FEATURE
sometimes devastating effect, even to the point of suicide. A lady I know is quite involved supporting and promoting the Anti-Bullying Campaign. She introduces, wherever possible and relevant, the subject of bullying in a tactful and delicate manner at the children’s parties and get-togethers she often organises and also extends the `anti-bullying chat’ to older kids and teenagers at gatherings during summer on the beach. She suggested Head Boys and Girls in schools could act as ambassadors for the Anti-bullying Campaign whilst keeping an eye out in the playground and other school corners, especially with the increase in the use of mobiles and iPads providing the ideal means for what’s become that dreaded practice of cyber bullying, not uncommon nowadays. Bullying fact sheets on the internet and Dignity at Work (Gibraltar) also highlight many potential incidents of abuse which are now defined as bullying. Many which you may have thought are annoying and
even stressful after a time, but you wouldn’t necessarily describe as bullying. These days they are described as incidents of abuse - incidents you would normally recognise as relatively trivial. There are numerous issues nowadays that fall under the `bullying banner’... bad mouthing, being overlooked or ignored, excluded, not given credit and/or taking credit for your efforts, being patronised, keeping someone out of a group online or offline, denied training and promotion, breaking a promise, audible sighing in your presence, disrespecting your opinions, ignoring your concerns etc. etc. and the list goes on and on to the point that you would be forgiven for thinking that almost anything, and I mean any little word, sentence or action perceived to be directed at you repeatedly, constitutes bullying. Whilst much of the above can be very upsetting and a real nuisance I’m sure there are many of us who would not label those concerns as bullying and maybe some other word could describe those concerns. Today, there seems to be a very fine line between the traditional bullying practices of physical and strong, inyour-face verbal bullying we have generally come to associate with the word, and practically anything else that’s an unpleasant experience whether at work or elsewhere. In fact the bullying problem today reminds me of the other flavour-of-the-month of the times in which we live – having to be aware of being `PC’ or keeping to the political correctness fad which is something we really have to look out for to avoid being offensive in any scenario, having to be always on the lookout and being extra careful about what you say, because it may be disrespectful and `politically incorrect!’ But whist dwelling on the `B’ word, cyber bullying especially, as it’s so prevalent amongst the young, I would describe as bullying. That needs to be halted and it seems in whatever form it’s delivered, being bullied – whether you’re
GIBRALTARINSIGHT.COM
MARCH 2019
young or less young - can cause unbearable strain and trauma which can lead to serious consequences. The distress can cause untold damage to children and teenagers who may be going through a critical stage in their young lives. So the message has to be, to those young individuals being affected, `talk to someone and let it all out, don’t bother about what others may think,’ and today we have Childline, Sams and Dignity at Work as well as other groups that are there, ready to listen and help. All it takes is a telephone call – it could make all the difference and we shouldn’t assume verbal bullying is just words. Words CAN hurt you, and no child or anyone should put up with it by keeping it to themselves. Some of what I’ve written may have come across as flippant and uncaring – It’s not the intention. What has spurred me on to write the article is simply the catalogue of issues that have now become to be listed as anti social behaviour defined as bullying. I feel that much of it, at a glance, you could be forgiven for considering as bothersome, irritating and very annoying but not necessarily as bullying. Being generally ignored when your boss walks into the office without offering a `good morning’ I would hardly consider bullying, but that behaviour apparently comes seriously into play when the occurrence is performed repeatedly and intentionally (if it can be proved). Constantly using words or actions against you or a group can cause distress and affect your wellbeing, in some cases causing unbearable strain and trauma as a result of being bullied! Hence the message must surely be, no matter how small or seemingly insignificant the issue is, mistakenly treating it as just annoying - if it’s constantly repeated and comes across as intentional – could well be a case of you or others being bullied, we’re told. So there’s a need to be brave, speak out and never keep it in. Don’t suffer in silence!
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