s family reunion. There were over 100 Black people there and I was the only White guy. However, my fears were put aside as soon as we arrived as they accepted me and treated me like family.

I wanted to cry. I was truly blessed to know her family loved me, too.

I love them more.

Deidre: I must say, we are truly blessed because when asked about our cultural difference, the differences were not negative or things we had to overcome in order for our marriage to work. It was more lack of knowledge of the reality of how we each were brought up.

For example, in one of our conversations, I told him how my parents always packed a great lunch when we drove from the north to the south to visit my relatives. I told him (even though I did not know it at the time, I just loved my mother’s fried chicken on our long trips) we could not stop at the restaurants on the way. He was so surprised.

Now, he is a year older than I am, so I was surprised that he was surprised. But in his household, the civil right movement wasn’t’ discussed nor was the reality of it touching his life as his parents were in that group that kept moving to the “suburbs”.

What are some of the things you do to keep your relationship growing?

Deidre: One of the things we do to keep our marriage strong is pray together and work in the ministry at our church together. We also love trying different restaurants when we can. We don’t do a certain date night because that takes away a part of love’s spontaneity. We just decide any given time to go to the movies, have a Saturday morning breakfast at a new spot, things like that.

What does/did your parents think about your spouse?

David: But a main activity that we both thoroughly enjoy is taking road trips. We enjoy spending time together exploring old and new places and creating new experiences and memories.

His Mother was receptive to me at first simply because she wanted him to be happy. But we have grown to love each other dearly.

What special role has Faith in God played in your marriage?

David: My father passed away several years ago. I felt he would not have approved of me marrying a Black woman because of the racist comments spoken when I was a child. However, one of my best childhood friends was a black child.

We trust in God and put Him first in all of our decisions. We know the closer we are to Him, the closer we grow together.

13

GIRLFRIENDS GATHERING. 2019

How and where did you meet your spouse?

Meet the Chase’s

Demetrous & Tynika

Married 11 years 14

GIRLFRIENDS GATHERING. 2019

Mike and I met at Taco Bell in Meadowbrook in 1993, where we both worked.

How did you become engaged?

We became engaged on my birthday Nov 8, 2007. We married on January 6, 2008. He is my first love. We have 5 beautiful children, one beautiful daughter Deja & four handsome sons DJ, Darious, DaVayun & Dailunn Chase.

Talk about some of the responsibilities or changes you might not have been ready for and how you coped with them?

One of our major challenges was having different church homes.

But we definitely make it work. We serve the same God, but we attend two different church homes. Some might think it’s crazy, but we have discussed this with our Pastors and for right now this works for us.

What special role has your faith in God played in your marriage?

Faith plays a very special role in our marriage that how it’s lasted for the past 11 years. God is the head of our home, Mike is 2nd and I am his rib. In the beginning of our marriage I didn’t work, and he held it down, that was faith because I had a lot of growing to do and didn’t want to work. I felt that since before we got married, I had the kids 24/7 and worked. So, in my mind it was his turn. But that wasn’t the case and it wasn’t fair to him. Once I went back to work a lot of our problems were gone, due to income.

What does/did your parents think about your spouse?

My parents adore and love Mike as their own since day one.

They have never called him their son n law, but their son. I was extremely close to Mike’s mother and grandmother. His siblings are my siblings and the same for him.

15

What are some of the things you do to keep your relationship growing?

I truly believe that you have to keep it interesting. I sometimes play the girlfriend and he’s my boyfriend. We sometimes surprise each other with a night out or even a weekend. Send each other special cards to let each other know how we appreciate and love each other.

Words from the couple We are at the point in our life where we completely trust each other, respect, love & honor our marriage and vowels. It hasn’t always been like that. We we’re young and not ready for the adult life. Can’t say I had baby momma drama, because I didn’t. We had to grow up also. Oh yeah, I did not birth our oldest 2, but they are not my step children. The word step is not allowed in our home. We are one big family and I mean BIG!! This Chase team is happy, growing on our faith, loving life, excited about our future and growing old together. Something we would always tell married couples is God, spouse, children, family. What goes on in our marriage stays in our marriage.

Another Chance at Love How and where did you meet your spouse?

Meet the Bailey’s

Kevin & Yolanda

Married 11 years Anniversary: April 15th 16

GIRLFRIENDS GATHERING. 2019

Kevin: I met my wife at church back in 2005. She had a very humble spirit and was a dynamic singer with the anointing from God. One Sunday afternoon, she was on program to sing at another church and I surprised her by showing up to demonstrate my support.

That marked the beginning of our string of communication, which eventually led to marriage in 2007.

Talk about some of the responsibilities or changes you might not have been ready for and how you coped with them?

Yolanda: Marrying a preacher definitely changed the dynamics of my life. It forced me to see things through a totally different set of lenses, while realizing that we were even being seen by others through a different set of lenses. Magnifying glasses, that is. As

a preacher’s wife, it is even a greater responsibility to cover my husband in prayer and help him to meet or succeed in ministry, and life in general. In Genesis 2:18 (NLT) the Lord God says “……I will make a helper who is just right for him.” I will say to the women who are dying to be the “preacher’s wife”, please be very cognitive of what your request entails, for this role is serious business and truly comes with a great responsibility. To whom much is given, much is certainly required.

mindset, and how I respond to situations, makes all the difference in the world. Have I always responded in the best way? God knows I have not, but I strive daily to be more like Christ, to be the wife my husband needs, and one who God is pleased with. Marriage is considered a three-stranded cord for a reason, and just like the umbilical cord from a mother to her unborn child, each cord serves a majorly important purpose for the life of the marriage. “A threefold cord is not quickly broken.” Ecclesiastes 4:12

One of the things that has helped me to cope, is having divine connections with other couples in ministry who God has used to pour into us. They have been willing to truthfully share experiences along their pilgrimage, and point us back to God.

How did you know when you were in love?

Kevin: In the beginning of our relationship I knew that I was in love with my wife. We bonded and did things together. The support that she had for me was very positive and unwavering.

How did you become engaged?

Kevin: After dating for about a year, I knew that it was time to make Yolanda my wife. With my preaching ministry, I felt like it was a winning situation and bond. I believed we would make a good team, so I proposed…and then I proposed again 9 years later. I’ll let my wife tell you more about that.

Look back on some of the expectations you had before your marriage. How have they changed now?

Yolanda: Out of complete honesty, our marital journey has often strayed from the path I had envisioned for us. I would be deceiving myself to say that every sunrise and sunset has been peaches and cream. Truth be told, at one point, we spent almost two years of sunrises and sunsets apart from each other. Yes, you heard it right.

Kevin and I married each other twice (absolutely not on my list of expectations). I’ll admit, I was the one who felt as if there was no other solution to the issues we were facing. I have since made a choice to learn from our not-so-pretty realities. I believe my

17

GIRLFRIENDS GATHERING. 2019

Talk about marriage as something that needs to be continually nurtured and allowed to grow.

Yolanda: I look at it like this. A flower needs light and water or it will wither away and die. A vehicle needs regular maintenance or it will sooner or later stop running and cease to serve its ultimate purpose. A kitchen requires constant attention and cleaning, or else… dirty dishes will begin to pile up, old food will mold and rot (attracting flies & causing maggots), and bacteria/germs will fester, causing a toxic environment. Our bodies need nourishment or they will suffer and eventually die. I think you get the picture here. What I’ve learned is, a marriage with no regular nourishment, maintenance, and attention (whatever this may look like for each union) is fated for failure and doomed for defeat.

What does/did your parents think about your spouse?

Kevin: My parents were excited for the two of us. They saw the excitement and joy that she and I brought each other. I’m sure that

both parents felt like my wife would be able to keep me on the straight and narrow. Laugh out loud!

marriage. Ultimately, we have been blessed with God’s favor and His amazing grace.

What are some of the things you do to keep your relationship growing?

What advice would you give to another couple who may be going through a rough patch in their marriage?

Yolanda: Besides much prayer, some of the practical things we do are:

• •

• • • • • • •

Work on how we communicate.

Thank each other often.

Offer encouragement and support.

Demonstrate our love with gifts.

Find time to do things together.

Acknowledge each other’s feelings as valid.

Agree to disagree.

•

•

Share some of the difficult times. How did these times affect your relationship with God and with each other?

• Kevin: Some of the difficult parts in our marriage has been the fact that I’m eleven years Yolanda’s senior. Of course I felt like I knew more about life and a lot of situations, than she did. There have been times when I guess I have had a tendency to try and play the father role to my wife. I quickly learned this approach did not set very well with her.

Since we were reared very differently from one another, it has sometimes presented obstacles we had to work around. We both grew up in households with blended families, but we’ve had to set aside what may have been good for our parents’, and decide what works best for “our” blended family. We have 4 biological children each. Being there for all of our children and grandchildren without anyone feeling neglected, has been a challenge at times. Some children/grandchildren simply require more attention than others.

My wife has been with me through thick and thin. During the death of my parents, I was blessed to have her right by my side. Even in my severe sickness, I must say that she nurtured me back to a healthy state of being. Although I still have some issues, she is there 100%. These difficult times caused us to lean on God more, which made us closer.

What special role has your faith in God played in your marriage?

Yolanda: Without faith in God, I just don’t know where we would be today as a married couple. I know for sure we would have never crossed paths and reunited a second time. Anytime two people can divorce one another and come back together, you better believe God’s Holy Angels are at work and the Holy Spirit is moving. My husband shared with me how he prayed while we were disconnected, and even asked others (whose walk with God he respected) to join him in prayer regarding the situation. All I can say is, it’s a miracle. God in heaven knows I had no desire to reconnect, let alone remarry…but God. I have no doubt He has been the bridge to carry us over the sometimes troubled waters, and the lifeline to bring our marriage back to life at the brinks of flat lining. Our story is a true testimony of God’s power and grace, and how He so lovingly gives us another chance!

Share some of the blessings you have received. How have they brought you together?

Kevin: There have been many blessings received by my wife and I. We have been blessed to serve together in ministry, we’ve been blessed financially, blessed to travel together, blessed to witness the birth of our grandchildren, blessed to help and do nice things for others, and blessed to have a second chance at

18

GIRLFRIENDS GATHERING. 2019

• •

• •

•

Value each other, as you value yourself.

Know that healthy and effective communication is detrimental for a healthy and successful marriage. It is impossible to know what’s not communicated at all and difficult to understand that which is not communicated well.

Be mindful of the words you speak, for they can build up or tear down your marriage. Proverbs 16: 24 (NLT) says “Kind words are like honey - sweet to the soul and healthy for the body.”

Read “The 5 Love Languages” by Dr. Gary Chapman which teaches how to better express our needs to our spouse, while also better understanding their needs and how to make him/her feel loved and respected.

Study one another (habits, likes, dislikes, needs, etc.) as if preparing for the test of a lifetime.

Agree on the better person to handle the finances; you’ll both benefit from it.

Seek and receive only wise counsel/marital advice for a lasting result and a beautiful outcome, knowing that God’s plan supersedes all else. Proverbs 19: 20-21 (NLT) “Get all the advice and instruction you can, so you will be wise the rest of your life. You can make many plans, but the Lord’s purpose will prevail.”

Know that what happens at home, should stay at home, unless it is agreed that it will help another couple, or it is life threatening.

Marriage can be one of the most precious, beautiful, and rewarding things in life, if it is viewed that way by both the husband and the wife, and both are willing to put the necessary work in.

Love is always the answer!

Meet the Thrower’s

Frederick & Charlonda Older and wiser, couple reunited after nearly 10 years apart Source: Dallas Morning News – February 2007 Updates from 2019, added by Charlonda Thrower 19

GIRLFRIENDS GATHERING. 2019

W

hen Frederick Thrower saw Charlonda Mathis at a San Antonio military-base hangout, he decided he needed a plan to get her to notice him.

He’d certainly noticed her: “I remember she had on a white dress, and her hair was cut in a short bob,” says Frederick, of that night in 1992. “I started acting a little goofy to break the ice. She wasn’t too into me.”

Fortunately for him, the two continued running into each other during the following weeks.

“One night, we were all playing cards, and here he comes again,” she says. “All of the sudden, I thought, ‘You know what? He’s kind of handsome.’”

By that time, she’d learned that he was divorced and had two young sons. The two began dating, and soon things got serious.

Fast-forward to 1995, when everything was still going smoothly. In Charlonda’s mind, anyway.

But Frederick had an announcement: He was going back to his ex-wife.

“I had two sons at that time,” recalls Frederick. “As a father, there was a point when I made a decision that I needed to be there for them.”

“So, he basically wanted to be a better man,” Charlonda adds. “He said, ‘I have to go back.’ At that time, he also found religion, but he broke my heart in the process.”

It took her a long time to recover. Besides work and graduate school, “I did not go out of the house for nine months,” she says. “I wouldn’t date; I couldn’t look at another man. I was so devastated.”

Frederick stayed with his wife for nine years and fathered two more sons. But, in the end, their problems outweighed the good he was trying to do by staying, he says, pointing to verbal abuse as one of their issues.

“We decided we need to do something; the kids don’t need to see all of this,” he says. “It was better for me to go.”

Frederick, who was living in Dallas, flew to San Antonio, where Charlonda lived at that time. When they met at the airport, “my heart was beating so fast and he was so nervous,” she says. “I felt bad for him.”

Still, “it was like everything I thought it would be,” he says. “She was looking beautiful, I’m nervous, but I’m wondering, ‘Could this actually be real? Is this real?’”

It was so real that they began dating immediately. Not that they didn’t have a few issues; Charlonda, for one, didn’t want history to repeat itself.

“I think I did a lot of testing of him,” she says.

Over the years, Frederick had often thought of Charlonda, “but it was in the sense of, ‘I had a good girl, and it’s over,’” he recalls.

He’d heard that she was in a relationship and had a son, but he still felt the need to apologize for abruptly ending their romance.

“I’d make little comments: ‘If you don’t like the way I wear my hair, are you going to leave me?’ I was distrusting in the beginning.

Because of the bad relationship I was in [with her son’s father], I’d lost a lot of trust, period.”

In 2003, he gave her a call.

“I also let her know that the love she gave me made me a better person,” he says. “I said, ‘You made me feel like a stronger man, better, like I could do anything. You always had my back and were always there for me.’ I just appreciated the way she made me feel.”

“I wasn’t hearing it,” Charlonda says. “It was kind of, ‘Oh, OK, yeah.

Whatever.’”

In 2005, he called again, this time to wish her a happy birthday. At that point, Charlonda had grown to view Frederick’s breakup from a parental perspective.

“His sons were in another state, and he’d told me, ‘I miss my sons,’” she says. “I didn’t know what a parent went through at that time. In 2005, I told him I didn’t blame him.”

That call led to many e-mails, which led to a decision to meet.

20

GIRLFRIENDS GATHERING. 2019

After they ironed out their doubts, it was time to discuss the wedding.

“We’d waited this long, so there was no ‘Let’s see if this will work out,’” Charlonda says. “We’re soul mates.”

They planned a big ceremony in San Antonio on March 4, 2006, but because Frederick’s father, a minister, couldn’t be there that day, he married them in a separate ceremony on Jan. 13 of that year. Charlonda then moved to Dallas, shortly after the ceremony.

“I tell her, ‘I love you so much I married you twice already,’” Frederick says, adding that his wife “encourages me to be a team.

I can’t imagine not having her.”

Fast forward to February 2019 and they are still going strong for 13 years and counting.

With blending their families, the couple has 5 sons and 1 daughter.

Their message to other couples is that “you have to communicate with one another…you have to be able to show your vulnerabilities without mocking the other person…But most of all you have to pray together, cry together and love one another without false pretenses….”

Meet The Wade’s

Darwin & LaKeisha Married 15 years 21

GIRLFRIENDS GATHERING. 2019

Share some of the history of your marriage. Where did you meet, how you became engaged and so on?

We met at Brookshire’s grocery in San Augustine, Texas during the late spring of 1997. Lakeisha was a cashier and Darwin was a sacker. We both worked there during high school. Darwin would sack each customer’s groceries and flirt during the day. His way of asking me out on a date was very unique. One day while at work Darwin called me to the back of the store. He was working in the larger dairy cooler stocking milk, eggs and cheese. It was very cold in the cooler. He locked me inside with him and would not allow me to leave until I gave him a kiss and accepted his offer to go out on a date. I didn’t really know what his initial intentions were at first. I gladly accepted and kissed him and returned back to the cash register extremely happy and excited. Our first date was to the movies to see Anaconda. We never saw the movie.

We kissed and cuddled all while the movie was going on. To this day, neither of us can tell you what the movie was about. All we know is that it was about a large snake. I think we both were more concerned about “the” anaconda than the movie itself! This was the first date of many.

We dated for about six years. We both were 17 and approaching high school graduation when we started dating.

We stayed connected through our college years. Yes, there were hard times during the courtship between two young and vibrant individuals.

She was away at her college and I was away at mine. We both had our infidelities as you would expect. We endured through it all. She knew there was something unique and special about me, and I knew there was something uniquely special about her.

Nothing could keep us apart long. In August of 2001, I graduated from Stephen F. Austin State University and she was there to support me all the way. During that same month we found out that we would become young parents of a little boy. What a game changer that was going to be.

Look back on some expectation you had before your marriage.

How have they changed now?

Our expectations were to be married later in life rather than at such an early age. Married wasn’t really at the forefront of our brains. The expectations have drastically changed now. Life and maturity makes your expectations change. At 39, you see things totally different. Your needs and wants are different. In your younger years, you expected to see a fine body, sex all night, party, have a good time and just enjoy life to the fullest. Now, you expect stability in every aspect of life. Life makes you change. It’s a partnership now. We involve each other in the decision making.

Talk about some of the responsibilities of changes you might not have been ready and how you coped with them.

As a wife, I had to adjust to the thinking process of putting my husband first. I love my son, but my son could not be first priority over my husband. I learned that this thinking pattern came from my childhood experiences. It took years for my thinking to change. It was not until several years later in our marriage that this change happened at Darwin’s barber shop one Saturday morning.

Darwin’s barber LaDetrick Leonard explained how women treat their sons like kings and fail to put their husbands in the proper order of the family. He brought to light the example on how we as a family ate at the dinner table. He asked me who’s plate do I fix first when we eat. I told him I fix my son’s plate first and then my husband’s plate. He responded that it is not right since the husband is the head of the family, the provider and that I should not place my son in that role subconsciously.

Secondly, becoming parents at an early age was extremely hard.

As a young father at the age of 22, I had to grow up real quick.

My life had changed because I had dependents. I was very selfcentered, and my thinking was that life was about me and mine until the birth of our son. It was a super challenge that took many years to overcome.

Share some of the difficult times – be as open as you are comfortable with. How did these times affect your relationship with God and with each other?

Infidelities on both parts in the relationship early on were some of the worst and difficult times for us. It was devastating especially when you feel revengeful and resentment to the person that wronged you. Ultimately, we overcame it and worked it out. It

22

GIRLFRIENDS GATHERING. 2019

was tough and an emotional rollercoaster. We believe God had to have his hand in the equation for things not to get as ugly as they could have been. He kept us together for such a time as this.

Now we are open and transparent about the pitfalls of marriage life.

Compromise is very important too. It comes in many forms. You must learn to compromise. Compromise is when both parties leave the negotiation table upset because you both gave up something in order for the deal to work. This is exactly what we had to learn to do and we are still learning.

Share some of the blessing you have received. How have they brought you together?

The greatest blessing for us was when we conceived our son.

There was a long history of female reproductive issues and we figured we could not have children. One day this little drummer boy showed up in the midst of our mess. No, we were not married at the time he was born. We married a year after his birth. When our son was born that changed our whole life and our thinking about each other. Our mindset had to change because we were about to rear a child. We purchased our first home before our son was born and raised him in our own home with the help of a very supportive family. Our completed us and made us work harder as a couple.

Talk about marriage as something that needs to be continually nurtured and allowed to grow.

You must keep it fresh and continue to re-invent yourself. You have to find what works for you. Don’t get sidetracked by looking at other people’s marriages. Come to an agreement on what works for you and move forward.

What are some things you do to keep your relationship growing?

We like to do things together as a couple, family time, read about relationships, listen to sermons on relationships, receive mentoring from older couples, read articles, hang around older married couples, hang around others with different perspectives, listen to podcast, read relationship blogs, find new ways and ideas, hanging around others with a diverse thinking and open mindset. Also, we like to host couple parties and gatherings in our home to discuss and have open dialogue about any topic concerning relationships. We have helped some many friends and other couples since we started doing this several years ago.

What special role has your faith God played in your marriage?

Our faith in God is the glue that holds it together. Faith plays a significant and major role in the marriage. God must be the center focus. He is the third cord in the relationship that binds us together. Faith strengthens the relationship to the point that you are able to overcome certain obstacles that may end other marriages. We both have served together in the music ministry for over 20 years. Darwin has served as a Minister of Music and I support him 100%. I serve alongside him as a member of music ministry. Serving in ministry has bonded us even closer in our marriage.

What does the future hold for you two?

The future is just that. We will continue to grow and love on each other more and more each day. There are some things and plans we would like to do as a couple in the future. We would love to do a relationship podcast, an inspirational and encouraging talk show discussing real life situations, blogging, mentoring other couples and a sex talk show for couples and how to keep the flame lit.

The future looks bright! We will continue to push ourselves and our son to the next dimension. We will continue focusing on our careers and supporting each other. We see great things in the future. What’s to come is better than what’s been.

How did you know you were in love?

It wasn’t love at first sight. We grew to love each other. We both had to learn to love each other. We show our love differently. We knew we were in love when we started considering each other when making decisions. We treat each other as an equal partner.

What did your parents think about him and vice versa?

My parents thought Darwin was the best thing since sliced bread.

They thought he was a good church boy. Little did they know he was an undercover playboy. My parents thought he would be great for me since I was wild back then. I believe Darwin’s family did not think or feel I was his equal and didn’t measure up to the caliber of woman they thought he should have. I felt Keisha’s family thought I came off as “more than” them.

23

GIRLFRIENDS GATHERING. 2019

Meet the Fenner’s

Robert “Mical” Fenner & Kimberly “Kim” Fenner

Married 22 years Anniversary July 13, 1996

24

GIRLFRIENDS GATHERING. 2019

I’m not good at expressing my feelings or remembering. Anyone who knows me know I don’t have a great memory, so putting this timeline of how we met and married was a pleasant visual down memory lane and our history together.

We Met at work in 1991: I worked as a receptionist at a law firm and Mical was a runner at the same law firm. I loved coffee even then, so when Mical would pass by my desk I would ask him to get me a cup of coffee and he would oblige every time. He was a cutie and always had a smile on his face. All along I didn’t know he was thinking the same about me.

Double Date October 1995: We were friends first. We would spend our lunch hour together just talking and having fun. All along, I didn’t know that he like me. He used to say I looked like

Whitney Houston. I never saw it. Anyway, we went on a double date in October 1995. I fixed him up with one of my friends at the law firm and I went out with another person that worked there. We all went to the Fair together and at some point, we switched dates realizing that we had more in common with the other person.

Marriage July 13, 1996: From that night at the Fair we were always together from that moment on. We got married on July 13, 1996.

The funny thing is that the other couple got Married later as well.

We kind of lost contact with them, but FB is a great way to keep up and I see that that also have a son named Devin as do we.

Funny huh!

July 2000 Became Foster Parents: In July of 2000, 4 years after we got married, I got a call from my sister about her grandson’s half-brothers who were 14 months and 1 week old at the time. They were taken to the hospital and CPS was involved. I had left the law firm of 10 years and was now the Children’s Court Coordinator for the Family Courts dealing with CPS cases. My sister asked me to go to the hospital and see if there was anything I could find out. I agreed and got there to find the case worker who I’d work with on numerous cases and 2 adorable little boys. Devin had a broken arm and Shawn was admitted later that same night because he had reflux. I really didn’t know what I could do. They appeared to be safe, so I was about to leave when the caseworker told me that she thought I was taking them home with me and if I didn’t, they would be going into foster care. I was kind of caught off guard, but I did not want to see those beautiful boys put into foster care. I was not loving the foster care system at that time, so I agreed to take them home for the night and give them time to investigate the situation. Mical was at work and I could not call him to get him in agreement with this decision, so I had to make it on my own. When he got home the next day, he basically had a ready-made family. This tested our marriage because he was still in honeymoon phase. If you know Mical, that’s his favorite phase (He Loves him some Me!).

April 2002 – July 2003 Loss: Mical and I had tried before this to have children but were unsuccessful. I had a son from my first marriage, Brent who was 18 at the time. During the next couple of years, I lost my Mother in 2002 and my Grandmother and my Dad in 2003, so this was a very hard time for me and my family. My parents and my grandmother were the glue that held everything together. I’m glad that they were around to meet the boys, but they did not get to see the adoption.

My Mom would babysit the boys initially when we first got them.

I’m so glad they got to be around them even for a brief time.

Adoption May 2005: I totally felt that the boys were a God send.

From that night at the hospital to present, they never left our side.

We finalized the adoption in May of 2005. By then, they won Mical over and we were the happy little family and did everything together. We starting cruising around the time we adopted the boys and every year we’d take

25

GIRLFRIENDS GATHERING. 2019

a cruise vacation. The boys basically grew up on cruise ships. These are fond memories for us all.

Moved to Arlington 2007: We moved to the Arlington area in 2007. Shawn was 7 and Devin was 9, so this has been their home for most of their life. When we moved here Mical got on with the FWPD and I had gotten my Real Estate License in 2006 and started my career while in Beaumont.

I started working with the broker that sold us our house in Arlington but realized that real estate was not my passion. I switched careers and got my Massage license in 2008 and opened True Balance Therapeutic Massage. Fast forward 18 years, both our boys have graduated high school and are planning on joining the military REAL SOON. 22 years of Marriage and Friendship. Throughout our 22 years of marriage, we have had good times and bad times, ups and downs, and I choose to live happily ever after. I learned a long time ago to pick my battles wisely and biblically cause we’re both stubborn.

Our foundation is built on our Spiritual Beliefs and mutual respect.

Even then, I tell him all the time that he’s lucky he makes me laugh. I don’t expect anyone to be perfect in a relationship, just to have respect for one another and put God first. Life is full of choices and I choose to be a Christian and to live HAPPILY EVERY AFTER with my Sweetie!

Meet

Rayfield & Doris Johnson

Married 51 years Ages 82 and 81 Six children, 13 grandchildren, 14 great-grandchildren 26

GIRLFRIENDS GATHERING. 2019

“

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.”

This infamous scripture, which comes from the portion of the bible known to many as The Love Chapter, has been the foundation for the Johnson’s sacred union. The love they share is remarkable and their bond is unbreakable. As much as they’d love to say every day has been a walk in the park, the truth is, fifty-one years of marriage has come with major tests and trials. One thing this couple has learned about marriage is, the tests and trials that may come your way is not nearly as critical as how you work through them together. Grab your favorite drink and a comfy seat, as we share a portion of Rayfield and Doris Johnson’s heartwarming

love story and how they’ve managed to experience five plus decades of marital bliss.

It was one Friday evening and the Lakeside Inn was jumping.

Back in the 60’s this happened to be one of the more popular night clubs. Yes, the now deacon, met his “good thing” at the club. It’s true, the Lord works in mysterious ways.

Doris sat at the table enjoying the company of her best friend Jewel and Don (Jewel’s date).

Her attention suddenly shifted from the table to the bar, where

a tall handsome fellow stood alone. “That man standing right there will make some woman a good husband” she confidently said to Jewel and Don. Before she knew it, the mystery man from the bar, was no longer a mystery. Well, well, well. He was Don’s cousin, Ray, and she had been introduced to him, just like that. The two hit it off immediately! So much so, there was a knock on Doris’ apartment door early the next morning.

When she opened the door, lo and behold, it was Ray. He was holding two large brown bags of groceries. You see, Doris was a single mom with two children, and although she was a hard worker, those groceries were a blessing. It was on that Saturday morning she thought to herself “This man is for real.” That’s all she wrote folks.

Fast forwarding fifty-one years later, the two have never gone a day without hearing each other’s voices.

Although it appeared to be love at first sight, the couple spent the next several years courting one another. After all, Doris was a package-deal, which meant Ray not only had one person he was learning to love. He was also determined to learn, love and win over the hearts of her two children. Some of their fondest courtship memories consist of dates to the drive-in movies and trips to Dairy Queen where they shared

27

ice cream. Over fifty years later, ice cream still remains on the sweet tooth list as one of their favorites, and quite often their midnight snack.

During their courtship years, Doris also enjoyed spending time at church. She often invited Ray to join her for Sunday morning worship, but he interestingly always had more important things to do (so he thought). The club life had subsided for her; however, she couldn’t say the same for her man. She vividly remembers the Sunday morning walks from the Rosedale Park Apartments to the church house. As she walked in one direction, Ray would drive right past her in the opposite direction; he was just not ready to give up that part of his life. Of course, Doris was very disappointed, but she knew deep down, he was a really great man. It was after the pastor extended numerous invites, when Ray finally showed up for worship service. He was soon convinced that it was time to take his relationship to the next level by making Doris his wife. When 82-year-old Ray was asked in the interview, why he chose to make this woman his wife, he sat, reminiscing. “Well, she was cute. I never saw her talking to any other guys. She was just real down to earth. She didn’t play around. She meant was she said, and I liked that about her.”

April 10th would be a day they’d both remember and celebrate always. Amidst a private and simple wedding ceremony in the living room of their pastor, Doris relinquished her maiden name and the two became known as Mr. & Mrs. Johnson. The couple continued to build a life together. Doors of opportunity swiftly opened, with new employment and a nice new home in which to raise their children. Shortly after becoming one flesh, a joint decision was made to expand their family. This led to a huge marital obstacle they would have to overcome. Sadly, the newlywed couple experienced multiple miscarriages, before Mr. Johnson decided to put his faith in action. Nineteen seventy marked the beginning of a prayer for his wife to conceive a child, preferably a boy. God not only heard his prayer, but He answered. The couple gave birth to a chubby little girl in 1971. As the prayer for a boy (and a playmate for their daughter) continued, another baby girl was born in November of 1974. Once again God did not grant the request for a son, but Mrs. Johnson was content with the children they’d been blessed with. She lovingly asked her husband to not render anymore prayers for conception.

Down through the years, parenting has presented a myriad of challenges for this mother and father, such as legal trouble, teen pregnancy, and even a few brushes with death, to name a few.

They’ve had to show some tough love to their children at times, and they’ve definitely spent a lot of time on their knees in prayer.

Mysteriously, that tough love had some odd way of disappearing from the scene once the grandkids were born. Guess that’s the job of a grandchild, huh; to steal the grandparents’ hearts and wrap ‘em around their little fingers. The beauty in this blended family has always been the non-existence of the word “step”. There is no stepdad and has never been any stepchildren; only a home filled with an abundance of love. Another parenting technique that worked in their favor was a system that did not allow the children

28

GIRLFRIENDS GATHERING. 2019

to play one parent against another. Mr. & Mrs. Johnson had each other’s backs 110% and whatever one parent said was indeed the final answer.

Serving the Lord has no doubt paid off for the Johnsons and growing together in Christ has rendered an immense return. They are the epitome of love and stability. The St. Matthew Missionary Baptist Church has been their place of worship since the day they wed in 1967. To this day, their first and only home is still a place where the family gathers, meals are served, strangers are welcomed, the phone number never changes, and the love of God is felt.

It’s because of that love, the Carey Street kids saw the Johnson home as a safe haven. The neighborhood parents considered Mr. & Mrs. Johnson a part of their village, and the overall community has been positively and tremendously impacted because of the Johnsons. Whether it has been babysitting children, feeding the hungry, carpooling kids to school, washing coats, cutting hair, teaching life skills, providing clothes or personal hygiene products, caring for the sick, transporting patients to the doctor, putting out fires, picking up members for church, hosting home bible studies, praying for those in need, and even opening their home to the homeless. With hearts larger than the state of Texas, they still find ways, even in their latter years, to make the needs of others a priority, despite their own financial struggles. They are known for representing their God well, by sharing His love. Mrs. Doris has been a great example of a wife who honors and reverences her groom, and Mr. Ray has exemplified how a husband is to love his wife, as Christ loved the church and gave himself for it. This may sound fictitious to some, but their adult children acknowledge they’ve never even seen or heard them argue in over 40 years.

Many years later, as they look back over their lives, they are truly grateful. Priceless memories flood their minds. Oh yes, they

certainly could never forget Old Faithful; that green ’69 Chevy Malibu that transported them from point A to point B, through dangers seen and unseen. Money was usually pretty tight, but when they did have a chance to take a road trip, they thoroughly enjoyed every minute. Traveling the highways, it was nothing foreign to hear “Breaker…breaker…1…9, this is Right Hand, come back” and when the Mrs. articulated her handle on the CB radio, it was “Lady Sunshine” that everyone heard. The memories could go on and on. The most cherished memory they share is the day they became one. Neither of them has any regrets, for they have loved one another unselfishly, with him being her “Punkin” and she being his “Babycakes”. The first half of the marriage, their family remembers this caring wife working diligently to meet her husband’s every need. Once he reached retirement, it was as if she tagged him and said, “You’re it!” because he has served her hand and foot, each and every day since. With great admiration, many have watched this charming love story play out before their very eyes, hoping and wishing that one day they too will have a love story just as beautiful.

When asked what words of encouragement they have for other couples, these were their words.

Mrs. Doris: “Don’t gripe, complain or nag all of the time. Be humble, cooperate, and walk together in agreement.”

Mr. Ray: “Communicate, be honest, and trustworthy. If you get angry, walk off and get yourself together. Practice, in order to keep the love flowing. To get better at anything it takes practice. Share…can’t be selfish. What’s mine is yours and what’s yours is mine. NO COURTING ON YOUR WIFE! Be truthful to her and God. Galatians 6:7 says, “Be not deceived, God is not mocked, for whatsoever a man seweth, that shall he also reap”. Meditate on the Word of God. Let God be your guide and truly trust Him!

29

GIRLFRIENDS GATHERING. 2019

30

GIRLFRIENDS GATHERING. 2019