GDAs Hear For You Winter 2025

Hear For You GDA's Newsletter

January 2025

Being a deaf dad An interview with Gilson Page 12.

Amazing fundraising adventures!

Tel: 01452 372999 Mobile/BSL: 07875 610860 email: admin@gda.org.uk

Cheltenham Festivals partnering access!

Scan this QR for a BSL version of this newsletter - enjoy!

Contents

From the Editor - page 2 Message from our Interim CEO- Jamie - page 2

GDA Services News

Interpreting Service - Page 3 Staff News - Page 4 Sally's Fundraising News - Page 5

Cheltenham Festivals - Page 6 Wellbeing Service Update - Page 7 Finance Update - Page 8 Hard of Hearing Awareness Tips - Page 8 Bite-sized BSL - page 9 Hard of Hearing News - page 10 Dalmatians & NXT GEN - page 11

Feature - Being a deaf Dad - page 12-13 Hearing Aid Clinics - Page 14 Contact Details - Back page

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From the Editor

Welcome to Hear For You, GDA’s bi-annual newsletter. Winter is well and truly here and by the time you are reading this newsletter, you are probably recovering from Christmas and New Year festivities and looking forward to 2025.

If you have ever walked through the GDA office, you know that there’s never really a quiet moment. The amazing and dedicated staff team and management are always working hard to deliver essential services to our community. There really is an energy and vibrancy to their work and I know that 2025 will be no different.

I do hope you enjoy this edition and please keep your comments and suggestions coming.

James Email - socialmedia@gda.org.uk

Message from Jamie Sleigh, our Interim CEO Hello Everyone, As GDA’s Interim CEO, and having previously served as a Trustee, I’m delighted to take on this role during a pivotal time for the charity. It’s a privilege to work alongside such a passionate team and to build on the strong foundations already in place.

As we approach the end of 2024, GDA has much to celebrate. The charity has made significant strides this year, particularly in strengthening our financial governance and reporting controls, which have led to an improved financial position. This progress reflects the collective effort and commitment of everyone involved, with a special thank you to Ivanna, our Finance Manager, for her dedication and hard work in achieving this.

Our services continue to deliver at a high standard, thanks to our incredible volunteers, staff, and partners. A heartfelt thank you to each of you for your contributions, and to our supporters, funders, and partners for your generosity, which makes it possible for us to continue delivering at such a high standard.

This year, GDA has made a profound impact, empowering Deaf and hard of hearing individuals through initiatives like NXT GEN, the Dalmatians Club and BSL College. These programmes have helped to increase awareness, foster stronger connections within the community, and build confidence and skills among our members, enabling them to thrive. These successes reflect our shared commitment to creating opportunities for the communities we serve.

As we close out the year, we also say goodbye to several team members and trustees who have moved on. Their contributions to GDA have been deeply appreciated, and we wish them all the best in their future endeavours.

Looking ahead, we are excited about GDA’s future. We are working to secure a permanent CEO, recruit new trustees to our Board to support our long-term strategy and ensure we continue providing the best support for the Deaf and hard of hearing community in Gloucestershire.

Our vision for 2025 is bold and ambitious. We aim to expand our reach and deepen our impact, ensuring that GDA remains a trusted resource for the Deaf community. Your support has been, and will continue to be, instrumental in making this vision a reality.

Thank you for being part of our journey. Together, we can make 2025 our best year yet—a year of growth, resilience, and opportunity for all.

Jamie

Jamie

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GDA Services Update Interpreting Service

Another amazing year for our Communication support department, the team have been very busy! So far (mid-November) we have booked 3179 Interpreters!! Sarah, Emily & Louise have done a fabulous job fulfilling all of these bookings, it can be quite tricky dealing with so many requests, but the team always do it with a smile on their face and always try their very best to ensure our Deaf community have interpreters when they are requested.

We are pleased to announce that GDA has retained again a number of Interpreting contracts in Gloucestershire, for the next 3 years!

ICB Gloucestershire (GP surgeries) GH&C (Gloucestershire Health & Care) GHNHSFT (Gloucestershire Hospitals NHS foundation Trust) GCC (Gloucestershire County Council for the next 2 years)

3179

BSL interpreter requests

Last year!

We are delighted to continue to work with these organisations.

If you or your organisation would like to book a BSL interpreter, please call us on 01452 372999 or email us at bslinterpreters@gda.org.uk

Thank you to our Deaf community that have shared some wonderful feedback about our Interpreters, it is really important to GDA, please do keep on sending your feedback to the team: Excellent BSL interpreter

Please do send your feedback on our interpreting service.

My Interpreter today was brilliant

If you are not comfortable with using a smartphone to leave your feedback, please do pop into the office and chat with us OR leave us a video message on 07875 610860, we would love to hear from you!

email: bslinterpreters@gda.org.uk

Worth it, BSL makes me clear, BSL excellent

Great interpreting

Nice having the interpreter automatically put in place, made things easier and hassle free. Thanks **** was very friendly, very clear and helpful

Please scan this QR code to send your feedback on our interpreting service

**** was brilliant and very clear to understand I recommend her to anyone who needs an interpreter A++++

Are you a BSL Interpreter? If you are not registered with GDA, come and work with us! Contact us at bslinterpreters@gda.org.uk

GDA Centre/Room Hire Do you need a room for a meeting, training, or for a social gathering? If so, please get in touch! We have 3 rooms to hire: our Main Hall with a capacity of around 60 and a fully equipped kitchen, our Ruby Room which would be ideal for your exercise classes, Yoga sessions or dance practice, it would also suit meetings & training, with a capacity of around 15 – 20 and we also have our Honeyford room which is ideal for meetings, with a capacity of 15 – 20. Please give us a call on 01452 372999 or email admin@gda.org.uk, with your enquiry, you can also send your request via our website: www.gda.org.uk

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Staff News!

Welcome to Renee!

Welcome to Renee Maskew who joined GDA as the Engagement and Communications Officer. Renee fell in love with the charity whilst attending one of our BSL Beginners class and the rest is history. She has embraced learning about deaf culture, BSL and is really proud to join the team to make a difference. Renee works part time at GDA alongside her studies at Hartpury.

Renee

Welcome back Emma!

We are so pleased to have Emma Jenkins back into the GDA family after a few years away.

Emma rejoins our hearing equipment team as a technician.

Emma

It’s great to see you around the office, Emma and we know our clients will be pleased too!

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s ' y l Fundraising Update l a S

Autumn and Winter have been super busy for fundraising with so many people and businesses supporting GDA and raising money for deaf and hard of hearing people in Gloucestershire. Its not just about the money raised, we also work with lots of partners to create opportunities and experiences too which all help GDA to achieve its mission of supporting people to live confidently with their hearing loss. We are so grateful to everyone who puts their time and effort into our charity.

Here is my round up of all the activity from Autumn and Winter in 2024!

September kicked off with Chris and Jordon from Midcounties Cooperative completing the Cheltenham 10k for us as part of the charity of the year partnership with the Forest of Dean Regional Community. Both did brilliantly and the GDA team were there to cheer them on. This was the warm up to their half marathon in the New Year. If you would like to run for us in 2025 get in touch Chris and Jordon today!

SKYDIVE

Thank you Vicky!

An Indian summer in late September made it possible for our final skydives of the year to take place in Salisbury. Vicky Sheen, Trustee of GDA and Katie and Joe took to the skies at 10,000ft to tandem skydive for GDA. Everyone loved the exhilarating experience and we are so proud of them and their bravery. All the skydives in 2024 raised £4000 for GDA! Look out for 2025 dates soon…

SINGO BINGO FUN! In October we brought back the very popular Singo Bingo with BSL interpretation. Gloucester Brewery was packed with people enjoying themselves as the effervescent Kim (dressed as Agnetha from Abba) alongside James Banks interpreting had the audience crying with laughter. The night raised a fantastic £720 and we want to thank Morrisons, Zigs Exercise, Midcounties and Brickhampton for their donations of raffle prizes. Also Gloucester Brewery for free use of the venue and to James and Elizabeth for volunteering to interpret the evening. Who’s coming back next year?

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10K

Joe and Katie - skydive heroes!

QUIZ NIGHT

Midcounties Co-operative organised a fantastic fundraising quiz for the charity partners across the region which included GDA, Cheltenham Open Door and Stroud Valleys project. A brilliant night at Gloucester Brewery raised £800. We want to thank Jon Little and his team for all their hard work and a great night. Looking forward to the next one already!

GDA is supported by many trusts, foundations and businesses. This funding and stability enables us to continue to provide vital services to deaf and hard of hearing people across the county. We want to thank Gloucestershire Disability Foundation, Barnwood Trust, Zurich Community Trust, Morrisons Foundation, Gloucestershire County Council, Pied Piper, Active Impact, Forrester Fund, Benefact, Gloucestershire Community Foundation, Lennox Hannay Trust, Cheltenham Festivals, Giffords Circus and Specsavers.

We’ve had an incredible year with Cheltenham Festivals in 2024. Our partnership continues to go from strength to strength with more BSL interpreted events, connections tickets for our community and raising awareness around accessibility and inclusivity for deaf and hard of hearing people at the festivals. We have thoroughly enjoyed attending the Jazz, Science and Literature Festivals this year with new and exciting opportunities for people to enjoy.

We are very grateful to the team at Cheltenham Festivals for all their hard work this year with captioning, seating plans and BSL interpreter arrangements. We have been on the radio and even attended a reception at Number 10 Downing Street to celebrate our engagement and partnership. We cant wait for 2025!

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Wellbeing Service Update We have continued running our popular lipreading classes every Tuesday at GDA and in Cheltenham. These sessions provide a friendly and supportive environment for people with hearing loss to develop lipreading skills and build confidence in communication. Combining practical learning with social interaction, the group offers a great opportunity to connect with others who share similar experiences.

Whether you’re just starting out or looking to improve your skills, the group is here to help, offering a welcoming space to socialise and form lasting friendships. We’re hopeful to secure further funding for these sessions in 2025.

Christmas Market Trip In August, we held a coffee morning featuring a visit from Q-Care, who came along to chat with the community and share how they can offer support. The event was a great success and well attended.

We also hosted a delightful afternoon tea in August, where members of the community joined us for tea, scones, and sandwiches. It was a wonderful afternoon and a pleasure to catch up with some familiar faces we hadn’t seen in a while.

Giffords Circus, wellbeing walks and a Christmas Market Trip In September, we organised a trip to Giffords Circus. Despite the less-than-perfect weather, the venue ensured accessibility for those with mobility challenges, and the show itself was fantastic and enjoyed by all.

In November, the fire service joined us at a coffee afternoon to provide valuable advice on staying safe at home. The discussion was engaging and encouraged everyone to think more carefully about fire safety for themselves and their loved ones.

On 27th November, we spend an amazing day out at the Cardiff Christmas Market with lots of our community members. Everyone thoroughly enjoyed it!

Please do keep an eye out on forthcoming events.

Note! Please check events with Kate - wellbeing@gda.org.uk

Gifford’s Circus Trip

Finance Update

The past 12 months have been an incredibly productive and transformative period for the Finance Department. We’re pleased to share some of the key achievements that have strengthened our financial operations and processes: Successful Migration to New Accounting Software: We’ve completed the move to a modern accounting system, alongside implementing a new coding structure. These upgrades have significantly improved the quality and efficiency of our financial reporting to the Senior Management Team, CEO, and Board.

First External Audit Successfully Passed: This milestone demonstrates our commitment to transparency and robust financial management.

Gift Aid Claim Process Introduced: We’re now able to maximise the value of donations, ensuring every contribution goes even further.

Streamlined Financial Processes: Across the board, various processes have been refined, creating a more efficient and effective department.

These improvements reflect our ongoing dedication to ensuring the charity’s financial health and sustainability.

Ivanna Finance Manager

On a more personal note, it is bittersweet to share that I will be leaving GDA after Christmas to join a charity closer to home. While I am excited for the next chapter, I am confident that the improvements we have introduced will continue to strengthen the organisation’s operations. GDA is in great hands, with a dedicated team committed to driving its mission forward. The long-term future looks bright, and I am proud to have been part of such a positive journey.

Thank you to all my colleagues for the warm welcome and encouragement over this past 15 months — it has been an absolute privilege to work alongside you.

Ivanna Novikova Finance Manager

Hard of Hearing Awareness Tips

People who have hearing loss have individual communication needs and you should ask someone how best you can communicate with them. Not every tip below will be appropriate for every person who has hearing loss.

If you’re communicating with a Hard of Hearing (HOH) person, there are some simple things that you can do to make things easier for both parties. Here are some simple HOH awareness tips to help improve communication.

Get their full attention - Make sure you have the person’s attention before you start speaking, so they don’t miss the start of the conversation. Use simple gestures such as pointing or waving to get someone’s attention.

Maintain eye contact - Try not to look away, cover your mouth or face from the person when you’re talking to them.

Keep your distance - Stand a metre or two away from the deaf person. This is important for hearing-aid users and lip-readers.

Reduce background noise - Be mindful of background noise if the person is trying to hear you. In a noisy place, move to a quieter area if possible.

Be patient - Take your time, don’t give up. Don’t shout, it won’t help, and you might look angry.

Speak at a normal volume, as it can be uncomfortable for a hearing aid user if you shout, and it can also distort facial movements, making it harder to lip-read.

Ensure you speak clearly, not too slowly, and using normal lip movements, facial expressions and gestures.

Be as concise and clear as possible, using plain language, so that it is easier to follow the key points.

Periodically check that what you are saying is being understood. If someone doesn’t understand what you’ve said, be patient and try saying it in a different way. If you both feel you are not communicating effectively, it can sometimes be helpful to write it down or type it out.

Use your mobile phone to help you. Apps like Make It Big will help when typing out messages, or try use speech-to-text software such as Google Live Transcribe.

Write it down Use old fashioned writing to communicate.

Other things to consider

Don’t give up

For longer chats, find a place to talk with good lighting, away from noise and distractions. Make sure your face is not in shadow and there are no strong lights or sunshine in their eyes.

Try to use rooms with good acoustics so that there is less interference from background noise, and be aware of potential noise distractions such as air conditioning units, projectors, background music and communal areas.

Good lighting is important for lip-reading. Make sure the room is well-lit and avoid sources of light that cast shadows on faces. If possible, have any window blinds either fully open or fully closed to avoid shadows across people’s faces.

Remember - Do not make assumptions, even if someone uses a hearing aid, it may be helpful for them to also lip-read. Be aware that lip-reading requires sustained focus and concentration which can be very tiring.

Be mindful that hard of hearing people may not be able to hear the tone of what’s being said, so some jokes or sarcasm may not be understood. Try to ensure everyone is included where possible.

And arguably one of the most important points to remember is to keep trying – even if a person does not understand what you’re saying the first few times. So many have told us that when someone says ‘oh, don’t worry. It doesn’t matter’ it feels like they mean ‘you don’t matter.’ Even if it takes four or five times of rephrasing or even writing it down, don’t give up.

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10 Week bite-sized courses in BSL! Our BSL Beginners’ Course is proving popular! These are three 10-week blocks called BEGIN, BUILD and CONVERSE, designed to get you started on your BSL journey. The next BEGIN course, a 10-week block, will be starting again in January 2025. If you would like to learn BSL, then this is the course for you. Please enquire at bslcollege@gda.org.uk Our new BSL Level 2 course has been restyled as our Intermediate Course which consists of three shorter blocks following the same structure as our Beginner’s Course, called STEP UP, ENGAGE and ADVANCE. This means you can study without the worry of completing assessments required for a Level 2 qualification. There is an option to follow up with a 5-week assessment course to gain the full qualification at the end of the Intermediate Course. The next Intermediate Course will begin in January 2025. Please email bslcollege@gda.org.uk to enrol!

Finally, we want to wish a huge congratulations to all those who have recently passed BSL Level 2 and Level 3 – well done to everyone who worked hard to achieve these amazing qualifications! This could be you – why not contact us today to start your BSL learning journey?

Bespoke Deaf Awareness training

BSL College Update!

Thanks to the great work of our BSL teachers, Kim, Nicola and William, and with some more results to come, we’ve so far had an average of a 75% pass rate with our current group of students who are taking exams in Levels 1 and 3.

There as still places on all courses - so don’t miss your chance to learn!

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Hard of Hearing News Access to the Theatre and Cinema

For more details on all of these points and to download all of our hard of hearing resources please visit our website - https://www.gda.org.uk/downloads

The following theatres and cinemas offer access to performances, concessions or complimentary tickets for carers. Access may differ but please download our full document to find out more.

Everyman Theatre, Cheltenham Sherborne Cinema Cheltenham Playhouse Bacon Theatre, Cheltenham Cheltenham Town Hall

Gloucester Guildhall Cineworld Bristol Hippodrome Stroud Subscription Rooms

Roses Theatre Tewkesbury Barn Theatre Cirencester King’s Theatre Gloucester Sundial Theatre Cirencester

Are you ready for Digital Phone lines?

Advice from Openreach By 31st January 2027 service providers will need to migrate most analogue telephone lines to digital phone lines.

How will the digital upgrade affect me?

For most people upgrading to digital services should be straightforward. Moving to a digital phone line means that your phone service will be delivered over the internet, similar to Zoom or Skype.

Where an Ultrafast Full Fibre broadband service is available you’ll be upgraded from an analogue phone line to a digital one when you place an order and request a phone service or sign up to a new contract, whether you’re changing provider, upgrading or re-grading.

Some service providers may choose to upgrade their customers sooner, so you might see this reflected in their product offerings. We recommend that you check what’s available on their website.

Transport Concessions and Bus Passes and Blue Badge There is a Free Bus Pass (Glos. County Council) for people who are disabled and/or cannot drive for medical reasons.

You're eligible for a disability-related pass if you: are profoundly or severely deaf.

If you are unable to travel alone due to your disability you may be eligible for a companion bus pass. This will allow you to be accompanied by any person over 16 years of age, free of charge.

Download your D2 form for a free bus pass from our website https://www.gda.org.u k/downloads

For more details please visit our downloads page https://www.gda.org.uk/downloads

Blue Badge Eligibility You are eligible if: ·you receive the higher rate of the mobility component of the Disability Living Allowance (DLA) ·you receive a Personal Independence Payment (PIP) because you can’t walk more than 50 metres (a score of 8 points or more under the ‘moving around’ activity of the mobility component) ·you receive the mobility component of PIP and have obtained 10 points specifically for descriptor E under the ‘planning and following journeys’ activity, on the grounds that you are unable to undertake any journey because it would cause you overwhelming psychological distress… ·For more info see; https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/blue-badge-can-i-get-one/can-i-get-a-bluebadge

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A year of fun, growth and new connections This year has been filled with exciting activities and memorable moments for our NXT GEN and Dalmatians families, and we are thrilled to share the highlights of our recent events as we wrap up a year of fun, growth, and community connections.

NXT GEN Fun: A season of games, ice-skating and pizza parties Our NXT GEN group has been busy enjoying some fantastic outings, starting with a competitive game of Crazy Golf followed by a lively arcade game session. The fun continued with a pizza party, bringing everyone together for a well-deserved treat. The ​laughter ​ and camaraderie were evident, making it a day to remember!

As we slide into the festive season, the NXT GEN group gathered for a magical ice skating experience in Cheltenham’s beautiful Imperial Gardens. After a fun-filled time on the ice, everyone enjoyed a delicious dinner at Prezzo to round off the day, marking the perfect conclusion to a year of incredible events. These activities not only brought joy but also fostered a sense of togetherness that will continue to thrive in the coming year.

A year ogrowth and adventure

This year has been a remarkable one for Dal’s, with 17 new families joining our Dalmatian sessions— a true testament to the growing community spirit. Our families have had the opportunity to take part in two exciting trips off-site, including a visit to The Music Works and a trip to the Chamwell Centre for swimming, soft play, and a delightful lunch. These trips have been a wonderful way to explore new environments and create lasting memories.

One of the most magical moments took place in November, when children had the chance to watch Gizmo the wizard perform his spellbinding tricks. Laughter filled the air as both children and adults were enchanted by his fun-filled performance.

With such a successful year behind us, we can’t wait to see what next year has in store. Our community continues to grow, and we’re excited to welcome even more families into the fold, creating lasting friendships and memories through exciting events and outings.

As we approach the end of the year, we want to take a moment to thank all the families who have participated in our events and made this year so special. The holiday season promises to bring even more joy, and we are looking forward to celebrating with all of you at our upcoming events!

Here’s to a bright, festive end to 2024 and an even brighter year ahead!

​​

To come along to NXT GEN or Dalmatians, please email us at CYPF@gda.org.uk

​ The Dalmatians Club is an opportunity for the whole family to enjoy a friendly and supportive environment – it is a chance for the children to engage with other deaf children and to feel confident. It is also an opportunity for the parents to learn from the experience of other parents and to share their concerns and their successes.

The cost to attend The Dalmatians Club is £2 per child. For more information about joining The 11 Dalmatians Club please contact 01452 372999, text 07875 610860 or email dalmatians@gda.org.uk.

Being a Deaf Dad An interview with GDA’s Gilson Sly Many of you may already know our fun loving and sometimes mischievous Support Service Manager, Gilson Sly but you may not know the passion, energy and drive he has to improve the lives of deaf people. As a deaf father to deaf children, I was really interested to know more about his experience growing up and what he thinks is important in the raising of deaf children.

How was your upbringing different from that of your children?

I was brought up like I was no different from anyone else. But when those differences became more apparent, I may not have been as equipped as I could have – I remember going to see a careers adviser at the age of 14 and wanted to be a policeman – no you can’t – you’ve got hearing aids. I want to be a fireman – no you can’t you’ve got hearing aids.

So you got to a point where you realised you were different from other kids around you. Were there other deaf people around you at that time?

I went to a school where I was the only person who was deaf and had a teaching assistant sitting with me in the classroom, then at secondary school I went to a hearing support centre and I was very aware that I was one of the few that were speaking. I found that very difficult because I was always saying ‘pardon’, ‘sorry,’ ‘what?’ to my hearing peers and to my deaf peers, I didn’t know their language. So I couldn’t understand and I couldn’t fit in. I tried my best but I always felt stuck in the middle.

Were you in a mainstream setting in a classroom with hearing students?

Yes I had a teaching assistant who would be taking notes for me . I would be concentrating on what’s being said but I struggled to understand what everyone was saying in the room.

Did you have friends in the class? Close friends who you would sit next to?

No. I don’t think there was anyone I really felt close with or good mates with, really.

“I hated school”

So what happened at break time?

I would run around and play tag or join in in the game of football. But quite often I would just walk around the school on my own just trying to kill time. My parents didn’t know but I didn’t want them to worry about me. I just cracked on with it.

I hated school. I didn’t enjoy it at all. But I worked really hard for my GCSEs and got four C’s. They’ve not helped much to be honest! Looking back now I think the only real things I learned from that whole experience is resilience and the ability to adapt. It’s not until now that I’ve learned I’m dyslexic too and then I think, wow – no wonder I found it so tough. But now when I look back, I understand that given the right support, there’s no limits as to what you can achieve.

If there was one thing they could have implemented as support for you at school, that really would have helped you, what would it have been?

My deaf identity. Although they might have even tried to do that but maybe I wasn’t ready. My Mum and Dad were telling me I was the same as everyone else and they didn’t want me to be held back by it. So, they weren’t saying ‘You are not deaf’ but what they were saying was ‘You are no different, you are just the same as everybody else’ so they were trying to deliver a positive message in that way. Obviously, that’s what every parent wants. They don’t want their child to feel different from everyone else. I think today’s message is clearer though and it’s about celebrating your difference.

I don’t regret that experience because it has put me where I am today. After I left school, football was my way of making friends and socialising. I then worked in McDonalds for five years on customer service.

I just got on with it. I even worked the drive through. I think it was because I had good coping skills and I would just crack on. But then it was almost a double edged sword because I appeared to be coping just fine and that in turn made people forget about my deafness and think that there’s no issue there. Gilson just gets on with it – he’s absolutely fine.

It seems that you have really had to earn your deaf identity.

Yes definitely. It wasn’t until I met Elizabeth, my wife that I discovered it. I really liked her but she signed. So, I had to learn to sign and then I threw myself into Deaf culture. I went to Deaf club twice a week and I just got sucked in and it was like ‘Wow!’ I had a real anxiety about if I was really Deaf. Do I fit in? Because I could hear to a certain extent. I could speak quite clearly.

Whereas most of them couldn’t, they were using British Sign Language. There was also a bit of politics within the Deaf Community about whether people were really ‘Deaf’. But I knew it was where I belonged. So we met in 2003 and then got married in 2007 and then Jack was born in 2009.

So you were in a relationship with another Deaf person, using BSL. Was that ‘communication heaven’?

Yes, it was. But then when my children were born and we found out they were deaf, my family said, ‘Well we’re going to have to learn sign language because your son is deaf,’ and that actually upset me and Elizabeth a bit. We were like, well what about us? Also I struggled a little bit going to see my family because I had to become the interpreter there, and so I didn’t really get to see my family because I was too busy trying to make sure that everyone understood each other. They’re well aware of that now and they try their best to communicate direct in sign language and avoid asking me to interpret for them. Its made things a lot better.

So you are both a dad who is Deaf but also you are the father of Deaf children. As a Deaf dad, did you ever feel excluded from the regular process of becoming a new dad?

We couldn’t really access the ante-natal classes. We never took part in any of that, purely because there was no access to it. Me and Liz depended on each other during that, we were empowered by each other.

My nervousness at the time was that if it was a hearing child, I was hoping that I’d be able to understand them and I didn’t want to miss out on that bond.

So really you were concerned that they might be hearing, rather than deaf?

A hundred percent! When we found out our children were Deaf, we celebrated it! (laugh) So how was that news given to you?

It was, ‘I’m really sorry, your child is deaf.’ But we were happy, because that’s what we wanted.

Actually, they didn’t like our reaction at all and were considering reporting us to the hospital board for neglect because of it. It was because they thought we were denying the opportunity of a cochlear implant so straight away we were battling but we stuck to our guns.

I’m Deaf, I know what works for me, I know what works. I don’t have a cochlear implant, my wife doesn’t, my mother in law doesn’t, she’s a British Sign Language user and she’s got a degree so I know my children are going to be okay without one.

For some parents deafness is totally new to them the day they find out their child is deaf and so they won’t even know that there are choices they can make. .

That’s why I’m so passionate about the work I do at GDA. It’s about helping parents feel that they are empowered and telling them that that feeling they are getting in their gut, they are allowed to explore. It’s fine. Go for it. Just because a professional is telling you something, nobody knows that child better than you.

Its about identity too. There are opportunities you get because you are deaf. You could still represent England if you love football for example, by playing in the Deaf team. You can represent your country in rugby, you can go to the Olympics, the Deaf Olympics.

Obviously you made a decision for your children not to have a cochlear implant but there are parents who have chosen to go down the cochlear route.

It’s a personal choice. And for me it’s a conversation where we are just broadening the understanding about what the options are and making sure that we aren’t just trying to change the child so that they’ll fit in and instead we are exploring how we can change the environment.

So what was it like being a deaf dad through all those stages, from a baby to a toddler?

We had a Bellman’s monitor that would vibrate when the baby cried. But you’d feel bad when you realise the battery had run out and the poor thing had been crying without us knowing. But then they’d be fine and laughing again once they were with us. Then when they were toddlers, I couldn’t shout at them when they were in danger. If they were about to run across the road, I had to run as fast as I can to get to them and grab them before they ran out. There’s been a few times when I’ve seen they’re about to wander into danger and I’ve had to belt it to get to them. So there’s a heightened sense of alert to being a Deaf dad looking after deaf kids.

You need to be more aware of what’s around you.

"You’ve got to create the right environment."

So, if you met a new parent and they found out their child was deaf, what advice would you give them?

For parents I would always advise not to put too much pressure on yourself from the start. I know in those early days, audiology will give you so much information that it’s an absolute information overload. You’ve also got to remember that the hospital staff are looking at the deafness from a medical view. From a medical perspective, unfortunately they see your child as broken, and they need to fix that. But there’s a bigger picture. It’s about embracing the deafness. I appreciate though from the early days, that will be quite difficult to accept. It’s difficult to accept because you’re accepting that your child is not the same as everybody else. That they are going to be different from you. But you need to be able to reach a point where you are celebrating their difference and their uniqueness.

For me its about trying not to focus on the child but instead looking at what the environment is around your child. A lot of the time it is wholly focussed on the ears and what the child can’t do. Actually, let’s focus on what they can do. You’ve got a healthy child, that’s fantastic. There’s so much you can do. You can go and find your local deaf charity and find out what they have to offer. Like our Dalmatians club. That’s why we set it up. One of the most powerful interactions you can have is speaking to other parents of deaf children. A real pleasure of mine is to see those parents bouncing off each other, sharing their experience. It’s so powerful. It gives parents the feeling that they’re not alone and its going to be all right and the child is looking around and thinking, “They’ve got a hearing aid, that one has got a cochlear implant and that one is using their hands to talk.”

It’s what I always say to parents. With our children, whatever they want to do in life, we look to open as many doors as possible. Of opportunities, of skills, of choices and that’s what we aim to do. For some reason as soon as parents find out their child is deaf, there seems to be restrictions put on them and the doors are closed. Why?Open the British Sign Language door, open the communication door, open the oralism/lipreading door because by doing that you’re empowering and enriching the child. You’re helping them to understand themselves better and explore their identity a bit more. I mean they might get to ten or eleven and tell you they don’t want to sign anymore because it makes them look silly. That’s fine because the beauty of the door is that it can be opened again when they choose.It’s a journey the child should be allowed to make, to open and close these doors and to change their minds and go back and explore.

What can GDA offer new parents?

I think GDA offers lived experience of deafness. It also offers the opportunity to talk to other parents. Opportunities for your child to meet other deaf children. That’s what’s GDAs all about, yes you have a hearing loss, but it doesn’t define you. Let’s look at what we can do to make things easier. We fit a flashing doorbell, now you’re able to receive deliveries and not miss them. For some people, that’s amazing. “I’m not going to miss my tablet prescription anymore” – its life-changing. For parents, it’s that opportunity to come to Dalmatians and say something like, “Does anyone else get really annoyed that your child squeezes their eyes shut when you’re trying to tell them off!” and getting that laughter and shared experience from other parents. It’s an opportunity, like our slogan says, for you as a parent and for your child to be confident about their deafness.

If you are the parent or carer of a deaf child and would like to access GDAs services, please call 01452 372 999 or email cyps@gda.org.uk

Hearing Aid Clinics Our hearing aid clinics are as busy and popular as ever. Our expert technicians can service your hearing aids free of charge and are happy to give advice and guidance on ways to ensure your hearing aids are working at optimum levels.

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If you are deaf or hard of hearing, to demand inclusion at work takes confidence.

At GDA, we provide communication support, specialist equipment, deaf awareness training, digital inclusion workshops and sign language classes to support deaf people and their employers to feel more confident in the workplace.

Donate to count them in. www.gda.org.uk Tel: 01452 372999 Mobile/BSL: 07875 610860 email: admin@gda.org.uk www.gda.org.uk GDA, Colin Road, Barnwood, Gloucester, GL4 3JL Company Limited by Guarantee 2692718.

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